All shows / 28 Hour Show 2006 - Rock 105.3
28 Hour Show - 2006 - Hour 20
2006
28 Hour Show 2006 - Rock 105.3KIOZRock 105.3
Celebrity autographsBarbie collectingAspiring actorsRyan Leaf petitionDaily routinesWork dissatisfactionMarriage and family lifeBridezilla weddingsSleep habitsListener call insautographscelebrity culture
The show features hosts Eddie and Mikey responding to listener letters and calls. Topics include a listener, P1 Matt, asking if collecting celebrity autographs is 'brokeback,' which Eddie vehemently dismisses as 'gay.' Another listener, P1 Jeremy, a 40-something Barbie collector living at home, seeks advice on his hobby, prompting Eddie to launch into a harsh tirade, calling him a 'disaster.' P1 Marshall, an aspiring actor, is told by Eddie to give up his dream and focus on his 'real job.' Later, Boston Rob conducts a 'Ryan Leaf Petition' bit, gathering overwhelmingly negative fan reactions to bringing back the former Chargers quarterback. The hosts then share their detailed, often humorous, daily routines, revealing personal habits and work frustrations, culminating in Mikey's comedic breakdown over a friend's elaborate 'bridezilla' wedding itinerary.
What happened, in order
Celebrity Autographs: Brokeback or Cool?
P1 Matt from Oceanside asks if collecting celebrity autographs is 'brokeback,' leading Eddie to call him 'Fagcess Hollywood' and advise him to get a life.
Barbie Collector's Dilemma
P1 Jeremy from Del Mar, a 40-something Barbie collector living at home, seeks advice after his mother tells him to get rid of his collection, blaming his short stature on her genes.
Eddie's Barbie Collector Rant
Eddie calls Jeremy 'Shrimp and the Barbies,' a 'disaster,' compares him to Smithers, and threatens him with 'brutality treatments' to make him a man.
Actor's Dream vs. Wife's Reality
P1 Marshall from Linda Vista, an aspiring actor, asks for advice as his wife wants him to focus on his 'real job,' prompting Eddie to tell him to give up his dream and settle down.
The Ryan Leaf Petition
Boston Rob attempts to gather signatures for a petition to bring back former Chargers quarterback Ryan Leaf, eliciting overwhelmingly negative and often vulgar reactions from fans.
Eddie's Daily Routine
Eddie describes his structured day, including waking at 4 am, showering, working, calling his wife, remaking his sandwich, napping on the couch, cooking dinner, and rearranging the dishwasher.
Sky's Daily Routine
Sky details her early morning routine, including waking before her alarm, peeing multiple times, speeding to work, grunting at Eddie, and her post-show activities like acupuncture and jacuzzi baths.
Sean's Daily Routine and Frustrations
Sean shares his early morning routine and expresses deep dissatisfaction with his job, co-workers, building, and boss, admitting he hates the bulk of his day.
Boston Rob's Daily Routine
Boston Rob outlines his day, including showering at night, not washing his hair for two months, watering plants (including a 'guacamole tree'), going to the gym, and cooking dinner with his lady.
Ashley's Daily Routine
Ashley describes her morning, including neck stretches for stress (aspires to be a hip-hop dancer), baking, and a detailed (and disputed) timeline of getting ready and arriving at work.
Mikey's Daily Routine
Mikey shares his routine, including a lengthy morning 'deuce,' cold water on his face, napping for 'Jake duty,' computer work, Jake's bath, and taking Unisom sleep gel nightly for 10 years.
Mikey's Bridezilla Itinerary Breakdown
Mikey discusses a six-page, minute-by-minute itinerary for a friend's wedding, which he finds incredibly demanding and indicative of a 'bridezilla,' leading to a comedic mental breakdown.
People mentioned
EddieMikeySeanScottSkyeBoston RobAshleyP1 Matt in OceansideP1 Jeremy from Del MarP1 Marshall in Linda VistaNumiRobP1 DianeP1 The IrishmanP1 TavernP1 Pogger fanP1ARDebraBunny BooBig Al KahunaRebeccaJake
7,755 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
Because I love you. That's odd. And I want to help you. I didn't think you had a heart. Well, you're wrong. At least he doesn't call his friends Santa. Yes, he doesn't have a heart. Huh? Doesn't know how to love his friends. That's right. A black heart. Our first letter reads, Dear Eddie, do you think it's broke back that I get celebrity autographs? My roommate told me it's gay, but I think it's a cool hobby. I work in L.A. part-time with a production company and get a chance to get a lot of cool ones. If I met you or someone from the show, I would definitely want an autograph. What is your take on that? Signed, P1 Matt in Oceanside. Eddie? Dear Fagcess Hollywood. What, Eddie? Yeah, yes, you are gay. You know how Mikey reads people? I mean, he's one Cosmo subscription away from peeing sitting down. Now, you, on the other hand, you're a desperate housewife, okay? What? I mean, if you want an autograph from Nick Lachey, you're Nick LaGay. Do something productive with your time, dude. Like, I don't know, talk to girls.
I mean, even Ryan Seacrest pretends to have a set. Okay. Chasing around celebrities is not cool. It makes you look like a dork, okay? And if you have to do it, keep it to A-listers. I mean, that Judge Judy you have in your little autograph book? Not impressive, bro. You don't know that he has Judge Judy. Neither is your Tim Conway and Harvey Korman. Okay. I mean, who are you, Rupert Pumpkin? That was for you, Sean. Yeah, great. In conclusion, you're a sad and lonely little boy. Get a life and enjoy my 8x10. You don't know any of that. He could be getting one celebrity autograph. You don't know. I do know. How do you know? His roommate told me. Our next letter reads, Hey, Eddie, I'm a 40-something man. I still live at home. Never had a girlfriend, but always wanted one. And am an avid Barbie collector. Oh, come on. Now, hold on, everyone. Now, hold on. Let me hear this out. My mother and I got in the biggest fight the other day because she was telling me to get rid of my collection so that I might possibly get a woman. Please. I told her that my biggest problem is not the Barbies at all.
It's her stupid genes that I inherited. She's only 4 foot 11 and I'm 5 foot 3 and 3 quarters. Stop it, everyone. No average height woman wants to date a man that's the same height as B-Rob. Oh, no. Oh, no. Shot below the belt. Plus, and yes, this next sentence is real. Are you ad-libbing? No, I am not. That would not be cool. The next sentence says, Plus, my Barbies are my life. I would never get rid of them. Eddie, what can I do? Please help. Signed, did he really put his name? Signed, P1 Jeremy from Del Mar. Eddie? No, I don't think there's anything wrong with what he's doing.
Dear Shrimp and the Barbies. You're a disaster. You're a disaster. A 5'3 Barbie collector who lives at home with his mommy. Are you kidding? Is this a rejected script from The Office? Is this Smithers from The Simpsons? I mean... Stop it. Holy crap, dude. You're screwed. I'm just kidding. No, wait. I'm not kidding. You're screwed. It's probably worth a lot of money. Oh, my God. Scott, please be quiet. Let me help. Scott, there's still time. Shut up. I can sit with this guy. Stop. My biggest regret right now is that I threw away the envelope that this letter came in because I can't track you down and kick your ass. Not to worry, though, that I've hired a guy that used to work as muscle for King Stallman bail bonds. He says he can fight anyone in 24, 48 hours and then kick their ass in 24, 48 seconds. But don't be scared because if you survive...
you're going to be on your way to becoming a man. And who knows, you may only take a handful of these, what I call, brutality treatments in order for you to start functioning in society. Good luck, my lady friend. What's the difference between collecting Barbies and collecting Star Wars toys? Oh, my. They have a vagina. They are both toys, and I think you should accept it. Really ridiculous. Well, no, I'm just accurate. Glad I could help. Next letter, please. Our next letter reads, Dear Eddie, I have a little problem and need your sage advice. Ah, yes. I have always wanted to be an actor. It is my life's dream. I think I have the chops for it. I've done some local theater and I've gotten positive reviews. I don't know why that's funny. Well, it's because I can see the tide coming in. I know. I see the wave and I'm screaming, get away! I've also done some extra work and was even in one feature film. Here is the problem. I'm married now and my wife thinks I need to focus more time on her.
And my real job. But I'm not ready to give up my dream yet. What should I do? Signed, P1 Marshall in Linda Vista. Wait a second. Eddie? Marshall. I don't think it's Marshall. I think I know who wrote this. Dear Yahoo Sirius. What? Dude! I want your movie! I can't remember the name of it, but man, you were great. What the hell happened to you? For all you young kids listening, this guy was in a movie back in the 80s that was like the worst flop in Hollywood history, never to be seen again. You don't know that's him. People dog this guy horribly. I mean, they were calling him Yahoo, you can't really be serious and awesome stuff like that. Wow. Now you're married? Good for you, guy. We don't know that. But alas, your wife is right. It's time for you to give up, my man. I mean, settle down. Make little failed actors.
Okay. You know what I mean? That's not cool. It's that dream, Eddie. Listen, Scott, walking around in the background of silk stockings is not a career make. Okay? Oh, man. But look at it this way, Yahoo. Hang on now. Look at it this way, Yahoo. The dope in the first letter definitely wants your autograph. That must feel good. That must feel good. Not cool crushing a man's dream. Now punch in and get back to working off his depot, Yahoo. Who are you to crush this guy's dream? I just helped it. No, you did not. God, you're so mean. Oh, there she blows. God, that pisses me off. Skye. I wish you were a bigger star, too, Skye. I'm pissed as well. Yahoo was great. Skye, can you hear it coming up Washington Street? Just please shut up. There it is. It's the sound of healing. You're welcome, Yahoo Serious.
How about that? Yeah. That's right. A classic. That's right. It's a classic. It's a classic. Yeah, I hate that segment. Let's take some phone calls. It is 2.13. How long have we been going? Now, I've got to tell you, I've been up for 24 hours now. This is about the time I woke up yesterday. This is about the time I woke up yesterday. Mikey Show. Sounds like fun. Hey, what's up? What's up? Who's this? This is Mikey. Mikey, I thought you were sleeping. This is the one, Numi, coming from you, from coming home from the boss. I just want to say, I think you guys are hilarious, and I hope you guys stay up wickedly and hilarious. Thank you. Oh, no, we're going to get all the drunkies called. Yeah, let's get the thing on. Yeah, we've got to get the delay ramped back up. So, Mikey, you want the questionnaire replay?
Now, remember we talked earlier? Yeah. And you said that you had all these ones ready to go? Yes. Okay, just start putting them up for me. Well, okay. You don't have them yet? No, I haven't. I just wanted to confirm that was the one you wanted. Yeah, yeah, just get them up. The Mikey questionnaire. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And other cool stuff. Other cool stuff that people may have missed. Cool stuff, cool stuff. Who loves the cool stuff? Everyone loves cool stuff. Who loves the cool stuff? Eddie loves the cool stuff. Yeah, I'm right I do. So, Chino Moreno did not call back. Unless he called back while we were in the other room. Don't know. I never saw the inside line ring. Our number here, 570-1053. And, I don't know, you can call us about whatever. We got, what do we got, eight hours? Less than eight hours. Seven hours, 45 minutes. Cakewalk. And this time, you know, a lot of times we'll get off at 1030 in the morning. Yeah, sometimes we go a little bit long. Sky, it's an infomercial. What is that? Where's that girl's gone wild infomercial? Yeah, I normally don't watch TV at two in the morning. I didn't realize. Oh, this one's a good one. Where's the TV? I just spit. Whoa. Where did the thing? So did she.
Okay. Are you going to rewind it? That's what she says. Okay. Sean, get the number down. Don't hit me. Look at that. Wow. Look, they're floating in space. They're floating in space. They were. They were in one of those planes that like. Yeah. Well, when girls come wild, they go wild in outer space. Mikey Show. Hello. Who's that? This is Mikey. What do you think? I was just calling in to say thanks for letting me come in and share the two hours with you and the Wizard of Oz. I think you guys are doing a great job and what you're doing is awesome. Not when you answer the phone that way. Oh, I'm sorry we offended you. That was Sean, and we have to apologize for him. Who does he think it is? He's very tired. Sometimes Rob answers the phone. Well, most of the time Rob answers the phone. That's right. Rob answers the phone. I just want to say I was on my way. I'm going to be asleep in about five minutes. I just want to say. Rub it in. Yeah, rub it in. Well, Sean, you guys are the best. Thank you. Thank you. Appreciate the phone call. Mikey Show.
Is this Mikey? Yes, it is. What's up, Mike? What's going on? Sean. Hey, you played a song the other morning. You said it was like, I guess you said it was like your zen-like state, and you said you like to put on some herbal tea and listen to that song. I don't know what that song is. Oh, that was Incubus. What song? Incubus. Oh, really? Is that the name of the song? I think the name of the song is Acquiesce Transmission. I think you are correct, my friend. Uh-huh. That got weird. Wow. Wow, it's... All right, thank you for the call. Yeah, I appreciate it. Can you just not? You can't take calls at this time? I guess not. Well, it's... Very strange. Like, for sure, you can't take them? I like the late, late with Mike show. It's just a bummer. I'd like to be able to take calls. Yeah, me too. Like what, because it's 2 a.m., you can't be a P1? No, that's not it. It's just that nobody, you know, is articulate. Nobody's making any sense. Mikey Show. Hi, this is P1 Diane. I want to comment about the Wizard of Oz. Uh-huh. It just sounded rather pornographic. My husband and I were listening to it, and we didn't watch the video at the same time. And we walked out of the room, and it just totally sounded pornographic. Oh, those munchkins, they get crazy. That's right.
All right. Thank you. Thank you. Oh, boy. Boy. Well, we've got a lot of stuff that we didn't do throughout the day that we could do. Yeah, let's do it. Do you have any late night stuff, Sky? Like sometimes we have, do we do any of those, you know, Cosmo polls or any of that stuff? No, I didn't bring any, but I could probably find some online. We got a ton of stuff. Yeah, we do. We do. Are you confident with men? Did the Bridezilla guy come in? I don't think so. I don't think he did either. The Bridezilla guy was going to be interesting. Man, we've got to go over the itinerary. I have it. It's just that's good stuff, man. I don't want to waste it at 2 o'clock in the morning. We've also got what you're doing at the courthouse. Oh, you know what I want to hear? I'll tell you what I want to do. I want to hear the Ryan Leaf petition stuff. What is it called? It's all in the shortcut.
Under petition. Short kit. Short kit. I love the short kit. All right, let's see. And it's called what? It's just petition, and then there's a number after each one. Basically, the idea is that we sent Boston Rob to the parking lot at the Charger games. And we had him talk to people, and we said we've got to tell them something really goofy to get people's reaction. So we decided that we were going to start telling people that we wanted to get a petition going to get Ryan Leaf back. Just to judge people's reactions. Here's what happened. A lot of things are wrong with the charges right now, right? Yeah, Marty is. You think Marty's a problem? Marty Ball. All right. Well, you guys signed my petition to bring back Ryan Leaf. No. He's way better than Ryan Leaf. Where is Ryan Leaf? I thought I seen him in Southeast smoking. Seriously.
Southeast smoking? I don't know what that means. I don't either. Not good, whatever it is. Whatever it is, it can't be good. Smoking. Was that a brother? Oh, yeah. Is there another guy? There's been a lot of problems with the charges going on and off the field concerning suspensions, all that with the players. Would you sign my petition to bring back Ryan Leaf? Absolutely not. Ryan Leaf was the biggest queer in the world. Wow. What a take, right? What's with the hate? Interesting take. I'll tell you what, the San Diego, the San Diego, like young men in San Diego, they can be brutal. Brutal. Let it go, man. Let's have him back. Yeah. Welcome him with open arms. I'm back in the organization. We could even put him in a cheerleader outfit and just get him back. I think having him around might.
Lift spirits. You wouldn't sign my petition? I would not. In a million years, I thought he absolutely ruined team chemistry and he was the biggest biatch in the world. No. Wow. Sounds like people don't want the great Ryan Leaf back. What with that? Yeah, what is up with that? I mean, I thought people would be clamoring. Shocking. A lot of negative reactions out there. What's up with that? I don't know. I'm trying to start a petition to get the one man back that I think could turn everything around. Would you guys sign my petition for Ryan Leaf? Ryan Leaf? Wow. Whoa. Wow. Right in my face. Wow. I mean, very strong reactions. Yeah. Sounds like most of them were positive. Very passionate, very positive. Visceral, you might say. There's been a lot of things going wrong for the Chargers this season so far off the field. Would you agree? I would agree. That's awesome. So, would you sign my petition and bring back Ryan Leaf? Yeah, right. Negative.
False. Negative. Would you sign my petition to bring back Ryan Lee? Shut up. Negative. Hell no. He doesn't even need to play. We could put him on the coaching staff. Hell no. I don't know if he'll do my yard work. Hell no. You always got the one guy in the background going, He's like the guy that threw the brick at Denny what's-his-name's head during the riots in Los Angeles. He's like that guy. Did you sign my petition to bring back Ryan Leaf? I will not sign the petition to bring back Ryan Leaf. Even if we just get him back in the organization. I don't care if we'll maybe get him on the coaching staff, quarterbacks coach, something like that. I say that Ryan Leaf was one of the worst deals that the Chargers have ever made.
in charge of history. And if you bring him back, I will start a coalition to pound Ryan Leaf anytime he steps foot on this Qualcomm Stadium field. Well, looks like no change in your mind. Can I have some nachos then? Please, enjoy. My fellow nerds and I will retire to the nerdery with our calculators. Did you get one person that was okay with it? Um, no. Not one person was like, okay. I'll sign that. I thought maybe one dum-dum would be like, okay, sure. Sign my petition to bring back Ryan Leaf. No, no. What kind of petition is that? What if we brought him back maybe as the new mascot? We got him running around in the field at halftime. If we could beat him up. Ryan Leaf is so f***ing f***ing f***ing. Send him around in the stadium. F*** that guy. Get the f*** out of that guy. Oh, my. F*** Ryan Leaf. Ryan Leaf is a pile of f***ing f***ing.
Are you sure? Jeez. Second thoughts? Swearing is so funny. It's a brutal audience, man. Where'd you get this audio from, Deadwood? I'm kidding. That was very funny. I still got it. 2.24 in the morning. Dude, I don't know how you do it, man. I'm telling you. In the HBO show. What? Sean? Sean, are you with us? Someone. Any show that HBO produces, they all swear like hell. Sean is officially my favorite. Officially. They all swear.
So Paul Lind, apparently? Yeah. Stop your filthy mouth. I swear to God, I'll slap it right off. Curve your enthusiasm. Soprano. They're all very cussy. Yeah. Carnival. Six feet under. They all dip into the cuss jar. Wash your mouth out with soap. Wash your mouth out with cuss. Yeah. Your poo-poo mouth. Your little cock-a-mouth. Yeah. Yeah. Your little feces talker. What the heck? Weird. Best one yet. Feces talker. Here's your blah-blah. We're drunk. Yes. I love it. I need a nap. It's just strange what happens to the human body when you've been awake for a long time. What happens to the brain? You know what I mean? It gets funny. See, this is the time where decisions should be made at high levels on North Korea. You know what I mean? I mean, it's like...
In this day and age, you can't even get together with a 250-pound male in a one-man swing with just a Pittsburgh Steeler hat on facing each other without the general public calling you weird or gay. Genitals. Two grown men can't feed each other crunch berries. Mouth to mouth. Wow. Sipping on gin and juice. Ah, laid back. In a treehouse. Sipping on gin and juice. Yeah. Wearing a tutu. Having anal sex. All right. You know what?
There we go. Take off all your clothes. Shut up. I love you. Mama said knock you out. George Bush doesn't care about black people. What? Is that true? Wow. Is that true? Well, Kanye said it. George Bush hates midgets. So what do you guys think? You want to watch Wizard of Oz again? Wow. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable. And I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Anybody? Wow. What's going on? I don't know. It's crazy right now. I got something for us to do, and this will keep us awake. This will be good. Bring it on, Donkey Kong. We are going to do our daily routines. We've done this before on the air, and it's kind of entertaining. We're going to do our daily routines. We're going to basically walk you through what we do every day.
And hopefully we will find something to discuss from it. Because our daily routines have changed. You know, I'm married now and I have a son now. And so the daily routine, I'm married now. And so the routines change. So, Eddie, let's start with you. Oh, great. I like it. There you go, Eddie. Yeah. Get it. What time do you get up? 4 o'clock. 4 a.m. You wake up with the alarm or? I always, almost always wake up at 3.30 and look at the clock and go, oh, man, I only got like a half hour left. Roll over. Sometimes fall asleep right away. Give Sean a peck on the cheek. Nudge him. Almost time to get up, sweetie. Then, yeah, either I'll wake up right before it or to it. You wake up to radio clock or you wake up to an alarm. I have a battery.
powered alarm clock all my radio career and has never let me down. And so it does the old eh, eh, eh, eh, eh. And I jump right out of it. Oh, dude. Immediately. How long does it sound? Two beeps. That's it? And I'm on it. Nice. And I jump up. Jeez. If I don't, then I'd fall right back to sleep. Okay. So I jump up, jump in the shower, always, always have to shower. Usually out the door by... About 425. And we hit the station literally five to seven minutes later. I don't live very far. So get the station, roll in, get my usual weird noise from Sky when I walk into the office. What is that? That's it. That's my acknowledgement for the morning. Sit down at the computer. Get the show stuff ready. Come in here, do the show.
Depending on what day it is, I'd say my average leave time is probably about 12, in between 12 and 1. So then I usually will go straight home. Always call the woman on the way home. Really? Yeah. Because she's working. Yeah. And normally get her, talk a little bit all the way home. I usually have to remake my sandwich. What do you mean? What? Well, I usually am not happy with my sandwich. Are you talking about your sandwich you're bringing for breakfast? Yeah. Yeah, and I usually hate it. So you didn't eat it? If I don't like it, I'll usually eat a part of it just to, you know, sustain me. Right. And so I'm usually hungry by the time I get home, and I will make the sandwich the way I like it. So then I'll usually eat a sandwich. And I'll start watching probably either Food Net or something that I have had TiVo that Debra doesn't care about. And I'll start watching that. And usually about halfway through whatever I'm watching, I'll start to get sleepy. And I used to go upstairs and take naps in my bed. And I stopped doing that ever since I lived in this place. And I take naps on the couch now.
It's too much of an effort. Once I'm falling asleep to get up and go upstairs, then I'm awake by the time I walk upstairs. So I usually crash out on the couch for anywhere between an hour or two hours, get up, immediately put it on ESPN, and watch everything that's going on on ESPN for probably a good hour. Then I go upstairs and... get on the computer and check my email and do all that stuff, usually work stuff. And that's usually going on until Debra gets home about 5. When she gets home, it's the annual conversation of, whoa, what should we make for dinner? What do you want for dinner, honey? Oh, dinner. I'll cook dinner tonight. No, you cook dinner tonight. Great, great, great. Dinner, dinner, dinner talk. That goes on incessantly. Usually... I'd say about 90% of the time I cook dinner. And so, you know, I cook dinner until about whatever, depending on what time I start. Usually dinner is about 6 o'clock. Cook dinner for some reason. I end up cleaning usually too. Really? Sometimes. I mean, sometimes you'll do it. You know, I just like things done my way. Really? So I don't even mind. I get that. You know, I just, I don't know.
I don't like the way she puts the dishes away in the dishwasher. Really? She never used to use a dishwasher. She would clean everything by hand. And so now she puts them in the dishwasher. She doesn't put them in so it's like space efficient. It bothers. And I always rearrange the dishwasher. Really? Yeah. And so I just end up doing it myself because I don't want to get into a whole thing like, hey, babe, if you put the... bowls like this. I mean, come on. Give me a break. How many times can I say that? So, I just usually end up doing it myself. Then, by that time, it's done. Then, we usually start watching shows. Either we have T-Vode or we'll watch our primetime shows. By 10 o'clock, I'm done. Go to bed. The most boring man on the planet. Sky, give me your daily routine.
Get up at 3.30, alarm set for 3.45, but I am petrified of my alarm, so I automatically wake up at 3.30 every day and pray that I wake up before my alarm goes off. So it's about 3.30 that I get up. Wash my face, brush my teeth, get dressed. Pee three times. Oh, yeah, yeah. Ew. Yes, urinate multiple times. Without flushing. And then flush right before I leave. How does one... urinate multiple times. When you relieve your bladder, you've relieved your bladder. Not my bladder. Maybe it's sensitive in the morning. What does that mean? You relieve your bladder. Maybe it's nervous or warming up or something. Warming up. Yeah, but that's not the way the human body works. The human body releases its bladder. Then after the bladder is released, it's released. It's empty. You got me. Trying to think of something. Yeah. I don't know. I've just always been like that. See, pee-pee multiple times. Yeah, and it's weird because when I get to pee here, I'll go like two times here or two. At work? Yeah. I never noticed that. Yeah. Well, I'll go once. Like, I go make my cup of coffee, and then I go, Eddie knows my schedule in the office in the morning. Yeah. I, like, print out half my prep. Well, okay. So, yeah, I get up, brush teeth, blah, blah. You must never get urinary infections.
No. It's too much going on. Well, if you urinate a lot, women don't get urinary infections if they urinate all the time. Yeah, that's true. Getting flushed out constantly. That's right. And then I, you know, speed on into work. Speed is the operative word. It is the operative word. Well, come on. You get here, do your thing. I get here, get in the office, and he comes in. We get off the air at 10.30. I grunt. I go make my pot of coffee. and urinate again, and then come back, finish printing the second half of my prep. Okay, we don't need to go hour by hour. Then Mikey and I, so the show's over. I normally get out of here around 11-ish, get home. If I don't have any appointments, like, you know, dentist, acupuncture, whatever I got going on. Acupuncture is awesome. It's not meant to be funny, Sean. But it is. Whatever. So then the Bunny Boo. I just picture you like Pinhead laying there, you know. Absolutely. Needles all over the place. Everywhere, sticking out of my ears, the top of my head. Yeah. But anyways. Listening to some crummy New Age music. Yes. Yes, definitely. Symbols and chimes. Yeah. So then Bunny Boo and not. Stinking of Juniper.
And patchouli and sandalwood. All right. Everybody's sad. They're fun. Then Buddy Boo and I go through the lunchtime dance. That guy has a name. The lunchtime dance. Yeah, it's Buddy Boo. And we try and figure out what we're having for lunch. And then one of two things happens. Either it's a nap day or it is a workout day. And if it's a nap day, I enjoy myself a nap. If it's a workout day, I go work out and then I come home and I sit in my new jacuzzi bathtub, which I love and abuse. And then the boo always makes dinner. The boo's in charge of dinner. And so he like pretty much plans it. So I have no clue what's going on until I get up for my nap or I'm finished getting ready. And then we enjoy a lovely dinner. We watch things that were TiVo'd from most likely the night before. And if I have my way, I am starting to fall asleep at 7.30. Toledo. Yes. Wow, 7.30. Oh, dude. I go to bed so early now. Sean. Oh. What's your routine? I wake up at 2.50. I get my shower. 2.50? 2.50. 2.50. I try to get out the door between 3.30, 3.45.
Get to the station about 4.45. Do the show. 10 o'clock. Start working on stuff that I can't stand, man. I mean, stuff that means so little to my life. I hate it. And, man. I hate the people I work with. Let it out, buddy. Let it out. I hate the building that I'm in. Speak on it. I hate my boss. Whoa. It's not really a routine. Not really a routine. Preach it. Oh, you're right. So then you work. I usually leave about 5. I get home about 6.30, 7. Work on a couple things for the show. Say hello to the wife. Try and get something to eat. Watch half of something. And then go to bed about 8, 8.30. I'm out. Wow, that's great. Real good. Real nice. And you know what? The bulk of my day, I can't stand. That's right. It's a safe place, Sean. That's right, Sean. You can let us. It's like the safe tree. Oh, I didn't realize. Well, let's get into it.
Michael Erickson, you can kiss it, my friend. On one side and down the other. Thank you, thank you. Oh, don't forget the undercarriage. You can work that too. We got it, we got it. Let's move on. Okay, so Boston Rob, how's your day go? Oh, and Andy Drake. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, Sean. You can eat chunks. No more. No more. Doughbore. So, uh, B-Rob. Oh, Clarissa Stahl! No, dude. No, no, no, no. Come on. It's lost its luster. Wow. He's losing it. Okay. So, uh, yeah. As long as I don't sleep through my alarm, uh, I'm actually up right about 4.30 out the door shortly after because I shower at night, so. I just throw on whatever's called to me. You shower? Surprisingly, yeah. That is a fall-faced lie. I do not wash my hair, though. Okay. I do not do that. I haven't done it in about two months. That's a shock. Yeah, we find that so hard to believe. Ew. Then I put bee wax in my head. True. After work, get out of here around noon. I go home, depending on the day.
I will either water my plants all in my backyard, or I will go... Those are all weeds. No, that is untrue. I have an orange. I have an orange tree and a guacamole tree. You don't have a guacamole tree. Guacamole tree? You don't have a guacamole tree. Really, do you have a salsa tree, too? No. Do you have a salsa plant? That's ridiculous, Mike. I have a lemon tree. Guacamole's a dip. That's good. You should have the one camera guy come over. And then usually, since my brother's moved out here, I go to lunch with Big Al Kahuna, or we make lunch at home. All right. After that... Go ahead. After that, I will go to the gym and try to burn off every single calorie that I've consumed that day. We do believe that. Or so. And then... I will figure out with my lady if she wants to eat with me or if she's going to eat on her own. I usually never eat as much as her. That's untrue. And then if she decides to eat with me, I'll make us a nice little dinner and she helps out. We kind of do like the cooking together thing, which is nice. I've never had that before. And then after that, I try to wrap it up. Oh, I'll always check before I go to bed what's on the Travel Channel and Discovery Channel.
I have to see what shows are on there. What does Mikey do? Yes, Mike. Ashley's next. Whoa. I wake up at 345, do my neck stretches. Oh, wait, what? Wait a second. You do your neck stretches? Yeah, I do, Mikey. I carry a lot of my stress in my neck. Okay, so you get up at 345. Yeah, and I don't know. Oh, man, to be a fly on the wall. Yeah, and basically I, like, do a stretch where I go turn this way down. Arm, shoulder, forward, backwards. Looks real complex. And it wakes me up and it stretches and loses up my body because I, I don't know, I get a lot of my stress in my neck. You know, because I dance. Well, that is accurate. It's one of my passions. It is. I wish I could be a professional hip-hop dancer. Yeah, sometimes I dance and I bake. That too. First baking, then dance, then neck stretches. Okay, so then you wake up at 345, you do your neck stretches, then what? It's so simple when I get ready. I don't put makeup on. I just come to work. That's why I love Kevin. He's so simple. Excuse me. I'm not done. But I need to interrupt. Why? You get up at 345. Yeah. You don't get to work until 5 o'clock. 445-ish. Ashley, you do not. That's a lie. Sometimes 450. Sometimes 450. Sometimes 450 too.
My name's 4.54. Ashley, that's not true. You get here. I know what time you get here. Ashley, you get here at 5. No, I do not. Yes, you do. I would say, honestly, on an average day, I get here at 4.55. Between 4.50 and 4.55. So, five minutes. Sorry. Anyway, you get here at 5 o'clock. What takes you from 3.45 to 5 o'clock if it doesn't take you that long to get ready in the morning? Neck stretching? I will wash my face. I will brush my teeth. I'll do my neck stretches. I'll get dressed and put on lotion and perfume and deodorant, obviously, for my sweat pits. And then I'll make a lunch. Are you guys buying this? No. What do you not buy? I don't think anybody's buying it. It takes you an hour to do all that? No. And then I leave my house by like 425-ish because I go and get a coffee before I go to work. So I have like a whole procedure. And I take my time when I get ready in the morning. So that's it. And it takes me 12 minutes to get to work. So normally by the time I'm leaving 7-Eleven, it's like 4.35. And I get to work by like 5 o'clock. It's not always 5. I swear. It really isn't. 5 o'clock is when I'm like running late. I would say on average it's 4.50, 4.55-ish. I see you. Yeah. It is. It's not. So then you work. What time do you get out of here? We'll start.
Okay. Logging. What time do you get out of here? Because I don't want you to think that. I'll time card you from now on. That's cool because I'm confident in my statistics. Okay, so what time do you leave work? I leave work between 11.30 and 1, depending on my workload. Go home, watch a little TV until I fall asleep, go to the gym, maybe join someone for a little happy hour, maybe a little lunch date. And I'm in bed, getting ready for bed around, like, 8. Go to bed by, like, between 9 and 10. And I get to work at 4.50, 4.50. Oh, no. Oh, you're pissing me off. I do. No, I do. Shut up. Time card it. I will. Good. I'm here for you. I'm your assistant. I give 100%. She's securing her statistics, Eddie. I give 100%. Well, now. I love you. My schedule is I wake up at 4. And I take a shower the night before. So I wake up at 4 a.m. Oh, I feel nauseous. I wake up at 4 a.m. And when I get up, the first thing I do is a deuce. I've got to go. Listen, this is what men do. And after that's taken care of, that usually takes a couple hours.
Stop it. It's too much information, man. That's healthy, though. Well, a good one will. Then I go in and I put cold water on my face. I have to put two... Cold water. Ice cold water on the face. I usually put cold water in my apartment. Shut up, Sean. Thank you. Then I stop at Starbucks. I get a... Half decaf, half regular. No, I don't do any of that stuff anymore. I don't do any of that stuff anymore. Come over to the hetero side. Then I come into work. I get here about 5.30, 5.35. And Sky and I do our thing, do our show. And I usually get out of here 10.30 when the show wraps up. And on the way home, I will...
call my lovely wife and see if she needs anything for lunch or anything, pick up lunch, get home and try to get right to sleep because I have Jake duty. Oh, that's right. So I try to get right to sleep and I kind of do the thing that Eddie does. I turn on the TV and I watch the TV and it doesn't take long before my eyes start to get heavy. And when I feel it's the appropriate time, I take a nap. Two o'clock up, I have Jake for a couple of hours. Around about four o'clock, she takes Jake, and I am on the computer. Wow. Answering emails and doing the deal. Doing the deal? You know what that means. Yeah. That's right. Yeah, doing the deal. Nonstoptranny.com.
Aquarium. That's right, aquarium stuff, you know, whatever. Aquariumfag.com. I didn't say that, Sean. So then, Rebecca and I have dinner, and watch a little bit of TV, and then about 7, 7.30, somewhere in there, it's time to give Jake his bath. It is. It's a good bonding time for the whole family. And then she feeds him, and I take my sleep gel at 8 o'clock. What are you talking about? I take my Unisom sleep gel. Every night? Every night. Got to take one Unisom sleep gel. Otherwise, I will not get sleepy. Are you supposed to take it? Like, is it okay to take it every night? Yeah, I guess. I haven't died. I've been doing it for 10 years. Well, no, but there's nothing on the package that says...
Really? Ten years? Oh, man, I've been doing it forever. Wow, I never knew that. Yeah. I take my sleep gel at eight, and it usually gets me pretty tired within an hour. So about 9, 9.30, I can fall asleep, and then I'm awake 90 billion times between then and four because Jake wakes up or my wife moves a quarter of an inch. And that'll wake you? Oh, the slightest things wake me up. Oh, man. It's like my girlfriend. She wakes up real easy? On anything. Yeah. It's kind of a bummer. It sucks. Dude. It's kind of a bummer. Nothing wakes me. Nothing. Not even a flood. Oh, no. Eddie. What's up with what you said? How would a flood wake me? Nothing wakes me. Not even 30. Not even $13,000 worth of damage. It was like probably more than that. So shut up. Holy Toledo. Not even 300 cubic feet of water. I don't need to hear it. Not even the Germans floating by in a U-boat. Okay. Not even a life raft going through my living room. Not even Kevin Costner filming Waterworld 2. Shut up.
Not even Mikey considering making an aquarium out of my den. Who has a den these days? Especially in an apartment. Yeah. They're so common. Right off the foyer. Don't. Don't. Sky. Oh, no, I didn't. Uh-oh. I love having Sky between like 3 and 4 a.m. Loses her mind. It's awesome. Mikey Show. Oh, hello. P1 The Irishman. What's up, The Irishman? How you guys doing? You hanging in there? Ah, we're doing our best, man. Just wanted to call and say hi. I want you to know there's people supporting you out here. Thank you, bro. I appreciate that. Mikey Show. Hey, this is P1 Tavern. Just wanted to say congrats on going long, guys. Thank you. Thank you, Tavern. We appreciate that. She's a Mikey Show. Hey, Mikey. This is a P1 Pogger fan. Hi.
Yeah, what's up, dude? You're up late with Mike at night. Okay, cool. I'll take it. Five bucks? Sold. Deal. Told the banker I want a deal. Mikey Show. Hey, this is P1AR. What's up? I usually have to wait until 6 o'clock in the morning to listen to you guys because I'm up all night working. But it's great listening to you guys all night. It's just hilarious. Awesome. I wonder how many people have been with us since 6 a.m.? Great question. That is a far out question. I don't know that I believe them. It's a tough thing to do. We always get people that say they do, but man, that's a long time to be listening, right? Mikey Show. People in Miller time. I was there for movies and I'm along with the Bridezilla story. Oh, yeah. Were you actually here?
Yeah, I was there. I was there. Where were you? Who were you? I was there. I had the T-shirt with the tattoo on my right arm. I was there for the whole movie. I came at the end of loss. Sorry. I had to yawn. Big yawn. Big yawn. Big yawny. Dude, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I read the itinerary of the bride, the wedding that you're going to later today. Yeah, I thought that that would make you guys feel a little bit better about what lies ahead for you versus me. Do you know this woman, or are you going to be meeting her the first time this bride? Oh, I know her, and that's the problem. Well, she's great, at least from what I know. This didn't seem like something that would come from her. The itinerary is nuts. It's like 1.04 p.m., 1.05 p.m., 1.06 p.m. It's like six pages long. I mean, listen, how does she not think that she's not making a lot of enemies? Right? Well, you know, I don't know. Obviously, we blew a lot of ass at my friend. And, you know, he...
He kind of rolled with it, but finally he started to shoot back and said, you know, she took the itinerary from two different bridezillas and combined it into one. Get him, Mike. What is he doing? Oh, my gosh. He's punching thin air. I'm sorry. Mike is, like, in the middle of a mental breakdown. I'm listening. I find it fascinating about this itinerary. Get him. Be careful. Mikey just decided to start. Oh, he got in the eye. Oh, are you okay? How about we tie? Hey, listen, dude. That's what happened. Keep going. Yes. This is my weird time. Yeah, I love it. I have a hard time now. I took off because... To be honest, Sean was scaring me. I know it. He was wandering through the building. Like he is right now. Aimlessly about... Oh, get him, Mikey. Suck him, punch him, punch him to the right, right, right. Uppercut, uppercut. I think the best part of the whole itinerary is, you know, it goes to 1.53 p.m., 1.55 p.m. But then at the very beginning, it says, please be available at a minimum of approximately five minutes prior to the...
to that time. Yeah, that's brutal. So, hey, that's what I had to look forward to. So, you know, I'll be on a flight to Akron. Mikey. Well, I feel for you. Good luck. That's going to be tough. Good luck. I feel for you. Yeah, get it. Yeah. Get it. I think I love you. Thank you. We'll talk to you later. All right, have fun. We'll see you. You're listening to the 28-hour Mikey Marathon. Brought to you by Fox 6 News. On KIOZ, San Diego's rock station. Rock 105.3. The following takes place between 3 a.m. and 4 a.m. I want to let people hear. Holy crap. Holy crap. It wasn't supposed to happen. No, you didn't. Okay, I want to let people hear. A little something that took place on the Mikey Show today. For those of you that didn't get to hear this, we did something called the Mikey Show Questionnaire. Take a listen.