All shows / 28 Hour Show 2006 - Rock 105.3
28 Hour Show - 2006 - Hour 19
2006
28 Hour Show 2006 - Rock 105.3KIOZRock 105.3
Competitive board gamesRelationship adviceRadio show staff banterThe Wizard of Oz movie commentaryCrude humor and jokesLong form broadcasting challengesFictional Dr. Phil personaInside jokes and staff interactionsPop culture referencesMovie syncing with audienceradio showcomedy
The broadcast opens with the hosts, particularly 'Dr. Phil,' responding to an email from 'P1 Liz' complaining about her husband, Sky, being overly competitive in board games, leading to a near fistfight and being uninvited from game nights. The hosts immediately identify Sky as a staff member and mock him extensively, offering bizarre and dangerous 'advice' like divorce or choking on a Monopoly piece. After a failed attempt at another story, the show transitions into a live commentary of 'The Wizard of Oz,' with hosts Mikey, Eddie, B-Rob, Sky, Fish, Shawnee-O, and Ashley making crude, often offensive, and sometimes racist jokes throughout the movie. They frequently interrupt the film with personal anecdotes, inside jokes, and observations about staff members, often referring to characters as 'pedophiles' or making sexual innuendos, all while struggling to stay awake during their 28-hour marathon broadcast. The commentary covers the entire film, from the opening credits to Dorothy's return to Kansas, filled with irreverent humor and exhaustion-induced antics.
What happened, in order
Liz's Board Game Husband
An email from 'P1 Liz' describes her husband's extreme competitiveness in board games, causing arguments and getting them kicked out of social gatherings.
Dr. Phil Mocks Sky
The hosts, using a 'Dr. Phil' persona, immediately identify Liz's husband as staff member Sky and mock his competitive nature, referencing past arguments about 'cutlery as a weapon'.
Uncle Mark Foley's Dangerous Advice
'Dr. Phil' shares a bizarre story about his fictional 'Uncle Mark Foley' and then suggests a dangerous prank for Sky involving a Monopoly top hat in cereal.
Syncing The Wizard of Oz
The hosts announce they will watch 'The Wizard of Oz' and instruct listeners to sync their DVDs to watch along with their live, irreverent commentary.
Opening Credits & Crude Jokes
As the movie begins, the hosts make a series of crude and offensive jokes about the opening credits, film crew names, and the initial farm scenes.
Munchkinland Mayhem
The hosts provide commentary on Glinda and the Munchkins, making jokes about their appearance, minimum wage, and driver's licenses.
Tin Man's Herpes & Oiling
The hosts joke about the Tin Man's origin story, Buddy Epson's alleged herpes from the face paint, and make homoerotic jokes about oiling him.
Cowardly Lion & Staff Bathroom Breaks
The Cowardly Lion is introduced, leading to more jokes, while the hosts also comment on staff members taking bathroom breaks during the long show.
Flying Monkeys & Pop Culture
The appearance of the flying monkeys prompts various pop culture references and jokes, including comparisons to 'The Sopranos' and 'Quidditch'.
Wicked Witch Melts
The hosts provide commentary as the Wicked Witch of the West melts, making jokes about Boston Rob and the scene's delayed potential.
Oz's Gifts & Staff Antics
The Wizard of Oz gives the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Lion their symbolic gifts, while the hosts joke about Eddie walking around in his underwear and other staff antics.
Dorothy's Return & Show's End
Glinda reveals Dorothy always had the power to return home, leading to the movie's conclusion and the hosts wrapping up their commentary, expressing exhaustion.
People mentioned
MikeyP1 LizSkyDr. PhilEddieB-RobSeanFishShawnee-OAshleyMike CostaTrevorDorothy GaleScarecrowTin ManCowardly LionGlindaProfessor MarvelWizard of OzWicked Witch of the WestMiss GulchAunt EmUncle HenryTotoHerbert StockhardtMurray CutterHenry JaffaJack Blackhawk DawnBlancheAdrianCackling BettyVictor FlemingBuddy EpsonLou Gossett Jr.
10,248 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
Says, hey, Mikey, how's it going? Can you please explain something to me? My husband is out of control. He's so competitive that we got kicked out of our friend's board game nights. It says here, we play board games every week with a group of friends, but because of my husband's behavior, we've been asked not to come back. He gets into arguments every week. And last week was the final straw. He almost got into a fistfight with another player over a controversial word in Scattergories. Give me a break. It says, I yell at him every time, but he won't change. Can you tell me what to do? I'm at my wits' ends. It's signed P1 Liz in San Carlos. Way too complicated for us, but thank goodness.
Somebody was waiting in the green. Today on Dr. Phil, get excited about your life. If you're going to talk to me, you're going to have to be honest. This is going to be a changing day in your life. You have a condom? You have a condom? Thank you. You have a condom? That's right. Thank you so much. Condom for you, young man. Wow! What'd you say? What did he say? What did he say? Yeah! What the heck are you talking about? What? I don't know. Safe sex week. I'm passing that comment. What the hell did that email say? It talked about her husband. They're competitive in board games, apparently. Got kicked out of board game night. Let me respond to that. P1 Liz. Okay. Well, first of all, Mr. Sky.
Shut up. You don't have to resort to writing under the name Liz from St. Carlos, okay? It's not like we can't put two and two together. Is there anything about alliances in there? Exactly. Yeah, what are we playing, poker? Don't have alliances. No, I'm sure you don't. I'm sure you don't. It's all my bad if you guys don't think that cutlery can be a weapon, okay? Okay, guys, don't get it. Here we go. Anyway, Mr. Sky, your husband is actually Sky, and we get that. I think we got that the second you said that he is so competitive that he would get into a fight over a board game. Well, Dr. Phil, we haven't played since. Cutlery's a weapon. That's all we got to say. It's got to the point where you're telling people,
People are telling you that you can't come back now, Scott. I mean, isn't that embarrassing for y'all? No, no one's ever told. My husband didn't write that email. If you ask me, it's not so much how competitive she is, it's how she's always so wrong but keeps on arguing about it. Yeah, Dr. Phil. Cutlery being a weapon. I'm so glad you're here. And it's a board game, all right? Close the mouth, open your ears, okay? He's giving you good advice. This has nothing to do with me, and Dr. Phil never gives good advice. He just did. Oh, no. It happened just now. You're always wrong, and you continue to argue. Well, yeah, and it's like here on the show, but with all the comforts of home. Yeah, it's true. And if we're talking her house, by comforts, I mean number twos with the door open and going peeps without flushing. That's just gross, please. You want my advice? Two words, divorce lawyer. Give me a break with that one. It's like my old Uncle Mark Foley used to say. Dr. Phil, you did not have an uncle named Mark Foley. Yes, I did.
It was my uncle, Mark Foley. No, I don't believe that. And he'd say to me, he'd sit me down, he'd sit me on his lap, and he would say, Dr. Phil, come on over here and let's play hot dog vendor. And I'd always... What? I'd always be the hot dog, and that got old real quick. That's bad. But back to your game-playing homo of a boyfriend. The next time... The next time... Next time he starts getting hot at a game of Taboo, secretly sneak the top hat from the Monopoly game into his cereal. Why would you do that? Because, Eddie, when he starts choking on it, make him promise right before he passes out he will stop acting like a steroid freak at board game night, all right? And then when he agrees, then you can give him the Heimlich. Or not. It's your call. I'm a doctor. I'm Dr. Phil. That's very dangerous. Do that, everybody. No, I'm just saying I condone that behavior. That's all I'm saying. If you're listening in your cars, put the top hat in the cereal. The opinions expressed by Dr. Phil when he chokes him the Heimlich. Or not.
Or Rock 105.3. This reminds me of a story. Oh, does it? Yes, it does. Why are you saying it like, oh, really? It always reminds me of a story. It's the first time I've ever done that. It always reminds me of a story. Tell us about it. You didn't know a lot of stories, Dr. Bell. Not in the Indian teeth this time. No. No. No. No. Minority group of some kind. No. No. No. Firearms. This time it actually really does remind me of a story. Well, then I apologize. Thank you very much. Go ahead. Continue. Eddie, it was back when I lived in West Texas, and I would go watch those big-time high school football games. which, by the way, reminds me of a great new show on NBC 739 called Friday Night Lights, Tuesdays at 8 p.m. You don't need to. You're not doing commercials. Anyway. Okay, that's ridiculous. Stop it. You're doing a spot. No, I'm not, Eddie. I just want to remind you, Tuesday nights, 8 p.m., NBC 739, Friday Night Lights. Anyway, I was...
That sounds like the music from the television show. I had no idea that that was going to pop up there. Of course you did. Anywho. About this show starring Kyle Chandler. What are you talking about? I was in the locker room when the head coach made a speech to his team that I can still remember to this day. He told those boys, and I quote, he said to them, Boys! They say the heart of rock and roll is still beaten. Now that old boy may be barely beaten, but the heart of rock and roll, he said the heart of rock and roll still beat him in Cleveland. Listen, I got to tell. You're brutal. No, I'm not. You are brutal. No, I'm not. Back to you. More of it. You're almost done. Yes. I just wanted to tell this woman that the first problem is that she married a board game playing homo. Right. I mean, board games? Are you kidding me? Tell your husband, Congressman Foley. He's not. That's your uncle. Remember? To quit the homoerotic boggle and try a NASCAR race or two. All right? My mother.
who always seems to have the best advice, shared this nugget with me while I was growing up. She would say to me, Dr. Phil, if you ever play those board games like a junk-tucking daisy sniffer. I don't believe your mom said that. She did. And then she said to me, if you do that, I'll cut your Jacobs off with a rusty cat food can lid. What are you talking about? What mama said. What are the odds percentage-wise people still listening? Zero. Zero. All right, folks. I was going to say less than zero. It's a little something we like to call Dr. Phil. We do that throughout the show from time to time. 12.16 a.m., so we have nine hours, 45 minutes to go. Not bad. Oh, is that all? Now, I got to say.
This is always the hardest part for us during the 28-hour show. Yeah, dude. We've been broadcasting since 6 o'clock this morning. This is always the hardest part. Midnight to 6. Yeah, this is no fun. 6 o'clock is usually like second wind. Yeah. And I'm doing all right. Yeah. But, okay, we're going to start another movie. Yes, I like this one, so I'm excited. This is The Wizard of Oz. I think no Star Trek crap. Is there any particular version that this is of The Wizard of Oz? Extra gay. So what we want people to do is put in the Wizard of Oz DVD, and you need to go to the main menu. So get to the main menu of the Wizard of Oz DVD. Where is Sean? Where is Sean? I think he's making water. Hopefully Sean will be back soon. All right, so if you are watching at home right now, we need you to put your Wizard of Oz DVD in. Get it to the main menu. Have it ready to go on play. And what I do is I go one, two, three, play. When I say that, you hit your play button. We do it at the same time. We're all synced up. And as we make fun of the movie, you get to watch along with us. Are we ready? I didn't go to the bathroom. Eddie, do you have to go to the bathroom? I kind of do. You should do. Do it now. Yeah, come on. Do it now before we start. Some behind-the-scenes work. Just number one.
Wait, I don't think that's funny. Behind the scenes work? Remember when Sky was doing behind the scenes work? What are you guys talking about? What are you guys talking about? B-Rob, what have you been up to? Me? Yeah, where have you been? I went and got changed. What are you changed into? Some short sweatpants. My cargo sweatpants shorts. From one pair of sweatpants to another? Yes. I like the way you operate. Thank you. Very nice. Hey, what happened here? How did this... Oh, yeah, yeah. You gotta take it out. It's creepy. Eject that bisou. That bisou. The bisou? This is gonna take a long... How long is this movie? I think it's long. No, it's 103 minutes is what it says on the box. So what's that? So it's a little over an hour and a half. It's an hour and 40 minutes. That's not that bad. Yeah, it is bad. That is nice.
Yeah. Yeah. I was thinking like closer to three hours. I'm looking for more of like a six minute movie. Yeah. What are you going to do for the other hours you're on the air? Mikey? Yeah. Mikey, if you like, I can give you a six minute movie right now. Good. Wow. Thank you, Chase. Sounds gay. You think? Wow. Good times. So Sky says the scariest part of this movie is the monkeys. Dude. Yeah. Like, that witch is nothing. I don't know what you're talking about. The witch. The monkeys are freaky. How old are you? Those little stoned eyes that the witch had. Look at those. Guy's eyes. This guy's like, yeah, that's not scary. There it goes again. Dude, this DVD is possessed. You're going to just have to reset it. Mike, I think there's ghosts in that DVD. I think if you hit play again, it's just going to go right back to that scene. I think you need to, like, restart the program now. Oh. If you hit play right now, it's going to go see. That's what it did.
Why is Fish yelling at people at the top of his mouth? I'm trying to help. I don't know. I'm trying to help. Look at that. See? Hey, everybody. Hey, Shawnee-O in the PJs. Shawnee-O boy. You're looking snazzy. Shawnee, you look great. Oh, he's a zombie. Look at him. What's the deal, Shawnee? Are you ready to party or what? Let's do this up, Shawnee. Come on. Hey, everybody. Look at Shawnee. This guy is ready to party. Sean is about to snap. Baby, shut your mouth. See, Sean's going to snap. Back to the main menu. What is that, Abizaba? Get to the main menu. If you're watching at home, main menu of Wizard of Oz. I'm going to say 1, 2, 3, play. When I do that, you hit the play button. Here we go. One, two, three, play. Oh, my gosh. Well done. All right. I just took my first hit acid. Me too. Let's rock this bitch. Somebody stop Pink Floyd the wall. Yep. Really? Bitch, help us out. I'm pretty comfortable. There you go. Sweater. Sky. Butcher. Sky. Look at that. Sky. Is she homeless? Stop it. If my husband's listening, he's going to be really mad. Boston Rob's guy. There are foals all over.
Your sweatshirt. I love this sweatshirt. I won't let you shake me out of it. All right. Ah, yes. Herbert Stockhardt did do the music. Ah, Murray Cutter. One of the best. Ain't that right, Big Mike Costa? You loved him. Henry Jaffa. Heil Hitler. Jack Blackhawk Dawn. Ah, look, the film editor was Blanche. Adrian! Hey. Cackling Betty's over there. We're trying to do a little show. Shut up. Victor Fleming. Go ahead, Sky. Fast forward. Follow the yellow brick mat painting. I hope she trips. No panties. Oh, heads up. Did she hurt you? She tried to, didn't she? Come on. We'll go tell Uncle Henry and Andy M. Come on. Beating.
Two seconds isn't a stupid movie. That's where we do the lynchings. Don't bother us now, honey. This old incubator has gone bad and we're likely losing a lot of our chicks. Oh, that poor little thing. Oh, but Aunt Amy, Miss Goach hit total right over the back with a rake just because she says he gets in her garden and chases her nasty old cat every day. Oh, my God, is she on that? Dorothy, please. Oh, but he doesn't do it every day. Just wants her twice a week. And he can't catch her old cat anyway. Oh, no, we. And now she says she's going to get the traffic. Dorothy, Dorothy, we're busy. And put on some deodorant. All right. How's she coming? Hey, get easy. Shawnee, is that better? You've got my finger. Why don't you get your finger out of the way? Knock, knock, knock, knock. Right on my feet. Ladies and gentlemen, the first ever sexual predators. Let me register. You ain't using your head about, Miss Gulch. Think you didn't have any brains at all. I have so got brains. Well, why don't you use them? When you come home, don't go by Miss Gulch's plate. Check this out. I haven't got an ass. And you won't get no trouble, see?
You just won't listen, that's all. Well, your head ain't made of straw, you know. Oh, you son of a... Ham! Yeah, which is which? There's a Honeybake right there. Yeah, Skye. Not bad. Not her favorite anymore. Are you going to let that old... She ain't nothing to be afraid of. That's how boy Bloomberg eats. I'm not afraid of her. Sorry, dude. I know, you went and got the fan in everything. That's what I do. Oh, nice upskirt shot. Again, that's how Boy Wonder has sex.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Last one. Last one. No way. She's as scared as I am. What's the matter? Go let a little old pig make a coward out of you? Look at you. What's all this jabber-woffing when there's work to be done? Jabber-jabber. Mr. T said that was my part. You dumb white cracker bitch. Let's get back to our racist behavior. You all know Negroes moved in up the road. Don't start posing for it now. Here, here. Can't work on an empty stomach. Have some crawlers. Gosh, Mrs. Dale. Just fries. What? You see, Dorothy toppled in with the big door. It's no place for Dorothy around the pigsty. Now you go feed those hogs before they worry themselves into anemia. Yes, and I'm going to take this plate of poo and go eat it. Don't they put down my turd? I'm a dog. Thanks for feeding me my own poop. I can get this at home.
I'm having a great time guys, how about you? About 80 years from now, Katherine McPhee will annoy the crap out of everybody with this song. Now what are we supposed to do during these songs? Talk in the background? Dogs on steroids? Dead. That's awful. That is. Awful sentiment. Yeah. Accurate, but. Halloween costume or not. Rob. Is it a naughty version? Always. Yes. Hot. Mike. Participate in that. Skye. Sean. The ball gag. Glad we covered that. It got really weird in the end. I think that dog's retarded. Why? Because it's not singing along? Yeah. What do you want it to do? Right.
Bark along or something? Blankly at nothing. Look at him. Poor thing. Probably can't see out of one eye. Mike, there's your girl. Oh, that ain't okay, man. That right there is hot, dude. That right there is a masculine, masculine jaw. Actually, no seat on that bike when she was riding. That was actually the first terrorist attack ever. I will tell you to your wife right away about Dorothy. Dorothy, what did Dorothy do? She done. I'm all but lame for the bite on my leg. I love how B.R. Horny cop tied her dog. She bit her dog, eh? That's my butt. That's my butt, I might tell you. I'm getting him to the sheriff and make sure he's destroyed. Destroyed? Toto? Oh, you can't. You mustn't. That woman has bad coffee. Uncle Henry won't let her, will you? Of course we won't. Where are we in? Please, Aunt Em.
Toto didn't mean to. He didn't know he was doing anything wrong. I'm the one that ought to be punished. I let him go. Okay, we'll put you to sleep. If you don't hand over that dog, I'll bring a damn suit that'll take your whole farm. There's a law of protection, folks, against dogs that bite. How would it be if she keeps him tied up? He's really gentle. With gentle people, that is. Those jobs not available back then. Here's his order allowing me to take him. Unless you want to go against the law. Well, who would want to do that? I don't read, but this looks official. Just because you own half the county doesn't mean you have the power to run the rest of us. For 23 years, I've been dying to tell you what I thought of you. And now, well, being a Christian woman, I can't say it. That old crazy bitch has a point, doesn't she? She's got the beating. You see that dog? Yeah. Dad.
I'm a pedophile. No, no, no, don't tell me. You're traveling in disguise. No, that's not right. John Mark Carr, the first. You're going on a visit. No, I'm wrong. You're running away. How did you guess? Are you a page? Professor Mahler never guesses. He knows. Now, why are you running away? No, no, don't tell me. They don't understand. No, no. Life a stripper. No, no. Village idiot. Big mountains. Big oceans.
An uncle with wandering fingers. He's perfectly welcome. Let's see, where were we? Do you know any? Oh, you mean the thing? Well, I never do anything without consulting. You got any dirty books in that basket? Let's go inside. Let's come along, I'll show you. You know, I bought this hat from Kip Winger. This is the same genuine, magic, authentic crystal. Meth. Let me get out my magic spoon. In which Cleopatra first saw the approach of Julius Caesar and Mark Anthony and so on and so on. And J-Lo. Yeah, she eventually married J-Lo. And open your mouth.
With the infinite. We can't do these things without reaching out into the infinite. Yes, that's all right. Now you can open them. We'll gaze into the crystal. I see Jack Ruby. Jack Ruby? A house with a picket fence and a bar with a weatherman and a running horse. That's our farm. Me taking a Polaroid's view. She's wearing a polka dot dress. Her face is careworn. That's her name. Yes, her name is Emily. That's right. Dirty Sanchez. But she's crying. Someone has hurt her. Someone has just about broken her heart. And everybody's crazy about a sharp dress. Someone she's taken care of in sickness. I had the measles once, and she stayed right by me every minute. I had polio once. What's she doing now? What's this? She's putting her hand on her heart. She's dropping down on the bed. Oh, no, no. That's all. Crystal's gone dark. You don't suppose she could really be sick, do you? Oh, I'm late. But what's this? I thought you were going along with me. I'm drunk. I have to get to her right away. Come on, Toto.
Now the weather's getting bad. We got a video to shoot. According to the movie Twister, if you hold on to that pole, you should be okay. Oh, I'll definitely give that a try. Thanks for the advice. Please do. I mean, I would have thought to go underground, but... According to you. Bill Pullman and Helen Hunt held onto a pole. Just hold onto a pole and you'll be fine. Here comes the flying cow, I think. Oh, let's see. Little known fact about this scene, guys. Judy Garland was actually knocked unconscious during this scene and two bear cubs were licking her face while she was out. Wow, and that didn't wake her up? No. Weird. That was blunder.
Oh, Lenders and the Wizard of Oz? Think about this scene. Go ahead. It's very boring. Oh, great. Oh, no. Stan Humphreys. This is what happens in Ashley's brain most of the time. That's a Christmas ornament. This part, I hate this part. I'm going to get bad, you guys. Yeah, it is. It's like she's taking mushrooms. I've been on the air for a long time. I'll figure it out a couple hours. Careful D. D? Yeah, it will be. Oh, color! I thought we were watching Schindler's List.
Who knew? Great topic for a wedding. Ladies and gentlemen, El Cajon. It's edible. It is? Where's Gene Wilder? What are you talking about? Makeup on, start dancing around. It's like my family reunion. I'm sorry, I've always wondered, what's down the red brick? No, it's okay, you just walked on my joke, it's fine. I'm sorry. What else is new? I always wondered what's down the red brick road. The red brick road? Yeah. Eddie, what's down the red brick road? A pizza oven. Do you think they're illegals? There it is, two hour mark. Oh my god, this is getting weird. Incredible specialist. Pop it! Be like Rosie O'Donnell, get a paperclip. Hi, I'm a lesbian. I know it. Are you a good witch or a bad witch? Who, me? I'm not a witch at all. I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas.
Well, is that the witch? Have you ever seen this munchkin in your life? I'm a little muddled. The munchkins call me because a new witch has just dropped a house on the Wicked Witch of the East. And there's the house. And here you are. And that's all that's left of the Wicked Witch of the East. What the munchkins want to know is, are you a good witch or a bad witch? How old are you? But I've already told you, I'm not a witch at all. Witches are old and ugly. 312. What was that? The munchkins. They're laughing because I am a witch. I'm Glinda, the witch of the North. You are? I beg your pardon, but I've never heard of a beautiful witch before. Only bad witches are ugly. The munchkins are happy because you have freed them from the wicked witch of the East. Oh, but if you please, what are munchkins?
People who live in this land. It's Munchkin land. And you are their national heroine. They don't have to pay a minimum wage. They work for less. Still not allowed to get a driver's license, though. They work for half. Oh, yeah, this is where it gets good, you guys. It does? Yeah, you see that shoes, dude? You're right. I wish I lived there. Dude, I'd rule that place. Don't mess with me. You'd be smaller than them, though. No, I would be the tallest guy there. I don't know. I think they can cook both. I don't know, little hands. Oscar Schindler hired that. Really was no miracle. What happened was just this. Sension was this joke in Wizard of Oz. Thank you. And suddenly the hinges started to unhitch just then.
to satisfy an itch when flying on her broomstick thumbing for a hitch Didn't we do that to Big Al Kahuna last week? Let the joyous news be spread, the wicked old witch had lost his name. We went to war with him. Here's the king, Eddie. He left the charm, huh? Thank you. Oh, that was annoying. Why do all the munchkins sound like Mikey?
Opposite those three parts were actually played by dudes Michael J Fox First midget fraternity. I thought you said she was dead. That was her sister, the Wicked Witch of the East. Is that the deal that's supposed to be a bro? I mean, look at that. She's worse than the other one. More of a mob, what she is. You're critiquing a bro? Well, look at it. All the things we got going on here. I didn't mean to kill anybody. Well, my little pretty. Whoa. We're getting the ruby slippers. David Banner. It's the same chick that was right in the butt. Those brows. I totally figured this movie out, you guys.
Or I'll. Yeah. Who makes those? I did. I told them not to talk if they don't have a microphone. Oh, rubbish. You have no power here. Be gone. Before somebody drops the house on YouTube. I'm going to drop a house on him. Lesbo. Sean, do you think her poops are green? That was a perfect opportunity for another great white joke when I didn't do it. Looks like a really comfortable dress.
I can't go the way I came. No, that's true. The only person who might know would be the great and wonderful Wizard of Oz himself. Is he good or is he wait? Very good, but very mysterious. He lives in the Emerald City, and that's a long journey from here. Seattle? Did he bring your broomstick with you? The Emerald City? I'm not a club in PB. Long time ago. The Munchkins will see you safely to the border of Munchkinland. And remember... Never let those ruby slippers off your feet for a moment, or you will be at the mercy of the Wicked Witch of the West. What about all these freaks? How do I start for Emerald City? It's always best to start at the beginning, and all you do is follow the yellow brick road. Bring Frodo with you. One ring to rule them all. I just follow the yellow brick road. Poof. Show off. People come and go so quick.
You see that guy right behind her? You don't know that. Don't run into the painting. Now, little known fact filmed in New Zealand. Which way do you go? Little. Little known fact about this movie. This is Doobie Hauser's favorite movie. Really? That's actually a known fact. Oh. As of this past week. On me. That way is a very nice way. Who said that? It's clearly a guy. Retard.
He's not strong. Silly turtle. Scarecrow don't talk. It's clearly the guy that you know from Kansas. That's funny. Wasn't he pointing the other way? Of course, people do go both ways. Well, Doogie did for a while, but I... Why, you did say something, didn't you? And I... But I... How can't you make up your mind? That's the trouble. I can't make up my mind. I haven't got a brain. Only strong. How can you talk if you haven't got a brain? Well, Mikey does it all day. Some people without brains do an awful lot of talk. Don't they? Yes, I guess you're right. How about I set you on fire? How do you do? Very well, thank you. Oh, I'm not feeling at all well. You see, it's very tedious being stuck up here all day long with a...
Can I just say there's nothing wrong with having a pole stick up your back all day? It doesn't hurt you. Oh, no, I just keep picking it up and putting it back in again. Are you still there? Yes. Did I scare you? I just thought you hurt yourself. What's his superpower then? I don't know, you've got to watch Heroes on Wednesday. Oh, he's the crow. You see? I can't even scare the crow.
They come from miles around. No, no, they did some weird thing where they film it later with the back of his head or something. I've seen this before. Well, what would you do with a brain if you had one? Why, if I had a brain, I could... I could while away the hours. Confirming with the flowers. Consulting with the rain. I would blow up North Korea. Busy hatching if I only had a brain. Ashley, where are you going? What? She was leaving. I didn't want her to leave. I love this part. The ocean's near the shore. I could think of things I never thought before. And then I'd sit and think some more. I would not be just a nothing. My head all full of stuffin'. My heart all full of pain. I would dance and be merry. I would be a dairy if I only had a brain. Okay, okay, okay. Why, if our scare crow back in Kansas could do that, the crows would be scared to pieces. They would? Where's Kansas? That's where I live. And I want to get back there so badly, I'm going all the way to Emerald City to get the Wizard of Oz to help me. You're going to see a wizard? Mm-hmm.
Do you think if I went with you, this wizard would give me some brains? K-I-O-Z, San Diego. So everybody knows I'm getting loopy. I'm getting a little loopy myself. You know, for a second, I thought I was imagining that Mike Costa was in the room. It's really weird. It's so strange. I was hallucinating. I won't be any trouble because I don't need to think. And I won't try to manage things because I can't think. Oh, wow. Won't you take me with you? Oh, wow. Why, of course I will. You don't need to stand. Hooray! Well, I'll have to see a wizard. You're not starting out very well. Oh, I'll try. Really, I will. Thank you. To what? To what? To what? To what? I'll have to see the wizard. Oh, yeah. The wonderful wizard of ours. He is the wizard of a wizard ever a wizard that was.
This is where the movie really picks up. Is that a toucan in the tree? Well, you know, toucans are all over Oz. You can't get rid of them. It's really a problem for a while. They try traps, pellets, everything. Have you guys noticed the green witch right there in the bushes? I didn't see any. Have you heard the myth of the guy killing himself in the background in this scene? I have. What do you think you're doing? It's an emu. Alright, it's an emu. Oh, those were those ants. No, that's Lord of the Rings again. Yeah, that's Lord of the Rings. That tree smokes a lot, huh? Come along, Dorothy. You don't want any of those apples, too. No, they're bad apples. Oh, no.
It's just that she doesn't like little green worms. Those trees are racist. No, they are. That was somebody's big brain. Yeah. Oh, nice. Iron Man. Yeah, I love Iron Man. Part of the Tin Man originally went to Buddy Epson. It's the truth. I know. He was allergic to the face paint. It's not a little known fact. It, uh, from what I understand, it gave him herpes. Oh. Herpes? Not bad I didn't. Wow. Yes. He's an oil can. Oil can. Where do you want to be oil first? Hey, soon. Uh-oh. Hello. I'm the oblongs. Well, hello. I'm on an axe.
If you were questioned, that would be far out. My goodness, I can talk again. Oh, homoerotic. Pour water on him. No, it feels wonderful. I've held that axe up for ages. Goodness, where did you ever get like this? About a year ago, I was chopping that tree when suddenly it began to rain. And right in the middle of the chop, I... I rusted solid. I've been that way ever since. Perfect now. My neck. My neck. Perfect? Next time we gotta do this. Bang on my chest if you think I'm perfect. Oh, no. Go ahead, bang on it. Bad idea. Beautiful. What a nickel. It's empty. The tinsmith forgot to give me a heart. No, he didn't. No heart? The what? No heart. The tinsmith. No heart. When a man's an empty kettle.
He should be on his metal. They should come up with another melody. Just because I'm presuming that I could be kind of human if I only had a heart. I'd be tender, I'd be gentle. Eddie, how you hanging in there? I'm getting a little crazy. Yeah, I'm getting a little loopy. I'd be friends with the sparrows. And the boy who shoots the arrows if I only had a heart. I'm editing myself. Picture me a balcony. Things that are popping in my head are bad. I hear a beat. sweet just to register emotion, jealousy, devotion, and really feel the part. I get the feeling they want to switch outfits. I could stay young and I'd lock it with a zipper if I only had a heart. You know what would help my heart? If I put on that dress. Get the knee, get the knee. That's the same thing got Bo Jackson.
You're just tuning in. We're watching The Wizard of Oz. You can watch it with us. I'm afraid I'm a little rusty yet. Get it. Get it, Rusty. That was wonderful. You know? WD-40 wasn't going to be invented for 30 more years. You're going to come with us to the Emerald City to ask The Wizard of Oz for a heart. Well, suppose the wizard wouldn't give me one when we got there. Oh, but he will. He must. We've come such a long way already. He does. He does. He does. Don't worry. Oh, that's not good. That's not a good sound. Oh, there's Mike's girl. You call that log? Why, you just begun. DK2. Helping the little lady alone. Are you my fine, gentlemen? Well, stay away from her. Or I'll stuff a mattress with you. And you, I use you for a knee. Little known fact, the Wicked Witch was played by Lou Gossett Jr. Great job.
Great white joke right there. I know. I chose not to say it. I'm getting freaked out the last time. I'm not afraid of her. I'll see you can take me to the wizard now, whether I get a brain or not. Stupid. She's a Rhode Island. I'll see you reach the wizard, whether I get a heart or not. A beehive. A heart. Let her try and make a beehive out of me. You're the best friends anybody ever had. We barely know each other. I feel as if I've known you all the time. But I couldn't have, could I? I don't see how. You weren't around when I was stuffed and sold together, were you? I was standing over there rusting for the longest time. Still, I wish I could remember. But I guess it doesn't matter anyway. We know each other now, don't we?
That's right. We do. To us? To us. All this talk about the Wiz made Rob have to go to the bathroom. Sky? You have one? No. You said yeah when he asked that. I thought he said, is it weird that he has one? Oh. That's weird. Should I wait for the lion? I don't like this forest. That's what most people... That's the hot part. Creepy. It's like Sawyer and Kate all the time. Of course, I don't know, but I think it'll get darker before it gets lighter. A talking lion makes no sense. Do you suppose we'll meet any wild animals? Get over it, alright? No! They ruined my favorite show. They did not. They did. Some, but mostly lions and tigers and bears. Lions and tigers and bears. Oh my!
Oh, that's the worst. Looks like our cat Sidney. You know what's great is you can't even tell that there's any makeup on him at all. Is this a Jewish lion? Why I oughta. Here, here, go away and let us alone. Oh, scared, huh? Afraid, huh? How long can I stay fresh in that can? Come on, get up and fight, you shivering junkyard. Put your hands up, you lopsided bagger. Oh, we'd all be asking anything for that outfit, that costume. Yes, get up and teach him a lesson. Well, what's wrong with you teaching him? How bad do you think the inside of that costume smelled by the time this movie was done?
I don't know. Sean? Yeah, Sean, what do you think? Sean, rather not. What do you think of, Sean? Outward slap. Moi pie. Moi pie. Moi pie. Chop out. It's bad enough picking on a straw man, but when you go around picking on poor little dogs... Well, you didn't have to go and hit me, did you? Aww. Is my nose bleeding? Well, of course not. My goodness, what a push you're making. Well, imagine when you go around picking on things weaker than you are. Why, you're nothing but a great big coward. Sean, you're hanging in there? You're right. I am a coward. He's having a hard time. I haven't had any courage at all. You got a fan blowing on you. I even scare myself. Can somebody put ice in front of the fan? Look at the cycles under my eyes. I haven't slept in weeks. Why don't you try counting sheep? I haven't had a good pastradi in a long time. Oh, that's too bad. Holy matzo. Don't you think the wizard could help him too?
I don't see why not. Why don't you come along with us? We're on our way to see the wizard now, to get him a heart. And him a brain. I'm sure he could give you some courage. Well, wouldn't you feel degraded to be seen in the company of a cowardly lion? I would. Oh, of course not. Gee, that's awfully nice of you. My life has been simply unbearable. Well, it's all right now. The wizard will fix everything. It's been in me so long. I just got to tell you how I feel. Well, come on. Yeah, sad, believe me, missy. When you're born to be a sissy. Without the feminine butter original songs. But I could show my prowess be a lion, not a mowership I only have to learn. I can't hear you, Ashley. Well, no one cares. She's not on a microphone. I'm afraid there's no denying. Why aren't you on a microphone? She's just hanging out now. A fate I don't deserve. Are you going to fight Trevor again? I'd be brave as a blizzard. I'd be gentle as a lizard. I'd be clever as a lizard. If the wizard is a wizard. You know he's been trying to get me to drink all night. Just so you know. Trevor, yeah.
Make a really good influence. Don't do that, Trevor. Anyways, we should be this for Halloween next year, Eddie. It could be Dorothy. I call the Tin Man. Wait, Eddie, that's really weird. That's not appropriate. Beer, I would be the Scarecrow. I'll be the carrot. Oh, I hate that thing! Is that a real monkey? What is that? I don't know. Sean, are those the monkeys you had at your wedding? Great line. It was a legitimate question. Great line. Thanks, Betty. Where have you been all my life? Right here, baby. What? Looks like Sky's house on a Friday night.
First ever margarita. Yes, fields and fields of heroin. That is so realistic. Ah, the skyline. I'm feeling like Dorothy. I can't run anymore. Yeah, guys. When you get sleepy, do you put your hand to your forehead? I rub my eyes. I wasn't really asking, actually. Uh-oh.
Don't cry. You'll trust yourself again. Cover the thick of it, 40 weeks. Wouldn't be bad. Don't you start at two. Guys, only an hour and 25 minutes. I don't think I could, but we could try. That'd be awesome. This is terrible. Oh, man, I'm really anticipating it. It's going to be so good. Oh, this is terrible. Oh, the line's in the right position. Sean, Sean, Sean. That is spade and neuter your cats. Help! Help! Help! Hey, Sean, that's kind of like you when you sleep. Yes, it is! Maybe that'll help. That's dandruff. It does help. Dorothy, you're waking up. The coke man. It's your weather we're having, ain't it? It's the carpet in Sam Kennison's car. Give me a bump. I sold it out for that one. Come on. Oh, no, the flying monkeys. I don't know. Are they real monkeys? What are those? I hate those things.
Oh, the episode of the Sopranos. That's how I picture a sneaky one-baller nasty. Hey, Eddie, look, more skipping. It's the worst song ever recorded. You don't mean that. The scariest scene in the movie. Paperclip. Real. Let's get to the Quidditch match. That's for the nerds. Did she just say something about... Is that rip-torn? It is. Where's the confetti? Sky's vocal teacher. Wow. I'm tired. Rubbing the back isn't going to make up for that. That's more like it. Now, take your business. We want to be the wizard. But nobody can see the great odds. Nobody's ever seen the great odds. Even I've never seen them. Unnecessary.
Okay, that has nothing to do with this movie, Sean. Keeping me awake. I like it. Hey, Sean. Knock it off. She's wearing the ruby slippers. You know, the Wizard of Oz has proved to be tougher than I thought it was going to be. I don't know why that was so funny. Ashley, you see that horse? Dead. I love you, Irish. Drunk drivers. These guys will give you rides all throughout downtown San Diego.
That's Prince's horse. Oh, acid is fun. A horse of a different color. That's what he said. You know what they say. You can eat a horse to slaughter, but... Okay, what's going on? I just got that. So this is the present? Oz? Very similar.
In almost every way. Why is he wearing a bow? It's a training line. It's Oz. It's not. Look at those guys behind me. Look at those guys. It's on Valdez. Go on KGB. They were skywriting. Surrender. Yeah, I surrender. Better hurry if we're going to see the wedding. I wear my sunglasses at night. So I can. So I can. I like your mom. Go home. If you please, sir, we want to see the wizard right away. All four of us. Nobody can see the great Oz. Not nobody, not know how. But please, it's very important. And I got a permanent just for the occasion. Not nobody, not know how. We're going to rock on to Electric Avenue. And then take higher. That was played out at 12.30. Wait here, I'll announce you at once. Did you hear that?
He'll announce us at once. I've as good as got my brain. I can barely hear my heart beating. I'll be home in time for supper. In another hour, I'll be king of the forest. Long live the king. Not with that bow on your nose. See that lion? Yes, dead. I were king of the forest. Not queen, not duke, not prince. My regal robes of the forest. What? Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur Rachel Slur
That's Chewie's girlfriend. Chewie loves that lady. This is the worst song in the movie. I wish I was Terry Schiavo right now. Eddie. Don't take a bow. Eddie, don't take a bow. That was really... Thank goodness we're in Safe Harbor. Thank goodness we're in Safe Harbor. I don't think the XCC has a problem with Terri Schiavo. She's like, okay, F Terri Schiavo. But you see, her comment really enhances it for the listeners at home. Oh, Safe Harbor. They're all schooled on the FCC regular. Of course. Hey, you're pissing me off. I'm not kidding. I'm not.
Another joke. Not even a rhinoceros? Imposterous. How about a hippopotamus? I wish this movie was over us. What about a elephant? What about a brontosaurus? I'd show him who was king of the forest. How? How? This is the worst movie ever. I don't know what we were thinking about. What makes the elephant charge his tusk in the misty mist or the dusky dusk? Come on, Asgard. His musk. Let's make some jokes. What makes the sphinx the seventh wonder? What? Come on, Asgard. What makes the dorn come up like sun? Why are you talking to me like that? What are you doing?
I'm getting more safe harbor. Shut up, Sean. Courage. You can say that again. The Wizards has gone. I just pissed myself. It looks like we came a long way for nothing. I was so happy. I was on my way home. Don't cry, Dorothy. Here's the heroin. We certainly are. Did somebody say, Heroin? I never appreciated her running away and hurting her feelings. That's the wizard's voice. That was not the wizard. That was Sue. That's Sue. Not Sue, not the wizard. And it's all my fault. Oh my gosh. Please don't cry anymore.
Get you into the wizard somehow. Come on. I hadn't had him myself once. Oh, shut up. Pull the curtain back. Skip. Skipping anymore, Ash. Damn. I thought you meant skip the chapter. That's what Claire Channel's going to look like. Wait a minute, fellas. What was you stinking? I really don't want to see the wizard this much. I'd better wait for you outside. That's what we're all going to be acting like in a year. He's just scared again. Don't you know the wizard's going to give you some courage? I'd be too scared to ask him for it. We're skipping our way over to Free FM. I'm too scared. All right, free ones. I like it. I like it. You did it yourself.
Look, it's an Xbox. Oh, look, it's Boy Blender's apartment. Guy loves green. Guy loves green. Brilliant side joke. He does love green. I want to go home. Look, it's a Stained concert. Hey, look, it's Boy Blender's apartment. Dude, you're bald. Grey White Show? Yeah. Okay. If you please... My daughter will be... Liza Minnelli. No. That's impossible. Which one are you, Jeff or Jer? Oh, Jer needs the hearts. Brandy needs the brains. You billowing veil of excellency. I mean, your wizardry. You ought to be in a better movie.
I will never watch this movie again. Word. Bless him on acid. What? What? What? What? Safe harbor. Safe harbor. Okay. Commercial break. All right, everybody. Thanks for coming. Oh, they caught over? We all really enjoyed it. It's the flying monkeys. Awesome. I would love that. Shark. Do it. I'd turn back if I were you. That would be awesome. I would shark my pants. That would be awesome. Really, nobody cares in the room? I don't. I encourage it, actually. That's great.
There it is. Hey, that was the owl from Class of the Titan, Sean. That didn't wake you up? No way. I believe there's spooks around here. Hey! Hey, Sean. He's freaking racist. Don't you believe in spooks? No. I don't own it. I think there's some spooks around here, too. Corn ACL. I do believe in spooks. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. No. No monkeys. She's throwing up when she talks. No. No. What are those? Purple monkeys. They're not people. The original Transformers.
He's going to say something. Is it going to be funny? Well... Well, that's you all over. Sure knocked the stuffings out of you, didn't it? We've got to find Dorothy. Little dog. Hey, hey. And you, my dear. What an unexpected pleasure. It's so kind. All right, Rob, one minute. Certainly, certainly. That's what happens when Sky goes to pay the check. There she goes. Yeah, Rob. Anything? Let's get ready to get put up. Nothing?
Uh, was that Big Charlie on her chin? Is that good? No, you're better than that. Okay. Let's see. What do we got here? And so are the days of our lives. Oh, she's in a pickle now. She wishes she had a pickle. Right? You know what I'm saying? Stay five or we can talk about it. Where are you? You are ugly. We're trying to find you. Where are you? I'm stuck in the witch's castle and I'm trying to get home to you, Annie. I wish I was hunting with Dick Cheney right now. Look. Where did he come from? Is this over yet? Please. Don't you see? In my face. Thank you. Now I don't have to watch this dumb movie. Again, please. Hold my strength. Oh, yeah. Oh, I hate to think of her in there. We've got to get around. Don't cry now. We haven't got the oil can with us and you've been squeaking enough as it is.
Opposite. Oh, opposite coming from the guy who has one joke an hour. But at least it's funny. Hey, different taste. No jokes or bad jokes. Thank you, guy. Oh, wrong. Opposite. Kim Jong-il, a ledge of a speech. Bloods versus the crypts. You guys think that Ryan Seacrest is doing this exact same thing right now? Yep.
And gay guys. Third joke. That might be played by Bryant Bumble. Uh-oh. Nice edit. She's kind of cute in that light. Hey, that's dangerous. Look at that sunburn like that. Oh, she's melting. This is what happens to Boston Rob, too, when you get water on them. You've never seen this before? I don't remember that part. They could have done that a long time ago. I don't remember any wizards. All right, well, that was great. Okay, that's going to wrap things up here. Okay, folks, well, hope you all enjoyed that. She did. You killed her. What the hell are you? I didn't mean to kill her. Really, I didn't. Just that he was on fire.
Hail to Dorothy, the wicked witch is dead. Hail to Dorothy, the wicked witch is dead. The broom. We have it. Please, and take it, wizard. Oh, thank you so much. Now we can go back to the wizard and tell him the wicked witch is dead. The wicked witch is dead, and I believe my eyes. Why have you come back? We've done what you told us. We brought you the broomstick of the wicked witch of the west. No wire hangers. Yes. We melted her. Oh, you little. Very resourceful. Not so fast. I'll have to give the matter a little thought. Go away and act tomorrow. Where are we supposed to stay tonight? You've had plenty of time already. Hello. If you are really powerful, you'll keep your promises. He's in that little photo.
All the great detectives are dogs. Joey, you're that guy that read my fortune. The pedophile. That'd be cool if we had that effect. Obviously, I don't speak to Chewa. You guys know where Sean is? You're a very bad man!
I'm a very good man. I'm just a... Somebody needs to let him know we're still in the air. What about the heart that you promised Tin Man? And the courage that you promised Cowardly Lion Man? Scarecrow's day. Eddie, he's walking around in his underwear. He's walking around in his underwear in the lobby. That is really weird. Back where I come from, we have university seeds of great learning, where men go to become great thinkers. All right, guys. Yeah, I mean, isn't that kind of a feat? Yeah, like, are you guys kind of, like, in your head right now, rationalizing how bad it could be weighing that up against the reward of sleep? Yeah, yeah. I tore my tape. I pulled my labia. Some of the square roots are many two sides of my saucy-square angles. Fine, I ripped mine. Sorry. Oh, George! I've got a brain! How can I ever thank you enough? Well, you can. As you, my fine friends, you are a victim of disorganized thinking.
Yeah, you don't have a thing. I'm the Tin Man. She doesn't have a heart. You're the Lion, Eddie. If you were the Tin Man, she wouldn't be able to flood her apartment. Hey! Hey! Extraordinary valance. Conspicuous bravery against wicked witches. I award you the triple cross. You are now a member of the Legion of Metal. All right, President Bush. Shucks, folks, I'm speechless. It's the last politically incorrect joke in the night. Come on, guys. You want a heart. You don't know how lucky you are. It's 1.52 a.m. What do you want? If I wasn't so worried about Sean, I'd laugh at that. That's where I come from. There are men who do nothing all day but good deeds. They are called good deed doers. And their hearts are no bigger than yours. But they have one thing you haven't got. A testimonial.
Therefore, in consideration of your kindness, I take pleasure at this time in presenting you with a small token of our esteem and affection. And remember, my sentimental friend, that the heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others. This whole time we've been watching the flavor of love. Keep it going. Yes. It ticks. Wait till the black girl deprecates on the floor. See the guy on the right? Yeah. Dead. Ain't it the truth? Ain't it the truth? I'm not so glad about that. Oh, they're all wonderful. Hey! There won't be a sequel. What about that? Yes, how about Dorothy? Yeah. Dorothy next. Yeah, Dorothy. Ah, here comes Sean. I don't think there's anything in that black bag for me. We should leave milking cookies out for him. Well, you forced me into a cataclysmic decision. The only way to get Dorothy back to Kansas is for me to take her there myself. Ah, yes. Oh, really, pedophile? Oh, wait. I've heard that one before. You're banned. Yeah. With the back windows all blacked out. Are you a clever enough wizard to manage this? Child, you cut me to the quick. I'm an old Kansas man myself. I'll tell you what. Instead of returning you back to Kansas, why don't you just make the movie end? You still have to fly in that beautiful balloon. No, I don't want it. And probably sing another song or two. No. Never before attempted by civilized man. I think someone cried. The balloon failed to return to the fair. I can't wait until you know what happened.
Riding? You are talking to a man who has laughed in the face of death. I heard smart guys. Oh, wait, that was the last one. What? Yeah, where am I? Eddie, I have a legitimate question. Oh, this is not. This is not going to be a legend. How much would someone have to pay you to wear those red shoes out on the street corner for a bet? Retaining my balloon against the axis of a quick guess away. Go ahead and answer the question. The legitimate question in St. Paul. at 2 a.m. in the morning. Go!
assisted by the tin man by two of his magnificent and the liar by virtue of his kind absolutely i can't wait for this but once this is ended we get back in the studio and do a little uh i hope we have a plan oh hey we got tons of stuff okay because i this is my dance song harley no six o'clock i'll be back yeah Yes, you can. Run around and walk out. He's going back on his walkabout. Stay with us then, Dorothy. We all love you. We don't want you to go. That's very kind of you. But this could never be like Kansas. Stop wondering what happened to me by now. I'm scared, Crow. What am I going to do? Look.
Here's someone who can help you. Not that stupid bubble again. Enough of you. Is that the prince bubble again? That's right. It's Skye, the good witch of Escondido. Shut up. That's how she comes in every morning. You don't need to be helped any longer. You've always had the power to go back to Kansas. I have. That's right. You just fought yourself back. She had to learn it for herself. What have you learned, Dorothy? That you're an idiot. That it wasn't enough just to want to see Uncle Henry and Auntie Anne. And it's that if I ever go looking for my heart's desire, I won't look any further than my own backyard. Right, right, the reference. I never really lost it to begin with. Is that right? That's all it is. But that's so easy. I should have thought of it for you.
I should have felt it in my heart. No, she had to find it out for herself. Now those magic slippers will take you home in two seconds. Oh, Toto, too? Toto, too? There, Teddy, too. Love, whenever you wish. Oh, there. That's too wonderful to be true. You know, you're holding a stuffed animal. It's got a space so hard to sacrifice. What are you, Vietnamese? Whoa. Whoa. Okay. Bring it on. Okay. Fresh as a daisy. Where's Sean? I would never have found it if it hadn't been for you. I think I'll miss you most of all. Sean, they're playing with your sound effects. Sound effects. Oh, now he's extra pissed. Are you ready now? Yes. Say goodbye, Toto. Dead dog. Yes, I'm ready now. Then close your eyes and tap your heels together three times. I want this movie to end. I want this movie to end. I want this movie to end. It's not working. Just keep doing it.
I want this movie to end. Close your eyes. Wake up, honey. Where's Oscar? Nothing funnier, Blender. Hello there. Anybody home? I just dropped by. I heard the little girl got caught. I'm the pedophile. May I come in? I've been registered. I've got no pants on. You're first. Yeah, you're that retard. Corky, right?
And you were there. You couldn't have been, could you? But we dream lots of silly things when we... No, Aunt Em, this was a real, truly live place. Remember that some of it wasn't very nice, but most of it was beautiful. But just the same, all I kept saying to everybody was, I want to go home. Ah, mental illness. And they sent me home. That's awesome. Dream come true. Of course we believe, you know. But anyway, Toto, we're home. Home. And this is my room. And you're all here. We're going to leave here ever, ever again. You know what else is a good dream? The Red Sox winning the World Series again. Hey, guys, only 84 more years. That was really great. Let's never do it again. All right. Priceman, hit the legal. Are you awake? All right. You're listening to the 28-hour Mikey Marathon. Brought to you by Fox 6 News. On KIOZ, San Diego's rock station. Rock 105.3. The following takes place between 2 a.m. and 3 a.m. But right now, ladies and gentlemen, it is time for Eddie to do some healing. Why does Eddie do tough love with Eddie? Because he shoots from the hip. He doesn't placate people.
Tells them the truth. Why are you staring at me?