The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 04/12/10
Monday, April 12, 2010
Monday April 12, 2010
First thing Woods tells Mikey is that smells great, which leads to a discussion about lotion. Facebook has changed dating forever, Sienna explains. The Kid tells about quitting a job and shouting down his boss. Mikey explains hand shaking PSI. Woods on Sports touches on all the weekend action, including the sport of “cocky”. Dude Yer Dumb goes after “get in the hole” guy and Jim Carey. Mikey prefers generic over brand names and Woodsy needs help going to the doctor so Jay comes to his aide. Sienna reports on Pharmacist dos and don’ts then gives a lesson on how to get a drink at a busy bar. For the first time, Mikey plays in the Name That tune game featuring movie quotes but can’t compete with Woods. The girls don’t like the movies Jay picked. The worst ways to break up with someone is next. Dave Matthews stops by in his hemp suit and wonders if Mikey is related to Fernando Valenzuela. Next up is Cheeseburger-flavored Doritos taste test that Pepper want no part of. Mikey just can’t win at Settle a Bet with LOB. Woodsy recaps his baseball win over the weekend and his meltdown with the umpire. Callers support Woods and his “play to win” mantra. Frankie is upset when Woods offers to take Mikey to a Padres game. Sienna tells us about a 19 year old girl who cracks open a beer while riding in a cop car. Audio of the 911 call about an old cat that attacks postal workers is played next. Woods needs a battle plan for protecting his dogs against coyotes. Michael Shannon closes out the show.
Bumper Music
| 1. Pinball Wizard by The Who |  |
| 2. Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd | |
| 3. Last Name by Carrie Underwood | |
| 4. She Sells Sanctuary by The Cult | |
| 5. Livin’ In The U.S.A. by Steve Miller Band | |
| 6. Your Love by (Acoustic) The Outfield | |
| 7. One Time by Justin Bieber | |
| 8. Separate Ways (Worlds Apart) by Journey | |
| 9. Half of my Heart ft. Taylor Swift By John Mayer | |
| 10. Georgia On My Mind by Ray Charles | |
| 11.Not Meant To Be by Theory Of A Deadman | |
| 12. Cats In The Cradle by Ugly Kid Joe | |
| 13. Face Drop by Sean Kingston | |
| 14. Gimme Shelter by The Rolling Stones | |
| 15. Hero Of The Day by Metallica | |
| 16. Baba O’Riley by The Who | |
Facebook and datingLotion and cologne usageSports legal news (Roethlisberger, Holmes trade)Public annoyance behaviors (Dude You’re Dumb)Jim Carrey Twitter criticism of Elin WoodsEngland cat 911 callMovie quote game (Name That Toon)Hosts’ proposal storiesBaseball bat‑throwing incidentDouble Down sandwich discussionIrish Cyclone family bitCensus and bankruptcy hotline ads
The show featured a mix of light‑hearted banter and topical discussion, with the hosts talking about lotion and cologne habits, how Facebook has changed dating, and recent sports news including Ben Roethlisberger’s legal outcome and Santonio Holmes’ trade. They also ran recurring bits such as "Dude You’re Dumb," a Jim Carrey Twitter rant about Tiger Woods’ wife, a comedic 911 call about an aggressive cat in England, and the game "Name That Toon." Personal stories rounded out the episode, including the hosts’ proposal anecdotes and Woods’ on‑field baseball meltdown where he threw his bat after a disputed call.
What happened, in order
Lotion and Cologne Talk
Mikey, Woods, Pepper and Sienna debate the weirdness of using lotion before cologne, describing a "fragrance cocktail" and whether free lotion samples are overkill.
Facebook Dating Changes
The crew discusses how Facebook has made relationships and breakups public, the habit of checking exes' pages, and the awkwardness of finding out about engagements or breakups through status updates.
Sports Legal News
Woods reports that Ben Roethlisberger will not be indicted for sexual assault due to "too many uncertainties," and that Santonio Holmes has been traded to the New York Jets and may face a four‑game suspension.
Dude You're Dumb Bits
Examples of irritating public behavior are shared: a construction worker who purposefully belches loudly, guys who scream "get in the hole!" after every golf shot, and persistent cat‑calling whistles.
Jim Carrey Twitter Rant
Jim Carrey’s series of tweets criticizing Tiger Woods’ wife Elin are read aloud, sparking a debate about whether the comments were justified or unnecessary.
England Cat 911 Call
A humorous role‑play of a 911 call from England is performed, where a woman complains that her 19‑year‑old cat Lester is attacking postal workers and refuses to let them deliver mail.
Name That Toon Game
The panel plays a movie‑quote guessing game for a pair of Anarchy sunglasses, correctly identifying quotes from films like "The Godfather," "E.T.," and "Young Frankenstein."
Proposal Stories
Mikey, Woods and Jay each recount how they proposed (or didn’t) to their partners, ranging from Mikey’s knee‑down proposal to Woods’ drunken, ring‑less engagement and Jay’s mutual decision to marry without a formal propo
People mentioned
MikeyWoods (Steve Woods)Pepper O'BrienSiennaJayLaurenRebeccaToddJim CarreyTiger WoodsElin WoodsBen RoethlisbergerSantonio HolmesDave Matthews
42,093 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
BZT San Diego. A Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of The Mikey Show. FM 94.9. And be careful because everybody's driving like lunatics. It's raining. That's what happens when it rains. We forget everything. Forget what we've been taught by our really odd sophomore year teacher that taught. We called our guy Lurch. What? He almost called in sick today. It was raining. Yeah, I didn't know how to get here. Right? Lose your mind. Yeah. So mean, man. Our driver's ed guy called him Lurch and kids would see him and they would go, you rain. I know, right? That's great. Come on. My poor dude. Got enough issues with being six feet ten. You know, now you got to do the you rain with him. That's a good bit. Did he play ball? Yeah, he did.
He played ball in college. That's the payoff. Yeah. That's the trade. Well, then he ended up teaching driver's ed. Yeah, and couldn't teach me for the life of him how to do the parallel thing. Well, you couldn't see over the steering wheel. That was part of the problem. So welcome to the program. It's all rainy. I hate it, dude. It's dangerous out there. It is. I almost spun out. It's a good day to cuddle up in bed. Wouldn't it be great if we could do this show in front of a fireplace? On a bare skin rug? I don't think I'd be very funny though. I think I'd be like sleepy. With an old dude in a rocking chair. Not a wheelchair. Nice save. A rocking chair and a harmonica. He's like while you sit there. You know what I mean? Well done. Thank you.
You can't see too well. Is that Bob Dylan? That's right. Great way to start it. All right. Testimony goodbye. We'll see you again. See you later. See you next time. 570-1949 is our number. And you can call us right now about whatever you want and talk about anything. Obviously, a lot of big stuff happened over the weekend with the Masters and all that stuff. You could also text your comments to us, 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. Woods told me I smell good today. You do. That's awkward. New cologne? No. Old cologne? I think it's funny that Woods is the one to tell him. Yeah, I know. It smells good. The ladies never say it to me. Yeah, we would. But Woods, he goes, you smell great today, pal. What is that? Yeah, you never told me. It's because there's a variety of things on me. Oh, okay. So I don't know which to tell you. I'd have to tell you all three. You'd have to identify. Fire away. Which it is.
I don't like that, I don't think. You don't? It may be overwhelming. I mean, if you smell good, then maybe you got lucky. That smells good. But if you have three different smells, it's like... Sometimes you got to do a fragrance cocktail. Yeah? It's true. A suicide. You do a suicide, yeah. Now, can I smell you? I'm coming around. Three pumps of each. Yeah, but there's different stuff going on, Sienna. So you got to smell the arm first. Just like your right ear? Yeah, that arm. That smells like ink. Is that just... Is that lotion? Yeah. Because my skin gets dry. Okay, now what else? Anything else? Yeah. I got to reach that. Yeah, yeah, this right here. That does smell good. Things are getting weird in here. Why? Weirder and weirder. We're not making out. I was seeing I was giving them a lap dance or something. Yeah, it wasn't that. You're just smelling it. Okay, wait. They're very similar smells, though. They are? I think. I like... Colognes that smell like soap. Oh, boy. Did you do the bit where you bought some cologne and they gave you some lotion with it and you're using the lotion and the cologne? Nah. Which is like the worst thing ever. What's wrong with that? Yeah, there's nothing wrong with that. It's overkill. You don't like freebies? That's not good lotion, dude. You know that. It is good lotion. It isn't, though. I didn't do that. It's not. It's heavily perfumed, which you don't want. Put the lotion on of your choice. Right. And while it's still drying, then spray your cologne on it. Yeah, because it's going to stick with you. Yeah, yeah.
Really? You're talking to the master here. So I don't need your tips because I got them down. It's weird. The lotion talk, though, is freaking weird. Yeah, the lotion talk is weird. Yeah, you rub it on your skin, you know? I'm just amazed that you put lotion on this morning. My arms feel hot until I put lotion on them. They feel hot. Me too. Like a sunburn. Mine feel hotter once I put lotion on because it, like, blocks my pores. It's because you're not putting something soothing with aloe. I brought new lotions. Vitamin P12. I think you just turned on your phone. So, real quickly, let me introduce. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. Woodsy is our sports guy sitting right across from me. He's 34. Pepper O'Brien, 29 years old. She's the blondie in the sweater right to my right. This gorgeous girl to my left is Sienna. She's our news girl. She's 25. And Jay is our producer. He's separated by glass in the other room. He produces and answers phones for us. Carell. Can we talk about this? Oh, yeah. You guys are both. Oops, wrong one. That kind of works. That's what I meant. They're both wearing their Matus t-shirt. Woods and I match. Woods and Sienna wore the same t-shirt today. Matus is a... It's a surf brand. Surf brand. It's a very green conscience.
Conscious. Perfect for me. My sister, who's in high school, saw this in my room yesterday. She was over and she was like, geez, Sienna, those are like the coolest. That's like the coolest brand right now. Like everyone in my high school wears it. Of course. And I was like, I'm wearing it tomorrow. Yeah, they're made in La Jolla, I guess. Well, that's totally why. Well, the reason I wore it is because it's so. Comfortable. It feels like I have a naked woman on me. It feels amazing. That's not why I wore mine. It feels amazing. You wore yours too already? Yesterday. I wore it to bed and to the gym. Did you wear it because it felt like you were wearing Keira Knightley? No. I wore it because it felt like flower petals on my skin. They're comfy. You guys, I actually have a coat made of flower petals that I actually wear. For sure. Do you have to replenish it when the flower petals die? Who doesn't? Well, you guys get the kind that don't. Right, Sienna? Yes. You guys don't get flowers that die. That's dumb. Just get the real ones that last forever. That last forever. Mom! Mom, I want flowers from the founding youth. Come on, Mom. Come on, Mom. Just make it happen. M1HB. Hello, everyone. Hi. How are you?
Good. I just wanted to say thank you for having us all out at Stone. We had a blast. It was good to see all the old M1s that I know and get to meet a bunch of new ones that I know from M1 sites. I know it. M1 Herald was out there, and I think he said it best. He says it was like a family reunion, and it really was. I mean, how great was that meet and greet? So rad. Incredible. Amazing. It's like a family picnic. It was so cool, too, the location. Like, really, really made it amazing because we were outside. It was like a garden setting. It felt like a wedding reception. It did. That's what it felt like. And there's pictures right now at MikeyShow.com. Go to MikeyShow.com, and you can see a whole gallery of pictures from the meet and greet. Such a good time. Yeah. There's a bunch on M1Site, too. Nice. Yeah, M1Site.com. M1 Danny was out there, and he is a... Just amazing photographer, man. I almost said terrific photographer. And I'm like, dude, you're not that old. Don't say terrific. It's wonderful. Wonderful. Delightful, actually. Thank you, HB. You're welcome. Thanks, guys. Thank you. I was just amazed. Like, I kept thinking, wow, that's the coolest person I've ever met. And then another person would come up and I'd be like, oh, that's the coolest person. Like, it was just one really, really nice.
awesome person after another. I know that sounds really cliche, but everyone was really outgoing. Yeah. You know, I, they were carrying the conversation in my opinion. I was like, Hey, great listeners. Totally. You know, the best part for me was I talked to a lot of these people on Facebook and stuff. And then when you walk up, you're like, I know you dude. Yeah. I creeped a couple of people out. Yeah. I was like, Like, one listener would come up, and they would say their first name. I don't want to say anyone's, like, first and last names without their permission on the air. Say their first name. Okay, so, like, Wade came up. Tess came up. And I would be like, oh, you're Tess? Yeah. So-and-so. And, like, their faces would automatically be like, yeah. Yeah. Or, like, some people, I just know their face, and I'd be like, oh, yeah, you're first and last name. Right. Yeah, because I'm kind of weird. And I did that to Daniel Cole, M1DC. And I walked up, I'm like. Dude, finally. Yeah. Finally. You've been talking for three weeks or six weeks now. And Jesse, too. Yep. Jesse, yep. The way that I did it, the way I did it was I would walk up behind them. Yeah. And I would go, are you Brian? Hi, Brian. Did you just get here? You're about a 46. Yeah, you're about a 46. Could you give me a ride home?
You know, because of the weather, I had to walk here. It's beautiful sunshine. Oh, yeah. Well, I broke my couch. Break your couch. Break your couch. That's strange. M1 Redbeard's on the line. What's up, Redbeard? Turn that radio down, bro. What up? So I was watching Jimmy Kimmel Live the other day. They showed this clip from YouTube. Basically, it's the Filipino version of America's Got Talent. Really? and there's this dude on there that was done up like a drag queen, and he starts singing, and it's really awful. And then out of nowhere, he makes the exact noise of a horse. And it catches you off guard, and then he does it again, and you're like, what the heck just happened? And just, like, the makeup and the facial expression and the noise, it was seriously the funniest thing ever. Now, was it the... Or was it the...
No, it was like the full-on, like, neighing. Like the neighing? Yeah. Exactly. Thank you for the call. I can't understand why his, because he does have his radio down. Probably the cell phone. It's a cell phone. My cell echoes a lot. When it rains, weird things happen. It's so distracting when you're, if you ever, if your phone echoes and you're trying to talk to someone, you can hear yourself. You're like, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, still hearing myself. My voice is weird. I just do the hang up and call right back. Can I call you back? It's so distracting. It is. How has Facebook, Sienna, changed dating? Because this is a story today. Yes, they listed five different ways. And I think they're pretty accurate. Facebook makes you overanalyze everything. Meaning, like, you're checking their posts. You're checking their wall. What's going on? Have they said anything? What's their most recent status update? Did they say anything about me? What are their girlfriends saying? They haven't said anything in a status update since we had that argument at our date. Is he mad? Like, I don't know. Who's that girl posting on his wall? And how strange is it when you think that five years ago we really didn't? I know. Three years ago. Three?
See, I wanted to say three, and then I didn't want somebody to go, really? You? You're so behind. So I decided on five, which makes no sense. Yeah. That's made me even more uncool. I should have said, you know what? 20 years ago. Yeah, three weeks ago, guys. No one would have done that. The founder of Facebook was like two, five years ago. Yeah, seriously. This is why Todd can't have a Facebook page. Probably better. Why, number two? All of them. Oh, all of them. All of them. It's unnecessary. And he's married, so it shouldn't matter. I know. No, we'll make him one today. No. Woods and I will make him. It'll be fine. It'll be fine. TTG. Yeah. Taking care of. No, Todd the God. Okay, got it. Got it. Always mistake these two. He was so mad at me. I called that. I said it to him the other night. He wasn't mad at you. He was probably stoked. He was laughing. I knew you were going to get me. I know. People were coming up to him at the meet and greet. Hey, you Todd the God? It was amazing. It took off like Pepper did. I know. What's that? It took off like Pepper did. That's right. Whatever. It did. Another way Facebook has changed dating. You see all the action your ex is getting. Oh.
How do you see that? You go to their page and you snoop around and you're like, who's that chick in the picture with you? You just made that your profile pic? What is that? If you're friends, if Sienna and I were dating and we were friends on Facebook and then I started dating Lauren and Lauren and I were writing messages, it would say, Steve Woods wrote on Lauren O'Brien's wall, Steve Woods. And then Sienna would be like. Oh, really? And then she can just, bam, click and see. And they busted. Crazy. You got to get rid of the exes. Yeah. I mean, you can delete them. Just do it. Yeah, I agree. But then it's like. Okay, when you delete the person, they're like, oh, they must not be over me. They couldn't even deal with it. But which is worse, them thinking that or your current thinking something? Yeah. But what if there is no current? Well, why would you get rid of them if there's no current? What if you just saw loosey-goosey out there, but it kills you? Like, what if you didn't want the breaking up to happen? Yeah, but I would totally check their page. And if you delete them as a friend and you don't have access, you can't even look at anything on Facebook. You know what I mean? Right. So I would rather just not even be able to look. Isn't it kind of crazy? Yeah. No, it's not crazy. A little bit. It's human nature. It is. It's curiosity now. And not even to look, but like Woods was saying, I'll see if he posted something on some other girl's page and I'd immediately start thinking, oh, because I have a new girlfriend. What is that? What is that?
I would, I'm kind of like the boy, though, that touches the hot stove and learns because I don't want to get hurt. Yeah. I'm not. I'm the one that sees the red button that says do not touch and I'll dance around it and hover. But it hurts. Doesn't it hurt your heart? I don't want to get. Yes, it does. I'm like, oh, no. I don't have self-control. Oh, it hurts me. Oh, whenever I would break up with someone, delete from my phone. Their number is out. It's like people that when they're going through a rough breakup, listen to sad songs. Get sad songs away from me. Oh, really? Oh, yeah. Look at Pep and Woods high-fiving. I'm like, give me music that's like inspirational. Just listen to The Cure in my bedroom. There are like breakup moods, though. Like in the beginning, it's a little bit sad. And then you're like, okay, I need to be pumped up. And then you kind of go back to the sad a little bit. And then you get over it. Yeah, I get into a pod of sad music. Like Mikey when he sleeps. Oxygen fills the room. You breathe in. It's like, with or without you. No way. I'm just like L-O-B. Another way that Facebook has changed dating is relationships and breakups are public. So whenever you put...
In a relationship, everyone knows. Whenever is single, everyone knows. How bad do you feel for the person that puts is single? It's my favorite bit. When you see Mike Esparza is single and then there's 50 comments. Dude, what happened? No way. Are you kidding me? Crazy. Yeah, it's nuts. I don't like the opposite either. I gave my friends, Jay and Stacey, if you're listening, I gave them a hard time because they didn't call me up and tell me or email me or anything. Their status changed to is engaged. I'm like, oh. Congratulations. Oh, you found out on Facebook. I found out on Facebook. You don't want to find out on Facebook. No. You want them to tell you. Exactly. Yeah, but, like, you got to tell so many people. It's just so easy. M1Ray says, Mikey, before I break up with my ex, I delete her off Facebook. When she saw that, I did that, that she text messaged me that it was sad that I did that. Weird. Yep. So that's like, she must have known it was coming. He said he deleted her before he broke up with her? That's a good move. Ouch. That's a good move, pal. That's not very wise. Why don't you wait until after you do it? That's like... That's a preemptive. It's like having a new person sitting there in the office while you're firing somebody. Yeah. Oh, gosh. That's a good call. Right? Yeah. You're just like...
It's like someone's standing there with their pile of new stuff as you are putting your stuff into a cardboard box. They're like, excuse me. Come on, old man. I've been that guy. Yeah. Which guy? I've been the guy that was leaving and had a new guy that was starting that day looking at me like, really? This is where I signed up to work? This place is crazy. Yeah, because the guy that I'm replacing is watching me put my coffee cup down. Yep. And the picture of my wife that's framed. And I have to tell him that he forgot a framed picture of his wife. Yeah, for sure. So I have to be like, excuse me. I did the storm out, quit. And it was this kid's first day. Oh, my gosh. Oh, yeah. The storm out, quit. And this kid's first day. And he's like, wow. What did you see? I get to see you screaming and yelling. Oh, me too. A fit. I dropped a hammer. I dropped a hammer on a guy. What did you say? Well, he was being a D, and I called him on it, and we got into it, and I was like, you know what, dude? The guy firing you? He didn't fire me. I quit. It's a big difference, Mike. I don't work here anymore. I was like, you're a clown. I packed my stuff. I was like, I'm your top guy, dude. Good luck. You're a clown. I got, like, a huge commission check, and I need to live on nothing. But Woods, to his defense, he actually had big red floppy shoes and a flower lapel and squirted water. Yeah, and his bow tie was spinning in circles.
To his defense. That's all I'm saying. That's all I'm saying. Oh, this is really sad. There's two more. You want me to say them really quick? Yeah, yeah, go ahead. Sorry. You have a record every time you make a mistake on Facebook. You know, like you make a bad comment or something like that to an ex or a message, then it's always going to be there, just like an email. And the last one is other people's comments will make your date jealous. So if you just started dating someone, they may be checking out your wall on Facebook, and they're like, who's that guy? Like Woods would say something flirty to someone, you know, most likely. Maybe they keep their eyes on their own paper. Yeah, I'm a married man. Yes. No, but like innocent. You say sweetie and stuff like that. Yeah, or like looking good in the new profile pic. I always tell people their profile pic looks great. Guys and girls. Creep. But if you did that possibly to a girl that was just starting to date somebody, the guy might be like, who's this Mike Esparza? Who's this Mikey? Because they don't know yet. But he doesn't know you've been friends with.
Her for 17 years or whatever. I saw a friend of ours. A friend of ours or a friend of mine? Not mafia. Okay. Not in the mafia. Good. That's what they say in the mafia. Not a friend of ours. Not a friend of ours, but a friend of ours. Okay. And saw her at the meet and greet. A friend of Rebecca and I. And I gave her a big hug and I said, you look great. She does. You know, she looks like she's dropped some weight. She looks beautiful. and she introduced me to her new boyfriend who was standing next to her, and he shook my hand really hard. Oh, yeah, see? Misunderstanding. And there's a thing with a guy, okay? When you shake hands, there's a thing with a guy. You squeeze my hand a little too hard, buddy, I notice it. And so I gave him that look, like, really? Really? You know, there's a little PSI in that shake. There's a little pounds per square inch going on. Just notice that. Really? A little bit. That totally makes sense to me. That's something I never would have thought of. And don't PSI on me. No. Don't PSI my hand. Don't PSI my hand. Well, I shook someone's hand during Settle a Bet. Yeah. I went out on the streets and I shook someone's hand. And I was limp-wristed. I was like, wow, ow. Different context? Because there are some people that are just high PSI-ers. Yeah, maybe he just had a firm grip. Maybe.
But in context, there are some people that don't get it PSI-wise. You think? They're going to shake you too hard. But there are other people that you, for whatever reason, maybe they just don't like you. And they give you a hard PSI. And you're like, really? How about this guy that turns the hand over? You ever seen that bit? Yeah, where they turn the hand over. And he does this? Yeah. Hey, how you doing, pal? Yeah, you shake hands and they immediately turn their palm down. So now your hand is... That's weird. It's for dominance. I've never seen that. It's an old businessman's technique. Oh, I'm going to do it. And the best is two guys that both know the bit. And it's like arm wrestling. It's like arm wrestling. I grab my other hand and force it over. I've seen that before. I've seen the take out the one hand, flip it, and then sandwich it. I do the two-handed shake. Better than the dead fish. Oh, yeah. It's just like, uh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do that bit. Dead fish is weird. It's the worst when you have a ring on it. Real quickly, because we have to. I got a break, but real quickly, I want to tell you this, because it's very sad. As coroner, I hung up her. I thoroughly examined her. And she's not only merely dead. She's really most sincerely dead.
No creepier words have ever been spoken. Now we're about to say it. Did he die? He died. He died. His name is... Meinhardt Robb. Good work. 94 years old, yes. Sounds like a gentleman. He was the coroner of Munchkin City. That's right. And he died at the age of 94 on Friday. So creepy. Why is it creepy? That movie creeped me out to no end. Oh, I love that movie. And the munchkins the whole bit. Would you like to know that that same guy, after The Wizard of Oz, he went on to become a wartime aviator, and he was the first little Oscar of the Oscar Mayer Meat Company? Get out. Come on. I just read that. He was four feet, seven inches tall. Look at him. Mikey. Little stud. 94, though. That's crazy. That's a great long life. That's right. Our girl. Sienna is picking the music today. I performed this in a talent show, so you know. She did. Eighth grade? I actually played with Pete Townsend and Roger Daltrey. They flew in for the talent show. They flew in for my fifth birthday. I asked for them. First time I'd ever heard the record, I said, Mom, I want the who. I want the who. I want the who. I did. I had to dance. Since I was a young boy.
Like I was playing a pinball, you know? Isn't it funny how when you do something when you're four, you remember the dance. Oh, yeah. You remember it forever. Two huge stories out of Pittsburgh in Woods on Sports. Two huge stories out of Pittsburgh. One of them is going to shock you. It's about Ben Roethlisberger. And just think of all the stuff you know right now. What would shock you? What's he's going to tell you? Something big to report with Santonio Holmes, too. And we will do all of it. You're listening to The Mikey Show. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Long day, honey? Uh-huh. I desperately need a trip to Blissville. Let's go. I'm totally craving a frappe at Mickey D's. A frappe what? Frappe. You're not making any sense. A frappe, as in McCafe frappe? What are you talking about? McDonald's takes a little coffee magic ice.
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This report is brought to you by Jack in the Box. Come to Jack in the Box to try Jack's new fries. They're crispy, golden, delicious, and salted just right. And Jack's giving them away free during Free Friday on Friday, April 16th. Busy morning on the 15 northbound before Camino del Norte. A car spun out. It's blocking that lane just before the off-ramp. They have started a traffic break. All lanes are shut down right now. In La Mesa on the 8 eastbound before La Mesa Boulevard, a spin-out pickup truck could be blocking that right lane. overturned truck on the 5 southbound before the 52. It's on its roof on the right shoulder. This report brought to you by Pickup Sticks. For a great deal on freshly walked meals, check out the Dragon Deals value menu of Pickup Sticks. Six delicious meals, only $4.99 each. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. Now back to the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Rocky Mountains, made for great flavor. We brew with real barley. Nothing cold, filtered. It's all made the original way. The Coors way. Skinner. It's a simple man. It's good. Welcome back. What's that? Jay, the simple man. Yeah, is that the simple man with every toy imaginable in his garage? No, we were talking about before how he could just be dropped off in the middle of a forest. That's true. He can make his way out.
He would just fashion a koala into a helicopter. Exactly. Fly out. Fly out. You know what I mean? That's just fun. That's right. Welcome back to the show. It's a Mikey show, and we got a great program in store for you today. First of all, we do have a 911 call that we're going to be listening to later. It originates from England, so we'll be doing that. England. That's right. We got Settle a Bet. We sent Pepper out onto the streets. Lauren. To talk to some people. To pepper some people with questions. To pepper them with questions. She was signing at the meet and greet. Pepper. That's right. Con request. With my arm twisted behind my back. Sign it. That's right. I was signing get. I saw that. You were. I was. People were like, let's tell me to get. I know. I said to somebody, because I got the picture after you had already signed. I said. Did you do something to deserve that? No, I don't know what that's about. I loved it. Why were you signing on your face? Because I'm fat. That's why he did it. He signed over his face. If anybody has an autograph that's not on my face, it's worth an absolute fortune because every single one I signed right over my face. Try being pregnant and looking at those pictures that were posted from the event. No way.
my eyes watering. Are you kidding? No way. You looked gorgeous. I'm an emotional, emotional mess. We're all, we're all so hypercritical of ourselves that when I looked at it, I'm like, Hey, nice oil oozing out of your pores on your nose. We all, I was like, Man, could anyone have stood underneath two of my double chins? Mikey, I look like Lou Diamond Phillips in Stand and Delivered. I had like my head kicked back like I had a nine in my belt. I was like, good Lord. I was like thinking BMC. I'm like, how could anyone not call me a clown? What's BMC? Bird Mouse Clown. Oh, Bird Mouse Clown. Got it. All women either look like a bird mouse or a clown. We are going to get to the story out of Pittsburgh here in a minute, but obviously the biggest story of the day yesterday was the Masters and Phil Mickelson, who is genuinely one of the good guys in golf. Just a great, great dude, nicknamed Lefty. He won. Shot a 67. It's over? It's over. It's done. It's over, and it was really cool to see him win. Here he is talking about his day. Cut one.
Jim, it feels incredible. I mean, I could go on and on for so many reasons why, but to win this tournament, it's the most amazing feeling, and this has been a special day. You know, I'll look back on this day. It's very memorable. It's something I'll always cherish. Yeah, and what was really cool was that his wife, Amy, made it to the 18th green to see him win. For those of you guys that don't know, she's actually been battling breast cancer. She has not been traveling with him, but she made it to the green. Dude, when he won it and they hugged, I was sitting in my bed like... It was pretty emotional. It was so emotional, dude. Just because... I've been there with my wife. I couldn't imagine how he was feeling. You know what I mean? So it was really hit home with your boy here. Didn't he take some time off when they first announced that she had it? Absolutely. And she hasn't been to a tournament, I think, in over a year. So for her to be there on 18, he knocked in like a 15-foot birdie and finished in style. Yeah. It was so cool. Here he is talking about the emotional reunion cut to. It's been an emotional year, and I'm very proud of my wife and the fight and struggle she's been through. And, you know, it's been a difficult.
And to come out on top in this tournament is very emotional. It feels terrific and it's very emotional. Good job. So beautiful, too. And they just got such a beautiful family. It was really cool. I was really happy to see him win. And if you guys have been living in a cave, as you know, Tiger Woods had a little something to do in this tournament as well. It was his first Masters or his first tournament since the scandal broke about his sexual addiction. Dude finished fourth. I mean, pretty good. And he had really nothing in his bag. He had nothing. I mean, and still was battling. Finished in the top five. Here he is talking about his week. Cut three. Yeah, I finished fourth. Not what I wanted. I wanted to win this tournament. And as the week went on, I kept hitting the ball worse. I had better on Friday, but after that, it was not very good. So you're not going to use a different measuring stick to measure your performance this week. You're going to use your normal measuring stick of, I didn't win, therefore I'm not happy. Well, I entered this event, and I only enter events to win. and I didn't get it done. I didn't hit the ball good enough, and I made too many mistakes around the greens. Consequently, I'm out there. Here's my weirdness. I noticed his beautiful watch. He had the most beautiful watch. Is it a tag? Isn't he sponsored by tags? He's a tag hour guy. I think it is a tag, yeah. And tag hours are usually kind of small, and this was a very large fit. Now, guys, this is speaking of guys, because guys or watch,
Are into watches? Women, not so much. Yeah. Now I'm going to get 50 emails. I love watches. No, I agree with you. I think you can tell a lot about a man by the watch he wears. Love watches. And he had the most beautiful watch I've ever seen on. And I was like, man, I bet that's a $50,000 watch. I couldn't golf with him. I couldn't swing. He doesn't play with it on. Yeah, I couldn't do anything with it on. Yeah, you know, when I played the Masters the first time. Yeah, exactly. I couldn't. Well, today, you guys, is the Padres' home opener. They are off the road, and they are coming back. A little rocky start to the season. They've started 2-4. They take on the Braves today. The hometown boy, Kevin Correa, gets the start. I hope they'll be facing the Braves' good young pitcher, Jair Jurens. He's got some good stuff, man. It should be a good game. So we'll see how that shakes out. I think Dave Matthews is actually singing the... The National Anthem. Or not the National Anthem, but the Take Me Out to the Ball Game. Well. Well. Maybe. That's what I heard. For those of you going to the game today, I don't necessarily really want you to believe that Dave Matthews is going to be there. Just let me live my fantasy. Dave Matthews lives in our studio and he claims. He claims. He claims he's going to be playing. But he's a clown. He's a clown. He's high a lot. So when he says that, I would.
Take it with a grain of salt. A grain of something. A grain of tequila. Yeah, take it with a grain of tequila. Well, like we said in the opener, there's big news out of Pittsburgh. Shockingly enough, Ben Roethlisberger will not be indicted or charged for sexual assault. There were, quote, unquote, too many uncertainties to move forward with an indictment. Wow. So he beats the rap again. Way to go, Big Ben. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I mean, when you say he beats the rap. It trips me out because what if he really didn't do anything? You know what I mean? What if he did? But he just got, the charges were just dropped. He, I think, is a man who was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. Again, he beat the rap. And then also the other big story, I was shocked. I was watching Masters highlights last night and they said, San Antonio Holmes has been traded to the New York Jets for a fifth round pick. This is their Super Bowl MVP, one of their best players. Word is coming down that he's probably going to have a four-game suspension due to the league's substance abuse policy. Guy has a history of smoking the chronic, and I think he may have been popped again. So he's probably going to face a four-game suspension to begin the year. Dude, I think the Jets are looking filthy, dude. Sanchez, Braylon Edwards, they got LT. Now they got Santonio Holmes.
Kind of the team to beat now. Yeah. And they're looking good. K-E-T-S. Yeah? We never talk hockey on this show, but there was something that happened yesterday I had to mention. You guys know what a shootout is? If they go through overtime, if they finish the overtime, what happens is the goalie gets in the net, then they pick, I think, three or four of their best players, and they try to score on the goalie. It's a shootout. Yeah, in hockey. Oh. Yeah. Oh, I thought you said cocky. He doesn't talk about cocky very often on this show, but sometimes he does. I was like, where is he going with this? We don't have a team. Well, anyway, it was the last day of the season. Win and you're in for these two teams. The Flyers, which is where Lauren's from. Philadelphia. Yeah, and the New York Rangers. So win and you're in, right? Yeah. They go to overtime. It's not settled. So then they go to a shootout. to see who wins to go to the playoffs, which was a really cool thing. Obviously, you guys don't think it's as cool as I did. I do. Yeah, that is awesome. But the Flyers stopped the Rangers and we'll be advancing. It's pretty cool if you guys had any idea what I was talking about. No, I am. And then there was an interesting weekend in baseball, too. The ace of the Yankees threw a one-hitter against the D-Rays, and I was watching that game. It was very, very exciting. This is pretty interesting. The Pirates gave up 13 runs.
In one inning. Whoa. It was so bad, the D-backs pitcher, Edwin Jackson, had two hits in the inning, including a homer. The 13 runs that they scored is the same number that the 0-6 Houston Astros have scored all year. Really? And that is Woods on Sports. You've known them. You've seen them. They may even be you. Woods just points them out. It's time for Dude, You're Dumb. In just a minute, we're going to be telling you what Jim Carrey... was saying about Tiger Woods' wife on Twitter. Speaking of dude, you're dumb. I mean, it is firing a lot of people up. And we'll tell you about it after dude, you're dumb. By the way, if you have a dude, you're dumb, call us 5701-949. Or you can text us 949mikey at gmail.com. What is dude, you're dumb? That guy. That guy. Dude, you're dumb is that guy that does those ridiculous things out in public that drive you batty.
Would you give us an example? I've got some good ones today, dude. Do you want them all? Just give me a few. Give you a few. Speaking of golf and the Masters and sports, the guy who has to scream, get in the hole! Oh, that guy. After every single shot. Sienna, you don't watch golf, right? No. You don't watch it. No. So watch me tee off here. Mikey, you be that guy. You ready? I'll be the announcer. You be the guy. I'll be the guy. I'm ready. Here's Woods on the first tee. Get in the hole! Only one guy does it. There's always that dude. Get in the hole? Get in the hole. There's always this guy that you hear in the background. Every time somebody takes a shot, there's one dude that has to be the get in the hole guy. So then I go up. I've hit it down the middle. Get up there. I got my seven iron. Get in the hole. Every hole, there's that get in the hole guy. Get in the hole.
The ball. Is that the phrase they say every time? Every single time. Oh, that is so doodoo dumb. And you think in your head, you're like, it's you, huh? Yeah. So that'd be like going to a base. It's like you go to the Padres home opener today. Guy throws a pitch. He swings. Home run! Yes. Or every time Phillip Rivers drops back, you just go, touchdown! But you know why it's even worse? It's the worst. Do you know why it's even worse? Because at those games, it's not dead quiet. It's like dead quiet. And there's the guy and he's like, I think I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. Don't do it. You've had way too much strength. Don't do it. Do not. Get in the hole. No, I think that guy doesn't even have to think about it. He's like, I'm the guy that screams get in the hole. It's just like his nature. Maybe like the tennis players that grunt, like they can't control it. Exactly. The next day at work. Did you hear me? Did you guys hear me? Did you guys hear me? Yeah, you're that. Yeah, we heard you. We heard you, Tad. We heard you, Tad. That's pretty close to my husband's name. Is this Tad Belchick, the guy that was in Rebecca's email? Yes, Tad Belchick. The fictitious person that you made up that writes my wife. And then Lauren goes on to her Facebook wall and goes, who's Tad Belchick? Rebecca's like, the guy you made up. Stirring the pot real good. Well, I ran into this one this weekend, and this one slays me.
Jamie and I are having lunch and I'm listening to this conversation and this girl is like, I call it the you're all person. And I was all, no way. And she was all, are you kidding me? And then he was all, no way. Don't say you're all, dude. It's your native tongue. You learn to speak it. Okay? Real good. Are you that guy? Woodsy is not a you're all. He was all. She was all, no way. Are you going to the party? And I was all, no way. I'm not going to that guy's party. And then she was all, you're kidding. I say I was like a lot. That's even better. Are you sure? Now I feel. See, I was looking at Sienna because I thought that that was a Southern California thing because I always said, and then I was like, and she was like, which is a bad habit anyway. I say the like. But I thought. I say the like, it's fine. I'll catch myself doing it sometimes because I thought it was like a. a SoCal thing since I've moved here. I'm like, and I was all. You did not do that. I charge my kids a dollar for every time they say like if it's not appropriate in the sentence. Good for you, dude. That's great. Jay, will you do that for me? Don't do it. Teach them to speak their native tongue, my brother. If you're an adult male, I don't think you should say was all. Girls, it's almost okay.
With, for dudes, no. No way. Sometimes it's said in the context of, and I was all, whoa, shoot out the back like a gnarly. We got a phone one. Woods, do you want it? Yeah, sure. And one, Aaron, give me a dude you're dumb. Aaron, are you there? Yeah, yeah, I'm here. Give me a dude you're dumb. Well, I got a buddy who, we go out, a bunch of couples go out and say we go to Olive Garden and he and his wife aren't exactly the, the most polite people in the world, but in the middle of dinner, sitting in the middle of a restaurant, drinking beer, drinking wine, eating food, and he just finds it necessary to burp, like guttural belches, three, four times per meal. And it will completely just... At the Olive Garden. I won't do it at dinner. Yeah. He won't. That's what I'll throw in a... I'll do it on the air. Yeah. Wait a minute.
It's not like a completely subtle belt, but it's like one that just makes the room go silent. Oh, gosh. That's ridiculous. Sienna, your husband Todd doesn't do that one, does he? No, but he passes gas every now and again, and I cough to cover it. But sometimes you can't help if you have to burp. Yeah, but there's a difference between... I can see him dropping the fork and going... This guy's the purposeful belcher. It's a proud belcher. It's gross if the entire restaurant can hear it. It does on purpose. The proud belcher. Oh, like that was a good meal. That could ruin an entire restaurant's meal. Hearing that? Yeah. Because that makes some people lose their appetite. Smelling that. It's a great dude. You're dumb. I got another great one. Go ahead. How about whistling guy? How about, okay, you're a hot blonde. You're walking down the street, and this construction worker decides, you know what? Hey, girl. He grabs his buddy. He gets them involved. And, you know, you're the girl, and you're thinking, you know what? I think I would like a little piece of that grimy scumbag over there. You know what? Exactly. Hey, pal. Hey, pal. Only in adult films does that go down, okay? It doesn't happen in real life, all right? So, dude, you're dumb, too. You're dumb. It's the same as the honk bye. The honk bye? Give him the cat call real quick?
Hey, girl. When will that stop? Never. Sienna. It's been going on since the beginning of time. Sienna and Pepper. Yes. Do you, if a guy cat calls you. Yeah. At a construction site. If he whistles at you. So annoyed right now. Yeah. Is there any part of you that feels flattered or is it all gross? I don't even look at them. It's all gross and embarrassing. I just keep my head straight ahead and I walk even faster. I change spots on the street. Like I'll cross the street to get away from them. Pepper. You know, there's been a handful of times where they'll throw in something either polite or funny. Really? That makes me laugh. And I'll, like, laugh and wave at them. Can you think of an example of a construction worker, clever, funny, or polite catcall? It's usually, like, it's the bailout from the person who didn't initiate it. It's like the first person is like... Or whatever that whistle is that they do, the piercing whistle. Right. And then his buddy would be like, you look lovely today. Have a beautiful day, miss. Sorry, he's an idiot. Yeah, exactly. And then that makes me like, yeah, okay, yeah, you two guys. Then it's kind of cute. Yeah. I always get compared to like a celebrity like, hey, Britney Spears. You know, like, what? I get it. Hey, Chaz Bono, you're looking good. Hey, what's up, Herve Villachez? How's Ricardo Montal?
You getting off the island today, pal? Good for you, little guy. Can I dream up a fantasy that I wish I had? Little man? I hate it. Okay, so yeah, Jim Carrey was criticizing Elon Woods. Yeah, Tiger's wife. On Twitter? Yeah, this happened on Friday. And in case you didn't know, Jim Carrey's been in the news a lot recently because he and Jenny McCarthy broke up last week. It was a big deal to a lot of people. So he's been on Twitter a lot. People have been following his tweets. So on Friday, I'm just going to read you exactly what he said. Tiger Woods owes nothing to anyone but himself. To please his father, he gave up his childhood and his freedom in the world. That's enough. No wife is blind enough to miss that much infidelity. Elin had to be a willing participant on the ride for whatever reason. No woman just stays at home with the kids anymore. Tiger was wrong and Elin was ignoring the obvious. To me, that's dumb. First of all. Dude, you're dumb. That's the longest Twitter I've ever heard.
It was a special Twitter. No, it was three different ones. Oh, okay. Oh, so he was like, send, write, write, write, send, write, write, write, send. He goes on and even says some more, saying how we just love misery. You know, people love misery and stuff like that. Well, first of all, I don't necessarily agree with Jim. But even if I did, unnecessary to write. Yeah. Why are you writing that? You know why he's writing it. Because he's getting a divorce? Justify something. He's in that mood of, I hate women. And hey, it may come out that Jim Carrey is kind of a dirtbag dude, dude. Like he's saying, Tiger doesn't know anybody anything. I just think that it's strange to vilify. somebody that's just gone through something pretty bad. She's a victim, dude. I mean, there's no doubt about the fact that she is a victim. And she hasn't come out and said anything public one way or another. She's taken the high road of like, look, this is Tiger's bed. He can lay in it. So I don't understand why she would get any pointed attack. She hasn't even said one way or the other. Absolutely. I think that you guys are 100% right. There's no way that was necessary for him to say. But I do kind of think he has a point.
Well, maybe even if he did, you know what I mean? Even if he did, it's like unnecessary. Poor Elin. All right. She needs more of this. Maybe she was on to him the whole time and it all finally came out. You know what I mean? Who knows if she could have all along been suspecting him behind closed doors and saying things. So for him to speculate that she just turned a blind eye, maybe she just didn't want to air her entire life on Twitter. They asked to speak in a tiger. They asked him yesterday about letting his emotions show. There's a fine line. Any one of us who's played golf knows between controlling your emotions and eliminating them on the golf course. And to me, through the first five or six holes today. If you didn't know, Tiger was kind of having little tantrums out there. Weird. It's his bit. He still was having tantrums? He promised he was going to, you know, I'm not going to do that anymore. And I really am going to respect the game. That's a big thing for a lot of those old timers. You'd never see Jack Nicklaus or Arnold Palmer or Tom Watson. You'd never see those guys doing this. Yeah. Mikey and I were texting about it. I mean, it's tough to watch. Yeah. I wanted to be, you know, I want to kind of support Tiger. But I said to Rebecca, man, he's making it kind of hard. So he just acts like a baby? He acts like a baby. He drops the GDs and the JCs. And it's like, dude, you're on the...
freaking TV, man. You're like, come on, bro. There's little kids watching it. He just hits one. He's like, GD! Happy Gilmore style. He's happy Gilmore. Here's one of them where he gets on himself. Tiger Woods. Suck! He says to himself, Tiger Woods, you suck. Oh my goodness. I say that to myself. Tiger Woods. Son of a bitch. And then he throws the GD. Oh, my gosh. And then the guy goes, I don't think he's very happy with that shot. Really? You think so, Captain Obvious? Why do you think that? I understand why he would want to do it, but it's like, do you know how many people are watching you right now? You don't want to make anyone mad. I can't say anything, though. M1 Steve-O. What's up, guys? What up? Hey, listen, I totally agree with Jim Carrey.
I think I'm that guy. I feel that, I mean, who's Elin? Who's Elin Woods without Tiger? Yeah, why does that make it okay, though? It doesn't make it okay. All I'm just saying is, like, you got these girls marrying rock stars for the money. It's like you got to go along for the ride. Like, what was Elin before she was Tiger? You almost got to expect that type of infidelity, you know, if you're dating someone like that, if you're married to someone like that. Well, who's Elin after Tiger? Well, now she's Tiger's ex-wife that was cheating on us. famous now, but I mean, I don't know. I agree with Jim Carrey's comment. Well, I might agree with it too, but here's my big question to you, Steve-O. What do you think about him Twittering that? Is that cool or uncool? Like you guys said, he's going through a breakup with Jenny McCarthy, so he's probably like super anti-chick right now, but I agree with Jim 100%.
Maybe you should have put it on Twitter, but I don't think Jim would be cheating on Jenny McCarthy, though. What do you guys think? Well, first of all, I don't think Elan is using this as leverage to do anything. She's staying out of the limelight, and she was actually a model before she met Tiger. Yeah, because when you say, you know, who was she before Tiger, it almost implies like, yeah, you know, since she married Tiger, she's got all this. And so why are we feeling sorry for her? That's what it implied to me. And I'm like, no, I mean, she stayed back. She fell in love with a dude and married him. You see her less now that she's married to Tiger than he did when she was a model. And, you know, the bottom line is, too, man, she's a mom and she's, you know, she's the victim here. There's no question about it. Absolutely. I agree with that. I wasn't saying Tiger's a great guy. I'm just saying, you know, you got to, if you're a girl marrying a guy like Tiger Woods or anybody, that has that type of money and that type of fame.
You know, that infidelity, I mean, nine times out of ten goes along with me. I agree with you, dude. I agree with you. I really do in that regard. I mean, sometimes it's kind of like, what, are you surprised? I mean, we talked about it last week. I've argued Stevo's same point because I think, you know, and we've talked about this before, Mike, is that I think if you're going to go up and marry someone like that, you have to know in the back of your mind that it's a little more likely that it's going to happen to you than the average Joe because this guy's worth billions and girls are going to be throwing themselves at him every day. So then can we say that about Phil Miller? And can we say that about all those guys? But we don't know. Right. But I know we don't know. But what we just said was. Yes, we can say that. So we have to. Okay. So then that means that we need to say to Dana Mickelson. Amy Mickelson. Amy Mickelson. We have to say, hey, Amy, just so you know, you're married to the guy that won the Masters yesterday. Just so you know, I hope you know, he's. Probably cheating. Nobody said probably. No, I don't think anyone needs to say that. We said nine times out of ten. He did. We didn't say that. Oh, well, then I thought we were saying, like, don't be. Okay. Let me rephrase. Amy, if Phil cheats on you, don't be surprised. After all, he is a millionaire and a, you know. You can be surprised. Just like all of us were surprised that Tiger Woods cheated. We were shocked. But, you know what? I just think it's.
I thought we said don't be surprised. No, it's just it's more likely that it happens to a billionaire, a millionaire, someone who's on TV every day. Because look at the Steelers right now. Look at everyone that's going through all these problems. Girls throw themselves at them and they do anything they can to get in the media. They face more temptation, but they don't have any less willpower than any of us. That is true. No, that's true. I got a few things your pharmacist is not telling you. I did things. I'm not proud. Sienna is picking the music today. Little Carrie and Last Name. I like this stuff. It's so great. Listen, I wouldn't download it because I just can't reconcile downloading it in my guy-ness. There's some things I can't. Listen, I got my weird line. That's my line. Maybe I would. Miley's okay? Miley's okay? Exactly. Miley's okay. I just in my head went, really? So Miley, you can download. You drove to work this morning singing that, what is it? Whatever. When I look at you. When I look at you. Carrie Underwood is more manly than Miley Cyrus. I'll download this today. It's so good. And we got a 9-1-1 call because something happened in England had to do with a cat. Tell you about it coming up. We're going to give away some prizes too.
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Financial media station, the new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. In just a few minutes, we're going to be doing what a 911 call might sound like with a story that happened in Britain with a cat. We're also going to be giving you a chance to win a prize with our version of Name That Tune, which usually gets very passionate. It does, doesn't it? Oh, it gets heated. It gets heated when we play it. Because Sienna, Woods, and Pepper get very into the game. That's right. They're playing for you, the listener. So you really get into it. The Mikey Show is made up of five people, myself, Woodsy, Pepper, Sienna, and Jay. We all vary in age from 25 to 46. I've got a few things that your pharmacist won't tell you. I want to know this. I always have the same thing happen to me, by the way.
I always have my, if it says brand name only, I always get generic and have to give it back to them and say, this is generic. It's supposed to be brand name. Every time. It says here, generics are a close match for most brand names. I actually prefer the generics now. I actually prefer generic over the brand name. Why? I noticed that it works better for me than the brand name. That's weird. I know. I get scared to use the generic stuff. You do? Weird. Yeah. Mom. Mom, I've never heard of this before. Can Bill Fizer come over here? Doesn't Daddy play golf with him? Doesn't Daddy play golf with Johnson or Johnson? I'd like to see my dad golf. Yeah, right. He's a surfer. Doesn't he go sailing with them? Mom, doesn't...
Dad play polo with Mr. Pfizer. Didn't you just have dinner with him at the country club? She just had dinner with them. Didn't he just buy their entire family and company steaks? I should get the hookup on some name brands. You should. What do they say that your pharmacist won't tell you? Well, that was one of them. Also, a lot of times they can't read your doctor's handwriting just like you can't. Yeah, because he writes with his foot, it looks like. Yeah, why did he do that? Why? I don't know. It's like this is a medication I'm about to take. It's because when they were little kids, they dreamed of being a doctor. And now that they're a doctor, they're like, I'm going to do what I remember growing up seeing. And now that's me. It's my turn to write like a weirdo. See that squiggle mark? That's Lipitor. Hello. Now I guess 20% of prescriptions which are electronically transmitted. So there's no mistakes. But still. You can never read handwriting. Yeah. I can't tell you the last time I got a prescription. I know. Me neither. Couldn't do it. Well, Woodsy doesn't because he doesn't like going to the doctor. What's your excuse, Pep? I find the natural. Oh, boy. The natural equal. I'll tell you why, Mike, because I know how to steep seaweed. That's right. I love oil. That's right. I stay away from them at all costs. You do? Mm-hmm. So you just come up with those home remedies.
Yeah, unless the doctor says, no, you absolutely, like I need vitamin B12 and there's no like, I mean, vitamin B12 is not synthetic, but you know, there's no other supplement for that. Do you come up with a remedy for antibiotics? Yeah. You do? Mm-hmm. Oh, wow. Yeah. Sometimes, unless I have something like strep throat where I know I need to knock it out. And then I'll get really crazy and I'll steep some cornwood. Cornwood is a very particular type of wood that you find in the Australian jungle. No, I came in and I did it. But I was without health insurance for a couple years, so I had to be real creative. Yeah, now that you have insurance, why don't you get some Amphicillin? I mean, I'm just saying. You know why I won't do it? I don't know how. I don't know how to go to it. I don't know what to do. I don't trust myself. I'll take you to the Dr. Woods. I don't know what to do. Like, this arm is killing me. I want to go to an orthopedic surgeon. Can we help you? Is there a book that shows me who I can go to that's not going to cost me an arm and a leg? Here's what you do. First of all, you need to find a doctor. A general practitioner. A general practitioner who is, I'll tell you, it's very easy. We have, because we work for this company, Lincoln Financial. Yeah, we work for an insurance company, Lincoln Financial. So they have a little booklet just like every company, everybody listening right now.
If they have insurance, they work for a company that gives them insurance. They got a little booklet that says, go to this doc. It's usually online. They'll tell you in your area. Go to this doc. Do I have to have a login and stuff? Because I don't have one. No. I don't blame them for that. Just call the number in the back of your car. I don't know. Call the number in the back of your car. Tell them your zip code. They'll give you a couple choices. I'll make it easy. I'll give you my doctor's name and his location, and you can just come out there and go. Does that work to her insurance? Yes. Why would I go to him if he didn't take her insurance? I did that for Jay, too. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah, I wanted a trusted doctor in the area. I asked Jay. Can he look at my arm? Yeah. I'm going to do that, too. I'm just going to go to Jay's. We'll all go to Jay's. There we go. Let's all go together. Let's all go in there together and say, we don't know what we need, but check us. We better not start telling our secrets to each other. I know. Hey, what was up with Lauren's rash? It was that huge mole on Mikey's neck. What is that thing on Mikey's neck that will not go away? What is that? You just made me itch my own neck. That Mikey has to say to his wife before they go anywhere, can you put makeup on this? Can you conceal this, please? Can you conceal this? Amazing. So that's how you do it. You just ask a friend, and the friend will take you to his doctorate. Let's go. What do I have to pay? Do I have to pay? Here's a co-pay. Probably, yeah. 20 bucks. What else? It's not bad. They do not recommend a drive-thru pharmacy, but pharmacists won't tell you that. Why?
Since they're not serving fries there, they're distracted. You know, it's a lot more distracting, I guess. That's what I do every time. Yeah, they give you Dilaudid instead of Xanax. A drive-thru, really? Yes. I don't even know where there is a drive-thru in La Jolla. Can you think how much better it would be if there were French fries served? Xanax from the skies in La Jolla. You didn't know that? French fries and a prescription? I am in. That would be awesome. When I go, I just ask for number one. I love the number one. You guys. They don't deliver your scripts? There's one. I know that's someone that delivers, but I've never heard of it. I'm sure. Yeah, in La Jolla. Yeah. Yeah, you guys, they don't, like, bring your prescriptions to your house and, like, mill them in a mortar and pestle? No, mill them. You have to go to the pharmacy first. You have to give me your prescription. They say, do you want to wait? I'm like, no. No, bring it to my home. Are you kidding? No. Of course not. I'm from LJ. Unbelievable. Plebeian. My driver does not like to wait in the parking lot of CVS. He's very bitchy. My driver, he does get bitchy. So I just have him deliver. What else? The pharmacist will not tell you. Don't try to get anything past them. They know everything about the stuff that you're trying to get. Painkillers, sleeping aids, they know the difference. Yeah. So don't try to convince them. Right.
They hate our insurance companies as much as we do most of the time because they're the one that has to talk to them and then deliver the bad news to us. No, they're not going to cover that. I'm sorry. And then we scream. We get all of it too. Pharmacists give flu shots in most states. Here's something. A less qualified pharmacy technician may have actually failed your prescription because there's no national standard for training or responsibility. Anyone back there will do it. Not like a certified doctor necessarily. It's someone in training can do it just as well as the doctor. You know what I've never done? And I wonder if anybody ever listening has ever done this. I've never counted my medication to see that they do it right. That's a good point. Never have either. Can you imagine? If, you know, you're supposed to get 30, you get 12. You don't even notice it. You would notice that. Well, okay, let's say you're supposed to get 30 and you get 25. Yeah. You wouldn't notice it. And somebody's pocketing them maybe. What if? Yeah, could be. Because, you know, what they don't do is they usually say, you know, before you leave, they say, can you look at that and make sure it's right? What if you were to dump all the pills out on the table? One, two, three, four, five. Oh, hold on. One, two. Wait. Hang on. One. Catherine Hepburn picking up a prescription. Two. Three. Pharmacists are human, too. Apparently, they make up to two million mistakes a year. Oh, perfect. Mm-hmm. Wow.
In the U.S. Wonderful. Great. It says, ask if we use a barcode system that helps keep us from pulling the wrong drug off the shelf or giving the wrong strength of the right drug. Weird. So they'll do that. The wrong strength of the right drug. That would be bad. Oh, yeah, it would. You got to check it, man. You got to look. They can give you a generic refill that's different from the one you started with. Give you a generic refill that's different than the one you started with. What does that mean? Different than the name browns. Oh. Oh, try to sneak one past the kid. Got it. Yes. Got it. Is that it? No, there's a couple more. Avoid the lines. And this is a good tip. I mean, this makes sense. Monday and Tuesday evenings are the most busy by far at any pharmacy because, you know, of the weekend wait. So don't go on Monday or Tuesday evening. Okay. And, yeah, yelling at them won't help, blah, blah, blah. There's just some basic ones, but those are the good ones. Tell us, Sienna, about the story coming out of England about the cat. Okay. What is this? Well, there's a woman who lives in England and her cat, Tiger, 19 years old, geriatric cat that's been attacking the postal workers there.
They call them posties. The posties. Yeah, that's what they call them over there. And the royal mail will no longer deliver mail to this person's house because the cat will scratch people. And there's been several different encounters. And so no one will deliver the mail to this house because they're scared of the cat. So now the woman has to go to the post office, like, you know, the local post office to pick up her mail. No one will go to her house. Such a beating every day. Imagine that. It'd be the worst. What would that 911 call sound like? Oh, yes, hello. Who am I speaking with? This is the emergency services operator. Oh, yes. What's your name, darling? I'm called Thaddeus. Oh, Thaddeus, how are you? Good. I'm calling. You'd never believe it. Oh, quiet now, Alyssa. I have this preposterous thing that's happening. I have a 19-year-old cat.
His name's Lester. Hello, darling. Good gracious, that's an old cat. Yes, he's 19 years old. He's fairly harmless. Oh, stop it, Lester. But from time to time, he gets a little feisty. But what cat doesn't? You know what I'm saying? Oh, I definitely do, yes. Oh, so these dreadful posties, they've come to tell me they won't deliver the mail to my house because they're afraid of dear Lester. That's awful. Can you believe it, Lester? Stop. Biting. Stop biting mommy's ankles. So, anyway, can you leave this? Is there something I can do to maybe... Can you force them to deliver to my house? Well, absolutely. That's secondarily, though. First, let's deal with the issue of Lester. Is that his name? Yes, Lester. He's such a dear. Sorry about your ankles. May I speak with him? Absolutely, Lester. The man wants to speak with you. Be nice. Hello. Hello, Lester. Hello. How are you? I'm well. You're 19 then. I am. That's very old. Listen, Lester, you can't just go attacking the posties. Why not? Well, because they're posties. They work for the government. And if you're caught red-handed, you could be apprehended and taken in for quite a while. I'm a cat.
Yes, I realize this. But you can't just go around attacking the posties. You're getting to great trouble. I'm 19, which means I'm like 170 years old. Right. And what trouble could I be to some clown mailman? Well, obviously, you've gotten into some trouble because your owner is calling emergency services. So you've already impeded upon the postie. And so if you draw blood, just so you know, you could be in grave danger. I don't even have teeth. I'm a cat. I'm 19. I have no teeth left. Have you claws? I have claws. They're nubs. They're like nubs. Well, they're certainly not. I think the posties are kind of a little girlish. Well, perhaps the posties are human beings and they're tired of a 19-year-old Lester attacking and lifting their ankles. I'm a cat. Understand this. Lester, put your mother back on the phone. Hold on. He is a cat. There's absolutely no reasoning with Lester. Oh, tell me about the deal. But that's what makes him so lovable. He's quite a character. Oh, Lester, that's venomous. That's awful. That's simply awful. Well, I'm going to send someone down to speak with you, dear. Okay. Do you think that they could maybe strong-arm the posties and get them to change their minds? I think if Lester doesn't mind his P's and Q's, we might be putting little Kitty...
Handcuffs on him or something. Oh, dear. Yes. That's quite serious. I'm sending an officer down to have a talking to with Lester. Oh, well, thank you, Thaddeus. I hope we can work this out. Thank you so much. Oh, have a lovely day. Goodbye. Bye-bye. Never heard of a talking cat before. Me either. It's amazing. The old one, right? Learned a lot in his age. He didn't pick up the English accent either. No. He's an American cat. You know that. You know that. You know that. It's plenty in that tune. Oh. Uh-oh. I think we're going to have to do that. We don't have enough time. Not enough time, right? It's not enough? Not enough. Excuse me. You know what I do have? What? You know what I do have time for? What? Saturday Night Live this weekend did a parody of Tiger Woods' Nike commercial. It's good. If you're just crawling out of a rock and you don't know about it, Tiger Woods came out with a new Nike commercial where his dad...
Says to him, what were you thinking? It's old audio of his dad before his dad died that he just used for that purpose. So Saturday Night Live did this parody of it. Tiger, I know this goes without saying, but when I'm gone, please don't use my voice in a commercial. And if you do, please don't make it for a commercial trying to sell sneakers. After a sex scandal. But you know that, right? You know that. You know that. Should we do the name that too when we come back then? Yeah. Want to know how to get a drink at a busy bar? All right, forget it then. Yes, I do. Let's do it. Come on. I want to know. I don't even drink I want to know. Got subtle abet coming up too. It's a busy Monday. Dude, very. Be very careful out on the roadways. There's a bit of moisture on the road.
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Very busy morning. The 5, rather, northbound before East Street. An accident. A car's missing. A left rear tire. They've called a tow truck. This is in Chula Vista. Also a problem here on the 163 northbound right before Balboa Avenue. We've got a pickup truck landed on its roof in the ice plant. It's over on the right shoulder waiting on a tow truck there, too. And the 5 northbound after Old Town Avenue. We've got an accident again sitting on that left shoulder. Looks like it's got possible injuries. An ambulance is on the way. This report is also brought to you by Big O Tire. It's a Big O Tire's one-price sale by any size Tempest Touring Tire, just $64.99 each. The one-price sale for the Big O Tire store nearest you. Call 1-800-NEW-TIRE. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. What's happening? This is Bird from Dragon Eyewear with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Monday morning. Brought to you by Guayaki Urbamate. Be Guayaki. Surf-wise today, looking pretty messy out there. We've got that storm front on us, obviously, bringing on some strong southwesterny winds for the most part, and some rain to go right along with that decreasing small combination, west-southwest, some northwest. It means smaller surf as well as it's being messy and pretty stormy-looking overall. Looking at waves in that need-to-waste-high zone, chest-high sets, and occasional larger waves. The standout spot's still open to the predominant southwest low direction.
And pretty much almost poor across the board. Might be a little cleaner in the far north county where the winds aren't quite as bad. But still, lots of winds on some broken up, crossed up lines and peaks. Plus, you've got dirty water to contend with as well. So, I'm staying past for right now. Maybe late today, but right now, not looking so good. For up to the minute surf reports and forecasts, go to surfline.com. And for everything you need in order to go surf, check out what a South Coast surf shop is at five locations. Or go online at southcoast.com. Again, this report is brought to you by Guayaki Urbamate, and it can only be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. The FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Back to the Mikey Show. Mikey. Don't really like to swim. Unlike most Latinos. Sienna. Every time I go to the grocery store, I know someone practically in every aisle. Woods. The best move you ever made. Footloose. Lauren. I have to admit, I like partying in the USA. And Jay. I don't watch sports. I have nothing to do. If I'm not playing, I don't want to see it. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Josie's on a vacation for the show tonight. Sienna. Yo. Where did you find the acoustic version of this? My husband found it, you know that? Of course. I love it. That's honey. That's honey in my ears. Creepiest song ever, by the way.
Why? What is he talking about? Slaying some girl while his old lady's out of town. Is it really? All right. Ready? Josie's on a vacation far away. Come around and talk it over. There's so many things I want to say. You know, I like my girls a little bit older. Creepy. Going for the cougars. I just want to use your love tonight. Weird. Maybe she's Josie. Maybe Josie's not his wife. Josie's on a vacation far away. Yeah, maybe he's talking about... This girl is only in town. Later, no, no. Later he says, stay the night, but keep it undercover. Oh, creepy. Very creepy song. It's like Stevie Wonder's part-time lover song. Yeah, totally. Just a little, just get a little taste. You know what makes it even creepier? In both cases, they're doing it. You know, it's like real cute and bubbly and everything. Let's talk and dance about cheating. Yeah. It's crazy that we all love the song and none of us even knew that. Except for us. I cheat on you because you're out of town already. It's messed up. I didn't even realize it. Listen to the words next time you hear that song. It's creepy. Dave Matthews adds a few of those. He does. Yeah, he does. Say goodbye is one of them. We're going to be giving you tips on how to get a drink.
At a busy bar. We're talking about you, Dave. Great. Talk to you in a minute. Pipe down. We got tips on how to get a drink at a busy bar. But first, we're going to play Name That Toon. What's the prize that we're going to give away, Jay? Standing up. Of course. I get to play today. Yeah. Jay, what is the prize that we have to give away? We have a pair of Anarchy sunglasses. Oh, cool. Yeah, they're nice. Cool. Call us right now. 570-1949. Pick a horse. Today, you have a list of four to choose from. Myself, Woodsy, Pepper, and me. I was getting tired of beating just these girls. This is Mikey's first time playing this game, so it's a big deal. That's right. So Jay is going to be the guy that points to us to chime in, or what? Yeah, he's going to be the guy that points to us to chime in. He calls on us. What do you mean? Like, we'll say... Woods! Yeah, Woods. Yes. He'll be the guy that, yes. He's a judge. The referee. The emcee. The coach. Master ceremonies. So we're going to look at him from in there? No, he's going to come in here. Oh, okay. Yep. Well, you know what? While we're waiting to line people up for that, why don't we do the tips on how to get a drink at a busy bar? Okay. Always, always tip. Yeah. So, like, if you're up there and it's crowded and you finally get a drink, throw him the fattest tip you've ever...
Because he's going to remember it. And he's going to spot you. And he's going to be like, that guy throws money down. I'm going to him next. That makes sense. Worst thing is, though, if you do tip the guy big and he doesn't remember you. It's the worst. Oh, yeah. But you can't say, dude, I greased you a 10 for a beer. You know what I mean? Why can't you say that? Because you're a clown. Is that how big of a tip we're talking? Like if you order a beer and that's your first drink, you have to throw an additional 10 down? If it's packed. If it's packed. And when I used to go out and blow it out. I'd leave like a 10 or maybe even a 20 on two drinks and be like, hey, dude. And I'll save. Remember your boy. That's a lot. Yeah. But do you think he knows he's not going to tip me that much when I come to him the next time? What's another one? Also, know what you're going to order before you start yelling for service. So many people do that. So they go, hey, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude. And he comes over and you're like, yeah, man, what do you need? Dude, what do you need? Oh, man. Hey, bro, I'm busy. I'm really busy. What's up? Do you guys have peach schnapps? What do you want? It's my girlfriend. What do you want, dude? She's drunk. Dude, what do you want? I'm trying to tell you, sweetheart. Oh, my God. Hang on. Dude, don't go away. You have peach schnapps. She wants peach schnapps? Peach. Does that have little flakes? Does that have flakes in it, dude? No, it doesn't. You're getting a Budweiser. What is that one that has the flakes? Enjoy. You're getting a Budweiser. No, I don't like beer. I can't drink beer. Later. Who's next?
You just did exactly one of the things they say not to do, Mike, is dude, partner, scout, bro, boss, chief, hey. Scout. Yeah. I love it. Scout. Scout. Scout. Do you like when people call you boss? Yeah, I love it. You do? I just don't like chief. Okay. Why? I hate chief. I hate chief. Easy cheat. But wear the headdress or what? You know what I think we should start? What? Calling the ladies boss. Hey, boss. Hey, boss. I love boss. I like boss. But no girl's ever been called boss. How you doing, boss? You know, it's like, that's such a dude. You know what? I call my bosses boss. Yeah, so do I. I call Garrett and Rick boss. I do, too. My dad. El Jefe in Spanish is boss, in case you didn't know, Mike. Right. Of course me. I'm the Mexican on the show, all right? And that's what my dad calls my mom all the time, El Jefe. She's the boss. That's huge. Every time I write any directive to all of us, Pepper always writes back and goes, you're the boss. You're the boss. You're the boss. You're the boss. You're the boss. Just a couple more real quick. Don't stand at the server station. It's annoying. You're in the way. Get out of the scene. And be a regular. So if they see you a lot, they'll know you're cool. Let's see. M1L, who you want?
Mikey. You got it. Hang on the line. M1 Bill, who do you want? Switch. You know that. This is weird so far. M1 SoCal? Lauren? Who's that? SoCal? Who's Lauren? Lauren is the blonde standing across from you. Pepper O'Brien. Pepper O'Brien. You want Pep. SoCal used to always pick me, and now he's switched because I haven't done him well. You haven't done it. M1 Rob, you got Sienna. Lucky man. All right. Lucky man. Hang on. All right. I get to play. You can leave those on. Buddy. Oh, wait a minute. Are we sharing a mic? Yeah. I can go over there. I can share with Wizzy. No. I can share with Wizzy. No. I'll share with you. No. I can share with Sienna. Yeah, because I won't know it, really. All right. Host of the show. Let me lower the mic down. Whatever. Did you just hear Sienna? Push it down a little bit. She goes, I have to lower the mic down. I was thinking of the same thing. Whatever.
I can stand on an apple crate. Here, let me boost you up. I love you, Mikey. Put your foot in here, dude. Does anybody have a baby beyond me? Mikey, I really... Now that we're sharing a mic, I feel like we're a team. Yeah. So I really hope you win. You know, when we got hired, when we got hired here, general manager of the radio station, Rick Jackson, goes, so you really operate your own controls, huh? And I go, yeah. Like... As opposed to what? He goes, I've just always known talk show hosts that have a board operator. And I was like, weird. Like, I'm just trying to imagine that. Like, I feel so out of control right now. I know. You look weird on the other side of the table. It feels weird being here in your spot. I know. I'm like, whoa, okay. Jay's the boss now. Hey, hey, hey. Let's get some hands going here. You're the boss. You're the boss. Let's do this. Are we ready? We've got to explain how this works. The way that it works is to name that tune. And so he's going to play. We call it name that tune, but it could be name that movie theme. Name that. What is it today? These are movie quotes. Movie quotes. So we just say our name if we know it. And then Jay will call our name out. And we cannot just yell it out. We have to wait till we're calling. Woods. Here we go. Here we go. You guys up for a talking party? Woods. Animal House.
Mikey. We already had an Animal House one that Woods got right. Are you keeping the score? And Pepper, yeah. I've seen Animal House. I didn't know. All right. Here we go. Okay, here it is. I'm going to make him an offer. It's Woods. Thank you. It's the Godfather. Because Mikey can't remember his name. Weird. This is the first time he's had to do this. Just remember, not a. Mikey. So he got it, right? He got it. A little slow on the button. Here we go. Take your sticking paws off me, you damn dirty ape. Mikey. Planet of the Apes. Yeah. Santa's like your cheerleading squad. That's right. That's right. Go, Mike. Anybody but me, they want to see win. Anybody but me. All right, here we go. Woods. Mikey. Hello. Call it. Yeah, Woods. Yeah, E.T. I thought it was obvious. You got it. I'm a quarter second in delay. My brain works a quarter second in delay. Me too. All right, here we go. Dirty Harry. Dude, what are these movies? I don't think I was alive for any of these days. He wants his correct sound effect. Besides E.T., I've never seen any of these. These are very famous. Let's get a girl in here picking up. Whenever you're ready. Here we go. I'll have one cheese. When Harry met Sally. Why? Why? Why? Choke-slam him.
You didn't know that one either, Pepper? No, never seen it. My rejoiner clip is if it has Meg Ryan in it, I'm out. Oh, really? I've never seen that either. That's weird. Okay, here we go. Ryanist. Woods. Mikey. Field of Drake. Dang it! This is not cool, man. This is called a slave ad. This is a slave ad. One quarter of a second. I'm one quarter of a second off. I'm going to sit. It's all that vodka. Here we go. It's a sit. Rowing my brain cells. Here it is. Kids? You want answers? Mikey. A few good men. Dang it! You just said you were going to sit it out, you jerk! Here we go. Mikey! Silence of the Lambs. There you go. He's on the board. Yes. He's got two. Put it on the board. It's 145-2. Let's do this, Mike. Rally. That's right, Mike. Yes, Mike. Let's do this. Rally. Go, Mikey. Go, Mikey. Has anybody seen Pepper over here? Come on, Pepper. You can do it, girl. Come on, Pepper. She's lost her pep. Come on, Pepper. There's no Pepper. It doesn't matter. Even if I get the next two right, it's over. Come on, kid.
You're never giving up on anything. I'm waiting for some cartoons. Where are they? Ready? Here we go. Mikey. Lord of the Rings. Yes. Nerd. Yes, Mike. Greetings. Greetings. You're catching up. Come on, Pepper. You didn't see that movie either? No, it's just a lot of yelling happening. Chase this chicken around. Let's do this. Too early for this yelling. Here we go. Here we go. Mikey. Young Frankenstein. Wow. Nicely handled. Yes. Come on, Pep. You got it. Do it, Pepper. She's done. Pepper took her headphones off, threw her hands in the air. How many more we got? I haven't seen that one either. How many more we got, Jay? You should get to the movies. How many more we got? One more. One more. That's still fun. Here we go. Ready? Yeah. Why male models? Woods. Zoolander.
I love how it was completely void of air. M1 Bill. There we go. Sienna. M1 Bill killed it. Way to go, Woods. Give you a dirt nap, dude. You did. Real good. Yeah, you threw it down. But you know what? I want to do this again. Okay. I'll pick the movies next time. Yes. Yeah, we need a girl to help. Name that documentary. Okay. But Pepper. That's not very empowering to female species. No kidding. No, it's not about the sex. It's about the generation. Well, I'm the same age as you are almost. You're not. You're five years older. Five years. It's a big difference. Not really. It comes to movies. Mikey's five years older than me. What generation do you do best at? Stuff I was alive to see. All right. You were alive for all those. No, I wasn't. Which one? Yeah, give me the age range. Which one weren't you alive for? I don't know what they even were, so I can't tell you. You were alive for all of them? No. Yes. Young Frankenstein? Yes. What's that? It's the 70s. It's brilliant. Gene Wilder. I wasn't alive in the 70s. You weren't? No. You were born in the 80s? Yes. No. Was that 70s or was that early 80s? No way. See, I'm not the only 80s baby. This is from Young Frankenstein. What's the matter with you people? I was joking. Yeah. Don't you know a joke when you hear one? So it was this.
Let me out. Let me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. That's what Pep was saying during that game. Pepper, you would love Young Things. It's so good. I'm sure I would. Hysterical. My dad broke up with a girl because she didn't like that movie. Really? I'm sure if I saw it, I'd like it. He took her on a date and she goes, that was like the worst movie I've ever seen. He's like, yeah, this isn't going to work out. See you later. Of course it isn't. You know. If you go on a date with a girl. And there's a movie that you fundamentally find hysterical and she don't like it. What are you going to do with that the rest of your life? Nothing. You bail. Yeah. You have to. That doesn't go reverse effect like girls. Because guys never like our movies. Oh, yeah. We don't like glitter, dude. We're not going to watch glitter. Okay. Really? You're going to be Mariah Carey's glitter? This does not apply because this is a movie that's universally popular. But I said to our friend Kimbra, who's getting married in September. I said, I've never seen Dumb and Dumber. And she said, I could never date a person that has not seen Dumb and Dumber. You agree with that, right? Yeah. That's ridiculous. Yeah, see, I disagree with Sienna because it applies to girls, too. Yeah, male and female, right? Hey, did we tell M1 Bill that he's the winner and give him his prize? No, we can, though. Let's do it. Let's let Bill understand that Woodsy just won him some sunglasses. That a boy. How do you feel, Bill? Do you feel alive?
I feel so alive. I had a kid. Hang on the line. Pepper O'Brien, give me a range of years. What do you mean? Well, movie-wise, that would be good where you could slay it. Probably 80s till now. I know there were some in there. So starting from 1980 onward. Yeah. Let's do it. Yeah, you're right. Dirty Harry's a pretty old movie, but that's just such a standard clip. I think I'll do better if I got 80s and on. Oh, me too. We'll do that and we'll level the playing field a little bit. But the thing was, once I heard those first older ones, I was out. Because the rest of the game didn't have all older movies, but I was just... She checked out. I checked out, yeah. Next one is 80s and on. You'll all get slayed. But don't you think, well, here's my thing, and I don't care or whatever. I never know him anyway, so it's all good. But, like, when you're 15, you probably really start remembering stuff. So that would mean that the movies would need to be 2,000 and what we said. Yeah, for me, that's why, well, no, that's why I'm like, I'm just never going to get them. I remember movies from a kid. Me too, dude. Movies that played a big part in the Woods family. E.T. was like.
He even said, eat. Yeah, he goes, eat. But I was already so like, oh, my God, I don't even know this. But I was like, check it out. I think Woods can read the board or something. I can't read the board. I'm a quarter second behind him. I'm an idiot. I'm an idiot when it comes to remembering movie lines. Ask my wife. Oh, yeah, I can tell. Ask my wife and my sister-in-law. They're like, oh, my God, could we have married two bigger dorks? That's all we do. Well, I do the same thing, but you're just quicker. He's really fast. I enjoy it. That's the first time I got to play. I want to do it again. I could play that all day long. I love it. I love it. Let's see. Real weird stories over the weekend. A couple of really weird things. And I'm just going to run through them as headlines. If you didn't know, the president of Poland was in a plane accident. Obviously died this weekend. A really strange story. And then also... President Obama broke protocol and left the White House without the press, which I guess is really different. That doesn't happen very often. And then fill us in, Sienna, on what's going on with the West Virginia coal miners. Well, over the weekend, they found the four missing bodies that they were looking for. They did? Yeah. And they were not alive. So there were 29 people dead from the explosion at the coal mine in West Virginia last week. It's crazy because they had to go in.
the crew to find these guys. They had to go in like three or four different times, and apparently they passed the bodies. It was right in the very front, but because there was so much smoke and you couldn't see anything, they couldn't find them until yesterday. Pep, did you have something or no? No. Here's President Obama on what we should do about this situation. I've asked my Secretary of Labor as well as the head of Mine Safety and Health Administration to give me a preliminary report next week. On what went wrong. Who knew that there was a person appointed with that title? I had no idea. Why it went wrong so badly. All right. I feel bad that something happens. The president's got to answer to it no matter what. No matter what. Do you guys remember who Dixie Carter is? Of course. Designing Women. Designing Women is correct. Jesse said different strokes. This is, in case you didn't know, this is a clip of Dixie Carter. Look, Miss Langford, please call me Gabby. No, I won't call you Gabby. You haven't taken the time to learn any of our names. Well, that's not so. I know Anthony. That's right you do. First, you kept us waiting for 35 minutes. And then, when you decided you were bored enough to come downstairs... Oh, I don't like television. I don't like television. This is why. That's 80s television. I know. I listen to it and I just go...
Who talks like that? Sounds a little, yeah, see? Even now, though, I watch sitcoms. I go, who talks like this? The only thing you've acted the least bit interested in is seducing our delivery man. Seducing? Well, if that's what you would think I was doing, then obviously you haven't got the artistic sensibility required to work with me. Oh, for goodness sake. That is Dixie Carter. She died on Saturday at the age of 70. That's so sad. Yeah. A good southern woman. That's right. Dixie Carter. I like her name. Never watched any of that. I'm so surprised by that. I've never seen Falcon Crest. I've never seen Dynasty. I've never seen any of those 80s shows. Never seen Dallas. Not one episode. Sorry, it's not Knight Rider, pal. Never saw Knight Rider. Never saw one episode. Not Knight Court. Never saw one episode of these shows. I'm telling you, all I watched when I was a kid was scary stuff.
I just watched, like, scary stuff. You see the new Hail Raider. Right. So good. No, no, I didn't see the scary movies. I saw stuff on HBO. Mm-hmm. And I watched Twilight Zone, and I watched Night Gallery. Right, right. Did you watch Tales from the Crypt? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Me too. Scared me. Hello, my pretty. Yeah. So scared. That just sent shivers down. Mine too. Scared me so bad that I couldn't stop watching it when I was a kid. I'd love to watch it right before bed and then be scared to even go up the stairs. Like an idiot. Yeah, exactly. A couple of earthquakes shook San Diego over the weekend. Weird. I didn't feel it. When were they? Because I swore I felt one yesterday afternoon. I'm feeling them 15 times a day now. I thought I felt one yesterday afternoon, too, but there was one yesterday morning at 9.42 a.m. On Sunday morning, it was a 4.6 that struck in Baja. And also on Saturday, there was a 4.5 that hit along the Mexican border at 2.12 a.m. That was Saturday morning. Really? Yeah. Didn't feel a thing. I know. It was felt as far as to Orange County. My brother said that...
That Clash of the Titans is dumb. Really? Oh. He says it looks great. He says special effects are great. Oh, really? I was hoping it was just going to be a knockout. He says it's dumb. The monster looks freaky. I know. All the teeth. Come on, Woods. It's not kind of fun to watch. He didn't go see Avatar, so he can't look at him. You don't like to look at the coolness of it? No. Really? There's one I was thinking about, and I thought, Woods, he would like this if he gave it a chance. You say no. Jurassic Park? I love Jurassic Park. That's based on real stuff. Dinosaurs were real. It's not in the fantasy world. But taking DNA out of sap. Could happen. You of all people should know that because you eat sap. You should know that you can extract DNA from sap. You have sap on your fingertips right now. You have a sap mustache. You have a sap mustache. Got sap. Let's see. Also wanted to tell you that Conan O'Brien is going to be, he wants to do a show, but he can't. So he's going to take his act on the road. So brilliant. And he's coming here, too. Yeah. He's my cousin, you know. You always got the last name O'Brien. Not. Oh, boy. Wow. Yeah, wow. Wow, exclamation point. Wow. What's the deal? Where is he going? He starts off tonight. It kicks off in Oregon.
And this tour is virtually sold out. That's where Edward, what's his name? They'll be front row. Edward from Twilight. Edward and Bella, they'll be front row tonight. Okay, you guys. Edward and Bella in the front row. They're in Washington. Bella, let's get the hell out of here. They're not in Oregon, they're in Washington. Let's go photocopy our skin. Right? Sorry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, unbelievable. It's just a joke. That's all. I'm going to take it real serious. Twilight, people. Oh, yeah. You guys are going to make fun. Beaker. It's Justin Bieber. Oh, wow. That's a dude. He's young. One time. What's he saying? Me plus you. I like the beat. Me plus you one time. That's a new one for Power 106. A new one for Justin Bieber here.
That's kind of a Michael Jackson at a young age voice. He was found on YouTube like L.O.B. Just like L.O.B. Oh, oh, oh, check this out. Okay, a couple things. First of all, I got... The 10 worst ways to break up with someone, which I want to know that. But then we got Woods of Wisdom, where Woodsy's going to answer your questions that you send to us from MikeyShow.com. In a little bit, we're going to be doing Settle a Bet. Here's something I really want to know. Sienna brought in the new cheeseburger-flavored Doritos. Oh, you guys are going to flip out. Can't wait. Flip out. We'll do it next. We'll do it next. And turn it on. Be a part of the Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. This is a Mikey Show. More coming up on FM 94.9. This is the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar. All right, this coming Thursday night at the Cow Spa, go see The Big Pink. They're playing with A Place to Bury Strangers. Next Monday, the 19th, Sia will be at House of Blues.
Taylor Hawkins and the Coattail Riders play the Cow Spa. Rogue Wave plays the Belly Up April 27th. And Broken Bells play Humphreys on May 18th. Tickets for that show on sale now. So there you have it. Get out there and see some shows. The FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar can be heard four times daily. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar at FM949SD.com. Show your hair thicker, stronger, longer, and faster. Guaranteed with Ovation Cell Therapy. Ovation is awesome. My hairdresser says my hair has grown an inch and a half in 30 days. That's never happened before. No more extensions for me. Ovation really works. With just a simple cream rinse application, your hair can be healthy again. Log on to OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout for a special discount. That's OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout for real results. Guaranteed. Ovation works. Ovation customers tell their stories best. I love Ovation. Hyperthyroidism caused me to lose a third of my long blonde hair. With Ovation, my hair is growing twice as fast.
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Papa John's. Everyone likes Kick-Ass. This Friday. Hurry on! Critics are saying one movie more than lives up to its name. Kick-Ass. Kick-Ass. Kick-Ass. It's stylish, intense, and brutally funny. That's right. We're superheroes. Love us. Thelma Adams from Us Weekly says it's ridiculously fun. Four stars. Did you watch the new superhero? What's so special about that guy? Red Mist has a better body. I think Kick-Ass is cuter. Kick-Ass. So important, huh? Rated R. No one under 17 in middle without parent or guardian. In theaters Friday. Make sure your low fares stay low to St. Louis with no bag fees from Southwest Airlines. Grab your bag. It's on nonstop from San Diego to St. Louis starting May 9th. Book your nonstop flights to St. Louis now at Southwest.com. Weight and size limits apply. This report is brought to you by Big O Tires. It's the Big O Tires one-price sale by any size Tempest Touring Tire, just $64.99 each. The one-price sale for the Big O Tire store nearest you call 1-800-NEW-TIRE. Five southbound ramp to the 163 northbound, an accident. You're going to find that left lane blocked as a result. Also on the 79 at Chihuahua Valley Road, an overturned vehicle, a car on its side, a tow truck's on the scene. Also looking at Vista and Escondido Avenue, the ramp to the 78. We've got an accident.
sedan and a pickup truck. They are blocking that on-ramp. This report is brought to you by Jack in the Box. Come to Jack in the Box to try Jack's new fries. They're crispy, golden, delicious, and salted just right. And Jack's giving them away free during Free Friday on Friday, April 16th. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego, the Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Steve Perry on stage with that jacket with shoulder pads and tails. Do you remember this video? Of course. At an abandoned warehouse. With no instruments. No instruments. Remember the keyboard player? Yeah. Playing the fake keyboard? Playing the fake keyboard. Nothing in front of him. Yep. I think, were they playing air guitar and stuff? I think so. No instruments. I saw Journey come to San Diego a couple years ago, but not with Steve Perry.
Oh, yeah, Steve Perry hadn't been the band. You're the Asian singer, right? Yeah, he's a Filipino guy. But he does a dead-on ringer. He's a second dude. They had another dude before him that they actually recorded an album with. Really? And it sounded like a new Steve Perry Journey album. This guy was so much... His name was Steve, too, I think. Yeah, it was. Yeah, Steve Mary. Mm-hmm. No. Steve Mary instead of Steve Perry. And he had the long hair. And he would even do like the, like he'd be doing Faithfully, and he'd even do the thing where he'd be like. That's such a good band. I'll say the Journey concert that I went to in San Diego was one of the best shows I've ever been to. Oh, yeah, me too. It was just such a pump your fist, like. I never saw Journey with Steve Perry, but even with the sound alike, the karaoke guy, it was still one of the best shows I've ever seen in my life. Really? No, I wasn't. Sure. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Blah. We'll leave that one there. My name is Mike. I'm the host of the program. And the kid sitting across from me is Steve Woods. But we just call him Woods. And say it, Mike. Pepper O'Brien is that girl sitting right there. And Sienna is our news girl. She's sitting. She's wearing the same T-shirt that Woodsy's wearing today. Great minds think alike, my friends. That's right. Seals.
Jay is our producer. Ten worst ways to break up with somebody. By email and email text. A post-it. Can I do my bit? Go ahead. What's your bit? You know my bit. What is it? I'll check it off if I've done it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. On vacation, numero uno. Check. You've broken up with somebody while you're on vacation? Yep. Or while they're on vacation? I've broken up with a girl while we were on vacation. Oh! How do you do that? You're like, this is over. And then you've got to fly home with them the next day. Why would you do that? Mike, didn't you do that? Yes. In San Francisco? That was weird. Well, I was, yes. Didn't Rebecca have to turn around and then you missed your flight or other way around? Yes. Yeah. Yes. Another one of the worst. In a text message like Facebook, there's another one. People do that? By just changing your status? Change your status. It's complicated. It's complicated. Is it? It's complicated. Really? The feature shouldn't even be on there. Well, you know what it's complicated means? It's complicated means we can't stop breaking up with each other. We're not together. We're not together. It's complicated means she wants probably to mess around with other guys. Or vice versa. Or vice versa. He wants to mess around with other girls. More than likely. And he... Plebeian. It's a little bitter.
Men have more testosterone, which means they need to satisfy the urge. It's in our DNA. Get me the hell out of here. Eject. Around the family. Nice little family gathering. Get out. We're done. How about right before the holiday? Bad guy. It's awful. Tony Romo broke up with Jessica Simpson on her birthday. Good move. So mean. At a wedding, imagine you're there to see people who love each other unite. Not to mention stealing the thunder of the people at the wedding. No, they wouldn't even. At my wedding, one of my bridesmaids, I guess, got in a huge fight with her boyfriend. Really? I had no idea. I wonder why. Because they're like, when are you going to pop the question, you idiot? Yeah, it was actually lower than Matt. Not that I know from experience. What's your problem, man? See what they're doing that's normal. Why aren't you... You're afraid. I'm not afraid. And why don't you lay off... You lay off yourself. You know what?
I wanted to leave anyway. Leave. No one's stopping you. You have a ring on your finger, remember? You drove us in my car. You drove us in my car. Well, yeah, I still have the keys. Then why don't you just mellow out a little? Why don't you drive off a cliff? Why don't you drive me crazy more? I do. Oh, my gosh. I really hope couples don't talk like that to each other. Why don't you drive me over the wall? Why don't you drive your pants down the wall? Why don't you? Why don't you drive your face? Why don't you drive your ex-girlfriend? Oh, why don't you drive bringing stuff up from the past, man? Why don't you text her again? Why don't you stalk my cell phone? Why don't you go out to lunch with your ex? Why don't you ask me if that's where I'm going if I'm only going to the gym? Why don't you wear a pink tie? Oh, wait, you are. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Why don't you leave me alone? Why don't you live alone? Why don't you guys break up? Seriously, just end it. You guys hate each other. This is awful. She won. Ten minutes later. I love you so much. I love you. Why do we always fight anyway? Let's go slay in that bathroom. Slay. Let's go slay.
Another one of the worst places to break up with someone is at your special place. Do you have a restaurant that you guys go together? A spot on the beach? Your special place? Don't do it in your special place. Maybe like a waterfall in Tahoe? Maybe something like that? No, a bench where you sit at the park every Sunday. I proposed at a waterfall in Tahoe. Well, you were gonna. Did you? You were gonna. What? Me? Wait, you were going to and you didn't? This guy's only known this story 48 hours and he's already worked it into a joke. I've been waiting. You know that he will. Unbelievable. I can't say anything around this. I know it. A kid gets roasted plenty on this show. It's true. So I did. What's the big deal? There's no big deal. I'm just confused. You had the ring? Yeah. But you didn't pop the question? I couldn't find the waterfall. Let's move on. Let's move on. You couldn't find the waterfall. And he's driving around. He's like texting Jay. Dude, I'm in Tahoe. There's supposed to be a waterfall somewhere around here. You guys know Mikey. If Mikey can't find his pen, he's a lunatic. So imagine him driving around going, oh my God, where's this freaking waterfall? Where is this waterfall? He couldn't find it. Did you make a special trip to Tahoe just to propose and go to that waterfall? No, we made a trip to Tahoe. I knew I was going to propose while we were on the trip.
My friend Nick, his parents owned a cabin. We were staying with him. And I said, I want to propose to Rebecca. Do you know of a cool place? He goes, dude, hands down. On the lake, there's this waterfall. It's amazing. I've been there. You didn't scout it out before him? No. I asked him. I said, well, I got to do it tomorrow. He says, yeah. I said, how do I get there? He goes, you cannot miss it. You can't miss it. Guess who missed it? Little Boots missed it. I don't trust when anyone says... You don't trust when anybody says what? When everyone says you can't miss it, I'm like, I'm going to miss it. And then I'm going to be really mad that I'm missing it. And I was going to say, chances of me missing it? 100. 100. I missed it. And? So I had to pull over at a scenic... Overlook? Yeah. He's like, this will work. Were you like, anyway, just marry me. I got to say it. I gotta say it while we're here. Say it, say it, say it. Spill it, Wood. He's like, what's his bread right now? He's hurting himself laughing so hard. I'm going crazy. Can we tell him how you proposed? Shut up. Can we tell him what you said? You have to. Did you write it on the palm of her hand? He walks up behind her. Creep. Between you. He puts his arms around her and I think, didn't she say, or no, Mikey said something about.
This sure is a beautiful view. And she's like, yes, it really is. And he goes, would you share this view with me for the rest of your life? Oh, my gosh, no. You did? Does that mean you're moving to Tahoe? Let me just say, I thought it was sweet, and then I looked at Mikey's eyes, bulging out of his head, and that's why I started laughing. You're covering me now. It was so sweet. See, you would have called me cheesy for doing that. Well, it was cheesy, yeah. But what proposal isn't cheesy in hindsight? But you don't live in Tahoe for the rest of your life. Woodsy's was not cheesy. Woodsy went like this. Listen, why don't we fight all this time for? When did we get married? You did? That's how it was? Absolutely. No ring? We weren't even dating when we got engaged.
What? We weren't dating. They were broken up. Oh. Yeah. So you were drunk. Did you have a ring? No. She got it next weekend. You know that. You know that. Drunk, though? Maybe. Maybe. So the next morning, did you have to be like, did we just do it? That's right. How else would I do it? I really want to hear Jay's. Jay probably has a really good, like... Not so much. We pretty much were... already living together and we just decided uh you know hey let's do this because we already had the ring i mean we had the ring i mean right off the bat we were living together for three months and we decided let's go get the ring and then we hit it for another three years and then you know it was like at that point we knew we were going to be together forever we just decided we wanted to start having babies there was no proposal but i guess it was weird it was just like we both knew you know it was like I didn't have to get down on one knee. It was just like, hey, this is a done deal. We both want this. It's awesome. We didn't even have to talk about it. We just knew. It was weird. Did any of you get down on one knee? No, I didn't. I didn't. You did, Mike? Yeah. I did later when we got the ring. I ran home for lunch and was like, all right, let's do the bit. Give me your hand. Will you marry me? Oh, my gosh. I'm sweet. What are the other ones? One of the other worst ways to break up with someone is in bed.
Maybe wait until you have some clothes on. Maybe wait until then. You get one more taste and then you leave. Weirdo. I was right. Look at Pepper. Look at Pepper is so filthied out by that. So filthied out. She needs a shower. It could just as easy be a girl breaking up with her when he's in the nude. She gets one more taste and then leaves. She's out. Girls are like that. Creepers. Ew. Lou, lick it pepper. Lick it pepper. I'm just saying. It's an important thing, you know? Okay. Let me out. Let me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. Three more worst ways to break up with someone on Valentine's Day is number three. That's got to be number one. Thanks a lot, Heather Doobie. I swear, on Valentine's Day, there's so many proposals and there's so many breakups. Yeah, there is. I believe that. It's nuts. Thanks a lot. The second worst way to break up with someone is by doing nothing. Just the fade away. That's the kids. That's the prize move. My prize move. That's awful. It's great. It worked. And the worst way is by cheating. Yeah. All time worst. All time. You guys ready to do a little Woods of Wisdom? Sure. Do we have an open for Woods of Wisdom? Yes, it's right there. It says Woods of Wisdom. What do we do? We do. It's a new one.
Do? This is the debut. Let's see. I haven't approved this yet, by the way. Well, you know what? Someone else has. Well, I haven't. I am blind. I'm going to come in there, then. Oh, I found it. Yay! Yeah, good start. What is this song? You know that song. Footless Stat was singing to you at your wedding. What? Love it. That's great. He's doling out advice for free. It's greatness. Yeah, just go to MikeyShow.com. You'll see a link for Woods of Wisdom. You write in. You ask a question of the kid. And don't ask me why the Yankees suck because that's not very funny. Why are you getting some clown? Some clown. Can you tell me why the Yankees suck? 27 rings, chief. I think that's pretty funny. Feast.
You ready? It's a legitimate question. This is legit. Feast, 27 rings. There's nothing wrong with that. Feast. This first one is from M1Jeezy. He starts out by saying, Buenos dias, guys, probably because I'm on the show and, you know, he just wants to make sure that your Mexican-ness is what defines you. So I met this girl two weeks ago, fell in love with her almost instantly, a la Mikey and Woods. We hung out with a group of friends this past Friday. Over dinner, we hit it off instantly. That night we texted back and forth until almost four in the morning. We're going out to dinner next Friday as well. Problem is, this girl is, the problem is, the problem with this girl is she's moving April 15th to Seattle. Oh, and did I mention she has a boyfriend? What I want to know is. Oh, no, no, no. If I should tell her how I feel. Someone's easy. Woodsy? Yes, you should. You absolutely should, dude, because you'll kick yourself.
The rest of your life if you don't. This could be the one. Doesn't she know how you feel if you're texting until 4? Imagine texting someone until 4 a.m. You're sitting there waiting. Are they going to write back? Can I go to sleep now? Are they going to write back? I don't know. I mean, you've got to tell her. You've got to tell her the way you feel. You'll kick yourself the rest of your... This could be it, man. This could be Mrs. M1 Jeezy. Pepper O'Brien. I have to agree with Woods. That's weird. Yeah. Although, if I were M1 Jeezy, I wouldn't have gotten involved with anyone in the first place. I had a... A boyfriend, girlfriend. Maybe you didn't know. Wait, have they hooked up? Does it say? They just text and hung out? It doesn't say. Because, I mean, there are certain exceptions, yes, but I think if you get into a relationship when there's, like, even sneaking around, cheating weird things, it's like, man, they're going to do that to you. Of course. You know what? Like, don't sign up for what's going to happen to you. That's a generalization. That's not true. I know that there are exceptions. That's what I started off saying because people are going to say, wah, wah, wah. But.
I mean, that's not a good way to get into a relationship. Exactly. I mean, if you live in Perfectville, that's fine. But there are instances. I mean, listen, Jay is a self-admitted dirtbag before he met his wife. Yeah, but he wasn't cheating on her. Jay, you ever cheat on a girl? Was he cheating on her with Kim? Yes. No, no, I wasn't cheating. No, no. Aren't you? No, he broke up with her. I had to break up with her. Kim would have nothing to do with me before I broke up with this girl. You know why? But you would have, wouldn't you have? You know why? She wouldn't because that would mean that you were a bad dude. Exactly. Right. Okay. Now, if that's not true, then it means this. If it isn't true, it means, yeah, I'm going to go out with them anyway because I'll be different. I'll be the one that changes them. Oh, I liked one guy so much. Like, oh, I thought like, oh, we just. hit it off perfectly and he had a girlfriend i never met her they weren't that serious and he tried to do things with me and it turned you off right and i was like no like yeah it totally did and i didn't do anything with him and i am so so glad i did it's character yeah it's like who wants to be your seconds your sloppy seconds you
I mean, you are. That's the girlfriend, and you're going to be like this person on the side. How does that not speak to their character? If somebody's stealing from you, and you're like, hey, you want to be my roommate? And they steal something from you? I mean, you want that to feel good. I can't believe this guy stole from me. I met him at a thieves convention. We were at this thieves convention, and I thought he was the coolest cat I'd ever met. He seems so honest. He seems so cool. This is a totally different thing. I mean, this is Jeezy, who's met somebody he really, really, really likes. There's two problems. One is she's moving. Two is she has a boyfriend. Funny thing is, the boyfriend almost seems secondary to the moving. In that email, it does. That doesn't mean it is. Probably to her as well. To him, it does. To him, it is. But I think it's kooky. I think you have to tell her how you feel, dude. And then at least you can go away knowing you did everything you could. So now that you know, and he could say to her, now that you know that, you're still going to keep this boyfriend? Like, if she reciprocates the feelings, she can't. Also continue to have a boyfriend. Yeah, right. Maybe she'll say to him, no, I'm going to break up with him. Am I literally sitting in a room with four people that have never cheated on anyone? No, I've never. I have so many questions. I have. I have. But if I met a girl and I was like cheating on my person with them and they ended up with me, what are they like thinking of? What do they think I'm going to do? Like maybe they go.
I'm going to be the one to change him. No, I don't think it's a character thing, man. I think it's an individual thing. All right. I think there's people that, you know, people like Jay is self-admitted. He went 180 degrees when he met Kim. From the way he was. I was all over the place. But I would break up with girls right and left, though. It didn't mean anything. What about, see, to me, it's like the tiger thing. We were talking this morning about the tiger thing, and we were going, and the guy called in and he said, what does Elon expect? Well, she might expect something if the way that she met him was because they were messing around. Was after this story or after everything broke with Tiger. If she got in a relationship after that, she may be a little suspicious. What about this one? What do you tell him? I would say run, don't walk. I would say run, don't walk. Unless you see that she's changed. If you see the changes and you really know that she's changed, go for it. Because now you know she's different. Does this guy want to be sitting around in 20 years going, I really felt something special about that person, and I never told her the way I felt? That's the bottom line. No. I would do that if she didn't have a boyfriend. Tell her anyway. You've already been hanging out. It's not your bit, dude. It's her bit. It's her problem. I mean, if he's already writing this, he feels like he needs to tell her. So he might as well tell her. But my advice would be...
to not get involved with someone like that in the first place, but it sounds like he's already in too deep. What if the boyfriend's going to Seattle too? Like, that's not just a boyfriend. If they're moving in together. Yeah, or even if she said she dumped the boyfriend, but yet he was still moving there. I need details. I need more details. Hey, Woodsy, what would you say to this dude if he calls you a year from now and he goes, dude, found out she never broke up with the dude, just found out about him. She's been seeing him the whole time. Would you say, what would you say? Say, sorry, dude. Live and learn. You wouldn't say, how did you not see that coming? No, dude, no, I wouldn't. There were no red flags? No, I mean, yeah, there's red flags with every single person. If we're really going to think that we're going to walk around and think, oh, I met this girl, we like her. And I know I'm going to be her first. And I know she's probably never cheated. I know she's probably never gone crazy. Yeah, dude, there's a place like that. It's called Fantasyland. It doesn't exist. No, not everybody cheats. I've never cheated. Fine. Have you ever gone crazy on a dude? Yeah. Is that a red flag? That's not what we're talking about. We're talking about red flags. How about this? Everybody used car? Everybody used car? Yeah. If you buy the used car, you look at it, it looks good. You're like, hey, looks good to me. You drive it. Buyer beware. You drive it. Turns out it's got a bad transmission. Okay. All right. Let's say you see this beautiful car. It's used.
take it for a test drive, and it's going clang, clang, clang, clang, clang, clang, clang, clang, as you test drive it. Right. You go, what is that noise? Guy goes, it's a transmission. Don't worry about it. Yeah. It's a great example because if you're seeing... You go, okay, cool, I'll take it. If you're seeing the red flags when you first meet someone, that's a sign. Normally, you don't see any red flags, which is why you continue dating, and then you find out that, yeah, there's some issues, but no one's perfect. Well, how about this? How about sometimes you see some red flags, but you're... They're not so obvious that their hood's flying up. Yeah. With smoke billowing out of the engine. All I'm saying, dude, is that if you dig past anybody's top layer, you're going to get some dirt. Without a doubt. But this chick's moving and has a boyfriend. You still got to tell her how you feel. You're saying if you dig, but if it's right there on the surface, plain. Plain as day. Yeah, plain as day. Then what else lies beneath? Some requires digging. Some is right there for you to look at. You know what? I've fallen for people that had significant others before. No question. How about this one from M1 Big Colby? Woodsy, I've never really been a cologne guy, but lately I've been wanting to try it out. Is there a universal good scent for dudes? I don't want to seem like I'm wearing perfume. Gotcha. It's got to be a universal chick approved man smell. I'll tell you, man, I got an old standard.
What is it? It's called John Varvatos. Oh, yeah. And it's the greatest cologne known for men. It's like springy, summery, but it's not overpowering. You put it in and it kind of soaks in and it smells delightful. Let me tell you about John Varvatos. He's the man. I got a niece that is 25 years old. Yeah. And she bought, for Christmas, she bought me John Varvatos and she goes, just trust me. Trust me. The black and the... And I go, really? She goes, this is the greatest smelling cologne that I've ever smelled. And now, for me, it was... You know how everybody's got their thing? I like the clean ones. So for me, I like stuff that smells like soap. But I can tell you this. This is lady approved. Bring it in if you're not going to use it. Because I'll use the crap out of it. Do you want to know the story? You'll think this is hysterical. John Varvatos. Go get it. I, I, okay. I went to, I took a trip somewhere and I took the John Varvatos with me. Oh, I hope she's not listening online. And my little, uh, my little dop kit, tiny little dop kit, my tiny little shave kit was jam packed. And I'm like, I don't ever wear this anyway. So I left it at the hotel. You did it. I did. Cause it, and then my bag went. You are a turd. I know it, dude. You would have taken it.
And I'd have given it to you. I would have left other stuff. I would have taken the Johnny V. I didn't leave my Johnny V there. Dude, women like the Johnny V. I'm going to have to check this out because Todd just ran out of clone and I'm thinking I'm going to do one. John Barbados. John Barbados is good. Look at both girls are writing it down. John Mayer, Half My Heart. Taylor Swift. His voice to me is music to my ears. Like a unicorn? I wouldn't put him in the unicorn category. He's a unicorn guitar player. He's a great guitar player. But his voice is soothing to my eardrums. Absolutely. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Hey, Rumi. Did you see my note? Order Cox High Speed Internet. Oh, right. The note I forgot. No worries. Just switch us to Cox High Speed Internet like you promised. Then ditch your boyfriend. Sure. Wait, what? Isn't it time to move on to better things? Like Cox's online speeds, the fastest in San Diego, with downloads up to 33 times faster than the phone company's basic DSL.
And a boyfriend who actually wears shirts with sleeves. I'm just saying, you could settle for just any internet service. Or you could get Cox High Speed Internet with free Power Boost, faster speeds to download music and stream videos, a free McAfee security suite. That does sound pretty good. So, time to move on to better things? Deal. I'll order Cox High Speed Internet. Cox High Speed Internet. Starting at just $14.99 a month for 12 months when you order the Cox Ultimate Bundle. Visit cox.com to order. Cox, your friend in the digital age. Limited time offer. Excludes equipment rental and other fees. Actual speeds vary. Other restrictions apply. We begin in a world of consumer banking needs, but travel to another dimension. A dimension of secure, fast and easy ways to make deposits through ATMs. Of no longer having to fill out deposit slips or use envelopes. You've just crossed over into... The Chase Zone. Did you just put that check directly into the ATM? Yep. No deposit slips, no envelopes? No need. Whoa, you just stuck a bunch of 20s in there. What is wrong with you? Me? I'm not the one feeding the ATM like a hungry Sasquatch. Sasquatch? Really? I don't know.
It's Chase deposit-friendly ATMs. Deposit checks and bills. And it shows you a picture of the checks on the screen and on your receipt. Wow, ATM machines that practically read your mind. My bank doesn't have that. Chase does. Chase now has ATMs that let you securely deposit up to 30 checks and 50 bills at a time with hardly any effort. Just slide them in. They take care of the rest. That's what happens when you step into the Chase Zone. Deposits are subject to the fund's availability policy. See a banker for details. JPMorgan Chase Bank N.A. Member FDIC. Your United States 2010 Census form may be on its way in the mail or may have arrived at your home along with your Uncle Fred. Good to see you. Cousin Ann. Hey, we're here. Her husband Matt. Hey. The twins. This is awesome. And their cat Fluffy. all who may be moving in with you because of situations beyond their control. So it's important when you fill out your 2010 census that everyone living in your household is counted, including family members or friends who have no other place to stay, as well as babies and foster children. The 2010 census provides benefits that really hit home, such as funding for job training and health care. So make sure everyone living in your home is included on your 2010 census form.
Together, we can move forward when everyone living with you is counted and you nail it back. United States 2010 Census. It's in our hands. Paid for by U.S. Census Bureau. For more information, visit 2010census.gov. That's 2010census.gov. 60 days. A lot can happen in 60 days. You can plant some tomatoes and watch them bloom. Make a new friend. Add that final touch of genius to your screenplay. And now... 60 days is how much time you have to get the Lexus of your dreams at the 60 to 0 certified pre-owned sales event. Through June 1st, every Lexus model comes with 1.9% APR financing and attractive lease rates, which means the one you want is the one on sale. Hurry to the Lexus 60 to 0 certified pre-owned sales event because a lot can happen in 60 days. Like someone else getting the Lexus you want first. See your Lexus dealer. Carlsbad, El Cajon, Escondido, or Kearney Mesa. Or visit LexusCPO.com. 36 monthly payments of $28.60 per thousand financed. Call 1-800-USA-LEXUS for important APR program limitations and offer details. Only a limited number of customers will qualify. No down payment required if qualified. Offer ends June 1, 2010. If you're struggling in any way to pay your mortgage, the federal government has just designated $75 billion for loan modifications. As an American taxpayer, you are entitled to this relief money.
But don't wait. This federal money will go quickly, so act now. Some companies charge $3,000, $4,000, even $5,000 for a loan modification that you don't have to pay. Call the VS Modification Center at 888-384-3022. We'll show you how to work directly with your lenders to get your loan modification completed and save you thousands of dollars. Just call 888-384-3022 for a free no-obligation assessment. You will receive a printout stating your eligibility, complete with your proposed payment and details of your new rate and term. Don't risk your biggest asset. If you foresee any financial difficulties ahead, or if you are already facing default, call the VS Modification Center at 888-384-3022 today. That's 888-384-3022. Right now, head to a Jack-in-the-Box location near you and try Jack's new fries. They're crispy, golden, delicious, and salted just right. Jack's giving them away free during Free Friday on Friday, April 16th at participating restaurants.
This report is brought to you by your San Diego International Airport. San Diego, your airport's about to take off the green build. Ten new gates, a dual-level roadway, lots more dining and shopping at Terminal 2. Sign up for construction alerts at sand.org. On the 5 southbound before the 9.05, an accident over on the right shoulder. Solo collision. A woman was hit in the head. An ambulance responding with a tow truck as well. Also, the 94 eastbound before Broadway. An accident over on the right shoulder. An SUV hit the guardrail. He's going the wrong way. A tow truck. also on its way. This report is brought to you by Jack in the Box. Come to Jack in the Box to try Jack's new fries. They're crispy, golden, delicious, and salted just right. Jack's giving them away free during Free Friday on Friday, April 16th. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Put down a 20. Now back to the Mikey Show. With Mikey. I am chubby. Woods. I can put down a 20 pack of chicken nuggets. No problem. Lauren. I have a very keen sense of smell. Sienna. Todd and I went downtown LA to Prospect. And Jay. I love that sappy music. On FM 94.9. It's a good one, Sienna. Sienna picks the music today. Hey, Charles. His voice is so beautiful. That is. Georgia on my mind. Oh, I love this song. Georgia. How has Martin Scorsese not used this in the movie? I know. Georgia. That'd be great, right? Have you heard Willie do this one? The whole.
Who? Willie Nelson. Yeah, yeah. So good. It's great. Love them both. Does it just mellow you out? Oh, yeah. It mellows me out, man. Dave. Good morning. It's Dave Matthews. I'm mellow as can be. It ain't from Ray Childs either, I'll tell you that. No, Dave. In fact, I think I know why, but you don't have to go into that. You know why. Dave Matthews sleeps in our studio. Good morning. So weird. Morning, Pep. Morning. How are you? Oh, I'm good. I need to roll a joint letter. Can I borrow your shirt? All right. Thank you, Dave. Yeah, because it's made out of hemp. Correct. Sure. Her shirt's made out of rolling paper. Correct. It's the same thing that you make rolling papers out of. Dave Matthews comes in the studio wearing a white robe.
He hasn't shaved. It's not really white anymore. No, it's kind of gray. It's gray. Shades of gray. Disgusting. David Gray. Not David Gray. Great. Smells like shades of B.O. Yeah, man. Yes, it is. It's my natural oil. Weird. You should get deodorant, Dave. Matthews. I use a rock. I know it. A wet rock. Ew. Dave, you're going to go to the... Padre opening day? Yeah, they don't know it yet, but I'm singing the take me out to the ball game. Nobody actually asked me, but I'm going to be there. So if you see me, come by and say hello. How are you going to get down on the field? I'll figure it out. He's Dave Matthews. I'm Dave Matthews, man. You know, the Padres are bad, though, man. The last time I saw a team like this, I think Tom Hanks was coaching them. Hey, hey, hey. Wow. It's no crying in baseball. This isn't a girls team. It's no crying in baseball. You think Ogilvy or Mr. Buttermaker are available? Maybe they make that right. That's messed up, dude. That's the fat kid from Bad News Bears. Hey, man, are you related to Fernando Valenzuela, Mikey? Of course you are. That's a stupid question. I'm not related to Fernando Valenzuela. You guys could be twins. I'm not. You have twins. I'm not. You could be twins. I'm not. Well, anyway, I'm going to be... And we're not twins because he's 84 years old, too. Boy, that guy could pitch his ass off. He could. He was great. But just because he's Mexican doesn't mean that we're, quote, unquote, twins. Are you sure? Yes. You're identical.
It's quite short. It's identical. Thank you. Dave. Nobody photoshopped Mikey's face on the Fernando Valencia. Shut it up. Shut it up, Dave. Dave, why do you have to use our bits? I've been living here too long. I've been hanging out with Garrett too long. Bottle of Jack just fell out of your robe. That's right. Onto the floor. Get a cocktail here real quick. No, you don't need to drink that. I wouldn't do that, Dave. It's very early in the morning. You know, you're guzzling. You're guzzling. That was insane. You're guzzling. Don't guzzle. Okay, weird. What are you? That's not a bong. You checking the bouquet? He's smoking. Dave. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're a complete idiot. Now I'm mellow. You ready? I'm going to do this today at Petco Park. Take me out to the ball. Take me out with the crowd. Buy me some peanuts and crackers. What are you adding? I don't care. Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave. Root, root for the Padres. If they don't win, it's a shame. David. Hello. Are you hearing what I'm hearing? Yeah, it sounds like Adam Sandler. Why are you singing like Adam Sandler? I've been hanging out in here a while. I want to kind of be part of the show and do my own imitation. I thought I would try to do a...
Pepper does Donald Duck and Woods does some things and Sienna does something. Mikey does stuff. Jay does stuff. I got nothing. I got no big role. You're not on the show. You're not on the show. If they don't do this, it's a shame. Because it's one, two, three strikes you're out at the old ball. Pretty good. You got all the right words. I had the words in front of me. Dave, you're messed up. Is there a yoga studio in here now? Like a wild animal. He really is. That was Dave Matthews. He's so pleasant to have around. He's like writing his comedy bits for the show now. Did you hear he's doing one-liners? Yeah, just little one-liners. Last time I saw a mouth like that, I had a hook in it. All right, I want to try the cheeseburger Doritos. I've been dying all morning. Yesterday I was in the grocery store. Come on in, Jay. I was in the grocery store yesterday. I saw these cheeseburger flavored Doritos and I was like, I don't know. In fact, I actually thought to myself, I'll let somebody else try that. And then let me know. Yeah, maybe they tell me how they are. Well, you know my man picked him up at the grocery store and he was real excited about it. Have they discontinued the late night, because it's called the late night cheeseburger is what it's called. Have they discontinued the late night tacos?
Flavored Doritos? No, they have everything still. Hold on, Jay. Let me just tell you. You each are going to have one. Lauren, you don't eat beef, but this is a chip, so you can have it. You won't do it? Look at that face. She looks disgusted. Woods has been trying to take this bag from me all morning, and I have not let him. Dave Matthews reached a scraggly hand up from beyond the board. So I just want you guys... I'm going to hand you each a chip. Just give me the freaking chip. No. No. Don't bite it yet. That's. Don't bite it yet, Mike. Okay. Okay. Now you're going to close your eyes and you're going to take a bite and just imagine a cheeseburger. Smells like feet. Imagine a cheeseburger, you guys. It is the exact taste of a cheeseburger. You can taste ketchup. You can taste pickles. Keep going. It's a cheeseburger. Not only is it a cheeseburger. Oh, my gosh. Not only is it a cheeseburger, it's specifically a Burger King like Whopper. Yeah, with pickles. Dude, it tastes like with pickles, onion, and ketchup. That is amazing. So good. I'm getting those today. Have more. That's so weird. Isn't that amazing? I didn't expect that. Why didn't you bring the whole bag? That's about all that's left. I have to say, why didn't you bring a whole bag? That's so weird.
I'm here, Jay. And you're being inappropriate. You guys have as many as you want. You can taste ketchup. You can taste everything. The people at Doritos have made it right. How do they do that? Pepper. One. One. No chance. It's a turkey. It's a turkey burger. No chance. That's what she meant. You taste the ketchup, the onions, the pickles. You don't taste beef. It's all right. I'm all set. I'll take your word for it. Mikey tried kombucha. Oh, yeah. Let's go. You owe him one. Come on. You owe him one. Please. She is out. It's a chip. Why won't you have it? I'd have to read the ingredients. You ate brownies? Yeah, but I'd have to read the ingredients, so it's on there. There's Lysosol 3 in here. You eat nacho cheese Doritos? There is a ton of riboflavin in these. This is richened with riboflavin. It's better for me to just imagine it. You guys are describing it well. Just have one kernel. No, you don't understand. It is a cheeseburger. A turkey burger. But I don't eat a cheeseburger. It's a turkey burger. All the cool kids are doing it. I'm not cool. But I don't eat a cheeseburger. It'll make you feel good. Yeah, I don't eat a cheeseburger. Lauren, it'll make you feel good. I can't believe you saw these in the store, Mike, and you almost got them. And then here I have the chips. I actually thought I got to let somebody try that before I go for it. I got your back. Dude, that tastes like a Whopper. It tastes just like a Whopper.
It's the most unusual. Is this weird? And Jay, you agree too. Oh, that's fantastic. I don't even eat meat anymore, but that was fantastic. What an unusual sensation. It's a vegetarian's dream. Get a cheeseburger and a chip. Look how grossed out Pepper is. She's just filthified. It might as well be a turd. Yeah, we're talking one chip. She's filthified. Grossed out. Hey, look at this dog poop I picked up this weekend. Everybody feast on this. You want more, Mike? I do. You guys can have it. You know that. I have more at home. Like I needed more reasons to eat Doritos. I know, me too. I'm not kidding. Doritos, they know their stuff. The Frito-Lay company, they don't mess around. They can make some good concoction. Have you had the buffalo wings? Ranch? Buffalo ranch. It's insane. You know that. You know that. Of course I have. It even has that smoky flavor of the barbecue. It's amazing. It's weird. I've never experienced anything like it. I'm not sure if I really enjoy it or I'm kind of creeped out by how it creates that in my mouth. It's kind of weird. I feel like I just ate a Whopper. I taste a pickle. I taste, I mean, the ketchup is really strong. Pickle, onion, ketchup, bun. I taste bun. I taste the smoke. Maybe a little sesame seed on it. Yeah, I taste the smoke from the fire. Lauren is checked out. I taste the smoke from the fire. This is disgusting. Where am I? And I taste, mmm.
Wow, that is so... You know what it reminds me of? What? At the end of Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory when they taste that... Everlasting Gobstalker? Yeah, and it's got, like, all these flavors of different stuff in it. Yeah. All right. The only problem, though? Instant heartburn. Oh, get out. Instant. What is an instant for you? Instant. I know. Yeah, dude, water is instant heartburn. Exactly. Creme brulee is nice. You think you have a gallon of Tums. Fair enough. Jay, you can have more of these chips. Speaking of food, KFC. They are unveiling a very unusual item on their menu today. Get ready for this. What is it? It's called the Double Down Sandwich, and it uses two chicken fillets as buns. Oh, my God. In between. I mean, really? Really? Is this real life? Yeah. Burger King's going to release a hamburger with two burger patties as buns. And they're going to put a burger in between. I'm in. I'm in. What do I sign? Two chicken fillets as buns. Inside, there's bacon. Of course. Monterey Jack. Pepper cheese. Pepper Jack cheeses. What about a doctor? Is a doctor inside of it? And a zesty sauce in between. That's repugnant. I would eat it. Is a cardiologist in there? I would try it. That's repugnant. Why is it? Because I don't want to put my hands on some greasy chicken for a bun. Guess how many calories it has. Four. Five thousand. No, just guess honestly. Five thousand.
Not even close. 1,000. Not even close. 300. It has, I'm going to guess, it has 300 calories. 540 calories. Is that bad? Is that bad? I mean, it's bad, but it's like not that bad considering. I mean, exactly what Sienna said, not bad considering. How many calories do you do today? Seven? Me? Yeah. I don't know. Nine. I don't count them. I think that an adult woman should have about probably 1,500 calories a day. It's a good guess. Yeah. Yeah. A Double Down has, let's see. A Double Down. It's called the Double Down. If you want grilled chicken, you can get the grilled chicken version. That has 460 calories. It's about the same as a Big Mac and a large order of fries, I would say. No. Yeah. Big Mac's more, isn't it? Nutrition, yeah. Yeah. I feast on Big Macs. It says it's about on par with a Big Mac and or a large order of fries. A large order of fries has that many? Oh, that's depressing. I think I'll have a Big Mac and a large order of fries. 100%. I'm not getting a double down. I know. There is something strange about the bun being two pieces of chicken fried. How about the name? It's for the Atkins dieters. The double down. You always double down 11, baby. That's right. You know that. That's right. I would try it. You know what that... Not always. Well, not in this case. Yeah. Swing. Swing. You know that. I feel like I'll get pimples instantly.
Oh, eating a greasy chicken sandwich and wiping your brow? Disgusting. If someone brought them in right now, you would all eat them except for Lauren. For sure. Lauren would try it with a knife and a fork. She wouldn't try it. She wouldn't even eat a Dorito. You wouldn't even do it with a knife and a fork? I've never had KFC. Really? It's so good. It's so good. Have you seen this body? That's good. That's what we're going to do for you. Colonel approved. Yeah, Colonel approved. This? Colonel approved. He lifts up his shirt every day. Hey, do I have time for Settle a Bet? Are we good? Yeah. Yeah? Great. Can we do it? Can we do it? I even have a new open. Woo! I like that. A lot of debuts today. We got a lot of debuts. We got so much new stuff today. Let's see. Is it up here, Jay? Yeah. Every time we go through this. Where is it? I don't know. It's Monday. Well, it's just took a cup out of the trash to use. Nobody will give me one. I gave you one earlier. Everybody's hoarding their cups today. What's this? It's filled with water. Well, this will be water and this will be coffee. Oh, I forgot. You're the recycler. You're not going to give me that. Jay, are you putting it up for me? I guess I am because I'm not finding it. It ain't here. I can sing it. No, because we got it. And I want to debut it right now for the masses. Okay. It's a good one. We got to get people on the phone. 570-1949. What's the prize today?
Same thing. Sunglasses? Same thing. Anarchy or angel. Depends on if it's a guy or a girl. They're really cute sunglasses, too. Or tough. If you're a dude, anarchy. Tough. And if you're a chick, it's angel. Little angel. Call us right now. 570-1949. We're going to play Settle a Bet. Here's the way that it works. You're going to hear regular folks being asked questions. You're going to wager on whether or not they're going to get them right. You've got to pick a horse. So you're either going to pick myself, Sienna, or Woods, and one person's going to get to play for themselves. Sweet. So give us a call. I think it's a better idea for us to, because it's going to take us some time. So let's come back and do it. We'll line you up, 570-194-9, or you can play for yourself. In this episode of Mossy Nissan's Dare to Compare, the reliable Nissan Altima takes on challenger Toyota Camry in a race to the finish. The catch, they each get just one gallon of gas. And here comes the stylish Nissan Altima 2.5 S cruising in for the win. Hey, congratulations, Team Altima. Oh, yeah, thanks, man. It was easy. Our Altima gets better city MPG than that Camry. Yeah, and this car is...
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Due to the economic crisis, a program approved by the United States government now may eliminate 100% of your medical bills and credit card debt entirely. This program is now available to the general public through the Chapter 7 Federal Bankruptcy Act and here to offer Americans a fresh start during these hard economic times. We have one goal in mind with this program, and that is to allow Americans to keep their homes, cars, and personal property while eliminating 100% of your debts for good. For more information and to see if you qualify for this government-approved program, call the American Bankruptcy Hotline. today, 800-304-0661. Over 1.5 million Americans are expected to take advantage of this opportunity this year alone. While the economy is getting worse and worse, there is no better time than now to file bankruptcy on your debts and walk away from 100% of it for good through this program. For more information, call America's Bankruptcy Hotline now. 800-304-0661. 800-304-0661. Again, that's 800-304-0661. At Papa John's, better pizza's their motto. And Papa John's wants everyone to enjoy a better deal on a better pizza right now.
So for a limited time, Papa John's is offering a large pizza with your choice of toppings for only $10. You heard right. You'll get a delicious piping hot large Papa John's pizza with your choice of all your favorite toppings for only $10 at any of the 29 conveniently located San Diego County Papa John's. Don't wait. Try one now for only $10. Better ingredients. Better pizza. That's Papa John's. Welcome to the REI Member Rewards event. Can I help you? Well, I'm looking for a spacious, lightweight. REI Half Dome tent with DAC featherlight poles. Yeah. But I'm also looking for a windproof, stretchable. Ultra light nylon hiking jacket. Yes. And a pair of. REI Sahara pants. Oh, you're good. We know what you need because we know what you love. Come to the REI Member Rewards event. Members get 20% off one full price item. Exclusions apply. Not a member? It's the perfect time to join. REI. Find out. Hurry into the REI Member Rewards. This is only a test.
By StandForLess.com, the average family of four consumes more than 2,000 beverage containers a year. Let's see how many we can keep out of the landfills by recycling. Learn how at StandForLess.com. The eastbound ramp to the 163 northbound. There's an accident there. That right lane's blocked. It's an SUV and a car stuck together. Also, Friars Road westbound ramp to the 163. Again, the on-ramps block. And it looks like the 5 northbound, you're going to have a delay at the 56. Somebody lost a ladder. It's in between the number 1 and 2 lanes. This report also brought to you by... Jack in the Box. Come to Jack in the Box and try Jack's new fries. They're crispy, golden, delicious, and salted just right. Jack's giving them away free during Free Friday on Friday, April 16th. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego, Lincoln Financial Media Station, the new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Ugly Kid Joe actually did a cover of Cats in the Cradle. I had no idea. Oh, yeah. It's good. Sienna picked it. It's really good. If you want to do Settle a Bet, we need you to call 570-1949 and you're going to be picking. No, we got them. No? They're gone? Mm-hmm. And you can't pick Lauren. Got to pick myself or Woodsy or Sienna. Give the guy that had Lauren Sienna. Okay. You let some moron answer the phone.
M1 A-Town. How's it going, Mikey? How you doing, dude? I'm doing good. You got Sienna hanging the line, okay? All right. M1. He's like, okay, cool. I have to. Excuse me. At this game, I have won both times. Sienna's really good. So he can. Feast. You can take this job and shove it. I don't even want him. All right? M1 Nathan. I'm upset. Nathan. She's pregnant. Don't get her mad. I know. Come on, jerks. Nathaniel. Nathaniel? Hello. Hi, Nathan. Hi, you little nativity. There you are, you rascal. You got Woodsy, you know that. What does little nativity mean? Did you see that note? Yeah, it says Woods, you know that. Because guess who was screening the calls? Hey, hang on, okay, Nathan? Nathan! What's going on with Nathan? He's on Dave Matthews time. Yeah. Are you hearing this in delay? Are you in Holland? He's on Mars, it sounds like. Who's going on? He's actually got a phone right now. It's a tin can with a string at the end of it. And so it takes 10 minutes to get to him. And he's in Yuma, so it travels real slow. Hello. Okay. All right. Great. All right.
Nathan, hang on the line. He's got me. There he is. M1, Heather? Yes? You can either pick me or you can play for yourself. Oh, yeah. Sorry. I'm going to put my faith in you, my friend. Okay. You got me. Hang on the line. I forgot about that. And finally, we have somebody that is going to be playing for themselves. I have something in my eye. I have something in my eye. I always feel like I have something. Oh, I do have something in my eye. Is it an eyeball? Yes. We have a Nathan and we have M1 Nat as well. Hi, Nat. Hello. This is not going well. Mine doesn't even like me. Woods is good to hear us and yours. Yours is good. Heather is good. Nat. Mikey has something in his eye. I'm a nat in my eye. He's derailed. I'm trying so hard not to check out. Nathan, talk to me. Nat, what's up? Oh, there you are. You came to play or what? Hi. Yeah, he came to play. Yep, you're going to play for yourself. Are you ready? Yeah. You're going to play with yourself, pal. Not with himself. For himself. Take it easy, Woodsy. My body. I'm exhausted right now. I'm exhausted. My day just left my body. I'm upset. My day just left. What? He's playing with himself.
Hey. What? He is. He's playing for himself. I'm going home. Jay is staring at me. See you guys later. All right, here's how we do it, Nate. We're going to start over here with Sienna, then we're going to move to Woodsy, and then you, and then me, okay? Let's do this. All right, sounds good. And you're going to wager on whether or not this person will get this question correct. There's a pair of sunglasses on the line if you win. Okay. And here we go. And I am here with... Angelica. Okay. How old are you? I am 19. Are you a student? Yes. Do you live in San Diego? Yes, I do. Are you born and raised in San Diego? No, I am not. I'm born and raised in LA. In LA. In where? LA. LA. LA? And how long have you lived here for? A year and a half. And what are some hobbies that you have? I dance hula and I build robots. Oh.
She dances hula and builds robots? Yes. Who doesn't? Oh, that's cool. The game is called Settle a Bet. So I have one friend that says with the American flag that the first stripe on the American flag is a red stripe. Another friend says that the first stripe is a white stripe. So I just need you to settle a bet for me. Is it a red stripe or is it a white stripe? The correct answer. Should I give the correct answer? No, let's... Well, wait. Everybody get to wager? I think it's red. I think it's white. It's blue. I have no idea. Not an option. Okay, so the question is whether or not she will get it correct. Sienna? Now I feel like it's red, but my initial guess was white. I'm going to say she guessed white, too. You have to tell us if she's right or wrong. Yeah, I do. You have to. Correct answer is red. So, yeah, I'm going to guess she said white. So she gets it wrong. Yeah, because my initial was white. Yeah, I think that just kind of muddles the water. Woodsy? Sienna says no. I say she gets it right. So she says it's red. I'm keeping score, Woodsy. Oh, you got it. Okay, good. Give the kid a breather. What do you think, Nathan? I say she gets it right. Atta boy. I say she gets it right. And the reason I say that is because I think that we just, our brains go red, white, and blue. So we'll go, she says red. Red. Good job. Good job, little gal.
She got it right. She did. She did. Here is the next person's question. And I am here with? Sherry. And Sherry, are you from San Diego? No. And how old are you? I'm 49. What do you do for her? She's smart. Yep. You always say that. You do. If I hear that somebody's 49, I almost immediately go, they got it. Genius. I'm a registered nurse. Oh, no. She's very smart. She's smart. Did you hear what I said? I said wonderful. You did? Easy, Mikey. Wonderful. My old in this is creeping off. I didn't even know I said it. I played the audio. I was editing it. I'm like, what did I just say? You said wonderful. I almost took it out because I was so... It's wonderful. Rebecca and I went to dinner on Saturday night. Waitress came over and said, how's dinner? I said, wonderful. She walked away and Rebecca goes, really? Is it wonderful? She goes, is it terrific? She gave me awards. Yeah, she did. I have a game here. It's called Settle a Bet. The question is... I have one friend that says that Mary Lou Retton, when she got her perfect 10 at the Olympics, do you remember that? Yes. One friend said it was at the 88 Olympics. Another friend said it was the 84 Olympics. So can you settle a bet for me? Was it 84 or was it 88? Pepper, that is a tough question. It's a dynamite question. It's a great question. The correct answer is the 84 Olympics. Yep. And our question is...
Will this 49-year-old RN get it correct? Woodsy? Yes. Nathan? Yes. I say yes, she will. Sienna? I'll go the opposite and say no. Here's her answer. Oh! Did you get Nathan's answer? Yeah. Dang it. Dang it. Sienna's correct. Sienna was right. Yep. So we're all tied up right now. All tied. Here's the next person. I'm Lauren, and I'm here with... Dan. And Dan, are you from San Diego? No. Where are you from? Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Are you a Steelers fan? Absolutely. Yeah, you think they're going to take it this year? I hope so. And what are you doing here in San Diego? Visiting. Just visiting? How long? Okay, so do you consider yourself a fairly patriotic person? I'd like to be. We're playing a game, it's called Settle a Bet. I have one friend that says the Statue of Liberty holds this torch in her left hand.
Another one says that she holds it in her right hand. So I need you to settle a bet for me. Which is it? She hold the torch in her left hand or in her right hand? What a great question. No clue. I think I would have guessed she held it in her left and I would have been wrong. We're looking at a poster, a Clash poster in the studio. And it's got Statue of Liberty on it. And she holds it in her right hand. Pennsylvania know that she holds it in her right. I am... I'm picking second. Nathan, what do you think? What do you think, right or left? Well, you know it's... That would be correct. Yeah, I say she guesses correctly. I say she guesses incorrectly. Sienna? I say she gets it. It's a man. It's a he. He gets it. Sorry. He said she and then I said she. This is all confused. Woodsy? I say... I say he gets it right. Can we go down the line again? Nathan says he gets it right. Mikey's the only one that says no. Right. Okay. We're left. My guess is right. Got it. Good job. Good job. You got it right? Yeah. So. Woodsy, Nathan, and I all won. Yep. Wow. Look at you guys. You've never won. I've never won this game. I will never be picked again. No. For the record.
And I don't think I should be. That was the worst showing I've ever had in the history of playing a game. Now you've got one out of three. Does anybody else have hamburger aftertaste? Me, big time. I put snuff in my mouth. Have hamburger Dorito aftertaste. Hang on the line, Nathan. Hang on the line, buddy. Does everybody win? Everybody win. Except Nathaniel. I did a terrible job. I think I would know that. Yesterday, Phil Mickelson won the Masters. Man, do I have an appreciation for watching golf after having gone out and hit a ball with some clubs. Bro, you were into it, man. Yeah, I really was. The guy was texting me, like, updates and highlights and all kinds of fun stuff. It was cool. I enjoyed it. Woodsy had a really great day yesterday, too. Oh, boy. He makes me nervous. Why? Oh, you know.
Kids got a lot of passion and emotion. That's a competitor. What do you want? Here's the deal. When you have somebody that's extraordinarily artistic, like Woodsy, very talented guy, comedians, they usually have, you know, kind of a darker side, you know? And so when Woodsy calls me and he says very casually that he had a baseball game and he very casually goes, Oh, yeah, and, you know, I got upset at the game. I go, oh, no. And you did. You got upset at the game. I had a couple meltdowns yesterday. What happened? Well, first of all, I want to say that the Brew Crew, my team, we are on the board with a win of a resounding victory, 13-4. I had one of the best days I've had in a while at the plate and had an RBI double, which was sweet, had a sack fly, which was knocked at another run. My guys.
Our pitcher, Lucas, pitched a complete game, which was just filthy. But I came up to bat, man on second and third, and I'm like, oh, dude, I'm going to pick up a couple more RBIs. So I swing at this nasty curveball, and I foul it off, and it rolls foul. And the catcher picks it up and throws down to first, and basically the umpire calls me out, even though the ball was sitting in foul territory. So I turn around, I go, dude, that's a foul ball. And then, you know what he does? Eject, eject, eject. He gets kind of in my face and starts yelling at me that it was fair. And I said, dude, I go, what game are you watching? And he didn't like that one bit. And so I, like an idiot, fired my bat. Oh, boy. Over to the fence. Oh, boy. Threw the helmet. Walked in the dugout. Was furious because he basically took the bat out of my hand. It was a foul ball. So, all right, I go back into the field and we start playing. It's the kind of thing you would ground your kid for, by the way. What does it mean to fire your bat? He threw his bat. I threw my bat into the thing, and then the helmet off into the deal. You didn't get in trouble by that? Oh, yeah. He was mad. He was mad mad. He didn't throw me out, but he very well had every right to. Okay. So then I'm playing first base, and our shortstop fields a grounder, and he slings it over, and I have to move off the base and jump up for it.
Well, this guy is running down the line and screams. Not under his breath. Screams. Get out of the effing base bat! Screams. I mean, as loud as can be. Oh, my goodness. Well, I catch the ball, hit the ground, and turn, and just go right for him. Right in his face. And I gave him one back, and the umps separated us. My player was holding me back. They were holding him back. The whole thing. You're crazy. You're crazy. You're crazy. Crazy. When he calls me and he says these things, I go, are we going to have people calling us tomorrow and saying, what's up with your boy freaking out? Dude, here's the thing. Like, we're all a bunch of has-beens out there. Speak for yourself, boys. I mean, we're like, hey, but here's the deal. You don't, if you want to play and have a good time and laugh. Go play softball. This is hardball. This is hardball, dude. This is serious stuff. Is it? Yeah, it is. And you don't play for fun. Isn't it a baseball game? You play to win. Isn't it a baseball game? Do you play to win? Why play something if you're not going to win? It's supposed to be fun. It is fun. You know what's fun? Winning. Write that down. Isn't it a baseball game? Winning is fun. It's supposed to be fun. Was this a peco? Was this a peco?
No. Were they wagering on it at Vegas? No. We have uniforms and everything. We're like a real team. Were you making money? No, I pay actually to play. Okay. All right. Ask Todd about it. You are something else. Ask Todd about it. You are something else. Because Todd, he'll back me up and so will Matt. Anybody that's ever played competitive sports, you don't play. Like if we went out today and we're throwing the football around and five other people walked up and said, let's get a game five on five. Dude, I would be playing to beat the crap out of that team. Period. You are something else. Why? I'm a dude. That's what we do. You're just playing a game. Well, there was a couple of people, like Rizzo came to watch. Yeah. He was like, dude, I thought you were going to get tossed. For sure. Because I flipped. I'm shocked that you did not get tossed. I flipped on the umpire. I did. And this is the second time I've had a little run. Was your wife there? Yeah, she was there and mortified. Yeah, I was just going to say. Mortified. Women get mortified by their dudes when they do that. Bro. I'm fire. Would you, Sienna? Of course. It's the only time during the week. I know Pepper gets proud of that. She really likes when a man flips out like that. Well, it's the only time of the week that I can go run around with just the boys, right? And go out and play the game that I love more than anything in the world. And I can dip snuff. For sure. And I can curse and have a great... I think the only time we would like it is if...
They were sticking up for us or something like that and flipping out. And then it's like, yeah. Of course. Not when they're doing it. Hey, I'll tell you what. You think it's abnormal. It's not abnormal. M1s call in. It is not abnormal. My behavior on the field is not. Neither is robbery, but that doesn't make it okay. Robbery is abnormal. This is not abnormal. It is abnormal. That's abnormal. Yes. Road rage. Not abnormal. Not abnormal. No. Okay. I need to jot these down because I want to keep a list of what's normal and abnormal. Road rage, normal. Yes. Flipping out at your paid to play baseball game. Normal. 100% normal. It's normal. Please somebody call in and take my back. It is normal. You're right. Mike, when was the last time you played a team sport? I was four. Okay. There you go. I'm crazy for feeling. Especially guys. Mikey came to watch me pitch and you got into it. Got into it? Yeah, you were fired up. Oh, oh, oh. I thought you meant I got into it with somebody. No. Like, you were fired up. Like, go get him. Like, you were like, go get him, Woodsy. I'm an adult. Yeah, Mikey doesn't raise his voice. He was cheering. I cheered for him. You were fired up, though. Well, that's different from getting in an umpire's face and throwing my baseball bat. I had to make up with Alice when I got home. Who's Alice? My bat. Oh, my gosh. Oh, she's my pride and joy. I had to talk to her.
Love on her a little bit because I threw her very, very hard into the wooden fence. And when I got home, I took her out of my bag and I said, I'm so sorry, Alice. Yeah, her name's Alice. Why? Because she's an angel. Okay. And I've been hitting lights out with this thing. Brewers, call in. I know you're listening. Oh, we got a guy that was there. Bring him up. M1 Grizz. Are you there, Joe? Yeah. M1 Joe Grizz. Hey, Woodsy. I was there. The star struck fat kid in the black shirt. That a boy? Yeah, yeah. When I smoked that thing, didn't I? Look at Woodsy. Joe, that freaking double in front of my wife and stuff, I felt so good when I hit it. Because it was the first run of the game. His head's getting bigger. Pepper's blowing his head up. He stood up. Of course. Of course. What the heck?
just happened. I'd have been terrified. Let me tell you, when the spring breaks in the kid's head, run for the hills. Run for the hills. Why do you think that I say in here, why do you think I go eject, eject, eject? I was reading a Facebook post and somebody wrote something sideways and I wrote, I just wrote one word, eject. I just wrote eject. When they called me the hermaphrodite transvestite. Yes, I just said eject. Who doesn't want to hear that? By the way, ball was foul. Yeah. Exactly. No, no. They're getting them all worked up. After yelling at you, the umpire started walking back, smiling with teeth missing out of his mouth. It was touching white. When I saw it, what can I do? It wasn't touching white. No, you know it. It was a foul ball. Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness. Man. Crazy. Thanks for coming, dude. I'm crazy for this. You're crazy. You're crazy. You're crazy. I like you. I'm not crazy, dude. I just got a lot of fun. I play to win. I play to win. I play hard. M1. M1 able. Hey, what's going on? Not too much. I got to agree with Wood, man. He played to win. That's right. And my opinion, people who say play to have fun maybe weren't that good as well. Oh. Well, you can put me in that category. And, you know, listen, I would play to win for sure.
But he freaked out. Why would you play if you were playing to lose? I mean, everybody plays to win, but some of us don't flip out. Competitive nature takes over the man. It does. You got to win and you just go nuts and you lose. Hey, man, if I strike out, here's the difference. You ready? If I strike out, I don't throw my bat or my helmet. I'm mad at myself. But if the umpire takes a bat out of my hands when I got a chance to knock in two runs on a BS call, I'm going to say something to him. Here's him. Steve Woods, you suck. Yeah. GD, you suck. Can I just tell you? Every call is calling in to support Woods. Freak out. Weird. Great. M1 Brittany. Hey, how's it going, guys? Good morning. Good morning. I was just calling in to say I play on a softball, co-ed softball team. And whether it's baseball or softball, when you get into the game, it's all about winning. You're into it. Yeah, we played against the Hooters co-ed team, and I'm not a little girl. Take them down. They started running their mouth. It was all about who did pop up or crap, and who was going to beat the crap out of who. You're right, Woods. I played on a competitive dodgeball team. Yeah, I played on a competitive kickball team. Hey, look at us during Name That Freaking Tune. We're jumping around, we're screaming at each other. It's you play to win the game. Played on a competitive Dungeons & Dragons team.
So what are we questioning right now? Mikey, when you're surfing the internet, don't you want to be the best internet surfer that you can be? Yeah, and if anybody ever said to me, hey. I gotcha. You passed up your megabytes. You're over your megabyte limit. You're going to throw your laptop. I'm going to throw my laptop. I'm going to get after it. I'm going to throw Henrietta. My laptop, Henrietta. I'm going to flip out. My baby. Henrietta. That's right. Really, that's the name that just popped into your head? Of all the choices. Like, we know you just thought of it. Of all the choices, that's what I decided on. Now you need to continue to call it Henrietta from now on. All right. Jamie, are you there? Yeah. Do you do what Woods does? I got kicked out of my high school powder puff game because I eye-gouged somebody. Yes! Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. They had to cancel it the next year because I got too feisty. They didn't have power to put my school for like two years until the people decided that it was okay. I graduated and all that stuff. Can I just tell you, and I've said this before, we are all just grown up little kids. I'm a man child. I have no qualms about it. That's a deal. We are all grown up little kids. It's gold. Yeah. All of us.
But when you get to be an adult, you got to try to rein it in. Bro, I just, I love it. I love it so much. I don't think I will ever be able to stop playing. I love just sitting in the dugout with the guys BSing and getting out, running out in the field, fielding grounders. It's the most, it's the best part of my week besides being here with you guys. It's like, I drive to those games like, oh my God, I can't wait to get on the field. And I love my team. They're the best dudes in the world. It's so much fun. I'm driving back from Coachella early to play ball Sunday. Are you really? Yes. I have to be there. It's not this weekend, is it? It's this weekend. It's coming weekend. I think our game's at 1.30, and I'm driving back because I'm playing ball Sunday. Wow. Period. How about this one? This is... I don't know. It's not playing. No, it's not playing. Oh, I know why. Because I didn't hit the button. Oh, yes. You know, here down in Worcester. Oh, yeah. That is straight up Martin Scorsese. Is he with Robert De Niro smoking in the bar? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is the scene in, it's two of his movies, Casino. He does this in Casino when, he does it in Casino when Sharon Stone's walking down the hallway, messed up. You're thinking of Layla. Yes. Oh, am I? Yep.
And he also does it in The Departed. The Departed. Until I tell you what a 19-year-old girl in Florida did in the back of a cop car. People are going to like this. It's a good time, you know what I mean? Call 570-1949 or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Do you remember when you used Dial-Up to access the Internet? Remember how slow that was? Thankfully, things have changed, and now you're doing more and more on the Internet. Facebook and Twitter, YouTube, Deuce, the Huffington Post. You just couldn't do all of this with Dial-Up. And you know how some levels of DSL from the phone company aren't that much faster than Dial-Up? Here's the deal. If you want super fast Internet without all the lag you get with DSL, switch to Earthlink from Time Warner Cable.
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Success is measured by service. Navy Federal Credit Union. We serve where you serve. Navyfederal.org. After reading, after discussing, after searching, you realize that at this school you don't memorize the answers to questions, you ask them. The Rady School of Management at UC San Diego. Innovators under construction. Learn more at rady.ucsd.edu. Nothing. Every opportunity in front of you. The world's forward-thinking companies behind you. The Pacific Ocean beside you. Nothing standing between you. The Rady School of Management at UC San Diego. Learn more at rady.ucsd.edu. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. When I used to be on the radio and my name was Michael Shannon. And I wore suspenders. Woods. I buy sticker price for... Lauren. P.S. I'm going to get a wheatgrass shot. Zienna. That's why I keep the antibacterial hand gel in my purse at all times. And Jay. I love that sappy movie. On FM 94.9. Opening day, kids. Woo! We're playing the Braves. Yes. Are the Braves any good? Yes. They got a kid named Jason Hayward. I want you to remember that name. Okay. He's got probably more raw ability than any player I've seen in the last 10 years.
First at bat in the majors. I think it was his first swing. Three-run bomb into the bullpen. Slayed it. Really? Guy's a beast. And then tomorrow, pitching for the Braves, I mean, do this kid Tommy Hansen. He's one of those guys, probably the five or ten guys that you'll pay money to go watch pitch. He's really good. So the Padres are going to have their hands full. We need to talk to Noah this week and see what he thinks, our little sports guy. Twelve-year-old Noah? He's a beast. All I know is that the San Diego Padres are not like that. Not being spoken of this way. No. You know, they went and signed John Garland, who has not been great. He's 0-2 so far. But, hey, man, you know, it's a long season, 162 games, and anything can happen. Yeah. Makes me nuts. I want to take you to a game, just me and you, weird, and I'm going to explain to you the beautiful intricacies of the game. Just me and you, though, Mikey. Really, dude? I can't go? Well, I guess.
Come on, man. I've been asking you to go to a Padre game since spring training started. I was going to even drive us out to Peoria on the back of my chopper, and you said no. I had to work, dude. Yeah, bro. I got us tickets. You said no. Whatever, man. I mean, you're going to take Mikey. Fine. Well, because you like baseball. Mikey doesn't really like baseball. I've got to explain how it works. Frank, you like baseball, or are you just watching Woods play baseball? Yeah, I like baseball. Frankie, what's with the crying? Yeah, I really want to hang out with you. You're crying, Sally. Fine, man. Pull it together. Let's go to a game, man. Thank you. Thanks. I'll give you a Kleenex. Appreciate it. You need another one? Oh, fine. I'll get you some lanolin. Oh, what? Keep your nose moisturized. I'm fine. You're my best friend, dude. You're mine. Thank you, bro.
Frankie. You guys really do need to hang out soon. His self-proclaimed best friend. Lauren, we're best friends, okay? Are we not? You guys are best friends. What about me and you? Can't we be best friends? What do we need to do? We gotta have a ceremony? No! Fine, we'll have a ceremony. We're not having a ceremony. That's weird. Kimonos at the duplex, bro. Let's do a ceremony. Kimono. Jay, can we borrow a couple of kimonos? Yeah, I got one to fit you. Of course Jay would have kimonos. Of course he does. I have a kimono. Weird. Why don't we just take Pepper's purse? Mom! My kimono's right from China. I know. Your purse isn't made of kimonos. Mine is. Hers is. That's right. Mom! Mom, buy me a samurai. I need a samurai sword. You mean a samurai sword? No, I mean an actual samurai. Buy me a DeLorean, get it up to 88 miles an hour, go back to the 13th century and buy me a samurai. Real one. Real samurai. Come on, mom. Please. So tell me about the 19-year-old girl in the back of the cop car. Oh, the genius? Yeah, what happened? Well, this girl in Florida was...
It seems like it was after a party. One of her friends who she was driving with got pulled over for drunk driving. She was arrested and taken to jail. So this 19-year-old girl was left stranded because she was in the car. And she said to the cops, you know, there were some other cops that were there. Can you guys give me a ride home? I don't have a ride. And so the cops were like, okay, yeah, well, yeah, hop in the back. We'll take you home. You know, doing a nice thing. She was. intoxicated as well, the 19-year-old. And when she got in the back of the cop car, she decided it was a brilliant idea to open a fresh brewski. Pops open the can. Cops turn around. Are you kidding me? You're a dummy. She was charged with misdemeanor underage drinking. And arrested, obviously. Dude, you're dumb. She was drinking Steel Reserve. That's the name of the beer? Yeah, it's a malt liquor. You've had it? Yeah, I think it only comes available in 40s. No. It's disgusting. When the cops heard the can open, they pulled over to see what was going on. They obviously knew what was going on. And she tried to hide it between her legs. That's a good one. That'll work. What do you mean? There's nothing. That'll work. Really? I'm not brilliant. I can't even believe it. I can't believe it. Oh, it's so gross. I'm at a loss. This is funny. Sunday, yesterday, Pepper goes...
For a walk. And went down to Old Town with her family. Her family is in town right now. Hi, Mr. and Mrs. O'Brien. From New Jersey, right? Yes. Are they listening? No. Never mind. The baby's trying to sleep now. Even said to my wife that Pepper said, I got to warn you about my mom now. She's going to embarrass me. Yep. She told us like way ahead of time. We're like, what do you mean? She's like, she'll do faces. She'll do like the whole thing. Will they not come up? They will, but they're not going to come in on Friday, I don't think. Can they come tomorrow? What if they come to lunch on Wednesday? Yeah, they're going to come to lunch. They are? Can they be on air? We don't want that. I want it so bad. Why? Pepper, please. Did they have accents? Yeah. Both of them? Oh, yeah. You've got to have them. My dad's. I don't know if my dad's is an accent or just weird. But your mom does? We saw one of the Minnie Coopers on the road the other day. He's like, oh, it's the cupper. Oh, my God. I didn't know that was a cupper. I want your mother to, like, come in and do bits. What if she calls? She can call. Oh, let's do that. She has one. For anyone that has an accent, she's got one voice that she does. She's like Adam Sandler. We call it her Francesca. So it doesn't matter if the person is from England or Alabama.
They all talk like this. Oh, wow. She's like Adam Sandler who has one comedic voice. Oh, hello. Why are you doing that to me? Actually, she does one that I won't even repeat, but it's like this. It's an alter ego. It's supposed to be her alter ego. Oh, boy. My other mother that calls and leaves messages for me. And another brick falls. I can't even. I can't even. I don't even know how she does it. She'll leave messages? Yeah. Save them. Like what? What does she do? I'll have to have her. She says. Her tagline is, hi, Lauren, it's me again. But she does it in this voice that I can't even. She goes, hi, Lauren, it's me again. Or like something. On your voicemail? Yes. She'll sometimes call me and then she pretends that her and the other mother are fighting over who wants to get out. Get out of here. Are you serious? They're like fighting over who gets to talk. She's doing a bit.
Doing a bit on your voicemail. Sometimes live. Question. And I'll go. Question. Hi, Mom. Sometimes live? Yeah. Like when she answers the phone. All right. So I'm you. Hello. Hi, Lauren. It's me again. Oh, God. Hi, Mom. Hey. Hey. Oh. Hi, Lauren. Hi, Mom. What are you? We're watching a movie. It was that stupid other mother of yours. She's punching me, trying to get to the phone. Matt and I are watching a movie. So what's going on? Oh. Okay, sorry. So for real. Wow. You are kidding me. That's great. Oh, wow. And another brick falls. And another brick falls from the wall. And that doesn't fall too far from the tree. No, it doesn't. Well, what I was saying to Lauren is you know that she's going to be that with her kid. I'm terrified. You're going to. No, it's like a bit at all times. It's a walking bit. Yeah, you won't get like. Oh, we have to.
Please. Don't get the real Joanne. She's just silly all the time. All the time. Can we put her on the air? Oh, we're going to. We have to. If she'll do it, then we're going to. I'll go pick her up in the morning. I'll go pick her up and drive her in. Wow. I did not like that. She just sent me a text message about something different. She's not listening. I thought she was listening and was going to be like, I'm going to call in. Oh, please. My dad calls in all the time. Let's just call her. Let's just call her right now. Can we call her? No, she's watching the baby. Oh. Yeah. I just called her in the hallway to make sure that my sister got dropped off, my other sister. She was like, hello. Doing a bit. No, no, no. For real. The baby's sleeping. She was like, I gotta call the baby. I'll see you later. I don't know how she, sometimes she'll get, she'll go, because she's doing it too much. Call me after your meeting. Yeah. But yesterday, that's what I put in my recap. It was like everyone we met. She's on the Mikey show. Oh, no. She's on the Mikey show. Really? That's what my mom does, too. Really? They're very proud. Did you get a name? No. Actually, I kept expecting people to be like.
I'm from Dallas. I don't know what the hell you're talking about. Are you embarrassed when she does it? My mom does this. When I go back to New Jersey and go shopping with her, she'll use like 87 coupons and like all this other stuff. She'll search for the exact change in her purse and she'll be like, my daughter, she's from California. She's a California girl. That's California. That's great. And I'm like, I'm not from California. I'm from New Jersey. I just live there now. And she'll be like, California girl. That's crazy. Everything I do gets attributed to being a Californian. There should be a sitcom called The O'Briens. Yeah. I'm on board. You said something else the other day about your parents. It was either your mom or your dad that did something that was embarrassing. It's her mom at the restaurant. Oh, yeah. Is it your mom? Well, yeah. My dad will ask for like 87. He did it last night. Iced tea with extra lemon. It's never enough. The 80 lemons. Yeah. And your mom is the one that does the bit of, we came to a restaurant to have a nice meal. We're paying for the meal. I want it the way I want it. If it's not hot, then she sends it back, and then everyone gets sent back so we can all enjoy a hot meal together. That guy. Crawl under the table. You guys would have died. You guys, this Friday, was it Friday night? Saturday night, we got pizzicato. And I picked it up, and I kept getting text message every second.
Can you get Sprite? Okay. Get another text message. Can you get ice? Okay. Another text message. Mom wants foil now because she needs to reheat the pizza. Oh, my God. Then it was like, one more. Did you get paper plates? And I was like. Yeah, bling. The spring breaks in your head. This is everybody's parents, by the way. Yeah, Lauren O'Brien from the Mikey Show drove her car into the ocean this week. It was never seen again. Luckily, Matt was driving, and luckily he's much more patient than I am. But, yeah, I walked in the door, and it was like the three of you. They were all, like, biting their nails, and they were like, hi. Hi, we're dead. Thank you. It's like us after the Irish Cyclone comes through. Yeah, scared to death. I kept my cool, though. I did. Did you? Yeah. I did. Did you? Yes. It's only but once a year they come to visit me. Have you, has the Irish Cyclone come out yet? No. Will the Irish Cyclone or do you keep the Cyclone in check? It'll be more like this. Mom. Mom. Matt saw it in the car though, huh? Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Well, he saw like the first round of the cycle, but. I love it so much. I hate it. The Irish Cyclone is my favorite. I hate the Irish Cyclone. I like to poke the Irish Cyclone. Well, Lauren is. Not easy. Lauren is a very.
She's a very demure. She looks so sweet and innocent. Does she? She does. Is she? She's wearing a sweater. So what? She's wearing a sweater with her hair back. Yeah. She looks so sweet. She's looking at you all sweetly. Is she? Real sweetly. Guess what, buddy? I'll slit your neck. Yeah. I'll slice your throat. Slice your throat off. From behind. You won't even know it. It's a good defense mechanism. Yeah. Sean Kingston. Yeah. Face drop. Got a few different directions we can go when we come back, and I'll let you decide. Do it next. You're listening to The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. In this episode of Mossy Nissan's Dare to Compare, the reliable Nissan Altima takes on challenger Toyota Camry in a race to the finish. The catch, they each get just one gallon of gas. And here comes the stylish Nissan Altima 2.5 S cruising in for the win. Hey.
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Hey, Lisa, AT&T lets us build a bundle and choose from home phone or wireless voice service for the same low price. Great, honey. And we get AT&T U-verse TV with DVR service that lets us record four shows at once. And high-speed internet from AT&T with blazing fast speeds. It's terrific. So, uh, I'm getting the AT&T bundle with wireless. Okay, Lisa? Wait, why don't we get the bundle with the home phone? Because with wireless, I'll have my own phone so your mom won't be calling every two minutes. Mother-in-law joke? Oh, no. Really? Funny, right? No. Way to go, big guy. Up high. Build an AT&T bundle starting at $99 a month with a one-year price guarantee. Call 1-800-PICK-ATT, visit our stores, or click att.com slash tv. Geographic and service restrictions apply. Call or go to att.com slash tv to see if you qualify. Taxes and limit charges apply. One year term required for bundled user services. Offering 71710 for details, visit att.com slash tv details. Attention to all Americans struggling with medical bills and credit card debt. Due to the economic crisis, a program approved by the United States government now may eliminate 100% of your medical bills and credit card debt entirely.
This program is now available to the general public through the Chapter 7 Federal Bankruptcy Act and here to offer Americans a fresh start during these hard economic times. We have one goal in mind with this program, and that is to allow Americans to keep their homes, cars, and personal property while eliminating 100% of your debts for good. For more information and to see if you qualify for this government-approved program, call the American Bankruptcy Hotline today, 800-304-0661. Over 1.5 million Americans are expected to take advantage of this opportunity this year alone. While the economy is getting worse and worse, there is no better time than now to file bankruptcy on your debts and walk away from 100% of it for good through this program. For more information, call America's bankruptcy hotline now. 800-304-0661. 800-304-0661. Again, that's 800-304-0661. Now, more of the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. We already did that one. I love that one. I know, but I queued up the wrong one. That's great. Let's do this one instead. What do you think? It's a good one. Metallica? Metallica. Welcome back. It's the Mikey Show. So, Sienna, tell me about the attacking cat. Tiger? In England.
Well, Tiger, the 19-year-old geriatric cat, has been attacking the postal workers in England recently. Really? And the cat's been attacking so much that no postal workers at Royal Mail will now deliver to the house. Really? Because they are so afraid of the cat, Tiger. There's been a few scratches to the ankle, you know, the usual cat attacks. But now the woman who owns the cat has to go to the post office to get her mail. They will not deliver there. Imagine what that 911 call may have sounded like. Emergency services, hello. Oh, yes, hello. Who am I speaking with? This is the emergency services operator. Oh, yes. What's your name, darling? I'm called Thaddeus. Oh, Thaddeus, how are you? Good. I'm calling, you'd never believe it. Oh, quiet now, Alyssa. I have this preposterous thing that's happening. I have a 19-year-old cat. His name's Lester. Hello, darling. Good gracious, that's an old cat. Yes, he's 19 years old. He's fairly harmless. Oh, stop it, Lester. But from time to time, he gets a little feisty. But what cat doesn't? You know what I'm saying? Oh, I definitely do, yes. Oh, so these dreadful posties, they've come to tell me they won't deliver the mail to my house because they're afraid of dear Lester. That's awful. Can you believe it, Lester? Stop.
Biting. Stop biting mommy's ankles. So, anyway, can you believe this? Is there something I can do to maybe... Can you force them to deliver to my house? Well, absolutely. That's secondarily, though. First, let's deal with the issue of Lester. Is that his name? Yes, Lester. He's such a dear. Sorry about your ankles. May I speak with him? Absolutely. Lester, the man wants to speak with you. Be nice. Hello. Hello, Lester. Hello. How are you? I'm well. You're 19, then. I am. That's very old. Listen, Lester, you can't just go attacking the posties. Why not? Well, because they're posties. They work for the government. And if you're caught red-handed, you could be apprehended and taken in for quite a while. I'm a cat. Yes, I realize this. But you can't just go around attacking the posties. You're getting to great trouble. I'm 19, which means I'm like 170 years old. Right. And what trouble could I be to some clown mailman? Well, obviously, you've gotten into some trouble because your owner is calling emergency services. So you've already impeded upon the postie. And so if you draw blood, just so you know, you could be in grave danger. I don't even have teeth. I'm a cat. I'm 19. I have no teeth left. Have you claws? I have claws. Have you? They're nubs. They're like nubs. Well, they're certainly not. I think the posties.
are kind of a little girlish. Well, perhaps the posties are human beings and they're tired of a 19-year-old Lester attacking and lesting their ankles. I'm a cat. Understand this. Lester, put your mother back on the phone. Hold on. He is a cat. There's no, there's absolutely no reasoning with Lester. Oh, tell me about the deer. But that's what makes him so lovable. He's quite a character. Oh, Lester, that's very venomous. That's awful. That's simply awful. Well, I'm going to send someone down to speak with you, dear. Okay. Do you think that they could maybe strong-arm the posties and get them to change their minds? I think if Lester doesn't mind his P's and Q's, we might be putting little kitty handcuffs on him or something. Oh, dear. Yes. Oh, this is quite serious. I'm sending an officer down to have a talking to with Lester. Oh, well, thank you, Thaddeus. I hope we can work this out. Thank you so much. Oh, have a lovely day. Goodbye. Goodbye. Thaddeus. It sounded like a cougar in the background. That's a big cat, right? That was a big cat. Old cat. That's right. By the way, just so you know, Woodsy did, in fact, go to Wolfstock this weekend. I almost went.
Where was it? I texted you. I know. I totally forgot. You need to give me a reminder text. I texted you and said, we're going to Wolfstock. Where is it? Balboa Park. Really? It was awesome. Was it? Yeah. Dogs everywhere and doing little tricks. Really? Saw a lot of dudes with Yorkies. And we had a conversation of, hey, man, do you guys catch a lot of grief? And they said, yeah, but who cares? It's our dogs. They're rad. I said, exactly. Exactly. Did you take your Yorkies with you? Yeah, we had Penny and Lucky with us. Yeah. Yep. Did you bring little trash bags? Yes, they were on the leash. We tied it to the leash. Yeah. Did you figure anything out about coyotes? Yeah, we did. We're going to put some of that fake grass, and we have a three-car garage, big time. And we're going to throw one of our garages is going to be just grass, fake grass, and they can go out there. They're not going outside unless we're with them. And I have my M16 with me. You're going to put fake grass and let them go poo-poo and pee-pee on the fake grass? Yeah, and then we'll just pick it up every day. But isn't it going to soak into the pee-pee, going to go into the fake grass? They have this charcoal layer that goes under there. Wow. And eventually what you do, I mean, you can spray it clean. So then there's just going to be urine running down my driveway, which my neighbors, I'm sure, will love. But you know what? So is this special grass for the purpose of... Yes. Really? Yeah, it's for dogs.
Oh, absolutely. Well, how cool. And they're even going to cut out big squares of it and give us to put around the house just in case. Yeah, no, I was going to say, we have, they're called a potty patch. Yeah, puddle pad. Yeah, we have one in our house right now because our dog stays inside when I'm at work and stuff. And like on Mondays, we're gone all day. And they go on the puddle patch? Yeah, no, and there's, what it is, is a little patch of fake grass and underneath is a tray. So if she poops, it's just, I pick it up and we'll like hose off the grass later. But if she pees, it goes underneath in the tray and you just dump it out. For real? Yeah. It's great. I talked to this guy. He was so cool, and we're going to totally make it right. Look at that. Yep. So problem solved. Didn't even know it existed. And I'm still putting up chain barbed wire out around the iron fence, and I'm still getting a gun. You're really serious. I love my dogs, dude. Hey, you know what? It's about seven grand worth of dogs. Those dogs are expensive. You would protect a $7,000 investment, would you not? Oh. I thought they were your children. It's got nothing to do with the investment. Yorkies are like $1,800. They're expensive, dude, and we've got four of them. It ain't about money. No, it's about the fact that I love them. It's about love. But you would protect your investment, and I do love them very much. Secondarily to them being an investment. Yeah, waste. No, no, no. They're love first. Were the two dogs that came this weekend the same as the ones that came before? Yeah, they're the originals. So you haven't even seen your other dogs? I saw them when I went home.
They're the OGs. They're the OGs, but the other two are lunatics and they won't fly. These two will fly. Our phone number is 570-1949, which you can call us at the beginning and end of every show. We open up the phone lines to you for anything you want or text us 949mikey at gmail.com. 13-year-old in Big Bear is trying to set a world record for something that I would never do. Being the youngest to climb Mount Everest. I would never, ever do that. 13 years old. I would never have done that at 13. 29,000 feet. That's insane. You wouldn't do it at 40. Dude, I was trying to get a handle on overeating at 13. He would be, if he can accomplish this, he'd be the youngest person ever to climb the world's highest mountain. He said, I just wanted to do something big, and this was something I wanted to do for myself. If he doesn't get it the first try, he's going to keep trying. Yeah, it's so expensive to even try. Is it really? It's huge. How many times have you tried? I've never tried or I would have done it. Are you going to? I don't think so. I don't think it's not on my list. Buy me a Sherpa. Mom! Mom, come on. Fly me to the top of Everest. I just want to go to the top to tell people I've seen it. Mom, get me an oxygen tank and fly me to the top of Everest. I wouldn't have any desire. I read Into Thin Air, and I have zero desire to ever climb any mountain. I haven't read Into Thin Air, and I have no desire to climb a mountain. I love climbing mountains, but that one just is extreme. Boy, I was really thinking about it until I read that book.
Sure. Okay. How about this one? Melissa Etheridge is going to return to rock. Yeah. Right. Did she leave rock? Apparently so. She's gearing up right now to release her new album, Fearless Love, which comes out the 27th of this month. Really? They're going to be playing it on all the rock stations. Gary going to add that one here? Yeah, right. It's going to be new on 94.9's the new Melissa Etheridge album. But my neighbors are stoked. I don't know, bro. Spin it. Give it a whirl. Give it a whirl, man. See if it sticks. Ask Scott. I asked Scott about it. He says it's number one with a bullet right now at PHZ. You guys really do sound like him. Says the record's working, baby. Make it happen. Maybe have Hillary try it out. We can ask her when she comes in if she's planning on giving it a spin. Yeah, let's see if she's got the new Melissa Etheridge with her today.
What was number one at the box office this weekend? It was Date Night. Really? 27 million. I almost saw Clash of the Titans. That was number two. My wife and I were going to go and put on the glasses. Yeah, it would have been a bunch of 16-year-olds. Yeah. Dudes. No, a lot of people saw Clash of the Titans, obviously. Hillary, we just read a story about how Melissa Etheridge is returning to rock music with a new album. Hillary has a huge smile on her face. And I said maybe Garrett would have a spin it. It's a rock record. Maybe have Hillary try it out. I'm not afraid. Do the new album. Let's give it a shot. She's more, you know, she's more triple A. She's more adult. I don't know. She rocks. She's coming back to rock. Scott Shannon said it's a hit. We're going to do Cage the Elephant right into Melissa Etheridge. Oh, gosh. Hey, I've been there, man. It is nice to work for a radio station where I actually really like all the music you play. Because I've definitely worked at stations where you're like...
Not so much. Yeah. It's our job to sell it, make it sound like we love it. Love this one. Yeah. All the beginning of my radio career, that's what I did. I probably played some Melissa Etheridge on Star. I did. I played Melissa Etheridge when she first came out. She was a rock artist. What was her first big hit? Was it Come to My Window? No, no. It was even before that. I'm the only one. I don't know. Because you're the only one. Yeah. I think that was it. I think that was the first one. Was that your Michael Shannon days? Yeah, it was. Let me hear Michael Shannon. I used to work. Oh, man. I played songs like This is Anne Marie on K-Wave 97. This one's called Danny's Song, and it's going out to, coincidentally enough, Danielle is listening to it. Oh, wow. Right now, I'm on her A-Side. Dude. It goes out to you. I could listen to him do that for hours. I'd be like, Mikey, do this one. Mikey, do this one. I want to hear more. I want to hear more. It's funny, you'd be the only one because no one listened to three listeners. What time were you on the air? I was the afternoon guy. That's a good slot. That's a good slot. Okay, wait, 97 FM. We're going to be taking lunch to somebody's office later this afternoon.
And so if you would like to be included in our office pool, go ahead and just write us here at K-Wave. You've got to send it by regular mail because email hasn't been invented yet. This is Mandy Barry Manilow on K-Wave. Oh, God. Did she nail that? I swear to God, I could listen to it all day. Never hits the post. Great song. He nails it every time. Everything was about offices and, you know. That's your lunchtime commute. I mean, every radio station does that, too. We'll bring you lunch to your word. I'm crying right now. My favorite thing is in our building, we have Kiffam, the smooth jazz station, and they do really well. They have tons of office listeners. And so you hear them on the air, like Kelly in the afternoon, and she's so smooth on the air. And then off the air, like, Chris, I'm like, what's up? Like, so funny. So funny. You know. The differences. I bet people. When they saw Michael Shannon, we're like, really? Really? You're Michael Shannon. BS. I can tell you from personal experience, they were like, no, really, where is he? No, seriously. Where is he? Did you eat him? Did you eat Michael Shannon? We're a big, tall white guy. K-Wave 97 FM. Yes. K-Wave 97 FM.
I'm going to be taking some donuts, if I don't eat them all, over to your company tomorrow morning. And just want to thank everybody for listening today over at PG&E, Chicago on K-Wave 97 FM. I mean, nailed. Nailed. That is unbelievable. The goofiest job I ever had. I practiced in my car and I was trying to do it. I can't ever do it. It's hard. It's really hard. Oh, man. It helps, though, when you're at the station, you see how much time you have. Like, there's a bar that tells how much time. You know what else helps? Being 350 pounds and not having a girlfriend. That helps. And you can just do it all day long, and that's all you do. And loving that music, too. Yeah. You know what helps? Having an 8-track in your car that really, that's the only 8-track you have in Chicago. Yeah, Chicago. Let me try for the 450th time. That's my favorite. Hill, what do you got coming up today? Oh, my gosh. I have no idea. The Clash, probably. Yeah, I'm going to go grab CDs. I'm out. All right. It's going to be awesome. That's right. All right. We got to get out of here. We got to go. Lovely and talented Hillary is up next. We'll be back tomorrow morning. And we'll do the whole thing over again at 6 o'clock. Mikey shows out late. ET San Diego. A Lincoln Financial Media Station. Mikey in the morning. About the music all day and night. M94.9. It's about the music.