The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 02/16/10

0:00KBCT San Diego, Lincoln Financial Media Station, the new home of the Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. They call today Fat Tuesday, so you fit right in. Me and you both. That's right. Chubb's Tuesday, right? Dude, Jesse just told us, too, that Mardi Gras actually means Fat Tuesday. That's right. So we're finding stuff out. Mardi is Tuesday, and Gras is Fat. There you go. You can call us. 570-1949 is our number. And our text is 949mikey at gmail.com. It's pretty easy to use and we'd love to hear from you. A lot of things happening in the news we're going to be telling you about. We're going to be hitting on the Mardi Gras stuff going on. We're going to tell you the latest with Kevin Smith and him being upset at Southwest for kicking him off because he's too fat. He's too gras. He's too gras. That's a great call, dude. He's too gras. Right?

2:03Welcome to the program. My name is Mikey and I'm 39 years of age and my name isn't Mikey. It's Mike. But many years ago, 15 years ago, Guy was my program director. I was getting off the air one afternoon. It was like a Saturday. And excuse me, the guy was getting off the air before me. I was coming on the air. And the guy just very flippantly said, Mikey's up next, even though. I referred to myself on the air as Mike Esparza. That's what I went by on the air, which is my name. And the guy said, Mike, he's coming up next. And so my boss heard that, and he called me on the inside line. I picked up the phone. Hello. And his name was Greg Stevens. Greg actually worked in Dallas for a while. I don't know if you met him. Don't remember him. You don't remember him? No. I was drunk a lot those years. That's very true, Woodsy. But Greg called me, and he said, And I said, oh, yeah, that was funny. And he goes, I think it would probably, I think it'd be good if you called yourself that. And I said, oh, no, but that was, I thought it was funny, but I don't know that I'd want to actually go by that. And he went, and I went, oh, well, then okay.

3:52And so from that point on, it was Mikey and then just stayed that way. Nice. Did no one really ever call you Mikey growing up? No. Hey, Mikey. Nobody. I never went by Mikey until that day. I never knew that. Yeah. Now I know. Never went by Mikey until that day. And I thought it was a childlike name then. And I still think it's a childlike name, but it's a nickname. It's stuck. And then it all changed. Yeah. So half the people in my world call me Mikey and half the people in my world call me Mike. And I go by either one. I'm fine with it. You know what I mean? 570-1949. At the beginning of the show, we'll do a thing where you can call about any topic that's out there. You can call about Mardi Gras. You can call about Kevin Smith. You can call about Jay-Z and why he's in the news. You can call about the Olympics. You can call about the dude that fell into Mount St. Helens. You can call about any of the stuff that's out there. There's some crazy stuff out in the news. Woodsy is our sports guy and didn't throw the contacts on today, but I like the way he looks in the glasses. He has a look like a lot of different actors. Woodsy can look like a lot of famous people. Paul Blart. Kevin James. Oh, what? I don't get the Kevin James. I don't either. Sienna clearly gets the Kevin James. She just likes to rub it in. He's a little on the bigger side. I am not.

5:15No, I didn't say you're on the bigger side. Kevin James is on the bigger side. Chill, homie. Wait, when is he Paul Blart? What does Paul Blart mean? He was in a movie called Paul Blart Mall Cop. Watched it the other day. Oscar winner. Yeah, Oscar winner. But I think Woodsy also looks a little bit like Robert Downey Jr. I think he looks a little bit like Woods just gave Sienna a look right now. Take that. See? Right? And a little Vince Vaughn. I like the double V. Johnny Knoxville. Johnny Knoxville is what I got big time when I first met him. A bit of that. Lauren O'Brien is 29 years of age. And we gave her a hard time yesterday about Valentine's Day. We sure did, didn't we? How was your night last night? My night was fine. Matt was listening the whole time. It's nothing that he didn't already know. That's right. Nothing he wasn't used to. Yeah. In case he missed it, she didn't get her boyfriend. Anything. I got him love. And lunch. And lunch. Love and lunch. Big burger. Wrapped up in a bow. Now, he feels differently about Valentine's Day. They'd get Lauren a card. Yeah, we didn't do any material things. Yeah, he just booked a room at the hotel. Nice dinner. By we, you mean you. Didn't do any material things, which is true. That is true. We didn't. No, we didn't. He did.

6:41Touche. Touche. Sienna. Sienna is the gal to my right. And she is our news girl. She is 24 years of age. But I think very wise for her age. Yes. She seems older than, more mature than 24. Sometimes. She's an asshole. I'm getting married in 11 days. Oh, wow. That is weird. 11 days. I didn't believe that. I know. I can't either. Are you freaking out yet? No. No, I mean, I'm not nervous at all. It's just coming down to the wire here, all the planning. Last night I had to email the church where we're getting married and send, you know, the list of the groomsmen walking with the bridesmaids and blah, blah, blah. It's just, you know, a lot of detail. Yeah. Why has Todd not asked me to be a groomsman is what I really want to know. We both already have 10. I think we have enough. Are you kidding me? Yes.

7:41I have 10 bridesmaids. I thought we were tight, dude. Two flower girls and a ring bearer. No, he's mad at you right now. He is? Yeah. Why? Because he voiced, he's not really mad, let me just clarify, but he voiced that he wanted to play baseball, and you're like, dude, we should totally play together, and then Woods is like, going to tryouts, didn't call him. He needs to come out, and he needs to watch the squad, and I guarantee you we'll take him. Guaranteed. He's above all that. Yeah, he's like a minor leaguer. He doesn't want to play in this league. No, but he really should. He actually played minor league baseball. Yeah. On the real Brewers. And I play on the Brewers. So I think it's karma. He hasn't played in a while, though. So a little rusty. It's like riding a bike. Yeah. Do you have to let them know stuff like that? That's not fair, right? What do you mean? Like, let's say. I played against a lot of old, like, college and minor league ballplayers. You did? Yeah. And guys that played down in the Mexican leagues and stuff. You can't. But Todd is 38 years old now. He was like 19 when he was in the minor leagues. So I think it's a little different. They have a 38 and over league, too. He could probably dominate. I mean, as long as he can get a handle on the incontinence, I think he can really do it up. For sure. You know what I mean? That's crazy. It's not that crazy. It's like as long as the person is still capable, I think it's okay.

9:06And then we have Jay, who is our producer. And Jay is 46 years of age. 46 and loving it. That's right. I don't know what that means. And wait until I tell you about Jay later. Jay and I lead different lives. Very much. And I will explain that in just a little bit. Your phone calls right now, 570-1949. Got to say it again, man. The way that the... Just this wave of Mikey show stuff is happening right now is cool. Like it's building and building and building every day and more and more people every day. There's more and more people getting on board, digging it. I love it. It's awesome. And if you haven't, if you don't know, an M1 is a Mikey show listener. All right. An M1, when they call in, they turn their radio down, get to the point and don't cuss. You are a part of the M1 nation if you are a Mikey show listener. And we want you to make more M1 Nation members. And the way that you do it is tell them to listen. You get them to listen exclusively to The Mikey Show for long periods of time. And why? Because we put a lot of work into it. We're doing a lot of stuff here. There's a lot of shows that will repeat their material during a show. We don't do that. We got enough material, if we wanted to, to keep going.

10:32You know, that's the deal. That's what an M1 is. Call us, 570-1949 or text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. This is M1 Adam. What's up, dude? What's up, Mike? How you doing? I love the new show. I love the new cast. You guys are awesome. Thank you. Thank you, man. So, Mike, you're not going to like this. It'll probably give you chills because you're germaphobe. But last night, something horrible happened to me. I am a guy who sleeps with his mouth open. Oh, don't let go. Oh, I don't know if anything happened in the mouth. Okay, okay, okay. But other parts of the body it did. Immediately thought spiders. Not spiders, worse. I woke up because my arm was itching and tickling, and I woke up to watch a mouse run off my arm. No, no, no, no, no, no. Wow. No, you didn't. Wow. Oh, my gosh, that makes me want to die. Yeah, 1.30 in the morning, I slept like a baby the rest of the night. Oh. Yeah, right. I am. I hate. He's still awake. Rodents, man. Yeah, he hasn't slept yet. Oh, me too. I hate rodents. And I don't know how to get the guy, you know. He was in my bedroom. My bedroom's huge and it's got all kinds of hiding spots. I can't sleep in there again. You have to set up traps. Now, when we first moved into our house over the summer, there was mice in there. Don't hurt the mice. You have to get rid of them. I can't sleep with them creeping around. Get out of here. He's failing at his job.

11:59I mean, the ultimate job of a cat is to protect the king's horse from any sort of rugs, and he's not doing that. Get the traps, put a little peanut butter and cheese in there, and they're done. Don't hurt the mice. Lead them out the door. Oh, get them out of here. Yeah, please do that. Don't hurt the mice. Oh, no. Get them out of here, little thing. There's also something you can buy that sets off, like, a high-pitched noise that humans can't hear, and I don't think dogs or cats can hear it, but little animals can, and it chases them out of the house because they don't want to hear it. I tried that before. When I first bought my house, it had a huge, it was a new house, and it had a huge mouse infestation because of all the construction. I got 13 mice the first two nights I was there. Good Lord. Beaver things didn't work. Dude, I'm telling you, I would move out. No way. Move out of the house. What are they going to do? They're more scared of you. I don't care. They're gross. They're gross. They're sweet. With their little feet and their whiskers that probably rub up against. Didn't you ever see the Green Mile? Yeah, dude. Gross. That wasn't sweet. It was gross. I want to go to Mouseville. I know. I love you guys. Thank you, bro. Their little mice feet walk on doo-doo. What's worse, that or I had a cockroach on me when I was in Thailand? You ate cockroaches in Thailand? No, I woke up with it crawling down my arm. Hideous.

13:25Hideous. Hideous. Get used to it. You do? Never. Yeah, I don't know that I would ever get used to that. It's filthy. Well, there goes my plans to ever go to Thailand, ever. So, Mardi Gras today. Today is Fat Tuesday. And by the way, we're going to have the Grand Marshal of Mardi Gras, who is the dude that plays Daryl from The Office. How do you like that, baby? Love it. Love it. One of my favorites. I've been so excited all night. Were you? Yeah. It's cool, right? I have a couple little Mardi Gras factoids that if you want to go out and get a good deal, TGI Fridays is offering half price on appetizers and new drinks today for Mardi Gras. Also, Mardi Gras and the gas lamp is going on tonight. And 70% of Americans, a poll was up, said that they would vote to have a holiday on Mardi Gras. No work. 100%. But who's the 30% that says no? I know. Well, so we get the holiday. What are you going to do?

14:27I'm going down to the gas lamp. Yeah, you're going to celebrate TGI Friday. Do you remember the parade that we did in Dallas? Yes. Oh, my Lord. That was so much fun. Immediately, I think myself, Woods is thinking about that. We had a blast. Mikey, Eddie, the whole bunch on a big float down through the West End throwing beads. Maybe some boobs were around. I barely remember any of it. I remember all of it. You do? Yeah, it was a blast. Me, Bauman, you. It was a real treat. Different time. In New Orleans today, they're expecting 750,000 people. Really? Yeah, it's going to be insane. So jealous. I know. That's crazy! I wouldn't want to be around it. Really? I'd be exhausted. Vomit. I need to take a nap. 20-year-olds, like, watching the real world. It's like watching the real world to me. I get nervous. I think of Mardi Gras. You would be so nervous. Instantly I'm nervous. You'd lose your friends. Somebody's fighting and there's probably a girl on her cell phone texting with like one high heel and she's crying. It makes me anxious to think about that. It makes me anxious. Not Woodsy. She's all in. All the way in.

15:36Hey, Kevin Smith says he's not going to ever fly Southwest again because they kicked him off the plane for being too fat. This thing is turning into a huge story. Southwest has now apologized for a second time to Kevin Smith. They said that they should have communicated to him better. However, he was overweight, you know. And too overweight to fly? Yeah. And so they're standing by that. They're standing by it because, you know, obviously they're not going to back down to what they did. They kicked a public figure off of a plane, but they just they apologized. They said they could have handled their communication better. However, Kevin is still furious about it. And I guess last week he flew on Southwest 10 different flights in one week. So he's a big, big supporter of Southwest. And he said, I'm never going to fly Southwest again. Wow. And I guess he also said that he was able to put the armrest down and he was able to put the seatbelt on. Like, he should have been fine. You just smear it with butter and it slides right down your seatbelt. Yeah, exactly. That's right. I hate flying. It's the worst. It's a beating. It's such a beating. Is there a weight restriction? I still don't understand. They just say an arm thing has to go down.

16:44As long as the arm thing can go down, you're fine. He doesn't seem that big. I mean, I'm thinking you've got to be overflowing it to where the person next to you is, like, touching. Right. Obviously touching. And, I mean, that must have been the case. I don't want to touch anybody, though. Sweaty. I don't want my arms touching anybody. No way. I don't either. And I don't like the talkers on the planes. God, just get. You are so the talker. Get. The first time I ever had breakfast with Lauren O'Brien. Right. First time we ever met. One of the things that I asked her was, I said, on an airplane, are you a talker or do you stay to yourself? And she said, stay to herself. She's a stay to herself type of person. Doesn't really go for it. But I said I would do the obligatory. Answers. Yes. And I would try to end it as soon as possible. Woodsy, do you talk to the person next to you? For like the first 10 minutes, and then I settle in with a book, my iPod, my PSP. But you set the tone if you start the 10 minutes of talk. That depends on what they look like, too. Really? I think I remember when we first met, you were saying, well, I sat next to this chick on the airplane. Yeah, well, exactly. But if it was a guy, you're not the guy to go.

17:56Are you sure, Woodsy? I'm not sure. Just random conversation. You're not the guy that goes. It really depends on my mood, man. But I love to read and I love to listen to music. And I like to sleep on the plane. So I don't really like to sit and gab the whole time. Even if it was the hottest guy in the world, I would be like, goodbye. Yeah. I'm sleeping. Don't talk to me. It's my personal space. I don't have enough as it is on this tiny little plane. I hit it off with a girl one time from a flight from San Diego to Phoenix. She liked me. I was thin. I was also doing cocaine and methamphetamine at the time. But that was a different time in my life. One time I got off a plane and the girl that was sitting next to me was at the restaurant sitting next to me the same day. I was like, I think I sat next to that chick on a plane earlier today. Did you say anything to her? No. My personal space. Yeah. Did you guys hear that Jay-Z is not digging the new We Are the World? Of course not. He wasn't on it. Maybe that is why. Or he just has good taste. No, he just basically, it's because he says, you know. Lizzie hates it. That was Michael Jackson's hit. No one should have touched it. It's like thriller. You can't redo that. Why not? You're raising money, Jay-Z, for Haiti. He understands that, but he's just like, they should have come up with something new. Yeah, that's what I was saying. Come up with something, I mean.

19:23Everything's a retread these days. I like what they're doing with it. I like how the profits are going towards Haiti, but I think they should have come up with something else. I listened to the whole thing yesterday, and I do have to agree that... Why is that weird? You're joking, I know. But the rapping part at the end. Terrible. Yeah, it's a little unfolded for. You don't like it? I mean, I was thinking, there's some parts, like I like Akon because I think he has a good voice, but then there's some parts that get all crazy, like with Kanye, and I'm like, all right, now this is a totally different song. Yeah, there's no way that you can listen to it and not compare it to the original. Unless you're 17, you've never heard the original. But if you're 18, you have heard the original. Then you do make the comparison. 5701949 is the number. Text us 949mikey at gmail.com. Huge show today. We have so much stuff that we're doing today. Did you hear who was named player of the decade in the NBA? And is it who you think or is it not? Woodsy will tell us next. Is the Mikey Show on FM 94.9.

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24:22While the economy is getting worse and worse, there is no better time than now to file bankruptcy on your debts and walk away from 100% of it for good through this program. For more information, call America's Bankruptcy Hotline now. 800-304-0661. 800-304-0661. Again, that's 800-304-0661. Well, it looks like we've got a Jeep that's causing a few problems this morning. This report, it is brought to you by Kaiser Permanente. At Kaiser Permanente, they believe that simply taking better care of yourself is one investment strategy that always pays off. Learn more at kp.org slash thrive. El Cajon Boulevard, the ramp to the 805 northbound, a disabled vehicle that's over on the right shoulder. It's an abandoned Jeep that they have moved. Looks like the 805 southbound between Mesa College Drive and the 8 where we are also seeing just a little bit of slowing at this point. This report brought to you by TurboTax. TurboTax will guide you through your taxes step-by-step to get you the maximum refund that you deserve. TurboTax. Choose easy. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Now, more of the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Let's just do it some wilding. Let's get you, dude. Love that song. Velvet Revolver. Too bad that had to end. I know. Well, STP's back together, so it's all good. Here we go. Just let this whole thing roll.

26:16I'm telling you. I love it. It's good stuff. I love it. Sienna could not have freaked out more about that baby elephant this morning. It freaked me out. You guys, you're not excited? It freaked me out how much you were into it. It's cute. I think I should take the wife to see this weekend. You should. San Diego Zoo. I hear it's pretty nice. Yeah, it's pretty nice. Only the best zoo in the world. That's right. Woodsy's new to town, and she might really like it. We both love animals, so. If you live in San Diego, you'd do it one time. No, you get an annual pass. That's what my wife has. Why wouldn't you? She has an annual pass. She does? How many times has she been? Twice in 18 years. I used to go all the time when I was a nanny. I would bring the little boy once a week. That's the thing about going back to the zoo. Cool. It's the lions again that I just saw. I feel bad when I go back. You do? Yeah. Because the animals are all caged. I know. It kills me too. Go support them. I'd rather go to the wild animal park. What's that? That's boring. They hide from you.

27:22Cool, bro. Wild Animal Park is like the zoo, but you see them in their natural environment. Yeah, I like it. So you see them in Africa. Yeah, in Escondido. In Escondido. Yeah. A lot of lions and tigers. Lots of indigenous animals in Escondido. Well, a baby elephant was born Sunday morning on Valentine's Day. Oh, no. Is his name Valentino? No, it doesn't have a name yet. But it's so cute. And I didn't know this, but apparently it's an African elephant. And apparently it was born at 2 a.m. in the morning and all of the elephants trumpeted when it was born. It's actually African-American. No, it's an African elephant. They're the ones with the bigger ears. You can call them elephants. Okay. She is three feet tall and averages 250 to 300 pounds. Fuck me. Imagine birthing one of those big boys. 570-1949 is our number. Or text us. 949mikey at gmail.com. Mikey and Game M1 Tejas here. What's the name of the opening song that you guys play again? I love it. Love you guys. You're awesome and great to have in the morning. The song is Linkin Park and it is No More Sorrow. We play that every morning to start the show. A lot of stuff happening in the world of sports. Woodsy's going to fill us in a little bit on...

28:45Who was named the player of the decade in the NBA? Yes. Who is it? Yes. I will say Shaq. No, it is Kobe. Really? Yeah. Of course. It is Kobe. Right. So they were at the All-Star Game in Dallas at Jerry World, and they made the announcement that Kobe is the player of the decade. Yeah. So, I mean, he's a beast. Who would be the other argument for it? LeBron? No, I don't think LeBron's played a full decade. Dwayne Wade, maybe? No. Something Shaq would be, you know, a consideration. Oh, this isn't all-time athletes. Right, right, right. This is the last 10 years in the NBA. Yeah, I guess Kobe's the only one. Maybe Shaq, no? Yeah, Shaq is up there, but he's really declined. Allen Iverson? No. Kobe's crazy. He's so good. He's, like, crazy good. I don't even like basketball, but I'd pay to watch him and LeBron play. He's so modest, too. He's not the best person. They all are. They all are so modest. Metal count. We got a metal count from the Winter Olympics. Are we still on the lead? We're killing it. Yeah? Yeah. Knock on wood. Knock on wood. How are we doing? We got eight. Really? Germany has five. We have two golds, two silvers, and four bronze. Yeah. Speaking of bronze, Bodie Miller, biggest mouth in Olympic history, finally won himself a medal at the Olympics. Really? He finished third, so he won the bronze, but he missed out the second place medal, the silver medal, by like .200th of a second. What do you mean, he's a talker?

30:12Oh, dude. I didn't know. Did you not know? Runs mouth? He runs crazy mouth. Really? Yeah. And so before the last Olympics where he blanked, he was running a lot. I mean, he's won a ton of races, just not when they counted. He was like A-Rod. But now A-Rod's got a ring. I'm not. Anybody that's listening to me for any period of time knows that I'm not down with the running mouth. But, man, if you're going to do it, you better back it up. If you're going to do it, you better win. Yeah. Period. I mean, you just got to. For sure. Also, Seth Westcott, who's an American snowboard cross person. Snowboard cross is like a long distance type run on the snowboard. He won his second gold medal. He won back in 2006. Yeah. So that's pretty cool. And, oh, a little local flavor for you. The San Diego State Aztecs have named a new athletic director. What they've been saying about the program here is. that it's basically a sleeping giant. It's one of the most beautiful places in the country. Why don't they want to play here? And why don't they get good recruits to win? They brought in this gentleman, Jim Sterk, and he is previously the Washington State Athletic Director for the last 10 years. Supposed to be a pretty high-profile guy.

31:22and he's going to try to awaken the sleeping giant. I would love to see them be great at basketball and football and all of that. I went to San Diego State, and I did not go to one sporting event. That's part of the problem, too. Maybe they didn't get everybody all fired up about it. Yeah, that's probably a big deal, too. Oh, and tomorrow is one of my favorite days in the world. What is it? And pitchers and catchers report. So baseball's here. Baseball is here. Now we have like... two months of spring training reports that you're going to hear from me and all kinds of stuff. I love it. M1 Jimmy, you there? What's going on? Well, on a Valentine's Day gift, I was sitting there laughing to myself as I drove to work because I had already had a plane. Why? Because, well, I drove down to San Diego and I took my fiance and I. We drove down and we went to stay down in San Diego, down in the Gasland District. Right. And I had reserved the room and I reserved specifics on the room with some chocolates to be there. when we got there in Champaign and a bathtub with a large bathtub and ended up getting a Motel 6 room with nice bed sheets. Really? It was how she described it. Really? And then I had reserved reservations at a restaurant in Del Mar, right? That's right on the beach. Yeah. And we got, so I was just like, okay, well, nevermind the hotel. We'll just go in there and then we'll leave. Well, like we get to the restaurant. Perfect. Dude, this sounds a little bit fishy. It does?

33:05I mean, I have your back that you did all of that. That's amazing. Really, really nice. But if it was a real nice hotel and you did all that, there's no way she would complain. Yeah. Something went wrong. She didn't complain at all. I complained because she didn't have anything I wanted. They didn't do any of the stuff that you arranged. Right. The stuff that I paid for. And they're like, well, you know, you didn't pay like a certain amount. So you don't get that. There's no guarantee. on certain things. How brutal is that? You go out of your way for your lady to have all these different things arranged for her. And then you're just embarrassed. And you get there and, well, I mean, you're not embarrassed because you, I guess, because you think, maybe she thinks it's nice, but imagine if you went through the trouble of doing the extra. I'm so mad. Yeah, same thing happened to us. What? What happened? Matt was, like, expecting things to be up there when we got there. Really? And they weren't, and he had to, like, in front of me be, like, so... Supposed to be some... Oh, that's the worst. And then it was like, oh, there it is, once we got back up there. It's weak. Oh, that's terrible. Did they do anything for you, bro, in order to make it up? No, they told me that if I wanted to, they said you can upgrade your room for another $700. What? I was like, no, I'm okay. Can you just refund my money and everything? Well, typically we don't do that. So I was like, okay, can I talk to the manager then? So I ended up having to talk to the manager, and I told him the whole story. I was like, look, I requested shit.

34:32Well, yeah. He's like, well, we can arrange for a rose petal to be brought up tomorrow afternoon at 4 o'clock after checkout. One rose petal? One rose petal. You just have to freak out on them and freak out and throw a scene and they will do whatever you want because... I like to hold my breath and stomp my feet. Yeah. Well, that's why I'll never get anything done for me because I can't do it. If I'm mad, like, I feel bad, too, doing it. But if I'm really mad, like, if I was him and they did nothing that I had asked, I would have freaked out. I'd be like, dude, this is Valentine's Day. What kind of a hotel is this that you guys don't do anything? I want to talk to a manager, and I want to talk to a manager now. You probably get stuff done. That's the only way. The squeaky wheel gets the oil or whatever. Squeaky wheel gets the grease. Lauren, can you do that? Can you throw a fit like that? Oh, yeah. You can? Oh, totally. I can see that. Yeah, Woodsy, the other day, he goes, listen.

35:37Because Lauren's a quiet little girl. Let me tell you something. She can slit your throat. She'll slit you real quiet. She won't even know. She'll slit you real quiet. She'll cut you real deep. That's what I told you. I got somebody real good yesterday. You did? Yes. What happened? Well, I was following off my exit. There was this woman in front of me who was a terrible driver. She just kept making like one bad move after the other. It was a woman. Yes, of course. Of course, Woods. We're so terrible. But, yeah, so then she happened the whole way in front of me. You could see I did not even react to that at all, just staring at you. Go ahead. But, yeah, so then we get to, like, all these stupid moves, and she parks, like, right next to me. Yeah. So I slammed the door to my car, and then I went to get into my building, and I went, worst driver ever, and then slammed my apartment door. Amazing. It's the most. Passive aggressive. You know what, though? That is ballsy. Walking into your house, now she knows where you live. Oh, did she see you going into your actual apartment? Well, I mean, it's a building with multiple apartments in it. Classic. M1 Paparazzi is on the line. Hi, Paparazzi. Good morning. Morning. What's going on? Well, first of all, since she's talking about bad drivers, Woods, you got to go on YouTube and do a search for bad parking jobs.

37:05Every single once, women drivers, and they're hilarious. Weird. Oh, that's so ironic. Oh, man, that is irritating, Lauren, to no end. Excuse me, I've been in the car with Woods. I drive fast. No. We were on the freeway, and on the edge of the freeway, there's a dip, you know? Like, on the edge of the freeway, like, don't go off the dip. He's over the dip. I'm like, you have precious cargo. Come on, man. I'm never going with you again. What's the deal with you and your driving? I'm a terrible driver. You are. I drive fast. I smoke. I've got the radio on. I'm on my phone. Write that down. The whole bit. I wonder, out of all of us, who's the most responsible driver? You. Yeah. Really? Yeah. You. You or Jay? I'm so solid. Are you Jay? Weird. I've driven with Jay. He's good. I can see Jay. I baby it. I used to like to drive fast, but. And again. What's that? You good at driving? I used to. I'm good if I'm by myself, but I get like stage fright when people are in the car with me. I'm like, you're judging me. I'm not going fast enough. I'm terrible. I'm not putting my train signal on. I get 70 tickets a year. You do? What? So many tickets. Do you pay them? Yeah, I pay them.

38:15I get an attorney to take care of them. You do? Yes. Oh, my gosh. So would you stop with the girl bad drivers then? No, I mean, I'm a good driver. I just drive fast. Apparently, you're a good driver, Mr. Seventy Pickets. I drive fast. Let's rewind the tape where Wood said, I'm a terrible driver. I know, but I'm safe. I just drive fast. You need to go fast. 570. I don't know what I am. 194.9. Depends on the day, I guess. Are you that guy? That when things go wrong, and this may be a thing, where things go wrong at the place we try to arrange something and it just nothing that you plan turns out the way that it's supposed to. And how big of a fuss would you make out of it? 5701949. I'm not saying anything. I feel like everything always goes wrong when I try to plan something. Things work out better, you know, when I just go with it. But when I'm like all anal about it, trying to make sure everything's perfect. Disaster. That's why I'm worried about my wedding. Seriously, that's like the most stressful thing ever. We rented a giant party bus. And it was going to take everybody from downtown Dallas to my parents' lake house. And we were waiting on one dude, one guy to get on the bus. And I was rocking in my chair like, come on. And he was in traffic. He was lost. He didn't know where he was. I thought I was going to lose my mind. Did you check the clock like 87 times?

39:38Looking at my phone, looking out the window. I hate waiting for people. It was killing one dude holding the whole thing up. It's like, this is my wedding, man. Yeah, seriously. That would be me. Yeah, weird. The day of Wood's wedding, he almost set his suit on fire. Yes, I did. I did. Of course you did. I went upstairs to shower because we just went out there. Jamie and I were going to get ready separately. I had my suit in the plastic like sheath. Not the one from the dry cleaner, the one from like the store. Right. And there was a candle lit in the bathroom and I just kind of leaned my, I leaned my suit against the, like on the counter. And my uncle was like, hey dude, your suit's on fire. And I ran out. I was like, oh my God, oh my God. Like this melted plastic everywhere. Nothing got on my suit. Sweet uncle. Nothing got on my suit. Not to do anything. I was in the shower. Like running out. Would you mind dealing with it for a second? I don't. I don't think it was an omen, though. The burning suit. It was just a typical day in the life of what? Yeah, seriously. 100%. 100%. I saw the coolest show yesterday. I've never seen it before. It's called Bully Beatdown. Nice. Have you ever heard of it? No. I'm in, though. They basically take videotapes from people that say that they're being bullied.

40:55And then they go to the bully and they offer the bully $10,000 to get in the ring with a guy that's pretty good at mixed martial arts. Wow. In an octagon. Now, these guys that they find, like the dude I saw yesterday, he's like a pretty beefy dude. Right. Like the bully. He's a pretty beefy dude. And he said the guy that he had bullied. He bullied two guys. Why are people still bullying over the age of eight? Hey, listen. Of all kinds. Dude, I was. I was bullied. You were bullied, right? I was bullied. There's three dudes. They're on my list. And I still know their names. I know where they are. Wow. That freaked me out a little bit. They're going to get got one day. Dude, they made my... And of course, none of them would ever do it by themselves. It was always the three of them. Safety in numbers. Yeah. You're talking about like in high school or as an adult? I'm talking like... ninth and tenth grade. There were three dudes in my grade. I was friends with everybody, but this little group hated me. I don't know why. So this was, what, 20 years ago and they haven't gotten got yet? No, they're going to get got. You never forget. They're going to be walking out of the building one day and just... The idea of this is that they go, they find these bullies, right?

42:07And they offer the bully $10,000 to get in the ring with this MMA dude. And what they do is... Is this real? Yeah, dude. It was real. Like, I'm telling you, you're watching the guy getting punched in the face. Oh, man. Like, that's real. This is like every nerd's dream. Yeah. Yay! You know what they do? They put, like, headgear on the bully. But the MMA guy doesn't wear headgear. And just beats him. Oh, it's fan. Fantastic. And what they do is every time the bully taps out, they give $1,000. He loses $1,000. Hey, bully, if you can make it through this thing, you get $10,000, right? But if you tap out at any point, you lose $1,000, and it goes to the people that you bully. So this is like the ultimate vindication for anyone that's ever been bullied. Well, sure. You have to understand.

43:01I despise bullies. I do too, dude. I think bullies. Every time you say bully, it makes me laugh. Hey, bully. I despise bullies. I do. I do. I think bullies are filthy animals. Why are they called bullies? I don't know. Because they're like a bull. Because they're like a bull. They're bullish. They're bullish. They bull their way through life. So I hate bullies. So anyway, they take this guy and what he had done. was this bully had given a guy an atomic wedgie. He had to have surgery on his anus. Are you kidding me? I'm not kidding you. This is a lie. I'm telling you. Surgery? Nothing like that ever happened to me. Maybe like stitches, not surgery. That's what he had to have, stitches. How old is this guy? Yeah. The guy, the bully? No, the guy that got bullied. Oh, the guy that got bullied? I would say he's probably in his early 20s. And the guy that bullied him was also in his early 20s. What bully would agree to this? I guess for the money? For the money and the fact that they are pretty big dudes. And a lot of times bullies are tough guys. They really are tough guys. And so they get in the ring. And the guy actually looked pretty good against this not that great MMA guy. He actually didn't look that bad in a...

44:20You know, when they couldn't hit each other, when they were just kind of wrestling. Because the guy was an athlete. Right. The bully. Until he, you know, got in an arm bar and had to tap out, which you love watching. Amazing. It's great. Does the bully ever beat the MMA guy? I've only seen this one episode, but talked to a friend of mine about it. And he says that sometimes the bullies actually get over. Wow. You know, because they're big dudes. Maybe they get a chance to be an MMA guy after that or something. Yeah, I hope not. I hope that they go back to their trailer and, you know. The bully becomes a millionaire and then they fire. Now, what they do is they do play. What they do play up is the bully will be, you know, the producers told the bully to be a little extra like. Right. Really cheese up, you know, who you are. And so the guy would be like. I'm hot. I know it. Blah, blah. You know that. So it's like Jersey Shore mixed with. Kind of. Okay. Kind of. But what you do know is real. What you do know is real is when they're in the octagon because you see the guy getting punched in the face. Dynamite. Kicked in the abdomen. You know, I'm not. I'm sorry. Go ahead. No, I was just going to say, I don't know if this is a good lesson. It's like an eye for an eye and the whole world goes blind. I don't know. I'm not a big proponent of like violence and fighting. And that's why I've never really watched a lot of MMA. Yeah.

45:33But I think I'm kind of in on this. Oh, I love MMA. Because I like to see bullies getting the crap kicked out of them. You know what I really liked about it? At least the episode that I saw. When it was all over, the guy had been beaten, right? Good. He'd been beaten. And so the people that he bullied were right in front of him. And he says, and he kind of says it low, they actually have to put it on the screen in subtitles. Sorry, dude. But he's like, dude, I'm sorry for this stuff I've done to you, man. And they hugged. It was his brother. It was his stepbrother. Yeah, he got paid a $2,000 bonus to apologize. See, and that's when you shank him. No, no. That's when you just shank him real quick. You could tell, guys. It was genuine. No, you guys, you guys, you could tell. And then they're way out to dinner after the show. And it was like, they met family. When he gives me the hug is when I give him, oh, no, dude, it's cool. And I just shank him a few times in the back. You drop the shank and walk away. Oh, I totally thought. Things are never cool with a bully afterwards. Give him a little nuggie. Get it in there. I thought it was real. No, there's no way. It did. It looked like he learned a lesson. No, he didn't. He made money. He's not going to hurt anyone anymore. Well, after he got his butt beat, he was like, I'm really sorry, you know. I'm sorry. That's so cheesy. Mikey. Mikey and I have been bullied. That's why we're in on it. Yeah. Who hasn't been bullied, though?

46:55I guess everybody's been bullied, but if you've been bullied, can't you relate to, you know, that? I just think that it's to pick on somebody. Kill him with kindness. I think to pick on somebody that can't, like, especially, like, because my son has autism. If anybody ever hurt my son. Forget it. You know what I mean? I would. I would. I would die. I would kill him. I would lose it. Because my son has autism. If it's something that you can't help. You're a filthy animal. If you're making fun of somebody that they can't help it, you're a filthy animal. I'll never forget. I was at the eighth grade dance. Now, I only say that they're a filthy animal, by the way. I just want to point this out. I only say that they're a filthy animal because they're a filthy animal. They are filthy. Like three dudes standing around me. I was dancing with Wendy Gibbons to Stairway to Heaven. And they were like, just all pushed me. So finally, I just hit one of them. And then they just jumped on top of me. And they called the parents and that whole bit. But my life was a living hell after that. Oh, see, it was the opposite way. I was the guy most likely to snap. If they picked on me long enough, then you'd, yeah, you better kill me. And it was just, it was long and it didn't matter. Yeah, right? I could picture Jay after getting pushed around too long.

48:10Just snapping on the guy. Yep. My buddy, I had this little buddy who was getting picked on. The guy just kept going after him and telling his girlfriend was ugly. And I finally, we were sitting in like an assembly in the bleachers. I just turned around. I full on went into choke mode. I was on his chest. I was headed by the neck. After that, they did not mess with me. That a boy. I love it. That's like Ralphie in Christmas Story. That's exactly right. Is it just like a thing that all guys get in fights? Yes. Have you been in a fight, Mike? I got my butt kicked one time. Once. Once? That's it? That was it. I got my butt kicked once. Doesn't feel good, dude. No, it doesn't feel good. Doesn't feel good getting punched in the face. No, I've always wanted to just punch someone in the face. But that feels real good. You know, I've never been able to. I don't really want to now. I mean, maybe I do a little bit. But, like, girls don't. Oh, yes, they do. I was a bouncer at a bar. Now, see, here's the thing. I'm not, I don't advocate the violence. Yeah. You know, I don't advocate the violence. I don't advocate fighting with people. But what I do advocate is sticking up for the people that are. That need it. That need it. Yeah. I'm sticking up for those people. Me too. And if that takes violence, then okay. Hey, listen, I say if you're protecting your, I will teach Jake.

49:30And I'll teach any of my boys. I got three boys. You protect your brother. And yourself. I don't just mean Jake. I don't just mean Jake. I don't say, I'm not going to say to Luke and Ryan, who at least at this point seem very like typical kids, would never say, I'm not just saying with them. I'm saying with each other. Boys, you stick up for your brother. You always stick up for your brother. You defend your brother. That's almost something you don't even need to teach. It's just a reaction. If someone does something to one of your siblings. It's an extension of yourself. Like my brother would get teased, and I would just freak out. I would freak out on people. You can tease him, but no one else can. Yeah, you can, but nobody else can. But the only difference, I think, Woodsy, is that I'm not down with, hey, if you get teased, punch him. I'm not down. I can't go that way. I am. What if they punch you? You got to punch him back. You always fight back. You can defend yourself for sure. Don't throw the first punch. Is that your bit? Oh, no, no. Yeah, I don't know. Don't throw a first punch. But sometimes it's got to be done. What if they picked on Jake for a year and finally snapped and beat the crap out of somebody? Yeah, I don't think that I would never advocate him snapping and beating somebody. I would never advocate him. Jay's coming in. This means business. Get off.

50:56You're saying we got a break? Yeah. David Letterman did two of the most awkward minutes of television last night. Can't wait. Like, dude, I listened to it, and I'm like, I'll play it for you now. Mikey Show. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. To communicate the sheer speed of high-speed internet from AT&T, we decided to use the actors who usually read the legal disclaimers at the end of commercials for the whole commercial. Hey, Lisa, check this out. What is it, Dad? I'm doing my homework. I've got lots of homework. But look at all these cool videos I downloaded on the computer. They downloaded so fast. Dad, we have high-speed internet from AT&T. That makes everything fast. What did you download? Watch this. That is lame. What about this one? That is lame. This one. That is lame. Come on, that kid just got hit in the face with a dodgeball. Here, watch it again. We should use high-speed internet from AT&T to download music. How much longer are you going to hog the computer? For a limited time, see store for details. Like I haven't heard that before. Gets me every time.

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53:18try out plus a free refining face mask call toll free now 1-800-244-1946 that's 1-800-244-1946 bevmo presents the five cent sale word wow as in wow buy one bottle of wine and get the second for just five cents or wow look how many great wines there are to choose from and wow i'm coming back for more that's our favorite bevmo's five cent sale is on choose for more than 200 great wines like Mezza Corona Pinot Grigio, Irony Pinot Noir, and Louis Martini Chardonnay. Club Bev members, buy one bottle, get the second for just five cents. Wow Mo and Save Mo at BevMo. Snowboard causing some problems this morning. This report is brought to you by redplum.com. Discover a great place to find printable coupons, coupon codes, and saving tips online. Redplum.com. You'll save on your favorites for groceries, fashion, local dining, and a whole lot more. Visit redplum.com today. The 163 southbound after Balboa Avenue looks like a snowboard between the number three and four lanes. They do have a traffic break that's been requested to clear it. Also, Sports Arena Boulevard, the ramp to the eight, an accident on the right shoulder, two-car accident. Their airbags got deployed. Somebody's still stuck.

54:27their car and ambulances responding and the fire department they're on the scene this report brought to you by centrum silver centrum silver age-adjusted multivitamins they've got key antioxidants and other nutrients that help protect the health of your heart your eyes and bones as you age i'm stacy cohen fm 94.9 kbzt san diego lincoln financial media station the new home of the mikey show fm 94.9 jay's freaking out because he says we lost a good call what was it Yeah, Gary called in, and he said, you know, how can you be so behind this sport when these guys are just big bullies? That's all they are. They got all their training, they grew up beating up kids, and now they've found a way to do it professionally. Good point. Wait a minute. So we're saying that across the board, that's the deal? That's tough to generalize, I would imagine. That's what he said. And I was like, hmm, okay, at least let Mikey explain it. Yeah, I mean, my feeling on that is that...

56:11I think that any sport in the world, you're going to find that that may be the case. And you're going to find that maybe that isn't the case. Football players, I'm sure, were some typical to bully people. Yeah. I mean, I know a couple of MMA guys that are good people. They're just good men. Brandon Vera is a good dude. Diego Sanchez, good dude. Christian guy, believer, good dude. And I don't mean that he's good because he's a Christian. I'm just saying I know the guy. He's a nice guy. That's the thing. I mean, any sport in the world, you're going to find that there are people that are, you know, that were raised and some people are bullies and some people aren't. And that's like saying, well, how can you support MMA if those dudes grew up either as bullies or, you know, in some kind of wacky lifestyle? You've got to ask yourself, you mean unlike things that are legitimate like boxing? Because Mike Tyson, I'm sure, grew up in a completely healthy and normal. I'm sure he never bullied anybody. Yeah. Or a normal lifestyle. Football, baseball. There are bullies in all walks of life. For sure. The reason that I'm down with MMA is MMA is a sanctioned event with rules.

57:36It's not somebody jumping a guy, dragging him into an octagon and beating him senseless. But I love two guys that have been trained to be the best that they can be at a particular area in martial arts, beating each other to a pulp. I love it. I love it. If it's a skill, they've learned how to do it. They know what they're doing. You know what I mean? It isn't like somebody's jumping somebody in an alley. Kid's got a pretty weak stomach, though. You do? Yeah. I'm all about sparring for sport, but I just can't deal with the blood that gets splattered. And sometimes there is some blood. My wife loves UFC. It shocks me. She loves the UFC. In fact, two UFC events ago, she said to me, are we getting the fight Saturday night? And she had to remind me. She had to remind me, and I was like, oh, yeah. But I love it. Woodsy, not so much. He's got a little bit of a weak stomach when it comes to all the blood. Kind of a Sally. M1 Chunk. What's up, guys? What's going on? Hi. Hey, yeah, I was calling in about the Bully Beatdown show. Yeah. Yeah, actually, the host of the show, Mayhem, he was actually bullied in school. That's why he became an MMA fighter. Nice. Really? Yeah. Yeah.

59:05Mayhem, I interviewed Mayhem in Las Vegas when I was there for one of their events, one of the MMA events, UFC event. And I think now that you're saying I remember that. Mayhem was bullied as he was growing up. Yeah. So he wasn't a bully. He was bullied. And he's actually the host of the show. The dude I interviewed, he's actually the host of this show. Check him out. It's pretty good. Hey, thanks, dude. I appreciate the call. M1 Harold is on the line. What's up? How's it going, guys? What's up, man? Hi. You know, I know a lot of tough, and I would say some of the toughest guys out there really are the most laid-back guys because they really don't have much to prove, you know? Yeah. I mean, they know they're tough, so why go around and bully on people? Yeah, I mean, Harold is a professional arm wrestler. Right, Harold? Yeah, yeah. I know a lot of tough guys. I've found that the people that are going around bullying people and they have to pump up their attitude to make up for the fact that they really ain't that tough. If you stood up to a bully, you'll find out they really ain't that tough. Yeah, I believe that. Thanks for the call, dude. I appreciate it. So the couple of minutes of David Letterman that was really, really strange. Can't wait. From last night's David Letterman.

1:00:30Take a listen. Tell me what you think. I think everybody, when we go through a punishing winter like we've gone through, people are excited now to have the Winter Olympics on TV. Something great to watch. Great kids in great competition. And it got off to a... A brutal start. First of all, they had the practice for that luge thing. And that poor kid, 21 years old, from Georgia. One of, not the state of Georgia, but the country of Georgia. Former Soviet Socialist Republic. So, one of 10 athletes. Oh, gosh. That wasn't awkward, by the way, right? I mean, you couldn't remember. I couldn't remember. That's so strange. It's like George Bush. And they put him on the luge thing there in Canada, and he flies off the track and slams into those steel girders. It was just horrifying. Just a kid, and they're a great, tremendous pride. And then here's the aftermath. The Canadians and the luge people say, oh, the kid made a mistake. Say it. Kid made a mistake. Why? I'm exhausted listening to him. Yeah, say it, dude. Like, where are you taking us? He's taking you somewhere, and you're like,

1:01:44Because it's a, you know, late night. But is this any different than how he normally talks? He seems frazzled. He seems way frazzled than usual, but way more frazzled. A little frazzled, and plus, I'm used to the yuck yucks with Letterman. Right. Yeah. So, you know. Yuck, yuck, yuck. But it's a shame on you thing is what's common, which just tripped me out because I'm like, Dave, people are just barely starting to get over the whole cheating thing, bro. Mm-hmm. But there's a shame on you, thank you. That's why he's dead. Well, you know, first of all, you ought to be able to make a mistake. These are the Olympic Games. You ought to be able to make a mistake in a game and not lose your life. Yeah. And I just wonder if it had anything to do with those exposed steel girders. That the kid slammed into. So don't blame the kid for God's sakes. He was there representing his country. And he said to his dad, he said, I think something's haywire here. I'm a little frightened of this track. But they didn't do anything about it ahead of time. But for them to say it's because he made a mistake, well, that just stinks. Because if the kid had made a mistake and that was the end of it, then they wouldn't have repaired the track and covered up the girders and started from the women's starting point. They moved the start.

1:02:56This is like two minutes. Wow. I absolutely agree with him. I do too. No, no, no. I do too. I'm just thinking if I'm an audience member, right? Yeah. I'm like, I'm probably like, oh my goodness. You're looking at your shoes. Yeah, you're looking at the person next. Checking your text messages. Well, I think, I mean, in his defense, I think that everyone is just saying, you know, he made a mistake. The kid made a mistake. The kid made a mistake. And this is probably something that hit home with Letterman. And he's like. Dude, he didn't. This is a game. This is supposed to be a game. See, I don't watch Letterman enough to know that maybe sometimes he does this. You're in bed five hours before Letterman starts. Yeah, maybe sometimes he does this when he feels really passionate about something. But I thought he did like a comedy thing. Well, he's a public figure. He's using this as a forum to stick up for the guy. Now, I think that that's cool and everything. The thing that made me uncomfortable was it sounds like it followed the whole, like, keyboard, you know, having a great, you know, like having a great time. But let's keep listening. Like 600 feet down the track. And you're telling me that's because the kid made a mistake? Well, if that was consistent, the kid made a mistake, they would start where they normally would start, and they wouldn't cover up the exposed steel girders. You see what it is? It's hypocrisy, ladies and gentlemen.

1:04:21Thank you. Sienna, you're down, though, right? You know, I think he sounded a little frazzled in the beginning, and it definitely sounded weird. But the more he started talking, I absolutely agree with what he's saying. And I think that someone needed to voice that these people at the Olympics need to stop blaming the kid for making a mistake and other Olympians saying that he's inexperienced. Like, he's there for a reason. It wasn't safe. You don't get there being a novice. Yeah, exactly. It's not like I tried to do the luge. Right. You know? Well, I... Just imagine that. Oh, boy. I think what tripped me out is that it seems like a strange forum, David Letterman. It did to me because I thought that David Letterman was supposed to be like a, you know what I mean? Something must have happened on the break or something. It sounded like he was frazzled in the beginning coming off of something that was said. Something must have been said. Or maybe he's on CBS, the Olympics on NBC.

1:05:21I don't know. Is that the truth? I might have just made that up. No, that's right. That is the truth. And that actually makes sense. I don't know. Like if something like was said that we're not hearing before that happened, that might make more sense because there's context to it. But just hearing that, I was like, that's so strange to do two minutes on a kind of random thing. Yeah. Usually he would. approach the story, because it's a big thing, really quickly, and then have some sort of a joke coming out of it, and then move on. But you can't joke about that. Well, no, but he would come up with something clever and move on. Yeah. So, it was, struck me as so weird. Yeah. I'm glad he said something, though. You are? Mm-hmm. I think, I mean, every time I hear someone call the kid that died inexperienced, it just, it kills me. Oh, yeah. It's ridiculous. Yeah, I mean, I agree with the sentiment. There's no doubt about it. I agree with the sentiment. I thought that David, I think I would have agreed with the sentiment more or nothing would have changed how much I agree with the sentiment. It would have made more sense to me if it were like an editorial on CNN. Right. It was strange that it was coming from. But more people are going to hear it coming from Letterman. I think Lauren's right. I think he was just so caught up that it was just so heartfelt that he was just like, hey, I got to get this out. It wasn't a smooth, normally polished show. It was just like, bam, here it is. Yeah. Maybe he just decided to add it to the show last minute. A little ad lib.

1:06:43Yeah, that doesn't sound planned, right? No. Like it just kind of came out? Like I said, maybe something came up and he was like, and they were like, we're on in 10, Dave. And he was like, well, I'll save it for when the camera comes on or something. Yeah, it could have been. Can you guys play a little Name That TV theme song right now? Of course. Your brain's in work and order for this. Sienna, I think you may do okay with this one. Really? Yeah. Okay. I think you may do okay with this one. I hate losing to Woods, you know that. Call us right now. So give me the title now? 570-570-1949. And what you're going to do is you're going to pick a horse. You're going to pick Woods, Lauren. That was Jay. Or Sienna. That was really good. Woods, Lauren, or Sienna. Hey, what do we have as a prize, Jay? What do we got? We have Flight of the Conchords Season 2 DVD. Right on. All right. So if you want Flight of the Conchords Season 2 DVD, call us right now. 570-1949. Now, TV theme songs. And you're picking either Woods, Lauren, or Sienna. Now, Lauren actually does know some TV because she watches that, you know. Hulu Hoop. BZoo.com or what is it? Hulu. What is it?

1:08:04Hulu. Hulu.com. It just depends on where these, because I used to watch, I mean, I was babysat by TV, so I might know the old ones. There you go. Is that a dig at your parents? No. There's five kids in my family. You can't watch all of them. 570-1949. So the TV did a little work. Same thing with me. So if it's 70 shows, trust me, I would know it. But some of these 80s, 90s, I don't know. We'll see. We'll see how you do. 5701949. Let's see. M1 Katie. Hello. Who would you like? I would like Sienna. Yes, Katie. I'm feeling good this morning. It's okay. There you go. There you go. Hang in the line, okay? Katie. Okay, awesome. Let's see. This is M1 Sharia. Is it M1 Sharia? Do I have that right? I think I do. M1 Sharia. Are you there? Yeah. Who would you like? Lauren. Yes. Get it, dude. Last pick. Woodsy. Get over it. Woodsy is taken last by M1 Harold. Wow. Yes. Hang on, Harold. Consider yourself a winner, pal. Hey, I can't be last every time. Fair enough. Here's how it works. I am going to start playing the theme song as soon as you know it. Me too. I'm shaking. As soon as you know it, you say your name. You either say Woods, Lauren, or Sienna. Here we go. Cosby Show? You got it, Sienna.

1:09:43Well done. That must be the original Cosby show. It is. You got it. They changed it. Very nice. That's right. I just saw him dancing. You ready? Lauren. Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. You got it. Nice. Woodsy has not shot one yet. There's only been two. You ready? Yeah. Lauren. Sopranos. It is. No, it's not. It goes on to that. That is the original. No, it is. You watch. Watch, Woodsy. I know what you're thinking. Listen. It is. I watched Sopranos last night. Lennon Cohen. Lennon Cohen. I'm telling you. I never watched it. Oh, see? See? That's all I would have needed. See? Lauren is dancing. I'm seeing a whole new side of her. That's it, dude. She got it. See, I'm not mad at all if she gets ahead. It's only of Woodsy. Yeah, only of I will. And Woodsy, I was...

1:10:48positive you would get. That's my favorite show. That's why I'm so glad I beat it. You ready? My favorite show. You ready? I have no chance now. Lauren. Oh. Oh my gosh. She's so happy. She's got a smile on her face. Lauren has three. I have one. Woods is zero. Ready? Yeah. Sienna. I'm totally going to guess and say Survivor. You got it. I've never even seen Survivor. It just sounded like a survivor. Here we go. Lauren. You got it. The competition is between basically Lauren and Sienna. Lauren's winning. Yeah, I read books. How dare you? How dare you? Here we go. You got it, buddy. So now Woods is in the game. At least I didn't get shut out. We have...

1:11:58We got six more. What's the score? Lauren has four. I have two. Woods has one. Sienna. I think I heard Sienna first. Home improvement. That is correct. Good Lord. Good Sienna. Here we go. Woods. Sienna. Woods. Laverne and Shirley. That's right. Woods. This is so close. Lauren has four. I have three. Woods has two. As long as I beat Sienna. Here we go. Don't blow. Are y'all ready, kids? Sienna. Oh, no. Bunch. Bye. No, I don't watch cartoons, dude. That is correct. Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SpongeBob SquarePants. You know that too long. I've never seen it. SpongeBob is awesome. I've never seen it in my life. I've never seen it in my life. I'm 34. It's hilarious. I'm 34. I will watch it if it's on. Yeah. And Todd's daughter's not there. I still like it. Here we go. What? Oh. Lauren. Lauren got a second. Oh, yeah. That is correct. I'm thinking Warner Brothers. He's so happy. Yeah, that means he loses a point. Yeah, I didn't. He loses a point. We have two more. I'm out. Sorry, Harold. It's between Lauren and Sierra. What's the score? Lauren has five. I have four. Woods has one. Wow. Here we go. Sweet like of Zach and Cody. That is correct. I've never heard of it in my life. Disney Channel. Disney Channel. There's no way that Lauren... What are you, six? It's with the twins? Or no.

1:13:31We're tied right now. You're tied? This is a game deal breaker. I'm going to get it. Here we go. Just to be a jerk. I dropped my cap. Lauren, Lauren, Lauren. Sienna. Oh, my God. What is it? Oh, my God. I'm panicking. Wait. You got it. What is it? I didn't give up. You have to give an answer. You didn't give an answer. I did. Got to give an answer. I said, oh, I'm panicking, and then I was going to say it. Sorry. Whatever. P1 or M1 Sharia, are you there? Yeah. Lauren, just one you. Sorry, Katie. Awesome. Harold, I just soiled myself, dude. Sorry. That was close. It was the most impressive showing that you've had yet, Lauren. No question. Yeah, for sure. For someone who doesn't even have a TV. I know. That was good. How crazy. The older stuff. No TV. No cable. I think that's a lie. No, nothing. She says she doesn't. She doesn't have it.

1:14:37We usually are picking a movie today that we're going to go see tomorrow as a show. But we're having to do it today. The reason that we had a pick yesterday. The reason we're going to see the movie today. We're going to see the movie Valentine's Day. Sienna's pick, right, Sienna? You know it. That's right. I'm going to kick you right in the groin. Here's a clip from the movie Valentine's Day. Take a listen. What does Valentine's Day mean to you? It gives me acid reflux. That's what it means to me. I mean, we spend a lot of money. Nobody cares. It's not even a real holiday. We don't take the day off. Come on. That's what I'm talking about. And we're coming back in five, four. I'm a player. But I shut down my player-ness from New Year's to St. Paddy's Day just so I can avoid this day. You guys are excited. That was Jamie Foxx. Sounds amazing.

1:15:40We're seeing it today. I'm sorry we're not going to go see Michael Cera speaking way too intelligently. So am I. Julia Roberts, we announced yesterday, made what? Like a six-minute appearance. Three million bucks. Three million dollars for a six-minute... Here she is talking about her character in the movie. One of the things that I like about this part is... Is making $80 million. Working for five minutes. Every second. 500,000 a minute. Is that there's a little... mystery about her very little mystery because she's not in the movie for long i like where her story ends up i think it's sweet and it's truthful and so when we meet her as a passenger on this plane she's a soldier in iraq and she's going home on valentine's day three million dollars and her as a soldier is really believable too I'm not buying that. It's like putting Justin Timberlake as the president of the United States. Believe that. I don't believe it. So anyway, that's what we're going to go see today. And we'll tell you all about it tomorrow. And speaking of Valentine's Day, this I did think was pretty funny from Letterman.

1:16:52From last night. I think the most awkward part of Valentine's Day for me is, you know, you go to lunch, you go to dinner, you go to breakfast and brunch. And I think the most awkward part is, you know, dividing up the check. Now, let's see. You had the veal Parmesan. Okay. How many drinks did you have? You had a diet Sprite? All right. I love that. Jay just sent me an instant message that says that we have Jen. Do you know yesterday we talked to Tony, the guy that said that we... He loves you and she didn't say it back? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No way. I'm so nervous right now. She's on the line right now? We're going to have him, right? You got it though, right? I got her phone number. And she said she'll do it? I haven't talked to her yet. Oh, okay. Tony gave it to me finally. That's fantastic. We're going to call as many times as we need to. Woods just stood up in excitement. I'm nervous.

1:17:50That's fantastic. That's fantastic. So we're going to call her and because, yeah. Now, if you didn't hear it yesterday, Tony said to Jen on Valentine's Day that he loved her and she said thanks. And so then he freaked out and broke up with her. And then he's texted her five times. She won't. She hasn't texted back. Poor guy. It's happened to me and Mike several times. Yeah, several times. Several times. But yesterday, that was a deal, is that we were going to have Jay working on it to try to get Tony to let us call her. Get it in, Jay. Jay worked it out, right? Yeah, I did it. So we get to call her. Get her done. It's fantastic. Woods, the only thing is you have to behave. Oh, Woodsie. What? Yeah. The guy was like, you freak him out. Yeah. He freaks me out. I'm nervous. Git. What would I do? Something weird. Git. Something weird. What am I going to do? Hit on her? Say... See, you already know what you might do. What does she look like? What's that guy crying about, dude? I can't wait. Sienna. Yes. You're in charge of Woods. Yeah. I'll take care of that guy. He doesn't like to be told what to do. Oh, Sean Penn was on Larry King talking about Haiti and sounded like his usual upbeat, happy self. So we'll have a clip of that and we'll do that. What is with him? I love him. And we'll see what the deal is with Tony.

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1:22:47Good morning. This report brought to you by Luden's Throat Drops. Remember the great taste and soothing relief of Luden's Throat Drops. You should. Well, for everyday throat irritation, there's still nothing better. Luden's, it still works wonders. On the 15 southbound coming through Escondido before Center City Parkway, multi-vehicle accident. We've got three cars, two pickup trucks. They're over on that right shoulder. Another car could be in the middle of lanes. Also, the five northbound before the truck scale, San Clemente Checkpoint. We've got a car that stalled in the number three lane. They're just waiting on a tow truck. This report brought to you by Chapstick. For lips that look and feel healthy, never let your lips go naked. Always wear chapstick. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. Toadies, right? Yes, Dallas, Texas, brother. As you know, Sean Penn is a bit of an activist. Just a little bit. Yeah, he is. And he was on Larry King last night talking about Haiti and everything that's happening there. So when you focus on something like that, as politically involved as you are, and as interested as you are in your country and other things, you tune that out? In other words, this has so overwhelmed you that you haven't thought about other things going on. By the way, you were Spatoli, right? Didn't you play Spatoli? I know that, dude. If we do this, and we succeed in helping with the other countries involved, and I'll include countries like Venezuela, Cuba, these controversial countries, it's just, at this point, it's all so stupid.

1:25:10Politics are so stupid in this situation. There's no place for it. If we do this, it will affect our character forever and it will build us into a better country and it will build our relationships with other countries better. You know, there is so much money being raised for Haiti that it may actually end up in the end being good for that country. And it's so much money's been put together that when they rebuild it, it'll be better. Yeah. You know what I mean? They turn a tragedy into something really beautiful. So what was he saying? I couldn't really get the gist of what he was saying. He was saying it was a good thing that we were helping them? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. He didn't want the government involved or he didn't want politics? Oh, he just thinks that politics right now even being discussed is stupid. Right. Which, yeah, I'm down with that. Yeah. I think so, too. I mean, it's not about that. He's brilliant, dude. It's not about politics. I don't know that I would necessarily.

1:26:10characterize Sean Penn as brilliant, but to each their own. His work is brilliant. Brilliant. You thought the movie Into the Wild was brilliant? Absolutely. He was in Into the Wild? He directed it. But Mystic River, Milk, genius. I thought that the book was really great. Dead Man Walking. I mean, the dude is a sick actor. He didn't direct Dead Man Walking. No, but he was in it. He starred in it. He was really good in that. He's sick. He's a great actor. That's what I'm saying. His work is phenomenal. Oh, I got you, got you, got you. Yeah, yeah, I agree. He's a brilliant actor. I think so, too. I mean, to go from Spicoli to playing that. No doubt. That is brilliant. How brilliant was Spicoli? Great. He's fantastic. I know that dude. I know that dude. Hey, Mr. Han, wouldn't you consider it our time? Certainly there's nothing wrong with a little feast on our time. Feast on our time. Nobody's done that better. Nobody. Nobody's done that. He was in I Am Sam, right? Oh, yeah. He won an Oscar for that. He won an Oscar. Good dude's a beast. What's so weird is that he totally convinced the world that he was Jeff Spicoli. Yes. He was Spicoli. And he was the furthest, in real life, the furthest thing from Jeff Spicoli. Do you know that, Sienna? That movie? Of course. Fast Times the Ridge Run High. Love it. Nice girl. Love it. It's brilliant. Okay, so where Jay is working on getting Tony, and he's going to get Jen on the line, too.

1:27:38I just won't say anything. Are you talking to her, Mike? Am I talking to who? Jen? Yes. Okay. I will. I'll talk to her. I'll try to help mend a bridge. Me too. Woodsy. Woods. Get a piece of duct tape. It's a bridge builder. You got to mind your pints and quarts. Right? Look at Sienna knows it. Yes, he does. Well, here's the thing. Tony said that he told Jen he loved her, and she said thanks. Very polite. It's weak. Very polite. Very polite. Why couldn't she just say, you know... I'm not ready to say that back. Say, hey, I love you, too. And cross your fingers. You know, it's been six months. I think I know that I'm falling in love with you. I just am not quite ready to say it. Give me a little bit more time, and I'm pretty sure I'll get there. Maybe she just panicked. Could you? You could not handle that. You'd have thrown up in your hands. Dude, I would handle... That's the best. I'd handle that way more than I'd handle thanks. Yeah. Well, maybe she just panicked. I mean, she said thanks, but maybe inside she was like, gosh, I do too, or I just, I don't know if I'm ready for this. If you love him and a guy says it first, you're going to say it back. Hey, how about this, though, Lauren? If she panicked, wouldn't she say to him later, like, hey, listen.

1:29:05I freaked out a little bit. Well, not everybody is as open as you are with your feelings. And maybe she was just a little bit, you know. Like it's about emotional. They're emotional. Especially if they're young. Like an open book. What if I just want to say it really bad? What if I'm dating LaShonda and I have really strong feelings about her? LaFonda. LaFonda, that's what... Yeah, LaFonda. Just say it. I'm just dating her and I really like her and things are really working out really well this time. Listen, she didn't say it back and she said thanks and she really did feel it. Say later to him. Text the guy back. Text him back. Five times. Silence is just death. It's death. It's death. She's already weirded out and now she's doubly weirded out. I think Tony's reconsidering because Jay's looking like he's having a hard time with Tony. He might be reconsidering the whole thing. I can't get either one of them to pick up. Perfect. Awesome.

1:30:07Changed his mind. No. She probably changed her mind, too. We have her phone number. Just keep calling. A girl like that? We've all been in that situation. Well, you girls have been in that situation. I mean, certainly Lauren has what with not buying a Valentine's gift for her boyfriend. And that one time she was on a date and the guy wanted to have a little smooch. And she said no and shook his hand. Hey, I'm not giving out kisses for free. That's right. Boy, I do. Handshakes. Handshakes. You can have all you want. Woodsy's giving out kisses for free. Whatever. Doesn't matter, right? Just a lot of subpar girls in my day. The station's going to get swarmed with girls now. He's a married man now. He's a married man. I'm talking about years ago. Well, you said that you wouldn't kiss a chubby girl that you went on a date with. I never said that. I've kissed plenty of chubby girls in my day, pal. That's the deal. Your mom walked in.

1:31:09It's a great one. Mark that. Yeah, mark that. Your mom walked in one time and saved you from... Going any further. Going any further. Going any further. You said it could have gone wrong. It could have gone way wrong. Oh, man. Kiss is not that big of a deal. I know. This is from the guy that had the desk comment. That wasn't my story. It was just an observation. Don't bring it up. It's still funny. It's not funny. Poor desk. It's so funny. The girl was overweight and couldn't fit in a desk and they nicknamed her desk. Because they had to bring a table into every... She couldn't fit. Yeah. She couldn't fit in a regular sized desk. So cool. So they had to put a table into all of her classes for her to sit behind. And of course, kids being cramped. And you're being inappropriate. They nicknamed her desk. Which is just awful. Who would have thought?

1:32:07It was like, you know, chubby or like table. You know, something heffa. Not desk. Not desk. Terrible. Desk. My poor buddy, my best friend doesn't sit right next to her for graduation. Oh, your poor buddy. He had to lean up the whole time. Couldn't even lean back in his chair. Stop. He was over-exaggerating. She was like Kevin Smith. Oh, hi. You're so teeny. All I heard growing up. It was. Oh, hi. You're so teeny. 570-1949. Dad's looking like Tony. Don't want to do it now. Tony, come on, man. Come on, bro. Quit crying, dude. Quit your... Oh, that's going to really encourage him. We'll fix it. We can fix it. I really think that we can. Can we? Yeah. No. Speaking of things like weight.

1:33:11There's a show on TV called Celebrity Fit Club. You guys know about this show? Oh, yeah. Celebrity Fit Club? Nope. Screech was on it. You try to lose weight. It's like the F-listers. Yeah. And Bobby Brown didn't really know about alcohol and how that can actually make you fat. And it can't. What kind of eating did you do this week? I did slip up and eat some fish. Oh, really? You slipped up and ate some fish? That's like the healthiest thing you could eat. That's a good thing. Yeah. Yeah. I slipped. Okay, I had some carrots. Some carrots and some celery and some almonds, and I messed up. I had a handful of alfalfa sprouts. I know I've gained eight pounds this week, but I messed up. I'm sorry. I had a can of raw tuna. A fish is not going to stop you from losing three pounds. I didn't lose it. What were you drinking? Water. No beers. I might have had two beers. Two. It's always the message. How many beers do you have tonight, son? Yeah. Whenever a cop pulls somebody over. Two beers. Two. How many beers do you have? Two. Because who would ever just have one? It's automatic. Two beers. And three would be too many. Yeah, three is too many. Two, sir. It's like the cop can mouth it with you. Two? Okay. Okay. See, guys, this is how it works. There's a magnification factor. I had two or three beers. You really probably had four or five beers. That is 100% correct. Yeah, exactly.

1:34:36That's just how it works, you know? Did you have anything to drink today? I had a couple of beers and I had a glass of... A couple. Six. Music is so dramatic. I know. I had a couple of beers. You know, vodka. Well, isn't that a bit much for a weight loss? Wait a minute. A glass of vodka. Where'd that come from? What's the problem? I had a glass of vodka. Is there something wrong with a glass of vodka? What's the problem? A man can't have a glass of vodka and a couple of beers? No. My limits are ridiculous as far as alcohol is concerned. I can drink. This isn't about your tolerance level, Bobby. We're not really concerned about how well you play ping pong after having a few shots. We're concerned about the six pounds of weight you put on this last week. From the nine or ten beers you had. For breakfast. For breakfast. And the vodka. What about you not hitting your target? But that had nothing to do with drinking. It has everything to do with drinking. I mean, alcohol is just full of empty calories. Tonight alone. Empty calories. What does that mean? It's. Nobody knows. No substance. Like you're. Oh. Oh. We got. Who do we have? Who do we have, Jay? We have gin.

1:35:54Online, and we have Tony online. Oh, really? I've got to go. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm leaving, I'm leaving, I'm leaving. Come here, Jay, come here and teach me and show me and teach me. See, I thought it was just going to be one of them now. So, is this, which, that's Tony? That's Tony. That's Tony. Yep, so you hit it. Tony, are you there? Hey. How you doing? I'm a little nervous. Oh, yeah. Well, I'm glad that Jay was able to get you to come on because it sounded like you didn't want to, but we got you. No, I really didn't. And to be honest with you, I'm a little apprehensive. Dude, we got you. Can she? Yeah, she can hear you. Yeah, well, we're going to get her right now. Are you ready? So I'm going to patch in together. Let's see. Jen, are you there? Yeah, I'm here. Jen, we have Tony on the line, who you have not spoken to since Valentine's Day. Yeah. I can't believe that.

1:36:54He's having a radio station call me. He feels bad. Listen, Jen, I swear I didn't want to do it, but they really coaxed me into it. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Hang on. You're the one that called us. Hang on, Tony. Coaxing is, that's a whole different thing. And by the way, I want to say, because Jay said, just wrote me a note that Jen said that she's on the five at a place where she loses signal. So hopefully she doesn't lose signal. But I don't know that. You were coaxed, Tony. We asked you. You said yes. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. When you originally asked me, what did I say? You said no. You said no. Yes, in all fairness, we put a .357 Magnum to your head, in fairness, and we said either you allow it or else. Okay, that's fair. That is fair. Thank you. So you said that you would give this a shot.

1:37:55I think that we may be able to help you, though, Tony. Okay. Jen? Yeah? The reason that Tony called us, and I think that this may mean something to you as a woman. The reason that he called us is because he's crazy about you. He's absolutely crazy. I can figure that out. I mean, the amount of text messages and messages that I have received over the last couple days. I mean, blow. I was planning on calling you today. I just, I mean. I don't know why you're having a radio station call me about some big deal about something that is probably not even a big deal at all. Jen, I can help. I can help. I'll tell you why. Because us guys, we're not as savvy as you ladies. No. We are really not. And what I mean by that is that we mess up and what happens is it's a snowball effect.

1:38:51We make one mess up, which turns into a bigger mess up and a bigger mess up. Now, in this case, what it looked like was, I love you. You said thanks. Then he overreacted, broke up with you. That's a little bit of a snowball. Then later on that night, decided to text you. That was a snowman. That was a snowman. And then he continued to text you, which became a snow Tyrannosaurus Rex. Because he continued to text you. But you said that you were going to call him today? Yeah, I was planning on calling him today. I just needed a couple days to think about everything. It was just really surprising. I mean, we were at this restaurant, crowded, you know, lots of people around, and he says this, and I was just really surprised, and I just needed some time to, you know, gather myself, and I was planning on calling him today after work, but, you know, it just... It didn't happen that way. But you've been dating for six months, right? Yeah. I mean, usually that's about the time it comes out, if not a little sooner, depending on the couple. I mean, I just, from his point of view, he was probably...

1:40:04shocked that you didn't say anything back and for you to say you were surprised i mean you had to know it was coming at some point and you you know you've continued the relationship for this long you must have some feelings for him it's not like he said it after three weeks oh yeah but it's like mikey and i yeah i really really like tony i mean i like him a lot no i think this guy is a great guy yeah But he also, I think he should know me a little bit well enough to know that I'm not big on, like, being out in the public like that. When he said that, I was just like, you know, and I felt like really on the spot. And I'm just not a very, like, public display sort of individual. So that was what really took me back. It's not that I don't have feelings for him. I do. I like him a lot. I think Tony is fantastic. Lauren has a question. So was it more about being in public that you didn't like, or are you still just, like, you think it's moving too fast? It's not about moving too fast. I mean, I don't want to get into this whole long, drawn-out conversation on the radio, no offense, because that's kind of public, just like the restaurant was. But, I mean, I do really like Tony, and I'd rather have it be a discussion with the two of us.

1:41:22you know, and have him come over and we can talk about this. And I mean, I'm kind of like, he knows me. I mean, we've been dating for six months. He knows that, you know, this sort of like spring something on me really fast thing was probably not the best way to go about something. That doesn't mean I don't have any feelings for him. I want him to, I'd love for him to come over like tonight and we can talk about it. And maybe he can apologize for sort of like freaking out. over texting and you know just not even having any faith in me you know and then breaking up with me you know like hi i mean at least i can take a day or two to think about stuff can't i or a day i mean what do you mean two day here's the here's the deal here's the deal and i'm going to give it to you from a man's perspective when we are in love with somebody we will do crazy crazy things and it's it comes from it comes from a good place But we just don't know how to do it. We just don't know how to do it. We over text. We call too much. We say mean things and we don't mean them. When a man is truly in love with somebody, all bets are off. Tony right now feels like there's a cantaloupe in his stomach. Yeah, for sure. But it takes a lot to tell someone you love them. And I bet that, you know.

1:42:42He said that he wasn't planning it, but obviously he's been feeling it for a while for it to just come out and then to get a response like thank you. You can't expect somebody to say something that they don't feel. Exactly. Well, no, I understand. So I can't expect Jen to necessarily say it back. But what I said before is it maybe would have been cool to say, hey, I'm not ready to say that yet. But the thanks, it's a little rough. Well, I mean, you know, having said that, you know, I was really put on the spot out of nowhere. Yep. I get it. Sure. You know, so just as much as... It was Valentine's Day. It's not that out of nowhere. Six months of dating. It is out of no way. We weren't sitting there talking about our relationship. We weren't talking about the two. It just came out out of no way. I mean, I'm sorry if you guys don't agree with me, but that's not... I do, Jen. I can agree with you, definitely. I agree with you. But I also... It doesn't mean I don't feel it, or I don't feel anything. But I want to talk to him about this. I don't want this to be this thing on the radio. I mean... Too late. You know, I was planning on calling him today. It's not like I wasn't going to get back to him. I just needed a day to sort of, you know, complete myself.

1:43:48Yes. Do you want me to come over tonight? Yeah, I do. Yes. Nice. I can't wait. I will be there. Nice. Very good. I think that Tony's intentions were in the right place the entire time. He obviously feels really bad. He obviously really cares about you. I do not think he is crazy at all. You may be thinking that, but because he's able to say, I can't believe I did those things. A crazy person would not. know the mistakes they were making they think what's wrong with that you know can i ask uh can i ask a question just uh purely from a wow i'd really like to use this as a chance to do some research and for the guys that are listening jen you're willing to let him come over tonight and talk to you reasonably and all that stuff okay and so here's so here's my question if you if you've gone that far in your thinking and in your heart, and you're willing to do that. You couldn't respond to one text message. Not one of those text messages. Just say, hey, give me a couple of days. I'll be right with you. It's about punishment. Oh, it's punishment. It's punishment because he did. He messed up. He broke up with her the night he dropped her off. And I just wonder, you know, why not respond to one? And maybe I'm projecting a bit here. Does it sound like maybe I've been through it? Yeah.

1:45:10You know, Jen, not one response to his text messages. Well, at first, you know, I have to understand, he just breaks up with me on Valentine's Day. Yeah. That's the girl thing. You guys talked about him saying, I love you on Valentine's Day. Well, he broke up with me on Valentine's Day. She's making him pay. Well, she should. She should. No, I mean... I was really confused. I was like, okay, we're at the restaurant. You tell me you love me. I don't know this is coming. And then you break up with me. Like, what the hell is going on? You know? Oh, my gosh. I was so confused. And I was angry. And I was hurt. And I was like, I'm not... What are you going to tell me this time? I feel you, Jen. Like, and it's not... And so, I mean... Lauren's like, I'd make him pay, too. Yeah. They're so... Women are so good at it. Did he bleed? Did he believe it? Because he should have. It's not about making them pay. It's just like, look, I need. Grovel. Grovel for me. I want you to grovel. I need time because I don't know what you want now. This is the woman talking. I want you to become a puppy dog. Grovel for me. You're not done. No, maybe she was seeing that he was.

1:46:19He was not necessarily screening what he was saying over text, so she was like, I'm not going to go down that road as well and say something I don't mean. Very well done. Very well done, attorney Lauren. Very well done. They're all masters at the ignore bit. They are masters at it. It's called the ignore bit. I mean, I just didn't want to just come out with something that was going to sound, you know, and I honestly, like, at first I was just really hurt and really angry, you know? Yeah. I mean, I was like, what are you doing? So, I mean. That night, it was just that. And then the next day, I was still in that, and I had to work. You know what, Jen? You changed my mind, and I'm being serious. You know what? I give it to Jen. You know why? I give it to Jen because I'm a guy that always talks about consequence. It was a consequence. Dude broke up with her. It was a consequence. Well, dude, the best thing is he's going over there tonight, taking a bottle of wine and Woodsy's Valentine's Day mix. You can find on MikeyShow.com and my blog. And all will be forgiven. Yeah, Jen, now you're probably not going to recognize any of those songs. I hope that you just take it for what it is, which is the thought that counts, okay? I really hope you guys can work it out, though, because I really think his intentions were in the right place, even though they may have come out a little wrong. Jen, we're going to let you go, okay? Tony, hang on the line. Jen, we're going to let you go. Thank you for coming on. Took a lot of coaxing to get Jen to come on. Tony, are you there? Yeah.

1:47:44What are you thinking? I can't believe she's having me over. That a boy. Make that real right. I'm just grateful. You make it real right. Get over there and make it right tonight, pal. That's right. Woodsy, what would you go over with? Because I know Woodsy would pull this off good. I would take dinner. I would take dinner. That's cool. I would take dinner and I'd take wine and lots of wine. Lots of wine? Maybe a couple of roofies. Okay, you idiot. Too far. Ridiculous. No, I would take dinner and I'd take wine and I'd probably take a car. Your guitar? Definitely my guitar. Right? Guaranteed. Do something. What would you do? You go over there. You see her. He's going to show you how it's done, Tony. Maybe Tony can't play the guitar. Yeah, Tony can figure it out. Oops, come on. Look at that. Today is the day that I screwed it all up with you. I'm sorry that I'm such a dork and I texted you all those times too. You didn't text anybody the way that you didn't text me when you didn't text me. All those times. Don't use these words, Tony. And I am so sorry that you couldn't text me. Not even one time could you even freaking text me.

1:49:13And I was so sad and I was so bummed that you wouldn't text me too that I don't even want to do this anymore. You know what? Stop. And I'm getting, I'm going home. Don't do this. There you go, Tony. All right, man. Yeah, absolutely. Good luck, Tony. It's going to be great, dude. You're going to be great. Real good. Real good. Making plays over here. That's right, Woodsy. I like it. Who on the show did yoga yesterday and then dropped two and a half pounds and then made lobster caught in Florida for dinner? Wow. We'll tell you when we come back. That's a lot. We're also going to play a game of Would You Rather. Oh, no. Oh, no. Wow. Our phone number here is 570-1949. You can text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm Mikey, the host of the show. The show is also made up of Woods, Lauren, Sienna, and your boy Jay. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. This is the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar.

1:50:44A couple good shows in town this weekend. Anya Marina will play the Casbah. That's Anya. She's going to play the Casbah this Saturday night, so you can go see her there. Brendan Benson plays The Belly Up on Sunday night. Both of those shows are 21 and up. Tegan and Sarah play Copley Symphony Hall Wednesday, March 3rd. The Temper Trap just announced an $8 FM 94.9 about the music show. That's at The Belly Up Monday, April 19th. And tickets for that show will go on sale this coming Friday the 19th at noon. And Mastodon, play House of Blues on Cinco de Mayo. So there you have it. Get out there and see some shows. The FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar can be heard four times daily. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar at fm949sd.com. Do you remember when you used a dial-up to access the Internet? Remember how slow that was? Thankfully, things have changed, and now you're doing more and more on the Internet. Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Deuce, The Huffington Post. You just couldn't do all of this with Dial-Up. And you know how some levels of DSL from the phone company aren't that much faster than Dial-Up? Here's the deal. If you want super fast Internet without all the lag you get with DSL, switch to Earthlink from Time Warner Cable.

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1:56:45New Robitussin to go. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego. The Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of the Mike Show. M1 Tim. Text it in to 949mikey at gmail.com to say Woods hit it right on the head. Us guys do some crazy stuff when we're in love. It does come from a good place, ladies. I promise. That's M1 Tim. Yep. Let's see. M1 Daniel. He says, what's up with a woman that won't say she loves somebody after six months because it's in a public place? She doesn't really have those feelings for him. That is the problem. No. Bail, dude. Don't waste your money or dinner or wine. Wow. That's harsh. That's pretty hardcore, right? I feel what Jen was saying. And then, okay, let's have a radio station call because that's going to not add to the weirdness level. Yeah, I guess it does. What did I just say, though?

1:58:06What? We do crazy. We can't think. You want to know something? Clearly. Hey, let me tell you. I think that women say that. But then in another way, I think that women are sort of flattered by the fact that it happened. No. No, they used to be. Now you know what we are? You know what we used to be. They used to get flattered by it. Now you know what we are, Mikey? What? We're stalkers. Really? When was this alleged used to be? Used to be. When did that happen? Because literally, like when I was in college, if you met a girl. and you got her number and you didn't call, you were a jerk. You know, you're a giant D. Not that he didn't do that. No, no, I'm not saying at this point, but I'm saying now if you meet a girl, get a number, you call her once, she doesn't call you back, you call her maybe two days later or the next day, you're a stalker. And it creeps her out. No, you're not. 100%. Lauren, what about this? She wouldn't text him back. She wouldn't call him back. Dude gets her on the radio, does a little chivalrous stuff. Yes. He's willing to fight. Dinner. Dinner. He's going over there tonight. Dinner. Guy's going to close business tonight. Don't even know what that means. You know what that means. Close business. Creep me out. Guy's going to close biz. Creep me. Creep me. Can someone tell Woodsy to aim his webcam a little lower so he can actually see the guitar when he's playing it? Thanks much, M1 Speedy. I thought you were going to say so they can actually see his Argyle sweater that he's wearing. That you said you liked. I do.

1:59:30Sorry, I didn't wear my prison uniform today. How come you're doing... Why do you have to do a thing like Danny and Sandy? Danny and Sandy. It's like, yeah, you're one way around your friends, but when you're with them together, it's just you and him. You say the sweet things. That's right. Because... He plays this tough guy. I'm not the tough guy. She's Danny Zuko. I wear pink shirts. He's going to finish the business tonight. I'm not. That guy's going to close business tonight. He's going to close business tonight, and I'm in an outgoing sweater. What am I, Italian? Off the air, she treats you like she... Like a brother. Yeah. And then on the air, she will attack you as if you have a pork chopper on your neck. My shoes are from Milan. What am I, Italian? My sweater. It's for Argyle from Banana Republic. It's true. Maybe my favorite voice you've ever done. It's awful. Maybe my favorite voice you've ever done. It's making me choke. Who did yoga yesterday? Yes. I'm guessing Lauren. No. You would be guessing wrong. And not only did Jay do yoga yesterday, our 46-year-old producer, who's in better shape than any of us. Put together. Except for Lauren.

2:00:34The two of them. Except for Lauren. The two of them are in really good shape. The three of us, I'm sorry, we're not as in good a shape. I'm sorry, we're not as in good a shape as Lauren and Jay. They're like health nuts. They're health nuts. So here's what he says. When you have to question someone when we're getting burritos, breakfast burritos, Bob, we're like, Lauren, do you want one? You do? Then you know that person's in good shape. When you don't even have to ask me, then it's an issue. Yesterday, Yesterday, our boy Jay went and did that 107 degree yoga. Bikram. Yeah. Bikram yoga. It's Indian for insane. Yeah. Oof. It's Indian for why did you do that? So he says. I did it. So proud of you. He says. Proud papa. He decided to weigh himself before he went to yoga. 177 pounds. Good.

2:01:33Lord. Oh, dude, I haven't weighed that since the first grade. Jay, I'm 50 pounds heavier than you. Wow. How tall are you? Six. Six even. Right up. I'm 6'1", and I'm 50. I'm 220. Jay is a surfer. He eats tofu. Yeah, and your health ranger, my friend. He's very healthy. He says he topped out at 177. A little heavier than I'd like to be, he says. Stop it. He went into a 108 degree yoga room and did yoga. When he was done, he weighed 174 and a half. He dropped two and a half pounds in sweat. That's crazy. Then came home and he and his wife made a lobster for dinner that her dad brought back with him from Florida where he caught it. You dropped two and a half pounds in yoga. Two and a half pounds. I dropped two and a half pounds of spaghetti into my gullet. Yesterday in our meeting. He did. He had a trough. He came in with a bucket of spaghetti. He ate the whole thing. Killed it. You're a guy I would want to date, though. Yeah, I know you. I know I am. And I'm going to say something nice, kind of, because I would feel so comfortable eating out with you. You can do anything with me. I turn women into, like, slobs and then they just don't care anymore. Like, everybody wants to relax and cuddle with the kid. There you go.

2:03:01But I eat like crazy. I had ice cream for lunch yesterday. Hey, I don't want to hear it. Health nut. Yeah, he says he came home and he ate ice cream for lunch. Herbal ice cream. Yeah. The kind with extra seaweed in it. What kind, Jay? I think it was dryers. Macadamia nut. And it was the Girl Scout one. The limited edition Girl Scout chopped up cookie one. And then I took a nap. There you go. He's a health nut, though, man. I tried to be a health nut yesterday. Me too. Didn't work out. I didn't. I did not try to be a helper. I think that, like, I'm going to start trying to be one more. And I think, in turn, you will, too. Okay. No, you won't. Maybe I will. Me and you should go to the gym together. I'm a sheep. Yeah. Mike, go to the gym with me. Go to the gym with me. Okay. No, you won't go. I was. If I have somebody to work out with, I'll work out every day. I hate going myself. Before I got ousted. From the other station? I was going and, like, working out with a trainer. Well, come work with me, because I was with a trainer, too. I just need somebody to work out with. I don't want to work out, though, with... It's a competition. No, it's not competition at all. I worked out with my brother, and, like, he's way bigger than me, but we did the same weights. We just did a lot of reps. It's good motivation to have somebody, like, come on, put it up there. You guys don't live in the same area. I just want my headphones on. And you can.

2:04:28But how can we work out together if I got my headphones on? You can switch in and out on the machine, so you don't have to switch with a stranger. We talk about what we're going to do before, and then we go execute it, but we push each other to do it. I'm not going to be screaming at you, get it up, come on. Come on, chubs, lift, lift. I'm not that dude. I just need to work out to be more in shape. Mikey would be there and you would be working out and you'd want to be pushed. And Mikey would be like, oh, you're good, man. Yeah, you're fine, dude. You look too nice. And when I would be lifting and Woodsy would be motivating me, I'd be like, dude, I'm trying to listen to my... Get out of my face. Every time he would go, yeah, come on. I never would do that. I would take an earphone out and go, what was it? I would never do that. I'm not that guy. What were you saying? I don't like being alone. I don't like going places alone. So if I have a buddy to work out with, it's so much better. I'm going to get flooded with M1. I go in there and I listen to Red. I have a mix of Red music. And so this is my workout music. Let me play you my workout music. This gets me all angry. This is not stuff girls would work out to ever. I love it.

2:05:44Right, Sienna? You would never work out today. I want Milo Cyrus to party in the USA. Really? I'm running. I'm feeling good. Put my hands up. Oh, yeah, I got to get mad. Yeah, come on. I'll slap you. I have to get mad. Britney Spears, all that. Lauren, what do you work out to? Grateful Dead. Yeah, something acoustic for the Grateful Dead, yeah. I listen to my boyfriend, Matt, on CD. Yeah, yeah, I listen to his CDs. No, I actually listen to the same stuff that Sienna listens to when I work out. No, you don't. Thank you. Cheesy, yeah, like, cheesy, like, workout music. I listen to, like, God Smack. Yeah. Guys are different. Guys need to be, like, mad, and they're like, I'm tough, and girls are like, ooh, like, I'm feeling motivated. Look at, Britney Spears looks good. I'm going to the gym today. What's that? Britney? When I work out, yeah. When I work out, when I clean the house. One, two, three. I'm going today, pal. It's mindless. I just can't picture you listening to Britney Spears. I know, I can't either. I have to. As Woods puts it, Lauren runs so much mouth about artists like Britney Spears, I can't imagine. There's a Kanye song that is a really good workout song. He's like talking about working out throughout the song. Oh, I don't like that song. And it's like...

2:06:57push-up or something, and it's really, it's a good workout. Yeah, this is one. I'm on the treadmill. What is that garbage? Oh, that was actually me singing. It's terrible. This is the difference between girls and guys, let me tell you. I would never work out today. Never. I would totally. Toxic is a great workout. It's like a female tattoo. Dude, it reminds me of what everybody sounds like when they've thrown everything up that they can throw up. Dude, that's auto-tune. You're the one that's a fan of... You get to the very end. It's the best. Do Toxic. Go to Toxic.

2:07:58Oh, you just went to the one on your iPod. These are the ones on my iPod. Let me tell you what I have on my iPod from Brittany. I have it. I have baby one more time. Oh, terrible song. One more time. I love that song. You drive me crazy. Crazy. Sometimes. No. Sometimes I run. I could do all of them. I'm a slave for you. I'm a slave for you. Not a good workout song, that one. Oops, I did it again. Oops, I did it again. And Stronger. Stronger. No, see, none of those are good. You need, like, Toxic or Womanizer. Womanizer. Yeah, that's a good one. That's what you work out to? That's exactly what it's up to. Terrible. Let's see. That, and then, like, Justin Timberlake. Get, like, some Chevelle. Some Godsmart. Yes, so good. You feel like you're smiling while you're running. Feeling good. That's what hell will be. Dude, it's really hot and Britney Spears just over and over. Serious. Imagine we have it on. We're in the basement. We got the loudspeaker on. Hey, Woods. What's going on, dude? Let's work. I'm going to throw on some Britney Spears, dude. Let's just get it. Come on, bro. Yeah. The gym that I worked out at.

2:09:29That's the kind of stuff they play. I would lose my mind. I'd walk in and be like, oh, God, I'd put my headphones on to get dressed and undressed. See, I could never just listen to this in the car driving. Oh, I totally could. But it is what you'll work out to. M1 Michelle is on the line and says she begs to differ. Right, Michelle? Most definitely. I have what I call a Derby Day Adrenaline iPod playlist, and it's all like Pantera, Black Sabbath. Nice. See, I would not picture a chick working out to Pantera. My wife loves Black Sabbath, which makes me love my wife even more. Oh, I just can't imagine a chick working out to Pantera. I'd be like, lifting weights. I play roller derby, and that's where I get going. Money, dude. What's Pantera's song? Well, I can't really say it. I think I know which one it is. Does it start with an F? Whoa. I'm going to work this out acoustic. Does this do anything for you, Sienna? No. Turn it up, dude. No. Turn it up. Do anything for you, Lauren? Not a thing. You couldn't work out this? I understand why guys can. I mean, it makes sense. It makes me angry. Yeah. Yeah. Right? Now you girls get it. There you go. Thank you, M1 Michelle. We appreciate it. There you go. Those roller derby girls are very sexy. Yeah, let me tell you. I kind of like that.

2:10:59Take you out, bro. See, I put a little Eye of the Tiger in there. Ooh, I could work out to some Eye of the Tiger. Never. Jump starter. Eye of the Tiger. When I was a kid, I used to work out to the Rocky soundtrack. Yeah, of course you did. Loved it. Loved it. I know a guy that that's exactly how he lost tons of weight. Rocky? He listened to the Rocky soundtrack. It will get you, dude. And he said that just by, you know, it was really motivational. Just by sitting there listening to it, he actually just shedded pounds. Yeah. He went out on the, you know, he started like working out to it. And once he did, like he said, it couldn't help but get him motivated. This song does something for guys. I don't, I don't get it. I'm shadowboxing right now. So am I. See, I'm from the Philly area. So this does something for me too. Really? Makes me want to go work out. Hey, Woods. Yeah. Your butt's starting to look real good, dude. You're working out real good, dude. I'm just saying. Every day. I don't mean it like in a weird way. I'm just saying like I've been watching you work out now for like three weeks, man. Yeah, your abs. My abs? Dude, I don't mean this weird, but your abs are sexy, dude. Hey, I'm not saying it to be weird, man. I'm just saying. Your glutes, they're fine, bro. Hey, don't think I'm saying this to be weird to you, all right? You're sexy.

2:12:27So how exactly do you mean that, if not weirdly? I don't mean it weird, man. Like, I'm just saying. Hey, turn around, dude. You knocked him down. Why don't you try knocking me down? I'm not trying to say anything weird here. I'm just saying when you turned around right now. Well, it comes across a little bit weird. I know it does, but I don't mean it like all I'm saying is my friend's got a great butt. Well, what if someone said that about you? Would that weird you out? No, not if I was working out as hard as that sexy beast. Sexy. Wow. Hey, I'm not saying it to be weird. I'm just saying, hey, pull your shirt up a little bit. It sounds weird. It does. Does that sound weird when I say it? Yeah. A little bit. Just a little. I don't mean it to be weird. I'm just saying. I mean, you can say other words instead of sexy. Okay, fine. You look really hot, dude. All right? Thanks, brother. Maybe not hot. Hey, listen. Toned. What do you look like in your underwear? In my underwear? I'm not saying it to be weird. I'm just saying, you know, because he's been working out. That's all. Sounds weird. Why do you got to try to make it all weird like that? I'm just saying. Because it's weird. Because he'll be standing there in his underwear in front of you. Yes. That's a little weird. Sorry, man. I thought we was talking normal over here. Not in the dressing room. I thought we was just saying.

2:13:46I just wanted to see what the guy looked like if he had baby oil on. I'm just saying because, hey, not to be weird. I'm just saying if he put baby oil on, it would show how cut and ripped he is. That's all I'm saying. Do you have baby oil with you? I have baby oil on. Oh, so you can just hug him and then you'll know. Okay, let me just ask this. And if it's weird, you tell me if it's weird, all right? Would it be weird if I shaved your chest? What? What? What? How would you feel if someone was shaving your chest? It just depends. If you're doing it like in a way to work out, it don't bother me, man. It's a little strange. Listen, man. I shave your chest. I put some baby oil on you. It's only because we're trying to work. We're working out, man. Are you going to be modeling for a calendar? That's what we do. That's a great idea, dude. I'll take a couple Polaroids of you. Hey, it's just a workout. Before and after pictures. You're the sexiest man at 94.9 calendar. Yeah, there you go. Rocky. That's right. Rocky music does something. I wonder if he just plays that song everywhere he goes. I would. It's on repeat. Tell him. Eye of the Tiger will get you too. Yeah. Forget it. It's a huge song. Come on, that's lame. It's great.

2:15:03You don't think that's lame? No. Nobody works out to Survivor. Yes, I do. I work out to Asia. When I ran the half marathon, that was like my pump-up song. Are you for real? I'm for real. Wow. Mike works out to Genesis and Asia and Boston. Yeah. That's right. Whitney Houston's more upbeat songs. Just the upbeat ones. Oh, I wanna dance with somebody. Right. Just those. The other ones I couldn't, obviously. 570. You can also text us if you want to. 949mikey at gmail.com. Give us a call. What else is going on? Oh, there's a whole news story about JFK. There's footage released from a museum from the morning of his assassination, which I saw it.

2:15:54There's nothing to it, really. It's not. It's just it's footage that was never out to the public. And it came out yesterday from the Sixth Floor Museum. And it's of JFK arriving in Dallas the day of his assassination. And I guess the guy who took the video was 15 at the time. Really? Mm-hmm. And he just never looked at the stuff? Well, he gave it to a museum, and they, I guess, had it, and then they found it, and now it's out, and it's all over the place. So if you want to see it, actually put it on my blog, mikeyshow.com. But it just shows JFK, you know, in Dallas that morning, which is kind of crazy. Yeah. But a 15-year-old took it, which I think is pretty cool. Here's some workout music. Oh, absolutely, dude. Yeah. Tawny Katane on the roof, right? It's a different type of workout. There you go, Jay. It doesn't get much better than this. Let me ask you, Sienna. What? You're 24. You were born in 1985. Yeah. Have you ever heard this song? Yeah. You have? Uh-huh. I am about to marry a man that's a little bit older than me. That is true. Now, did he introduce you to it? He's introduced me to a lot of music. For those of you who don't know, Sienna's fiance is turning 98 years old next thing.

2:17:07He just turned 99. He's 39? 38. Same age as my wife. There we go. I like him a little bit older. Yeah, me too. She's older than you, Woodsy. Yeah, she is. More mature. Well, she is. She's the rock and the glue. Weird story. They were passing out condoms at the Olympics. Yeah. A Canadian skier at the Olympics, her name is Emily Bryden. She says that there were over 100,000 condoms being passed out during the opening ceremonies around that day. And apparently she said 100,000 condoms were not enough. She says what happens at the Olympic Village stays at the Olympic Village. So I guess there's a lot going on that we don't know about. Yeah, really? Between everyone. It's like a big party. Everybody likes to slay. Oh, yeah. When I think of the Olympics, I think of making out. Frenching. Frenching. Gross. I hate it when you guys say Frenching. But they're just a little Frenching. It's innocent. You don't need condoms for Frenching. Well, they need it for other things. I'm glad they're being safe. I got the gold medal in Frenching. She said that there's a lot of pent-up stress over the week, so it's safe to say that some good times happen. Wow. I had no idea. I know. Learned something new about the Olympics.

2:18:29One of the Taliban's top military commanders has been captured. That's good news. Should I try to pronounce his name? Please. Mullah Abdul Ghani Baradar. That was great. I know. I know. I know. Yes. Word is, he's been captured in Pakistan in a secret raid a couple days ago. He was caught in an operation conducted by Pakistan's military spy agency and the CIA. Wow. So they say he's like one of the biggest guys. He's like the number two guy. Yeah, the number two guy. And this is the highest figure that they've captured since 2001 in Afghanistan. That's awesome. Hope he's ready for the dirt nap. That's right. Let's get him. Let's do this. Would you rather. I'm going to give you the would you rather and then you're going to call. 570-1949. You can also text us 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm scared of these. Would you rather have white crust on the corner of your mouth? It's the worst. Like now? For life.

2:19:50For life. For life. You can't get rid of it. I'm wiping my mouth as we speak. I know. We all did. We all used our core finger and our thumb. And we were like, oh, oh, get it off. I hate that people are talking. It's like cake. Yeah, I was just going to say, I'm talking about the kind that when the person's talking, it's going meow, meow. Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow. Okay? So would you rather have white crust in the corner of your mouth for the rest of your life? No. Or extremely noticeable B.O. B.O. The rest of your life? B.O. Really? I don't want to be the stinky kid. I would just have perfume all the time. No. No, there's no getting a... Sorry. Not the spirit of the question. You don't know that you're that stinky. If that's the deal, then you could go, oh, I'll just wear... I'll put makeup. Yeah, I'll put makeup or I'll put something, you know, like a veil. I'll wear a veil. You have to... It has to be out there. And you have to smell yourself. Yeah. But what's worse is the humiliation of humans seeing that spit or smelling your body. And they know, like... They know it's you. Here comes Stinky Lauren or here comes Meow Meow Lauren. Meow Meow.

2:21:08Yeah, because when she talks, meow, meow, meow, meow. I got to go with the crust. You would take the crust? 100%. No one would ever fringe you, dude. Fair enough, dude. Body odor, after I sweat and if I stink, I freak out. I freak out. I will take the B.O. Oh, my God. Now, I'm thinking of a certain type of B.O. I'm thinking of underarm B.O. Oh, it smells like rotten onions. No, it doesn't. Yes, it does. It smells worse than rotten onions. It smells like onions. Underarms? Worse. Here's the thing, though. You're saying extremely noticeable. Have you... You know what I'm thinking, though? I'm thinking, like, Sting does it. Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt. Matthew McConaughey. Matthew McConaughey. Natural oils. But maybe we're talking worse, though. Like, I think we're talking worse. We are. We're talking worse. That's the difference between someone that doesn't wear deodorant and someone that, like... Yeah, it's more than deodorant, right? They stink. They're storing diapers in their armpits. It's worse than just underarms. Smells like Indian food. That's inappropriate. And you're being inappropriate. What? Indian food doesn't smell bad. Made me vomit outside an Indian restaurant. I know, but you're ridiculous.

2:22:29It sure did. What would you take, Sienna? This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make. I think I would go with the body odor. You can't take the meow meow, right? The meow meow is so gross. Maybe you find a dude or a girl that doesn't mind the body odor. Dude, think about it. I took this crust. You'll take the crust? I'll take the crust. Dude, if you're in a crowd. Okay. If you have BO, you won't be in a crowd, pal. If you have BO and you're in a crowd, they don't know it's you. If you have Meow Meow. People would know it's you. Yeah. You're the only one with Meow Meow. And people are like. But no one will even. Like, you have to be pretty close to someone to see the crowd. No, you do not. Yeah, you do. No one's going to get close to you with that kind of BO. Hang out in clubs. Yeah. Real good. In the dark. Never be kissed. We're eight feet from each other right now. We could see it if we had it clearly. All right. Do I have snuff in my teeth? Yes. I can't tell from here. Exactly. But white spit on the side of your mouth, I could see. It would glow in a black light at a club. Of course it would. You'd have to find a lady with a white crust on her lips to kiss. Yeah, exactly. And you could fridge her. Yeah. M1 Drake. Ew, that'd be so gross. How's it going, Mikey? How you doing? Double meow meow. Which one would you take?

2:23:54I'm going to go with the bow. Why? Because, man, like you were saying, if you're in a crowd, nobody's going to know it anyway. What's the difference? But if you've got that white stuff in your mouth, on the corners of your mouth, that white stuff, everybody, they know. And, like, you can't. You don't have a chance. You can't play off B.O. even if you're in a crowd. They know it's you. Yeah. They know it's you. This guy next to me freaking. Yeah, and that just evokes so many bad physical reactions. You're changing my mind. Weird. I just desperately tried to search for chapstick because even talking about it is creeping me out. M1 Will. I'd rather take the crust in my mouth connected to my eyes because I once had to work with a guy who had such bad BO that he had to take medication. And we worked at a gym. So guys were smelling really bad on the... How do you have to take meds for BO? I'm telling you. There's a medical condition for you. But they have like bad breath too. Like halitosis. They have it all. Would you rather have halitosis or BO? Halitosis. No way. I'm so. You can taste halitosis. I know. I'm so subconscious. I'm constantly asking my wife, is my breath okay? Is my breath okay? My wife wakes up in the morning and she has stinky breath. I call her Hal.

2:25:17Howl? Howl. Howl. Why howl? Howl a toast. Howl. I was thinking immediately of an owl. Oh, my God. Like, howl. Oh, my God. I don't know why. I'll go easy, howl. That is so mean. Oh, that's awful. It's just called morning breath. Howl. You'll do it from now on. I know. Call Todd howl. Howl. If he ever says that to me, I'm going to cry. Knowing you'll die tomorrow, would you rather? Spend your last night out to dinner with your closest friends or have it with your favorite movie star? Friends. No question. No question for me either. Friends. Who picked a movie star? Superficial person with no friends. Yeah, someone with no friends. Somebody with no friends, right? Yeah. If you had to pick a movie star, who would it be? No one. Megan Fox. They're just people. You'd rather be with people that are your friends. But some people you think are interesting. Like, I'd like to talk to Benicio Del Toro. Weird. Your last pick? What? So I want to talk to Benicio Del Toro. What? Megan Fox. Nah, it would be a dude. Not mine. Really? My last night on Earth? You're not even interested in talking to Megan Fox. You roll the dice. Your last night on Earth, it should be your one. Maybe she takes pity on you. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. It's important in life to make time for the things that matter. To make time for fun.

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2:31:39between Carmel Mountain Road and Mercy Road, also slowing. We've got speed, looks like the upper 20s right now. This report brought to you by Centrum Silver. Centrum Silver age-adjusted multivitamins. They've got key antioxidants, other nutrients that help protect the health of your heart, your eyes, and bones as you age. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Now back to the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Mikey, heard you guys bantering about the Olympics and your lack of interest. Couldn't agree more. It's M1 Steve. Well, it's the Winter Olympics. It's hard. You know, yesterday I watched women's cross-country skiing. How was that? Oh, riveting. Riveting, I'm sure. And there was no American in the lead, which instantly made me like, well, what's a point? If an American isn't leading something, I'm like, ah. I'll watch Shaun White tomorrow. Yeah. The big red flying tomato zeppelin. He's a tomato.

2:33:17Gotta watch his tomato. Red Zeppelin. Red Zeppelin. I love it. It's not going to stick, but I love it. I like it. Earlier, Sienna was concerned about a woman that was curling. I know. There's a woman in the Olympics that does curling. Weightlifter, right? That's what I thought. Weightlifting. I mean, it's just when you pick up a weight and just curl. Sienna thought it was when you take, you know, dumbbells and you curl. It's a common misconception. It is. Five and a half months pregnant, this woman. Come on now. If she can sweep, she can curl. 570-1949 is the number. And the text is 949mikey at gmail.com. Let's see. Would you rather? A little bit later, we're going to be doing Dude, You're Dumb. Yeah. Dude, you're dumb. Dude, you're dumb. You're dumb. If you've never heard it, you will like it. Floyd Landis. Oh, great. Floyd Landis is a dude that was doping, right? He's a cyclist. You know, he's in the Lance Armstrong cycling thing. So with the deal with him, didn't he win the Tour de France? Yeah. And then they said, eh. He was doping. Doping. He's using dope. Yeah, he's using steroids. All kinds of good stuff. He is basically, there's an arrest warrant for him.

2:34:43in connection with a case of data hacking at a doping laboratory. So it's basically... Hacking on a computer? I guess, but it's part of a larger corporate cybercrime investigation involving a Paris-based consulting group that may have paid intermediaries to get into this company's security information. Really? He's involved in this somehow, so it just got from basically bad to worse for Mr. Floyd Landis. It's pretty gnarly. And we talked earlier, Mike, about Bodie Miller, the mouth of the South, finally winning a medal. I actually have a little audio on your array. I mean, it's sort of a tough thing to articulate. You know, the medal I don't think is so important for me personally. You know, I've won downhills before. I've beat Axel before when he skied his best. Axel Rose, yes. He's beat me when he skied his best. You know, it's at the end of the day, in certain ways, it is still just a ski race. Yeah. So very humble as usual. You say he runs mouth. He loves to run mouth. Yeah. Very humble as usual. And, you know, I mean, hey, he finally won a medal. It was a bronze. Third place. If you ain't first, you're last. That's kind of weak. I hate the second. I hate the third. Yeah, exactly. It's tough.

2:36:04So, again, we talked about earlier, pitchers and catchers report tomorrow. I went out to Padres Fan Day. The people are excited. They're excited. There was a great turnout. Got to see some players. Got to meet some players. I blew some interviews. Didn't turn the recorder on. Yeah, it was perfect. It happens. But I've got Bud Black, who's the Padres manager, talking about their newest addition, John Garland. And we're really excited about our newest acquisition, John Garland. John's a veteran. Pitcher who's been durable, who's won ball games, who's taken the ball every fifth day. Really like what John brings to the club. I think he can be another leader for our younger pitchers. We think with his experience, he can do a great job for our club. There you go. They got some good young arms. Hey, I'm a baseball fan first. I'm a Yankee fan second. I'm going to be at it as many games as I can go to. That's cool. For sure. Craig Robinson is going to be in the studio, and Craig plays Daryl on The Office. Let's start with the warehouse. What bothers you as guys, you know? My priority is safety. Okay. So it really bothers me when somebody comes in here speeding around on a lift, playing with it like a toy. It kind of gets under my skin, okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shh, shh. Don't shush me. That was just... That bothers me, too. I was breathing. Pam shushes me. It drives me crazy. I hate shushing. You know, that's the thing. Okay, what is...

2:37:30That is great. He's brilliant. That is great. He's like one of my favorite characters. Such a good contrast to Michael Scott on there. Oh, yeah. And he's been in some of my favorite movies. He's got a new movie coming out, and that's what he's going to be in here promoting. And the movie is called Hot Tub Time Machine. You want to hear something? I have a buddy in town, Adam Wentz. He lives here. He texted me. He said he was at a sneak preview last night. He said it was hysterical. Well, you know what the idea is? Hysterical. The idea of it is a group of best friends, right? Like all of us. Yeah, exactly. But it's all dudes. Okay. All right, so it's John Cusack and Craig, who's coming in, and a guy named Rob Corddry. And basically the deal is that they're all kind of down on their luck guys. One of them's been dumped by his girlfriend. The other one is the party guy who can't find the party type of dude, right? Woods. The woodsy. Right. The other one. is actually the role that's played by Craig. His wife controls everything he does. Jay. No. It's go time, buddy. Let's do this. Jay. And so after a crazy night of drinking in a ski resort hot tub, the guys wake up with their heads pounding in the year 1986. I can't wait. I love it.

2:38:53Sounds funny. It sounds like I watched the little preview or the trailer, if you will. It looks like Dumb and Dumber meets Back to the Future meets The Hangover. That's funny. Meets Ski School. Yeah. Remember those old skiing movies when we were younger? Yeah. Yeah, and he's in it again. And also tonight is Mardi Gras here in San Diego. And Craig and his friend Clark are going to be grand marshals of Mardi Gras tonight. Yeah, maybe the kid goes down for a while. I know the kid has a job. I know that. So, you know, whatever. I don't want to tell the kid what to do. I don't want to tell the kid what to do. I'm just saying. The kid's also the first one here every morning. That's right. Okay. Yeah. He's the one that has to yawn every two and a half minutes, though, too, right? That's the same kid. Fair enough. Kid's also the only one that refers to himself in the third person. Fair enough. So, anyway, they're both coming in here. Clark, by the way, the guy that he's bringing in here, I guess is BFFs with Michael Cera.

2:39:56Oh, you're going to have so much to talk about, aren't you? Well, I wasn't a fan of the movie, but I do like Michael Cera. He's great. Michael Cera's great. He's a really funny dude. So we'll talk to him. Clark was in the movie Superbad. So there's a lot of stuff to talk to with these guys. He was? Yeah, he was in Superbad. I'm excited, dude. Really excited. Did you guys bring your cameras? Because I want to pick. Yeah, we do. Did he text you guys last night? No, just you. He texted me, bring your camera. I was like, why? Why? Because we have a celebrity guest coming to the studio. Loser. You guys get after each other like nobody's business. I know. And I got to tell you, whenever Woods and Sienna get after each other, Lauren could not go into a snail shell. It's like a stick up for me. It's like no room. She's like a hermit crab. And when the fish goes by and the hermit crab goes. Yeah. Back into the thing. As soon as they start with each other, she just goes right into that show. It's like back to my childhood days, you know. But we love each other, too. Yeah, we love each other. It's happy. It's big sister. It's big brother, little sister. Yeah. And I'm good at pestering. It is. You're such a pest. I know. It's fun. But one thing that's really cool about Sienna and that Woodsy loves is that she picked the movie Valentine's Day for us to go see today.

2:41:21You do have a flaw after all. Oh, yeah? What's that? Your job. I thought women like doctors. And we do like lab coats, but they're flying around everywhere. Jennifer Garter, Patrick Dunsey. I'm only going to San Francisco for one night. Couldn't somebody else do it just tonight? No, I'm the best. What if I like it? You will, and I will too. It's going to be embarrassing. I think I'm going to cry. It's going to be embarrassing. I want Milk Duds and Sour Patch Kids. Popcorn. I'm going the Milk Duds popcorn round. Oh, that was so good. Those Milk Duds were good. I'm fiending right now. Lauren will be the bored one. Yep. Texting. I'm already bored just talking about it. You'll have your week, too. When is her week? Next week? Is it next week? No, I'm like the last one. Yeah. I can't wait to see what that's going to be. Woods is like a five-year-old. Yeah. There he is. I love it. They're here. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. Craig and Clark. Hello. What's up? Come on in, guys. Right in the middle? Come on in. Come on in, man. All right. It's awesome. Hey, everybody. This is rad. Hey, how you doing? Good to see you. Come on in. Oh, this is cool. This is great, dude. Hey, listen. We're talking about the... Lauren, you come sit by me.

2:42:38What's up? Hi, Sienna. Nice to meet you. How you doing, man? It's good to see you. Oh, whoa, whoa. You just caught me. What's up, man? If you were watching the webcam, this is rad. Craig just caught me. I was falling out of the chair. He was able to catch me from falling out of my chair. That's how we're doing here. There's a lot going on right now, Mike. I know. I'm sorry. Everyone's very confused. That's... We're good. We're getting all situated. How you doing, man? Hey, man, how are you? Clark, right? Clark, how are you? Yes. Yes. I am very interested to talk to both of you guys. Have a seat. Good deal. You guys are going to be the Grand Marshals tonight at the Big Mardi Gras? Oh, yeah. Do you need one more? They've made a huge mistake. Yeah. You guys ever been to San Diego? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Many, many times. How did it happen? On my way to Tijuana. Yeah. Yeah, big TJ guy. Yes. How did this happen that they asked you guys to be the Grand Marshals? We're amazing parade-ers. We're pros. I mean, you'll see tonight. I can't really give it away what we do at parades. But we just left New Orleans. New Orleans. And we're going to parade there. And now we're, you know, parading here. And we just try to hit as many parades as we can a year. Now, both of you guys do stand-up.

2:44:00Do both of you guys? No, I've never done stand-up. You've never done it? No. But you were in the movie Superbad. I had like one line in it. Okay. Yeah. That's one more line than I've ever had in a movie called Superbad. That's true. Yes. I remember it. And Craig is in the TV show The Office. Did you hear the clip that we played of you, Craig? I did not. I'm going to play it for you because it's awesome. Okay. Let's start with the warehouse. What bothers you as guys? You know? My priority is safety. Okay. So it really bothers me when somebody comes in here speeding around on a lift, playing with it like a toy. It kind of gets under my skin, okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shh, shh. Don't shush me. That was just... That bothers me, too. I was breathing. Pam shushes me. It drives me crazy. I hate shushing. You know, that's the thing. Craig, do you remember doing that? I remember. We were sitting around in the warehouse. And that was a very, oh, you. Is that scripted or is that? A lot of, I think the shushing was not scripted. It just happened. Yeah. And then Patrice O'Neal was, uh, was in that scene and he says, he was like, don't shush a Negro. Some stuff didn't make it. That was very funny. But, uh, yeah, I remember that. That's awesome. How many takes do you guys do usually? As you know, it's hard to tell some of them, you know, two or three and some of them 10.

2:45:1515. Is there ever a time where they're like, that's it, we've got it? Like one take and they're like, we don't need to do that again? Or is it always there's going to be multiple? No, it happened last week. They did one and we were good. But there's always, you know, one for safety. So it's probably always at least two. Who is the person on the show that we wouldn't expect it, but they just kill you off camera? They're so funny. Who wouldn't you expect? I don't know. Like, maybe the guy that plays Creed. Like, I don't know that he's going to be, like, really a cut-up. Creed gets in those interview situations and what have you. He's always that character. Yeah, but, I mean, everybody has the ability to be regular people. But, yeah, Creed definitely, if he was in here, he would just have you in the stitches. How many of the people that are on the show, first of all, do you Twitter? I do not. You don't Twitter? I have not gotten, I just got a Facebook account and I'm thinking about getting rid of it. But no, I haven't started to Twitter. My publicist keeps saying, you need to Twitter. Yeah. And I say, well, Twitter for me. Mindy, what's the girl on the show that plays Kelly? Yeah. Mindy, I follow her on Twitter. She's hysterical. I love it. I love it. I love to follow people on Twitter if they do the really funny stuff. How about you, Clark? Do you do any Twitter?

2:46:36I have a Twitter. I'm not very active on there, though. You're not? It's hard for me to figure out. I just don't feel like anybody really could care that much. That I'm drinking a Gatorade. No, I do, though. I don't know why. I find those little things. Even if I have the funniest thing in the world to say about that Gatorade, I just don't see how anybody could care. I'm telling you, for some strange reason. You'd follow me? I would follow you. I'm on there. You're not following. What is your Twitter name? Clark Duke. All right. I'm going to follow you. I'm going to follow you. That's also my real name. I use it for both. If I do get a Twitter, if I do get one, I'll be known as the Black Dragon. Yes. I like it. I think it's going to work for you. Thank you very much. Craig is from Chicago, right? I am. I got some information. And you're from Chicago. And how long did you live there before you moved that town? Well, all my life except for five years in college. I moved out here to L.A. 11 years ago this month. And you knew when you were in Chicago, you said, I'm going to be an actor. At some point, I did. First, it was all about music as I was in college. And then comedy just kept calling me. I was drawn to it. Musical instruments? Yeah, I played piano. Really? Yeah. On the show, very well.

2:47:57Really? Yeah. Did the Dunder Mifflin theme song or the commercial song. Peeper person, peeper peeper. Genius. If you ever want to turn a hotel lobby into a party, this is your man right here. I am. Where'd you live in Chicago, man? Southside. Southside. I went to Loyola U. I went to Loyola University. Oh, run it on. It's been five years up there. I went to Loyola Marymount. Did you? No kidding. Sister schools. I drove past both schools. We're like best friends already. Thank you, Charlie's wearing the Argyle sweater. Yeah, I did. I dressed up for you guys. Clark, are you really BFFs with Michael Cera? Yeah. Are you really? Yeah, we're buddies. Let me tell you. Well, I say that because a lot of us. No, we can't stand each other. Well, a lot of us would like to say that we're BFFs with Michael Cera because he seems like a really fun guy to hang out with. He is. Yeah? How did you guys, did you meet on the set of Superbad or did you know him? No, no. When I was in college, I lived in this apartment building and Mike lived next door to me. Well, you're obviously friends because none of us call him Mike Cera. So that's like Bobby De Niro. It's like Bobby De Niro. It's true. I just call him B, even. That's how close me and De Niro were. Yeah, that is even way closer. So tell me about Mike Serra. Uh-huh. Is he one of those guys that just kills you when you're around him, or is he one of those every once in a while? No, he's pretty much always hysterical, I would say. Yeah? Yeah. And is he that smart guy, that intelligent guy that we see in Youth and Revolt, or is he more laid back?

2:49:23What kind of humor is it? He's pretty sly, you know? Yeah. I don't know. I actually haven't seen you through him yet, so I don't know what we're talking about as far as his character. Your BFF may not like it. Yeah, exactly. Clark. I haven't seen A movie. I haven't seen Avatar. You haven't? I haven't seen it, dude. I haven't been to A movie in, like, months, so it's not... Last movie you saw. Kramer vs. Kramer. I think Inglourious Basterds. That was the last one I saw in theaters. It was good. That was a while ago, though. Avatar spelled backwards is Rotava. Is it? Yes. They should have called it Rotava. Well, I mean, but then you have to play it backwards. Weird. They haven't figured out backwards 3D yet. It's just D3. It's on its way. It's just D3. Hang out, you guys. Hang out. We'll take a quick one and we'll be back. You got it. Of course it's a Pixar song. I love this song. Craig Robinson. Yes. In the studio. Clark Duke. In the studio. That's right. You may know Craig as Daryl on The Office. You may know Clark because he was in the movie Superbad. And he's also in this new movie called Hot Tub Time Machine, which sounds pretty hysterical. And we'll be talking to more of them in just a minute. I have all makeup.

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2:54:43Because swimming pool acid. Fire department's still on the scene. They are in the inspection lane cleaning it up. This report also brought to you by Wawanese Insurance. Better service, lower rates, and dependable coverage. For your auto, home, or your condo, call them 877-WAWA-NESA or go to wawaneseus.com. Great shopping. It can pay off. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego Financial Media Station. The new airtime show. This. is FM 94.9. Craig Robinson and Clark Duke are in the studio. Craig plays Daryl on The Office. And Clark is in a new movie with him called Hot Tub Time Machine, which sounds pretty hysterical, man. It's a winner. Yeah. I mean, the idea of it is that you guys travel back to 1986. In a hot tub. In a hot tub. It's a traveling hot tub. Time traveling. When you guys, how does this work, does an agent go, does your agent go, here's the idea? Or does your agent just go, read this? Or does he explain it to you? Because I'm telling you right now, I can't read. Well, I can read. You're dictated to. Eight pages. I read eight pages of everything. I know what you mean. You're speaking really sexily now. It's like Mary White. What's going on? Talk to me. It just turned nine o'clock.

2:56:32Hot Tub Time Machine. I didn't know it was a comedy. I just read it. And I read it as a dramatic. And I was like, okay, let's see. Let me do my James Lipton and give you Inside the Actors Studio. Because ladies and gentlemen, we're talking to Craig Robinson. Hot Tub Time Machine is about four guys who get in a hot tub and go back to a very specific weekend in 1986. It's specific and it's important for all of us to go back there. May I ask you a question, Craig? Yeah. When you gave the world hot, what was your motivation for it? I'm so glad you asked that question because my motivation was to carry this character through time. And my backstory, in my mind, that you see me play, but you don't know I'm playing it.

2:57:36I actually went to 1985. What is time? So I just kept it. And that's where I stayed. So you think your characters actually traveled through time before? Yes. And just didn't tell the other characters? Yes. Wow. Yes. I had no idea you were playing that. Clark. Yes. What is time? Wow. Well, the current time is 9.02. Beyond that, I don't know. Don't be a fool. What is time? It was Prince's second band he started with, Morris Day. Time. They had hit songs like Wild and Loose. Wild and loose, that's how it's got to be. The only kind of thing appeals to me. Wild and loose, the only life I know. You know, I read that Prince actually, he plays like every instrument on it. Morris Day just does like a...

2:58:41Like overdubs on some of the songs. It's even Prince singing a lot of them. And do you know Prince's alias on that? Jamie Starr. That's awesome. Look at some of those albums. Look at you guys. Produced by Jamie Starr. I love Prince. You guys are into it. Did you know this? Did you? I'm going to ask you. Clark, I bet you didn't know this about your friend Craig. We'll see. Did you know that he used to teach school? I actually had heard that. What grade? Do you know what grades? Like sixth? Sixth grade? Eighth grade girls. Eighth grade. I was close. K through eight. K through eight music, yes. Nice. Ding, ding. Did they love you? Yes, yes. I was the music teacher, so we had a great, great time. What kind of teacher were you? Like the kind that gave homework or like everybody loved because you were so cool? I was a mixture. I did my best teaching when they pissed me off. Really? Yeah, because then I just turned into like this. Military dude. Really? Yeah, but other than that, I was a lot of fun. And, you know, kids take advantage of that. You've taught me a lot. Yeah? Mm-hmm. Like what? Just about life. Yeah. Life lessons. We were up in Vancouver for a few months filming this movie, and there was teachable moments. Yeah. It's true. Sounds like you and I, Mikey. Have I taught you a lot, Woods? Yeah, dude. You're kind of like a father figure. So it's kind of like Craig and Clark, but different? But different.

3:00:10But not as cool. Instead of black and white, it's Mexican and white. Latino. Latino. I'm trying to think of what the color would be. Instead of it being ivory, it'd be... It'd be brown and ivory? That sounds weird. Brown and cream? Brown and cream. It doesn't add up. So here's the deal. Tonight, they're going to be... Tonight, they're going to be the Grand Marshals of the Mardi Gras Parade. And then on March 26th, their movie comes out, and it's called Hot Tub Time Machine. It sounds really funny. It is. It looks great. Thank you. Craig and Clark. You should check out the Red Band trailer online. We looked at it this morning, and John Cusack in there, too. That's going to be pretty cool. Chevy Chase, Kristen Glover. Jessica Paray. And the unequaled Robert Corddry. He's brilliant. He is. He's hysterical. He steals the movie. He really does. He's got the best lines. We all, you know, everybody delivers. But his is just, his character had no rules. It was a really horrible movie. I also watched the, I'm really sorry. What's the one with the curl? He was great in the heartbreak kids. It means you're comfortable. He was also in the Will Ferrell basketball. Semi-pro. He's in that? Yeah.

3:01:28He's really funny. So let me ask you, Craig. Cordy's like Samuel L. Jackson. He's in like every other third movie. Yeah, it looks like him too. Craig, I want to, I got to, because I'm a dork about The Office. Make it happen. I got to ask you some Office stuff before. I'm ready. You go. When you got the call to do The Office, was it a audition or a job offer? It was an audition. I went in, and it just so happened that when I went in to do the audition, Greg Daniels, who's the... who developed the show for American television, had seen this bit I did, and he was impressed with the bit. It's get ready with the button. Uh-oh. No, yeah, yeah. I'm teasing. I'm teasing. Before you say it. Because it's barely ready to hit it again. Somebody's my lady. Right. And it's this bit I did with Jerry Minor. So I went in there, and he was like, that's as funny as it gets. So then we had the confessionals to the camera, whatever they call it. Um, we, we had to read one of those. It's just like a paragraph, you know, do it deadpan. And that's what happened. And I gathered up for that. And they were like, you know, uh, they're doing the show and, uh, and I had seen the original and loved it. The one from the BBC. Right. It's hysterical. Right. So, and then later on, uh, just recently I heard that there was a dependent upon casking, casking, casting.

3:02:56Daryl would have actually been Roy. Really? Yeah, all this other stuff. But it turns out they end up creating this character for me. Really? Yeah, it was really interesting. That's awesome. Tell me what it's like to work around Steve Carell. Is he consummate professional or is he cut up like let's have some fun and do practical jokes? He's consummate professional and he can flick it on and off. Be this normal guy and turn it on. He's hysterical. That's got to be cool. It's crazy to just watch and be a part of that and love the show, be a fan of the show, and be on the show. It's pretty ridiculous. Do you hang out with or call any of them off-set, or is it all an on-set relationship? It's a very personal question. I've hung out with a few people off-set. For the most part, you just kind of go and try to keep your job. Yeah. Try to keep your job. That's awesome. Well, listen, Craig and Clark are going to be the Grand Marshals tonight. The Mardi Gras Parade, downtown San Diego. Their new movie is called Hot Tub Time Machine. It comes out on March 26th. And I'm doing good with time. I'm getting you guys out of here on time. I had to make sure I did that, and I did. Somebody emailed a question for me. What is it? It says,

3:04:21Does he and Patrice O'Neal crack each other up doing taping? And how was it on Shrek 4? Talk to me. Yes. So Patrice cracks me up. He's reading Sienna's email, by the way. What's the answer to that question? And then Shrek 4 is awesome. I guess I'm coming. I'm in Shrek 4 coming out in May. Nice. But yeah, that was an amazing, amazing experience in itself. Just being there and like improvising and having fun. That's cool. But Hot Top Time Machine, March 26th. It looks funny, man. It really does. It looks great. Yeah, I was a little off-put by the title, and then I watched the trailer. I was like, wow. Oh, you're one of those. 100%. Yeah, she is. You have to win her over. Did you say the last movie you saw? Last movie I saw. How? Gosh, I don't remember. They make movies. They don't watch them. Last movie I saw was Hot Top Time Machine. How about that? Yeah, that's true. We saw it last night. Did you? Bam. I had a buddy that was there and said it was hysterical. And he was there last night. That's awesome. Do you trust him? I do. Very much. I like that. Very much. Is he trustworthy? He's very trustworthy. It seems like the coolest job in the world making movies. No doubt. It's not bad. It's up there with like race car driver and... Taro, Taro, Taro. Are they giving it to you? You're on camera right there.

3:05:48I'm looking at it. I'm looking at my face. It's whoopee. It's whoopee. It's awesome. Thank you. Love you. Love you more. Here's what I hear, Clark, that it can also be really boring because you've got to wait in between takes and all that stuff. Do you find that? No, that's very true. It still beats working, right? Yeah, I mean, that's a hard thing to complain about. The in-between stuff? Yeah, but... The actual amount of filming you do because it takes so long to light everything, get everybody there and block it and rehearse it and shoot it. It's like, no, no, I'm just saying. You know, people who want to get into movies who think it's not hard work. You are so wrong. It's more homework than you ever will have. Really? And the hours are really insane compared to most jobs. I mean, like a minimum day is 12 to 14 hours. And the molestations. Rampant sexual harassment. That's the fun part, actually. It's a lot like radio, it sounds like. Exactly. A lot like radio. But it's a great job. This is a weird question. But when you're on the set for The Office, is the food any good?

3:07:04Oh, my God. Is it really good? You actually saw a behind-the-scenes special. Isn't it amazing? It's amazing. It's ridiculously amazing. Like what? Name, what do you want for breakfast right now? I want, let's say. It's like having a genie. All right. But what if you want fried rice? You got it. Done. Fried rice? Whatever you want. Really? Done. And then, like, you. What if you go. In between. It's six hours in between breakfast and lunch, right? And lunch is like a three. coarse gourmet meal. And then between that, you got craft services, which is, you know, snacks that give you whatever, sandwiches, pizza. It's freaking amazing. I'm surprised everybody in Hollywood is not 500 pounds. Really? That's awesome. Clark, would you agree you like the food on a movie? Yeah, I'm kind of jealous. I've been on a show for like three years and the food is not that great. I'm not going to lie to you guys. We have amazing caterers. That sounds like it. What do you get, Clark? It's like a grilled cheese sandwich. I don't get anything. They don't even serve us lunch. They don't even serve us lunch. Really? Yeah. You have to go get your lunch? Like an animal. Yeah. We'll give you 20 minutes. You're right. It's horrible. Now that I hear someone else say it, I realize how ridiculous it is. All right. I have to let you guys out of here because you guys got TV and other stuff you guys got to do. Thanks for having us. Thank you, San Diego. We're fun. We'll see you all tonight. Craig and Clark. Don't go away. More Mikey show next. Sorry.

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3:10:57The moment when you head home to pay loans or continue chasing the sunset. Because balance inquiries, money transfers, and loan payments now only involve texting commands from your cell. So this moment only takes a moment. Mobile banking, new from Navy Federal Credit Union. Learn more at NavyFederal.org. Navy Federal members can now use their cell phones to do banking wherever they go. So now Air Force members can transfer funds on the fly. And DOD folks can get payment alerts while we're at our desks. Well, Navy members can check balances pulling into port. Well, Army members can make payments while we're doing push-ups. Oh, yeah? Marines can transfer funds and make payments while doing one-arm push-ups in the snow. Well, Navy members can check balance. For more information on mobile banking, just visit NavyFederal.org. Federally insured by NCUA. Here's more of the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. It's a Mikey Show. It's making place today, brother. That's right, dude. That's what we're doing, man. That's right. So why is a guy in Ohio living in an igloo? Because he's awesome. What is the deal with that? Well, the guy lost his job about a year ago, and now he's living in his parents' front yard in the igloo that he built. Now, this thing is awesome.

3:13:13Basically. I don't understand. It is a four room ice creation in his family's yard in Aquila, Ohio. And it has six foot ceilings, an entertainment room. There's a flat screen TV up there. And it's plugged in with an extension cord that runs from the outlet in the garage. There's also, you know, cable TV, surround sound, stereo. It's a man cave. This is like the ultimate man cave. It's an ice man cave. That sounds cool. 25-year-old guy chilling in there. Check that out. Literally chilling. Literally chilling in there. Maybe grow up, Peter Pan. Get your job and get your own place. No. Dude, and it's big. Let me see it. It's awesome. It's actually a big thing. We'll go see him this summer. That's right. I am. That's right. Oh, what a loser. No, he has friends over. He's such a loser. He's not a loser. Why? He's got more furniture than I do, actually. He's got more than one chair. Yeah, he does. He has one thing hanging on the wall, and it's a jersey. Of course. That's his problem right there. Loser. Are you ready to do this? You've known them. You've seen them. They may even be you. Woods just points them out. It's time for Dude, You're Dumb. Dude, You're Dumb. Dude, You're Dumb. What are we talking? Well, we got three guys today. All right. First guy is Elevator Guy.

3:14:39There's actually two elevator guys I hate. The one that gets on with you on the first floor, and he pushes the button for floor two. That's me. Hey, Chubbs, maybe take the stairs. That's me. Okay? That's me. Some guy actually apologized for doing that the other day. Of course he did, because he's a moron. I don't even know where the stairs are in this building. You find them. What if you like... To ride the elevator. It's not a ride, pal. It's not a ride. It is. You're not at Disney World. For me, it's a little bit of a ride. I enjoy it. What do you enjoy doing it? The other elevator guy I hate is the guy that gets on and keeps pushing the button for his floor. Relax, pal. You're going to get there. Okay? Dude, you're dumb. That's me, too. Yeah. Click, click, click, click, click. I'm like, wait, did it? Wait, wait. I can't. Is it lighting up? Wait. I hope I don't say, is the other one an elevator thing or no? No. We're done with the elevator. You know what else I do? What? I'm also the elevator guy that walks up outside the elevator before you get in the elevator. Somebody's already pressed the down button, but I walk up and press the down button. I want to go down, and they're like... It's already lit up. I'm obsessive about making sure the button's pushed. Do you guys push the door close button? It doesn't close soon enough, so close. And every time you hit the door close button, it doesn't close.

3:15:53Those buttons don't do anything. Yeah, and you know the other people on the elevator were like, yeah, good one. Nice move. Good work. Usually I push it when I'm on the elevator alone because I don't want anyone else to get off. Yeah, that's true. Hurry up and close. Hurry up. I always do. Can you hit four for me? And it's already been pressed. I do every single time. Can you get three? There's four. There's no cool way to. Yeah, we did that. I like to get off the elevator on the wrong floor. It's just like, hey, I'm getting off. Oh, no. There's no cool way to ask someone to push your floor. Do you think you can push number seven? Can you get seven, pal, please? That's it. That's no way to do it. The next guy is the red light guy. The guy behind you that honks at you right when the light turns green because he's in such a hurry. One second has gone by from red to green and he's... I hate that guy. I will purposely just sit. No, you won't. Yeah, I do. I will sit. Me too. And I will creep. Creep right along. Make him crazy. Dude, you're dumb. I'll slow down and get behind him and do it to him in the next light. Not me. I'm the guy that when they honk the horn, I'm like, oh God, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

3:17:08And my last guy of the day, this is very personal for me because it kept me awake last night. I got bass guy. The guy that still has bass in his truck, like a big fat bass system. Oh, like a subwoofer? Yeah, I was laying in bed last night listening to a neighbor's car bassing the whole time. Again, grow up, Peter Pan. It's time to get the bass and the system out of your car. Maybe they like it. Dude, you're dumb. Yeah, I'm down with that one. I'm out on bass guy. Come on, bass guy. Maybe he was in high school. And it doesn't matter if it's in an apartment or a car. If it moves your rib cage. My chest was shaking. I was laying in bed. I was like. I love it in a minivan. Yeah. It's just such a cool thing. You're calling your dentist today because three crowns popped out. So all you guys, all you dudes, you're all dumb. He's out. And that's it. I'm out. Let's see. Have you guys heard about the Betty White Facebook campaign? Yeah. I love her so much. Apparently people really want to get Betty White on Saturday Night Live. She's 88 years old. I think she's proven herself to everyone. And she's never been a host on SNL. So a man named David Matthews, who is a lifelong fan of Betty's. I said David. No, not Dave Matthews. I said David Matthews. But Dave Matthews is here. Hi, Dave. Hey, Mikey. How you doing? I'm all right.

3:18:29Hey, Wiley's here. Let's get him to play a song. Yeah, we should. Why don't you? Sienna, it actually is me that started that group. Oh, it is? Yes, it is. Well, it says David Matthews. He's a huge fan. I go by David. I didn't know you were a big fan of Betty's. Using your legal name. Betty and I actually go way back. Really? At one night. Really? One crazy drunken night with Betty White. That's weird. That's weird. How long ago? About seven, eight months ago. I was on tour. She came to a show. I was on tour. I was in Florida. You know, she lives in Florida in a retirement home. She came down to the show, and I put her on the list, and she came backstage, and one thing led to another. Really, you went to your manager, and you said, Betty White. Yes. I've always been a huge fan. Nobody said a word. When you put Betty White on the list, nobody said it. What Dave wants, Dave gets. Okay. So you created this Facebook page for her. I did, and I really want her on Saturday Night Live, and I will be the musical guest. Betty White, plus one. There was no plus one. Correct. She brought Sophia. She brought Sophia, right? So I got a little tipsy, and I wound up... Hey, careful, Dave. Well, one thing led to another. Thank you. I get what you're saying. She's a lovely lady. Is this a song you wrote for? No. Oh, okay.

3:19:54Do you want to do a song or anything for her? Yeah. I can. I want to hear about this night with Betty. It's a nice bathroom. You should try shaving. You should try showering, too. Okay. Betty, why do you feel so good when she's in your arms? I'll never forget that night. All the night. with Betty White. So far, it's me. No, it's weird. I can't believe I slept with her. Okay, thank you. That's good. All right, thank you, Dave. That was great. Dave, Betty White, really? That's a one-time thing, Sienna. We'll go back to bed. Well, Betty White has now... Put on some deodorant, will you? Yeah, you stink. Take a shower. Guys, unshaven in a white bath towel singing about Betty White.

3:20:56So this Facebook page has now made its way back to Betty White. Originally, they were asking for 5,000 followers, a campaign towards SNL. Well, they have got thousands of followers. Over 330,000 members of the website have signed a petition to get Betty as the celebrity host on SNL. And she is just amazed by it. She's just so happy. And she says hopefully she can do it. I think she's funny. She would be hilarious. She's super funny. She's really funny in the Super Bowl commercial she did. Now, it's in the paper today, all these home remedies. Who needs amoxicillin if we have oatmeal, right? Why would we possibly need any kind of antibiotic? Some of these are really good. Right? You got one in there. Mr. Home Remedy himself. Are you Mr. Home Remedy, Jay? Absolutely. Like, what do you do? I did a home remedy one time, made me vomit. We just try to stay, you know, it's like every time you go in, they try to give you antibiotics for everything. Who would want antibiotics? Because you build up antibodies, and then what is that going to do the next time around? Right, I mean, that's why there's staph infections and all that kind of stuff. It cures it. That's what it does. The two hippies are like, no medicine ever. I don't need...

3:22:12I don't need aspirin. I've got kelp. Why not try to go natural when possible, though? Why introduce foreign chemicals? Because I know what works. Why introduce foreign chemicals? Yeah. Really, from France and from Bolivia? From Uzbekistan. Yeah, from Uzbekistan. Some of these are not that weird, and they're ones that all of us do for the most part. And I have an answer for the question, by the way, because it works. Because it works. That's why. I feel if I take a Z-Pak. What happens the next time? If I take a Z-Pak, I feel better than I do if I eat. Bark. I smoke a pack a day. You're going to live longer, pal. I'll be dead before you. You know what's funny? You will probably live longer with your pack a day. That's the ironic twist to it all. Keith Richards is 117. He's 109 years old. Don't talk to me and a dad like that. My dad's not that old. Her dad's real name is Keith Richards. I love it so much. But seriously, man, look at Ozzy Osbourne. He's 420. Exactly. He has shoveled cocaine in his mouth for years. I used to snort ants. And urine. Yeah. I would drink urine, and I would snort ants, and every bit of cocaine in the world are still alive today. How do you do it? I do it through doing all this stuff. You got to get used to dirt, man. You're used to it, I know. What's your wife's name again? Sharon!

3:23:36That's what I thought. Ozzy, you don't have to yell it. You can just say it. Sharon! I don't hear you any better if you scream it. You don't have to scream it, darling. Sharon! You guys are a beautiful couple. Thank you so much, man. The reason I live to be 425 years old is from drinking seven cases of alcohol a day. And I'm still alive. You don't drink anymore, though. How do you know what I drink and what I don't drink? I saw an Eat True Hollywood story on you. All right, watch this. Oh. See, that's terrible. You start drinking like a gentleman. That's why. Listen, all this home remedy stuff. They're good. Hold on, I want to hear some. Somebody told me, you don't have to take, this is for real, you don't have to take an antibiotic. Drink apple cider.

3:24:37Yeah. Turn my guts inside out. Really? Seriously, it was like a donkey kicked me in the stomach. You need antibiotics sometimes. I think so, too. See, I'm one that if they give me the antibiotics, I will take them. But there's also some home remedies that I will try first. Like what? Like. Okay. You have a sore throat. You're coughing. There's something going on in your throat. It hurts. What's a home remedy you could do? A cough drop. Lemon and honey. Yes. Or you can gargle with? Salt water. Hot salt water. It doesn't work. It doesn't work. Mikey, I was without health insurance for two years. Me too. The past two years, and I made it work. That worked? Every home remedy that I tried, it worked. Whiskey. What's your best one? Whiskey. Yeah. No, gargling with hot salt water. If you have like a canker sore or something, you do that, kills it. Gone. Next day. Really? Maybe it's a surf. If I have kind of a cold going on and I go surf, all the salt water just blows it out of me. There it is. Unless it's been raining. That's actually a Snapple. Yeah. My dad says everything. Works like a charm. I feel amazing right now.

3:25:42Anyone who surfs says, just get in the salt water. It cures everything. It cures hangovers, that's for sure. It's really great for you. You know why? Because the Mexicans dump their sewage right into that same ocean that you're surfing in. That's why people get such bad infections sometimes. When it rains. When it rains and they got to cut. Ugh! God. Stay out for three days. Well, here's another one. They got the doo-doo infection. If you have allergies or, you know, you get nose nasal congestion. That's me. A good thing to do is, do you have the, what's it called? The neti pot? Yeah, I use it. Now, they say put water in the neti pot and then add some saline solution, which is like eye drops, right? Saline solution. And then you tilt your head over the sink and you pour the neti pot in one nostril mixed with the saline solution. And then you put your head down and let it pour out. Yeah, just take Mucinex. No, it works so much better. Real handsome look. No, it says the saline solution breaks up mucus and thins it all out. I do it every six days. It's natural tears.

3:26:41I do the saline rinse every six days. You really do? Yeah, yeah. You use distilled water and a little pack of salt, and it comes in a little plastic jug, and I stick it in my nostril, and I squeeze it, and it comes out the other nostril. And it helps, though? Yeah, why do you keep doing it, Mikey? I don't think of that as a home remedy. Because it works. It is a home remedy. I mean... It is. I guess you could call that a home remedy. See, Todd, my fiancé, is... Like, it's the worst allergies. He's such a baby about it. So I'm going to try this. Oh, yeah. See, I wouldn't do, I don't like the neti pot. Why? Do you only pour hot water down your nose? No, because the other one works better. The one that I use. The one that I use is like a little, it's called a nasal jet something. You know, it's like a little container. Like a little, I'm having no luck articulating right now. Like the one you use for babies? A little, like, turkey baster guy? Like a squeeze thing? Yeah. It's a squeeze. A turkey baster. No, it's in like a tube. You mean like a turkey baster? Like an afferent thing. I'm pretty sure it's just like a turkey baster. No, it's not even. Have you ever seen a bottle of afferent? Does that look like a turkey baster turkey with afferent? That thing that you squeeze and it sprays up your nose. Why are you yelling at me? I was trying to help Lauren. Why is all of a sudden everyone yelling at me? Like a bottle of afferent, right? Like a turkey baster. Oh my God, for the love of God. So moving on. If you get heartburn.

3:28:07Okay, I'm listening to this. She was messing with you. Lauren was messing with you the whole time. I'm listening to this because it's heartburn. Heartburn or you have like abdominal pain. They say chew gum. Do you mean like a turkey baster? Yeah, exactly like a turkey baster. You just chew gum for one hour three times a day. It doesn't work. Have you tried it? Yeah, I chew gum all the time. You know what I do? Smoke cigarettes. Tums. He's got a bottle of Tums at all times. So here's the deal. So I have heartburn, right? Am I going to chew on a piece of gum for now or am I just going to make it right? The guy eats Tums all day long. Strongest bones in history. How? How is that unhealthy? Because you smoke and you dip and you're taking Tums and you're popping pills. You watch. He will outlive all of us. He probably will. It's weird.

3:29:06There's also the third guy picked in my draft, so I'm not that unhealthy. Is that why you've been wobbling around here? Oh, I'm sore as hell, dude. I'm sore as hell, but I can still bring it. I'm sore as can be. Today's the voice of reason. Chicken soup for the common cold absolutely works. No, it doesn't. It doesn't work. Oh, my God. Salty broth restores electrolytes. Salty broth. And the liquid prevents dehydration. And put a little spice in there. Clean out. So, Jay, I'm sore. What do I need to do? Rub yogurt on my joints? You might try working out more than once a week. You know what? You do want yogurt if you have stomach pains. I ate two this morning. Really? Yogurt for stomach pains? Digestive problems. Maybe you got the number threes. I know what number one is. I know what a number two is. What's a number three? Number two plus two. Yeah. Yogurt just puts good culture back in your system. That's right. Any kind of other infection in the lower area, they say yogurt's good. But not with a bunch of sugar in it. It has to be like the good natural. Yo play. Delicious. 99% fat free. Cranberry juice for urinary infections. Gross. And if you get...

3:30:22Like motion sickness? Girls are the only people in the world that get urinary. Not true. 100%. Cats. Yeah, girls and cats. Can I not speak out to the cats in the world? Mike, that's not true. Cats get them too. Girls and cats are the only organisms on planet Earth to get urinary infections. Give them a little bowl of cranberry juice. Guys get them. Guys get them, just not as prominently. Guys do, right? The last one is if you get motion sickness or nausea, they say take some ginger. Those are so awful. That's why you get ginger at the end of sushi. It's to like, you know, calm your stomach. Keep it from falling down, walking to your car. It's to calm your stomach. That's right. Hey, Woods, you went to Whole Foods yesterday and shopped real healthy. I sure did. You got some chicken breast and some grapes and apples and stuff like that, right? What's up? He's already eaten all of it. Yeah, feasting. Last night for dinner, Lauren had whole wheat pasta and marihuana. Tastes like burnt hair. I know it, dude. Oh, come on. What is it? It's like crunchy. You have to cook it a little longer. Like eight hours longer. It's wheat, bro. It's wheat.

3:31:35Wheat. It's wheat. What? You know the thing, too? What? You know what makes me even crazier is when the food nuts go, oh, you can't even tell the difference. Yes, you can. You can tell the difference. I treat myself, when I go out to eat, they usually don't have whole wheat pasta, so. You treat yourself with a piece of sourdough bread. Like you really cut loose. You know what I mean? It's really cutting loose. Going crazy. Let's see. Sienna, she had a real healthy day, too. It really did. She had a acai bowl. Right? You have the worst time saying that, don't you? I thought it was acai. When I ordered, I always said acai, and then someone said, no, it's acai. So I ordered it yesterday for the first time as acai. How nervous were you? And then I stumbled. I would have vomited. Acai. Can I get this? It's actually pronounced aca-ca. Acai. And then I just pointed at it and said, yeah, this one. Yeah, that one. That's what I would have done. I thought it was a kai berry. She had a real healthy day yesterday, though. She had the acai bowl, which is the fruit and the granola and all that stuff. And then she got home, had some macaroni and cheese with hamburger helper. So that finished the night off with a healthy, real healthy ending. It was the mac and cheese hamburger helper. Delicious. It's delicious. The man loves it. You couldn't give Lauren O'Brien $100 to eat hamburger helper around beef in it. Maybe if it had turkey, ground turkey in it. It didn't.

3:33:00It was delicious. 570-1949 is our phone number. Let's see. Mikey Clark Duke was also in the movie Sex Drive. Funny movie. I wonder why I haven't seen that one. Mikey, my grandpa used to spray WD-40 on sunburns when I was a kid. I've heard that. I've heard that. Oh, wow. Really? It's like Windex. Yeah. We have an aloe vera plant. When I was little, I got burned on a regular basis. And they put the plant on it? Oh, and it stunk, but it worked. It works. Yeah, it works. WD-40 is also really good as an ant killer instead of Raid if you want to use WD-40. You don't kill ants? If I got stung by a bee, my dad would spit his tobacco juice on it. Like the kid. On the bee?

3:33:55No, on me. He had the big chaw. He had the plug tobacco. He'd have a big one in. He'd take it out and he'd put it on. He said, that's sucking the poison out. That's genius. And you probably believed it. No, I wanted to run. Apparently that doesn't work. I've had to hit the button on Woods every day. Three times total. Yeah. No. Okay. Isn't there a cure if you get stung by a jellyfish where somebody has to... Yeah, well... Apparently it's an urban legend. Oh, is that right? It makes it worse, actually. Oh, really? Okay, because I thought that was a true deal. No. Urine. Urine. Yeah. Makes it worse. Yeah. And he can't say it the way that you said it. He's having the hardest time with that. He's having the hardest time with it. You've got to be careful when you're on the running out. I haven't said any F-bombs or anything else. I'm good. Yeah, yet. All I've said is that one thing. I just can't get my arms around it. It's like the most G-rated little slip-up. So, any of you watch the Barbara Walters Oscar deal where she interviews the people that are going to be on the Oscars? No. I don't really care. Surprisingly, no. I like to watch interviews. But she says she's not going to do it anymore.

3:35:09TB. What does that mean? Too bad. Yeah, well, I still would like to see somebody. I don't care if it's her. I just want to see somebody interview Oscar nominees. That's interesting. I would like that as a job. Speaking of Oscar nominees, aren't we on to the movies pretty soon today? I'm hungry. We're going to see Valentine's Day today. And we're going to love it. Especially Lauren. Lauren's dreading it. So Barbara Walters, yeah. Last year doing her special. Oh, wow. This is going to be Barbara Walters last year doing her Oscar special. It's her 30th year doing it. She's done 29 years and it's on March 7th after the Oscars. She's going to be interviewing Sandra Bullock and Monique. Monique. Who's Monique? Lauren, what is Skyping? You don't know what Skyping is? Saving my marriage.

3:36:06What is Skype? You did it yesterday. Yes, I did. And it sounds like, honestly, if you told me about what it was like 10 years ago, I would have been like, and your name is George Shudson. Right. Because that is unbelievable. It's just using two webcams to talk to each other real time to somebody who's thousands and thousands of, well, they could be just, you know, right next to you. They could be four miles away. It doesn't really matter. But yeah, from anywhere, as long as they have an internet connection, and so do you. This has been around for a long time. It's free. It is free. I did it probably four years ago. I thought everybody did. No, I mean, I never did till last week. But it's been around. Yeah, in fact. The cameras have gotten better and better, so it's not like, for years. Is that what it used to be like? Yeah, it used to be like all fuzzy and people cut out. And has Skype technology made that better? No, it's not the Skype technology. I mean, it might be moving faster than it was, but it's the web cameras themselves are that much better. Right. That, like, when I was in Australia and I would talk to Matt, I felt like his head was just on the table in front of me. Yeah. Just talking to me. Yeah. Jamie and I do it every night now. Skyping? Every night. Because, you know, if you buy a Mac, they have a program called iChat. Yeah, it's similar. Is it worse? Better? I don't know. I got weirded out by iChat. I didn't know how to use it. Jamie doesn't have a Mac, so. Don't all have Macs, dude. Who's Jamie? Jamie's my wife.

3:37:33Thanks for the refresher, Radio Pro. I'm just asking the question. Let's get on the phone and recruit some people so I can fillet you. I got you. I got you. Unbelievable. What else? Sienna. Woods, I have to call you out all the time. I hate it. I'm quitting. You do it to me. I'm quitting. This is a marriage, all right? I'm quitting. All right. I quit. I have to take a break. I'm getting a heavy break, so you know. I stopped and told you about a bunch of stuff. Nicole Richie and Joel Madden were married. No, they just have two kids together. Cares? They're not married? No. They are maybe getting married. Woods, you're out on that stuff, right? No, they're getting married. 100%. Two people I could care less about. Oh, I get it. Woods even wants to know about Heidi Montag. Right? Listening to The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. It's important in life to make time for the things that matter. To make time for fun.

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3:43:02was saying that you need a passport in order to go into Mexico. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you hear about that? Yeah, like if you go on a cruise, it used to be that you didn't have to do that. Yeah, no, you never had to. But now they're making an exception for Baja, California, the border at San Ysidro and Otay Mesa. And if you were to go in on a cruise just for one day or anyone going into the country for about one day, you won't need a passport. However, in some areas, so we're not going to have to worry about it if we want to go into Mexico. But for other areas, like people going from Texas or something, they're going to need a passport to go in there if they're going to be visiting for about a week. If me and you went to TJ today, would you eat it? Taco sold from a street vendor? Yeah. You would? Yeah. Me too. 100%. Really? Would you, Woodsy? If you guys would, I would. What if it wasn't? That is very telling about Woodsy, by the way. Well, here's the deal, because you guys have been there before. I haven't. If you guys said they're good, I'd eat them. Let's say it was me and you. We went, and I go, hmm, I've never done this before. What do you think, Woods? I'd say no. You'd say no? Yeah, I'd say no then. How come?

3:44:07Because I don't, there's no basis for me to judge. The trusting of whether or not. But if you're like, hey, there's this really dirty hole in the wall, let's go. But it's great. You'd love it. Lauren O'Brien? If it was vegan. That's a no. No, no. I think I would if the street taco were made of raw potato. No, I'm very impressionable. So if everybody was and it seemed to be like, oh, this is okay, everyone's doing it, I'd probably be like, okay. Plus I don't like to be the pain that's like, we've got to go somewhere special. That philosophy has gotten me in a lot of trouble in my life. I know, me too. A lot of trouble. Me too. Let's go to Mexico right now. I'm in. Somebody needs to take me down there. I haven't been yet. Yeah, if anybody has an armored vehicle that would like to take us down there. They won't let any, like, one of my friends wants to go on her honeymoon there. In TJ? No, down to, like, Cancun. And military are not allowed in Mexico right now. Really? So, like, I can't go to TJ today? You're not in the military. I'm going to Puerto Vallarta for a wedding. You are? Hmm. I'm telling you, man.

3:45:12One time when we were in Dallas, we did a thing where we went, we took a trip to Cancun and I did not. Why didn't I go on that? I don't remember. I love Cancun. Dude, I had a blast. You like Cancun, Jay? I love Cancun. I did too, dude. It's not as bad anymore. It's been really cleaned up in the last, you know, six months. All I remember was drinking milk and I thought it came straight out of the goat's udder. Out of a goat. Yeah. I was like, ugh. It's like sandy. It's like sandy milk. It's disgusting. Unhomogenized. It was like so gamey. I just remember going to a foam party. A foam party and having a freaking blast. I've been to one of those. I don't even know what it is. It's like foam. It's foam. Just floating around. Everyone's partying. You're in a club and there's foam everywhere. It's like a big psychedelic bubble bath. Oh, that sounds like a nightmare. I was 18. Oh, man. You used to go down to, like, TJ for the day, right? Yeah, I was the fat guy that hated to go, acted like I was having fun, wasn't having any fun. Why would you go? Like, to go drinking and stuff? Well, when I was, like, 20, when Eddie and I first came out here, I was, like, 20 years old. I was 20 or maybe 21. I can't remember how old I was, but we came out here, and, you know, Eddie liked to party, and he was, you know, he was a popular guy. Well, I was, like, meh.

3:46:32Did Border Patrol ever give you, like, a hard time when you came back over the border? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Definitely. They were like, are you sure that you are from the United States? No, I've had a lot of friends that are like, even if they're not Mexican. I've done it a thousand times. Really? It's not. Oh, I used to go, like, once every two weeks. Sienna, I think she meant because I'm Hispanic. Well, I know. But Wood said, oh, really? Like, because you can go. I want to go. My friend went a couple weekends ago. Like, he's like, please don't. You can walk across the border. We should go down and get lost here. Puerto Nuevo? No. Can I just say this? Listen, when I was in my late 20s, I went to Puerto Nuevo. I used to get the lobster. Great time. Awesome. Really great food and everything. Now it freaks me out. How far is Puerto Nuevo? About an hour and a half. Now, because Mexico is so violent, doesn't it kind of trip you out? Yeah, well, there's a reason I haven't been in years, you know, because it's not really recommended right now. Jay, we're going this weekend. I have friends that go now, and they have had no hassle, zero hassle. I saw I shouldn't be alive, and people were taken hostage in Mexico. I'm like, ah. For a while, they were going after surfers, Jay. For a while, they were, yeah. It was when the gang wars were at their extreme. Love gang wars. I love gang wars.

3:47:50It almost makes me want to go, though. Now I want to go because you guys are telling me not to. I have tried to say the same thing three times. Mark that. Three times I've tried to say something. Now I want to go. No, it's fine. Go ahead. Over it. We're all waiting on you. Forget it. I'm telling you, man. No, my friend was in TJ a couple weekends ago, and she said that, you know, you remember there used to be the donkeys painted as zebras, and there used to be people with whistles trying to get you to go in the club and go eat in their restaurant. She said she had to search for a place to eat. Really? No one was open. There was no one walking around. She said, you know, a lot of the kids that are trying to sell the gum and stuff, there's a lot less kids out. No more chiclets and all that? No, she got some chiclets. She brought me the canales. I heard about donkeys in Tijuana, but I didn't hear about them being painted as zebras. They are. Okay, Woods. That's enough. That's enough. You're talking about the shows that they have in the clubs. Can't wait. In the clubs. In the clubs. Yeah. With certain donkeys. I gotcha. I think everybody kind of understood. The show that... Right. Thanks. Thank you. Did you say donkeys? Shame.

3:48:54What? I've never seen it. Neither have I. And you're being inappropriate. Well, of course you are. Yes. Fascinated. So tell me about the deal with Kevin James, because I guess. Woods. Woods. Yeah, you had to get to that story. Paul Blart. With seven minutes left. Well, Woods has just signed on to host Nickelodeon's 23rd Annual Kids' Choice Awards in L.A. I don't think you look anything like Paul Blart. Thank you. Go to the website, MikeyShow.com, and now you'll know. Thank you. You'll agree. Sienna can't stop with the Paul Blart jokes with you. That's so weak. You're better looking. Obviously. And you're in better shape. Obviously. And like four feet tall. Barely. Grab a bat, dude. Okay? Grab a bat. You're a taller man. We're going to go make it real right on the diamond. Me and you. Oh, by the way. None. By the way, what is Baltic the Sea Dog? I was pooping you and asked about it. What is that, dude? What is that? Baltic the Sea Dog is only a legend. Have you guys heard about Baltic the Sea Dog? No, not at all. You're gunning. You're gunning. I figured. Because it's like a big thing. All right. Well, this...

3:50:07This dog, this dog was rescued in January 25th of this year. A ship's crew spotted him floating 15 miles from land, trapped on a piece of ice. This dog was just there. Oh, it's a dog? It's a dog. And he was rescued. The rescue was really difficult, and he was shivering, and he kept falling into the icy water. I know, and he was out there for days, this dog. No one knows where he came from, what family lost him. But he was found in Poland, and now one of the crew workers has kind of adopted him. Word has gotten out about this dog, Baltic Sea Dog. I want him. And families have been traveling from the Czech Republic all over thinking that that's their dog, and so far the dog hasn't taken to any of these families. But people are freaking out. They're starting Facebook pages for the dog. Really? Because they love him. They just love this dog. That's awesome. What a great story. It's like Balto. Really? Yeah, why not? Like hundreds and hundreds of emails are coming in every day to the dog. Whatever Lauren's thinking, I'm probably kind of thinking it. Why? Dude, why? It seems like kind of a waste of time. For a dog that was floating on a piece of ice? That's amazing. Can we have a happy story? Yeah. Everybody's going to be so damn cynical all the time. No, listen. I think it's very nice and everything. But I think that what happens is that we sort of...

3:51:24create a cinderella thing around it that is a little more cinderella yeah it's yeah you know floating on a piece of ice in the arctic sea that's not that big a deal you know what i mean like literally like floating it's not that big a deal it happens all the time happens all the time yeah he lived i mean that's not a big deal when you put it like yeah not a big deal you know 15 miles from shore standing on a piece of ice going wow Somebody save me. Please. And he kept falling in the icy water. You don't see that every day. I know you don't, but they could have. Look at this dog. He could have been like a dog at the station and they could have loved him and given him a new home. But like all this hoopla and people flying in from other countries. Like, come on. That's a big deal. Come on. It's a magical dog. Jamie and I would fly halfway around the world to find our dog. There's no question. Without a doubt. There's no question. Oh, I would do anything. And you guys will get to meet two of them. I'm going to bring in Zipper then if you get to bring in your... They're going to be here for five minutes. But if you want to have to be like a child... Are they going to come out to dinner with us? Yeah, they might. They can't come to dinner. No, they're not coming to dinner. Yeah, I think I have an emotional detachment because when I was a kid I was real sad when we lost a dog. So I think you create an emotional detachment. You build a wall around you. Yeah, I did. I did. I built a wall. So now I hear those stories and I'm like, I refuse to go there. It makes my heart...

3:52:47Melt. Really? Love animals. Love animals. What if your cat was found floating on a piece of ice in the Arctic? He could care less if his cat was found in a coyote's mouth in the backyard. Because I was thinking about this morning. I think that because of that, when we lost our dog when I was a little kid, really devastated me, right? Yeah. I really do believe it created, like, this wall for me. Like, you can't get connected to something like that again. Remember? And I was also telling you how I, like, refused to do the thing where I would kiss my wife goodbye. Yeah. Because I can't, if anything were to ever change, it would devastate me. So, like, our cat has been gone for a month and a half. Emotional wall. Is Rebecca upset about it? You know, Rebecca's got like two twins. She's got the twins and Jake and all this stuff that she's got going on. I'm sure she does. But her life is consumed right now with like dealing with the kids and just life. Yeah. And just all that life has thrown at us. It's just lower down on the list. It's lower down on the list. Like I honestly, like I think it's sad.

3:53:54That the cat's gone. You know what, though? My neighbor lost a cat. One day was just gone. Seven months later, it showed up. I hear stuff about cats. Seven months later, it was just back. Middle of the night, she heard it scratching at the door. That's awesome. Yeah. Now, see, there's coyotes everywhere. Yeah. And so, you know. I saw a coyote in a lounge chair at Mike's house. Yeah. I mean, there's a freaking everywhere. You're kidding. Was he, like, smoking a cigar? Yeah. He's sitting there having to smoke. Gazette, you got a light? Hey, pal. Hey, buddy. You feel something neat out here? What are you doing here? He's changing Luke's diaper. Yeah, pretty much. All right, we got to go. Later. Lovely and talented Hillary is up next now. She is in studio today. She is. I thought we were going to cross talk. Now, where is she? Get her in here. She doesn't like us. She doesn't like us? She does, too. She loves us. There's her. Cross talk. Come in. How are you doing? I want to know, how is your husband doing? Oh, yeah. He's hurting a little bit. Is he? Yeah. We went to the beach on Valentine's morning. We had some friends in town with their kids. We took our daughter all into the beach, and he took his surfboard and was like, I'm going to go rip out and catch a couple waves. So he comes walking. I think I saw him out there. I was out there. Yeah, you were out there. Out in the lineup there? Yeah. And he comes walking up, and he's holding his neck, and there's blood. Oh. So scary.

3:55:23So scary. Turns out he broke his jaw. Oh, no. So we spent nine hours in the ER. No way. He went into surgery Sunday night, and his jaw is wired shut for six weeks. No, six weeks? No Frenching for six weeks. Okay, that's the grossest word in the world. It's the grossest word. Can he talk? You can talk like this. Really? He does like outside sales for a living. Oh, no. You know, like any, no, no chunks. My brother, just smoothies. Broth, no chunks. Yeah, broth, no chunks. Greatness. Six weeks. He's going to lose a gajillion pounds. Somebody punch me in the jaw. Right now. Is your daughter scared of him? Is she a little bit like, what's going on? He has a grill. There's so much metal in his mouth. How did it happen? His surfboard, the tail of it, whacked the side of his jaw.

3:56:19And then it cut his neck. He has stitches in his neck. Oh, from the fins? From the fins. Oh. Is he going to surf? Is he going to surf soon? It was pretty big. The waves were pretty big. Yeah, he's going out this afternoon. Are you kidding me? No, I'm kidding. Of course, he's on major painkillers. He's at home in bed. But he'll go. He's one of those guys who'll go in the next two weeks, I guarantee you. He can't because he will. I guarantee you. Yeah, the oral surgeon was like, once your jaw is broken, it's so extremely fragile. Oh, God. See, that's never happened to me while playing on the wireless internet. At your house? It's dangerous, Mikey. Gotta be careful. That's the deal. So, Hillary is coming up next. Hillary, you got a good thing planned out here? All right, cool. All right, well, we're going to do this. We're going to take about a 20-hour break and come back and do it again. All right? We're going to get a 20-hour nap and come back and do it again. And we're going to see Sienna's pick today. We're going to see the movie Valentine's Day. Hillary. Hillary's up next. And we'll be back tomorrow morning at 6 a.m. The Mikey Show's out. Later. Peace.