The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 03/24/11
Thursday, March 24, 2011
San Diego State basketballElizabeth Taylor tributeRebecca Black and FridayChris Brown interview falloutconnected car technologyradio comedy bitsscience experimentsnon biological parenthoodmikey showwoodshuskyaztecs
The Mikey Show turned San Diego State's game against UConn into a running gag, culminating in Woods wearing husky ears and taking airsoft shots whenever he missed a college-mascot question. Lauren unpacked the paid origin of Rebecca Black's Friday, while Mikey, Woods, Sienna, and Jay argued over Robin Roberts questioning Chris Brown about Rihanna and his subsequent outburst. Mikey also imagined a fully connected car, staged an Urban Survivor parody in a doctor's office, and watched Jay make hot ice during the Old Man Does Science bit. The longest argument came from Sabra's dilemma: Mikey said her boyfriend should prioritize his new relationship, while Lauren, Sienna, Jay, and callers argued that the girl he raised still deserved him as a father figure.
What happened, in order
Husky Hunting
Mikey's crew announces that Woods will dress as a husky and face a mascot quiz as their comic pep rally for San Diego State's game against UConn.
Remembering Elizabeth Taylor
The show marks Elizabeth Taylor's death with clips from Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf and her preferred epitaph, then jokes about her friendship with Michael Jackson.
How Friday Happened
Lauren explains that Rebecca Black's family paid Ark Music Factory $2,000 and that Black chose Friday over a love song she considered too adult.
Chris Brown Walkout Debate
Robin Roberts says Chris Brown knew she would ask about Rihanna, prompting the hosts to argue over whether her questions crossed agreed talking points and whether his smashed window proved continuing anger problems.
The Connected Car Prediction
Mikey predicts cars will wirelessly sync music and put email, Facebook, and video on a windshield display while Lauren and Sienna argue that the idea would dangerously distract drivers.
Urban Survivor
Mikey parodies Bear Grylls by treating boredom in a doctor's waiting room as a survival crisis involving stale magazines, weak phone reception, and the menace of nap drool.
Woods Faces the Firing Squad
Woods, dressed as a husky, answers college-mascot questions while Mikey, Lauren, Sienna, and Jay shoot him with airsoft guns for wrong answers, leaving him covered in welts.
The Old Man Does Science
Jay demonstrates a vacuum pulling a boiled egg into a bottle and then pours sodium acetate into a rapidly crystallizing tower of reusable hot ice.
Is He Still Her Dad?
Sabra asks whether her boyfriend should keep prioritizing the daughter of an ex he helped raise, dividing the show over whether parenthood comes from blood and law or from an enduring bond with a child.
People mentioned
MikeyWoodsLauren O'BrienSiennaJayElizabeth TaylorMichael JacksonRebecca BlackChris BrownRobin RobertsSabra
28,145 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
Time to get the ball rolling. And by the ball, I mean the Mikey show. What is the day? Is this Wednesday? Thursday. Thursday. It's a big day for San Diego because of the Aztecs. How about that? Very big day. The Cardiff Duke is dressed up in his Aztec uniform. Yeah, he is. Safe to say one of the biggest days in San Diego sports history. Absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. Top five for sure. Sure. Do you know that if the San Diego Aztecs were to go all the way, it would be the first championship for San Diego ever? Whoa. It's crazy. San Diego has never had a championship. Wow. The closest we came was the Super Bowl. One Super Bowl, right? Yeah. Lost to the 49ers. The 49ers. 49 to something. It was a bad one. Yeah, it was. The Padres were in the World Series in 98. Got swept.
By my bunch. Yep. Real good. Oh, boy. Get out of here. And that was... Insult to injury. Well, you're not going to stop that team. You're not going to stop that team. It's the winningest team in baseball history. You're just not going to stop those guys. All right. That's a true statement. That's a true statement. It's not. It really is. No. They won more games than anybody were World Series. But they've been stopped, right? They didn't win in 2010. Well, yeah. I'm saying the 98 team couldn't stop that team. Ah. Mm-hmm. But, hey. Tony Gwynn batted real good. I'm looking at Woods' musical selections for today and loving them a lot. Weird. Rat, The Tubes, Firefall, Pearl Jam, Merle Haggard, Foo Fighters, John Mayer, The Eagles, Lenny Kravitz, Boz Skaggs, GNR.
Dusty Springfield. I went nuts last night. Dude. I put a lot of time into my musical selections every night. It's freaking good. I would, I think it's safe to say that I'm the program director of our music. Yeah. Here. Yeah. It makes me happy. Yeah. I like to do that. Wow. Thank you, Luke. I'm the Garrett. Buzz Skaggs. Buzz Skaggs. Garrett. Garrett. It's our program director, Garrett. Garrett. If you're curious, he looks like Moby. Oh, boy. He does. Dr. Evil. Dr. Evil. He doesn't look like Dr. Evil anymore. I don't think at all. Like, the only similarity between him and Dr. Evil to me is that they have a shaved head. I look more like Dr. Evil than he does. You both do. But you have facial hair. Yeah. I think he looks like Moby. Yeah. He's shed a lot of weight. He's looking good. Woods breaks my heart to do this, pal. Does it? What?
Well, since you did such a great job with the music and everything, it's kind of with a heavy heart that I tell you what you're going through later today. But we're going to enjoy it, and so are M1s. Okay? Is this a prank on me? No. It's a surprise. It's a surprise. Surprise. I like surprise. Surprise. Was the fact that I put on fake nails and white face and black lipstick and a black wig. That wasn't enough yesterday. You thought, I got to give him a little bit more. Good point. He's got a point there, doesn't he? That's a good point. He's got a point. And when you hear this, Woods? You might wish that you had the black wig on. Really? Oh, wow. Oh, great. If you're wondering why you, because it's so funny. Yes. Well, I like funny. You'll like it. I'm a good sport when it comes to stuff like that. Some stuff I'm not a good sport about.
I'm a good sport about stuff like that. We're not going to make you eat anything disgusting. Thank you. That's literally, or snakes. If there's a snake coming up, I'm going home now. It's not snakes. Done. And it's not you eating anything. Then I am in. Today, the Aztecs are playing for, they're playing in the Sweet 16 today. Man. They're playing the Yukon Huskies. Yep. And we are going to do our own sort of pep rally. Yes, we are. Right here in the studio. We are. And yes, we are. We are. Yes. And the way that we are going to do that is that we are going to go husky hunting. You know what I mean? Can't wait. We're going to shoot dogs? No. No. We'd never do that. We would not do that. We're going to shoot you. Now, here's how it works. We have Adam, our promotion director, providing us with a little cute, some whiskers, and we're going to dress you. Woods is looking at me right now like, really? He's burning a hole through the back of your head. He's burning a hole. Right through my face and through the back of my head. We're going to dress you like a husky. Do I have to go out of here? I'm going to get killed. Nope. Yeah.
Are we going to do it outside? Let's do it in the studio. You can be our Husky Husky. You're going to be so cute, Woods. You can live your dream and finally be a dog. What brand of t-shirt is that? Husky? Hefty? They make tools called Husky. Poor guy. So I'm the Husky. The Husky Husky. Keep saying it. Because you're fat. No. Wait a minute. Wait, wait, wait. Woods, Woods, Woods. No. I'm husky. He's not fat. This would suck. And so I'm going to say, even though, even if you don't know, because we're going to play a game. And I'm going to tell you that even if you don't, if you do know all the answers, I need you to throw a couple. Yeah. Because it will be no fun if we don't get to shoot you. Let us have some fun. What do I have to do? We're going to quiz you. Don't tell him what it's about because he might say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. He'll cheat. He'll cheat. Really? Yeah, I won't tell you. I won't tell you. I'm already the Husky Husky. Not till 8. Not till 8. Not till 8. At 8 o'clock, I'll tell you what it is. And you did grow up part of your childhood in Connecticut. That is true. So we thought that was appropriate. Did you? And then Jay brought up the Husky part. Or did you just focus on the Husky part? Well, we did. I originally was like, oh my gosh, she grew up in Connecticut. It's perfect. And then Jay was like, and he's Husky.
He's a husky. He's a husky. Husky, husky. But I just want it known that I'm pulling for the Aztecs. You are. Yeah, you are. You're just a sacrificial husky. Sacrificial husky. You make a good target. Oh, God. So there you go. Jay. Word of the day. Oh, I didn't introduce the show. I'm Mikey. Yeah, he's Woods, the husky. Great. Don't anybody start calling him Husky. Really? Practice your barking. Oh, my God. Lauren O'Brien is the blonde girl sitting to my right. We call her L.O.B. Sienna is our news girl. She's got her purple scarf on today. It's looking great. Oh, boy. Jay is our perverted old. Creep. Producer. Creepy. Producer. He's 47. Can you put creep on a resume? Yes. Professional creep. Residential creep. It's on there. He's not an amateur. He's not an amateur. No. He's professional. He goes to nationals every year and he wins. He's great. I've got trophies. He's like the head of there. He's on the board now. Yeah. There are creeps in Des Moines that are like, one day, one day. I'm at a conference this weekend. You're welcome to come. He's teaching at the conference. You know.
People are trying to figure out what's his edge. Is it his accent? Is it the pronunciation thing? Most people think it's the accent, but then there's guys from the South that are like, that can't be it because, you know, I got an accent. I feel perverted. I got an accent. I can't touch that guy. That's... Oh, man, why didn't I think of that? You can touch me. They're like, why didn't I think of that line? How does he do it? And our phone screener is Chris. It's crap. It's crap. 570-1949 is our number. Every day. Miguel was looking on Facebook last night speaking of creepy Uncle Jay. And M1 Veronica has one of her neighbors that's apparently really good looking. And she creeps on him from her balcony and stares at him. And somebody made a comment like, sounds a lot like. Sounds a lot like creepy Uncle Jay. She says, well, I learned from the best. This is hysterical. I learned from the master. Guys don't usually think that there's girls checking them out from a balcony. Yeah. Oh, there are. Oh, wow. LLB. Wow. What? Just watching basketball practice real good. Saying there are balconies out there with women hunting. Prowling. Creeping.
Just checking things out. 415 tonight. Yep. Is the game. 415 in Anaheim. I wonder. I want to hear from people that are going to the game. Yeah. That'd be pretty cool. Call us. 5701949. Let's talk about the first game tonight out west. Big East Tournament champion UConn still on a roll. Facing second seed San Diego State. Yeah. Who could have a decided home court advantage with the game being played about 90 minutes north in Anaheim. Jim Calhoun ready to face off against the Aztecs and Kawhi Leonard. Team with a lottery selection. Jim Calhoun. And they've won a ton of games. So they're a very good team. We know that. He has a look on his face like he could care less about San Diego State. And this is going to be the easiest thing we've ever done. He does. You know, we're looking forward to playing them tomorrow. It's like, I don't even know where we're playing. It doesn't matter. We have a game tomorrow? I think it's tomorrow. All I know is that it's San Diego State, so what do I care? I'm not kidding you. Like, I'm being genuine. That is my observation. You know, 7.15, whatever your psychic clock says. Look, I don't write the time. I show up for the game. I don't know. What do you call it? I don't even work anymore. I might as well be there when the game's over. They're in the celebration.
They're very, very good rebounders. This is Steve Fisher now. They run as well as any team we will have played. That's respect. He's showing respect. Absolutely respectful. The other side. The complete opposite. I like that, though. I want them to challenge us and think, you know, we do better. Well, they are. You can see that from Calhoun. He's like, get some, dude. Show them what's up, San Diego. Tomorrow. Who is it? The gymnasium. It's a high school team we're playing. Superstar. Kimba Walker. That's a tough combination to deal with. And you can end it with they're playing as well right now as anybody in the country. Come on, San Diego State. Why don't you get some tonight? Come on, San Diego State. It'll be fun tomorrow if they win. Holy cow. And if you have any extra tickets, I do want to go. So just throwing that out there. And if you're black. That would help. If you're one of the players, that would help too.
Just throwing it out there. Creep. Service to the show. All right. You creep. What? I'm trying to do like a street bit. She comes back. She doesn't have any audio. She's like, I forgot the recording. I couldn't get anybody. I got some drawers. Some drawers. Some drawers. Three players didn't show up last night. Three. That's awesome. Wow. Let's see. So the Aztec games tonight. And then. Most people know this. We announced it yesterday when it happened. And if you didn't watch the news last night, you're hearing it for the first time. But I can't imagine no one knows that the news about Liz Taylor, that she passed away. Yes, she passed away yesterday morning in L.A. after suffering from a heart problem for the last six weeks. She's been at the Cedars-Sinai Medical Hospital and her family was by her side. But just, you know, we lost someone iconic yesterday, Elizabeth Taylor. This is her in Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf. For a while, Daddy really thought that George had the stuff to take. They did act differently back in the day, didn't they? Did you hear his voice? Wait a minute, Martha. Yes. Acting sounded different. Wait a minute, Martha. And we both thought that naturally... Stop it, Martha. I wouldn't go on with this if I were you. Oh, you wouldn't, would you? I wonder if real fights back then sounded that way.
I wouldn't do that if I were you. I wouldn't do. Yes, you would. Yes, you would. So anyway, I married the SOP. I had it all planned out. First, he'd take over the history department. Then when Daddy retired, he'd take over the whole college, you know? That was the way it was supposed to be. Getting angry, baby, huh? That was the way it was supposed to be. All very simple. She was gorgeous. You know what's funny? She's probably 22 years old in that role. She sounds like a 65-year-old woman. She's arguing with a 25-year-old man who sounds like he's 70. Yeah, same. Yeah, same. This is Elizabeth Taylor in 1999 talking about what she wanted on her tombstone. Have you ever thought of what you wanted on your tombstone? Yes, every minute of every day. What a weird question. I almost said pepperoni and sausage. Something she's using a blow dryer, though, to answer. Yeah. You think that...
Do you think that Barbara Walters ever asks questions that she can use later? Like the producers are like, make sure you get a death question. Oh, my God. Because she'll die and then we'll want to play it back, you know? Who are you interviewing? Who are you interviewing this week, Barbara? I believe Wayne Staley. Oh, make sure you ask him like, hey, if you ever died of an overdose, what would you want your tombstone to say? Can we get Wowie King in here? Yeah, let's talk to Wowie King. Wowie, you're getting into your twilight years. You're old. You're very old. If you were to die, what would you want the world to know? And tell me that, let's get a queen cut of it. A queen? In twee, two, one. I would, no, wait, Wowie. There was a little bit of me at the very end of that. So I'm going to ask you and then pause three seconds and say what you would say when you're dead in three, two, one. I would know where we know. Here lies Liz. She lived. No, I don't like Liz. I hate that name. Well, here lies Elizabeth. She hated being called Liz. Interesting.
That is interesting. Didn't know that. Well done. Well done. That's a good one. That's a keep-all. Keep-all. Oh, what a freaking break I just got. You revealed that you don't like being called Wiz when you die. I can exploit that. All these news reporters were always saying, Wiz. Taylor. And I'll say, wait, wait, wait. Wait a minute. Elizabeth. Let's see. This, you know, she was a big Michael Jackson friend. Very good friends. Really good friends with Michael Jackson. This was her during 93's Michael Jackson. I have suffered and dealt with the same kind of medical problem now afflicting my friend Michael Jackson. What was the common... How did it happen? How did they become friends? I mean, here is one of the most beautiful starlets of her generation. They were approximately 420 years age difference, yet they were the closest of friends. I think it's just big stars. Sometimes when you're a really big star, you just relate to another really big star. When you kind of get forced into hiding because of how famous you are. This is Michael calling Liz.
Picked up the phone list. Yes, hello. Hey, are you watching Webster right now? As a matter of fact, I am. I knew it. This is my favorite one. Would you like to come over for a Manhattan? When they go to commercial, I'll get in my helicopter. Okay. And I'll fly over and have a Manhattan. That's lovely. But don't make it with alcohol. Ah, that's the only way I know how, darling. I want a virgin Manhattan. You sure do want a virgin. Beat it. You know I don't get that joke. I am not a virgin. I don't even know what a virgin is. A virgin? Yeah, that's when a drink don't have alcohol. Ah, I see. So I'll get in the helicopter, my personal one, fly my butler over, and then you make me a virgin Manhattan, and we'll watch the rest of Webster. You bring your butler with you? I'll bring him with me. Okay. All right, then. Hee-hee. Hee-hee. Good friends to the end. Because of that and because of our friendship, when Michael's doctor called to ask if I could help, I was glad to intervene. I traveled to Mexico City where I saw for myself that my... Real Mexicans living in their natural environment. Now, I am here to report to the world for the first time ever that Mexicans do exist and...
Eat something called Tartillas. Prosperate need of specialized medical attention. Because of my own experience with addiction to prescription medicines, I was able to make a number of calls in search of the best and most appropriate treatment for Michael. And he is now... That Mexico can offer. ...going such treatment in Europe. I will only... Four people. I mean, really? I can't get a little bit something for that? The best money can buy, I said, you bunch of monsters. In freaking Europe. Hello? Michael. That's it? Two of you? Creeps. Pete, that I am a friend of Michael Jackson's, and I love him like a son, and I support him with all my heart. Yeah. Gorgeous.
M1 Rebecca from Kearney Mesa knows how they developed a friendship. Go ahead, Rebecca. Hi, good morning. Good morning. I heard on the news yesterday of his concert. She was at his concert and walked out. Michael Jackson called. He had walked out of his concert. Said the reason she had walked out was because she had poor visibility. And apparently, three-hour point became... Imagine that three-hour phone conversation, by the way. Holy cow. I'm telling you, I left because I couldn't see. I don't know what more I can say. We've been on the phone for two hours. Listen to me. I said, I'm sorry. I heard you. I'm not mad. I'm telling you the answer was, I couldn't see. Just listen to me. Stop yelling. Darling, I'm not yelling at you.
I'm saying I couldn't see. There's nothing else. I've got to go. It's been two hours of this. Do you think that they ever had to go in the bathroom while they were on the phone and get all echoey? And it's like, Elizabeth, where are you? The reason she couldn't see the visibility is because all the marijuana smoke at the Michael Jackson. Yeah, that's huge. You didn't know that. Yeah, really? At Michael Jackson, they just smoke out like crazy? Hot box the whole place. I know that there were 720,000 people at the concert, but I saw you leave. That's wild. I was singing bad, and I saw you walk out during bad. That was bad. How did you notice me, dear? Because. I had on my Liz Taylor glasses. Now what that does is it makes everyone in the audience invisible except for Liz Taylor. So I saw her when you left. Weren't you wearing white diamonds, darling? Yeah, that's your... My fragrance. Yeah, your perfume. I was wearing it. I could smell you. How crazy is that? You could smell me and I could see you. I had on my Michael nose pinchers. You had on your Michael Jackson nose pinchers. Yes.
That's these nose pinchers that you put on. And the only person you could smell is Michael. Me. Michael Jackson. And you were like, there he is. The best thing that they did was when I would sneeze, I would sound more like. Like I do. You go ahead. I go. I sneeze. Thank you, Rebecca, for that story. Thank you. That's just terrible. All the people in the audience are like, oh, that's Liz Taylor. She's walking right out of my show. A lot of times when there's a star at the show, they tell the performer beforehand, oh, guess who's here? Right. And so maybe he knew where she was. Keeps looking down at her empty seat, just freaking him out. He's like, what the hell? Where did she go? That B got up and left. In the middle of my show. S-O-B.
I think she left. Right in the middle of everything. Who do you think she is? Liz Taylor? Yeah. Who do you think you are? Liz Taylor? Hang on. Stop everything. Stop. Where are you going? Laboratory. No, you're not. Going to powder my nose. In the middle of Smooth Criminal? I need to put white diamonds on. No, no, I changed my mind. Stop it. Stop it. No, just walk out like that. It's distracting. And see your beautiful face. It's not like he was playing the belly up, man. Where you see if somebody walks out.
He played freaking arenas. It was the Coliseum. It was the Coliseum. He noticed. He's like, where are you going? It's like fireworks going off. Tigers jumping over each other. He's like, whoa, wait. Whoa. Tigers. Wait. And then a three-hour conversation about it. That's bizarre. Okay. So I'm really confused about this whole thing. You've heard about Chris Brown storming out of. Good morning, America. He broke a mirror in the dressing room because Robin Roberts asked him about Rihanna, asked him about the restraining order. So he gets mad, goes into his dressing room, throws a fit, breaks the mirror, takes his shirt off, walks out onto the street. Hello, dude. Well, Robin Roberts is now saying stuff that has me really confused. I'm like, oh, wow. Like she joined Twitter.
Because of it. And started saying what the real deal is. And it's going to confuse you. I'll play her comments from yesterday next. Think that guy's ever felt leather on his knees? Think that guy's ever put on a pair of red leather pants? Think that guy's ever bought cocaine in an alleyway? Think he's ever gotten a knot in his hair? Think he's ever bought Aquanet? Yeah. Think he's ever yelled at a manager because there's not enough Aquanet? Do you think he's ever run out of eyeliner? Do you think he's ever blown a paycheck on a weekend in Mexico? Do you think he's ever sprayed on cologne? Do you think he's ever had two girls at the same time? Okay. All right. All right. All right. I didn't need it. I was hoping it wouldn't necessarily. Now I need something to make me happy. Yeah. Yeah.
In my head constantly. I convinced my BFMC, Boyfriend.Commerce, to cover this song. Oh, wow. At his next gig. Oh, wow. That's funny. I would like to do it, but I would like to do it as a ballad. He's going to do it like an acoustic version. Yeah, I want to slow it down and do it pretty. Someone did a fake Bob Dylan impersonation of him doing this song. Oh, wow. That's pretty awesome. It sounds just like Bob Dylan doing a ballad style. It's pretty rad. I need to hear the chorus. It'll make me feel great. Oh, wow. Can I tell you an interesting tidbit about this? Yeah. So, I Wikipedia'd this girl yesterday, Rebecca Black. Did you ever do research? Did you ever just look people up? Yeah, did you ever research that? So, okay. Only Lauren would do that. Of course. She's like, you know I've done that on all of you, too. No, I just wanted to know more of the backstory on Friday. So she didn't write the song. You know, the two people from Arc Music Factory wrote the song. But she had a choice. She had two songs because her parents paid $2,000 for her to do this, like, demo. And she had a choice. It was like, here, this one is about, like, Friday, stuff you do for school. This one is...
a love song. And she thought it was too adult for her, the love song. So she chose Friday. Wow. Isn't that great? It's crazy. Look at her now though. I know. The right decision. She definitely did. I... Would love to see the lyrics of the love song. Oh, me too. I love you so much because you have brown hair. I noticed it when you walked in the room. No, it probably is like, you know, experienced like you've been through a relationship and I doubt she really has, you know. I know, but what if it was the same writers that wrote the love song and they were like, when I look at you, I have feelings in my head that say that. I'm attracted. Do you remember the first time you walked into homeroom? You had tight roll jeans and I thought you were a dork. And then I rethought it later and I was like, he's not that much of a dork. Because I know the 80s are gone, but tight roll can be brought back because it's kind of cool. Then I went home, my mom made me a sandwich and I was like, not gonna tell her about it.
you because I don't talk to my mom about stuff like that and then I wanted to call you just to hear your voice and hang up on you but I thought hey he has star 69 now and then I thought hey I want to kiss him but I don't want to play spin the bottle and sometimes I get white stuff in the corner of my mouth when I get really nervous But then I was like, what the heck? I'm starting to get boobs now. My hormones are starting to do stuff. So then I was like, what if I texted you from my dad's number? You wouldn't know who it was. Three-way, three-way. I'm talking about a three-way. Jenna. Jenna. Jenna. What? What is he doing? I don't know. But that was weird. We're talking about thoughts, and then he goes to three ways. I don't know. You can't control him, but I don't want to control him. You can only help to contain him. He just made the song that much better. I mean, she's 13, right? He's talking about three-way calling. Three-way calling. Yeah, three-way calling. Party line. Yeah, there you go. Can I tell you one more thing? Conference calling. Yeah. Okay, one more thing, because I think it's interesting. Okay.
So her friend is the one that told her, hey, if you want to get like a song made, you should check out this company, Ark Music Factory. Yeah. And so her friend is the one that originally told her about it. And now she's like completely blown up. And her friend's like. Yeah, cool. Perfect. Anyone want to hear my song? Is her friend a musician too? Yeah, and her friend is the one that was like, you know what you should do if you want to be a singer? You go to this company and they'll produce a song for you. They're known for working with preteen girls. That's what they're known for. So anybody could just go to them and do this? And all the people in her video are friends and family. Really? Yes. That's cute. Except for the rapper guy who's like 40 years old. Yeah. Lori's research this. So for $2,000. Well, wait a minute. This is kind of fascinating. You can be any kid. And if your parents got two grand, you go to this place. They'll give you a song.
And they'll film a video for you that you can put on YouTube. I don't think any kid. No? I think they have to see a shred of talent. But what they said to her was like, look, don't expect to get famous from this. Like, we're going to make a YouTube and your friends and family can see it. And consider it a stepping stone. Yeah. But, like, don't expect, you know, this is not a promise of anything but that. Yeah. She's a cute girl, too. I mean, that helps. She's sweet. Hang on a second. My one-and-a-half-year-old son, Luke, is on the line. Hi, Luke. Hey, I need two grand. It's daddy. It's not mine. I'm asking for money. Daddy. I need $2,000. For what? Because I want to do a song with ARK Foundation. What's it called? ARK. ARK. ARK Kelly. ARK Kelly. ARK Kelly. ARK Kelly. ARK Music Foundation. Let me hear you sing, Luke. Can you sing? I've got lyrics and stuff now. Well, I got this morning and grabbed my first smoke, had some coffee with a shot of Jack Daniels. Did you just hang up on him? I hung up on him. Mike, that's your little boy. Of course. If he's going to be like that, if he's going to act like that, I'm not going to hang up on him, though. I'm not going to entertain that. Wow, that was harsh, Mike. Kid's got to learn some manners for crying out loud. It was like a parody. He was joking. Yeah, he's trying to write music.
I think he's calling back. Uh-oh. Listen, if you're going to behave... Just hang up on me? Yeah, if you're going to behave that way... You sound a lot like me for a minute. You can give me a money order. You can give me pesos. You can give me a check. Listen to me, Luke. Luke, how are you going to get the money to them if I give it to you? Let's say that I gave you... I'll take a meeting. You're wearing diapers right now. You're wearing diapers. You're in a crib, yeah. You smell like doo-doo right now. You smell like doo-doo because you have a dirty diaper. There's baby powder on your butt. You have poo-poo. I don't have poo-poo. Yeah, you do. You have poo-poo. You have poo-poo. You have a binky in your mouth. Yeah. You have desitin ready to go if you need it on your bottom. What? What are you going to do? What are you going to do? What are you going to do? Does she have your allowance? Do I have to go to her? Yeah, you would have to go to mom. But first of all, call her mom. It's not Rebecca. It's mommy. Mommy snaps your T-shirt between your crotch. Yeah, that's true. Don't worry about my crotch. You have a onesie. You don't even wear pants. What is this song going to be about? You know, just, and it's really about the angst of growing up a half Mexican, half white guy. That's ridiculous.
He's so sweet. He's trying to get out there and be a star. He's got a little bit of a lip, but I think he's gone somewhere. You probably said inappropriate things on the radio before, too. I wonder where he got it from. Not when I was a year and a half old. He's got the right attitude for show business. He's a tough kid. You've got to be tough to be in show business. He's a sweet little guy. All right, well, here is Robin Roberts talking about the controversy with Chris Brown. Now, apparently Chris didn't break a mirror. He broke a window. Oh, so why is everybody so upset? Yeah, don't freak out. No bad luck in that. Well, this is what we were saying yesterday. We were like, you know, first of all, for him to get that mad, they would have had to say to the producers or to Robin Roberts, hey, listen, don't ask about Rihanna. And she broke the rule. Ask about Rihanna. But here's what Robin Roberts said. Yesterday, Brown tweeted a series of very positive messages telling his fans he loves them, saying he was humbled by all the support he's received. Yeah, I got a few tweets myself. I love how it was your second day on Twitter, Robin. And all that happened. Thank you, Andrea. And you know this. And David. Thank you for letting the world know that I'm a complete nerd.
You know, caught on to everything that everyone else has. Thank you for that. You probably don't even know what Facebook is. Yeah, you're a complete loser, Robin. Second day. Anyway. What kind of cell phone is that? It's got a big white rubber antenna. It's a flip phone. A few tweets myself. I love how it was your second day on Twitter, Robin. Thanks, Kathy. Call out. You guys do it to me all the time. Yeah, you don't tweet. I know, but it's the same thing. Yeah, Sienna doesn't even know her password on Twitter. I remembered. It was safe. Thank you, Andrea. And you know. Thank you, Andrea. It was freaking great. And David knows this, that any time we have a guest here on the program, that we let them know ahead of time the subject matter, the topics that we're going to discuss. And even right before the interview, I said that to Chris. And I was shocked like everybody else because we've had a wonderful relationship. I've spent time with him, as Andrew pointed out in the piece. She also pointed out in the piece that it was my second day on Twitter, and that was cool too, Andrea. At his home, he was very gracious.
And we had a very easy conversation. And you saw me laughing during the interview because when he was doing that, I thought he was joking about some things because of the easy relationship that we have. And I'm glad that we've extended an invitation. We'd love to have him back and that he's seriously considering that. So according to Robin Roberts, he knew what they were going to ask. He knew she was going to ask about Rihanna. He was fine. He said, sure. He probably didn't want to and went, yeah, yeah, sure, whatever, whatever. And, you know, because he didn't have the gonads at the time to say, no, I don't want to talk about that. The things that she's saying to him in the interview that usually stars hear about before the interview, so they're prepared are called talking points. Yeah. And he said that she went beyond the talking points. Happy birthday, Chris. But he's apologized. He wrote, first of all, I want to apologize to anybody who is startled in the office or anyone who is offended. Yes, I got very emotional and I apologize for acting like that. Yeah, you didn't just get emotional, though. Well, she's like Robin Roberts. I mean, let's call it what it is. She's lucky she didn't get her fat lip.
What? Oh, my gosh. You know? I mean, hey. What? You really make a big deal about it? It's not like he's still hitting women woods. Or windows. He hit a window. It sounds like he's still got anger problems for sure. Bat thrower? Yeah, you punch things all the time. Oh, look at the daggers. That's in the heat of competition. Does that mean you'll hit a girl, too? No, I've never hit a girl. Well, you can't compare breaking a window to hitting a girl. Can't you? Anger issues. He still has anger issues, for sure. Oh, I'm not saying I don't, but I don't beat women. He probably read Woods' tweet to him and was like, Ah! Cheesecake! Cheesecake! You can't defend a guy that beats up women. There's no defense. Zero. This is not about beating up women. This is something you're guilty of, which is anger issues. I mean, I'll throw a bat in a baseball game, but I'm not going to beat up a girl. I'm not going to... Actually, I'm not going to... He didn't beat up a girl yesterday. Oh, man. He's got a history. He's got a history. That's not what this story is about. It's about him having anger issues. He's made anger issues. Yeah. But he didn't punch Robin Roberts in the face. She's lucky. Because the cameras were rolling. She's lucky. Oh, my gosh. You guys. Punk ass. Just perfect. Sometimes you have to forgive.
I forgive him, dude. It doesn't mean I've got to be a fan of him. So every time he makes a mistake from here on out, you're going to go, gosh. That's a big mistake. Wife beater. Wife beater. 100. How many times have we ever heard anyone else destroying the set of Good Morning America? They're like having coffee and donuts. It's not like they're raging out. Well, but you can't just. She dug. She didn't. She did not dig. She dug. She didn't. She goes, have you seen Rihanna at award shows? She wasn't supposed to talk about it. That's pretty weak. He overreacted, of course. It's not weak. She told him she was going to ask that. She didn't tell him. He didn't know. He went there to promote the album and she brought up Rihanna, which you're not supposed to do. Why do you guys love Chris Brown so much? I don't. I love Chris Brown. You have a Chris Brown fan shirt. Jay has his shirt off and he has his hair bleached blonde. I'm going to break this window. That is true. And you know. The other thing is that you do have to – the interesting point just came up. You do have to decide who's telling the truth. Yeah, that's the thing. If, in fact, she said, hey, Chris, I'm going to ask you about this. Then she did. Then he got mad. He's the D. Why would he get mad if he knew – Why would he beat the crap out of Rihanna? He has anger problems. He obviously has anger problems, but he wouldn't have agreed to it if it was going to upset him. Yeah, I mean –
But I don't think she's going to get on the air and be like, listen, I laid it out for him that I was going to ask this. She's not saying that. It went beyond the talking points is what's been said. I don't think her questioning was out of line. It wasn't that bad. Well, but it was if he didn't know it was coming or if she's not telling the truth. Has that ever happened to you? What? You interviewed a celebrity. They asked you not to talk about something you did anyway. Have you ever done that? Yes. I can tell you who I did it to. Who? I did it to, who's the bass player from Alice in Chains? It's Mike Starr or Mike Inez? Mike Inez. Yeah. No. No, it wasn't the bass player. It was the main guy. Lane Staley. Jerry Cantrell. Jerry Cantrell. I did it to Jerry Cantrell backstage at Coors Amphitheater. Interview. Yeah. And he didn't like it? No. He walked away from it. They told you. They told me not to do it. Yeah. And I said I wouldn't. And then it was the first thing I did. Really? Yeah. They said, don't talk about Lane. Oh. And I said, don't ask about Lane. Really? Who is the D, you for asking or him for walking away? Me for agreeing to not do it. She's saying she didn't agree. That's what she says. She didn't agree, but it wasn't in the talking points.
Yeah, but you can go outside of the talking points. What's the point of the talking points? Talking points is to prep him. It's a loose idea of what we're going to talk about, but it's not like, oh, I can't go outside. You played the clip yesterday, and you could tell how nervous she was doing it because she knew she wasn't supposed to. Yeah, she was nervous. Probably because his knuckles were getting white, and he was knocking his arm back. And he wrote her a note that said, I'm going to hit you. No, he didn't. He was shadow boxing and she was like, all right. It's a great song. I like that autotune sound. No matter if people forgive him or not, he's never going to be what he was. And that's, I mean, worth, you know, he shouldn't. And he's not going to have that fame anymore. Because of what he did. The word of the day is flan. All right. Now that is a Mexican dessert. Delicious. Yes, but not. I just call it dessert. Now. When you hear me work that into a sentence between now and 10. It's the one Spanish word you know. Yeah. Correct. Of course. Well, any food. That's why I put it in there. Yeah. Yeah. It could be the most exotic Mexican food ever. But as long as it's food, I'd know it. Trace leches. You're on board with that. Yeah. Oh, that is good, though. That is so good. It's creamy cake. Moist. Don't say that. Whoa.
Anyway, when you hear me say flan between now and ten, Caller9 gets a hoodie that's got little earphones that you can plug into your MP3 player. And also, you will get a four-pack of tickets to the Nationwide series. Speaking of MP3 players, when we come back, we'll pull the curtain back. Oh, boy. Tell you a story. Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. More, more, more, more, more. Seconds, please. I wonder if years from now people will listen to a best of of the Mikey show and be like, I think that guy ever had a fresh burrito in his mouth. Do you think that kid Woods ever sucked down two eclairs in the morning with a VP? Do you think that girl ever snuggled up to a pillow and pretended it was a black guy? A hundred. Do you think that guy's ever chowed down on a bear claw? Do you think that girl's ever put on a D-sized cup bra?
Yeah, in seventh grade. They didn't come until later. Think that guy's ever seen a picture of his daughter and freaked out over it for a second until he realized it was his daughter? And then felt like a complete dirtbag? Think that guy ever killed his boss? You're insane, Mike. You mean because I was doing air flu? Air flu, yeah. It was... Air jazz flute. It was very happy. Sienna couldn't look at it. She was like, I can't even look at that. She had to turn away. Weirding me out. Was that flute or was that piccolo that you were doing? I think it was more piccolo. I think so. Definitely more piccolo. I'm telling you, man. Somebody needs to bring back the flute in rock music. It'd be hysterical. Would you call this rock? That's what this was. At the time, this was. Now it's known as soft rock. At the time, this was rock music.
You think these guys weren't doing cocaine and getting groupies? They were. Real good. They were, yeah. Smoking grass. Yeah, taking the pot. Yeah, doing the pot. Doing hallucinogenic type things. Yep. Sienna, what's going on in news? Well, did you guys hear about this crazy incident at the Reagan National Airport yesterday morning? I did not. This happened around midnight. between 1 a.m., midnight and 1 a.m. yesterday, and two planes, an American Airlines flight and a United Airlines flight, are trying to come in to Reagan National Airport, and they had to land without an air traffic supervisor because the guy in the tower fell asleep. So here they are on a commercial flight, two different planes trying to get in, and they had to land on their own because of this guy sleeping. They kept calling in and calling in, and no answer. They did, however, speak to an air traffic supervisor. supervisor, or not the supervisor there, but it was another controller at a different airport that could help. But still, the guy at the tower of the airport was asleep. And so now they're saying, you know, never again is there one person allowed to be in that tower. There should always be more than one person at all times. And apparently, before it's happened that the traffic controller had been locked out.
not fall asleep but locked himself out of the can yeah and locked himself out of the tower so it's like oh my god maybe they fire him I know I think you should get fired over something like that that's like the number one rule is like hey look you just can't fall asleep don't fall asleep you can read nudie magazines do math if you want do whatever you want stay awake Also, just to give you a little weather update, it rained last night, as I'm sure you know. Weird weather. Today it's going to be partly cloudy. Tomorrow, expect showers again. They're saying partly cloudy over the weekend. And sunny next week. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? There is a very interesting article in this month's Forbes magazine about our own San Diego Padres. Forbes magazine is alleging that the Padres operated last year on a $37 million... budget, along with the $38 million payroll that they rolled out on the field, it took $37 million to run a $38 million payroll. Does that make sense to you guys? Yeah. And if that's true, which Tom Garfinkel is saying, and Tom Garfinkel is the chief financial advisor, and he's saying it's not true, it's not true, he said, I'm not sure where they got their financial numbers, but we lost cash last year in 2010.
If that's true, it's one of the worst managed teams in the nation in any sport. They had a $38 million payroll that took them $37 million to manage. That's what Forbes magazine is saying. Now, whose shoulders does that fall on? Does it fall on the general manager of the team? No, the owners. The owners? The owners, the management group, whoever's running the day-to-day business operations. Now, think about it, though. They built a new ballpark, so they're kind of in debt with that. But still, man, you roll a $38 million product onto the field, and it costs you $37 million to manage that product. That ain't good business. that the Padres took $30 million in revenue sharing last year from other teams, teams like the Yankees, teams like the Red Sox that pay luxury taxes and share revenue. If this is true, it's gnarly, gnarly, gnarly, gnarly for the Padres. Oh, wow. It's just crazy. And then this one I had to play. Listen, I know NCAA women's basketball isn't the biggest sport in the world. When I listen to these clips from the head coach of the UConn Huskies, the women's,
I was dying laughing. Listen to what Gino Auriemma says about his fans, clip three. I'm going to recommend we don't bid on this tournament for the next five years. Because I think we've got a real spoiled group of fans who just assume that we're going to win, assume that we're going to be in Philadelphia, assume we're going to the Final Four. He called all of their fans spoiled because only about 5,000 people showed up for their Sweet 16 match. Listen to what he says about... What they can do to get more fans into women's basketball. We probably have to win more games. They've lost. You know, everybody loves a winner. So I think that'll help. You know, free parking and handouts at the gate might help. They've lost one game in three years. He's being sarcastic. A sarcastic D. I listened to it. I was like, oh, he's not messing around at all. And I'm like, Chino, women's basketball. That's kind of what happens. He sounds so sad. Well. He's hurt. He's sad. I'll go to the game. No, you won't. There's some sports where women can, you know, you watch women's, like, my friend's a professional skateboarder, and I'm like, I can watch all the women in the world go and do that. That's cool. Women's basketball, I'm sorry. I'm going to offend people. It's tough to watch. LOB, if they had women's skateboarding on TV, I don't think people would watch it. They do have it on TV, and people do watch it.
When do they have it on TV? When can I catch the next one? ESPN2, Fuel. Oh. But you wouldn't watch men's skateboarding. You wouldn't watch men's skateboarding. It's on the Ocho. It's on the Ocho. There's certain sports. You probably watch women's figure skating. When, like what time of day can you catch that women's skateboarding on the Deuce? I don't know. Why are you grilling women's skateboarding? I'll tell you why. I'll tell you why. Why? Because they don't show it. Yes, they do. Like two in the morning? No. Are you watching ESPN2 nonstop? It could be on right now. I don't think anybody's watching ESPN2. They are. They are. You don't think anyone's watching ESPN2? People are watching ESPN nonstop. There's a market for it is what I'm saying. They had downhill skiing the other day. I went to Beaumont's for breakfast and they were showing women doing downhill skiing. Yeah, because somebody messed up with the remote control. There was guys there watching it. Can I ask a question and nobody freak out? Would more people watch women's basketball if they had less clothes on? Yes. Like volleyball, girls, people watch women's more than basketball. They have a maximum clothing requirement in women's volleyball. Don't get mad at me, L.O.B. Don't go there. I have to. What? Yes, more people would watch college women's basketball if they played in lingerie. That is a true story.
But I don't know why I have to wear long basketball shorts and stuff like that. And the men's jersey types, it's like, maybe you're cutin' up that uniform. Yeah, if they played in lingerie and they were cute, people would watch more. They would watch more. There was a clip yesterday of the Sweet 16, the women's. Those courtside seats, empty. And I mean empty. And it looked like a high school gym to begin with. It looked like a high school gym. And I'm like, And I said, we were watching, and I go, you know who that is? It's their family. Yeah, the family, the grandparents are like, oh, God, I did this good today. Good Lord. I want to stay home and watch Matlock. I completely agree with that. I'm just saying there are some women's sports out there that I enjoy. That people watch? Yes. That you enjoy? Yeah. You're a woman. And I see other people watching them, too. You play ball like a girl. I will watch women's softball because you know why?
I can't do what they do. See, and who watches that? I do. I can't do what they do. Underhand pitch. They throw so hard. I couldn't hit off those girls if I had to. The only women's sport that I think people really watch is gymnastics during... The Olympics. And I'm fascinated by that. Tennis, volleyball. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll watch some tennis. Figure skating, skiing. Tennis. Figure skating out. Tennis, volleyball. Yeah. You won't watch a volleyball match. And I'm not saying me. I'm not saying me. I don't watch any of them. I'm just thinking about people. Because you can always tell what people watch when big networks put them on during primetime. Because it's all about money. Like, if people will watch it, they'd put... paint drying. If people would watch it, they'd put it on. So you always know what's popular if it's on TV. Well, there's niche channels where people will watch women do the skating, the surfing, the skiing, snowboarding, stuff like that.
I don't think there's a niche out there for women's basketball, period. That's what I'm saying. And for him to get mad and be sarcastic like that, I thought it was hysterical. I was like, what do you expect? WNBA doesn't do well. Terrible, terrible. Why would he think that? Dude, WNBA. It'd be like it's their finals and stuff, and it's like the last game. We saw it. Not that many people there. No, there's like 2,000 people there, maybe. They're not interested. It's sad. The girls are good. They are good. They would whip me. They're fantastic. And I'm sorry that it's not more interesting to watch. I'd rather watch dunking and black men play basketball. Me too. Me too. It would be fun to watch the girls play against average guys like Woods. Oh, my God. That would be funny. That would be interesting. It would kill us. M120 is on the line. Are you there, 20? What's up, guys? What's going on? We didn't like pants over there. That's right. Love this guy. All right, look, they would watch basketball. We would all watch women's basketball if they were cute, if they were in lingerie, and they can dunk on each other. The dunking is huge. Shorten the goals. That's what he said. Yeah, shorten the rim. Aren't they shorter and the balls are smaller? Balls are smaller. Jay, don't. I know you're going to. The balls are smaller, but I don't think. You said that. I thought that they were lower. I think the rim's still 10 feet, but the balls are smaller. There aren't any.
We just said go there. Thank you, bro. Dip it like a poop. So I was talking this morning off the air before we came on the air. I was saying I will – I see the future. I see where technology is going because I'm into it. And you know how people put iPods in their car? Yeah. Okay? Cars that are coming out now. have these ipod connections where you plug in your ipod yeah well people love it okay they got it in every new car that was number one of the number one things i was searching for right now i didn't know that but anyway and we'll get to that but i was uh saying this is what they need to do they need to they need to have it so that if you download a song on itunes in your house it automatically shows up on your iPod in your car. And you can control it. If you have four iPods for different things, like maybe you have an iPhone, maybe you have an iPod, you can say, well, I want it to be on this one, but I don't want it to be on that one. You can click on it, and you don't have to plug it into your computer to put it on there. You can manage it all from your computer, but your iPod could be in another state. And I said, L-O-B.
Do you have an iPod? You said, do you have an MP3 player? Which is even more insulting. Like an iPod? I think he said, do you even have? Do you even have? Which is even worse. Do you even have an MP3 player? That was it. Just like that. And she looked at me like I asked her if she brushes her teeth. You are on one with me today. Wait a second, young lady. You're on one, Mike. You're a tornado. How dare you? I said, wait a second. L.O.B., she didn't have a TV. And she goes, well, but I have an iPod. And I go, I bet more people have TVs than have iPods. I do have a TV. I have a flat screen. Now you do. It had to be bought for you. But I don't have cable. By your BFMC. That's right. And I watch movies on it, but I don't watch. I think there's a lot of people out there that probably don't subscribe to cable. Four of you. Yeah, but you didn't even, you didn't have a TV, you didn't have cable, so I didn't think it was, which was fine. But I work out. I understand, but if you didn't have a television, I thought, well, maybe she's not really into... I've never seen, like...
Woods, I've seen his iPod. I have an iPhone. I've never seen you with anything like that. I've never seen any of your guys' iPods. I've seen Woods. How? He brings it in every once in a while, and I got an iPhone, and I mess with my iPod on there. Yeah, but you don't have your little earbuds in. No, the earbuds right there, I've used them. But iPhones have a built-in iPod, so you know whoever has an iPhone has an iPod. Yeah, that's just a given. I kind of understood where Mike was going. What? I was like, come on. No, you did not, Sienna. You don't have cable. You don't have a TV. She works out and runs on the beach all the time? You think I just whistle while I run? You whistle jingles? No. Well, no. I mean, now that you say that, I'm like, no, of course you have that. What can I use your iPod for? Like eating and stuff? Competitive eating. No, I had my iPod for when I used to work out. I probably had an iPod before. That must be an old one. I bet you didn't. When did you get your iPod? 79. I'll tell you. Steve Jobs. Let me tell you. When I was on the old show, and I remember we were in this, it was in 2004. I had one before that. No, you didn't, because that's when they were coming out. No, they came out before that. They came out in 2003.
So here's the deal. First generation, my friend. First generation. Yep. The big fat ones. Yeah. Woods. The Woodses. Yeah, they held like five songs. No, they held more songs than that. But here was the deal. It was an old show, and it was in 2004, and I saw the cover in Newsweek, and it had a picture of Steve Jobs, and it was talking about this new product called the iPod. And I came in, and I talked about it on the air, and I remember everybody on the show, the old show, was like, Who cares? That doesn't even sound interesting at all. And I was like, you guys, this thing can hold like 75 songs on it. I had an MB3 player in college that played, that held like 20 songs on it. I had one that I put Michelle Branch, Vanessa Carlton, and one other song because it could literally hold. That one was called the gay pod. Yeah, it was the gay pod. It had fringe on it. All right, I'm going to ask you this. Yeah. Do you want to stand firm on your 2004? No, I want to stand firm on 2003. Okay, L-O-B? When the iPod came out. Correct. I want to say 2003. I would stick to that. It's probably 2002. Maybe 2001.
Oh, really? Yeah. The first iPod designed and marketed by Apple launched October 23rd, 2001. Yeah. Well, I didn't have it then. Did you, Ellaby? I had one right out of college. So 2003, probably. Yeah. So you did. You had it before me. Because I didn't find out about it until 2004. And as soon as I found out, I wanted one. I, in my opinion, it's the greatest invention ever. The greatest. And why would you think... That you didn't have one? Yes. Because you didn't have a TV. And you're kind of frugal. Yeah. Not with my music. Music is like number one for me. You have had a broken cell phone. It's about the music. You've had a broken cell phone for like a year. But I don't care about my cell phone. I don't talk on the phone. She doesn't call people back. That's just how you are with electronics. Sometimes L.O.B. will get mad at me for things I don't know about her and she'll be like, you idget. How did you not know this about me?
You don't even know me. It's like I don't even know you. I think I've even talked about my iPod several times. Running on the beach. And I even said when I was looking for a new car, like, why don't they make all of them with the iPod docks? That's true. All right. I was a little. You don't listen to me. A little. I was a little off. But you have to kind of see where he was. No. I mean, I'm just saying I can't see. You better reject. I don't see where he was. All right. And if you knew me at all. If I knew you at all. He knows you. We all know you. I didn't own it. You don't know me. Now, about this thing that I'm saying, though, how great would that be, right? That would be great. You don't have to deal with taking your iPod in and out or whatever. Yeah. I say get rid of the iPod altogether and just get a hard drive. Dude, he's right. Yeah. In your car? Forget the iPod. Oh, yeah. Forget the iPod. Oh, yeah. Now. Apple will still make money, and this is how they'll do it. Because, you see, iPhone, iPod, Apple is in cahoots with a lot of car manufacturers. So what they do is they go, all right, we are Apple, and we will build something into your car. We don't want people breaking into your cars looking for your iPod. We don't want your iPod hanging out in your car. We're going to build in an Apple device into your car that will...
automatically sync up all your music, sync up all your stuff, podcasts, the Mikey show, get in the car, the Mikey show's there, and I'm sure FM 94.9's like, really, dude, with that? Question. Yeah. I like my iPod. Yeah. I don't want it. I want to have an iPod. Still will. Oh, you will. We'll never get rid of it. You need it for the plane. See, Jay said get rid of it altogether. No, no. Just in the car. So you have a little screen that comes up. That's cool. It could even look like an iPod on there, so you're still scrolling through it. You get rid of it from the car. I got it. They're going to have to hurry up, though, because Pandora is trying to get into all of GM's cars. That's true. Pandora is a musical thing that is like an internet deal. But imagine having it. Here's where it's going. Think about this one, CNR. See, but Sienna's not really... She didn't do much on internet at all. She doesn't do anything on a computer. I don't really care about this stuff. Guys do. Guys love our gadgets. Imagine this. Imagine you're driving and a head-up display comes up and you still see the road. You're looking at the road, but you want to check your Facebook. So you're like... Oh, please. But you still see. All right? Now you want to check your email. You don't even take your hands off the wheel. It's all voice activated. So you go, Facebook.
Facebook comes up in front of you, head up display. You can see right through it. No. You see right through it. What if it reads it to you? It should only be read to you. No. Why do you need this while you're driving? This is ridiculous. Why not? Because it's distracting. If it's safe, why not? No. It's safe. No, it isn't. Don't make it safe. What if it's voice? What if it's voice? Why is everything getting so out of control? What if it's voice? What if it's Mikey goes Facebook? Woods, you don't want voice. Why? I'll tell you why. Because the experience of Facebook is not. It's audio. It's visual. So sit down at your computer. I want it while I'm in traffic. Wait till you get home. I don't want it. You have an addiction to Facebook if you're wanting this. It isn't just that. It's not just Facebook. It's also, okay, so now I'm driving and I go, email. And now my email comes up. Are you that busy? And I go like this. I go, reply. Oh my God. You can do that. You can do that from this phone. It's voice automated. People want to see it. It's all visual. No, you're the only one that wants to see it. No. Dear L.O.B. I saw this new iPod that I'm driving right now. I saw this new iPod I think you'd be interested in. Send. Why do you need to see it? Why do I need to see it? Yes, it's email. People like visual. You're the only one that needs to see their email while they're driving. If you guys think I'm nuts, fast forward the tape. Ten years from now, I'm guaranteeing you, the new Dodge that comes out will be...
Head-up display. Fully integrated for your music. Fully integrated for your life. I will lobby against it. I'm just saying, like, what happened to having an excuse? Like, sorry I didn't get back to you. I was in the car. Sorry I was taking a nap. Now they're going to be, like, going into your dreams while you're sleeping. I'm dating your Facebook. Don't you guys think? Leave me alone. But how do you guys not think this is great ideas? It's not a great idea. I'm in on it. It's going to drive people further away from ever having a conversation. Yeah, go get a cup of coffee. Yeah. I'll just Facebook you. I'll Skype you while I drive. Oh, it's nuts. You guys say that. I'll Skype you. Do you notice this? I hate all of it. Do you notice this? I'm going to get rid of everything. The very people that go, I don't want this to happen, are the same people that are driving the machine. L.O.B. says that she doesn't want Facebook on her windshield yet. I'm perfectly happy while I'm here at work in front of my computer, while I'm here, Facebooking. Now, I don't need it while I'm driving. I need to concentrate on the road. Yes. Just wait, because soon BFMC will be posting pictures of you and he.
Snowing in the snow. And you can see those photographs up on your windshield. I can wait till I get home. But you don't need to. I can. Then BFMC will send you virtual roses. And I'll tell him he's a cheapskate. Your husband Todd. No, he doesn't even. Go on Facebook. He hates it. You're driving down the road. I want to punch you. And all of a sudden, you see on your windshield a heart. And it says, you have a message from Todd. First of all, he wouldn't do that. He'll tell me he loves me when I get home. And I'm happy with that. And you say, open. And it's his voice. And it goes, I love you, babe. And she would say, greetings. You know what? He can just call my cell phone now and just say, I love you, babe, if he wants. He can send a text message. Why do I need a virtual heart on my windshield? I like it. It's insane. You do not. I do too. You do not. I love Facebook. So many more accidents are going to happen. No, you'll see through it. It'll be translucent. It won't be a distraction at all then. Head up. Head up. It's coming.
I can't wait. It's coming. That is meant for trained professionals to do the head up. I'm moving to the desert. Not Joe from Escondido. Oh, it's coming. I'm going to lobby against you. Me too. I'm going to join a committee. I'm going to protest. Yeah, me too. We have a new urban survivor. It's coming up next. You realize by doing this, Mike, Rebecca's been like, you didn't send me a heart on my windshield. You knew I was in the car. Guys are just. That's more things for you to get in trouble about. You'll have no excuse to ignore us anymore. It's worth it. How about this? Woods is driving down the freeway, and he goes, Yankees score. Oh, my. You can do that already. Then it's a game. Then it's the game. It's the game. Oh, my God. It's translucent. You can see through it. It's a head-up game. You can't watch a game on your windshield. Even if it's translucent, you're going to get an accident. You're an idiot. You can see through it. Yes.
You're an idiot. You go. You go. I would love that so much. You see at it. You go like this. You go. You go. The Bachelor. Your brain is not there right now, Mike. And there it is right in front of you. You can't watch TV and drive. You're getting out of control. Head up display. No. You'll see through it. If a pilot was flying you in a plane doing this, no. There's only one way that it would work. How? Is if the car started to drive for you. Yes. There you go. So then you could just sit back and let the car do a thing. That's coming too. Yeah. Then I'm in. Because of GPS. You're a nerd. You're a gigantic nerd. By the way, I got news for you if you like Fritos and you're probably not going to like it. So here's the deal. I'm going to tell you about why you might be mad about what's happening with Fritos. We're going to dress Woods up like a husky in 20 minutes. He's already dressed up like a husky. Like a dog, a husky. Like a dog. Like the dog. Oh, so a husky. Then we're going to shoot him. Because he's fat. He's not fat. Then we're going to shoot him with air guns. Isn't he? He's just thick. Like a bean bag. And then. Oh, my gosh. Woods is sprawled out like he's fainted. With his belly out. With his half shirt on. His belly comes out at least once a show. Yeah, every day he shows us his stomach. I'm a husky.
You're not a husky. I'm a husky. You're a Pomeranian. Word of the day is flan. Okay. Why'd you look at me like that? Hey, I've sucked down some flan in my day. Don't you want to say flan? Isn't that how you guys say it? No, it's not how we guys say it. So sometime between now and 10, I'll say the word flan. There you go. And caller number nine. Gets a hoodie that has a little set of earphones in it for L.O.B.'s MP3 player. Her Walkman. Her Walkman. Her iPod. Her Discman. Her Discman. Those never skipped. Oh, my gosh. Constantly. Never broke. Yeah, they never stopped playing. Oh, my gosh. You know what's perfect for running? A CD player strapped to your arm. I just remember the...
It opening up in the CD still. Stupid laser thing in there that would never slide up and down. From the inventor of the mobile level, it's like, hey, some things aren't meant to be jostled around. They're supposed to be still. It was a nice try. Great thought, man. Good attempt. But at that board meeting, when somebody goes, you guys, these CDs, things are blowing up. Somebody at Sony goes, why don't we make a Walkman? But we got to get out of the cassette thing. We got to move forward. We got to go to CDs. And people can run with a CD player. Yeah, it was as big as a loaf of bread. It was good when you're on a plane. On a bus. Yeah, I mean, as long as you were sitting, down on a hard wooden chair strapped to it with a desk in front of you with the device and not don't sneeze put the mobile cd player on the table and delicately press play yes it was great you would hit play and stop on those things like you were pushing the button nuclear weapons you're like i'm gonna get one more time come on yes let's give it a shot
This is what it would sound like to be jogging with a seedy Walkman. He almost got it. And he stopped running. Oh, gosh. Here we go. There we go. You know how I know this isn't true for you, Mikey? You'd never be running anywhere. Did you write that down before you said it? Hey, Mike, do you know how I know that this is not true? That happens to be just the way I talk. Do you guys have to, like, script the show, or how do you guys do the show? No, we just, like, come up with stuff. We come up with stuff off the top of our head. No. It can't be. Because I heard Jay tell you you were fat the other day, but he said, wait a minute, Mackie.
I know that cannot be true because you would have never run. It's my professional delivery. He's got a guilty pen in his hand. Yesterday off the air in our meeting, we were talking about messing up words. And I said, oh, you know, I mess up words all the time, Lawrence. Oh, I mess up. We all are saying it. And Jay said, well, I have the privilege of being in the other room. I can turn off my mic and, like, practice what he says before he comes on. Jay, what's the prize of the day? He has already practiced that three times. Today's prize is... Nope, nope. Didn't say that right. Hang on. Take two. Today's prize. And now that's too deep. Today's prize. I want to pull the curtain back now. Can we? Yeah. I'm going to pull the curtain back now. Wait, we can't. No, yeah, you can. Wait, then you can't look at your computer in between the breaks. Oh, you know? I don't know. Oh, we can't because he doesn't know. We can't. This is for what we're doing. Steve doesn't know. Who's Steve? What's he? At 8 o'clock, Woods is dressing as a husky, and we're asking him questions. He doesn't know any of the questions, and that's what this is. Yeah, so we can't pull the curtain back. At 8 o'clock, we'll pull the curtain back on Jay. So there's another? Oh, it's on Jay. It's on Jay. Look at Jay's face. I saw Jay. No, he knows. He knows. I don't know what I did know. He doesn't know.
He doesn't know. Okay, so, Sienna, what's the deal with Fritos? Why are people going to be upset? Well, of course, they're going to jump. By people, I mean woods. Yeah. You'll be upset, too. They're jumping on the health train bandwagon, and they're going to be making chips. Not all chips, but about half of their chips are now going to be healthier. They want to make them with natural ingredients. Apparently, to make a potato chip, it takes beet juice, purple cabbage, and carrots. Frito-Lay is, by the end of the year, they intend to make... Half of their bags included Lay's flavored potato chips, Tostitos tortilla chips, multigrain sun chips, and rolled gold pretzels with all natural ingredients. They're getting a healthy makeover. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Yeah. So you're saying right now they use beets? And carrots and stuff like that? Well, I don't know if they're joking, but they say that in this article from Fox News. I'm getting a cold. I sound nasally. It's not my fault. I didn't give it to you. I'm not saying that, but I feel like I sound nasally. I didn't do it. I don't have a cold. You don't sound nasally at all. I know. Okay. To make potato chips, it takes beet juice, purple cabbage, and carrots. At least that's what Frito-Lay has concluded. Oh, that's what they're going to start doing. That's what they're going to start doing. To make things healthier.
Okay, that does bother me. Kim buys healthy Fritos. You can't tell the difference. Can't? They're organic. Yeah, you can. I'll bet you $100. Well, okay. Yeah, they're not as bad for you. Yeah, they're equally as delicious. No. We'll give them a blind taste test. I'll put $100 on it. Oh, yeah. I'll put $200 on it. Dude, I have killed some Fritos in my day. Do you guys remember when they made the Olien brand that was supposed to be made with Olestra? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Hey, babe. Sorry, I just had a bag of chips. Yes, darling. What's up with those new Lays? What do you mean? I mean, I don't know. Like, I'm cramping. I'm cramping. It says Olestra on the bag. I don't know. Babe, what's Olestra? It's supposed to be fat free. Babe, why do you have the chips in the bathroom?
Hey, hon, don't buy those Olestra ones anymore. Go back to the old ones. But it says Olean. Olean is right here in the title. Well, Olean them at the store. I don't want them anymore. Oh, my God. I don't want any more of those. Disgusting. Lauren. Is Lauren in there? Lauren's in there. Lauren, please. What? Oh, my God. Babe, don't eat those, Lauren. Don't eat those chips. Just put the bag down, Lauren. Walk away. As I use my lips. Don't use your lips to eat those chips. That's your new mantra. Don't use your lips to eat those chips. Are you okay? All right. Asked and answered. Asked and answered, babe. Woods is dying. I'm sorry. Can I get you anything? Say again. I didn't hear you. Her stomach is really rumbling. She's gone mad. We're going to have to send her to the doctor's office where she will need the assistance of
The Urban Survivor. I'm Mikey Grylls. I've never been a member of the British Special Forces. I barely got out of high school with a GED, and I've got no experience except for telling jokes on the radio. I will try to survive in urban situations using nothing but the company's credit card, a car, an iceman at that, my wallet, and whatever things I can find on the internet. You're listening to Urban Survival. Today, I'll teach you how to survive in one of the most boring and mundane places on Earth. A doctor's office waiting room. I'm waiting for my annual physical. And by annual, I mean once every eight years. Autumn has started to pervade. Luckily for me, there are several magazines to stimulate my brain and imagination. Brain stimulation is very important when you're bored. Once. In New Guinea, a chap my age went to see a doctor, and for his annual check-up, he forgot to bring an iPad or an iPhone. Boredom set in, and within hours, he fell asleep. Before he was able to realize it, nap drool was visible on his cheek. He was laughed at, mocked, and became known to staff as Droolhead Bob. Aha. Highlights Magazine is here.
It's too bad I'm not seven. This would really be a great score. This is Cigar Aficionado with John Travolta on the cover. Reading this could quite possibly make me fall asleep, which is the last thing in the world that you would want to do in a doctor's office. Don't forget, drool head Bob. Perhaps research has shown that the majority of patients that sit in a doctor's office must also like cigars. Like the four women and two other hacking men sitting next to me. I've just texted my entire staff on the Mikey show. Unfortunately, the only person to respond was Woods, who was fortunately still at McDonald's. His response? Git. Sienna and L.O.B. rarely respond. Jay's probably skating or surfing or in the wood. Plus,
He prefers a phone call. I'm starting to lose it. I'm glad that my 3G network is picking up a signal. I think I'll just read the headlines of The Onion on Twitter. Mike Esperanza. Finally, Mike Esperanza's close enough. It'll have to do. Until next time, I'm the urban survivor. Oh, yeah. Woodsy, be a husky next. I'm always a husky. Yes. And we're going to shoot you with air guns if you get questions wrong. With BBs in them, right? With airsoft BBs. And you're going to have to answer questions. And we'll tell you what they are. Have you ever heard this one? Nope. Oh, dude. I used to work in 93.5 K-Cub. And I used to put on a little southern accent when I would play the country songs. No, you didn't. Yeah, I did. No, you didn't. Just like this. Sounded just like this.
Did they know you were Mexican? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, I hear you, but don't use your last name. What did you go by? Just Mike. Just Mike. Hey, it's Mike. Mike Jones. Hoss. Hoss. Hoss. They call me Hoss. Friends call me Hoss. Buddy. I actually did use that voice. That's hysterical. That is funny. I'll give you an example. K-Cub. K-double-D-B. Wow. KDDB. Let me give you a little example of what I did, all right? KDDB, what's going on? It's Mike in the afternoon. If you want to hear Joe Diffie, we're going to do it. Some honky-tonk attitude to KDDB. Wow. I don't want to know you. When I worked at a country station, I used my voice, but I may have thrown in a few y'alls. Really? Yeah.
Oh, you have to. I've always wanted to say y'all. Y'all is a great word. I love it so much. I never say it anymore since I've moved here. If I say it, I feel like people will be like, really with the y'all? People have called me out. When I first moved here, it was right after going to school in Virginia for four years. And then when I first got here, people were like, y'all? You're from Jersey, I thought. It's perfect for a group of people. How did you say y'all from Jersey? I picked it up when I went to school because I went to school in Virginia for four years and people everywhere. I mean, it just made sense. My mom will sometimes, sometimes they use or like use guys. So to me, y'all was just better. Your mom. Use guys. She's so Jersey. I love it. Sienna, what's going on in? Well, we reported this yesterday. Now there are more. United States that have found traces of radiation from Japan. Which ones? U.S. states. Well, yesterday I said... It's minuscule amounts, they say. Yes, and it's the same thing. I mean, they're not levels where you would see any danger, but they have found traces of it. So I announced yesterday Washington, Oregon, and California. Now, Anaheim was the closest to us, none in San Diego yet, but now they found traces in Colorado. It's weird, Anaheim. It's all inland. Yeah. That's inland. Why Anaheim?
I don't know. L.A.'s closer to the ocean than Anaheim. I know. Well, Colorado has now joined the list. It's rain. It's probably rain, I bet. I mean, doesn't it have to be? Rain? Precipitation. Yeah. I don't know. Carrion, the radioactive stuff. I don't know. It's probably aliens, if I had to guess. Oh, my God. What if it is? Could be. What do you know? Not much. Well, being about aliens, you don't believe in them. He does not at all. I do. If it turns out to be Aliens Woods, you're going to feel so foolish. I know. I'm used to that, and I welcome that. Also, yesterday was a big deal for Lindsay Lohan. She has rejected her plea deal. Now, she is going to trial, and her preliminary hearing begins on April 22nd. Now, she was being offered a deal, in case you didn't know, in her felony grand theft case, for which they say stole a $2,500.
necklace from a jewelry store in L.A. So she's going to court. If she's convicted, the judge will throw the book at her. Yeah. He'll literally pick a book and throw it. Wow. I am very surprised she turned down the plea. She was going to have to do jail time anyway. Right. Unless she's not guilty. She's standing very strong in that she's innocent. You better hope that tape doesn't get released and her on tape stealing it. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, first and foremost, we want to wish... Coach Steve Fisher from the San Diego State Aztecs. A happy birthday. Yeah, buddy. Happy birthday, pal. Maybe you bring an Elite Eight appearance. Maybe an Elite Eight appearance for your birthday. If you haven't heard, the Aztecs will be taking on the Connecticut Huskies. Oh, boy. Today at 415 in Anaheim. Man, I want to know. I want to hear from people that are going or Facebook me or something. I'm so into that, dude. Going to a big game like that is rad. And then also I reported last week about the Atlanta Braves minor league manager, Luis Salazar. They got hit in the face with a line drive. They had to take his eye out. They did three surgeries on him. It didn't work. So they had to take his eye out. He's back. He's healthy. He's going to let you know when he's returning to action. I got an appointment, a doctor appointment today, 1.30, and they're going to let me know.
Probably in two, three weeks. He's going back to work, and he sounds identical to Mikey, too. Yeah, almost exactly the same voice. I got an appointment, a doctor appointment today, 1.30, and they're going to let me know. Probably in two, three weeks. You couldn't tell the difference. It's like listening to a tape recording of myself. Yeah, exactly. Literally like listening to a tape recording of myself. Exactly. Go vote on San Diego's favorite breakfast place. You have the choice. There's five of them. DZ Aikens, The Broken Yolk, Honey's, The Potato Shack, and Hash House of Go-Go. And M1's are crowning their favorite breakfast place. So there it is. Woods is the Husky. So we are going, you know, we're playing, the Aztecs are playing the Yukon Huskies. And we're going to take it out on Woods right now. You're going to get to hear it. Later, you'll get to see it on Facebook.com slash Mikey Show, where you can go right now and see Woods yesterday dressed as Edward Cullen, kind of, more like Lestat. I was dressed as a Dracula. As a Dracula. And we sent him into CVS, and you can see video of that right now at Facebook.com slash M-I-K-E-Y-S-H-O-W, Mikey Show. You can see Chris getting run out of the store as well. Yeah, chased him out. Chased him right out. Okay.
Are you ready, Woods? Go ahead and put on your little doggy ears. Your husky ears. You're a good sport, buddy. You're going to put on your husky ears? I just call him ears. Because he's husky, get it? Because he's already a husky. He's a husky husky. There you go. Look at how cute you are. He's got little doggy ears. Oh, look at his tail. Look at the cute little white tail. It's sticking straight out the tail. It's so cute. Woods. All right. Oh, you're so sweet. Oh, little fella. Don't shed in here. Who's a little fella? We're going to take turns. All right. We're going to take turns with this, and here's how it's going to work. Woods, we are going to give you the school, and you've got to give us the mascot. Okay? You hear that? That's your challenge. That's what you need to know. He should come out here to the outside mic. So he can shoot him. Well, first he's got to answer the questions, and then if he loses, then he gets shot. What am I doing? I'm giving you the school. You give me the mascot. The team name. I'm terrible at this. You ready? These aren't just in the Sweet 16, these schools. No, they're not. You're a sports guy, so. Oh, perfect. Oh, I should know these. Bring it. Penn State. Nittany Lions. Oregon University. The Ducks. Ohio State.
University. Buckeyes. Yale. Blue. Lube. Yes, lube. No, it is not the Yale Blue Wingers. The Blue Wingers. Is that your final answer? It is not the Blue Wingers. What is it? The Bulldogs. Okay. You should know you're a Husky. Fellow dog. Are we all going to just go at once? Why don't we just all go instead of one at a time? Why don't we all take a shot at it? I thought we were going to yell them off and he was going to have to answer. Yeah, that's what I thought. He'd be over there answering. As he got them wrong, we'd just lay into him. But how about now we just keep track of how many we got wrong and then we'll all get to shoot him that many times. Oh, I didn't know that that's how we were going to do it and I like that idea. We can do it now. Let's do it. Yeah, get over there. Let's all take a shot. You have the list, Mike. You can come over here and you can use my mic. You read them off. You can just come use my mic. Mike. This is a big gun. You read them off, Jay, so that I can... We can do both, can't we? Here we go. Come in. Yeah, I can read them off. Because it's not a piece of paper. Oh, wow. Don't do this at home. Oh, no. Oh, I don't know if you turned that mic on. Let me go make sure. Oh, I didn't. I'm so scared I'm going to hit you where it really hurts because you're wearing sweatpants. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. So Woods is standing against the wall about, I don't know, 20 yards away.
We have airsoft guns. Don't do this at home. Hey, Woods, talk into the mic real quick. Hi, I'm Husky. Hello, I'm Husky. And what's going to happen is that if he gets it wrong, he's going to start running around, and we're just going to try to get him. So he's already got one wrong. Okay, so he can just start moving now, right? And then if he gets it wrong is when we're allowed to shoot. He's already gotten one since we take a shot. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, I missed him. No, we can't shoot yet. We can't shoot. We can't shoot. All right. Why don't we do it like this? Chris? Chris, why don't you? Oh, you're taping. All right. All right. I'll yell him out. You ready? Boise State? The Boise State. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Oh, no. Oh, shoot. Oh, God.
That hurts. All right, you ready? Aim low. Holy crap. Nebraska. Cornhuskers. Yep. BYU. Cougars. Oh, Cougars. Cougars. I'm sorry. No, no. Wait, what? Wait, I didn't hit you. I don't know why I shot. I don't even know why I shot. I didn't get you on that one. I saw it hit the wall. I saw it hit the wall. I'm so sorry. I will not fire next time. Wait, don't shoot. I'm not shooting. Okay, you guys. That was you, Mike. All right, you ready? Holy cow. Are you ready? No. BYU. Cougars. Yeah, yeah. Wake Forest. Demon Deacons. Yes. UC Santa Cruz. Banana Slugs. Yes. Oregon State. Beavers. University of Maine. Oh, God bless. No. No, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Oh, God. That hurt. You ready? Oh, this is the worst bit ever. University of Arizona. Wildcats. Yep. How many more? How many more? Maryland. Terrapins. Yep. Jeez. Boston College. Boston College Eagles. Yep. I'm not throwing any of these. That hurts. You ready? Yeah. Yeah, he's got a pellet mark. Listen, you got girls shooting and what do you want us?
You ready? Aim low. Aim low. Aim low. Aim low. I want to hit him in the... Sweet chariot. He's wearing sweatpants. It's going to really hurt if he gets them. You ready? Yep. Syracuse. Orangeman. Yep. Dang it. Xavier. No idea. Oh, shoot. Oh, God bless. Right in the teeth. Right in the boob. I just pulled my Achilles again. There's only four left. Oh, my God. This is my favorite. You probably are going to know them. You're probably going to know him. Probably. Are you ready? I'm ready. Oh, my God. Georgetown. The Hoyas. Yep. Seton Hall. Pirates. Yeah. Pittsburgh. Panthers. Yes. Only one more left. Iowa State. Hawkeyes. Cyclones. Damn it. No, no. Oh, it hurts so bad. Oh, that is the greatest. Oh, my gosh.
We were all standing holding guns in a line just waiting for him. Oh, that was so fun. Oh, no. You poor thing. It looks like a cigarette burn. Those hurt. Yeah, they hurt. Oh, no. Oh, Woods. He has all these pelts all over him. He's got welt marks. Oh, my God. Woods, he gave me the highest powered one. It's the one that he used against me. Oh, yeah. That thing. That thing. I got shot like four times with those things. Oh, no. You did really good. And I pulled my Achilles again. Oh, no. That was a blast. I feel bad. That was so mean. Do you feel bad? Yeah. That wasn't even the slightest bit fun to you? Yes. If you watch the tape, I'm jumping with glee. Oh, my God. All of you would draw your pistols and hold them while I had the mic in my head trying to answer. And I'm like. Oh, wow, wow, wow. I mean, we've got direct aim on him, and we're like, Seton Hall. Firing squad. I pulled pirates right out of my butt on that one. I know, that was good. Oh, my gosh. You did a good job. Holy crap, dude. He's got a giant welt on his arm. That one hurt. He's got them on his side, on his boob. Yeah, one got me right in the tee, dude. Right in the breast. Oh, my gosh, that was so fun. Oh, man.
She likes my breasts. She likes my breasts. What is this one's name? Can we pull the curtain back now? Yes. With Jay? I hate you. Yeah, no. Good. Get it off me. So the idea was Jay sends us homework. All but you because you can't know. Right. So he wants us to come up with the school of the mascot. Okay? And we all do. But Jay. he's got like the mascot's like actual name. So it's like, you know, Buzzy the Bear. No way. Yes. Instead of like the school, like instead of being like the Duke Blue Devils. The San Diego Padres. Yeah. It'd be like Fred the Friar. Yeah. It'd be like Fred the Friar. Fred the Friar. Albert E. Gator for Florida. For Florida. It's a gator. Yeah. That gator's name is Albert E. Gator.
Didn't even know until I got his email. Al E. Gator. He was the first one to send the email to. He was the first one. So I'm reading it. I'm like, are we supposed to do this? There's no way Woods is going to know this. Exactly. No one would have known that. I guess in fairness to Jay, I had presented the idea as like. Names of mascots. But I thought we all, when we ran through it. Got that it was like the Blue Devils. We understood. We said that a few times. The Florida Gators. We were trying to decide if it was a fair bit. So we were like, you know, could you come up with it, Sienna? Could you come up with it, Mike? Right, right. Yeah. And then we sent the thing out. And I got it on my phone. Yeah. And I saw a couple of them and I was like, what the heck? You're like Albert E. Gator. And he had some obscure schools. And then the last one he added in there was Purdue. And it was. Instead of the Boilermakers. Yeah. Pete or Purdue Pete. And I was like, what? I turned to Matt and I was like, wait, isn't Boilermakers Purdue? He's like, yeah. I'm like, what is Jay getting? Jay would put like, you know, Steve Johnson. He's the Notre Dame. He's the guy that actually gets in the suit. That's weird because I'm such a huge sports fan. I didn't even respond to him. I just ignored him and said mine. It was. Really, Jay? I was dying. He's ready to be the old man that does. Oh, yeah. Let's do it.
Jay makes me happy. Jay's the old man who does science. He's the old man with technology. The old man who does science. Oh, boy. Oh, wow. He just acted like he was drinking a bottle of wine. I don't know. Where does that mic come up right here? Is that it? Yep, should be it. There you go. Hello. Hello, Jay. Jay's on the other side of the room. Now. Is this going to hurt my lungs like the last one? Nope. The last one didn't hurt your lungs either. It did. Just kind of a hypochondriac. All right. All right. So Jay is the old man that does science. He does this every week. It is easily one of my favorite bits ever. And what he does, he comes in here in a white lab coat. Usually he's wearing protective goggles. Today he isn't, which means that today must not. Yeah, this one's pretty safe. Okay. Question. Okay. Tell me the truth. Okay. Has anybody from management gotten on you about this? Oh, for sure. I knew it. Was it? No, that's not why I'm being safe today. But they have. But they have. Garrett, now I have to send Garrett an email. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. And he wants to know. He wants to know. Hey, listen, pal. I need to know what you're doing, all right? They wanted me to sign a waiver. Oh, wow. Yeah, you got to sign a waiver in case you blow your freaking hand off. You don't sue us, all right? Where's my waiver?
Yeah, well, you know. So I sent him an email this morning, told him that I was going to do it tomorrow. But the stuff I'm doing today is so, it's tame. It's super tame. Well, you didn't sign the waiver, pal, so if anything happens, it's not on our butts. So the first experiment I'm going to do, I'm doing for Jasper, actually, because he said, Dad, have you ever seen this one? This one's real simple. It just creates a vacuum. Okay, you've got a milk carton. Oh, wow. A glass milk carton. And the fire inside the glass bottle. There's fire, there's fire. Oh, my God! It just sucks the... Basically, I have a milk bottle that I got when I was a kid. And I put a piece of burning paper inside of it. And then I took a boiled egg and put it on top. To plug it up. Yeah, and it creates a vacuum and just sucks the egg down inside. That's awesome. I love this stuff. I do, too. It's fascinating. And you can hear it. You just heard it go... Now this one took a little more effort. Hey, don't do the egg thing, pal. Freaks me out. This one took a little more effort. First off, I had to find, you know those little packs that when you go to the mountains and your hands get cold? No. You clip a little, okay. Like warm pack? It's a warming pack. It's got a little like iron chip or something inside. You squeeze it and it gets hot real quick. Basically, I found the sodium acetate, which is what they use inside of it.
And I got it in powder, and I spent all day yesterday boiling it down, and it creates a liquid. Oh, my gosh. So in Kim's kitchen, I spent the whole day boiling chemicals in her kitchen. She was really excited about that. So basically, this is what this is. Wait, wait, wait, Jay. So you're telling me that in that bottle right now that's got a screw top on it is the same chemical that makes things hot? Right. Wow. Yeah, and I've had it in the refrigerator. It's called sodium acetate. Okay. Mexicans, great. So what it is, it's called Hot Ice. Okay, Sienna just took her headphones off and is getting out of the way. What is on that plate? Crystal meth. Basically, I did a little test this morning because I couldn't get it to go yesterday. I spent all day trying to get it to react, and I couldn't get it to react. Yes. So I boiled and boiled. I spent all day doing this. Got it. Trust me, it was a long day. So this morning I kind of tested it a little bit, and it went. So I'm going to build an ice sculpture just by pouring this out of the bottle. Okay. What is on the plate again? What's on the plate? Some powder? That's just a sandwich.
Okay. So here we go. So when it hits itself, it's going to react ideally. Pouring the liquid onto the plate. Here we go. Let's see. He's pouring the liquid onto the plate. It's pouring onto the powdery substance. Wow. Dude. It's standing up. It's standing on top of itself. It's reacting to the plate. It's growing. It's growing. It's like a snowman. Yeah. It's like ice. Is that ice? It's hot ice. It's hot ice. Hot ice. Can I touch it? What would happen if you touch it? Come over here if you want to touch it. Here, I'll pour a little water. Will it be hot? No, it'll just react. If you guys come over real closer. No, I'm not touching it. It looks like it's turning into like... If I touch it, it'll react to my body. Oh, gosh. Jay's growing, actually. His body is growing seven feet tall. Yeah, Jay is turning into a monster. Can you see it now? What's it feel like? It's hot, LLB? It's warm and greasy. LLB, put your finger in this one. People have said that about me, but that's neither here nor there. Now it's cold? I see it's reacting to your body temperature. And then the cool thing about it is that we'll continue to do it. I can boil it down again and use it again. Which is what he wants so he doesn't have to get new ones. It's like he's pouring this liquid and it's turning into what looks like a sandcastle. It's the weirdest looking thing I've ever seen. Oh my gosh. LLB's got it on her fingertip. It almost looks like wax. Whoa, Jay.
That is turning into something weird. That is rad. That's kind of strange. Yeah. That's getting... It's like a beer can. Yes. It's the size of a beer can. Well, a can. It looks like it's the shape of a Sapporo beer. Ew, it stinks like vinegar. Smell my finger. I've heard that joke. Beep boop, beep boop. Wide hand. So that's it. That's the old man that does science. That's incredible. Fantastic. You're fired. Can't do those without me. He's the old man who does science. He's the old man with technology. That's enough of that. Oh, that was fun. First, we got to shoot woods, and then we got to watch Jay make a big white thing. And suck an egg through a milk bottle. We're going to read an email from a listener. named M1 Sabra. And I need everybody to just calm down. Sweet butter. Or to me, it's like flan in my ears. But to other people, it's like butter. I'm going to read you this email from M1 Sabra in just a second. Is this going to turn into a fight? Oh boy. Not if everybody behaves like ladies and gentlemen. When does that happen?
Never. Tonight's 8 o'clock album is, uh, hell, it's the Arctic Monkeys. Garrett, Garrett, the Arctic Monkeys. Whatever people say am, that's what I'm not. That's the name of the album. I think he meant to put whatever people say I am, that's what I'm not. Whatever people say am, that's what I'm not. That's a Garrett type. I'm going to discuss this now. Don't freak out. Everybody be cool. Everybody be cool! M1 Rick from Vista. What was the word of the day? Flan. Good job, dude. You just won yourself that hoodie with the MP3 compatible little earphones in it. And also four-pack of tickets to the NASCAR Nationwide Series. Hang on, all right? Hang on. Here we go. The reason I said don't everybody freak out is because we got this email.
And I brought it up to everybody here. And everybody started yelling out what they thought. Couldn't believe it. And you can call about this. 570-1949. Mikey, I've been dating my boyfriend for over a year now. We're in love. Things are great. There's just one issue that we have. And that is that he has a seven-year-old daughter. And she puts daughter in quotes. Now, I put daughter in quotes since he has no blood relation to her, nor has he adopted her. This is his ex-girlfriend's daughter, and he helped raise her for five years. No, they were never married. They broke up almost two years ago. I understand and accept that he loves this child, but her mother is now married to another man, and they've started their own family.
Just had a baby with the new husband, and the daughter calls this man dad. My boyfriend gets to see her and keep her overnight, usually about two days a week. Now, recently he got laid off, and he's going on a trip for almost a month. I get him taking a break, but here's the deal. I'm a full-time student. Typically, I got workloads of almost 80 hours. My time with him is limited. I have a total of three days free I can spend with him before he goes, and I just found out that for three of those days, two and a half of them will be spent with his non-daughter. I can share time with them, but honestly, it's more like babysitting when she's around, and I'm not really ready or willing to play mommy to my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend's daughter. I'd like to spend my limited time with him, not his... And she puts it in quotes.
daughter. Supposedly his time with her is coming to an end, but I don't see a decrease in the time they have together at all. Should I be laying it on him that this girl is someone he needs to let go of and focus on the future with me? It kills me that I'm not the most important person in his life. He talks to me about marriage and making a family, but when I get pushed back in his priorities like this, I hate it. Am I wrong or selfish for feeling hurt? Sadness and fear. When he's chosen to spend nearly all of my very limited available free time with this child and not me before he leaves for so long. I feel like he kicked me in the heart. Thanks again for giving me some input. M1 Sabra. Now, she says hurt, sadness, fear because that's what I call anger. So she's angry. She wants to know if she, you know, she wrong and selfish for feeling anger. OK, so here's my take.
And just for the record, I am the only one I believe with this take. Everybody else feels different. I don't. I never said how I felt. You didn't? I thought you were all on the same page. And L.O.B.'s convicted. She feels both. Weird. That's weird. You're on the fence. I am not on the fence. I know you're not. Nor am I. Yeah, neither is Woods. He's opposed. Few things. Few observations. Don't know all the details, but what we do know is that this man was with this woman for five years. They were together for five years. And basically, they've been broken up for two years, and this girl is seven, which means that he met that girl right when she was having this child. So the baby's daddy, who knows where he is?
Who knows where he is? She was having this baby. This guy meets her and he's like, hey, I dig you. No, that other guy was a loser. He dumped you, whatever. But I'll be with you and I love you and we're together. For whatever reason, they didn't get married. Who knows why? Maybe she didn't want to get married. Maybe he didn't want to marry her, but they didn't get married. They played house for five years with this little girl and he grew very attached to her. OK, well, obviously he grew attached to her. It was like, you know, he was raising her for five years. He was raising her. However, it's important to remember that this is not his child. Not only is it not his child, it's not his adoptive child. Even the fact that he gets, quote unquote, visitation overnight visits like that to me is like weird.
It's weird. Don't worry, you'll get your shot at me here in a second because I got the eyes on me right now. So he raised her for five years and then they broke up. And for the last two years, he's been having this custody of his ex-girlfriend's daughter from another guy that he helped raise. Now, she says supposedly his time with her is coming to an end. Well, that's weird. why would time with her come to an end? I mean, after all, you raised her. You should have visitation rights to that little girl forever, shouldn't you? Is it because he's going out of town for a month? No, it's coming to an end, but she doesn't see any decrease in the time that they've spent together at all. And the reason that I think it's, I'm reading into it, but the reason I think it's coming to an end is she's got a new dad. You know, the dad's probably, the dad is probably like, what's up with the ex-boyfriend and the, you know what I mean? Yeah.
Why is the ex-boyfriend taking my daughter? Because he's now the dad. Right. He's the new dad. The stepdad. The stepdad. Yes. Effectively the third dad. Exactly. There's the biological dad. Exactly the third dad. It wasn't in the picture. It was not in the picture. There's the biological dad. Yeah. There's the boyfriend dad. And now there's the husband dad. Yeah. Okay. So he moves on and now his girlfriend is Sabra. And Sabra's like. What's up with the ex-girlfriends? Well, you know, I helped raise her. OK, but I mean, do we have a future here? I mean, it's kind of weird, you know, like it's kind of weird. Yeah. If this guy did not marry this woman when they were together for five years. Now, I usually put it on the guy because it's usually when a guy and a girl are together for five years. It's usually not usually.
Generalization here. But it's usually not the woman that has a problem playing house and then taking that full time. It's usually the guy that will play house and have a hard time making it a full time gig. So I'm reading into it, but I have to because I don't have the information. But I'm going to guess that he didn't marry her for five years. And then they broke up. Maybe they even broke up because she got tired of his stuff. She was like, you're going to poop or get off the pot? Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. Either that, or maybe he was just like, you're not the girl for me. Or maybe she was like, you know, it just didn't work out. Maybe she was a meth addict. There's a million babies. Yeah, a million babies, but they broke up. I disagree with that. You think what? The dad wouldn't still be with the kid if he didn't want to play house. He would bail. Yeah. So maybe she broke up with him. So it was her. It was her. She broke up with him. Makes sense to me. This is reading into it, but she probably moves a little bit quickly from guy to guy. Like she's a whoa, you mean? No, she might just be a serial dater. A serial dater. Exactly, the words I was looking for. But they were together five years. I mean, she obviously was together with someone or dating someone to have a baby daddy that's not...
Yeah, but five years proves that she's not a serial dater. Five years. And now she's with somebody who she now has another baby with. So it's like she definitely jumps right into one relationship after the next. No numerous people like that. Okay, but I wouldn't call her a serial dater if she was in a committed relationship for five years. Was it committed? Does she leave any... Maybe it wasn't committed. We're reading a lot into it. We're calling her a cheater. He's maybe a jerk. I'm saying that maybe she's someone that she might have some issues and she needs to be with somebody at all times and jumps from one to the next. And she might not. And she might not. Maybe she's the type of person that when she breaks up... She's got to be in a new one. That's exactly what I'm saying. That's a serial dater. I thought a serial dater breaks up with people and never really gets committed. They date. They can't be alone. They're always in a relationship. They're always in a relationship. Okay. Well, she's married now. Yes. Now she's married. That's what I'm saying. She's moving very quickly and moving from one person to the next. And I'm trying to give some more cred to the guy because it seems like maybe he did want to do something, but she was like, I'm not committal and I'll be on to the next guy. Okay.
Well, here's the thing. She's not noncommittal because she's married. And she's not a serial dater because she's married. If you're a serial dater, you date serially. You're not a serial killer if you don't kill people. But this guy, the boyfriend, has told the girl who wrote us the email, Sabra, that they talk about marriage. Didn't she say that? Yes. So he obviously wants to have a relationship and get married, too. So it doesn't mean he's not, you know, committed. Didn't mean for the five years he was with the other chick that he was not getting like pooping or getting off the pot. Right. Means that possibly that girl didn't want to be with him. She was trying to find something better or something different. He probably loved his ex and but then, you know, realized they weren't meant to be together. But he probably had a hard time leaving because of the little girl. Exactly. Could be. Because he changed diapers every day. You can't just bail on someone that you've raised. Right. Now, in my world, you can't just bail on somebody that you're with either. You know what I mean? But they weren't married. They weren't married. I know they weren't. I know they weren't. But you see, there's the weird part. He wanted to pretend that they were married before raising a child together. They both did, not just he. Yeah. Both of them did.
They both wanted to play house. He stepped in and tried to do the right thing. How did he do that? By raising that child. Yes, you're right. You're talking about the relationship. But the issue is the child. Yes. But here's the deal. He wanted to play house. They both wanted to play house. You don't know if he didn't propose. Let's say he did. But playing house is... The way that I think of playing house is acting like everybody's married and doing all the things that a married couple is supposed to do, but not having the piece of paper or the binding commitment. That's what they were doing. I have a piece of the puzzle. You do? Why? Why? Why? I got an email from, how do you say her name? Sabra? Sabra. Sabra. Can't call in, but here's the deal. She cheated on him almost the whole relationship. He tried to make it work out for the kid. They were engaged. Okay. They were engaged. She's a serial dater. That's not a serial dater. That's a cheater. She was cheating on him the whole time. She's a hoo-ah! Relationship, relationship, relationship. She's someone that needs attention all the time. She was a cheater. Well, yeah. And she's now, you know, on a new relationship. Got it. This guy's innocent. Yeah. No, he isn't. Yes, he is. Okay, well, let me at least give my case to the jury. But we just got a piece of the case. Yeah, we did. She was a cheater.
She was a cheater. And they were engaged. The issue is the kid, though. That's what we're talking about. Absolutely. But the real issue is Sabra. She's the one writing in and wanting to know. I can't make out my feelings here. You know, what should I be? So here's what I think. They played house for five years. They did exactly what LOB described. But they were engaged. Can I please? I'm going to beg you. Okay. But you're putting words in my mouth by saying... It doesn't matter if they're engaged. They were playing house. They had the intent to marry. She was playing house. He was trying to build a house. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Were they or were they not living together? I don't know. We don't know. We don't know. Oh, see, I assume they were because they... I'm sure they were. That's right in between the lines. You know what happens when you assume. I shouldn't. It doesn't make it, but I just realized it doesn't make a difference. It doesn't make a difference. No, it doesn't make a difference. Okay. It doesn't make a difference. And Sabra, if you're listening, please email and let us know. Try and call. She can't call. She's at work. Please call. Please call. Please tell your work that you have to throw up outside. You have to go poop. Sabra, you need to poop. We need you. We need you. You think your car might be on fire. May I, L.O.B., may I assume they were living together?
That's a big assumption, Mike. Mr. Attorney, you're not getting one past the prosecutor. I know. You know that. That is circumstantial. It's very, it's assumptive. Very assumptive. The second you get the email, Jay. The court will not allow it. All right, fine. The court will not allow it. If I had to put money on it, I'd say they probably were living together. They probably were. Jay, did you get an email? She has not responded. 5701949, Sabra. Immediately. Please. We should have got her on. And she may have, let me see. She may be trying me too. No, she's not. All right. Even if she isn't, and people are calling, the phone lines are now starting to light up. 570-1949. I am so sober going to call. I know. We want to tie up every line. We want Sober to be able to call. Even if they weren't living together, doesn't change the framework of my prosecution. If they weren't living together. It almost makes the case stronger because he's pretending, you know, this is my child. He's not pretending. He's a gay. I guess it has to be your blood to be your child. No, no, no, no, no, no. What I'm saying is, is that if you're not even living together. Right. Yeah, you're close to the kid. Sure. You're going to have to get to your point quick because I'm going to strangle you. What would you propose that he do?
Proposed? My girlfriend's kid? I don't even live with her. Like, I have my apartment. She's got hers. Yes, I see the kid all the time. I love the kid. The kid's great. The kid loves you. The kid loves you. The kid loves me. You're the kid who helped raise that kid. You're the father figure. If something happened to Todd and I, and... You guys are married and you're together? It's different. Even we went through a phase where we broke up and I still saw his daughter, Jenna. Can I have Sage if something happens to you guys? I'm telling you. But if he gets married, Sienna. It doesn't matter. He would never take Jenna away from me and I would never leave Jenna because for the majority of her life, I have been there and I love that kid. That's it. That's it. I will not go anywhere. That's called cake and eating it too. No, it's called being there for the child. Helping raise a child. She doesn't live with him. Sienna, so what about when there was a time when you guys weren't together, you still saw Jenna during that time, even though you didn't see Todd? Yeah. Did he arrange that? Through both of them. I saw for a while when Todd and I weren't together, he was in Florida, and Jenna's mom would drop off Jenna to me on Saturdays, and I would spend the whole day with her when I wasn't with Todd. We have her? Yes. We got her. M1 Sabra. Hi, guys. How are you?
Thank you for calling in. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for calling in. I know you probably only have limited time. Yeah, well, it's okay. I'm really glad that you guys are talking about this because I've been going back and forth. I feel like a wave, you know, like it's his kid, but it's not his kid, but it's his kid, you know? Did they live together? They did live together. They moved in almost immediately, to be honest. Okay, let me try to give my framework here and then you guys can go on the attack. Okay. And Sabra, we'll have you here. But I got to lay out my case. All right. So they pretended to be husband and wife, meaning that they lived together, they had intercourse, and they pretended to be husband and wife. Oh, I don't know. Sabra, did they ever have intercourse? Oh, my gosh. I'm sure she wants to talk about that. No, but L.O.B. gave a look like, I don't know, Mike. I don't know. Who knows? I'm going to guess maybe they did it. Yeah, probably. Okay, probably. Okay, probably. I'm so sorry, Sombra. Sorry, Sombra. Yeah, so am I. L.O.B. had to make the case that, you know, maybe they didn't. She's like, I'm going to throw up thinking about it. Thanks. So anyway, they're playing husband and wife. We're going to pretend that we're married, but we're not. But we'll live together in the same house. In fact, we'll even raise a child together. I'll pretend that I'm the child's father. And as far as the child is concerned, I will be.
Her dad. That child will know no other man other than me as her dad. Now, we're not going to get married. We're not getting married. Maybe at some point we get engaged. How far into it, Sabra, until they were engaged? I don't really know. I think it was like a couple years in. Okay. So let's say they're engaged for three years. Yeah, we're going to get there. Don't worry. We'll get there. We'll get there. Hey, listen. But in the meantime, we will continue to cohabitate and raise the child together as husband and wife even though we're not. Mom and dad. Mom and dad. Even though we're not. You are. No, we're not because we're not married. You can still be somebody's mother or father and not be married. Did she call him dad? That's what I want to know. Did she call him dad? No. That's the weird thing. Whenever she comes over, she always calls him by his name. She never calls him dad. Okay. So they break up.
which must have been easy. You know, there's no court costs involved in that. You just say, hey, we're breaking up. After all, you cheated. And so, you know, he moves out. I would too if somebody cheated, which is terrible. Now we're divorced. You know, we were pretending to be husband and wife. Now we're in a fake divorce. Well, we broke up. We're in a fake divorce. And so I move out. But man, I miss that kid. I do miss that kid. Now. If you are not living together and you're dating a girl and she's got a kid, you're probably going to develop a relationship with that kid, even if you don't live together. Yeah, probably going to develop a relationship. Now, it's not going to be as it probably isn't going to be. The same as if you did live together because maybe you're not changing the diapers, getting up in the middle of the night, giving bottles, all that sort of deal. But there's still a strong relationship. But what we have here is a guy that became really bonded because he probably was waking up in the middle of the night and doing all that bit. And so now they break up. One of the consequences of her actions of cheating.
Was that now she's punishing her daughter too because this guy that she knew as her dad now has to get out of the picture because he doesn't have a choice. You cheated on me. I can't stay here. Okay, so he moves out. Another consequence is that they were never married. And so legally, he doesn't even have a right to visitation. What he does have is this woman who probably feels guilt for cheating on him, feels guilt because her daughter loves him. And so she lets him go over there or lets the daughter go visit. Sure. Meanwhile, the new husband is probably like, what's with the ex-boyfriend? Sure. And the girlfriend is like, what's with the ex-girlfriend? And the girlfriend is like, what's with the ex? So they're both kind of like, you know. Now, it's all kind of a be different lesson for me in my mind. Because if they went the traditional route, there wouldn't be cheating and there wouldn't be the living together thing. How do you know? Well, because if they went the traditional route, they wouldn't cheat on each other and not be married. I thought you meant the traditional route of getting married and then raising that daughter together. Oh, yeah. No, that's not what I meant. Yeah, because cheating can happen. Absolutely.
He actually, they were engaged and broke it off and then they were going to bring it back on again. And he's like, you know, I only want to marry you if you can promise that you're going to be with me and only me. And she's like, I can't make that promise. He's a good guy. He's a good guy. And he's not leaving this kid because he doesn't want to hurt that kid. Yeah. Well, guess too late. And it isn't him that did it. It's her. So he should punish that little kid. No, no, no, no, no, no. The little kid's going to be the one that gets hurt. Mom already punished him. Okay. Mom already punished him and mom already punished her. Yes. So he should compound it. No, it isn't him. But if he ignores the child and doesn't spend time. Well, we do have to decide on something, Jay. We've got to decide who the new priority is. Is the new priority the ex-girlfriend's daughter or is the new priority Sabra? He's not looking at her as ex-girlfriend's daughter. He's looking at her as whatever her name is. And that's his daughter. And that's a relationship he has with her. He calls her my daughter. Regardless of who her mother is. And there's going to be plenty of room in his heart for both of you. You just have to know that this is an important person to him. And this is the kind of guy you really want. You're making a great decision by picking a guy that has a heart so big that he's just not, hey, I'm out of that relationship. Forget that little kid. And Sabra, I think.
if he were being unselfish and if the mother were being unselfish and it sounds like they have made that decision they just stop it and the little girl will maybe remember back when she was five years old someday instead of having this guy be a part of her life And putting the new husband through that. Yeah, when she's dancing. Of the ex-boyfriend coming around. When she's on the pole and she's, you know, stripping for money. Oh, stop. Jay, don't talk about a little girl that way. Instead of having a strong male influence in her life. She does. She's got a dad. I'm not. They're married now. For now. For now. Oh, so you're suggesting that we read into the future and we start spending the future's money before we have it? We're saying this woman doesn't have a great job. What I'm saying is, is that he needs to stay. in this child's life to help be a positive influence. That's truly what being different is. Dude, that's not his job. That's the new dad's job. Let me just say, Sabra, you met this guy. He had baggage.
Who is a person to make them choose between people they love? You signed up to be in a relationship with someone with baggage. So why does he have to change now? Because she's the priority. No. They can both be. They can both be. No, you can't. Yes, you can. Well, in our culture today, that's what our culture says. Our culture says. I get everything I want. I get my cake, I eat it too. I played house, not really my god, but I created that relationship. You're saying Sabra gets everything she wants then. No, no, no, no. What I'm saying is, is that Sabra, somebody needs to be a priority. Somebody needs to be. She can be his first priority and the child is still a priority as well. Maybe not the first one in his life. Sabra doesn't want the child to be a priority at all. No, she does. I'm not saying that at all. I don't want to come second. Right. She shouldn't. And you shouldn't come second. The child shouldn't be. No, I can't. The ex-girlfriend's daughter, now that he's got you, if you guys have any serious future together, in my opinion, that little girl, she's got a new father, a new family. She calls him dad. Oh, my gosh.
Sorry. Imagine saying to that little girl, you can't see him anymore. She is going to break down in hysterics. I would get on board with him and just pretend like that is your stepdaughter. Every time you guys are together, all three of you. That's a little more convoluted, though. I agree with you. You got that right. There's people that have big brothers and sisters of America. There's things like that where you have an adult figure that is a strong figure, whether or not you're related or what their relationship is. This is a positive, like Jay said, positive influence. I don't think you need to make it any more convoluted by posing as her stepmother because you're not. But just being a friend to her and being as strong as an adult. For how long? I don't know about these, like, I don't think they should have set visitation rights as if he were, you know, a father with custody rights. But I think she should still, as long as everybody's okay with it as adults. They're not. Well, Sabra's not, but she stepped into the picture. You think it's going to get better if they get married? If Sabra and this guy get married? You think that's going to get better? That little girl is going to grow, and I guarantee the visitation and the little girl seeing him is going to be less and less over the years. It's going to dwindle. But you cannot just cut it off, and you cannot say, no, today you can't hang out with a little girl because you're hanging out with me. It's my day. You can't say that. Okay, call me a monster, but if I've got an ex-girlfriend...
And that girl's got a kid. And I fall in love with that kid. I love that kid. And I break up. And I'm single. And I meet L.O.B. And I fall for L.O.B. And L.O.B. and me got a future. And L.O.B. is not really that keen on my ex-girlfriend's daughter. I can kind of see why she would feel that way. I can too. I can do. You can feel any way you want it. You can feel any way you want. You just can't rub it in somebody's face. You can't rub it in somebody's face. Yes. But what you do is you take, it's completely up to you. I'm just telling you what I would do. I would take my now wife's, if we got married. Because I'm assuming, Sabra, if you guys got a future together, maybe you get married. But L.O.B. shouldn't be marrying you if she has a problem with your lifestyle. I have the opportunity to walk away. Don't get in a relationship with someone if you're having a problem with who they are. Maybe he will meet some woman who will go, yeah.
Yeah. I'm totally cool with your ex-girlfriends. And he can. Yeah. And I bet the dad will, too. The new dad. He married the mom. He must not have that big of a problem with it because they got married. What's that? He did have a problem with it. It was a big problem for him. But I guess, you know, she stood around. She's like, well, this is practically Nadine's father. And, you know, she needs to see him. I wouldn't want to hurt her that way. So she feels like she's doing her daughter a favor. You don't want to hurt the little kid. I think Jay hit the nail on the head when he said she's found a good guy. A guy that has a big heart. That is going to make room for both of them. And I think that... I don't know, Ella V. She's got three days. And two and a half of those days. That's not his fault, though. That's her schedule. He can't plan around her schedule. That's just life. Now, I understand that maybe there should be some more room for compromise. And you say, like, I would like some more alone time with you. Do you think that we can come to a compromise? You know, I mean, that's just. That's fair. That's a fair request. But saying cutting her out is not a fair request. Yeah. I would just get involved with them. I would hang out and spend time with both of them. She doesn't. What if she's like.
What if she doesn't want to? But that's what she's in the wrong relationship. That's what she signed up for. This guy comes and he's got some baggage. He didn't just decide after he started dating Sabra, oh, I'm going to hang out with this kid now. She's always been there. Don't get in a relationship if you have a problem. That would be like me saying, if I met you, being like, well, I don't want to date a guy that has three brothers. I want to date a guy that has sisters. It would be like this. It would be like we meet. And I say, hey, by the way, I have a snoring problem. OK. And you're like, OK, no big deal. And then after a while, you're like, wow, that is a loud snore. And I think that this is the same thing. She probably thought it was sweet. Yeah. She probably thought it was sweet. Now that it's been going on a little while and she's living with it, she's like. I don't feel very, like, important to you. There's the door. Yeah, that's not his fault. I'm sorry. Let's ask her. Let's ask Sabra. He's not the one who changed. She did. Sabra, you tell me. Okay. It's so hard, you know? It's like, I really, I do love him so much. And I have no problem with this child. She's lovely. She's sweet. She's personable. You know, and I don't mind spending time with them. It's just when it comes down to the fact that he's going to be leaving for so long, it would be nice to have...
A day. Yes. Just him and I. And you are understandable. I have one question for Sabra. In the email, it says something about their time was supposed to be coming to an end soon. Why? Because supposedly what I heard from his friends who are also friends with the ex is that once she had the baby, she was going to start trying to cut down her daughter's time with the boyfriend so that they could be focusing on their new family. Of course. Of course. But then you said that the mother is on board with your boyfriend still seeing her. Well, she was for a long time, but now she's married. She has a kid. So now it's your boyfriend that's kind of possibly making a beef with her. Like, hey, you can't cut me out now. No, I don't think he's making a beef. Is he? Well, he definitely doesn't want to let go. Well, that's good. He's a good heart, you know? That's a good thing. He's, you know, when he loves someone, he doesn't just let them go. Well, he probably is. He's doing that one way or another. He's letting Sabra go a little bit. He's not. I have to break. I'm sorry. Sabra, can you stay with us or do you have to go? I can stay a little bit longer. Yeah. Okay. I got to put you on hold because I got a break. Okay. And trying to think what I can say to management since they want to kill me. Yep. Because I've gone over the top of the hour.
And they're probably flipping out. Yep. And we have to be done on time today. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. You are in trouble. No, no, Stack? Okay, fine, fine, fine, fine. I don't think anything's ever been so widely debated even off the air. But a friendly debate. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Nobody's getting upset. No, no. We were going back and forth just, like, seeing what we thought. Lots of people calling. believing that I'm a monster. I understand that. M1 Winder from Carlsbad. What up, guys? I feel like I'm taking crazy. You know, a couple things. How much more abuse and suffering does this guy have to go through? This dude's a good dude. We hear so much about guys not taking care of kids. This guy could have bailed out, man. He had later, you know, he had the opportunity to move on. I'm just blown away. Second of all, I have a buddy, a really close friend of mine.
Long, long time ago. He was probably 18, 19. He was with someone. They separate. She gets pregnant. They get back together. They get married. Well, he's that father to that daughter that's 14 years old now. She lives with him, and it's never been an issue of... And they're not blood, right? Johnny, they're not blood? No, but that never comes up. Right. She lives with him now, and I don't... Because of that, all his faults and everything about him, I love him because of that. Hang on. Hang on, Winder. Hang on. I got to get Sabra back on the line. Sabra, are you still with us? Yeah, I'm still there. Okay, cool. Well, Winder, your son now is your son or your... It's your son. Now, is it your son with your girlfriend? Are you there? Oh, what happened? We lost him. Oh, we lost Winder. It is. It's his son with his girlfriend. You mean his little guy? Yeah. Yeah. Brady. Okay. M1 Brady. But they're not married. Right. Okay. But that's their son. Yes. Okay.
If they ever broke up and they move on to different relationships, sorry, he's in the picture forever. Johnny? Yeah. Because they're blood. And she's in the picture forever. Because that's his son. That's his biological son. And let's say that it hadn't been, but he adopted him and they got separated. Same thing. He's going to see that kid the rest of his life, and that's the way it should be. I see your point. But as somebody that doesn't have the luxury of having a biological child and having to adopt, granted, mind you. That would be you. That would be me. In my opinion. That child that looks at that guy as a father figure, that's her father figure. Now until she's 50. I don't think the actual adoption process is what makes somebody a father. Right. It's not a piece of paper and it's not blood that makes you a dad. It's not. That is not what makes you a good father. It's just not. No. You know what makes you a good father? Staying with the mother. He tried. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was a sloot. You know what makes you a good wife?
Not being a slew. Staying with the husband. Absolutely. And there is no argument for me on that point. But it's not black and white. Hang on. When somebody jacks that up, they've jacked it up. Right. And you're saying it's a consequence of somebody jacking up. It is a consequence. And you know what? It doesn't have to be. The guy can still be a father. He can always be a father. He's not that kid's father. Especially because now she's remarried. He might as well be. That guy's not her father either, though. If she still considers him a father figure, I mean, I think Sabra said she calls him by his name, whatever it may be. Yeah. She calls the new guy dad. Because she's probably told that she had to. By her mother. She sees him as a father figure. So it's because of one girl's actions, why did all three of them have to suffer? Right. Okay. Now, I guess if I'm following your guy's logic, it's because she decided to do this. She decided to get in this relationship knowing that he had a close, relationship with the ex-girlfriend's kid. And it's a complicated situation. Don't get me wrong. It's really sticky. And I even look at Sienna's situation and I know that Sienna is a strong girl that can be in a complicated...
a complicated situation like that, but it takes love and it takes an open heart to do that. And I'm sure there's times where you're patient. When I met Todd, he had, you know, he had been married before and Jenna is his blood child, but it was not easy at times to come into a life like this, you know, and, and that child is going to be there. And I had a hard time at times, but I mean, I get that. It's apples and oranges. It's not the same situation. It's not the same situation, but I'm sorry. That is the dad to the child. The child only knows that man. We wouldn't even be talking about this right now if her situation was your situation. Well, I agree, but I'm just saying for her. And I'm saying I know where she's coming from, you know, and it's hard when there's a kid there. But I mean, it is different. Her situation is different. But she walked into it knowing that kid was there. Right. You can't change it. Can I say one thing without you guys? Let me get the whole sentence out. Yeah. Don't make fun of me. Yeah. Okay. I believe the children are our future. I know I'm quoting Whitney Houston.
But seriously, they are. And so why are we dealing with semantics and all this like, well, here's what technically should happen and technically should happen when really all we should really care about that this person's going to grow up to be a good person and have some strong role models in their life. So we shouldn't care about where they come from. You teach them well and you let them lead the way. See, I told you not to do that. Show them all the beauty that they possess inside. I didn't even think of that. Give them a sense of pride. That's right. M1 Whoopi from Bird Rock. Michael. Oh, you're dead. You got the Michael. I'm dead. You're dead. Michael, you're a monster. Oh, no. I don't know if I can look. Seriously, I don't know if I will ever be able to look at you the same way. Oh, no. I am speaking out of hurt, sadness, and fear. Oh, no. You will have to excuse because I'm almost near tears with this. Oh, no. You and me both. One. Blood does not negate whether you can be a viable, caring, loving parent. Agreed. First of all. I agree. I agree. And as a single parent, and I'm very careful with who I bring into my child's life, clearly this particular, I think we're calling her a sleuth. I did. May not have, she has a history, but she got a good guy here.
who stepped up to the place. No, no, Sabra's not a sloot. Sabra's not a sloot. The ex-wife. Oh, okay, okay, okay. I didn't want to be misconstrued. The ex-girlfriend. No, no. The baby mother. Baby mother, yeah. Who took the effort and did what a man, a true man does. Regardless of whatever's there, I'm staying in this situation. I'm going to be the father for this child. Now, unfortunately, that relationship ended, and he is still bound by... the love and commitment he made to that child now for the baby's mother to still allow him to spend time and everything it's a good thing because believe it or not the new relationship and everything who knows how that's going to kick out and i don't know if you've heard this term it takes a village to raise a child but and for girls having a positive male role model the more the better Keeps them off the pole. Important. Keeps them off the pole. For a variety of things.
You know what else keeps him off the pole? Moms that don't cheat. It's too late for that. Yeah, I know it is. But this poor guy can't control his death. You can't get the DeLorean up to 88 and go back. He can only do the best he can by staying there. And he can't change that woman from doing it. It's not about why this, it's about what's next. Yeah, and what should be next is, sorry, you know, I'm out. The little girl should be sad is what you're saying. You can't bail on that little girl. You cannot bail on that girl. You have to fight for that little girl. Like I fought for my fake kid. You have to do that. You have to do it. What happens when Rebecca divorces you? Rebecca's divorcing you. You're saying what if. Oh, I thought you said what happens when she divorces you. She meant what if. What if Rebecca divorces you? And she finds a lovely scrumptious man. Wow. Smaller, smarter. Oh, well. Leaner time. Leaner time. She's got the boys calling him daddy because that's his stepdad. And they can still call you dad. Oh, you know, Luke's going to call him Mike. True, true. And now she's rebuilding her family. You're going to get them occasionally a time and a half. So for whatever reason, does that lessen your role as a father?
No, but I have a right to those boys because we were married. You know what? Don't ask me. Why don't you ask the state of California what they would think about this relationship? No! No, I'm actually going to say it. This is I think it's ridiculous. The guy broke up with this girl. She cheated on him. He should have never been with her in the first place. She probably showed signs of being a cheater from the very beginning. We're making him into being such a sweet hearted guy. Oh, I'm such a father. Maybe you're a guy that stayed in that relationship because you were in love with a girl, man. You were in love with a girl and you stayed in a relationship that you shouldn't have been in in the first place because the girl was messed up. We'll be back. Live. You just found that out right now? No, last night. Oh. I purposefully got the live version. Did you? Oh, Wizzy, I love you. Oh, man. We're heated.
Sounds just like the studio version. All right. Guy and a girl were dating. The girl had a baby. The guy lived with her for five years and then they broke up because she cheated on him. The guy was like a father to her. By the way, notice the wording. He was like a father to her. The reason that they say he was like a father to her is because he can't say. That he was a father to her. How about a father figure? He was a father figure. Father figure. M1 Sabra comes into the picture. There she is. She's on the phone. She comes into the picture now. And, you know, he's not with the girl anymore because she cheated on him. And he still has visitation rights or something. Quote, unquote. Quote, unquote. Fake custody. He has fake custody.
That her mother has allowed. And is now scaling back. Trying to. Because she thinks that it's best for the kid. Because she's in a new relationship. She's now married and having a baby. She's making some concessions. Duh. Of course. I mean, of course she is. Duh. Winning. Losing. Losing. And Sabra's kind of hurt by the whole thing. Sabra's the new girlfriend. Am I missing anything here, Sabra? Have I not said anything? Right on. I mean, yeah, nothing's changed. You know, it's just I feel like more and more like if he has the opportunity to see her, he has the opportunity to see me. It's always going to be her first. Listen, Sabra, all I can tell you is, is that if I were in the same situation, I wouldn't like it. But I would do what I believe would be the most unselfish thing to do, which is to put you first. The person I'm in this new relationship with. I have a question. Now, this could be a reach, but I have a feeling it could also be part of the issue. Do you feel like maybe your boyfriend still has feelings for the baby mama and it bothers you that because of the connection with the child, he still sees the mom? That's kind of a little bit of it, but not like that. It's natural. I mean, I understand it.
I don't trust her. I don't see her saying, like, she gets into an argument with her new husband and she goes running to my boyfriend now. That's a big problem. Like, if you don't spend time with me, if you don't come out on a date with me, you can't see the kid anymore. You know, I'm afraid something like that happens. But you have to also trust the guy that you're with and know that, you know, he's a good guy. He sounds like a good guy. Yeah, he's really amazing. I mean, obviously, this is our only problem. And it's not that big of an issue. Jealousy issues, I guess. You do not have jealousy issues. You have feelings. Anyone would have a hard time, yeah. You have feelings. It's very understandable. I mean, it's a hard situation. It is hard. And Sabra sounds like she is a very together girl. She's, you know, busting her butt working in school. And, you know, I get it, man. She wants time. When my wife, I don't get the time I need for my wife. I turn into a little baby that stomps his feet and holds his breath. So I can understand where you're coming from. But I said something to Mikey at the break. You know, I said, when you're out of a relationship and things don't work out, losing your car, your home, your money, your clothes, your golf clubs get thrown out. Those are consequences. I've never looked at losing a child. And I'm not saying your son or daughter. I'm saying a child. Losing a child shouldn't be a consequence. A child shouldn't be looked at as a consequence. In my humble opinion.
Yeah, except that it's not his kid. I just said, I said it doesn't matter. I said a child, a human child. M1 Troll from Chula Vista. Hey, you guys have a great show, by the way. Thank you. My sister and my dad aren't, you know, they're not biological. But my dad met my sister when she was five. And my mom and my dad never got married. And then he left, or no, he didn't leave, but my mom left with us. when he was, when she was around nine, and they've had a relationship her whole life, and she's 42 now. And if you ask either one of them, you know, a father-daughter relationship. When did they, how old was she when they split up? She was probably right around nine years old. And did he get remarried? No, he saw the one, my mom got remarried, though. Your mom got, and he didn't? The key thing was, is they didn't, like, there was separation, you know,
in the beginning a little bit. But the relationship with my sister was a separate one than the one with my mother, but he always had that relationship. Right, but he never got remarried? No. Okay, well, if he had met somebody that he was serious about, and that woman had a problem with the ex-girlfriend, but they were married, right? No. So it's the same situation. Yeah, same exact situation. If he met someone new and she had a problem and was hurt and was like, man, I feel like I'm... You know what? I know what he would have told her. Forget about it. That's his daughter. I mean, that's how he looks at it. That's the bit, man. And, you know, a blood and a piece of paper doesn't make you a father. I mean, a blood and a piece of paper doesn't make you somebody's son or daughter. Here's what would be amazing is if... And I appreciate the phone call, man. Thank you. Here's what would be amazing is if this guy took the same tactic with Sabra. Sabra says, you know, it's really bothering me, man. This is really hurting my feelings. And he goes, you know what? See you later. That little girl comes first. And now Sabra's gone. And he's like, man, sure, I'm glad I made that choice. And this weekend I get visitation. Cool.
Well, he doesn't feel like he has to do that. Hang on. Hang on. I just want to paint this out. He doesn't feel like he has to do that. But let's say Sabra was like, put her foot down, says, this is really hurting me. And I can't stand it. And so he goes, well, fine. He does exactly what that guy just said. He says, I'll tell you what my dad would have done. He would have said, see you later. Yeah. So let's say this guy said, see you later to Sabra. And she goes, OK. She moves on, finds a guy that makes her number one. And then. And mom and new dad, they decide together, guess what, pal? You're not going to see her anymore. You were never her dad. I know you feel like you're her dad. You're not going to see her anymore. My new husband, John, he doesn't like it. And besides that, we're moving to Tennessee. So we'll see you later. And he's like, boy, I feel kind of foolish now. I kind of want to call Sabra back and beg her to come back. I'll tell her the girl's not in the picture anymore. And Sabra will go, what happened? Well, she told me I can't see her anymore. She's out of the picture. What do you think, babe? Take me back? It's really black and white. I hired an attorney. You should not feel foolish for protecting a child's feelings. You should never feel foolish for putting a child first. And if he wanted Sabra, he would fight to say, see my point of view and let's talk this out. Please. See ya. Please, I love you. I don't think it's in the kid's best interest.
Oh, I do. To keep an ex-boyfriend around. Oh, I do. While you're married to a new guy. If he's the right guy. If he's the right guy. If he's not the right guy. If he's not a good father figure. You know, if he does stuff he shouldn't do. Then, yeah, you're right, man. That's black and white. But if he is legitimately what you would call a father. Then, yeah. Let's just agree to disagree. Sabra, thank you. It was an incredible topic. And we'll keep taking phone calls. But we know we've got to let you go. You've stayed on with us a long time. I'm all with you. Thank you so much. Good luck. Good luck. Stick with him. I really appreciate you guys' help. All right, you got it. Just think I'm never writing you guys a kid. Never. M1 Sabra is actually going to be in our studio audience with a backstage pass pretty soon. Yeah, yeah. She's going to get a big hug from the kid. That's it. All right, we'll be right back. I'm a romantic, so sue me. Where's to live by? I have magic fingers. Yeah. And I'll use them. Yes. I give a great massage. I can't hip it. Someone just on my personal page called me a monster. It's a little harsh. Well, you may.
be getting a few of those today i'm not sure but you know you have like hey teeth and claws horns and a tail you have a little bit of blood on that incisor right there just a little bit hey listen you're convicted you're dug in i like that about you i love that about you yeah but you're wrong oh wow let's not open that wound up let's let it heal hey if we're having fun here let's put some neos you guys want me to fart or something no please don't please no jay anything Somebody wrote on the page, maybe Woods poops his pants and ends this topic. That was funny. I feel sorry for everybody involved. There's everybody. Yeah, everybody got hurt. Everybody's getting hurt. Literally everybody. Let's move on. Sabra now has a great boyfriend and a cute little kid in her life. Sabra doesn't want that cute little kid in her life. She says, hey, cute kid. Sabra doesn't want that cute little kid's mom in her life. And she doesn't need to. Sabra doesn't want a cute little kid's mom. Let's look at this tail. Yeah. Wiener time. 570-1949. Let's put the husky tail in his pants. In the front of his pants. Oh, my God. Exactly. The tail sticks straight up. Whoops. There it is. Hey, Jay. Hey. You got an event tonight at Dave and Buster's. I do.
You want to talk about that? Mr. Popular, I'm going to be at Dave & Buster's from 6 to 7, Mission Valley. M1's come out and challenged me to some video games. We'll have tickets to give away to TV on the radio, Rise Against, and Fitz and the Tantrums show. And then what about the Big Bear trip? What's the deal with the Big Bear trip? The Big Bear trip? Oh, boy. It's right here. Have fun, you guys. E-Jack. E-Jack. E-Jack. It's brought to you by San Diego County Scion Dealers. And thanks to them for hooking us up. We've got glasses from Anarchy. We've got Rockstar Energy Drinks. And our good buddies at Beck's USA are hooking us up with some beer. There you go. We turned out to the M1s and we said, hey, who's your favorite Mikey Show member? And it turns out I got two events. Yeah. So tell me. And thank you to Northwoods Resorts who's hooking us up with fantastic, beautiful, gorgeous hotel rooms. And of course to Adam, our promotions director, for help kicking all that into gear. So if you want to come out, you can join us for the grenade games at Bear Mountain as well. Can we join us? I'll be playing the grenade games with you. Happy birthday. Yeah, let's play some grenade games. Can I tell you a secret? Yeah. Even to this day, I still don't really get what these girls are. I don't understand the whole thing. I don't.
I don't. I don't get, like, and I mean, listen, listen, listen. I don't mean, like, I disagree. I mean, I don't understand. You don't want to go down this road. Hey, I do. You don't. Maybe we promo this for tomorrow. We'll pull the curtain back big time. Yeah, I, listen, I'd be finding out for the first time because I literally, it's like, you don't get the passive aggressive comments? No, you guys. Check it out. Off the air, you guys have talked about it, but I still don't really get it. Like, I have tried to, like, understand. Nepotism. And I'm like, oh. It's not. Nepotism. It's not nepotism. What's nepotism? It means. That's family, by the way. Well, yeah, but. Favoritism. Playing favorites. You're saying playing favorites. Yeah, but also it's like a brother. It's like a bro code. Like, basically, Adam is brothers with Woods and Jay. Oh, my God. I get that. That's what we say. Well, how come? He has limited rooms. On this trip. I get to go both times, okay? I helped him back when we started doing these trips. I helped put all these trips together. Yeah. So he and I definitely have a kindred spirit of putting these together. So he came to me and goes, hey, man, would you want to do these trips? I'm like, absolutely. Hell yeah. That's Jay's thing, outdoorsman. It's my thing. Uh-huh.
Snowboarding. Everyone hates other than Jake. When you even brought it up, you said, I don't even want to snowboard. I just want to go up and stay in a hotel room. I want to go. Why would I not want to go? But you don't want to go in the snow. Of course I would go in the snow. I would bring the baby in the snow. And Lauren's first reaction, she had an event. I want to know about it. I want to know about it. And I think it would be really good radio. The only thing is, we have 60 seconds if we're going to be able to hit the thing on time. Love you, Adam. I still don't get it. Oh, you will tomorrow. Well, off the air today, I know they're going to tell me, but I still don't understand it. It's legendary. Okay. Hillary, what do you have coming up? It is the first battle of round two of March Music Madness, and it is the Smiths versus U2. Oh, wow. Yeah. That's tough. Now, see, to me, I'm like... Yeah, yours is a no-brainer. Well, you're Mexican, though, so the Smiths. I'm Mexican and the Morrissey connection and all that. The Morrissey connection. Mikey, please vote for the Smiths. Well, it just seems like if you're looking at body of work, you know? U2. Yeah, well, U2 is massive on a sales level, internationally, whatever, huge, and the Smiths, but Smiths fans are so passionate. Smiths are legit. You can't lose.
here no seriously we are we are passionate man i'm serious man we love them we love them all right so uh okay well it's coming up and uh lovely and talented hillary is up next and we will see you tomorrow at six mike shows out