All shows / 28 Hour Show 2004 - Rock 105.3
28 Hour Show - 2004 - Part 6
2004
28 Hour Show 2004 - Rock 105.3KIOZRock 105.3
Star Wars: Return of the Jedi commentaryEwoksGeorge Lucas's movie changesIncest jokesRadio marathon broadcastingListener feedbackCrude humorDarth VaderC 3POMovie criticismPop culture referencesRadio show banter
The Mikey Show hosts continue their 28-hour marathon by providing live, often crude, commentary on *Star Wars: Return of the Jedi*. Co-hosts Eddie, Sean, Rebecca, Skye, and Walter, along with Blunder and Gutenberg, mock various aspects of the film, from C-3PO's impracticality in a forest and the Ewoks' fighting abilities to Luke and Leia's incestuous kiss and Darth Vader's unmasked appearance. They frequently criticize George Lucas's special edition changes and engage in running gags about "the Empire's dental plan" and comparing characters to real-world figures like Donald Trump. The show concludes the movie segment by taking calls from listeners who watched along, before transitioning to the next film in their marathon, *Karate Kid*, and setting up an interview with David Draymond from Disturbed.
What happened, in order
C-3PO's Forest Folly
The hosts mock the impracticality of C-3PO navigating a forest, comparing it to taking a handicapped person through rough terrain.
Ewoks: Lame or Loveable?
Eddie expresses strong disdain for Ewoks, while "the girls in the back" (Rebecca) find them cute, leading to crude jokes about their hygiene.
Ewoks "Gang Rape" Joke
A crude joke about Ewoks leads to one of the female co-hosts, possibly Rebecca, expressing offense for the first time in the movie.
Rebecca's First Star Wars
The hosts reveal they are in a 28-hour marathon and that Rebecca is watching *Return of the Jedi* for the very first time, noting her unimpressed reaction.
C-3PO as Police Academy Sound Effects
The hosts compare C-3PO's "magic" over the Ewoks to a sound effects guy from the *Police Academy* movies, prompting Blunder to be called in to laugh.
Luke and Leia's Incestuous Kiss
The hosts discuss and make crude jokes about the scene where Luke and Leia kiss, knowing they are siblings, with Leia later quipping "Tastes like incest."
The Empire's Dental Plan
A running gag develops about the Empire having a terrible dental plan, with jokes about bad teeth and retainers in space.
"It's a Trap!" and Lucas's Pets
The hosts mock Admiral Ackbar's famous line and speculate that George Lucas's creative inspiration for characters like the Ewoks came from his household pets.
Disappointment with Unmasked Vader
The hosts express strong disappointment and mock the appearance of Darth Vader's unmasked face, comparing it to baby powder and a "vagina on the skull."
Criticism of Lucas's Special Edition Changes
The hosts voice their disdain for George Lucas's later additions and changes to the movie, especially the cartoon elements and the inclusion of Hayden Christensen at the end.
End of Jedi, Marathon Continues
The movie concludes, and the hosts celebrate finishing the first film of their 28-hour marathon, immediately transitioning to the next segment.
Listener Calls: Movie Commentary Feedback
The show opens the phone lines to take calls from listeners who watched *Return of the Jedi* along with them, gathering feedback on the experience.
People mentioned
EddieSeanRebeccaSkyeWalterBlunderGutenbergMikeAlexP1 Market SClintDanaHan SoloC-3POR2-D2EwoksLuke SkywalkerPrincess LeiaChewbaccaDarth VaderEmperor PalpatineGeorge LucasHayden ChristensenMark HamillCarrie FisherNatalie PortmanJohn PopperDavid DraymondSlashDick CheneyLiberaceLowry MayJeff ProbstDonald Trump
7,840 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
Last one there is on the bottom. Pull out. I don't want to get pregnant. I have my sea foam sabers. That's the part I most like. off. You know, my little boy haircut looks a lot better scruffy. What the hell look back
on? What are you thinking? Han Solo, though. He was all man. General Solo, somebody's coming. Oh, it's just Liberace. How much of a pain must it have been to take C-3PO through a friggin' forest? Well, dude, R2. Yeah, no heels. No kidding. It's like taking the handicap. It's like taking the handicap through a forest.
Yeah, just go over branches and poison ivy. I'm sure that's easy. Rocks, boulders. Let me take my little wheelchaired friend through the forest. Very handy. And he moves at a swift pace of .2 miles an hour. Everybody, this is the moment in time where all Star Wars fans collectively gasp. Here's where it was lost. The end of the universe as we know it. Dude, I'm not kidding, Eddie.
That looks like your little dog back home. I'm out! I'll call the girls in the back so happy with the Ewoks. Yeah, the girls in the room love the Ewoks. Oh, come on. Ewoks are lame. Come on. That's right. Best part ever. I'm not going to hurt you. Midgets should only be in porn. Throughout the movie, I will tell you what the Ewoks are thinking. Thank you.
Oh, no. Looks like I'm stuck here. But I have my helmet. If you didn't have all that turd stuck in your Ewok fur. Yeah, do you think they're like cats after they go to the bathroom? They clean themselves? Yeah, it's like a litter box. They scratch into it. That's right. It's kibble.
Great, a rice cake. Thanks. Yeah, that's real effing. It's a stale, bitch. Yeah, that's real effing good. Tastes like my balls. Which I'm very familiar with. Yeah. Which I lick all the time. It's a hat. It's not a hat, it's a helmet. I'm not stupid. It's a hat. I'm an Ewok, not a dumbass. You're a dittery little thing, aren't you? Smells like dumb bitch.
Yep, sure is. Honey, this is the first time you've seen this, right? You think those little stupid things are cute? Yeah, those are cute. Oh, that's brutal. Look at Sean. Smells like dumb bitch is the funniest line he's heard. Jesus. Have another Viking in, will ya? Where was this film?
Freeze! Come on, get up. It was actually filmed on another planet. Okay, you're right. Take her back to base. Yes, sir. I want to have a little Kobe time. What the? Okay. Good thing you knocked him out with that stick. Even though he has armor on. Right. Full body armor. Took a stick.
Yeah. Look it, he's down. He's down for the count. Right. Let's get out of here. Shoot him! Later this planet of teddy bears is going to take everybody on. Yeah, it's true. This way, bitch. We're going to gang rape you. Oh, hey. The Ewoks don't talk like that. Yes, the guy knows the Ewoks don't talk like that. They don't gang rape. As a matter of fact, she's really offended. It's the first time she's been offended through the whole movie. Hey, Ewoks don't gang rape. Oh, sorry, my bad.
They don't gang rape. My bad. Darth would gangrene. The other meeting with Dick Cheney. Look at that window, by the way. Queer eyes came in. Let's do something in a web. I told you to remain on the command team. What a lonely job. Just staring out the window like that. In this space. Yes, I know. My son is with him. Like the hydraulics on the chair, kind of going out a little bit.
You felt yourself. This effing thing? Your feelings of this matter are clear, Lord Vader. They are clear, my master. Then you must go to the century moon and wait for me. Why does a guy on black gotta call somebody else the master? He will come to me. This movie's racist. I have foreseen it. His compassion for you will be his undoing. He will come to you, and then you will bring him before me. And he will shoot for me, and then we'll be before each other.
Forget it. Dude, the helmet's sweet. You need one of these. Man, and Leia calls them hats. I like how they're all dressed in camouflage, but they have a gold shiny guy walking around. Because that's not going to attract anybody. And a white handicap droid. Look at the sun hits 3PO.
They're going to be like, oh, there they are. Yeah, look, the sun. Hello. Later, Sky. Sky's out. What, Chewie? Where is she going? The bed? I probably... She's got to drop one. What, Chewie? Dude, what is that? It's like the back of JFK's head. No. Had to be said, dude. Yeah. Had to be said. Had to be said. It's just a dead animal, Chewie.
Chewie, wait, don't! No, it's Cobain. Oh, my God. Nice work. You fag-looking. Great, Joey. Great. Always thinking with your stomach. You take it easy. Let's just figure out a way to get out of this thing. I bet this was a fun scene to do 25 takes of. Now is not the time for a reach-around, Luke. Yeah. Damn, Swiss army knife of droids. RT, you have a nail file?
Look at that bull. Uh-oh. Here we go. The movie goes bad. Dude. Dude, check out the roster, Ewok. Yeah, no kidding. Hey, look at that guy. You know he's smoking out. It's huge. You want to find yourself in a row, please? They have autism in space, too. Have you seen Blunder's baby pictures?
Hey, point that thing someplace else. I have never heard that before. Ladies and gentlemen, Survivor of Vanuatu. All right, don't. You'll be all right. Chewy, give him your crossbow. Oh, midgets and fur. Now I see everything. Oh, my goodness. They're fascinated by gay robots. Yeah, the Ewoks do.
- Is that Joaquin Phoenix in the background there? - The hair lip? - Do you understand anything they're saying? - Oh yes, Master Luke. Remember that I am fluent in over six million forms of community. What are you telling them? Hello, I think. I could be mistaken. They're using a best primitive dialect. By the way, I think it's important to let people know. We're doing a 28-hour marathon right now.
That's why you hear the Mikey show on air. Yeah. We don't get off until 10 a.m. And get us out of this. We're watching Return of the Jedi. After this, we're doing Karate Kid, which I've never seen. Programming to impersonate a dad. You're brutal. Who are you? Would those spears even pierce the skin? Yeah, no kidding. I hope you're so scared. Well, they're obviously made of plastic, so... My mistake. It's an old friend, no matter what. That's the parade of careers going down the tubes.
You know, this is kind of a bummer. Why? This is the first Star Wars movie Rebecca has ever seen, and it's Jedi. I'm shocked she's not in love with this. She did think the Muppets were cute But she's kind of giggling
At the goofiness of the whole thing Not a good one I need a sock Do we have to go get them? Alright The Ewoks No, it's alright Because I want to smoke a cigarette anyway What? The middle of the movie Ewoks are nuts Okay, fine What did he say? I'm rather embarrassed, General Solo, but it appears you are to be the main course at a banquet in my pocket. It's time for the show to get funny, everyone. Hey, Sean.
Here we go. Sean. Isn't that about like you? Got rid of the dead weight. Have fun. Leia. Leia. Your Royal Highness. But these are my friends. My brother wants to sleep with me. 3PO, tell them they must be set free. And Han wants to watch. Chewie can't break out of those. Give me a break.
Somehow I got the feeling that didn't help us very much. 3PO, tell them if they don't do as you wish. You'll be coming in and use your magic. Seriously, Emily, you are horrible. I know your face got jacked up in that car accident, but did your axle ability get broken too? God. Make out. You see, Master Luke, they didn't believe me. Just as I said that, would you?
Skye, when you're high, do you imagine stuff like this? Shut up. Well, I don't know. She does stuff like that. Levitates.
It's all right, everybody. This is not funny. Do it. Do it. This is a dope microwave. A couple of Pop-Tarts in here. How's everybody doing?
Everybody all right back there? All right, just checking. Is it almost all right? No, Becca. Just kidding. So let me get this straight, dude. C-3PO is now the sound effects guy from the police academy movies. Hey, C-3PO, do a helicopter. Seriously. Now he's beatboxing? Dog barking in the distance. That's Gutenberg's going to come running in any second.
He's blundered. He would laugh at these jokes. God dang it. Blunder, come in here and laugh at my jokes. That's funny. Gutenberg, nothing for Gutenberg. Thank you. Blunder's just walking in his boxers. This is disgusting. You're looking good, Blunder. That's funny.
I knew you would appreciate that. I do. You guys think Chewie has an Ewok fetish? Who doesn't? He likes spinners. That's why they breed Ewoks like that. Becca may be related to an Ewok. But you're so small. You're teeny. Why don't you be so offended? You're cute. You're adorable. That's all I'm saying. She's like the Mexican hairless of Ewoks. There you go.
I like that. That'll work. Short help's better. No help at all. Sorry. You got my leg. What a dude. He says the scouts are going to show us the quickest way to the shield generator. Good. How far is it? Here we go. He's got more supplies, too. Try and get her weapons back. Uh-huh. Go, my freedom. Hurry up, will ya? I haven't got all day. Oh. Ribshot.
Luke, what's wrong? I'm super horny. Do you remember your mother? Your real mother? Just a little bit. She died when I was very young. Natalie Portman dies? No. Oh, thanks for ruining the next movie, bitch. That sucks. Ruined it all. Hey, she took my seat. She was very beautiful. Ow, ow, ow. But sad. Oh, God. Did someone just fart a beer? Get out of here.
You make me want to wretch. I never knew. Sean, when I left, did you say, now it's time for it to get funny? Yes, he did. I don't know what you're talking about. Well, catch me up on everybody's lines. Okay. Sean should have had three by now, so. That'd be nice. He's come for me. He can feel when I'm near. That's why I have to go. As long as I stay, I'm endangering the group and our mission here. I have to face him.
And your heterosexuality. I think you're hot. Cut. Makeup. Can we do something with that grill? There's more It won't be easy for you to hear it Carrie Fisher's like seriously I mean I can't deal with it Luke don't talk that way You have a power I don't understand And could never have You're wrong Leia You have that power too
And Luke you also have a butt on your chin The force is strong in my family My father has it. I thought it was a dimple, but it farted about five minutes ago. You have an ass where your face should be. Yes. It's you, Lyle.
What is woven into her head? I know. It's him. Then why did you make out with each other If they knew they were brother and sister Don't get me wrong, that's hot Later Sky Sky had a pepperoncini accident That's hot - But why must you confront him? - Because there is good in him, I felt it.
He won't turn me over to him. - Is it Terry Cloth? - I can save him, I can turn him around. - Dude, Luke's outfit, seriously. - It's very comfortable. - I have to try. Yeah, it's super absorbent. They made out again! Oh, my God! They're making out again! Oh, it's so hot! Strap it on. Is anything cool going to happen in this movie yet? Shut up, Walter. I actually agree. Hey, what's going on? Amy, any second now. Nothing.
I just want to be alone for a little while. I just made out with my brother. Tastes like incest I can't tell She is nowhere near as hot with that hairstyle I agree He's getting pissed Fine Albeit Eddie's playing poker Alright Look
Sorry I still want to do it I'm screwed up I feel bad I'm sorry Just whatever you do Don't say hold me And we'll be cool I said don't say hold me No She did Damn it Stupid bitch God I hate holding Chicks say that Just hold me What does that do? You're not actually holding No You're like You don't have to like Pick them up
Yeah, right. Just say, hug me. Right. Which is still stupid. Yeah. It is. Put your arms around me for like 20 seconds. Guys aren't allowed to say, just blow me. Right. Which would be cool. Seriously. He sent me just a little bit. Eddie, I can't believe you have not asked the girl
to your right to sit on her lap yet. He denied that I believe there may be more of them, and I request permission to conduct a further search of the area. And plastic surgery. He was armed only with this. A flashlight. Dildo. Dildo. Conductor on high. Dura cells or the bunny? And it's been used. So I smell. I know, Father. So, you have accepted the truth.
Look at Luke. Was anybody wondering what Danny Pantaro did after Hussmas? No, how dare you. It no longer has any meaning for me. It is the name of your true self you've only forgotten. I know there is good in you. The Emperor hasn't driven it from you fully. How many packs of foundation did they go through? That was why you couldn't destroy me enough. Putting together Mark Hamill. You won't give me to your emperor now. They're like, we called now. Kill him. Do it.
Kill him. I see you have constructed a new lightsaber. I went on eBay. Your skills are complete. What's up, Sky? Indeed, you are powerful, as the Emperor has foreseen. What did you say? Are you mocking me? Come with me. I did Corvette Summer. Only one once thought as you do. You don't know the power of the dark side.
If Luke is his son, why is one nine feet tall and one five feet tall? genetics if that is your destiny search your feelings father you can't do this i feel the conflict within you let go of your consequence it is speaking of feeling son is that a lightsaber in your pocket or the emperor will show you the truth my son is so gay i am so embarrassed Wrong.
Master Bader is my only master. In space, we have a policy, Luke. Don't ask. Don't tell. I wish you were aborted. Fine. Goodbye, cockhead. Those red lights do in the front of you. I wondered that, too. Are they serving any purpose?
Yeah, like, who's coming around to check those? Okay, hold still. Yep, still working. Need to check the vitals. You're looking good, kid. Keep on trucking. The main entrance to the control bunker is on the far side of that landing platform. Oh, like you know. This isn't going to be easy. Plumber ass. Don't worry. What's on that utility? Look at the thing around Chewy's neck. What does that do? Ammo?
For what? For the crossbow? For the crossbow that shoots energy holes. Right. He's got to have battery packs. He's got 95 battery packs wrapped around him. He's never used one. Admiral, we're in for the laundry. Anybody need their laundry done? Mira Mesa in the house.
Mando Cal Crispy Chicken reported for duty. Don't worry, my French down there. I don't speak your crazy language, boy. Translation, is Thursday okay? Don't worry, Sulu. I got it under control. Damn! I asked for light starch, bitch! Alright, stand by. I think an hour later, I want another co-pilot. Oh, that was a lost line, dude.
Thanks. Thanks. Oh. Jeez. That was awesome. Back door. Good idea. Back door? Hell yeah. Yeah, I think we did. There's only a few guards. This shouldn't be too much trouble. That is my Lhasa Apso. I'm not kidding. Seriously, dude. It is. That is your dog back home. I'm not kidding.
You had me, and hello. It's gone and found something from a rash. Oh, no. There goes our surprise attack. So was Han the only... This is a serious question. Was Han the only one that could understand Chewbacca? Stop him! That is a... Okay. So let me get this straight, Lucas. Now the Ewok can fly the speed or two. Oh, well. Right.
Not bad for a little furball. There's only one left. You stay here. We'll take care of this. Why was he always on the edge of, like, anger and... Everything pissed him off. You stay here. Effort. Stupid. Yeah, I'm buying it. Die. Die. Die. Oh, it's the old tap-em-on-the-shoulder-and-run trick, huh? Gets him every time.
Oh, I'm so stupid. I fell for it. He didn't even pull out his blastery. Nothing. He's, oh, damn it. I told you. I don't think that trick's going to work again. You never know. Now, how big was the death star? The moon size or smaller? What are we talking here in terms of actual size?
Big enough to have an elevator. First floor, career in the toilet department, everybody out. This is the new Ikea they're walking through. Ikea 2020. It's a Costco. How big everything is. Oh, it's the emperor. Where's your gay daughter? I want to meet her.
You'll no longer need those. Yeah, but they were really cool bracelets. Guys, leave us. Those unis have got to be hot. Holy cow. Horrible case of jaundice. It is. Oh, man. Master. See, my eyes don't get that bad. It really looked like that my first day at Betty Ford. You won't convert me as you did my father. Oh, no.
My young Jedi. Bye, Michelle. You will find that it is you who are mistaken. Was rude. In the middle of something. Beck is like, I've had three beers. I'll move in for the kill. He's a light singer. A Jedi's weapon Looks like a flashlight Dude, that is Skye's eyes right now Look at her John, look at those Exactly Oh my god, give me a break
Soon I'll be dead With you with me I smoke the good stuff Apparently no dentistry in space Yeah, they have a horrible dental plan on the Death Star. Pretty bad. Yeah, the Empire's dental plan is brutal. It's Clear Channel's dental plan. The Empire's dental plan apparently is in England. I hate my retainer. I just don't like to wear it. It makes me look nerdy.
No, I have to look evil. It's not an evil retainer. A bear on the sanctuary moon. A walking into a trap. As is your rebel fleet. It was I who allowed the Alliance to know the location of the shield generator. It is quite safe from your pitiful... God darn, that is a spitting image of Lowry May as the CEO. Dude, she's got a point. I'm afraid...
Oh, do you have to mock me? You don't have to be so smug. Yeah, sarcastic. Oh, you're so cool. Oh, my penis helmet will help me. Everybody gets knocked out really easy. Yeah, it's just one slap and you're done. And it don't matter if you have armor on or not. No.
You get hit, you're done. Exactly. Hey guys, do you realize we're still going to be on the air in 10 and a half hours? Oh, I don't want to hear you right now. 10 and a half hours. That is a big-ass planet.
All the wings are put in. Wedge! Wedge, the only other guy, other than the main character, appears all three positions. Yeah, I thought that would... I see the guy from Empire that goes, I found him. Blah, blah, blah. No. No, that's a different dude. We've got to be able to get some kind of reading on that shield up or down. Well, how could they be jamming us if they don't know? What do you mean this shirt needs pressing? I just... We're coming. Did you say the king power is extra spicy? Sucker ass.
We're in the reading. Are you sure? Hold on. Hold 45. Hold on. Take a pace of action. Green group. Stay close to holding check at the D-shirt. We have any new ships? It's a 3-7. It's a trap. Seriously, picture Lucas, like, at home, looking at his kids' pets. Dude. He's like, all right, Lassa Obso. Right, right. Lizard, cool. There's too many of them. Uh-oh. Bad driver. Don't wait to attack speed.
Draw the flag. Copy this. Later, Clint. Later, Clint. Later, Clint. Goodbye, brother. BC and Clint. Dope. See you, dude. I don't blame you, dude. Thanks for the pizza. I wish I could go. From here, you will witness the final destruction of the Alliance. Yeah, let's get some pizza. Yeah, yeah. You should be ordering a pizza at home, too. That's where the start. You want that? You want your... No.
No, I want to press that yellow button right there. What does that do? Take your Jedi weapon. Use it. This is actually a beautiful view of you. Have you seen this, Emperor? Give in to your anger. With each passing moment you make yourself more my servant. No. I'll be your interior decorator, but not your servant. It is your destiny.
You, like your father, are now. Bye. Maybe that's him. He had a pretty sexy voice for the darkest force in the universe. With all the money in the environment, I think they'd make a more operational weapon in that jittery, two-legged walking thing. With all the money at their disposal?
Yeah. They're saving tons of money on dental plans. They either make a tank or this walking, teetering piece of crap. This obviously would fall over at a strong breeze. Look at that thing. I'm sure this was a good idea. Don't move. We surrender. We surrender. This is the teddy bear attack.
Oh, so arrows against armor? Come on. All right, take it. Nea's pretty good with her hands. don't trip
oh that's believable ouch you knocked me down let me get this straight 25 pounds of dog food can knock over a 400 pound armored man rocks oh look at rocks against rocks against my armor Step on that bastard Hasn't he used this before? Didn't we do this once already in Empire?
I thought the Ewoks had so much time to put such a sweet plan together All right, Skye. Did you hear Stoney just now? You gotta be kidding. He accidentally did. Well, she's laughed yet. That's the first person in 23 years that's laughed at this. We need you in the bunker right away. She's talking into a vibrator. Hey, where are we?
Hey, wait. This is me. I'm here, Alex. I would have loved for one of the ridges to fall out of that suit on the stake and they can nearly catch it. Got those pesky trees. Retreat, retreat, pull it.
I can't understand you. I don't speak jive. 20 degrees. I'll take the leader. For being so advanced, there's some pretty cumbersome helmets they wore. Pressure steady. I think they would have come up with something more lightweight. It's like a bowling ball in their head. The fighters are attacking.
I wonder what those star destroyers are waiting for. 4:45. We're going to attack. position now sir hold here we're not going to attack i have my orders from the emperor himself he has something special planned we only need to keep him from escaping as you can see my young apprentice your friends have failed now witness the fire power of this Fully armed and operational.
Soon, your face may look like mine, which will be an improvement. Now, this is the most uncomfortable helmet in the movie. That glass came from the Death Star. That thing's operational. Hey, if we have time later, would you be up with a game of dominoes? 'Cause we said "Rollin' Bones."
Our cruisers can't repel firepower of that magnitude! And we'll have that shield down. We've got to give him more time! Mesa thinks Ja-Ja should show up! Thank God that... Oh my Everybody's such a great shot On the first shot
Alright kids I gotta warn you Dead Ewok countdown It's coming up Prepare yourself Becca, close your eyes. Why did you have to be so brave? Well, I suppose I got hardwire this thing. I'll cover you. You learned this on Escalades in Chula Vista.
You're ready. Oh! Oh, dude. Honey, look at that. Dead puppets. Oh, my God. Sweet scar for earmuffs right here. I'll eat him. Ewok necrophilia. Yeah. Hey, hey. Yes, I said closer.
Keep as close as you can and engage your star destroyers in point blank range. So anyway, my second time I was in the can, I met this guy named Double Bone. Now this kid... Oh, hang on. I'm going to roll! That's how the black guy gets it. I'm in! I told you he was a bad driver. Look at that. No fleet is lost. And your friends on the indoor move will not survive.
There is no escape. This is not a speech to talk somebody into something. It's just flat out mean. So now he's Donald Trump? Well, guess what, Emperor? You're fired. Yes, will your friends. I can feel your way. Hey, what are you touching? I don't know if it's just... Hands, show us your hands. Strike me down with all of your hatred, and your journey towards the dark side will be complete.
Is this the hot seat from earlier today? Oh, my God. Poor sky. Now this is getting heavy. I don't know. Yeah! Yeah! Of course. These will be up again.
Sweet blue blockers, by the way. Again, the Ewoks kicking the crap out of the grown man. Look at that. He's knocked out. Whoa. Well, the Ewoks know how to operate one of these. Well, they know how to do everything, apparently. Obviously, they can't make an outfit or pants or anything, but they got that. An outfit. Well, you know.
I don't know that Ewoks really have an outfit. Huh? Come on, there, Sessor eyes. Hey, I'm the token black Ewok. No, that's not that. She always goes out. Yeah, baby. Yeah, baby, nice shot. You do that ass real good.
My name's Lutha. That's the most skilled Ewok ever. You didn't see that rope there? I thought it was a trap. Idiot. Again, pebbles being thrown at them, and that's working. Again, thank God the Ewoks have plenty of time to plan this.
Yeah. Oh, it's the old roll the logs down the hill trick. I think I got it. I got it. oh yes put your hand right on it how does it feel when i stick my finger in it like this does that feel better oh she was just shot in the arm by the way and she's that calm and collected
She's late, dude How does he know she's not HIV positive? Yeah, exactly Put some gloves, dude Stay back I mean, if she's as nondiscreet to make out with her brother Who knows where she's been? Chewy Get down here, she's wounded No, wait I got an idea Oh, that was a nut shot.
Doesn't every son want him to kick his dad's ass like that? Absolutely. No. I can't. Seriously, this is too brittle. It just upsets me. It's my dad. I mean, he raised me, put me through college. First semester, anyway.
I just... He just doesn't support me. You are unwise to lure your defenses. Like I didn't see that one coming a mile away, Dad. Give me a break. You know, they say, if you're black, you can't attack. Your thoughts betray you, Father.
I feel the good in you. The conflict. There is. All you're gonna feel is the ass in this lightsaber. You couldn't bring yourself to kill me. I'd like to put some more good in you. You underestimate the power of the dark side. Doesn't Vader look like a dog with an erection with that saber? Hey, no throwing! Dental plan. Two more shots like that, little Asian.
We going to Applebee's when we are done here. I want my baby back, baby back, baby back. Sorry, Sky. Thank you for being the Rip Police. - Three squats to help. Open the back door, sir. Hey, suckers.
Oh, we fell for the old... You have blasters. We fell for the old weird stupid trick again. They have blasters. Why don't they just start shooting? Pisses me off. Dog erection. You know, you're right. It's red. Oh, Blunder's got to interrupt with the legal ID again. Bad one in the bathroom, Sean?
Your feelings for them are strong, especially for them. What's going on with Sean? I don't know. Sean, what's going on? Talk to me. Hitting a wall. Oh, no. Sean, it is way too early to hit a wall. Don't do it. Don't worry. You've only got ten more hours. Hitting a wall. Nope. You're all right. You're all right. This is a good part of a Jedi, dude. I think I got a good bend back.
No, shut up. Shut up. Kill him! Kill that bastard! Kill that son of a bitch! Shut up, shut up, shut up. For the bed. You're listening to the 28-hour Mikey Marathon. The following takes place between midnight and 1 a.m. On KIOZ, San Diego's rock station.
Rock 105.3. Events occur in real time. All right, cheesy line. Let me give you a hand. I love it. Had to be said. Good. Your hate has made you powerful. Now, fulfill your destiny. This is your father's place at my side. What is going on with Sean?
My beat-off hand. Yes, but his too, so... Looks like we're both screwed. Never. You know what? No. Screw you. I'll never turn to the dark side. You don't think so, Dick Cheney. You failed your... I'll just... I should have never said that. Like my father before me. I'll just stand here wearing black Titan lycra all night long if I have to. In the name of John Kerry?
Get out of here. I say no to you. All I have to say to you is Four more years Four more years Four more years See how big that explosion was? I think not all died We're on our way Seriously Red group, gold group All fighters follow me I told you they do You were one crazy black man You will be destroyed.
That hurts. Seriously, I do my own. Electric. He's got a butt on his chin, too. Can you stop that? It hurts super bad. I'm so bad. Well, their skills are no match for the power of the dark side. Ouch!
Owie! It seems like a pink belly. Ouch! Ouchie, ouch! Do anything to stop them! Blue isn't my color! No! This really is hard to watch, you know, Emperor. He's a queer, but he is my son. You will die. I'm finally getting a break from that.
It really super hurt. Gosh, I feel like I've just been kicked around so bad. It's a summer, not a winter. Okay, I get it. You're mad. Now what can we do to fix this? He's so powerful.
How come he can't levitate or something like that? Yeah, no kidding. Can you imagine the microwaves that must have freaked out when this happened and the Death Star? Everything went kaputs. I'm now Jewish. Everything went kaputs. Boy, it was crazy then, huh? Did they even have microwaves? They got schmutz all over the place. Moishe. How are they going to eat the monsters in the place now? Take my emperor, please. I'm going in. Here goes nothing.
I love my Kang-pa, my Kang-pa, my Kang-pa. Now log on to the strongest power source. It should be the power generator. I want my dim sum, sum, sum, sum, sum, sum. It's making me laugh. Hey, wait. Isn't that Battlestar Galactica? Later, mustache. Split up and head back to the surface.
See if you can get a few of those time fighters to follow you. Copy, cold eater. Copy, Cal Crispy Chicken. Oh, there goes the DirecTV. Thanks. They've got to live out by this whole time. They just got season pass. Seriously, NFL season pass. Oh, 9-11.
Sir, we've lost our bridge deflector shield. Intensify the forward batteries. I don't want anything to get through. Intensify, forward, fire, power! Put that rubber on us! 11! Al-Qaeda! It's not Al-Qaeda. Dude, this is Al-Qaeda. It is Al-Qaeda. The Rebel Alliance are terrorists, dude. Seriously. Look at that. Here goes the Trade Center.
Thanks. Salamander's Bin Laden. That's right. Thank you, fat bastard. At the time, Darth Vader was like reading a children's story to a group of school kids. They come in and whisper to him. Get me my asthma medicine. Get my inhaler. You can stop it now.
Just for once. I farted in here. Get this thing off. Please. The air is not circulating. Get your breath. Yeah. I'm not. I'm not kidding. This is a bad one, Luke. I'm not going to lie. I warn you. The rectal ventilation is shut down. I think John Popper is underneath here. Yep, there's the harmonica. Yeah, he is.
He is under there. Christensen looks terrible. The blues traveler of space, ladies and gentlemen. That is the worst makeup job ever. I don't want to give me the run around. Oh, no. Mike's losing it. God, this is almost over. Hey, screw you. Eddie, seriously. When you saw this in the theater, were you disappointed at this point when you saw Darth Vader? Not at all. Dude. Why would I be? I wanted something more. It was terrible.
Yeah. What do you expect him to learn? Dude, when you saw the back of his head in Empire, and then you see this, give me a break. I mean, dude, it's a guy with baby powder all over his face. Let's see, makeup, what are you thinking? Maybe some talcum and a bald guy? And a vagina on the skull? Yeah. A little seal on the sides. I won't leave. Puss. Come on, give us some blues on that thing.
Just a couple songs. What do you guys think Luke's inheritance is? The cape? The suit? A little piece of the Death Star? Maybe. Upper level? There it is. All right, Wedge, go for the power regulator on the North Tower. My dad has sunglasses that look just like that. If that's the big power person, you'd think it was one shot. Yeah, no kidding.
Move the fleet, away from the desktop. Luke is so calm and collected. yeah this is when they're going back to saudi arabia so angry about that sky yep there they go let me tell you baby this is fun
I hope you enjoy our fight and any cocktails. And the ecosystem ruined forever. Thanks, guys. It's Halliburton for you. I'll tell you what, though, guys. I hope that thing was insured by AIS, which you can call right now. 1-800-777-4... Shut up. I'm sure, Luke. You don't really have to get... A-I-A-S. He wasn't.
No, but just a 10-minute phone call. All right, we know. We know. They're not paying for this. You love him. Did you say something? Don't you? Yes. Where'd you get that scar on your chin? All right. I understand. Fine. When he comes back, I won't get in the way. Oh, you are stupid. It's not like that at all. He's gay. Duh.
He's my brother. He's and he's queer. And you couldn't have told me this before because... See, I like making out with you and my brother. I think it moved. Thanks. You see, I'm his sloppy seconds. Enjoy. I banged her too, dude. She smelled like tuna. Yeah, even the Ewoks were like, I banged a bitch too.
There's tacos for everyone. I don't know how long that's going to take to burn. No kidding, dumbass. Guys made a solid metal. Burn, baby, burn. Disco Inferno. They had to burn him in the suit. Yeah. They had to cram that lid back on him. He disappears. You know?
You just got really serious on us. I mean, we were all having fun right up until then. Okay, more Lucas add-ons, everybody. If you're watching this on VHS, you're missing out. Because this adds a lot to the movie right here. Yeah, it's a cartoon now. It's about to all make sense. Oh, I get it now. Yeah. Wow, you're so awesome, Lucas, for the cartoons that you make. I want to see Bugs Bunny run across the screen right now. Ready for some Gungans.
Ultra realistic. And I'm Dick Clark live from space, ladies and gentlemen. The ball is about to drop. He still looks great, though. It's about to drop. Yeah. He was still alive in a galaxy far, far away a long time ago. Dude, Lucas even changed the end music. Is he out of control? This is not the end music. There's nothing sacred.
Jeez. I want to burn him like Vader. Collaborate with Jeff Probst on this music? The Ewok tribe has spoken. Yeah. Bring me your torches. First time I heard Rebecca laugh all day. The Ewok tribe has spoken. That got you. Are you kidding me? Oh, man. I'm out. Can you just hit fast forward now? It's over. This is terrible. I was banging this bitch.
Oh, you did too? Let's everybody hug. It's the last time we'll see Mark Hamill in a movie. How dare you for like this? Dana, how dare you? Look at this Here's Lucas' big thing There it is Stupid Death to you, Lucas Well, I don't know that you wanted to die Yes, I wanted to Because he added Hayden Christensen in the end
Slit his throat open And you know, Hayden acted that really good Well Alright, there you go Damn you did There it is And we did it Return of the Jedi First one over First one over Congratulations Everybody's like Please get me out of here Before Karate Kid Alright now how are we going to do this How are we going to do this To where we get back to the studio Just go back Just go back I'll cover Yeah
Eddie will cover Wow Yeah Eddie will cover Eddie's got it Unbelievable Eddie's got it Eddie's got it Eddie's got it Did everybody have fun Yeah it was good Wow I had a good time I enjoyed it I like Return of the Jedi Yeah. There was some tough parts there. I'll tell you what, though. That new ending, I hate that. Oh, dude. I despise it. I love the old music. Yeah. It was like, jump, jump, ba-da-da-da-da-ba-ba-ba. Absolutely. Did I just do the song from the end of Jedi? Yeah.
That was me, everybody. And he cut out the part where the people toppled the statue of the emperor. No, dude. That was in Iraq, bro. No, I'm dead serious. Dope, that was in Iraq. In the re-release of Star Wars, second edition, at the end of this movie. You're thinking of Saddam Hussein. No, they toppled the statue of the emperor. They toppled Saddam Hussein. They took it out. I remember, it was Saddam. Don't throw your mic down, you little bastard. Don't you do that.
Why didn't you take Mike to walk back to the studio? Oh, he went to smoke. Really? No, I'm here. Oh, there he is. Oh, there he is. Oh, good man. I don't know where my headphones are. Did you grab your headphones? I'm going to plug them. All right, it's all yours, dude. I'm coming back. All right, bring it back in. Bring it back, everybody. Bring it back. Now. Oh, my God, it's cold in here. Jeez, Skye, you're always complaining. Well, it is. It's like Antarctica. She's tired. She wants to go to sleep. Oh, yeah.
The whole deal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, so anyway, we hope you had fun. We're going to take a break for about 45 minutes, and that's it. Oh, you mean in between movies? Yeah, in between movies. Oh, I thought you were going to take a little nap. No, no, no. We're not taking a break in the traditional sense. We'll be here talking with you for the next 45 minutes. Blunder, I need you in here. I need you in here. And then we'll start it all up again. You want to know what the counter's at? What? Nine hours, 47 minutes, and five seconds. Oh, yeah.
Go ahead. Get us into it. All right. We're going back into delay. There we go. All right. And then this over here, what does this have to be? Yeah, flip that. There we go. All right. Cool. We are back in action, folks. So, listen, I don't know what you thought of it. You know, we're trying it out, doing the movie thing. I think Karate Kid will be more fun. Yeah, and I'd like to talk to some people that maybe had a chance to sit through it and do it with us and see if it worked. You know, watching the movie and doing the whole thing at the same time.
You know, because we don't know. We're just sitting there, you know, goofing off. So I have no idea. Yeah. it actually went for uh for listeners mikey show hello hello hey man did you uh watch the movie with us oh yeah i did did it work were you able to follow along did it match up and everything actually i think they're pretty good did you really yeah was it pretty fun did you like it it was interesting yeah cool man thanks all right mikey show hello hey it's p1 market s Dude, that was hilarious.
Dude, did you have fun? Oh, man, that was awesome. Oh, that's cool. One of my favorite movies. And hey, he's right. I have the VHS. It worked perfect. And he's right. They do topple the statue. Oh, really? Yeah, man. There you go. All right, thanks. Mikey Show, hello. Hey, that was entertaining as hell. I just got to wonder, did you have cracks like, hey, it's John Popper. There's his harmonica. Yeah, I said that, yeah. No, I'm saying that was spontaneous.
Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah, they didn't plan any of that. Yeah, we were just riffing. Yeah, god damn, there was another one. I'll try to call you back later and tell you what it was. But I did not sync it up at home. But like most Gen Xers, I have that whole damn movie in my head. Yeah. I didn't know about that hideous part about Hayden Christensen. Yeah, they stuck him in at the end, which is terrible. I seem to remember some gay, like, fireworks or stuff going on. Well, thanks a lot, dude. I'm glad you had fun with us. Mikey Show, hello. Hey, what's up, guys?
Just listening to your movie. It's a great idea. Thanks, man. Thank you. Yeah. Mikey Show. Hey, how's it going? Good. Did you have a chance to follow along with us? Yeah, I did. Okay, cool. Did you have a good time? Oh, man, the thing was great. Okay, cool, because we're going to do Karate Kid, too. Yep. Yeah, I know. I already have it. Awesome. Yeah. It's all lined up. It's in the VCR. Yep. See, I'm more excited for that one because this one was, you know. Sky, give me a break. I'm just saying it was like a boy flick, you know. I think Karate Kid's going to have a lot more funny jokes. Yeah, I think Karate Kid.
Yeah, and I've never seen Karate Kid. Oh, man, you're missing out. That's a classic kids movie. Yeah. Like, we all grew up with that thing. Yeah, dude. Awesome, man. It's a cruel summer, dude. All right, thanks a lot. Hey, thanks, man. That thing was great. We should do this every weekend. There you go. Thanks. All right, here's the deal. We're doing the Mikey Show 28-hour marathon. We're going to be up for 28 hours straight, which is going to be great, man. It's giving the people to get a chance to hear the show that wouldn't normally get to hear the show. So we love that. We want everybody to tune in.
We're going to be on until 10 o'clock this morning. And, yes, I'm saying this morning. Oh, wow. So it's already Thursday? Yeah, we started. What is it? It's Thursday. It's Thursday now. All right. It's Thursday. We started yesterday morning at 6 a.m. We haven't gone off the air. No music, no commercials, just us. We've been just going at it for that long. Blunder, are you trying to tell me something? Oh, do you need to put it slow? Something right now? Are you trying to tell me something? Yeah, did you want to play back something right now? Yeah.
Okay. Well, how about we play back our interview with David Draymond from Disturbed? Where is it? It's on your little R. Johnson Page 5 thing. That's cool. I'm looking. I don't see it. Dave Draymond, right there, right underneath TNT Box. Oh, yeah. This was cool. It picks up right when David calls in. We're already on the phone with Slash. Okay, cool. So check this out. This was earlier. Dave Draymond from Disturbed. Take a listen.