The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 02/18/10

0:00KBZT San Diego, the Lincoln Financial Media Station, the new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Welcome to the program, everybody. It is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. If you are an M1, we want to hear from you, M1 Nation. Call us right now. 570-1949 is our number. Want to let you know you can also text messages, 949mikey at gmail.com. What is this, our second week on the air? Third. Third week, pal. Third? Fourteenth show. Fourteenth show. Is it really? Yeah. That's awesome. Lucky fourteen. You know what we should do? We should count them. Yeah, for sure. Because I think years from now, it'd be kind of cool to be able to go, yeah, it's our thousandth show. Well, we're at fourteen now. There you go. Give us a call. An M1 is a Mikey Show listener, and that means that you listen exclusively to the Mikey Show. You listen for long periods of time when you call into the Mikey Show.

3:03And you are on the phone. You turn your radio down, get to the point, and you don't cuss. That is an M1 listener. Go to MikeyShow.com and check out all the cool stuff we got there. We got blogs. You can also watch us live on a webcam. We're trying something different today with the webcam. Because a lot of people were saying, you don't do anything. We see you, but you're not doing anything. We do backflips. I mean, apparently, I mean, that may be more entertaining than what we do, which is... Eat. Occasionally eat. Dip snuff. Dip snuff. Speak for yourself. Yeah. Did you get any snuff? I didn't, dude. You didn't toast. Really? You want to bring me a can of Copenhagen Long Cut? I have no idea what you just said. Copenhagen Long Cut. Oh, okay. Somebody needs to make that right. Kid left it on the counter this morning. You need to have extra. I'm losing it already.

4:08It's me jonesing. When we got his laptop, because we bought it together, I said to him, he goes, what else do I need? I go, I would consider getting another power supply. He goes, for what? I go, because you have one at work, you leave there all the time, and then you have one at the house. He goes, waste. You should get a huge case. Last week you forgot. Yeah, a huge case. Keep it in the office. I had to run home. Run home in the morning and get my charger and haul butt back here. Really? I didn't know that. Oh, yeah. He's good, though. He's quick. He made it fast. All right. 570-1949. Give us a call. M1s, we want to hear from you. But anyway, we got one webcam now. And you can see the entire show on the one webcam. I think it's mine. Is it? Yeah. I feel like it's pointed. Directly at me. You're very far away. Good. Yeah, so if you want to see what's happening, just click on Sienna. And that should do it. Is that right? Is that all I do? I just click on Sienna? Yeah. Everybody else, I think, just has pictures up. Okay, cool. Mine's up and running. I'm all alone over here. Aw, poor Jay. So you can actually, yeah, you can see Jay. If you want to, you can click on that one as well.

5:35But it's kind of cool because it's a live shot in the studio and the whole thing, and that's kind of neat. You can watch a live shot of what's going on. Let's see. M1, Big E. What's up? Morning, Mikey. Morning. I just want to tell you guys you're doing a great job. I was a 20-year listener to the TSC, and now that they're gone, I was, like, lost. And you guys came on. They're all just wonderful. You guys are doing a bang-up job. That is so cool, man. Thank you. It's really nice of you, dude. I really appreciate that. I appreciate it. Thank you. You too. You have a good day, too. You too, bud. Let's see. 570-1949. Yeah, with DSC off the air, it means that the choices are even less. And we're hoping that if you were a former Dave Shelley and Chainsaw fan, that you're telling your friends and you're telling everybody to be listening to The Mikey Show.

6:34We want your exclusive listenership. We want to maraud into other shows and steal their listeners. Of course. DSC is an awesome show. They're awesome, man. I mean, the best. I love them. I love them. Dave is somebody that I really have always looked up to, man. I think he's one of the coolest dudes. And a stand-up guy. Just a stand-up dude. Absolutely. 570-1949. 949mikey at gmail.com is how you get a hold of us by text. And, man, we got a lot of stuff to do today. First of all, the Olympics. I T-vote last night. And I don't ever do that. I want to watch it so bad. Real quick introduction. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. I'm 39. Steve Woods is our sports guy. And he is 34 years of age. Yes, sir. And his wife, Jamie, is coming to town today. Today? Yes. He's got a lot of cleaning to do, I think. Oh, I've got so much to do. We have a long meeting after this because I have more laundry than I've ever seen. We'll give you a break. We'll give you a break so you can. Kids got to make it right. You got to make it right. Yep. Lauren O'Brien is our assistant producer. Hi. How are you? I'm doing great. You're wearing a necklace today that is a Gibson guitar pick. I love that. Defender. Defender. And I made it.

8:00You did? Yeah, it's really cute. I know. You have earrings like that too, don't you? Yeah, I made those too. You made that? Yeah. That's kind of impressive. Would you make me one? You really want one? I want a pick neck, like with a, yeah, make it right. But like a long chain, silver. Like a long chain, silver chain with a pick. I have a silver Martin one. I want that. Yeah. I once made pog earrings. You did. What are pogs? What are pogs? I just found out too, Woods. They're way past your time. Sienna, past our time. Oh, yeah. Oh, see, when I was in fifth grade, this was like the thing to do until they got banned at school. But pogs are like little cardboard circles that you used to compete against. And it's hard to explain. But pogs are these little cardboard circles. And you would have a slammer, a heavier circle that you would try to throw onto the cardboard circle, the pog, and flip it over. And if you flipped other people's pogs, you got to take them. I'll bring them in. So you try to collect them, right? Sounds terrible. You try to collect them, and it was fun. It was like Jax when we were little kids, Mike. You ever play Jax? Yeah, Jax. You fall on one on your knee? Right. It's the worst. It's the worst. I went to a 90s party one time, and I was a Pog champion. Really? Because Pogs were really in in the 90s. I'd never heard of it. Weird. I'll wear the earrings tomorrow. Sienna is our gorgeous bride-to-be. Oh, wow. Thanks. 24 years old.

9:19Nine days. You're going to get the countdown every morning. I know. Never been kissed. It's the cutest thing in the world. And then we got Jacef. I've been calling him Jacef for no reason. I like it. I heard you say that this morning, and I thought, is he talking to J? I've always said that in my head. It's the first time I've said it out loud, but I've always in my head called him Jacef. I like it, too. I call my brother Broseph. You do? Yeah. Yeah, why not? So that's J. He's 46, and he's very health conscious. Yeah, that's right. Jay is the man. I mean, every day. He was rigged up this camera. He was climbing on the counter. I was like, dude, it's four in the morning. You are insane. McGrub, dude. Yeah, McGrub will get you. He's awesome. Got the webcam all hooked up so you can watch us on a webcam. And you can call us, 570-1949. This is M1 Party Mix. What up? Hey, what's up? What's going on? I just had a couple questions for you guys. One, what was the name of that song, that Linkin Park song that you played on the intro just now? No More Sorrow, bro. No More Sorrow. Awesome. And another question, I think it's Woodsy. Woodsy. You guys were talking about all the products you used the other day, and I was wondering which one you guys use for the matte, the no-shine face, whatever. Yeah, it's called...

10:39It's skin mattifier, and John Varvatos makes it. Just tried it for the first time today. Did you use it? Yeah. I got it. I got it in the mail yesterday, and I put it on. My wife said, didn't do a thing. Yeah, FYI, you look exactly the same. Where'd you put it? I put it in the T-zone, okay? The T-zone? The T-zone is above the eyebrows. It's your forehead and your, and it's said to put it on your T-zone, your forehead and your nose. You got the John Varvatos one? Yeah, it's called Skin. Skin. It's amazing. Didn't do a thing for me. I'm still shiny. You probably need to give it a few days. You need to use more. Yeah. Really? You probably didn't use enough. How many squirts of that do you put in your hair? Like two or three. Really? Yeah. What's happening right now? I put ten, so I don't know what that tells me. Bizarro world. I have like no makeup every morning. It's two minutes to get ready and you guys are like grooming in the mirror. Must be nice to be pretty. Exactly. It's hard work. No, I wish I put a little makeup on, but I just stopped caring. It's hard work to look this good. Oh, yeah. You do look good, guys. You do. Yeah. It's hard work to still be this. Mediocre. Yeah. Hard work to look this mediocre. You guys look great. Your skin, Mikey. Oh, thank you. It's glowing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

11:52Sure it is. I had the most humiliating conversation yesterday. Another one? Yeah. Yeah, I did with my friend Chanel over at Nordstrom. Oh, Chanel. I hope you had good news this time. No, she's a sweet person. She really is. She's really trying to help me out. It's just that there's not a lot of circuses here in town. Stop. Can provide the clothing that I need for Sienna's. No gray suit? No. Well, what I found out was, is that, what she had told me before, which I misunderstood, was that I thought that there was a gray suit that was available. What she was trying to tell me is, no, just a gray jacket and that size. Humiliating conversation about the lack of 44 smalls in the world. In the world? I guess in the world. There's three of them. There's not a lot of. People like that. If it hadn't been for, you know, the whole issue with being obese, I'd have made a great jockey. But, you know, been a really good jockey had it not been for that weight problem. I've seen guys wear different colored jackets and pants. No, not doing that. But she thinks she found something for me. Oh, good. Good job, Chanel. Very few guys can pull that look off. Really? Very few. One in a hundred. Okay.

13:18Match the suit to the, yeah, match the jacket to the pants. Okay. For sure. Okay. Especially Mikey, since this will be his first suit. I feel so honored that you're buying a suit for the wedding. Well, the thing is, is that here in America, most men are tall. Yeah. And so... I don't think so. She's gone ahead and contacted Tokyo for my suit. Yeah. And it's just great. You'll get there. I finally just got wedding shoes for me, and I'm the bride. The problem is that you didn't have to contact the Nordstrom in China. That's true. That means, no, we don't even have your size here. Try somewhere else. Yeah, why don't you try France, boss? Yeah, what about France? Because, Tatu, I don't try France because... Well, first of all, why do we even have to have this conversation that's a ridiculous conversation? I'm not a little person. You can't borrow one of his suits? Yeah, you can borrow one of mine if you want to. I don't think it'll fit. Why do you not think it will fit, Lauren? You're just a little bit more petite. Oh, I am a little bit more petite? Just a little bit. Yeah, maybe I am a little bit more petite than both. Yeah, he is. He's a little person, Lauren. I like how he calls you boss now.

14:43That's the polite way of saying he's just littler. It's a polite way of saying that Tattoo is or I am. That Tattoo is littler. Oh, thank you. That's very nice of you, Laura. You're welcome, Tattoo. Thank you again, Laura. It's Lauren. You okay? It's Lauren. Something in your throat? That's what I said. I said Laura. Sounds like Laura, though. If I was saying law, I would say law. But I said her name, which is law. Can we just work on it real quick? Lauren. Laura. N. N. N. That's what I said. It's close enough. I'm not hearing it. It's close enough. I hear it perfect. I don't know what you guys are talking about. I sound perfect. So we are, and when I say we, I mean the United States of America, killing it at the Olympics, man. We're doing great. We're doing really good. We are. Tomato was up last night, right? Flying tomato. Red Zeppelin. Yeah, Red Zeppelin, dude. I'll tell you what. It's one of the coolest things I've ever seen. Mikey and I actually watched it at my computer this morning and we were like two little giddy school boys. It was awesome. I was just like, get over here. How does he do it? Awesome, dude. So we had a huge, huge day yesterday.

16:09Let me put it in perspective a little bit. In the 1988 Olympics, we won six medals total. Wow. Which is pretty cool. We won six yesterday. Oh. Yesterday. Oh, wow. We are now leading. We have 14 medals total. The Germans have 10. We have 14. We have 14 total. We have won six yesterday. Nice. You need the Rocky music. I'm telling you, dude. It was. And we're back. I was proud. I was proud. To be an American yesterday. Yeah. So the big story, obviously, is Lindsey Vonn. Lindsey Vonn had the bruised, the contusion on her shin. It was one of the gutsiest performances I've ever seen in sports. The only one I can really liken it to is when Michael Jordan played in the finals and he had the flu. And the literal flu and he collapsed after the game. Yeah. That's what I want. Yes. But what about the gymnast? I forget her name now. That had the broken ankle and she kept going. That was pretty cool, too. Pretty solid, too. Yeah, that's up there. That was Mary Lou Retton. No. No. I think you're thinking of it. It was like Tanya Harding or something. Yeah, why don't I just say names? James Gumm. James Gumm from Silence of the... Yeah, it was me. I remember... Maybe that was it. I got like a 9.5 from the East German judge because he's like the toughest drug. I think it was Carrie Strug.

17:27Yeah, I think it was. Remember Carrie Strug? Yeah, Carrie. And she was like, hey, aye, aye. Remember? She spoke really high. I remember Carrie. So it was an awesome, awesome day. Sean White became only the fifth American to win gold medals in back-to-back winter games. We also got a bronze in the snowboard halfpipe, too. Mr. Delago won that. So it was an awesome, awesome day. Sean White was unbelievable. You know the cool thing about his run, Mike? You probably don't even know this. He locked up the gold with his first run. Then he went out and got a better score his second run on his victory lap. That's crazy, dude. Isn't that awesome? That is crazy. That's crazy. We got some cool audio that we can roll. Now or later? We can do it later. Whatever you want, man. You're the boss. You're the boss. Yeah, Sean White just absolutely did it. It was incredible. Awesome yesterday. He seems like... The most awesome guy to have as a friend. No doubt. He got like 70 feet of air we were watching. I was like, how do you do that? There's just no way a human should be that good. And he's not from the snow. He's from here. He's from Carlsbad. Love it. 23 years old. This is not his last gold medal. That's crazy. Isn't that nuts? When I watch it and I look at it, I go, honestly, if somebody put me on a snowboard right now.

18:53And it was four feet high, the little mogul that I would be on. I don't even know what it's called. It's a little pipe? Ski lift? Bunny slope? I couldn't get on a snowboard and go four feet down a little hill. I couldn't do that. I bet you could. I bet you I could not. You would need a couple lessons. We'll go Thanksgiving when we all go up to Big Bear again. We're not doing that. You know that we're not. That's not the tradition. That's the new tradition. My wife wants to go there every year, but I had to put chains on the car. I'll go with you. And I couldn't do it. And I had to have my friend Rick help me. I still didn't do it right. We'll do it at Big Bear. It turns out you didn't need them at all. I didn't even need them. Such a bummer. We'll go to Big Bear. That was the worst. Don't like it at all. The other big news is Tiger Woods.

19:44He's back. Yeah. He was actually spotted yesterday for the first time in Orlando. He was jogging and hitting some golf balls at a driving range near his house. He quickly headed back home once the photographers spotted him. But word has come out that he is going to speak publicly for the first time since the accident tomorrow. Really? Yes. Since the accident? Yeah, well, since he crashed his car. Yeah, that's the accident. What, Thanksgiving morning? That's how long this guy has waited. I know. Yeah, I thought that too this morning because I had heard it and I thought to myself, man, people don't even realize this happened on Thanksgiving morning. Yeah, so his agent came out and said the tiger plans to discuss his past and his future and he intends to apologize for his behavior. He's going to be speaking to a small group of friends, colleagues, and close associates. Can I go ahead and tell you what he's going to say? Can I? Did he already say he was a sex addict? This is Tiger Woods. I'm really sorry for what I did. And I'm sorry that I hurt my family. And it'll never happen again. Yeah, it's kind of like we know what it's going to be. It's your typical canned. Maybe he'll throw in a twist. Not him. He's like your robot. But I thought he already came out. I almost cried. We might. I almost cried. No way.

21:03But I think a lot of people will chill out once they hear him apologize because he hasn't said anything. I've hurt my family and I really relish the day I can get back to playing professional golf. He's not going to be answering any questions and no word whether his wife Elin will be there or not. She'll be there standing by his side. I guarantee she'll be there. With her $9 million ring on that he just got her. With her boat that he just bought her. There's no doubt. I hope she's not there. I hope she says sayonara. Me too. I don't think that she has said cyanide. No. If she hasn't yet, why would she now? Well, I hope so. I want you guys to stay. I want people to stay married. I don't want them to get divorced. I want them to work it out. Work it out. I don't know, little guy. I don't know. But I will tell you that I think it's a bummer when people have to split up. I don't know if it is. I don't know. You think it would be a bummer if those two split up? Tiger and... Well, you know, all my stuff is biblical. All my stuff is biblical. The Bible says it's the one thing you can get a divorce over. Cheating. Oh, well, yeah, done. You can't. And the recommendation is that you stay married. They don't have any kids, right? Yeah, they do. They have two kids? Didn't know. He was sleeping with a pornography star while she was pregnant. Don't go into rumor. We don't know. It's not rumor. Okay, I just want to say one more time. Why is it not rumor?

22:36Because it's true. It's not. These women say things and we don't know, so let's try to just. You sound like my wife, dude, where my wife is just like, she hears it. Guilty. And I go, babe, how do you know that that chick isn't just saying that so that she can get her name on TV? It's fun to believe. So why would he go to sex addicts camp? Exactly. Well, he obviously did do some things with some women, obviously, but we don't know if it was a pornographer or whatever. Lauren, but doesn't that mean... Because you're right. I think he went to sex camp to save his career. Well, that's what I'm saying. I'm really confused. I thought he already came out and was like, I cheated and I'm addicted to it. Right. He did. No, I don't think he did. He released a statement saying, I apologize to my family for all the stress I put on you for my actions. But he never straight out said, I did that. Right. But I believe that when he says his actions, I think that he means... So it was like ambiguous and then he went to sex camp and we all just drew our conclusion. I think it was sex camp. I believe he went to sex camp because he has an issue with sex addiction. That's what I believe. But obviously if he didn't cheat, he wouldn't need to go to sex camp. Well, yeah. I believe that dude cheats and that he was probably having sex with a lot of women and that he went to.

24:02The sex addiction thing. Now, what I don't necessarily believe is every woman that says that she did it with Tiger Woods. I don't believe it. Woman or a tranny, for that matter? I don't know that I would necessarily go as far as to say that there were trannies involved. I don't know. I'm just going off the pictures I saw. All shapes and sizes were involved in this situation. Yes, they were. But only, you know, none of them were officially confirmed. Either way, it was wrong. And, you know, but every time I hear a new person go, oh, I did too, I think to myself, how do I know you did? What I do know is he probably did it with a lot of people or he wouldn't have gone to sex camp. Where was the sex camp? But I'm not just going to believe every person that's like, I did too. A hundred times. I did. You did with Tiger? Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Breaking news. Breaking news. I'm telling you, it's true. Even Party Girl Jenny, I'm not even sure. I already called you and told you that I did. I know. You guys told me I did. Yeah, but Party Girl Jenny, I can't necessarily know that you did. I can't either. Big Charger player is rumored to be on the trading block, by the way. I mean, this is a big name. A big name. I'm scared. Charger is rumored to be on the trading block. And we got an email that...

25:28Every single dude and every single chick listening right now, you're going to have an opinion on this. You are going to have an opinion on this. Next. You're listening to The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Steve, what are you doing in here? Reading. The book's upside down, honey. Ah, stupid book. So why isn't the TV on? If I watch my favorite sitcom, I miss my favorite history show. If I watch my history show, then I miss the ball game. So you can see my conundrums. So you'd rather just sit here. Fake reading. I'm not. I'm conflicted, Lisa. It's how any TV fan would feel. Steve, with AT&T U-verse, we can record four shows at once on a single DVR. It's one of the reasons we ditched cable. So... So it lets you record four shows at once. Which means... What? Oh, uh... I got nothing. It means you can record your favorite shows while I watch mine. But I... Give me the remote. Fine. I'll read my book. Sure. AT&T U-verse TV lets you record up to four shows at once on a single DVR. And now get $300 back via promotion cards with qualifying services. Call 1-800-ATT-4U, visit an AT&T store, or click att.com slash TV now. Geographic and service restrictions apply. Call or go to uverse.att.com to see if you qualify. Reward redemption required. Offerings 320-2010. For details, visit att.com slash TV details. Attention to all Americans struggling with medical bills and credit card debt.

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31:23like Mezza Corona Pinot Grigio, Irony Pinot Noir, and Louis Martini Chardonnay. Club Bev members, buy one bottle, get the second for just five cents. Wow Mo and Save Mo at BevMo. For a great deal on a freshly made to order walked meal, check out the Dragon Deals value menu at Pickup Sticks. Six delicious meals, only $4.99 each. This report is brought to you by USAA. Find out why USAA has the highest customer retention rate in the auto insurance business. Visit usainsurance.com. Five northbound before truck scale San Clemente checkpoint. An accident. Looks like a car rear-ended a pickup truck. They are stuck together in that number three lane. The 163 southbound before the 15. The road is cleared. There was a green car on the jack in the Gore Point. But they have... cleared that so you should be able to get through without a problem. This report also brought to you by IHOP. You're going to flip for free pancakes at IHOP's National Pancake Day celebration. Get a free short stack of IHOP's buttermilk pancakes only on Tuesday, February 23rd. All donations benefit local charities. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Back to the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. In a minute, Woodsy's going to be telling us about the big charger player that's rumored to be on the trading block. We're going to be reading you this email that you're going to look to.

33:00Is the Tonight Show already in trouble? Hasn't even begun yet. That's what they're saying. Well, yesterday, NBC confirmed that the band leader, Kevin Eubanks, will be leaving the show. Really? Now, he's like the main guy that Jay talks to. Yeah. He's going to be leaving sometime after March, the March premiere. And he wants to try other things, apparently, like start a record, go on tour. And this has caused quite the commotion. He was Jay's band leader, right? Yeah, yeah. He was like his go-to guy at the band. Forever. He's a big deal. Yeah, he's been around for years and years and years. Here's the deal. What? He's not going to get a better gig than what he's got. Yeah. You know what I mean? I think some people might see him on the road, though, like Doc Severinsen. You know what, though? I think that's awesome. Hey, yeah, you want to buy some Doc Severinsen tickets for this weekend, babe? What do you think? Babe, you in on the doc? Yeah. I got sweet tickets to Doc Severinsen. Are you in? Yeah. Your friend's like, you mean docking, dude? Please docking. He was on the Johnny Carson show. Oh, that? And then your friends would be like, that dude's still alive?

34:04Yeah, I don't want to go see him. I don't want to see that, dude. Yes, they do. Hey, Mike, you want to go check out Kevin Eubanks tonight? Hey, there's an audience for us. What if you landed like the golden job like he's had with Jay Leno? I mean, it's an awesome job. He probably makes good money. It's very secure. He's a big part of that show, but he's following his dreams and he wants to go on the road. And I think that's awesome. You know, he has the money and stability to do that now. Then it's great. Do it. Here's the deal. I'm like Kevin Eubanks right now. That'd be like me leaving this and being like, you know what, guys? I think I'm going to go try to make it with that acoustic guitar over there. No, but this is the same thing. You'd be like, are you high, dude? You're never going to get a better gig than this. What if you were real talented, though, man? I am real talented, but I'm not stupid. Write that down. I hope I didn't walk all over that. That's a great clip. Really quick, Kevin Eubanks tweeted because everyone was freaking out about the news yesterday. He said, I'll still be around on the show, but less as of now. I'll tweet when a definite plan is set. You are listening to the music of Kevin Eubanks. I'm not kidding. Yeah, stop it. What if some people like that? I do like it. And it's being interrupted by fake snoring. What?

35:23I have sleep apnea, dude. I'm sorry. Lauren, by the way, makes me crazy because she's fine with that. It's awful. But you play any other, like if you play a song and you're like... Oh, wait, wait. Yeah, yeah. What's this breakdown? I like it. I think my dentist has the CD. Yeah, exactly. It's in an elevator. You're out on this one? Well, all of a sudden I'm in an elevator. Yeah. Really? You weren't in an elevator when I played this one? This is like, this reminds me of like the Peanuts guy. Really? Mm-hmm. What do you mean? I don't know. I can't really hear it because there's some background noise. Yeah, background track of snoring. Well, this is probably the loudest snorer. You have no idea. No, what you're hearing is all of Interstate 8. Listening to this in their car right now. Sounds like an adult film. I want to think that he's going to do good. I think it's awesome that he's doing that. Sienna? What? What kind of adult films does your friend Steve would watch?

36:23If this is what he says it reminds him of. Very subtle and tasteful. Yes, apparently. Documentaries. Sounds like Cinemax at 2 a.m. This is like Deep Thoughts by Steve Woodsey. That's right. That's exactly what it sounds like. Oh, well. Yeah, you probably need to leave that gig and go play jazz. That's what he wants to do, guys. There is plenty of audience for that. Nice knowing you, Kev. Stop. That is cool. I know. I think it's really nice. Smart. Maybe I wouldn't go, but Lauren O'Brien's into smooth jazz. I just said there's an audience for it. All right. Hey, Woodsy. Yes, sir. Who's the big Charger player on the block? That would be one Antonio Cromartie. Get out. Yes, man. There's tears. Antonio Cromartie. Are you guys sad? Dude, number 31. I'll tell you what. Number 31 a couple years ago. It was Pro Bowl caliber, intercepting everything that came his way. Had 10 picks in 07. Yeah, dude. I remember watching him pick off Peyton Manning on Monday Night Football. It was fantastic. Sunday Night Football. Well, they're saying that his lack of physicality and a perceived laissez-faire attitude. Yeah. It's cost him a little favor in the locker room. One team they're looking to trade with. Obviously, they're going to be getting rid of LT.

37:51They need a running back. And they're looking to the Dallas Cowboys, who are super, super deep at running back. They've got Marion Barber to Shard Choice and Felix Jones. So you take any one of those three, you guys are in real good shape. Yeah. And you back one of those dudes up with Darren Sproles, and it looks real nice. And it looks a lot better. And those are young guys. And you guys are pretty set at corner anyway. I think so. The problem is, and I think that this is a deal for A.J. Smith. general manager of the Chargers. I think AJ's looking at it, and he's... AJ is a big character dude. Right. And I think that he's reading the Twitter stuff from Antonio Cromartie, who goes by Crime Time. And maybe AJ's just like, you know what? He's over it. I'm over it. Well, dude, and there's also something that popped up about him. He's late on his child support payments, too. So, I mean, all this stuff kind of snowballs into one. Yeah. See what happens. He's probably going to... I want him to stay. Probably going to be out of here. Keep the talent, please. Well, you know what, though, Sienna? I get it. I get it. A couple years ago is when he looked his best. I know. I mean, I get it. But just hearing LT, then hearing this, it's like, come on. You're already trying to take the Chargers from San Diego. Well.

39:07I feel like Twitter is opening up such a can of worms. Absolutely. For all these athletes. Yeah, and all celebrities were just like, ooh, should have thought about that. Yeah, I think you might be right. We got some fun stories about that later, don't we, Sienna? Oh, wow, there's a good one. Also, Mike, an Australian bobsledder was hospitalized after a crash on the same course. Are you kidding? They killed the loser. No way, dude. Yes, dude. Occurred on the same track where Georgian loser. Died last Friday when he lost control of his sled. I can't pronounce it. I can't pronounce it either. Let me try. Let me try. Okay. It's right here. There's no way. There's no way. I'm bilingual. That's how you pronounce it. Okay. Ready? Wait, which one is it? The long one. Georgian loser? Yes, yes, yes. Oh, the one that passed away? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nodar Kumaritashvili. That was dead on. Oh, really? I should have almost hit the button on what you said. Nodar. Kumarichavili. Yeah, the FCC's on the line. They want to talk to you about what you just said. I'm pronouncing someone's name. I feel like this is like tragic. Dude, figure that thing out. Isn't that crazy? That poor guy lost his life. Now somebody else is crashing at the same area. Do something. We talked in the open about the great day that we had yesterday at the Olympics. And I've got some audio. What do you got? I got Lindsey Vaughn. Emotional. For my whole life. Oh, I'm going for this.

40:35To finally be able to stay in the finish with a gold medal is so awesome. It's amazing. I've given up everything for this. It means everything to me. It's why I work hard. It's why I'm in the gym. My family is here supporting me. It's awesome. I'm beaming right now. You've got to tell me because I don't know. Lindsey Vonn do the deal where you go down real fast and then you jump? No. That's ski jump. She does the one where she goes down at about 80 miles an hour. But there are jumps in there. There are jumps in there, but it's not the long ski jump. Is she going in between flags? It's a wider track than those old flag courses where they're real fast, but it's all about speed. And with her busted leg, doing that was just incredible. She was like doing some stuff on one leg. My wife called me and was like, you got to watch this. And the kid got teary-eyed. It was very, very emotional. And you could hear how emotional she was. Also, the man of the hour, Sean White, won his second gold medal in his mini Olympics. We've got some audio of him talking about basically his victory lap is what it came down to.

41:58Gosh, I was saying earlier, I didn't come all the way out here to hold back anything. And for me, it would be a bit of a disappointment if I didn't stomp that trick. And I remember looking at my coach, and he wasn't saying I'm lazy, but he's saying that I really don't stomp things when I don't need to, and I really didn't need to. And he said, don't do it unless I'm going to stick it. And so I put it down. Dude, he nailed it. I can't even describe it. Very good. I think it's pretty. I think it's pretty amazing when a dude like that has a coach going, you're being lazy. Yeah. That's hardcore. Yeah, it was, like I said, we watched the run this morning. Mikey and I did. He totally didn't have to do this last run. He'd already won the gold, and he went out and got a better score than he did in the first. That's just a champ. It was filthy, man. Wasn't that filthy? Oh, it's just great. You got to see it. It's so cool. It's so cool. Go to, I think, NBCOlympics.com. NBC everything. I know. I've seen him around town a couple times. Have you? He's rad. I mean, there's no question. How did you know it was him? He's the Red Zeppelin. He's hard to miss. The flying tomato Red Zeppelin. Tell me what you think about this. 570-1949, you can call us. Or if you want to text us, you can do that too. 949mikey at gmail.com. M1 Nation, call in about this. If you're an M1, you listen to The Mikey Show exclusively. We are your show of choice.

43:23And you listen for long periods of time. You listen to us exclusively. When you call in, you turn down your radio, get to the point you don't cuss. That's what being an M1 is. Know the rules. We are going to do a sticker strike, man, where we are going to make a sticker. We're going to have a whole deal laid out for you. It's going to be awesome. And get people to come out. We'll get some M1s together, show some support. It's going to be cool. Let me read you this email. You tell me what you think. Says, what up, Mike? You guys are killing it this week. I love all the different opinions on the show, so let me ask you about this one. Love my wife, but she has this thing she does that drives me crazy. Whenever we have company over, she insists on using paper plates. We got married about four years ago and registered for that nice dinnerware. We have all the dishes, and we use them. When it's just us eating. Oh, and we don't use them even when it's just us eating, which makes it stranger, right? I think it's so tacky, and I'm sure our guests agree. I've tried suggesting she stop in the past, and she says it's just easier this way. Goes on using paper plates. A little help here on how to bring this up and not end up in the doghouse. Thanks a ton, M1, Jam Man.

44:46Hey, hon, do you think you could double up on my plates next time? I just cut through the bottom. Yeah, seriously. I don't see a problem with it if it's just the two of them, but when you have company, bust out the good stuff. Step it up. Well, of course, from my standpoint, it's so wasteful. It's so wasteful, and it's like maybe he could turn it into, well, you know we're wasting money. I mean, if she's not very environmentally conscious like I am. at least turn it to the economical standpoint of, like, basically every time we eat, we're just throwing away money. Question. So they're using the regular plates and the regular dishes. They're dirtying them up. Don't they then have to wash them in the dishwasher? Yeah, but at least the water, you know, you can be using that to clean it off. But still. I think it's kind of a lose-lose. Yeah, but there's water. Okay, water's not necessarily. the most sustainable resource because it will run out eventually. But you're going to have trees that you have to cut down every time you use this clay. But we'll be dead and gone by then. Lauren's one of the only people that I know that actually uses the words sustainable resource in a sentence in her life. I know. Most of us don't. I know. But...

46:06People say that all the time. My one friend doesn't recycle because he says it probably wastes more energy to bring the trucks to the place and use all the fossil fuels. That's a good point. You know what I mean? So it's like, I don't know. I'm not versed well enough on it to know the difference. I never thought about that, but that's kind of the same point. How about you, Sienna? I love me a good paper plate. Me too, man. You do? I love them. I hate it. I feel like the food tastes worse. Because of the waste? Because you can taste the pulp in your food. Pulp? Yeah, like from the paper. What are you eating off there? Are you eating like a sandwich off there? Yeah, are your paper plates made out of husk? Paper plates are made out of the pulp of a tree. And you believe. That's what paper is made. Now, I'm fascinated at this moment. I'm fascinated. I want to know, Lauren, are you being facetious or do you really mean it? Okay, let's just talk for a moment. I absolutely believe I can taste it. So you put spaghetti on a paper plate and you eat it. You go, ooh.

47:06I'm getting like a papery taste. Yeah. Woodsy. I have a challenge. I'd like to throw down a challenge. Absolutely. I'd like to throw down a challenge. Dude, yes. A blindfolded challenge. Thank you. Okay. Jay. Make it happen, Jay. Jay. Not today. Maybe we'll do it tomorrow. Next week, maybe? Maybe tomorrow, next week or whatever. But I want to get some spaghetti or whatever. and I want to put it on a plate, and I want to put it on a paper plate. Here's the deal. One of us is going to have to feed her. Yeah, we'll blindfold her. I don't feel comfortable with this. Yeah, because you know you're going to pick them. No, I don't have to feel comfortable having somebody feed me. Matt's going to be like, wait, you're blindfolding and feeding my girlfriend, Matt Lauren's boyfriend? With candlelight? Yeah, with candlelight. He can come in and do it. Let me tell you, you're not going to be able to feed me. There's no way! I'll put my week's salary on it. Okay, well, it has to sit there and marinate for a second on the paper. How long? One minute. I don't know. I've been on today. I just let him sit out until she eats them. One night. How about we leave it on that? We warm it up for you and we let it stay for like three minutes. Yeah. Okay. I'll do it. There is no way. There's no way. Hey, I got a 50-50 shot, so. Fair enough. Anyway, back to this. This guy needs help. It's not about me.

48:29I say. I say if the guy offers to do the dishes afterwards, then he can say, look, I want to serve it on nice plates, but I'll do the dishes. You don't have to worry about it because she's probably the one that has to do the dishes. That's my problem, too. You know what I mean? I'd rather not do the dishes. And she's like, man, I'm not about to clean up this whole party, do all the dishes. Like, they're going to get the paperware because I don't really care. It's tacky. It's kind of tacky. It's totally tacky. It's tacky. I mean, if you're having, like, a birthday party or some sort of shower, then you can use the paper plates. Like a Fourth of July barbecue, maybe? Yeah, yeah. And not even the paper, like those thick plastic ones for, like, a barbecue. Yeah, great. A little kid birthday party, get the SpongeBob plates in the mix. Love them. Yeah, but a dinner party with eight adults? Yeah, no. Come on. Please. Bring out the nice dishware. Get some good stuff going. The silver. Even if you're at home, man. Even if you're at home. Because they said he uses them at home, too. You know what? I made dinner for myself last night, and I ate off a regular plate. Why? I'm proud of you. Yeah. I'm like a big boy. Congratulations. You're not Peter Pan anymore. I have paper plates, and I ate off a regular plate. You're a grown adult. I was a grown man. Do you think it tastes better off of a regular plate? No, I just was in the mood to...

49:44Feel like an adult. And I can answer that question, Lauren. Of course you didn't, because a human being can't tell the difference between eating from a paper plate. Hey, hey, Jay, we can hear you. Jay, you're on the air, buddy. Jay, you're on the air. Jay, Jay. Yes, Jay, Jay. Yes, yes, yes, yes. That's the greatest thing ever. I just had to run it. I'm like, Jay, you're on the air. Whatever. He's dying right now. He's dying. So he is human. He actually bleeds. That's right. That was awesome. I don't know what was more awesome, that or him not dropping an F-bomb. Mikey, show who the F is this. That's how he usually answers the phone. That's right. Oh, Jay, that was so great. That just made my day. Our phone number here if you'd like to talk to Jay. And all of us.

50:44It's 5701949. Jay's in another room. Let's explain this. Jay's in another room. There's glass in the middle, a wall with a window in the middle of us. Mikey stops. He pushes his wheelchair back. His wheelchair? No, wheeled chair. Wheeled wheelchair. Wheeled wheelchair. Wheeled wheelchair. Wheelie chair. I need to get a button you just push down and talk, and then when you let go of it, it comes like this one sticks. Or I got a better idea. Maybe get an intern to answer the phone. And then, oh, we're flailing our arms and Jay has no idea. Jay has, in Jay's defense, I'm looking at right now, he's got three screens that are all going. He's got a phone he's answering. He's downloading audio as we speak. And we're telling him all the bits that we want to do for the next two days. You can look on his camera and see him. And now he's telling us to break. And now he wants us to break. Oh, that was the best. That was rad. Jay. That's fantastic. Love to know your thoughts. So call us. 570-1949 is the number. I've been a laugh about it for like an hour. That's great, man. That was great. Was I screaming too? Yes. You're like, my gang show! So when we come back, we'll take a couple of your calls on this topic.

52:10Is it tacky or is it wasteful or is it, what is it? Eating on paper plates. 949mikey at gmail.com or call us. 570-1949. Also, we're going to be playing a new game when we come back. That's right, baby. And this is a weird, weird story. It's kind of sad. Gary Coleman, I don't know if he was abusing his wife or something, but he was on the set of the TV show The Insider. And pretty gnarly audio of him getting into it with the interviewer from The Insider. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Crossover to Mazda at Bob Baker Mazda, car country, Carlsbad. The exciting Bob Baker Mazda 3 is available with 0% financing and a $500 rebate. for up to 60 months on approved credit. $16.66 per thousand financed excludes Mazda Speed 3, plus an excellent selection of the entire Mazda lineup. Test drive your new Mazda today at BobBakerMazda.com.

53:24Car Country, Carlsbad. Wow, Cesar Gonzalez from Mama Testa Taqueria. Hey, Ryan from the Nervous Records. I wanted to stop in here after hearing Tim Piles talk about Mama Testa. Tell me about your chorizo. Oh, man, let me tell you about my chorizo. We make it fresh every day in the restaurant. We spice it up like only the way Mama knows. We don't use any of that greasy stuff we get at other places. Yeah, it's not greasy. Not greasy at all. My buddy Mark tried them. What'd you think, Mark? I tried the El Pastor tacos. What's up with the pineapple? Let me tell you about the El Pastor tacos, man. We marinate it for 24 hours, and then we grill it with grilled pineapple. Delicious, sweet, sour, spicy, all at the same time. Hey, Brian from the Nervous Records. What are you doing here hanging out with Mark and Caesar? Hey, Tim Piles. We're just eating some food. Really? Are you sure you're not cutting a commercial? No, man, we're just having a conversation. Really? Yeah, are we supposed to be cutting a commercial? I'm a musician. I don't endorse things. Oh, this is awkward. Mamatesta Taqueria, Richmond and University in Hillcrest. Maybe I should write a jingle. Te la lavas. Tail of lava sway! Tail of lava sway! Tail of lava sway!

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58:32pancakes. Only on Tuesday, February 23rd, all donations benefit local charities. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZ2, a Lincoln financial media station. The new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. So I'm calling an audible. We were going to talk about, you know, this paper plate thing. We still can if you want to talk about it. You can call us right now, 570-1949. But I want to respond to Ryan. Who wrote in. Because I thought this was an important email. Says, Mikey, I listened to your show today. Now, he's talking about yesterday when we were talking about the family guy. Yeah. And if you're not, if you don't know, we were talking about the family guy because the show was poking fun of Sarah Palin's son. Sarah Palin's son. Who has Down syndrome. Well, more importantly, they were poking fun at Down syndrome in general. Right.

1:00:09Now, here's what Dude says. Ryan says, I listened to your show today in the 7 o'clock hour on my way to work from the Ramona to Naval Air Station, North Island. You were talking about Family Guy and Sarah Palin. You mentioned you hadn't seen the clip and criticized it for poking fun at the special needs community. You also defended Sarah Palin for protecting slash hiding the fact that she has a child with Down syndrome. Well, I feel that she is using the fact. that she has a child with Down syndrome purely for political reasons. And let me tell you why. She is asking for Rahm Emanuel to step down from the Obama administration for saying the word retard. But it's okay, but is okay with the fact that Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck used the word on their radio broadcast. Seems hypocritical and purely political. I understand her anger against Family Guy.

1:01:07but letting her political ally slide seems wrong. Family Guy is an easy target. They poke fun at every section of society, the black community, the gay community, rich folks, old folks, and the special needs community. That's why I don't watch it. Honestly, I was kind of disappointed when 94.9 made the announcement that you were going to be on in the morning. I enjoyed listening to music on the way to work. I gave your show a chance, but you sealed the deal today. 91X plays enough music like that. I guess I can make the switch. Don't need to listen to a disguised right-wing talking head. It seemed insincere to be critical of the family guy and not point out Sarah Palin's double standard. But, or excuse me, by not calling her out, it only shows you support her double standard as well and you come across as politically biased. And he signs it, Ryan. Well, here's the deal, Ryan. I don't disguise myself as being politically right wing. I outwardly say I'm politically right wing. So lest you thought I was trying to hide it, let me make it perfectly clear. I'm right wing. In fact, if somebody asks me, hey, Mikey, what way do you swing politically? The answer is usually ultra conservative. I don't make any mistake about it. It's where I am.

1:02:39Now, this is what I find interesting, though, Ryan. You say that Sarah Palin was protecting slash hiding the fact. I only say that you say it because in your email you say that I defend that she was protecting slash hiding the fact that she has a kid with Down syndrome. Now, if you phrase it that way, it must mean that you believe that that's exactly what she's doing, protecting or hiding. The guy that called yesterday said that she was hiding it. I said she was protecting it. And the reason that I say that she's protecting it is because she may not have wanted people to make fun of it, which they did on Family Guy. Now, I also find it interesting. I'm going to hit everything he says here. So don't worry. I'm going to hit all the stuff that he says. But I also find it interesting that you say that you don't watch the Family Guy, but you know everything they do on the Family Guy.

1:03:43Now, maybe it's just because you've heard it. I don't know. It may be because you've heard that that's what they do. The other thing I found interesting was that I do know that Rush used the word retard. And I do know that they asked Sarah Palin about it. And when I heard them ask Sarah Palin about it, I didn't get the feeling that she thought it was, quote, OK. Now, if she asked Rahm Emanuel, who's in the Obama administration. to resign for using the word retard, but then said about Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck, it's totally okay, which I haven't heard a clip with her saying that, Ryan. But if what you're saying is true, my response would be, that's a double standard and really messed up. I'm not going to try to defend that. But I haven't heard that, bro. Ryan, I haven't heard that. I haven't heard her say that it's okay.

1:04:47In fact, what I've heard her say is that it isn't okay. Now, in terms of the family guy poking fun at every section of society, the black community, the gay community, rich folks, old folks, special needs, ya, ya, ya. Well, the one that hits me and hurts me is the one about the special needs community. And the reason that it does is because I have a child that's autistic. Now, I want to make something really clear that I didn't make clear yesterday. They have every right in the world to do it. They have every right in the world to do it. I don't have to watch it. I don't. I don't watch it. In fact, that used to be the thing that I used to say when I was doing shock radio back in the day. And I still have the same opinion. I used to do shock radio at night when I was on the other station here in San Diego. I did shock radio in the morning in Dallas. I've done shock radio before. But when I did it, my answer was, if you don't want to listen to it, just don't listen. And that's my answer now. I mean, there's many things that are, like, that's what makes America America. You can listen to and watch whatever you want to. I don't have to watch it. If I don't want to watch it, I just turn the station. Same thing with a Mikey show. You don't want to listen to it. You don't have to.

1:06:17But it's unfair, Ryan. I just have to tell you. And I'm saying this because I suspect that you're listening. I suspect that you're not listening to 91X like you say that you are. I don't believe you. I think that you're insincere. And I think that you're listening right now. And I think that it's unfair to say that I'm playing some sort of double standard like trying to give Sarah a break. Because the truth of the matter is, is that if they were making fun of a Democrat, who had a kid with Down syndrome, I would think that it was just as ghoulish. Absolutely. Because I think that to make fun of Down syndrome is ghoulish. Here, let me tell you a story. I remember one time my wife and I went into an In-N-Out and there was a kid in there that had Down syndrome. And it was difficult for me to be there because my heart hurt so bad.

1:07:21And the reason that it hurt was because I knew that there were human beings that would make fun of him for having Down syndrome. This was before I ever had a kid with autism. And I knew that there would be people that would make fun of him for having Down syndrome. And it hurt my heart so bad knowing it. And the reason is because it's something that I actually admire about the idea of superheroes. protecting innocent people i like that idea the idea of protecting innocent people i i do and i think that um to make fun of disability this is just my opinion i think that there's something especially ghoulish in it that if you're the guy that makes fun of the the kid with down syndrome which by the way i've never been that guy okay and i've been

1:08:34One of the filthiest people that you can imagine. Okay? In fact, I got fired for making an insensitive joke about a kid that had been kidnapped and found okay. Like found alive. Now, leading up to it, I had been saying that they should take the guys that were taking kids and hurting kids. and that they should castrate him. I had been saying something just as insensitive and shocking weeks leading up to that. And when this kid was found alive, I, in my immaturity, thought that it might be funny and salacious to make that joke, to make light of it. At 39 years old, having three kids, I look back on that and go, that was the product of an immature moron. That's who I used to be. An immature moron. But now, having the benefit of having three children, one of which has autism, and based on the way that I've always felt. See, I've never been the dude to make fun of people with disabilities. Because I've always felt so bad for them. And my heart has always hurt for them. And the fact that if they're able to understand, the hurt must be so...

1:10:09It must be so terrible to hurt. I have said a million times in the year, and I'll continue to say this. Anger is not a real emotion. Anger is something that we have that disguises three very real emotions. Hurt, sadness, and fear. And so when we're angry, that's what I believe we are. We're either one of them, two of them, or all three of them. And so... I'm not sure which one of those I hit on with you, Ryan, but I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you angry, but I think it's unfair to paint me as playing this politically. I disagree with you. I don't think that Sarah was not letting the world know about her child with Down syndrome because she was trying to use it for political reasons.

1:11:16If she wasn't, then that means that something else must be true. It means that she must be protecting her child. Because that's what I would be thinking. If I had a kid with Down syndrome and I was a politician, I would be thinking to myself, if I talk about this, am I opening myself up and my child up for pain? Which is what my wife and I talked about. When we were going to be public with the fact that our son has autism. And ultimately, we thought there could be more good that could come from it than bad. Last year, we helped raise a lot of money for Rady Children's, and we want to do that again. And I love my little boy, and I wouldn't want anybody to make fun of it. But they have the right to. I want to say, Seth MacFarlane, he has the right to make fun of anybody he'd like. And I have the right to not like it. And I also have the right to not like it and voice it and say, hey, I don't like it. I think you're a ghoul to do that. And he can go, okay, that's what you think. That's cool.

1:12:20Now, Lauren, you actually watched it yesterday, right? I did. You ended up going home and checking it out. First thing I did. Because some people thought that maybe it wasn't as bad as we thought it was. Yeah, and I started to second guess, you know, and I maintained the whole time yesterday. I'd have to see the whole thing to see what context it was in. But just having heard that 15 seconds or whatever we heard, I knew that the reference was a low blow. Just the reference itself was a low blow, but I didn't know how the character was portrayed the rest of the episode. And just for the record, I'm left-wing. I'm very left-wing. I make fun of Sarah Palin's voice on air. I don't agree with her political views. And I was defending her as a mother and as a human being and as someone who can relate, having a relative that has Down syndrome, having my sister have Down syndrome. But it went so far beyond what I thought it was going to do. Really? Yeah. So it was worse than you thought it was? Oh, yeah. It was so much worse. But, you know, and I blogged all about it. But, you know, I've watched Family Guy for years. I mean, I quote it with my friends as if it were an inside joke, some of the lines in there. And throughout the years, there have been moments where I've cringed and it hasn't personally offended me. But I could see how.

1:13:42You know, if they've made fun of the gay community and they went too far and I cringe it a little bit, but I still watch the show. Yesterday when I saw that and it it just like hit a nerve with me and it personally crossed my line in the sand. I just kind of thought it's not for me anymore. You know, and that's and I'm a comedian. That's what you face with satire. You know, you're going to always be towing the line with what is funny. And what will just offend somebody to the point where they won't think you're funny anymore. And I don't think that he has gone too far this time if you compare it with everything else. Because, you know, he said in a statement where we are an equal opportunity offender or something along those lines. I don't know the exact quote. It's in my blog. But, yeah, he has the right to offend anybody that he wants to. And just saying personally my opinion. Didn't think it was funny. Probably never will. I know I never will think it's funny. There may be a time where Seth decides, yeah, you know what, this ain't for me. I'm going to do something different. I did. I changed, you know, and everybody has their reasons for changing. My personal reason for changing was that Jesus Christ got involved in my life and he kicked some stuff out. He was like, you got to get out of here. And in the beginning, I remember I was like, no, no, no, don't make that leave.

1:15:07And then I was like, oh, OK, it's all right. It can go. But everybody. So everybody's different. Everybody has their own reasons and their own growth. But that's up to the individual. You can do whatever you want to do. Seth can do whatever he wants to do. We don't have to. You know, people don't have to watch it, whatever. And it brings up something really interesting for me, because as being in kind of a comic role on the air, I don't want to offend people either. And if people call and they say, dude, what you said, that was offensive to me. I want to say, hey, I'm sorry, because that's certainly not the point. I don't ever want anything that we're doing to hurt anybody. At the same time, you got to understand that I am never trying to do anything hateful or hurtful. I mean, I lampoon myself with this self-deprecating humor.

1:16:10But everybody has their own sensibilities, and I do not deny him his right to be able to do it. M1 Paparisa? Is it M1 Paparisa? Are you talking to me? Yeah. How do I pronounce the name? This is Paparazzi. I knew you were pronouncing that wrong. It's like, what are you talking about, Mike? It says Paparisa, and I'm like, what is Paparisa? Paparica. I almost said Paparica. I like Paparica. Hi, paparazzi. Good morning. How are you? You had a guest on your show in the past, Stephen Lynch. And I want to use this as an example. There's certain comedians out there that they make fun of every ethnicity, everything. Whether you're fat, skinny. Do you have an issue with a comedy like his? He has songs like Special Ed, for example, where he's making fun of. Somebody's got dropped on their head, basically. It's meant in a joking form, but because of the fact that all of their comedy is like that, do you consider that still funny and less offensive? No, it doesn't make Stephen Lynch any less funny to me. I may not like that bit, because maybe that bit is offensive to me. It's the same thing with what we're doing. I mean, some of you may listen to The Mikey Show.

1:17:34And go, you know, Mikey does the voice of Tattoo. And, you know, my brother's a little person. And, you know, I try not to make it about that. I try to make it more about the voice. You do a good job of that, boss, by the way. If I could hand it to you with that. Thank you, Tattoo. I appreciate that. So even Tattoo is saying. Wait a second, though. There are some people who could have a problem with the fact that I'm no longer alive. That is true. That is true. But, Tattoo, even you have to admit that's not the point when you're in here, is it? No, you're not right, but it is never about that. It is about the fact that I am short and sore of you. That's right, Tattoo. That's what it's about. We are a fun little guy. He loves you. But no, I don't have a problem with Stephen Lynch. You know, Stephen Lynch will do some stuff that I'll think is funny and some stuff that I won't. Doesn't mean that Seth MacFarlane isn't going to have some stuff that isn't even offensive. It's not even the world or the zip code of offensive to anybody. And it can still be funny. Listen, Bill Clinton cheated on his wife. It doesn't mean that he doesn't have good foreign policy when it comes to something else.

1:18:54You know, a man may have a character defect in one area. It doesn't mean that he's not capable of something in another area. It just doesn't discount it. It just means that something may, you know, and if you do discount it, well, then you're discounting it unfairly, I think. Does that answer the question, paparazzi? That makes sense. I hate when people are like, oh, that person is horrible because he makes fun of this. but he makes fun of everybody. No, what I would say is, what I would say is, I don't think that Stephen Lynch should, I don't think it's very nice of Stephen Lynch to poke fun at people that are disabled. I can say that. Now, do I think that Stephen Lynch stinks and you shouldn't buy Stephen Lynch stuff? It's up to you. You can do whatever you want. I got some, listen, there's some Stephen Lynch stuff I think that's hysterical. He's a funny comedian.

1:19:54Well, and Daniel Tosh is one of my favorite comedians out there. And he goes out of his way to offend everybody. And I don't like the bits where he goes after the, you know, people with special needs. But I think the difference with that and the family guy thing for me was they were specifically going after like a two-year-old boy. You know, it wasn't just, you know, a generality statement. It was a specific, you know, he's a child and he can't even speak up. Yeah. To defend himself, so. Yeah, I agree. M1 Froglegs. Hello. How are you? I was just calling because my little brother is, he is handicapped. He has club feet and has cerebral palsy. And so he can't understand or anything. And I just hope that by him that everyone, like, in my class and everything.

1:20:56Because everyone knows about him. I hope that everyone, like, someday they'll learn, like, not to make fun of them, to think twice about what they're doing. Because it hurts your feelings too, doesn't it? Yeah. Everyone in my class, most of the girls in my class and all my friends are, like, good with him, but just a lot of people do that. Yeah, they do. Yeah, they do. Thank you, Froglegs. I appreciate it. That was a really good call. Not a dry eye in here, by the way. Oh, man. I got everybody. Not one. And I can understand that. I mean, at this point, I haven't really experienced that with my son. But one day I know I will. Because I know that there are, you know, not everybody's the same. No, man. Not everybody's the same. But, you know.

1:21:59The good news is, is that they got every right, man. They got every right to do whatever they want to do. And then you got every right to watch it or not watch it. Phone over here, 570-1949. And you can text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. Want to play a new game? I do. We got prizes. And we got a new... It's not really a game. It's more of a... It's kind of a game. It's kind of a topic thing you call in on. Listening to The Mikey Show on FM 94.9.

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1:28:55This report brought to you by SDG&E. Save money and energy by finding out how much it costs to run your home appliances. Visit sdge.com slash winner to download SDG&E's room-by-room energy guide. Looks like the five northbound before the truck scale, San Clemente checkpoint, an accident, a rear-end accident, a pickup truck, and a car have collided. They've moved it over to the right shoulder. CHP on the scene. Should be getting rid of that pretty quickly. Wildcat Canyon out of Lakeside. Southbound at Muth Valley Road, a car down the embankment. Southbound lanes. Still blocked by the fire department and looks like there was nobody in this car. It's unusual that it just like rolled right down the hill. This report brought to you by IHOP. You're going to flip for free pancakes at IHOP's National Pancake Day celebration. Get a free short stack of IHOP's buttermilk pancakes only on Tuesday, February 23rd. All donations benefit the local charities. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Good morning to you. This is Bird from Dragon Eyewear with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Thursday morning, brought to you by Guayaki Yerba Mate. On the cold mornings, you drink it warm. On the hot days, you drink it cool. Whatever you do, you've got to drink it. Good stuff. Surf-wise, today we're looking at a little bit smaller conditions across the board as that northwest dominant swell from yesterday has tapered off. Small west-northwest are backing it up a bit, though. Still seeing waist-chest high waves on average, shoulder-high to head-high to standout spots with maybe a few pluses still eking through.

1:30:23Condition-wise, looking fairly clean. A little bit more overcast today as that lower pressure system starts to move down the coastline. So that warmer temperatures and sunnier skies that we've been seeing over the last, I don't know, four or five days, definitely on the way out. Beach breaks looking to be fairly fun right now as the tide fills in. There's enough crossing the swell for most of them, although structured areas will be better. And I look for the reef breaks to be better at that lower tide. Right now, wind's pretty calm, too. For up-to-the-minute surf reports and forecasts, go to surpline.com. And for everything you need in order to go surf, Check out one of South Coast Surf Shops, five locations, or go online at southcoast.com. This surf report is brought to you by Guayaki Urbamate, and it can only be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. I like what I'm hearing. More of the Mikey Show. Calm down. I got a fever. What? And the only prescription is more. More on FM 94.9. Jay is saying that we are getting some very, very contrasting phone calls, but most of the people are hanging up. That's weird. They don't need to. They don't need to hang up. I think that part of the reason that they're hanging up is because they think that they're not going to get a fair shake, which I understand that because they're not used to the Mikey show. But there are a few phone calls that we're getting.

1:31:56Be more than willing to take them. Our phone number here is 570-1949. And our text message, if you want to get a hold of us by text, is 949mikey at gmail.com. But, Jay, some of the stuff that we're getting. It's funny. Anytime you mention Jesus or God, the calls just pour in. They're like, see? You know, he's a freak. Unbelievable. No, wait, wait, wait. I'm genuinely confused. I'm genuinely confused. So when they say that, what do they mean? I wish they would hang around long enough, but it feels like that they're just waiting for you to say anything that has to do about your faith. And then they're just on it. They're just like, oh, I've been waiting for this. They are. Okay. Well, I can, I mean, I'll respond to it. I think that a little bit of that may be a perception thing. Okay. And maybe the perception is that I am a guy. Who will shove it down your throat, which I don't like the shoving down the throat. Not a fan of the shoving down the throat. What I am a fan of is just letting you know what's happened in my life. Now, if you meet somebody and if anybody wants to call in about that, I'm more than willing to talk to you about it because it may be that the perception is just wrong. But if you meet somebody, let's say you meet somebody and you like them.

1:33:22You know, you get along with them, you think they're a pretty nice guy, and they make you laugh. Well, if you find out that they are Christian, wouldn't it be weird if you said, ooh, I don't like you anymore? Very. Just like it would be weird if I met a guy, and he was Buddhist, and I didn't like him anymore. You know, that would be strange to me. Well, not only strange, but that wouldn't be fair. Woodsy. I read a lot of the I'm a big Facebooker and and I read a lot of the boards and stuff. And it's funny because this is our our 14th show together. And I think the one thing I read all the time is Mikey is the ultra conservative Jesus freak. And it's it's kind of sticks in my craw a little bit because you're there for people when they need you. And if they need you, they can come to you and you do a lot of stuff for a lot of people that you never talk about.

1:34:23I'll talk about it. You do a lot of stuff for a lot of people, myself included. I think you may have mentioned God three, four times since we've been on the air. A Jesus freak, I'm using my quote fingers, it would be a lot more. It's not like you're a minister, okay? And it doesn't bother me, and it shouldn't bother anybody that you want to talk about your faith. Your faith pulled you from the depths of hell. And in a lot of cases in my life, it's been the same thing. So, you know, I'm a believer. I'm a Christian. I love Jesus. I love God, too. So I guess that now the boards will light up. Woods is a Jesus freak. Real quick, too. I was having some trouble in my marriage. I reached out to Mikey. Mikey then took time out of his day to reach out to my wife to send her some verses and some scriptures, which have helped bond us together. My wife is coming here today to visit. And really, it's more of, hey, this is where you're going to be living now. We've decided to make our marriage work. A lot of it has to do with the scriptures that Mikey sent. A lot of it has to do with us being open and honest with each other. So for that, I thank you. Oh, man. Thank you, bro. You know, real quick with it, because it's been... See, I've been at another station for...

1:35:48Well, I was there actually 14 years, but doing mornings at another station for many, many years. And so it was very unusual. And maybe I was naive when I learned that some people were really upset at me for my beliefs. Now, I am ultra conservative for sure. I am ultra conservative. And if you're ultra liberal, that's cool. That's fine. I mean, you have the right to be just like I got a right to be. ultra conservative yeah lauren is ultra liberal as we sit across the table from each other yeah and they're so close and amazingly we don't hate each other no we actually it's really weird having an open mind and getting along right it's odd but here's the uh here's the thing woodsy's right uh i don't necessarily i don't push my faith out there uh too much and the reason that i don't is it's not really appropriate and b i wasn't really hired for that reason right

1:36:50What I was hired to do is, first of all, to put together a cast of the most amazingly talented people in the world, which is the people that are sitting across from me in the room next to me. And the other deal is that I was hired to compel you. And what that means is, and my way of doing it mostly is humor. I really like to, you know, so where, but what I want you to know more than anything is, is that the Mikey show is not always. Just about the yuck yucks. Sometimes it's going to be you're going to know us like your friends. And part of the way that you know us like your friends is you just get to know us. And every day you either decide that you want to spend time with these friends or you don't want to spend time with your friends. But I mention it the same way that I would mention my son. You know, I mention it in the same way that I would mention my son. Nello, are you there? Yeah. Hi, Nello. I'm kind of pissed off that you're playing ultra-religious talk on the radio because I like having my own views and it's pretty much not cool. But I have my own views and we're sitting across from each other. We can't put that... I wish you wouldn't have said the curse word. I wish you wouldn't have said the curse word, Nello, because we could have talked. Man. Nello said the curse word.

1:38:22I didn't hear it. What'd she say? I didn't hear anything. I think, I mean... She said it's kind of... F? Yeah. I think, speaking from a lot of people, from a lot of the comments that I read and stuff... And like you said, you know, we're not just a talk show that does the yuck yucks, but I think that's what a big population of them want to hear. And I think that when it gets really serious, a lot of people do get turned off by that. And I think whether it has to do with your religion or not, I don't really think that's an issue. I think it's just they want to hear laughter while they're waking up and going to work. And that's fine. And we do do that for the most part. But there's also times where serious discussions should be talked about amongst it. Just like. with your friends yeah i mean exactly we're letting you know all of us inside and out i mean putting our heart on the line telling you our beliefs and our opinions and everyone's a right to has a right to their own opinion so i mean please like mikey said if you don't believe what he's saying call we want to talk to you what's funny to me the funniest thing to me is i probably read more than i should and what i and lauren too um what we read is is there's two opinions right

1:39:32One is they're not serious enough. I don't need to listen to inane conversations about current events all day. And then it's when we do talk about something serious, it's I want to leave that behind, man. I want to hear some funny stuff. And it's like my mom told me when I was a little kid, you're never going to make 100 percent of the people happy 100 percent of the time. It is impossible to do. It's impossible. Yeah. So somebody is going to cry if you talk about God. Then they're going to cry if you talk about. what to get your mate on Valentine's Day. Right. So it's kind of like I get really passionate about it, and it kind of makes me want to beat my head against the wall. I also think that's not something that we should be complaining about, though. No, it's not. I think that that's something that we're very lucky to be in the situation we're in. No doubt. And everyone has a right to their own opinion. If people don't agree with something, please tell us. You're doing the right thing by telling us. We want to know. We want to make everyone happy. But like Wood said, it is impossible to make everyone happy. But not all of us even agree with each other. Pretty much on anything. And we don't share all the same views politically, faith-wise, on stuff like what to get your Valentine. From a very fundamental level to a very specific situational level. We don't. And I wouldn't be on the show if I felt like this was going to be a forum for Mikey to shove his beliefs down my throat. You don't. And it wouldn't work.

1:41:00If I did, you know, I mean, it's just that's not what I'm hired to do. And and I don't. What I do tell you, just like all of us on the show, we tell you about our lives. We'll tell you about, you know, we'll tell you about our lives. Everything. Renee, are you there? Yes, I am. Go ahead. Oh, oh, hi. Sorry. Yes. Oh, sorry. It's all right. comment that I actually think it's Sarah Palin's fault for the comment, and I'm a born-again Christian, and while I agree, you know, I appreciate the, you know, your faith being on air, I can also understand that, you know, God would want us to express our faith and show others by our actions, and perhaps our words, but maybe not always throw it down our, you know, everybody's throat if they don't believe that way. But my main opinion was about Sarah Palin. I totally think it was her fault. You have a child with severe needs. She needs to stay home and take care of that child. That was her primary job. God gave her that child for a reason, and it was not to become vice president. And if it was, then she needed to bring it out because then she could take a stance on that. So you're saying that she can't do both? She can't take care of her child and also be a politician?

1:42:26I am saying that if you have a child, that is your primary responsibility. And I know I'm going to step on a lot of people's toes because while I do work, I gave up my own career to stay home with my children. Now, am I financially wealthy? No. I have debt beyond my eyeballs. But I know that when God gave me these children, that was my primary goal. And I don't understand why. people will have the children and not willing to sacrifice for them. Well, here's what I find interesting, Renee, is it seems like when you first called, your point with me was that I can believe how I believe, but I shouldn't be telling anybody else to believe that way, right? No, no, no, that's not what I said. Oh, okay. What I said was that I don't, I think there's a point in which it can turn people off. That was my, That's not my original reason why I called, but I kind of was listening to the conversation. Yeah, well, Renee, here's the thing. Here's the thing. Clearly, it does turn people off. But what I was trying to be clear about was that there may be a misperception that I am different with my faith than I actually am, which is fair. Maybe they thought something that just isn't true. And maybe what they thought was that I'm jamming it down anybody's throat.

1:43:49This is the first time we've talked about this, by the way, which I'm really kind of glad it came up because I want to. And, you know, if anybody's listening and they kind of felt that way, like, hey, you don't need to be talking about that. I don't like I don't screen out the bad ones. I don't screen out any calls. I'll take whoever's calling and whatever. And I mean, I've had some people personally ask me that, you know, does. You know, I've heard that Mikey's really religious and does he talk about it all the time? And is he trying to convert you and all this stuff? And my response obviously was no. But, I mean, you do your testimony for like the last 10 minutes of the show on Friday. So that's the most that you'll talk about it. And that gives people an opportunity to, okay, I've heard the whole week. I've heard the whole show. I can tune out now if I choose to, if I feel like. This particular portion does not apply to me. Yeah. And the thing with the testimony that hits home for me is, I mean, I've been in a lot of those situations that Mikey was in. And for me, it's about God, but it's just more about Mikey being able to turn his life around.

1:45:10Through through the help of of Jesus and religion and finding something in himself that has made him the great father and boss and husband that he is today. And if you don't like it, if it's not your belief, it wasn't always my belief. OK, but that is the way that it is. And if you don't like it, you don't have to listen to that. M1 Mark, are you there? Yeah, I'm here. How are you doing, Mikey? Good, man. You know, I think it's great, you know, that you've changed your life around, you know. But, you know, I'm new to your guys' show. You know, I used to listen to the DSC. But, you know, I talked to a lot of people that used to listen to you even, like, before you were born again, you know, back on the Mikey show on Rock 105. And they're always saying to me, I don't like the Mikey show anymore because, you know, ever since he did, you know, get born again, I just, you know, he's different in the fact that, you know, he won't talk about certain issues or this or this or that, you know, whatever. And, you know, I just, it kind of made me at first, you know, not want to listen to you. But, you know, then again, I could care less because, you know, I mean, just like, you know, I don't remember the girl's name that's on the show with you, but she kind of said it too. You know, people just will, you know, they'll complain about everything. And it's like, you know, you don't like it, don't listen. Yeah, and here's the deal. The person that you talk to, they are totally within their right to say,

1:46:37Yeah, I don't like to listen to the Mikey show because he used to be this way and now he's this way. That's OK, because they're right. I did used to be a certain way. I did used to have certain kind of content that I don't have anymore. And just so you know, the Mikey show was extraordinarily successful. A number one rated program, largely in part because of the changes that I made in the show. We don't do rumor. We don't do gossip. We don't do the TNA. We don't do this. I just I don't do that stuff. And, you know, but I still think that the show is compelling and funny and interesting. I do. Well, you know, it's funny because I'm not really religious. I consider myself spiritual, you know, but. Everything that you guys have to say about religion, you know, God, Jesus, whatever, it never bugs me. And I always tell that to people that say that about you. I'm like, dude, you know, are you that uptight that you can't hear somebody's opinion about something and take it for your own? Well, you know, one of the interesting things is, and I was telling Jay this. Jay and I were talking about this one time off the air about a week ago. And I think that what it is is the same kind of thing when you go to a doctor and they hit your kneecap with a little mallet and you get the reflex that makes your...

1:47:57Leg jump up. At some point in somebody's life, they've been to the sports arena when some dodo is holding up a sign that says, you're going to burn in hell and blah, blah, blah. Some dum-dum is out there with a sign that says, you're going to burn in hell. And I don't believe that that is helping anybody. In fact, what that's doing is turning people off. In my opinion, I think that's turning people off. Maybe they've had success with that. But I don't do that. What I can tell you is, you know, what's happened in my life. That's all I can tell you. And I do say what's happened in my life. And by the way, it's the biggest thing in my life. It's the biggest part of my life. And to tell you the truth, for the most part, like Woodsy said, I don't really talk about it too much. Rarely.

1:49:02And off the air, rarely. Rarely. Yeah, I mean, I talk about my son Jake, too. I talk about my wife, Rebecca. I talk about our twins, Luke and Ryan. We talk about the old days. We talk about the old Mikey, too. I mean, it's not something like I've hidden and I've overcome all this. I'm not going to talk about the person that I was before. Right. We talk about it all the time. And it certainly isn't. And you better do this. Yeah, you have to do this. M1Chad. Chad, are you there? Yeah, how's it going, Mikey? Good, man. Hey, yeah, I've been listening about six, seven years now, about when I made a change in my life to stop using. And you did a big influence on me, and I appreciate you talking about your experiences. But I'm what you would call a pre-believer. I know I want to believe. I look at other people that believe, and I look at you, and they handle things much better than I do. Life tends to be a little bit more difficult for me. Maybe it's jealousy. Maybe it's something else. But I don't get it. I just want to say something real quick about that. Now, this is Chad, right? Yeah. Chad, I want to say something about this. And I don't want, I hope. Uh-oh. And I hope this doesn't upset anybody. It will. I'm going to say words that sound religious. Oh, no. But, Chad, I want you to know.

1:50:28That on my own strength and power, I was not able to become different. I was not able to become different on my own strength and power. In fact, when I was using coke, meth, when I was an alcoholic, all of those different things that I had going on in my life, all of those different things, I tried stopping or filling all these different areas of loneliness and low self-esteem and all that stuff. I tried filling all those things with everything you could possibly think of. And what happened was all the changes that have happened to me are not a result of my own power. They have been a result of God living inside me. And all the changes that I've made, and you could ask my wife, she'll tell you, yeah, he's different. He's different.

1:51:29was uh was crying and she said i wish that you had done something when luke was crying and i was so convicted about it that well first of all i immediately apologized to her and then this morning i wrote her an email and i said uh babe i'm so sorry about that please forgive me and i love you and i want to make sure i'm doing that in the future And then I burned her a CD that she wanted me to burn her for a long time to try to make up for it. And I also added a couple of other songs on there that I hope she likes. And I put it on the kitchen island and said, I love you. Because I wanted her to recognize a couple of the songs. Oh, you didn't want to give her anything good. OK, I got it. So but that is not of my that's not my own power. And Chad. Go to MikeyShow.com and write me an email. All right, man. Well, I was just going to make the point that as a listener that's a pre-believer, your testimonials I can kind of prepare myself for. I've listened to them every once in a while to try to make that change in my life or to help me make that change. What I'm making, the people that are kind of getting frustrated with this, I myself, we don't understand. We don't get it. And so what I was saying was it's kind of like put it in perspective for you.

1:52:49It's kind of like if you have a friend that went to Harvard or Yale, and they bring it up once or twice a week, you know, oh, yeah, I learned this at Harvard, blah, blah, blah. And you just kind of go, you know, really? Every time with the Harvard? Every time with Yale? I mean, you see what he's saying, right? I think I do. What he's saying is he's had a lot of the same situations as you. He wants the help, but... You are the lucky one that got the help. It's not as easy for other people because they haven't had God come into their life. I really like this analogy. I really like this analogy. You know why I like it, Chad? Maybe if somebody went to Harvard, I would look at them and I would say to myself, I wish I was as affluent as you are and I wish that I could go to Harvard. I wish that I could have been able to do that. You're the lucky one. You were able to go. And what I want to let you know, Chad, is that what happened with me is available to you. But he's tried to find it. And a lot of people have tried, but they haven't had that strong connection that you've had. And that's what he's trying to say. Go to MikeyShow.com and I'll give you directions on how to get to Harvard. All right, man. I'm not kidding. You'll get there, man. I'm not kidding. I mean, if you're going.

1:53:58I just want to let people because that's a great analogy. I love that analogy. You know, already with a Harvard dude like I know we got a break. I'm not going to already with a Harvard stuff, dude. I mean, come on. I've heard it already. And and you know what? I'm kind of irritated about it because I can't afford to go to Harvard. I can't go to Harvard. Yes, you can. You can. You can. And if you go to Mikey show dot com, I'll help you with that. Now, I'm only saying that I don't. say that on the air. All those years I was on the air at Rock 105, I don't know that I ever had a conversation like this one exactly, where I'm going, yeah, you can go find out, blah, blah, blah. I don't. That was one of the best analogies. And I mean, absolutely. When he said that, it hit me. Exactly. Of course, there's people that want to be where you are, but they can't get there. And they feel like they haven't gotten that help that you did get. Yeah. And nothing strong enough has come over them. And so that's what he's trying to get to. And it's like, I can't get to Harvard. I can't. No one's, you know, I'm not getting in. The difference is, is that in one, you can't be accepted. Like, maybe you can't get in there. Maybe you're not. Your grades aren't good enough. Yeah. For this one, you can. You can. All right.

1:55:11And I just want to say one more thing, Mike. We talked about the Sarah Palin thing yesterday, and I didn't get to get this in. I don't want you to change it all, man. I mean, I love hearing about your son. You know, when I was getting nervous about, you know, having a daughter and everything like that, I mean, listening to you talk about your situation, it made me feel like no matter how my daughter came out or whatever, you know, health-wise my daughter might have, that, you know, listening to you talk gave me the strength to prepare for something like that. And I appreciate everything you talk about, but I'm just trying to put in perspective why people get frustrated when somebody gets Jesus or when somebody gets a Christian faith. It's frustrating to those that don't, and that's where this is all coming from. I understand it completely, and I'd love to help you, Chad. All right. You take care, Mikey. Thank you, brother. I loved that. That was interesting. 570-1949. We are going to change gears. We really are going to play the game now. We'll do it next. This is The Mikey Show, FM 94.9.

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2:00:29As our founders said over 80 years ago, cars are driven by people. The guiding principle behind everything we make at Volvo, therefore, is and must remain safety. This principle, to build beautifully designed cars that protect you and the ones you love, still holds true. In fact, we are so confident in the cars we put on the road today that we now have a best-in-class coverage plan to protect you from unplanned expenses. It's called the Volvo Safe and Sound Coverage Plan. It provides five years of warranty. Five years of factory scheduled maintenance, five years of wear and tear coverage, and five years of roadside assistance. This means next to no cost to you for the first five years of ownership, and it's complimentary with every new Volvo. Volvo, the brand you can trust, has now made the cost of owning the car as safe as the cars we build. There's more to life than a Volvo. That's why you drive one. This report is brought to you by Firestone Complete Auto Care. You need that extra value from your car and Firestone Complete Auto Care can help. Right now, buy three Firestone Affinity touring tires. You'll get one free. Call 1-800-LOCATE-US for the Firestone Complete Auto Care nearest you. Claremont Mesa Boulevard, Genesee Avenue. There's an accident involving a pedestrian, a car and a pedestrian. Ambulance is on the scene. Also, La Mesa on the 94 westbound before Lemon Grove. We've got a large truck tire and a bunch of tread. It's in the slow lanes. In El Cajon, the 120.

2:01:4825 ramp to Grossmont College Drive. It's a car on that off-ramp that apparently is stuck. This report also brought to you by AutoZone. Now at AutoZone, get a 5-plus quart oil change jug or 5 quarts of castor oil GTX motor oil and an STP filter, just $16.99. Restrictions and details are at your store. Get to AutoZone today. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego, Lincoln Financial Media Station, the new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Hearing the General Lee make us feel better? A little bit. How can it not? It's the General Lee, for crying out loud. Give me my favorite drop. Which one? You know which one. And you're being inappropriate. I know what it is. Think Toyota. Think another country. Exactly. Kills me. Woodsy loves the Nagado saw. Amazing. That's a great drop. It is. All right, let's see.

2:03:33570-1949 is our phone number. 949mikey at gmail.com is how you can get a hold of us by text. And I'm getting a lot of text messages that say, Mikey, I want to go to Harvard. Go to mikeyshow.com. There's a little video you can watch on my website in the help section. I think that Chad pointed out something that so many people have wanted to say, but it's a hard thing to say, and it's a hard thing. to say that makes sense, and he did it perfectly. Hey, I think I have a better one, though, for you, Sienna. What's up? Instead of Harvard, it's like I lost a lot of weight, and the way that I did it doesn't cost anything. Yeah. It's free. Yeah. God forbid you talk about that. Well, I mean, I'm not angry about it. You know, it's a deal where I just go, hey, I lost a lot of weight, and I want to tell you how I lost the weight, and it's free. Anyone who wants help can go and do it. You're not making anyone do anything. Yeah.

2:04:32Yeah, I'm not at all, you know. But anyway, I said to Jay because Jay came in. I go, dude, what's up? Where's the calls? He goes, dude, nobody will stay on the line. Because I couldn't get anybody that wanted to stay on the line. Weird. Or they were cussing or whatever, and we can't put that on the air. Well, now we need people on the line because we're going to play a game. That's right. Oh, baby, you just got caught cheating on your girl. Come on, San Diego. Call up and tell the world about your pocket dial. You ever pocket dialed somebody? Of course. Your cell phone's in your pocket, or are you ladies? Your cell phone's in your purse. Or you, your cell phone's in your man purse. I don't have a man. Are you sure? I carry a computer in it. It's in your fanny pack.

2:05:37Woodsy is so elite because he carries his computer in a backpack. That's right, dude. I like the Merce, Mike. Weird that Sienna likes it because I have something different. I'm getting rid of it. What? It's not functional. It's going to be the third one I get. I don't even know. Is that it right there? It's completely unfunctional. You need a briefcase. I like guys that have a briefcase. Really? Can you picture Mikey with a breather? No. Please. I do. I already get grief from Sienna every day. Every day I eat my lunch. This is what Sienna says to me every day when I eat my lunch. There's the lunch pail. Every day. Well, it's so cute. It's a little igloo cooler. There's nothing more emasculating. And then what's in the lunch pail? Crackers, cookies. How dare you? Doritos. Doritos. Some cake. And who made your lunch? A cupcake. Your wife. Yeah. My lovely wife, Rebecca. I only say it because I'm jealous. I know. Of my pail? Yes. Construction workers have pails. It's cool, man. I want the old school one with a thermos in it. Mm-hmm. God, I love that. I used to have an Aladdin one. What's the worst part? Ew! Was that you? Wow. I hit the button. You turned your mic off and I still heard that? And I still heard it. I heard it. My goodness. It was an accident.

2:07:04James Gumm just threw up. Even James Gumm, the villain from The Silence of the Lambs, was like, that's like the grossest thing ever. Did you really hear that? A guy that makes a robe out of human skin is like, you're so gross. You're the grossest person I've ever seen in my life. It's because he's drinking a Coke. I hit the button, dude. All right, so here's the deal. You've had your phone in your pocket and you called somebody accidentally. and they heard something really gnarly. Or your phone rang, you picked it up, hello, and you hear something crazy. It's called a pocket dial. So what happened? What did you hear? What happened? What did you do? I've done it, but there's usually nothing salacious. I got one the other night from my friend, and he was arguing with his wife. It was the best. I listened to the whole thing. She was like, babe, what do you want for dinner night? He's like, Maybe like chicken or something. And she's like, well, I don't really feel like making chicken. What about this? And he's like, why are you going to ask me what I want if you're not going to make it? You got to hear that? Yes. And I started dying. And she's like, well, I'm sorry. Like, we don't have any chicken. I love that. Are your friends seven? No. That's awesome. My friend Matt, he's in Arizona. I love it. I love him. I wish that there was like a tape record feature.

2:08:32When that happens. There is. There is? Yeah, some phones have that. The voice recorder. You could tape it? Maybe not when the call is going on. Oh, that would be awesome if you could. No way. No way? That would be awkward. Have you ever done it? I've gone both ways. What happened? Whoa. Well, I have. Woods, can you please get the entire burrito that's sitting on your bottom lip off of your bottom lip? Woods is like the sneakiest eater when we're on the air. He's like, not sneaky though. I'm a mess today. I'm an absolute 100% wreck. Is it because your wife is coming in? Yeah. Okay. Let me lay it down. I've got about 15 loads of laundry to do. Okay. My wife's coming in today. We haven't really seen each other in about a month and a half. I don't have any Copenhagen right now. I'm dying. I got the shakes from tobacco withdrawal. We're on the seventh floor, so he can't just go outside on a commercial. I'm about to eat a cigarette at the next break. Have you ever done that? No, I'm losing my mind. I'm starting to sweat. Could you ever take the tobacco out of a cigarette and put it in your lip? No. Would you ever consider quitting smoking and chewing tobacco? Never.

2:09:50Mikey, I'm thinking about quitting this job so that I can go have a cigarette first. Can I talk about what's in Woods' crack den today? Yes. It's expanding. It's starting. It's spewing over. It's spewing into my space. Well, okay. Thank you. He's got... Oh, no. He's removing it. Wait, wait, wait. He's got so much stuff. Lauren, it's so funny because Lauren is Claire from the Breakfast Club. Yeah, and I'm Bender. Yeah, and so the two of them sit next to each other, and she's got her area. Absolutely perfect and clean. No, it's not perfect. It's pretty perfect. It's close to perfect. But yeah, he's got this Coke can. Well, he's moving it now, so I can't talk about. Chewed up highlighters from not having a cigarette, so needing that oral fixation. Almond Joy, Breath Mints, Nivea Men's Hand Cream, a Snapple, a bottled water. A Coke. He's got his phone, three pens, a lighter. For no cigarettes. Tums, a backpack. Burrito. Keys. Flossers. Tums are far stretching. A pint of Old Harper. Dude, what are you, Bear Grylls? If you find yourself on the seventh floor of the Booze Hamilton building, sometimes you've got to make do with what you've got. Right now, what I have is...

2:11:14A Snapple, a Coca-Cola, men's hand cream, a half-done thing of water, chewed-up highlighters, a receipt for no random reason, every disgusting piece of metal. Dude. And an Almond Joy. And an Almond Joy. You must be so hard to clean up after. You have no idea. Your poor wife. You have no idea. But he's like a magician because with one fell swoop, he'll like... Swipe his arm across his entire crack den and be like, all right, I'm out. I know. And I take it off the air, Lorne and I are like up. 20 minutes packing everything. Woods is out the second the mic turns off. You know how I do it? Your backpack. I open the backpack when I go. And I scrub everything into there. I'm so jealous of all your thunder space right now. All of us have to share an inch. Well, you know what? It was in my contract. Maybe you should have negotiated a little better. I have like 15 piles of paper that I have to deal with. I negotiated. More space than everybody else. That's right. Master negotiator. You got it. I just went for money. That's right. I did too. I told them to keep their money. I want the space. M1 Lizzie. Hey, guys. What is it? Not much. Just calling to give you a story about Butt Island. Yeah, that's right. What happened to you? Probably about 10 years or so ago, my ex-husband, now ex-husband, went to a strip club with a bunch of his friends.

2:12:36While they were in said strip club, decided to butt dial me and my best friend, who was also husband, was with the... Maybe the greatest butt dial ever? Wow. So we got to sit there and listen to probably about a good 20, 25 minutes of our husbands at the time. Are those real? Oh, I don't think I'd want to hear that. Wow. That's really crazy. They came home, and we questioned them about it, and they were like, no, we went to a movie. Oh, my God. Did it sound like this? Like you... Oh, hey, big boy. This is basically... Yeah, that's what it sounded like. You wanna dance? Ooh, yeah, you look good tonight. Yeah, I know I'm wearing... Wait, wait, wait. You turned me off. Well, yeah, because you're chewing a burrito. I got it. You're chewing a burrito. I lost the joke. Thanks for killing my whole momentum. I told you I'm a wreck today. Just a wreck. Lizzie, is that what you heard? Did you hear like the music? Yeah, we heard the music. We heard them all screaming and yelling. Take it off! You hear them going, yeah, this was for my wife. God rest her soul. I can't take it off yet. I'm at a change. Go get some more ones.

2:13:59So we had to be mad at them for a little while. And then, you know, they were totally caught. So they couldn't really walk their way out of it. Thank you, Lizzie. I love how they got the setup. Like, so what'd you guys do? They knew exactly what they did. We want to see if they're going to lie. Of course. Just like a woman. 570-1949. Testing. 949mikey at gmail.com. That's so bad. So, Mikey, can I talk about how I went both ways? Yeah. I got distracted because of the crackdown. Yes. One, I was caught, well, I was singing in my car. Not the best singer. What were you singing? I don't know. Be honest. I don't remember. No, I honestly don't remember. Something really bad. Who did you call? I called a co-worker's voicemail. And I was just like.

2:14:55Going on and on and on. I know my face is like matching my shirt right now. I'm turning bright red. You called a co-worker's voicemail? Yeah, at the office. And so the next day he's like playing it. And I was like, you have to. Like I made him promise to delete it. Because I was like, oh my gosh. He's like, no, no, I have to. And he's like crying listening to it. Awesome. I was so embarrassed. You don't remember what you were singing? It was probably like something like Shania Twain that I would like never admit to missing to. And I was like, I don't. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I know. And then the time that you got it. Then the other time, I heard one of my friends accidentally called, and it was her and her husband talking about, like, we had all just hung out and everything was great, and then talking about, like, well, you know, the thing about her is, and I just had to, like, I didn't want to hear it. You're crazy. I couldn't do it. Oh, I wouldn't. It was one of those, like, very intimate moments where you're like,

2:15:55you know, sometimes you've been about somebody, but then you really feel bad about it. And I was like, I just had to take it for that. And I was like, her might not even have been me, but don't want to hear it. I know somebody that did that. They lost their friendship because they were talking to somebody and they were like, and she as thou. I called my old boss in a cab at one 30 in the morning. I'm a mistake. I'm a mistake. I still have no idea what I said or what was heard. Of course not. I just saw, and I didn't even, I looked through my phone log because, you know, when you wake up in the morning, you're like, what happened? She or he? It was a she. It was a she? Yeah. And she didn't tell you what you said? Uh-uh. This was like not a boss that I would talk to on the phone. It was just, I had the number. It was the worst number to call. So you saw? That I called, and I never brought it up. And she never brought it up. That's awesome. Wow. You got lucky, kid. Yeah. I wonder what you said. I have been wondering for years. Oh, my gosh. 570-1949. M1 Woody, are you there? Is this Woody? No. Let's try this one. M1 Vladimir. Hey, what's going on, guys? Good morning to you. What's up? Hey, I actually had a couple of incidents, but I'm going to tell you about this one.

2:17:12I was training on the job with somebody. He stuck me with this girl. Very beautiful lady, but very flirtatious. Yeah. Oh, that's terrible. He's complaining. He's like, stuck me with her. Right? I had my earpiece in. Yeah? On my phone, I had one of those old candy bar Nokia's. And, you know, I had one of those. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Pause. Sienna, what is it? It's one of those bigger Nokia phones that had, like, No, it's not like that. It's bigger. Once he just picked up a mounds bar and started talking into it. The Nokia and it had like a little mini antenna that stuck up. It was like, oh, what thickness? Like a Zach Morris phone? No, no, no. I'm trying to remember. It was just like, what? Once he's a filthy, filthy person. I said, what thickness? And he said, easy. His head is going to explode. How old are you? 12. 16. So, anyway, what happened, Vladimir? Well, she just started flirting with me. I told her I was, you know, very devoted to my wife. She gave me the story of how she actually got a guy to cheat on his girlfriend. Why do these women exist? And she went, like, really elaborate into the whole story. And I'm starting to sweat. And she's like, I'll bet you I can get you to cheat on your wife. Oh, my God. Wow. Dirty little minks.

2:18:37And she's like, if you tell me I can, I'm going to try. Oh, my gosh. I didn't know what to say. Can you pause for a moment, Vladimir? I am so upset. The two women in this studio. Who says that? I don't know. But Lauren and Sienna got looks on their faces right now like they wanted to kill that girl. I'm not a violent person, but I would hit her. Wow. So, Vladimir, oh, my gosh. That just made every woman listening crazy. Because every woman just went. Short trip. They just thought of their men, and they thought of, what if a chick said that to my dude? Yeah. And she was hot. Yeah. Yeah. I would be so uncomfortable. So, Vladimir, what happened? Who did you call a mistake? I didn't have, well, my wife's number got dialed up. Oh, dude. Here's what happened. We started talking about that, and I told her, I'm not going to say that you can't do it, because if I say you can't do it, then. I'm just going to say, please don't try. I love my wife, and I don't even want to take a chance of you trying to mess with me. And I changed it to something else. I think I changed it to, like, church and a concert we were doing that weekend or something like that. The moment I changed it to a different subject, I must have put my hand on my pant leg or something, trying to wipe the foot off my palm, I guess. But it automatically dialed my wife's number.

2:19:59Oh, wow. Later on that afternoon, she's like, hey, I got your voice message. And I was like, what voice message are you talking about? She's like, well, you called me up. You must have been at work. And I just started sweating out my head. Oh, my gosh. And she played the message, and it occurred right after. Wow. Vladimir. Vladimir. Be real with me for a second. What was that? Yeah, go ahead. There's not one thing you said that maybe pushed this little minx to say anything like that? One thing maybe your wife would be upset about? One little thing? We just kind of started introducing ourselves to each other. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Sienna's kind of got a point. I can't imagine some girl just being like, I'm going to get you to cheat on your wife. Happens to me all the time. I've done it before and I'll do it again. Yeah, you're like, hi, my name's Vladimir. Hi, my name is Cynthia. Anyway, I can get you to cheat on your wife. Take your pants off. If you want to take your clothes off, you look good. You want to get crazy? Let me elaborate. We were just talking about...

2:21:02Just each other. We had to introduce ourselves to each other. First time I met this girl, and we started talking, and she was bisexual. And I was like, okay, I don't understand that. How did you find that out? How did you find that out? Because he goes, hey, are you any chance bisexual? Trust me, if you had met this woman, my wife even met this woman, and she's just very outgoing. Female me. Huh? He's like a female Woods. The girl was like a female Woods. He's drinking the coke. Well, she had a better tan and she doesn't chew. So, yeah. Better tan. I really, it's been years. It's been, we were first married. This has been at least eight years ago when this happened. So, I'll be honest. I don't, I don't know if I said something to her. It's completely possible. Are you sharp? I wasn't trying to hit on her, I promise you. Well, it sounds like she was the aggressor, so maybe he didn't. There's girls like that out there. Did you accidentally swipe her chest? Just on accident. Hey, listen. There are women out there like that for sure. There are, there are. I believe him. It's sad. Woodsy, have you had those women? Yes. Really? Absolutely. Like what? Like crazily, sexually forward women? Yeah, all the time. Not all the time, but back in the day.

2:22:23Lauren, why are you saying... You're like, oh, that's all I am. I just come on to men like crazy. No, no, no. Just my ex-boyfriend was seduced by one himself. Really? Mm-hmm. And I met her... At like the company Christmas party. Yeah. And right away I was like, mm-mm, mm-mm. She is, something's not wrong. He's like, you're crazy. You're crazy. Six months later, guess who's not crazy? Yep. There's only been a couple of women where my wife goes, mm-mm. Sienna and Lauren. Yeah, Sienna and Lauren. No. My honey has nothing to worry about. What are you trying to say, Mike? Yeah. There's only been a couple of women in my life where Rebecca goes, uh-uh. Yes, women's intuition is never wrong. They get a vibe. I'm kind of inclined to be with Woodsy on that one. What? Really? Yeah, because you know what I think? I think sometimes you guys are wrong and you're just, you got your thing going on. And you're catty. You don't like something. And here's what you do. Here's what you do, too, when you do that. Just like your boy. This is my favorite personality trait about myself. Hey, Woods. Or like my wife would say, hey, honey.

2:23:40I don't like her. There's something about her I don't like. And then in my mind, I'm like, hmm. I was just going to say that. What is up with her? I was going to say, sometimes I'll get that feeling and I want to say something. And sometimes I do, but I don't most of the time because I'm putting that thought in his mind and he'd never even thought of it. Absolutely. And I'm like, what's up? And he's like, oh, she's kind of cute. Yeah, she's kind of dirty hot. And it's like, maybe, ooh, maybe I do. What? And it's just like, don't even put the thought in their head. They're not going to do it. If you know your guy, he's not going to do it. When Rebecca has done that, I've not thought, ooh. I'm going to get me some action now. Well, no, that's not what they think either. But I'll just tell you from my perspective, from my perspective, it's like I think in my head, you got it wrong, honey. I'm telling you, you got it wrong. No. I'm really perceptive on people in general. I have to say that is a gift that I have. But my women's intuition has never steered me wrong. Oh, boy. Never.

2:24:43But Lauren. Never. Lauren. Never. That's what Rebecca would say. Rebecca would say the same thing. Never. Scary. And I agree with Lauren, but for my own sanity, I'm just going to say, you know, it's going to steer me wrong sometimes. Or else you're just going to be like, I'm never wrong. I'm never wrong. I know it, you know, and you're going to dwell. You'd be like a typical woman then. I bet you're wrong 75% of the time. No, my crazy head has steered me wrong, but my women's intuition. Never. You have a handsome. See, that's the thing. It would be one thing if I were a six foot three, you know, Josh Duhamel, you know. But when my wife has said that, I'm like, are you talking to me? Also a very. public figure. That's true, Mike. It doesn't matter sometimes. Right, right, right. Sienna, you can see me right now, right? Yes. I didn't put on invisible juice. Well, look at your wife. You have a beautiful wife. I do. You ever see Angus Young? I tricked her. I'm telling you, I tricked her. You ever see Angus Young from ACDC? That's true. He's the power of the mic. That's right. Yeah, right. All right, so here's the deal. Ellen DeGeneres had Tracy Morgan on her show and she pranked him because he's afraid of sharks and she had a dude dress up like...

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2:28:44Where can you possibly use that? At the mall. But that's the only place, right? No, in the cities. On the streets, in the cities. I've seen them cruising around the sidewalks downtown La Jolla. You have? Of course I have. That takes confidence. Yes, and I admire it. There was one at the food court the other day. I got out of their way. That's a mall. I saw that person too. Like if you're capable of doing that around town. Or 85 years old. Or 85. And I got 77-year-old parents that are like, that's a little nerdy for me. But hey, listen, to each their own, you know. You want a segue? Meep. Meep. 1-800-777-4AIS. They'll get you dialed in. And if you do get a great deal, call us here and let us know about it at 570-1949. We'd love to talk to you if you've called AIS and saved money. Check engine. So many things can go wrong with your car. That's why Pep Boys invented one place that can make them all right. Check tires. Right now, it's the Pep Boys Presidential Tire Event.

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2:33:43Mama testa taqueria. Authentic Mexican food. Richmond and University in Hillcrest. If I can be Bobby Flay, I can surely blow your mind. Come in and let me put some Mexican in you. Dios mio, what have I done? This report is brought to you by AutoZone. And now at AutoZone, you can get a five-plus quart oil, change jug, or five quarts of castor oil, GTX motor oil, and an STP filter, just $16.99. Restrictions and details are at your store. Get to AutoZone today. As you travel through this morning in San Marcos North, Rancho Santa Fe Road, the ramp to the 78, an accident on the right shoulder. It's an SUV and a car. Tow trucks are on the scene. Could be a second collision in that same area with three other cars. Olive Street at Sweetwater Road, an accident here in National City. It's a two-car accident. They are waiting on tow trucks here. a stall on the 805 northbound before Balboa Avenue. They just cleared that it was in the number two lane, so you might have a little bit of slowing as you approach. This report also brought to you by IHOP. You're going to flip for free pancakes at IHOP's National Pancake Day celebration. Get a free short stack of IHOP's buttermilk pancakes only on Tuesday, February 23rd. All these donations will benefit the local charities. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. More of the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. I love them.

2:35:45I love him, too. I love him, too. I love him, too. Our program director, Garrett, he can talk your ear off, but he's the best. He's awesome. But I have to train myself because I can talk a lot, too. The two of you together? The two of us together, we can sit there for five hours, and I'm like, okay, we've got to stop talking. Somebody wrap it up. You know what I mean? That's good. Very good. I got it. He said, somebody wrap it up. You don't get it? Wrap it up, pal. Oh, right, right. The piece. Yeah, your piece. Sausage. The piece. Wrap up your piece. Let's see here. What do I got for you? Oh, you're going to like this. So, Ellen DeGeneres has Tracy Morgan on the show. And I don't know if you knew this. He is rumored to be starring in a remake of a very big movie. and they were talking about it, and she played a little practical joke on him at the end of it, which, by the way, it's kind of short at the end. You don't really get to hear too much of it at the end, but you know for sure it's genuine. She didn't stage this. Here you go. Is this a true rumor that they're going to remake Jaws and you're going to play the lead in Jaws, the captain of the ship? No, I don't want to play the captain. I want to play Quinn.

2:37:14Really? I want to play the guy that gets eaten by the shark, Quinn. Why? Because that guy, his character was awesome. Yeah. He was like that guy. But I also want to remake Day of the Dolphins. Because you remember that movie with George C. Scott? No. Yeah, it was cool. You got to check it out. You're just scared of sharks, and that's why you're trying to get away from sharks. No, actually, I own like three of them. You do? Are they big? What did he say? You got me! Wasn't someone in a suit? Why would a shark just be walking around? No, I think it just... Ellen always does this thing where people are scared or something. Or she just likes to scare people in general. So people will be dressed up as a giant mustard bottle just for no reason. Walking out and then they sneak up from behind so the entire audience can see this. And then they just go...

2:38:12Like to Julia Roberts, you know? I hate getting scared. I hate it. You know what is so funny to me is that watching people get scared is one of the funniest things. I know. Why is it? Why do we find it so funny? I don't know. I'll give you another one. I'll give you another one. So when Rebecca and I stayed at the hotel over the weekend for Valentine's Day, We had gotten a massage. And when we got a massage, they massaged the bottom of my feet. I love that. They massaged the bottom of my feet, and they put this lotion, oil, stuff, whatever, right? Shut it. So we came back to the room, and I'm laying in bed. We ordered some room service, okay? And the door, somebody knocks at the door with the room service, and I get up to get it. And as I do, I've got the stuff on the bottom of my feet. Yes. And I slip. But I don't slip like completely like the fall. I do one of these. I do kind of a... Oh, like one foot gets out from under you. She laughed.

2:39:13So hard. It's the best. It's the best. Like, laughed uncontrolled, like embarrassing, like she couldn't even catch her breath. And all I did was just kind of trip, you know? It's the best, too. I've never seen you trip or, like, spill anything or anything. It would be amazing. So I think the fact that it was you, it's like, yes! Well, you know what else? I mean, think about it this way. You guys know her, Miss Demure, right? Yeah. She's got it together. My wife is, if you haven't met in a while, my wife is very proper. And she's very, you know, like this. Composed. Very composed. Great word. She went to UC San Marcos. And she also, just so you know about her, she's a type that, unlike me, if there's any attention focused on her at all, she's coming out of her skin, right? She's coming out of her skin. She was walking across the street when she went to UC San Marcos with her friend Lori. I love it already. I do too. And as she stepped off the curb, caught her shoe. And she had books. She had books like, she had books like, like a stack of books, like eight books. And she said, not only did she fall, but when she fell, the books went flying in the air. Like they, I mean, like from a movie, like flying in the air. And she did like sprawl, like hands out sprawl. And she said her friend Lori laughed, laughed,

2:40:39So hard that Lori said she almost whizzed. Yeah. Woodsy? I've got one. You got one? I have one, too. I was on campus, and it was the freshman year. We rode our bikes to class. Yeah. And because traffic and parking was a beating, so we all got mountain bikes and we all rode to class. I had the biggest crush on a girl in one of my classes named Kelly Kevron was her name. Amazing. Oh, no. So I'm riding across campus, and I'm riding, and I see her walking towards me. And I see this smile kind of come across her face like, oh, there's Woodsy. And I'm riding and I give her, and I got a turn to go away. And I give her the hand, like the hands up. So you're going to pull up to her and like do a turn? No, I'm turning off to go to another direction. So I'm just going to give her like a cool wave. How you doing? How you doing? Oh, wow. My hand hits a stop sign that makes the loudest noise. I can't even like. Bang! And the thing shimmied and shook after it. She and her friend looked at me like I was an idiot. I was like, hey, and it just goes, bing, like that. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. And, of course, I had one hand on the bike.

2:41:49So my bike starts to shimmy and shake and my legs fall off the seat and I'm like trying to catch myself. The thing about Rebecca's fall is that at least someone else was with her. It's worse when you're alone. You're right. I had a similar thing to her where I was walking into school at San Diego State and there was this bridge that everyone walks on to go to the campus. And I was walking across the bridge, holding my books, wearing a skirt. It was in May or something was nice out. Except San Diego gets freakish wind sometimes and I'm on a bridge. And so I'm holding my books, and this windstorm comes, and my skirt flies up. Yes. It flies up. You can see everything. Really? Were you commando? No, I had a... Thong. Yes. Yeah. And those cheeks, and I dropped all my books. And my books, one of my books fell off of the bridge. Yes. And there's cars coming underneath. Oh, no. Oh, my gosh. And I was by myself. I was just like, oh. Wow. I lost a book. That's... Lauren, you, Lauren's, she'll call you. Aren't you a little on the. I'm very clumsy. Clumsy. And that's, I just had to think of like, which story was the worst one for me. Really? Yeah. I'm like, wow, when haven't I fallen? You do, not only do you fall, but you just do, we've seen you just do clumsy stuff. Just throw pens, throw salsa. Like one of the first times we met her.

2:43:18We're in a conference room together and she's talking to all of us. And she this was at a time where we didn't know her well yet. So she hadn't talked in front of us much. And so it was like one of her first ideas that she wanted to give to us. And so she had a pen in her hand and she just kind of put her hand up in the air and she goes out of her hand across the room. He goes, whoa, whoa, whoa. How about, what was she eating the other day? I was sitting across from her at the table, and she took a bite of something, and it, like, gleaped. It squirted. It squirted onto my plate of food. Oh, it was a pepperoncini. It was a pepperoncini. She bit into a pepperoncini, and the juice of it spews out. Oh, my God. That's gross. It was onto my food. That was so gross. I continued to eat it, but it wasn't the same. Amazing. The worst one I think I probably had was... I was surfing, and the only time I get hurt when I'm surfing is when I... It's like the smallest day, and it's like really calm conditions, and I do something stupid. So on this particular day, I was like...

2:44:27I got off my board because it was so hot, and I just dipped in for a second. When I came up, my board had wandered right to where my head was, and I came up and was like, boing, and had a golf ball in the middle of my head. I had a little mini concussion and everything. So the next day, I'm like, I'm going to stay out of the water, but I'm going to skateboard instead. Did you put some wheat on that bump on your head? No, I just put some ice. Just some ice. And so I decided I was going to skateboard. Yeah, frozen ginger. And I went. Down this hill. And I, like, I'm not really, like, that good at skateboarding. And I decided, I'm like, I'm going to go all out. So I went down this hill. And within, like. Looney tunes. Yeah, within, like, five minutes, I was going, like, 75 miles an hour. And then this, I was actually doing okay. And then this car pulled out of a parking spot. And I had no idea how to stop. So I just bailed. Completely bailed. And, like. Did like eight somersaults in the road. Wow. And then the board went like flying underneath the car that was going. And he stopped dead in his tracks, stuck his head out the window and looked at me and then kept going. Nice. But these two ladies that were walking, they were on a walk and I could see them fighting the laugh so hard. And I even started laughing. They were like, oh my God. Are you okay? Are you okay? That was...

2:45:53That was awful. It's way worse being alone, right? Because you don't know what to do. Do you laugh at yourself? No way. It's worse being with people. No, it's not. Oh, my. I can see you. But then you have someone to laugh with. No, then that's somebody to go tell that story. I was skateboarding down to the train station, and my wife would give me two juice boxes, and I had them in my coat pocket. Aw, big boy. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Were you four or five? No, no, I was an adult. Come on. This was not too long ago. Grow up, Count Choculus. And so I'm skateboarding down, and I fall, and I fall on both the juice packets, and they explode. I stood up and people thought I was bleeding. Oh, no. Just bleeding cranberry juice. It was apple. Oh, man. Amazing. I love juice boxes. I do, too. This wasn't a spill, but it was one of the most embarrassing things I've ever done. It's kind of in that vein. Do you guys know who Judy Collins is? No. Tom Collins' wife? No. Is she the author? Nope. Judge Judy. I'm going to play you. James Gumm. No. This is Judy Collins. I like it. I don't know where this is going. I know this. You know it. It's called Hose and Flows of Angels.

2:47:22Is that the same? Yeah, she does this too. That's Hose and Flows, right? Where are the clowns? You've heard this, right? Where are the clowns? Send in the clowns? Yeah. It's amazing. What is happening right now? You guys have never heard this. This should be my theme song. No, I was thinking of a Joni Mitchell song. Judy Collins is a singer from the 1960s. She had a big hit with this, Send in the Clowns. Amazing. Well, I worked for a radio station that played that type of music when I was younger. Right? I hated it. And I was heavier. I was much heavier. And I wore glasses. Wow. Train wreck. Do you have contacts in now? No, I got the surgery. LASIK? The LASIK surgery. I was like, whoa. Lucky. So I was, I had to one day, I had to go to this mountain winery concert. They had concerts at this mountain winery. Of course they did. Gosh. Torture. And I had to introduce Judy Collins on stage.

2:48:25Oh, gosh. And I was so nervous already because I was an obese guy wearing... And I had glasses and suspenders. What are you, Gallagher? Hang on, hang on. At the time... To the picture? Hang on. Thank you, Lord. This was like 1991. And at the time, on tall, handsome models, suspenders... Like business suspenders. They're back already. Are they really? I love suspenders. Black business suspenders were like cool. Okay. Not the rainbow ones. Don't take this the wrong way, Mikey. Don't take this the wrong way. I already did. I've already taken it the wrong way. I'm like, I'm picturing like rerun. You're so close. You're so like, I'm telling you. Did you have your beret on? Yeah, I don't even know what rerun is. Did you have your beret on? I love that show. What is it? What's happening? What's happening? I don't know. Dude. Raj. Hey, hey, hey. Rerun. Dude.

2:49:49Sorry. I was totally rerun. I think you just gave Mikey a new nickname. Danny, I'm going to need Mikey's face transposed on rerun's body on the M1 site. Do not make any shirts with Mikey's face. Don't make a single shirt with Mikey's face that says rerun under it. Rerun on superimposed on rerun's body. With suspenders. Rerun. Superimposed on rerun's body. Oh, my God. Amazing. Oh, why did I do it? I'm sorry. Why did I do it? I'm sorry. I'm a very visual person, and my head was just going. At first, it went boom, boom, boom. That's who it is. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. That is so close to what I look like. That's who it is? I love it. I'm not kidding you. It's from a TV show, Sienna, called What's Happening. See, now I feel 100 times better. Google image. Rerun. Rerun What's Happening. And you'll get, okay, so, so, so. I mean, like, let's, that's not the story, though. Like, that's not even the. It gets worse. Yeah. I mean, that's enough for it to be. That's just the visual. We've painted the visual. Just for me to say that that's who I was is like, oh, yeah, dude, that's really humiliating. But no, no, no, no. So I, before I bring Judy Collins on stage, I have to go to the restroom. Oh, no. So I'm at the urinal, okay? Oh, Mikey.

2:51:12And as I am zipping up. Bring some beans? No. No. I guess the best way to put this is. Splashing? Yes. Splashing. Wasn't quite done. Oh, no. All over my pants. How? Because, you know what? Guys know. When you're, you know, sort of... Doing the shake off? Yes. I mean, I wasn't going to... Well, yes, Sienna, yes. Doing the shake, drying it off. Yes. It's now, like, picture Rerun wearing, like, beige pants that he just, you know... Wet. Went. He sprayed. On himself. He wet. Right. And it's like, four minutes, Mike.

2:52:15And I'm like, no. No, no, no, no, no, no. Like, this is a nightmare. This is a nightmare. I already look like Rerun in a Mexican body. I'm already... No! I'm already Rerun. I got a huge water bottle and poured it all over myself. Yeah. Yeah! So I had to go out on that stage. Mike, no. Hi. Hello, everyone. Welcome to the winery. My name's Mike. My name is... At the time, I went by Michael Shannon. I'm Michael Shannon from K-Wave 97 FM. I would like to welcome everyone to the Mountain Winery here tonight. Nice one, Woods. That was good. Let's everyone please give a warm welcome. Doesn't get much warmer than that. Hold on. You really just walked out with... I had to. Hold on.

2:53:27Why is nobody asking him? I tried my best. No, no. Why isn't anybody asking you when the hell your name was Michael Shannon? Yeah, exactly. It's his radio name. Michael Shannon? The only Latino named Shannon? Ever? On FM 94.9. If you're in the market for a new car, here are some important things to consider. Ford is far and away America's strongest automaker, offering models built for San Diego. Ford Fusion was just named Motor Trend's 2010 Car of the Year. Fusion Hybrid delivers up to 41 miles per gallon in the city. That's even better than Camry Hybrid. Ford Escape is fast becoming San Diego's favorite SUV with a hybrid model that gets 34 miles per gallon in the city. Ford Focus delivers up to 35 miles per gallon on the highway and comes available with hands-free sync technology. A Ford exclusive. Today, nobody beats Ford quality. Not Honda, not Toyota. Nobody. Take a new Ford home now and get huge cash rebates, plus financing as low as zero APR. Learn more at sandiegocountyford.com or visit your nearest San Diego County Ford dealer.

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3:00:32This report also brought to you by AutoZone. Now at AutoZone, get five plus quart oil, change jug or five quarts of castor oil, GTX motor oil, and an STP filter, just $16.99. Restrictions and details are at your store. Get to AutoZone today. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego, Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of the Mikey Show. FM 94.9. Let's see, Jay, do we have a cool prize we could give away to listeners? Is there something we could be giving away? I do indeed. I have a pair of tickets to see Bad Religion, Friday, March 19th. Nice. All right, let's do this. We'll take a couple of phone calls, then we're going to play a game. And the game is hair and boy band. Like trivia. Done. All right. So we'll do it. Let's see. M1 Poppy. Hey. Hi.

3:02:24Hi. I just wanted to thank you guys for making me have a good morning. Oh, awesome. You're making me laugh my bed off. I love stories when people get hurt and embarrassed. It's the best thing ever. Yeah, and both happened. Both happened, so. I have a story, actually. What happened? I have a two-year-old, and I was grocery shopping with my two-year-old, standing waiting in line at the fish counter with all kinds of people around me. And something happens to me when I go shopping. Sometimes I just have to go to the bathroom. So I say to my two-year-old, I have to find a bathroom. And he doesn't have the quietest voice for a two-year-old. In his loudest voice possible, he says, Mama, do you have to go doo-doo? Wow. That embarrasses me. That embarrasses me even now. I'm embarrassed. And it's just my wife that's hearing it. Like, I'll be in the bathroom and the door will be closed, okay?

3:03:22And my son, Jake, will walk up to the door. And the only person that can hear him is my wife. And Jake will go, is daddy going poo-poo? And I'm like, my goodness, please. You know, please. Keep it. Don't say that. That embarrasses you? Yes. It doesn't just embarrass me. It's like humiliating. It's humiliating. Who cares? I know it is. I'm like, no, son. I'm solving the world's problem. I'm shaving my head. With an abacus. Oh, see, to me, it's so not a big deal. Oh, it's so embarrassing. I'll make the announcement when I'm on my way. I'm very private. We used to like... like sing songs about it when my dad was in the bathroom. Really? I just don't want to know. Yeah. Really? It was funny. Todd, my fiance, he said when his daughter was younger, like, you know, two or something, she, whenever he would come home from work, he had to do his routine business, you know? And so that was right when dad got home from work, she wanted to spend time with him. So she would just sit in there with him.

3:04:19Every single day. What? He said she learned to go to the bathroom and get out of diapers real quick that way. Are you serious? Every day she sat there with him. Gross. I know. That's gross. I'm very private. Very, very private. Don't want anyone. I mean, I'll pipe up about it, but I don't want anybody in the room with me. What if your cat popped out of the shower? What are you doing? My dogs will jump on my lap sometimes. Oh, that's gross. I almost vomited. Why? Todd's sitting there with his daughter, and that's not disgusting. Yeah, but his daughter's not chilling in his lap when he's pushing. Yeah, but his daughter's in there while he's... Yeah, same thing. Dropping deuce. It's worse. It's disgusting. 570-1949 if you want to play. I got one more. We were playing Scrabble as a family, and my son was... He was probably about 8, 9, maybe. And he says, oh, hold on, I got to the bathroom. So he leaves, but he takes his towels with him, and we're playing. He's like, okay, I got a word. from the other room. I'm like, oh, my gosh. No, you don't. No, you don't play from the bathroom. Throw those tiles away, too. When you get back, throw those tiles right away. Yeah. Just throw them away. Then take bleach to the whole place. You guys, who cares? All right, so you're going to pick either Woods, Sienna, or Lauren.

3:05:38It's time to redeem myself. All right. I got schooled the other day. What are we playing? Hair and boy bands? It's hair and boy bands. What does that mean? What it means is that I'm going to play for you either a hair or a boy band. What's a hair band? Do we have to get the band, the title, or both? All you have to give me is title or artist. That's it. Either one? Yes. Yes. That's the rules. All you have to give me is the name of the song. All you can know is the name of the song, and you win. All you can know is the name of the band. Fine. Done. I don't even know what hairband is. Todd's 38. You know hairband? Hairbands are like, you know. Poison. There's one in my hair. I'm holding my ponytail. Poison. Poison. I'm serious. Okay, I'm going to suck. Weird. You're going to do fun. Boybands, maybe I'll do. Okay. How many questions? I don't know. Let's do. Yeah, we got it. We have to have a. I don't know the difference between odd and even. You what? I don't. Stop it. Write that down. Write that down. It's one of my things. Like, I can't spell. 2, 4, 6, 8. I can't spell the word restaurant. I can't either. I can't either. I can't spell restaurant, and I don't know the difference between odd and even. And people have explained it to me a million times, and I don't know. Come on, Mikey. 2, 4, 6, 8, 10. But I'm telling you, I'm a reasonably intelligent man, but I don't know odd and even.

3:07:00Restaurant. Is it R-E-S-T-A-U-R-A-N-T? Yes. Are you sure? It's Restaurant. Restaurant. Now, do we need to have an odd number or an even number? We need an odd number. Well, three people. It just depends. Let's just roll with the punches and not worry about it. We're in radio for a reason. Don't need to overthink things. Good idea. Let's start with M1 Paco. What's happening? What up, dude? Who do you want to pick? Not a boy. Oh, that's a shocker. Oh, no. I just... Are you there? Are you... Oh, no. Oh, my. Paco, call back. He's like, you... And in the process, I hung up on the next person that was waiting. No. This is your first day on the air. Look at Jay. Look at Jay. Jay's really, really upset. I know. Jay's looking down on you. I know. I don't blame him. M1 truck driver? I'm here. Who do you want?

3:07:59I'll take Lauren. Yes, truck driver. Well, he hung up on mine. Paco was taking Woods. Yeah. So we got to get Paco back on the line. And we'll play. All right? We'll play anyway. What about Sienna? Well, somebody had Sienna. Oh, they did? Yeah, they did. He hung up on him. Yeah, hung up on two people. Okay. Are you ready? As soon as you recognize. I don't have a partner. We can't play yet. How do you need a partner? I mean, someone to win for. Here's Paco's back. I'm going to talk to Paco first. Everybody's calmed down. I'm upset. Everybody's screaming. M1 Paco, you there? Yes, sir. I'm back. I will not hang up on you. Hang on a line. Oops, I hung up on him. I'm so nervous. It's going to be great. And we'll get yours on the line, too, Woodsy. But let's play. Paco is mine. That would be Sienna. My name is Sienna. Sienna. Sienna. You don't know my name. No one wants to be my partner. Here we go. You want to talk to your partner? Yes, I do. You just want to hear their voice? Yes. I need to know they're there. M1, Irish-Mexican. I love it already. What up? What up? Love you, Irish-Mexican. You got Sienna. Sienna, bring it home for me. I'm Irish, too. Hang on a line. What is that of that? Bring it home for me? Bring it home? Here we go. That's a stretch.

3:09:20As soon as you... Look at Lauren. It just kills her. As soon as you recognize it, say your name. I have to sneeze. Go ahead. It's not happening yet. It's just right there, you know? Look up. Look at the light. Are you ready? Yeah. Don't yell at me, Mikey. I'm sorry. Bon Jovi. That was pretty impressive. Was that Justin Timberlake? You ready? Yeah. I'm from New Jersey. I should have had that. Here we go. Lauren. Backstreet Boys. Well done. Here we go. What? Lauren. Brian Adams. No, what am I doing? You just missed one, too, didn't you? I lose a part. Point deducted. That was O-Town, all or nothing. I thought you were rotating. The same exact thing was. It sounds just like Brian Adams. It does. No, it's true. Hey, yo, what's up, girl?

3:10:24This is Woods from O-Town. What's up, Woods? What's up, girl? How you doing, man? I'm all right, dog. What you doing, man? I love how he does the arm movement with it. He does the whole thing. I finally came out of the sneeze. Thank you. I can play now. Let's go. Ready? Yeah. Lauren. Hanson. That was awesome. Can we hear that for a minute? You already deleted it, didn't you? Already deleted it. Thank God. Here we go. Whoa. Lauren? Warren? Yes, take a point away. Keep going. Great audio, Jay. I will punch you in your face. Let it roll. That's Woods. That's Poison. Yeah, I knew what it was. I always mix them up. You ready? Yep. Woods. Def Leppard. Oh, no. I hate this game. Weird. Irish-Mexican, I love you, though.

3:11:42Oh, it's Motley Crue. Come on. New kids on the block. Step by step. Okay, this is every single one of these songs. Ooh, baby. Every single one. Gotta get to you, girl. Except for Hanson. What about O-Town? Woods gets a point to duck it out. I don't even know what O-Town is. What are we at? It's one to one. Oh, wow. I haven't even spoken, and I'm not far behind. You ready? Yeah. Sienna. NSYNC. Wow, this is close. Now I'm tied. Thank you, Mikey. Woods, great white. Once bitten till I shot. Oh, it's a jam. All right, you guys ready? Lauren, 98 degrees. Nice.

3:12:37There are only one, two, three, four left. Sienna is expressionless right now. I'm bored. Woods and Lauren enjoying themselves to the nth degree. Why do I get punished for being younger? Poor Irish Mexican right now. You know, excuse me, I'm only behind by one. Really? Yes, the score is two to two to one. Two to two to one. Here we go. I can take this. Here we go. Boys to men. Wait. No, wait. Yeah. That was Woods. Run that back. I think that should go to the one that didn't even interrupt. Run that back. I think that was me. I got to make. No, cross it out. I have to make it. Sienna is so competitive. But Lori can't have it either because she didn't give the answer. I'm going to strike it. Good. That's the only fair thing to do. Now I have to stand up. I'm going to sit. I'm going to lie on the floor. Here we go.

3:13:41Woods, Dokken. Dokken is correct. I was breaking the chains. There are only two left. Oh, my goodness. I won't get any of them because they're probably both boy bands. Would you like to know the score? Yes. Woods has three. Lauren has two. I have one. Here we go. Sienna. Might as well try, right? New edition. Wow. Sienna. Nice. Thank you, Todd. It's only because of you. Nice work. Thank you. What's the score? Two to two to three. Woods has three. Oh, my gosh. Mamacita, mamacita. Woods. Yes. Bad word. No. Thank you. Kid killed it. The kid. Back to his winning ways, Michael. Woods won. It was four. Lauren and I tied with two. Paco hung up. Give it to the Irish Mexican. Woods, he's guy hung up. We got to figure he probably lost self. Sorry. Paco, call back. Call back, buddy. Call back.

3:14:56I bet Paco's a big Bad Religion fan. Can you go see Bad Religion? What's he thinks? Taylor Swift is cute. I do too. Yeah. She needs to eat a burrito. She what? She needs to eat a burrito. Oh, come on with that. With the girls all the time. I just noticed in the movie. She's too skinny. She's a tall drink of water. I just think she needs to age a few years before you guys can be making those comments. She cut her own food? Grossest thing I've ever heard. She cut her own food? The Mikey Show. FM 94.9. There's more to life than a Volvo. That's not a statement any other car company has the confidence to make. But for Volvo, a brand that has always been synonymous with safety and trust, it's simply what we believe. As our founder said over 80 years ago, cars are driven by people. The guiding principle behind everything we make at Volvo, therefore, is and must remain safety. This principle, to build beautifully designed cars that protect you and the ones you love, still holds true.

3:15:56In fact, we are so confident in the cars we put on the road today that we now have a best-in-class coverage plan to protect you from unplanned expenses. It's called the Volvo Safe and Sound Coverage Plan. It provides five years of warranty, five years of factory schedule maintenance, five years of wear and tear coverage, and five years of roadside assistance. This means next to no cost to you for the first five years of ownership, and it's complementary with every new Volvo. Volvo, the brand you can trust. has now made the cost of owning the car as safe as the cars we build. There's more to life than a Volvo. That's why you drive one. Attention to all Americans struggling with medical bills and credit card debt. Due to the economic crisis, a program approved by the United States government now may eliminate 100% of your medical bills and credit card debt entirely. This program is now available to the general public through the Chapter 7 Federal Bankruptcy Act and here to offer Americans a fresh start during these hard economic times. We have one goal in mind with this program, and that is to allow Americans to keep their homes, cars, and personal property while eliminating 100% of your debts for good. For more information and to see if you qualify for this government-approved program, call the American Bankruptcy Hotline today, 800-304-0661. Over 1.5 million Americans are expected to take advantage of this opportunity this year alone.

3:17:10While the economy is getting worse and worse, there is no better time than now to file bankruptcy on your debts and walk away from 100% of it for good through this program. For more information, call America's Bankruptcy Hotline now. 800-304-0661. 800-304-0661. Again, that's 800-304-0661. Check engine. So many things can go wrong with your car. That's why Pep Boys invented one place that can make them all right. Right now, it's the Pep Boys Presidential Tire Event. Buy one tire starting at the incredible low price of $29.99.

3:17:52Buy any two installed tires and get a free oil change. A free oil change. Or buy any three installed tires and get the fourth tire free. After mail-in rebate, buy three, get the fourth tire free. Both offers exclude Cornell. See store for details. On Sunday, get a do-it-yourself Castrol GTX oil change with Purolator filter, only $11.99. After manufacturer mail-in rebate. That's five quarts and filter, just $11.99. Call 1-800-PEP-BOYS or visit pepboys.com. People everywhere recommending Ovation Cell Therapy for thicker, stronger, longer, and healthier looking hair guaranteed. I started using Ovation for my thinning hair, but Ovation has also cleared up the skin condition on my scalp I've been fighting for over 20 years. Ovation really works.

3:18:45For healthier hair, log on to OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout for a special discount. That's OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout. For real results, guaranteed. Ovation works. Ovation is for real. Grow your hair thicker, stronger, longer, and faster. Or get your money back, guaranteed. Since I've been using Ovation, I've noticed a significant difference in the texture and shine. And my hair has grown at least two and a half inches. Ovation does all it claims to do. I'd recommend Ovation to everyone, and I do. For thicker, stronger, longer hair, log on to OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout. For a special discount, that's OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout. For real results, guaranteed. Ovation works. Will you be ready when the stars of NASCAR roar into Auto Club Speedway for the West Coast premiere of the 2010 racing season? It all kicks off Friday, February 19th with NASCAR Qualifying Day, followed by Danica Patrick's debut in the Stater Brothers 300 on Saturday. Finally, on Sunday, the main event takes center stage for the Auto Club 500 NASCAR Sprint Cup Series race. Great seats start at just $35. Get your NASCAR tickets today.

3:19:54Visit autoclustspeedway.com or call 800-944-RACE. Tomorrow. Your boys seem a little on edge right now, Marshall. We all are. Discover what is happening on Shutter Island. A mental hospital with a criminally insane. Peter Travers of Rolling Stone calls it mesmerizing. Whatever the hell's going on here, it's bad. With so much suspense, it's hot to the touch. I'm gonna blow the lid off this place. From director Martin Scorsese. Don't you get it? They're a random maze. Leonardo DiCaprio. They can't let you leave. They can't stop me. Shutter Island. Rated R. No one under 17 a minute without parent. In theaters tomorrow. To communicate the sheer speed of high-speed internet from AT&T, we decided to use the actors who usually read the legal disclaimers at the end of commercials for the whole commercial. Hey, Lisa, check this out. What is it, Dad? I'm doing my homework. I've got lots of homework. But look at all these cool videos I downloaded on the computer. They download it so fast. Dad, we have high-speed internet from AT&T. That makes everything fast. What did you download? Watch this. That is lame. What about this one? That is lame. This one.

3:20:53That is lame. Come on, that kid just got hit in the face with a dodgeball. Here, watch it again. You should use high-speed internet from AT&T to download music. How much longer are you going to hog the computer? For a limited time, see store for details. Like I haven't heard that before. Gets me every time. Switch to high-speed internet from AT&T. Choose any speed for just $24.95 a month for 12 months with qualifying services and a one-year term. That's a one-year price guarantee. Call 1-800-ATT-4U or visit att.com slash speed. The new AT&T, your world delivered. Taxes, excessive usage, and other charges may apply. After 12 months, non-discounted rate for internet service applies. For details, visit att.com slash offer details or for N71710. Looking for a way to improve your commute? For only $379 a month, drive your very own C300 sports sedan. Hurry into one of your San Diego County Mercedes-Benz dealers today. Are we awake? This is not a dream. This is reality. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, more of the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. It's a Mikey Show. I'm Mikey. That's Steve Woods. Hi. That's Lauren O'Brien. Hi. That's Sienna. That's Jay. Or as we like to call him, Juicebox. Juicebox. JB. That's right. JB.

3:22:23You're doing easy, JB. Easy, JB. We got a text message that says, from now on, Jay's nickname should be Juicebox. For the record, Mike, just for the record, I've never portrayed myself as single. I have always said I'm a married man. I am a happily married man. I think it's just the persona of the sort of clownish personality. Yeah, I think that might be. Happily married to see my wife in a few hours. Don't cry, Woods. You get, by the way. Don't cry. Just get. I know you're emotional. You get. FM949SD.com. They're having an About the Music show with Temper Tramp. Temper Trap. Sorry. Here he comes. I know. Stupid Mikey. You didn't even get the name right, man. You're an idiot, dude. You're a freaking moron. Jesus freak. You don't even know the name of the band. You Jesus freak. I knew it. I knew it. I hate you. I've been listening for 10 days straight, and I hate you. 925 a.m. Thursday, February 18th. I knew it. Dump it. Sir, sir, can I explain for a minute? No. I knew he was an idiot. I knew he was a freak.

3:23:57If you only let me just say one thing. No, I will not let you say one thing because he just said temper tramp. Temper tramp. Can you call back later? You listen to me. You listen to me now. I knew it. I knew it. I knew it. He's a temper trampist. He's a temper tramp. He should only. I called the radio station, and I told them, I said, I know he's going to go on the air, and I know he's going to mess up temper trap. And what did he do? What did he do? He went on there, and, oh, yeah, temper trap is now a trap, right? Oh, yeah, the temper trap is a whore now, right, Jesus Christ? Right, Jesus Christ? I wish you guys could see him right now. Oh, wait, you can. There's a video cam. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. The temper tramps, huh? Whoring around town. Some sort of prostitutes. Is that it? Is this CeCe DeVille on the line from Poison? I want to try this. Actually, it is, yes. How you doing, CeCe? I'm doing pretty good. How are you? You still on the cocaine? A little bit, yeah. You sound like it. Every now and then, temper tramp.

3:25:21Want to try it again, Mike? Mike, he's back. Yeah, I just wanted to tell you that FM949SD.com is about the music, and they've got a show coming up with Temper Trap. And it goes on sale Friday at noon. I thought Temper Trap goes on sale! You freak of joy! You can get all the information on Temper Trap at the website. Oh, yeah! Where can you get information about Ronald Reagan, you right-wing psychopathic criminal? On the website as well. Doesn't that hurt? It's a great website, by the way. It's very informative. Yeah, I mean, you can get codes in there. You get early pre-sale to the show. Oh, the temper trap? Is that what we're going to get the pre-sale for? And let me guess. Do we also get a little bit of information about Sarah Palin, the Republican? Don't forget about God. Jesus Christ himself. You freak! You know what else you can see on there? What? Hillary's blog and bio. Yeah, why would anybody think that he was a married man? Yeah, what is that? What is it it was? I just want to go in the air and let everybody know. You know, how dare you label me? Hey, so I have a crush on her. It's fine.

3:26:46But I have never once portrayed that I am a single... It's harmless. Jay, do you have a crush on Hillary? No, I respect her as a woman. Liar! Liar! That was the most fantastic thing. Jay's a happily married man. He's got four kids. And he's nodding at me while he says it. And he's sticking his tongue out doing all kinds of obscene gestures. I'm a married man. Unbelievable. I'm a married, of course I wouldn't. How dare you? So, speaking of married men, what's going on with Taylor Swift? She apparently is considering a tattoo. Do it. It's so original. And this is news? Do it. It's so original. Of course it's news. Wait, wait, wait. The reason I think it's news is because she's a young person. She doesn't drink. She's never smoked anything in her life. I would never. have any sort of intercourse with a male at any point unless I'm married. And I never have told a lie. Now, why are you making her? It's so bad. She's the next Tiger Woods. She is. She's going to sex camp. Anyone who is that perfect. I don't know if I'm going to get it or not. I'm trying to figure out if that compromises being a role model or not. My mom says it doesn't. My dad says it does. So I'm just kind of trying to figure out what to do.

3:28:07What's wrong? That's nice. You're a grown woman. You know what you call that, Mikey? A temper tramp. That's what you call her. You call her a temper tramp, Mikey, because that's what you do. She's going to get one of those temper tramps right above her crack. Might as well be a bullseye. Tramp stamp. You know what you call that, though? What? Kid calls that Cadillac problems. Yeah, Cadillac problems. That's the only thing she's worried about. Kid calls it Cadillac problems. Here's the deal. You want to be original these days? Don't get a tattoo. Don't get your nose pierced. Don't get your butt pierced. What? Don't get anything pierced. My butt pierced? Okay? You want to be the original guy on the block? Mikey's got tats. I've got a tat. You want to be original? You do? Go tatless. Go tatless. That's original. What's your tat? He's got a little butterfly on the small of his back. It stretches from hip to hip. It says, I'm a happily married man. I'm happily married. It's my wife's name. Right. Across my back. It's a tramp stamp, but it's my wife's name. What is it, really? drunk on 6th Street in Austin and got a tattoo of a son on my back for no reason other than it looked cool on the wall. That's fantastic. And I'd had some tequilas. Well, I think it's nice that Taylor Swift is concerned about being a role model. I think that's nice. She's going to get a guitar. That's kind of cool, then. I just made that up. Oh, okay. Never mind. What's wrong with being a role model? She's going to get... Nothing. Cinderella. See what she does, though? Sienna makes it into being, like, bad.

3:29:33She's like, oh, this is perfect. Well, just Taylor Swift, everyone's like, oh, she's so sweet. Oh, her songs are so nice. But it happened to everybody. I mean, you know, Britney was like the sweet, innocent girl. Look at her now. You know what, though? When Britney, when the thing was going on, Britney, you could tell, was just a part of the machine. She would even say it wasn't her. No, like, Taylor actually genuinely says this. Britney never talked that talk. Britney was always like, I want to add it. I don't like this. I don't want this. Christina Aguilera, they did her when her genie in the bottle days, they portrayed her as this really innocent girl. And then her next song was dirty. Farty. It should have been farty. She's not farty. She's so farty. She's beautiful. She's gorgeous. She's so farty. No. Don't follow her into the bathroom. Disgusting. Was that Lauren? It was me. Every time I do the woods fart. I feel like it's not good enough. No, it's getting better. It's just too high-pitched. It's... Yeah, but... Well, my voice is probably lower than yours, but... Fair enough. All right. You tell me if this should be on the banned list. Not B-A-N-D. Not B-A-N-D. It's B-A-N-N-E-D. So should these things get banned? Should we ban them? Now, there's always disagreement on the banned list. Because some of us go, that shouldn't be banned. There's nothing wrong with that. What's wrong with that? Moccasins.

3:30:59No. Is that Billy on the list? I just marked it off, but it was on there. Who put that on there? I think Jay did. Jay, we have problems. See again? We have problems, my friend. Excuse me. God, I wish I was wearing them today. These don't just come from us. These are emailed to us. No, they're not. Yes, they are. Everyone loves moccasins. Not one person. If by everyone, you mean you. I do. I don't think that they're running rampant enough for people to feel either way about them. That was a direct dig at me, whoever put it in there. You'd be banning one pair. Yeah. Yeah, the only person wearing them is Sienna. Yeah, you'd be banning one pair in this county. When I portrayed my public love for moccasins, I can't tell you how many emails I got. Where'd you get the mocks? Kind of like mine with cargo shorts. Get out, buddy. We're not talking about you and your cargo shorts. Same thing. Cargo shorts have become a four-letter word. They have around here. You know what that word is? Here we go! Jay! Jay! Jay! Jay! Jay! Jay! Jay! Jay! Jay! Jay! Sorry. I was trying to get to him, but my foot was tangled in my headphone wires. How great is that word, by the way?

3:32:21If only it was a bit. I can't believe he did it twice in two days. Maybe one day. Maybe one day. The best is going to be when somebody calls up and just, I hate Mikey. He's this, this. And we're like, it's on the air. They're cussing. They're cussing. I love it. Goodness. Next thing on the ban. Should we ban? Wimpy vampires. Who made this list? I don't know. I don't remember these. These get emailed. They come on the text. Ladies, ladies, FYI, all of you listening, there's no such thing as vampires. You don't know that. Edward Cullen. Push dump. You don't know that. Push dump. Edward Cullen does not exist. Nobody is going to come. Nobody is going to come up to Escondido and drag you from your house. And love you for eternity. Really? It's not going to happen. You're telling me that there's not a really romantic, pale vampire right now. Mikey, Mikey. Near the La Costa Lagoon. He has diamonds on his skin. He doesn't exist. Ladies. What is wrong with you? Ladies. You want to just go ahead and talk about Santa Claus? Ladies. He's not out there. It's the goofiest thing. It's the goofiest thing. These housewives women are like, oh my God, I'm Team Edward. Get. What you grow up.

3:33:37Grow up. Who was just preaching about Taylor Swift? Yeah, exactly. Taylor Swift's hot. And who was just preaching about how he's a happily married man? I can say she's hot. You don't know what you're talking about. Yes, I do. Hey, there's no such thing as vampires. They exist. They're not going to love you forever. Trust me. Lauren, have you read them all? Yeah, of course. I'm not saying that Edward Cullen's going to sweep up to my house in Escondido with his beautiful diamond skin and perfect... Chiseled chest. And his four-foot hair. I'm just saying I wish he would. I wish he would. That's all I'm saying. That's all I'm saying. No, we're quite aware that it's fantasy, but why not? Not all of you. Well, yeah, maybe not. Some people are really into it. What about creepy Facebook ads? Ads? Ads are... What is that? I don't know. Creepy Facebook ads? I guess it's the... Oh, is it like Pootsie who's looking at your profile right now? Oh, those? Yeah. It's always larger breasted women that are looking at mine. I can tell you. How do we feel about mafia land? Who cares? Farm town? Farm town. I'm about to delete you if you play it. I just, I don't play. Nor do I. I have a real job. No, you can play. I just, I'm saying, I...

3:35:01I'm not interested in accepting this, you know, swan from the farm. I've never once, I don't even know what it is. Except a ray of sunshine as I'm trying to build. No, I'm good. I'm good, thank you. Will you please help me advance in the mafia by clicking on my mafia? Please whack this guy out for me. I'm just like, oh. I'm tired. But listen, I got family members that love it, so I'm just saying it's not for me, but I got family members that love it. You're kidding. Oh, dude. Your brother Steve. No, but we're the only two in the world that don't do the Mafia-ville. Wait, me and you? Yeah. No, I don't do it, but it does not discriminate. It starts with the young, ends with the old. Everyone's doing it. You do any of that, Sienna? I see it. I don't even know what it is. I don't even click on it.

3:35:58Should we ban Livestrong Bracelet knockoffs? So in other words, it's not... Yes. No, but some of them are for breast cancer and stuff. If they're for a decent cause, fine. But what if they're for... The Mikey Show. The Mikey Show, which we considered for two minutes and went, it's too dumb. Oh, it's so dumb. We couldn't do it. We couldn't do it. I said, we can't do it. It's just, I can't... No. Eh, they don't bother me. Really? It's like, why don't you go ahead and ban the earrings? All right. I think they're a little different than earrings. All right. What about track suits? Absolutely not. Are we talking about the waterproof ones that when you walk, it's like... No, like the velour ones. Yes, the velour ones. Like the mafioso ones. Matching. I think I just gave myself a paper cut. What's the matter with them? Dude, I like them. You like them, right? I'm a Sopranos guy. You know that. For men or for women, are you talking about? Either.

3:36:57Oh, and I think the velour ones on the women are sexy. The juicy ones? Yes. They're really sexy. Let's say pink on the butt. Yeah, they're sexy. Stupid. Pink on the butt or Victoria's Secret. I love them. I like them too. Very foxy. We get it. Your butt's pink? We get it. Look at my butt. It says words on it. Okay. Done. If you got a nice one, I mean, might as well want to flaunt it. I guess I walked into that one. Lauren, what's the problem? I get it. It exploits women. Is that it? Yeah. It exploits women? No, it does not exploit women. Women wear it themselves. It's fine. It's just like... You don't like them. No. You would never wear it. But you're not the type to go... You'd wear a burlap bag before you'd wear that. I don't know what that is. She's got a purse made out of kimonos. I do. I do. She does. They're recycled Japanese kimonos. Stop. Stop.

3:37:56It's the funniest when she does it. I don't know what's going on. Yeah, you know, remember James Gunn from Silence of the Lambs? No. He wore her purse. Those are made from the shirts of his victims. Yeah. Some people make purses out of skin. I make them out of recycled kimono. Did you make that purse? No. That would have been awesome. Yeah, no. I actually spent like five hours on it. Where'd you get that material? Well, I found this guy sitting next to the school on Boston. I was like... About a size 12. What does that mean? And I was like, I was like, hey. Can you help me put this couch in my room? Oh, we need to get Sienna a copy of Silence of the Lambs ASAP. Yes. I'm too busy. We make that joke every day, and she's like, I don't care. I'm too busy. You'd think you would have watched it by now. I'm too busy. I'll tell you that a couple more times. Platform flip-flops. Oh, yeah. Yeah, those are definitely sexy. How about platform suede orthopedic shoes? Stop. Mikey, go with it. He loves his lugs. Keep them. Mikey loves his lugs. You know what the thing is? I would laugh if you were wearing them, but Mikey pulls them off. That's one thing he pulls off. I wouldn't have noticed them if you didn't point them out. Yeah, it's just...

3:39:30I noticed them right away. Mike, you pull them off, and you pull them off well. Why does Mike look five inches taller today? He's got his orthopedic shoes on. Orthotics. Orthotics. They're not. They're not. The platform sandals, yes. Girls, if you have them, it's time. I don't know if I know what those are. Throw them away. They're big ones here. We're called rocket dogs. I think I know. Or cork, right? No, not quirk. You can't say that on the radio. Not quirk. Those are like platforms. You can't say that on the radio, dude. More of the band list when we come back. I think platform flip-flops. Say it. Flip-flop. I think that they're... You're thinking of wedges, I think, is what you're thinking of. You're not thinking of the right thing. I'm going to show you pictures. They're sexy on a girl. Wedges, not platform flip-flops. I'll come around and look on the Google image. Yep. Say Google. Breaking news, there has been a small plane crash into a building in Austin, Texas. Yes, a lot of family there, dude. It's the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. It's important in life to make time for the things that matter. To make time for fun, time for adventure, and time for joy. All easily accomplished in a new BMW 3 Series. And right now...

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3:42:20And as an added plus, you'll get another Palm Pre Plus free, both after $100 mail-in rebate debit card. Get the 3G smartphone Verizon made even smarter. Now on the network with the most 3G coverage. Visit Verizon Wireless, verizonwireless.com, or call 1-800-2-JOIN-IN. Both phones require new two-year activation on a voice plan with data pack $29.99 or higher. Early termination and other feeds apply. Coverage details at verizonwireless.com. Hi, this is Jack, founder of Jack in the Box. Let's go to Ron on line one. Ron. Yeah, what happened? You called my radio show. This is Jack Box. Right. Sorry, Jack. I'm a little out of it. See, okay, you've caused an internal meat conflict inside of me. Ron, I'm pretty sure neither one of us knows what you're talking about. Okay, right. The thing is, I can't decide which of your new grilled sandwiches I like better, the turkey, bacon, cheddar, or the deli trio. Okay. I mean, I love the whole new grilled sandwich thing with the toasted bread, so one has roasted turkey and bacon, but the other, roasted turkey, sliced ham, and salami. Well, they're both delicious. I know, man. I'm torn. There's like a civil war going on inside the country of Ron right now, and I'm not sure which side I should join. Ron? Yeah.

3:43:27You've got some bigger issues, buddy. But right now, I need to turn it over to Tracy Alvarez, a real-life crew member from Austin, Texas. Try Jack's new grilled sandwiches, the turkey bacon cheddar, or the Deli Trio. And on Tuesday, February 23rd only, get one free with the purchase of a large drink. One offer per person at participating restaurants. Stay tuned for a million-bottle giveaway announcement. Do you have troubled skin? Acne? Well, against the better judgment of our management team, we're going to prove to you once and for all that Proactiv works. So if you want to try it, give us a call. because we're going to let a million people try Proactiv and receive our legendary refining face mask free if you call right now. You heard it. Be one of the first callers and you'll receive a 60-day trial of Proactiv Solution risk-free plus a free refining face mask when you call 1-800-244-1946. Proactiv's combination therapy system uses prescription-grade acne medicine and soothing spa quality botanicals to create a powerful acne-fighting system. It's so effective it transforms blemishes and bumps into clear, smooth skin. You can have beautiful, healthy-looking skin. Put us to the test and we'll prove it. Get your risk-free 60-day

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3:47:56They didn't even say, it was on CNN, they didn't even say what building it is. But a small plane has crashed into a building in Austin on, I don't have the name of the street. 183. 183 is the highway. The highway? Well, it's totally blocked up, yeah. Man. Traffic everywhere. The traffic in Austin is murder anyway. The smoke is unreal. Now, obviously, no one knows what the deal is. Nope. Whether or not it's a... You know, whether or not it's a terrorist act or what it is. They just updated it. Now we're back to the building where the plane crashed into it. This is the Echelon office complex. What do you got, Sienna? Well, I just clicked on CNN when I was here five minutes ago. They didn't have anything. Now it just said it's official. The pilot purposely crashed into the building. Wow. Yeah. Fire officials say one person at this point is unaccounted for, and two people have been taken to the hospital. Of course, we're going to bring you more information as it comes into us, but it's a very fluid situation, so stick with us because we're getting more information all the time.

3:48:57It says the pilot of the plane had set his house on fire beforehand, then stole the plane and crashed it intentionally. Suicide attempt, maybe? I don't know. But witnesses say they saw people hanging from the windows crying for help. Oh, man. Brings back some bad memories. Yeah, it did not look good. Well, we'll update you. I crashed into a building in the Texas Capitol. Yeah, in Austin. I was praying for those families. Yeah. It was very sad. Very sad. And they did, yeah, before, you know, like 20 minutes ago, we didn't really know what the deal is. Now they're saying it was. Now there's a lot more coming out. A lot more coming out. So we will give you the information as we get it. Now this next one actually ends good. This next story that we're going to give you, it actually does end good. It was a 911 operator. He's working his shift, doing the 911, gets a phone call.

3:50:02He's training to be a 911 operator. Training to be? 23 years old. A Marine reservist. Takes a call from his own wife. Coincidentally. Because their baby is choking. Now the baby's okay. Want to put that out there. Everything's fine. But imagine being a 911 operator and taking that call. Choking on something. Who is? Take off. When Jana Scott called 911 in a panic as her son choked on a small piece of plastic, a familiar voice answered the phone. Her husband, who's training to be an emergency operator, coolly and calmly, Chris Scott talked to his wife. What does his skin look like? Normal. Is he breathing? No. The 23-year-old Marine reservist says it's in his nature to remain calm under stress. He's not doing anything. Okay, listen carefully. I'll tell you what to do next, okay? Okay. Put the heel of your hand and strike the back five times right between the shoulder blades. And this is his son. Wow. That's nails, dude. That is nails, dude. Do that and come back to the phone, okay? He's breathing again. Really good job, all right? He knows that's his wife at this point. He has to, sure. Yeah, she was like, Chris, Chris. Whoa. It was really good for me to have him on the line.

3:51:32And, you know, I trust him, and I know he knows what he's doing. It's really amazing. I never thought it was going to happen. I was always, in the back of my mind, a little bit afraid that would happen, like a family member needing help. What would you do? Wow. What would you do if it was your own family? How would I handle it? It wasn't until the call was completed that Chris Scott's trainer realized the call involved his wife and child. He was immediately sent home to be with his family. Myra Lopez, The Associated Press. Wait a minute. So, no, what happened, what they're saying is Chris was being trained. So his trainer was watching Chris on the phone, had no idea. He was talking to his wife because he remained so calm. So then he was like, he said to the trainer, like, hey, that was my wife. That was my wife. My son was choking. I just saved him. Wow. And the trainer was like, oh my gosh, go home. See, in my former company, they would have made us work out the day. Right. Just finish the day and you can go see her at five. Dude, when they let him go home, they should have said, by the way, you don't have to come back. You pass. Yeah, you're in. You're in. I think you're okay, man. You're in. Wow, dude. Isn't that insane?

3:52:32It's a pretty nutty story. Very cool. Let's see. Serena Williams. I love it. Has enrolled in what? Sex camp. Everyone try to guess what Serena Williams may be doing now. Sex camp. Sex camp. It's not sex camp. It's sex rehab. Oh, I thought it was sex camp. It's sex rehab. That's what Tiger Woods is. Oh, I thought it was at sex camp. I decided to be a counselor. All right. Well, as soon as she was done at the Australia Open, she came home and decided that. She has a passion in her life, and she's ready to start fulfilling it. Really? So she signed up for some classes to do something, and I'm not satisfied with your guesses, so just give me a couple more. Serena Williams. Seamstress. No, but you're on the right track. Fashion designer. Same thing. Knitting. No. Crochet. Okay, let me tell you. CPR instructor. Croquet. No. Equestrian. You have a question? It has to do with beauty. An esthetician. Close. Hair salon.

3:53:31Close. Nails. Oh, my gosh. You're kidding. She has enrolled at the Palm Beach Nail School after a lifelong love of nail art. Yes, she's even blogged about it. She is doing a 240-hour course. Question. What? What's nail art? You know what nail art is? It's pedicures. Oh, really? Because I have it on my toenails. How do I know what nail art is? Because you got two facials last weekend. That's true. That is true. And if you don't believe me, here is not a very good picture of Serena giving someone a pedicure at her school in uniform. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. And she's the good one. She has like 11 titles. She's the really good one. Yeah. They're both great, but she's the really good one. Can you imagine if she had Wimbledon and they wouldn't give her the day off and she's like, I can't go. I can't go. It's like Derek Jeter going to be a barber. Yeah. I think it's cool. Nobody will take my shift. I have to work. I think it's cool. But you're in the finals. I have to work. I can't. I have to work. I don't like looking at those toes. Mr. Lee said I had to be. Can't do it. I have to. I haven't perfected the French pedicure yet. Un-Frenching pedicure? No. French. What is nail art?

3:54:44It's just design, like painting toenails. Hillary just walked in. Hillary, do you get your nails? Do you get toenails and fingernails? Do I get them did? Do you get them did? I like a good pedicure, but that's about it. Will you ever do the artsy stuff on there? You don't get diamonds and stuff? Maybe when I was like 20. I get the flowers sometimes. Maybe for prom. Is that the drawing on there? You get a little flower. Yeah, because they offer it every time. Every time you're getting there, they're always trying to upsell you, and they're like, do you want a little flower? How much is a flower? It's like three bucks. How would you do flowers? Why would you? For Christmas time, I always get a little candy cane. Oh my gosh, really? On your fingernails? You are my grandma. Maybe a little holly. A poinsettia. You and everyone's grandmother. Maybe a little present on the one. On all of your fingernails? A snowman? Maybe I'll get that next year. It's the ten days of Christmas on our hands? You get one painted on... One nail. Like a big toe gets one. Really? Or your middle finger and your hand gets one. Really? Just a little accent. You can't get all crazy on all of them. Usually only one gets it. Maybe two. Wow. Lauren, do you get... You're welcome. Do you get like little barley plants? Pot leaves. Pot leaves. Poppy seeds? No. I've been guilty of getting the flower. Have you? From time to time. I haven't in a long time, but...

3:56:04Just daisies everywhere. They're beautiful. Beads, like pictures of beads. I get Budweiser on mine. Marlboros. I like when they paint the flower petals and then they put a little diamond in the middle. Yeah, me too. I have rerun from what's happening on my big toe. You are rerun from what's happening when you look in the mirror. Was. You were when you were Michael Shannon. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. I'll never forget that image. That will be in my movie, by the way. That'll be in my movie. Dude, that's me Halloween this year. Yes. Halloween this year. You can be Raj. I will be Reran. I will be Reran. I will be Reran. Oh, man. There is a picture of Serena Williams, one of the greatest tennis players in the world ever. at nailed school. I think it's cool. Do you? Here's the thing. There's nothing wrong with that profession. If that's what she wanted to do, then... Nothing wrong with the profession. I'm just telling you, it's weird. I'm just telling you, that is one of the last... Did you hear about Sean Merriman? What's he doing? He's a mechanic now. He's going to be a mechanic. I want to work on some carburetors. I want to change tires. I would think that's cool. Here's the thing.

3:57:17I don't want to touch people's feet. No way. But somebody's got to do it. That's fine, but she enjoys it. She enjoys it. Yeah. I'm just saying, she enjoys it. That's great. Her hands smell like Fritos all the time. What a show. What a show. What a show. That one did not go over well. She has 12 single titles. Hey, you've got to have a plan B if you're a pro athlete. She doesn't need a plan B. She's at the top of her game. She's a millionaire. You've got to have a plan B. She'll be okay. Tom Brady, do you hear what he's doing? What? He's a zookeeper. He's a beekeeper. He's a beekeeper. He's had a passion for beekeeping his whole life, and he's finally decided he's going to make pollen and honey. He's the two things in the world that he's wanted to do his whole life. Lovely and talented. Oh, my gosh. Oh, I want a pedicure now from Serena Williams. Lovely and talented. Hillary is up next. We're all going to go get our nails did. Many petty. That's right. Whoa. Jeepsie.

3:58:23It's not planned. Tomorrow at 6. Mikey Show will be back. Late.