The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 02/28/12
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
american footballheisman trophydogfightingbullfightinggolfmiddle east tensionsstock marketnascarmount everestjerry sanduskybowler memelava giveaway
The show opened with a lengthy bit about Robert Griffin III's Heisman win that devolved into jokes about Jay's supposedly small penis. Hosts then debated RG3 versus Michael Vick, discussed animal‑cruelty topics like bullfighting and dogfighting, and recounted Jay's infamous golf‑fairway peeing incident. Later segments covered geopolitical fears over Israel/Iran, stock‑market magic numbers, the Daytona 500 jet‑dryer crash, a light‑hearted chat about Dolly Madison and Lauren O'Brien's engagement ring, the 'lava' word‑of‑the‑day giveaway, and a breakdown of the cost to climb Mount Everest.
What happened, in order
RG3 Heisman & Jay's Dong Jokes
The hosts chant RG3's Heisman win while mocking Jay's supposedly small penis and claiming it explains his sports ignorance.
Michael Vick vs RG3 Debate
They compare RG3 to Michael Vick, arguing RG3 will have a longer NFL career because he won't be involved in illegal dogfighting.
Bullfighting vs Dogfighting Opinions
Woods argues bullfighting is worse than dogfighting, while others discuss personal feelings about animal cruelty and their own dogs.
Golf Fairway Peeing Incident
Jay pees on a golf fairway between two carts, Woods sees his wiener and describes it as a skinny dong, leading to jokes about size.
Israel/Iran Tension Sparks Gas Fear
Discussion of Israel's possible preemptive strike on Iran causing fear-driven gas price spikes and market overreaction.
Dow Jones Magic Number 13,000
Explanation that the Dow must close above 13,000 three times to signal a real bull market, with Apple stock used as an example.
Daytona 500 Jet Dryer Crash
Juan Pablo Montoya loses control and crashes into a jet dryer truck, causing a two‑hour delay with 40 laps left in the race.
Dolly Madison & Lauren's Ring
The crew chats about James Madison being a short president, Dolly Madison bringing ice cream to the U.S., and Lauren O'Brien forgetting her engagement ring.
Word of the Day Lava Wins NASCAR Tickets
Mikey announces the word of the day is 'lava'; caller nine who hears it wins a four‑pack to the NASCAR Nationwide Series at Auto Club Speedway.
Mount Everest Cost Breakdown
Woods says climbing Everest safely costs at least $35,000 in a group or $60,000 solo, sparking debate about the value of the feat.
People mentioned
Robert Griffin IIIJayWoodsMikeyLauren O'BrienNicoleMichael VickSasha Baron CohenRyan SeacrestDonald TrumpJimmy FallonBrian WilliamsKobe BryantJerry Sandusky
31,841 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
He won the Heisman. He won the Heisman. He won the Heisman. If you have a dong, you should know who RG3 is. It's a true story. I bet you that Jay does not. Jay has never. But he has a thin, really thin dong. Dong. So, we gotta give him a break. If he didn't have such a skinny donger. Wrinkled, grayish. Donger. Donger. It's officially the reason he doesn't know anything about sports. Yes. Yes. Yeah, he just squinted at us because he knows we're talking about him. Can you hear us? You can? Oh, gosh. Oh, wow. Now he can. Now he can. Let's ask him. When he gets to the microphone, I'm going to ask him who the person is. Wait for him. It's a thousand percent chance he does not know. I guarantee you. What do you need? Who is Robert Griffin III?
Oh, Robert Griffin III. He's right after the second. Yeah. He is a race car driver. Oh, he's a huge basketball player. Plays for football. Golfer. Bowler. Filled hockey? What's filled hockey? What else can he do? He's a horseback rider. He's a jockey. Well, you said it, but... I wanted more specific. He is a football player. Oh, a football player. And he's the Heisman Trophy winner. And Wood said, if you have a dong, you should know who Robert Griffin III is. It's true. And I think that is a true story. It is not. It is. It is. I believe that he is a ticket seller. Oh, there is.
No question. You want to go see that dude play football. What position is he? He's a quarterback. He's a quarterback. But he is Michael Vick-like. Yeah. Maybe more? They ran about the same 40 at the Combine. And look, Michael Vick. Talent-wise. Talent-wise. Equal? Or is Michael Vick, you think he was better coming out? Vick has that cannon of an arm, but he's got that weird long throwing motion. speed threat. When all is said and done, who do you think will be better in the NFL? Well, I don't think RG3 is the dogfighting type, so I think that he'll actually get to play his entire career. And that's not me being a D. He isn't. No! I'm saying, in fact... Well, I mean, he said, in the end, who's going to be better? Look, RG3's going to have more years because he's not going to be running an illegal dogfighting ring. That you know of. No, he won't be. I can unequivocally say that RG3 will not be running an illegal dog fighting ring out of his home in Atlanta. I promise you. Listen, Michael Vick can go like this. He can call Woods personally and go like this. I am personally sorry. Please forgive me. I say absolutely not. He would call you and he'd go, Hi, who's this? This is Michael Vick. The Michael Vick? Yes, the Michael Vick.
What do you want? I know that you don't like me because of what I did. Right. And I want you to know that I'm ashamed of what I did. Are you? I am. Are you? Listen, when I was growing up, that awful... Are you going to justify this now? You're going to justify what you did? You're just better off saying you're sorry and hanging up the phone, Mike. Vic. Wait. You're not going to play any music behind it to make me feel bad, okay? I'm telling you. I know now I was wrong, and I'm sorry. Will you ever forgive me? No. But it ain't me you got to worry about, okay? It's the souls of those innocent dogs. That's true. That you need to worry about attacking you in your sleep, my friend. How beautiful is this music? It is beautiful. It's gorgeous. Gosh, darn. Maybe I'll watch those movies again. Book of Eli? No. No? Well, the first one was Book of Eli, yes. What was that one? The rest of them are from 21 Grams.
Babble. The movie Babble. And also Amores Peros. The three movies that guy did. The dog fighting. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Amores Peros. Hey, and they make that guy into a villain. As they should. Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, he's a villain. As they should. Yeah. And, well, it is bad. Yes. Yes. It's very bad. Now, when I was growing up, it was cool. It's not cool. It's never cool. When I was growing up, it was cool. It's never been cool. Yeah. No, never been cool. It's cool like fighting was cool. Fighting's cool. Fighting's not cool. Like skin fighting, like hand-on-hand combat's cool. Is there any difference between pit bull fighting for you and cock fighting? It's a good question. It doesn't bother me as bad because I don't own roosters. Yeah, you wouldn't let a rooster sleep in your bed. That's true. I would not cuddle with a rooster. Still. It's just as bad, but not for you. It's not as bad for me personally, because I don't own C-words. You could have just said roosters. You really could have. I was about to say it, and I go, nah, I can't say it. Say roosters. I don't like seeing that, though. I don't like seeing bullfights.
Yeah, where do you stand on bullfights? I'm out on it. I'm all the way out on it. And do you think that bullfighting is the same as dogfighting? I think it's possibly even a little worse. Okay. Rarely do I question your sincerity. I'm telling you the truth. I'm telling you the truth. I think that you undeniably think dogfighting is way worse than bullfighting. You know, I know that bullfighting, here's what I know about bullfighting. A centuries old tradition in Spain. I know that. In Mexico. Yeah. Dog fighting touches me personally because I have seven dogs. Yeah. So I can't imagine them going through that. Now, if I owned a bull, if I owned a bull, I'd probably be just as upset about it. Here's why when I was growing up, I grew up in Yuma, Arizona, which bordered a town called Somerton. And Somerton was right on the border.
To a city called San Luis, which was in Mexico. And the reason that dog fighting was so cool when I was growing up was because these were vicious animals. And they're bred that way. These were vicious dogs. And so to see two vicious dogs take each other on is like the equivalent of a couple of gladiators. getting it on sure and i think that it wasn't yorkies no i know going after one another but i think that all dogs are inherently sweet and want to please and i think they're trained to be vicious for sure now and star when i was and i'm telling you when i was seven years old i did not know that all i knew was that pit bulls were vicious like killers right and to see them they look even muscular They look like fighters. They are built like brick-ass houses, dude. So to see them get it on. I mean, listen, when I was a kid and two dogs fought in the neighborhood, it was badass to watch. There was nothing about me that was like, yeah, seriously. I mean, I know some people go, oh, my gosh. When I was growing up, kids would, like, gather. That was a spectacle. Yeah. I laugh. I mean, when Sonny gets real.
I have to break them up, but I laugh because they're mine and they're tiny. Now that I've gotten old, it took me to grow up and go out into the world to hear, hey, dude, you know this is morally incomprehensible. And I was like, it is? I knew it was illegal. For that cat, Mr. Multi-Million Dollar Contract to be doing that stuff. And making money off of it was just very deplorable, I thought. Good quarterback, though. The good news is all dogs go to heaven. That is true. All dogs do go to heaven. That is a true story. Little angels. And we got off on that topic because we were talking about RG3. Kid is a stud. Robert Griffin III. Now, who's he again, Jay? He is a football player. What did he win? The Heisman. There you go. He got it now. He won the Heisman Trophy, and he is as athletic. As it gets. He'll be the number two pick in the draft. Really? Absolutely. Absolutely. Numero dos. Numero dos behind Andrew Luck, who's going to go to Indianapolis almost 100%. 99.9% sure they're going to take Luck. And then RG3, somebody's going to have to trade the Rams, who have the second pick. Rams don't need a quarterback. They have Sam Bradford. And they're going to have to trade and get RG3. And a cool name. It's probably going to be Cleveland.
Which, I mean, it's a career killer almost. If you're a quarterback, you go to Cleveland. But if anybody can do it, I think he can. Who's he going to throw to? I don't know. Massaquah? Joshua Cribs? Joshua Cribs and Massaquah. Right. I don't know his first name. But he's a guy that can tuck the ball and run, too. You've tucked. I've tucked. I've tucked back. Can you run? I've tucked and danced. For your wife. For my wife. It makes her laugh. She loves it. You city sausage. Has your man ever done that trick? No. He's never tucked for you? You've never either? No. Oh, you guys are weird. Oh, absolutely. I don't want to see it. You've done that to Kim? Oh, you have to tuck, yeah. You have to tuck. Does it make her laugh? Oh, yeah. She laughs. I helicopter. I do the whole nine yards. Helicopter. Helicopter. Oh, gosh. I do that, too. Yeah. You can. Red's watch.
We all can. Woods can. I can. Even you can with your little tiny helicopter. Your tiny propeller. Yeah. Listen, I'm open about my tiny propeller. And listen, by tiny, I mean it's just a normal one. I'm not a porn star. Oh, no. None of us are. Okay. Well, Woods kind of is. You've never seen it. I'll show it to you. No, but I do believe him. I believe him. I mean, I don't think a guy talks about having a giant hog unless he has a giant hog. I really don't. Plenty of guys have talked about having a giant hog. I want to show it to him. But Woods. No, no, no, no, no, no. You all should have just a revealing party with each other. Yeah. Well. Can we plump it before we cook it? One time, one time playing golf together. One time Woods and Jay were playing golf together. And they were on one of the holes. The fairway. On the fairway. Was there any other people around? Yeah, absolutely. There were listeners with us. And Jay decided that he was going to pee on the fairway. Yeah, in the middle of the fairway. Very normal. It's not normal. Behind one of the cart. The cart. Actually, between two carts. Yeah, between two carts.
Woods was on his cell phone at the time. Weird. Walked around to talk. Oh, don't try to detract. He's deflecting and detracting. Oh, it's so weird. He was screaming. Fair enough. Okay. Okay. Doesn't take away from the fact of what you did. Yes. Peeing on the golf course. And so Woods walks around the corner and sees Jay's wiener. Yep. True story. And Woods says that he was holding it like a praying mantis. There's no reason for that. Stretching it. Which there is no reason for that. There's no reason to go wee-wee with two hands. I was holding my pants back. He wasn't holding his pants. Just like this. You weren't holding your pants back. He wasn't holding his pants. He was holding each side of it. I will swear on a bike. And stretching it. That doesn't mean anything. Not coming from you. That is true. Good point. Stretching it out. Nobody stretches it out. You do. And Woods said it was a skinny dong. It was skinny. And Jay says. It's huge. It plumps when you cook it. It plumps when you cook it. But no, it's not wrinkly. It's like a Vienna sausage. It's like those baby... It's nicknamed the pleaser. It's like baby food. By who? It's nicknamed... By you? The pleaser. Hey. Unbelievable. By guinea pigs. Right. Gross. Disgusting. Actually, a guinea pig's like...
Seem bigger. You have? All right. You did look at it longingly. I had never seen a man treat himself that way on the middle of the fairway ever. You've got a little smile on your face. I've never seen it. Your eyes glazed over. All right, so. Disgusting. So check this out. Israel said, we're not going to give you the heads up if we're going to bomb. How do you go from Jace Dong to Israel? He's a master. Because I can. They're both a master. I'll tell you how, because I can. Yeah, Israel said to the United States, we're not going to give you the heads up if we want to bomb Iran. Perfect. You know why they're not going to give us a heads up? Because we'd tell Iran. Right. We'd warn them. And Israel's like, we don't want, you know, no. It's about to get nasty. It's going to get nasty over there. Yeah. It is going to get nasty. And it doesn't, it doesn't look like it's going to take long either. See, because.
Israel knows they are very close in Iran. And whether or not they really mean it that they'll bomb Iran is irreverent. Irreverent. They will take a preemptive strike. If that happens, oh boy. Great. Because gas has already gone up because of fear. I read it this morning. It's gone up because of fear. Nothing real. You know, all they did, all Iran did was say, we're not going to sell oil to France and we're not going to sell oil to Britain. Great. It's only 2% of the oil they get anyway. But it was enough to cause fear. It did. The markets always overreact to fear. And they did. By the way, Wall Street blowing up yesterday. The magic number for, I'll teach you this if you don't know anything about the stock market.
And I just learned it recently. The magic number is 13,000 for the Dow Jones Industrial Average. Right. When it reaches 13,000, you usually have health. Now, back when everything was crashing in 2008, 2009, it's about 7,000. That's where the Dow Jones was. And it was really scary. They said it was really, really scary that it was that low. Now, what they also say. As a general rule of thumb is that it has to break that point three times before it's real. So in other words, let's say the Dow Jones is at 12,900. And today it goes to 13,500. Somewhere around there. It's bouncing all day long. The next day it does not break 13,000. The next day it doesn't break 13,000. The next day it doesn't break 13,000. The next day it does. The next week it does it again.
Chances are on that third time, it's not going down again. Back down for a while. For a long while. Yeah, usually it's there. So it feels like it's kind of priming the pump. And it's like that with most stocks. So the same bit with Apple. Let's say Apple went to $540 today. Well, great. That's not what it's going to be. Right. And if it does it three times, it's probably there. Yeah. And it ain't going away. Which that Apple stock, holy cow, yesterday it hit $528. Which made me think, I think that insiders know something. Insiders know something we don't know. Apple TV. Yeah, it's coming. ITV. It's coming. That new iPad. Maybe it's just that they're going, hey, we know a new iPad has to come along. Sure. And a new iPod and a new iPhone and a new Apple TV. And I mean, dude, their products are second to none. I can improve the iPod. You want to know how? How? If you use the iPod in your car, how do you use it? I have this stupid plug-in thing to my cigarette lighter. The auxiliary? The auxiliary. Well, it's not a cable. This thing is like this big, bulky, awkward deal that plugs in and then my iPod sits on top of it. So it charges too? Yeah. Charges. Is it?
Is it attached to the radio frequency or is it attached to the radio frequency? How about you, L.O.B.? Mine goes right through the auxiliary cable. Okay, that's what I'm talking about. That is the way that a lot of people do it. That's the way I do it. Through an auxiliary cable. Here's the problem. They've created the cloud, which is badass. Because the cloud means that no matter how many... You got... 14,000 songs in your home computer, you now have 14,000 songs on your phone. You now have 14,000 songs on any mobile device that you have. Your iPad, an iPod Touch, you know where you don't have it? Your iPod. Yeah, because you've got to sync with where your home iTunes is. If you could use your iPod Like your iPhone? Yes. Like if I was in the gym and I was on the elliptical and I go, I want to hear freaking Deftones. Yes. Whatever. And download it right there. Done. Dude. Done. Right. You just need like a wireless or a 3G or something. Yes. Or iPod. Done. Yes. But I bet you the price of it would go way up. Because you can get them for nothing. Apple will do this. It's coming. It'll eventually happen. Right. It has to. It has to happen. Because, dude, how rad is that?
And they will market it just like you just said. They'll do a cool song, and they'll show somebody in the gym that, and they'll do it silently. There won't be any words. There will just be, all there's going to be is really hip music, and they're going to show somebody on a treadmill, and they're going to pick up their iPod, and they're going to press a button, and the button is going to say, Rihanna. I don't know. L.O.B., do you know a good dance song by? S.O.S. Rihanna. And they type in S.O.S. And it comes up and they click download. And people will drop their jaws and go, I can be in the gym and download any song I want. Yep. In. Absolutely. In a heartbeat. Me too. In your car. Yep. I know that's bad, but anyway. 570-194-9. I think that's what's coming next. So the stock market right now.
We had this guy on named Joe Terranova. It's good. Do you know? So I wrote down all the stuff he said. He was right. Yeah. About all of it. It sounded like he knew what he was talking about. He was right about all of it. So I'll even share some of it with you right now. One of the things that should be invested in is a company called Occidental Petroleum. O-X-Y. Occidental Petroleum. They're going nowhere but up, according to this guy, Joe Terranova. Now, he was right. He said it, and man, if anybody did what he said at that time, he was right. Also, there's a stock called an ETF that is a safety net against inflation. So if there's inflation in this country, which there is, you know there is, this is a safety net against it. It's investing in gold.
It's called IAU. That's the stock symbol. We'd love to have him on again, but that guy isn't so much in demand. He has contractual deals and stuff, but I follow him on Twitter, and the dude is legit. So I'll give you the word of the day, which today is going to be good for Auto Club Speedway tickets. NASCAR's coming to Montana. And we'll give you tickets for the word of the day. Don't go anywhere. It's the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Save big on indoor and outdoor projects at Lowe's. Right now, get 10% off all major appliances, $299 or more. Plus, get 18 months special financing on major appliances, flooring, and kitchen cabinet and countertop purchases of $599 or more when you use your Lowe's Consumer Credit Card now through March 4th. And when you buy your next two treatments of Scott's Fertilizer, you'll get 20% off both bags instantly.
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Well, the freeways look pretty good. We're back to normal. Not a lot going on. A little slowing here on the 67 northbound Mapleview Street, Winter Garden Boulevard, about 40 miles an hour. Also, a slight delay as you travel on to the 15 northbound at the 8 West. You've got about 39 miles an hour. And heading over here on the 8 westbound at Sunset Clips Boulevard, it's down to 29 miles an hour. This report brought to you by Firestone Complete Auto Care. Get new tires at Firestone Complete Auto Care's February event. Buy three Firestone Affinity touring tires for your car. Get the fourth free. See your store for details. Call 1-800-LOCATE-US for the Firestone Complete Auto Care near you. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't know the difference between odd and even. Lauren. If there's a movie with Meg Ryan in it, I'm like, I'm out. I'm out. Woods. I got one word for you, dude. Yeah. And Jay. I stole from the Rolling Stones dressing room. I got this little coffin thing. I stole it from there on FM 94.9. The Mikey Show is on from 530 to 9 a.m. And open phones. You can call us right now. 570-1949. We will take your calls. I am feeling better today physically. Not as...
Dainty, as I was feeling yesterday. Still on pain meds. Still have no gallbladder. Yeah, still gone. Gallbladder's still out. It's still gone. He's out. Yes. Partying on the town. That's right. But doing a little bit better. You can call us, 570-1949. Open phones. And we got an update on the Ohio school shooting. Yeah, I was printing you the story, but do you want me to print it? Yeah, yeah. I'll print it. Our printer takes about 45 minutes to print one document. I know it. It's a pain. So I'll give you that by about 650. You know. Chardon High School is the name of it. It's a suburb of Cleveland, and the shooter has been identified as another kid named T.J. Lane. Did you see any of the pictures of this guy? I saw him. Terrifying. Really? Terrifying kid. I mean, just. Looks, I mean, you know, whatever. But he looks like a terrifying dude. Well, it was early yesterday in everything in the reporting. But they said that, you know, these were not random. That it was, that he knew who he was after. Oh, gosh. He had had a very, very active and evil sort of Facebook page. Yeah. About saying stuff about death and death is coming and I'm the killer and weird. He's a weird, weird cat. Yeah, very sad, man.
I hate those things. Yeah. Well, we'll give you an update because it was so sad. One student was killed, four other wounded, two of them really critically, and Wood said that another kid died. Yeah, the second victim has actually passed away. He was brain dead this morning and has passed away today. Just freaking brutal. Don't know the motive or anything? No. Just a pretty jacked up kid. His parents had just gone through divorce and he was, you know, having some mental issues, I guess, and some getting a little bit of trouble and just snapped. And I read this morning that he's very remorseful. So, whatever that does for you. Don't do much for the family. No, no. Doesn't do much for them at all. Doesn't do much for the families. That is so sad. But we're going to make you laugh today. We got stuff that will make you laugh today. We got good... We got some good material lined up. Yep. Woodsy has, apparently they did run a race. They did. The Daytona 500, the Super Bowl of NASCAR did go off yesterday. I think it went off about 7 p.m. Eastern. Now, it took a while.
There was a big wreck. There were a couple big wrecks, but there was actually a two-hour delay with 40 laps to go. Juan Pablo Montoya, who is Mikey's favorite driver, he lost control of his car and crashed into a jet dryer truck. Oh, wow. So then they had to dry a bunch of stuff off the track. They had to clean everything up. Two-hour delay with 40 laps to go. Just because I'm Hispanic doesn't mean that I'm Hispanic. You love Juan Pablo Montoya. It's all I hear, Juan Pablo Montoya, Juan Pablo Montoya. Here is the race call, the end of the race. Ford Chevrolet off the final corner. Matt Kenseth trying to win it for the second time. Here comes Junior to the outside. Side by side with Kenseth. He runs it. Kenseth wins. Almost. Second place. Oh, wow. I know. Oh, my gosh. I know. Will he ever live up to that name? I don't think so. Never, right? It's dad. Daddy. It's like being Michael Jordan's kid. Oh, my gosh. You know? Hey, I can hoop. He's pretty good. He ain't your dad, pal. All right? And imagine your name's Michael Jordan. Right. Junior. Junior. Yep. Gosh.
Well, here is Matt Kenseth after the race, very excited about getting that done. Well, Matt Kenseth, earlier in this race, when that engine was spewing water, did you think you had any chance to win the Daytona 500? Not really. We had a lot of problems. We had the engine spew out water, and we had a little bit of fuel problem. We lost a tachometer, we lost our radios, and I couldn't talk. I could hear them, so that was good for them guys. What a great race. I really need to thank Greg Biffle. He did a great job working with me today. We both had really fast rockets. I think it's just ended up who was in front of the end. He does all his sponsors. I also thank Sprint, Best Buy, Zest, Ford Motor Company, Valvoline, Gatorade, and Citizen Watches. I appreciate all their support. And I can't believe we're standing here twice in one week. Is there a happier man in America right now than you? There might be, but I don't know where he is. It's like Clay Aiken. Danica Patrick ran her first Daytona and finished 38th out of 42. It was 30 cars, and she finished 38th. 42 cars, she finished 38th. She did beat Kurt Busch. He finished the race, she finished the race. She had an early wreck, but recovered. If you want to hear some Danica Patrick audio, I've got some of that for you, too. Honestly, I think that I picked up a lot of good tips.
I just wish that the beginning of the race could have been a nice single file line like it was when I got back out there, but it wasn't. And honestly, that's my lesson to learn, maybe, is that just right off that first little bit if you're not up front. So, unfortunately, we got another crash go-daddy car, but just like the last time, it did finish the race, but just in that darn 38th position. Hmm, 38th. That is not a good place to be. It actually finished 38th of 39. People that finish the race. Oh. Sorry about that. How do you feel about being Kurt Busch today? On this day 29 years ago, 77% of American televisions watched the last episode of MASH. Yep. 29 years ago today. I remember it. Oh, yeah. My family did. We were part of that 77%. My family had it on. Woods, you had to be a little kid. Us too. You say 77? 1983. Oh, wow. No, I was older than that. What a great show. 1983. Could that be right? I guess it was. Yeah. I don't remember it. I just remember every time I saw MASH on TV, it would make me mad. Me too. But I must have been watching reruns. Yeah, we saw reruns later. Yeah. After Three's Company. Yeah. And I would be like, ugh.
Stupid mash. No, Rerun was a different show. That was what's happening. I love that show. That show's brilliant. Raj. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. I am gallbladderless in a little bit of pain. And look like Rerun. That's our friendship. Identical Rerun. Identical Rerun. Well, you are. In his defense, you're wearing a beret. Yeah. It's suspended right now. Big baggy pants. Why do you have your Rerun beret on? I don't. You do? Yeah. Do the dance. Oh, yeah. Look at him go, Mikey. Go. I'm not dancing. He's dancing. He's dancing. I'm not dancing. Woods is the guy that is putting in a dip of snuff. He is 36 years of age and a big Notre Dame fan. Oh, yeah. Dad played there. Lauren O'Brien went to a smaller college called something Marshall. Nope. No. James Madison. James Madison. The M. Presidential.
That's right. He was a president? He was. Very short president. Oh, boy. That was directed. No. That's about the only thing I know that stands out about him. That and his wife pretty much almost is credited with bringing ice cream to the U.S. All right. Dolly Madison. Dolly Madison. Sure you're into that, too, Mike? Little angel. Is he your favorite president, Mike? Short and ate ice cream all the time? Lauren O'Brien. She is a... 31 years of age and recently engaged. Where is the... I know. I left the house in a hurry and I forgot to put my ring on. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. What? What? I know. What? Is everything okay? Yeah, everything's great. Now, I have a little ring holder next to my bed and I just take it on and off. And you know me. Yeah. Forget everything. I looked over there and I didn't see that ring and I was like, where is that ring? No. Where's that rock? Excuse me? It is a rock. It's a rock. Well, rock is anchored. You're sans rock today. I know. I'm going to forget all the time. Hey, you know what that means. What? You're single. Yeah. You can do whatever you want. I've only had the ring on for like a week. Yeah, but it's not on. You're single. We also have a gal named Nicole that is screening phones for us. How old are you, Nicole? 22. 22.
And she will take your phone calls right now, 570-1949. So if you want to call us, you can. She will be the one that answers. You can text in 949mikey at gmail.com. Oh, no. Yeah, Jay, sometimes, yeah, it's her first day. First day, and Jay is just a creep. Makes me uncomfortable. You have to look at her. Don't do that again, please. You have to look at her. Jay. Oh, wow. No, no, no. I mean it. Don't. Bring on the bigger. Oh, man. I want to go home already. Oh, poor Nicole. On this day 19 years ago, in 1993, the feds raided the Branch Davidian compound. Waco. In Waco, Texas. That will get you, dude. Yes, it will. That was crazy. That was crazy. Four ATF agents were killed. After a 45-minute firefight. Today's birthdays. Mario Andretti, 72. Driver. Yep. Bernadette Peters. Ooh. Jay. Oh, fantastic. Oh, you're crazy. What are you talking about? She is such a weirdo. She is beautiful. Very weird face. You have a fetish. She's beautiful. Wait, hold on. Let me make sure I get the right person. She was in 1932. Yeah. She and the jerk. Yeah. Dude.
Dude, I'll Google some pictures for you. She is a knockout. Yeah, 64 years old today. I wouldn't now. You're a creep. You're disgusting. I'd have to see what she looks like now, but back then? No! Even back then. There was no then. John Turturro, 55 today. Woods just gave a big thumbs down. Possibly the most overrated actor ever. Possibly. I will go with you. Possibly. I'll go along. I'll get on that train. That's horrible. Gilbert Gottfried is 57 years old today. And that bit never gets old, ever. Immediate channel change. Immediate. Oh, gosh. Wait a second. You're telling me. Yes. You're screaming at me, by the way. We're two feet from me. You're screaming. That guy can never speak at somebody's funeral. No.
He can't. Is any of it a bit? Well, of course it is. You think all of it's a bit? Really? Yes. Okay, so his friend Steve passes away, and he gets up there and he goes, listen, Steve was a great guy. Guaranteed. Guaranteed. Because then you have, what's his name, Bob Wildcat? Yeah, Gold. Bobcat Goldsway. Bobcat Goldsway. I think that was like the way back in the 80s. Yeah, it was. You came up with like a shtick. That was the comedic way. You had to have a wacky shtick. Howie Mandel suspenders and props. And blowing up a latex glove on his face using his nostrils. Gallagher just smashing watermelons real good. You had to have a bit. Ray Don Chong. Can't make up names. Yeah. No, it's true. Because you like the birthday bit doesn't mean you can just keep going. It's Tommy Chong's daughter. Yeah, it is. Tommy Chong's daughter. She did something real scandalous in a movie called Quest for Fire. She made love in a way that was showing you this is the way that cavemen made love. Quest for Fire. Yeah, I need to Google that. Well.
It's very uncomfortable in the movie theater because it was a film that I took my parents to see. Oh, that's right. Oh, no, Mike. Mowed a lot of lawns to earn the money to take my parents to see Quest for Fire. I was so proud. Who was in it with her? Do you remember? I think that was it. That was it? She was the big star? She was the big star, Radon Chong. That scene was quite uncomfortable. Yeah, they always are. Yeah. Yeah. She was in commando also. So, a little rain yesterday. A little? I'm a cedar, dude. A storm last night scared me to death. Oh, yeah, it spit rain, and it was a storm. Gosh, did you guys sleep? I couldn't sleep. It woke me up. I was like, is that hail? I thought it was hail. Maybe it was. And you guys are more coastal. Yeah. If you were inland, it was still rainy as all getup. I mean, just... pouring rain. I enjoyed it. Yeah, me too. I liked it until it was hitting the windows to the point that it was waking me up. Yeah, it's scary. Now, what they say today is it's going to be more rain in the morning, but then we might get some intermittent sunshine. That's the forecast. Crazy pictures of local mountains just covered in snow. Everybody had chains on. Wow. That sounds like your house on a Saturday. Absolutely. Everybody's chained up. Can't really complain. We've had an awesome February. Holy cow.
San Diego's really taking the brunt of the gas crunch. It's perfect. Yeah, we're the city that ranks amongst some of the highest in terms of what gas costs. It's the highest. Unleaded, the average here in San Diego. I saw that yesterday. $4.32. Dude. It's up from $4.07 a week ago, $3.75 a month ago, according to AAA. Over the weekend, they did a separate study found San Diego had the highest gas prices in the country. It's insane. Why? I don't know. Damn it. In conjunction with probably one of the worst public transportation systems for a city. Yes. And highest cause of housing in this country. I mean, it's up there. It's expensive to live here. Why do you suppose that we have the highest gas prices? I don't know. I don't even have a theory. No.
Maybe because they know we're a slave to it. We'll pay it. Well, everybody will pay it. You don't have a choice. Yeah, that's true. Well, you could take the train. You could be like, you know what? I'm going to take the train to work. But we actually can't. We can't. We can't. No, I'm sure there are people listening right now that go. The coaster's available. Ride a bike. Five times a day. Yeah, we're going to ride a bike 26 miles to work. Sounds like a plan. Be good for you. You should start doing it, Jay. Get up at midnight, Jay. You should get out on the 5 at 4 a.m. Come on, Jay. No, no, you go back roads. Back roads. Back. Rose. I want to see it. Katie, will you do it? Do it. Do it. No, he won't. I'll drive you home. All right. I'll drive you home. In the dark. Why do you mean? You know that is torturous to make a man. Why? Oh, I used to do it all the time. Well, first of all. At night, four o'clock in the morning. Yeah. He's got a 50-mile bike ride coming up. He needs to train. You are so cruel. In the dark. Hey, let's make him put his money where his mouth is for once. He'd have to leave his house at midnight. Yeah. To get here at four. Which would be. And I don't know that there are back roads from all the way up in North County to downtown Mission Valley where we are. Think about it. I would ride behind him in my suburban the entire time. He hates you right now. He hates you for even suggesting it. Yes. If it was regular hours, I would definitely do it. No, you wouldn't. No, you wouldn't. Oh, yeah. He used to ride my bike all the time. Okay. All the way down to Nashville City. Okay. Well, then let's do that. Let's have you do that. Right home?
I'll ride home any day. Yes. All right, done. Woods, that is gnarly. That's gnarly. It's far. I believe he'll do it. I used to do it from National City to my house up in Encinitas all the time. We did it like three times a week. Are you insane? On the beach? No, no. We'd climb Mount Sylladad up and then drop down through Del Mar. It was nice. Great ride. I believe that he did it. It was 30 plus miles. 30 miles. Not in the dark, though. That's a whole new ballgame. It still seems to me like climbing Mount Everest. Yeah. Which, by the way, if you do want to climb Mount Everest, start saving. We got a story about that. I mean, just you got to take a guess at what you think it costs to climb Mount Everest, which to me, that's like, hey, how much will it cost? How much do I have to give you? And then you punch me. I mean, truly. I would love to do it, but it just seems... You'd love to punch Mike or climb? Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. I'll do that for free. I'd love it. Oh, my God. You would, actually. I'd fantasize about it. Yeah, I've done it. If there was no consequence, he would punch you as hard as he could. I went, it'll be speaking of, I went to the store, bought a book that's blank, and I drew a cartoon of me doing it so that when I flip the pages...
I punch Mike in the face. And I'll sit there and flip them pages over and over and over. I had to rip the last one out because in the end his head popped off. I figured it was too much for my son Jasper to see. But he enjoys the rest of it. Humans despise me. Well, it's okay. It's okay. I didn't just say that. I have a loud cry. It's fine, dude. That's Jay playing close of me. I'm an animal. That's awful. You're not an animal. You're a human being. I know. I'm an animal. You're not. I'm an animal. You're not. That's Jay playing clips of me out of context. I can be trapped for my fur. I love the buzzer. Now that's true. That is true. The buzzer in the background. That's our buddy Jay. Well, when we come back, we're going to tell you how much it, you're going to flip out when you hear how much it costs you today. Climb Mount Everest. And we're going to play, what game are we doing today? Today is Catch Phrase. Let's play Catch Phrase. Call us right now. You're going to either take Team Fit, which is L-O-B-N-J, or Team Fat, which is me and Woods. And what's the prize? We have a pair of tickets to see Rise Against at the Viejas Arena, which is formerly known as the Cox Arena. Here it is. I always have to look my sexy. That's why I'm wearing these tight, size 42 pens. Be a part of the show. 570-1949. Or shoot them a...
Text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm sorry, our time is up. Buddy, down here in the cup holder, yeah, it's us, your spare change. Now, look, this might seem strange, but frankly, we've had it with just being tossed in here and forgotten about. And we want you to drive to Mickey D's right now and use us on something delicious, like one of those 2 for 350 deals they got going on. Head over to McDonald's for one of two awesome deals. Enjoy two classic Big Mac sandwiches for only $3.50. Or at breakfast, get two sausage McMuffin with egg sandwiches for only $3.50. That's double the delicious for, like, small change. Yeah, because if you don't, we're going to make a whole lot of noise. Right, boys? Most restaurants open late. Many open 24 hours. Limited time offer. Price of single item posted on menu board. Prices and participation may vary. McDonald's $1.49 Filet-O-Fish Fridays are back. A Filet-O-Fish sandwich with tartar sauce, American cheese, and crispy fish filet is just $1.49 every Friday for a limited time at participating McDonald's. Prepare for an adventurous career by earning a professional certificate in marine technology from National University Polytechnic Institute.
Available specializations include advanced dive medicine and underwater inspection technology. Classroom courses and hands-on training are held at our convenient San Diego campus. National University Polytechnic Institute provides assistance with job placement and financial aid is available to those who qualify. Learn more at nupolytech.org. Get your winner on at Mammoth Mountain. Mammoth is 100% open with the best terrain for your ski week adventures. Or for the fun and excitement of the U.S. snowboarding and free skiing Grand Prix. February 29th through March 3rd. Don't just take their word for it. Three-time X-Game gold medalist Kaya Turski. How's the snow at Mammoth? The conditions are always picture perfect in Mammoth. Warm and sunny. See you at Grand Prix. For lift tickets, lodging and more, visit mammothmountain.com or call 800-Mammoth. Meet one of your local GEICO agents. Hello. She's close by. Feel free to call or stop by anytime. Call or pop right in for some small talk. You know, lovely weather. Fancy the game tonight? Could I save 15% or more on my car insurance? 15%? That's not small talk, is it? I'll never like that term. It's a bit offensive to folks like myself. Geico. 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. As a home plate on, my eyesight is my paycheck. Strike one! Strike that thing was chin high! But the price of monthly contact lenses was eating me up. Strike two!
Come on, it bounced to the plate. So to save some money, I'm just using these glasses I found. Cha-ching. Strike three, you're out. He hasn't even pitched a ball yet. There's an easier way to save. To get a free rate quote, go to Geico.com. Then buy online, over the phone, or at your local Geico office. Hey, San Diego, it's Tony for Butoni. You know Butoni, the freshly made Italian pastas and sauces that'll send your salivary glands into overdrive. Well, they want more people to keep the Butoni name on the brain. So I'm asking you to help us cook up a jingle. Ooh, sounds like I got one cooking. It's the delectable, exceptional, gastrointestinal delight of your night. Butoni, Butoni, Butoni, Butoni. Oh, you make me feel so right. Think you can top that magic? Just go to Facebook.com slash Butoni USA and upload your original Cooking Up a Jingle lyrics by March 17th. We'll pick the top five, you vote, and the winner gets 5,000 smackeroonies. Go to Facebook.com slash Butoni USA for full lyric requirements, eligibility, and official rules. Void or prohibited. No purchase necessary. Contest open to legal residents of the 50 U.S. states in D.C. ages 18 up. Interest must be received by 11.59 p.m. EST, March 17th. Voting closes 5 p.m. EST, April 4th. The price of gas was really taking its toll on my wallet. Oh, hey, Shelly.
So, to save some money, I've started taking the bus that sort of goes by my office. Mom, stop talking. You're embarrassing me. Did I mention it's my daughter's school bus? There, I just did. Hey, a penny saved. Stop. Stop it. Penny earned. There's an easier way to save. To get a free rate quote, go to Geico.com. Then buy online, over the phone, or at your local Geico office. Meet one of your local Geico agents. Hi, folks. Actually, we've got a lot in common, you and I. Um, we do. You like to save folks 15% or more on their car insurance? Sure do. I like to save folks 15% or more on their car insurance. It's like we're twins, separated at birth. Okay. Except for the old tail thing. Geico. 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. For auto, home, life, and banking, get to a better state. Find an agent or get a quote at statefarm.com. This report brought to you by Pro Nutrients, a new line of three select supplements from the makers of Centrum. Help make nutrition possible. A little bit of a delay as you travel on Paradise Valley Road, the on-ramp to the 125 South. That's due to defective traffic signals. Just treat that like a four-way stop and get on through.
They haven't fixed that yet. They've been working on that for a while. Looks like the 67 northbound, you've got some backup from Lakeside Avenue to Wintergarden Boulevard. That's in the 40s. And then as you travel over here on to the 8 eastbound Sunset Cliffs Boulevard, those speeds are starting to drop again, 42 miles an hour. This report brought to you by the San Diego County Credit Union. San Diego County Credit Union's proud to introduce SDCCU Mobile Deposit. Super easy. Just check, stamp, deposit. Enroll today at SDCCU. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. How many suits you got? One. And the only reason I don't have more than one is because I never know what's going to happen with my weight. Woods. I'd rather watch a tornado than watch soccer. Yeah. I'd rather watch a fake tornado than watch soccer. That's just me, though. Lauren. I rolled my eyes so hard, I didn't think they were going to come back down. And Jay. I'm bringing the war to your shores. No. Yes. On FM 94.9. Today is lava. Now, when I say that sometime between now and nine, I will weave that into a sentence sometime between now and nine. And when I do, I want you to be caller number nine at 570-1949. You will get a four-pack of tickets to go to the NASCAR Nationwide Series when it comes to Fontana at the Auto Club Speedway. It's Saturday, May 24th. You will win tickets to that, a four-pack.
Just by listening for that word, lava. I'm Mikey, that's Woodsy, that's L-O-B, that's Jay, and screening phones for us is Nicole. If you want to call, you can talk to Nicole. Woodsy, what's going on with Chris Dielman? Well, the Chargers will not confirm, neither will Chris Dielman, but sources very close to Chris Dielman, who is the all-pro left guard for the Chargers, say that his intentions are to retire. If you remember last year, he had a seizure. He had a concussion and then suffered a seizure in October. And, man, it just, you know, it makes sense. Yeah. You know, if it's getting that bad, it's time to. It's just sad because he's such a great player. Yeah. And there's a lot of question marks, you know, on that offensive line. And losing a guy of his caliber is tough. Very tough. I mean, if you think about it, man, Marcus McNeil could be gone. There's your left tackle. Then your left guard retiring. Both all pros. Dude, that's your whole left side. So that.
has to be the way that the Chargers go. Yeah, you would think so. In the draft. But I'm looking at the front page of the UT, and it's saying that they're setting their sights on an outside pass rusher, which is what they drafted last year in Corey Legion. You know, and there's a couple of free agents out there that look pretty good. Cliff Averill's one that they've mentioned. And, you know, they've got to shore up the offensive line, dude. I mean, we've talked about it ad nauseum. When Phillip Rivers has time to throw. He is one of the best quarterbacks in the National Football League. When he doesn't, he's not. Yeah. If you watch the Baltimore game where he shredded that defense, Jared Gaither, who they picked up from the Chiefs, protected him all night, and he was like a surgeon. Yeah. I mean, we've talked about it so much, but I can't imagine they're not going to just try to get as many offensive linemen in camp next year. If you can somehow get the day off. And you are into snow sports of any kind. Julian is absolutely covered in snow right now. They're showing it on television. It is absolutely covered in snow. And so, Jay, is there places close by where you can ski that are close? Oh, Big Bear is only two hours, two and a half hours away. But you're going to need chains everywhere you go. Big time.
I heard they have good pies. Mountain High. They do, dude. I want some Julian pies. Julian apple pie. Do you want to go sledding Mount San Jacinto? Is that how you pronounce it? Mm-hmm. Why did you look at me when you said that? Just because I'm Hispanic doesn't necessarily mean that I know how to spell or pronounce Laguna. Don't both of your parents speak fluent Spanish. That is a true story. It's Halloween. I'll tell you about Everest in just a moment. Catchphrase. Two sides play. Mikey and Woods versus L-O-B and J. Describe a phrase without using any words. Like buffing a poop instead of polishing a turd. Catchphrase. If there is not the normal pep in my voice. Oh, boy. Already making excuses. It's because my gallbladder has been removed. Nice beaver. Wow, Jay, it's always great. If you don't have the sound effect in front of you, just say the sound effect. Oh, my God.
What? Knockers. Talking about you. All right. Let's see. So we got to have people decide which team they would like. This is M1 Lally's mom from El Cajon. Are you there? Yes, I am. And who would you like? Team Fats. Team Fats, me and Woods. Hang on the line. I like you, Lally. M1 Dispatcher from Imperial Beach. You've got Team Fit. And that's L-O-B and J, okay? Yeah, that's a telly doo. There you go. That's right. What's a deli duo? I don't know. I think we're the deli duo. Yeah, you guys are the deli. You guys are the deli. That's true. Like a Reuben and a club. A Reuben stutter. All right, you start. Oh, yeah, you pick the category and everything. Come on. Don't do any bits. I'm ginger here. Who's ginger? I thought you were Mikey. Marianne. Marianne. All right, the category is going to be everything. I have to describe to Woods. L-O-B and Jay have to describe to each other. Pass this hot potato. Here we go. Three words. Okay. First word is your favorite team. The Yankees? Yeah, well. Yankee doodle dandy. No, no, no. It's telling someone that you want them to go back to their house. Oh, I said the word. I just said go. Damn it. I just said go. It was Yankee go home. I've never heard of that. Me either.
Yankee, go home. I've heard it. Oh, yeah, maybe I have. Team 2 gets a point. Never heard of it. All right. Easiest point we'll ever get. Yeah. We're going to go with SciTech. All right. Here we go, SciTech. I always pick that one. Yeah. Here we go. Oh, he builds your page that's on the internet. Web designer. No, it's another. He's not. Webmaster. Yes. Oh, wow. This was a game. It's also a big rock that falls out of the sky. Asteroids. Yep. Asteroid. Yes. If someone has, they take like Ritalin. Yes. Because they can't focus on something. They're dyslexic. No, they're hypertensive. They're like, hey, you pay. Attention. Yeah. Short attention span. No, you got the first word, but it means you're lacking it. Like the budget. You know, right now we're in like a trillion. Short attention span. No. There's an acronym for it, but I can't say it because I feel like it's going to be cheating. HPD. You take medicine for it, you're like... ADD. Yes. Attention Deficit Disorder. Yes. Fake. I couldn't think of it. I couldn't think of it. What a fake. I swear I could not think of it. I swear I could not think about it. God. It's not even close. I don't know what it is. What is it? I was throwing out every garbage thing I could think of in my head. HPV? You've got to hand it over, Mikey. Yeah, you've got to hand it over.
Clown. Now they're leading two to nothing. I would just like to say I played that round fair and square. I played it fair as well. I'm just not smart. Fine. We'll come back. Isolate that clip, yes. Here we go. We're going to do entertainment. All right. Here we go. Oh, Batman. Robin. No, no. It's a new way they talk about the movie. It's the name of the movie. Oh, The Dark Knight? Yes. He played Batman. Heath Ledger. No, the dogs like this. Oh, Jason. Bateman. No. Come on. He was also the machinist. Yes. Freaking, I don't know. If you believe in Jesus, you're a? Christian. Christian Bale. Yeah. Oh, gosh. Fake bit. Okay. No, promise. She was Penny Lane in Almost Famous. Goldie Hawn's daughter. She's very good. The guy from Muse, yes. I hate her. Her name is. It's like a river in New York.
Denial. What is her name? That's the greatest thing ever. Earth's name is the same as Middleton. Kate Hudson. Fake bit. Fake bit. This. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm raging inside. Oh, my gosh. I'm raging. I'm raging. I'm raging, too. They are now leading three to one. Three to nothing. Three to nothing. M1 Dispatcher, they are only one away. They're only one away. I'm not from victory. I swear to you, I am not playing a game here. Hang on, dispatcher. I'm playing a game. I'm one lollies, mom. We are trying for you as hard as we can. Come on, you guys can do this. We can do this. We can do this. Hang on the line. Okay, everything. I swear. I can't remember his name. Can we win one freaking point? Just one. We're going to get it. Here we go. Here we go. All right. It's not the top. It's the bottom. No. Under. A flop. A flop. Flip. A flip. Oh, he said it. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. We're back in the game. They lost a point there. So now it is three to one. It is three to one. We're back in the game because he said a word that was in the clue. A flip.
I'm lit. All right, sports and games. By the way, the Nile is in New York. Yes, the Nile is in New York. I just get it on the river I can think of. Fantastic. Genius. All right, you ready? Yes. Sports and games. Here we go. If I do this, I take a lure, I throw it in the water. Fly fishing. Second word is correct. Bass fishing. The word is correct. If you do this, hey, see you later. Casting. I'm believing. Leaving. Hey, you would write this on a note to your wife. This is where I went. I left. I left. Left fishing. Left fishing. Just like that, but not left. Right fishing. Not come, but. Go. Go fishing. Go fishing. Almost. Go to school. Go fishing. Go fishing. Go fishing. Almost. Come on. Go fishing. It's like that. Add two more letters to. Go fishing. Yes. Today. No. It's two words. Come on. Go fishing. You've done it. You've already done this. Gone fishing. Gone fishing. Gone fishing. I guess it's an old hackneyed phrase. Couldn't you say the first word was wrong? You're saying the first word. Can you say, Mike, first word is not. It's not go, but it's close. Because I kept thinking it was go. Yeah, it's close to go. Isn't it? They're like, is it the past tense?
M1 Lollie's mom, I apologize to you. We suck. We are not. That's a freaking embarrassment. Wow. And every time we lose at this game, which we do often, we blame each other. We just look at each other and we just blame each other for the loss. I'm very sorry, Lollie's mom. You can't give them points. Hang on the line. Hey, they gave a point. They gave one, too. They gave one, too. M1 Dispatcher from IB. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Yeah. Team Fit did it for you. Remember that. You guys are too busy thinking about bellies. That's right. You guys and your Reubens and your roast beef. Ouch. Oh, my belly. That was why, Woods. That's why. My belly. Great. So check this out. If you want to climb Mount Everest and you want to do it safe, which you do, you have to spend a minimum of $35,000. A minimum. Now, that's... To go as part of a seven-person group. If you want to go solo, it's going to cost you about $60,000. You are kidding. That big group of people that died, they actually paid that and still died. That sounds awesome. Yeah. They paid that. They paid that. How do you pay to do something that's really hard? And why do you do it? Is it just so that you can say to people? Because I'd have to say it every five minutes.
Thrill Seeker. The Adventure. It sounds insanely incredible. It sounds awful. I would love to be able to do it. I don't think my wife would let me, but I would love to be able to go. It sounds awful. I mean, it sounds like I read the book In the Thin Air. Yes, I did, too. And it made me sick. I'm smart, too. I wanted nothing to do with that. I read books. I wasn't saying you were. Fine. John Krakauer was the author. Correct. I know what you're trying to do. You're pointing out that you read. I'm not. I'm saying that it sounded like crap. Yeah. That's a crap deal. It does not sound fun. It makes you, like, sick. You get a headache. Exactly. 28,000 feet. Not everybody. That's how high airplanes are. Oh, my gosh. Forget it. No way in the world. Just climbing. Just climbing. Gosh, just to see what you see, though. I mean, the sights. How about a picture, man? Hey, look it on the internet. Yeah, well, I can Google it. It seems pretty cool for the people that do it. Just being honest with myself, nah, I'm not that person. I'm not that person either. I'll do it in a minute. Let's see. Switchfoot's playing a show here in San Diego. And the tickets are going to be available for it tomorrow. And it's going to be on sale from tomorrow through Friday. But you can only get it on this website called livingsocial.com. And it's going to be a little bit different. They're going to do this thing where they do an hour-long Q&A session followed by a 30-minute acoustic set. Sweet. Now, there's two levels of tickets. VIP.
on the floor. That's going to be $75, and the balcony's $50. All seats at both prices are general admission, but the VIP floor people get the post-show meet and greet with a band. Pretty nice, right? That's real cool. Yeah. Acoustic sets are always awesome. Oh, yeah. They're the best. Those, Switchfoot, those guys are just so about doing stuff for their fans. Absolutely. They really are. And for everyone, for that matter. That's a pretty cool thing they're doing. Speaking of pretty cool things, Jimmy Fallon and Brian Williams. Brian Williams, who does the nightly news. Right. Identical Brian Williams. Yes, that's perfect. Brian Williams is willing, even though he is a major newscaster, he is willing to do some pretty funny stuff. Although the Supreme Court paved the way for these super PACs, some Democrats assert the president should stand by his initial opinion that unlimited corporate money could erode the foundation of our democracy. You ain't lying, Brad Brad Willwell. The super PACs are getting super freaky. It's a Super Bowl!
of criticism the president maintains he's got to accept the reality of these super packs if he wants the battle for the white house to be a fair fight i can't believe you came up here talking about super packages bright will i am he's willing that's good i like guys he's will i am uh it's good that people can laugh at themselves and you know he doesn't take himself so seriously that he won't get on and do some stuff i can tell woodsy what did you did you think it was lame Yeah, I thought it was a lame bit, but I think it's cool that he did it. You thought it was lame that Fallon did it? I just think it was a lame bit. I think it was a boardroom idea, and we all know what those are about. Yeah, a boardroom idea means you say it in the boardroom, but when it's executed, you don't like it. Yeah, it sounds incredible, and everyone's all excited. And then when he did it, he's like, oh, no, I have to actually say this stuff. Donald Trump, who most people consider to be a... Jackass. Yes. Had this to say about what Sacha Baron Cohen did on the red carpet when he...
dumped the ashes onto Ryan Seacrest on the red carpet of the Oscars a couple of nights ago. This third-rate character named Sacha Baron Cohen thought he was being cute and funny when he threw ashes at Ryan Seacrest. Now, I know Ryan Seacrest. He's a great guy. Hey, just, I mean, does a guy ever not self-pouch himself? Gosh, dude. Thank you, Captain Obvious. Yeah, I know him. He was visibly upset. it was disgraceful and the security guard that was standing to the right he ought to be fired immediately that guy had nothing he is not capable he allowed this guy to get away with so much believe me if that ever happened to somebody with real security Sasha Baron Cohen would not be in good shape right now. He'd be in a hospital. He would have been punched in the face so many times. He wouldn't have known what happened. Woods is beside himself. L.O.B. is shaking her head like, has this guy lost his mind? Yeah. Number one, who is Sasha Baron Cohen? Number one is what I want to know, Donald. Number two, does it say where he's doing this? Did he hold a press conference? Yeah. This is...
That's a great question, Woodsy. And why do we care what this D-head thinks? That Ryan took a swing at him. And I only wish that the security guard that allowed it all to happen, number one, gets fired. And number two, go to school, learn about being security. You don't know, man. He really loves to fire people. Yeah. It was his own. It was his YouTube video blog. Ah, perfect. His YouTube video blog. What a weirdo. Yeah. He's really, really against what? Sacha Baron Cohen. He's against it hard. He's against it hard. Really against it very hard. He probably went through security and they were like, any weapons or anything? Oh, what do you got? Whatever that weird stuff is? Okay, cool. You're a comedian. That's part of your bit. Exactly. Good luck out there. Did you guys know that the new bit, remember the guy that did the dentist thing with his kid? His kid. I'm not, I'm, what's happening right now? Oh, yeah. Remember that kid? Yeah, he was all doped up. That's the new bit, is if your kid, if you take your kid to the dentist, that's the new bit. Hey, where are we? Where are we? You are at home. No, no, don't touch it. Don't touch it. You had your wisdom teeth out. Yeah, you did. Oh, my God.
You had your wisdom teeth out. Don't touch it. You ready to go in the house? Why, why? Oh, it's going to hurt. Oh, it's hurting my stomach. Gauze! Darling, it's gauze. It's gauze! I said it! I'm sorry. Where are we? We're home, right? So weird. Gauze. Let me tell you again. Gauze! You had your wisdom teeth out. It's called gauze. I did? Yeah? I did? Gauze in your ear? Does it hurt? No. How do you feel? You feel good? A little dizzy? Yeah. What do you want to do now? No. Oh, my God. Gauze. Don't. Just. You ready to go in? It's gauze. It's gauze. Okay. All right. Say bye. See you later. No. It's gauze. What the hell's in her mouth? Gauze. Yeah. Are you sure? It's gauze. That is.
Identical Ella B getting her wisdom teeth taken. Is it? Oh, yeah. I got so, I didn't remember what was being said, but I woke up and the nurses and my mom were all laughing at me. Oh, why? My mom told me I was saying all kinds of weird stuff. How old? 16? Yeah. And I came to, and she said, I thought that I just woke up and sat up and they were laughing. She said I was saying a string of weird things like that. Yeah. But that was the first thing I remember, and then I blacked out again. The next thing I remember, I woke up on a couch in my parents' house, but my mom said when we pulled up to the house, I was like, I'm not going in. I'm not going in. And ask yourself, ask yourself, is there anything worse than going to the dentist and biting your lips because you can't feel them? Right. Feels good, though. Gosh, they didn't give me any drugs. They just took me and they gave me a shot and popped them out. And you got a wisdom teeth? Yeah. Where'd you go? Mexico? Two different places. One was like, it was a dank little dark dentist office. Maybe you go to a dentist. It was. It was a weekend. Maybe don't go to a strip mall. A carpenter. I literally walked in and he's like, oh yeah, you gotta get him out? Okay, he gave me a shot in both of them and he went. I got back in my car and drove home. Did he mention that the guy was a shoe salesman? He wasn't actually a dentist. He was a cobbler. He was like a light bulb. Hang on just a second. I got a really, really cool sound. Oh, no.
Oh, I can smell fluoride. I can smell smoke. My tooth is burning. My tooth is burning. How does that happen? What's that smell? Is that skin? Did you say root canal? Yeah. My mouth is so dry. It's so dry. Awesome. This is kick-ass. I think the corners of my mouth are bleeding. Yeah. I taste blood. I'm going to throw up. How is your hand all in my mouth? Show me taste like river rocks. Are you going to pay in my mouth? If you're getting, you know, your teeth done, doesn't everybody feel like you're being judged? Your mouth is being judged? Absolutely. It's wide open. You can't see what they're looking at. You have no idea. And you just want to eat.
I imagine he's going, I've never seen one this bad. This is absolutely hideous. I don't know how this guy is married. They do the thing where they see how much your gums are like, and they're like four or eight. I'm like, what does it mean? What does that mean? Is that bad or is that good? Is that what? Mr. Woods, do you use smokeless tobacco? Oh, wow. Yes, yes, I do. Yes, I do. Yes, I do. Yes, I do. Oh, okay. When you find out. The difference between what chicks and dudes say when we are asked, what would you do if you had an extra 15 minutes in your day? You would be shocked. Now, we were talking about it before the show started, and we think that women actually are doing a bit. Change your life. A career you'll love. Hands-on training. How many times a day do you hear different schools all saying these same things? At California College San Diego, we say enough with the empty promises. Making a life change and getting into a career you love is entirely up to you. So instead, let's talk about what California College San Diego can do for you. Call us today at 1-800-
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Have so much breakage, especially now. It's really dry in the winter, and I'm so glad I'm using Ovation because it has done me right for over a year now. Thank you, thank you, thank you to the folks over at Ovation. You too can have the gift of beautiful hair. Log on to OvationHair.com and be sure to select FM949 at checkout, and you're going to get a special introductory discount. So for thicker, stronger, longer hair, log on to OvationHair.com, and remember, FM949 at checkout for your special introductory discount. Back to programming in a minute, but first, listen to this. Seems the New York Mint is releasing to the public classic U.S. gold coins. There's a number you can call for free historical information and a free DVD. But first, it says that during the Great Depression, people were clamoring for gold coins because no one wanted to face economic turbulence without the security of gold. The government finally took them out of circulation, and a government meltdown was ordered. That's why most of us have never even seen a classic U.S. gold coin. But recently a stash was discovered in Europe, gleaming U.S. gold coins minted between 1866 and 1933, all uncirculated. It says the New York Mint is releasing them to the public on a first-come, first-served basis when you call, here it is, 1-800-900-9517. Wouldn't that be amazing to hold U.S. history?
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And then on the 805 southbound before Market Street, we've got a car that's stalled in the middle lanes. This report also brought to you by Allstate. Let an Allstate agent make your life easier by bundling your policies. They'll help you do the switching and the paperwork. Find an agent near you at Allstate.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Dying. And Jay. I'm an awesome beer drinker on the course. On FM 94.9. I'm Mikey. That's Woodsy. That's LLB. That's Jay. Screening phones for us is Nicole. Word of the day is lava. When I say that word, I'll weave it into a sentence. And if you're caller nine, I will give you a four-pack of tickets to the NASCAR race when it comes to the Auto Club Speedway up in Fontana. So just be listening for me to say that word. Woodsy has new news on Jerry Sandusky.
Yeah, it's nothing super major, except his attorney has asked the judge for a two-month delay. They want to start the criminal trial in mid-July, saying that they just need more time to prepare. As you know, Jerry Sandusky was the former defensive coordinator for Penn State. He's 68 years old. He faces 52 criminal charges that he sexually abused 10 boys over a 15-year period. So they need some more time to do some interviews and things like that. So they're looking at mid-July for the start of this trial. And L.A. Lakers guard Kobe Bryant suffered a nasal fracture during the All-Star game, was popped in the nose, and she's a broken nose now. So he'll be day-to-day, but I think he'll be fine, be back in the lineup. Seems like the worst kind of deal. Oh, broken nose hurts. So if you had an extra 15 minutes in the day, what would you do? Well, this isn't going to surprise anybody. Guys would have sex. That doesn't surprise anybody. But this survey says that women say if they had an extra 15 minutes in their day, they would sleep or clean. To which I said, sleep I understand. Who wants to clean? Women. Well, if the guy only needs 15 minutes, then we'd probably rather clean. Yeah. Wow.
Yes. Wow. I get what you're saying, L.O.B. I get what you're saying. It's a valid point. I'm picking up what you're putting down. I would probably sleep, to be honest. Sleep is great. Cleaning is a beating. Women like cleaning sometimes. It's got to be done. Why? I don't know. I will look at my wife. I'm like, let's watch a movie. She's like, no, I got to clean. And she likes it sometimes. Sometimes. Sometimes. L.O.B.? I can't have like a... Say I've got to sit down and do a bit, you know, like the parody song I wrote while you were out. I couldn't do that until I cleaned my house because I need, like, a clear mind. I need a clear space to have a clear mind. We can lay around in filth like a pig. You ladies are wired a lot different than us guys. Yeah, thank goodness. It's a big sense of accomplishment. Well, yeah, I mean, when L.O.B. wrote this song, she needed some clear headspace. Wrote this song about me. Yeah, Mike. Market Locks. true that's identical chris cornell yeah loading up on the sour cream he stuffs his belly over that is true as well
Pounding on the table, he wants some cookie. Eating vats of mayonnaise, he keeps on burping. Drinking boats of gravy, now he's choking. That one really hurts. Mike's always hungry. Boats of gravy will get you. Boats of gravy line. Yeah. Mike, you won't. Easy. What? What's your problem with me singing that way? I wanted to ask you yesterday. Pause it. What is your problem? Let's pull the curtain back. Come on now. Let's go. All right. Let's settle in. What's up, dude? Let's go to comedy school, all right? Okay. In the school of comedy, you're not supposed to, like, give it... Woods is giving this like true, you want your tonality and all this. I wanted to sound like Eddie Vedder. You stole the thunder of the funny by doing. We should put it to a vote because I disagree. And I'll tell you why. In one hand, he has a turkey leg and a butter ball in the other hand. He's trying to sound like Eddie Vedder. Yeah. True or false? Yeah. You said.
I've got the Eddie Vedder part. Yes. True. You called it. Absolutely. You said, I call the Eddie Vedder part. Because he knows he can nail it. Because I know I can get it. Jimmy Fallon, when he did Reading Rainbow, did he sound like Jim Morrison? Yes. Okay. Was it funny? It's incredible. Did he fail comedy school? No. There you go. No. Different. Why? Still doing a parody song in Jim Morrison's voice. I'll tell you why. Okay. Because he sounded identical to Jim Morrison. Right. But you have to ask yourself, are you sounding identical? Yes. You believe that you were identical, what's the name? Play it side by side. Now, that's not bad. Nearly identical. As close as I could get. And, you know, in my mind, I went.
I'm going to nail this Vedder part. Well, and if you can, here's the thing. Like, I can't really sing. If you can sing, it's hard to, like, sing badly. Well, the point is to be goofy, is what I'm saying. Yeah, the words speak for themselves. Right, but aren't you detracting from the words? No. If, in fact, what you're doing is trying to sound like Eddie Vedder. You're very serious. I was very serious. I take my job very seriously. How should I have done it? Funny. It was funny. It was funny. Put it to a vote. I would have been goofy. Put it to a vote. They are calling. They are calling right now. 570-1949. The phone lines are starting to blow up. Who's crazy? Me or Mike? Yes. Who's crazy? Mike's always hungry. Wait a minute.
Now, shouldn't he have been doing identical Eddie Vedder when he did that? No, that was Cornell's part. Shouldn't he have been doing identical Cornell? Nobody can do identical Cornell except Cornell. That's what makes it hysterical. I can sing like Eddie Vedder. That's what makes it better. Yeah. My bad. Jay's bad. He's good. Oh, wow. See, you can't hit that note. Nobody. Jay sounds like the seagull from Little Mermaid. Right. That. is one of the most incredible parodies that I've ever heard. Yeah, it's brilliant. And I don't think I took away from it by trying to sound like Eddie Vedder. Well, we'll see. Who's crazy? Am I crazy or is Woods crazy? Because the phone lines are blowing up. M1 Super Hills fan? Is that a Super Bills fan? Sorry. Who's crazy, me or Woods? You are dead on crazy, Mike. I'm sorry, man. I just saw the Jimmy Fallon and Jeremy Lin parody.
Woods is 100% money on that song, man. He does it justice, perfect, and the lyrics, like Woods said, lyrics speak for themselves. I gotcha. M1 Castino, who's crazy, me or Woods? Mike, you're crazy. Woods, he nailed it. I was cracking up when he did it. Oh, I believe that he nailed it, too. Yeah. I believe that he nailed it, too. I don't think that he was identical better, but I think that he nailed it. Right when the Wiz came out, I was cracking up in my car. All right. I think the words are fantastic. They are. There's no question. And the performance was good, too. M1 Surf Daddy, who's crazy, me or Woods? You know, Mike, I got to go with you, bud. That's gold right there, Woodsy. Thanks, buddy. All right, you're selling me now. Why do you need them to sell you? M1 Lindsey, who's crazy, me or Woods? I love you, Mike, but he was hilarious. And even him being serious kind of made it more funny. Yeah. That actually, that, okay, I can go with that. Him taking it so serious is kind of funny. I wanted to sound good. That's what is ridiculous to me. And that bothers you. Well, it's ridiculous. Well, I wanted to sound good. It's ridiculous. The fact that he sounded good. You should have wanted to sound funny. But when he sounded good singing chocolate pudding. It's like.
The paradox between sounding good and then saying those ridiculous words, I think. You sold me on it. Thank you. I mean, except your humble apologies. It's a landslide. It's a landslide. I think it's neither one of you are crazy. I think you just have a difference of opinion. Yeah, I mean, I think we have different, what is funny to you sometimes, like you like, this is what I do, I sit on you. Me, that makes me want to hang myself with wax dental floss. That is ridiculous. That is an extreme thing to say. What, me? Yeah. Well, especially when a song is brilliant. It's not brilliant. If you don't think this is brilliant, who are you? This is what I do. I sit on you. Sit on you. Sit on you. This is what I do. I sit on you. Right on your lap. This is what I do. I sit on you. Sit on you. You're trying not to laugh. I'm not laughing. I'm trying not to laugh. I'm furious is what I am. This song makes me angry. Sit on you. Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit on you. But his voice sounds good. Yeah. It's well produced. Yeah. But he thinks it's like... He loves it so much. He's dancing. He's dancing. He's got his little arms up. T-Rexing real good. Very, very...
Slow hand movement. Yes. Yes, it was very slow. So we just come from different schools of comedy. Different comedic schools, but it's part of our... Part of our dynamic. Yes. We don't always agree on every movie or song or comedy bit, but we have a good, oh, we have a good chemistry. What I don't understand... Okay, maybe I want some of those. Yeah, we're going to tell you why. We're going to tell you why this morning on the television news and on our radio program. We have some pancakes in just a second. It's pretty cool. It means a lot to me. Oh, gosh. And we're going to tell you all about it. I've never understood Woods on this. How do you not like this? Coughing. Makes me go in my coffin. He's trying, dude. It makes me go in my coffin. This guy's trying. Pause it. Wait. Wait. See? You're trying not to laugh. I'm not. Yes, you are. No, I'm not. Because I have an idea. I want to ask you something. I want to ask you something. Pause it. I love it. That is infuriating. Beautiful. Genius. Infuriating. I love it. What's the matter, Wood? All right.
So let's say it's a Sunday afternoon and you're sitting around and you get an email from your old pal, Woodsy, and it says, hey, dude, I just came up with this. I think you're really going to like it. You would call the cops to my front door and be like, my friend Woods is using drugs. You are 100% correct. Yeah, I know. You're 100% right. I know. You know why? Why? It doesn't fit you. Right. It doesn't make sense. You'd think I was insane. It doesn't make sense coming from you. You would think I was insane. We're going to slow things down, Woods. Because this is a song that is going out from me to you, and this is about comedy. Funny. This is funny. It's a true story. The endless life you provide. Yes. Endless life. And then there's this great piece of work. This is maybe the greatest piece of work and art that I've ever heard. This is art. It's a song about a man with petite feet. That's funny.
Woods, I have a question for you. Yes, fire away. I would like to know what the difference is between what you just heard right now, the song Petite Feet. I would like to ask you the difference between Petite Feet and say Beach Blast. Beach Blast. A summer that will never forget. Malibu. There will be so much to do. We just arrived at the show. We'll surf the biggest waves and more this weekend forecast. It will be a beach blast. It will be a beach blast. Woods doesn't like that. Well, one is funny. The other one is ridiculous. Men with petite feet are hysterical. And it actually has a point. That clown talking about his beach blast.
It's a dip ass. Straight up. It's freaking genius. No way. It's not. Jared, come over to the microphone. Let's talk to Jared, who is here from Children's Hospital. And John? Yeah. Hi, John. Hi. How are you, John? Good to meet you. I work for IHOP Corporation. Nice. Right up to the microphone. I work for IHOP Corporation, and I actually work with the franchise organizations around Southern California and work directly with them to ensure that we're delivering a great experience out there across the brand. Now, I've seen you guys on television this morning, and you're hitting the media. Tell everybody what you're doing today. Right. Well, I'll tell you, right now, you can go into IHOP today from 7 a.m. till 10 p.m. tonight, and you'll get a free short stack for everyone across the country. And any donations that we raise goes to the Children's Miracle Network. Here comes all money raised here in San Diego, all the IHOPs here in San Diego. We have 23 of them.
All of that comes back to Rady Children's Hospital right here in the United States, right here in town. Oh, it's fantastic. So, the times again with this. The times are 7 a.m. So it already started. It started 23 minutes ago. You got it. And it goes till 10 p.m. tonight. Every IHOP in the country, we're expected to raise about... 2.7, almost $3 million in one day. That is incredible. From all the great folks across the country. And again, it stays here in the community. Wow. That's so awesome. So people come in and make that little donation, put the hot air balloon up on the wall. Yeah, and actually today we actually have a box right up front in all restaurants. And you can come on in. And again, if you can, have your free short stack. And if you'd like to make a donation, it'll be right there. And we'll make sure it happens. Please do, man. People know that. Rady Children's Hospital is really super dear to me and to a lot of our listeners. And Jared is in the studio with us. You're here with us on Mikey-thon. Love it. Every year. Work for Rady. And you've seen some really amazing things happen there. And been a part of some really amazing stuff with the kids. So thanks for bringing in some short stacks for us today.
Thanks. I hope you enjoy them. I hope everyone on San Diego takes some time to stop by and get some free pancakes. Please do. Yeah, please do. Please do. And help us raise some dough and have that go to Rady Children's Hospital. And that's really cool. How's everything at the ADI, the Autism Discovery Institute? It's going well, Mikey. You know, we just finished a brand new playground. So the kids are out there. There's even a trampoline. Hey, by the way, as he's saying that, I want people to know. I want M1s to know. M1s, you're a big part of that. No question. When he's saying that they got trampolines out there, M1 Nation is a big part of that being there. Yep. They've raised a lot of money. A lot of money. A lot of money. $50,000 last year when we did it. And this year we hope to raise even more. Yeah. So, oh, it's so awesome. Hey, dude, thank you for coming in. Thanks, Mike. We appreciate it. Delicious. Who do you think... Like, what profession do you think it is that gets the most rest? I'll tell you this. You're not it. We'll tell you when we come back. Hey, listen. AIS recently announced that they got the results of their latest savings survey.
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Head over to McDonald's for one of two awesome deals. Enjoy two classic Big Mac sandwiches for only $3.50. Or at breakfast, get two sausage McMuffin with egg sandwiches for only $3.50. That's double the delicious for, like, small change. Yeah, because if you don't, we're going to make a whole lot of noise. Right, boys? Most restaurants open late. Many open 24 hours. Limited time offer. Price of single item posted on menu board. Prices and participation may vary. McDonald's $1.49 Filet-O-Fish Fridays are back. A Filet-O-Fish sandwich with tartar sauce, American cheese, and crispy fish filet is just $1.49 every Friday for a limited time at participating McDonald's. At Acura, we believe that a luxury automobile should be more than a status symbol. It should be an experience tailored specifically to you. And everything about the Acura TSX lineup of vehicles was designed to make it that way. Including an automatic climate control system that lets you and your passenger create your own microclimates. And an innovative five-speed automatic transmission that can be switched to manual mode using steering wheel mounted paddle shifters. And here's something else we think you'll enjoy. Exceptional offers on select Acura models. Including 0.9% APR financing on the 2012 TSX sedan.
V6 sedan, and sport wagon for well-qualified buyers. To learn more, visit Acura.com or stop by your local dealer for a test drive. Acura Advance. Offer ends February 29, 2012. See dealer for details. San Diego County, stop in and test drive the quick and smart 2012 TSX today. Find your Acura dealer at sdacuradealers.com. Truly Nolan Pest Control, protecting you from rodents, insects, and creepy exterminators. For complimentary inspection, call 1-800-GO-TRULY or visit trulynolan.com. This report is brought to you by IHOP. Celebrate IHOP's National Pancake Day today from 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. You can enjoy a free short stack of IHOP pancakes when you contribute to Children's Miracle Network Hospitals. Happens today only. One free short stack per guest. See your store for details. Well, we've got a lot of slowing going on. It's unusual this early in the morning. The 805 northbound from Sweetwater Road to Bonita Road, about 21 miles an hour. Also, lots of slowing here on the 5 northbound from 7th Street all the way down to East Street. At least it looks like it's about between 13 and 26 miles an hour. And then Broadway Street, that on-ramp to the 54 East. There's an accident, but no injuries. This report brought to you also by the San Diego County Credit Union. San Diego County Credit Union is proud to introduce everyone.
SDCCU Mobile Deposit. Super easy. Just check, snap, and deposit. Enroll today at SDCCU.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. This is Bird, Bird Surf Shed with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Tuesday morning being brought to you by Island's Restaurants. Surf-wise today, looking pretty messy out there. That wind and groundswell mix out of the west-northwest and touch of southwest, all hammered and blown out by that storm front that is slowly passing through our area. Sizes up, waist chest, shoulder high waves everywhere, overhead plus waist standout spots. But the combination of continued west-southwesterly winds and scattered rain showers, along with dirty waters, are making it a lay day, to be sure. Better things hopefully will follow in the next day or so. But right now, looking pretty poor and trashy. For up-to-the-minute surf reports forecast, go to surfline.com. And for surf for repair, restoration needs, go see Joe Roper. The authentic surf report can only be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. Grown-up stuff scares me. I hear words that really freak me out because I'm like...
Gosh, that sounds like a word my dad would use. Woods. I have like a self-conscious 16-year-old sophomore that's real chubby. Lauren. I'm starting to feel guilty about it, though, because I'm wondering if I've disrupted the ecosystem at the lake. And Jay. Just because I like to be outdoors, you guys like to make fun of me. On FM 94.9. So there is updates going on with what happened. In the shooting incident in Ohio, the second kid has died, which is really, really sad, man. It's so sad. Two kids dead yesterday with a shooting in Ohio. And it's just a sad situation, man. So before we went to break, I said there are a particular type of workers that get the most rest. And who do you think it is?
Who do you think? Radio morning show hosts, right? And sports guys. Yep. And assistant producers and executive producers. Not true. How could that not be true? Are you kidding me? I have more time on my hands than I ever have in my life. We wake up at an ungodly hour. Right. Truth of the matter is that the CDC says that it's lumberjacks. Lumberjacks. Get the most rest of any profession that there is second only to hairstylists and sales reps. Really? Yes. I got the most sleep as a sales rep. Yeah, as a sales rep, you're very well rested. But it says you're well rested. It doesn't necessarily mean sleep. I am well rested. I mean, I'm as rested as a human can be. I'm the opposite. I'm the opposite. I never have enough sleep. All right. Well, let me be specific with sleep, and I'll tell you who gets the least amount. Health aid workers, lawyers. Yeah. These guys pull some long days. And cops. Yep. So do they. They get the least amount of sleep. We have a cop on our baseball team, and he said he worked 12 hours the day before, slept for four hours, came and played ball.
and then was going to work another 12. Have you watched that show about the cops in Alaska that I told you about? No. You have not watched it? It's so good. I don't watch about 90% of the stuff you tell me to watch. Did you watch Mounted in Alaska? No. I did not. Is that a porn? Oh, wow. No, Jay. It is not a porn. It sounded like one. There has to be a girl's name in front of it. Contrary to popular belief, I don't view pornography. So I wouldn't be telling Woods about Mounted in Alaska, the porno flick. Ten years ago, you would have. It's one of Sarah Palin's films from like 20 years ago. Mounted in Alaska. I didn't know. I have not watched that show. I would, though. Yeah. I have not. When I tell you what it's about, you'll like it. Okay. Taxidermy. It would have been more interesting if you said taxes. Yes, I think so. Aren't you at all interested in how they do that? No.
No. I saw Psycho, and it scared the crap out of me, dude. If somebody takes down an elk, don't you want to know how they make that elk look exactly like the elk that you took down? No. Not at all. Weird. If you take down a moose, you don't want to see how they recreate that moose. I don't want to shoot or have a stuffed moose in my house. You eat it. You don't shoot. You'd never. kill anything you don't eat. So you gotta eat the moose. You have to eat it. You gotta eat the moose. I still, I couldn't have it as a trophy. That's not your boy. I'm not a big, I'm not, that's not me. I can't do that. M1 Alisa from PB, are you there? Hi guys, how are you? Good. So I heard you guys talking about Mounted in Alaska and I had to tell you about this guy I'm dating and okay, so we've been together for a couple months and he's, I mean he's He's the perfect guy. He's the perfect 10. He's got a job, which is not a bad thing, and he's really handsome. He's got a great family, and he's funny. We've been dating for a couple months, and I've spent the night at his house a few times, and he's got this huge, creepy, stuffed fish on the wall. It just freaks me out. I wake up, and it's staring at me.
intimate and it's staring at me. The fish is not staring at you. It's dead. It absolutely is staring at you. It has eyes. The eyes move with whichever way you go. The eyes are marbles, but it does have eyes. I hate it. I want him to take it down and he won't. Did he catch this fish himself? Well, of course he did. Guaranteed. Yeah, he did. We're both active. We surf and we hike. He's into fishing and I'm not. It's one thing we don't agree on. I mean, it's cool. Are you against the killing of innocent fish? No. I mean, I don't want to say anything to kill fish, but if you kill it, eat it, don't just, you know, stick it on the wall. I will say mounted fish guy is kind of. That is weird. It's extreme. I think it's extreme. You're going out there. You're really, you really, you like fishing hard. You love it hard. Yeah. You like it real, you know, that fishing to you. It's very, very important. Oh, yeah. If you go so far as to stuff and mount a fish, I think, you know, and I know there's a lot of people to do. I'm from Texas, dude. They do that all the time. But I never got it. I never understood it. Alicia, have you discussed the matter with this gentleman? Yeah, I mean, it's, you know, his father did this kind of stuff. His grandfather did this kind of stuff. So I can't really tell him not to, you know, carry on the family tradition. It's just like if we're going to move forward.
I don't want my kids stuffing a fish and hanging them in the room, you know? How big is the fish? It's huge. It's like, let's get this big. That's why he mounted it, by the way. I thought that the whole point of catching fish was either catch and release if you have to, but eat it. Eat it. Because you're usually catching something that's going to be delicious. Not unless it's a prized, humongoid fish. Fishermen are liars and they lie about the size of the fish. A hundred percent. A hundred percent. If you stuff it and you're like. One hundred percent of the time. It's on my wall. They're like. You can't lie about that. Yeah. I mean, the biggest fish I ever caught was a ten pound catfish. Yeah, me too. Was it ten pounds? No, it was probably four pounds. It was four. But I say it was ten. Now, if I had it stuffed, people would know. Now, listen. I caught a foot-long trout. There's no doubt. Actually, six? Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so the source of pride is like you had the strength to pull it in? Or what? You picked the right lure, L.O.A. I don't know. I'm joking. You knew how to do it. He's not luring me with the fish. Alicia, when you started dating this guy, would you have ever taken him for a fish stuffer? No. He's a good dude. Normal dude. This whole house is decked out in just fish stuff? Yeah. It's like going into...
The Bates Motel. Disgusting. When you get married, you can make him move it to the garage. Yes. That's the way it works. Right. He's going to want some fish themed wedding. It ain't happening. Yeah. Fish cake. Yeah. Fish cake. Yeah. Hey, thanks for the call. Easy long, John Silver. There's certain things that I think maybe you shouldn't mount it. Yeah. I'm not a big mount. I don't really do. Like if I see a deer head, I'm like, oh, cool. Ten point. Oh, I don't care. Not me. When I see it, I think it's the coolest thing. You do? I think it's the creepiest thing. I do, too. It's good at a honey lodge, but not at your home. Last time, listen, a friend of ours in Arizona, we went to visit a couple of friends over the summertime. This guy's got no less than six bucks in his garage. He's got a mounted bobcat. It's some of the coolest stuff I've ever seen. Our neighbor growing up. He would go on African safaris. He had lions. He had tigers. He had the craziest stuff. And I would walk in there. Mean, mean, mean. Yeah, and I'm like, oh, dude, you're shooting those things. M1 Diet Cokehead from Santee. Hi. Hi, guys. How are you? Saboosh and yourself. Pretty good. You know, after the surgery, not so bad. Good, yay. So what's the deal? Your dad used to mount stuff? Oh, my God, dude. Okay, my dad was born in Allentown, Pennsylvania.
They would hunt and fish and all that stuff. And my whole life growing up in his office, he had stuffed deer heads. He had big, loose antlers he used as a hat rack. All in. Yeah, he had a snow owl. I'm all in. I'm all in. It was so creepy. Yeah, it's creepy. Matthew, when he was little, little, he used to call it the zoo. Yeah. I'd go over to my dad's house and I'd be like, hey, where's grandma and grandpa? And you'd say, oh, they're in the zoo. Well, listen, one person's creepy is another person's fascinating and wondrous. That's true. I mean, there's... He shot... I have signed baseballs in my office. Wait, what did you say, Doc? Okay. I'd say he shot every single one of them. Yeah. Yeah. You don't put them in there if you don't kill them. You got it. Yeah. You can't really have them if you didn't. You don't have to say kill them. I mean. Well, you don't. You did. You hunted them now. You hunted them and you killed them. You shot them with a high powered rifle. You were hiding in a blind. Yeah. But the deal is you hunted them. I mean, you make it sound so terrible when you say. Well, you didn't tackle them and then maul them with your claws. Right. You didn't choke them out and give them a sleeper. Yeah. You shot them with a high powered rifle. Well, you hunted them. Probably from far away. Right. And they were just.
Drinking out of a brook. Yeah. And the next thing you know. His prized possession was a marlin that he caught when he was 16 and had it mounted over his desk. And I got to say, when my mom, my dad passed away in 2001 and a couple of years later, my mom sold the house and all that stuff went into storage. I'm like, you're not going to put it in your new house. I would take some of it. I mean, I think it's cool looking. It's murder. It is not murder. Why do you love murder? It's not murder. It's hunting, for crying out loud. Why are you into murder? Thank you, Diet Cokehead. You can't hunt humans. What do they call it if you hunt a human? You're a serial killer. What do you call it if you hunt an animal? Hunting. That's not fair. It's an elk. It's a different story. Elks have souls. That's right. How do you know? I don't. Let's see. This is, you can put them on hold. Go ahead. Put them on hold, Nicole. You can put them on hold. She can't hear me in there. And this talkback's broke, too. I got two talkbacks that are broke. It's M1 Nurse Noble. Hi, are you there? Go ahead. I thought this was pretty normal growing up, but my dad's always been like an avid hunter. Like, he makes his own bows and arrows.
He makes his own what? Bows and arrows. Bows and arrows, yeah. And we had a freezer in our garage that was designated for creatures. Wow. Rattlesnakes, skunks. Now. Deer. Do you mean the meat or like the actual animal? Well, both. Because, I mean, like, he would hunt elk, quarter it, put the meat. Murder it. Quarter it. Oh, yeah. Quarter it. And then, but, like, one time he caught a rattlesnake. I don't know how. But he put it in a pillowcase and put it in the freezer. Oh, my God. So it, like, boiled up in the pillowcase. So when it was frozen, you could, like, shake it like a rattlesnake. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. What about the skunk? You can't, like, eat that. Yeah, what did he do? You can stuff it. What did he do with the skunk? Well, what he did with it is he skinned it and, like, tanned its hide. Wow. Yeah.
Wow. Was your dad's name Ted Bundy? No. Davey Crockett. Gosh, darn it. Hey, I got a question. Did you ever try any of said meat? Yeah, all the time. Like, venison is delicious. Oh, yeah. I've eaten lion. Mike? You're lion. My brother, Mark, my brother, Mark, had a friend that brought back lion from Africa. You're a monster. It was disgusting. Yeah. It was disgusting. That's why they don't have any natural predators. Gosh darn it, Mike. It's the gamiest piece of meat I've ever put in my mouth. We had a deep freeze as well. I killed this Mufon sheep. It's the one with the big horns. You can't make up names of sheep. You can't make up name Mufon. And so we were going to have it stuffed. So we had it in our deep freeze with all the other meat. And our deep freeze went out. Came back from a vacation and my dad pulls out the... Because we were waiting for the right time to get it stuffed, I guess. I don't know. Oh, my gosh. And it was the hideous, most gross thing ever. All right. Stop. Hey, listen. I want to know, do you take that... You know how sometimes you're going to have spaghetti that night? You take the hamburger meat out of the freezer? Yeah. You let it thaw? Yep. Hey, hon, can you take out some... Take some snake. Some sheep. Some sheep. Take out some mountain sheep. Oh, God.
Let's thaw out some mountain shoes. Disgusting. Can't believe you've eaten a lion. Yeah. You're so mean. M1 Tessa from Del Mar. Hi, yes. My dad has a taxidermy boarhead, a wild boarhead. It's probably a javelina, but, you know, boarhead, where did he catch it? I think it was down in Oklahoma. Did he shoot it with a bow and arrow? No. Well, yeah, I think so. Yeah. Disgusting. Usually those are bow and arrow deals. Listen, if you grow up with it, if you grow up around it, I grew up around hunting, so to me it's normal. Oh, well, yeah, it's normal. He wanted to put it in our house, though, and we refused. Yeah, you don't want a boar head in your house. No. So where did you keep it then? In, like, a shed? No, it's in his office. His man cave? Yeah, it's in your man cave. Yep. All right, I have an email that I want to take your temperature on.
Tell me what you think about this. Mikey, I want to know if I have anything to be upset about. I'm dating a guy that we will call Jeff. And I just found out that every girl that he's ever dated is Asian. And I'm Asian. It makes me feel like it's not about me. It's about my race. What do you guys think? M1 Sparkle. Guy likes what he likes. It's the flavor he likes. If he likes the flavor, then he likes the flavor. If a girl liked me because, well, she does. Everybody that likes somebody likes somebody for a reason. You know, if you're physically attracted to somebody, you're physically attracted for a reason. Right. Guy likes Asians. Guy likes Asian girls. I don't know. If you were a girl and some guy started dating you and he said, you know, he reveals to you, I'll only date Irish girls.
And you're Irish. I would think that was weird. You would think it was weird? Would you be at all offended or put off? A little bit. I would be like, why? I mean, I guess. So would you say to him, so in other words, if my last name were Hernandez, we wouldn't be dating him? Yeah, that would be a little weird for me. What if it was just blonde? Yeah, what if it was blonde hair, blue eyes? Yeah, then I would be fine with that. That's okay. The Irish seem so specific, so I guess. I don't know. Asians more specific than just having dark hair. I've known dudes that were exclusively dated Asian girls. Yeah. And they were serial Asian daters. Yeah. A lot of people only went within like a certain race or something like that. Yep. I have never asked my wife if she's dated another Mexican. Really? I've never asked. In fact, I don't ask about any of that. I don't ask. Do you ask? Yeah, I know about the past. You know all about them? Yeah. I do not. I know, like, the two serious boyfriends I've had. Yeah. Neither one of them had ever dated a blonde before. Well, L.O.B.'s blonde with blue eyes. Right. Your boyfriend, your... Fiance? Fiance, Matt Commerce. Uh-huh. Is he a serial blonder? No. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Him and the other guy that I was really serious with, neither one of them have ever dated blondes before me. Wow. Well, now the first guy's married to a blonde with blue eyes, so... Yeah, there you go. Maybe I turned him around. Yeah.
Turned him out. Yeah. I'm sure that's a fact. Yeah. 5701949. What do you think about that? Is it wrong that this girl's Asian? She starts dating this guy and finds out all he dates is Asians. Is there anything wrong with that? I don't think there's anything wrong with it at all. Do any of us really, unless we're set up. Or I guess maybe online. But even then you see people's pictures. Like, do you ever really just approach someone that you're not attracted to? If that's what he's attracted to. If that's what you're attracted to, that's what you're attracted to. Absolutely. There's nothing bad about it. There's nothing racist about it. It's pretty unusual that you don't start up a relationship because you're attracted to somebody. Physically. Wait a minute. That you don't. I was confused. Wait a minute. Isn't racism, or not racism. Segregation. How would you define the word segregation, Woodsy? The separation of people because of the color of their skin. Maybe it's segregation. No. It's not segregation. That would mean that she has her own water fountain. Right. And her own schools. Yeah. The action or state of setting someone or something apart from other people or things or being set apart.
It is by definition segregation, you guys. She's not being set apart, though. She's not being set apart. Isn't she? No. She's being set apart from white girls. No, he's white. Right, but he is segregating. He could be black. You don't know. He is, in fact, segregating. No. No. He's being specific and choosing something specific. Yeah. He is taking the action or state of setting someone or something apart. from other people or things or being set apart. He's not taking her apart from anything. He's picking her out of a group. If you took her and said, hey, you can't be... He did. He says, listen, white girls? Uh-uh. He says, Mexican girls? Uh-uh. If he's white... He's segregating. If Jeff is white, he's being racist against white women. No, maybe prejudice. He's prejudiced. Oh my gosh, is he prejudiced? He's a monster. No, no, no. I'm just saying. No, because that means that you're like, I don't like white girls because they're a pain in the butt or whatever. If he's just physically attracted to someone, we can rarely help that. Yeah. M1 Poston from San Diego. Are you there? Yeah, I'm here. Go ahead. So my buddy only dates Asian girls, just like this so-called Jeff.
He only dates Asian women because I think the reason he does it is because nine times out of ten, they're really skinny, they're really normally really fit, and almost always financially stable. I don't know if it's... I think it's more for the look because, I mean... Probably the look. He likes the look. They're financially... stable. That's a weird one. That is a weird one. Well, most of them either come from a wealthy family or know what they're going to do. Either they're going to be a doctor. I'd say that's a generalist. Oh, yeah. I don't know. Well, the ones that he knows. Maybe. By the way. It's more like the look because they're fit, they're skinny, and most of the time they are pretty good looking. Hey, he's right. Yeah. I can't speak to their career aspirations or bank account. It depends on what area of Asia you're talking about, too. You know what I mean? No. Not every Asian is little and fit. Aren't they? American Asians. Not every American Asian. Americans. No, that's true. Listen, I read you the definition of segregation.
I don't think he's segregating. He's not segregating. He's not keeping her away from anything. It would mean that she's only allowed to, like, fraternize with other Asians or just him. Right. Our phone lines freaking on fire right now. I know. They are on fire. M1 Liz from Chula Vista. Yeah, hi. Hi, is it a problem? No, I don't think it's a problem. It's like I said, it's just like somebody saying it's the only date within their own race. What if somebody does? What's wrong with that? Is there anything wrong with a Mexican guy? Nothing is wrong with that. It's the morals that they have. Some people grow up that way and some people don't grow up that way. But there's a lot of people that are black or Mexican and won't even date their own race. They'll only date a white guy or a Chinese guy. I think it's racist. No, I think it is. Because you like a flavor. What's wrong with liking a flavor? Okay, my mind just got blown. If I said, I'll only date a white girl. That makes me kind of a racist. I'm a racist. Yeah, you're a racist. That's racist. That's different. But sometimes. How's that different? That's what I'm asking. I know, it's different. Sometimes there's a biological, like, pull to somebody, and you don't even know why. Yeah. You know, you're like, I know that. But if it's always white chicks. I would mate. Maybe you're a racist. Yeah, or if you've. I would mate. Yeah. What do you mean? Pair up. That is the reason that we are all fundamentally attracted to each other. It's chemical. Because you think in your head, like.
The goal of a man is to keep his offspring going. Right. Keep his seed going. So he's like, that woman would pair up with me and give me a healthier child. You know, I believe that it may be a subconscious thing. We're not actively thinking about it. I don't think we're actively at all thinking about it. But it's how we work chemically. Yeah. You know? So if a black guy says, I'll only date white women. Is he being racist towards black women? You just blew my mind. He is. He's being a little bit racist and or prejudiced towards his own race. I think you just blew my mind. And black women, the black women that I've known, they get mad sometimes when they date a white girl. So, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know that there are black women that will get angry if a black dude dates a white girl. Because it's like, what are you, we're not good enough for you. Yeah, and it's like, hey, I just, I like her. I like, like you said, I like the flavor. 570-1949. That is a hot potato. They're all delicious.
Yeah. This is The Mikey Show. I like it. I like it. Be a part of the show. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. You're a nerd. More coming up in just a couple. FM949. On average, 1 in 30 homes get hit by termites. Get to them before they get to you with the Terminex Ultimate Protection Guarantee. Call 1-800-Terminex for your no-obligation inspection. Hey, gang, it's old pal Woodsy. Very excited about this Thursday happy hour at Dave and Buster's. If you haven't been yet, it's a lot of fun. We eat, we hang out, we play video games. I shot probably 15 games of hoops. Last week, I got just called to the carpet by Jay's future son-in-law, Nick. That kid can shoot. So I would say come out and challenge him. Challenge your old pal, Woodsy, to some hoops. We play video games, man. We have fun. We watch basketball. It's a good time. They got half-price selected appetizer specials. They got drink specials. Buy a power card, and you can have a late-night happy hour with unlimited video play with purchase of a power card Sunday through Thursday, 10 p.m. to close. Now, I'm going to be there this Thursday.
From 5 to 7. It's at 2931 Camino del Rio North. I've got tons of stuff to give away. CDs, t-shirts, concert tickets, ski lift tickets. I've got concert tickets. I have so much to do and so much to give away out there. So come and hang out with me. 2931 Camino del Rio North. Right off the 8. It's Dave and Buster's Eat, Drink, Play. This is Toyota Today. Legendary quality. Unsurpassed reliability. And superior value. Now get zero APR on a new 2011 Prius with its 50 MPG. Get zero APR on a luxurious Avalon, versatile Highlander, or sporty RAV4. There's even zero APR on a tough 2012 Tundra or a stylish 2012 Corolla. So see your San Diego County Toyota dealer and save thousands with 0% financing on many of Toyota's best-selling models. Limited term financing through Toyota Financial Services to qualify Tier 1 plus through Tier 3 credit customers only. 2012 EPA estimated mileage. Actual mileage will vary. Vehicles must be purchased from new car dealer stock by midnight March 5th. Offer excludes Prius V and Highlander Hybrid.
For more than a century, Azusa Pacific University has provided excellence in Christian higher education. With five enrollment periods, it's always the right time to start. Relevant Christian degrees since 1899. Go to apu.edu, keyword San Diego. Today, my journey to help save people money on car insurance brings me to the sunny state of California, which has over 840 miles of sandy beaches. So I've been brushing up on my surfing lingo in preparation. Wasabi, surfer bras and salty sisters. If you're jonesing to save sick money on car insurance, switching to Geico could be hyper-fierce, nah nah. Slater, dudes. I think I've got it. To get a free rate quote, go to Geico.com. Then buy online, over the phone, or at your local Geico office. Geico. 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. My wireless internet bill was really adding up. So to save some money, I just use my neighbor's unpassword-protected Wi-Fi for free. It's unpassword-protected because the signal doesn't go outside of the house. Now get off my couch. Not to mention, I recharge my laptop for free. Mm-hmm. Not free. And while I wait for all my downloads, they really need more bandwidth. I just grab a soda. Not much of a diet fan, but beggars can't be choosers.
My robotic assistant, Al, and I have tested out the new Scion IQ. Scion IQ is the world's smallest four-seater. Scion IQ has 11 airbags. Scion IQ is better than Al. Get to your local Scion dealer and check out the new IQ starting at $15,995. Scion, what moves you? Size claim certified by AMCI testing. Call 1-866-240-6684 for claim details. MSRP includes delivery, processing, and handling fee. Excludes taxes, title, license, and optional equipment. Dealer price will vary. Is your hair dry, brittle, and breaking off by the handfuls? Have you fried and damaged your hair from harsh chemicals and heat styling treatments? Are you covering up the holes in your hair where the extensions used to be? Has your hair just stopped growing and won't get any longer? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then log on to OvationHair.com to learn what hundreds of thousands of Ovation Cell Therapy customers have experienced.
How Ovation Cell Therapy can help restore your natural beauty and shine and help your hair grow thicker, stronger, longer, and faster. Up to twice as fast. Ovation is guaranteed safe and effective on all hair types, even for chemotherapy hair loss recovery. So you can use Ovation with confidence or get a full refund. For thicker, stronger, and longer hair, log on to OvationHair.com and enter FM 94.9 at checkout for a special introductory discount. That's Ovation Hair. And remember to enter FM 94.9 at checkout for your special discount. This report, it's brought to you by 5-Hour Energy. You know that 2.30 feeling. You hit the wall, but you've got to get stuff done. That's the time for 5-Hour Energy. 5-Hour Energy when you've got to get stuff done. Well, it looks like we have a slow morning. Whoa, this 8. Stay away from the 8. The 8 is very slow. The 8 westbound. The 15 south all the way.
all the way almost into El Cajon to Severn Drive. It's about 10 miles an hour, that whole stretch in there. Also, you've got a pedestrian walking around on the 5 northbound past B Street. Watch out for them. You've got an accident on the 805 southbound of the 54 East Connector. Lots of slowing up here, too. on the 8 westbound from Greenfield Drive to Lake Jennings Park Road. It's about 25 miles an hour. This report brought to you by ProNutrients. New ProNutrients are three select supplements from the makers of Centrum. Help make nutrition possible. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. The Mikey Show. That'll work. With Mikey. I wear like a 44 small. Woods. I'm so lonely. Lauren. I'm very clumsy. And Jay. I'm wearing Dockers right now. Oh my God. On FM 94.9. Is it wrong if you date within your race? Is it wrong if you're only attracted to one particular race? People are blowing up our phone lines right now. 5701-1949.
Woodsy has news on offensive Charger lineman Chris Dielman. Yes, sir. All-pro left guard Chris Dielman more than likely will retire. The Chargers will not confirm, nor will Dielman. But sources close to the team and close to Chris Dielman say he will retire. It's probably time. He had a concussion last year and a seizure. So probably time for him to walk away for quality of life. Yeah, you don't want him to get messed up the rest of his life. Exactly. M1 Charles from La Mesa. Are you there? Yeah, I'm here. What do you think about this guy that only dates Asian chicks? Well, to me, it's kind of a big way of thinking to me because then you'd want to ask why. See, I wonder. Why is it? But you can't explain what you're attracted to. I don't particularly like... Blonde guys, usually. Those are exceptions. Isn't it okay, Charles, for L.O.B. to not like a certain type of guy? Isn't it okay for a guy to say, I like black girls. That's what I like. I like black girls. Oh, yeah, it's definitely okay to say. But to say, like, I only date Mexican women would make me think, like, why? Because they cook. Because they clean. I mean, why? If that were the reason. If that were the reason, then it would be wrong. But someone for just to say, I only date.
If a guy said, listen, he hasn't said it. I know, but earlier a guy called in and he said, my buddy dates Asian girls and part of the reason is because usually they're financially stable. Okay, now that's a stereotype. That's right. That's a stereotype. I've known some train wreck Asian girls, so it's not all, you know. I've known train wrecks from all walks of life. Absolutely. From all walks, everybody. And I agree. How can you say that somebody from France can't walk into your life and you just be... Well, now I can say that. If you knew... I'm actually married to a French girl, Charles, so... Not from France, though. And there's no way... Her grandmother was. Her background. Okay. Her grandmother was from France. Yeah, you speak no Spanish in your Mexican. So technically, that makes her French. Right. Exactly. That's right. Thanks, dude. Let's see. M1 Sarah from North Park. Are you there? Hi, I'm here. What do you think about this? I'm a biracial woman and I just have had this debate going for years with my friends. It's so frustrating because, so who do I date, right? Because I'm biracial. Right. So then I have men that say, you know, well, I have these values or morals that I want in a woman and only this recent, you know, picture has that. And so what I end up finding is that I ask, I break them all, I break them down. I'm like, so tell me what it is.
Because I'm beautiful. I'm, you know, I'm an educated woman. I have a good job. Tell me what it is. And they can never actually come up with the variables. Well, what if it's because you look a certain way? Is there anything wrong with that? Well, no, that's fine. But not one race looks a certain way. There are certain things that certain races certainly have. Wait, wait, wait. Hang on. Hang on a second. African-American is African-American. Yeah, so I'm an African-American, Native American woman. And I don't look like... You know, a handful of other African-Americans. They come in all varieties, shades, sizes, colors. Hey, you're 100% right, but what if I like that? What if that's what I'm attracted to? And what if it's all I'm attracted to? And what if I... Well, if that's what I'm attracted to, there are other cultures and races that also embody that. Gosh, I'm so torn. Me too. What if you just like someone for physically what they look like, and that's your initial attraction? You can't explain what it is. So then don't say it's Asian. Say that it's... You know, whatever that is. I like, you know, whatever those variables are. It's killing me to not be able to say, it's killing me to not be able to say, I only like a girl because she's Asian. Why can't you say that? You can say that if that's with you. Like, I only like Asian women. But Woods, if you say you only like white girls, you are a freaking racist. Yeah, I'm a racist. How would you ever say that, though? I can't imagine just being that specific on any kind of girl. Say that again.
I said it seems so shallow. What are the qualities about the woman that you're actually talking about? Her breasts. I think that's what gets you farther, but I think initial attractions, we just can't help it. That's right, Sarah, and I think that you're making it a crime for me to like a girl because of the color of her skin. I think it's okay for me to be physically attracted to a girl because of the color of her skin. But why are you only physically attracted to that color of skin? I don't know. How about you don't know? How about the answer to it is, I don't know. I have a question for you, Mike. Go ahead. You are a Mexican man. Yes. Have you ever dated a Mexican woman? No. No. Why? Because you like what you like. It doesn't mean you're racist against Mexicans. Or just sometimes situational. And let me ask Sarah. Does that make me racist, Sarah?
I don't think that it makes you racist at all. I think that it means that you have a preference, but I don't understand why you wouldn't even try another flavor. How about this? You say you're biracial. Uh-huh. What if my flavor was only biracial girls, and specifically Caucasian and African American? That's my flavor. And I will only, every girl that I've ever dated has been that. Would that bother you? I would think that in the long run you'd be selling yourself short. But that's his call. I mean, you can't say to somebody, hey, because you haven't experienced a taste of every country, then you're selling yourself short. I've never been with an Indian woman, you know, from India. But I've hooked up with black girls, Mexican girls, whatever. I mean, it's... I married a white girl. This shouldn't be a chance for you to talk about how many girls you've hooked up with. That's not what I'm saying. That's not what I'm saying. He brought his belt out and was like, look at all these notches. He's showing us the notches, physically showing us the notches. Here's actually my bedpost I brought into this. M1 Chill from Carlsbad. Are you there? Yes, good morning. Good morning. Well, someone mentioned stereotypes earlier, and I'm not making this up. I'm sure some...
People out there have heard the stereotype of Asians that they tend to be lacking in the crotchal region. Oh, yeah. In the what? In the crotchal region. That Asian men are lacking in the crotchal region. Go ahead. Okay, well, I had a friend a while back. Who only dated Asian women because he assumed that they wouldn't be. I got you. We got it. We got you. I had to turn you down. We read you, though. I had to turn the volume down on you, but I know what you were going for there. And that sounds a bit ignorant. I have to admit, it does sound a bit ignorant. What? Absolutely. I agree. It's ignorant, but, you know. Lauren does not know where we're going. Okay, hang on, hang on. I'm going to show her. Do you get it, L.O.B.? Asian girl? Are you sure that's what she said? That's the rumor. Yes. That's exactly what she said. That's the rumor. It's not the rumor. That is the rumor. No, it is. Yes, it is. Yes, it is. How have we all heard of it then? Oh, my God. Because it's a, okay. That's the rumor. That's what I said. It's a.
That's a wives... That's a wives... A rumor! That's what a rumor is. That's what a rumor is. I've never heard that rumor, but I'm not a guy. That's a... Yeah, it's, you know... M1 Chill? Yeah. You should send us a picture. Oh, my gosh, Jay. Shut it. Weirdo? Weird. M1 Chill, thank you for the call. Sure. So, here's the thing. I said to you guys off the air once, and you took it and ran with it. I said if you had, like, a lineup of 10... African-American slash black, whatever the political correct way of saying it is. So 10 black guys, 10 white guys, I would find many more of them attractive in the lineup of black men. So does that make me racist? Yeah, you're white. You're racist against your own race. But I just... I just overall find more of them attractive. Of course it doesn't. But if you switch that around, you're a racist. You're a racist. Okay. So it's fine for you to say that you line up 10 black dudes, 10 white dudes. I like the black guys.
That's fine. But I'm saying unequivocally. Like, I'm not saying, like, they have to be a certain height. I'm just saying, like, if you took any random sample, I can guarantee you that I would find more of the black guys attractive. You're racist against whites. Yeah, you're racist. But if I said it the other way around, then you're fine. I'm still a racist. You're good to go. No, you're good. You're good. Well, she's racist against whites, but the other one, you're a real racist. Now, what you're about to hear is real. And I only say that because when I say to you or when I play for you what you're about to hear, you're going to say, that can't be. That can't be real. Not only is it real, it was one of the highlights of SportsCenter last night. And I, when Woods walked into the studio yesterday, said, Woods, Woods, Woods, Woods, Woods. I wanted him to look up at the television because they actually had footage of this professional bowler. Strike to claim it. A strike to claim it. And to claim it. A strike to claim it. And he got it. I'm going to start saying that. Absolutely. Who do you think you are? I am. Brilliant. That was a bowler that had the veins popping out in his neck. He was bright red. One more. So this is the bowler yelling that. Oh, yeah. Yes. I wasn't sure if it was the other announcer. Which, by the way, is why I said what you're about to hear is real. Strike to claim it. A strike to claim it. And he goes.
That guy likes bowling and he likes it hard. He likes it real good, dude. He likes bowling in the hardest possible way that you could like bowling. And he, he just knocked down, he just knocked down 10 pins. And you know, you want to know something? Who did it? I did it. That's who. That's who. He just said the most genius thing I've ever heard. How does it go? Who do you think you are? I am. That means if you think you're a hotshot. I am the hot shot. If you think you're a jerk, I'm the jerk. Yes. Who do you think you are? I am. That needs to be on a t-shirt. It needs to be on a t-shirt. Strike to claim it. Strike to claim it. And he got it. Does he say get it right? Can we isolate who do you think you are? I am. Woods, there's only a hundred isolates. I have a question for you guys. Yes, yes, L-O-B. It's a personal question. When you are with your wife. Yes. And you. The answer is yes. You say, who do you think you are? I am. Sounds like C.C. DeVille. Do you yell out maybe possibly random stuff? And then you think back and you're like, what did I say? Oh, yeah. Like in a fight? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. While lovemaking. Yes. Oh. I feel like that guy just had the equivalent. Yeah. Because he probably didn't even know what he was saying. L.O.B., do you? No, no, I don't, but.
Guys are weird. I know, but during... Oh, what she's saying is guys are weird. So when you get real excited, do you say stupid stuff? You say some things and then afterwards you're like, what did I just say? I might have before. Yeah. Who's the master of everything I am? In my younger days. Strike to claim it. Strike to claim it. And... Love that guy. That gentleman is so awake. I didn't know I got it wrong. He's not sleeping. No. He's so awake and alive. He's the best bowler in the world at that moment. At that moment. Nobody takes that from that guy. If there were a guy that said to him, I could take you. No. No, you can't. No, you can't. He went to the Comfort Inn that night, and he had the pick of the litter. Oh, yeah. Hey, he walked into that Comfort Inn lounge, and he knew. Listen.
It's a done deal. Who wants it? Who wants it? Just so you know, sir, we are closing at 10. No, you're not. Who do you think you are? I am. Who do you think you are? I am. Beer and wine here. Strike to claim it. Strike to claim it. And he got it! He is also speaking to every human being who has ever, in his life, doubted him. And not just in bowling. In life. In life. There was ever a human being that doubted anything that he's ever done. Mr. Ferguson, the shop teacher. Yeah. Thought he was a bum. Yes. One time, Jimmy Hanson in third grade said that he lost at a game, at Battleship. Right. To Jimmy Hanson, I just want you to know. Strike to claim it. A strike to claim it. And.
Or is he not talking to every human being? Kelly Delisi. Yeah, Kelly Delisi. All the broads, yeah. She said, I only date winners. Yeah, Dana McNamara. What do you think now? Who do you think you are? Get it right. That's right. Only the best in the world. All I can think of is Kingpin because he looked like one of those dudes from that movie. He had his wrist guard on, his cheap shirt. Oh, yeah. Like poofy, like helmet head. And Woods said, Woods goes. Hey, listen, competition's competition. You're fired up. You're fired up. If you win, I mean, look how excited we get when we win buzzword. Buzzword, yeah. We flip out. Yeah, I do a flip. I do a literal flip. How can, yeah, how can we ever, we can't say that whatever he did was in any way weird because we do the same thing when we win buzzword. Absolutely. I dance, would thrust the air. And there is a upsetness that happens when we don't. Oh, absolutely. Now, what's going to happen when that guy has the title taken away? Oh, dude. What's that day like? He should, like, pay in advance for some sort of, like, clinic. Yes. Because he's probably going to have to take some time off and just check out. He should put a down payment on a mental house. Yes. You know, and you see it in every sport. Aaron Rodgers, when he scores a touchdown, he does that dumb wrestling belt move, the discount double check they call it now, and it's like, you're like a child. You know, you're a child.
But we're all grown up little kids. We're all grown up little kids. And that guy was a little kid that just won the Professional Bowling Association. Strike to claim it. Strike to claim it. And... Great. Way to be humble, pal. He wears sunglasses in the video. He's got sunglasses while he's bowling. Amazing. Are you kidding? Incredible. I didn't remember that. Amazing. He's got sunglasses. He's got like the Oakley sunglasses on. He takes them off. He's freaking out. Oh, my God. We saw it right after he whipped them off. Really? You probably have to take the glare off. Oh, yeah. Fluorescent lights in there, you know? Oh, my. It's on the Mikey Show Facebook page. Who do you think you are? I am. I am. It's pretty, it's memorable if it's nothing else. There should be a t-shirt.
with a picture of a middle finger, and it says, who do you think you are at the top? And below it, it says, I am. There should be a picture of that guy. Oh, my God. That guy doing like a fist bump. With a finger. Yeah, with a finger. Who do you think you are? I am. That's genius. Amazing. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Would he give us an interview, or do you think he's too tied up? Jay, get that guy. Try to get that guy, Jay. Get that guy on the air. Let's see. Pure joy. That's just pure joy. Pure joy. According to researchers at Penn State, people have become less tolerant of women keeping their own last names, Lauren O'Brien, when they get married. In 1990, less than 3% of Midwesterners said a woman who keeps her name is less committed to marriage. By 2006, that number had more than tripled. The keep...
their last name error. You're not going to, right? You can't do it. To be determined. TBD. TBD. Please don't. Probably. Not you, right? Nicole, you would never do that, would you? Oh my. Oh my. What is the deal? What is, what's happening? You don't. Would you or would you not? Would you keep your last name? I love my last name, but I would probably change it. Yeah. Why? I actually had this talk with my boyfriend, and he said he'd be super pissed. He thinks it's really disrespectful. Thank you. There you go. Thank you. I agree with your boyfriend. Yeah. I agree with the boyfriend. My current film will say he thinks I'm kidding if I say it, and he pretty much said it's not up for debate, but the engagement is off. There you go. If I do it. Good man, man. I think professionally. You're Lauren Commerce. Not professionally. Come on. No way. You can keep a stage, man. No, no, no. I agree with her. She's Lauren O'Brien on the radio. But legally. Legally. My license will say it. Yeah. She'll be Lauren Comer. Yeah. Thank you. She's fighting with every inch of her being. I had never even said the two names together until Sunday. I was like, what? Lauren Comer? Yeah. I never even thought of it. LC. That's legit. LC. LC already exists. Question. Yes.
Oh, my gosh. She's got a middle child. You've got to be different. I don't want to be the other else. And that girl's name is Lauren, too. Lauren Conrad. Question. Yes. Would you consider doing stand-up as Lauren Commerce? No way. No way. Well, I don't know. It's catchy. I guess maybe I would. It's catchy. It's pretty cool. If I moved to, like, a new city, I would. Lauren Commerce. Sounds good. I'm telling you, though, it sounds pretty damn cool when they say Lauren O'Brien. I know. I know it does. It's a good name. From the O'Brien clan. I've had that name for 31 years. You know, I've grown pretty attached to it. By the way, she disputes us. She says her name is not Lauren. It's Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. And she goes. You guys don't have to say Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren.
What's wrong with you guys? Lauren. You guys have problems. Lauren. Not Lauren. Lauren. No owing it. Lauren. Diet Coke. She knows how to say it. M1 Diet Coke. This is the Mikey Show. FM 94.9. This is the FM 94.9. It's up there, my favorite Wookiee. It's Hillary with some shows here to go check out. Like tonight, you can go see He's My Brother, She's My Sister at the Casbah, Reptar at Soda Bar, Secret Fun Club at Tower Bar, or Charlie Hunter at Anthology. Next week, Walking Molly's at House of Blues on the 6th. On the 8th, see the silent comedy with Dead Feather Moon and the Howls at the Belly Up. Or Lagwagon at House of Blues on the 9th. English Beat do two nights at the Belly Up, March 16th and 17th. Pusifer plays California's Center for the Arts in Escondido on March 18th. And Ani DeFranco hits House of Blues March 20th. And still to come, shows from Colts, Portugal the Man, Polyphonic Spree, Tune Arts with St. Vincent, James, and Delta Spirit. So there you have it. Get out there.
For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 concert calendar online at fm949sd.com. Get your winner on at Mammoth Mountain. Mammoth is 100% open with the best terrain for your ski week adventures. Or for the fun and excitement of the U.S. Snowboarding and Free Skiing Grand Prix. February 29th through March 3rd. Don't just take their word for it. Three-time X-Game gold medalist Kaya Turski. How's the snow at Mammoth? The conditions are always picture perfect in Mammoth, warm and sunny. See you at Grand Prix. For lift tickets, lodging, and more, visit mammothmountain.com or call 800-Mammoth. Do you or someone you know suffer from anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, or schizophrenia? Are you interested in participating in a research study? Excel Research is seeking volunteers for clinical trials involving investigational medication. All study-related care is provided at no cost. Health insurance is not required, and you may be compensated for time and travel. To see if you qualify, call Excel Research at 760-758-2222. That's 760-758-2222. Hey, San Diego. It's Tony for Butoni. You know Butoni, the freshly made Italian pastas and sauces that'll send your salivary glands into overdrive. Well, they want more people to keep the Butoni name on the brain. So I'm asking you to help us cook up a jingle. Ooh, sounds like I got one cooking.
It's the delectable, exceptional, gastrointestinal delight of your night. Butoni, butoni, butoni, butoni. Oh, you make me feel so right. Think you can top that magic? Just go to Facebook.com slash Butoni USA and upload your original Cooking Up a Jingle lyrics by March 17th. We'll pick the top five, you vote, and the winner gets 5,000 smackeroonies. Go to Facebook.com slash Butoni USA for full lyric requirements, eligibility, and official rules. Void or prohibited. No purchase necessary. Contest open to legal residents of the 50 U.S. states in D.C. ages 18 and up. Interest must be received by 11-59 p.m. EST, March 17th. Voting closes 5 p.m. EST, April 4th. To protect your engine, you have to change the oil. For a very limited time, O'Reilly Auto Parts has a great deal with instant savings on 5 quarts of mobile, super-conventional motor oil and a micro-guard oil filter for $9.99. That's a price you won't find anywhere else. And that's not all. With this outstanding offer, get a $5 O'Reilly Auto Parts gift card after mail-in rebate.
Save now, save later, and protect your engine in the long run with five quarts of mobile super conventional oil and a micro guard filter for $9.99. Plus, get a $5 O'Reilly Auto Parts gift card after mail-in rebate. This offer won't last long, so hurry in today for instant savings. O'Reilly Auto Parts. Better parts. Better prices every day. Limits apply. See store for details. You'll learn our simple two-step system for flipping homes and get paid to learn the process. Hi, my name is Than Merrill, and I'm the star of A&E's hit TV show, Flip This House. My team and I are looking for 20 people in the San Diego area who want to learn how to make $10,000 to $40,000 per deal.
in your spare time without using any of your own money. San Diego is a perfect market for my system, and this week I'm holding a free two-hour educational workshop where you can learn how to make a lot of money flipping homes in your spare time. Interested candidates can get two free tickets to the workshop by calling 1-800-808-0379. Seating is extremely limited, so call right now to get your two free tickets at 1-800-808-0379. That's 1-800-808-0379. Buddy, down here in the cup holder. Yeah, it's us. Your spare change. Now look, this might seem strange, but frankly we've had it with just being tossed in here and forgotten about. And we want you to drive to Mickey D's right now and use us on something delicious. Like one of those 2 for 350 deals they got going on.
Head over to McDonald's for one of two awesome deals. Enjoy two classic Big Mac sandwiches for only $3.50. Or at breakfast, get two sausage McMuffin with egg sandwiches for only $3.50. That's double the delicious for, like, small change. Yeah, because if you don't, we're going to make a whole lot of noise. Right, boys? Most restaurants open late. Many open 24 hours. Limited time offer. Price of single item posted on menu board. Prices and participation may vary. McDonald's $1.49 Filet-O-Fish Fridays are back. A Filet-O-Fish sandwich with tartar sauce, American cheese, and crispy fish filet is just $1.49 every Friday for a limited time at participating McDonald's. My robotic assistant Al and I have tested out the new Scion IQ. Scion IQ is the world's smallest four-seater. Scion IQ has 11 airbags. Scion IQ is better than Al. Get to your local Scion dealer and check out the new IQ starting at $15,995. Scion, what moves you?
Size claim certified by AMCI Testing. Call 1-866-240-6684 for claim details. MSRP includes delivery, processing, and handling fee. Excludes taxes, title, license, and optional equipment. Dealer price will vary. On average, 1 in 30 homes get hit by termites. Get to them before they get to you with the Terminex Ultimate Protection Guarantee. Call 1-800-Terminex for your no-obligation inspection. Lots of slowing here on the 8. We'll start you off the 15 south to the 8 east connector. There's an accident there causing a delay. The 8 westbound before auto circle an accident. Lots of incidents this morning. The 805 southbound of the 54 connector. You've got the east side. You've got an accident, no injuries, and a big stretch of slowing here on the 805 from University Avenue to Market Street, 25 miles an hour. This report brought to you by SeaWorld San Diego. Enjoy amazing nighttime experiences with extended park hours during spring into night. There's never been a better time to get a SeaWorld fun card, pay for a day, play all year. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9.
And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. Grown-up stuff scares me. I hear words that really freak me out because I'm like, gosh, that sounds like a word my dad would use. Woods. I like to collect stuff. I collect sports stuff and all that, like memorabilia. Lauren. No way I'd rather freeze to death than be stuck on an elevator. You would? Yes. And Jay. I did have a big giant pickle barrel that I loved. On FM 94.9. If you're the kind that's interested, Apple stock. Just hit $532 a share. It was $75 a share in 2008. Sickening. I remember saying to my brother Steve, you should really get some of this stock. It's like $79 right now. I'm not paying $79 for a share of stock, pal. You know what he said to me? He goes, my friend Josh just told me that. He took himself in the shins right now with the rest of us.
Warren Buffett said the only technology he's buying right now is IBM. Which, when I heard it, I thought, I didn't know they were still a company. IBM? Yeah. A computer company? Yep. I didn't know. Warren Buffett knows his stuff. He's one of the richest guys in the world. Maybe it's like, you know, he does a lot of, like, charity work. Maybe he's, like, giving them money. Giving them charity. To help them out. Could be. That would be charity. That is charity. Because if he says it, people do it. Costa Concordia sunk, and that company is not having a good week. Yesterday, they had to tow one of their ships because there was an engine room fire. Can't catch a break. No. When it rains, it pours. When it rains, it pours. But it's hard to feel bad for them because this is the same cruise company.
that when their ship sank, they said to their passengers approximately three days later, don't worry, we'll let you sail again for 30% off. Yeah, 30% discount. Listen, if you want to go again, we can reschedule. The ship sunk. I was on it, and I had to grab my wife, and we had to jump in a lifeboat like Titanic. Costa Concordia. Yeah, I was on it. Si. We're not going to put you back on this boat. Right. I don't want to be on that boat. I really would just like my money back. No, we're going to not give you your money back because we're still going to send you out. My wife hurt her knee. Yeah, I have a torn patella. Yeah, she tore her patella. She had just made that up. No, she didn't. I couldn't tell. She paused for a minute. We want our money back.
You sons of bitches. She's a liar. No, I wouldn't go on that ship if you paid me with all the Nutella in the world. That's right. I'm going to make you an offer you can't refuse. Okay, I'm ready for your offer. I am going to let you two who almost perished at the bottom of the sea go next Tuesday when our ship departed from Roma, which is landlocked, by the way. Right. And I'm going to give you 30% off on this. Absolutely. Listen, that's the best. She was on a door in the middle of the ocean and I was hanging on her hand. You know, I can't even take baths anymore. Yeah, she's scared to death of the water. I can barely take a shower. She smells like a foot. What are you, a baby here? No, I was submerged in the Mediterranean Sea or wherever I was. She's on a door. And she doesn't smell like a foot. That is your actual foot. Well, he's scared of it, too. I'm scared of it, which pretty much makes him scared of it. That's right. Why do you so complain about? You're still here. Yeah, I'm still here. I want my freaking money back. Not a freaking chance in the world. 30%. I've watched two documentaries on the sinking of the Concordia. Weird.
It's so good. Already. Oh, the information. Oh, give me more information. Tell me about the bow. Tell me about the port. Tell me about the angle. Are you going to go to the Titanic Museum that's in town? Oh, yeah. One thousand percent. You better go before it leaves. Yes, I am. Before it sets sail. I'm going to. I'm going to as well. I think it looks cool. I do too. I want to see Rose's pen. Rose's pen. I want to see all of it. I want to see Jack's sketchbook. Fictional character. It's not fictional. It's in the documentary Titanic. What if there is a picture? I want to see that. I would be so pissed off. You walk in there and you're like, that's Kate Winslet. It's the picture of her. They're trying to pass it off.
As if it's an artifact. You're like, hey, wait. I know that that's Kate Winslet. There's a plastic heart pen. Listen to this. There are countries that have different flavors of Pepsi. For instance, cucumber. Sounds good. Cucumber? Yeah. In Russia, they've got ice cream flavored Pepsi. That's good. That sounds okay. That sounds all right. In Poland, they have apple-flavored Pepsi. He sounds good. In Guam and Thailand, they have hot cinnamon and cool mint Pepsi. It's not gum. And in Japan, where by far, every time Andrew Zimmern has eaten weird foods, the grossest, most disgusting, in my opinion, is from Japan. Yeah. Japan enjoys cucumber-flavored Pepsi. And they're also the strawberry milk people. I like it. Strawberry milk-flavored Pepsi. I don't know about that, but... Laverne thinks that's gross. Yeah, Laverne from Laverne and Shirley. Thinks that's the sickest thing ever. I'm surprised nowhere has bacon-flavored Pepsi. Oh, I'm sure it's coming. Bacon's in everything. I just found cucumber-flavored Gatorade, and it was fantastic. Oh, that's so sick. Oh, my God.
I am so sorry. I am so sorry to do that to everyone. Wow. I just did that to thousands of people. Oh, my gosh. That was so loud. What is happening? I don't know, but I wish I'd have worn a diaper today if I'd known that that was going to happen. Oh, my gosh. Something else for us to worry about, Woods? Yes. You take sleeping pills. I take sleeping pills. Yes, sir. And New Studies out says there's something very bad that's going to happen. Perfect. Mikey Show now. Text them at 949mikey at gmail.com. Or call Mikey now. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. It's stock up time this weekend at Vaughn's. Because with the Vaughn's weekend sale Friday through Monday, you'll find incredible Vaughn's Club prices all over the store on things you use day in and day out. Selected sizes and varieties of post-honey bunches of oats, Quaker Life, and Cap'n Crunch cereals are just $1.99 each. Start your day with bacon from the Vaughn's meat department.
Right now, 12-ounce packages of Farmland Slice Bacon are buy one, get one of equal or lesser value free with Vons Club. Quench your thirst with 12 packs of Coca-Cola, Pepsi, or 7-Up cans. They're buy two, get two of equal or lesser value free, plus CRV selected varieties must buy four. And head to the Vons Produce Department for a family favorite. Eight-pound bags of Safeway Farms Naval Oranges are only $3.99 each. Plus, don't miss other spectacular Vons Club specials. We have thousands. Selected sizes and varieties of liquid-tied detergent are just $5 each. And selected varieties of craft singles are only $3.99 each. All this and more all weekend long at Bonds. Ingredients for life. Hear that? That's the sound of you waking up to another day at your dead-end job. I just really need you to have a more positive attitude with the customers. We've been over this before. And that? That's the sound of your boss getting on your case again. That? That's your wake-up call to make a change. Now hear this. That's the sound of you calling California College San Diego at 1-800-390-6489 so you can begin career training that can change your life. Call 1-800-390-6489. All it takes is one phone call to learn more about how California College San Diego can help you get the career you want and deserve. That's 1-800-390-6489. 1-800-390-6489. Call now. There are different types of fresh.
There's youthful. And then there's category-defining, envelope-pushing, convention-breaking fresh. Like the 2012 Mercedes-Benz lineup, the youngest and freshest in luxury car class. Consider the 2012 E-Class. With innovative technology features like Attention Assist and Distronic Plus, the E-Class now boasts a more powerful, fuel-efficient direct-injection engine. Lease the 2012 E350 Sport Sedan, an IHS top safety pick. For just $5.99 a month for 33 months with $4,369 due at signing. A new year, a new level of innovation from Mercedes-Benz. Available only to qualify customers exclusively through Mercedes-Benz Financial Services and participating dealers through February 29, 2012. Some equipment described as optional. Call 1-800-F1-Mercedes for offer details. See your Mercedes-Benz dealer of San Diego County. Visit Hone Motors in Carlsbad, Mercedes-Benz of Escondido, and Mercedes-Benz of San Diego. Mike Rowe here with Jim Twitchell, Senior Master Technician for Ford. Jim, a lot of people hear about the works and they figure it's an oil change. No, Mike, it's not just an oil change. The works includes an oil change, tire rotation, multipoint inspection, and more. Just $29.95 or less after $10 rebate at your local Ford dealer. What doesn't it include? That list is probably very short. Blub compartment, you check that. Up to five quarts oil, Texas diesel, and disposal fees extra. See participating Ford dealer or visit FordOwner.com for rebate details through 331-12.
I bought my husband a Falcon. Excuse me? You saved my husband over $480 by switching to State Farm, and he bought a Falcon with it. How awesome is that? We can't control what our customers do with their savings. Stop buying him frivolous things. What do you want me to do? Buy me frivolous things. Save an average of $480 when you switch your auto policy to State Farm. Get to a better state. Call 1-800-STATE-FARM today. Average household savings based on 2010 National Survey of New Policyholders reported savings by switching to State Farm. Over 200,000 customers are having a better hair day because of Ovation Cell Therapy. I had a brush full of hair every day. Since I started using Ovation, my hair is fuller and it's not falling out in the shower or the brush. Ovation also worked for my husband with his breakage. Thanks for a wonderful product. I'm a 40-year-old woman with extremely fine hair, and I've been coloring it for over 25 years. Using Ovation has decreased my hair loss and increased the fullness of my hair. I plan on using this product for the rest of my life. Ovation works great. After my baby was born, my hair was falling out and breaking off like crazy. Now my hair looks and feels better and is growing faster than it ever has.
Thanks, Ovation. For thicker, stronger, and longer hair, log on to OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout for a special introductory discount. That's OvationHair.com. And remember to enter FM94.9 at checkout for your special discount. OvationHair.com. My robotic assistant, Al, and I have tested out the new Scion IQ. Scion IQ is the world's smallest four-seater. Scion IQ has 11 airbags. Scion IQ is better than Al. Get to your local Scion dealer and check out the new IQ starting at $15,995. Scion, what moves you? Size claim certified by AMCI testing. Call 1-866-240-6684 for claim details. MSRP includes delivery processing and handling fee. Excludes taxes, title license, and optional equipment. Dealer price will vary. The members of Think Blue San Diego region remind you that the storm drain and sewer systems in San Diego County are not connected. Everything that enters storm drains, including trash, flows untreated directly into our local waterways. Do your part to keep San Diego County clean and prevent pollution by properly disposing of trash and by keeping your sidewalk and gutters clean.
around your home. For more information and to learn about what your city is doing to prevent stormwater pollution, visit thinkbluesdregion.org. This report brought to you by Pro Nutrients. New Pro Nutrients, a line of three select supplements from the makers of Centrum. Help make nutrition possible. Boy, still lots of slowing this morning. The 8 is really tied up. The 8 westbound, the drive from the 805 south all the way down to Fletcher Parkway, very slow, about 17 miles an hour. Heading into La Mesa, there's an accident here. Fletcher Parkway, the on-ramp to the 8 eastbound. Also some problems over here on the 54, the 54 westbound at the 805 north. You've got a hit and run. Doesn't look like any injuries, though. Swinging up towards the 52, you're going to find some delays. The ramp from the 125 to the 125 south on the 52 westbound speeds between 8 and 13 miles an hour there. This report brought to you by In-N-Out Burger. In-N-Out Burger where your double-double and fries are made fresh the moment you order them, not a moment before. In-N-Out, that's what a hamburger is all about. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm not macho.
Woods. I've never realized how fat I was until I got on a skateboard. Oh, wow. Lauren. I like it. A guy that's off Facebook is cool. And Jay. Oh, the recliner's mandatory. On FM 94.9. Lav, lava. You gotta clean if you had lava or something. You gotta have lava. Let's do some new release. Some new release. Yeah, absolutely. Got a few out on CD today. Ja Rule's got a new record out. It's called Pain Is Love 2. Yeah, man. Am I a dork if I listen to that? Because I'm not cool enough. No. All right. Is that a re-release or something?
No, I don't think so. Nope. It's called Pain Is Love 2. He sampled that beat before. What else you got? Lyle Lovett has a new record out. Release me, it's called. Release me from listening to that. Yes, please do. Let me tell you. Oh, Lyle. Yeah! You have to really love. Lyle Lovett. Absolutely. He has one song that I like and I own. I own one Lyle Lovett song. You're not a passive Lyle Lovett fan. I am. If you're buying this record, there is no such thing as the passive Lyle Lovett fan if you're buying that record. Yes. You like Lyle Lovett and you like him hard. You like him good, yeah. The only thing I know about him is that he bagged Julia Roberts even though he looked the way that he does. Yeah. And he's not a very attractive man at all. The Cranberries have a new record out. It's been a long time. It's called Roses. Tell them Cranberries. Think she's ever been to Dublin? Absolutely. Out on DVD today, Hugo, the Martina Scorsese. Martina Scorsese. Yes, he won a couple of awards for this one. Martina Scorsese. Martina Scorsese. Martina Scorsese.
Martin Scorsese. Martin Scorsese. Martin Scorsese. Martin Scorsese. Martin Scorsese. Martin Scorsese. Martin Scorsese. Ouch. Ouch. Oh, my gosh. It makes me cry, dude. You can't see his name anymore. Uh-uh. Ever. Ever. Listen, all our listeners are like, every time I hear the name Martin Scorsese, all I can think is. Martin Scorsese. Martin Scorsese. I love it. It is so shaky. So shaky. For sure. Also on DVD, Johnny English Reborn starring Rowan.
Freaking Atkinson. Otherwise, no. That's your boy, Mr. Bean. What is it? No wonder you started that rumor. You're trying to hype his movie. Does it feel like the day now, like, finally, Mike, you got to it. He's going to go. You finally got to say it. Right away. Yeah. Oh, he's already. He's probably got the newsletter. I don't like Mr. Bean. You freaking love him. You have it out on Blu-ray already? Yep. Gosh, Woods and Mr. Bean, dude. So tight. So stupid. He freaking loves. So stupid. He loves. He calls him Bean. Yeah. He's president of the fan club. I don't like Mr. Bean. I don't not like him, but I don't love him. You love his humor. You do. You love it. You love his humor. You're always doing his bits around the office. Always. Always trying to make us watch him. Everybody. Posted Mr. Bean on your page. Posted Mr. Bean on my page yesterday. Tell me what it is about his humor that you really like. Is it the facial expression? It's got to be. It's got to be. Or like a little voice? Or is it just his zany? Is it his like tiny motions? His pratfalls? His suit. Oh my gosh. I don't like Mr. Bean. You love him. What's liking Mr. Bean is phenomenal.
And now he's got a new movie. So are you upset that it's not the Mr. Bean franchise? No. What did Rowan.net say? I don't know. Oh, gosh. New movie out today. And it's called. I have to look. Act like you don't know. Fake paper. Don't know. Johnny English Reborn. There you go. Very excited. Hey, this will come as a big surprise to people. It came as a huge surprise to me. I thought that those video games on the Wii made kids physically active and basically did the same thing that exercise would. Turns out, it doesn't. Hey, you're not really playing tennis. You're not really bowling. I know, but I thought you were not bowling and not tennis. But some of those have you dancing and stuff. I thought the Wii Fit was like a treadmill type thing. There was just a study that got published in the Journal of Pediatrics found no evidence that kids who used active video games were more active in general or at any time. There's even a message that pops up that says like to go outside. Yeah. Really? Go play. Yeah. Nuh-uh. Yeah. Why?
To encourage the kids to go outside and play? Yeah. Isn't that counterintuitive to the game? If the kids hooked on the game, they know they got them no matter what. Pepsi don't tell you to go have a Coke. Casinos do. Casinos say, hey, if you've got a problem with gambling, you get out and go see somebody. Yeah, that's true. But leave us your money. Yeah, I mean, hit the blackjack table before you split. Hey, get on the way out. We also have a lobster buffet. That's right. The problem with the gambling, if you have to quit cold turkey, then they never get your money again. If you have some sort of problem, they'd rather have you just put it in regularly. Healthily. M1, Lulu from Mira Mesa. Hello. What was the word of the day? Lava. Lava. Congratulations to you. You just won a four-pack of tickets to the Nationwide Series when NASCAR comes to Fontana. Auto Club Speedway, four tickets, very high in demand. That's Saturday, May 24th, and you're going. Thank you. Hang on the line. Thank you. Pretty awesome. Thank you, Jay. He didn't have that sound effect. Jay's just giving up on his actual sound effects. He just does them by voice now. So people like you and I, Woods, that take sleep medication are 4.6 times higher risk of death from cancer. Ah.
than people that don't use any sleep medication. It's cool. You guys, just stop it. Yeah, I can't. Quit napping. Yes, you can. I don't nap, D. I haven't napped all year. Well, then just go to bed. I can't. This brain doesn't shut off. Imagine. I never thought of it. Yeah. Go to bed. I should just lay my head down and go sleep. Oh. Tough it out. You got to work at it. It has nothing to do with being tough. You got to work at it. Yeah. You're just a quitter. Badass cadet. No. A badass would fall. I fall asleep hardcore, man. I'm sure the caveman just went out and got something. 30 seconds. You should try sleeping upside down on the bed. Oh, my God. Or maybe reading a book. I take a half an Ambien. A half. A half of one of these. I take a half. So you're two times more likely instead of four times more likely. Go for a walk. I freaking work out every day, jackwad. 30 minutes doesn't count. 30 minutes doesn't count. I hate him. Yeah, you're not tough. Yeah, I'm not tough because I can't sleep. I'm now a P word. Yes. I'm a big P word because I can't go to bed. Have you tried to sleep without it? And I have before. I'm now hooked. Real men can tough it out. You're now hooked. I'm now hooked. Yeah, well, your body's quit producing that chemical that makes you go to sleep. It's called melatonin. Yeah, there you go. I can't sleep. What do you want me to do? Go to sleep.
If I had a Billy Club right now. Uh-oh. The lovely and talented Hillary is up next, and so is 94 minutes of nonstop rock. 94 minutes. It's coming up next. The Mikey Show will be back tomorrow morning at 5.30. We're out.