The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 01/26/12

0:21Ladies that want to dance with L.O.B. You know what I'm saying? L.O.B. is going to be dancing at the House of Blues. It's going to be fantastic. Are you nervous? I will be, I'm sure. One of her dreams is to live her life out as a pussycat doll. And she said that the window for doing that is slowly closing. Are you training? You know what? I bought the Pussycat Dolls workout DVD and humiliated myself. Oh, my God. What do you mean you're humiliated? What do you mean? Well, it was, excuse me, it was a little advanced. Really? Yeah, they jumped like, I think I bought one that was not like the start of the series. And they kept being like, you know this move. And then just like yelling things out. Oh, wow. That you were supposed to do. I was like, what is that? What is that? You're going to be great.

1:22She'd be great. And here's what we found out. You know, she L.O.B. is 31 years of age and said that window is closing. We found out there's a lot of women that feel like L.O.B. They want to do the same thing. They want to dance like a pussycat doll. And so if you are a girl that would like to participate, we're going to do this in a live broadcast from the House of Blues. And if you're a gal that would like to participate. then what we need you to do is go to MikeyShow.com, and you'll see a thing there that says L-O-B, Dancing Like the Pussycat Dolls, and you just go there, and you can fill out a little form, and you can get in, and you can be up on stage with the L-O-B dancing it up. I think I picked out a song. You did? Mm-hmm. What is it? You don't want to say it. You don't want it to be a surprise? I do. Surprise. Just wait. Wouldn't they want to know? So maybe they can already start shaking their thing to it. The girls will know. It's a surprise for the audience. Girls will know. Okay. So the ladies will know and we will all be surprised. And you know what else is going on that day? The drag race. Which is our boy Woods and our boy Jay dressed in drag racing. Perfect. It's hard to run in high heels. Woods is used to it.

2:45Yeah, Woods runs in high heels now. Yes, I always wear high heels. I'm Mikey. Woods is sitting right across from me. Lauren O'Brien, L-O-B, is over here to my right. You just reading Facebook over there? I am going through the log. This is a commercial log. Guy's just giggling. He's looking up at the screen. I'm giggling at her because she's so mean. You know what's funny is that Jacef R. Isbell is actually the guy that came up with this idea for the drag race. Yes. Guy wants to dress in drag. In the worst. Real bad. In the worst way. In the worst way. I just thought it'd be funny. He'll come up with anything to wear a bikini. Panties. Put on girls clothes. Yeah. Guy loves panties. Oh yeah, I forgot about the bikini. Did you return that bikini? Yes. Anything. He wants a dress, hose, the whole thing. Mike, I have an idea.

3:45What if we did a bit where I just dress like a girl for a week? For a week. Stop. J. Edgar Hoover in there. Easy access to the girl's locker room if he does that. Oh, yeah. That must be it. And Nicole is our phone screener. She is 19. Hey, Nicole, we had a compliment about you yesterday. We said for a 19-year-old girl, you got a lot of chutzpah because you come in here. And you're, like, ready to go. You're on time. You're prepared. Thank you. That was my compliment, actually. So you guys can take credit for it if you want. She's got a smile on her face. Ready to go. It's perfect. Thought we were a team. Yeah. No, I a team. I said, you know, I've got to give it to that Nicole. Yeah, yeah. Jay said the same thing. I've got to give it to that Nicole. Which, in a different context, was very creepy. And different things, though. For sure. He's 30 years older than you. Yeah.

4:45Jay has granddaughters younger than you. In all honesty, Nicole is only older than one of Jay's kids, and that's his eight-year-old son. That's true. Oh, yeah, girl. Old enough to be my great-granddaughter. Which is my favorite. That's right. It's my favorite. I'm just an old guy. Is there anything wrong with a guy just sitting in a rocking chair drinking from a baby bottle? In real high black socks. What's so wrong with an oversized cradle? Yeah. It's for lovemaking. Is that weird? What's so weird about that? It's just weird. What's so weird about me wearing cloth diapers? It's just weird in jail. Yeah. It takes a lot to weird me out. It does. That is weird. 570-1949 if you want to call us up and say hello. We would love to talk to you. By the way, Woods is now on day number four of no Facebook. I'm done. You can't be done. I want to be done. I know. I want to throw in the towel. Got to go a full week. Do I? Well, that was the agreement. No, he said he can quit. He's going to try. Oh, he said he can quit? I mean, I thought it was just a challenge.

6:09It was, but I mean, the whole deal is you got to go a week. I don't want to go a week. I hate it. Twitter sucks. Oh, I love Twitter. It's not the same. God, is everybody showing off how bright they are? Is that what Twitter is? Yes. You know what gives me anxiety for you is how many alerts you're going to have when you sign back into Facebook. And you know what? That makes my heart race from excitement. I'm excited. Oh, wow. I can't wait. To see the little red next to the, you know, like messages. It gives me so much. I have to have those all cleared out. Yes. I have to look at every single alert. Me too. Individually. I can't wait. I hope it says 7,000. Oh, God. Next to the alerts. I want it back so bad. It makes me nervous. Yeah. I want it. It makes me anxious. I miss it. Yep. I need it. Itchy. I need it. Two days ago. Apple stock was $420 a share. Today, it's $446 a share. Man. In 2008, during the crash, during the big crash in the economy, Apple stock was $78 a share in 2008. Wow. Missed the boat on that, I guess. Hindsight, right? It's a very popular company. Yeah. And they're making good products.

7:35I promise you if I bought it at $4.40, it would go down to $2.20. Yeah. Inside of two weeks. Guaranteed. Yeah, you don't want him touching that. You don't want me touching that. Our money guy, he says that you got to buy high and sell higher. And he's right. Because if you would have bought it three days ago, you'd be buying it high. But you could be selling it higher. It's true. M1 San Diego from San Diego. How you doing? Nope. There you are. Sorry. No worries. Good morning, Mikey. Good morning. Ainge, how are we? Hi, I'm good. It's like Angel. Ainge is short for Angel. Hey, I love the intro, man. Beastie Boys is one of my faves. Right on, dude. Um, Janet, you're kind of creepy with the dressing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's his idea. Yeah. It's a challenge. It's a challenge. Tone it back, buddy. Just a little bit, right? Yeah. I could just wear a thong if that'd make you happy.

8:36What if we did a thong race? Yeah, a thong race. I want to be their front row center for LOB. I've got to see this. Who doesn't? Yeah, if we wanted to, we could sell tickets to that thing and sell it out. Yeah, there's not tickets. It's a free deal. Everybody can come down to this live broadcast we're going to do at the House of Blues, and LOB will be up there shaking it and doing it. Fishnets. Fishnets. I also think we have a contract to keep her. Yes. I'm secretly in love with her. The M1s fall for this girl. Oh, yeah. She's easy to fall for. This L-O-B. Yes, she is. They don't know me. They look into those eyes and that's over. Those baby blues. Those baby blues and it's just over. Yeah, we talked about costume yesterday. Me and the choreographer. Fishnets. You need something that really shows off your gift. I will. One of the creepiest things ever is Jay. Referring to L.O.B.'s butt as the gift. It's the gift, and it just keeps on giving. Definitely keeps on giving. He must have said that yesterday 15 times when it came to me. It's a conservative number. That is conservative. 30. The gift. It's the gift. It's the gift. You got to show off the gift, Carol. Carol, where's the gift? I don't know if I can grab that pen. I want to see the gift. There's the gift again. There's the gift. Oh, yeah. Look at the gift. The gift. The gift.

10:02The gift is creepy. Yes. The gift. The gift. It's our boy. Dat ass is less creepy. Yes. Dat ass is less creepy than the gift. Like, shake dat ass. AJ, if I don't say this on the air, I'll forget to say it off the air, but there's a crackle in the phone lines. A crackle? Yes. It was there yesterday. It was there yesterday, but I always forget. As soon as the mics go off, I forget about it. M1. Frijolo from San Bernardino. What's going on? It's M1 Frijolero. Frijolero? Yeah. What's going on? I just want to say a couple things to Woods. Yeah. Easy radio personality. M1 Frijajole. What does that mean? Frijolero means... No, not your name. What did it mean when you said to Woods, easy radio personality? What did that mean? Oh, it's just... He's going to have 7,000 little red marks on his Facebook. No, I said I was hoping for that. Don't be jealous, dude. Try Q-Tip. Hey, don't be jealous, bro. I'm out of the mood. Try Q-Tip. Hey, Woods. No one likes a quitter. Hey, don't be jealous of Woods, dude. Why does everybody like to poke the tiger? Man, they love to poke the tiger. I'm in a throat slidding. He's jealous of you, bro.

11:29Hey, I love you guys. I'm at work, though. You're so jealous of Woods, dude. You wish that when you went on to Facebook, you had little red marks up there, dude, and you don't. Hey, I always have little red marks. I know. It's called herpes. Wow. Easy, little one. Yeah, dude. You're so jealous of Woods, bro. He is. I'm not jealous of woods. Then how come you have a t-shirt on that says I'm jealous of woods? That's what I do right now. That's right. You should sell those. I was just saying that I was hoping for a lot of red marks. I was not expecting that. M1 Mole. M1 Mole from El Cajon. What's going on? Oh, it's M1 Wally. Wally? Yeah. Hi, Wally. Hi. First time caller, I'm so excited. You guys picked up my phone call. Yay. Well, I'm excited, too. Uh-huh. I'm excited, too. I wanted to ask L.O.B. Yeah. Because my wife, she's 30, she's blonde, she's very similar to you, and she goes to, like, dance classes. Yeah. And I know she would love to, you know, go to that event, to the House of Blues. Uh-huh.

12:44And auditions are at 12, right? At 12 on Saturday. Does she have to be there for like two hours? I don't think so. I think they're going to roll people in, do their deal, and roll them out. But I'm really not sure about that. Does she need to have her own choreography? No, and I think that the choreographer is going to send out an email to all the girls that do sign up and let them know what to wear, what to expect. I think what's going to happen is she's going to teach them a little ditty and hope that they can do it back to her. Okay. And then I'll ask her to sign up then. Yeah. Do it. Yeah. She would love it. I know she would love it. She likes doing, like, live stuff. Awesome. Yeah, include a picture. Yeah, we need her. Oh, yeah, she will. Thanks, dude. Okay, thanks. All right, we appreciate it. Yeah, the big pussycat doll thing is going to be a big thing. So dirty. I'm getting under the board. I'm getting under the board. I'm getting under the board. It's my new happy place. He makes me so uncomfortable. I know. I don't want to look over my shoulder. I don't know how you do it where you sit there and you have to look at him after he says creepy stuff. I know. I hide. This is Dog the Bounty Hunter. Oh, yeah. Dog the Bounty Hunter's daughter, Lisa, apparently is a mess. Yes. Didn't know that, but she got arrested. All the cops when I was bailing you out, Lisa, you said you were a ton of motherf***ers.

14:20F*** you, you calling them all kinds of names. You were lucky that you were not tased by those officers. For what? They said they picked me up on Kauai High Street. Yeah, we were busting open people's windows. For what? Screaming and hollering and telling cops that your kids are inside. You're breaking out other people's windows because you're too drunk fighting with the police. You were the most disrespectful person that they had arrested in quite some time. Luckily they didn't charge you with resisting arrest and assaulting a police officer. Well, how did I get to Kavai High Street? That's f***ing probably. You just think this game, Lisa? No, I don't know what happened. What about no drinking, Lisa? I don't remember. The last thing I remember is sitting at the table at Hooters. What are you doing? What is a chick doing at Hooters besides working? Having some wings. I'm going with her buddies. I had to go to the Hooters with you guys. A couple times. A couple times. It's true. Yeah, unless your coworkers force you to go or you're working there. I've seen girls there. Yeah.

15:27Not like I'm doing that. Not a pack of girls, but I've seen girls with dudes. You pretty much go with dudes. Yeah. I've seen little kids there, which always creeps me out, too. It creeps me out. Like a 10-year-old kid with his dad, you're like, Finnegan always wanted to go there. Really? My oldest boy always wanted to go to Hooters. Let's go to Hooters, Dad. Yeah, because to a kid, to a young dude. It's got to be like a Shirley Temple, you know? Oh, yeah. It's a special, like, treat. It's a special thing. You know, you can't go to a strip club, but you can go to Hooters. Yeah. Which is, like, kind of like a virgin daiquiri. Yeah. That's exactly right. Yeah. It's exactly right. Girls spawn on you real good. That's right. It was definitely a special occasion when my parents let me get a Shirley Temple. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Big time. Well, here's the thing. I think you might know your WT when you're, you know, with your parents. The kid are just cussing to each other. Oh, for sure. You got arrested. The last thing you can remember is sitting at a table at Hooters. Yeah. You might be a red knight. You might be. That's right, baby. Listen to this one. Come here, Lisa. Lisa, I turn on the TV. Oh, the music's changing. Must mean they're getting serious and sentimental. Dog shot Sarah. I look at those pictures and it says dog's daughter. And what if it said dies?

16:57Again, I can't do this. Cannot do it. Cannot. Is that dog? Yeah, sometimes I plant something in your head and then when you hear it, it'll make you laugh. Like one time I did that with Amy Winehouse. I said, I want you to imagine that this is Gary Coleman singing. I played rehab. I want you to imagine when you hear this audio that instead of dog... It's a 64-year-old woman named Helen that smokes brown more cigarettes. Here we go. I'll be suspended for a little bit, Lisa. I don't know what happened. She's in trouble. I remember a little bit of peace. I don't know what happened. Lisa.

17:54I turn on the TV, your mug shot's there. I look at those pictures and it says, dog's daughter. And what if it said dies? Polyester pantsuit. Yeah, polyester pantsuit. Cannot do it. Cannot. Somewhere in Florida? Somewhere in Florida. West Palm Beach. Sitting in furniture that's got plastic on. Big long ash on her. Yeah, or wicker furniture. Wicker. Wicker with plastic covered. Plastic covered. Plastic walkways. Oh, boy. You are a smelly pirate hooker. Did you guys hear that Obama and the governor of Arizona got into it? Saw that. Obama is a grudge holder. Yeah, it's a deal. It's his bit. He was upset because he felt that she portrayed him wrong in her book, Scorpions for Breakfast. So he gets off Air Force One. And she's waiting on the tarmac. He shakes her hand and then he goes, you know, attacks. He's upset about it. Now, George W. said in his book that Obama was mad at him because they had met in a hallway one time and he felt like Bush had sort of dissed him. Yeah, sure, sure, sure. Yeah. And George W. wrote in his book, he was like, I didn't diss him. Didn't you?

19:18He said, it's so strange. So I think Obama, if Obama feels that he's been dissed, he wants to let you know it. I saw a picture of her with her finger in his face. I was like, oh, wow, oh, wow. Brazen. They went after it. You get killed for that. Yeah. I guess Secret Service let them go after it. But, you know, apparently she was none too pleased with him. This was her yesterday on Greta Van Susteren. Nice to see you. And we've all seen the picture. In fact, I have it on Greta wire. You're pointing your finger right in his chest. What were you saying to him? Well, I was trying to be there in a tone to welcome him to Arizona. And I was very pleased that he was coming to Arizona to see part of Arizona's comeback. And I had written a handwritten note to him to deliver, welcoming him to Arizona and to thank him for being here and gave him the letter. And he immediately took umbrage, if you will, with my book that I wrote, Scorpions for Breakfast, and was somewhat of disgruntled, if you will, about the way he was portrayed. It is kind of strange.

20:36Yeah, first thing you say. And the first thing you go after, like, just take it easy. This is more of Jan. So he actually read it. Did he actually say anything to you like you got it wrong? You said this about me and this is not true? Well, he actually said, I asked him, I said, oh, you read my book. And he said, I read excerpts from it. And, you know, the bottom line is that. The book is factual. The book is true. I want our borders secured. I want our nation protected. He wants amnesty, and we're never going to agree on that, and we agreed to disagree on that subject. So I don't know why he was surprised by my book, but he evidently is, and he's very thin-skinned in regards to it. Oh, man. Sounds like her skin's pretty thick. She sounds like a young dame. Yeah. She may have seen the Roaring Twenties. Yes. I mean, anyway. I bet someone gave it on the plane on Air Force One. Hey, you're going to meet this clown. Check this out. Just highlighted. There's a one-sheeter on her. Oh, really? What do you think of that, Mr. President? I don't like it. What are you going to do? As soon as we get off the plane, I'm going to tell her what I think about her. You should. Yeah. They're egging him on. Yeah. You tell that, B. What's up? Tell her, dude. Don't stamp that. Don't be a wuss, man. Don't be a wuss. Go after her.

22:00I'll come at you and love talking and running off. I think last night was Marge. That's another name you don't hear that often anymore, Marge. Marge. It's her last episode, the redhead on CSI. It's her last episode last night. Really? Isn't it Marg? Isn't it Marg? Is it Marg? Is it Marg? Helgenberger? Maybe it's Marg. I don't know. It's M-A-R-G. I thought it was Marg. I don't know. Maybe it's Marg. Anyway, so her last episode. And we got a lot of stuff to tell you about. We got Super Bowl, some Super Bowl stats for you. I'm going to tell you what the hot topic is on the cover of the UT today so that when you go to work, you're armed and dangerous. I always have to look my sexy. That's why I'm wearing these tight size 42 pens. Be a part of the show. 570-1949.

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30:08So don't wait. Call today to keep your house warm and safe this winter. Well, the drive looks pretty good so far. A little slowing on the 15 southbound, the 8 west connector. That's about meh. 39 miles an hour. Not too bad. A little slow as you come through the 905, the 905 westbound side from Corporate Center Drive to La Media Road, 33 miles an hour. This report brought to you by ExxonMobil. At Exxon & Mobile, their smart gasoline works at the molecular level to help remove deposits so your car will run cleaner. Just one more way they make gasoline work harder for you. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. A Lincoln Financial Media Station. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. Uh, I can't do anything. I can't do anything handy at all. Lauren. I wash my hands like a thousand times when I cook. Woods. I don't like to be tickled because I squeal like a little girl. And Jay. Hey, I like to skateboard. On FM 94.9. 570-1949. Open phones, M1s. Give us a call. M1 Nation. It's Mikey Show listeners. They are a force. In fact...

31:47You can like our fan page, facebook.com slash Mikey show and become part of the 16,351 listeners that support the Mikey show. I'm the host of the show. My name's Mikey, 41 years old. I got three kids and I've been married for seven years. Woodsy is our sports guy and he is 36 years of age. And he has been married to his lovely wife, Jamie, for how many years? Four. Four years. Fat boy. Oh, my. Wow. Even that one got Nicole. Nicole was shocked. I saw a look on our phone screener's face of shock. It was like, wow, that was really drastic. Just the motivation I need. Drastic measures. Just the motivation. Yeah, because Wood's losing weight and, you know, that'll definitely get you. I see his face.

32:50Yeah. When I'm in the gym. I do, and I'm not kidding. Oh, I know. I'm not elliptical. I see it. Whatever works. There is no doubt in my mind that's true. And I'm going, I'm like, I'm done. Ten minutes, I'm done. I've thought. F that. I've thought about it. Oh, yeah. When there have been times, it's not all the time, clearly, but sometimes I'll think about him when I'm going to eat something, and I'll hear his voice. In your head. It's working. The other day, I did a bicep workout, and my arms were dragging. Yeah. Then I went to the elliptical. Yeah. Did 10 minutes on the elliptical. I was sweating. I was like, it's a pretty nice workout. Yeah. I go, uh-uh. I went back and did another bicep workout, and that is a true statement. Yeah. Well, that's good, man. Yeah. What a day he was. Yeah, I know. I'll hear it, and in my head, I'll cry. Yeah. And I'll be like, leave me alone. Have you seen his family? They're all... Combined weight of his, how many people in your family? Jay, six? Yes. Combined weight, 300 pounds. Yeah. Combined. Six people. Combined weight. Yeah. And he'll go, oh, you're getting that, huh? Yeah. Well, you eat right. And I'll be, in my head, I'll be like, some of your business. Hey, you talk to yourself. Yeah, you talk. I'm going to have this piece of cake. Oh. Get some, Mac. Have another piece of cake. Hey, have conversations with yourself. Shut up, Jay. He doesn't hear Jay's voice.

34:14That's right, LLB. They're teaming up. Lauren O'Brien. Whatever works, guys. Lauren O'Brien. Me and Woods have been very patient with this girl. Have you? Extremely. She's been getting us, dude. Every day. This week I've been on one. I can't tell. I really, this is a true story. I can't tell if she's serious. Oh, I'm never serious. She's never serious, but. But it makes me, it hurts me. Yeah, but you know what? There's a little bit. Yes, behind every joke. Gosh, that's not true. There's a little bit. Behind every joke, there's a little bit. She doesn't know how much we really love her. And we really genuinely love. Yes, she does. Appreciate her. Yes, she does. Yes, she does. That makes me crazy. Lauren O'Brien is the blonde girl over here to my right. It's all boys club. Oh, my God. It makes me nuts. She's going to give me a stroke. It makes me nuts.

35:19We invite her places, and you know her excuse for not coming is, well, you guys will just ignore me and just talk to just each other. 100%. That's not the only excuse that I have, but that is true. So true. I've watched it. Jay is 48 years old, and he is in good shape. He's a surfer. Truth teller. Yeah. Married for 24 years. Yeah. Hell of a dad. Super dad. Dad of the year. Wow. Dad of the decade. He's just mister. Mr. Perfect. Are you going to have a party for your 25th wedding anniversary? I don't know. Is that something you can throw for yourself or do you expect your kids to throw it? Why are you looking at me? I don't know. You're making me nervous. Everybody's looking at me. I don't know. She asked you. No, I don't think it's something you can throw for yourself. I don't think you do it yourself. What are you getting at, Lauren? I'm just wondering. I wonder how the other half lives. The married half. Oh, I see what you're getting at. I'm just wondering, like, when you celebrate anniversaries, because I've been to people's anniversary parties, but I think it's only at, like, 50th. If you want me to have a talk with Matt, I will. No, I don't. Are you sure? But 25 is a big year. Yeah, it is a big year. Matt's Lauren's boyfriend, and Jay would gladly have a man-to-man with him. I'll try space with him. In fact, Lauren has to tell him no, and she has to mean it, because if she didn't, if she said to Jay, yeah, you could talk to my boyfriend.

36:47he'd have a man-to-man with him. Yeah. And he would... I don't think it would do anything. It would embarrass you. I mean, it would embarrass you because... It would embarrass me, but it would have no effect on me. Because he, you know, he shouldn't be doing... Behind every joke, there's a, you know... Yeah. I guess Jay's technically old enough to be my dad, though, so... Yeah. It's true. It is true. No? Yes? Yeah. I think so. I actually think so. Wow. Yeah. Wrong. And Nicole is our 19-year-old phone screener who is definitely young enough to be Jay's daughter. In fact, as Lauren pointed out earlier, Jay has four kids. Three of them are older than our phone screener, Nicole. Yes, true. The only one that isn't is his eight-year-old son, Jasper. So there's that. You're only as old as you are in your mind. Okay.

37:52Then there you go. Word of the day is bubbles. When I say bubbles between now and nine, I could work that into a sentence sometime between now and nine. When I do, you got to be listening. You got to be listening very intently. I'll weave it in. And when I do, call her nine. You'll go to Pample Moose tonight. At six o'clock. Six o'clock standing reservation tonight. All you got to do is listen for me to weave that into a sentence and be caller nine and you will go. You're responsible, though, for drinks and gratuity. So tip your servers, please. Woodsy, is it Pro Bowl weekend? Yeah, man. Already this weekend? If you want a taste of some NFL football, you can get it this weekend on NBC at four o'clock. It is the Pro Bowl. It's the AFC against the NFC. I'll watch it, but be resentful of it. Yes, I will watch it, too, because I like football. Yeah. But final score, 45 to 38. So you're resentful of it because you think that it's always lopsided. It's boring. It's like the NHL All-Star game. It's 15 to 13. You know, there's no defense. Well, I used to enjoy the Pro Bowl. I don't enjoy it anymore. You don't like it because it's a week before the Super Bowl. I don't like it because it's a week before the Super Bowl, and I also don't like it.

39:17See, back in the day, Tom Brady would play. He'd actually play. Even if it was only for one series, he'd still play. Now, what they do is they go, Tom Brady won't be playing. So in place of Tom Brady, it'll be Phillip Rivers. And Phillip Rivers won't be playing. So instead of Phillip Rivers, it'll be... It's Andy Dalton. Yeah. Exactly. That's how it goes now. I know. It's a lot of subs and... Two subs. Oh, dude. Three subs deep. Exactly. But if you're a Charger fan, there will be five Chargers represented at the game. Phillip Rivers will be their quarterback, tight end Antonio Gates, safety Eric Weddle, wide receiver Vincent Jackson, and Ryan Matthews, the running back, in his first ever Pro Bowl. One thing I thought that was pretty interesting that we could talk about is that they will now allow players in the Pro Bowl to tweet before and during Sunday's Pro Bowl, which I found fascinating. Well, what's your deal? Do they need it? Does the NFL need more publicity, I guess is the right word? Do they need more marketing? I guess everyone can use it. You need your cell phones on the field or on the sidelines. They're going to pan to the sideline. All you've got to ask yourself is, okay, so I'm holding my phone. I'm seeing what they just tweeted. You're not. Do you want to?

40:45You want to see what I'm looking at? You want to see what I'm reading? I just saw Ryan Matthews tweet something and press send. Oh, I just got it. Do you want to know what it is? Not really. Okay. Then I won't tell you. Don't tell me. Yeah. Yeah. No. Okay. Because, I mean, I would be interested. Would you? Sure. Their tweets are never any good. I always want to know stuff. That's a true statement. I'd rather know stuff than not know stuff. I think it's their way to drive people to watch the game because they'll be hashtagging Pro Bowl. Yeah, they actually are hashtagging Pro Bowl. Yeah. So that will be the deal. I mean, I say that I probably will be looking, too, just because I'm a voyeur. The ratings are that bad. They need to. I'm a voyeur. But another interesting story, which I did not know about the Pro Bowl, is that. Well, in 2010, they moved it to Miami, and they want to keep it in Hawaii. Well, they, the players, want to keep it in Hawaii. They really want to stay in Hawaii. They get their own hotel at this resort for all the players, and they get to hang out with their families and drink and sit by the pool and have a great time. Jared Allen said, I don't want to go to freaking Indianapolis for the Pro Bowl. We go there through the season. It's supposed to be a little treat. Hawaii's a treat. Right. So that's this Sunday.

42:02January 29th, 4 p.m. on NBC. Cool. Enjoy. Lauren O'Brien, L.O.B., is going to be dancing like a pussycat doll, living out a dream of hers. That's one of her dreams, and she wants to achieve it. She's in that window of time where she can do this. Yeah. And there's a lot of women that feel like her. So much so that they have shown up on our phone lines and calling us and letting us know, yes. I want to do this with you because she's going to have backup dancers. Now, check this out. We're going to do this at the House of Blues in a live broadcast. Yeah. We're going to invite M1s to come out there and check it out. Now, if you're a girl and you're listening right now and you want to be a part of one of the dancers that's dancing up there on stage with LOB, go to MikeyShow.com right now. And if you go there, you're going to see...

42:58A little thing that you click on and fill out the information and send us a picture and tell us about yourself. And that's how you qualify. And auditions are Saturday, this Saturday. Auditions are Saturday at House of Blues. And the only way that you get in there is by getting your name and your email in through MikeyShow.com. That's the portal in which you will go. M1, Ellie from Oceanside. Hi. What's going on? It has nothing to do with what you're talking about. I just wanted some advice. Go ahead. Okay, so I'm a senior, and I'm applying to colleges, and I have financial issues, so I need, like, a big scholarship, and I got into state, and they might, I applied to the honors program and president scholarship award, so if I go there. I get my scholarship paid for. Okay. So I get the whole four years paid for. All right. And I get to go in the honors program, which, like, it means that, you know, you study abroad. Okay. I got all that part. You got to get me to the meat of the story, though. Okay. So then Berkeley also said they might want me. I'm on the, like, waiting list for them.

44:15But that's $18,000 and it's really expensive. So I'm trying to figure out, do I want to go to Berkeley, which has a name, or a state, which is like basically I have no financial problems at all. So I wanted the advice of the group. Okay. Now, you're a real smarty pants, right? You've got a big brain and that's why you even have the opportunity to do this, right? Yeah. All right. Now, what's the state school? Which state? San Diego State. San Diego State. And if you go to San Diego State, you're going to get a free ride. Basically, yeah. Okay. And if you go to Berkeley, you're going to have to have debt. Yeah. Okay. Here is my question to you. First of all, what are you studying? Biology. Okay. So you are, I want you to imagine, I want you to fast forward the tape. This is what I always tell people. Fast forward the tape. What I mean by that is, you're watching your life on a television screen. And you're hitting fast forward like on a TiVo. And you're going bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop. And you're seeing your life playing out on a TiVo. And there it is. It's just you're watching what's happening. And in one of these, you're watching if you go to Berkeley and the other one if you go to San Diego State. Now, I want you to imagine that you are a major biologist that is hiring.

45:46young biologists, and you have two applicants in front of you, one of which just graduated from San Diego State with honors, and the other which just graduated from UC Berkeley with honors. Which one do you want to talk to? It's so hard. Probably the Berkeley one. Well, see, for me, it isn't that hard. All due respect to San Diego State University, I think that Berkeley is more... It's a more esteemed university. Prestigious. Can't you do two years at state and take care of all your general and then transfer to Berkeley? That's an even better idea. Well, what I was thinking was I want to be a doctor, so everyone's telling me to go to graduate school in Berkeley. So that was an idea. You can do that, too. I say Berkeley all the way. Berkeley all the way. I say Berkeley from the start. 72K in debt. It's harder to... She might go to San Diego State and get really grounded there. And then not want to. Friends and stuff like that. And then not transfer. And then I personally have a little bit of the woulda, coulda, shoulda stuff with schools that I didn't go to and stuff like that. So if you get accepted, I would say go. I don't know. The debt is just incredible. When you get out of school and you all of a sudden have all this debt and there's nowhere to go. But there's a lot of scholarship opportunities out there.

47:11And I used to work for a student loan company. And the rate at which you're going to pay back your interest on a student loan is a lot lower than like a personal loan or an auto loan or something like that. Yeah. Well, good luck to you. It could be Dr. Ellie one day. Thank you. Thanks for the call. Happy birthday, Eddie Van Halen. Yeah. 57 years old today. Wow. Shocking. Ellen DeGeneres, or as my dad always like Jay does, always messes the name up. He says Ellen DeGenerate because he thinks that that word DeGeneres sounds like DeGenerate. So he really believes that's her name. She's 54 years old today. Wow. She doesn't look it. No, not at all. Scott Glenn. Silence of the Lambs. Wes. He's Wes from Urban Cowboy. Yes. How old do you think that cat is? 60. How about you, L.O.B.? Do you know who we're talking about? I don't know who he is, no. He was in The Right Stuff. He was in a lot of movies. Great actor. Great actor. He's 71 years old. Holy cow. Couldn't believe it. In Silence of the Lambs, he plays Starling's boss. He's the... Jack. Yeah, Jack something. Something. Hmm. Bob Uecker? Yes, love him. 77 years old. Wow. Wayne Gretzky's 51. Great one.

48:40Yep. And the other half of Wham. Andrew. Andrew. Andrew. Ridgely. Ridgely. Wow. It's amazing that you know that. Yeah, I was a huge Wham fan. 49 years old today. So there you go. This day 14 years ago in 1998, our president, that was the day. It was this day exactly 14 years ago that he said, I did not. Have sexual relations with that woman. Wiener time. 14 years ago. 14 years ago. I was in college. Man, my goodness. I wonder if she's married now, Monica Lewinsky. Probably. Then you're always married to the girl with the dress. Yep. Yeah. Oh, gosh. Yeah, it's her. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She changed her mind. It's Monica. It's Monica Jones now. She looks up like, yeah, yeah. Her name's Monica Jones. Yeah. It's always been. Yes, yes. She's a great intern. Gosh, you would want her to be. Oh.

49:45Jay, that's a great intern. I like them big, Mike. I do not. Is that true? I love them big. Yeah, Mike. I love them big. Man, if you were an intern, you'd be perfect. You in a wig? Of course, I'd be a fat intern. I like Husky. I don't. Mike, will you dress up as Michael Lewinsky for me? Michael Lewinsky. Put on a little blue dress, Mike. He wouldn't get him. The only time I'd ever like you. I got my cigars in here. Hey, Mike, you know how earlier you were talking about the Pro Bowl? You said sometimes this Pro Bowl is going to be three subs deep. That sounds like you, Mike. Wow. Lunchtime. Three subs deep. It's that time, Mike. That is gold. Three subs deep. I'm writing that down. Aren't you? Three subs deep.

50:45Madonna says that she's working through injuries because she's going to be performing at the Super Bowl. She's the halftime entertainment. And she said, I've pulled a hamstring. Oh, boy. And I have a little red dot on my nose where I wounded myself with my microphone. Really? Yeah, this is true. You ever hear of cover-up? She said, I'm going to dance and sing my butt off for the Super Bowl. I'm working so hard on it. She's not a beating in any way. No, no, not one bit. Front page of the UT today. What do you need to know when you go into work today? What's the hot topic? Navy SEALs, actually. True story. Navy SEALs are the red hot it thing right now because of what they did yesterday in Somalia with rescuing those people that have been held hostage. There's a Hollywood style movie coming out in a couple of weeks.

51:49starring some Navy SEALs. So the it thing right now is Navy SEALs. Know it when you're going to work. Speaking of the Super Bowl, ESPN just asked the question, do you wish that the Super Bowl was on a Saturday? 57% of people said yes. They do wish it was on a Saturday. Wood said he does. Absolutely. Yeah, I changed my mind. I do too. Yeah, because you would like to be able to party with your friends like a rock star, and then wake up the next day and not have to worry about going into work. Yeah, that'd be nice. I've always maintained that eventually I think that that day will be a holiday. The Monday. Yeah. That'd be great. Americans eat 1.25 billion chicken wings during the Super Bowl. Mikey. Americans eat 1.25...

52:54Billion chicken wings. You just call that a Saturday night. Now, that's based on approximately 111 million people. Or Mikey. Who watched the game last year. And that would be over 11 wings per person. Over 11,000 wings per minute for you. Now, that many chicken wings weighs over 100 million pounds. About the same as you. Now, this, of course, based on food sales. Well, based on your weight when you were, like, three. That the Super Bowl is actually the second biggest eating day of the year. Which, you know, is your every day. It's like Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is actually the biggest eating day of the year. You'd know that. It's a tattoo on your arm, isn't it? Which, of course, beats out Christmas the 4th of July and New Year's Eve.

53:54Happy birthday. You know, so there's that. Fat. He said that. Oh. I said that. There's a mayor in a Connecticut town that has offended the Hispanic population. He made an offensive taco comment, and I'll tell you all about it. So don't go anywhere. 570-1949. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Here is a great piece of information for you. AIS customers, on average, they report a savings of over $600 a year on auto insurance when they switch to AIS. Listen, I would hope that you take my word for it, but you don't have to. You can call yourself.

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1:01:32Good news for Express Scripts plan members. The Vons Pharmacy accepts Express Scripts and makes transferring prescriptions easy because they do all the work. Vons, ingredients for life. This report, it's brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners with the new year upon us. Now's a great time to bring your car to your neighborhood Toyota dealer. From batteries to tires, Toyota's got you covered. Well, the freeway's a little slow here on the 67 southbound. Post Hill Road to Lakeside Avenue in the 40s. Also heading towards El Cajon. Some delay as you travel into El Cajon on the 54 northbound. The 8 connector. Speeds are a little better now. They were at 19 miles an hour. Looking at 28 miles an hour. Some backup. on the 8 eastbound at the 15 north, 38 miles an hour. This report brought to you by the Exergen Temporal Thermometer. It's a top choice of doctors, nurses, and healthcare professionals. Now it could be yours, the Exergen Temporal Thermometer. Get it at Supercenter, Sam's Club, and other fine retailers today. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back. Tickets, please. With Mikey. I'm a pretty honest guy, and I've been a pretty honest guy for many years. Woods. I'll never forget it, as long as I live. It was some village in Africa. She had...

1:02:57Like 60 of those rings are on her neck and just boobs hanging out. Lauren. You know what I think the scariest thing is about clowns? They don't say anything. Yeah, that's right. Even though they can talk. And Jay. Just a man trying to do the right thing. On FM 94.9. What, did you watch American Idol last night? I didn't. You didn't? I didn't. I'm watching it today, though. I got it taped. It sucks you in. It sucks you in. Yeah, it does. It isn't fair. I know. Of our wives. No, it's not. He got us watching it. Yeah, Jamie had to work a little bit last night, so we both agreed we'd watch it today. So there's that. So there's that. So I'll be watching American Idol today and probably be very in on it. We having a Chardonnay? Having no Chardonnay? Yeah. No. Little grapes. Yeah, some grape cheese. Yeah, cheese, grapes. Maybe some chocolate. Buy an L.L. Bean sweater around our necks.

1:04:24A breaking news that there was a car found on fire the fourth floor of a parking garage. And this happened, by the way, at the Hilton Bayfront Hotel down on Park Boulevard. So they're over there trying to contain it. Breaking story. And a pretty big deal. Check this out. Today is going to be gorgeous. I mean, today's Chamber of Commerce weather. What does that mean? It means the Chamber of Commerce could take a picture of today and use it for advertising for San Diego because it's going to be so freaking beautiful in town today. Also, the surf is going to be really good. It's going to be warm weather and the surf is going to be real good. The UT did something rad. They printed the different areas and how big the waves are going to be there. In OB, 14 to 21 feet.

1:05:24That's what it says, man. Holy cow. Sunset Cliffs, 14 to 20 feet. Wow. Wow. That's big. PB, 11 to 15 feet. Coronado, 9 to 13 feet. Wind and Sea, 11 to 16 feet. These are the waves, man. Yeah. Monsters. Horseshoe and La Jolla, 14 to 19 feet. I bet that's a wicked wave. Blacks Beach, 9 to 14 feet. That wave tosses, too. IB Pier, 12 to 17 feet. These waves, I mean, if you're a surfer, today's the day. I gotta go look at those. That's huge. Ponto, 7 to 10 feet. That's perfect. Little pipeline. Moonlight Beach, 9 to 13 feet waves. You just get spit right out of them.

1:06:25Swami's, 8 to 11 feet waves. Scripps, 5 to 7. La Jolla Shores, 5 to 7. Dude, you got the best barrels ever, dude. Where do you like surfing, Jay? I like pipes and barneys and turtles and all that area. I don't see pipes on here. No, it's right down from Swami's. It's pretty much the same? Yeah, Swami's holds a big swell. 8 to 11 feet. Tabletops is good. It's a little bit of a paddle. Now, here's the deal. Temperatures today. See, now, I like this, man. I look forward to this. 78 degrees in San Diego today. Oceanside, 76. Miramar, 79. Chula Vista, 82 degrees. Wow. It's summer. Fallbrook, 84. Escondido, 83. Rancho Bernardo, 84. El Cajon, 85. Wow. Nice. I have people that want to visit me from Texas, my home state, come out in January. It's nicer than in July. Because they come in June or July. Yeah, it's gray. It's crappy. It's chilly. Isn't that crazy, man? Yeah, my family came last year. I think it was July. They were around July 4th. And we were going to go do one of those cruises. It was too cold that night. It was freezing cold. I know it. Speaking of swamis, by the way, Woods was with his wife, Jamie, and they...

1:07:52He had a nice little workout at the gym. Yep. And decided that you and Jamie were going to take the four dogs going to walk. Four of them. There you go. That's good for them. By swamis. Yeah. And Woods is always the funniest scene in a movie. Yeah. That's how I describe it. I don't always mean to be. Woods is a... I hope this doesn't upset you, but you're a bull in a china shop. I hope that doesn't. Is that okay to say that you're a bull in a china shop? My wife tells me that all the time. Well, here's the deal. You know how some people are accident prone? Yeah. Woods is stuff prone. Stuff happens with woods. If you hang out with woods or you're around woods, stuff will happen. It's never a dull moment. It's never a dull moment. I hadn't had my car broken into ever. I hang out with Woods, my car gets broken into. It's a true statement. Things will happen. He attracts stuff. And so Woods was walking with his wife, minding his own business, stretched out his arms behind him and smacked. And I said smacked. I say he smacked a woman's breasts. Oh, boy. Open hand? Yeah.

1:09:09Wow, Woods. My arms were killing me. And I was like, ah. And I have one hand on the dogs. My right hand was on the leashes. And I'm stretching my left arm behind me. There's nobody around. I didn't hear anything. And then I just go, wah. And I go, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. And she's still jogging. And she's jogging. And she turned around and she goes, it's fine. She looked at me like, you're like a creep. I mean, I got boob. Hey, listen, listen. The only reason that I think she was probably cool is because you were with Jamie. Yeah. Yeah. And she was like, well, it had to be an accident because he wouldn't have done something like that, you know, with his wife standing. Unless they're swingers. Right. Unless they're swingers, in which case. We're not, for the record. Yeah. I think for the record, you are. Plus, it probably really hurt, so. It was embarrassing for everybody. She was probably trying to run away before she started crying. Yeah. I mean, I got her good. Oh, man. Right in the boob. And from what I hear, that doesn't feel good. It does not. By the way, Tony is on the line. Tony, are you there? I am here. Tony's from Vista, and you have a friend on American Idol. That is right, I do. What's the deal? Well, did you see last Thursday when they had the auditions in Pittsburgh? Yeah, yeah, I did. You did, I didn't. I did, Woods didn't. He was one of the first guys that they did a full promo on.

1:10:35He was from Wisconsin. Uh-huh. He sang the Family Matters song. Yeah. I used to sing with him in college. No way. Yeah. He is amazingly talented. Oh, my gosh. Name three judges from American Idol. Oh, there you go. Unfortunately, because I watched that episode, I probably can name ladies' first name. Dude, that's pretty awesome, man. Yeah, he's going to be a force, I'm thinking, this season. I've never watched his show before, so I'm a little new to the whole program. Well, it'll suck you in, man. What's his name again? His name is Reed Grimm. He's from Ellsworth, Wisconsin. But, man, the dude can sing. He's got just such a unique presence on stage. That's killer. Yeah. Reed Grimm. Can you sing the Family Matters song? No, I don't know that song like he does. But, like, family has always been just such a big thing for him, and his sister's the one that got him into the show, and so that's why he kind of chose that song. That's awesome. Hey, thanks for the call, dude. Yeah, thanks for having me on, guys. Yesterday, Lauren went to the post office. This is something that happens with all of us. She went to the post office, sent something, and she wants to get in this line, but the lady's line is closed, and she knows that the lady's line is closed.

1:11:51She put up one of those Lane clothes deals. And all Lauren had to do was, what did you need? A printing label? I already printed the label from the self-service kiosk. Yeah. But it printed out and it was like 8 by 10, this huge label. And it wouldn't fit on the face of the envelope. So I wanted to like put it on the back. Got it. But I wanted to make sure that that was going to be okay. Got it. I didn't need to purchase anything. You just had a question. Just a quick question. Just a question. From someone that works at the post office. So she. Said, hey, can I ask you a real quick question? And the lady with the lane closed sign rolled her eyes and went, sure, give it to me. Yes. We've all had this happen, by the way. Listen, it's just a question. It's just a question. Yeah, I don't need to register. Just a question. Also.

1:12:53I'm not going to ask to be your roommate. Right. Right. Because you're reacting like I. Yeah. The reaction that I'm getting is that I just ask, hey, is it cool if I camp out on your couch? Can I borrow $5,000? Yeah. Yeah. Can I borrow $5,000? I didn't just ask if you can help me move. Right. Because you're reacting like I just asked you if you were busy Saturday. Exactly. And if I bought beer. You come over and help me move my piano. Invite myself into your wedding party and say, come on, can I be one of your bridesmaids? Right. What was she still doing sitting there, though? Well, she was gabbing with the other lady with Elaine closed. Which is probably why she was pissed. They were gabbing, yeah. And I waited for a break in the conversation. I said, excuse me, can I just ask you a quick question? Can I put this label on the back? I wonder why the post office is failing. Yeah, no kidding. I was like, come on. Well, it isn't just the post office, man. I mean, this is a deal. Everywhere. Yeah, like, let's say you're at any place, man, and, like, the lane is closed, but you have a question. Just a question. I used to work plenty in customer service and retail when I worked at a restaurant. I could be finished with my shift just enjoying a nice meal by myself, and if someone asked me a question about the restaurant. Mm-hmm.

1:14:13Didn't just mean I didn't suddenly not know about the restaurant because I wasn't working. Or like you're going to be so put out. There's no customer service anymore. What happened, man? I don't know, man. I don't know. People became jerks. I think it's an age thing, too. I think people hit a certain age and they're just like, really? I'm just fed up with everything. No way, because there's young kids that work at certain places that are like, what are you doing standing in line trying to order at the register? Yeah. Right. Trying to have a conversation with my friends. And here's the thing, too, is that. Like, it isn't, you just ask yourself as you're driving your car if you've experienced that because when I'm standing there in line, if somebody has a question, it don't bother me. No. It doesn't bother me at all if it's a question. If somebody was, like, getting in front of me in line. Yeah, cutting. That's different. Yeah, don't cut. Don't cut. Don't take cuts. You clown. Don't take cuts. There's been a couple places. I like to go out for breakfast. It's like my favorite thing to do on the weekends, go out for breakfast. There's been a couple places recently where I've thought about not frequenting them anymore. Because of what? Because they've got people that are working there that are irritated that I'm in line to order. It's like you're a business. That's what you're there for. But I'm disrupting either the...

1:15:31The wiping of the glass that they were doing or like the conversation they were having with their co-worker. Right. I don't stand for it, LLB. 570. 570-1949. Which, by the way, Woods, I'm surprised because you're usually not a person that like, you don't really like confrontation. I do it in a way and especially on the phone. Passive aggressive? Yeah. No, not passive aggressive. But like my thing is, hey, look, I'm not trying to put you out. I'm very honest with people on the phone. He kills them with niceness, I notice. Like in person, if someone gives you an attitude, he turns on and gets even nicer sometimes. Yeah. Not with me, he doesn't. Not with Jay. M1 Embry from San Diego. Are you there? Yes, I'm here. Good morning, guys. Good morning. Go ahead. So I just had kind of a quick comment on the mail thing. I've worked customer support for quite a while. And you know what I do when I get someone who acts like that? I ask for someone else. I'm like, is there anyone else available? And they get really kind of put off by that, like saying, oh, you don't want help from me? Well, I think that the can I get somebody else insinuates, are you going to get me in trouble? Like, you're that. I think they instantly think, oh, you want to get me in trouble. No, you should be getting them in trouble. You should be treating you like that. Well, what she would have done, I guarantee in that situation, was probably pointed to the one lane that was open, the worker that was still taking the 17 people that were in line. Right.

1:16:52And she probably would have been like, yeah, he can help you. Here's the deal, too. You guys deal with it. And you can call us 570-1949. You guys deal with the customer service thing where you know in your head. And this is what will drive you mad. You know in your head they know the answer or they can do it, but they're too lazy to do it. And so it's easier for them to say to you, no, I don't think that. I don't think it's here anymore. You don't think it is, or are you sure? I'm pretty sure it's not here anymore. That happens when you walk into a store and say, do you guys still sell couscous here? Oh, I don't think so. It probably would be in aisle eight. Yeah, I just looked in aisle eight. Then no. Yeah, then I don't think so. I don't think so. I love it when you find the guy, though. He's like... Let's go. I love that guy, man. He shows you exactly where it is. How great is that guy? That's a good guy. I like the guy that you said, I've got a problem, and he says, I'm going to have a solution for you. That's the guy I like. You just want to kiss that guy. Problem solvers. Problem solver. 570-1949 is our number if you want to lament along with us because you experience the same garbage, and it drives you absolutely batty. The guy that knows but doesn't want.

1:18:12Or the guy that doesn't know and knows that he could know, but he doesn't want to. He doesn't care to know. He doesn't want to. No, he doesn't want to work. And you don't want to say to him, listen, I really need your help. Yeah. I know you don't want to, but I need you right now. Yep. And you're really the only way. And then if you do push it. Knowledge is power, people. M1, Ali's on the line from San Diego. Hi. Are you there, Ali? I think it's Holly. Holly, go ahead. I was in a Starbucks once, and the girl took my order and was writing my name on the cup and dropped the cup on the ground and proceeded to turn around and pick it back up. She started to hand it back to the barista, whoever, whatever you call it, and I said, excuse me, you know, I think you just dropped my cup on the ground. And she's like...

1:19:09No, I did not. Oh, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. Yeah, customers always wrong. Yeah, customers always wrong. You're so brave. I would have been like, I'll have dirt coffee. Yeah, I'll drink dirt coffee. I can't say anything. I can't say anything. Me too. A hundred. I would absolutely drink the dirt coffee. Yeah. Because I would be afraid. I'd be afraid to be like, um, can you get another cup? Yeah, in fact. When I see people that do do that, my heart starts. Yeah, it makes me nervous. But I'm so proud of them. I know, me too. I'm jealous. Proud of them, but jealous. Because you know me. If we went to a restaurant today and I ordered a steak and they brought me salmon, but the waiter was really cool and helpful and nice, I'd be like, well, I'm eating salmon. I'm eating salmon. But if he was a jerk, I'd be like, hey, pal, I ordered a steak. M1 Tim from Temecula. Are you there? Yes, I am. What's up? Hey, you know. I'm at college right now, and it recently happened with me at a student services thing. I had a question. I had accidentally written down the wrong classes, so I couldn't find the numbers or whatever. I went to student services, and this lady was just outright rude, whatever. But to be honest, I found like maybe I'm a little obsessive this way, but if I don't say something outright, I'll walk out of the building, and for the next three hours, I'll be arguing with you in my head. Oh, yeah.

1:20:24Absolutely. Oh, of course. So it's easier. I mean, it's a little bit of an awkward thing at first to be like, yeah, you know, you're being really rude right now. Like, can I get somebody else or whatever? We think it in our heads. Yeah, man. There's an art form to it. Yeah, there's an art form to it. But you do carry it with you. Oh, you haven't seen the paper today. Oh, well, then you don't know what area of San Diego the Great White was spotted at yesterday? With a photograph in the UT? Oh, so you want to... You want to surf today? Well, then you should probably tune in so that I can tell you where the photograph of the Great White was taken yesterday. This is the Mikey Show, FM 94.9. There's a reason BMW is number one. At BMW Encinitas, we're out to crush the competition by continuing to make the ultimate driving machine affordable. This weekend, get special pricing on hundreds of new BMWs. Buy a 2012 BMW 528i sedan.

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1:27:36The Vons Pharmacy is putting out the welcome mat, and it stretches from one end of the Vons parking lot all the way to the other. That's what we do. And if you're an Express Scripts plan member from Walgreens who's looking for a new home, we welcome Express Scripts. Plus, you'll get a $25 reward coupon when you transfer your prescriptions to the Vons Pharmacy. We'll do all the work to make transferring easy. How's that for a warm welcome? The Vons Pharmacy is your one stop for wellness. We have everything from immunizations to prescriptions all right here. Plus, you'll get the experience and friendly professional service we're known for. That's like getting a welcome mat and a giant red carpet. Make the switch to the Vons Pharmacy. We'll make you feel right at home. Vons, ingredients for life. Medicare, Medicaid, and other government programs excluded. Other restrictions and exclusions apply. See pharmacy for details. Offer expires March 31st, 2012. Coupon good towards a future shopping trip of $50 or more. At Exxon and Mobile, their smart gasoline works at the molecular level to help remove deposits so your cars run cleaner.

1:28:41It's one more way they make gasoline work harder for you. This report is brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners with the new year upon us. Now's a great time to bring your car to your neighborhood Toyota dealer. From batteries to tires, Toyota's got you covered. Well, the freeway's a little slow here on the 67 southbound Post Hill Road to Lakeside Avenue in the 40s. Also heading towards El Cajon, some delay as you travel into El Cajon on the 54 northbound, the 8 connector. The speeds are a little better now. They were at 19 miles an hour, looking at 28 miles an hour. Some backup on the 8 eastbound at the 15 north, 38 miles an hour. This report brought to you by the Exergen Temporal Thermometer. It's a top choice of doctors, nurses, and healthcare professionals. Now it could be yours, the Exergen Temporal Thermometer. Get it at Supercenter, Sam's Club, and other fine retailers today. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. A Lincoln Financial Media Station. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't have any, you know, athletic ability. Lauren. I worked at Comic-Con. Woods. I, to my credit, Steve Woods have a hole in one. And Jay. I love that sappy movie. On FM 94.9. Well, B is sitting to my right. My friend Jay is sitting to my left. And our phone screener is Nicole. She's 19 years old and sits in my office screening phone calls and is separated from this studio.

1:30:24By glass. You want to dance like a pussycat doll with L.O.B. Just go to Mikey show dot com. You're going to see where it says dance with L.O.B. The auditions are going to be this weekend. But the only way into that audition is to go and register online right now by going to Mikey show dot com. You're going to fill out a form, send us a picture and get all in. Now, L.O.B. will be dancing on a live broadcast. We're going to broadcast the Mikey show. From the House of Blues. Going to tell you where that shark is in IB. Also going to give you that offensive taco comment that was made by a mayor in Connecticut. Woods, new hire for the Indianapolis Colts. Yeah, it's official. They have hired a new head coach in Indianapolis, and his name is Chuck Pagano. He is the former Ravens defensive coordinator. Brilliant defensive mind.

1:31:35and is very excited. He's 51 years old. This will be his first head coaching position. Also, UFC fans, UFC on Fox 2 is this Saturday, 5 p.m. at the United Center in Chicago. The big match will be Phil, Mr. Wonderful Davis, who trains in Chula Vista. Sweet. Yeah, he went to Penn State, was an amazing wrestler. He's 9-0 in the UFC. He will be taking on Rashad Evans, who is very beastly. And, yeah, that's in Chicago. It's the headliner. It's a whole story on that dude in the UT today because of how UFC is blowing up even bigger. Yeah. I thought you had another one. No, that's it. Good to go. There's a shark. Got big waves out there today, which is great. The problem, Chief Brody, is that shark in the water. Our shark. You go inside the cage. The cage goes in the water. You go in the water. Shark's important. Our shark. Imperial Beach. Posted an advisory because there's a shark believed to be a great white that was spotted close to the shore in I.B. yesterday. See, a surfer that was standing at the end of the beach, at the end of Beach Avenue, south of I.B. Pier, spotted a fin above the water about 9 o'clock in the morning on Tuesday, took a picture of it. Was swimming about 100 to 150 yards offshore.

1:33:31In water that was about 10 to 15 feet deep. That's nothing. See, the photo was sent to shark experts. Determined that the fin belonged to a great white. Approximately 16 to 18 feet long. 16 feet long. See, a shark is a perfect eating machine. I would not. I mean, please. I mean, come on. Now, here's the deal. That great white probably doesn't just hang out there in IB. He probably cruises up and down, doesn't he? It's called cruising the drag. Yeah, he's cruising the drag. A real get. He's just checking stuff out. If you're a surfer, just keep your eyes open. That's all I'm saying. Get your feet up on the board. Forget it. Too late once you see him. Get your feet up on the board. Oh, my God. I can't imagine what I do. Hang in a pack.

1:34:49Don't be the lone surfer. Is it better to be in a pack? Oh, yeah. You don't want to be the last one off the back. So the mayor of East Haven, Connecticut, he's being interviewed about police officers that were apparently harassing Latinos. And here's what happened. And that's why we can't always believe what we hear from the press. Never criticize without knowing the facts. What are you doing for the Latino community today? I might have tacos when I go home. I'm not quite sure yet. I have spent two years in Puerto Rico. I will probably do the same thing for the Latino community. You realize that's not really the comment to say right now. You might have tacos tonight. I might have spaghetti tonight. Being of Italian descent, I could go out and I have had ethnic food. And when you asked me what I was doing for Latinos tonight, I may go out and have a Latino dinner. In the Latino community, there's nothing wrong with that. And you could twist it and turn it whichever way the press decides to do. We don't have to. You did it for us. You did it for us. Oh, my gosh. Holy cow. Digging. And then he just starts digging and digging and digging. I'm going to go to a restaurant. I'm going to give money back to the Latino community by eating in a Latino restaurant. Now, you can make it.

1:36:19You can make it seem like whatever you want. I was just trying to say that I'm going to give money to Latinos tonight. At a restaurant. If you want your Valentine's date to be successful, dudes, plan ahead and spend a lot, okay? Survey just found that more than half of the people, and I'm talking about dudes, make their Valentine's Day dinner reservations more than a week. In advance, 93% of people plan to spend as much as last year or take it up a notch. I will not. Of course not. I would rather get takeout. Made up holiday. Two thirds of people are spending at least 100 bones. Nope. Last year, we went out for Valentine's Day. Yeah. We got rushed out because they were trying to have as many shifts as possible. Yeah. They have a set menu where it's like this inflated price. Yeah. You just end up getting irritated with each other. You get all dressed up and then you get like shoved out of there. They get you a Valentine's Day. We always fight. There's too much pressure on that day. Jay, do you celebrate Halloween? For the kids, yeah. All right. Yeah, it's a kid's holiday. Okay. Do you actually decorate your house and have a haunted house for yourself? Oh, it's so huge. No, for the kids. Oh, it's for the kids. You don't enjoy it. Oh, I love it. It's a beating for you. I love it. Oh, all right. But Valentine's Day, that dude over there, he ain't spending money. I will...

1:37:46Maybe bring some flowers home. Flowers are pick on the 163. And listen, M1s, if you want to know the best area to pick flowers on the 163, Baboa. Baboa. Over by Baboa. Baboa Park. Baboa. They got some wildflowers that grow over there. Yeah, they're weeds. They won't know the difference. I stick them in a cigar box coming to camp. They're those ones where you blow on them and you make a wish. Yeah. They're called wish flowers. They're wish flowers. I think those are dandelions. No, they're wish flowers. My wife loves them. They're weeds. They're just to go to Vons. They've got cheap flowers there. It's a day to celebrate your love with your sweetheart. I love her every day. Do you get the 7-Eleven? One Rose 7-Eleven deal. No, that's a Woods bit. Yeah, when I was a senior in high school. Did you give that? Yeah, when I was a senior in high school, I bought a flower and a little teddy bear from the gas station. Is it the hard teddy bear? Yes, from the gas station. I was a senior in high school. I'm a grown man with a wife that I'm going to have to... It's still pretty awesome. Oh, yeah. It worked. It wasn't that, pal.

1:39:00It was that. It was. It was the rose from the Chevron that got you. And the fact that he didn't have two chins. And then he puts his eyebrows up like, did you hear me? Yep, I said it. Wow. I think I will get you. You know, the best thing about my life, though, is that I don't have a receding hairline. And that's the thing that I can thank God for every day. Yeah. You know, I'll always be fat, but at least I'm not old. Everybody. What a D. Everybody just freaking take it down. Settle down. Ovation. You guys are seeing slingy. Why don't you give me some? Listen. Ovation. Woods has a goal, and one of the goals is to lose some weight. One of his goals is to cut down on the smoking, and all of this stuff makes for a stressful situation. Yeah. 100%. Here at work, especially when you have Jay working with you. Yeah. Talking about my double chins.

1:40:01What do we have as a prize that we can give away? We have a pair of tickets to the Monster Energy AMA Supercross at Qualcomm Stadium on February 11th. What's Qualcomm? What's Qualcomm? Okay, now. Qualcomm. Now. I love you, Jay. Just came into my head. Stressful jobs. If you have a stressful job, 570-1949, we'll pick the most stressful and give you a prize. Oh, I've got a better prize for that. I didn't realize that's what we're doing. We have a one-hour massage at the Therapeutic Massage and Body Works in Encinitas. Then let's give that away. Yeah, help alleviate some of that stress. Yeah. Real good. 570-1949. I need a stressful job. It's got to be, when you call us, if you're calling, it's because it's a very stressful job. We should give them a point of reference. One to ten, how stressful is our job?

1:41:03In your opinion. One. Really? When we're on the air. Oh, when we're on the air. As a whole. It's a stressful job because if you don't perform, you can get canned. Right. Yeah, plus you got to be stressed about getting up in the morning. You got to be stressed about coming to work and having your coworkers call you fat. Yeah. You know, that's one thing. Everything that you say is scrutinized constantly on Facebook or email. Everything that you eat is scrutinized by some coworkers. Everything you say gets, like, taken out of context. I give us a five. I say five. Hey, hey. Everybody just chill out. Everybody just chill out. I want to hear about you. I want you to call me if you've got a stressful job. 570-1949. M1 Travis from Encinitas. Go ahead. Here's the deal, Mike. Yep. I don't speak Spanish. I work strictly with Spanish-speaking individuals, and we work on houses. Oh, that is not easy, dude. I'm surprised that you don't fluently speak Spanish by now, being that that's what you're like. I know keywords, but I can't say them on the air. Yeah. I get it. I know those. You know how it goes. Oh, yeah. Well, I'm Mexican. Of course I do. Yeah.

1:42:27Hang on the line. All right. That's your stressful job. Hang on. We'll see if somebody beats it because we're going to give somebody a massage. We're going to give somebody a massage. M1 Sean from Escondido, you there? How's it going, guys? Good. What do you do? I'm an IT service technician. So not only do we get people calling in and complaining about their computer and yelling at us on the phone and wanting us to fix things, we have our boss who's standing over us making sure that everything is going right. We have tickets that come in the queue. We have emails that come in. It's a constant frustration, constantly stressful. You guys on call too? Yes. The fact that you are, that your job mainly consists of complaints. Well, almost entirely. Yeah. And could be like whether or not the company runs or not, if the system fails. And how many people do you hear complaining about their IT staff? Oh, yeah. We're constantly busting our butts.

1:43:2824-7. It's thankless. That's stressful, man. It doesn't matter if we're doing a thousand things or one thing. They think that we're not doing anything. So it's a thankless job, and then you're going in, and you know people are going to bitch at you that day. Like, you know every day that you go to work, there is 0% chance that nobody bitches at you. Well, and also, you know every day you walk in, you're going to be flooded with stuff that you have to do to keep stuff up and running. And on top of it, if you want to stay in the field, you have to keep yourself on top of the game. All the new software. That might have got me. Yeah, you got to know. The new technology. All right, hang on, Sean. M1, easy day from San Diego. You there? Yeah, I'm here. What do you do? I'm an EMT on an ambulance. Oh, wow. See, now that seems like a really cool, interesting job, but tell me about the stress. Hey, you know. People's lives are in your hands every day. So, you know, if you're having a bad day, you know, people that you're with every day are having an even worse day. Oh, yeah. So a bad day for you could mean somebody's dead. Exactly. In your arms. And they have to see a lot that we couldn't bear. Yeah, exactly. See, I won't give them that one. You know why?

1:44:47Because they obviously have the Constitution. They signed up for that. They obviously have the Constitution to be able to see blood. For somebody like me and you, it would freak us out. They're wired for it. They have to stay calm. We know what we're going into. That's for sure. But the one thing that I'll give you is if you have a bad day, somebody may be dead. Right. And that is stress. Right. And if somebody cuts you off in traffic, somebody may die. Yeah. You've got to get there on time. Exactly, exactly. I get to see the best of the drivers every day. Hey, by the way, since I have you on the line, if you are, you know, when you're speeding down the road, you got your sirens going and everything, do you ever experience yahoos that don't pull over to the side of the road? Oh, it's amazing. Yeah, that's the best part of it. I think it would be best if we had a PSA on the radio about people learning to pull over to the right. Yes. Definitely. Hey, listen, when there's an ambulance or a fire truck, I am like gun deal. I do sometimes if I'm on the other side. I was just going to say that. I do the same thing. You don't know where they're turning. Just pull over. See, I've seen that move. I do it. I never do that. I do it sometimes. It just depends on how wide the lane is. If you have the chance to, you should. You should. Because you don't know where they're going. Yeah, it's a law.

1:46:06Yeah, they'll just slam on their brakes right in front of us or, you know, pole right in front of us. Monsters. Does anybody, like, kind of draft behind you? I've seen monsters do that. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, yeah. They follow them. They're like, oh, yeah, I'm going to speed right behind them. Because that'll give me free access. Clear path of traffic. Oh, my gosh. Hang on the line. That's pretty good. M1, Jill, you there? Yes, I'm here. What do you do? I teach special ed preschool. That's tough. It's pretty stressful when you have kids with autism and Down syndrome and cerebral palsy. Some of them are in wheelchairs. Every day. Every day. That takes a special kind of person. I agree with that. It takes a special kind of person. I don't know. I've never done it. I can imagine it's very stressful. Isn't that what you're trained to do, though? Yeah, but it doesn't make it any easier. Yeah, and your brain is still taking that onslaught. Yeah, and I've played with some autistic kids in this band before, and I watched the teacher, Miss Angela, and how she handles herself. But you can tell it would get to you sometimes. It would stress you out. And if you're doing special ed, it's...

1:47:22you might not have a specialty in all the different needs that somebody has. That's a good point. So dealing with autistic kids is completely different within just that spectrum, but also autistic kids and Downs kids are totally different. Totally. Yeah. That's pretty freaking stressful. You know the thing is, is every single child that has autism is different. Yeah. Exactly. So you can't just go in and say, okay, I have this certificate or this training and be able to treat all of them the same way because every single one of them is like a puzzle. So every day that you go in, you have to say, okay, what works with this one doesn't work with this one. You could get a new student and that throws off the whole chemistry of the classroom. So then you have some kids, you know, chewing on their backpacks and you have other ones taking their shoes off. Now, don't anybody think, hang on a second. Now, don't anybody think that I'm going to play favorites. To Jill, just because my son is autistic, I know you have a stressful job, but I'm not going to play any favorites here. Hang on a line, okay? Thanks. People probably, oh, Mike, he's going to pick her. That is a stressful, my sister has Down syndrome, and just being with her sometimes for one day, if it's a bad day, is, it'll get you on edge. How about this one? M1 Genie, you there? Yes, I am. I work for a dentist, and dentists have the highest.

1:48:46suicide rate in any profession. Is that true? Yes. Dentists have, somebody Google it. I always heard it was toll booth workers. That they have the highest rate? Urban legend, yeah. Dentists do. And the reason why everyone, when they first look in, one of the first things they say, I hate the dentist. Yeah, that's true. I don't want to be at the dentist. Right. You know, that last... thing I ever want to do is go to the dentist. It's a true statement. Yeah. Everybody hates you. I say that. Yep. And you hear it all day from every person that comes in. I don't say it to them. No, I say it behind their backs. All right, hang on the line. Speaking of saying it behind their backs, I just put her on hold. It's not that big a deal to me. I couldn't say it to her, but, you know, now that I can say it behind her back, you know... Doesn't get you. I mean, to me, it seems like... If you work the front desk at any doctor or any office, you could say the same thing. Dennis, to me, doesn't really make... I just wasn't brave enough to say it to her when I had her on. None of us are to say it. We can't say it right in front of them. We're not monsters. Of course not. M1 Harold from San Marcos. You there? I'm here. You're an electrician. It's stressful, man. Working with live electrical all the time. Yeah, but you don't...

1:50:10get bit very often anymore. You're good at it. I'm pretty careful, but there's always that chance. It's pretty stressful at times, especially when your phone rings in your pocket. The vibration will scare the crap out of you. Maybe turn the vibrate off. Put it on mute. Harold, tell people about the time that you were working on the ladder. The two things, the two live wires. Oh, boy. I got a live wire, went through my right arm, into my left arm, and locked me up. I couldn't let go. My jaw locked, everything. The only reason I got off was because I was on the ladder and kicked it out from underneath me. Yeah. Oh, crazy. You've heard the term, your life, your eyes. Yeah. I literally saw my wife, my kids, everything. Was it 110? No, it was 480. Oh, yeah, that'll get you. What's 110? 110. That's what you plug in the wall? Yeah. That's what you plug in the wall? 220 is what you would plug a jacuzzi into? I've been zapped by 220. And he got zapped by 4 what? 480. Did it burn you? Did it burn you? Oh, yeah, yeah, it burned my arm.

1:51:24Oh, my gosh. Yeah, he grabbed on one hand with his right and the other wire with his left, and then it electrocuted him, and it made him hold on. He couldn't let go, and his jaw clenched up. We had an electric chair in here that we used to use. What was that, Jay? That's just volts. Probably four volts. Four, and I couldn't handle that. Oh, my God. I touched a 220 screw one time with the end of my thumb, and it lit me up, and I kind of fell off. Once that happens, too, it's got to be stressful that that's going to happen again. All right, so here's what we got. We got electrician, IT, dentist's office, working with special ed kids. And the guy that works with non-English speaking people. I got my vote. What do you think? I've got mine too. Go ahead. I'm going to go with the IT guy. L-O-B? I think E-M-T. Jay? I like the E-M-T as well. And I like IT. So we're going to let Nicole be the deciding vote. Tiebreaker. Who do you vote for?

1:52:37It has to be any of the ones that you guys picked. It has to be either IT or EMT. I think the EMT. Yeah. EMT it is. Get him a massage. Winner. Is getting a massage. T is. You got a bad day. Yeah, you got a bad day. Somebody might end up dead. What very famous game show host just admitted. That when he filmed the show, sometimes he was drunk. Mikey Show on FM 94.9. San Diego's number one volume Subaru dealer just got even better. Kearney Mesa Subaru has opened a brand new showroom in the heart of San Diego. We're celebrating by inviting you to our grand opening event. In honor of our new showroom, the factory has sent us a special shipment of top-selling Subarus. This means we're making deals so you can stay big.

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2:02:49I'm going to open my beer right as we start. Be like a pussycat doll. Mikeyshow.com. And at Mikeyshow.com, you're going to see a thing there that you click on, you get your info in. You could be dancing with L.O.B. at our live broadcast that we're going to have now in San Diego. House of Blues. Ladies and gentlemen, Pat Sajak. Have you ever done Wheel of Fortune a little bit drunk? Yes.

2:04:15When I first started and was much younger and could tolerate those things, we had a different show then. You didn't win money. You won fake money with which you could buy cheesy prizes. A turntable would go around, and housewives from Teaneck would say, for $100, I'll have the lamp. No, it was the most boring two minutes in television. But because we had all those prizes, we had endless time between shows. Our dinner breaks would be... Two and a half hours long while they drove in new cars and boats and gazebos and stuff. So we had an NBC in Burbank. We had a place called Los Arcos across the street, which is Spanish, as you know, for the Arcos. And we go and they serve great margaritas. So we would go van and I would go across and have two or three or six and then come and do the last shows and have trouble recognizing the alphabet. They're really good tapes to get hold of. Who knew? He looks like the most straight legs. Absolutely. He's a wild man. He's getting loaded. Yeah, getting loaded before Wheel of Fortune. And be on the show on Wheel of Fortune drunk. I don't know how the guy still does it. People are so dumb sometimes. I mean, not everybody. There's plenty of smart people on there. And be like, oh, no, I'm sorry. He's been doing it for a decade. Yeah, he's been doing it since 81. I'm bad at puzzles.

2:05:32Are you? I'm good at word puzzles. I'm good at word puzzles. Yeah. I mean, the whole word could be, the whole thing could be spelled out for me. I'd be like, I have no idea. It's missing one letter. It's missing one letter. I would be so mad at you. Oh, yeah. Spelling is not my friend. Yeah. It would say the White House. Oh, man. The only thing it would be missing is the E at the end of house. I don't know what it is. I don't know. The White House-y? Yeah. The White House-k. Or the White House-k. The White House-k. The White House-k. The White House-k. Listen to this email and respond. Mikey, how do you guys feel about people bringing their kids to parties and staying well past their bedtime? Selfish much? M1 Hollister. That's poignant. What are you talking about? I think what they're talking about is people bringing their kids to parties. But, yeah, I get that part, but... Beyond their bedtime? Is there a bedtime on a weekend? Well, is there a bedtime that somebody else is allowed to set for your kids? Yeah. Yeah, to me, it's not even about the bedtime. It's more about bringing the kids to parties. Yeah. When I see kids out at restaurants late, I do think it's selfish. Yeah, I do too. If it's late. I understand if, like, well, you know, we were on the road and we had to eat or something like that, but, like, just hanging out, slinging them back while it's 1030. Isn't it a little bit selfish when...

2:06:54You bring a 12-year-old to The Exorcist of Emily Rose, you know? You see the parents bringing kids to a crazy movie. But I got no problem with a kid at a party. Matter of fact, Jasper goes to almost all the parties we go to. Do you know if it's a kid-friendly party or you just assume it and you take him? Well, most of the parties we go to are, I mean, other people have kids. So the kids are all running around like wild Indians. And we'll stay till, you know, 10, 30 or 11. Well, as long as they know. Yeah. As long as they know that you're bringing your kid, I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Even at Big Bear, there's a crazy house. Everybody's drinking and throwing back, and Jasper's just doing his own thing. He's watching a little TV, playing a little ping pong, a little hide-and-go-seek with Woods. That's a true story. 570-1949. Give us a call. Tell us what you think about that. If there's a, hey, please find a sitter.

2:07:50It's adults only. That's always our best. Yeah. What, you don't like it? No, I do. I'm saying if somebody brings their kids then, you're a jerk. Yeah. You're a jerk. If you've made it clear. If it's clear. Yeah, I like kids at the party. I had Jasper because I want to hang out with him. Hey, my deal is, you guys know me. If I was at an adult party with a bunch of adults and there was one kid there, who would I be talking to? I'd be talking to the kid. I'd rather be playing with the kid nine times out of ten. Yeah, but when it gets rowdy, like... I love rowdy. But that's not always... I mean, I grew up with it. I grew up, and we would... If we were tuckered out, you'd just go sleep in whoever's bedroom in the house that you're there. I didn't like that, though, man. It always freaked me out. It freaked me out as a kid, too. It never freaked me out. Because you hear them partying, and we... Yeah, we... My kids have all grown up around it, around just... Tons of people they don't even know and big parties and, you know. Tons of people they don't know. Beach bonfires and, yeah. It's fun. It's unsafe. They grew up fine. Look at them. I know, but does that mean that that's the right? I would take big groups of people way down into Mexico, people that I didn't know. No. It was like listener trips. Can you bring your kids around them? Surf trips. Absolutely, yeah. Oh, wow. I'd watch them the whole time. Yeah. You got to peep those kids. Yeah. You got to be real careful. They loved it.

2:09:11570-1949. What do you think about it? M1 Coop the Great is on the line from Linda Vista. You there? Yeah, what's going on? What's going on, man? How you doing? Good. First, well, first I want to say is that I tried to post some pics of me yesterday when I broke my ankle. Oh, yeah, we were doing bad, bad injuries yesterday. Yeah, and I posted it. I put it up on your fan page, and I accidentally put, like, Put it on there like four times. That's all right. Sorry about that. That's okay. Yeah, I flew back home from Jersey, and I flew back home a couple weeks ago, and I went to the movie theater with two of my cousins, and we're now watching The Devil Inside Me. Oh, gosh. Oh, wow. And it was a two-year-old in the front. Oh, come on. Oh, dude. Yeah. Oh, that is ghetto, man. You don't take a two-year-old to a horror movie like that. Yeah, I know. No, everybody in the front is like, are you kidding me? Dude. That's selfish, man. That's straight up selfish. That's the worst. If you can't find a sitter, you know what you don't do? You don't go to the movie. Definitely. Or you go to a family-friendly movie. Yeah, exactly. Go see Hugo. Yeah, or go see Chipmunks. Yeah, go see Chipmunks. Yeah, definitely. All right, see you guys. Let's go see Devil Inside Me because we can't find a sitter. No way. Shocking. Yeah. That's gnarly.

2:10:40Rihanna got thug life tattooed onto her knuckles. Good. You hear about it? No, I did not. Tupac bit? Tupac bit. You know, she's memorializing. Is that what it was? Was it an homage? Yeah, I guess so. Thug life for Rihanna. What do you think of that? I think that makes about as much sense as me putting thug life on my knuckles. Yeah, there's pictures of it on her Twitter. I have also seen a couple of tweets in the last couple of weeks between her and one Chris R. Brown. Really? Yes. Back and forth? Yes. There's a little bit of maybe rekindling of the old fire, the old flame between she and he. They've been spotted the same club. Yeah, I got my finger on the pulse of the whole thing. Who do you follow? Both. Both of them. You follow Rihanna and Chris Brown. So two guys on the show know about what Rihanna's up to. Yes. And I don't. That's true. Yeah. But you know everything about the Jersey Shore because you are addicted to the Jersey Shore. That is true. And the guys on the show know nothing about that. Yeah, that is true. 14 tattoos. Wow. Rihanna has 14 tattoos. The latest is Thug Life. Thug Life. I wonder if they count that as one.

2:12:04Or if each letter is its own tattoo. That's eight. She's also been spotted recently smoking marijuana just out in public. Wow. Just buffing charts. Just at the 7-Eleven? It could just be tobacco. No, no. Maybe she rolls her own. Yeah, she's definitely rolling her own. Her own cigarettes. From somewhere else. It's the Jay and Woods Rihanna Minute. Yeah, you guys. Yellow Diamonds. I don't know what that means. That's one of her songs. Oh, I don't know her songs. It's also official. Men have a higher pain tolerance than women. Hell yeah. It's official. Finally, we get our recognition. It's never official. Science is all theory. After all these years. There's no such thing as fact. Well, that's the whole thing is that science is not theory. It's all theory and they just get proved.

2:13:01But it still remains a theory. You do one thing painful and then you think you're all tough. Well, it's a report from Stanford. Stanford. It's a theory. Even gravity is a theory. Researchers examined 11,000 medical records where patients rated their pain on a scale of 0 to 10. And the women's average scores were 20% higher than men's. Wow. Maybe we just get hurt more. Really? No. There's no way. Women are equipped to give birth. We are equipped for a higher threshold. Can't argue with that. Cannot argue. I mean, they are. Now, but here's the deal. We are not equipped to give birth. So, therefore, we would have no idea how it feels. So, it may be less painful to us. We don't know because we can't do it. And if it hurts so bad, why you do it again? And again. And again. And again. And again. Because biology and God or... science or whatever you want to believe, makes it so that we can tolerate it because we have a high threshold. You guys would die if you went into labor. That's a bit that I've heard before. And it's not fair because we can't argue with it. We can't argue with it because no man's ever gone into labor before. Why do you guys always cry every time you're sick? I don't know. I never cry when I'm sick. I cry at American Idol. You get a cold or a snuff and you're like... Oh, I whine. I don't cry. I do whine. Wow. And I'm very dramatic. Yes.

2:14:26If I get an injury, I'm extremely dramatic about it. You know the reason is because you want your wife to take care of you. Yes, you want your wife to just love you. Just love us. We could go in a head-to-head competition with the airsoft guns, and I could shoot you, and then I could shoot Woods. I'm in. I'll do it right now. No. Back to back to back to back. I'll do it in the stomach. Oh, but wait. No, I don't like pain just because I can tolerate it. Yes. I'm not going to invite it. There is a difference. I need it. I need pay. You guys like it. You think it's funny. Well, it is. Woods and Jay. Woods and Jay will knock each other in the nuts. Yesterday? Yeah. I got him good, and then he hit me with... Underneath the table. Yesterday, Woods is sitting down. Sitting. And Jay gets on all fours without Woods knowing about it and takes a billy club. Yeah, a literal billy club. A real billy club.

2:15:21As hard as he can, jabs Woods, jabs, like poking a tiger, right in the nuts. From under the table. And you know what's different? If you're standing and you get slapped, it's different. Gravity takes a hold. Right. But if you're sitting, everything's kind of bunched together. So you kind of get three birds with one stone if you catch my drift. Jake came up from under the table with his evil laugh, and I said to him, you have problems. Let's see. M1 Relax is on the line from San Diego. Yeah, I'd like to point out that I think that statistic is skewed because in a doctor's office, and if a man is feeling a 10 pain, he's more prideful than a woman. Plus, they never go to the doctor. That's true. It's a much smaller sample size of men. Wait, do we not go to the doctor, though, because we have a higher threshold for pain? No, because you're afraid. You guys don't even go for regular check-ups. I spent plenty of time in the emergency room. Yeah, but you guys don't like to go for regular checkups because you're afraid you're going to be told something's wrong. I go yearly. You ladies don't have to get those painful proctology prostate exams. Yes, they do. They have to go. They do that in the gynecologist's office. Yeah, but they don't have to do a prostate exam. The front one. The front. Yeah. And I'm talking about men in general. I'm not just talking about you, Jay. You're like a daredevil. Yeah.

2:16:45Well, yeah, and he makes appointments with the proctologist just for fun. Just for fun, just because it's Wednesday. Any port in the storm? Any port. What's that have to do with being a dude? In the storm. What does that mean? It means I'll take something. As long as somebody's touching me, I'll take it where I can get it. That's what that phrase means? Yes. It's more like a ship in your port. You know? Which I welcome. L-O-B. I welcome it. I guess so. I don't. Hey, listen. Land hole. Skin is skin. Skin is skin. Even if it's covered with a rubber glove. Yeah. Or hair. It don't matter. What do I care? All aboard. Longest shot days on in the background. All meshes together. I need one of those aromatherapy candles. Aromatherapy. I need aromatherapy candle. You know them candles from Rome? Yeah, they smell so good. They're from Italy. Italy. Italy. That is on the line from Vista High. Oh, and about the pain.

2:17:52Yeah, you have higher pain tolerance because you're a dude. Yeah, it's official. What study is this? Stanford. Stanford. Pretty reputable school. I'd like to see their sample size. What were you calling to say, bro? 11,000. You know, the main argument on the women's side is the pregnancy, and I would get done if it was 60 years ago before epidural. Yeah. I forgot about that. Do it all natural. Excuse. That's just science keeping. I mean, you guys all take, like, Advil. Everyone takes painkillers. But we were designed to not have epidurals. I can tell you this. My wife did not have them. Oh, boy. It's like a badge of honor. Yeah, of course not. Super wife. Plenty of women don't have them. There you go. And that's just my wife. All right. I didn't have one. Well, I mean, I had... When Rebecca had our kids, I didn't get an epidural. I'm surprised. I had the crap kicked out of me. And with a broken elbow, beat up face. And I just went home, went to bed. Yeah. I didn't go to the doctor until the next. You passed out. Yeah, I was drunk. But still, L.O.B., if I was in major pain, I would have to go to the doctor. M1 Valerie from La Mesa. Hi. Hi, how are you? Good. Go ahead. Men just don't admit it. Yes, we do.

2:19:19No, you don't. It's agreed. Because it's too manly for you. Yep. Well, doesn't that mean that we have a higher tolerance? Yeah. That's exactly what it is. You're proving that we're bad asses. We'll complain to their wives, but they don't want to complain to the doctor. Complain to my wife. Because we're hard asses. Yeah, because we're hard asses. That's why. He complains 100 times a day. Who does? When my fiance gets sick, he reminds me 100 times a day. He wants you to love him. Sick is different. You don't understand. I can't even pick up this pen. That's identical me, what I'm saying. It hurts my shoulders so sore. Now, sick is different than hurt. I'm trying to think of a great explanation. If you dropped an anvil on my foot and on L.O.B.'s foot, who would it hurt more? Hurt L.O.B. more. I think so. She's got a little dainty feet. Not anymore. She's not going to let anything hurt her ever. Now, because of this study. Sticks and stones don't even break my bones. She'll get hit by a car today and be like, I'm fine. I will laugh on what I didn't say. I've never broken a bone. Oh, don't even say that. Oh, my gosh. You're brave. Tough as nails. M1 B-miz or B-mix. I can't read. B-mize. Sorry. B-mize. Go ahead.

2:20:34Yeah. Oh, that's buckets of ice water. Ooh. Ooh. How many regular Chuck Norris ladies? How many girls do you see in the huddle? What huddle? Oh, wow. In the huddle? Football. Well, there are girls who play football. There's an LFL league. No, I mean, there's a whole league. There's a league. The lingerie league. Have you guys ever seen them hit? They hit hard. No one would watch them. That's why they don't have their own league. It's not about pain. It's about ability. That is true. But the bottom line is that when it comes to the ability to tolerate pain... Men are better at it. I will take the Pepsi challenge with you. I am not your typical. I am not your typical. I admit I am a drama queen. Mama, I'm not going to give you the satisfaction of isolating that clip. Well, just say it so our audience knows what you were talking about. I'm a drama king. No, don't say that.

2:21:53That's not a phrase. You can't just make up phrases. You know what I'm saying. LB, what's a drama king? I think it means he's like the lord of the theater. Oh, yeah. You're the best in theater. There's music underneath me. I'm a drama queen. I am a baby. Mike, you're going to carry that weight. The rest of your life in a long time. Bye, gorgeous. Good job. Here's traffic. Excellent job. 570-1949. Or text. That is funny. At 949mikey at gmail.com. More coming up in just a couple. FM 94.9. You won't find more comfort for $3.99 than my Luxor. An extra large, extra plush modern sofa with luxurious soft bonded leather. And the Luxor sofa has pillow top seating and pocketed springs. All for an incredible $3.99 every day. Only at Jerome's. There's a reason BMW is number one. At BMW Encinitas, we're out to crush the competition by continuing to make the ultimate driving machine affordable.

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2:28:59This report is brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers, Toyota owners with a new year upon us. Now's a great time to bring your car to your neighborhood Toyota dealer. From batteries to tires, Toyota's got you covered. Boy, I'll tell you, we've got a lot of accidents all of a sudden, at least hazards. We've got a car that's stuck here on the 15 northbound past Carroll Canyon Road. Also the 15 northbound before the 56, a car that stalled. And it's right here on the 56 westbound right past the 15. They're waiting on tow trucks in that area. Another incident for you on the 94 westbound before Kenwood Drive. No injuries, but they are exchanging information, and it looks like there is a backup behind it. This report also brought to you by Wawanese Insurance with roadside assistance. They're one call away. Always 1-800-640-2920. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't know the difference between odd and even. Lauren. If there's a movie with Meg Ryan in it, I'm like, I'm out. I'm out. Woods. I got one word for you, dude. Gift. And J. I stole from the Rolling Stones dressing room. I got this little coffin thing.

2:30:08I stole it from that on FM 94.9. Yeah. Welcome back. This is Mikey's show. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. 41 years of age. Woods is 36. He's our sports guy. L.O.B. is our assistant producer. She is 31. And Jay is 48. He is our producer. And Nicole. Is 19 years old. She screens phones for us. Yeah. That's right. She does. Yeah. She does. Emphatically. Yes. Emphatically does. Sure. Somewhere in there was some sort of sex joke. Yes, there was. In that. In that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh. It's his go to. That's a go to lately. Woodsy. Yes, sir. Uh.

2:31:33You have something to tell me about Roger Goodell. Yes, sir. The commissioner of the NFL has been extended. Well, he hasn't been extended. His contract has been extended through 2018. Has been a pretty good commissioner. Helped navigate through the lockout last year. 23 of the top 25 rated TV programs during the football season were NFL games. It is a juggernaut. That NFL. It is. Yeah, so he's extended through 2018. No new terms were disclosed for the contract. And last night was the Battle of Los Angeles. It was the Clippers and the Lakers. Lakers took it 96-91. Kobe Bryant, 12 of his 24 points in the fourth quarter. And I would be remiss if I did not tell you that the Senior Bowl will be played this Saturday at 1 p.m. in Mobile, Alabama. And you can see San Diego State Aztec quarterback Ryan Lindley, you know. wanting to make a name for himself and get some NFL scouts interested in him. So I love the Senior Bowl. Yeah, Senior Bowl is fun to watch. Yeah, all the different helmets and stuff. It's awesome. Okay, so here's the deal. L.O.B. is going to be dancing like a Pussycat Doll. Yeah. Now, I've never seen the Pussycat Dolls on what their bid is. Really? You're missing out, buddy.

2:32:52They're all sexified. What is the deal, L.O.B.? Okay, I just landed from Mars, and I say, tell me about these pussycat dolls. It would be, okay, so if you're from Mars, I don't know if you know what burlesque means. Can I assume you know what burlesque means? Sexy sort of dance. Sexy, like, the costume is borderline lingerie. Yes. Okay. We'll probably be a little less risque than lingerie. Got it. Come on. That's too bad. But it's a choreographed dance. So you will not be wearing lingerie. We're going to get outfitted. I'm going to talk to Nikki a bit of burlesque. She's got a whole costume department, including some feather boas. Really? Yes. Pasties? No, not that. Well, pasties are not burlesque.

2:33:49Jay, that's a stripper thing. Well, they do it in Vegas. We're not doing that. It's a choreographed dance to a sexy song. And the girls will probably be somewhere between six and eight or something like that. We'll be on stage for one song and we will seduce you. Oh, wow. That is something. She's going to seduce us with dance. With our hips. With your hips you're going to seduce us. And some of the women that have breasts. Your hips don't lie. Yeah. Hips don't lie. I don't lie. The gift. Jay calls her. He calls her butt the gift. I wonder how your boyfriend feels about your co-worker referring to your butt as. I think he knows. Your elderly co-worker. Yeah. He gets to open that present anytime he wants. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, but isn't it still a little bit weird that your co-worker. No, I think. Maybe the difference between men and women or just him and I is I would get jealous or maybe not jealous, maybe just disgusted. Yeah. But he likes it. Your boyfriend. We're proud of it. When guys are like, check me out or something like that, he's like, that's right. That's mine. Did you see that? Yeah. That's mine. Yeah. I don't like it. I like it. I say, don't look at it. Yeah, you do that. I don't do that. Yeah. I like it. I don't really like it either, but.

2:35:13It's just a difference. I don't know what that difference is. It's weird that our wives, Mike, don't really have to worry about it with you and I. Not at all. So they don't really get that opportunity to. My wife doesn't have to worry about jealousy because I am not cute. I am fat now. this dangling gullet, which is just... Both of you guys. Which is awesome. Like, when you go out and you put your best clothes on, you're going to go out to dinner with your wife, and she walks out of the room, and she looks like a million bucks. And, you know, my wife's got big boobs, the cleavage. I'm like, gosh, darn. So do I. Still takes my breath away. And then I walk, and I get my best stuff on. I go, oh, boy, you pasty. I know. Doughy. Unfortunately, when I meet a woman, L-O-B, I'm measuring up. How ugly they think I am. Like, it's one of the... I go, well, I start at the point of reference is I know you don't think I'm attractive. Oh, boy. The thing is, how unattractive. Repugnant. Yeah. Am I repugnant? You would if you were hammered. Yes. Do I repulse you? Do I repulse you? Do I just make you uncomfortable? Yeah. Like, am I... Are you...

2:36:29Having to look away? Yeah. Like, am I Phantom of the Opera? Right, right. Have you seen someone as ugly as me before? Yes. Yeah. Or are you like, I better call a scientist. Yeah, yeah, I could see that. I'm not that bad, but I'm very self-conscious. You guys have both been told that you're cute before. Hey, wait, wait, wait, wait. Excuse, excuse, excuse. That man. Has been told that he's cute. Yes, Woods. Yes, Woods has. Yesterday, in fact. Yes, by... By a model. Yeah, by a model. What's a model? What is a model? Is that what I said? A model. I love a model. Yes, a model did tell him. Did say that it was Mark Cotte's wife. Jamie Cotte. Yes. Underwear model. A model. When... And I'm being completely serious. When people have said that they think that I'm cute, L.O.B., you know as well as I do. What? They were lying. She's laughing. What an answer. No, no, no. I want to know what you're going to say. You know that when they do that, it's like a feel sorry for bitch. You guys had people calling in ready to cheat with you. No, we didn't. We did? Yeah, like a year ago. I think that there are women that genuinely, because I said, listen.

2:37:54As bad as Woods gives himself whatever, you can give yourself whatever. Hello. The fact is, I still think, don't you think Woods is a good-looking guy? Yeah. I have personality. I have personality. The power of the microphone. Yeah, exactly. M1 Darlena from Del Mar, are you there? Hey, what was the word of the day? There you go. Big dinner. You are going to Pamplemousse tonight at 6 o'clock and hang on the line, okay? Yeah. Yeah, somebody wrote on our Facebook page, oh my gosh, I just saw Mikey for the first time. I thought that he was tall, dark, and handsome. I had no idea that he was short and fat. Someone wrote that? I thought they said a bald Mexican. No, they said short and fat. Somebody wrote that? Get that fatty some mudflat. Oh, that's really neat. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, listen.

2:39:00I got to deal with what I got to do. I got personality. Personality. Personality. Personality goes a long way. Mike. Yeah. You don't have to be overweight. You don't have to. Neither one of you guys do. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. I'm talking to you, too. I know. I'm working on it. He's working on it. He's doing something about it. I'm eating protein shakes. I'm eating oranges, apples. I've seen you. Chicken breasts. Is there anything worse than a woman telling you, Mike. You don't have to be ugly. Yeah, you don't have to be the way you are. No, no, no. I didn't say you were ugly. I just said... Mike, you don't have to be unattractive. You'd look great if you lost about 200 pounds. You were 200 pounds. Oh, my God. Whatever you were on your 40th birthday, I think, is where you should be. You should aspire to that. Yep. Maybe eat some chicken. Grilled. Not breaded. Not... You don't really need to eat. Burritos for every meal. Maybe don't eat six meals a day. Actually, you're supposed to eat six small meals a day. Small meals. No, big meals then. Small. They don't all have to be king size. It's like I'm a child. I feel it. Maybe don't eat fast food. Oh, boy. Ouch. Every meal. Mike, you'll have to work out too. You don't cancel all your workout appointments. Maybe get your mouth wired shut. It's killing me. It's killing me. Ah!

2:40:37If I were single, do you think that I could get a girlfriend? Well, we need, you and I both, let's say we were both single tomorrow. No, I mean, like, what if it was, yeah, today I could not do it. Yeah, you could. Yeah, you could. I couldn't do it today. A girlfriend or a one-night stand? A girlfriend. A girlfriend? Yeah. No, yeah, absolutely. Definitely. There's blind girls out there. Oh, Jay. Well, they'd have to be more than blind, Mike. I mean, they couldn't feel either. Right. Oh, no. They'd have to have no hands because if they felt your face, they'd be like, uh-oh. Uh-oh. Well. A girlfriend. Like today, you went out and you could find a girlfriend. You could meet girls because you have a good personality. Oh, I can meet girls. I can meet human beings. I wonder if I would be able to get. You would. You would. You would. Yeah, you would. You're C-level. Mike, don't listen to that. C-level celebrity. It doesn't hurt. You can get girls. G-level. G-level celebrity. M1 Matt, are you there? Yeah. How are you guys doing? Good. Matt is calling because you heard us do the missed connections. Yeah, are you guys still doing that stuff? Well, what do you got? I want to talk about this girl I met at the bar. Okay. Her name's Megan. I met her up at D Street in Encinitas. Oh, yeah.

2:42:03Man, I wanted to ask her out to the movies that night. She's like... That would be a strange thing to do. It would be, I think. To ask a girl out to the movies. The theater's right next door. I've gone back to watch a movie, quote unquote. That night, huh? Yeah. You want to come over and watch a movie? Wow, that's one I never tried in college. That was my only bit. I'm too embarrassed to tell you what mine was, so go ahead. Go ahead. So you're looking for Megan. Tell me about Megan. Megan is like kind of auburn hair. She's got to be in her mid-20s, I think. But she was just, I don't know, she blew me away. When was it? This was last weekend. D Street, last weekend. Megan. Megan, what night? I know just a few details. It was Friday night. I left work and headed over there. A little happy hour action? Oh, yeah. Yeah. And, I mean, she was just gorgeous, man. Well, you said Friday night? Friday night. Okay. Friday night. I know. D Street. And tell me about her. Tell me everything that you know about her so if she's listening. Yeah, we can try to find her. I know she works in advertising or something. Nice. Okay. I know she...

2:43:36Parked on the other side of the bar. Parked on the other side of the bar that you were at? Parked on the other side of D Street? Well, I followed her out. She kind of excused herself and said she had to go. I was like, I wonder what's the rush? Because we were having a good conversation. She parked behind the bar. Wait, wait, wait. Excuse. How do you know she parked behind the bar? Well, I just kind of walked her out, and I just wanted to make sure she... That's nice. Gentlemanly. That's gentlemanly. Did you walk her out arm in arm? Oh, no, I didn't get that far yet. I mean, I was working on that, but, yeah, I was just kind of... Did you follow her to her car? Well, I was getting ready to leave anyway, you know, myself. I just, you know, I wasn't with her, but I was behind, like, kind of...

2:44:40at a little bit of a distance, but not, you know what I mean? It wasn't. LOB looks like she's going to come out of her skin. No, I just wanted to make sure. I mean, she's got a great little car. I mean, she must be making some money. Oh. You followed her. Did she know you were behind her? I don't think she did. I mean, she kind of left. That's different than walking someone to their car. Yes. It's 180 degrees from walking someone to their car. Yeah. It seemed like she had somewhere to go, but... Yeah, probably home. Yeah. You didn't follow her home, did you? No, but I mean, I know... No, that would be weird. Yeah. I'm not a creep. I'm not a weirdo. I stood behind a light pole and watched her walk to her car. Yeah, nude. It's okay to make sure she got out of there, okay? I mean, I know she's on the other side of the five. That's chivalrous. Yeah. Very chivalrous. Maybe it is chivalrous. If you offered to walk her to her car, that would be chivalrous. Yes. If you stood in the shadows.

2:45:42That's more like stockery. In a trench coat. Yeah. Dark shadows. She's kind of like me. I mean, she likes to wash her car a lot because it looks pretty clean. Got a good look. That just made my stomach drop like I was on a roller coaster. Her windows are very clean in her apartment too, Mike. Just in general, I think she's clean. I love the welcome mat. It says welcome. And I really like it because the O is a daisy. I like the way she organizes her medicine cabinet. I don't see a problem at all. I like the painting above her bed. It's beautiful. I like the ceiling above her bed. You shouldn't follow Megan. I can't tell. Hey, Megan, if you're listening, give us a call. Yes. I can't tell if it's creepy or if it's sweet. I think it's creepy. Yeah, it was amazing. And I'm like, if she lives in my, you know, neighborhood, that would be so awesome because we could like, you know, reconnect. Do you live in Encinitas? Well, I took the boulevard back to, you know, I was like, she lives east of the five. So I'm like, okay. How do you know she lives east of the five? Well, I ended up just heading.

2:47:05Back my way. See? See? See? See? See? See? See? She was just on the same, we were taking the same route. Yeah, same route. Nothing weird. She's amazing, guys. You don't understand. I'm not that guy that is going to be like, oh, I'm showing up on your porch. Why would I do that? Well, I know where her porch is, but I'm not going to show up. That'd be weird. I've had guys show up on my porch before. Not welcome. I know that Matt says welcome, but you're not. Matt says welcome. I'm just following the instructions that you've left for me on your porch. Yeah. Skip a step, for example, for our next date. I just, I know where to go. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Meeting somebody is not a date. Yeah. If you meet somebody, that doesn't make it a date. Yeah, it doesn't make it a, you don't have a next date. All right. You have a first date. Our first date, that's what I meant. Yeah, first date. My skin's falling. I mean, she was awesome.

2:48:09Answer me this, point blank. Yeah. Point blank. Do you know where she lives? The general area. I know where she turned off. I'm not going to go in their subdivision. I'm not that guy. He knows that she lives in a subdivision. You know the neighborhood. Good luck. He followed her. Yeah, he followed her. He followed her. You followed her, bro. That's what Ted Bundy used to do. That's a major road, guys. That's what Ted Bundy used to do. Real good. Yeah, Encinitas Boulevard is a major road. It is. Yeah, it is. But knowing where the subdivision is, that's different. Think about watching yourself as if you were in a movie. Think about it from that perspective. Because that's how we're watching it. But we're watching it like that in our heads. We're watching it like it was a movie. We're picturing you who we made up what you look like in our head. We're picturing her who we made up in our head. And we're picturing you about...

2:49:1025 feet behind her. Right. She pulls into her car. You pull into yours. Yep. You go down Encinitas Boulevard. She goes down Encinitas Boulevard. She gets on the five. You get on the five. It's a rainy night. You're not listening to any music in your car, which is weird. That's very weird. Yes. You have a trench coat on and nothing else, which is odd. You know what else is weird? She is listening to something in her car. She's just singing this out loud. I'm just saying if I were Megan and I turned around at any point and saw you there.

2:50:20I would have said, hey, I didn't get your number. Oh, guys. No one's calling. I would have pulled out my pepper spray if you said, hey, I didn't get your number when I saw you standing there. You guys are making it all weird. It's not weird. We're not making it weird. I feel bad, but I don't. Yeah, guys, quit making it weird. I got no empathy from anybody in the room. Jay, maybe. Jay is also a rapist. Zero, zero, zero. Jay wears suits made of skin. Yes. Creep. I think it's romantic. One time. We had a good conversation. She had to leave. I wasn't assuming it was before. She had to leave your first date. Maybe she left for a reason. You're lonesome, ornery in need. Good luck. Good luck, dude. Maybe she'll call. Yeah, phone lines are not blowing up. Be the one to call her. If you're listening, give us a call. Yeah, come on. This is the Mikey Show. I like it. I like it. Be a part of the show. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. You're a nerd. More coming up in just a couple. FM 94.9. This is the FM.

2:51:49supported by our friends at AIS Insurance. What's up there, Chupacabra? It's Hillary with some shows for you to go check out. Friday night, go to the Casbah for the Howls, CD Release Party, Family Wagon, and Jesse LaMonica, and the Dime Novels will play, too. Saturday night, you can see Nada Surf at 4th and B with Republic of Letters. Next week, Mute Mather at 4th and B, and Dr. Dogg plays the belly up February 7th. On the 10th, FM 94.9 presents Young and the Giant at Soma, the Freya at House of Blues February 16th, and Craig Finn of the Hold Steady's at the Casbah, February 19th. And still to come, shows from Flocking Molly, Lagwagon, Colts, Portugal Demand, Tiger Army, Elvis Costello, Rise Against, M Ward with Firehose, Madness, Buzzcocks, and Two Weekends of Coachella. So there you have it. Get out there. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 concert calendar online at FM949SD.com. AT&T, ladies and gentlemen. AT&T is doing so much for you. AT&T U-verse. You can put your TV virtually anywhere you want. You do not have to be tethered to a cable outlet. In fact, now, if you want to watch the game outside or you just want to watch TV outside, you can. All you need is a power outlet. You can go in the garage. You can go anywhere you want because of their wireless receiver. You can move it outside for the barbecue, whatever. But you're no longer tied to the TV outlet.

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2:59:15Boy, I'll tell you, we've got a lot of accidents all of a sudden, at least hazards. We've got a car that's stuck here on the 15 northbound past Carroll Canyon Road. Also the 15 northbound before the 56, a car that stalled. And it's right here on the 56 westbound right past the 15. They're waiting on tow trucks in that area. Another incident for you on the 94 westbound before Kenwood Drive. No injuries, but they are exchanging information, and it looks like there is a backup behind it. This report also brought to you by Wawanese Insurance with roadside assistance. They're one call away. Always 1-800-640-2920. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Come on, get up. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I know a lot of girly stuff. Woods. I've bathed myself in ranch. Lauren. I'm all about the discounts and reviews. And Jay. Whenever I go to a party, I'll bring beer, but I bring beer for myself. On FM 94.9. M1 Joel from Spring Valley. Are you there? Yes, I am. What were you calling to say? I was calling to say, this guy's a creeper. Straight up. I think it's weird. I think it's weird because he didn't walk her to her car, and as the story went along, it started to evolve, and that's weird. And you guys need to let him keep talking. You guys keep cutting him off. He's digging himself in a hole. He knows it, too. I'm sorry. I know, but I felt bad for him, too. Well, you shouldn't feel bad for him. He's a creeper. Maybe he's just lonely.

3:00:57M1 Jesse from Solana Beach. Are you there? Yeah, I'm here. You have a similar story? Yeah. I was just saying that, you know, I'm listening to you guys talking to him. And at first I was just thinking like, oh, that's, you know, what a cute story or whatever. And as he was talking more and then, you know, you guys kind of picked up on that weird vibe. And my stomach just dropped because something just almost very similar happened to me. And, yeah, I met a guy, sounds almost the same, like in a bar and we're talking and there's a good little vibe going and stuff. And then something, when he said, like, she left all of a sudden. Yeah, she got creeped out. Yeah, like she's like, oh, I got to go. Yeah, and I did the same thing and I left and went home, didn't think anything ever about him again. And, you know, he was a cute guy, too. It was like there was nothing really weird about him at the time, just a feeling about. What? What? What?

3:02:25And I was so scared, but I was mad. I was like, how did you get in there? And he said, I swear to God, he said, well, I just tried my key in your lock and it fit. So I said, well, what are you talking about? What key? And he pulled out a key. So he had like come back, followed me home, I guess, come back the next day or something, called a locksmith, had a key made to my apartment. Like, this is crazy. Well, how could he get a key made for her apartment? How could he not? Just call a locksmith. Hey, bro, I locked my keys in the car. What if you know somebody that's a locksmith? That's weird. And they can make a key like that. Wait, did you call the cops? Well, I don't want to get too many details, but I'm just saying that this, like, is serious. And this guy sounds, like, exactly like the guy that did that. I mean, I don't think it's the same guy, but similar, very similar. And my stomach is in knots right now. I mean, it was the scariest thing I've ever... That's pretty crazy. I would call the cops. Yeah, call the cops. Sorry. Oh, gosh. M1 Alex from Chula Vista. Yeah, this morning I was listening to your guys' show. I heard that you guys announced that a shark spotted, right? Yes. In San Diego. So I waited and I was on my way over to the beach. And then...

3:03:54So I waited until 7 o'clock until you announced the spot where it was spotted. And then you announced that it was an IB. And I was like, oh, wow. I was already in my wetsuit. And there was a couple people out there. And the waves were pretty good. So I just, I was like, all right, might as well. Might as well give it a shot. Give it a shot. You know, cross my fingers and give it a shot. And there was nobody out there. Pretty creepy, dude. If you were not listening, a great white shark was spotted in IB yesterday. How big was it? How big was it? 16 to 18. 16 to 18. Oh, wow. Yeah, I could have parted off. Yeah, you probably could. Yeah, with a pistol. From the inside out. Yeah, from the inside out. You could hurt its feelings. Yeah, you could yell at it. You could poke its eyes out. Yeah, you could poke its eyes out. There's no lonelier feeling than being out there by yourself. Hey, you know what you could do? I don't do it anymore. If a shark swims up to you, and this is what all experts will tell you. Uh-huh.

3:04:55Kick it right in the balls. Yeah. Kick it as hard as you can. Yeah, or call him a fish. Yeah, or call him a fish. Fish. Oh, it hurt him. You fat fish. They say about sticks and stones, it goes for, you know. Goes for sharks. Yeah. But no, seriously, dude, kick it in the balls. Yeah, kick it in the balls. You punch it in the nose. Done and done. All right. Where are they? The balls? Yeah. It's between their legs. Between their legs. Mike. Yeah. What? You said that you were being serious. I am being serious. Kick it in the balls. He took you seriously. Excuse me? Thank you. I was being silly. Yeah. There's people like me out there that would believe you and then be looking for shark balls. Gosh, I said something yesterday. And L.O.B. goes, really? Yeah. Oh, what was it? I know what it was, but I don't think I can say it on the air. Let's see. M1 Matt from Del Mar. Are you there? Hey, can you guys hear me again? Yes, I can hear you. So, I didn't hear the first Creeper story. I just heard the Creeper story. Is that the same Matt? Your phone's breaking up. Yeah, he dropped all together. Perfect.

3:06:24You can't say what it was? Uh-uh. I don't think so. I just acted it out. People are so mad. They're like, we want to know. LOB is gullible. Yes. That's all you need to know is that LOB can be very, very gullible. Yeah. And she will fall for just about anything that you say. It's true. Yeah. Something was said that was inappropriate, and I believed its inappropriateness, which made me even more inappropriate. Correct. What if Disney just lift their band? I'll tell you when we come back. A part of the Mikey Show now. Text them at 949mikey at gmail.com or call Mikey now. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9.

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3:12:45Lease a new 2012 Subaru Impreza 2.0i CVT for just $149 per month post-tax. It's an automatic with a jack for your iPod and auto-dim mirror with Homelink. All for just $149 per month. At Kearney Mesa Subaru, we have a great selection of new and certified pre-owned Subarus. We're also San Diego's number one volume certified pre-owned Subaru dealer. Don't miss the Kearney Mesa Subaru brand opening event going on now. It just makes sense. Just minutes from anywhere in San Diego or visit SanDiegoSubaruDealer.com. At Exxon and Mobil, their smart gasoline works at the molecular level to help remove deposits so your cars run cleaner. It's one more way they make gasoline work harder for you. This report is brought to you by H&R Block. With H&R Block, Office Online, Mobile, and BlockLive, you can now prepare and file your taxes wherever, whenever, and however you like it. H&R Block, never settle for less.

3:13:50Well, we've got some backup this morning on the 125 northbound before Navajo Road. There's an accident there. It doesn't look like any injuries. Another one on Broadway just west of Sweetwater Road. You're going to find some delays in that area. The 94 westbound at Bancroft Drive, there's an accident. And a stalled vehicle here. The 94 is a pretty hot spot right now. The 94 westbound before Federal Boulevard, we've got one. And another one over here on the 94 east right before Home Avenue. It's a stalled vehicle. This report also brought to you by Constant Contact. Ever feel like you hit a roadblock when you're marketing your small business? Constant Contact combines email marketing with social media. It'll help you overcome that barrier. Visit ConstantContact.com and get started. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. A 57-year-old ban at Disneyland that people couldn't have beards. Brian Seacrest would be banned. Yes. Different type of beard. So would Tom Cruise. It's a different type of beard. Oh. Facial hair. Beards. No beards. No. There were not beards allowed. It was like the New York Yankees. Correct. You can't have beard. You play for the Yanks. You may have a mustache. Oh, please. Which is very creepy. It's true. That's stupid. You don't worry about them.

3:15:44Okay, they do just fine. I'm worried about it. It's a stupid rule. It's a stupid rule. So stupid it's the most winning franchise in sports history. Facial hair did it. Maybe they are, but that rule, come on. Come on. I got no beef with it. What, with the no beard for the Yankees? Yes. Welcome to Night 4 Night. I looked over at LOB and she's on her computer and then she goes, what, thanks for the Yankees? What are we talking about here? The Yankees are with Disney. Which one do you have the problem with? Both. Yeah, I have the problem with both. I don't have a problem with either. Yeah, professional. I go like a professional. Oh, you can't be a professional with facial hair. Didn't know that. No, but if that's what they want, that's their business. They pay you a handsome salary to have a dress code. I do agree. That's hair discrimination. Okay, Jay, so the NBA has a policy now where I can't, like what I have on now are workout shorts and a sweatshirt. Let's say I go to Cleveland, play a game, I get on a plane, I can't wear this. On a plane? No, I have to wear a suit everywhere I go. Do you have a problem with that? No. Wait, why? It's a dress code. So is that. But facial hair is a choice.

3:16:55So is your clothes. So is your best shorts. I don't think so. So you don't choose. I think he could look nice. Your boss, our bosses could come in here today and go, hey, guys, I want to tell you, y'all have to wear suits and ties every day. We would say, okay, you know why? Because your boss freaking told you to. I had to take my nose ring out. No, that's not true. Yes, it is. Wait, wait, wait. Rick Jackson cannot come in and say you have to wear a suit to any of us. Oh, yeah. He can enforce a dress code. There's no question. It's been done to me. We have an employee handbook with a dress code in it. They can enforce and change it. Yeah. And say, hey, here's an amendment. You have to wear a suit. Just wear a suit. I'm telling you, in radio, you can't. I'm telling you that Lincoln Financial could do it, bro. Maybe they wouldn't, but it doesn't mean they can't. They wouldn't. They can say no visible tattoos. They can't. And I defy Rick R. Jackson to come in here and tell us that he did it. Don't do it. Don't wear a suit tomorrow. I don't want to wear a suit to work.

3:17:56They can't. They can. No, they can. Mikey, they pay your salary. They can do whatever they want. At one radio station I did work at as a promotions director, I had to wear a jacket and a tie. There you go. A promotions director. Guys out building stages. Yeah, I was hauling trailers. He's throwing eggs at people. I had rips in all my good. I got a brand new pair of pants, and I ripped them that day. I was like, this is the dumbest thing I've ever heard of. They said that you had to wear what? I had to wear, it was like a suit with a tie. Like khakis at the time? Yeah. As a promotion guy? As a promotions guy. Yeah, man. Hey, by the way, if Rick is listening, I was just kidding. Don't come in here. Yeah, it was a joke. It was a joke. Yeah, you don't have to. I was just joking. I worked at a company where it was suit and tie every day. It wasn't pants and tie. It was suit and tie. Matching suit coat and pants. Well, dude, I guarantee you that if they said you have to wear a suit, that... we could file a lawsuit and win. No way. No way. And win. There's no way. Well, then why hasn't somebody sued the New York Yankees for having to cut their long hair or their beard? Well, I think it's New York State. Maybe it's New York State thing. I bet you it is. There's a dress code. I worked at a restaurant and there's a dress code there. I could get in trouble if I wore jeans. That's a restaurant. The dress codes are fully enforceable. I get the dress code, but you should be able to have facial hair as long as it's trimmed nicely. That's part of how you dress. Yeah. What about the bro code?

3:19:19What about the bro code? Fine. I thought we were just talking about codes. It's something that you have to sign. What about Morse code? What about Morse code? What about binary code? Yeah, what about that? What about the code of the ocean? Code of the West. What about the Contra code? HTML code. Now we're talking about codes that don't exist. Sure. That was real. There was a bunch of them in there that I've never heard. I said all real ones. Yeah, me too. It's the code of the West. There's a code of the seat. What about the code of conduct? Code of conduct? What about the code of many colors? How about the fact that... What about the code of chrome? How about Joseph and the amazing technicolor code? What about Jesus Christ, superstar? What about that, Mike? Code. Oh, boy. You got a really bad code? You got a snivel. Is that a bad code? You got a code. 5701949 is our number. Do you know that I'm like a mental patient? I know that you're like a mental patient. Yes, I do know that. I scrolled through our entire Facebook page to see if one girl said I wasn't ugly and not one freaking girl said I wasn't ugly.

3:20:40You didn't ask for it on Facebook. Yes, I did. I basically was putting it out there and saying, like, please say I'm not ugly. We'll check in five minutes. I bet you you'll get it. Somebody texted him, but I deleted it. What did it say? I went back, and I was like, did one, please, like, I hope just one girl said, oh, no, Mike, you're not ugly. I said it. Don't I count for anything? L.O.B., you said it in a... You did pity. Pity. No, I didn't. And I told you that it was your fault that you were overweight. Mike, you don't have to be heavy. Why don't I do her and Jay's voice? Mike, don't you remember? I told you that you were handsome. Remember? I said, it's your fault you're ugly. No, that's not true. I said, if you don't have to be ugly, you could lose some weight. Yeah, you're just buried under a layer of heavy, Mike. You're buried, Mike, underneath all those tubby-wubbies of fat. overweight. The weight is what the... Did you just say, I am almost overweight. I am. There is weight that your doctor sets. Yep. I'm way past that. Jay's almost overweight. Yeah. Jay's belly's not as sculpted as I thought it was. Oh, it isn't. I remember when we were playing, when he was playing bocce ball. Yeah. That was a couple years ago. A little something there. He looked like a tub.

3:22:07Yeah, you were a little... In a tub. His belly looked like... Oh, I definitely put on 15 pounds while I sit and eat with you slobs. That's why I stopped eating out. I decided to stop eating like you guys do. Hey, I have not bought breakfast one time this year. That's what happened to me last year. I've gone the whole time. Everyone saw a burrito. You slobs. M1 Heather from Oceanside. Great word. What? What? Anyway, I can't get the computer, but... I don't know exactly what you guys are talking about, but Mike, and I mean this sincerely. No, you don't. I totally do. You're a handsome guy. You don't believe that sincerely. I do. Why would she call in if she didn't? It's called a pity call. She could have sat in her car and just waited for someone else to call. Now, you're the one, you go to the school of the blind in Chula Vista, right?

3:23:01I sincerely mean it. I've met in person. You're a handsome guy. You are handsome. You look like an Iranian drug lord, which I think is so cool. Yeah, you know what? I mean, listen. I think that most young men aspire to look like an Iranian drug lord. There's a picture of you and I at the races. We went to the horse races. And I'm telling you, you look like freaking Don Corleone. Not Don Corleone, but you look like a Don of a family. It is so legit. Sharp. You look sharp. That's what you're trying to feed those cougars behind us. Yes. Yeah, that's right. They were feeding on you and you were feeding them. You're feeding them fried green beans. Yeah. Eating out of your own hand. You were holding those fried green beans and they were eating out of your hand like a little deer. They were literally and figuratively eating out of your hand. Eating out of the palm of your hand. Fingers all coated in ranch. Licking it off. I'm one richest from Serrano Valley. Mikey, I post this on Facebook. I'm going to say it to everybody who's listening. You are a very good looking man. You're so mean, Jay. You are beautiful, Mikey. Don't let anybody tell you. Let me hear this. You are beautiful. Go T and all. I love it. I personally love it. My husband's what as well? None of that stuff.

3:24:29She's like, my husband is ugly just like you, Mike, and I love him. I love him. It's what's on the inside. Yeah. It's what's in the inside. Layers and layers of fat. Did she say my husband's husky too? Husky. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Mikey, you are a husky. You're a husky burrito. You're a little husky burrito. Mike, it's okay. My husband is husky. Thank you for the call. I got L.O.B. so good. The old backhanded compliment. Holy smokes. Holy smokes. I am going to get a face transplant. No. All right, we got to go. There's nothing wrong with your face. No, it's not your face. It's not your face. Mike, there's nothing wrong with your face. It's everything below your face.

3:25:38Everything south of your forehead. Well, okay. Everything north of your forehead is actually nice. Okay, now everything below your forehead is a bit unsavory. You have to start by loving yourself, my friend. I do. Temple. Temple. Your body is a temple. Well, Max is a large temple. Room for everyone. That one up in Salt Lake City. Yeah, man. This is the most giant temple ever. All right. A very good-looking person is on the radio next. And I mean good-looking. Hillary. Lovely and sound that Hillary is up next. And we will come back tomorrow morning at 5.30 and do it all over again. The mic shows out.