28 Hour Show - 2006 - Hour 14

0:00Oh, come on. Well, it just ended. Oh, okay. It just ended while Mike was mocking me. I was not mocking her. Well, then what did you mean when you said, it hurts, but it feels so good, and then you turned your back to me and wouldn't make eye contact with me? That's the thing. What were you referring to when you were saying it? I took a bite of Lou Bush's hot wings. Hot wings, yeah. And I said to you, I just took a bite of Lou Bush's hot wings. And you go, why do you do that to yourself? And I go, because it hurts. And then I said, very matter-of-factly, but truthfully, but it feels so good. And then I heard a noise in the studio adjacent to us. And I turned around and looked at the noise. And you took that as me mocking you. What, did he hear a noise? Wow. Noise always penetrates these walls. Well, it's a soundproof studio. Yeah, that's what they say. Sean. So you want to talk some more about Eddie's utensils, Sean? Oh, you are a bee. And you started it. Oh, yes. Thank you for reminding me. You're welcome. Here we go. And now death to Sean. Here we go. Every time I try and speak the truth. Oh, the truth. Really? This is what I get. This is what I get. Okay, here's what the truth is. Sean is psycho.

1:28And he came over to my house. Excuse me. Sean is psycho. He came over to my house, and we were preparing a meal. He was going through my kitchen utensils, inspecting each and every one of them. freaking out that there was a couple of water spots on the dishwasher on the utensils. That's what it was, Sean. You could make up your stories, your crazy-ass stories all you want, but that's the truth. No, it was a lot more than water spots, although water spots would have been bad enough. Because what? You would be infected with water, you freak? Dude, there was flex on it. Flex of what? Flecks of matter. Food stuff. I don't know, man. You're a fleck. Fuck you. Hey. It was insulting. It was an insult. It's like talking to a person that knows what you're talking about. It's not an insult if it's true. All I'm saying is when I opened the drawer and I looked at what was inside, I would say, excuse me. I would say.

2:3780 to 90% of the utensils in there had either water spots or flex or chunks of matter. Sean, don't even try to talk to this guy. Because all he does is make sense. So don't even try it. Thank you. Seriously, because you're going to go around in circles. You're going to go around in circles. Whatever, dude. Whatever. You're going to go around in circles. Whatever. I don't see why it's such an awful, awful thing that I want silverware that is clean. And I wouldn't. You think I eat there with a bunch of dirt on my utensils? I'm not a pig. I'm not busting Rob. Those utensils. No offense, Rob. Which I am about to put into my... Okay, don't take it seriously. Oh, you made him shut down. Mike, you can talk about this. He goes over to your house and looks up at the glasses and keeps them in the light. It's offensive. If they have stuff on them, why would I want to use them? They're filthy.

3:40They're filthy. You're filthy. No. Whatever. Your attitude is filthy. You guys, I'm almost done having dinner. Just argue a couple more minutes. Oh, it's ridiculous. It is not ridiculous. I'll tell you what's ridiculous. What's ridiculous is having silverware that has been dragged through my bottles. That's ridiculous. This is what's ridiculous. The Hershey Highway. It's equivalent. It's ridiculous. It is not equivalent. It is not equivalent. I would not serve you something that's dirty. I wouldn't eat something off a dirty place. I'm sorry, but it happened. Guess what? You're crazy. Oh. No. Ring, ring, ring, ring. Sean's crazy. Hello? Who's there? Who's there? It's Sean's crazy. Hey, Sean's crazy. Uh-oh. Okay. May I speak with the same person?

4:39They are a crazy term. I'm so sorry that I didn't want to put chunks of mud in my mouth. Chunks of mud, really? Really? Chunks of mud? Yes. Yes. I'm going to put a chunk of my fist in your throat. Oh, there it is. Right there. Okay. Uh-oh. I see we're getting somewhere now. Oh, we certainly are. Yeah, we are. Guys, I really care about both of you, so let me get a soft drink. Filthy. John, don't say another word. About your dirty silverware? Bro, you son of a... Eddie, sit down. Sit down, Eddie. I'll reconsider. You're full of crap, and you know it. You sit down. My utensils are clean.

5:38All right. I'm a clean human being. Okay. They may not be John Spotless Psycho. Oh, you don't need to call them names, buddy. They're clean and edible. Oh, I'm sorry that I don't want spots. I'm sorry that you're insane. Blacks. Uh-oh. Chunks. Bring plastic. Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me. Rotted food stuff. Right. Right, because that's how I love to eat my dinner. I love to eat my dinner with the rotted food stuff. Doing good? I'm having a combination of everything, you know. Yeah, it looks good. Applebee's brought a nice spread for dinner. Now, here's the deal. Eight divided by two is four divided by two is two divided by two is one. This is a normal person right there for you. There's nothing wrong with that, Eddie. Really? What's the matter with what he did? He put some Purell antibacterial lotion. Eight pumps on his hand. And then he talked himself through how many divided buys. Just thinking about those utensils. You son of a... Made you have to put that on? Yes, it did. It absolutely did. Hope somebody spit in your food. Hey, Eddie, you don't mean that. You don't, Eddie. No, you don't because he's your friend. Oh, I certainly do.

7:05Uh-uh. He's insulting me. He isn't. This is how he feels. Oh, man. That is rich, dude. That is rich. Oh, really? Yeah, that was rich I was doing. That was rich I was doing. That was rich I was doing. You guys remember him. You remember him. Sean, come here. Give me a kiss. No! Yummy. Yummy. Did P1 paparazzi take off? Yes. It was very nice of him. Thank you, paparazzi. And he said if we're lucky, maybe one day he'll bring us some of his delicious homemade pumpkin cheesecake. Oh, I hope it's as delicious as guacamole. Guacamole was great. That was a messed up thing for you to say about P1 Paparazzi because you didn't even try the guacamole. Right? I don't need to try it, dude. It was grubbing. Mikey's show, hello. This is P1 Eric, the lifeguard. I was just wondering if Peto and Sean are getting along right now.

8:11Are they having any confrontation? No, dude. I haven't had any confrontation with Uncle Sean because I have yet to bring up his clothing attire for this evening. Oh, no. Maybe we should do a fashion show. Maybe not. Ralph Lauren presents Shants 2006. What are Shants? Uh-oh. I'm glad that you asked, Uncle Eddie. Shut up. My pleasure, Beto. Shants are the shoes you wear with your pants. Shants. It means that you have stringless shoes and convertible pants. Lovely. Shants. Shut up. Oh, wait a minute. No, I didn't think that one through correctly. Shants are shorts that are pants. Yes. Shants. Thank you. Get that correct. You know, Uncle Eddie, like, let's say you had to go to a funeral followed by a game of volleyball. Come on. Wow. That'd be perfect. Yeah. You could turn your pants into shorts and then play volleyball in them. Shands. Okay. Uncle Sean also has shoes.

9:44That have no strings on them. What are those called? Stringless shoes. Or strews. And slews? Yes. Oh, no. Yes. Stop helping, Eddie. Slews. They're not slews. They're just regular shoes. Uncle Sean. Wow. It's time. It's time for me to go nigh-nigh. Tell me a story. Come on, Uncle Sean. Tell him a story. Uncle Sean. About utensils. Tell me. Okay. No, we didn't. No, we didn't. There once was a filthy drawer with filthy utensils in Eddie's house. What's their chance? Don't you have a picnic to get to? Whatever. Or a business meeting? This is my time. Don't you have a dishwasher to get to?

10:48My best ear. It's my time. Oh, no. Oh, no. It's my nephew, Beto. I like him. Thank you, and goodbye. Hi, this is P1T1. Hi. I'm a first-time caller, long-time listener. Just wanted to say that I love you guys. Thank you so much. That's really nice of you to call in and say that. Thank you very much. Bye. I appreciate that. It's nice. She's been listening for a long time, never called. I like it. Miss is here. Oh, no. Look at that. It's Missy and Nolan. Oh, what does that mean? What does that mean? Oh, yes. I don't like the sound of it. What's Nolan doing here? What do you think he's doing here? I don't want to know, Mikey. He's here to battle you. Yeah! Come on, Mikey. That's right. Round two. That's right. Oh, my man. Missy's son, Nolan.

11:52I don't want to do that again. Missy's son, Nolan, is here to battle Ashley again. But he beat me last year, and it was really embarrassing. What grade is he in? What grade is Nolan in? Well, now he's in eighth. Now he's really going to wipe you out. Super smart. He is really smart. It's not even funny. And I've been out of school for a while now. This is going to be fantastic. Is he going up against Ashley? Dude, this is ridiculous. Maybe we could get him to go up against Skye in a pronunciation thing after. Oh, wow. Unnecessary shot at Skye. Come on. Before you say anything, Skye. Skye, before you say anything, I think it's high time on the Mikey show that we recognize when somebody has said something that is mean.

12:57Albeit funny. A retort for that. Oh, wow. I didn't know I was accepting awards. Allow me to retort. Maybe after he's done with me, he can go head-to-head with B-Rob on a hygiene test. Or a Red Sox trivia test. Well, duh. I mean, that's just too easy for him to win. He sucks at that. Nobody picked you in American Idol or for the questionnaire. Rob! Wow. What is with him right now? At least I know my trivia, bro. What is with him right now? At least I know my trivia. No, you don't. You lost that, too. But I did really well compared to him. That's true. I'll tip my hat to that. Shut up. I'm sorry. I'm trying to get... All right. Now, when are we going to do the thing with Ashley and Nolan? Whatever you want. Why are you chewing into the microphone so obnoxiously? Sounds delicious, though. There's about a million things we didn't do today. It's okay. We still have like a million hours. We've only got like an hour left in the show. That's not true. Getting excited for Lost? Yeah, let's talk about a couple of things here, okay? Lost? No, that's not where you were going. First of all, how are we feeling? Gotta tell you, I'm still 100%. Wow. I'm not fatigued even a little bit. I don't know what's going on. Way to go, Eddie. I'm really scared, though, that come the overnight,

14:51I'm going to be screwed. How are you feeling? You know, it's really weird. I feel like I've just got on a boat, and I don't have seasickness yet, but I'm just starting to get those twinges of seasickness. I don't have it yet, but I'm like... Hmm, what was that feeling in my stomach? Yep. Oh, no. But it's that with the tired. Yeah. Like, replace seasickness with exhaustion, you know, slash tired. And I'm not tired yet, but I can feel it just starting to peak over the horizon. Now, you've got to realize, you guys, we've been on the air for over 12 hours.

15:52but we actually have longer than that to go. So the amount of time that we've been on the air, we actually have to do longer than that, left to go. That's brutal. Thanks for bringing us completely to the heart. I just wanted to let you guys know where we're at. I do it every year. Why is everybody acting like it's such a thing? That was awful. So we have that to look forward to. Okay. All right. Mikey Show. Hello. Hi, this is Peele and Krista, and I brought you guys apple pie from Julian, but I can't get in. What? We know this lovely gal. Colonel. We know you. You are a wonderful gal. We are going to let you in. Okay. Are you at the front door? I'm at the front door. Are you hot? Okay. Sean. Bobby Colonels will come and get you. Okay. All right, bye. Bye.

16:56A very sweet person. Good looking? I don't remember. I honestly don't remember. A very bad question to ask, though, because if they're not, which I don't remember, then what do you do? Then you defer to Sean. Well, yeah, you just got to say, no, it's ugly. If they are, they probably know it anyway. Well, you can't say that, though. It's not going to be a shot. They're not going to go, oh, no, I've gone my whole life thinking I was gorgeous, and now I just found out I'm... You know? You can't say that. Ugly. I was honest, though. I like it. Got a couple people we got to thank. You're welcome. You wish. We would like to say thank you to Fox 6 News, the sponsor of the 28-hour broadcast. We did ID at 6, didn't we? Yeah. Eddie, is that basically the idea? Or do I read this thing?

18:06All new Bones at 8 p.m. starring David Boreanis and Emily Deshnell. Deshnell? Oh, we should have given it to Sky. Oh, and you know what? You didn't say it right, but I let it go. David Burans? Do you mean David Burans? And Emily Deshnell? Solving the creepiest cases since the X-Files. Then at 9, TV's newest game show is also the biggest. This used to be the time that I would start. Hey, come on in. Come on in. Let me have you go over to Sky's microphone. Have a seat. Very sweet person. You've been wanting to do this for a long time, right? Yeah, she has. She's pretty cute, dude. Yeah, she is. Okay. Can't get here in the mornings because of work. Yeah. It's appropriate. What's your name, young lady? P1 Krista.

19:06Krista, I want to apologize for our pet, Sean. You're welcome. No worries. If you listen to the show on a consistent basis, you know that he is very different. It's our fault. If you have a dog that jumps on you every time you have guests over, it's your own fault. It's your own fault because what you don't do is you have to punish your pet. Or they will continue to do it. And we've gone past that point. You can't train him now. So the only choice we have is to put him to sleep. Only choice we have. We can't do it. We can't bring ourselves to do it because we love him. I'll do it. We can't bring ourselves to do it because we love him. But he is. I used to work at a vet. He's a bad dog. He's a bad, bad dog. So you also brought us Julian apple pies. That's really nice of you. Sounds so good. I have apple boysenberry and then regular apple in there, too. That's really nice of you. Yeah, they're pretty good. I'm not a big pie person myself, but most people love them. That's very nice. Well, thank you very much. Of course. Are you going to work tonight? No, I work in the mornings. That's why it's hard for me to get in in the mornings. Did you drive all the way from, where did you drive from? Well, I drove from Julian this morning, but Serrano Valley. Okay.

20:36And now you're on your way back to Julian. Yes. Do you get the show very good up there in Julian? Yes, actually. Yeah. It's not too bad. It's cool. That's great. All right, Krista. Well, we have to get back to business, but I wanted to bring you in and say thank you very much. It was very sweet of you to do. No problem. Very nice of you. You're a good P1. And I will be around. Thank you. Thank you, guys. Thank you very much, Krista. Thank you. She's a very nice person. She bought us Julian apple pies. We've got so much food here. She's so sweet. She's really nice. Yeah, real sweet. Okay, Sean. Could you use some pizza, though? Yeah, that sounds great. Could you use some pizza? Someone's going to bring some, you know, now. Like pepperoni? Absolutely. From where? I don't care. Round table? Sure. Oh, Eddie said pizza port. What's that all about? Oh, pizza port. I don't care. Eddie said that. I agreed with Ashley. Eddie just forwarded me an email.

21:38from a very important person here. This was not from you, Eddie? I don't know. I don't know what you're talking about. Didn't you send this to me? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Bob Bollinger, the big, big, big boss here, the general manager. What a phenomenal day of radio, among the best I've ever heard. You guys are amazing, proud, and privileged to be in business with you. Bob, I sure hope things work out. Stop it. It would be nice. Stop what? What did I? Stop what? Well, I know where you're going with it. You don't have a clue where I'm going. Yeah, you're going to start talking about contracts and then start joking about how other state kids want. Me and him are in the same book club. He didn't get the book this week. I'm trying to get the book to him. It's so rude to bring up contracts on the air.

22:53I would not have done what Skye just did, Mr. Bollinger. I'm really sorry about that. Stupid liar. I'm really, really sorry about that, Mr. Bollinger. You can take it up with her after the show. Yeah, we'll be off tomorrow morning at 10 a.m., sir, if you want to talk to her. She'll be available. Wow. Wow. Wow. I don't think anybody expected that to happen. Whoa, no way. Wow. Mel Gibson. Yeah. Yes. Wait. What are you talking about, Mel Gibson? He was doing an impression. It was Borat. What? Wow. Number nine. Number nine. Yeah. You're listening to the 28-hour Mikey Marathon. Brought to you by Fox 6 News. On KIOZ.

23:58San Diego's rock station, Rock 105.3. It takes place between 7 p.m. and 8 p.m. Hey, look at this. The Mikey Show back on at night. Oh, wow. Wow. Nice. That's right. Are we ready to do this thing? Ashley going up against Nolan. Oh, no, I thought we had news. Missy's son. How old did we say he is? Oh, he's still 12. Still 12 years old. All right. Is Nolan coming in here? This should be fun for me. I'm pulling for you. All right, Nolan. Thanks, B. Come on in here, man. Have a seat. Nolan, every time I see you, you're taller, man. Every time I see you. He's a P1, too. Yeah, you're getting a lot taller. Went to young man now. Next time I see you, you're going to be six feet tall before you know it, man. It's kind of cool. He's growing like a weed, Mikey. That's right, Sean. He's growing like a weed. Where's this?

25:06Where's your mom? There she is. Come in here, miss. I try to get miss to do crossovers with us and stuff on the air. Nolan, quickly. How come your mom doesn't do the crossover on the radio with us? I don't know either. No one knows. No one knows. Missy, how come you don't do crossovers with us when you come on the air? We don't care. Whenever. Come in whenever. Gorgeous Missy's looking. Yeah, Ashley, she really is. She's lost a ton of weight. Yeah, better than ever. Your mom's looking great. Missy, you do not take these compliments well. You're very uncomfortable when people say that. But, I mean, you've worked hard. You look beautiful. You've worked very hard at it. Stop it. She gets so uncomfortable. Why? Why? Mikey, break her down. Break her down, Mikey. Why? You're a gorgeous lady. Figure it out.

26:07What are we yelling about? I don't know. Are you ready for Ashley versus Nolan trivia? Let's see if Ashley is as smart as a 12-year-old. Yeah, we should explain what happened last year, too. Last year, we did the same thing. Missy brought her son. Missy's our midday DJ. She came in. She brought her son, Nolan. She's beautiful. Hell of a woman. Wow. She brought Nolan in last year, and Nolan wiped the mat with Ashley. Embarrassed Ashley. Hey, I mean, I wouldn't say that. If we're being honest, he embarrassed you. I wouldn't say that. Embarrassed you. Embarrassed to an 11-year-old. At the time he was 11 years old, he beat you. It was really close, and I was delirious. It was the opposite. It was the opposite of us. No, crazy delirious over here. Why were you delirious?

27:09Because, Nolan, I'd been on the air since 6 a.m. in the morning. No commercials, no music. He's a kid. Why are you yelling at me? I'm not yelling. At that time, we'd only been on 11 hours. You'd only been on 11 hours. Leave a kid alone. You really weren't even tired. You're going to make me cry. Don't do a bit. Don't make me cry. What a terrible thing to do to a young man. Sorry, Nolan. Little one. Alright, let's get started. Brutal. Absolutely brutal. Stop it, Eddie. First category is science and astronomy. Oh, come on. What do you mean, oh, come on? I hate those subjects. Skye, what level grade is this? What is it supposed to be about baking and monkeys? And popcorn. And popcorn. I'm all in. I actually got the majority of this trivia out of a fifth grade book. Ask. Ask. Is that true? Don't say that. Yeah, a couple of the things I, like, Googled and, like, you know, looked up. But, dude, I tried to make it extremely basic. What, Eddie? What, Eddie? Fifth grade level. I heard. Ashley, you ready? Yep. Eddie, who do I start with? Who do I ask? You can start with whichever you want and just go the opposite. Nolan, what is the largest planet in our solar system? Do you want me to write it down? I don't know. Stop showing off, Nolan. Just say it. Yeah, just say it. We'll just go back and forth. He's not showing off. Yeah, he is.

28:34How is he showing up by answering the question? He's answering the question. Write it in Spanish or put it in English. He's showing up. He's a little boy. Nolan, Nolan, Nolan, is Ashley about to make you cry? Yes. You're really an awful person, Ashley. I hate you. What an awful person you are. I really hate you. You do not, Eddie. Missy is hot. Okay, we get it. We get it. Wow. So, Nolan, what is the largest planet in our solar system? Write it or say it. You can say it. You can say it. All right, Jupiter. That's correct. I made that look easy. Someone's telling me the answer. Missy, no cheating. No helping your son. Nobody said a word. Oh, my God. You are unbelievable. Look at, Missy's now having to stand behind Nolan. No one's behind me helping me. Oh, that is so chicken-esque. You are brutal. I know. Really unreal. You are brutal. And that stands for, hey, Nolan, that stands for stew. That is so chicken stew. Yeah, chicken stew, man. That is so chicken stew of you. That is so chicken salad. All right. I can't even tell you. Try these chicken salad, no less. Ashley, you ready? Yes.

29:58If you're just tuning in, Ashley's going up against a 12-year-old and basic knowledge. Right, great. This is brutal. That's great. This is awesome. Ashley, what is the coldest planet in our solar system? Pluto. Oh, look at the big brains. Oh, she's doing more. For goodness sake, she can't do that, Missy. Missy, she can't. You can't say that. You can't say that. She just crotch-chopped a 12-year-old. You can't crotch-chop. A 12-year-old. I'm sorry. For goodness sake. How could you? How could you? One to one. Let's go. Eddie, shame on you. Stop. Nolan just said, how could you? Stop. He's doing a bit, and I'm not falling apart. He's not doing a bit. He's not. You're awful. You're an awful person. All right. All right. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Wow, Missy. Now, I want everybody in the listening audience to follow along with this one, okay? The next category is...

31:02English comprehension. Ah, this is my specialty. And this is the reason that I gave Nolan the piece of paper. And, Ashley, you can take notes as well if that will help you in this. You can take notes. Thank you, Skye. Absolutely. This is my specialty. I'm an English minor. Very minor. Okay. Rude. All right. P1s, as you're listening in your car, try to kind of follow along with us. It's kind of fun. English and comprehension. Ashley versus a 12-year-old. Listen to the following description of how to make tacos and then be prepared to answer some questions. Here we go. Prepare the tomato, lettuce, and cheese. Set them aside. Next, in a large pan, heat the oil and brown the onions. Add the hamburger or chicken to the onions. Stir over medium heat until the meat is browned. Add a pinch of cumin. Heat the taco shells according to the package directions. Fill the taco shells with meat, tomato, lettuce, cheese, and hot sauce. Serve with plenty of napkins. You're listening to the English comprehension portion of the test. Ashley's furiously writing things down with her chest almost completely revealed to all of us. To a 12-year-old. That's why my head's going this way. Okay. He's Sean. That's really weird. All right.

32:35I will now begin asking questions. Nolan. I got this one. Good luck, Noel. Hey, Nolan. Better know your stuff. What meat can you use instead of hamburger? Chicken. That is correct. Ashley. In your face, Ashley. Yeah, what he said. Ashley. Okay. What three items do you prepare first? Tomatoes. A lettuce. A cheese. A cheese? Did you have to say it like the Tootsie Roll owl? Yeah, I did, Mikey. Cheese. Yeah, I did, Mikey. Thank you for noticing that. Is that correct? It's called being original with the answer. That is correct. Nolan, what do you add a pinch of? Cuban. That is correct. Oh, look at that. On fire. Ashley. Yup.

33:51What should you serve the tacos with plenty of? TLC. My chest. Shut up. I'm wearing a low cut shirt. So what? Inappropriate. You're inappropriate. What was that? I don't know. You're inappropriate. I'm wearing a low cut shirt. Oh, my God. Plenty of? Guys, I just want to say for the record, Ashley does not know what plenty is. I'm going to make a bold statement. What are you talking about? I'm going to make a bold statement. What does this bold statement entail? Ashley does not know what you serve the tacos with plenty of. I do know. What is it? Plenty of seasoning.

34:53That is incorrect. Can I answer that? Yes, you can. I took notes so I know it's napkins. That's right. Just threw a pen at him. No, of course there is. Of course there is. Fine, give them to him. That's fine. Cheat. Cheat? He knew it. You didn't. The next category is social studies. Social studies. Gold rush. Gold rush? I didn't learn about this since the fifth grade. But you did learn about it. In the fifth grade, do you know how much positive? Oh, no. There's a 12-year-old. There's a 12-year-old in the room. I love weed. Unbelievable. Nolan, what year did the California gold rush begin?

36:02Jeez. I know, it's tough, huh? 1848. That is correct. Wow. He's so smart. He's 12. That was kind of amazing, actually. All right, come on, Ashley. You're smart. Ashley, what is the common name for the gold-colored mineral often mistaken for gold? Oh, no. She's got that look. She's got that facial expression that means, like, who would ever know that? In this case, it means, watch as I squeeze these together. That's what you were doing. In this case, it means, guys. Do that. So sad.

37:09I'm going to die of laughter here. Okay, Nolan. Um, copper? Fifth grade, bro. That is incorrect. Fifth grade, bro. That is incorrect. One is colored copper and the other is colored gold. I didn't mistake one for the other. I know this. What is it, Nolan? Another steel? No, it's iron. Fool's gold. That is correct. That is correct. No, this isn't funny anymore. Like, can you not? Because it's making me look really bad. Ashley's right. It's funnier. No. It's funny for the listeners. That's right. Hey, Nolan, you're embarrassing me over here. Is that a bad thing? The next question. Kid, dude. This is it. This is the last one. Now, with this last one, you guys are going to have to figure out this math problem on paper. This happened last year, and he beat me.

38:10That is true. Damn it. Here we go. It's a word problem. I hate this. I am only going to read this once, so pay attention. In the first year of production, a play sells 1,572 tickets. In its second year, it sells 1,753 tickets. In its third year, it sells 152 less than in its second year. How many tickets are sold in three years? Are you sure? I'm really going to have to squeeze my chest together on this one. Shut up! Ten seconds. Nine. Four hundred seconds left. It's not about who does it faster, it's about who does it right.

39:53I got this one. You're going down, buddy. Ashley telling a 12-year-old he's going down. Totally appropriate. I got it. You got it? I got it. All right. Ashley, I would like for Boston Rob to come into your studio and pick up your answer on paper. Sky, you may collect Nolan. It'll take me a little while. Hold on to that mickey. That's three studios you got to go to. And then I got to walk real slow. Here I come. Ashley wrote 4,926. Nolan wrote 4,926. The answer is 4,926. Wow. Good job, guys. I had no idea. However, Nolan got more questions right. Nolan beat Ashley 7-3. Oh!

41:16You're supposed to be older and smarter. But you understand that this came from a fifth grade textbook and Nolan's 12, closer to the age where you study. Nolan didn't miss a question. Not one. I mean, the kid's pretty smart, but you have to understand. Kid didn't miss a question. Where I'm coming from. Fantastic. Nolan, good job. Once again, you're the champ. That was so hurtful. That was so hurtful of you to say to me. I'm sorry, but I really hate you. Going through puberty, he's going to go with a girl. Listen, Nolan. Again, proving how smart he really is. Listen, Nolan. In life, things are going to swing your way sometimes. Sometimes they aren't. And I got the vote at the end. It could have very well been Sky. So Sky was very good. What are you going to do?

42:25She's great. Next year, probably be me and her again, right? Well, you just got the guys to vote for you. Oh. Wow. Kid's not so cute anymore, Mike. Okay, come on now. No, now I think Ashley was a lot smarter. No, she wasn't. Come on. She wasn't and isn't. Turned my whole opinion around. No, no, no. Come on. No, good shot, Nolan. All right, Nolan. All right, Nolan. Nice. Very nice. Very nice. High five. High five. And how about that Missy, huh? Yes. All right, Eddie. Come on. Well, hello. Super hot. Well, hello. Why won't you talk with us? She hates it. No, she hates it. I don't know. She hates it when people compliment her. But she won't even ever come on the air with us. She doesn't come on the air with us. She doesn't want to do the crossover with us when we're getting off the air and she's coming on. And then when she comes into the 28-hour show, she doesn't talk with us. But at the same time, her and Nolan listen religiously.

43:25Huge ones. Huge. I don't know. But why do they hate us? No, I don't think it's that. I don't know. It's so unusual. Dude, that sucked. I can't believe you didn't get fool's gold, Ash. Dude, I swear. Fifth grade, man. That was a long time ago. But now when you heard fool's gold? Yeah, it rang a bell. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, it rang a bell. Oh, no. Yeah, in your face. There it is. Mikey Show. Man. How are you, buddy? Good, man. Oh, no. That felt weird. What's going on? The 28-hour show. I'm fully in support of you fellas and ladies enjoying the show. I've been on now for 12 hours, and I'm happy to see you. We've been doing this 13 hours, 20 minutes. 13 hours and 20 minutes is a score.

44:24I'm with you for the next... What is this? The next 15 hours? Christ's sake. Is that how long we have? 15 hours left? Oh, it's only 15 hours. Don't even worry about it. It's less than two shifts. Thank you. Appreciate the call. Mikey Show, hello. Mikey, this is P1 Diggler. What's up, Diggler? Hey, what's up with some yin and yang tonight? We'll get you some yin and yang. You just stay put there, kiddo. Mikey Show. Hey. How's it going? I just wanted to say, Mike, your show rocks. Thank you, dude. Audience changes at nighttime. You can tell. It takes on a whole different sound. And it's so funny because as I was answering calls right there, there was something so oddly familiar about it to me. I went, people sound very familiar to me. And I went, ah, nighttime audience. Suddenly I remembered.

45:24In an hour and a half, we're going to be watching the TV show Lost. Yes. Are we doing that in the conference room? Yep. Yeah? And also, we're going to be viewing Star Trek The Wrath of Khan tonight. Nerd alert. At 10 o'clock. Star Trek 2, shut up, B-Rod. B-Rod. Oh, man. Oh, no. After Star Trek 2 The Wrath of Khan, we're going to watch The Wizard of Oz. That is going to be great. Midgets right on. Also, tonight we are going to be playing Who Can Sean Beat Now? We're going to be doing P1 Pop Culture Quiz. Oh, well, hello. Tomorrow morning at approximately 3 a.m., Tom Cruise will be stopping by. Oh, that's awesome. Tom Hanks will be in studio. What? Nicole Kidman should be calling in. Awesome. I heard Britney Spears was going to give her first interview. Is with us. Yeah, I mean.

46:27Kevin Federline is performing. Bravo, Eddie. Bravo, Eddie. Yeah, K-Fed's going to come in and do a line with us. Yeah, Jerry Garcia's bones are going to play guitar right here in the studio. I'd stay up 48 hours for that. Let me tell you something. There is nothing like the sleep that you do finally get to when the 28-hour show is done, but it takes a while. When we get home, there is a process of decompressing. And when Sean and I finally crawl into bed together, let me tell you something. Curl up and spoon. It is such a, you know. Such a. Relief to finally be home, huh, Sean? And, you know, more than just the relief portion of it, there's a particular musk. Oh. That permeates. Wait a minute. I just had it. I turned his microphone off. I knew that was going to get really ridiculous. You started it. Yeah. Yeah, I know. But, you know.

47:29This whole talk of musk, you know. It's like a different place I didn't want to go. That's so weird. Mikey, you Big Spoon? Yes, B-Rod. I'm Big Spoon. And I'm Little Spoon. That's cute. You guys love us. Oh, wow. The love. What? You guys can't spoon? Yeah, like that's gay? So weird. Yeah. I guess a six foot tall, 340 pound guy. 45. Spooning with a midget fat Mexican is somehow weird or gay or whatever. This society is just so ridiculous. Really ridiculous in its regimented rules. It's like everyone is so hung. Up on labels, man. Right, right. Like, hey, people. What's going on, Scott? I don't know, dude. I'm just enjoying the ride. Yeah. A couple of mammoth men are just trying to spoon around here. Hey, you know what? Four moobs want to get together and do their thing. But, oh, no, society's got to put a label on it. Boom. Dang. Whatever, man.

48:54Whatever. You don't have to flip off the microphone, Sean. That's what I think of you and your rules, America. Right. Got really odd. Libertarian party all the way. They don't judge. That guy, Rosie O'Donnell, will probably fight for your cause. That's right. That dude is so trying to get rid of all those rules. She's a woman. Mikey Show. I actually was wrong about the planet Pluto being the planet. I know everyone. Oh, what are they saying? Well, because remember, Pluto was recategorized as a dwarf planet. But all the textbooks, the textbooks haven't been changed yet. I based it off the textbooks. Thanks for trying to bring me down. Mikey Show. Thanks a lot. Hello.

49:52Hey, this is P1 Agitator. What's up, P1 Agitator? Oh, interesting. Wait a sec. Hey, I actually missed the second question, too, because Pluto isn't a planet anymore. We know. We know, right? Mikey, why do they do that? Why? I'll tell you. I have an answer. It's because it elevates them. It's like, hey, I lost to a 12-year-old. Hey, you don't need to pile on when it grows down. Yeah. Hey. Hey. Hey. You don't need to put labels on two men who just want to cuddle. No. Thank you, Sean. But I'm staying. Crazy. Insane world we live in. It really is ridiculous. It is. When two hulking men can't climb into a one-man sleeping bag. Just go through this. And watch DirecTV in the dark. Odd. With a rain machine noisemaker on. You know? No, I don't. That's what it's come to. Like, that's gay. Why can't one man breathe his hot breath on the back of another man's neck while watching Food Network? Really, is that gay?

51:27It's to the point where a couple of really good friends can't put on velvet robes with ascots. Don't like where this is going. And feed each other. with plastic spoons. Okay. Plastic word. Some Dannon yogurt. Oh, that is awkward. That is weird. Yeah, that is an awkward visual. You know, it's like that, right? I do know. I do know, Mikey. Okay, we get it. You guys have been oppressed. We get it. Society's keeping you down. We know. Yes, Scott, yes. And you know what? We're going to make sure that everyone knows about it. I think you've done that over the last 20 minutes. I think we got it loud and clear. We got it, Sean. Let it all out. We got it, dude. You know, it's like a guy can't even wear a shower cap anymore. And that's all. Oh, my. That is very weird. All right.

52:45We have to try to get back on the schedule. We do. No, we do. Yeah, right, Mike. Guy can't hold another guy and give him butterfly kisses anymore. Too far, Sean. I like it. Not far, no. Okay. I have too much information in front of me. Too much. Give me. I think we're starting to get a little loopy, everyone. I don't. Just for the record. Should we do a little puss rock? Yeah. That's a nice sandwich, James. I would love that. Speaking of games. Load it up. It should be loaded up for you. If you go page down, it should be all there for you. If not all. Yeah, where's my theme? There it is. It should be right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Get it. Go. Come on. Let's do this. Yeah, let's get it. The way the puss rock jukebox works is we will play it that only guys can play.

54:17And you got to know Wuss Rock songs, you know, songs that they would play on Kixie. You know, we're talking about your Foreigner, your Phil Collins, your REO Speedwagon, that kind of stuff. Maybe Michael Bolton. Oh, yeah. Daddy-like. Now, I don't... All this gay talk got me really excited. It's not gay talk! I mean... It's too heteros! Okay, I met Mad Love, sorry. My bad. See, Eddie, that's the deal. It's two straight guys just trying to act normal, but people pigeonhole it into some category called gay. Listen, fellas, I get it, and I want to join in. All right. How do I get involved? Bring a six-pack of coolers. Hey, Rob, I tag team you. That's right. You're my partner. Make this happen.

55:14I quit this bitch. Okay. Just bring some Bud Light and some Red Man. You've got it. Red Man. I got some Big League Chew in my front pocket. Oh, I thought you were just happy to see it. Dig away. That'd be gay. All you need is some Lumberjack flannel and a pair of Wranglers. I'm just going to pop in this KD Lang CD, guys. That's not a KD Lang CD. It isn't? All right, we got people lined up ready to do this. Listen, I feel like we've been on the air 20 hours. Nah. I got my chaps on and I'm ready to hide. Okay. Let's do this. I like it. Let's do this. Yeah. Let's get started. P1 Mike, are you there? I'm here. All right, we're going to play you a song, okay? Okay. And it's a clip. And when the clip stops, then you have to take over, okay? Okay.

56:22All right. And you will then be judged by Eddie, Sky, and Sean as to whether or not you did good. If you don't know the lyrics to the song when you have to take over, you better be creative. Gotcha. And I don't mean saying, I don't know the words to this song. That won't work. No. You almost vomited there. I don't know the words to this song. You ready? Ready. Here we go. Never you will know. As long as I know, coming straight from the heart. Eddie. Wow. I would personally like to invite this guy over to my one-man bathtub for a midnight swim. Awesome job. Thumbs up. Okay. And Skye. Yeah, I definitely believe this gentleman was relating to everything you guys were saying for the last 20 minutes. He's extremely homosexual.

57:46Okay. Finally, Sean. Yeah, dude, I mean, it's obvious the guy likes to host beard bumping parties, and I think that he is 100% gay. There you go. You are a winner. I think you probably want tickets to see the Tenacious D movie. I have no idea. Hang on the line.