The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 03/04/10

0:00KBZT San Diego, a Lincoln financial media station. The new home of the Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. It's a Mikey Show. And you can give us a call. Our phone number, 5701-949. And you can also text message us if you want to. Text message is 949mikey at gmail.com. Very easy. And we made it that way. So you get a hold of us very easy because a lot of people are shy. They're too shy to call in, but they're OK texting. And if that's you, we'd love to hear from you. 949 Mikey at Gmail dot com. If you'd like to. Let's see. Let's introduce everybody. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. Woodsy is our sports guy and he is 34 years of age.

3:24Good morning. Yeah, how you doing, bro? I'm good. Real quick, before I didn't want to interrupt, but I just want to say happy birthday to my nanny, who turned 74 today. And for those of you guys that don't know what a nanny is, that's my grandmother. I have a nanny. You have a nanny, too? Yeah. Well, my nanny is the best nanny, and it's her birthday. So, happy birthday. I love you. Happy birthday. How old is she? 74. Oh, wow. I'm sure she would really appreciate you saying that over the airwaves. She's a sweetie. She's listening right now, too. Your nanny is my dad's age. Really? How about that? Interesting. How about that? Let's see. There's something wrong with my chair. You look really uncomfortable. He's losing it. Do you need me to go take a break? I'll take the mic. I'm trying to figure my chair out. You can do it. Jay! I'm trying to figure my chair out. The way he said that was hilarious. You sound like Team Gum. I know it. I'm trying to figure my chair out. I can't quite figure out my chair. Let's see. Let's introduce everybody. We got Lauren O'Brien. Lauren's 29 years old, and she is a comedian and assistant producer here on The Mikey Show. Sienna's our news girl. She's 24, and she's from La Jolla, grew up in La Jolla, raised in La Jolla. And we also have Jay, who is our executive producer. And when you call in...

4:46That's the voice that you hear. You talk to Jay. And you can do that by calling 570-1949 because when we start out the show, we basically open up phone lines to you for anything that you want to do and anything that you want to call in about. So it's totally up to you. You can call in about anything today. The things that we're talking about, obviously, this morning are new developments in the Chelsea King case. We're talking about the kid. that was doing a very adult job. We'll be talking about that a little bit later. Very adult. Very adult job. Not adult in a sexy times kind of way, but adult in like an adult way. Of course, that's what I thought of. Nope, it ain't that. There is a, also a, there was another attack. We'll tell you where in San Diego County that happened. And the woman that refused the full body scan. Now, well, first of all, what we got to understand here is we talked about the story the other day, what the full body scan is all about and the full body scan.

5:53is this new thing that they're implementing that is at the airports where you stand there, right, Sienna? And you put your hands out and they scan you? Yeah, they have it at the Chicago airport right now. It's at a few random airports. And they're apparently going to be making their way to every airport eventually. Obama put all this money towards it for safer flights and everything. And when you walk through this security device, they can see everything. Stop, because it's creeping me out. By everything, I mean... Like basically your private parts. Yeah. You know, like they get a full picture. Yeah. And the thing is, is, you know, a lot of people like I know Mikey was not stoked on that at all. Well, yeah, because I don't want people to see, you know, how unattractive it is here. You know what's going on? The people that do see everything are in another room. They do not have your name. They cannot see your face. They just examine the body and the image of the body. They're just going. Exactly. So they can see, you know, every little thing in your pocket. Please. I mean, everything. Yeah. I'd rather be shamed than dead, though. Really? Yes. Would you rather be dead? I would rather... I don't think that's the only way to tell if people have things on them. That's the...

7:05Ticket. Boy, but it sure is a good one. All right. No way. I'm on board. No way in the world. So what happened was earlier this week, a Muslim woman was at the airport in Manchester. She was flying to, where was she going? Pakistan. And she was randomly stopped and told that she needs to go through the full body scanner. Now she said, no, I'm not going through that. I have medical reasons. I'm not going to go through that. She was traveling with another woman that was with her going to Pakistan as well. She said, I'm not going through that either. So they both said, look, we're going to give up our ticket to Pakistan and we're not going to go through that. This is ridiculous. Sienna, why did you do the air quotes when they said randomly picked these two Muslim women? I get that. I didn't do the air quotes. You didn't? No. I wasn't watching. I didn't do the air quotes. You didn't? No, but I guess these two women are the first passengers who have refused these new scanning machines. So it's going to cause quite a big deal to a lot of people. So, Sienna, they didn't let him fly? No. That's ridiculous. I know. They said they wouldn't go through.

8:06It must be the law. And they're saying, hey, listen, it's the law. You have to abide by it. And if you don't, you're going to be in a lot of trouble. I mean, it doesn't say what happened really in this article other than that they refused to go through it. But I'm sure what happened is they pulled him in another room. You know, they searched them manually without having to go through a machine and everything was figured out. But it doesn't say that here. I can't see them saying, well, you're not getting on the plane. If they have medical reasons, you know, you can't force them. And who knows what. that thing's doing to your body. Yeah. I don't know what that thing's all about. How can we know? It's two minutes old. Woods doesn't care. He's like... Yeah, dude. I mean, do you guys not remember 9-11? I do. Yeah. I'm in. Anything that I hate to fly and anything that is going to protect me from dying, I'm in on. I agree, but these are very new machines, and if they could cause you dying, for all we know, I mean, people are going to question them for a while. Yeah. I wonder if pregnant women are allowed to go in them. Oh. I don't know. Oh. Probably not, because they can't do x-rays and stuff like that. Yeah, I think it's, I don't want anybody seeing stuff on me and laughing, and I know that they're going to. There's the Sparza. Yeah. Oh, I know.

9:19Dude, that's Mikey for sure. There's so many worse people out there, bro. Hey, listen, unless the people that are doing it, their name ends with P-H-D, then I don't want them looking at me and my stuff. Well, not to mention that we had a listener send us what happens when you, what do you call it, reversing it? What do you mean? Remember we had that listener send us a picture of what happens when you reverse the image? What happens? You can see. Everything. The outline of everything. And you have kids going through this. You don't have to reverse it, do you? I mean, I thought that's what they see no matter what. When they look at it, it's just they see your naked body. I think they see the outline of everything. Right. And then once you, if you flip the colors, I don't know exactly. I didn't realize that was the case. I thought that when they looked through the screen, they saw your naked body. They can't see everything in detail, no. Yeah, they're not seeing like.

10:17Like naked skin. They don't see like hair on your chest. It's like the outline of your piece. I thought it looked like an x-ray of your piece. It does. Well, if you think it's like an x-ray, yeah, because on an x-ray you can't see every detail. But Lauren is saying that in order for it to look like an x-ray of your piece, they got to reverse something or turn something around on it? Yeah, I forget exactly what the word was. If that was a deal, maybe it wouldn't affect me as bad. I just saw initially. when Sienna first presented the story, you saw what the scanners see. Oh, well, then that is bad. You're still not okay with it, but the picture that the listener sent us was an even more detailed... Oh! Oh! If you're muffin topping it in your pants, you can see the muffin topping it. Oh, yes. Good deal. I'm going to look like a cupcake, bro. So what? No! You're going to be alive. Get. Get. A cupcake. M1 Ryan, what's going on, dude? Good morning, Mikey. I just wanted to call and tell you, ever since you switched stations, I love the show. I go to the same church as you, and that's one of the reasons I listen to you. And just to let the King family know that my heart and prayers go out to them. That's one of the most horrific stories I've heard ever. Thank you. I appreciate the sentiment, and I appreciate everything that you're saying, dude. Thank you very much for the call. All right.

11:43Lauren is now, okay. Lauren's pulled up an image of the body scan to show Mikey. Okay, first of all, just the regular one that they're looking at, before they do anything, they call it invert, which I don't even know what that means, inverting the image. But before they invert it, when you're just looking at what looks like a regular x-ray, you can see everything. But once they do the invert thing, it's like you're looking at a black and white, you know, like Ansel Adams of some naked chick. Let me see that, Lauren. Let's see it. I mean, dude. Oh, yeah, that's hot. You can see. That girl's smoking hot. You can see hair. Yeah, I guess you can see. You can see. Creepiness. Details of a breast. I'm telling you how long. I would post it on the website, but it's indecent. It's indecent. Lauren's having major, major problems here, dude. Jay just ran in here. Oh, boy. Look under. Jay's like, you'll see the problem if you look under. There we go. That's. Hey, y'all. Oh, boy. This early? Already? I'm the new station manager here, and I just need to let y'all know that I think it'd probably be a good idea if you don't talk about indecency. Like?

12:55Naked. I said breasts. I wouldn't say breasts or naked. I wouldn't say any of that stuff. I think you're going to get us a fan. That's not funny. And that ain't funny. I said, don't say anything that's going to get us in trouble. Now, y'all are talking about nakedness. Well, we have to tell the story in the way it is. We're reporting a story. Yeah, it's kind of the facts. Why don't y'all think of different words? Like what? You know, say things like, They're cutie patootie or something like that. Say they're patootie or something. That sounds a little more graphic, actually. Patootie? Maybe you go grab us some donuts and we can start rocking our show. Ooh, that's a good idea. Where's your Dockers? I'm not wearing Dockers, dude. Oh, yes you are, Woods. Oh, yes you are. I'm telling you, I'm not wearing Dockers. Y'all are all wearing them. Nope. Uh, no. I promise you. Y'all should be happy that I don't institute the family rule. What's that?

13:55That means your family's got to wear them, too. Oh, wow. How could you ever institute that? Well, first of all, I didn't institute it. Wow. I didn't institute it anything. Okay. Somebody's very bitchy this morning. Hey, wait a second. Hang on a minute. We've got the grammar police. Yeah, that's right. And I'll write you a citation, all right? That is fun. I think it is. 1001 is what you count before you hit the horn. I did. I counted more of a 1,003 myself. Should we explain this again, Hoyle? Why don't you explain why you want us to use this? Good reset. Now, here's how it works. If I tell a joke, all right? All right. No. We just don't get it, dude, because it's really corny. Okay, let him explain. It's all right. I can explain it. I can explain it. I went to the McCovey School of Comedy. How many schools did you go to? I went to a few. But the reason is because it makes you funny if you go to comedy school. But you're not that funny. Oh, dude, I'm hilarious. You don't even know. You don't even... Listen, listen. Now that was a joke. The way that it works is if you say something funny, you wait 1,001, you count 1,001 in your head, not out loud, and then you hit the horn.

15:26I counted 1,000. Why does she hit that horn so strange? When she does, it makes that little, eh, eh. She needs a man. No, she needs a man to do it. Oh, wait. That's how a man honks a horn? Can I show you how to honk the horn? I think we're losing some juice on the horn. Oh, that wouldn't be the worst thing that would ever happen. Oh, no. Or you'll see you can't do it either. I think y'all might have gotten the freaking horn. Oh, you brought it to us. Should we go to plan B? That's if something's really funny is when you hit that. Oh, okay. Y'all got to be careful. You are one interesting station manager, Hoyle. Hoyle is a trip, right? And yeah, did he tell you the news? What? Tell him, Hoyle. Here's the deal. I've decided until I feel comfortable with y'all, I'm just going to sit. I'm going to be quiet. Are you? I'm going to be quiet. Are you? I'm going to sit here in the studio with y'all until I feel comfortable with it. Are you serious? Perfect. You see, that's why I have to sit in the studio. Now, this makes a big difference. What? Well, when I worked with Booger and Prescott at the mobile...

16:52Booger. They didn't get it either. But after a little while of Uncle Hoyle sitting in the studio, it made a lot more sense. Where were Booger and Prescott located? Mobile, Alabama. This is San Diego. We have a little bit different audience. You know, I think people overestimate the audience. He's going to be observing us. Yeah, he's going to be observing us. And Hoyle, don't you think that's a little insulting to say that? We overestimate the audience? Yeah. I mean, wouldn't it be nicer to say that we underestimate the audience? That would be nice, yeah. That ain't true, though. I think y'all think that the audience is smarter than they actually are. They can be very stupid. No. They can be really. I'm telling you. I learned that when I was in Mobile, Alabama. I said to the audience. In fact, when I got fired for it. But we used to have.

17:50Easy, Hoyle. You need some water? We used to have a sweeper on the air that said the audience is stupid. 98.9. Wow. Why don't you sit this one out, Hoyle? You're kind of shock jocks, Booger and Prescott, then. Well, they were working on that. It didn't work out for any of us. I got fired that next day. I bet. I learned from that. I learned a big deal. We got M1 Vladimir on the line calling about his dad. Are you there, Vladimir? Hey, what's going on, guys? Good morning to you. What's going on? Morning. Real quick, congratulations on the new bride. Oh, thank you. I didn't get to call in before, so sorry about that. Oh, thank you very much. Quite welcome. Yeah, well, I heard the news about the kid, you know, in the air tower, and I thought that was really cool. I'm sure the dad was controlling everything. I'm sure he would verify and say, yes, that's correct. When I was about seven, Now, are you guys familiar with these big freight trains, these diesel freight trains? Yeah, that's what my brother does for a living. He drives the big trains. Well, that's what my dad did in St. Louis. And you're talking about like 100-car trains, easy. And one day, and he wasn't even with me, but one day he took me to work. And it's a real family-friendly environment. He went off to one train, and he sent me with one of these. They called him fireman at the time.

19:15And it's just a guy who's, you know, with the engineer. And the fireman set me in the seat with a couple of other guys. And I got to drive one of those trains. And, I mean, I was full in control of everything. And I was heavily monitored, obviously. And they were right there in case I made a mistake, which I didn't make one or two. But, I mean, I think that's a totally cool thing. And you were seven years old. I was seven, yes. Okay, well. For those of you that do not know what Vladimir is talking about, when we come back, we're going to tell you exactly what he's talking about. We haven't talked about it yet. We haven't talked about it yet. We're going to tell you what he's talking about. There is a little bit of outrage from people. Great segue. I personally don't think that there's any problem with it at all. A lot of people do. A lot of people think that there's a big problem with it. We'll explain what this kid was doing. Then you tell us. We'll do that when we come back, and we're going to do a little Woods on Sports as well.

20:35Listening to the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Wow, Cesar Gonzalez from Mama Testa Taqueria. Hey, Brian from the Nervous Records. I wanted to stop in here after hearing Tim Piles talk about Mama Testa. Tell me about your chorizo. Oh, man, let me tell you about my chorizo. We make it fresh every day in the restaurant. We spice it up like only the way Mama knows. We don't use any of that greasy stuff you get at other places. Yeah, it's not greasy. Not greasy at all. My buddy Mark tried them. What'd you think, Mark? I tried the El Pastor tacos. What's up with the pineapple? We marinate it for 24 hours and then we grill it with grilled pineapple. Delicious, sweet, sour, spicy, all at the same time. Hey, Brian from the Nervous Records. What are you doing here hanging out with Mark and Caesar? Hey, Tim Piles. We're just eating some food. Really? Are you sure you're not cutting a commercial? No, man, we're just having a conversation. Really? Yeah, are we supposed to be cutting a commercial? I'm a musician. I don't endorse things. Oh, this is awkward. Maybe I should write a jingle. AT&T gives you the freedom to build your own bundle from four choices, including wireless phone service. Because Americans love choices. You could call us choice-a-holics. That's why our Mexican restaurants offer dozens of lunch combos. Mmm, guacamole.

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24:01out when the next community beach cleanup is just go to fm949sd.com and click on the echo village icon supported by think blue san diego bevmo presents the five cent sale word get one more yes technically that's three words but when you can buy one bottle of wine and get a second for just five cents why limit yourself to one word or one bottle for that matter bevmo's five cent sale is on choose for more than 200 great wines like han sarah Gnarly Head Chardonnay and Sterling Limited Release Meritage. Club Bev members, buy one bottle, get the second for just five cents. Get one Moe and save Moe at BevMo. Nothing. Every opportunity in front of you. The world's forward-thinking companies behind you. The Pacific Ocean beside you. Nothing standing between you. The Rady School of Management at UC San Diego. Innovators under construction. Learn more at rady.ucsd.edu. This report, it is brought to you by Firestone Complete Auto Care. Take advantage of unbeatable savings on the tires and automotive service that you need during the spring savings event. It's going on right now at Firestone Complete Auto Care. Call 1-800-LOCATE-US for the location nearest you. On the 905 westbound ramp to Smythe Avenue, we've got a disabled car. It's on the left shoulder. It's right over that fog line. And a little action here this morning on the 94 eastbound at the 15. We've got a car chase that has ended. Police are on the right shoulder with the abandoned car, but that suspect.

25:26is out on the loose. He's running around. They haven't caught him yet. This report brought to you by Toyota Motor Sales USA. Your Toyota dealer is committed to your satisfaction. They've extended their hours, added associates to take care of your service needs and answer questions and address your concerns. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's fun and funky. You're in luck. It always starts out fun and then it gets weird. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Hey, when I give you these keys, I'm wet on wood, my car, man. This is the number one R&B song in the country right now. Trace songs. Sounds like he's talking about champagne and gold. I bet you're dancing to that song. None of us in this room would be able to do it. Well, some of us in this room couldn't even dance.

26:30Some of us, we won't mention names, but his initials are Mikey. SW was right behind you, dude. That's right. Steve, you do not feel you are a good dancer. Who is Steve, by the way? Well, you said SW. That's what made me think it. Woodsy, you don't dance, right? No. I haven't hit a basket in three days. You've been trying to throw stuff in the garbage. You haven't made one. I have not made a basket in three days. I tried to get Woods to dance with me, the bride, at my wedding, and he ran away like a little girl. Really? Yep. And he kept telling me to dance the whole time. He's like, come on, get out there. Were you doing that because if I got out there, you'd get out there? Yes. Did you dance, Lauren? Uh-uh. Not one time? No. How come? Party poopers. I don't know. You just wouldn't do it? We were waiting for a slow dance. Still didn't do it. Okay, so here's the story. What was it, Sienna? Bring your child to work day? No, it was not. But apparently someone thought it was a good day to bring the kid to work. So where did it happen and what happened? JFK Airport. And a little boy was there in the air trafficking tower with his dad, who does the air trafficking. He talks to pilots as they're flying in. And he told his kid what to say. And the kid...

27:48Talk to pilots on numerous planes. Let's take a listen. This is the kid actually sitting in the seat and doing it. Clear for takeoff. Clear for takeoff, JetBlue 171. Let me see, you're at Mexico 403 Kennedy. I'm on the way through left position. Mexico 403. This is what you get, guys, when the kids are out of school. Try to bring my kid to work. 31 contact departure. Order departure, JetBlue 171. Awesome job. Zero three, clear for takeoff. Clear for takeoff. Thank you very much. You have a great day. Max 403, contact, departure, adios. Contact, departure, right, obey. Adios, genius. 4195 with 310 at 1-3. I'm sorry, Delta 216, can't even wait through in left position. It's no 3-1-love, Delta 26. Adios, amigos. Genius. Adios, amigos, over to departure, Delta 195. Genius. Yeah. You could do great. I have no problem with it. Zero problem. Zero. Does anybody on the show, myself,

29:02Sienna, Woods, Lauren, or Jay have a problem with it. Yeah. Really? Lauren? Weird. Come on. Why is it weird? Come on. Talk to me. Really? Lauren is known for disagreeing with all of us. Yes. I am? Yes. Really? Let's talk through this. Oh. Did he have permission to bring his kid in? I don't know. No. I just feel like that. particular job now i think it's really cute and that's great he did a good job i'm not going to argue that point um but that's a very technical job that deals with a lot of people's lives and things can happen really quickly on the runway but don't you think it's cute yeah it's cute it's great and don't you think that that guy That brought that kid in, made sure that the people were never in any danger and he was listening in the whole time. I think it could be very easy for the actual air traffic controller to get distracted on the cuteness of his kid and actually having to relay the message to him. I guess he probably was maybe in a place where he thought he was in control, where he could pull the emergency brake at any time and interrupt his kid, but still. Woodsy. Dude, I thought it was great.

30:24Because I'll tell you why. I was a little, before I heard the audio and heard the whole story, I was a little freaked out. But it's not like the kid was landing the planes. He was basically saying, okay, you're clear. His dad cleared him, right? And then said, okay, now into the mic, say, 403, you're clear for takeoff. Adios, amigos. Check blue 171, you're clear for takeoff, amigos. Now, had I heard him saying, had I heard him saying, You're on the right coordinate. You're going to need to pull up a little bit. You're going to need, you know, if he was landing planes, I'd have a problem with it. But clearing them for takeoff, I was like, money. I thought it was genius. It was genius. I thought it was genius. I don't know if it was genius, but it was cute. For a day, it's cute. Cute. Think about that little kid. Dad goes to work. He's so bummed. Every day he doesn't get to see Dad. And this day, Dad was like, you know what, son? Why don't you come on to work with me? You know what, son? Put these headphones on. Now, let me play devil's advocate with Lauren. If something had gone wrong, wouldn't we all be sitting here going, is that dude a freaking nut? Yeah, exactly. I mean, what kind of world are we in? Of course we would. Right? Wouldn't we? Of course. But it didn't. It didn't. I thought it was cute. Well, you're dealing with...

31:49Probably one of the most, I mean, this is just a fact that I'm pulling out of nowhere, but probably one of the most traveled airports in the country. Yeah. If not in the world. Yeah. It was on they.com. That was on they.com. She heard that. They said, I've heard. They've said that that's one of the most busy airports in the world, but it probably is. I just think that that dude probably knew what his kid was up to and he was telling him. I guarantee you, he said, here you go. Say this. When my brother was seven, he flew. with my dad. They put him on the controls and he flew a plane over the Long Island Sound. Really? That's a little scarier. Yeah. Flew a plane. Was at the controls with the steering thing. M1 John texted and said, I'm so okay with it. There is no way it could have gone wrong. Now that kid knows what he wants to do for a living. There's no way anything could have gone wrong. Well, I mean, I think the chance, the little kids there, they're listening. Dad's probably listening in with a pair of headphones on and he says, Now say this, son. Now say this. Blah, blah, blah. To me, it's along the same lines. It's like, you know, when you take your kid for a ride, he sits on your lap, drives a wheel, you know, but you're in full control kind of deal. You heard the pilots talking and the pilots were laughing. All right, adios, amigo. You know what I mean? If the pilots are cool with it, I'm cool with it. Wish I could bring my kid to work. Great job is what they said. Yeah. One thing that could have gone wrong, though, is, you know, if.

33:11They couldn't understand what the kid was saying, maybe. But I guess if they couldn't, they'd just be like, hey, bud, put your dad on the phone. Say again? Yeah. You know? It seems like they all responded perfectly. And I think it might have been one of those deals, too, where everything was all planned out anyway. This was the routine portion of the deal. I don't know. What do you think? 570-1949-M1-Redman. Mikey. What do you think? I went to work with my dad. He was a truck driver, but he never let me drive the truck. Maybe it's my dad, you know? Yeah, you know, listen. If your dad had put you on his lap and let you put your hands on the steering wheel, I wouldn't have a problem with that, you know? Now, if your dad put you in the seat and sat in the passenger seat and said, all right, son, third gear now, I'd have a problem with it. Take it away. Who hasn't sat in their parents' lap, you know? Of course. It's cool, but, you know, when it's other people's lives and they're driving, you know. Yeah. Seven down the freeway. It's a little different. I don't think that they were ever in any danger. I think dad was sitting there listening in and just telling him repeat after me. But people are upset. I like it. I hear you. Yep. 570-1949. You can also text 949mikey at gmail.com.

34:29Just so you know, this happened two weeks ago and the Federal Aviation Administration, obviously not happy, in fact, furious. But a lot of people are OK with it, too. Like the owner of LiveATC.net, which is the website where the recording of the air traffic communications is posted. They've spoken out and said this is nothing but a noble thing. A father took his son to work like, you know, his kid had a great day, got to see what dad does. Yeah. And nothing went wrong. Well, for those of you that think that Lauren's a party pooper. She ain't much of a party pooper being that the FAA is saying the same exact thing she was saying, going, what are you thinking? A lot of people are saying what Lauren's saying. Yeah. 570-1949 is the number. And you can text us to 949mikey at gmail.com. You want to do a little bit of this? Yes. Always. Woods. Woods. Woods. Woods on sports. He likes sports. What do you got? I love it. There's an interesting story out of Texas, Mike. The former Baylor football head coach, his name's Guy Morris, now coaches at a little school about 60 miles outside of Dallas called Texas A&M Commerce. Right. A couple of his players were arrested on drug charges, and it made the front page of the East Texan newspaper. Right. The other guys on the football team decide, hey, we're going to back our brothers, and we're going to go out and we're going to steal as many copies of this newspaper as we can find. Oh, my gosh. And so they do.

36:12And they stole about 2,000 copies. The loss is estimated at about $1,100. Interesting part of the story, though, is the football coach, Guy Morris, is okay with it. He's backing his players. He's saying, yeah, team bonding, that's how it goes. Needless to say, he's in some hot water. The president of the school cannot condone those actions, cannot condone theft. Right. You know, theft of property. Right. I'm really interested to see how this thing turns out if this dude keeps his job. That's a very, I mean, when you think about it, man, here's obviously a coach that's saying, if I go against my team, I'm going to lose my players. The other side, the flip side of it is maybe you gain some respect from your players because you pull them aside and you give them some discipline that is needed in this situation. I agree. That's dumb. Yeah, it is. Come on, guys. So notorious golfer John Daly. I guess he has a new reality show coming out, and there was a reporter for the Florida Times-Union. He published his disciplinary file from the PGA. As you know, he's had problems with alcohol, drugs, really just kind of the bad boy of the PGA Tour. For sure. So Daley goes to Twitter, and he posts the guy's phone number and email, and he asks all of his fans to get on and just inundate this guy. I got cut three.

37:33He left his cell number in his email in the article. So, you know, I figured he wanted people to know his cell number, so I let it out. Wow. He tweeted it. Wow. That's great. How mad would you be if that was your number? Oh, so apparently my beloved New York Yankees have rehired George Costanza to do their accounting for him because it turns out Jeter and the Yankees will each have to repay about $10,000 from their World Series share. There was an accounting error where three people were not paid. There's a couple of trainers that didn't get their share. And then also one unnamed player did not get his share. So the other guy's got to go into their checkbooks, which I think they're going to be fine. It's 10 grand, which is like a nickel to them. So they have to write a check and make that happen. So golfing legend Jack Nicklaus thinks that Tiger Woods will play in the Masters and also thinks he'll play. And something before that. So I thought that was pretty interesting. Nicholas doesn't think he can stay away from the golf course. And as it's been seen, Tiger has been working on his game the last few days. So moving on to baseball, Jake Peavy. Right. He's running mouth again. He wants Adrian Gonzalez, right? He wants him bat. Here's what he says about Adrian. He says he's a great player. And at times I think to myself, how could they not sign this guy? He's a hometown guy playing for his hometown team.

38:56And being the superstar player he is, at the same time, this is the same organization that let their Hall of Fame closer walk away. Talking about Trevor Hoffman. Of course. Here is Adrian Gonzalez, cut to, talking about PV's lobbying for him. Same thing I've been saying. I'm flattered that he thought highly of me to say that I could help his team. But then again, I have no control over any kind of trade, so I'm not even going to look into that. That was what I would call a very nervous throat clear. Yeah. And Adrian is, you can tell in this next cut, Mikey, and cut one, he's talking about how he has no control over it, but he's kind of getting tired of hearing the questions. Hey, are you going to be traded? Are you going to be traded? Cut one. I mean, the fact that they're asking me about him, yeah, because, you know, I'm not the guy to be asked about any kind of a trade. I don't have a no-trade clause, and I'm not going to. I asked for a trade, so I don't see the point in asking me. That question needs to be headed towards the GMs, not to the player. I don't want to lose Adrian Gonzalez. You just don't want to lose him here, dude. In the mass exodus of San Diego athletes that's been happening lately, it would be really tough for the Padres to even compete without him. He's money. It's brutal. Finally, in UFC, they have signed a new...

40:17Former boxer. Do you know who James Tony is? James Lights Out Tony? The dude's 41 now. And he had run some mouth before about Dana White and about the UFC. And he's saying that the UFC fighters are basically minor leaguers. Are you kidding? Yeah. And he said he's a professional. He's going to get in there. So Dana White signed him to a contract and he's going to get his shot. Are you kidding me? Nope. And he's like 6'1", 230 now, which is pretty much my size. I kind of feel bad. Well, what I'm trying to figure out is there's been a couple of instances recently that have made me think that UFC's feeling a little WWE. I feel the same way. I'm not sure if that's a purposeful thing or what the deal is, but I've been feeling that the last time. Seems like a stretch, you know, for them to have to go out and get a guy like James Lights Out, Tony. At any rate, man, we'll see how that turns out. And that is Woods on Sports. The new developments with the Chelsea King story are, I guess, with the suspect. Right, Sienna? Yeah, the suspect went to court yesterday, pleaded not guilty to the charges in a brief appearance. And, yeah, he's facing one count of murder with a special allegation of rape. And, obviously, prosecutors can seek the death penalty on this one. Is anybody surprised?

41:36Because I actually am. I'm surprised that he's pleading not guilty. I'm actually a little bit surprised that he went to court yesterday with murder charges when they haven't come out with the official result on whether or not the body that was found was Chelsea's. Right. Doesn't that seem a little weird? It does. It does. But then at the same time, I'm thinking, well, how did they get there so quick? How did they know how to get there so quick? Which led me to believe that maybe they worked a deal with him or he would tell them. where to find her right uh and that's why i'm surprised by the not guilty uh plea but who knows he spoke one word yesterday and that was yes in response to the judge questioning about whether he understood the upcoming dates in the trial and that's it uh yeah so he's gonna be back march 9th and the preliminary say it i know it's a little tough for a sec yeah it's march 18th And then there was also a woman that was attacked in Chula Vista yesterday. Yeah, this is pretty crazy. She was jogging in McCandless Park in Chula Vista last night, 23 years old. She was jogging at 8 p.m. when she was hit in the head from behind, knocked to the ground by two men that punched and kicked her in the head and the stomach for about a minute, and then they left.

42:49Do we know what the deal is, why this happened, what it was about? We don't know why this happened. She was able to call from help from her cell phone. She had her cell phone on her. She was taken to the hospital and treated for injuries, and she's expected to be fine. But it's very scary. I mean, and this is something that happens. all the time. Right. But because this just happened with Chelsea King, now, you know, these stories are coming out more and more and it just really shows you, you know, she's out running at McCandless Park in Julevist at 8 p.m. Now it gets dark at what, 5.30? Yeah. I mean, that's late to be out by yourself. Although, did you guys know that, just want to remind people that Daylight Savings is coming. Yeah. Yay. In fact, it starts in... Two weeks. It'll happen on the 14th. So what happens? We lose an hour? Yeah, we go. No, no, no. We gain an hour. Of sleep? No, I think we lose an hour. We lose an hour of sleep. Yeah. Rad. It happens on a Saturday. Still. You'll be okay. We spring forward. It's worth it. You get more daylight. Yeah. So when I'm getting up at 3. When I'm getting up at 4, it'll actually be 3 a.m. I get up at 3. It's going to be lighter. It'll actually be 2 a.m. Later. Yeah.

43:59It's not good. It's not good. The one that happens in the spring is not good. I don't like it. I don't either. I like it. We get more daylight. Yeah, I do too. I do like that part of it, but I don't like getting up and I'm like, oh, it just, it takes me half a year. Me too, dude. Perfect for me who loves to sleep. So I have an extra hour of daylight sleep. Do you guys know that Blockbuster still exists? Because I didn't until this news story this morning. I know the Blockbuster right by my house just closed, too. And I was like, oh, I guess all Blockbusters are closing. Well. I mean, with Netflix and with being able to, like, download movies onto your computer and all that kind of stuff, I'm just like, how do they still do it? I love Blockbuster still. Well, Blockbuster is still around, and they're bringing back late fees on rentals because, obviously, they need to do something. Starting this week, customers will be charged $5 for a five-day movie rental. And previously, customers were allowed to keep each rental for seven days. Woods, why do you like Blockbuster?

44:57I've always loved video stores and I like walking in and going, look at this and this massive selection that I get to actually see. Because if you like I downloaded a movie on my computer last night, but I knew exactly what movie I wanted. So I love being able to walk in and see, oh, look at that. That's that film I heard about, but I forgot about. But there's the box. Now I remember it. It's not a beating to you to have to get in your car and drive down to do something. I love the video store, dude. Four movies for 20 bucks and you grab the DVD. Like my dad and I are like movie nerds. We buy a ton of movies. If you could download milk, why would you ever go to the grocery store to buy it? You got to get in your car. Because you know what you want. Because you know what you want. You know you want milk. And it's nice to have it in your hands. Yeah. The only thing that I like about Blockbuster or any video store is the way that it smells when you open the door. I was going to say the same thing. Absolutely. Same exact thing. You know where you are the second you get there. Absolutely. are going to say that it's candy and stuff like that. There's something about the smell of the DVDs, right? Yeah. I always get red vines at Blockbuster. You do? Yes. See, but when we walk in there, what are we smelling? I don't know. It's the DVD cases, right? It's DVD, but it has like a hint of popcorn. Candy and carpet.

46:15DVDs. I love it. Carpet. Carpet. Not a lot of stores have carpet anymore. I know. That's true, too. And later on in the show, we're going to be telling you what we thought of the movie that we went and saw yesterday, Sherlock Holmes. So we'll be telling you about that. Jay picked Sherlock Holmes. That's what we went and saw. But anyway, Blockbuster bringing back the late fees. Want to know what the most affordable suburbs in America are right now in 2010? Any guesses? Encinitas. No. No, sir. Nowhere in San Diego. No way. Perfect. I would say it's got to be places nobody wants to live. Probably a lot of places that Hoyle lived. Yeah. Every place that I've ever lived is appreciated in value because of the radio stations. That was a joke. Thank you. Thank you. That was good, Hoyle.

47:08Thank you, Hoyle. I appreciate it. No problem, Hoyle. You talking to yourself? What's happening over there? That's funny. You're supposed to hit the... Oh. Thank you. Patting yourself on the back? Yeah, sometimes that's funny. So what happened? Give me a place. Give me one place that's good. Fishers, Indiana. Oh, dude. Hoyle's for sure lived there. I ain't never lived in Fishers. What about... Y'all don't look at the camera. Just keep talking. Okay. You don't have to... See, that's the thing I've got to coach on. When you address me, I'm going to say, look at the camera. Or no, I'm going to say, don't look at the camera. It's the same thing. If you say, ho, and I'm trying to sit back here in the background, it's just like looking at the camera. So I'll instruct you, if I feel that it's taken away, I'll say, don't look at the camera. All right. Okay. What about Papillon, Nebraska? Papillon. Really? Mm-hmm. Right by Omaha. Do they give prices, like what the average cost for a house? $70. Yeah, no kidding. Probably. You can buy the house for $70. Population there is $16,000. The median family income, $92,000. Medium home price, $145,000. Unemployment rate, 4.5%. And violent crime index, 13%. Now, this is based on, you know, cost of living, unemployment.

48:26Even the school district, they were saying, you know, if there's good schools nearby, crime rates, all of that. I don't want to live in Papillon, Nebraska. Absolutely not. Forget it. I would want to live in Mililani Town, Hawaii. For sure. Right by Honolulu. That's a good one on there. Yeah. Huntersville, North Carolina. Did you guys see, I thought I saw, I thought I saw Neil Diamond in his black sequined cape walking by the studio door. Yeah, he's in the building. So he may be in the building this morning. We may be talking to him. Do you think... Now, I don't watch American Idol. I know it's like the number one show in the country. I don't watch it. You watch it, Sienna? I love it, but I haven't been watching it recently due to all the craziness happening in my life. Right. I'm going to get back on because they're in the top... I think they're at the top 20 now. A lot of people don't like it because it's just glorified karaoke. You know, it's just like watching karaoke. Stop snoring Woods. Puts Woods to sleep. But there's a reason that it's popular. The reason that I think that American Idol is popular is because I think it's built into all of us to want to judge. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. It's built into us. And so when they come on, it's fun for us to say, boy, that's really a pitchy dog. Or that's really.

49:48really fantastic. And then you get behind someone, you pick a horse, you get to know their personalities. That's why the show works the way that it does. It also is having this major effect on record sales. That's why you're getting big name artists that are actually going on this stupid show and talking about their stuff because they sell a gajillion records. It's not a stupid show. Let me tell you something. It ain't a stupid show. You don't want to know why it's not? When we come back, I'm going to tell you. The effect that this show was able to have within a 24-hour period on our culture. Within 24 hours. Statistical data. We'll tell you about it next. Mikey Show, FM 94.9. For over 80 years, USAA has served the financial needs of our soldiers, veterans, and their families. No matter where you are, you can handle your finances anytime with our secure online banking. From free ATMs nationwide. To mortgages and cash bonuses when buying and selling your home through USAA's real estate program, USAA Bank provides a full financial suite of banking services. And if you qualify, you can even deposit a check using an iPhone or computer scanner. You've given a lot for your country. Making it convenient to manage your finances is the least we can do for you. If you have ever honorably served, let us serve you. Start by opening a free checking account today. Visit USAA.com.

51:40USAA does not charge a fee for the first 10 ATM withdrawals and refunds up to $15 in other banks' ATM usage fees each month. Eligibility restrictions apply. Real estate program provided by USAA Relocation Services Incorporated and is not available in all states. iPhone is a trademark of Apple Incorporated. Bank products provided by USAA Federal Savings Bank and Equal Housing Lender. Member FDIC. The clock is ticking down on the Cox 7-Day Sale. Don't miss out on our lowest prices of the year. Get both Cox Digital Cable and Cox High Speed Internet for less than $29 a month for three months. That's a savings of 50%. Enjoy free HD programming with Cox Digital Cable and faster internet speeds with Cox High Speed Internet. Call now and you'll also get free DVR service and nine channels of HBO free for three months. It's the entertainment stimulus package that works for you. Save 50% on Cox Digital Cable and Cox High Speed Internet. Get them both for less than $29 a month for three months. Plus add DVR service and HBO free for three months. That's right, free.

52:43Order today. Have it tomorrow with self-activation. Call 866-978-2080 or visit Cox.com. Don't miss out on our lowest prices of the year with the Cox 7-Day Sale. Hurry, sale ends Sunday. Offer expires March 7th. Excludes required equipment, rental, and other fees. Regular rates apply after three months. Some restrictions apply. Ovation customers tell their stories best. Would a bazillion thanks be enough? I'm in love. Ovation has delivered the results as advertised. The texture of my hair has changed for the best. I won't use anything else on my For real results guaranteed. Ovation works. Stop dry, brittle, damaged hair. Grow thicker, stronger, longer hair. Faster. Guaranteed with Ovation Cell Therapy. I had extensions that completely ruined my hair. But with Ovation, the breakage stopped and the hair is shiny and healthier than ever. Everyone asks and I'm happy to tell them, Ovation, Ovation, Ovation. For healthier hair, log on to OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout for a special discount. That's OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout. Ovation works.

54:00You're a rat in a maze. You'll never leave this island. Critics and audiences everywhere are blown away by the mind-bending twist of Shutter Island. Whatever the hell's going on here, it's bad. From director Martin Scorsese. Seen any walking nightmares lately. Leonardo DiCaprio. I'm gonna get the proof and I'm gonna blow the lid off this place. Shutter Island will keep you guessing to the very end. Who knows about this? Everyone. Shutter Island. Rated R. No one under 17 admitted without parent. Now playing. They say good things come in threes. Well, whoever they are, they're right. Because, one, Navy Federal mortgage rates are at all-time lows. And, two, a Navy Federal mortgage means no hassles. And, three, 100% financing is now available. So, that's a low-rate mortgage, Navy Federal service, available 100% financing, and, oh, yeah, a homebuyer tax credit up to $8,000. Oh, wait, that's four. Oh, well, they also say the more the merrier. To get started, apply today at NavyFederal.org. Equal housing lender.

55:03Tickets available at lightnation.com. This report brought to you by Toyota Motor Sales USA. Your Toyota dealer is committed to your satisfaction. They've extended their hours and added associates to take care of your service needs. They'll answer questions and address your concerns. 94 eastbound at the 15 in accident. This is where that car chase ended and the police are on the right shoulder with the abandoned car. Looks like the suspect's still on foot somewhere. They've called a tow truck. CHP is shutting down eastbound and westbound 94 to the southbound 15 connector trying to look for this guy. Also, Olive Hill Road at the 76. We've got fallen trees of pine trees across the entire lanes. Be careful as you approach there. And the 5 southbound, the ramp to Pershing Drive, an accident, a bunch of collisions on the blind curve. It's off of this ramp. Everybody's over on the right shoulder, but traffic is really backed up on the freeway. This report is brought to you by AutoZone. Come into AutoZone. You can pick up everything you need for your complete brake job, like long-lasting Duralast brake pads, components, and advice to do the right job. Get to AutoZone today. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9.

56:14San Diego, a Lincoln Financial media station. The new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Called music with a K. So American Idol, love it or hate it, it's having an effect. And here's what I'm talking about. So last night, this girl goes on American Idol and she sings a song by Coldplay. It's called The Scientist. You're familiar with it, right? My band used to do it. Used to do The Scientist? Yes. So she, kind of in the same vein, she decides this is what she's going to sing last night. Is this bad? I'm nervous. I'm already... I'm nervous? Well, already I'm listening to it, and it's not Coldplay, so I'm already, like, it's not what I'm used to. Right. So I'm already uncomfortable. Weird. Wow. That sounds pretty. Amazing.

58:12Awesome. You guys all like it? Yeah, it's a great voice. It's not what I'm used to, so I feel like I'm sleeping in someone else's bed. Stop. I want Papa Bear bed. I thought you liked cover songs. I do, but it's really different from what I'm used to. That's the best kind of cover song. Yeah, when they change it up. It's not fun if they do it the exact same way. It's really, really messing with my head that it's a girl singing to and it's not a guy. that's really messing with my head because it's different and it's a girl singing it. Same thing if it's a guy singing a girl. If a guy sings an Alanis Morissette song, I'm like, don't. We played a clip earlier when the season first started of a guy singing Paula Abdul straight up. That was pretty cool. That was pretty cool. Dang it, you're right. Gosh, dude. You like it? I'm getting goosebumps. Are you kidding me? I'm not kidding. She's got that really... Kind of throaty, silky, smoky. Oh, I love it. Well, let me tell you, dude. You're apparently right. Because today, the number one downloaded alternative song on iTunes is The Scientist. Wow. How weird is that? And you know that's why. Oh, there's no question. There's no question that's why. There was a dude last year that did Jeff Buckley's Hallelujah, which is probably top three of my favorite songs of all time.

59:44And everybody has covered it since. I mean, it's every person like Katie Lang covered. Hallelujah. You know what I mean? Like it's gone. It's run the gamut. And it probably stems back to that show. Jeff Buckley was really big favorite of mine when he was my favorite. Do you know if that girl who just sang that was has blonde like dreads? I think so. Yeah, she is a big favorite. She's she sounds incredible. She has a little bit of an underdog story, I think. She has a little kid, too. And she's just, like, doing everything for her son, and it's really cute. So you're down with it. I'm in. I'm 100% out. Mike, get out of here. I'm so sorry. I apologize. That's incredible. Well, yeah. I'm sorry. Dude, that's good, too. Things are allowed to be different, you know? You ain't supposed to hit it unless it's funny. It's funny that Mikey doesn't like that song. I don't like it. No, Mikey, you speak for yourself. I'm trying to help you. I'm saying what I'm saying, Hoyle. Hoyle. What I'm saying, Hoyle, Hoyle's our new station manager, is that it is very different from this. Not that different. You mashing it up over there, DJ? DJ Michael Shannon in the house. You're driving me nuts. Stop it. No way.

1:01:37You're crazy. I think it's awesome. Certain ones, I think it's tough to do. Can I ask you all a question? What's that? Who's the guy sleeping under the console over there? That's Dave Matthews. You'll get used to him. What's Dave Matthews? He's a singer. You never heard of Dave Matthews? I haven't, no. Oh, he's a big deal, famous. Central and Western? Not country and western, no. What kind of music does he sing? I don't know. What kind of music does Dave make? Dave, why don't you speak for yourself? Huh? Get out from under there. You're being asked a question. Good morning, Mikey Show. Hi. I'm tired, man. I got wasted last night. Are you a geisha girl? Why do you ask, man? And who the hell are you? My name is Hall. Well, why are you in my space? Well, I'm trying to find your paradox. The space between. Trying to find you a pair of Dockers. Everyone has to wear Dockers in here, Dave. That's Hoyle's rule. And I'm thinking about instituting the Steinbrenner rule, which means you shave that beard and mustache off. Nah, man. Who is this guy, man? He's our station manager. You smell like Willie Nelson's beard. That was perfect timing. Thank you. I'm just trying to sleep. I'm tired. I got wasted last night. What'd you do? Went out with Jay. Oh, Jay.

1:02:58Yeah. Are you talking about the producer in the next room? Yeah, man. The two-year one out? Yeah. Let me tell you something. I think I know who you are now. I've heard you on the show when I was listening on the internet in Shreveport. That ain't a joke, son. Now, when I was listening to you, I didn't recognize any of your music, but I do think you have a great voice. Man, I probably sold 100 million records, man. Wow. At least. Well, since we're talking about our resume, did I tell you what I did with Booger and Prescott when I was in Mobile? No. What? I made them number one, two books in a row before I was fired. That ain't a joke. That's great, man. I'll call the newspaper on that one. I like your voice and I like what you do with the guitar. So can we do a song together? Oh, please. You know any Chet Atkins? No. Never heard of him. Oh, for goodness sake. Chet Atkins. This is Chet Atkins. I can probably figure it out. You ain't never heard this? Nah, man, that ain't my style. I was talking to the program director here at FM 94.9, Garrett. Mike, do you mind if I talk on the microphone? Actually, I do. All right. Man, somebody likes to stick his beak in. Listen, I was talking to Garrett, and I told Garrett, listen, I got rock and roll under my fingernails and everything, but I think every once in a while it wouldn't hurt to mix in a Chet Atkins song. You can try it, Dave. No, man, I've never heard of it. Do you know any country and western?

1:04:25Maybe. Give me some people. You know Charlie Daniels, man? Nope. Johnny Cash? Nope. You don't know Johnny Cash? George Strait. Never heard of him. Loretta Lynn? Nope. Willie Nelson? Nope. Hank Williams? Nope. Waylon Jennings? Nope. Tim McGraw? Nope. George Jones? No. You don't know any of these? I know Poison. You're probably a big Poison fan. It's not really country. Yeah, it's not country. It doesn't get much more country than this. Brush your teeth, Dave. Is this every rose has its thorn? I'm going to sing along. Yeah, please do. Here we go. I'm going to sing along. Wow. Just like every night has its thorn.

1:05:42Because I'm a baritone, I don't sound like it with my speaking voice, but when I sing. You did pretty good. You're like Mariah Carey. It's different when I sing, people tell me. It's really different. Yeah, because when you talk, you have a pretty high-pitched voice. Yeah, but people compliment me a lot when I go into the... That's my singing voice. Wow. That's impressive. Wow, man. Can I go back to sleep now? Can you guys keep it down? No, Dave. Y'all, let him go back to sleep. Y'all, let him go back to sleep. Bye. Don't let us bother you here. That's what got Mikey into trouble in the first place. I think we get that. Poor kid. Take a shower. Get off the microphone. Seriously, dude. Sorry about that. He just shoved you out of the way, Mike. Yeah. 570.

1:06:431-949-9 is our number. 949mikey at gmail.com if you want to give us a call. Some other stuff going on. First of all, we're going to be telling you about the movie in just a little bit. Last night, Lauren had a little dinner with her boyfriend, Matt. Whole wheat pasta. And a big salad. Very domestic. And she's brought in a new flavor of... Kombucha. It's pretty good. It was better than I was expecting. I wish you guys could see the color. It is kombucha multigreen. And in addition to its regular ingredients, it's got mountain blue-green algae. You know, if you mix that with oil, it's a really great salad dressing. Pesto. You make pesto.

1:07:38Liquid pesto. It's a really wonderful pesto. Without any of its delicious flavoring. Yeah. We made a lot of people curious talking about how Lauren drinks the kombucha. And so people went out and tried it and vomited. Like, we got weed. Like, people are like, why don't you tell us that, you know, like, and I'm like, hey, listen, she drinks it. That's the stuff that she likes to drink. Prove it. I want to see one of these emails. I saved them all in a file called People Affected by Kombucha. You know what it's also good for? What? If you want to attract fish, just pour it right into the water. I caught like 30 fish the other day. It'll also clean a carburetor if you stick it in a big bucket and you pour that in there. But that's a new flavor that you got? Yeah. So last night... Flavor is used loosely. But I guess, so I'm learning all about Lauren's different things that she does before she goes to sleep. Did you know that her and her boyfriend, Matt, take a nightly tea together? I said a nightly tea. Be careful, Maggie. Don't start saying things that are defensive on the radio. Get it, dude. Can we do our show? And I said tea. They take a nightly tea together.

1:08:53Sorry, that's all right. It's all right, Woods. You don't have to repeat what I thought they said. Tea, tea, tea, tea, tea. Sorry about that. I apologize. All right, Git. Don't look at the camera. Can you just let us continue our show, Hoya? Don't look at the camera, y'all. Git. So what is the nightly tea? What is this? What do you do? We have decaffeinated tea. Matt usually has a sleepy time, and I have a pomegranate white tea. Really? And you do this each night. You do this. Yeah. You guys mix it up at all? Not really. Like, does he go in and go, honey, are you feeling cinnamon dream or are you feeling pomegranate lift? During Christmas time, we had some cinnamon apple. Yeah. Thanks. I would have never, like, I probably would have never thought that you guys would be into that kind nightly tea. Somebody's on the line right now that tried kombucha because of Lauren. M1 Adam, are you there? I'm here. What did you think? Yeah, so I'm the guy who spilled that stuff all over my pants. Yeah. Yeah. Better than drinking it, dude. What happened? Yeah, that was a better use. Well, because I was up all night trying to figure out if my front teeth had melted from letting that stuff out. It's really good for your digestion, though, so I'm sure it really cleaned you out. Oh, I'm sure it cleans a lot of things, probably oil, stains. Yeah.

1:10:21Don't you feel great, though, Adam? Yeah, I felt great. My teeth were definitely white afterwards. There was some biological activity happening, that's for sure. That's right. I don't know how you drink that stuff, honestly. I was bamboozled into buying it because I like the Green Machine stuff from Costco. That's what I drank this morning. Oh, sweet Green Machine. You know these guys are tripping. I don't know what they're talking about. Is that what you thought you were getting? You thought you were getting something that was like Green Machine? Yeah. Not so much. Not so much. No, it's like green vomit. I am going to, for ratings, I'm going to drink some. Yes! I tried to get Woods too just now. I was like, drink it. I'll get you a cup. I'm on my way. Really? This is not the best representation. Oh my gosh, I'm going to die. He's going to do it. This is not the best representation. I feel right now like I'm going to join the polar bear club. What is the polar bear club? Those old guys that get into the water in Alaska. I did that. You did? I told you about this. I jumped in with the iceberg. Oh, that's crazy. Just to say you did it. So I understand why you want to take a shot of kombucha. Okay, okay. Woods just filled the cup to the top. What are you, making a bowl of cereal? Okay, but this is not, like I said, this is even a little bit out of my element. Down the hatch. That is double the amount of a shot normally. You don't have to drink the whole thing. Turn the light on.

1:11:48Why? Because I'm going to take a picture of it and put it on the intranet. There you go. The World Wide Web. I want it to be on the World Wide Web. Mikey, I actually mainlined kombucha. I mainlined it. You shouldn't do that. It'll hurt you. I mainlined it. Man, I was messed up for days. Dave, really? Days and days. I wouldn't do that, Dave. Mikey just got his camera out of his murse. His man purse. Got a little cover-up in there, too. I know. That's in my bag. You know that? Yeah, we know that. It looks like I'm taking a picture for the TV show Dirty Job. It is dark, dark green. Green. Ew. Filthy. Looks like number three. With floaters in there. Stop saying that. Number three. Now you're really not going to be able to drink it. Enjoy that shot. All right, dude. I got a chaser for you. I need a chaser. You don't like Gatorade now? Do you want some trail mix? I'll take motor oil. I'll take 10W40. Chaser. Chase it down. Are you good? What are you going to drink? I got another one. Because there's no way you can share that. Well, you're not going to. Yeah, you're not going to drink that whole thing because you said Gatorade tastes like salt water. It does. It tastes like it tastes like somebody's sweat. Yellow Gatorade kind of does. All right. So he's got green kombucha and he's got yellow Gatorade to chase it with, which he hates. It's kombucha. I said kombucha. I need a drum roll. Kombucha. Oh, he drank it. Oh, God.

1:13:21Oh, no. He was dazed and confused. His hands went up like, what's happening? What's happening? He's dying. Now his hand is on his forehead, and he's bent over the laptop, hoping, praying that he won't throw up. He's going to yak. Is it awful? Your face went pale. Is it awful? I need to talk to my shrink. Is it awful? It's... He's leaning back. Let me tell you what's so weird about it. It almost had a Gatorade feel to it. Really? Stop it. Don't insult Gatorade. Finish it. Finish it. This is sweeter than others. Finish it. He drank it. He doesn't need to finish it. Finish it. Oh. Come on, Sally. Oh. Oh. Down the hatch. I'm going to down the whole thing. You are? Do you want some trail mix? See, you like it. Mikey likes it. I want to finish the stunt. Okay, he's doing it. Oh. Oh, he's slaying it. Wow. It looks like he just breathed fire. His hand is on his stomach. Oh, my stomach is rejecting it. My stomach is rejecting it. My stomach is rejecting it. Think happy thoughts. Please vomit. Think happy thoughts. He's just added seven years to your life. Oh, he almost spit up the Gatorade. Please vomit. I may have added seven years to my life, but my day just left my body. My day just left my body. You know why that's not important? Because there's seven years at the end. Oh, no.

1:14:41Now explain to me what it tastes like. I will. Salty? It is a little salty. To me, it has a slight salty flavor. It doesn't have necessarily, it doesn't taste what it smells like because it smells like a disposable douche. I'm being clinical. This is a smelly one. I'm being clinical. I'm not being, you know, making a joke. I really smelled it. His woods went to smell it and his nose touched the rim of the bottle. It's so filthy. It smells so filthy. Look at his eyes. They're watering. His eyes are watering. It tastes like ground up ham sandwich. It smells like ground up ham sandwich. M1 Mona Lisa. Are you there? Go ahead. Go ahead. Hey, I've been drinking that stuff for years. Yes. It totally cleans you out. It really does clean you out. If you're not used to it, if you drink a whole one, it's a great detoxifier. The guy that invented it, his mom, was dying of cancer. And she started drinking it for like a year. And through other treatments and stuff, she ended up getting rid of her cancer. So it's awesome. But it tastes so bad at first.

1:16:02Like after eight years? Yeah. What do you mean by a while? Once you burn all your taste buds out of your mouth. Dude, you can make whatever kind of love story out of that you want. That is the most. I don't care. I don't care. Mikey, that wasn't the best representation. I almost vomited. That was the closest I've been to vomiting on this show. You did. I did. Your reaction was so genuine. His nose like slowly lowered into it. I would wipe your bottle if I were you because his nostril touched it. I got lightheaded. It's foul. You smell your hands up in the air afterwards. It smells like asparagus urine. I can't imagine that you just drank that. He smelled my moccasin on the air. That's a gnarly guy. Deep breath. I'm going to put that picture on the Mikey Show Facebook page. Brilliant. There's a fan page for the Mikey Show on Facebook. Just type in the Mikey Show, and we'll put it on there. Our phone number here is 570-1949, and you can text us 949mikey at gmail.com. What is this? What is this? Cubby on the golf course. What happened? Somebody...

1:17:30Where can you find this, by the way? Jay, where can we find that? I'll put it on the Facebook page. Brilliant. You ever see Dorf on golf? Yeah, it's a picture of me. As Dorf. As Dorf, the golfer. Tim Conway was a comedian. He did this thing called Dorf on golf where it was basically just his torso. But where his, I mean, it was really, really short. He was like Mikey short. You know what I mean? So he used to do this bit. Really, really short, you know, like Mikey Short. Like Mikey Short. So you used to do Dorf on golf. There are other kinds of short, too. I know, Chatto. To give us a break, all right? I know. Not that big a deal. It's okay. So there is a email that we just got. What is kombucha tea? What are the health benefits of kombucha tea? Somebody forwarded this along to us. Long popular in other countries. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I would imagine. So is dog. Bro. Okay. I ain't eating that. Where they have nothing else to eat or drink. Should I read what the bottle says? Sure. Okay. Kombucha supports digestion, metabolism, immune system, appetite control, weight control, liver function, body alkalinity, anti-aging, cell integrity, healthy skin and hair. My cells have plenty of integrity. I don't need any more. You know why it promotes weight loss? Yes. Because you vomit every time you drink it.

1:18:52I'll tell you from personal experience, it does not promote weight control. Oh, man. That is syrup of EpiCab. It says that it is gaining popularity in the U.S., although frequently referred to as a mushroom, which it resembles. Mushroom juice. I don't want to drink any mushrooms. It's mushroom juice. Kombucha is not a mushroom. Are you ready for this? From the article, quote, It's a colony of bacteria. Perfect. Yum. Yeah. And yeast. Yeah. I am immediately thinking infection. Me too. Kombucha tea. So did everyone in the world. Why do you guys think probiotics are? I don't know what that is. Kombucha tea is made. I eat bacon. By adding the colony. Sausage. By adding the colony to sugar and black or green tea and allowing the mix. Again, I quote. To fester.

1:19:53To ferment. The resulting liquid contains vinegar, B vitamins, and a number of other chemical compounds. It is commonly prepared by taking a starter sample from an existing culture and growing. That's right. That liquid was grown and growing a new colony. In a, quote, fresh jar. Unbelievable. You guys grow up. Lauren, I've had barnacles that tasted better than that, dude. 570-1949 is the number. I ain't hitting that thing right. I know. That's what she said, by the way. That's what she said. You waited too long. You waited too long. Woods stole the wine. You waited too long. Don't yell at me. Wood stole the horn. We have somebody on the line that drinks it. M1 Chris. Hey, Mikey. How you doing? Good. Listen, actually, there's another product that you can get that won't be so obnoxious, and it comes in one of those capsule forms. Let me guess. Kibbles and bits. It's actually climate technology. You know, pond scum, if you will.

1:21:19It's one of the two food sources that you can get on the planet that have all of the essential fatty acids, all of the essential amino acids, plus the right balance of trace elements and minerals. What about bacon? Bacon has all that. Yeah, yeah. I'd rather have bacon. Yeah, yeah. Okay, well, I'm a microbiologist. I don't think so. Yes. Bottom line was when I started taking it, after about a month, what I found out was that I could no longer eat hamburger or chicken. If I'd eat those, I'd instantly throw up. Are you kidding me? So you started drinking that stuff? After drinking the Kambucha? He was taking pills. The pills. This is blue-green algae in the form of a capsule. It don't have the obnoxious taste. You take it as a capsule, and it dissolves in your stomach. So now you can't eat beef or chicken? No, I couldn't eat chicken or hamburger. I could eat beef. Well, hamburger is beef. Hamburger. We shouldn't tell him. Beef. You ever been to a hamburger plant? No, it's handled differently than beef. Okay. I don't want to talk about this. All kinds of parasites in here. All right. Well, thank you for the call. That was certainly the most fun I've had in 20 minutes. This is, I know, I'm grossed out. Do not burn my hamburger, dude. M1KBOD? Oh, Mikey. Yeah. Long time listener, by the way. I'm glad to hear you're back on the air. Thank you. My mom grows this. She grows her own. Nice. Weed? She grows her own kombucha.

1:22:40Okay, so you know how you talked about how you read, you know, you take a culture and you start a new batch? You open up her closet and she doesn't have clothes in there. She has batches of kombucha growing. You are kidding. Lauren's like, can I get the address right now? Can I get the address? Just grazing on a kombucha patch? Exactly. I want her to be my new kombucha dealer. I'm going to need an ounce of the green surprise. Because I bet that stuff's expensive. What, like $3 a bottle or something like that? Close to $4, yeah. Oh, brutal. You don't grow Gatorade, okay? And there's a reason. I brew my own Gatorade. That's right. I grew my own Gatorade for a while. Well, people in the sugar cane fields grow Gatorade. Really? Yeah. Don't you brew moonshine oil? I've never brewed moonshine on the record. On the record, okay. That needs to not be so close to the microphone. Don't look at the camera. Woods gets the horn and he squeezes it in the mic. Y'all, don't look at the camera. You get my donuts, please. What does it mean when I say don't look at the camera? We don't know. It means you're paying attention to me on the air. I'm supposed to be like a director. Well, then zip it. So why do you talk all the time? If I talk, you're just supposed to hear it like I'm a director. Take the direction, move in that direction. Thank you. But the audience can hear you.

1:24:03Booker and Prescott used to have the same problem, all right? Don't forget, they were number one for two books. Two books in a row. Amazing. Two books in a row. Can't see too well. Is that Scott Shannon over there? I don't know. Did you ever work with Scott Shannon back in Detroit, Hoyle? I don't know who Scott Shannon is. Apparently, dude, he's like, according to Garrett, who's our program director, he's like the... Legend. He's like the Tiger Woods of programming. You've never heard of him? I've never heard of him. Then I questioned the validity. Hoyle's not a program director. He's a station manager. Yeah, but anybody that's managed. I'm above the program director. I'm above him. Great. No, you're not. Above everybody. You're not, actually. Anybody that's managed a station, as many markets as he's worked in, he should know who Scott Shannon is. Oh, really? Yeah. How many stations have you managed pick up? None.

1:25:04That's right. Spit cop. Spit cop. That's right. I like that. You haven't managed one station. That's right. And I've managed a bunch of winning ones. Have you ever done the Incorporated? Have I ever told you about Booger and Prescott? Yeah, many times. Sorry about that. Well, I forgot that he mentioned it. That's the deal. M1 Jackie is on the line. Jackie, are you there? We lost Jackie. Jessica Simpson was on TV yesterday talking about John Mayer's Interview with Playboy? Yeah. Did you know that John Mayer and Jessica Simpson were dating? Oh, yeah. Yeah, and he said some stuff in Playboy that really upset her. So, we will tell you about it. Also, the San Diego Radio Broadcasters Association and FM 94.9 are going to observe a moment of silence at noon today for Chelsea King. Awesome. And that will be followed by music dedicated to Chelsea, which I think...

1:26:17I cannot even tell you how stand-up I think that is. That is so, so cool. On my page, Mikey, there's a petition to Congress. It's a free petition site, and I'm actually going to put that up on my Facebook page where you can enter your name and submit to sign a petition for harsher punishments for sex offenders. That's on your... It will be. It's on your Facebook? Yeah, it will be as soon as we get off the air. All right, so I'm going to do this Jessica Simpson thing, let you know what's going on with that. And... We're also going to be doing a little game of Would You Rather. Oh, yeah. The Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Wow, Cesar Gonzalez from Mama Testa Taqueria. Hey, Ryan from the Nervous Records. I wanted to stop in here after hearing Tim Piles talk about Mama Testa.

1:27:20Tell me about your chorizo. Oh, man, let me tell you about my chorizo. We make it fresh every day in the restaurant. We spice it up like only the way Mama knows. We don't use any of that greasy stuff we get at other places. Yeah, it's not greasy. Not greasy at all. My buddy Mark tried them. What did you think, Mark? I tried the El Pastor tacos. What's up with the pineapple? Largo! What are you doing here? Let me tell you about the El Pastor tacos, man. We marinate it for 24 hours, and then we grill it with grilled pineapple. Delicious, sweet, sour, spicy, all at the same time. Hey, Brian from the Nervous Records. What are you doing here hanging out with Mark? Hey Tim Piles, we're just eating some food. Really? Are you sure you're not cutting a commercial? No, man, we're just having a conversation, really. Yeah, are we supposed to be cutting a commercial? I'm a musician. I don't endorse things. Oh, this is awkward. Mama Testa Taqueria, Richmond and University in Hillcrest. Maybe I should write a jingle. Taylor Lovas! Taylor Lovas! Wait, Taylor Lovas! So what can I do for you today, sir? Yeah, I need a refrigerator, but I'm on a tight budget. Well, then what you want is this Fridger King refrigerator for the home food enthusiast. Just look at all these features. You got wide open access to your food items. Wait, that fridge has no door. Exactly, my friend. Why would you want a door getting between you and your food?

1:28:35Well, how does it stay cold? Cold is a relative term. I mean, it's colder than something hot, am I right? But hey, if you want to save money on something new, you can't expect to get everything you want. Settling for less is not smart. What is smart is getting more for your money at CarMax. Our guaranteed quality used cars are loaded with all the features you really want for the budget you really need. Just come into our store for written details for a five-day money-back guarantee. Don't sell it for less with a new car. Get everything you want, including a no-hackle price you can afford at CarMax. Because now more than ever, the smart choice is CarMax. The way car buying should be. Hey, Jack, sorry to bug you. Where do you usually get your car service? Same place I told you yesterday, Lisa. Toyota Carlsbad's New Parts and Service Facility. Thanks. Oh, hi, Molly. You bought a Toyota, right? Yeah, from Toyota Carlsbad. Where do you get it serviced? At Toyota Carlsbad's New Parts and Service Facility. Ooh, Billy, where... Where everyone else goes, Toyota Carlsbad's New Parts and Service Facility. Sorry, but getting your car service right the first time is a big deal. That's why we all go to Toyota Carlsbad's New Parts and Service Facility. Master trained service technicians. Genuine Toyota...

1:29:39parts. And it's the largest Toyota authorized service facility in San Diego County. Well, I guess my choice is clear. Good. Going back to work now. Shipping. This is Doug. Doug, where do you get your car? Stop it. Working. Toyota Carlsbad. Toyota owners now get a synthetic oil change starting at $49.95 plus tax and hazardous material fee. Text TOYOTASERVICE48696 for more specials. Visit Toyota Carlsbad New Parts and Service Center today, west of I-5 on Avenida Encinas, Carlsbad. See us online at toyotacarlsbad.com. The Internet. The new frontier. The way businesses do business. The old ways are out. If you want to stay alive, you can't just keep up with the Joneses. You have to run them down, preferably in an electric car. Today, it's all about the social networking. And nobody understands that better than Big Bear Mountain Resorts. That's why you can follow us on Twitter or Spacebook. Why, we're even on my face. In fact, I'm tooting right now. LOL. Yes, we're Awesome Sauce. We've even got an RSS feed. So you can get up-to-the-minute information on conditions, weather, midweek discounts, and special events at both Snow Summit and Bear Mountain.

1:30:52So come on, follow us on Friend Pile. We can play farm town. We're Big Bear Mountain Resorts. And we are made of wind. With the deep snowpack of 9 to 10 feet of natural snow this season, Summit and Bear will be open well into April. Stay in touch with Big Bear Mountain Resorts for the latest updates on snow, road, and weather conditions. After reading, after discussing, after searching, you realize that at this school you don't memorize the answers to questions, you ask them. The Rady School of Management at UC San Diego. Innovators under construction. Learn more at rady.ucsd.edu. This report is brought to you by REMAX Office. With low interest rates, down to earth prices, and the soon to expire tax credit, buying a home may never be more affordable. Visit REMAX.com. Nobody sells more real estate than REMAX. Outstanding agents, outstanding results. 15 northbound after the 52, an accident involving a bus, pickup truck, and an MTS bus. Both of them are on the right shoulder.

1:31:46Tow trucks are on their way as well. Coronado Bridge is pretty much tied up here to westbound of the 5. An accident, a car sideswiped a motorcycle rider. They do have injuries. Both of these guys on the left shoulder ambulance is on the scene. And watch out on the 78 coming through San Marcos eastbound before Twin Oaks Valley Road. Somebody dropped a whole bunch of aluminum roofing material. It's all in the number one lane. This report brought to you by Toyota Motor Sales USA. Your Toyota dealer is committed to your satisfaction. They've extended their hours, added associates to take care of your service needs. They'll answer your question. and address your concerns. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. This is Evan from surfline.com with your FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Fourth Thursday morning, brought to you by Gwek, Yerba Mate. Stay inside from the junky surf and have a nice glass of tea. Surf looking pretty jumbled and junky this morning with onshore wind out of the west-northwest. Our swell is a mix of increased local west-northwest windswell and decreasing west-northwest groundswell. Average breaks are seeing surf in the three to four to five-foot range, while top areas are seeing a foot overhead and maybe a little better. Conditions are pretty much poor across the board, though, with these high winds early this morning, and I really wouldn't expect it to get any better.

1:33:06For up to a minute surf reports and forecasts, go to surfline.com. And for everything you need in order to surf, check out one of South Coast surf shops, five locations, or online at southcoast.com. The surf report was brought to you by Goya Kiribamate. You can only be here three times daily, right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Now, more of the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. This is State of Emergency. She want me to do, I'm sorry. I'm back. Welcome back. It's the Mikey Show. You can call us if you want to. Our phone over here is 570-1949. And you can text us as well, 949mikey at gmail.com. So, Jessica Simpson, if you don't remember the mom shorts thing, let me explain. Some people may not know. Jessica Simpson had put some weight on.

1:34:43They're mom jeans. Mom jeans, pal. What did I say? Mom shorts. Mom shorts. I was looking at you going. You knew of the mom jeans, Woods? Yeah. That's right. There you go. The mom, the mom jeans. Genius. Yeah. Well, she, she wore these mom jeans and it caused a very big deal. I mean, they had like elastic around them. They were awful. They were cute. They were in style at the time. They were in style. The high jeans came back for a little bit. For a day. One day. And she wore them on that day. I felt bad for her. I did too. Anyway, so here's what Oprah said to her yesterday about it. What was your lowest point in the past couple of years? Probably the mom jeans situation. People talking about my weight for an entire year. People just couldn't stop talking about my weight fluctuating. This shows how out of it I am because I saw that and I thought, gee, I really like that belt. Leopard belt. It was a leopard belt? Uh-huh. So, yeah, they were these jeans that came up, you know, right under her boob. Yeah. That was the style. The empire waist jeans. Now, this I need some help on. I think I, you know, I was like, do I understand this correctly? And I actually had to Google image.

1:36:06But listen to this. Okay. Have you ever struggled with an eating disorder? No. I've tried every fad diet. Every diet there is, but never to the extent where it's unhealthy. Do you mind saying what size you are? I'm a size four. You're a size four. I fluctuate from four to six. So what were you in those jeans? Those jeans were a size four. The blue jeans? Hang on. I believe her. Yeah. I hear it. Okay. Now, I don't know anything. Like, I think I know something. And so I hear it and I'm like, because if I remember correctly, what is that noise? Is it Jay? Oh, yeah, it's Jay. It was not me. It was Jay. Woods looks very guilty. Woods just closed his computer and goes, oh, yeah, it was Jay. But anyway, so. Dude, come on, Jay. We're trying to do a show here, bro. Jeez. Not this time. I was watching. What happened? What did you see happen? Seriously oil. Spit cup was doing something on his Macintosh. I don't know what Macintosh. It's just called a Mac. A Macintosh. It's just called a Mac oil. His Apple computer laptop. That's right, his Macintosh. I saw him working on it over there. Don't look at the camera. Well, zip your lip, pal. So, I Google imaged women.

1:37:35Size four. Yeah. Guess what, Woods? What? She's right. I'm telling you, dude. Like, first of all, I had to Google image the pictures of Jessica Simpson where everybody was saying she was fat. It's a bad angle. It was a bad, it was bad jeans, bad angle. The jeans were awful. It's like when a photographer lays down and takes a picture up of somebody. This is what happens. Like they did to us a couple times and I have four chins. Where we look like the Redwood Forest. No, those jeans, like, girls like those jeans. Those are the type of things that, you know, girls like and guys do not like on girls. Like capri pants. Yeah. Why do women like them? Is there something different? They're cute. Marsha Brady, like, back then, like, that was the style and, you know, it was coming back. Throwback. So the idea was these are cute. Not to one man. Not to one dude. Yeah. Nope. Well, she's curvy. And a lot of the women that wear those in the 70s were like, I feel like they were kind of beanpole. Like that was, I don't know. Really? Yeah. She's curvy in a good way. She's foxy. I mean, there's no getting around. I've always thought she was really cute. But that just was not a good day for her. We all have them.

1:38:53We all have them. I thought it just was a bad picture. Is there a thing, such a thing as size zero? Yeah. For sure. There's double zero. What? Yeah. There's double D. That's different. Oh, it is? You... Well, you know what I'm doing. You know why I'm doing this. Stop doing it. You know why I'm doing this. To save the dolphins. Save the dolphins and the seagulls. Don't say the word. That you just said you're going to get us an FCC fine. Double D? That's right. I just said it again. I wouldn't say it anymore. I'm telling you, you're taking a chance with the Federal Communications Commission. I'll roll the dice on Double D. Don't talk about, don't talk about Hoobobs. Hoobobs? Hoobobs. Oh, Hoobobs. If you're going to refer to them, refer to them as Hoobobs. Hoobobs, and what was the other one? Hoobobs. Hoobobs. Is that what Booger and Twitch did? No, it ain't Booger. It ain't Booger and Twitch. It's Booger, and it was Booger and Prescott at the time. It's fine oil. He didn't mean it. He didn't mean to make you so upset. The so-called mom jeans? You were a size four in those jeans? And people are calling you fat in a size four? Those are a size four? They are. But I'm 5'3", you know. Your largest size has been what? A six.

1:40:24Jeez. Ay, ay, ay. That is not big at all. Let me just say that if you're wondering, guys, and you don't understand the size thing. A six is not big at all. Oprah would kill to be a four or a six. I thought a six was supposed to be perfect. There's no such thing. Yeah, I mean. Well, okay, let me phrase it this way. I thought a six was supposed to be ideal. Yeah, depends on what your height is, the way your body is. Yeah. Depends on also personal preference. A six is pretty in the middle. I mean, a six to an eight. Lauren, you're very thin. You're very fit. Or is it bad to ask a girl what size she wears? Yeah. It is? Yeah. What size are you? She's little. She's little. What size are you? It depends. It does look like she's wearing a pin. Especially when I wasn't the one that Mike said, Sienna, you're very fit. I'm a 34. Yeah, but it's different for a guy. 36. Yeah, man. 36, man. Women freak out, right? You know, it depends on the store, too. Like, I like to shop at, I was telling your wife, Rebecca, this, the story at Sienna's wedding. I like to go to, like, the black and white store and Banana Republic to get dresses because they run particularly big so I can fit into these tiny little sizes when I go there. Really? Yeah. Like, I need a two, please, or I need a zero. They're all different. Yeah.

1:41:48Like, I am a really small size in a dress because I have a small waist. Yeah. But, like, with pants, I have to wear bigger because I'm more curvy on the bottom, if you know what I mean. A little more curvy? Yeah, same here. My dress size is a lot different than pants, and, you know, it's... Don't get it. And it depends on the brand. Like, you know, if you go to a store like Forever 21 where it's meant for, like, petite, small, medium, large there. Yeah, Woods, let's go over to Forever 21. Seriously. After the show today. We'd be arrested, pal. Anyway, Jessica Simpson never was fat. I didn't think so either. All right, where's my would you rather? Let's get my would you rather stuff. We need to play the song. I love the song. We're giving you two choices, and both of them are bad. Would you rather step on a nail or get kicked in the nuts? Would you rather? It's right in front of me. Weird. It's like on top of your forehead. Mm-hmm. All right, are you ready? Here is your question. Would you rather be three feet tall or eight feet tall? Oh, dude. 570-1949. Would you rather be three feet tall or eight feet tall? Three. Why don't you answer the question, Mikey? I don't even know what that means. I don't even know what he's saying with that. I think he's saying...

1:43:21Yeah, you're there, man. You're there, all right. You're there. Because you're three feet tall. Ah, that what? Right? I'm three foot four. So would you rather be where you are now or eight feet tall? Where I am now, I am taller than three feet. Okay. I'm three foot four. That is way taller than three feet. Yeah, my bad. Please don't deny me the four inches. That's... I know it's what's coming. I know it's what's coming. Go get somebody a fan. I'm telling you right now. I would rather be three feet tall. Really? Give me eight feet. You can't get on planes, dude. I can dunk, dude. You ever dunk a basketball? It's going to be really hard. I'm sorry. It's going to be really difficult for you to get on a plane. So what? I can dunk. It's true. I can dunk. You can feed me the ball under the boards, and I can turn around and jam one down. Yeah, but... Isn't everything going to become an issue? If I'm three feet tall, I'm never getting a girl. That's not true. I mean... Ow! Oh, gosh! What just happened? Oh, no! Sorry. What did you just do? Oh, my God! What just happened? She just kicked her shin on something. She banged her knee on this little quarter, this...

1:44:56pointy little corner under the board. Yeah, you need to move down that-a-way. Did I just say that-a-way? Yeah, you did, Grandpa. 570-1949. Anyway. We are train wrecks. And M1 is a Mikey Show listener. You belong to the M1 Nation. M1 Hambo. Hey, Mikey. Which would you rather be? I would rather be three feet tall because A, have you seen Austin Powers? B, have you seen Jackass? And C, they're pretty much a walking punchline, right? Yeah? Well, wait a minute. Wait a minute. You mean the tall people? No, three feet tall people. So you would rather be three feet tall? Yes. That's crazy to me. There's plenty of people that are. I mean, so there are accommodations that seem to be more appropriate for that size than eight feet people. Like you're saying, planes, cars, stuff like that? High chairs, things of that nature. I've always wanted to be able to be like...

1:45:53picked up and, like, thrown around, you know? Whoa. Beetlejuice. Hello. I don't mean like that. Todd, did you hear that? I don't mean like that. Did you hear that? I don't mean like that. I just made it be fun. Todd, hope you're listening, pal. He probably is. We're going to take one more on it. M1 Laura. Laura, are you there? Yeah, I'm here. Go ahead. I'd rather be 8 feet tall. Why? Because I'm already a tall girl, and I don't like being short. How tall are you? I'm not super tall, but I'm, like, 5'9". That's tall for a girl. That's pretty tall. Yeah. Now, when you go out on dates with guys, do you have to wear flats? Sometimes I do, and it is a little bit of a fashion faux pas. I'm, like, taller, and I'm in my heels. It's a little annoying. Rock the heels, anyway. What are you wearing? I still rock the heels. Weird. Easy.

1:46:52I don't care. I'm like almost 5'8". I still bring my stripper heels. I don't care. Yeah. It's fun. Thank you for the call. Let's see. Would you rather forget who you were or who everyone else is? Me. Rather forget who you were? Yeah. Neither. You can't say neither. Gotta pick one. Because I would want to remember the people that I love, you know? But how do you know you love them if you don't know who you are? That is... Ah. Play-Doh. But... Spirit of the question. Socrates. Just call me Socrates. I thought you were talking about the stuff that comes in the little can, that kind of Play-Doh. No, Play-Doh. If you don't remember them, then you'll feel alone, you know? I think she's right. Yeah. But if you don't know who you are, you will also feel alone. But you're not alone. I wouldn't want to be alone. But people could remind you every day. Yeah, like you're like, I'm your mom. Like in that Drew Barrymore movie? Exactly, yeah.

1:47:5250 first dates. Yeah. Or like mementos sort of thing. Would you rather know it all or have it all? Know it. Know it. Have it. Woodsy? I already pretty much know it all. I guess I'd rather have it all. I mean, have you not seen the Woods of Wisdom on MikeyShow.com? Yeah, go to MikeyShow.com. You can ask the kid. We're going to be doing Woods of Wisdom tomorrow, I believe, Mikey. Sweet. Yep. Would you rather have a missing finger? Or an extra toe? Extra toe. Toe. Toe all the way. Because you can hide it. Yeah. Yeah. And a missing finger is going to be a problem. An extra toe? Yeah. So you walk a little to the right. I don't think neither one of them have to be a big problem. No. Depends on if the missing finger was a thumb. That makes things a little more complex. Or index. Would you rather only be able to whisper or only be able to shout? Whisper. I'd much rather whisper.

1:48:56It's funny. Much rather whisper. Whisper. Me too. For sure, right? You would drive people nuts if you could only shout. Absolutely. 570-1949. As I'm saying, you can be calling in about any of them. This one, for me, is an endless circle of misery trying to think of the answer. What? I can't wait. Would you rather not be able to use your phone or your email? Easy. That's easy for you? The easiest thing ever. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Now, you can't be doing this. Oh, I'll just check my email on my phone. You can't do that. I would ditch the email in a second. Me too. I need to hear people's voices. I need to be able to say, I'm on my way. Where are you? Woods. I would keep the phone. You would keep the phone? Keep the phone. Oh, my gosh. Why are you questioning it? Oh, it's not even like. Once I had to sit here and force myself to think about it, it's not even a question. Of course I keep the email. What? He's an emailer, though. Of course. He's a rabid emailer. What do you do? Like, how do you get by? What would you do? How would you survive? How would you live? Why don't you think back to yourself 10 years ago? I didn't have a cell phone. I've had email that long.

1:50:19Okay. How would you live? How would you not die? How would you be alive? How would you be alive? I mean, I remember back in college when you don't, like we talked about this, I think before, that we didn't have cell phones. And it was like, hey, dude, we're going out tonight. Be at my house at 8. Leave a note. Or you're done for that. We'll see you tomorrow. Because if you, we can't call you. We can't text you. I'm not going to call you from a pay phone because you don't have a cell phone either. I honestly wish it was still like that because then people would actually show up on time. No, they wouldn't. No, they wouldn't. Then you ditch them and you don't have to feel bad. Would you rather have x-ray vision or bionic hearing? Oh, dude. X-ray vision. X-ray. Any guy's going to say x-ray vision. Yeah, I'm going to say x-ray vision just because I don't want to hear stuff. No, it would drive me nuts if I could hear everything. It would make me crazy. Would love x-ray vision. M1 John, you would drop the phone or your email. I would definitely drop the phone over the email. Of course you would. Of course. Why? Because that's the correct answer. Stop it. Listen, phone, all you do is you talk to the person. You end up talking to the person. The email, you need that. Oh, you need the email. You definitely need the email because most of the time I don't really want to talk to the person anyway. I just want to get my information that they need and get going. Yeah.

1:51:47Thank you very much. I appreciate the phone call. Woodsy, you didn't get a burrito, did you? I didn't, dude. The girl that works, she's an intern, I guess, and she brought us delicious breakfast, but I don't really like burritos, you guys, so you guys can eat, and I guess I'll just watch. Susanna, you didn't get Woodsy a... You know, I got something special. Actually, I made something special. You made something for him? Yep. It's a breakfast polenta with berries and vanilla, and then there's a Parmesan and a souffle. What? What was that? A souffle? I couldn't understand a word. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Susanna, can you take out your retainer for a minute? Sorry, sorry. Take out your retainer. Oh, shit. Oh. Sorry, what I made was a breakfast polenta with berries and vanilla, and then there's a parmesan and chive egg souffle. Wow. Sounds amazing. That's what Woods is about to eat right now? You guys enjoy your burritos. It's really great. Made from scratch. It's really great. Thank you so much. You're welcome. You can put the retainer back in. Sorry, it was hard to understand. I would have liked one of those too, you know. I don't know why only Woods got one. Yeah, why did you make that for Woods, Susanna? You guys know why.

1:53:07And you brought us burritos. I'll show you why. What's that? This song. Woods, woods, woods, woods. Right. Woods on sports. This one? It's been in my head for days. Really? I'll let you sing along. Okay. Woods, woods, woods, woods. Woods, woods, woods. Woods on sports. Woods. Woods, Woods, Woods. Keep going. Woods, Woods. Woods on sports. It's hard to keep up, isn't it? Sheesh. Oh, my God. I just can't get through it. I laughed. Wait, Susanna. Wait, Susanna. Hang on a second. Hang on. Susanna. I couldn't. It was a little bit. There was a part of it that was hard to understand. So I'm going to have you take your retainer out, okay? Okay. And then I want you to sing it this time without the retainer. Woods, Woods, Woods, Woods. Woods, Woods, Woods. Woods on sports. Woods, Woods, Woods, Woods. She sounds like Nora Jones. Woods, Woods, Woods. Woods on sports. That was really good. That was really fantastic. Woods' breakfast is really delicious. So catchy. They're awesome. That was fantastic. Really great.

1:54:38Bye, honey. Bye, Susanna. Don't bother saying bye to us. She didn't say goodbye to me either. She just walked. She just said bye to Woods and left. Are you going to share that with us, Woods? Weird. No, absolutely not. Well, yeah, I mean, you got to lift that silver, you know, dome off the top of it. That is elaborate. Tao Cruz, number one downloaded song in the country right now on iTunes is this one. It's called Break Your Heart. Megan Fox. Has made it public how many people that she has slept with. Megan Fox. Amazing. Why would you do that? Why would I do Megan Fox? No, that's not. Oh, that's what you said. On FM 94.9. This is the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar. Next Saturday night, March 13th. It's going to be a good show at the House of Blues. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club are playing with the wigs.

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1:59:21of Shutter Island. Whatever the hell's going on here, it's bad. From director Martin Scorsese. I've seen any walking nightmares lately. Leonardo DiCaprio. I'm gonna get the proof and I'm gonna blow the lid off this place. Shutter Island will keep you guessing to the very end. Who knows about this? Everyone. Shutter Island. Witted R. No one under 17 admitted without parent. Now playing. Mama Testa Taqueria. Authentic Mexican food. Richmond and University in Hillcrest. If I can be Bobby Flay, I can surely blow your mind. Come in and let me put some Mexican in you. Dios mio, what have I done? This report brought to you by Saquon Casino. Hungry for a great meal and a great value? Every night between 5 and 10.30 at Saquon Casino. You can enjoy our choice of New York steak and Maine lobster tail dinner for only $20. Get away for the day at Saquon Casino. On the I-5 southbound after Miramar Way an accident, there's a car in the center to fire who's got a blown out tire. He was hit by another car that's going sideways in the number one lane. Of course, fire department's on the scene here. On the 5 northbound before Via De La Valle, watch out, big rod. It's a metal one.

2:00:32It's in the middle lane. And on the 5 northbound after the 52, an accident involving a bus, a pickup truck, and an MTS bus, both these guys are over on the right shoulder. This report, it is brought to you by the 2010 Census. The Census form arrives in mid-March. Just take 10 minutes to answer 10 simple questions and help your community get what it needs. Learn more at 2010census.gov. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego, Lincoln Financial Media Station, the new home. of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. I got an email to read to you here in a second. So why did Megan Fox make it public, Sienna? How many people she slept with? Because, you know, people just assume she's been with a lot. They do? So, yeah, she's a beautiful girl. I know one that she's been with. Who? You're looking at them. Oh, yeah, okay. You are looking at them. Okay. Never made any assumptions about Megan Fox and who she's having, sleeping with. I'm older than her. You are? By a year. I thought that she was older than me. She looks older than you. Yeah, I would have thought so. She's 23. Thank you, Lauren. Thank you. She told Harper's Bizarre Magazine, I've only been with two men in my life. Yeah. Only two. Her childhood sweetheart. So maybe she was, well, young. Right. And Brian Austin Green. And me. She names them.

2:02:40Well, that was her long-time boyfriend. Yeah, she's been with Ryan Ostergren for a long time. Okay. Everyone's scratching their head on that one. Yeah. I know. I think she has a tattoo with his name or something. Yep. What's really weird is it says David Silver. That's what's really strange about it. She said, I can never do it with someone that I don't love. The idea makes me sick. I've never even come close to having a one-night stand. The idea of waiting until she's married, out of the question. The idea of waiting until you're married. In today's culture. Out of the question. Although that's what I believe. I believe you should wait. Yeah. I didn't. Yeah. But if I had it to do all over again, I would. But that's, you know, our culture says don't do it. You got to live with somebody. You got to sleep with a bunch of people before you get married. That's the deal. I did get some looks on the wedding night, like, from my grandma's friends. Like, whoa. Really? I'm excited. I was like, yeah, okay. Yeah, I'm really looking forward to it. Sure. They're pulling you aside, giving you instructions. It's okay now. You're a woman. You're now married. You're now married. It's acceptable. I mean, in today's culture, that's crazy. I know. So listen to this. Tell me what you think. 570-1949 is the number. And you can also text us. 949mikey at gmail.com. Mikey, OMG. Last night, I made a major technology oops. There's a girl in our group of friends, Carolyn.

2:04:11That is overly obsessed. Oh, I feel bad. She put in parentheses, don't say Carolyn's name. Oh, no. Never mind. It's Shmarillion. It's Shmarillion. Shmarillion. This is what happens with Mikey. If you put something in front of him, he's going to read it. I'm Ron Burgundy. I'm Ron Burgundy. I am Ron Burgundy. I'm Ron Burgundy. I'm Ron Burgundy. Okay, it's out there. So her friend Shmarillion. That is overly obsessed with her new chihuahua. She says like literally it's all she talks about. So when I was on the phone with her last night. She told me how she's getting the chihuahua a platinum and diamond dog tag. After I got off the phone with her. I went to text my friend. I won't say the friend's name. About how ridiculous she was. So I texted her. Now that ugly dog has more bling than I do.

2:05:11Turns out I did not text Shmagan. I accidentally texted Shmarilyn. She immediately texted back, seriously, question mark, not cool, exclamation point. I feel like a total jerk and can't believe I made such a stupid mistake. I tried to call and apologize, and she wouldn't even pick up. Oh, get over it. What do I do here? Help Mikey show M1 tech dummy. She texted the wrong person. We've all done it. I know we have. Right? Yeah, for sure. We all have. Absolutely. You always text the person who you're talking badly about because that's the person that's on your mind. That's the person you're thinking of. So instead of, you know, instead of writing about that person, that's the name you type into your email. That's the name you type into your text. That's the name you type. And then you send this thing, which is the innate danger in talking smack. Yep. Yeah, that's true. 570.

2:06:13One ninety four nine. Have you ever done that? If you've ever done it, call us and tell us. And how bad was it? Lauren, have you done it? I've done that. Not to that degree, because I just don't talk badly about anyone. But no, gosh, my boyfriend, Matt, I don't know if he's listening right now. He did the ultimate tech faux pas. What? Well. I was living in Australia for a few months right before or right after Matt and I started dating. And I was gone for three months. We talked every single day and we Skyped and we emailed. So when I came back, he was so excited that I was back and happy to see me, whatever. Well, I had sent out an email because his sister's a musician and was in a contest. So I sent an email to everybody I knew. everybody i knew and i said please vote for her um you know her song is up on this website if you vote for her she can win this contest it was a national singer songwriter contest matt did a reply all and he thought that he was just replying he thought he was just replying to me and said he replied to every single person in my address book

2:07:22This included family members, old co-workers, friends. Whatever's coming. Whatever's coming. Whatever's coming. Whatever's coming. What did he say? He was like, you're so sweet. Like, thanks for doing that. Blah, blah, blah. I'm so glad that you're back. It's so nice to be able to actually see you, talk to you, and even lick your armpit if I wanted to. Oh, my. I was like, this doesn't sound that bad. It sounds really sweet. Stop, because it's creeping me out. He pulled an M1 Brock. Oh, actually. Why? What did M1 Brock? Remember M1 Brock called maybe last week and said he licked some girl's arm? Yeah, remember? He licked the girl's arm at church. Right, right. It's always a good move. He thought it was his girlfriend. He licked the wrong person's arm. Yeah. And Matt's just a clown, so I think he was just saying, like, now that you're here, I'll just go ahead and lick your armpit kind of thing. The response on that, like, no, and no one had met Matt. None of my family members. Nobody. Friends. I love this so much. Like, we had only been dating a little while before I left for three months out of the country. To this day, right? Oh, to this day. His nickname Armpit? Seriously. I can't believe my family, especially because they're such pranksters, didn't give them more of a hard time. Everyone had, like, something to say over email, but when they met them in person, nobody was like, hey, Armpit, how you doing? Oh, wow. I would have moved. Oh, yeah. I would have moved. I would have been living in Papillon, Nebraska right now. See, I thought it was going to, like, say something.

2:08:50really like descriptive and intimate about you guys. And then it would have been bad. But I think that that's funny. I would have been like, this guy's awesome. He has a sense of humor. Yeah. But still, if you're her dad. Yep. Yeah. If you're her dad. Oh, really? Lick my daughter. You're licking her armpit. Well, you know what? I'll bring some grapes. So I have a pit party. We're going to have a pit party. Let's have a pit party. You know what? I'll be a part of your pit crew. What do you think? I'll be in your pit crew. I love it. Yeah, buddy. Better armpit than. A lot of other things. Way better. The first email, because I, you know, I didn't, at this time, I didn't have a BlackBerry. I wasn't all, like, technified. So I went to go check my email, and in the order that they came in, I got, like, an OMG message from my friend Karen that was, like, your boyfriend, Matt, sounds like. Quite a. Yeah, quite a jokester. I guess he's really happy that you're back. So you're like, your heart's pounding. What did he write? What did he write? What did he write? I didn't even have a place to live at this point. And I'm at his house. I'm like, what did you say? And his, okay, his skin turned ghastly white. His eyes were like the size of golf balls. And then I grabbed him by the collar. I'm like, what did you say? What did you say? What did you say? So I started kind of cracking up. And he was like, oh, I thought you were going to break up with me on the spot.

2:10:07Well, that's not, I don't know. That's not cost, but break up. It's not a fireable offense. No, you don't get fired for that one. But we, yeah, we talked about what could have been said. Oh, yeah. Dude. And that would have, yeah. Can't wait till you get home and rub hot lotion all over your butt. That's right. You know, like just really foul. You're going to turn into a bad girl. Yeah. Bring the handcuffs and the butter over. Yeah, but the reply all button to this day, she is like terrified of the reply all button. So am I. I hate it. I hardly ever do it. I've done it. Sienna hates the reply all. I do. You guys all are like, we'll reply all all day. She's the only one that won't. Sienna will not, you know. That's awful. I giggle sometimes. Woods's are really unnecessary reply all's though. Weird that you say that. His are like, yeah. Awesome. You know, and it's like, dude, if you don't have anything to say, don't do anything at all. It's so funny. It's like when someone texts you back, okay. Okay. Or no, okay. Just okay. I think that's, I do that. I do too. It's respectful. Hey, you know what? It is respect. It means, you know what? Hey, I got your message. I got your message. I'm acknowledging you. I'm like, I don't, that doesn't deserve a text back. It's, it's. It's a waste of a text. Hon, you've never been in the business world.

2:11:24You've never been a businessman. No, that's not what it's about. You've never been a businessman. No, that's not what it's about. I would hope I'm never a businessman. You always appreciate the reply back. Hey, I got your message. I acknowledge it. Great. It's all good. That's not business to me. It's just respectful. I think you're supposed to be respectful and say, I'm acknowledging. Yes, I got it. Well, I can tell now I have enough text message report with Mikey that this morning you sent me a text message. And we had a couple back and forths, and then you're like, okay, you know, we'll settle that when we get into the station. And I wrote back, sweet. Yeah, unnecessary. See? Sweet, unnecessary. Sweet was unnecessary. Why was that unnecessary? Because I think it was kind of sarcastic. I knew you wanted a response, and I couldn't bring myself to type, okay. So I was like, I'm going to bring it up a notch. I always will type back the okay or cool. See, don't take it personally when I don't because I hardly, emails, text, if I don't have to, if you're not asking me a question, I won't respond. It's weak. Just assume it's okay. I'm going to throw Woods under the bus. Do it.

2:12:28He said Coolio. I did not. You did too. I did not. I will show it to you. I did not. You said Coolio. I did not. You did. I did not. I will search. Come along and ride on a fantastic slide. Slide, slide, slippity slide. I was like, I read it and I go, did Woods just hide back? Coolio? It was probably a mistake, dude. It was probably a mistake. Typo, yeah, sure. All my emails start with what, Mike? All my text messages. It says, Coolio with three exclamations and a wink face. What do all mine start with? I don't know. Come on. I don't. Everyone I send you, hey, pal. Hey, pal. That is true. Pal or pally. All right, will you guys teach me? Will you guys teach? Because I've now been shamed into ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. I do it all the time. You can do the LOLs if you're laughing out loud. I'm not going to. You can do the LOL if you're 14. That's when you can do that. I do LOL. If it's really funny, they get an LOL. Do not lol anybody. And you want to know something else? You want to know the worst part of Woods and Lauren's ha-ha-ha-ha-ha? Yeah. Is that they've now told me that ha-ha-ha is like if it's, you know,

2:13:45A sympathy laugh? Yeah, it's basically a sympathy. Ha, ha, ha, ha. And then if they give you a long ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Got it all wrong. The ha, ha is the obligatory. Yeah, that's the ha. Or the ha. Three ha's or more. Hilarious. My mom writes the ha, H-A. And you're like, you see it and you're like, oh, God. She didn't think that was very funny at all. Todd called me the other day and he's like, I just got an email and it said beat. BTW? By the way. Yes. He had no idea. I think he had been panicking for like an hour. Like, what is this person trying to tell me? I think this person, does this mean butt time with you? I don't even know. Why would they say that? That's probably what he was thinking. It means bacon tastes wonderful. Yes, it does. Bacon tastes wonderful. Let's see. This is M1 Yvette. Are you there? I'm here. Go ahead. Okay, so my best friend, her 13-year-old daughter was being such a brat, so I go to text my sister. You know, this little brat is being a brat, blah, blah, blah, and I accidentally text my best friend. This was three years ago, and she has not talked to me since that day. No. That's her kid. Wait. I know, but she's like a niece to me.

2:15:12And she was being really disrespectful to me. And I wouldn't defend my son if my son's being a brat to someone. Exactly. So what did the text say exactly? Yeah. Exactly. I mean, I can't remember exactly, but to the effect of, you know, she's being such a brat. I didn't say, like, being a little, you know. A little B. But it's the fact that. All I said was she's being such a brat, period. And I sent that to her. And it was her kid? Yeah, her kids. You know what? Listen, this is the way that I was raised. The way that I was raised is if anybody said that I was a brat, it was because I was a brat. Right. And so if anybody, like if my friend was babysitting my kid and said, Jake is being such a brat right now, I would text back immediately and be like, should I ground him? What do you want me to do? How can I fix it? On my way home. How can I make this right? What can I do for you? That is totally how I feel. And then after that, I'm like, I'm sorry. I mean, I apologize. It was not good enough. And this was my best friend. Wow. What did your heart do when you realized that you had sent that? Physically ill. That wouldn't have affected me. If the person would have texted me back and been like upset, I'd have been like, hey, the kid's being a brat. It was probably the behind the back thing. Yeah, that's the deal. That's exactly because she was saying it to someone else. And it's like, if you're my best friend. Yeah.

2:16:33It's not like I was telling another friend. It was my sister. My sister wasn't about to talk crap. She wasn't going to talk crap. She just listened. My sister is just like a sounding board. And that's what I told her. I'm like, you know what? She didn't say anything. It was me. I was just venting. You know, it was not. She should probably get over it. Okay. I'm going to figure out. Thank you for the call. I'm going to figure out some text message etiquette right now. Okay? Now. If you were ever to text back, okay, cool, or acknowledgement in any way, are you saying not necessary? Not necessary. No, it's absolutely necessary. If it's someone. I'll ask you a question. I want to go get my phone right now. If I ask you a question. Yeah. And you stare at me blankly. Right. Is that rude? What if the text message doesn't end in a question mark? Okay. It's just like, okay, then we'll meet at the. When you leave somebody, when you leave, when you are talking to somebody, you're having a conversation, when the conversation's over, do you usually give a salute, like a, hey, all right, good to see you, take care? Or do you just go? No, they walk away. They just turn and walk? Turn and walk away. No, it's just, it's an etiquette thing. Thank you. This is on a phone. Come on, I'm not standing in someone's face. You guys, think about this. Think about the danger of...

2:17:49Oh, I didn't get that. You must not have got that. That's the thing. We all know that everybody gets the text messages. We hear it all the time. Emails and texts, BS. You guys, you're my friends. If it was someone that didn't normally text me, I would respond. But if it's someone who you talk to every day and you know you're going to see them and probably talk about it again the next day, why do you have to just write, okay? Write cool. How hard is that? Cool. Well, okay, unnecessary. The text messaging can be going back like 12 times. Well, let's meet here. Let's meet here. Okay. Cool. Then it's settled. Cool. We're meeting at the Chinese restaurant at 8 o'clock. See you there. Unnecessary. Unnecessary for the okay, then it's settled. We're meeting. You already said that. Unnecessary for the other person to write back and go, okay. After we've already texted like 12 times. Cool. See you there. I've already been annoyed that my phone keeps going. See you there. I will say this, though. I forget that they didn't text back. I don't. You don't? That drives me. Okay. So you're waiting for the okay. Perfect example. You are a text control freak. My wife last night and I are texting. And she texts me something about something. And I write her back and say, hey, go read my blog. Because the name of my blog last night was Jamie. And I said, go read my blog. Never heard back from her.

2:19:14I was wigging out. I was like, I didn't hear how the blog, how she thought the blog was. Didn't know where she was. She fell asleep. Oh, yeah. And so it upset you that you thought maybe there was something wrong. Yeah, I woke her up at 620 this morning as I'm driving into work. I'm like, where are you? You didn't even respond to my blog. She's like, I fell asleep. So how's that? If she was asleep, she wasn't going to write anything. Right. But what I'm saying is that's that's the freak out that I get when I don't get the response of even saying. Okay, I will go read it right now. Yeah, but that's a different situation because that's like you telling her, you put your heart on the line, probably said some really nice things about her. Well, I did, but I just said go read my blog. See, I would have been waiting for the 15 minute, like, after the person read it, what their reaction was. And I got nothing. Not the okay. No, I see. I need the okay. I need the okay. The justification to my... You're an insecure texter. No, dudes need respect. Yeah, respect. That's respectful to a dude. Oh, my gosh. I'm being respectful by even responding in the first place. Respect me. Stop it. Respect me. Let's take a couple calls. M1 Danger what? M1 Danger. Say what it is. Danger what? Danger Neck. Danger Neck. Go ahead, Danger Neck. Hey, first of all, I love the new show, Mike. You guys are doing a great job. Thank you, bro. Thank you.

2:20:34Sure, and have you guys ever had the issue where you text somebody and you're trying to be funny, but it doesn't come across like that? Like, sarcasm just does not work. Yep. That's why I always put the wink face or the smiley. Yeah, wink or smiley on that one. Lauren does not put wink face or smiley, and she writes the, like, you're like, what? Really? Very sarcastic. She's very sarcastic on. It's a waste of characters for me to do the smiley and the winky. I only get a certain amount. Are you kidding? You're kidding. Okay. You have like a character plan? What's that? You don't have unlimited characters? No. Really? I have to like continue and start a new one. I know. That's weird. I am now studying every single text. I did not say Coolio, by the way. To Lauren O'Brien, I will find your Coolio. There is no way. You send like eight part text messages and I'm like, wow, I wish I could do that. Eight part text messages. What does that mean? I'll get it in three parts. Yeah, I get those from you too, pal. Oh, yeah. It's because they don't have the iPhones. It's because you've got BlackBerrys. I have the iPhones, so it comes in one. I don't make iPhone money, dude. Oh, really? Your BlackBerry is just as expensive. Sorry, dude. Okay, I get 160 characters. You get what? 160 characters. Isn't that like Twitter? Yeah, that's about... Well, you get 140 in Twitter. What do you guys get on iPhone? 1,607. Really?

2:22:05I swear we have unlimited. Yeah, I think it'll just separate it out for you, which it should do. I have to restart. Me too. It's annoying. It's the beating. You're not going to find Coolio in there, dude, because it never happened. Oh, it was an email. It never happened, dude. It was an email, and you responded. Coolio? You said Coolio. You're making stuff up. I'm going to find it right now. I love it so much. And when I find it, I'm going to scan it. I'm searching my phone for Coolio right now. I know. That's what I'm going to do. I'm going to scan it. Listeners are falling asleep right now while we're searching for emails. Let's see. M1, Chris, are you there? Yes, sir. Good morning, Mikey. Good morning. Yeah, so I had just gone to my girlfriend's house and let her borrow my car to go to the gym. Her car was in the shop. She gets to the gym. I bust out this big engagement ring I had just bought for her. And I'm showing her roommate. I take a picture of it and intend to send it to my brother. I send it to her. And I'm like, I say to her roommate, I'm like, I got to borrow your car. She's like, why? I said, I just sent the ring to Chantel. She gives me her car. I'm Tokyo drifting. It's a gym. What does that mean?

2:23:30I'm talking to Verizon and trying to figure out a way to delete this text message. And they're like, sorry, sir, there's nothing we can do for you. Maybe if it was an older phone because, like, the messages load. I'm like, oh, okay, okay. So I get to the gym. I pull in, run inside, run past the guy who greets you. No way. You with the gym? Run past him. I'm like, Chantel, hey, where's your phone? She's like, what are you doing here? I'm like, just checking on you. Where's your phone? It's like in the car. I'm like, okay, I'm just going to. Okay, I'll be right back. Run to the car. She didn't see it. I deleted it. But, man, I thank God that she didn't see it. That's rad. That almost broke my heart. I know. That's so great. She was upset at me because she thought that I didn't trust her. So I was checking out on her to go to the gym. I just wanted to tell her. Yeah, you eventually did. Is she now your wife? No, we're engaged. This was last June, so we're just playing it right now. Congratulations. Congratulations. Good luck with that. Love this song. It's a good color. Citizen Cope, right? Citizen Cope. The sun's gonna rise. Sounds like Everlast. Yeah, it does. It does. Then you really might know what it's like. Why do you have to be a hater?

2:24:57This kid named Johnny used to make that stack down on the corner. It sounds just like Everlast. If you like to eat McDonald's, wait till I tell you who says it's okay. And then, and then, speaking of throwing under the bus, wait till I tell you, wait till I tell you what Woodsy said to Sienna yesterday at the movie theater. It's next. For over 80 years, USAA has served the financial needs of our soldiers, veterans, and their families. No matter where you are, you can handle your finances anytime with our secure online banking. From free ATMs nationwide to mortgages and cash bonuses when buying and selling your home through USAA's real estate program, USAA Bank provides a full financial suite of banking services. And if you qualify, you can even deposit a check using an iPhone or computer scanner.

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2:31:50Back to the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. That's what I thought. I mean, that's what I was in my head, though. I blame what you blame me. It has been like a kindergarten classroom in here. I'm really glad we're back. We just spent we just spent so much time not like preparing for the next on air break. And the reason. is because we were furiously checking our phones, emails, and text messages for who in this room said Coolio. Why don't we reveal to our listeners who it wasn't, first of all. I owe Stephen R. Woods. Stephen L. Woods. What's your middle name? Lee. I owe Stephen Lee Woods an apology.

2:33:07Because it was actually Lauren or Brian. The like. I outed myself. The epitome of cool. The epitome of like. She's like the Miles Davis of the Mikey show. Sure. Like she is the coolest kid in the room. Yeah. Too cool. And the reason, like, you know, I just know Woodsy as being like, you know. A clown. Cool guy. Yeah. A cool clown. And I'm like, so when it came to my mind, I'm like. How could Woodsy write Coolio? And so right before we go to break, I see Woods looking at a cell phone. Didn't realize it was Lauren's at the time. Thought it was his. And he's got this look on his face at me like, hey, Lil Boots, you're busted. And what was I doing, Mikey? Giggling like a school girl. Sniggling. Jumping up and down. Jumping up and down. So happy. And so Woodsy's like, I got you, pal. I got you. It was you that wrote Coolio. And I'm like, no way. I'm like, I mean, I'm lame, but there's no way I'm Coolio. Lauren even said in the last break when this even came up, she's like, I say Coolio sometimes, but only in person. Apparently more than you thought that you do. I think I pulled out the like rolling with the homies bit. You did. So they go, so they go, they go.

2:34:31Woodsy goes, yeah, it's Lauren's phone. You texted Coolio to her. And I'm like, I'm inside. I'm like, why, Mike? Why did you? Why did you do that? Mike, why did you say Coolio? You idiot. Not you. You idiot. There's nothing wrong with Coolio. It's funny. Is it? Yeah. Anyway, I thought I was outing Mike. She very sheepishly turns to me and says. Oh. Turns out I wrote cool. Idiot. I'm an idiot. Idiot. Well, yep, I admit when I'm wrong. So you know what Mr. Cool Guy Woods just did? What? I split my pants. You did? I split my pants. Are you kidding? I'm not commando today, but I... Can you not show her your, you know... Look, Sienna, he's spreading his legs. Yeah, he's spreading his legs at Sienna. Hey, don't scooch up. Give me a favor. He has plaid boxers. I just saw that. Thank God. You tore your pants? Yeah, dude. I'm fat. I was bending down. Of course, I was bending down to look for some jelly in the refrigerator, and I hear this. I hear. Can I? Yeah. I bend down, and I hear.

2:35:53I really like how he grabbed one of my stories. He grabbed one of Lauren's and he's like, oh, but I got to put that back. But yeah, so I now have a hole in my pants and my junk is dangling. Easy chubs. You know, it might be time to stop hitting the jelly when you rip your pants going to get it. I'm going to get myself. I'm going to start wearing like a track suit up here. Dude, can we please? Yes. I can't believe he told me that yesterday. What? Don't you remember what you said to me about what I was wearing? Dude. Yeah. I don't want to talk about it. We are. So we go see the movie. We go see a movie on Wednesday. And Sienna had on those really cool. Guys think they're cool. Yeah. And I know chicks think they're cool. They're those velour pants. The kind that say juicy on the butt. They didn't say juicy on the butt. I'm saying that kind.

2:36:52Mine was juicy. It was that kind. The soft velour with a little jacket. Soft velour. And Woods goes, oh, man, I wish I could wear a pair like that. And we were like, are you kidding me? He goes, no, dude, I would wear them. No one on the M1 site should make some sort of Photoshop picture. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. In a velour track suit. Looking over my shoulder with Juicy on my butt. Juicy on the butt. Yeah, please don't do that. Nobody better do that. Don't do that. Don't do that. Nobody better Photoshop. Woodchip, do not do that. Can you find a six-foot-two woman? Vince Vaughn. Put Vince Vaughn's head on, it's fine. Oh, dude, that is the funniest thing. And so I'm dying laughing. And Woodsy goes, come on, dude, isn't there stuff that girls do that you wish you could do? I'm like, what, like have a period? What do you mean? What are you even talking about? Yeah, I don't think you're going to want that. He goes, no, like, you know, wear velour, track stuff. He goes, if I could do it, I would do it. I would wear a juicy, if they made juicy sweatsuits for men, I would wear one.

2:38:03Write that down. Do you know how comfortable those things look? They are comfortable. I mean, but like the leggings, if I can avoid wearing jeans or pants, I will. I'm going to avoid wearing jeans from now on. Now that you're splitting them. Yeah, now that I'm 400 pounds. No, it's because you wear the same jeans every day. I do. That's what you said. They're probably just overworn. I have one pair that I like, and I wear them out until they all split right here, right by my piece. Is there any? Is there anything that dudes do that you ladies and oh, please call about this. Guys or girls. If you're a man or a woman and there's stuff that women do, fellas, that you wish that you could do for whatever reason. And ladies, if there's something that guys do that you wish that you can do. There's so many things. Without the obvious. For girls, the obvious is going to be, oh, I wish I could, you know, go number one standing up. That's going to be the obvious one. No, but like. You guys are comfortable every day. Look what you get to wear. We have to wear tight jeans. You get to wear loose t-shirts. You get to wear t-shirts every day and you look hot. So you would do that? You would wear a t-shirt if you could? If I wore a t-shirt, I feel like a slob. Yeah, because girls can't wear t-shirts. You know what they can do? What? They get to order pina colada or strawberry daiquiri if they like. That's true. And I can't. That's true. As delicious as they are.

2:39:29I cannot order a strawberry daiquiri. Yeah, you're not going to look fantastic doing that. No way, dude. I'm telling you. They would have to fill it in a Budweiser bottle for me to be able to have it. And I'm like, no, it's a Budweiser. Could you please blend me up a banana daiquiri, but put it in the Budweiser bottle? Yeah, put it in a Budweiser bottle. The way that you do it is you go, hey, could I have a strawberry daiquiri, man? I don't think that even helps. That doesn't help. They're like, okay. Anything you ladies would do, that guys can do, you wish you could? Well, first of all, I'm here to say that women can wear T-shirts. No. Yes, I can. Wait, wait, wait. Lauren, women can do everything that a man can do anyway. Yeah. You know what? As a woman, I'm fully capable of putting a t-shirt on my body. Everything that a man can do, a woman can do. Lauren, not a regular crew neck t-shirt. Yeah, why not? Because it won't look right. To you. No, come on. Lauren, actually.

2:40:26tries to pee standing up just to prove a point. I've seen her in the men's bathroom. Not true. That's awkward. Lauren, you would never, except to go to sleep, women will wear men's t-shirts to go to sleep. I'm talking about the men cut, the male men cut. crew neck t-shirt. You would never, ever, and no woman would ever, unless she's going, if she's a big fan of Ricky Rudd and she's going to the race at Fontana, yeah, then she'll do it. Let's see what I can pull off all next week. Oh, okay. But it has to be like a loose. I'll give you $5 to wear a men's, to get one of your boyfriend Matt's t-shirts. All right. Dollar a day. Wear it. Seems like a fair challenge. A dollar a day. You wear a different t-shirt. Yeah. I'll do it. Will you really? We can all do it, but you're not going to feel cute. You're not going to feel cute. I'll feel like a million bucks. You will not feel like one million bucks. Just to prove a point, she will. She'll make it happen. She'll pull it off. I have a caveat. It's a loose t-shirt. It's got to be loose. I'll wear Matt's t-shirts every day next week.

2:41:37When you walk out of this building. And I will have no shame. She's going to change. When you walk out of this building, first of all, as soon as the elevator doors open up downstairs and you walk into the general public, you will blush. You will know that every eye. You can't tie a knot in the back of it either. Right. Mikey, she'll put her cardigan made of wheat on over it as soon as she walks out of here. Girls got bigger fish to fry. Okay. Girl doesn't like to be told what to do. I'm not talking about frying fish. Though women are really good at frying fish and making dinner. But, but, but, you're not going to feel comfortable. Okay, here's the deal. I'll bring you five t-shirts next week. Yeah. All right. I'll bring you five. Gross. And you've got to wear five of mine. They'll be freshly washed. Yeah, I know. They'll be freshly washed with organic detergent. What size? XLs. Really? Yeah. You're going to wear an XL t-shirt? Eight. This is all of a sudden a new XL challenge. Okay. That's what I'm saying. Get her a small t-shirt. Even a small t-shirt. Hey, I'll wear Matt's. He's 6'1". Dude, I like girls in tight, small t-shirts. Those are money. But that's not what we're talking about. Totally different thing. What I'm saying in the whole t-shirt thing is that it's loose and baggy and comfortable. There's no breasts exposed. You look like a man. I got a man. I don't need...

2:42:56To be objectified by the general public. Oh, you will feel objectified. I can keep going with so many more. M1 Ponzo. Hey, what's up, Mikey? What's up? Dude, I woke up one morning, totally out of the subject. Woke up one morning to find that you were no longer on the radio. Having listened to the show, you converted my wife into a P1 back then. I just want to say it's freaking awesome to have you back on the radio. Oh, thank you, bro. Thank you very much. I appreciate it. Oh, that's awesome. Tell everybody that you know. I am. You should talk to my wife. I'm like a little kid at the candy store now. Yeah, there's a lot of people that don't know, man. We're trying to spread the word and get the word out there. Do it, bro. Yeah, thank you very much. Hey, do you know anybody that flies airplanes with signs behind them? I do. Okay, yeah, then let me put you on hold and I'll have you fly a plane. That's what you do? Do you really do that? No, I don't. I was like, that's convenient. Thank you, Ponzo. Later. Thank you.

2:43:54M1 Carrie is on the line. Hi, Carrie. Hi, how are you? Good. I just wanted to say that Lauren should be able to wear a T-shirt that sits her. Guys wear T-shirts that sit them. No, no. That ain't the spirit of the agreement. I'm saying baggy. Yeah, that's Sienna's whole point. Sienna says, hey, listen, as a woman. I wish that I could pull off being able to wear a comfortable guy T-shirt because they're comfortable. But she's right. Women, if you wear a guy T-shirt, you're going to look. I'm going to say it. I'm going to say it like a slob. Yes. I would like to say. Guys wear the fitted t-shirts, too. When the guys look hot, they're wearing the shirt that's a little more fitted to their body. But Carrie... You guys are looking at all these exceptions. I'm meaning in general. We're talking about the regular... You know, we're not talking about the guys that are wearing the t-shirts from Baby Gap. Yeah. Okay, we're talking... The Smediums. Yeah, the Smediums. The Smedium size shirt. Creatine shirt. Right. We're talking about the regular crew neck.

2:45:02t-shirt that guys wear picture a concert tee yeah okay that's what we're talking i think she's saying like a guy doesn't wear like matt's t-shirt's gonna come down to my knee i think she's saying a guy doesn't go ahead and wear that that gigantic so right right right and i'm fine with you wearing a t-shirt that that sort of uh you know fits you lengthwise but it has to be Baggy. Because that's what they are with a guy. That's what's comfortable. I'm in. I'm not scared. I'll bring you five. I can't wait. But this is a challenge. This is not like, you would not go out to a party wearing that. And they would. Here's the deal. This is what I'm saying. We have to, so next week when we go to the movies. Oh, yeah. And when we go to lunch. You will be in my giant social distortion t-shirt. I'm not going to be in your t-shirts. Huh? I'm not going to be in your t-shirts. Why not? I'll wear Matt's. I'm bigger than Matt. So? We didn't say. Wearing an extra large. It'll be the same thing. I got a feeling Matt might wear us medium from time to time. He's got a nice, you know, he's got a nice body. He's a trim guy. Hey, dude, I think you're selling yourself short, Woodsman. No, I'm not. Yeah, dude, you're selling yourself short, dude. I think you've got a great body slamming. That's creepy that you know about my body. You've never seen my body. No, I'm just saying, dude, when you're standing there, I'm just telling you bro to bro.

2:46:22You know, like, I think you're putting yourself down here. You are hot, dude. He's an admirer. Yeah, that's weird. You ripped your pants. He can see a little more than he's used to. That's really weird. Dude, you know what? It's so crazy. I'm a seamstress. Oh, so you can fit him. You're a seamstress? You can sew that up? I'm a seamstress. I can sew that up. That's good to know. You know what? I'll bring him in tomorrow and you can do it tomorrow. You're not going to do it right now while I'm wearing them. Dude, what are you freaking out about? You're overreacting over here. What's the big deal? Come here. That's how it's done, right? Yeah, we'll take care of it right now. It's no big deal. Come on. It's cool. It's cool. 570-1949. I have more guy things that I wish I could do. Okay. And, like, people are going to argue and say you can. I'm just going to say it, but this is a general thing that I would never do in public. Uh-huh. When I go, you know, do my little workouts and stuff, like go on a walk, walk the dog, you know, get a sweat going. Sometimes I want to spit while I'm working out. That's awesome. My mouth fills and I want to spit. That's awesome. I can't just do it, though. Are you just going to put it on a tee for me? Dude, that's fantastic. But you know what I mean? Like, if you guys do it, like, no one even is like, ew. But if I were to do it, people would be repulsive. Oh, yeah. It would be repulsive.

2:47:43Yeah. Repugnant. Repugnant. Repugnant. It'd be filthy. If we were walking on the boardwalk at OB getting an ice cream cone and you went... If you didn't even hock, it didn't even matter. If you just went... When I was in high school, I dated a Finnish foreign exchange student. She was beautiful and didn't know that I was not good looking. Why are you laughing with? Because in Finland... In Finland... I guess I, you know, I was the hot guy in Finland. I don't know. Okay. I'm surprised you're not doing Finland radio. Yeah, for real. Seriously. And so she was dating me. And we went to lunch at McDonald's in high school. Classy. Very. Hey, in high school, McDonald's was like the cool thing to do. Okay. It was cool. Still is. In high school, you know, it's still, I mean, Rebecca and I will go park there now and make out. You know, anyway. French. Just kidding. Yeah. It's the grossest word. Anyway, so we are walking into the McDonald's. And apparently in Finland, girls are okay going, no way. I mean, pulling it all the way from the back of the sinuses. No way. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, she, dude. Yeah, she. Seriously. I'm telling you.

2:49:10You're fine. Lauren and I both saw it at the same time and reacted. What if I did that? What if I did that? We would vomit. That's disgusting. If you did it, it would be gross. He popped a loogie with dip in his mouth and spit it into a narrow little water bottle opening. And he sits in the middle of Lauren and I, and we watched it happen, and both fell off of our chairs. I would just like to say, though, I'm equally as grossed out if a guy or a girl does it. Really? I spit all the time. Ladies, he's taken. Yeah, but Lauren, you have to admit that socially, it's a little bit more shocking. Yeah. I can't wait to see Lauren in her big baggy t-shirt spitting at the mall when we go see a movie or wherever we go. Scratching my private. Right. Guys can do that. You guys do it all the time. You think we can't tell when your hand's in your pocket? We can tell. What do they call that? Pocket billiards? Sometimes you have to adjust the boys. Yeah, I've had to learn, though, that I need to be.

2:50:28Now that we have a webcam, it's really perfect. I caught myself picking my nose the other day. Yeah. On webcam. But I have to admit, I adjust the girls sometimes, too. You do? I have to. Well, you have to. You need a couple of men on that. You need a couple of people on that. Yeah, you get a couple of construction workers that need to come in and help lift them. Yeah, well, she says they don't run in the family, they gallop. They gallop, yeah. Let's see. Is this M1 defective? Is this M1 defective? That's M1 Defectee. I defected to your show. Ah, there you go. What's up, brother? Hey, man. So I can't help but sometimes wish being a girl would be a little bit easier for guys because you only get tickets. There's not really much a guy can do to get out of it. Nothing you can do. Women who could show some skin and possibly get away with it. Or cry. They don't have to show skin. They can cry or flirt. Cry or flirt. Lauren O'Brien, have you ever gotten out of a ticket? Every time but one. Every... I just got dizzy. Every time but one? Yeah, we're talking like face-to-face tickets with people. Because I've gotten parking tickets where they haven't seen me. But yeah, just pull out the tears. Question. Yeah. I think you just answered it, though. So you actually do something different than the LOB that we know? You mean cry? When they pull you over. Well, I genuinely get upset. They're not crocodile tears. I'm like...

2:51:55I'm so scared of authority, so I start crying. Really? Yeah. And you get out of it every time. You know what? Hey, just slow it down, sister. Wow. It's genius. But one time the guy was having none of it. None of it. I remember the jerkiest cop that ever pulled me over. His last name was Wood. I'll never forget the guy. Sienna, have you ever had... Have you ever gotten out of a ticket because you flirt or you're cute? I've only been pulled over one time and that was right when I just got my license when I was 16. Now that I said that, watch I get pulled over like today. Just hang those things out the window. You'll be fine. I was 16. I didn't know. I didn't get out of it. Just hang them out the window. You'll be fine. She leans over. She opens the window and just leans out. What is this? Yes, I have big boobs. Yeah, we get it. We get it. All right. Your jugs are here. We know. Mrs. Jugs. I don't hang them out the window. I would. 570-1949. Or you could text us 949mikey at gmail.com. Let us know what you get. My poor dad. Poor guy.

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3:00:37KBZT San Diego. The Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of The Mikey Show. FM 94.9. Is M1 Woodship on it? Is M1 Woodship? Yes. What is it? He's done the... He's done it again. He's done it again. The Mikey Show with rapper Lil Boots. This dude is... Brilliant. We got an M1 named M1 Woodchip who takes pictures of us. And we're now providing him with the pictures. Like, we're even taking pictures to give him so that he can Photoshop stuff into it. We got to have him in. Oh, yeah. He's got to be in on a Friday. He is so rad. He's awesome. Oh, these will be up tonight. Yeah. Well, they'll be up this morning. We'll get them up right away. Yeah, we'll get them up ASAP. That's so funny. The Mikey Show is myself.

3:02:22And my boy Woodsy and Sienna and Lauren and Jay. And our number here is 570-1949. And you can also text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. So who says that it's okay to eat McDonald's, Sienna? Well, Mike, meals have been approved by Weight Watchers to go on sale at McDonald's. Really? Starting in New Zealand. Wow. Uh-huh. Now, let me just tell you. Now, these are McDonald's items that Weight Watchers are recommending. Yeah. The Filet-O-Fish. Uh-huh. Get. Chicken McNuggets. Delicious. And sweet chili seared chicken wraps. Ooh. They have been approved by Weight Watchers, their program. Yeah. And each meal, each one of those I listed is worth 6.5 points on the program. Now, I have done Weight Watchers. So, what's the point they mean? You control, it's calories, basically. They take calories, the fiber content, and like protein. I forget exactly how they do it. And they give you a little chart and it tells you how much each serving is worth. You get so many points a day that you can use. Like I was allowed to have 20 points a day, you know, and you can use them however you want. So you could have like three filet of fish. Like I could eat a jar of pickles and it would be like one point, you know. Right now, right now I have a...

3:03:48Somewhere in the neighborhood of 250 points. No, it depends on how much you weigh. The more you weigh, the more points you get. Well, then 350 points. No, I think it's from 20 to 30, I think. No, no. For me, though, in an average day, now, I have about 350. Now is what I have. But I'm telling you, Weight Watchers is legit. I had to do, for an old radio station I worked on, we did a weight loss competition and whoever lost the least amount of weight on the show had to get up at street scene in front of everyone in a bikini for me or a Speedo for a guy. So I was determined to lose weight. I lost like 15 pounds in a month. Can you guys imagine if we did that? Oh my gosh. I had to do it. Listen, I would take a samurai sword before I would put it on a... Can I? What? The email I sent you? What is it? I sent Mikey an email about a week ago that I got from somebody that has a new diet. And I sent it to Mikey and go, what are your thoughts? Could be cool. He writes back. He's like, absolutely not. I don't even remember it. You don't remember it? Yeah. A Speedo diet? That wasn't necessarily the Speedo diet, but it was a new diet. And somebody wanted us to try it. And I just rhymed.

3:05:11And I sent it to Mikey and said, hey, maybe we do this. It could be funny. And you're like, yeah, no, we're not doing that. I do not even remember that. That's weird. No, yeah. So I did. I ended up having to get on stage at Street Scene in front of thousands of people in my bikini because guys can lose weight a lot easier than women. Of course. I lost 15 pounds in a month. That's pretty darn good. That's really good. Yeah. So I was looking pretty good at the time. Yeah, you lost your 15. But still, that was a nightmare. I mean, I had nightmares about it every night before. So we went and saw the movie Sherlock Holmes yesterday. It was Jay's pick. Yes. And we will give the movie one out of five stars. And I would give it a three. I give it three stars, and we will go around the room and just give it the amount of stars, then we'll discuss. So I give it three. Sienna. I'm going to go ahead and say I can't answer that question. N-A. Are you going to answer not available? Not applicable. Not applicable. Because I was awake for maybe five minutes. That is 100%. Money well spent. That is a true fact. Yeah.

3:06:31Woodsy, out of five. Four. Lauren O'Brien. Three. And Jay. I would give it two and a half. Wow. Really? Yeah, you know, it was slow, and I think they were going for the dark, you know, kind of feel of it. And it had some good qualities. And Rachel, whatever her name is, was in it. Yeah. Amazing. She's fine. What did you think of her with no makeup on? Hot. When did she have no makeup on? Dude, the whole movie. No, she. Guys don't understand. She was Milky White. Natural makeup look, Mike. You'll never see anything on the silver screen with no makeup. Ever. No makeup to me. I was like, wow, somebody's been camping for a couple of weeks. Charlize Theron in Monster. But that was even like, she was wearing makeup to look. She was wearing special effects makeup to look even worse. That's not when you're supposed to hit it. Sorry. Don't look at the camera. Yeah. Don't look at the camera. I loved it. I thought it was great. And I'll tell you what, Robert Downey Jr., pound for pound, maybe the greatest of all time. I wouldn't go that. I would. He's just saying that because people say he looks like him. Not anymore. I look like Chris Farley now, but maybe back in my younger days. Paul Blart. I didn't understand any of the movie.

3:08:03Not one solitary baby. What? Didn't understand it, but I gave it three stars because it had cool explosions. What are you, seven? Yeah. Didn't get it. Dude, why? You loved it. Like, I sat next to you. Yeah, dude. You guys were yucking it up. Listen, fight scene, explosions, any time there was action, some of the best stuff I've ever seen on film. Fight scenes were money, how he'd lay it out before he would do it in his head. Yeah. It was brilliant. How did you like? Whenever there was a loud noise and Lauren O'Brien would jump three. So loud. Here's what I, you know, Lauren was not pleased about the selection of the movie. And five minutes into the movie, I hear, she's like. She's sniggling. She loved it. There were some good one-liners. I did think like what Jay thought, it moved kind of slow. And I thought the really, the cheapest thing about it was, do you remember what I said at the end, Mike? No. I said. Sequel. Oh, yeah. Because they didn't even give you a clear ending. It was just opening, you know. You said sequel, and I was like, oh, yeah, totally. For sure. And inside my head, I was like, I don't even know why she said that. I don't understand what happened, so I'm not really sure why there would be a sequel. You do that all the time, Mike. Totally set it up for one, right? Right? Because of the guy. Yeah. I know, dude. I know. We don't have to talk about it anymore. We don't even have to say. Because we know it'll be a good sequel. I thought it was awesome, dude. I think Downey was incredible. Jude Law, who I really.

3:09:28don't care for, I thought he was brilliant, too. I was pleasantly surprised overall, but it was a little slow. I'd watch it again. I've yawned like three times since we talked about it. I know, because you've slept the whole movie. Well, Mikey, Taylor Swift wasn't in it. So Sienna's not going to watch. I fell asleep once. Yes. I fell asleep a few times, too. In the movie? Yeah. It's hard. We wake up so early, and then, you know, when you're in a dark place, and you're... tired and it's like... You know what my favorite part of the movie was? The Iron Man trailer. That looks good. I can't wait. Looks great. I love Mickey Rourke. He's going to be so... Is that who that is? Yeah, Mickey Rourke is the bad guy. He's going to be so good in that role. He looks tough. He does look tough. I love that dude, man. I got an email I want to read to you guys. Let's see what you guys think of this. You can call, too. 570-1949 is the number. Says, Mikey, I was wondering if you could help me out with some relationship advice. I've recently started dating this girl and we've started the process of hanging out with each other's friends. I really liked her friends a lot and they seem to like me too. However, she despises my friends so far and I don't know what to do about it. I don't want to be one of those guys who ditches his boys for a chick. What should I do? Thank you, M1 Torn. Well,

3:10:55First of all, I believe that who you're hanging with says a lot about you. Yeah. And so if she doesn't like your friends, she's going to get to know a lot about you pretty soon if you're just dating. Yeah. You're just starting to date. That means that there's something. Whatever is creeping her out about your friends exists in you. If it weren't so, you wouldn't be hanging out with them. It's true. That's why you hang with them. And so if she don't like your friends pretty soon, she's going to go, how come you? How come you? How come you? Well, some people are more like they're the most mature of their group of friends or mature. Like me and my group of friends. Oh, really? Oh, really? Mike. Yeah. You and I are pretty different people. Yeah. We're friends. Yeah. We're good friends. Yeah. How good? We're good friends. No, we are. But you also know this. You know that I am. there's a lot of things that you do that I don't, you know, I don't hang with. Right. And when you do that stuff, I'm not there. But when you do other stuff, like, for instance, what did I say? I want to go see you play baseball. Absolutely. You're going to play baseball. Good point. So I would, you know, and who am I going to bring? Your wife. My wife and my kids. This guy, I think, in this email needs to watch out because it sounds like, to me, because my friends, to me, are very important.

3:12:24Yeah. Just like my wife's friends are very important to her. Yeah. And, dude, you got to be careful because if she's not liking your boys, that's who you grew up with. That's who you came up with. There's an old saying. I don't want to say it. Bros before. Yeah. Bros before hoes. Bros before hoes. I didn't want to get a fine. Yeah, I never know what I should say. Yeah, hoes is okay to say. Y'all can't say hoes on the air. Well. That's too late, by the way. We've said it three or four times, but that's the old saying, man. And your boys, more than likely, are always going to be there for you. See, this whole thing of, you know, growing up with these guys and blah, blah, blah. See, to me, it's the same concept. I mean, unless you grow up to be mature, you know what I mean? Right. Unless you grow up and you grow out of it. Hey, listen, when we were in Dallas, Woodsy, right? Right. We would hang out together. Yeah. All right. And I was a little different. You were a lot different. I was a lot different. And we hung out all the time. Right? Right. And I was different. You know what's funny, though? What? We laugh more now. And we have a better time now. And we are 50,000 times better friends than we were then. 100%.

3:13:47I think it's because Mike can remember it now. Right, yeah. That helps. One of us can. Yeah, we used to party together with Z and I. That seems like a million years ago. What about girls? See, here's the thing. My wife's friends, I love her friends. Right. Because her friends are a lot like her. You know, they kind of even remind me. If I'm trying to get something. For my wife, I can call any of her friends. That's rad. And go, here's what I'm thinking about getting, blah, blah, blah. And they will know. Because they're like the same person. They're very similar. Mine are not. I mean, there's some that are like me. And then, like, I have a very diverse group of friends. Yeah. They all like different things. They all have different views. They all live different places. They all, you know, they're different. I bet they're sweet, though. Yeah. I bet they're like you in that way, that they're sweet girls. Yeah, they're all really nice. Yeah. But I don't think Todd would ever, I mean, maybe. I don't know if he would ever call, though, and say, you know, I'm thinking about getting her something. Do you have any recommendations? You can tell a lot about a person by who they hang with. Mm-hmm. Lauren O'Brien? Yes. What are your friends like? Well, I'm kind of like Sienna in that way. I have a couple different groups of friends that I have different interests with different.

3:15:04But I think it's more the overall character, if they're good people and if they seem like good people with good intentions. But this email bums me out because that's such a hard situation to be in. I can't imagine if I hated my boyfriend's friends or vice versa. When I see him with his closest friends, who are the guys that he grew up with and went to high school with, I like him the most because he seems, and with his family as well, he seems so in his element and happy. It makes him the most comfortable. If I didn't like his friends, that would look good. I don't know that we know anything about your friends. Do we know anything about your friends? Probably not. I don't think we do. Except that they're awesome. I bet they shop at Whole Foods. Not all of them. I bet they eat barley. I bet they don't eat bacon. No, not all of them. I bet they don't feast on cheeseburgers. And what burgers? Cheeseburgers. Yeah, they do. Some of them do. vegetarian cheeseburgers. Not a lot of milkshakes. They're all into running. They're all super fit. Do you have any fat friends?

3:16:13Do you have... That's a mean thing to say. I mean, is she going to... She's like, yeah, three. My friend Tracy in Minnesota, she's huge. Like, what? My friend Wilma from PB and Karen, if you're listening, sorry. You are a little chunky. From El Paso, sorry. I can think of... I can think of one instance with one of my friends where she had a boyfriend that we didn't like and he didn't like us and it did not last. And I really quickly need to tell you why there was this not liking of each other. Why? Because in the beginning, we all went out to dinner. He's from Santa Cruz, Northern California. Came down here. We all went to Old Town. Got some Mexican food. And throughout the dinner, he... All he kept saying was how bad the Mexican food is in San Diego. And you don't. Hey, get out. Woodsy, you know why he's doing that? Because he likes Tex-Mex. He likes Tex-Mex. Well, so did this guy. Mexican food here is brutal. It's delicious. You don't say it to San Diego. You're Mexican, though. You just call it food. Dude, I'm telling you. It's just food to you. Stop. I'm telling you, Woodsy. Woodsy's used to eating.

3:17:32Stir-fried bell peppers and onions. And he calls it Mexican food. They chop up steak into stir-fried bell peppers and onions. They're like, yeah, it's Mexican food. Muy bien. But you need to be able to read your audience. And this guy, and my friend is probably listening right now, so mad that I'm even bringing this up. But that was the breaking point. We were like, yeah. You cannot diss our Mexican food. That is what we have and that is what we love. And this guy, you know, kept defending himself. He was out. He was out. That's snotty of you guys, though, man, because the guy's entitled to his opinion. No, but he was a jerk about it. And throughout the dinner, he kept answering his phone. This is Ben. And it's like. Get off from the table, man. Maybe he's a doctor. Who are you? Because he was not a doctor. Now, what was weird was his name was John. So that was the show. Just looking for laughs. I don't know. I mean, I love my friend and she deserves better. Than a dude that doesn't like San Diegan Mexican food?

3:18:32That seems a little immature. Poor bastard. It does. Poor bastard. Well, I mean, for a guy to not like Mexican food, and even if he's kind of like mouthy about it. Walking into the La Jolla Lions, Dan. All right. All right. If you went to Spain and you were sitting with a bunch of Spaniards and they said, these tapas really suck. That's exactly what I would say. These tapas are so much better. That's disrespectful. These tapas are so much better in France. Hey, Steve, how do you like the tapas here in Spain? Well, frankly, I think it sucks. You would not say that. I would say, I'm not a fan. I don't like it. No, the Spaniards would be like, get out of our country then. Although, although. I'd tell them to kick rocks. I would want to know what the rest of his personality was about. No, he was lame. But I just think, you know, if you don't like all of your boyfriend's friends, there's a problem. Okay, okay. So you guys come to Dallas to visit. And our team goes to Dallas to visit, right? We're going to go to stay at the kids' lake house for a weekend. Family trip. And we all go to Uncle Julio's, which is a delicious Mexican food place. And we sit down. You guys, the four of you, don't think you guys would clown and be...

3:19:44jerks the entire freaking meal. No way. 100% not. You'd be like, Woods, this sucks. This is terrible. Hey, Woods. Yes, sir. I'm from Texas. Yeah. I've been here for about 15 years. When I first got here, I thought the same thing. I thought, oh my gosh. I'm sorry, dude. Now I've gone back and that food, when they drizzle Velveeta on it and call it Mexican food, it does not count. Queso. That's their queso. You will grow into it. I promise you I won't. This is like legitimate Mexican food. We're right by the border. This is where it comes. They make the tortillas themselves. I'm telling you. You know what? It's delicious. It's snot. M1 Dozer. It's snot. It's snot. Go ahead, Dozer. Hey, so I don't know what the deal is with this guy's girl, but I know that with my wife, it had nothing to do with the personality of my friends when we first met. It was just a jealousy thing, you know. And she admitted it later on. She was like, hey, listen, I knew that sometimes I couldn't see you because you were going to go hang out with your boys. And so I don't know. I don't know. It could be the same thing with this girl. It's not that she really cares what his friends are like. She just wants his attention. I actually thought of that. I actually thought of the whole factor of the jealousy thing. Because the jealousy thing plays into, sometimes it plays into the relationship.

3:21:06How old are you? I'm 27. How old were you when this was an issue? We're 20, 21, 22. It's a maturity thing. And I do think that women and men, they grow out of that when you get to be in your late 20s or early 30s. And sometimes people are mature when they're in their early 20s. But that sounds like a maturity issue. maturity issue. But I will also say this. I think that if you hang out with your boys all the time, this would be unpopular with some, but if you hang out with your boys all the time and you get into a relationship, I don't think that it's bad or wrong to not hang out with the boys as much and to spend

3:22:06most of your waking moments with your girl i think that that's entirely appropriate and i think that when guys get um really upset about it i think that that shows a lack of maturity and i mean if i was i had a buddy now in my 30s and he found a girl and he wanted to spend all his waking time with her i would in my head go that's dude Good for you. Good for you, bro. You're married. You have three kids. That's way different than being like 25. I guess. And losing your boy for eight months because he's up some girls, you know. It's like, come on, dude. Where you been? Where you been? He's been with a girl. You're a boy. Yeah, you missed your boys. You're a boy. All the guys that are going to be here for you when she kicks the crap out of you or it doesn't work out, we'll still be here. Well, I'm so glad because that's why you're my boy. And I'll see you in that eight months or whatever. It's a week. I'm with a girl. It's weak. Yeah, I'm a girl. It's weak. She got girl parts. You got the boy parts. Mikey didn't say he has to drop them all together. No, you're not going to drop them all together. But it happens. 99% of the talk. That's not what he's saying is right. Doesn't that seem kind of like, I don't know, like, Woodsy, that's what girls do. We just heard it. We just heard girls go, you're not spending time with me. Right. Doesn't it creep you out when guys do that?

3:23:34No, dude. I'm a full. You're like, I'm a man, bro. I'm hanging with my girlfriend. I'm hanging with my boys. We're out at the beach. We're out at the bar. We're having a good time. I know. That's great. I'd rather, like, kiss her. Okay, Sally. Well, we'll see you, dude. No, no, no. Forget your boys. Sally would be me and you cuddling on the couch. I don't want to cuddle with a guy. I want to cuddle with a girl. Yeah, but you also get to a point, too, I think. Guys don't want to go to the bar all the time anymore, and they don't want to do all those things anymore as much. Right, but I'm talking about in my 20s. Yeah. You know, I lost a lot of dudes to girls. Never saw them again. I haven't talked since. I can hear Woodsy right now, back then, saying, oh, okay. I guess that's what it's like then. Yeah. That's what it's going to be. It's going to be like that? Great. Forget your boys? Okay, great. 100%. Hey, you know what?

3:24:34I've done it. I've done it too. I've done it too. Of course. It's a girl. It's a girl. What's it? You're 34. I am. You ever been checked for, you ever got the prostate deal? No. Me either. Never will. See, that's what I'm saying the same thing. I'll do it for the show. It's the only way you're going to get me to do it. Four years for me, buddy. What? Say what? In four years, my doctor says, get ready. I thought that you were supposed to already have it done. No, he said 50. Oh, good. That's 16 years. Dude, I thought it was after 30 you're supposed to get checked. No. Well, we'll talk about it next. From the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. We begin in a world of consumer banking needs, but travel to another dimension. A dimension of secure, fast and easy ways to make deposits through ATMs. Of no longer having to fill out deposit slips or use envelopes. You've just crossed over into the Chase Zone.

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3:32:31Hey, I got to give Woods the heat, man. Mexican food is here, man. This is where it's at. Absolutely. Dude, the point I make is this. Now, tell everybody what you had last night, Woods. Okay, well, first. That you said was delicious. First, let me make my point. I'm not saying I won't grow to like it. I like Tex-Mex better. Because why? It's what I know. Now, the hamburger was created in Germany. But we, in America, have perfected the art of the hamburger. So you want to get the real thing? Yeah. Go to Germany to eat it. Yeah, and I can understand that analogy if we were in Germany, except you're in San Diego, which is one of the biggest cities in the United States. You know, it's here in America. But we actually have good Mexican food because it's next to the border, and it's very authentic. It tastes real good. But you may be right. Why don't you tell everybody what you had for dinner last night, Pally? So I went to Ralph's. And I got myself a taco kit. Old El Paso taco kit. Old El Paso. Old El Paso taco kit. And I'll tell you something. It was delightful. You slayed it. And I had six of them. You slayed it. Oh, no. Oh, yeah. No. Have you ever been to Tacos El Gordo? I have not. I've had a couple of different Mexican food. He hated Fidel's, dude. I didn't like Fidel's. I liked Mama Testa's, but...

3:33:53The only thing I would change different about Mama Tessa is I like flour tortillas. They do not use them there. Because why? Authentic Latinos do not use those. Dude, Paco de Gordo, change your freaking life, dude. And I'm telling you, when they interrogate terrorists, if they don't like Mexican food, that's a sign. I love it. Thanks for the call, dude. It's M1Berry. Get M1Berry. I'm telling you. Mexican food in San Diego. And when you go. That's what you want when you come back. Zero percent. Got to grow. Got to grow to love it. You will. It takes a little time, but you will grow to love it. I promise you. So I thought that dudes were supposed to get checked for prostate 30. No. I get this text message. I get this text message from M1 John, and it says, Mikey, I think your doctor may be trying to get in your pants because that's why he told you 30.

3:34:55Wow. What is the actual age? That's M1 Dozer that said that. What is the actual age that you're supposed to get tested for your prostate? Well, Jay is right. It's supposed to be 50, but now there are these new guidelines that are coming out from the American Cancer Society basically saying they're urging doctors to... really inform all patients about the risks and benefits of getting prostate cancer screening done of any kind around the age of 50. Because what happens is a lot of times people will come in and they'll find, you know, some sort of a tumor or something in there and they'll diagnose them and these tumors and they have to do all this treatment. In where? What? What? What did you say? She said they'll find something in their body. In their body. You want to do the news, buddy? I'd like to see you do it. Seven years old. I can read off a piece of paper. We know that. You read everything off a piece of paper. Anyway. What is the age? I'm upset with him right now. Why? I'm trying not to be. I did Tiana's job for a day. I'm trying not to be. I had a heart attack. I was trying to be crass, and nobody got it. I got it. Thank you. Well, I said in their body.

3:36:07Is what I meant. I'm sorry. They say 50, but basically a lot of people that go in and they get the screenings done, they're not aware of the repercussions because sometimes if a doctor finds a tumor in your body, then you have to do treatment and you're diagnosed. And a lot of times the tumors may have, they would have never suffered any side effect from the tumor at all. So they do a lot of additional work. You know, for something that may not have even been an issue. Yeah, it's guy stuff. You have to have the screening for the prostate stuff. They say more than a million U.S. men are diagnosed with tumors who might have otherwise not have suffered from any illicide effects. That is, by the way, the uncomfortable exam, right? Yeah. Dr. Jellyfinger. Yeah. I don't want it. I don't either. But it's important. It's not a jellyfinger. It's a long camera. Oh, God, really? Yeah. A camera? Yeah, you have to swallow the stuff. Barium, it's called, I think. It's long and drawn out. Really? How long does it take? I don't know, but it's not cool. I thought, hang on a minute. That's not the standard exam. Absolutely it is. Yeah, they run the camera. Absolutely. On the standard? Mm-hmm. Absolutely. Standard 50-year-old, get it done.

3:37:21Really? I'll go, but we have to all go together. Yeah, can we go as a group? Can we go for the show? Yeah. Women don't even have prostates. No, no, no. Women don't have to. No, the guys. Can you just come with us for moral support? Can you drive us? Because they're going to have to put me under. I don't want to be in the room. Yeah, we're going to have to go under general anesthetic. Yeah, it's going to be one of those deals where they're going to have to put us out completely. You guys don't even understand. Girls have to do this stuff every single year. I don't want to hear about it. Every single year. Stop being babies and go to the doctor. I can't believe what you guys have to do. You guys have to do some crazy, crazy, crazy things. If I was ever to have to get in one of those stirrup chairs, I'd pack my bags and run. Pass out. You don't want to mess with your health. I am so self-conscious. Do you get real self-conscious when you have to go do those things? Yeah. No matter what, you're never fully comfortable. First few times, it's like, oh, miserable. Do you have some cocktails before you go? No, you just have to do it. Do you just think, you know, it's part of life. They see everything on everyone. You're going to have to give me a roofie colada before we go in. No kidding. No kidding. Shanna had a very, very nutritious dinner last night. She prepared for her husband. She prepared Fruity Pebbles. Oh, my. And Frosted Mini Wheats. I did. Frosted Mini Wheats were for me. They're my fave. It's pretty awesome.

3:38:45I'm a good wife. He's stoked. I'm a great wife. I've never had Fruity Pebbles in my life. That's ridiculous. He loves them. They're amazing. I don't like any multicolored cereal. I don't like Fruit Loops. I don't like Fruity Pebbles. What kind of a person are you? I don't like multicolored. Authentic Mexican cereal. Tell me your goji cereal. I like Frijolios. It's bean cereal. That's right. No, I... Let's... Yeah, what was your favorite cereal as a kid? The Pebs, dude. Pebs? Gotta be the Pebs. Fruity Pebbles? Yeah. I like... I just call them the Pebs. Lucky Charms. No way. They're so good. Multicolored cereal. No way. Wouldn't touch it. Never had it. For me, it was Captain Crunch. Crunch Berries? No. No. Get those things out of there. Amazing. I like the original Captain Crunch, too. Lauren O'Brien.

3:39:46Peanut Butter Cat Bean Crunch. Oh, really? I thought it was going to be like naked shredded wheat. Yeah. No, I was, my parents gave me junk food growing up, but. You didn't go through like fields of heather and cut down, you know. Once I educated myself is when I decided to. Have the kombucha. The kombucha cereal. Yeah. Yeah. You know the other one I loved is Honeycomb. Oh, yeah. Honeycomb, honeycomb. Me one, honeycomb. That was good. That was good. Jay, what was your favorite? I like me some Frosted Flakes. Oh, yeah. I love them. They're great. They're great. Got a box at the crib. You do? Mm-hmm. You know what the thing was with the Cap'n Crunch? I preferred it soggy. When you guys get cereal, when you pour it, you add the milk and everything, do you get your spoon and push each of the cereals down under the milk? Yes. I do. Every single one has to go under the milk. I put barely any milk in mine because I hate milk. Oh, dude. I hate milk. It's got to be milk. I buy milk. Now I buy the skinniest, smallest one they have, and I make mac and cheese a lot. So I literally end up throwing away three quarters of a carton of milk every week.

3:41:01Really? Milk is really good for you. Every single week. I hate it. How much do you put in a bowl of cereal? Like a little dollop. I put a dollop of milk in. That's strange. Why even do it? Yeah. It's delicious in the cereal. Really? What kind? Do you do whole? Whole. Whole milk? No. I use skim. Gross! Skim is fat-free, right? Yeah, it's like water. It's white water. It's milk-flavored water. That's disgusting. I can't do that. What do you use? Half and half? Oh, dude, I want it right out of the teat. Mark that down, please. He gets the D. No? Whole milk. I mean, if I'm going to drink milk, I'm going to drink milk. You know? We have whole milk because we had a bunch of Todd's groomsmen staying at our house. And there's so much whole milk. I went and got the one percent. I get the one percent. I don't. See, that's the thing. The reason that I drink whole milk is because I never drink milk. I never drink it. And so if I'm like, I don't have cereal. I don't have. So if I'm going to have something that will involve milk, it'll be whole milk. That's foul. Really? It's not. It's so good. Have you ever dunked an Oreo in whole milk? Hello. Never. Oh, dude.

3:42:12My dad used to make me finish the milk in the cereal bowl, and here would be me at 10. That is unnecessary that he made you do that. Unnecessary. Why would he do that? Because he doesn't like wastefulness. Woods still has the mark from the .40 caliber on his forehead. You drink that milk, all right? You finish that bowl. Mr. Woods, that's a little over the line. That's true, though. That's like warm milk. I mean, would force us to. 570-1949. M1 Ron. Yeah. Back in the day, the 70s. Super sugar crisp. It was real sugar. It had it in the name and everything. What was sugar crisp? I think he had it for breakfast this morning. That's right. Sugar snacks? Sugar snacks? Like honey snacks? Okay, yeah, sugar smacks, dude. With the frog? Yeah. Sugar smacks look like little ticks. Ew. What is up with that phone? Todd likes the smacks, too. Yeah, the sugar smacks look like little ticks. They do. Like barley. Yummy.

3:43:29Yeah. Yeah, the barley. That's what they look like. They look like barley or like hominy. It's like cork. It looked like hominy. It was like Minuto cereal. Those are the beans that Mike ate in his cereal. That's right. Let's see. Woodsy, we got to go hit some golf balls, man, because we're going to be golfing in three weeks. When are we going? I don't know. But we better think about thinking about it. That's what we do. And I guess I can go today. Yeah, we think about it, and we're like, yeah, yeah, we should think about that at some more at some point. Let's see. Let me do this. I have a pretty shocking story about three teachers in L.A. that have been suspended over Black History Month. I'll tell you about it now. You're listening to The Mikey Show. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. For over 80 years, USAA has served the financial needs of our soldiers, veterans, and their families. No matter where you are, you can handle your finances anytime with our secure online banking. From free ATMs nationwide to mortgages and cash bonuses when buying and selling your home through USAA's real estate program, USAA Bank provides a full financial suite of banking services. And if you qualify, you can even deposit a check using an iPhone or computer scanner. You've given a lot for your country. Making it convenient to manage your finances is the least we can do for you. If you have ever honorably served, let us serve you.

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3:51:57And something really, really cool is going to be going on today here at FM 94.9. The San Diego Radio Broadcasters Association and the radio station are going to observe a moment of silence today at noon for Chelsea King. And it's going to be followed by music dedicated to Chelsea, which I think is so, so cool. Definitely a community kind of thing. I dig it. Yep, I do too. It's going to happen today. Very weird, shocking story out of Los Angeles. About three teachers who have been suspended. Why, Sienna? Well, they're teachers at South L.A. Elementary School, and they were suspended for allegedly encouraging students to celebrate Black History Month by parading around the school playground holding pictures of O.J. Simpson, Dennis Rodman, and RuPaul. I don't get it. I don't, I mean, there are three of them. All three teachers were white, and the superintendent at the... in the area said you know it was just disrespectful they were pulled out of the classroom and they've been suspended um without any pay we don't know how long they're gonna be suspended for but they think it was you know they're gonna find people that have negativity towards their name you know yeah and so i mean for sure yeah this is just coming out but sienna has five foods that you're supposed to eat every day you should eat every day any guesses michael some green i mean you're supposed to bacon

3:53:19Bacon, yeah, definitely. Probably In-N-Out. Donuts. Donuts, I think probably high up. Icing. I think between Lauren and Jay, they could guess all five. Yeah. Are eggs on there? No. Almonds? Nuts are on there. Why nuts? Yeah, why? Oh, fiber. Yep. High in natural fiber. High in natural fiber. Look at you. Yeah. Is it their omega fatty acids or their protein? No, it just says their natural, yeah. They're natural fibers. Jay? They're very good for you. Digestive process. Turn your mic on, pal. Come on. I was working on it. I love the gentle nudging. The gentle nudging may be my favorite new thing. Come on now. It's like he's talking a squirrel out of its little burrow. Come on. That's how I talk to my dogs. Come on. Well, I can hear you, but I've got somebody else in my other ear at the same time. It's like Jay's living in a tree house, like a little hole in a tree. Come on, Jay. Come on, buddy. You guys come up for a while. It's great up here. Any guesses, Jay, on five foods you should eat every day? Nuts is one of them, so you have down to four. Oh, stage one baby food. Miss Hillary, what do you think? Hillary. Hillary's pretty healthy. One of the five foods.

3:54:30There's yogurt on there? Yogurt is number five. I love yogurt. I know why. Why? Because it's got a bacteria in it. Cultured enzymes. It's healthy for you. Probiotics. It prevents osteoporosis. It improves your digestive system. And they say make sure you check the labels list for active cultures to make sure you're getting healthy probiotics. That sounds filthy. I know. We have nuts and yogurt. Some kind of, I'm sure. Yeah, you're right about a green. Fish. There's leafy greens, so I'm going to give that to Mike. Leafy greens. Fish. Salmon. Not fish. Not fish. There's no meat on here. Oatmeal? Whole grains. Whole grains. Whole grains is on there. What is that? They said that whole grains actually flattens your belly by reducing fat storage in your lower abdomen region. So does not eating a bunch of fat. So you know what sounds good? What? Is an almond and lettuce sandwich on whole green bread. Yeah. Sounds amazing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure. We have one more and I don't know if anyone's going to guess it. Probably not. Say it. Onions. Really? I love onions. They say that onions reduce symptoms of asthma and the risk of developing stomach cancer. Sorry, my pacemaker's going off. Is that your beeper, dude? It's my heart. Whose beeper is that? I don't know. It's Michael Shannon. Oh, it's our printer. Is that Michael Shannon backing up? It's our new printer. Oh, our new printer's working? I'm not getting a cig on my beeper. Oh, wow. I love that we have a new printer.

3:55:50I'm so excited. But anyway, onions, they say the stronger the onion, the greater the health benefit. Really? So just to sum it up, leafy greens, nuts, onions, whole grains, yogurt. Eat them every day. You'll be good to go. Wow. I'll bring them all five tomorrow. Do you guys ever go over to the Henry's and make yourself a salad over there at the Henry's? No. No? What's your problem? What's the problem? Talk to me. I don't like the idea of it sitting out all day and people sneezing on it. And you grow your own lettuce, so. Yeah. And you grow your own lettuce. No, I would like to. You would? Yeah. Would you like to have a garden? Yeah, I'd love to. I could see you having a garden. Why do you think? Because every time I see it, it looks all nice and fluffy. It doesn't look like. She's out on it. She is skeeved. Bacteria pool. No, man. Have you ever had hearts of palm? Yeah. It's delicious. I always steal the hearts of palm from the salad bone. You do? Nobody sees it? I'm just going to come out right now. Yeah. She, the other day, yesterday, she stole a little chocolate-covered gummy bear for me, and she gave it to me. I did. She stole it? Yeah, she goes, Mike, try this. And I go, eh, you know, I don't know. It was from my candy bag. And she's like, no, no, try it. I have the cops knocking down my door. That's right. Yeah. And what did you think of it? I liked it. Yeah. I didn't think I would, because that just seemed so weird.

3:57:06Put a gummy bear and chocolate. It's weird that you like gummy bears and chocolate? Yeah, I don't like gummy stuff. They're good. Jay liked them. Too great taste. Gummy stuff weirds me out. Sienna turned me on to the milk duds and popcorn combo. I can't get enough. Really? Amazing. She's a great seatmate. She woke up from her nap and fed me some candy and then went right back to sleep. I did during Sherlock Holmes yesterday. Hillary, what do you got today? What's going on? I'm going to play that new Mumford and Sons. Mike's favorite. I love it. Yeah. Red Fox used to be in that show back in the 70s. It was great. That's right. Fred Sanford on that. With Lamont. With Lamont. And I think they might be coming to San Diego sometime within the next few months. You didn't hear that from me. All right. Screamy Trees and Vampire Weekend because I've kind of had them stuck in my head. Yeah. Yeah. Nice. I don't know. I'm winging it. What do you get at the theater? What's your favorite snack at the movie theater? Popcorn, extra salt. Not a lot of butter. Really? Salt. I am a salt fiend. Salt it up. But I do grow my own lettuce. Do you? Organically. We have a backyard garden. Me too. I can't forget the avocados that Mikey brought. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You like avocado, Hillary? Love it. I will eat a whole one plain. Really? Yes. A little garlic salt. All right. Lovely and talented Hillary is up next. And...

3:58:29Tomorrow, we're going to do Woods of Wisdom. Now, if you'd like to ask Woods for some dude advice, just go to MikeyShow.com. There's Woods of Wisdom right there. And we'll have a brand new feature with that tomorrow. And a whole lot of other stuff, too. So make sure you're here. Mikey Show's out. Hey, Lincoln Financial Media Station. Mikey in the morning. About the music all day and night. 94.9. It's about the music.