The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 04/08/10

0:00KBZT San Diego, a Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of The Mikey Show, FM 94.9. Today's Thursday. Already. Can you believe that? Love it. It happened just like that. Very fast. Welcome to the program. It's The Mikey Show. You can call 570-1949 or you can text 949mikey at gmail.com. Call us about anything. You can call about topics on your mind. You can call to say hi. You can call about questions that you have. You can call about topics that you have. You can call about anything. I've people on The Mikey Show. Myself, I'm the host of the program. My name is Mikey. And I feel like I'm standing a little bit straighter today because I got my little back adjustment yesterday. Feeling really good. That back adjustment gets me real right. No more tingling in the fingers? Not right now. It's good. They're cold. My hands are cold.

2:14It's because it's freezing in here. It's because it's a meat locker in here. Really? Is that it? Yeah, it's freezing in here every morning. It's butt cold in here. Yeah. Pepper O'Brien was like... Here comes Jay making it right. Here's Jay just turning it up. Let's turn up temperature. He makes it right, right? He does, very sweetly. 570-1949. Why does that tickle me so much? I don't know that it gets you. It doesn't tickle me. Oh, it makes me laugh. It creeps me. It does? It gives you the creepers? It's like the French kiss thing. When he says Frenching? Oh, I hate that. French real sweetly. Oh, gross! Eek. Let's see. So, Woodsy is a guy sitting across from me, and he is not wearing his glasses today or a baseball cap. Huh. I wonder why. Why is that? Well, as I look at my schedule for the show today and I look at the 9 o'clock hour, it says Charger Girls Cassie and Michelle.

3:10Oh, weird. I didn't even notice that on the schedule. Oh, you didn't? That's weird. You didn't know that, huh? No, I didn't know. What a coincidence that you look so handsome today and no glasses, no baseball cap. Weird. You know how that happens? It wouldn't be because your wife's coming into town. That's why. Jamie's going to be here today. That's so cute. Good year. I'm all dressed up like that. Pepper O'Brien is the girl sitting to my right. She's got on a... What color is that? What, the dress? Mm-hmm. Black? No, the black. Oh. See, I'm able to recognize that color. This would be, I don't know, like a... Teal. Teal sweater? Yeah, teal-ish. What is it? Aquamarine. Aquamarine. Wait till we tell you later on about the tiger thing. The new tiger commercial. So weird. So weird. Tell you about it in a minute. Sienna is 25 years of age. She is our news girl. And she would have made a great Quaker. She would have made a great Quaker. It's not like that. I'm saying you would have made a great Quaker. I feel weird. If I were casting a movie, I could cast you as a Quaker. Absolutely. And you would win an Oscar. Why? I'm telling you you'd win an Oscar. Right now. Give that classic beauty. That's right. It's classic. A Quaker? That's right. That doesn't seem like a beautiful thing. Absolutely. It seems like a pilgrim or something. They're very pure. That's right. They are pure. They are.

4:36And Jason is our producer. He is 46 years of age. And his name is Jay. And the guy is like MacGyver. He's a whiz. Call us. Talk to us. You can talk to us about anything you want. I want to tell you about this airline deal because it's going to have a lot of people irritated. And when we saw it today, we went, are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Well, there is some kind of... good news to it, kind of. There is? Is, have you heard of the airline Ryanair? No. No? No. Okay. I guess anybody can have an airline now. No, no, no. I've flown on it a few times. Ryanair? It's a big one in Europe. Really? Yeah. Okay. It's based in Dublin. You know, it's a big one, like Spain, all over there. Yeah. I've flown on it a few times when I studied abroad. Mom! Mom! I like Ryanair. Make them be able to fly us to Houston. They were. I thought it was a pretty legit airline until now. Mom, how come there are no direct flights from La Jolla to Mission Valley? I just want to get there quick. On Ryanair. Mom, how come every airline doesn't break the speed of sound? So this airline Ryanair is now doing something new. Mom. Mom.

5:58I want Ryanair. Real bad. Real bad. I like the name of it. I don't know why. That's a cool name. Ryanair. Yeah. So what's the deal with them? Well, they are now considering charging people to use the bathroom on their flights. That's shocking. Yes. I mean, it's not like you need to pay $10 if you need to do it. They're going to have a coin slot entry. That's ridiculous. Yeah. What's your alternative if you don't have money? Well, they want to do it on short flights, like an hour or two hours. Yeah, what is your alternative? You know what your alternative is? Yeah, you hold it. Or you go weed. Or you go weed in your pants. No, you have to get a coin entry slot. You know, you have to pay to go. How much do they say? They say that it's about a euro or a pound in England, which is, you know, a dollar and a half. What's the upside of that? You said there's like a good side of it. Well, the good side was that it's not in the US. But the reason they're doing it is because they want to they can add extra seats in there if they can take out some of the bathrooms and only have one bathroom because that will, you know, eliminate.

7:05A lot of people going back and forth. Because people don't need to relieve them. It's a luxury. They said they could squeeze about six extra seats on the plane, and that would help reduce fares by at least 5%. No way. So that could be good. I mean, maybe. Yeah. Well, I'm glad they don't do that here. But they do other stuff that makes us mad. Well, you'll never have to worry about it. You wouldn't go to Europe for a billion dollars. Why wouldn't you? Never. Because I don't like using money I don't understand. And the hotels are like old. Dinner takes five hours. No. And the toilets are like a hole in the ground. Yeah. He's out. He's out. Ryanair is like the southwest of Europe. It's a go-to. You know, cheaper flights, really good. No way. I would power Mikey down so, like. Hon, we're going to go on a European vacation. Some parts of it would be, like, super fancy. Fancier than what you could find here. Lying on the beach in Greece. Yeah, but you know what? The super fancy is, like, furniture that's made of wood and painted gold. And it's also, like, a 12-hour flight for him. He's like, forget it. That's where the term, like, the euro comes from. Euro trash? Is that what you were going to say? No, no. Like my shoes? I'm just going to say euro as in, like, metro.

8:16Sometimes they're more on the cutting edge than we are. They're more modern in some cities. Not the hotels, though. Yeah. Yeah. Really? Oh, yeah. They have brand new hotels? Yes. I thought everything was like 800,000 years old. They have oxygen pods there. They have really nice stuff. I didn't know that. I thought that everything in Europe was old. It doesn't matter. He still won't go. There's Ritz-Carlton's all over Europe. How old? It doesn't matter. Yeah, it does. That's my whole point. They're just as nice as the ones here. They're just as nice, just as clean, just as amazing. But it's old. The robes you wear, just as soft. I understand. But that place was built in 1840. No, in 1340. No, not necessarily. Listen, I don't care if they have brand new flat screen TVs with brand new telephone systems with brand new sheets and blah, blah, blah. If that place was made in 1840. Haunted. Weird. Get me away from it. Get me away. They don't make them like they used to. Those structures. They're beautiful. I'm with Mike. Give me a W any day or like a season. Yes. Have you ever been out of the country? Mexico. You know that. Yeah, I've gone to Mexico. That's it. Weird. That's it. I've been to Mexico. I'm very uncomfortable in old stuff. It creeps me out. Like walking around.

9:37Munich wouldn't do anything for you? I love that. I love that part. Really? If I could sleep, like you guys almost had me. When you guys said that there's brand new hotels. There are. Like with normal walls, not creepy walls. Like creaky, like crackling walls. The rooms are tiny. You guys are awful right now. Creepazoid. Creepazoid. No, I stayed at a really, really amazing hotel. It was an old building, but it looked brand new. Nope, won't do it. There was no creaking. Won't do it. No way. There's more than just old buildings there, though. There's new ones, too. To stay in? Yes. How about a hostel? It's not communist Europe. You just made my heart drop. Would you ever stay in a hostel? You just made my heart drop. I've stayed in the hostels. That would be me. Laying in bed, curled up in a ball. They're not fun. You and I would never be able to go on vacation. No. I wouldn't either with you. No. There's no way. Are you kidding? First of all, she's not staying indoors. She's like, let's sleep on top of Big Ben. Let's camp out on top of Big Ben. I'm with you, Pepper. Let's go. Let's do it. You guys would be good.

10:47Jay and Pepper would be the most amazing pairing for The Amazing Race in the history of The Amazing Race. Consider it slayed. You know what I mean? Like, you guys have already won. The show hasn't even been cast yet. Can you imagine the infighting, though? We might get at each other, though, at some point. But you guys would win no matter what. Like, I know it already. They would win. She could be organizing her backpack. Like, okay, this goes over here. I've got to stack these up like this. Socks, go here, Jay. Socks, go here. We should do Lord of Jay versus Woods and I. Oh, my God. That would be epic. Mikey's the host. I would stop and get cheeseburgers on the way. The kid's out of breath. She had us pregnant running behind me. I'm outrunning you. I couldn't even be the host of The Amazing Race because I'd have to stay in a hotel that was over 14 years old. No way. We could do like Amazing Race Idaho or something. Yeah, I could do that. How about Amazing Race Mission Valley? So you can get to the Chevron quickest. You guys would definitely beat me. I cannot navigate this place. No, you can't. Doesn't it creep you out to walk into a place and the floors go... They don't. They do. No, they don't. Is the bed all antique? I've stayed in hostels. They're not bad. I stayed at the Ritz in Barcelona. Is the bed antique?

12:14No, it's like nice. You know what Europe is? It's farty. Oh, it is. Totally farty. Totally farty. Way farty. There's a lack of deodorant. There's a lack of grooming. If it weren't for Europe, you wouldn't be here. Well, fair enough. I'm not saying that, but I'm saying. You wouldn't be wearing the jeans. You know what? I'm going to spend my money domestically real good. Yeah. The kid's going to slay Hawaii. Yeah. Oh, absolutely. I'm going to go to Hawaii probably three times a year now that I live here. Yeah. Why not? What about like Australia? I've been there. How great would Australia be? Australia would be great. Australia is great. For whatever reason, in my mind, I think that Australia would have construction that's new. They do. It's amazing, bro. You'd love it. Yeah, but it's way farther than Europe, too. That's not my problem. The problem is, it's a little bit of my problem, but the main problem is the old, scary, creepy, creepy, creaky, old. Bro, when I was like 25, my fantasy was to have a buddy and backpack across Europe. Not for any amount of money would I do that now. No amount of money. I wouldn't do it now, but I did. Not now. Sleeping in a tomb. I'm too old. I'd be...

13:18whining and complaining the whole time. They don't have Copenhagen over there. They don't have Copenhagen. Sure they do. The food would creep me out. Is Copenhagen such an American word? I stayed in a hostel one time in London and there was like 15 people in my room. Oh my goodness. You can get it in Denmark. Yeah. I would never do that. I would never. I didn't know. I thought I had my own room and when I walked in there was bunk beds and I was like, oh no. There's jails that are nicer. No. What about wireless internet? They got that. Some of them do. You just said some of them, which indicates to me. I'm sure the hotels do, but the hostels, only some of them have internet periods. The food is what skeeves me. I can't eat anything outside of America. It's the weirdest thing. Pasta? No, I could go for that. I could go for the weird food. I can't do that weird food. Sometimes the weird food's delicious. Anytime we travel anywhere, Jamie's like, oh God, better pack some granola bars because he won't eat. Oh, they have really good food. You can always find something that you love. Like in Spain, they have these things called tortillas. But it's not like Mexico. I've never heard of tortillas. What is it like? They have tacos? No, no, no, no, no. It's not like. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Hang on. Let's have everybody stop for a minute. We have to have a clip of Sienna saying in Spain, they have this thing called tortillas. Amazing. That's the greatest clip I've ever heard. Anyone who's been to Spain knows what I'm talking about. It's like an omelet, kind of. Yeah.

14:42But just that phrase is fantastic. And cheese and egg. It's so good. Like a frittata? It's so good. It's like a cake. It looks like pound cake, but there's like potato in it. I have heard from other foodies that the food you get in Europe, like, it puts American food to shame. Tapas. You're right. Yeah, you know what else, though? I can picture eating a hamburger there and it tastes all gamey. Oh, 100%. It tastes gamey. The good meats from Texas, Nebraska. There's no USDA. You guys are the worst. Spoken like a true American. That's right. Proud of it. Yes. That's where I live. It's called Consider Me Toby Keith. That's right. Okay. I'll put a boot in your ass. Last time I checked, I have something called a zip code. That's right. I don't have a country code. I don't have a country code. If it weren't for Europe, none of us would be here. Come on now. Plebeian. Bummer. Fan your mind. Idiot, Mike. Mikey Show. Hello? Hello? Yes. Hey, Mike, what's up, man? What's going on, dude? Hey, it's M1 Mean Gene. What's up, Mean Gene? Oh, over in Europe as we speak. That's right. He wrote a message on the fan page on Facebook that he wanted to have a little talk with me about something that I said about Italy. Yeah.

15:58For one, I've been to Italy. I went there about a month ago. First time. Weird. You sound like a local. What's up? You sound like a local. Listen, bro. I'm going to tell you, I'm like you. I'm American. I don't speak English. I speak American, all right? That's right. I'm telling you, man, if you ever go to Italy, I'm telling you, you're going to fall in love with the place. It's like finding your second best wife. I'm telling you. It's great. Oh, come on now. He's right. I went to the Cinque Terras. And the Cinque Terras is like little island-y things in Italy. Of course you went to the Cinque Terras. Mom, I want a Cinque Terra. Buy me a Cinque Terra. Mom, will you fly my senior class to the Cinque Terras? There's five little islands that are connected. But that's where pesto and focaccia bread was created, so you have it fresh every day. Mom, can we hire an Italian man to make us fresh tortillas, cinquateras, and pestos? Cinquateras. So, Mean Gene, what did you want to correct me on? Well, I mean, you seem to be very pessimistic about it because of the whole walking thing and the whole working out.

17:08Yes. And let me just tell you, first off, the point, I mean, it's not like America, all right? And I understand that, but you're not going to want to drive because it's so beautiful, you're going to want to walk everywhere to see it all. All right. And I'll give you a quick example because I know you probably got to go. Yes, I do. But I'm in the Vatican. I'm doing a tour of the Vatican. And by the way, Jesus is my homeboy, all right? I'm kind of big on that. All right. And I'm going through the Vatican, and I'm doing the whole museum, doing the tour thing. And here's why I tell you, if you want to go anywhere in the world, go to Rome. I'm doing the tour. I'm going into the Sistine Chapel. All right. And I go in and I look up like everybody else does. And there's hundreds of people in this room. I look at the top and obviously I see the painting that Michelangelo did of the Sistine Chapel. Yeah. Now, bro, I'm telling you, I'm in the room with probably 300 other people. I'm looking up and I see the painting. I mean, I've seen these paintings a hundred times. We all have. Of, you know, the original sin of creation. Yes. Bro, I'm telling you, I look up. I know there's people around me. I feel people around me. I know they're speaking. I can't hear a thing. And tears just start. I'm telling you, I'm just thinking about it. That's awesome. Hey, dude, it sounds great. Listen, I'm all in on all that stuff. You got me wrong. I love all that stuff. That sounds great. I just don't want to sleep in an old creaky hotel. It creeps me out. All that stuff sounds great.

18:31You know how you like air conditioning, right? Yes. Okay. The weather's so good there, you don't need it. I'm a big guy. I love air conditioning. You've convinced me. Gene, I'm going. Thank you. I'm going. Let's go as a show. After the show. All right. After the show. I'm going to Ron. One last thing, bro. Thanks for the hookup on the bumper sticker. You bet, dude. You just got to send me. All right. Thank you. Yes. By the way, I guess one more thing. You know, maybe you hook me up with a backstage pass. Maybe I have a reason to fly to California. Maybe we'll do that. You come out here, dude. You're in. When in Rome. Anytime. Yeah. When in Rome. When in Mission Valley. That's right. Thank you. Thank you very much. Later, bro. I'm not against the Italian culture, for goodness sake. I love it. I mean, I just want to. He's one of my favorite callers. I love Mean Gene. I love Mean Gene. Hey, bro. Hey, bro. I was in Sistine Chapel. Yeah, I love that. Tears, tears are streaming down. Michelangelo was there. I was looking up at Michelangelo and I was like, hey. I was in 16th Chapel. That's right. Sistine. I love this. I love it, too. Is this Pavarotti? What's that dude? Potts. It's the... Paul Potts?

19:46Andrea Bocelli. Bocelli. Is he the one that sings songs? What is that? There's like the one thing. That was beautiful, Woodsy. Thank you. That was absolutely gorgeous. Whatever it is, I want to hear it. 570. It's such a power down for me. Does it? Oh, dude. All right, let me give you a real fast one. You ready? Maybe not. Is that Ave Maria? Yes. Ave Maria. Oh, my God. I thought that was coming from the computer. Now that's something special. Goodfellas or something. No, the Godfather. Godfather. Plebeian. Plebeian. Mikey looks so disappointed. I wouldn't have even guessed that. I said or something. Is it true? Or something. They get out of it and they pull me back in.

20:56Goosebumps. Nurse. Yeah, my dad. Godfather 2. Nurse. Nurse. So huge. Pepper, have you ever seen the Godfather trilogy? I've seen parts of all of them, but never all of them in their entirety. Yeah. 28-hour show. Maybe we make that right. That's right. They're the greatest. We're knocking about 14 hours right there. They're the greatest. But we have to be on the air. We can't be just watching Godfather. No, we watch movies. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Yeah, we do. It's some good stuff. Play it over the air. Really? I'm going to talk about it tonight. The whole bit. It's great. The whole bit. You in? Yeah, I'm in. Hey, there's a new commercial. So I told you we were going to tell you about this. Oh, before we do, though, real quickly. I want an update on the coal mining situation. Like, what's going on with these guys? Well, last night, rescue crews headed over to the coal mine in West Virginia late last night. And this was two days after the explosion, in case you didn't know what happened Monday. 25 people were killed. Four people are still missing. So these rescue crews are going in to try to find these four people. Now, they've drilled holes to ventilate, trying to get all, you know, lower levels of carbon monoxide and all of that.

22:03stuff out of there because it's not in good conditions for people to just start walking into. For sure. So they're going to hopefully find these guys. The outcome is not looking good because they've been in there for a while. But, you know, hopefully everything's okay. Now, I mentioned earlier that there was this new Nike commercial with Tiger Woods. And it's one of the strangest things. It's chilling. It's really chilling. I have no idea. I have no idea what this commercial is. When I tell you what it is, and Pepper, have you seen it? I just saw it on the feed up there, yeah. You guys have been tripping out. It's so weird. In fact, it's weird to the point where Woodsy told me about it through email, and I wrote him back and I said, is this real? And he wrote me back and said yes. Is Tiger Woods on a commercial? We'll tell you exactly what it is, and we'll actually play you the audio of it. Woodsy's picking the music today. And let me tell you something. What you're hearing right now is sort of the theme. It's one of the greatest playlists. It's pretty good. The theme? Hair. Kid's going back to his roots. Oh, yeah. And I'm going to get filleted for it. And I don't care. We'll play you that Tiger Woods commercial next. Listening to The Mikey Show. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. 2010. A new frontier in Thailand.

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26:47Are you looking for authentic Mexican? Yeah, how did you know? Because I'm Cesar Gonzalez from Amatesta Taqueria, wey. Whoa, man, where is it? At the corner of Richmond and University. Do you have chimichangas? Chimichangas are a gringo invention. What about nachos? Same thing, cuñado gringo food, not authentic Mexican. Wow, what else is masquerading as Mexican food? Well, let's see, cheddar cheese, Spanish olives, sour cream, french fries and burritos, even burritos. No, not burritos. Yes, pelo de maíz, ever heard of Texas? Yeah. That's Tex-Mex food, bro. Remember the album? I'm away. What does Mama Testas have? Okay, gringo. At Mama Testa, we have nothing but the most authentic Mexican tacos you've ever seen. We start in the Yucatan Peninsula. We don't stop until we get it, TJ. Get it? We have everything on the menu. We steam them, we fry them, we grill them, we stew them. Anything you can do to a taco, we make it. We only use free-range meat, so there's no hormones that you cannot get any weirder than you already are. I had no idea I wasn't eating Mexican food. Mama Testa Taqueria. Authentic Mexican food. Richmond and University in Hillcrest. If I can be Bobby Flay, I can surely blow your mind. Come in and let me put some Mexican food. in you stay tuned for a million bottle giveaway announcement do you have troubled skin acne well against the better judgment of our management team we're going to prove to you once and for all that proactive works so if you want to try it give us a call because we're going to let a million people try proactive and receive our legendary refining face mask free if you call right now

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29:32Every used vehicle comes with a Drew Value limited warranty. 12 months or 12,000 miles. See Drew for details. But shop early online at DrewFord.com or at the store where the I-8 and the 125 meet in La Mesa. Nothing. Every opportunity in front of you. The world's forward-thinking companies behind you. The Pacific Ocean beside you. Nothing standing between you. The Rady School of Management at UC San Diego. Innovators under construction. Learn more at rady.ucsd.edu. Now, back to the Mikey Show. Mikey. I get along better with women than I do with men. Sienna. I always wanted to punch someone in the face. Woods. Do a lot of things I shouldn't do, pal. Lauren. I worked at Comic-Con. And Jay. I don't watch sports. I have nothing to do. If I'm not playing, I don't want to see it. This is the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. This report is brought to you by Pickup Sticks. For a great deal on freshly walked meal, check out the Dragon Deals value menu at Pickup Sticks. Six delicious meals, only $4.99 each. On the 8 eastbound, after Taylor Street, an accident, a couple car collision, one in the center divider, one's got a flat tire, one's changing the tire, the other's on the right shoulder. And they've called a tow truck for the car on the right shoulder. Does that sound confusing? Just sounds like a big party. Anyway, the 15 southbound before the 94, an accident there earlier. They just cleared that. That was a pickup truck.

30:51and an SUV, that pickup truck was going the wrong way. But they've got a tow truck there who picked up that pickup truck. Whoa, what a report. This report is brought to you by Ace Hardware. Find great deals that help turn your spring to-do list into a to-done list. Right now at your Ace Hardware store, get in, get help, get on with your life at Ace, a helpful place. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. I love this. I love it, Woods. Love it. It's so huge. I wonder how many people know this. I know this. It makes me want to run through a brick wall. Sienna, I'm going to guess that you're not familiar with this song. Really? Sienna just turned 25 years old. And, you know, she's not really up on the hair metal. Is this hair metal? Yes. Who is this? Sticks? Who is this? Saga. Saga? I'm going to slay her tomorrow with her playlists.

32:06Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? Oh, I know. Is Mike in the mechanics? Yeah, because she gets everybody. She gets everybody. No, I'm being serious. I've never heard that song. She's like, is this the soundtrack to Willy Wonka? I was being serious. It sounded like they were Mr. Roboto guy. You can do a lot worse than Styx. What's that? You can do a lot worse than Styx. That's true. I wasn't saying anything bad about it. Be defensive. Be sweet. Be accusatory. Be sweet. Be real sweet. I'm telling you what to do. Okay, be real sweet. I'm telling you what to do. Kid doesn't like to be told what to do. Pep doesn't like to be told what to do either. That's true. Pepper and the Kid. Yesterday, Pepper and the Kid at Benihana were something else. What do you mean by that? We went to Benihana. And what are you flagging me? I was just going to fix it. Oh, yeah, yeah. How did you know that that would drive me? I knew. That would make me bad. I asked Woods, get the paper.

33:07You know, that I normally print for Mikey and he didn't staple it. He didn't put a number on it. Shannon knows that that. God, really? Dude, all it is is it makes me uncomfortable. Come on, Mariah Carey. No, no, no. It isn't that. It's not that. It's not petals of, it's not rose petals in my toilet. It's not. It's, you know what it is? It's washing my hands 50 times, you know, and like scrubbing with soap. OCD? Yeah. Yeah. Total OCD. It was like Pepper the other day with her folder. Oh, and the CDs? We need to talk about the CDs, too, at some point. Pepper does the Best of the Mikey Show and files them so perfectly and intricately and, like, perfectly. They have to be. Crazily. Dude, right? I was trying to help, and so I started unwrapping the CDs because it's a pain in the butt to unwrap all the CDs. So I unwrapped them, and I stuck them back in the box. And she looks at me and goes over to the box, takes them all out, and redoes them. I'm like. Yeah, seriously. She throws us like, they don't fit if they don't go to fit. This is why they don't fit. Yeah, it was amazing. This is why they don't fit, you guys. And another brick crumbles. Yeah. And then we looked at the folder that she had of all the best of bits and it's so typed and perfect and like in alignment and everything is perfect.

34:25Very meticulous. Very meticulous. Somebody has to keep track of it. That's right. Who better? He needs his things looking exactly the same or else he doesn't know what they are. You threw a highlighter away this morning because it wasn't wet enough for you. It's true. I would have done that, though, too. I hate dry highlighters. It's true. It wasn't perfect. I can't give her too much. grief about it because I'm exactly the same way. I looked down and I said, oh, Woods didn't staple it. There's not a number. He's going to be confused. I was. I was confused. He was looking at it like, I don't know. What do I do with that? What do I do with that? We were talking about this. We so wish we put something on the whiteboard on an April Fool's Day because you would have Ron Burgundy'd that. Oh, for sure. All day long. For sure. I am Ron Burgundy in that Ron Burgundy used to read whatever was on the teleprompter and if... They hold up the white dry erase board here in the studio with information on it for me. I read it no matter what it says. I just read it. Why didn't we? I don't know. I would have done it, you guys. No doubt about it. Yeah, we would have gotten you once. You'd be like, guys. And then see, I would have erased it and written something else. You would have done it again. I'd have done it again. All day. All day. I'll do it all day. I thought about doing a little coup d'etat with my music. Yeah. Just to see. Putting something on there.

35:39Oh, yeah. You could have written, you know, the name of the artist is, you know, Mike's a dork. And I just said that. The name of the artist is Pepper and the Kid. And the name of the song is We Slayed You. No doubt about it. I'd have read that. There's no doubt in my mind I would have read that. 100%. We slayed you. There's breaking news coming in right now out of LAX. Yes, the LAX airport. Two terminals are closed right now. A passenger picked up a suspicious bag that was flagged for secondary screening and somehow made it past the security area. So TSA and police are canvassing the terminal to locate the passenger and where this bag is and to check out what's in it. But right now there's hundreds of people just standing on a bridge at one security screening entrance. Stuck. That is so... So weird, man. I mean, LAX, imagine two of those terminals being closed. Madness. You know, a lot of people love to travel on Thursday because they're like, I'm going to take Friday off and leave Thursday, have an extra day. Now they're sitting there going, really? Could have been work. And your wife has to stop there. She's flying from Dallas to LAX as we speak. Right now. Really? Yeah. And then she jumps a little puddle jumper. My wife and I went to Hawaii last year and we flew out of LAX and there was a woman.

36:53And she was going through the x-ray stuff. And she threw this big fit. She just started getting really upset. And they were trying to calm her down. And she just walked away from her bag and left. Wow. Well, you know what happens when you do that. Red alert. Yeah. I got pictures in my iPhone of the German Shepherds sniffing her bag. Of course you're. The bikeys are snapping, right? Absolutely. Look what we're witnessing right now. This is crazy. I'm going to post this to my blog. I'm going to put it on my blog in a couple hours. I'm going to tell everyone about this. I'm going to twit pick it. So weird. All right, speaking of weird. So Nike has a new commercial of Tiger Woods. Now, if you didn't know, Tiger Woods' real name is Eldrick. Eldrick Woods. Eldrick and what's his wife's name? Elin. And the new commercial is Tiger Woods just standing in front of the camera. And it's black and white. And all there is, and he's standing out on a golf course. And he's wearing a Nike hat and his typical vest, sweater vest type deal. So they pick him back up then? I thought they dropped him. Well. Do you have this?

38:23I got it. I had it too. The audio? Yeah. Yeah, I got the audio. You know that. The audio is of his father. And I guess they have it as, you know, sort of file audio. You know, they've just got it on file. His father passed away. His father's passed away. That's what I was like. This, I mean, obviously it's him talking and it's obviously old audio, but boy, it hits home. Wait, Tiger's standing there. And his dad is talking? It's just, now, this is what's really, this is what I don't understand. I don't know what they filmed, if Tiger is okay with this. They're still a sponsor. So, yeah, I mean, I'm sure he's got to approve. Perhaps he filmed it knowing what they were going to do. And they said, here's what we want to do. If you want to stay in good graces with us and you want to continue to be an endorser of our product, this is our idea. This is what we think we should do. And he must have said. Yeah, I'm okay with that. You have to release a talent release form. Wow. And so picture Tiger just standing on the golf course, looking very solemn. Just standing there. And it was obvious to you guys when you first saw the commercial that that was his dad's voice. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Because to me, I wouldn't have known. Oh, you'll know. You'll know when you hear what he says. Okay. Here it is. Tiger, I am more prone to be inquisitive, to promote discussion.

39:44I want to find out what your thinking was. I want to find out what your feelings are. And did you learn anything? What the heck? Dude, I know. Is that like a voicemail he has? Like, that's weird. That's another thing. It's like, where was that recorded? When? Why? Why? But in context. In context? I was like, whoa. Wow. Dude. And then what? That's it. The commercial ends? That's it. The commercial ends. And it's Tiger just, is he like smiling? No, he looks solemn. He looks solemn. Like I'm messed up. Yeah, he's got the look on his face that you would expect him to have on his face. I do not like that at all. I told you it would. You can like him, love him, hate him. It will evoke a reaction. Ew, it's just like, dude, don't try to recreate something his dad was trying to give him advice-wise after something like this when his dad isn't here. Mission accomplished though, Nike. Mission accomplished. Everybody's talking about it. And I wonder if this makes Nike look like they're exploiting a dead man. There's no question they are. But man, talk about a... I mean, there's a guy right now on Madison Avenue with his feet on his desk, with his arms behind his head going, damn right. I'm brilliant. Yeah, but not always is bad publicity. That's not bad publicity. Does that make you want to go get a pair of Nike? No, but it is a...

41:07Brilliant commercial. Commercial wise. I've been in advertising. It's brilliant. So have I, but I don't think it's brilliant. It's brilliant. Well, listen to us. I think this, that they had a goal in mind, but I think that the goal, it's very possible the goal could backfire. Here's what I mean by it. First of all, the message is shame on you. That's the message. I'm disappointed in you. Well, yeah. And and but because Nike is putting their brand on it, they're saying, so are we. Yeah. OK. And I think that the general consensus might be, well, shame on you, Nike, because you're exploiting a dead guy. They are. You know, they are exploiting that. But again, man, it goes back to if there's one if you guys know a little bit about the relationship Tiger had with his father. Super close. I mean, super close. When he wanted a gust after his dad died. He wept. Nobody had ever seen any emotion from him. He wept. They were really, really close. So this, to me, when I heard it, I thought of my dad. Immediately, I thought of my dad and what my dad would say. And I was like, yeah, that makes sense to me. I think it's just... It's very creepy. Don't get me wrong. Tiger, I am more prone to be inquisitive, to promote discussion. I want to find out what your thinking was.

42:34I want to find out what your feelings are. And did you learn anything? The Nike advertising executive that came up with it says, if anybody accuses us of being exploitative, all we have to say is his father even says there that it's meant to promote discussion. Right. But about what was he talking about that that was taken out of context? We don't know. We don't know. But that was obviously taken out of context for the purpose of that commercial. You should have to get permission. I mean, obviously, he probably got it. They got permission from Tiger's mother or whoever. But you know what I mean? Like, what if his dad didn't want to put a stamp of approval in that commercial? Sure. Well, and this is a deal, too. I go, what is Tiger Woods infidelity have to do with your product? I think that having heard it the second time, this is what clicked for me. They dropped him, right, as a sponsor. I thought the only company, as far as I know, the only company that had dropped Tiger Woods was Gatorade. Oh, no. No, no. Who else dropped him? I think Buick dropped him. Uh-oh. Listeners will know. M1s will know. Accenture dropped him. Call us, 570-1949. I think Nike's the only one that kept him.

43:59So maybe they're saying, okay, we're not going to just keep commercials, like funny little commercials of him wearing his red shirt and black visor. We're not just going to keep and pretend like something didn't happen. So before we move forward with all those pump you up commercials, we're going to address the situation and bring you as far down as you can feel about him and then pump you right back up. Could be. There's wisdom in that. Yeah, there is. To be like, okay, well, Nike didn't, well, how can Nike just support this guy? You know what the problem is, though? You know what the problem is? Problem is they don't have Pepper saying that. Because when Pepper said that, I'm like, oh, yeah, that's good. Problem is they don't say that. They just put it on and you're like, ooh, creepy, weird. It's meant to hit home. I mean, it's meant to hit home. It's meant to evoke a reaction. It obviously works, you know? Let me ask you this, Sienna, because you didn't, like, would you know that this is Tiger Woods' dad? I am more prone to be inquisitive, to promote discussion. I want to find out what your thinking was. I want to find out what your feelings are. And did you learn anything? See, you don't think that if you heard that, you would think to yourself, I wonder who that is. Maybe that's his dad. I guess I would have. But, I mean, just I don't know the voice. I never followed Tiger Woods before. But, I mean, hearing it, I'm...

45:20I'm like furious right now. What does it make you think? If that was, if I was Tiger Woods and one of my parents passed away and I heard on television. But he's in on it. You know that. Yeah. He's in on it. So how do you feel about it knowing that he had to have approved it? I just think, man, like how, how could his situation keep getting worse and worse and worse? And I just, this is like, this is like disgusting to me. Like I'm disgusted. Yeah. Like I can't believe they would do this. Like that's, his father has passed away and they're putting his voice like as a punishment. Like, saying to him in a negative way, I'm just like, man, you don't know what his father is thinking from heaven. Like, you don't know. Pepper, how does it make you feel? Well, I mean, I guess I'm kind of ambivalent because I'm just so over the whole Tiger situation. But I think with just listening to the conversation that you were having with Sienna and thinking about what Wood said, I guess Sienna and me and maybe even you, Mike, are not their target market. Their target market is someone like Woods, like a sports guy that is so into the sport of golf that wants to see Tiger succeed and is going to get that emotional reaction. I'll be real. I'm going to be totally honest with you. I'm not into. I've only recently picked up golf, but I bought Nike products. And when I bought them, I think of two people. I think of Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods.

46:48I think everybody will buy a pair of tennis shoes at some point, you know, like even if you're not an athlete or workout or whatever, like you buy a pair of tennis shoes. And when you're making the choices, you want to associate yourself with something that's cool. Right. And so that has been the association in my brain. And I'm not even a golfer, you know, I just think, oh, they're good. You know what I mean? Honestly, it makes me not want to buy Nike. It does. Yeah. I just think how low are you going to go for publicity? What do you think of it, Woods? I thought it was powerful. Really? Yeah, man. And you like it. You're like, hey, I'm in. Like, what is it evoking you? When I saw it, it evoked chills in me. Because I've heard those lines from my dad before. After some of the things that I've done. So do you go, you go, you know what, Nike? Good for you. Good for you. Not necessarily. I don't think it's. It just, it brought that father-son thing out. And it makes him seem like a. Like, makes Tiger seem, like, just like you. Like, just like me. Instead of, like, this larger than life, like. It really brought him down to earth for me. And to have, think about it. No matter how big you are and how big you get. You know, Elvis had a mom and dad. Elvis' mom would be like, you can't do this. And he'd be like, okay. You know, I mean, I get it that he passed away. But, you know, they do commercials with Jimmy V. Jimmy V passed away. I mean, they're always tugging at heartstrings, right?

48:11You know, Jim Valvano passed away years ago. I think that the reason that this one's a little bit different is because it's not meant to be inspirational. I get it. It's meant to be shaming. I totally get it. But I have had that conversation with my dad. I've sat down in a room. My dad has said, I want to know what you were thinking when you did this and felt that shame of an action that I did. What else is going to make you get up and go live your life better than your father telling you, hey, man, make me proud? You know, really, that was the first emotion I had, I thought of my dad. Yeah, so it's trying to get people to be like, man, like, even Tiger makes mistakes. And I can hear my very own father saying that to me. That's exactly right. You know, so it's like getting him, getting people that maybe were wishy-washy, like golf fans. I mean, that's what they care about when they're talking about Nike and Tiger Woods. Getting them back on board with him. So, if you're just tuning in. You're going to hear a lot about this. Very controversial commercial. Creepy. Out today from Nike. And it's Tiger Woods standing on the golf course, black and white, looking solemn, while the voiceover of his deceased father plays in the background. Tiger, I am more prone to be inquisitive, to promote discussion. I want to find out what your thinking was. I want to find out.

49:37what your feelings are, and did you learn anything? Our public, the American public, is a culture of, I want to know everything. And because we are, we're going to want to know, did Tiger say this was okay? Whose idea was this? Where did they get that audio? Where did it come from? All these questions are going to be asked, and they're going to have to be answered. And when we find out, it may make us like, either more skeeved out or more forgiving. But what I can tell you is people are going to want to know everything about that. M1 sailing widget. Hey, Mike. Hey, guys. You guys are right away. Thank you, brother. Thank you. Hey, I was just thinking, you know, who cares who said it? That's a great quote if you think about it. And it really said to me, you know, the second time, because the first time I was like, you know, Steve, ooh, that's weird. The second time you listened to it was more like, Christian, it's...

50:43It's about looking back at the things that have happened, carrying on, you know, carrying on with it, but, you know, building up from that experience and learning from your mistakes and, you know, moving on as a human being. I mean, yeah, it sucks. I mean, it's like when you go to your dad and say, hey, I wrecked your femur. You kind of got to get over it and get through it. Is it moving on if you're focusing on it? Not if you're focusing on it, but I think it's kind of, you know, I'm just generalizing or just drafting something here. Maybe they're saying, you know, like I have a network of friends, I have a network of Christian friends, and when I do something wrong, they put me in check. Maybe they're saying, hey, we're helping to try to put him in check here, and, you know, just wait, you know? There you go. I think it's a great quote that his dad just happened to say it. You know, what if John Maxwell or Miles McPherson or somebody else said something like that? It just all happened to be his dad. Yeah. All right, Sailing Widget. I appreciate it.

51:43That's a good take. Sienna? I just can't help but think about what's going on in Tiger's brain right now and just think, like, is he just standing in a room, like, the past few weeks of people just coming up to him, like, you need to do another interview. You need to apologize. We have this clip of your dad. We're going to put it on a commercial. And he's just like, yes, yes, yes. Like, fine, fine. Like, he doesn't have a mind of his own anymore to say no is what it's sounding like. Well, now that tells me that you feel that he should have said no to that. I 100% feel that he should have said no because when I think about... how it would be to me to hear the voice of one of my parents who I was so close with after they've died and to hear the rest of the world hearing it. It's like, that's a private, he's not here anymore. Like that would make me break down every time. And no matter what, we're using my dad's voice for an advertisement for nothing good for tiger. You know, like that's his father's voice. And it's not I don't think it's benefiting Tiger in any way in this commercial. Well, I mean, those words may be of benefit to Tiger that I understand. I mean, it's just like what said. I've heard my dad say those words to me said them to him. And if his dad was alive, that's the thing. It's what I can't escape is it is his deceased father's words being used in an advertisement.

53:02I can't escape that. I can't escape. I can't get away from that. I can't either because it's like his dad didn't say those words to him in this instance. So why are we using them in this instance? The thing that's kind of kind of drives that point home is you see Tiger on your screen. His dad says this. I mean, he's not smiling. Tiger, I am more prone to be inquisitive, to promote discussion. I want to find out what your thinking was. I want to find out what your feelings are. And did you learn anything? Screen goes black. Nike swoosh. Yeah, see, that's what I don't, if it were like a self-endorsed, he put it out on his own dime as like a, look, I'm tired of it. Like I am a human, excuse me, I'm a human too. But the swoosh at the end is like. This is for advertising purposes. The swoosh is almost an international icon of product. Just do it. Yeah. Just put your deceased father's clip. Tiger Woods had to see that commercial for the first time. There's no way he didn't break down when he saw it, right? I don't know, but M1 Matt saw a press release on this commercial. Let's see it. Hear it. Let's do this.

54:29Take a quick time out, come back and talk to Matt, who saw a press release on the spot, which means he's got to know something about it. We'll do that next. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More coming up on FM 94.9. The Drew Ford Used Car and Truck Superstore is having a huge sales event all month long. Drew is offering over 80 quality pre-owned Fords, Volkswagens, Hyundais, Nissans, Hondas. and more. All red tag discount price for this special sale. Every used vehicle comes with a Drew value limited warranty. 12 months or 12,000 miles. See Drew for details, but shop early online at drewford.com or at the store.

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1:01:05This report is brought to you by Odor Eaters Powders and Sprays. Sitting in traffic stinks. Make sure your feet don't. Odor Eaters Powders and Sprays. They absorb sweat and destroy odor on contact. So keep your feet fresh and dry all day long with Odor Eaters Powders and Sprays. On the 5 southbound at the rest area, an earlier accident, two-car collision. People are outside their cars exchanging information. Looks like one of the cars already drove off, so you should be able to get through without a problem. On the 15 southbound through Escondido between 78 and Felicita Road, we're seeing some slowing about lower 40s. right now. This report is brought to you by the Juvenile Diabetes Foundation. The Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation is accelerating the crucial research that represents the hope for a cure. Please call them 1-800-533-CURE or go to jdrf.org. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Financial media station, the new home of the Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Oh, that's big. I know. Woodsy is picking the music on Thursdays. And today the theme is 80s, and it's good. It's just, it's great. It all reminds me of high school. Yep. Good stuff. Reminds me of my band Gypsy Rose. Yeah? Mm-hmm. Gypsy Rose was... Yeah, you know that. Was it in junior high or high? Both. Awesome. 570-1949. Call us with your opinion of the Tiger Woods commercial on the new Nike commercial. Woods read...

1:03:08that they are calling it the most unusual advertisement in the history of advertisement. It's crazy. Nike said in a statement, Mike, that, quote, we support Tiger and his family. As he returns to competitive golf, the ad addresses his time away from the game using the powerful words of his father. Nike said in a statement. Duh. I was telling you guys off the air, and I just think that no matter what, people are going to have different opinions about it. And when it comes down to it, I think you just think about how your relationship is with your mother or your father. And if you could see them saying that to you. And just the problem I have is just that he's not saying it to Tiger. He's like saying it to Nike. Now, you do have to be in the paradigm. You do have to be in the paradigm that Tiger okayed this. I know. They couldn't get it without his approval. I know. And that's why it's like, okay, well, maybe you can't get that upset because he's on board apparently. But I just, I think he's probably just so, like you were talking about, is he sitting in a room? I think he's just so broken down and is hearing from so many sources how horrible and terrible he is. And he's just like.

1:04:24Do whatever. Right. Do whatever. Just get me back. Like, I just want to play the game and just get all this heat off of me. I think he filmed the footage of himself on the golf course for this commercial. I think so, too. I just I just looked at it during the commercial break because I wanted to see what Tiger's face looked like. And it looked like it's just a picture of him. He's blinking. He's blinking. He's blinking, and it looks like he almost tears up. He doesn't even move, and I'm like, uh. Well, I'm sure they played the real audio for him to try to evoke an emotion. I'm sure. It's so powerful. Just like, man. M1 Hey Baylor wrote in, and he said that Earl was also employed by Nike, so they may have had this recorded already, and that Tiger had no choice. Huh. Wow. How do you not have a choice when it's someone who's not here anymore? But if they own the rights to what Earl Wood said. That is disgusting. That's big business. That's big business. I just want to know what he was talking about initially. Paul McCartney doesn't own his songs. Michael Jackson did. You know what I mean? That's the creepy thing. You write a song, somebody else can own it. I think that it would be very clear that his father was, and everything's speculation, but I think that it would be very clear that his father was...

1:05:42Probably talking about his golf game. Yeah. What if his father was talking about his own affair that he had? He had an affair. Earl had. Earl had an affair. What if that's what he was speaking on? But would that be recorded? I don't know. Or would that be in a room? Did they have to bail him out with the same public image issue? I don't know. Well, he was no Tiger. You know, Tiger is the biggest, arguably the biggest sports star in the world. The world. He's global. If you haven't heard the audio, here it is. Tiger, I am more prone to be inquisitive, to promote discussion. I want to find out what your thinking was. I want to find out what your feelings are. And did you learn anything? Like, does this benefit Tiger, though? Or does it benefit Nike? I mean, obviously, it's going to benefit Nike because we're talking about it. But that's what makes me upset. Yeah, it's going to benefit Tiger. But how? Financially. Number one. I think it benefits him in other ways, too. Absolutely. They think it's going to help. It humanizes him, one. It makes him money, two. And it kind of makes him more like us. It doesn't only humanize him. It brings him down to kind of our level. And basically, he's getting a scolding from his dad. Yeah, that's private.

1:07:03That's not my business. It creeps me out as a consumer. And hasn't he been humanized enough in the media the last few months? Yeah, we haven't done that enough. We got to shame him more. We know he's not perfect. I think it's an effective commercial. Financially. And I think it works. He has more than enough money. If I were him, I would just be like, peace to all of you and all of this. I'm going to live in private and golf on my own. You can't do it. Why? You can't do it. Because he's a competitor. A competitor doesn't say, you know what? I'm going to go. Derek Jeter doesn't go, I'm just going to go hit balls in a batting cage. He lives for that moment. Well, he has to be on a team. He can be on his own league. I'm sorry, if I was Tiger, I would be done. Roger Federer doesn't go hit balls on a tennis court. M1 Shelley? Yes. What do you think? Well, I think that Tiger is obviously very shamed by everything that happened and, of course, all the media attention. But I think that he's thinking about possibly what his dad would have said to him in that situation. And it is thought-provoking. And I'm not a huge, huge tiger fan, but I think it does humanize them. And, you know, we all have been there when we were little, getting scolded by our parents. And it helps you to grow as a person. Okay. And I don't take any umbrage with anything that you said. I think that everything that you said there is right on point. My only question to you is, is that when that message is done being delivered,

1:08:28Is it perhaps poor form to put up a Nike swoosh to let people know that, oh, by the way, the last 15 seconds were sponsored by Nike and the makers of Nike products? Well, he was sponsored by Nike and Nike wants to put it out there that, you know, they obviously are not, you know, they don't think that it was a good idea for him to do the things that he did. I mean, I guess there's a couple of different ways you could look at it, but it doesn't really bother me so much. Thank you. I appreciate it, Shelly. You know, when I was a kid, I used to be really, really interested in advertising. Oddly, but I was. I was really interested in advertising. And I always had a fascination with commercials and the way that they advertise their products. In fact, I'm so into advertising and marketing. that I'm really into the Mikey Show billboards and how they appear and how they don't appear and what they do. Some people may remember that we did a commercial billboard for the Mikey Show, and it has me covering one eye. And you can see the tattoos on my arm, and I'm covering one eye, and it's black and white. And the reason that I wanted it to be black and white is because most billboards that we see today are in color. And we pass them all the time, and they don't make any cognitive.

1:09:56movement in our brains we don't go they just blend into the to the scenery and we don't really think about them so instantly if it's black and white it's different and so people may take notice of it but if people don't know what the mikey show is or who i am and they see these tattoos and such an odd thing to be covering one eye what why the covering of one eye and the message that we put up on the top was like you dot dot dot but different And I wanted the font to be a very soft, pretty, almost girlish font. And the reason that I did was because next to a dude with tattoos covering one eye, that makes your brain go, what's that? This does that too. This ad does that too. The only thing is, is that, you know, Jay was in here too. Jay was talking about it and we said, is it? exploitative or exploiting a dead guy and he says i don't think it's exploiting a dead guy at all because his dad probably would have said all that stuff well maybe he would but it is a product and what if tiger had put the same message on his website the same exact thing no nike swoosh what would we have thought then would we have even would we've even thought that was from a point of view you might go tiger put this on his website

1:11:27tiger wanted us to we know his dad isn't alive and isn't commenting on it now so he's putting an old piece of footage that he had or audio of his father and in context we get that this father would say i want to know what you were thinking and we might go oh wow that's very powerful but when you put that nike swoosh up at the end of it now it's not It's an advertisement. It's an advertisement. You can't escape it. You can't escape that it's about tennis shoes and golf clubs. You can't. Is it so much the fact that he's not... Now, answer me this question. Hypothetically, Earl Woods is still alive. And Earl and Tiger go into a room and they cut that spot. You still got a problem with it? Yeah. Why? This would be my question then. Hey, guys. And now, is it for Nike? Yeah, it's for Nike. Yeah. Hey, guys. Why are you recording an advertisement using a message that should be very private? Because Nike has been a part of their family for the last 15 years. Okay, that makes sense. Why don't you go into a boardroom with the CEO of Nike and tell him that? What if something happened to one of us on the show? Something, you know, and we had to come clean. Where would you do it? Would you come to the radio station and, you know, people are asking you questions about it.

1:12:51We would come here. You would tell your story. Maybe you have an audio clip from your father or your dad calls in. And he's like, yeah, I was really disappointed, Jay, that you did this, blah, blah, blah. And then at the end of the thing, FM 94.9. Yeah, the Mikey show. I'm like, hey, okay, that's the way it worked. Mikey would not do that. Wait, wait, wait. If it said FM 94.9, the reason that it would say FM 94.9 is because we're on FM 94.9. And a radio station has to identify itself. That's just, that's what radio stations do. Nike doesn't have to, he's not like, it's not like our televisions are run by Nike. Yeah, it would say Fox News or something. But the show that you listen to is powered by Mama Testas and by AIS. I mean, it's an advertisement. That's exactly what it is. What if one of us had to come out and apologize about something and we said... Brought to you by Mama Testas. Like, wouldn't you guys think that's a bit of a cheap shot? They would say it right after that person was done saying it. Yeah, but still. Why not? Tell the lovers, tell the lovers, right after we were done. What does Mama Testas have to do with Lauren screwing up? And that just, you know, Jay, you just, you nailed it for me in my head. And that, I think, is what I was thinking about when I started talking about when I was a little kid. I used to be fascinated by advertising.

1:14:08One of the things that I used to think would have been really cool is to just say exactly what you meant. When Pepper sort of put it in perspective. Pepper is Lauren. It made complete sense to me. It made total and complete sense to me. In other words, if they had come on and they had said they had done a one minute spot and they said, hey, my name's Tom so-and-so from Nike. And we know what Tiger did and we're disappointed in what Tiger did. And we were talking about supporting him and keeping him on as a sponsor. Here's something that we think that Tiger's dad would have said to him if Tiger's dad were still here. Because then you're humanizing it. Then you're at least giving me a reason why your product is being sold in conjunction with a dead dude.

1:15:07Like, I get it, okay. It just seems so unnecessary, all of it. I'm just like, why did you, I mean, couldn't you think of something else? Couldn't it be his mom talking to him or something? Like, why does it have to be his father, who's not here anymore? Mom would bother me, too. That was his man. The mom would bother me, too, though, because I would think, why are you, what are you doing? I mean, I agree with you, but what puts me over the edge? being so against the whole thing is just that his dad isn't here. And he couldn't say, yeah. And I'm just thinking in my head, if that was my dad and I heard that, I did not want the rest of the world hearing that. Can you guys tell me how you would feel about this? Because I just said this to Woods out in the kitchen and I want to know what you would think. Because Woods says, dude, they got to deal with it. How would you deal with it? And I said, if I had been in the boardroom and they had come up with this suggestion, I would have said, guys, I don't think we should do that because I think that it may. exploit his dad who's not here anymore. And I think we could take some heat for that. And then if somebody said to me, fine, what are we going to do instead? I would have said, why don't we let him start to win again? And then once he starts to win again, we put a commercial out. Okay, what's the commercial going to be? Are we going to address the affair? No. And the reason that we're not going to address the affair is because we don't want to associate ourselves with that part of Tiger Woods.

1:16:30The reason that we hired Tiger in the first place is because dude plays a mean golf game. In fact, he's the best golfer to ever live and play the sport. And so when we bring him back, that's what we showcase. That's what we highlight. We don't want any part of his personal life. It's very clear his personal life is a wreck. Yeah. But his golf game, once it gets good again. Is something that we would like to associate ourselves with. And so we'll see him pumping his fist. After he's sinking one. And we'll do that bit. But I think Nike could have taken some heat. Of like. Gosh you guys aren't even. You know you're endorsing this guy. Who some people believe is a dirt bag. And blah blah blah. And you're just going to start showing the. the red shirt and the black Pfizer and the pumping of the fist, and you're not even going to address it. Like, they had to address it in some way. But couldn't it have been Tiger just standing there on his own, talking, saying, I'm sorry? He's done that. It's been done. But what else does he have to do? I mean, all he can do is say sorry. His dad saying that is going to make it all better? That's the thing, man. If I'm Johnny Nike, I'm like...

1:17:36Hey, listen, what can we say that hasn't already been said? That, what they said. How about this? Why don't we get some charcoal up to speed, get it nice red hot, get it white, and then we'll drag him over that, and then we'll tie him to the end of all, you know. How about that they've been a longtime sponsor for this guy. Yep. They've kind of laid low why this is all going on. Tiger's done all the stuff he's done so far to get. to start getting back on track. So now what they're doing is they're going, okay, we see this guy is making the necessary steps to get his life back in order. What we're going to do as a sponsor and as, you know, and I don't know this, but as a potential, you know, family, you know, if somebody's been with you long enough, just like AIS with you, Mikey, you've got a relationship, you guys are bonded. Now they're like, okay, this guy's doing all the steps to get up back on track. We're showing our support for a guy we believe in and we think he's going to correct himself and get himself back on track. We're forgiving him. And this is how we're doing it. See, I would love if an advertisement just said that. We believe in him. We love him. He's a part of our family. We forgive him. We hope you do too. Nike. We wouldn't have been talking about it for 45 minutes had they done that. See, and there's something to that. Like, I think that we could talk about it for 45 minutes.

1:18:56But I don't know that that necessarily equates to sold tennis shoes. In fact, if what Sienna's saying is right, it may equate to some Adidas being sold. How many times have you said Nike and Nike swoosh since we started? A hundred times. How many pair have I sold? None, but you don't work at Foot Locker either. Right. I mean, what's the old adage? Any press is good press, right? Yeah, but I don't believe it. I don't know if I do. See, Woodsy is on to something. You know what? I bet we'll know. I bet we'll know if they're... I think Jesse James and Tiger can tell you that any press is not good. That's true. But I think we'll know if the stock goes up. Won't hurt their career, either of them. They're both going to be fine. I mean, Tiger's playing in Augusta today. Did Jesse James have a career? Yeah, he actually, I read this, he made more money than she did. Really? Yeah, and you know what? A lot more money. A lot more money than she did. Through his stores or through what? Through everything the guy's done. My wife used to be... reel in on Jesse James. She saw him on The Celebrity Apprentice and said, oh, real cool guy, blah, blah, blah. She loved him. Mm-hmm. You know? And I thought his image was really cool. Yeah. Flat-billed baseball cap with tattoos. Loved it. Wizzy hates it. Ate it. It's not me. It doesn't look good on me. Not your look. I look like a clown. You know that. I wore my new hat, by the way. You gave me a hard time for it. Did you? It just doesn't fit with the kid. All right. Well, let's switch. Yeah.

1:20:19Because we got some other stuff, man. We got a lot of stuff. We got a lot of stuff today, dude. We got a lot of... Hey, got a lot of... We got a lot of... Let's see. What have I done? Let's see. What was that, Woodsy? That was sports, bro. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. We do sports on this program. That's right. Let's do some. You know that. You know that. Woodsy's got some sports. Well, I watched some of the Padres game last night. They lost. They lost to the D-backs 5-3. Weird thing was, his eight-run score, they were all on home runs. Kevin Correa went six last night. The long ball got him. He gave up three homers. And the D-backs over the pods 5-3. We're 1-2. Yeah, you're 1-2. Great. It's okay. Fantastic. I hope, Woodsy, that we get you to the point where you start saying we. I did, didn't I? You said you.

1:21:26Yeah, I think because you're not feeling it yet. You're not feeling it yet. Well, you know what my problem was? I put the game on, because I'll watch any baseball game anytime, and I made a comment on Facebook. The broadcast is like watching paint dry. Really? I was like, fall asleep. I love the game, but man, it was rough broadcast. Yeah. Also, there's been a mass exodus at the University of Kentucky. Their starting five have basically said, later, we're going to the draft. All five of them. All five of them? They're all underclassmen. They're all expected to be first-round picks. They're like 18, 19 years old. Even though they didn't even make it to the Final Four. They're in the Elite Eight. But still, they're like, hey, we're going to go get picked, so we're out of here. So is that the deal? Like Kentucky will get one year out of some kids? Isn't that? I mean, most people do. I mean, if you have a really good basketball player, you're going to get a year. It's ridiculous. Weird. Stop it, kids. It's terrible. Yeah, go to school. So did you guys know that Tiger Woods is playing in the Masters? Have you guys heard that? No way. I don't know the name. Yeah, he's teeing off today at 142 Eastern. He's playing with Matt Kuchar and KJ Choi. There's some more explosive audio. No? The same. Oh, I thought it was the same one. No, no, not the same one. More explosive audio out of Augusta yesterday. The chairman of Augusta National, Billy Payne, had this to say about Tiger. Cut two. It is not simply the degree of his conduct that is so egregious here. It is the fact that he disappointed all of us. And more importantly, our kids and our grandkids. Our hero did not live up to the expectations. Look at Sienna. Oh, my God. This is their way forward.

1:22:54I hope yes. I think yes. But certainly his future will never again be measured only by his performance against Parr, but measured by the sincerity of his efforts to change. Let me tell you. Do we have a minute? Yeah. Can I tell you guys about Augusta National? Please. My dad has told me some stories about Augusta. Okay, it's a private club. You could join. I could join. But that would never happen. And it's a special invite only. So let me tell you this. A guy joined. I think he was a young doctor in like Atlanta. He joined Augusta. And he's like, dude, I'm a member of Augusta. He went out. He started playing golf every single day. And he was always on the course. He's playing 36 holes. Why? Because he's at freaking Augusta. And he's a member. Sure. The members came to him. They sat him down. They said, you're playing too much golf. They said, you can't be out here every day, dude. My jaw just dropped. And he's like. But I'm a member. They're like, yeah, you're kind of being an idiot. You can't be out here every day. It's the weirdest, the weirdest place in the world. Like every year, you know how they, you know, you have dues at a country club. Yeah. The way they do it at Augusta. You go in, you order what you want. Let's get a scotch and soda for you, dinner, whatever you want. The end of the year, they take the total amount spent. They divide it by the number of members. So if you go once a year, you're still paying the same thing as Sienna's family that goes three days a week.

1:24:12Really? That's true at a lot of places. It's the craziest place you have ever heard of. But, like, what place are you a member of and they tell you, you can't golf here, man. You're golfing too much. Well, I know that Augusta is the end all be all. It's it. It's it. There's nothing bigger than Augusta. My brother was recruited at the University of Arkansas. And their athletic director is named Frank Broyles. And he's legendary. And he's a member of Augusta. And my dad was like. Hey, my dad's like, maybe we go play at Augusta. And Frank goes, yeah, Gary, I'll take you to Augusta. But you got to charter a private plane to fly us down there. Like, they don't mess around. Like, they're the biggest hard asses ever. Okay, so I'm guessing that your point is that because they're so prestigious, dude is well within his... I don't agree. No, you don't. I don't agree with it. I think it's insane. I'm with Sienna with the eye roll. I think it's insane. But you know what? It's the way it is there. I mean, no women are allowed anywhere near that place. Really? No. You don't remember the hubbub a few years ago? I'm sure Pepper loves that. I'm sure too. She wouldn't want to go. Who cares? Augusta Schmogesta. Wow. It's insane. So loud. My New York Yankees.

1:25:32I'll say my. What? I'll say my. What are you talking about? We beat the Red Sox last night. Took two of three at their house. You are ridiculous. We got a break, Mike. Yeah, we are. We have time to talk about the Yankees. We are. Don't we? This is poison. Life goes on. You know that. Look at that. Yeah! This is Tiger's theme song right now. Can somebody tell me why 3.3 million sterile med flies were dropped over San Diego? Can somebody please... Sienna, can you tell me when we come back? Oh, and Woodsy, he's moved out here from Texas, and he's very, very concerned about something that has to do with his dogs and that he wants to ask. He said to me, he was like, dude, can we talk about this on the air? He said, I need you. And I go, how come? And he goes, because I genuinely need help. I need the M1s. Bad. So we'll tell you about that next.

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1:32:00Or visit LexusCPO.com. 36 monthly payments of $2860 per thousand financed. Call 1-800-USA-LEXUS for important APR program limitations and offer details. Only a limited number of customers will qualify. No down payment required if qualified. Offer ends June 1, 2010. Make sure your low fares stay low to St. Louis with no bag fees from Southwest Airlines. Grab your bag. It's on nonstop from San Diego to St. Louis starting May 9. Book your nonstop flights to St. Louis now at Southwest.com. Weight and size limits apply. This report is brought to you by Official Payments. On tax day, don't wait in line at the post office. Go online at home. Use your Visa card to pay your taxes online and on time through Official Payments. It's fast, easy, and secure. Certain fees and restrictions do apply. Visit OfficialPayments.com forward slash Visa. Encinitas on the 5 southbound between Lucadia Boulevard. Santa Fe Drive just a little slow right now. Also looks like Escondido is kind of tied up on that 15 southbound between the 78. Felicita Road pretty much stop and go traffic. Also brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners, there is no better time to visit your neighborhood Toyota dealership for your maintenance, state-of-the-art technology, factory-trained technicians, and competitive prices. They'll have you smiling with confidence. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Good morning to you. This is Bert from Dragon Island with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report.

1:33:25for a Thursday morning being brought to you, of course, by Guayaki Yirvamate. Rainforest grown and approved by all people, so try it out. It's good, and you'll like it. Surfwise, over the next day, today, actually, we'll be looking at some smaller surf across the board as there's some new direction to it. Some west-northwest windswills out there, touches of southwest joining in with it. Cleaner today, though, a little bit more line to it, a little bit more definition than yesterday. Running in that heat-away-side zone on average. chest tide plus, maybe a few shoulder highways in standout spots coming off of a high tide right now, so look for some improvement in most areas heading through the morning before it starts to drain out in the afternoon. Beach breaks likely still to be your better call as there's more energy focusing at most of those spots, and at the higher tide, more broken up, so there are corners to be had. Looking better for the longboard, though, as it is kind of stopped in slow. We need breaks, lower tides, we'll have a couple pop-up peaks, too, but don't expect too much energy or juice there. For up-to-the-minute surf reports and forecasts, go to surfline.com. And for everything you need in order to go surf, check out one of South Coast Surfshelves, five locations, or go online at southcoast.com. The surf report is brought to you, of course, by Goelka, Yerba Mate, and it can only be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't know the difference between odd and even. Woods. I, to my credit, Steve Woods, have a hole in one.

1:34:53Lauren. I just don't like the way beef tastes at all. Zienna. I made reservations for us last night. And Jay. I'm so tired. On FM 94.9. Have you seen Air Guitar Nation yet? No, I need to though. You told me about it. Documentary. I'm doing it right now. Documentary about competitive air guitar. Stop. Greatest thing ever. I can't wait to see it. You guys always bust out the air guitar in commercial break. Absolutely. Would you be interested in that? One in. What's that? Would you be interested in that? A documentary about competitive air guitar. No, who's the judge? There are judges. How do you judge? Like, sanctioned judges. To see if they're really hitting records. Creativity, creativity, and flair. Accuracy. Accuracy, you know, it was like. I love it. It's hysterical. It's hysterical. Air guitar. Air guitar. Just ordered Jake a little Guitar Hero guitar. Huge. Not the game, just the guitar. Because it'll fit.

1:36:07Like me. Very tiny. Little fit? Little tiny. Little fit in his little hands of the perfect size. But not the game? No. He's not ready. He's just going to play with the toy, though. Yeah, he went to a friend's. Loves the guitar. Yeah, he went to a friend's. He loves the guitar. Did I tell you he was crying because he lost the pick? We only have one pick. Just searched and found his pick. Oh, my God. I was so upset. Yeah, Woods Jr. I heard him on the phone. Daddy, Daddy, I need a pick. I need a pick. I need a pick. Yeah. He plays guitar. He strums it and sings. Yeah. What was it? What were we singing? He's got the whole world in it. And I was playing the chords with my left hand and he was strumming. And we were playing it. He loves it. It was great. It's great. Senna. Y'all. Why were 3.3 million sterile? Med flies. What's what are those are flies that are going to medical school? Yeah. They're almost doctors. They're almost trying to be doctors. Exactly. Well, they were released. Three point three million sterile med flies were dropped over San Diego County to help fight against the Mediterranean fruit flies. Now, you know about the fruit flies, right? They get into your fruit. They they lay eggs inside the fruits and vegetables. So when you cut into it, you see it's full of maggots and larva.

1:37:21This is like a big problem here. Is there a picture? Because yesterday in my house, there was like those little tiny flies. I'm like, where do these things come from? I saw them at the beach. I saw them by my house. Yeah. How tiny is that? No, no, no. When it starts getting warmer, these flies come out like crazy in the summer. Like we're talking August. They're all over the place. So what they did was they dropped over 3 million sterile med flies. They were released over El Cajon. And the goal is to get these sterile male flies to mate with the fertile female flies to prevent producing offspring. It's really crazy because they have 3.3 little flies with little bags of frozen peas on their crotch. Because they have to take each fly and give it a vasectomy. A vasectomy. Can you imagine? And it's the tiniest procedure. I don't get it, though. Wait, so they're dropping the flies? Well, they have a little thing. Yeah. A little piece. Who shaves them? They're just sterile. Jane? I think they're known for being sterile. The male. Then they're males. Excuse me. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Where are we going? And you're being inappropriate. Well, of course you are. What do you mean for surgery? Yeah. Oh, I know. Oh, I know.

1:38:36Somebody's got to. Somebody's got to. Yeah. I don't want to know what he said. It's gross. I don't know what he said. It's a very, very tiny procedure. Yes. Nick, maybe you can do it with your tiny hands. Really? So the whole reason that these med flies came into San Diego is to help decrease the population because they'll end up dying out if they mate. It's very sad. Mm-hmm. Well, I hope it works, those gross little flies. They attack. Over 260 different fruits and vegetables. They get all in there. Imagine cutting it open and there's larva. That's her nightmare. Maggots. Luckily for me, I don't eat fruit or vegetables, so I'm in good shape. Yeah, that's right. Gross. They don't get into ho-hos and fudge-striped cookies, do they? No, not that I know of. Haagen-Dazs? There'll never be a problem. They don't get into Haagen-Dazs? Unless there's Haagen-Dazs flies. Copenhagen flies. Copenhagen flies. It's gone. Wow.

1:39:36Are you kidding me right now? He undresses all the time. You're a mess. I mean, he's just a mess. He's absolutely... He's ripping his belt off. Yesterday after the show, Woods and I were in the office. He just threw his belt in the garbage. It hurts. It digs into my stomach. It's a good thing it's not at all distracting. It's not your stomach that's the problem. It's the belt. Yesterday, just he and I are in the office. I'm like, Woods, you have something on your butt. I don't know what that is. What was that? I take a picture with my phone so he can see it, but the picture is not good enough. He has to take off his pants. Stop it. And I'm sitting there like, uh. I wasn't commando. I had boxers on. You had boxers on, thank goodness. And he turns it around and he's checking it out and smelling it. I didn't smell it. Yes, you did. You put your finger on it and you smelt your fingers. I think it was gum. Somebody put gum in my chair. Yeah, Jane gum. That was you taking your clothes off. There's like six little. Patches. Right on the crack of the jeans. Todd is getting into his car and he's like rolling up his sleeves. He's like, oh yeah? Take your pants off. No, Todd's probably laughing. Just like, oh what? He is. He doesn't care. Oh what? He knows I get her for four hours a day. Did you hear about that kid in, this 19 year old kid in Colorado? Or Colorado.

1:40:54Because, what did I say? Colorado. Colorado. Colorado. Are you from Wisconsin? There's a 19-year-old kid, and he just got arrested, and they fired this judge, right? Who's been in this judging scene for over 30 years. Wow. It's a judging scene. Like a DJ. Judges, they all party together. Yeah. I'm with the judge. Lindsay Lohan's dating him. Yeah. I'm on the list. I'm with the judge. Yeah, I'm with the judge. Oh, okay. Yeah. Is that why you have that baseball cap on? The judging scene. The judging scene. I love it. They all just sit around and judge each other. It's one of the hottest scenes in L.A. It's a pretty hot scene in Colorado. Colorado. I want order. So what happened? Well, this judge was just fired after issuing an arrest warrant for this 19-year-old kid who failed. to turn in his library DVD on time. He had an overdue library DVD. He issued a warrant for his arrest. The kid was arrested, taken in, and all for a DVD, which he said, look, I packed it in a box and sent it in over a week ago. Then they called the library. They're like, oh, yeah, we have that. So the judge was fired for being a... I don't see why he was fired. Because, well, A, well, number one. It's a library. I think it might be...

1:42:13Like, perhaps you do punish someone for not returning a DVD. Perhaps you do. Yeah, you know what you do? You charge them a nickel is what you do. Maybe you charge them the cost of the DVD. 20 bucks. You know? But I would say that a arrest warrant might be a little... It was definitely over the line, but maybe suspended. I mean, if he's been there for 30 years, maybe he was just trying some radical new... Well, I think he might have been okay issuing the warrant. except for the fact that the kid had returned the DVD. Right. And that played bad on the judge. He's obviously lost his freaking mind. Would you be an upset mom if your 19-year-old was taken into custody for not returning a DVD that he'd returned? Of course. Well, he'd be out of the house if he's 18 or over, right? Well, you would think so. One would think. No, mothers are protective. That's right. Well, I wonder what that mom might have sounded like. if she were calling in to 911 to complain about the fact that her son had been taken into custody. And as soon as I find that 911 call... Nice. Can I help you? Yeah, hi, sir. I'm calling because my 19-year-old son is being arrested or trying to be arrested for a DVD that they say he has, but he actually returned the DVD. He stole a DVD?

1:43:40No, no. He took a DVD out from the library of his school, he returned the DVD, and now they're trying to arrest him saying that he hasn't returned the DVD. Well, so he stole it, he stole it, and then returned it before they knew it was stolen? No, sir. He never stole the DVD. He rented it legit. Okay. What DVD was it? It's Return of the Jedi, but I don't think that that really matters. Return of the Jedi? Yeah. He probably has every right to be arrested there. Is your son there? That's inappropriate. Is it? Yeah, just a second. Hang on. Hello? Yeah, so this is 911 operator. You allegedly stole a DVD, is that right? No, sir. I checked it out of the library, but then I returned it. And it was Return of the Jedi? Yes, sir. Do you think you're a Jedi? Do I what? Do you think you're a Jedi? Because you know you're not a Jedi. No, I don't, though. You don't think you are? No. Kind of? No, I just rented it to watch it. Return of the Jedi, really? Yeah. But I took it back, and they're trying to arrest me for not taking it back. You should be arrested, pal, for renting Return of the Jedi. You're 19 years old. Is this 911? Yes, this is 911, but I'm trying to give you some friendly advice. Maybe go try to see a girl naked. Maybe try that.

1:45:07Can I speak to 911, please? This is 911. Yeah, but you just said stuff that's weird. Hey, what's the name of your imaginary friend? I don't have an imaginary friend. Do you live in an imaginary jungle in front of the Ewoks? No. Do you have a lightsaber? No, I read the movie because I wanted to watch it. I know. Maybe try going out, meeting some girls. What? Come on, Pete. Grow up. Grow up, Pete. Mom, can you tweet? He's saying that I have an imaginary friend? What's your imaginary friend's name? Shiloh? No. What is it? Do you think you're a Sith Lord? Are you a Jedi? What's Yoda up to? I don't think that. Can you talk to my mom? Mom, can I talk to 911? Put mom on the phone, you will. Hello. 911, how can I help you? What are you saying to my son, sir?

1:46:07Not that I just told him that I'm very sorry and that I'll send a unit out as soon as possible. Okay, okay. He doesn't have an imaginary friend. Sure he doesn't. Okay, you guys have a good day. You don't do the same. Okay, bye. You don't do the same. Sure he doesn't. He's fired up. Put your mother on the phone, you will. They figured that's probably the only language a kid could understand. Wow. That's fantastic. So Woods needs some help. From M1s. Oh, boy. Woods is moving out here. He's moving out to an area where there are coyotes. Scares me, scares me. It's called San Diego. Scares me, scares me. Yeah. Well, basically. I mean, they are. They're everywhere. Great. Yeah. And Woods is worried because he has four little Yorkies. Now, if you don't know what. Yorkies. No, no, no, no, no, no. It's Yorkies. No, no, no. Yorkie. That's how they're pronounced. Well, for those of you that don't know, a Yorkie is one of those cute little dogs that you put in your purse. Yorkshire Terrier. Basically the world's smallest dog. No. They're not. Cutest little thing. They're just the sweetest things ever. You know what happened to Jessica Simpson's dog, right? Yes. Why do you think I'm flipping out? It was taken by a coyote. Yeah. And it was a Yorkie. No, it was a Maltese. Maltese. Daisy. Sweet little Daisy. Gone. Gone. Right in front of her. Yeah, lunch.

1:47:28Just saying. Gotta be careful. So, Woodsy wants to know, what do you do? And what he means by that is, like, do you buy an owl? Do you, like... Do I get a rifle? Build a scarecrow? Do you get a rifle? Do you... Is there, like, some deer urine I can sprinkle around the house? Like, I'll do... Should I put up an electric fence? Like, seriously, I don't know what to do. And I don't either. And I told him, I don't know. I would build a huge wall. They can jump. No, no, no. Okay. Build a gold wall that's 48 feet high. Get one of your Mexicans to build you something. Yeah, just hire a Mexican. Mikey, are you for hire? I mean, Mikey, I'm sure you know someone. If it's a huge wall. Here's the deal. Okay, all right. Let me take you back. We're at Easter. I'm at Easter brunch with Jay and his friends. And they're like, oh, dude, that's where you're moving? And you got what kind of dogs? Like, I left there in such a tizzy. And I called my wife. I just said, tizzy, I'm dead. I called my wife. I started talking to her, and she's like, oh, my God, are you serious? I'm like, yeah. I'm, like, cursing. I'm like, what are we going to do? We tried to tell you that. Listen, you guys, you know that. Yeah, I need strangers. No, people know, though, what to do. In fact, people are calling. Thank God. So let me tell you, they basically said, oh, yeah, dude, they can jump seven or eight feet.

1:48:54And I'm renting this house. I'm not going to go out and build a wall. I couldn't build anything. I told you, you don't build it. You hire Mikey to do it. You guys, you just hire help. They can do it. It's not going to cost that much. Mikey's out in front of Home Depot every Saturday. I mean, just say Mikey. Hook a brother up. I'm getting a pen and paper out right now to see what I need to do. You're going to write this down? Yeah. Chain link fence? No, they can jump over them. Make it high. M1 Eddie says he knows what to do. What do you do, Eddie? Hey, how are you guys doing today? Good. So I grew up in a rural Escondido over by Lake Hodges. Yeah. And there's tons and tons of communities. We've lost, I don't know how many cats, but what my parents, they don't have a fence. They have motion sensor, like these crazy spotlights. And basically what they do is that after dark, they keep their dogs inside because it doesn't matter if they have a fence. Or what? The coyotes will dig under the fence, jump over the fence, and they will nag those little dogs. Oh, yeah. If they want food, they'll get it. But the motion lights seem to help. It kind of scares them off a little bit. Oh, that's a good call. Do they only hunt at night? Generally, yeah. They hunt in packs. Great. Sometimes they'll be out during the day, but it's pretty rare. Well, I heard the exact opposite. I heard that coyotes do not hunt in packs.

1:50:17They only hunt by themselves. That's what I heard. I don't know. People call. M1s know everything. Dude, they do. And, like, I'm really, like, here's the deal. We have a, there's an extra garage. It's kind of in the front of our house. I'm literally thinking about just turning it into, like, a big urine pond for my dogs because I couldn't live if something happened to my dogs from Akai. I would be the end of me. M1 Melody? calling because I wanted to tell Woods, no offense, but you're being a pansy. You're being a little dramatic. Am I? His dogs are his children. Coyotes are nothing. I used to live in Chatsworth next to a reservoir where they were filled with coyotes and they're honestly more scared of you than you are of them. Right. I don't think it's me that I'm worried about. I'm worried about my dogs that are tiny and they look like, you know, they look like full gras to a coyote. They look like lunch. So make a scarecrow of wood. Make a wood scarecrow? Yeah. Make a really fat, creamy white scarecrow? What if we took a picture of you and we blew it up life-size and put it on cardboard? And you can make it like a scary... How dare you, dude? How dare you? How dare you? I'm trying to throw some ideas. Okay, these are some of the things Jay's friends told me. They go, oh, dude, if you have a dog door...

1:51:40and your dogs are running from the coyote, the coyote will run through the dog door into your home. They've seen it happen. So I don't really think I'm being a pansy. It happens every 100 years, and you're not being a pansy. Okay, let me ask you this. You're being highly dramatic. Who would it happen to? Who would it happen to? If it was going to happen to anybody? I'm afraid. He's actually right about that. Maybe you keep your dogs in a purse in your house. Maybe. Maybe you don't worry about it. I'm not talking to you. Okay, okay, okay. Maybe one of the funniest things I've ever heard. Is it funny? Maybe you keep an impersonation of the house. Okay, but why would they? They only need to go outside to go to the bathroom. And you guys are going to let them outside. Right. But let's say I get up for work at 3. Yeah. And the dog's got to go potty. Yeah. So I let him out at 3. I go back and get in the shower. Put him on a leash. You can't do that. You can't do it. Yeah, put him on a leash and stand there with him. And walk him in my backyard. Yeah. With a rifle under my arm. Where do you keep your pantyhose? Maybe that's a small enough area. How dare you? Are there hawks? How dare you? Are there hawks over there too? Yeah, there's hawks too. Because hawks is another thing you need to worry about. It's perfect, man. It's a great place, by the way. Maybe at night with little dogs where you live, you keep them on a leash and then during the day you let them run around and do the thing. How often are you even up at night? We go to bed at like 8. I don't. He doesn't. Well. You know what I mean?

1:52:57Mikey hates it. Yeah, you don't either. Missed 10.30 on Facebook last night. What? I was not on it. You were on Facebook last night at 10.30? No, I was fast asleep at 10.30. 10 o'clock. Wow. On what post did you see? No, I remember seeing that. It was like days ago. It was last night. No, it wasn't. Talk to Pepper about being awake. Maybe talk to Woods about being a liar. Talk to Woods about being a liar. 7.54 a.m. Oh, he's looking. Let's not tattle. Everyone made it into work. M1. Mark is on the line. Hi, Mark. What up? Hey, guys. So I've lost two chihuahuas and like three cats. Oh, look at Woods. You just flipped Woods out, Mark. He is flipping out right now. But there is, like, basically, man, all you have to do is you've got to build, like, a chain-link fence. They can't jump over any chain-link fence. I've never heard that. They're like tiny, scraggly little dogs. Jay says they can. Jay says they jump seven or eight feet.

1:54:05Were you messing with me? No, no. I've had friends that have six foot. We have like a six foot tall fence. But the thing is that we dig it underneath the ground about a foot or two. So they can't actually dig underneath it. Consider it done. And I'm going to put electric charge into it too. Isn't that what I just told you and you gave me a hard time? Yeah, that will do it. I just told you to do that. Okay, let me ask you this. Let's say I have a shotgun and I see a kite in my backyard. Can I shoot it? Absolutely you can. Really? Yes. Yes. But the problem is... I don't know if you can. No, wait, wait, wait, wait. The problem he would run into with that, and a cop can call and tell us, but I think the problem is... discharging a firearm in city limits. Okay, maybe I get a really high-powered BB gun. Yeah, what if it's a BB gun? I mean, it won't kill it. It would just scare it. Then the other coyotes, they'll get popped a couple times. They'll go back and be like, you don't want to go by that crazy dude. All you have to do is run out. He sits up there and waits with his BB gun. They'll be like, this is a dress. They will only attack things that are smaller than them. So if Woods just comes out and says, get, they'll get. That's exactly what he'd do. Hey, you coyotes, get. You better be careful, Mikey. They might get you, dude.

1:55:11Oh, Frankie. They only get stuff smaller than them. It's 8 a.m. right now, right? What's 10 hours ago? What would that be? That'd be 10 o'clock last night. Weird. Lauren O'Brien for sure coming back 10 hours ago. Really? She looked at you right now with Manson lamps. The prosecution rests, Your Honor. Thank you very much. What did he just say? For sure coming back 10 hours ago? That's what you said. At 10 o'clock, I said you were up. I was not up. Maybe your clock is set differently. Maybe Matt was on your computer sniffing around sending Facebook. Maybe we all... Yes, you were. I got a post from you. What's happening? Order in court. She's badgering the witness, Your Honor. Hey, you know what? I am the witness. Never mind that. Listen to Woodsy. Is it going to scare him? Oh, yeah. Okay, I'm ready. Fire away, dude. Bring your worst. His face is already pale. This is the worst. M1 Heather. Hey, how's it going? It's great. Well, I'm sorry to tell you that your problem just isn't going to be coyotes. It's going to be owls. And most likely owls because they're out at night. My friend had a small dog and she let it go to the bathroom and she heard it squealing outside and the hawk took, it was actually an owl, picked up her dog and took it.

1:56:37Hang on. I got an idea. Not funny, Frankie. I will come over. I will come over. I'll live with you. I'll do it. I will come and live with you. And I will watch. I will serve and protect you and the dogs. I will do whatever it takes. I will put my life on the line. Done. Thank you. Frank, are you bigger than the coyote, though? Yeah, I am. Okay. And I will fight. I will fight for his honor. Oh, my God. What is this, a karate kid, too? That's good. You're going to have to do that. My friend, my other friend, also. You have a lot of friends. The stuff. Went to go wild. She's prom queen. Shh. Guys, shut up. God. Woods is freaking out. You let her talk? I was kicked out of school, if you really want to know. But anyway, she was attacked by about five coyotes when she's walking her golden retriever, and they took her golden retriever away. That's what she could do. That was in a more rural area, though. That was like Ramona, but the owl thing. I'm telling you what, I'm going to have a freaking arsenal by my door. What about your lab that you have? You have a big dog, too. I've got a lab, too. Well, he'll be the protector. Obviously not. Phone lines are blowing up right now.

1:57:59Well, they don't need to, man. We got a solution. Here's the deal. For any of you guys that literally have some solutions, I don't want to hear your stories because it's going to bum me out. Tent to the backyard. Email me. Email me at woods at mikeyshow.com for some viable solutions. I don't want to hear about your dog that got taken. Seriously. Why are we still talking about this, dude? It's a solution that's already been given. I am the solution. You're the enforcer. Frankie. Frankie. Frankie. Frankie. Frankie. Frankie. Woodsy's picking the music today. You know that. Crew. Pop it in. Turn it on. Be a part of the Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949. Or text 949-MIKEY at Gene McCom. This is the Mikey Show. More coming up on FM 94.9. This is the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar.

1:59:03Well, next Thursday night at the Casbah, you can go see A Place to Bury Strangers and The Big Pink. Both bands, huge both bands, playing together at the Casbah. That's on the 15th. See us at House of Blues April 19th. Same night, Taylor Hawkins of the Foo Fighters will play the Casbah with his other band, the Coattail Riders. And again, April 19th. Transfer plays the belly up Thursday, April 29th. Broken Bells are kicking off their U.S. tour at Humphreys on May 18th. That show goes on sale this Saturday at 10 a.m. And Delta Spirit will play the belly up on June 8th. So there you have it. Get out there. The FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar can be heard four times daily. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar at FM949SD.com. The Drew Ford Used Car and Truck Superstore is having a huge sales event all month long. Drew is offering over 80 quality pre-owned Fords, Volkswagens, Hyundais, Nissans, Hondas, and more. All red tag discount price for this special sale. Every used vehicle comes with a Drew Value limited warranty. 12 months or 12,000 miles. See Drew for details. But shop early online at DrewFord.com or at the store where the I-8 and the 125 meet in La Mesa.

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2:01:51Real results guaranteed. Ovation works. Your United States 2010 census form may be on its way in the mail or may have arrived at your home along with your Uncle Fred. Good to see you. Cousin Ann. Hey, we're here. Her husband Matt. Hey. The twins. This is awesome. And their cat Fluffy. all who may be moving in with you because of situations beyond their control. So it's important when you fill out your 2010 census that everyone living in your household is counted, including family members or friends who have no other place to stay, as well as babies and foster children. The 2010 census provides benefits that really hit home, such as funding for job training and health care. So make sure everyone living in your home is included on your 2010 census form. Together, we can move forward when everyone living with you is counted and you nail it back. United States 2010 Census. It's in our hands. Paid for by U.S. Census Bureau. For more information, visit 2010census.gov. That's 2010census.gov. In Baja, Mexico, there's really only one season, and it's beach season.

2:02:59In that spirit, Rubio's introduces fresh new salads dedicated to preserving your surfish figure, like the balsamic and roasted veggie salad. Grilled peppers and fire-roasted corn, walking hand-in-hand on the beach with crisp romaine and flame-grilled chicken. Splashed with a light balsamic vinaigrette featuring extra virgin olive oil. New salads, Beach Mac style. Only at Rubio's Fresh Mexican Grill. Don't just aim for the top. Start there. Business Week ranks the University of San Diego's Evening MBA program as one of the top 30 in the nation and gives our faculty an A-plus for teaching quality. I'm Casey Hayes, Director of MBA Admissions at the University of San Diego. If you're looking to advance your career with an MBA from a program that's highly ranked for student satisfaction and academic quality, visit us at sandiego.edu slash MBA. Don't just aim for the top. Start there. Attention to all Americans struggling with medical bills and credit card debt. Due to the economic crisis, a program approved by the United States government now may eliminate 100% of your medical bills and credit card debt entirely.

2:04:05This program is now available to the general public through the Chapter 7 Federal Bankruptcy Act and here to offer Americans a fresh start during these hard economic times. We have one goal in mind with this program, and that is to allow Americans to keep their homes, cars, and personal property while eliminating 100% of your debts for good. For more information and to see if you qualify for this government-approved program, call the American Bankruptcy Hotline today, 800-304-0661. Over 1.5 million Americans are expected to take advantage of this opportunity this year alone. While the economy is getting worse and worse, there is no better time than now to file bankruptcy on your debts and walk away from 100% of it for good through this program. For more information, call America's Bankruptcy Hotline now. 800-304-0661. 800-304-0661. Again, that's 800-304-0661. 60 days. A lot can happen in 60 days. You can plant some tomatoes and watch them bloom. Make a new friend. Add that final touch of genius to your screenplay. And now, 60 days is how much time you have to get the Lexus of your dreams at the 60 to 0 certified pre-owned sales event. Through June 1st, every Lexus model comes with 1.9% APR financing and attractive lease rates, which means the one you want is the one on sale. Hurry to the Lexus 60 to 0 certified pre-owned sales event because a lot can happen in 60 days. Like someone else getting the Lexus you want first. See your Lexus dealer.

2:05:32Carlsbad, El Cajon, Escondido, or Kearney Mesa. Or visit LexusCPO.com. 36 monthly payments of $28.60 per thousand financed. Call 1-800-USA-LEXUS for important APR program limitations and offer details. Only a limited number of customers will qualify. No down payment required if qualified. Offer ends June 1, 2010. Make sure your low fares stay low to St. Louis with no bag fees from Southwest Airlines. Grab your bag. It's on nonstop from San Diego to St. Louis starting May 9th. Book your nonstop flights to St. Louis now at Southwest.com. Weight and size limits apply. This report is brought to you by Kaiser Permanente. Kaiser Permanente, Southern California, has earned a combined total of 8 out of 8 stars for clinical care and member satisfaction. That's in the recent HMO quality report card from the California Office of the Patient Advocate, Kaiser Permanente. thrive on the 52 westbound after the 805 we've got an accident over on that right shoulder two cars involved they're waiting on a tow truck right now and looks like the five southbound before sixth avenue watch out there's still a ladder here it's in the number three lane there's a car pulling over to the right shoulder after it hit the ladder those things are really they destroy your windshield the whole thing so be careful as you approach there this report is brought to you by account temps providing clients with cost-effective staffing solutions to their peak accounting and finance workload needs you can call or visit them at account temps.com

2:06:49An equal opportunity employer. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. How do you like that? A little slaughter? Did you ever think you'd hear the day? No. You ever think you'd hear slaughter again? I loved them. I did too. I'm so embarrassed. Let it roll for a minute. This guitar is my favorite. Used to drive my little Toyota pickup. With a cassette, with a boombox that the speakers came off on each end. So I would put one speaker here, one speaker here. Ready? Woodsy and I were talking about the 80s the other day. And we were talking about how unabashed they were at being lame and just not caring. They did not care. They didn't care. They cared about what they looked like because that was the style of the day. But their music wasn't like...

2:08:21I hate my father, and I want to die. It was like, I'm going to go party, and I'm going to score some chicks, and I'm going to do this. But that wasn't lame then. That was cool. That was like, so Mike and I were talking. I go, dude, if you could live in any time period of music, what would it be? And he asked me, and I go, dude, easy. 80 to 85 Sunset Strip, L.A. He wouldn't have survived. I said you wouldn't have lived. You wouldn't have made it. Dude, I'd be leaning against a building right now with a tin cup in my hand. Right. There was no way. He just wasn't made for that time. He would have not have made it. I would have loved it so much. Me and Bauman just ripping the Sunset Strip. Forget it. Going to see Rat, then Poison, and hanging out with the crew. Done. I would have been on Sunset Strip in the early 70s. Yeah, see, that would be more your scene. 570-1949 is our number. Don't forget, we're going to be meeting with you on Friday. We're going to hang out with you. The Mikey Show is doing it. This is our first meet and greet. It's the first time that we've got out to meet everybody. It'd be awesome. With these fingers all messed up. And we're going to be giving away our new sticker. If you want to see the sticker, go to MikeyShow.com and you can see the new sticker. It's really, really cool. We're going to be giving you that sticker and you can get a few of them. But while supplies last, when they're gone, they're gone. We're going to bring a certain amount out there. And when they're gone, they're gone. Speaking of dogs, I have been trying to work out.

2:09:52Lose weight, which, by the way, I've gained three pounds. I saw that in your vlog. I started dying. It's all muscle, Mike. It's all muscle. I started dying. Muscle weighs twice as much as fat. Oh, yeah. You definitely see it. It's true. It's so great. I have to jump around in the shower just to get wet. It's how skinny I am. It's muscle, Mike. What? What does that mean? Move that microphone so I can see you. I'm so skinny, I have to jump around in the shower just to get wet. I'm like, oh, they can't even find me in here. Yeah, move the mic out of the way so I can see you. I know. I have to move the microphone just so it gets so skinny. And so I decided to go on a walk and I'm walking and I stepped in dog do. Oh, sure. You loved that. Oh, I was so mad. I could just see you like, oh, really? It stinks so bad once you step in it. It stinks so bad. You have to go home. It stinks so bad. Right when you step up, you're like, oh, God. It's like a bomb. It's a bomb. Because you've released everything. You've re-released everything. And then once you get back home, you're like, what do I do? What do you do? I have to take my shoes off. I don't ever want these shoes coming in the house again. Yeah, you know what you got to do? You got to turn the hose on. Honey, we have an old toothbrush I can use. Worse when you're barefoot. It sticks in the treads. It's so bad. You do.

2:11:10You know what you do? We throw them away. Yeah, why don't you just throw them away, you guys? I mean, that's problem solved, obviously. Never have to smell it again. It irks me that people just don't pick it up in the first place. That's the part that gets me. It's like, who's walking their dog? Why are you making that thing? I have before. Yeah, really, that surprises me. You've let your dog do? Yeah, do they not do that in Perfect Town? They don't do that? Really? Really? Yeah, they don't do that in Perfect Town? Don't leave. It gets in our ocean. It gets in our sea. Drinking water. Obviously, because I had a cup of water here that it hits like dirt. It's your fault. I just moved here. I don't even have my dogs here. It's going to be your fault. They're not even here. It's going to be your fault. You don't leave dew behind. Here's the deal, dude. I've always had backyards. My dogs poop in my backyard. I don't go out there and pick it up. It's my backyard. You sit naked in your house. It's your home. I know, but the backyard is all... It's my backyard. So you got mud pies all over back there? Dude, if I want to cook meth in my backyard, I can't. It's my backyard. But it's still grody, dude. That's another me. Are you going to have company over? Do you have company over?

2:12:20Yeah, I have company over. Let's go in the backyard, guys. But we're not out throwing the barbecue in the backyard. We're not out throwing the football around. It doesn't matter. E. coli travels. Oh, for the love of God. It does. I have a few droppings in my backyard right now. Yeah, you have a dog? I mean, I'll get to him eventually. I mow over him. Yeah, usually Todd just mows over him. You mow? Yeah, it's fertilizer. It sucks it right up. No, it is not fertilizer. It is fertilizer. What do they use? It gets down into the... It's not treated. They don't use dog poop. Yeah, they don't use dog poop. Can I like the bag of dog poop fertilizer, please, for my vegetables? I'll give you a perfect example. We went to the dog beach at Del Mar. Of course, we've walked Penny 30 times. Right when we get on Del Mar Dog Beach, she stops and... No, it's a weird reaction. We did it, but I'll tell you what we did. We searched around until we found like a little gum wrapper. There's bags there. We didn't see any. So we picked it up and we threw it away, obviously. Good for you. Well, yeah. I mean, if it's on, it's like a public, public place. Yeah.

2:13:20But if I'm walking in a field and my dog poops, I'm not going to pick it up. Totally different. Okay, how about you're the guy walking your dog around the block? I know you don't walk, but if you did, and your dog poops in my yard, do you give it the look around? Yeah, you have to look around. If I'm not there, they don't pick it up. Absolutely. I did that yesterday. Absolutely. If somebody has... I did that yesterday. No! It's just poop, you guys. Everybody does it. It wasn't... Jay's looking at me like, what's going on? It wasn't on their yard. But it was on the street. My dog does a weird thing. She poops on the street. Mine do, too. Oh, worse. I will tell you something in 100% honesty. I know I'm going to sound like a hippie. I know I'm going to sound like I'm over the top here. That's weird. If a kid picks up that poop and puts their hand in their mouth or you somehow, that can kill a child. Are there a lot of kids around eating poop out of people's yards? No, but they could. They could. Are you honestly right now suggesting to me? E. coli. I mean, I'm with you. You can get E. coli poisoning, and that can kill a child. Yes. Can you imagine if Pepper decided that she was going to make this her cause, like kids picking up dogs and poop? No, what I'm saying. What would that poster look like? They had two members. Two members. They don't even have to pick it up and eat it. It can get, if it's anywhere near a source of water, drinking water, groundwater.

2:14:40There it is. I love her so much. We're Easter egg hunting in our yard. We're Easter egg hunting in our yard. Jasper's going for an egg, and what's next to it? Poop. A giant pile from somebody else. Really? Did he mistake it for the egg and pick it up? No, he didn't. Did he mistake it for candy in here? Did he think it was a pork chop and eat it? No, but it can get on the egg, and he's six or seven years old. He doesn't think, I'm going to need to wash my hands, because if I put my hands near my mouth. He was like, oh, my goodness. Is this Yorkshire pudding, or is this? Or is this? Because I can't tell. It can get on the egg. Is this a roast beef sandwich from Togo's? Because I can't tell. It looks just like a turkey fresh out of the oven. He has a dog. He knows the difference. Yeah, but it can get on the egg, the littlest, tiniest speck. Why do you think people get mysterious stomach flus and stomach viruses all the time? It's poop. Jay. Hostess cupcake. Jay. Those are good. Ding dong. Yes, sir. You have Bear in the backyard. Yep, got him in the backyard. Do you go pick up his poop every day? Kim does. She does? Yes, absolutely. Every day? Every day she goes out. What does she do with it? She bags it up. Boils it, sterilizes it. Bags it up and then ties it off and throws it away in the trash can. Yep. Every day. What's it like in Perfect Out? Yeah, how?

2:15:53Perfect Village. You guys got any houses for around over there? Well, you know why? Because I have kids running around in my backyard. I've got five dogs. They step in it. It would be a full-time job. There are kids running around in my backyard, too. If there's one just chilling, it's not going to kill us. They know to not step on it. Remember when you're a little kid and you'd be at your buddy's house playing in the yard and you're like, oh, dude, I stepped in poo. Oh, so you're just trying to contribute to the good memories of... Of stepping in poop. Yeah. You're like, hey, listen, if I didn't do this, other kids generations from now won't be able to be able to have some stories about stepping in it. Bro, people didn't flip out about everything. But not everybody had a dog back then either. I didn't have a dog. You just said it would be a full-time job. What do you think parenting is? You said that your dogs are like your kids. Are we comparing parenting to picking up poop? No, but you said picking up after your dog would be a full-time job. We have five dogs. But you said your dogs are like your children. They are. Parenting is a full-time job. Fair enough. So you have to accept the responsibility. It's not my responsibility. If my kid pooped in the yard, that's why. I mean, if I could put diapers on my dogs, I would. If your kid pooped in the yard, you wouldn't pick it up. But dogs are supposed to poop in the yard.

2:16:57Children are not. Exactly. Dogs are supposed to be in the wild, not domesticating people's houses. We have. In the wild. You've put diapers in? Yeah. When Sonny was a puppy, he peed on everything. So they have little diapers and we put a little diaper. And girl dogs, they have that time of life. They have the... You put a diaper on them. I'm just saying, if we're going to domesticate animals like that, we have to take the responsibility of picking up after them. They're not, like... Not in my yard, I don't. I don't have to do anything I don't want to do in my yard. Well, you don't have to do it. I always keep a courtesy, like, grocery store bag just on the leash. Or on the leash. Yeah, for sure, man. M1 Servant Warrior. Are you there? Yeah, I'm here. Sorry, my phone was doing some weird thing. I'm blind. I have a guide dog. I can't see anything. I pick up my dog's poop every time. That's rad, dude. Look at that. Woods was like, see? There you go. And then you said it, and he was like, oh, wait. No, that's... It's different, though. Why is that different? Because your dog helps you get around. My dog stay in my backyard. Here's the thing, Woods. Here's the thing. I love you. Actually, I think it's awesome you're on the show. Eject. Eject. Uh-oh. He's getting that look, though. Let him finish. Here's the thing. Legally...

2:18:06The state of California, I'm the only one who actually gets a pass legally. Legally, I actually don't have to pick up my dog's poop, but I still do it every time. Great. In my yard, I have to pick up my dog's poop. It's a hazard, dude. In my yard, I have to pick up my dog's poop. No, you don't. You're telling me legally I have to pick it up. Listen to him. Not legally. If he tells me legally Woods, you have to pick it up, I'll pick it up. One pile of poop in the corner of the yard. Yeah, but. You know, after a while, have you ever been to a buddy's house that doesn't pick up his dog's poop? Yeah, my house. It creates flies. It creates all kinds. If I got to live next to you, dude, I mean, come on, man. I have a question. How does he pick it up? I don't know. Because he can smell it, I'm sure. Yeah. But are you just going to be like, you know, how do you do that? How do you do it? Here's the thing, like, because whenever I relieve my dog, you know, it's on a leash, right? Yeah. Right. So I can follow the leash. Follow the leash. And I can kind of tell when he's squatting down and not moving around. Dude, you are committed to that. Bro, and I agree. Hey, I agree with you. If we're walking down, you know, 4th Street downtown and I see a dog poop and the guy just keep blazing, I'm like, dude, pick up that dog poop. But if in my yard, if my dog poops, I'm not running out there to pick it up immediately. Not immediately. I'll mow over it. This is turning into something very violent.

2:19:29And if he's telling me that legally I have to, in my own yard, go out and pick up poop, then I will. He's not telling you that. Everybody's telling you. He just said legally. Environmentally. In a public place. Environmentally. When I live in a park, then I'll pick up my dog poop in the backyard. Eventually, your dog's poop, if the rain comes, will drain to China. And Chinese people that are growing vegetables will suffer. You better eject over here. Oh, no. You guys, I'm not talking about China. I'm talking about our oceans and our groundwater and our air. You know what's funny? You know what's funny? Sienna essentially says the exact same thing as me, and this guy calls me and fillets me. Well, yeah. I mean, I said I leave a couple. I pick them up eventually or else Todd mows them over. Eventually, really? Or else Todd mows them over with a lawnmower. Do you have an appointment book where you're like, oh, 3 o'clock, I have to go back. The gardener. The gardener. Hey!

2:20:25Pick up that poop while you're out there. Just kidding. And stop dropping those jalapeno seeds in my garden. No, I want those jalapeno seeds because the peppers grow. I get texts. Mike, are you busy tomorrow afternoon? No, no, no. How do you feel about picking some stuff up at my house? I do pick it up all the time. If the dog goes in someone's yard, I will pick it up. But every once in a while, I'll leave a couple on the street because there's cars coming and she goes on there and I just, whatever, like it's run over by a tire. M1s, call in. Make it right on Sienna like you make it right on me. I'm sorry. It's ridiculous. I'm not perfect. Who wants to earn a burrito? I can go get some chimichangas. Who wants a fresh churro? I can brew up some real nice cold horchata. Who wants menudo? I've got some dog poops with your name all over it. I need the perfect little brown hands to pick them up. M1 Sanjaya. What up, brother? What's up? Hey, I don't know if Woodsy has patience for this, but...

2:21:35I wanted to suggest litter box training. My dog was litter box trained. I've got five, though, dude. Tell me about this, because I've been thinking about that, actually, and I didn't know if that's weird to have your dog do, because the second I take my dog to the beach, something about that sand makes her go immediately. I mean, immediately. Well, it's not sand that they use. It's actually, they're like these little, I would say, little mini, mini little tiny log-looking things. I don't know, some sort of fiber or something. Have you just not been cleaning yours? Yeah, yeah. That said it right there. Thank you, Sandhya. Great train. Woodsy is picking the music today. Barking them in. Sienna wrote something in her recap. Is this a friend of yours? Is that what it is? Yeah, my friend's brother. Pretty crazy. This is going to polarize people. You're either going to be okay with this or you're not going to be okay with this.

2:22:38We'll read it to you next. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Honey, wait! Oh, hey! I was, uh... About to make a big hole in our living room wall. It's for our new safe. What new safe? The one we're going to put all of our money in. But our money's already safe. It's San Diego County Credit Union. Yeah, but how do you know... San Diego County Credit Union's been around for over 70 years. Okay. They have over $4.5 billion in assets. Wow. And their deposits are insured to at least $250,000 by the National Credit Union Administration. Guess we don't really need a safe. We have San Diego County Credit Union. San Diego County Credit Union has been a solid, reliable place to save and grow since 1938. We offer savings, checking, certificates, IRAs, and more. We've also been voted Best Credit Union by the San Diego Union Tribune Readers Poll. And anyone living or working in San Diego, Riverside, and Orange Counties is welcome. San Diego County Credit Union now has over 200,000 customers and many convenient branch locations. Open your account online in minutes at sdccu.com.

2:23:53The biggest party in the desert returns. Coachella, the most critically acclaimed music festival in the U.S. The Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival featuring some of the most groundbreaking artists in music today, including Jay-Z, Muse, Gorillaz, LCD Sound System, Face No More, Them Crooked Vultures, Siesto, Tom York, Vampire Weekend, MGMT, Phoenix, and many more. Three days, over 130 artists on multiple stages. Friday, April 16th, Saturday, April 17th, and Sunday, April 18th at Empire Polo Club in Indio, California. Tickets are on sale now at all Ticketmaster locations and Coachella.com.

2:24:45For more information, go to Coachella.com. Produced by Golden Voice. In this episode of Mossy Nissan's Dare to Compare, the reliable Nissan Altima takes on Challenger Toyota Camry in a race to the finish. The catch, they each get just one gallon of gas. And here comes the stylish Nissan Altima 2.5 S cruising in for the win. Hey! Congratulations, Team Ultima. Oh, yeah, thanks, man. It was easy. Our Ultima gets better city MPG than that Camry. Car is sweet. Yeah, just like you, babe. And here comes Team Camry, trying to push their Camry LE over the finish line. What happened, guys? Our Camry ran out of gas. Uh, you ran out of gas. Don't start. Not now. Why wait? Dare to compare today and get a new 2010 Nissan Altima 2.5 S with auto, AC, and more for only $18,995 net cost at all six Massey Nissan locations. For 13-110 with 22-735 MSRP or last $19,995 zone.

2:25:47Price max $1,000. Factory rebate comparison between similar Ultima 2.5 S and Toyota Camry LE. Six of this net cost. EPA estimated city MPG. End Sunday. Caesar. Hey, Caesar Gonzalez. I went by Mama Testas and the corn tortillas. They're the way to go. Tell me about the Yucatecos. We take pork. We marinate it for 24 hours in anato paste and orange juice. Then we wrap it up in roasted banana leaves and we steam it for six more hours. Standard pork, sweet, sour, and spicy all at the same time. That sounds yummy, Chico. Tell me about the Mojaros de Carne. Mojaros de Carne, dude? Their roll tacos are Guerrero style. They're serving a spicy beef broth. If you have one too many... Ruskies? They're the cure for the hangover, bro. Okay, now, Flavio, tell me how you beat that Bobby Flay guy from the Food Network. Bobby Flay? He challenged me to a fish taco throwdown. But did you win? Go on that way. I'm Cesar Gonzalez from Mamatesta. Of course I won. If he challenged me to a cabbage and potato soup, he would have had a chance. Hey, jefe, you're here legally. Listen, Sancho, I'm on my test that we do everything you can do to the taco. We fry them, we steam them, we grill them, we stew them. Come into Mamatesta and I will show you authentic Mexican food like you never tested, Pedro de Maiz. Mamatesta Taqueria, University Avenue and Richmond. in Hillcrest. Mama Testa is my one-stop shop for real Mexican food. See you later. Ay, ay, ay. What have I done? Stay tuned for a million bottle giveaway announcement. Do you have troubled skin? Acne? Well, against the better judgment of our management team, we're going to prove to you once and for all that Proactiv works. So if you want to try it, give us a call because we're going to let a million people try Proactiv and receive our legendary refining face mask free if you call right now.

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2:28:34While the economy is getting worse and worse, there is no better time than now to file bankruptcy on your debts and walk away from 100% of it for good through this program. For more information, call America's Bankruptcy Hotline now. 800-304-0661. 800-304-0661. Again, that's 800-304-0661. After reading, after discussing, after searching, you realize that at this school, you don't memorize the answers to questions. You ask them. The Rady School of Management at UC San Diego. Innovators under construction. Learn more at rady.ucsd.edu. This report is brought to you by the Juvenile Diabetes Foundation. The Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation is accelerating the crucial research that represents the hope for a cure. Please call them 1-800-533-CURE or go to jdrf.org. Escondido on the 15 southbound Mission Road. Watch out, kind of chunky right now. Big chunks of tire tread in the slow lane. And the 5 southbound before 6th Avenue, they just cleared that. There was a ladder in the number 3 lane, but they've got that incident cleared, so you should be able to get through. And the 8 westbound before East Main Street.

2:29:38There's a big bag of mulch that's in the number four lane. Encinitas on the five southbound between La Costa Avenue, Manchester Avenue. Pretty much stop and go right now. This report brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners, there is no better time to visit your neighborhood Toyota dealership for your maintenance. State-of-the-art technology, factory-trained technicians, and those competitive prices. They'll have you smiling with confidence. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Here's more of the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Randy the Ram. What was his name? Randy the Ram. Robinson. Randy the Ram Robinson. Great movie. Great. Bang Your Head, Quiet Riot. Today, Woodsy's picking all the music. It's a great 80s mix. So far, Guns N' Roses, Mr. Brownstone, Saga on the Loose, Rush Working Man, Rat Lay It Down, Poison Life Goes On, Metallica Seek and Destroy, Motley Crue Looks a Kill, Slaughter Up All Night, Ozzy Bark at the Moon, and Quiet Riot, Bang Your Head. Came out of the closet, dude.

2:30:53And I've revealed myself as the metal head that I am. So far, I've known one song. Which one? Mr. Brownstone. That's it? Yep. I'm so glad I'm not alone. That was it for you? I didn't know that one. I don't think I've known even any of them. Wow. You don't know Bang Your Head? No, that one sounds familiar from The Wrestler because I did see that movie. But the other ones, no? Do you know that metal health will actually drive you mad? That's right. Metal health will drive you mad. What is that? What's metal health? Metal health is when you go, you're listening to metal so much. That it'll drive you mad. That it drives you mad. No, because it's mental health, they think it's funny that it's metal health. Just let it go. Just let them keep going. Like that, isn't that what they use? Isn't that some things that they use for like, like, yes. Yes. I don't know, hostage situations or like to defuse. Yeah, they use metal health. Kevin Dubrow flies over to Afghanistan. And makes it right with the hostages. No, but... Oh, he's dead. Sorry. What's that... The people down in Waco, didn't they try to get them out with heavy metal? Yeah, they did. And it drove them... Whatever. The reason they're not answering us is because they don't know themselves. There was no way to get out of that. There was no way to get out of that without getting skewered. Do you guys know? Because if you go, what's the matter with you? It doesn't mean anything. It's from the cover of a quiet riot album. Then you're a condescending jerk.

2:32:20If you go back. This is hilarious. This is so funny. Gosh. Now I get it. But if you say. That's a Woods laugh. I like it. Do you see? Do you see? I quit. We'll fight back. You were done. We were done from the second she said, what is metal help? We were done. But now I get it. So it's funny. She does a good Woods laugh. Wow. Do you guys really know what it is? Because you're not answering. Yes. Metal health is what they used down in Waco when they were trying to get the Branch Davidians to get out. Really? Just say yes. Say yes. Let's move on. M1 Colby wrote us and they are doing something really cool I want to let people know about. He's a firefighter, paramedic. Now we got Pepper and Sienna back.

2:33:27Firefighter and paramedic with the Alpine Fire Department. How you doing? They're looking for a car for a demolition derby that they're doing to benefit the Burn Institute. Now, this is really cool. What they say is he's been trying to contact all these wrecking yards and stuff like that. No luck. They need a 70s or 80s large American car that'll run with a little help. He says, I know you have some pool with the San Diego area. I listen every day going to and from work. Can we get a plug on this great event? All proceeds go to the Byrne Institute and all participants are local firefighters. I like it. The event takes place at the Del Mar Fairgrounds June 19th. And that's from M1 Colby. Now we have his information if somebody can donate a 70s or 80s American car that will run with a little help. Give his picture. Mikey, I'd give you a car, but they don't want a Bentley. So they need something from the 70s or 80s. American. My car's too nil. What's that? I have four Volvos, seven Mercedes, two BMWs. I got three in my Easter basket. How about a Fabergé egg? Will they take that? Will they take a gold? A diamond Fabergé egg to drive around in.

2:34:52Somebody's got a clunker that they can throw. I'm so glad. Because I want to go watch them beat the hell out of this thing. That'd be awesome. I love that stuff. Call us if you do. 570-1949. And then listen to this. So this is from Sienna's Recap. She says, had a very interesting phone conversation yesterday with a friend of mine from Santa Barbara. She was telling me her 13-year-old brother got caught cheating on a test in his class. Her parents were furious, to say the least, and they punished him in a way I've never heard of. They made him... Stand at an intersection right by his school for an hour before school holding a sign that said, Hi, I'm Jeremy, and I'll never cheat again on a test. This is a busy intersection by his school right before school started. How humiliating. I can't believe they made him do that. Now, see, I've heard of judges ordering humiliating things. Yeah, Texas all the time. Judges, he's 13. Yeah, his parents are the judge and the punishment. levied out was that he stand there with a sign that says, my name's Jeremy, I'll never cheat again on a test. My guess is Jeremy will never cheat again on a test. Probably. That is my guess. Yeah, he's also never going to get a girlfriend. Well, kind of makes him a bad boy. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, right? He should have been blasting Marburg while I was out there holding that sign. He's going to be made fun of. People are going to be like, hey, your mommy. That's the point. He's going to get filleted when he goes to school. They're going to be like...

2:36:17Okay, but right in front of the school, like, really? Is this necessary? A busy intersection? Like, could he have done this, like, in front of his house? Oh, yeah. I like it. I like it, too. You guys! You're in on that? That's so mean. She's very Sheriff Joe, so I'm in. Yeah, that's true. No, I just, I think at a certain, I mean, they have to be a certain, I wouldn't do that to, like, maybe an eight-year-old. There has to be an age of reason, you know, that they can make the distinction between right and wrong, and, okay, I'm going to deliberately cheat, even though I know it's wrong. Is this wrong? 570-1949-949-mikey at gmail.com to text us. That's how you text us. 949-mikey at gmail.com. Hi, my name. Did he need to put his name on there? Hi, I'm Jeremy, and I will never cheat on a testing. Effective. Effective. Very. There was a guy who actually took over. I got let go of a radio station I was working at, and the promotions director that they hired to replace me, and I put finger quotes in there to replace me. Air quotes. Because that can't happen. He can't be done. You can't replace the best. He came in and he decided that there was a big car giveaway at the college football game. He decided to give it to his mother-in-law, but all on the sly. And the cops were, when the mother-in-law was pulling up to the vehicle at her house, you know, the next day when she'd gone to the dealership to get it, the cops were there waiting. The judge made the guy wear a sign for all the home games for that.

2:37:37for the college football team, saying, I stole the vehicle. I'm, you know, something new. It was just horrible. Wow. All the home games. All the home games? Yeah. In addition to everything else that he got fired. That is mortifying. Jay, would you do that to one of your kids? Oh, absolutely. Jay would do it to them now just for fun. What about Jasper, though? Oh, no, no way. He's too young. No, he didn't know any better. Boy, he'd send Finn out there in a heartbeat. In a heartbeat. Well, Jasper's seven. Seven. And Finn is 17. Finn is 17. So you would do that with Finn, right? But a 13-year-old, that's like seventh grade. They're still trying to figure stuff out on their own. Teenager. It depends on the kid, too. If it's just a real passive kid that gets caught one time, but if it's somebody that's chronic, boy, the hammer would drop. If I'm your kid at 13. My dad probably should have put me on a corner many times. See, here's the thing, though. I think that some punishment works on some kids and some punishment doesn't work on other kids. Like we were having this conversation with some friends of ours that their kid, timeout, nothing. Doesn't do anything for them. Well, you know why? You know what timeout? Like my mom used to go, go to your room. I'm like, cool. I got a TV. I got a Nintendo. Great. Like sending me on vacation. Some kids it doesn't work for. And some kids you can spank them. And they're.

2:38:59Just real defiant. And they're like, I don't care. Do it more. But then that same kid, you put them in a timeout and it's the worst thing you can possibly do to them. If my mom had put me on a street corner with a sign, I'm a clown. Yeah. I would have been juggling on a unicycle. I'd have juggled it. My friends would have been there laughing. I'd have been laughing and holding it up like a goofball. But that's. Another point, too, is maybe he's just like, screw you guys. I'll just keep doing it, too. I got out of this. I can't believe you guys made me do this. This is ridiculous. And then be mad. That could be it. M1 Terry's on the line. Hi, Terry. It's scary, but anyways. Did you say scary? Yeah, scary. Scary. M1 Scary. Hi, Scary. Boo. I was going to say, I got caught tagging a bathroom when I was in, like, the third grade. I was living in Mexico. And the principal. made me, you know, go into the bathroom and scrub the walls. And, you know, I actually didn't end up cleaning anything. She just gave me like a rag and, you know, a bucket of water. But the embarrassing factor of like she and she was standing outside the bathroom like nobody could come in while I was doing it. It was so embarrassing. And she never told my parents, never nothing. But she knew that I was never.

2:40:15going to write on a bathroom wall again. And up to this day, I see funny things written on, you know, bathroom stalls at, you know, bars or whatever. I never get the sensation. Right? It was so embarrassing. There you go. There you go. It worked. Did you guys ever have to write lines? Write sentences? Uh-uh. Like Bart Simpson? Dude, yeah. It's exactly. We used to have to go with those giant blackboards and we would have to write a hundred times, I will not talk during class. Right, right. And by the end, your hand, you're like, oh, I'm sorry. I'll never do it again. I think that there's other, there's, I definitely agree to punish them, obviously, in a good way that they won't do it again. But I just, man, this kid's 13. 13 is such an important time in your life where it just matters. You're friends. You're trying to be cool. You're trying to French all the time. You're trying to French everyone. Just real sweetly. So gross. But maybe trying to be cool is what got him in the trouble of cheating. Yeah, and I think it's a time where you're right. It's a time where you've got to instill. I think you should make him go to tutoring for two hours every day after school or something like that. Obviously, he doesn't want to do that. I think Mikey's right, though. I saw Nanny 911 or one of those shows. I love her. I've seen a couple of those. But she told the parent exactly what you said. She's like, you can't punish your daughter who is eight years old and she's pretty passive the same way you punish your three-year-old who is completely out of control. You have to...

2:41:41Base it on, you know, what you know is going to work for them. And you've got to be consistent with that. Within whatever it is, you've got to stay consistent. What works with Jakey? Oh, man, dude. He doesn't do anything wrong. I'm telling you, all it takes with Jake is you just go, bub, no. If you talk to him like that. You just scared the crap out of me. When you do that, I'm telling you, when you do that, the bottom lip starts going and the eyes fell, which just. Slays you. Slays you. Oh. I mean, I can't even tell you. Like, it hurts me so bad. But does he do anything malicious yet? No, he doesn't do anything malicious. But what he does do is he will know what the right thing is. And he'll do, you know, he'll test the waters a little bit. Rebecca, a big thing with her is that when mommy and daddy are talking, you don't interrupt. And he does. And he knows it. And so, and I don't, I haven't done anything about it. I just like, whatever. You know, I know she she tells him blah, blah, blah. The other day she had told him, told him, told him. And he was in the back seat in his car seat. And I turned around and I went, Bob, no, you do not interrupt. Big bottom lip. Eyes filled up. Killed me. Just killed me. It killed me. I'm like getting misty. I'm telling you, he is the sweetest boy in the world. He's so sweet.

2:43:06And so it's so difficult. But that's his nature. Lukey, very clear that will not work. No. You're going to have to draw and quarter that kid. Luke's going to look at me and go, really, Dad? Really? Oh, I don't. I don't. Nice try. I don't interrupt. Do I not? He's going to be me. Do I not? Yeah, you're going to be Little Woods. Little Woods. I don't, Dad. Don't I? You know the funniest thing? You guys realize I was... Probably the sweetest child in the world. I just I read. I kept myself. I didn't bother anybody. Then my little brother was born and started aggravating me on purpose to get a rise out of me. That's what I turned into a giant. But you still have a heart of gold. Well, for sure. But you're just a character. That's interesting. I want to know more about that because I don't want the boys, Luke and Ryan. to change jay oh they will oh dude okay then what did how did your parents react to it they my my mom used to call my dad my dad would be on business trips and get a call at the mr woods your wife is called seven times and he's like

2:44:12what the hell's going on over there? And my mom's like, I'm giving them both away. You better get home now. I don't think you're going to have a problem with Jake. He reminds me, he's like my brother. My brother was the sweetest and I was the younger one. And as a baby, my nickname was Baby Pterodactyl Mouth. And my nickname in elementary school was the Tasmanian Devil. So I was not exactly the greatest child. And my brother, I mean, when they're just really pure and sweet like that, they don't change. They don't? And I'm sure Woods was sweet, but he... I was the sweetest kid. I know. You got that streak, dude. I was like, I told you guys, my mom used to bribe me, not with TV or candy, with books. If you be a good boy, I'll buy you a new book. Okay, mommy, I'll be a good boy. But that would work now, though. No, not with kids. Give you a new PSP game. No, no, no, I mean with you. Oh, yeah. You're still interested by what you're interested. But the thing is, is I was so sweet. My grandparents, my aunt's uncle was like, he's like, my grandfather's like, you're going to be the president of the United States. You're like the best kid ever. Really? M1 Jen's on the line. Hey. How you doing? Pretty good. How you guys doing? Good. I just have to say, I so agree with pretty much the reason you guys are saying. My daughter, when she was 15, got popped, smoked, and dove at school. She has some boys she likes. She got caught by that he's spotting an instrument to a friend. I can't do it. I know it. I want it so bad. I want to hear what you're saying so bad, Jen, but your phone is breaking up. Like crazy. Oh, crap.

2:45:41I'm in Pomerado Road. That's why. It's better. Obviously. Well, she said that her 15-year-old was caught by smoking pot. Smoking pot. Okay. Go ahead. Can you hear me? Okay. So I made her go to all her friends at school, all the teachers, especially the football coach, and all the people in church that helped to raise her and tell them what she did. Did it work? Oh, my gosh. Grown men were like, oh, my gosh. I can't believe you did that. And so did it work? Did it change anything? You know what? Well, I thought it did until recently. I found out, you know, she's still... I think by the age of 13 and puberty, their brain separates and they're a whole different person. My girl was the sweetest girl growing up. She's still a sweet girl. She's, you know, 21 now. But I'm telling you, during those teenage years, the neurons don't fire correctly. So it sounds like it didn't work. It did. She's totally... She went through like a year of just mess, you know? 16. And then after that, she was like, this is not worth it. You know what I hear? Huh? I hear that boys are really tough when they're little. They drive you nuts. Easier when they're teenagers. Girls. Yeah. Are real sweethearts when they're little. Daddy's little girl. They're little sweeties. They're so sweet. Oh, so sweet. And then they get in.

2:47:06Oh, yeah. 13 years old. Middle school. Teenage girls are a nightmare. That's what I hear. I was one. I was a nightmare. That's what I hear. I don't think, I think I was more of like a boy. Like I was a nightmare when I was little and I was a lot better as I was a teen, but none of my friends were like that. You were okay as a teenager? Yeah, I don't, I don't, well, I did a lot of bad stuff. Yeah. I did a lot of bad stuff, but I never. To my parents, like, they never knew about it until afterwards. Yeah, you were just sneaky. I was real good at being sneaky. God, it scares the crap out of me. But my parents, too, I mean, I never, I mean, I fought with my mom as teenage girls and their mothers do always. But I just, I wasn't like, I was not a problem with them. I took care of my little sisters like you wouldn't believe. So they were so stoked. I don't want my twin boys to turn Jakey. into a little rabble rouser. There's a good shot, dude. There's a good shot because they're going to drive him nuts. Well, then I want to know what the deal is and how to, if they start to drive him nuts, whatever it is that your mom and dad did, I want to do it maybe a different way. Bro, I don't know. The one thing, though, that my brother and I have is we're super tight. And I mean, like, super, super tight. Like, to where other...

2:48:23kids have been like i wish my big brother was i wish we had that relationship you know that my brother and i have um but that just came we just grew up a little bit but what did your mom and dad do when he started doing the annoying stuff to you well i would beat the crap out of him and then it would be my fault for beating him up you know what i mean but i was just sitting there reading a book and he came up and started throwing stuff at me and so i beat the crap out of him put his head maybe that's the answer maybe the answer is that when that happens they the kid that's Doing this stuff has to be disciplined, you know, too, because what happened is you got in trouble. Right. That ain't good. But you're like, this isn't fair. Yeah. That's what we do all the time. We don't let the other kid retaliate. You have to come to us and tell us that there's a problem and we fix it. You are not in charge of fixing the problem. Then I'm a rat, though. Yeah. You're a rat. Then it's either a rat. You're going to get in trouble one way or the other. He was the tattler. Oh, that little. I'm telling you, Mike, you don't need to worry about Jake. He's so sweet. He is a sweetheart. He's going to be okay. He's going to be a troublemaker, too. They're all troublemakers, trust me. Just don't put them in front of the TV. Make them get out there and play. No TV during the week. Bro, sports, I think. Sports, when I lost my way is when I didn't play baseball my senior year because I got an F in chemistry. Some kids aren't into it, though. I wasn't into it. Find something.

2:49:40Something. Cassie and Michelle from the Charger Girls are going to be in here pretty soon. Spit my snuff out. Oh, wow. So great. He's going to spit his snuff out. Where's my cologne? Stop, Woods. Where's my maid? These girls are coming in because they want to get the word out there that there's going to be some Charger Girl tryouts. I've been. Lauren. You have? What's that? For Radio Bit. You did? Yeah. You did? Lauren, can you dance? I can dance, but not like them. You can dance. I can't do the choreographed dances. Those are amazing. Okay. When we come back, I have to ask you about something you wrote in your recap. Oh, yeah. Pepper put something in a recap that I don't even understand, and it actually has to do with dancing. Yeah. And I don't get it. And I even said to her, I go, do you mean this literally? Or do you mean, you mean this figuratively, right? You don't mean this literally. And she goes, oh, yeah, I mean it literally. And I go, oh, wow. So when we come back, I want an explanation. You're not going to make me dance in front of professional cheerleaders, are you? No way. Then you should quiz them on football trivia. Very, very little-known track from Kiss called All-American Man. It's their best. 94.9. The Drew Ford Used Car and Truck Superstore is having a huge sales event all month long. Drew is offering over 80 quality pre-owned Fords.

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2:57:3410th Street at Main Street, an accident here. It's a hit and run. They're just waiting for CHP right now. On the 94 eastbound, this is right before Euclid Avenue, there was a huge rock in the number three lane. It was really tying things up, a lot of congestion, but finally CHP has moved it, so you should be able to get through now. Looks like the 8 westbound between Hotel Circle North and the 5 still stop and go traffic this morning. We're looking at in the teens. This report also brought to you by Ace Hardware. Find some great deals that help turn your spring to-do list into a to-done list. Right now at your Ace Hardware. Sure, get in, get help, get on with your life at Ace, the helpful place. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego, Lincoln Financial Media Station, the new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Once he's picking the music today, that's why today is all 80s air metal. A little talking in my dreams. I mean, it's just, he's killing it. Cassie and Michelle coming in the studio, Charger Girls. And they're going to tell girls how they can try out. It's always fascinating to me. Me too. Because they... I want them to teach me a move. Yeah. Me too. Well, I want to know what Pepper was talking about in her recap. Do we have any gum? Woodsy. Chill out about the Charger Girls. I see them. They're cute.

2:59:06Brunette and a blonde. Your breath stinks. You're fine. Hello. Hi, ladies. How you doing? Hi. How are you? Hey, Michelle. Nice to meet you. How are you? Casey. Hey, Casey. Nice to meet you. Come on in. Come on in. We're going to be talking to you guys in just a second. In fact, first, I want to hear this story about... It actually has to do with dance as well. Can this be... To be continued? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why, you don't want to talk about it? She doesn't want to talk about her dance skills. Are you embarrassed? Yeah. A little bit. She's embarrassed because it has to do with dance and her dancing. The lack thereof. It smells really good in here now. It sure does. Can I get you guys anything? Okay, Woods. Coffee, my apartment. Okay, all right. Take it easy, buddy. Now, we got the charge of girls in here today because... You guys are going to be doing tryouts again, right? Yes. And where are they going to be and when are they going to be? Our auditions are this Sunday. Yeah. So it's April 11th. Yeah. At the Jenny Craig Pavilion. Yeah. At the University of San Diego. Very cool. Now, how long have you been a Charger Girl? And is it Casey? Casey. Casey. How long have you been a Charger Girl? I have been a Charger Girl. This is my third season.

3:00:24But I took a two-year hiatus, so I've been around the Chargers organization for five years. Right. And then I've been a Charger Girl for four seasons. Wow. That's awesome. Now, you have to try out again every year, right? Yes. That's tough. It is tough. And we have now Casey is a brunette. Michelle is a blonde. It's radio. I've got to paint the picture on radio. I'm really liking their voices, by the way. They sound very Sienna-esque. Join the club, ladies. You can come in here anytime. We're made for radio. That's right. When you first tried out, how nervous were you on a scale of 1 to 10? Casey. I was so nervous. I think I was 19 when I tried out. I actually went to USD. And I found out about auditions like two weeks before, and I walked up the hill with my backpack from the dorms. I didn't know what I was doing. I was so nervous. I walk in this room. There's, you know, there's...

3:01:21Four to five hundred beautiful women. They're all gorgeous. What time? It's a closed audition. It is. It's a closed audition. You should go bring the recorder. That's what I did. Really? I'm in media, so maybe. Right. I mean, I am the sports guy. Yeah. It's probably important that I get a credential. I think they keep the creepers out. I think they do something to keep the creepers out. They do? Yeah, I think so. Dude, I'm media. Yeah, media. It's totally fine. Michelle, how about you? Scale of one to ten. I would. Honestly, I would say a five. I was 19 as well, but I had no idea what I was getting myself into. So I really never anticipated all of the amazing experiences that we get to experience every single year. So I kind of just went in there as if it was a dance audition. I've done them before. No big deal. And it was my second year that I was a 10. What is it like to know how to dance? Because I can't. Does that feel good? Does that feel real good to be able to dance? Because Mikey and I danced like this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Woodsy's actually doing a lot better than I would when he was just doing that. But do you even think to yourself like, whoa, I just did a really cool move? Or are you always kind of self-critical? Pretty self-critical, I think. Because we're surrounded by so many amazing dancers. And all the Charger girls, everyone has a different background. You know, we have girls that have it.

3:02:35Big cheer background. Girls that have a very technical background. No, that's not important. I was really trained more in classical and ballet. Is that right? I probably wouldn't be a good fit. You think? You might. Really? Yeah, maybe. You could bring a different aspect to the team. I should tap in vaudeville. I used to do a lot of vaudeville tap. It would be awesome. Yeah, I'd be really good at it. How many really short, bald Mexican guys have been Charger girls? Probably not that many. You'd be the first. I have so many questions, I just am dying to ask them. Go ahead. Like, what's the biggest perk? I would have to say me. Just being able to say. Cadillac Eldorado. No, me. Meeting everybody you get to meet. I mean, there's so many amazing people here in San Diego. you know, abroad. We've been to different countries and it's just being able to get out there and meet people and experience like all these things that we definitely would probably not be able to do if we weren't on Charger Girls. I don't imagine you guys would have trouble meeting anybody ever. Let me talk about this because now I got to talk to you just on the guy's perspective, okay? Because as a guy, you girls are beautiful and like obviously the Charger Girls, for the guys, that's like the coolest thing in the world, you know, the Charger Girls. Okay, so here's my question to you.

3:03:54Do you guys have boyfriends? Dude, they're born with boyfriends. You're born with boyfriends. Those girls are born with boyfriends. We have to get personal. That's how it is. Honestly, that's like the question. We have each other. That's the question. See, I don't think you guys want to say because then you're like, it kind of ruins it for the fellas, right? Does it ruin it? I have an amazing boyfriend. Your boyfriend is so weird. So here's my question. Cassie. Casey. Casey. Sorry. He'll do it. Don't take it personal. He still calls me Sierra. He calls me Pepper and my name's Lauren. He calls me Frank and my name's Steve. Yeah, it's true. He doesn't call me at all. So, Casey. Yes. How does, this is going to seem like a ridiculous question, but I mean this genuinely. I do. How does your boyfriend woo you? Like, how did he, when he met you? Right? Can you tell me where you met? Can you tell me where you met? I'm guessing you didn't meet at Comic Con. That's a guess. That's a guess. That's a guess. But I'm going to say, did you meet him online? See, I bet you didn't meet online. No, I didn't. I bet you didn't do that. No. Meet through a friend. Did you meet through a... I've actually known him since high school, so he's gone way back. See? And he's a huge Charger fan. Nice. Yeah, so...

3:05:13He loves coming to the games, too. Does he get jealous? He's the luckiest guy in the world right now. Does he get jealous? Does he get jealous? Because, like, you're a Charger girl. Every guy in the world is like, you're a Charger girl. No way. He's like, that's my girl with him. He gets to say to his buddies, my chick right there, she's a Charger girl. We're very respectful, you know, classy women. Well, I know. And that's the thing. Well, absolutely. But you're still, every guy loves the Charger girls. Every guy. So it's a win-win for him. Every girl is jealous. No. I'm kidding. I'm jealous. No. Michelle, boyfriend. Okay. Talk to me about when you, let's say you're single. Let's say you're single. Let's say you're single. Let's say you had a boyfriend a couple of years ago when you were a charger girl. Let's talk about it from that angle. Okay. And that keeps everything cool. So when you did have a boyfriend and you were a charger girl. As if I'm single. I don't know. It's a mystery. I know, right? Yes. I know. I think that any guy that you're with. You know, definitely has to be respectful of what you're doing. Right in the microphone. Right in the microphone. You know, we want to be respectful of what they're doing. And, you know, honestly, it's really not that big of a deal. It is. It's a big deal. It's a really big deal. Usually the boyfriends are really excited. I know. That's the main thing. They're very excited. They're very supportive. You know, they trust us. And, you know, we're out there really to just.

3:06:35be a great influence for young women and it's amazing i'm gonna try to save you guys a little bit and change the topic if that's okay let's talk about auditions because they look super uncomfortable but i'm just i'm just gonna get them uncomfortable on a whole nother level right now now and i hope you guys can answer this just honestly coolest charger player to you individually Like, who's one that, like, just seems like you guys hit it off? Are we going to ask one question that doesn't make you uncomfortable? No, we're not going to. That doesn't make us uncomfortable. Okay. Like, if you guys could each name one, that's, like, your go-to. That's your boy. I really do admire and respect Aaron Sproles. Love him. But he's just an amazing player. And I've been able to see him grow and, you know, to be that underdog who, you know, was told. You know, in college, like, oh, you could, or in high school, you couldn't play at the college level. Yeah. In college, you couldn't play at the pro level, and then look what he's done. Yeah. Have you given him a high five? You know, in my mind. Yeah. Did you know, did you guys know that the Charger girls are not allowed to fraternize with the players? Yeah. They're not allowed. By fraternize, you mean, like, socialize at all, or, like, get romantic? Well, we're, we strictly are on a professional level. Okay. With the players, yeah. And Michelle, who's yours?

3:07:49I would have to agree. I loved watching Sproles last year. I also liked watching Rivers. Yeah. So, I just, I think he's an amazing quarterback. So, the Charger girls are holding auditions. So, any, now, what are the requirements? You have, can pregnant women come? Yeah, Sienna's pregnant. Now, can you, is there like an age thing? Do you have to be over 18? Do you have to be under, you know, 63? Just 18 by the day of the audition. By Sunday, you have to be 18. Is it to be under like 30 or something? No. There's no age limit. No age limit. Now, there's things that you have to bring, like different outfits you have to wear, right? Because there's like a little sports bra that you wear. Like, I know there's different wardrobe changes. Yes, they suggest to wear nylons, either dance shoes or tennis shoes. Check, check, check. Either a one-piece or two-piece leotard. That way everyone's, you know, in uniform. Okay. They should really test, like, what kind of sense of humor the girls have and be like, gotta dress like a clown. Seriously. A pirate. Yeah, a pirate. How creative we are. A pirate. You gotta dress as all kinds of, like, ridiculously goofy stuff. What about, like, tattoos and stuff? Can people with tattoos come? We suggest that you cover them. Okay. Yeah. Cover tattoos, take out piercings. Piercings. Yeah. I'm from Dallas, and I was on the field last year.

3:09:08uh for a monday night football game with my wife and we were i was standing right next to the cheerleaders and my wife of course the whole time is like it's just glaring because i'm talking to them they're so cool like It's such a hard job what they do. Did you guys ever see that reality show they did? Yes. I watch it every year. Is it not the craziest thing you've ever seen? Well, the Charger girls were on it, right? Weren't the Charger girls on that reality show they did? A few years ago, yes. We did have Making the Squad. Were you guys auditioning during that time? We were. That was my first season. So were you on that show? Yeah. Really? Yeah. That's cool. These girls are beautiful. They're very nice. It's a whole different level. It's not, hey, I'm going to go out there and look really pretty and be hot. It's like you work your ass off. I saw the one with the cowboy cheerleaders. But these girls, like you girls have to be able to dance. It's no joke. Right? You really do. I mean, there's so much competition here in San Diego. I mean, it's beautiful, sunny Southern California. So being close to LA too. I got a question for you guys.

3:10:09I play in a men's adult baseball league. And on Sundays, when it's game time. Casey. When it's game time. She's really trying to keep a smart face. She's like, oh, Paul. She goes, this has a point. Okay. You guys are professionals. I'm obviously not a professional. Probably could have been with a little more practice. But, you know, I still, I wake up in the morning and I'm like, it's today's game day. fired up. I got the tunes going. I eat a good breakfast. Are you guys the same? Do you get up and are you stoked? You're going to go out and that's your game. Are you guys just stoked in the morning? I listen to I Have the Tiger. Really? Have you heard our... Oh, you need to. This is what we play for Woods. Make sure they can hear it. I Have the Tiger every morning when you're going. Can you guys hear that? I'm a black-eyed pea girl. Can you hear this? Listen. Woods! Woods! Woods! Woods! Woods! Woods on sports! Woods feels like the coolest guy right now. Wouldn't that get you pumped up? Maybe you listen to that, Casey. Maybe we put Woods on sports. I'll send you guys a disc. And you guys can put that on Sundays before your game. We do get really excited. Woods and I are sharing a mic.

3:11:29And I keep trying to put it in between the two of us. And he keeps yanking it over to be like, hey, so maybe you heard that I'm on an adult men's league. Wait, I have another question. Weird. Okay, now you guys are like vets to the Charger girls. Now, do you have to try out again? Like, is there a certain thing that you guys have to do to be back on the team? We definitely have to try out every single season. So you're trying out on Sunday. You know what, though? Are you nervous? Look at them. They're like Kobe Bryant. This is Kobe and LeBron here. They're like, yeah, we're real worried. We're the ones representing the girls. I think we might make it. You have to ask. scary though because you just is it yeah really michelle's like yeah i'm totally scared you don't want any young 19 year old yeah exactly on your spot no that's that's totally true because there's always competition and you always have to bring your best game to the table because you never know when that

3:12:31you know, next girl has your look or is going to take your spot. So you can't take it for granted. Definitely. You have to go in there and try just as hard as the first year. Girl, you ain't taking my spot. You ain't taking my spot. We need to take a picture of them before we leave and just put it on the website real quick. Absolutely. Our server is going to explode. Yeah, every guy right now is like, what do they look like? You guys know I play guitar too. You know what? You know, dude. Wow. You guys were great. So Sunday, what time again? 9 o'clock. Yeah, 9 a.m. How long does it last about? Hopefully, if you make it through the cuts, it's a long day. I will. I'll make it. You don't worry about that. We'll make it. We have two cuts on the day of, and eventually the day will end typically around 5 or 6, just depending on how many girls show up for the audition. It's a full day, dude. It is a full day. Well, good luck. You guys are going to do great. That's right. You represent our team well. They can fall asleep and still make the team. This is true. They're great. Would it be weird to ask the perfume that they're wearing? It smells nice. Is that weird? It smells nice. What is it? It smells really nice. Chanel? Are you in here? Yes. What month are you? Oh, Chance. That is a good one. Let me see. On the cover of the Charger.

3:13:47Yeah, they're on the cover of the calendar. I think they're going to make it. I think you guys might make it. You guys could do a somersault. You know what? Every girl has to go out and work really hard. We really have to work hard. It is a competition. They're on the cover of the calendar. I think they might make it. We should get them to sign that calendar. We'll auction it off. Yeah, we'll auction it. Grab a sharpie. Little Iron Maiden. And we'll be back. It's the Mikey Show. I think that people are going to like this. The Mikey Show. It's a good time. You know what I mean? Call 570-1949 or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Hey, morning, Dave. Morning, Sal. Looks like they gave me some of your mail by mistake. Uh-huh. Then you must have my missing lottery check. Nah, I'm keeping that. But here's the rest. Oh, wait, look. Another home loan offer. What you think?

3:14:51Indiana or Idaho? Where's it from? Not sure, but when I refinanced my home loan, I went closer to home. Really? Where? San Diego County Credit Union. San Diego County Credit Union handles home loans? Sure. Home loans, equity loans, refinancing, the whole enchilada. And they have a branch about a mile from here. Yeah, they're close, but how about their rates? Really competitive. And San Diego County Credit Union's been around for over 70 years. So they aren't going anywhere, huh? Unlike me. I'm taking my kids to the park. Hey, let me know if my lottery check turns up. A great home loan is closer than you think. Just visit one of our convenient San Diego County Credit Union locations. Call 877-SDCCU for you or visit SDCCU.com. San Diego County Credit Union. Equal housing lender. Federally insured by NCUA. Classics, trick trucks, and muscle cars at the Del Mar Fairgrounds. April 9th, 10th, and 11th. The Good Guys Del Mar Nationals presented by McGuire. The entire fairgrounds will be filled with over...

3:15:522,000 of the world's finest hot rods, customs, classics, muscle cars, and tricked-out trucks. Plus, a giant indoor car show in three buildings. The Secret Guy Street Rod Day Elegance Competition. And be sure to check out the Tire Screech and Street Challenge Autocross Road Course. Plus, commercial and vendor-exempted swap meet, cars for sale, model car show, nostalgia, entertainment, and more. Also, the West Coast Customs Car Showcase presented by Autolock. April 9th, 10th, and 11th. Gates open 8 a.m. daily at the Del Mar Fairgrounds. It's a state fair of automotive excitement you don't want to miss. The Good Guys Del Mar Nationals presented by McGuire. Are you looking for authentic Mexican? Yeah, how did you know? Because I'm Cesar Gonzalez from Amatesta Taqueria, wey. Whoa, man, where is it? At the corner of Richmond and University. Do you have chimichangas? Chimichangas are a gringo invention. What about nachos? Same thing, cuñado gringo food, not authentic Mexican. Wow, what else is masquerading as Mexican food? Well, let's see, cheddar cheese, Spanish olives, sour cream, french fries and burritos, even burritos. No, not burritos. Yes, pelo de maíz, ever heard of Texas? Yeah. That's Tex-Mex food, bro. Remember the album?

3:17:01I'm away. Well, what does Mama Testa's have? Okay, gringo. At Mama Testa, we have nothing but the most authentic Mexican tacos you've ever seen. We start in the Yucatan Peninsula. We don't stop until we get a TJ. Get it? We have everything on the menu. We steam them. We fry them. We grill them. We stew them. Anything you can do to a taco, we make it. We only use free-range meat, so there's no hormones that you cannot get any weirder than you already are. I had no idea I wasn't eating Mexican food. Mama Testa Taqueria. Authentic Mexican food. Richmond and University in Hillcrest. If I can be Bobby Flay, I can surely blow your mind. Come in and let me put some Mexican food. Hey, it's Mikey for AIS. I just want you to know AIS has been in business for more than 40 years, which should mean something to you. What that should tell you is usually when a company's in business for over 40 years, they're doing something right, and they are. Now, the average savings for a person with AIS is $650 a year with their auto insurance. That's a lot of money. Here's something else to consider. I saved $1,600 a year. by switching over to AIS. Now, I've got my parents doing it. I have members of my family doing it. I wouldn't do that unless I actually really felt strongly about this company, and I do. I've been in business with AIS for many years, and the reason is because of people just like you that have called them, and they've actually experienced the savings. You can do that. 1-800-777-4AIS. That number again, 1-800-777-4AIS.

3:18:27Give AIS a call and tell them that Mikey sank. This is an important announcement to the American public who owe more than $10,000 or more in credit card debt. Over the past year, our government has quickly addressed issues threatening our biggest banks and corporations. We now face a similar issue threatening the American public by being burdened with credit card debt. To aid the financial recovery of the American people, we are taking equally swift and serious action. by announcing our 2010 debt recovery plan. If you're a U.S. citizen struggling with $10,000 or more in credit card debt, you now may qualify to have up to half of what you owe to the credit card companies eliminated entirely. For this immediate relief, call 800-724-1344. We understand this is the help our country urgently needs this year on our road to recovery. By lifting the burdens Americans face with credit card debt, we are taking another step to see the change we would all like to see. If you're a U.S. citizen struggling with $10,000 or more in credit card debt, you may now call to see if you qualify to have up to half of what you owe eliminated. 800-724-1344 800-724-1344 Again, that's 800-724-1344

3:19:31The Drew Ford Used Car and Truck Superstore is having a huge sales event all month long. Drew is offering over 80 quality pre-owned Fords, Volkswagens, Hyundais, Nissans, Hondas, and more. All red tag discount price for this special sale. Every used vehicle comes with a Drew Value limited warranty. 12 months or 12,000 miles. See Drew for details. But shop early online at DrewFord.com or at the store where the I-8 and the 125 meet in La Mesa. Now at the Home Depot, get six and a half pound bags of Pennington Smart Seed tall fescue grass seed for the everyday low price of just $12.98. It's called Smart Seed because when you see how healthy your grass looks, how it requires 30% less water, and how much money you save growing such a lush green lawn, you're going to feel pretty darn smart. Thanks to Pennington Smart Seed for just $12.98 every day. More saving, more doing. That's the power of the Home Depot. U.S. only. See store for details. For a great deal on a freshly made-to-order walked meal, check out the Dragon Deals value menu at Pickup Sticks. Six delicious meals, only $4.99 each. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. Uh, I can't do anything. I can't do anything handy at all. Woods. I got one word for you, dude. Get Lauren. I will take like a half an hour to get out of bed and be like, no. Deanna. Ooh, tag-alongs. And Jay. Of course, I have an outrageous story. On FM 94.9. Woods, he's picking the music today. I don't feel.

3:21:28Like, Jamie's crying. Love it. I'm never coming into the studio without makeup on again. As she's literally crying right now, furious at me for being a creep. Which I wasn't at all. Your wife? Yeah. I thought she saw a plane. How could she hear? Because I married Magnum P.I. I told you. Like, she was flying from Dallas to Los Angeles. Heard the whole show. She's heard the whole show. How is that even possible? I don't know, but she's like Magnum P.I. I married Tom Selleck. Jamie, well done. Honey, I didn't do anything. I wasn't being creepy. Lauren was sitting in between them. Yes, it's a bit. She was a filter. It's a bit. You know, I'm not really sure that it could be passed off as a bit when you actually say live on the air, it's a bit. It's a bit. Everything's a bit to one. Yeah. So it's a bit. It's just my bit. Yeah, he's like slow dancing with her. He's like, it's a bit. It's a bit. What, you guys? Did you get a picture of that? That's awesome. Slow dancing. Get all of you, please. So can I? You guys shut up. Please don't post the picture. Yes, please don't post that picture. Of all of us. I mean, really. Just post a picture of the two girls. Stop it already. You don't want to be the girls with no makeup that wake up at three in the morning next to Charger girls that look smoking hot. Really? You both look fantastic. That's right. Oh, yeah. Sure. It's a great picture. The one with my hand on my face. I'm a dead man.

3:22:54You girls look great. I'm a dead man. Can we bring some firemen in for these two, please? So that they may get in trouble, too. Take it off. I know. Listen, is he listening to their reaction? You know it, too. Like, if the microphones are off, they'd be like, so where do you go? What gym do you work at? Hey, you guys. My seatbelt, I'm not sure if it's properly working, but I'm not sure. I'm not sure. Here, let me just get out of your way. Can you come and just check the smoke alarm at my house real quick? It's a little faulty, I think. Santa's pregnant, like, can you come to my house? Can you deliver babies? Yeah, seriously. That's a little weird. That was weird. That got really weird. Right when I said it, I was like, ooh, take that back, take that back. Strange, strange. Creep. Creepy. I'll sit here and then you try to put the seatbelt on for me because I just can't do it. Go ahead. No, you can reach over. The best way to do it is shirtless. It has to go right across my chest, right? You do it shirtless and I'll oil you up for, you know, you want aerodynamic glide. That's funny. Now, Lauren will probably get in trouble for all that and it'll be fine because according to her, she says that she can dance her way.

3:24:06Out of everything. It's true. Now, she says, as in when I get caught red-handed doing something, or I do something that annoys my boyfriend, I dance my way out of it. I thought about it, and I think this might be a family trait that my parents pass down, because my siblings do it, too. I even have different dances for different acts of mischief. I love this. I have my celebratory dances, too. You need to demonstrate. I need to see them. Oh, I know. Like my, quote, Friday dance. It's a good one. Overall, I think the dance your way out bit is a good technique. What are you talking about? I don't even know what she's talking about. And get the video camera. Yeah. Can you show me? Okay, like, here's a good one. Does that record video? Can I record it? Because I have video. You have to record it. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, and wait. I love you, honey, by the way. Are you kidding? Jamie, he actually really wasn't bad. I was the one that was questioning them the entire time. I mean, are you really having to do that right now? Me? He's texting. I'm dead. He's texting her. Lauren's taking off the sweater. She means business. I drank too much coffee. I've got the shakes. Look at her. Look at that. She's half in the bag again. That's what happens to her. She's Irish. What?

3:25:22He's flailing her sled around. I'm an O'Brien. I drink whiskey in my coffee. Okay, I'm ready. Now, can I come up with an instance for where you would need to apologize? Okay, like, say I said that comment about Matt's mom jeans the other day. Yeah, where you told him that his new jeans look like mom jeans? Yeah. Yeah, then I'll just be like this. Wow. It's like a little moonwalk shimmy. And that works? And he just laughs. And he starts laughing and you get out of it? Yeah, I get out of it because he cracks up. Have you ever done that and it doesn't work? Not with him. You're not going to dance your way out of this one. He'll say to me, he'll be cracking up and he'll go, you can't just dance your way out of everything. I go, can I? Dude. I'm blown away. I'm telling you right now. Another brick falls. I don't think that would work if I tried that. I'm going to try it. It works. I can't wait to see Mikey try it. It works so well. You have to admit. You have to admit. Look at him dying over there. Like, he's in trouble. Like, he's starting to take his stuff. You have to admit, when she did that, when she started dancing like that, I thought to myself, that's funny. No, that's really funny. You can't. Like, I realize that.

3:26:39Matt's told me that before. And then my brother, my younger brother, will be like, he'll take the last slice of pizza. I'll be like, dude. And he'll be like, I get it. It's an O'Brien thing. So you all do it. That's funny. I never knew that we all did it. I'm going to try it. I'm going to try it. If I get pulled over by a police officer, I'm going to go, have speed. Well, one person on the show is going to be dancing his ass off today. I guarantee you. When I walk in my apartment. I bet you could do it. And I got the daggers? Yeah. Really? Okay, I want to know, what did you do wrong? Like, was there an instance? Did she give an example? She just thinks I'm creepy. Yeah, but the Charger Girls came in. It started at 6 o'clock in the morning when he said it. He started with it at 6 this morning, he started. Oh, that kind of stuff. Really? I wonder if anybody else does the dance your way out of something, and they actually physically dance. What about the Friday Celebrate dance? Let's see it. What is it? This one's going to be hard to do on the carpet, because I have hardwood floors at home. What is it? But I... Wait, wait, wait. Before you do it. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. She looks like a belly dancer. I don't. Why? Why do people do that? I don't understand. What's the circumstance? What's the circumstance? It's Friday. Hands above her head, right? Turns around. I do. I turn around. So you're looking at the back of her. I do. Hands above the head, shimmying back and forth to the left. It's almost like she's swinging herself on something. Yeah. Yeah. Like monkey bars. Like monkey bars. But jumping sideways from monkey bar to monkey bar. She's also a cuckoo yawner because she's like. Yeah.

3:28:02I like to stretch it out. I mean, it's like in a meeting where all like serious all of a sudden she's like... I think I told you guys that I have... There it is. There it is. Weird. I have a friend of mine and whenever he's in a fight with his girlfriend, he just takes off all of his clothes. Oh, yeah. That's genius. Because it's like, you can't fight when you're naked. Is that mustache guy? No. Oh, okay. Because I bet he would do that. Mustache guy would do that, right? Let me tell you something. I can tell you, the dancing thing, if I do that with my wife... There is a slight chance. And I'm saying there's a slight chance. I'm saying there's a 5% chance that that could work. But that's still 5%. Yeah. If I took my clothes off, I am telling you. It would work 100%. No. I'm telling you 100%. My wife would think that that was so inappropriate. And so childish and so inappropriate. She would think that that is like something a child would do. Hey, hon. Okay, Rebecca would be like, Mike, Mike. No, she would not. Hey, hon. Hey, hon. Yeah, she would cross her arm. Put your clothes on, hon. That would be it. Right now. That would be it. This is not funny, Michael. She would laugh. I guarantee you, my wife would go.

3:29:13That's really inappropriate. If you were mad at her, which probably never happens, but if you were mad at her and she took off her clothes, you'd be done. Yeah, if I was talking to her and she took her clothes off, I'd call a doctor and I'd go, I don't know how to do this. I'm really worried. My wife's a mother and my children, I think she lost her mind. Oh, it's such a good bit. That's a great bit. It's awesome. Well, if I'm doing like the underwear dance, it makes it even funnier. You're standing there doing your Justin Timberlake. Do that. Get out of everything. She cleans her apartment. The Justin Timberlake music in her underwear and dances. Shocking. Does that really surprise anyone? No. That you get out of trouble if you're in your underwear dancing? Yeah. Yeah. So funny. That works. Yeah. I'm the creep on this show. Really? Really? I'm just saying, if I come home and Kim's dancing in her underwear and she's like, wreck the car, it's totaled, I'm just like, what car? I don't care, honey, just dance on. She could do no wrong. She could do no wrong. Guess what? Later today, Kim's going to go, really? Really? Oh, trust me, she knows. Tell me about when Lauren's dancing in her underwear again. I'm going to slit your throat.

3:30:20I was talking about overall. She knows. Kim knows. Yeah, he's talking about his wife. Yes. He has a picture. Does Kim know you have a picture of her up in your studio? Yeah, I got in trouble for that. I told him. I told her. Well, you went in trouble. She hates it when I tell people that she was in any commercial. Kim, you're hot. She's so hot. Talk about an introvert. She's like, I want to be on TV, but I don't want to tell anybody. What? Can we segue this into how we fell in love with our significant others? Because Jay told me his story about Kim yesterday. Oh, I want to hear. I want to know. We kind of talked about this yesterday. How'd you fall in love with it? Well. I was put on a water ski show. That's what I did for a living. And they brought her in from Florida to help with the girls' side of things, help teach everybody because she was a professional water skier in Florida. And I was actually dating a girl on the ski team. And she came walking down in a very small bikini. And I was like, that is the girl for me.

3:31:18And then I met her and talked to her for a little bit. And I was like, even more, I was convinced. I went home, told my mom about her. And my mom was like, oh, you don't fall in love like that. That's lust. That's lust. And I was like, and I immediately was, I was done for. I was all in. So you knew you were in love with her then? He said love at first sight. At first sight. As soon as I saw her, I was like. That is her. Did you close it that night? No. What? It took me three months. I don't know why it still shocks me when he says things like that, but I'm still shocked. I was 100% persistent. She was so out of my league. I was just like, there's no way. But she says right off the bat that she was attracted to me, but I think she's a liar because I had to work. Wait, Jay, Jay, Jay, you had another girlfriend. What'd you do with that one? Oh, it was brutal. I bet. There's this thing you have to do. She was my adagio partner, basically, which means you put your head, you know, you flip the girl around on your hands above your head when you're on skis. You did that? You did that? Yeah. So there's a girl that, there's a rope that hooks you. Wait, no, no, no, no. Stop, stop, stop. What? Wait. Wait.

3:32:21She was my Da Jo partner. Jay, come in here. I need to have you in front of me. It's like tandem water skiing. He could tell me that he was Hercules, and it wouldn't surprise me. He could go, yeah, I didn't tell you I was Bigfoot? I was Bigfoot. Oh, my. While you were skiing, you could hold her up and flip her? Yeah, we would build pyramids. I would go off jumps. We'd do all this stuff. I'd barefoot. She barefoot is unbelievable. I'd barefoot. Yeah. She's amazing. She can barefoot backwards. No skis. Wait. Your girlfriend was the girl that you would hold above your head while you were skiing and be like. Exactly. Well, the other girl was the girl. Cop of feel. That was my girl. But then they brought Kim in and she was, you know, she was a superstar. Professional. From Cypress Gardens, which is a big place in Florida. So they put the two of us together and basically they hook a rope to your chest. And they have a thing in the boat called a quick release where if you fall, you don't be drugged behind the boat for 30, 40 yards before the releases. So the girl I was dating was on charge of the quick release in the boat. So I'm flipping Kim around up above me and we kind of blow it. She kind of falls down, slides down, and I'm holding her like this right next to me. Right. And I'm like looking in her eyes. Yeah. And I'm just like, and all of a sudden I fall. Quick release. And the boat did not quick release. My girlfriend that was in the boat was just like.

3:33:41Really? Wow. It drug me for, you know, 50 yards before I finally came up out of the water. I was drowning. Now, of course, camera just falling off. But my girlfriend was like, click, let me go. And I was like, crazy. So, yeah, she tried to kill me. Whatever. I would have done that, too. Weird. I'd be like, you're my boyfriend. You better stop. Yeah. If Pepper were in charge of that quick release, you'd still be up. I'd still be dragging. Yes, dragging. She'd still be dragging. You had enough yet? Yeah. You had enough? You done? You want a quick release? Why don't you look into some more googly eyes? Yeah. See, like, that's so cool. Love at first sight. Yeah. What if that was your story? That's so cool that he's able to flip a broad around when he's skiing. Yeah. He's just cool. He's like the coolest. I don't bite. I don't love first sight. Yes, you do. I'm in with his mom. I believe that when you first see him, you're just, yeah, you're just hot for him. And then you got to meet him and you got to talk to him before you fall. It's fun that he talked to her. He talked to her. And I'd actually talked to her on the phone one time before because I was friends with her friend that came out before. And I talked to her on the phone one time. They said, hey, talk to this. This is your future boyfriend kind of thing. I was like, yeah, I'm sure she didn't look that good. And I talked to her on the phone for a little bit. And it was an awkward conversation. But I could kind of feel something even then. It was weird. What about you, Pepper? With Matt? Moment you fell in love with him. Moment. Well. Oh, wait. You told us. It was when he sent you.

3:35:02No, I didn't tell you. To the package of his hair. No, that was just a sweet thing that he did. I had a two-parter. Okay, so the first time was we were at like a cool guy party, like a C and B scene kind of thing. And everyone was like, you know, dressed, checking each other out, like not really having conversation, just looking over the person's head that they're talking to to see if there's anyone cooler than that person. Sounds fun. And he's like, he's wearing cargo shorts. Weird. And a Mickey Mouse t-shirt. Of course he was. And he's just bopping around, happiest guy you could ever see. And I was like, that's the guy I want to talk to. Really? Because he just looked like he didn't take himself too seriously. So we talked like all night. A couple months went by because I was like, you know, I'm single. I don't want, you know, whatever. And he courted me. And I was, at the time, I was working like what you would call a suit and tie. job but my friends opened up a new wine bar and they were like well Valentine's Day you know we need some people to to work as servers would you mind like single ladies they asked like three of our friends would you guys mind working on Valentine's Day I'm like yeah I don't have anything else to do and that was like back in early January and then Matt and I sort of like started dating but I was being real like

3:36:14Weird. Weird. I was being real. Standoffish. Cautious. Weird. But I was about to leave on March 1st to leave the country for six months and travel. So I was like, I don't want to get too heavily involved with anybody. Like, forget it, you know. So he shows up at the place I'm working on Valentine's Day with a single rose. And I was like waiting on a table. I got all flustered. I'm like, oh, my gosh, my gosh. And then we went back. And we had only been dating a few weeks. We went back to. My house? And he had like... No. He had gotten in touch with my roommate. No. No. Got on the Mickey Mouse t-shirt. No, he wasn't wearing the Mickey Mouse t-shirt. Maybe his wolf t-shirt. He was wearing Donald Duck t-shirt. His wolf. My mom gave him a goofy... Oh, no, a Tigger t-shirt. The wolf. But he had gotten like a million balloons or whatever into my house. Like red and pink and white. And you didn't throw them out immediately? No. How bad is that for the environment? No. You should have booted it. They were contained. Were they mylar? He got me a stuffed baby seal and an elephant tusk. Yeah, it was really cute. And he nailed it to the door. I was like, oh, wow, that's so cute, babe. You got me a baby seal and an elephant tusk. That's so nice of you. Anybody else you would have vilified? Yeah. That Matt is able to put balloons in there and he's the sweetest guy in the world. Yep.

3:37:40Great, Mylar. That's his new name. Thanks for ruining my moment. You're welcome. Never mind. You're 100%. She was reminiscing. You're 100% welcome. It's really sweet of him. Isn't it sad how they stopped doing stuff like that? Yeah, it stopped. Does Matt still do stuff like that? No. Not to that extent. I left Rebecca posted this morning. I left my wife a note this morning. What did it say? Yeah? I did. On Facebook? I want to know. No. What? At my house. Oh. Because she's going to be at my house before I get there. The keys under the mat, babe. No. It said, I love you. And you know what I said? I said, I'm glad you're here. I love you. And I'm glad you're home. And I underlied home. And then did you spit dip all over the nose? Get. That's cute. Yeah. I said, I'm glad you're home. And I underlied home. Because this is home. Because she's moving here. And this is probably the only part of the show she didn't listen to today. Yeah. I'm crying on the inside. I'll guarantee you. What did your post-it say, Mike? Where's my lunch? Where's my lunch? No, it was probably really cute. She just accomplished something that she wouldn't want me to talk about on the radio. But she just accomplished something that is really, I'm proud of her about. And I told her, you know, you did a great job and I'm proud of you and congrats. I can't remember how I phrased it. Babe. I wrote it with a sharpie on a little sticky. Where'd you stick it? On her mirror. Oh, in the bathroom? Yeah. And then did you leave her another note to tell her to clean the spots up? Yes.

3:39:01I'm like, I pointed at the spot. I put a little Sharpie with an arrow pointing to the spot. And I'm like, BTW. By the way, don't forget to clean this glue up the mirror. Please. Or I'll die. This morning, let me tell you how patient she is. This morning, I wake up and I'm running around the house like a madman because my phone's not plugged into the charger. And I finally got to wake her up. What? I finally got to, babe. Yeah. I can't find my phone. She goes. You fell asleep with it in your hand. It's in the bed. Wow. Did she burp you afterwards? Yeah, yeah. Then she swaddled me and put me back to sleep. See, I think... She couldn't understand me with a pacifier sticking out of my mouth. You binky. I'm telling you guys, if you guys can just keep up those, just the stupidest thing, like a post-it, I mean, that means so much. I'm sitting here like, man, why does a tattoo have more? Make that ride, Todd. You got to do that. You got to do that. It's sad. But what are the women? He's at work right now. It's pointless. But what we talked about, what are women supposed to do? Respect. We do everything. Which means silence.

3:40:09Don't speak. And just let me watch my game. That's not it? No. Oh, it's not? It's not silence. It's not? Where's Jay when you need him? So am I not respecting? Am I not respecting by saying, Todd, why don't you do that? Yes. Yes. That's it. That's it. That's exactly right. So he's like, honey, you're learning. I'm not doing it now because you just said that. That's the cycle. Mikey and I talk about it. It's in the book. I'm learning. Mikey was explaining it to me. And he gave the example of you're sitting at dinner with your wife. And somebody says, Bill never cleans out the garage. And she's like, doesn't clean out the garage. He doesn't do anything. And you as a man go, and then he in turn is like, really? You think you're some treat? Then he's not loving her. And it is this vicious cycle. So the smart thing for me to do would have been to just bend quiet after I said, that means a lot that you guys did that with a post-it. End. Well, what do you mean? No, no, no, no. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yes, yes. If he had heard that, then that would mean more to him that I said that then rather than Todd doesn't do that. Exactly. Yeah. All right. Sorry. Like the example I use is like if a guy goes. So, yeah, you know, the other day I was doing some woodworking at the house.

3:41:23And maybe your guy's sitting next to you and he goes, oh, yeah, I like to do that sometimes. And she's like, no, you don't. No, you don't. Yeah, I never do that. And it's just like, I mean, it's totally emasculating. And you're like, it's worse. Thanks a lot, Team Woods. You know what I mean? It's awful. Yeah. See, Matt talks himself down. So I always have to be like, have you guys heard? You know? He'll be like, ah, it's not a big deal. And I'm like, no, no, no, no, it is. That's good. That's good. Guys love that. And. Women really like it when in front of people, you compliment them on something that they do. Women like that too. People like that. Yeah, yeah. No, women. That's what he's saying. Women love that. If you compliment your lady on something that she does in front of other people, it means a lot to her. For example, say we had people come over to our house and I was like... Did you guys see this fence that Todd just built? Look how great that looks. Something like that. Totally makes you feel good about yourself. That's a brand new fence. Yeah, but more often than anything is what I say is that the respect thing for dudes is always spelled out the best by what it doesn't look like. And it doesn't look like the girl going, no you don't. Yeah.

3:42:34It's a killer. I told my parents about it because they both do it to each other. And, like, they're both reading that book right now. And, like, you know, I mean, hey, nobody's perfect. I'm far from it. But I've got a lot from that book, dude. A lot. The book's really good. It's called Love and Respect. And when I file papers, that's what I've been reading. I'm like halfway through. Yeah, the deal is that a rock-solid relationship is built on the concept that a woman desires love, a man desires respect. And for a woman, it is little notes. It is kind words. It is, and this is the one that I struggle with the most, time. Kind. That's what they want, dude. That's the one that I struggle with the most. They want your time. I can do the little gifts. I can do the little acts of kindness. And, like, that one is the thing that Matt does for Lauren. Like, when he'll do the coffee for her. He'll buy her kombucha. That's an act of kindness. Buying her the kombucha. Making the bed. Those things equate to a woman as little acts of love.

3:43:39But the one that I have the hardest time with is the time. I think a lot of guys do. Bro, I wrote Mikey an email. And you guys know Jamie has been the last three weeks basically gutting our house that we lived in. Her mother was a hoarder. It's taken her forever. She's broken down crying several times. Had a garage sale. It's killing her. Like it's killing her. And we were going to go to church and dinner with Mike and Rebecca. And I wrote Mike. I was like. Dude, I got to have a night with her. Like, I got to take her to dinner and just be with her, the two of us. Earthquake. Oh, is this an earthquake? Shut up. Yeah, earthquake. Did you feel that? It's still going on. Oh, yeah. Shut up. I don't feel anything. Oh, I feel weird. I'm starting to get vertigo. What's the deal? Why is it still happening? Because they last a while. What is going on? Hang on. Hey, be quiet. Hang on. Yeah, it's swaying. It's over. Is it over? It's still swaying. Can't you feel the counter? Oh. I'm going to vomit. What? I've never... Oh. Oh, I feel nauseous. I'm weirded out. I'm weirded out. I missed it. I need to go home. Yep, you missed it. I feel like vertigo. Yeah, it's weird. Did you feel it, Woodsy? No. I can be talked into it, though. I was like, I mean, it was, I felt it for one second. Yeah. Swing. I just feel it. It was just swing. Are you sure it's just not, it wasn't like a bunch of people running down the hallway? I'm a hundred percent. Yeah, it was like, whoa. No, because when he does the Incorporator and jumps outside, the whole studio shit. Oh, this wasn't that. Thanks, L-O-B. The whole studio. No, no, no. When that.

3:45:07fat pigs in the hallway jumping up and down? No, I'm just saying. The reason that it wasn't that is because it was a sway. It was a sway back and forth. And it was that kind of sway that was like on rollers. Woods makes the room move. Well, I'm going to check in the news. I'm going to check in the news. I'll make it move. Oh, yeah, Woods. It's my favorite rat song. I put it on there for you. I love it. That's great. Wanted, man. Be back after this. You're listening to The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. In this episode of Mossy Nissan's Dare to Compare, the reliable Nissan Altima takes on challenger Toyota Camry in a race to the finish. The catch, they each get just one gallon of gas. And here comes the stylish Nissan Altima 2.5 S cruising in for the win. Hey, congratulations, Team Altima. Oh, yeah, thanks, man. It was easy. Our Altima gets better city MPG than that Camry. Yeah, and this car is...

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3:52:12FM 94.9. Sammy Hagar. Your love is driving me crazy. This puts me in a good mood, dude. I love it. This is going to be a good little playlist. We'll add this to the Mikey Show Facebook fan page. Proudly. So if you go to Facebook.com, all you got to do is type in the Mikey Show and you can join our fan page and we'd love to see you come and hang with us. On Friday, we're going to be doing our very first meet and greet. And it's going to take place at Stonebrew. Happened from 5 to 7. And it's going to be really, really cool. So we'd love to see you out there. Did anything come up on the earthquake or no? No, not yet. We felt it here in Mission Valley. Yeah, we did. Came up in North County, said our chandelier, my wife said the chandelier was just swinging crazy. Let me refresh. Hold on. 570-1.

3:53:3194.9 is our number. And this never happens, does it? It hasn't happened in a while. So I've moved here, and there's flies running around, and there's coyotes eating dogs and hawks and owls, and now there's earthquakes. Yeah, but San Diego just has crazy, sometimes we have mudslides and wildfires. We have stuff. Price to pay for paradise. Here we go, I got it. It was 10 minutes ago. It was 5.5 in Baja, California. Man. They're just getting hammered down there in Baja, dude. And then I guess one hour ago it says, and maybe this is wrong, but it says even one hour ago there was like a 4.5. Huh. I'm surprised that we felt it because it's much bigger than the one that happened on Saturday. Well, we're on the seventh floor, so maybe, you know. Let's see. Did you hear about the kid in Colorado that... I guess they fired a judge because the judge put a warrant out for this kid's arrest. He's 19 years old. What did he put a warrant out for? Because the 19-year-old boy had an overdue library DVD. Really? Uh-huh. Warrant. Yep. They picked him up, actually, this 19-year-old for speeding, and then they held him for nearly eight hours after they discovered the warrant.

3:54:51From this judge who'd been a judge for 30 years. And, yeah, the kid said, look, I returned the DVD. I put it in a mailbox. And it was, you know, they should have it by now. So they called the library. And, yeah, the DVD was back. So the judge was fired on Tuesday. Me. Oh, that scared me to death, dude. I was trying to get your attention a little bit. Why? Were you trying to kill your boy? Oh, my goodness. Good Lord. So. Do you think that the mom was mad that they arrested her kid for returning a DVD that had already been returned? Obviously, mothers are protective. I wonder what it would have sounded like if she'd called 911 about it. Yeah, hi, sir. I'm calling because my 19-year-old son is being arrested or trying to be arrested for a DVD that they say he has, but he actually returned the DVD. He stole a DVD. No, no. He took a DVD out from the library of his school. He returned the DVD, and now they're trying to arrest him saying that he hasn't returned the DVD. Well, so he stole it, he stole it, and then returned it before they knew it was stolen? No, no. Sir, he never stole the DVD. He rented it legit. Okay. Legit. Legit. What DVD was it? It's Return of the Jedi, but I don't think that's... Return of the Jedi?

3:56:15Yeah. He probably has every right to be arrested there. Is your son there? That's inappropriate. Is it? Yeah, just a second. Hang on. Hello? Yeah, so this is 911 operator. You allegedly stole a DVD, is that right? No, sir. I checked it out of the library, but then I returned it. And it was Return of the Jedi? Yes, sir. Do you think you're a Jedi? Do I what? Do you think you're a Jedi? Because you know you're not a Jedi. No, I don't, though. You don't think you are? No. Kind of? No, I just rented it to watch it. Return of the Jedi, really? Yeah. But I took it back, and they're trying to arrest me for not taking it back. You should be arrested, pal, for renting Return of the Jedi. You're 19 years old. That's a little harsh. Is this 911? Yeah, this is 911, but I'm trying to give you some friendly advice. Maybe go try to see a girl naked. Maybe try that.

3:57:14Can I speak to 911, please? This is 911. Yeah, but you just said stuff that's weird. Hey, what's the name of your imaginary friend? I don't have an imaginary friend. Do you live in an imaginary jungle and play with Ewoks? No. Do you have a lightsaber? No, I rented the movie because I wanted to watch it. Yeah, I know. Maybe try going out, meeting some girls. What? Come on, Pete. Grow up. Grow up, Pete. Mom. Pete. Can you just... He's saying that I have an imaginary friend? What's your imaginary friend's name? Shiloh? No. What is it? Do you think you're a Sith Lord? Are you a Jedi? What's Yoda up to? I don't think that. Can you come to my mom? Mom, can I talk to 911? I'm on the phone, you will. Is that better for you? Hello? Yeah, 911. How can I help you? What are you saying to my son, sir?

3:58:14Not that I just told him that I'm very sorry and that I'll send a unit out. Okay, he doesn't have an imaginary friend. Sure he doesn't. Okay, you guys have a good day. You don't do the same. Okay, bye. That's fantastic. 570-1949 is our number. Hell, how are you? How are you doing? Did you guys get the earthquake info or? We just did. We did. Did you feel it? I was walking through the halls. Yes. Well, actually, I was listening to you guys and I was about to pull into the parking garage and I put the brakes on because I was like, I don't want to pull in this huge concrete structure if it's going to be a big one. So fortunately, there was no one behind me. But I waited until you guys were like, OK, I think it's done. Yeah. OK. Did you hear the hair metal today? I loved. The hair metal. Love it. It was great. I heard the Metallica when I was taking my shower. It was great. Don't encourage him, Hillary. No, it was so good. He's so excited. I was so excited. It was awesome. Let's see. So, Hillary, what do you have coming up today? I picked all kinds of good stuff. Thank you for it. Oh, hey, Jay. Sorry, Jay. Go ahead. Go ahead.

3:59:25You picked, like, what? Arcade Fire, Rogue Wave, Flat Crows, Edward Sharp, and the Magnetic Zeros, Johnny Cash Primus. I just grabbed, like, everything that looked good. Dirty Heads featuring Rome, so it'll be good. Sweet. Yeah. Sounds rad. Tomorrow's Friday, right? Tomorrow is Friday. Let me see a Friday dance, Pep. Friday dance? Make it right. She's standing up. She's about to do it. There it is. Shimmying. Shimmying her life. Lovely and talented Hillary is up next. The Mikey Show will be back tomorrow morning at 6 and do it all over again. Mikey Show's out late. The music all day. FM 94.9. The music.