The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 05/11/11
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
operation street impactskype microsoft acquisitionbin laden photosautism vaccine debateprom draftcamel word giveawayzit poppingchaz bono gender transitiondeath adder storyindependence jamcricut smartphone planssea world tickets
Mikey hosted the show, discussing the upcoming Operation Street Impact event with Woods and Lauren, the Microsoft Skype acquisition with Sienna and Jay, a Facebook poll on releasing Osama bin Laden photos, the Pace Environmental Law Review study linking vaccine injury compensation to autism with Rebecca, the controversial prom draft at Rancho Buena Vista High School, the camel word-of-the-day giveaway, Sienna's story about popping her husband Todd's butt zit, and a conversation with caller Chad about Chaz Bono and gender transition.
What happened, in order
Operation Street Impact Harley Giveaway
Mikey promotes the OSI event at Qualcomm Stadium where attendees receive stickers and a chance to win a $24,000 Harley Davidson from San Diego Harley-Davidson.
Microsoft Skype Acquisition Talk
Mikey, Sienna, and Jay discuss Microsoft's $8.5 billion purchase of Skype, comparing it to FaceTime and speculating on integration.
Bin Laden Photo Release Poll
Mikey shares results of a Facebook poll asking whether dead Osama bin Laden photos should be released, with most respondents saying no.
Vaccine-Autism Study Discussion
Mikey explains a Pace Environmental Law Review study showing vaccine injury compensation for autism cases and debates whether vaccines cause autism.
Word of the Day Camel Contest
Mikey announces that when he says the word 'camel' before 10, caller nine wins a four-pack of SeaWorld tickets and lunch for two at On the Border.
Sienna's Butt Zit Story
Sienna recounts popping an infected zit on her husband Todd's butt, describing the painful oozing experience and the couple's reaction.
High School Prom Draft Controversy
Mikey describes a Facebook-promoted prom draft where senior guys pick dates for Rancho Buena Vista High School, sparking debate about fairness and bullying.
Chaz Bono Gender Transition Talk
Caller Chad discusses his aunt's relationship with a woman who transitioned to man, exploring perceptions of sexuality and gender identity.
People mentioned
mikeywoodslauren o'briensiennajaychrisrebeccajakenitajamieadammichael bazewillie shoemakersecretariat
36,195 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
So the weather forecast says overcast. I'm not buying it because it said that yesterday and it was beautiful out. So it is my belief that today will be absolutely gorge. And I'm going to stick with that. I'll say gorge anymore, please. I'm going to definitely say it on the reg. Oh, wow. Welcome. My name is Mike, but on the radio I go by Mikey because I can't get rid of that. It's stuck. Dug in. Let's dug in. I'm 40 years of age and begin training with my workout person on Monday. All right? You know, hopefully drop some LBs. Woods is our sports guy, and it's day two of the black beanie. I like it. I think it looks good. It makes him look tough. It makes me feel secure. Yeah. And it's real comfy. To his left, my right, is Lauren O'Brien. She's a comedian.
And she's 30 years of age, blonde hair, today wearing a pink scarf. Let's hear it, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. To my left, Woods' right, is the gorgeous Sienna. She is 26 years old. She has auburn-colored hair. And she has a very funny recap today and has to do with being a wife. A lot of you dudes may have it worse, may have it better. Better, I'm sure. No. You know, listen. You don't realize. Women don't realize. Okay. We'll find out. And Jay is our producer. He's 48 years old. I will love you violently. Oh. What was that, Charlie Sheen? I will love you violently. He just loved me. It's up to me. Stay away from the crack. Never smoked crack, Charlie. Never have. I'm lying. Never has. Well, the scoreboard says, you know, drinking. I drank. I didn't do crack, though, Charlie.
You've been warned. I don't know why you're warning me. I didn't. Shut up. Okay. Shut up. Stop. Move forward. Okay. And Jay is our producer. Screening phones for us is a 22-year-old young man. And his name is Chris. There you go. The word of the day is camel. And sometime between now and 10, I will use the word camel. And when I do, caller number nine will get a four-pack of tickets to SeaWorld and lunch for two at On the Border. OSI is so close now. OSI is only three days away. Operation Street Impact. And talked to our promotion director yesterday, Adam. And Adam says, you know, it starts at 10, goes till 1. You probably want to get out there early, get lined up, and there will be FM 94.9 staff out there directing you at Qualcomm where to park. If you've been sleeping under a rock and you don't know what OSI is, Operation Street Impact, this is our sticker campaign. It is the second incarnation of a Mikey Show sticker here at FM 94.9.
But I have to say, I'm extraordinarily proud of us as a show to put this sticker out there. It's nice. Feels like the first one, doesn't it? It has that feeling to me. It's bad, dude. This sticker is just, it's bad. It's awesome. And I can't wait to give it out. It's going on cars on Saturday morning at 10. And as if that was not enough reason to come out. You know, because we get the people to come out just for the sticker. But we wanted to blow this thing out. And that's why we decided on Qualcomm. It needed to be a place that could accommodate. Because we're giving away a $24,000 FXDB Harley Davidson motorcycle from San Diego Harley Davidson. Winning. And one person is going to open up an envelope. Everybody that comes through, we will be out there putting stickers on your car and you'll get an envelope handed to you. One person is going to open up that envelope.
And they're going to win a Harley Davidson. Bam. Freaking awesome. It's amazing to me. And somebody's going to get a home theater install. Somebody's going to get his and her mountain bike from Haro. Somebody is going to get... Oh, by the way, I want to mention with the home theater, that's from Tried and True Home Theater and Security install. People will be winning classes at Choose Fitness. People will be getting... Pretzel crisps. People will be getting $10 power cards from Dave & Buster's, sushi poppers, NutriShop, Rockstar energy drinks. There's going to be a lot of big prizes out there. An Ibanez guitar. So we want you to come out. We'll be there. After you get the sticker on your car, park, hang. What was the decision, Jay? I know yesterday Ian was talking a little bit about the Xbox thing. Yeah, I think what he's going to do is he's got two ladies that are going to come out and hand out cards. So they're going to be – I don't know if he's going to set the TV up or not, but he's going to have a little 10x10 setup where you can come over and talk to him. Okay. Okay, cool. It's going to be the biggest event outside of Mikeethon, biggest event we've done. And it is – I mean, I –
My family, friends, basically everybody I know that lives in San Diego County, everybody I know, they're coming to this thing. It's free to get in the parking lot. You just pull in the main entrance and then you'll take a right and you'll follow the loop road all the way around. Right. It's free. There's nothing to pay for. It's just you get a sticker and you could win a motorcycle. You could win all this different stuff. And we're going to be out there. It's giant. Okay, so a few things in the news. First of all, Yesterday it was announced, and it was sort of like breaking news, that Microsoft is buying Skype for how much, Sienna? Eight and a half billion dollars. Wow. They outbid Google and Facebook, who offered three to four billion. Eight and a half billion. I mean, that's just an idea that someone had. Skype. And now is a billionaire. That's the coolest thing out there, though. Oh, my gosh. It's pretty cool. 145 million users on average each month go on Skype. Wow. I'm on Skype. I was too when Jamie lived in Texas and I lived here. We Skyped every day. I use it just for conference calls. It's a great conference call tool as well. Nita, our Hungarian nanny. Yeah. That's okay. All right, Jay. She has a Skype? Well, when she was in Hungary. What did he say? She has a Skype? Yes, Jay. Oh, wow. Oh, boy. Jay, you're married? God.
You have children younger than Nita, our nanny. I'm just saying it's neat that she has that. Is that what you're saying? That it's neat that she has that? That's Nita. Nita. I'm Nita, Hungarian nanny. Hungry for a Hungarian. She's beat from her head down to her feet. It's the air out of the room, didn't it? It's like a vacuum. Yeah, like a black hole of perversion. All right. Well, anyway, that's how we talked to her in Hungary before she came out here was the Skype. Just Skype, not the Skype. The Skype, and I've used it once. I don't care for it because I don't understand it.
It seems complicated to me. It's the same thing you have on your iPhone? That's what I'm saying. It's the same thing, your FaceTime. I prefer FaceTime. Of course you do. And FaceTime is what comes with Apple products. Now, my guess is the reason that Microsoft paid $8.5 billion to Skype is so that they can have their version of FaceTime. Yeah. And they're going to meld the two together on their computers. Great call. And it is a great call. Basically, the calls that are being made at Microsoft are as follows. Let's see what Apple does. And then when they do it, we'll do sloppy seconds. It's reactionary. Yes. I've used both. Skype is 100% better. Agreed. I think so, too. When have you used? Conference calls, I told you. No, but when have you used FaceTime? I have it on my computer at home. I use it with Kim's parents. We talk with them weekly. You have a Mac at home? Absolutely. I have the same Mac you have in here. I did not know. Yeah, I've used both. Skype just far and outweighs. How come? What's the deal? It's just easier. It's ease of use. It pops up easier. All the stuff is just very intuitive.
Every time I restart my computer, Skype opens up automatically. I don't know how to call people. I don't know why it's so cool. Yep. Yeah, it does. I had to delete it from my deal. When Jamie moved here, I had to delete it from my Mac because it was driving me batty. You just go into preferences and set it up. I'd rather not. I'd rather just work. It does. It works perfectly. Oh, my God. It just happened without me having a fool with it. Yeah, me too. But we'll see. I would ask you when you were setting up, you want to put this on your desktop? And you were like, yes, I do. I remember the first time I used it, I had to go set up a Skype account, which was a beating. Yes. It was a beating. Now, if they can trim that down, I just say buy a Mac. But hey, listen. You have to set up a username when you first get your Mac, though. Once. Yeah. One time with Skype. And I don't have to set that up with my FaceTime. It's real easy. I just open up FaceTime. My name's already there. With FaceTime, it knows everything from your computer. It takes care of everything. It loads it all in. It does everything. But the other people have to have FaceTime. Anyone can have Skype. Yeah, that's true. That's true. I will investigate Skype more because people seem to enjoy it. I love it.
Microsoft just paid $8.5 billion for it. Facebook. Now, I want to just, for a moment, imagine that now, first of all, we got to back up. Oh, I feel terrible. There's so many people listening right now that are like, dude, what the hell is Skype? You're talking about it 10 minutes. I don't even know what it is. Skype is an internet website that uses the camera that you have on your computer so that you can talk with people and look at them at the same time. Anywhere in the world, you can do it. and Microsoft just paid that much money for it. Now, I want to imagine a world in which Facebook had done it. Why would they want it? Why would a website want it? I understand why a company that makes computers would want it. I understand that because they want to integrate it into their computer system. There's your answer. Okay, but why would Facebook want it? Because they're a website. They're not a computer. But imagine going to Facebook, having friends that have...
the same type of computer that you do. Yeah. And imagine being able to click a button and talk to your buddy that lives in South Carolina and through Facebook. Okay. You click on his face. You want to FaceTime Gabe? Yes. I just don't understand why Facebook couldn't do that without. They probably could. It's like a phone call network as well. Like if you want to call somebody in London, you don't have to call using a landline any longer. You just pay like a dollar a month. and you can talk to them as long as you want. That's awesome. You can hook a telephone up to your computer, and you just talk to them. Like, I've been in... You have to pay for Skype? You have to pay for certain levels of Skype. For the voiceover IP, you have to. I paid for conference calls, because that's what I use. I use it as a conference call tool. Like, I could call six, seven people at once from my home phone, or my home computer, and just we could all talk. Sounds good. It was amazing. Yeah. How come we don't do that? We should do that as a show. Maybe you just pick up the phone and call me. Well, I mean, but maybe, imagine our meetings. I'd be thrilled. Yeah, we're at our house, we're chilling, we're having a meeting, we could see each other, we're talking. Yeah, we didn't do the video portion of it, we just did the phone part. I don't know if I'd want to see Woods in his home. Fair enough. There is guaranteed to be material not suited for all viewers.
Woods were FaceTiming with us. Maybe I'd be in my silk robe in front of the mirror. At some point. How did you get gum on your pants? You would jame gum us. Yes. Oh, dude. Absolutely. Hey, Woods, click in. I'd click in. All of a sudden, the camera for Woods would come up and we wouldn't even have a chance. He would be standing there in a robe like jame gum in Silence of the Lambs doing the talk. Be the greatest. Let's all do it. Have you seen Marlena? Let's all do it. Well, there it is. And then this is a local, you know, you can call us 570-1949. Local story that's pretty big. You know, the Del Mar races have lost a jockey that's very famous. Michael Baze. B-A-Z-E. If you've gone to the Del Mar races for any length of time and you've had fun just betting a couple of bucks on the ponies, you've seen his name.
A lot. Yeah, very sad, man. He was 24 years old. He rode in the Kentucky Derby and was found dead in his vehicle Tuesday at Churchill Downs in Louisville, Kentucky. They don't know the cause of death. They're not suspecting foul play at this point, but they are going to do an autopsy. It's really, really sad. This guy, in the land of the jockeys, this guy was up there with... The best. I mean, his career earnings, $32 million, 918 wins. He was a guy that you had to take into account when you were betting. I always bet on him. Yeah, I mean, he's one of those. There are certain names. And if you see that name, you go, yeah, I have a good chance. Nakatani. Calvin Burrell. Baze. Yep. There's a lot of them. There's a lot of guys that are. Willie Shoemaker. Well, Woods, I was thinking more of, you know, sort of the more contemporary. Oh, okay. You know, the contemporary jockeys that are well known here in Del Mar. When asked about jockeys, that's my standard answer. Willie Shoemaker. Yeah. Secretariat. Yeah. Either or. Well, hello there. Hello there. Willie Shoemaker. Real big player in the 70s. Yeah.
But anyway, that's sad news. That was terrible, man. Michael Bayes. So they don't know what caused it, but we will let you know as soon as we know. Some senators want to see, not want to see, can see. Yes. The photos we all want to see. Now, we know that President Obama said that he will not be releasing publicly the photos of Osama bin Laden once he was killed. However, the CIA told members of the Senate Intelligence and Armed Services Committees that they can make an appointment with the intelligence agency to look at the photos of Osama bin Laden's body if they wish. Wow. Crazy. Woods, when I said that, you snapped your fingers almost... I read it sort of sarcastically going, oh, too bad. No. Maybe I read that wrong. You did. I was bummed. I want to see them. Yeah. And I think we deserve to see them. Well, I put out a Facebook question a couple of days ago where I asked listeners what they thought about those photos. And I asked them, should dead Bin Laden photos be released? 329 people. Wow.
gave an answer. And I'm just going to go down the list and just start reading them. No, no, yes, yes, no, yes, no, no, no, no, no. Yes, yes, no, no, no. Wow. Yes, no, no, yes, yes, no, no, no, no. Seems like almost overwhelmingly no. Yeah. More people than not say no. The people that say yes think that we have a right to see it. I believe that he's dead. So I don't really need to see pictures. I've changed my mind. Do you have? I want to see him.
And also, meanwhile, several of bin Laden's adult sons said in a statement yesterday to The New York Times that killing their father was a violation of international law, and I'm reading this to you, as well as the presumption of innocence and the right to a fair trial. They're accusing the U.S. of violating its principles by killing an unarmed man, shooting his family members, and burying his body at sea. Rosie O'Donnell said the same thing, which she may be. may have a point by saying that he was entitled to a fair trial. There may be a point there. The thing that got me about Rosie O'Donnell's deal is it's almost pointless to say and almost insensitive to say in light of the fact that the U.S. military said that he wouldn't, he was resisting. Now, I wasn't there, but I'm just going to take him at their word that he was resisting.
Two to the chest, one to the head. Now, when you're considering what bin Laden's sons have said, ultra liberal, when you're considering that, consider the care and international law that bin Laden took into account when crashing a couple of planes into the Twin Towers. Not that one evil deed should bring another evil deed, because I don't believe that. I'm just saying. He killed innocent people. I understand. Bin Laden wasn't innocent. I ain't saying it's right. I'm just saying I understand. That's all. I didn't know Rosie had said that. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah, Rosie. How about this? This is a crazy story. This guy is celebrating this miracle that his wife has woken up from a coma.
She was brain dead, pronounced brain dead by doctors. Gabrielle Gifford's husband? She is not. Oh, she's not. She is not brain dead. No, she's taking spring break trips down to Florida. She's not taking spring break trips. She's not brain dead. She had a bullet in her brain. That's right. Many people have. A lot of folks have. She's recovering. You guys are taking you, and when I say you guys, I mean... Woods and Lauren are taking the opportunity to point that out because they feel that it's inappropriate that Gabrielle Gifford's husband was going to fly in a space shuttle mission. Well, I just want to say this first. Doctors are saying this is... A miracle. Quote, a miracle. This is an amazing story. 56-year-old Gloria Cruz. This happened in Australia. She underwent brain surgery after a tumor was discovered after she suffered a stroke in March. She went to the hospital. Doctors told her husband the case was hopeless and that she would probably die within 48 hours. Well, after two weeks, a breathing tube was inserted into her mouth after her husband begged them to do it.
And he said, I'm not giving up hope. I'm a religious man. I believe in God. I believe in miracles. They did it. And the ventilator was turned off. And she woke up. Oh, wow. She woke up. And it's, I mean, it's just amazing. The whole thing is an amazing story. And the doctors, you know, they recommended the ventilator be removed. They said there's no way she's going to make it. She's brain dead. It's crazy. I know. And the husband says, I told him that God knows how much I love her. that I don't want her to suffer, but I don't want her to leave us. And he just said he fought. He fought those doctors. That's so great. And she's okay. So great. Yeah. If you don't know, my oldest son, Jake, is high-functioning autistic. Autism news comes on all the time. I barely blink. You see it all the time. Yesterday, they actually interrupted television. They interrupted television with breaking news about autism. And vaccines. Wow. And I'm, let me tell you, I took some freaking notice yesterday. We'll tell you about it next.
570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. How did you morons even get in here? More coming up on FM 94.9. It's almost here, and it will sell out in advance. FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Evasion. Presented by Miller Lite. Sunday, June 5th at the Oceanside Pier Amphitheater. Ten great artists on two stages and one wandering ombre playing swampy, heavy-sounding blues. Perform. I want to see you. Blood to softback. Heavy. Tickets are only $35 with no additional fees. As always, $1 of every ticket sold will go to the About the Music Fund, which helps to support music education in San Diego County Public Schools. Tickets are on sale now, but they're going fast. Purchase them online at independencejam.com or at fm949sd.com. FM 94.9 Independence Jam. Coastal Invasion. Presented by Triple Hops Brewed Miller Lite.
Taste greatness. Independence Jam is also supported by Grubbies and Los Tacos. See you on Sunday, June 5th in Oceanside. I'm about to hit y'all with some truth. That's right. I call this poem Best Girlfriend Ever. It had been a long day and an even longer week. So I headed toward the kitchen, refreshment I did seek. But after swinging open the fridge, I saw the most horrific sight. Not a single cold beverage. Not a single Coors Light. Perhaps behind the milk. Or the dill pickle spears. But there was still no Coors Light. No ice cold beers. So I raced down the stairs to the mini fridge below. Not one silver bullet. No blue mountain glow. I grabbed my keys. It was time to hit the store. But stopped when I heard a knock knock at the door. It was my girlfriend. Bearing gifts of Coors Light. Best girlfriend ever? You got that right. Thank you. And I love you, Aaron. Frost Brewed Coors Light. The world's most refreshing beer.
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Perform live at SeaWorld. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I love guacamole. Lauren. And I'm a clump and an idiot. Woods. I cry more than I watch. Sienna. I would just scream, not because I was sad, just to hear myself scream. And Jay. I like my coffee black. On FM 94.9. So we're going to tell you this autism thing that we saw yesterday that I saw on television that was, and then I just, my wife and I started researching if you have kids or you're. Anything to do with that, you might be interested in hearing about this, okay? Word of the day is camel. So when you hear me say the word camel between now and 10, caller number nine is going to get a four-pack of tickets to SeaWorld and lunch for two at On the Border. Okay, so apparently there was something called the Pace Environmental Law Review. And they did a study. And what this study revealed was that...
Over the last two decades, the National Vaccine Injury Compensation Program, to explain, by the way, it's federal law. You can't sue vaccine companies. The reason that you can't sue them is because if they were ever sued, they could be put out of business. And so there was something put in place because if they were sued, everybody would sue. And then there wouldn't be any more vaccines. You see what I'm saying? Absolutely. So they put this thing in place called the National Vaccine Injury Compensation Program. And what it was there to do is pay people that were legitimately injured by a vaccine. Does that make sense? Legitimately. In other words, they really study it. They really go through it and they go, yes, beyond a shadow of a doubt, this was the cause of your injury. Sure. Okay. Does that make sense? Absolutely. Okay. So what this Pace Environmental Law Review revealed was that over the last two decades, the NVICP has been quietly compensating dozens of vaccine injury cases involving children with autism. Holy cow. The preliminary findings showed approximately 1,300 cases of vaccine injury.
resulted in childhood brain injury, 83 of which had autism. The National Autism Association says the study further underscores the need for congressional hearings. So they are pushing for immediate congressional hearings on this. Wow. Now, there was always a lot of interest centered around one particular vaccine called the MMR shot. Which, by the way, I want to point out, my son Jake has never received. He's never gotten the MMR shot. And he is autistic. And he's autistic. Now, obviously, the question is, if vaccines do not cause autism, why were these people paid in lawsuits for the vaccines? OK, that's the question. Sure. And again, I want to say.
I am not saying vaccines cause autism. I'm not saying that. In fact, if I did say that undeniably, especially as a parent with a kid with autism, I believe I would be completely irresponsible, completely irresponsible. And so I'm not saying that. And I also want to make it very clear that I'm also not saying it. And the reason is because I don't know. All I can do is give you this information. OK, listen to this. Rebecca went on the CDC site and she wanted to see how many vaccines she got up to the age a year old. And it turns out that she got four. She got four vaccines back in 1975 to the age one years old. Let me read to you what you get shots for in 2011 up to a year old. At birth, you get a shot for hepatitis B. At one to two months, you get another shot for hepatitis B. One to two months, you also get a rotavirus vaccine. You get vaccinated for diphtheria, tetanus, and pertussis. You get vaccinated for the flu. You get vaccinated for pneumonia. You get vaccinated for polio. Two months later, you're given another rotavirus vaccine.
You're given another diphtheria, tetanus, and pertussis. You're given another flu shot. You're given another pneumonia shot. You're given another polio shot. At six months, you're given a booster again for the rotovirus. You're given another shot for the diphtheria, the tetanus, and the pertussis. You're given another shot for influenza. You're given another shot for pneumonia. By the way, Jake, my son Jake, he had all these. At six months, did I just say six months or four months? You said six. Did I talk about four months? Yes. Well, you went. I went through four months? Yep. About every two months, then the child is born. They're getting five to six shots. Five to six shots every two months. Not fun. Yeah. For the baby. Yeah. Or the parent. Now, at that point, we stopped with Jake. After six months? No, at a year. At a year. Because I've gone up. Now, at a year, at 12 months, another hepatitis B.
Excuse me. Six months. I forgot to mention hepatitis V. And there is another polio shot. And then at a year, another hepatitis B. There's some at nine months, too. Influenza, pneumonia, polio. They recommend MMR at 12 months. Something called varicella. And two doses of a hepatitis A shot. It's a lot of shots, my man. Well, it's over 24, Woods. In the course of a year? Yeah. It's over 24. Okay? Wow. Rebecca got four when she was born in 1975. She couldn't find the information from me at 1970. I'm 40 years old. So, again, I don't know. I don't know. And here's the thing that bugs me about it, too, is that... And I said this to Rebecca. I said, clearly, vaccines are not causing autism in all kids. We can say that for certain. I can say that for certain. I don't have to argue about it. I don't have to say I don't know. I do know. What I can tell you definitively is that some kids get all those shots and they're healthy. Right. A lot of kids. In fact, more kids than not.
OK, so if you're saying to yourself, well, do I vaccinate? I would say what the doctors say, which is, yeah. Now, if you ask me, Mike, what about you? Are you? No. And this is the reason that I'm not. I got an autistic kid. Yeah. Now, if I didn't, I probably would. I probably would vaccinate. If I didn't have a kid with autism already, we would vaccinate. But see, in somebody like Sienna's case, who just had a baby eight, nine months ago, there's no basis. All she knows is that the doctors... I would do what the doctors recommend. I would do what the doctors recommend. If I didn't have a kid with autism, I would. But now, CCN knows you, Mike, and knows the situation that you and Rebecca are in with your son, Jake. When Jamie and I were adopting our child, we were beating our heads against the wall going, yes, no, maybe. Well, this is what they say about autism. What causes autism? It is, they believe... A predisposition combined with an environmental influence. Sure. Environmental could mean the shot. If, if, if, IF, if vaccines are the cause. Now, you guys vaccinated Jake. You just didn't give him the MMR. We didn't give him the MMR, which is the one that people call so much into question. Right. But it could be any of them. Well, Rebecca was looking at the different ingredients.
That go into the shots that we did give him. And there are tiny, tiny, and I mean tiny, trace amounts of a lot of different things that she's not comfortable with, but only because we have a autistic kid. Right. So when we had Luke and Ryan, our twins, we didn't give them any vaccinations. And the reason that we didn't was because. We thought to ourselves, well, if they have any disposition to it, we don't want to add anything we're not 100 percent sure about. Makes sense. And what we know now is that we have two perfectly typical developing kids that don't have any issues. Right. And so but I do think that this is relevant because they've been suing and winning. Yeah, it's very relevant. Suing and winning. And so we've very quietly been paying off kids that they've given the MMR vaccine to. And dude, here's the thing. Like, I think that it's really important that our kids don't get the measles and the mumps and rubella. And I don't want, you know, what if these things make it? You know, you've heard this. What if they make a comeback because people aren't vaccinating their kids? That's a big deal. All I know.
And I said this to Rebecca last night because if I think about it too much, I can obviously I can get very upset because I picture a world where Jake doesn't have autism and what that little guy would be like if he didn't have the issues that he has. What would that look like? And then if I think the reason that he has the issues that he has is the result of a corporation, I can lead myself to insanity. Yes. And so what I'd say to myself instead is, well, praise God that he's got autism because we've raised almost $100,000 for Rady Children's Hospital and their Autism Discovery Institute. And my wife and I have grown because of it, you know. But boy, I sure do wish that we could figure out why this autism thing happens. Sure. And stop it.
And I really do hope that they get a congressional committee together to get into it. If for no other reason that they say, hey, listen, we studied this thing up one way and down the other and it ain't vaccines. Yeah, dude, they put congressional hearings together for steroids and baseball. They certainly do it for something like this. You know what I mean? It just makes sense. Well, you know, Rebecca had a good point. She said, you know. And I know this, back in the day, back when Jay was born in the 1700s, the causes of death were different. The causes of death were... The plague. Yeah, causes of death were things like the plague. Honestly, if you go to Balboa Park Museum, they have how people died back in the day, right? And the way that they died was from things like diphtheria. They died from things like malaria. They died from things like that. OK, now they die of cancer and heart disease. That's what people die of today. Mostly cancer and heart disease. And Rebecca was saying, you know, I just don't think our bodies were necessarily designed to have a bunch of stuff put in them. And I said, yeah, babe, but you can't discount good stuff.
Like there's good stuff that we put into ourselves that we weren't designed for. We weren't designed for penicillin, but that takes away infection. We weren't designed for it, but we introduce it because it helps us. And, you know, so two sides to the argument. Anyway, it's something I'm passionate about because, you know, of Jake. But I wanted to tell you all about it. That's wild. Let's see. Lots of things happening. Yesterday. L.O.B. went shopping downtown and not downtown and P.B. She's on her phone and in a very courteous move because she's on her phone, she decided that she didn't want to talk inside of the store on the phone. So she went outside and she had a conversation outside. And while she was saying goodbye, she started walking back into the store. And this old man sees her and he stops. And in a high-pitched, mocking voice, he said, Yeah, honey, I'll be home soon. Gotta make dinner. Weird. What? L.O.B. nervously laughs at the guy. What? Because he's talking to her. He nervously laughs. She laughs at the guy. Okay, all right. Bye-bye. And she thinks to herself, what a D. But then she feels bad because she's like, I'm thinking an old man is a D. But...
What happens in your head where you go, like one day you know it's inappropriate to go, okay, honey. And then the next day you're 63 and a half and you're like, it's okay now. I'll do it now. Holy cow. Yeah, holy cow. The Pepperidge Farm guy got you real good. Oh, yeah. He was definitely way older than 63. How old do you think? Probably about 79. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. And he was... I couldn't decide whether or not he was making fun of me for being on the phone or for being a woman. I couldn't figure it out. Either way, I was like, I feel like I should be offended. Or my voice. You're like, hey, I'm sorry I vote. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I've been given the right. I apologize for having the right now to vote. Holy cow. He had said something to me and I was just, you know me, I can't do two things at once. So I was saying bye. I was actually saying bye to Woods. And so I was like getting off the phone with him. And then before I could even process what he said, I was already walking past him. And I was like, what did he? What was he thinking? What was he thinking? That's awesome. Yes, honey.
I'll be home soon. I'll have dinner ready. Oh my gosh. And so you do what anybody would do. You go... Nervous laughter. So what did you make for dinner? I didn't. How dare you. I know. Neither did Sienna. Sienna said in her recap that she's been the world's worst wife recently. She hasn't made dinner in two weeks. Two weeks? She says that she's not hungry for dinner anymore. So she doesn't have any motivation to make it. Happy birthday, she says. HBD to you. That's what I said. But here's what she does do, which I commend. She always makes sure that Todd, her husband, has something to eat. So she'll order something, she'll pick something up, or she'll make him soup. Wow. Soup's really not a meal, is it? Just open that can real good. Do you do it in a saucepan or put it in the microwave? No microwave. What do you do? What do you do? I open the can of chunky soup. I pour it into a pot on the stove. Oh, that's better. I don't do microwave. That's better. Sounds like home cooking to me. Yesterday, he had leftover Chinese food, chicken fried rice. Did you warm it? I warmed it. I brought it to him.
I don't even know what that dish is, Sienna. Oh, okay. Now that one I think I know. Oh, wait. That is the type that's sweet and sour, but it's still crunchy on the outside. Okay, got it. Smells like carrots and throw up. So I think that it's commendable that you're a dinner maker. My wife's a dinner maker. She makes dinner. Well, I used to be. I wonder how many dudes are listening right now that their wives cook dinner. Or is that a lost? I used to do it every night. She did. Kim does it for us. Every night. But I work, too, during the day. So he can make it just as well as I can. I work just as much as he does. Look at it this way, Sienna. At least you have a husband to decide to make or not make dinner for. So, two sides. L.A.B. That pill to swell. Matt's not hungry. He's full of milk. He's getting it for free.
Is he? He's talking about... Why buy that cow if you get the milk? He's talking about L.O.B.'s boyfriend. He's talking out of school is what he's doing. He's full of milk. That he got for free. Yeah, you're the cow. Do you get it? You got it. You want me to bring some sort of illustration in there? If you want, I'll go tackle one of those dudes down at Chick-fil-A wearing a cow costume. I'll bring him in here, and I'll be like, look at this, Lauren. That's you. You're the cow. And I'm Matt underneath. I'm Matt. Just squirting the milk right in my mouth. Exhibit A. Exhibit B. You're A. All right. Here we go. Free, free, free, free, free, free, free, free, free, free, free. Free milk. Utterly ridiculous. Oh, wow. Oh, man. I heard. I liked that one. Thank you. Thank you. Move over. Holy cow. So L.O.B., you know, she's been dating her boyfriend for three years and at some point, you know. And counting. And change. And at some point, we know, we know that he's going to pop the question. Do we? Yes, we do. He's going to. He better do it by this weekend. No. Well, here's the thing. I wonder how many guys are listening.
And, Jay, did you say, does Kim, your wife, does she make dinner every night? Well, not every night, but, I mean, most of the time she makes some dinner. Not every night? No, sometimes I do. So if she doesn't, you do. Yeah. How does that get decided? Well, she waits to the very last possible moment when she can start cooking something. And she goes to the refrigerator and goes, what can I make? And if she hasn't gotten to that point, I will step in to make it. She usually has some kind of plan. Is it a time? Yeah, it's usually around 5 o'clock. Okay, so if by 5, she has not done something, you go, I'll do it. I'll start opening doors really hard and heavy and doing the big side. I guess I got this. On me. Woods? Yes. What about Jamie? She used to be a lot better, but she works full time. And it's gotten to the point in my home that I do a lot of the grocery shopping. I do a lot of the cooking. I was cooking. Every night for a while, that stopped. Do you cook for her anymore at all? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. How often? Gosh, we've been so busy the last couple of weeks, but really before the last couple of weeks, I was cooking three or four days a week. Now you cook no days a week? No. Do you guys order out? Yeah, we'll order in, or last night I came home to a delicious, nutritious dinner. Nice. It was awesome. We walked in the door, it was on the plate. It was dynamite. The last two nights she's made dinner.
Lauren, when you get married, will you be a dinner maker? Probably. Probably maybe three nights a week. And what will happen the other four nights? Maybe we'll grill. When you say we, though. Hubby, we'll grill. Okay. Whoever that may be. And then maybe go out to eat one night and have the leftovers another night. That's my point. We're big on leftovers. Weird. Rebecca is a homemaker. And so she plans the meals out on Sunday. That's awesome. That is great. She shops on Monday and then she makes the dinners. It's incredible. That's great. I need to do that. There will be no dinner tonight though. But she gives me way advance notice. And so I know a week before. Once a month on a Wednesday night she doesn't. So tonight I'm on my own. What are we going to do?
What did you say? What are you going to do? I'm sure I'll eat something healthy. Really? Hmm. Anyway. The lettuce on the burger at McDonald's does not count. Does not count. As healthy. Nor do the pickles. Yesterday Woods called me. I can't believe you're telling this story. I'm not going to. No, please. You have to. You have to. I can't. You have to, you know. No, not that look from Sienna. Oh, you got to, dude. I can't with that look from Sienna. You got to tell it now. She knows. She knows. They all do. Who doesn't know? They all do. Where are you? And I said, where do you think I am? Let's just leave it there. All right, listen. I am giving you a fair warning right now. Everybody listening, I'm giving you a fair warning. When we come back, I'm going to tell you something that is very adult in nature. Oh, boy. It is. I can't wait. I'm just telling you. It's adult in nature. I'm only telling you that because this is an adult show and the show is geared towards dudes. And what I'm going to tell you is an adult natured thing. Oh, wow. It makes it worse. Jay. What did you call it earlier? A black hole of perversion? It's a black hole of perversion. You just get sucked into it. I can't wait. But I want to let people know that so that if you have people that you don't want to hear that, you might want to, you know, change the stage. On FM 94.9.
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slash healthyheart. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego, a Lincoln Financial radio station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I love that iPhone. It really is great. Lauren. I've taken a striptease class before. Woods. Yeah, that kid I'd like to be told what to do. Zienna. Why I keep the antibacterial hand gel in my purse at all times. And Jay. I'm going to open my beer right as we start. On FM 94.9. All right. I'm giving you notice so that nobody gets upset with me. I'm going to be telling a story that is adult in nature. Sienna, what's going on in news? Well, another escape from the Bronx Zoo. Not a cobra this time. It's a peacock. A female peacock, which is actually called a peahen, I've just learned. It's been on the loose since at least Monday, they're saying.
wandering the streets of the Bronx. It's been seen on cars at the subway stations. Tourists are like posing with it. Why don't they just get it? No one can catch it. Every time they get close to it or they get a sighting, you know, they go over and it flies up in the trees. Blow dart. Blow dart. They say usually they'll wander back on their own because they, you know, they do like the zoo. They get the food there. They're well taken care of. So they say. Also, pretty crazy. In Orange County, authorities are cracking down on parents of students who repeatedly script... Skip school. Mom. My mom is going to ditch all the time. Not ditch. Stay home. Five parents were just arrested yesterday on misdemeanor charges of contributing to the delinquency of a minor for allegedly letting their children cut class. Now, the school's saying they gave up multiple warnings, but there was, you know, kids that had like 30 absences. And the offense could be punishable up to a year in jail. Oh, my gosh. In jail. Oh, my gosh. And $2,500 in fines. Seems a little drastic. Yes, it does. A little excessive. Oh, man. Woods, what's going on in sports? Sports is brought to us today by Frank's Red Hot. Frank's Red Hot. I started in kind of a bummed way because the Padres lost again last night. 8-6 to the Milwaukee Brewers. Clayton Richard lost his fourth straight start. Padres are 0-2. This sucks. And are not playing the world's greatest baseball.
Everywhere I look online, it's rumors are rampant of the Heath Bell trade. I mean, there's scenarios already being presented of who we want, who we should get back. Please no. Gotta start winning some ball games, man. Come on. Resign that guy, man. He's as good as it gets here. I hate losing our greatest players. Yeah. Every year. I hate it. Every year, right? I watched Adrian Gonzalez last night hit two bombs, including a game-tying bomb in the ninth. They lost anyway, but it's just really, it's crazy to see that. Chad Ochocinco is turning into a, well, he is a walking bit, but he's turning into even more of a walking bit. He's got a new sport. What? You'll never guess. Curling. No. Weightlifting. Bull riding. That's not true. It's true. What is he really doing? He's bull riding. Oh, boy. You making that up? He accepted a challenge from professional bull rider's chief operating officer, Sean Gleason. And Sean said, hey, listen, he's a very talented athlete. We'd like to see him come out and ride a bull. And he said, oh, yeah, I'll do it. Yeah, $10,000 if he rides a bull and he gets to rename it. And he'll get a new Ford F-150. Yeah. Perfect fit. If he can stay on for eight seconds. If he can stay on, yeah. And so Chad Ochocinco will be riding a bull this weekend in Duluth. That's interesting.
Jay, to me it would be the opposite of fun. Whatever the opposite of fun is, is what that seems like to me. Do you know that they had a... Oh boy, you guys are going to have a field day with this one. They had a rodeo team at my high school. Oh wow. You were the captain? I stayed far away from those guys because they would beat me up. They had girls that rode bulls. Yesterday... I woke up from a nap. I turned my phone off, woke up from a nap, and got a message from my dad, and it sounded very serious. This is dad. Call when you get a chance. Nothing important. Sounds upset. Yeah, for sure. So I call him, and he says, I opened an email up that said that I had viruses on my computer. It said I had 83 viruses on my computer. And it was from the company that I have my antivirus with. And immediately in my head, I'm like, no, it wasn't. They say that that's what it is. But they have a fake bit. He says, and so I got very concerned and I started to go through this process. And then it wanted my credit card. Oh, boy. And he said, when it wanted my credit card, I started to think that maybe it was a scam. I said.
Well, it was, Dad. I said, but how far into it did you get? He said, well, I clicked on it a few different times and it wanted me to download a program, blah, blah, blah. Okay. He says, well, you got to know my dad. He's so serious. I'm getting these pop-ups that come on my screen of men doing oral sex to other men. He goes like this. He goes, he goes. It's disgusting. And I couldn't help it. I couldn't help it. I go, I go. It's your dad. It's my dad. So wait. So wait. So he goes. He goes. He goes. And your mother has her friend Irene from high school and her husband over. And I was showing them pictures on the computer. And a picture of one of these men with another man came on. And I clicked on it.
And I said, dang it, this keeps happening. And I can't stop it. And he said, and he said, and I know what they were thinking. They probably think that I look at some kind of weird sites. Oh, my gosh. He goes, no. Guess what he did? He took his computer to Apple. Oh, no. Oh, he was like, I'm getting to the bottom of this. Oh. He tells them this disgusting story. And they're like, yeah. I mean, you clicked on something. They're like, you just click off of it. He's like, I don't want. And as he's talking to me, he goes, oh, there's another one for Viagra. Like, I need that. Like, I need a hole in the head. Oh, my gosh. I need that. Like, I need a hole in the head. That's what he said. I need that. Like, I need a hole in the head. Oh, my gosh. And I'm like, I'm like.
You got to be kidding me. Where's your jaw? I mean, yes. I mean, beyond dropped open. I'm like, this is the greatest and the worst. It's the greatest and the worst. I feel bad, but I'm so glad. It's hysterical. It's awful. It's hysterical. I'm sad. I'm laughing. I'm sad. I'm laughing. My poor dad. My poor dad. And so he doesn't. Now, he kind of wanted to get a new Mac. But I'm concerned that if they transferred everything, all they do is transfer the right. Whatever. And I don't even know what that is. I don't know if it's a spyware or if it's I don't know what it is. Oh, man. I don't know what it is. And it's on his Mac. Yeah. And he said, well, I thought that Max couldn't get viruses. And I go, Dad, they don't get viruses. I said, but you have to do your part, too. He said, well, it said that it was from the company. Sweet man. I know. Sweet man. I know. I want to hug him. I do too. I wish he was here. I would try to console him. I'm like, Dad, anything on the computer, don't. Just don't. Like, if it says, if I write you an email, make sure you ask me where I was born. Yeah. It's a true story. My bank got me one time, or a scammer got me.
account was cleaned out in five minutes now they gave me my money back but i was like oh they're just verifying something done i mean they will get you on the internet if anybody knows what dad needs to do write me at mikey m-i-k-e-y at mikeyshow.com poor guy but and when i laughed he laughed but he said he can't get it out of his mind that these people thought that he was looking. That's the worst. Oh. Oh, boy. Like, okay, imagine an old, old friend coming to see your mom and they're like, oh, wow. And there's two dudes going at it on their computer. And it pops up. It's like, join now. Join now. And it's two guys worse. What if the friend goes, oh, this is a good one. And you're like, what? And you know people that don't understand computers are probably like, you know that stuff only comes up because he's been to that site. The only reason that came up is because you were looking at that porno site. Yes, you were looking at gaymen.com.
Listen, I've never bought Viagra either. That's coming up too. Dude. When that couple left your parents' house, guaranteed that's what they were talking about in the car. Guaranteed. They're staying there right now. Oh, no. They're staying with them. And so they're probably like, what kind of perversion? That was their pillow talk. What goes on in this house? It's a black hole of perversion. It's a black hole of perversion. They didn't sleep a wink last night. They just, they laid there with a cover. Yeah. And a flashlight. And a flashlight. And a flashlight. And a can of mace. Right. A can of mace. Hey, everybody. We're all going to get laid. And a rape whistle. They stare at the doorknob all night. What was that? What was that? He's got it again. I bet he's in there looking at those dirty pictures. He goes. Mike, there was a picture of a man and another man. It was disgusting. And I mean, I just I couldn't even I just go. You have to. I mean, you just what are you going to do? What are you going to do? That's incredible. Poor guy. And I called him this morning and I said, hey, dad, can I tell that story and see if I can get people to help out? He said, yes.
Miguel. We don't think you're a sex pervert. Yes. We're not. You're not a creepy. We know you're not. You're not closeted or anything. Miguel. Miguel. Poor guy. He just, when it comes to that computer, he doesn't get it. I have been with you when I first moved to town. You had to install a program. And we were over there and his dad was. Firing questions at Mike. And he was writing it all down. Writing everything down. Yeah, he really wants to learn. My dad desperately tries to figure out how to make a playlist on iTunes. And he's asked me three times. And I tell him. I'll write it down for him. Dude, I have. And he'll follow the direction. Me good. Me good. No, not fast like that. Okay. Me good. Me good. Yeah. I tried to. Playlist thing. And I can't make it work. The plus sign doesn't work. Such a sweetheart. I know. I love him so much. Anytime you tell a story about your dad, I want to cry. I know. Me too. He's the best. He's so sweet. Nurse. Nurse. He's the best. Naughty nurse. Oh. Male nurse. Poor guy. Oh, I love him. But if anybody knows how to.
Mikey at MikeyShow.com. Oh, that poor guy. Please. Help him. Let's see. My name's Mikey. I'm the host of the show. I'm 40. Woodsy's our sports guy. He's 35. Lauren O'Brien is 30. She's our assistant producer and comedian. Sienna is our news girl. She's 26. Jay is our producer. He is 47. And Chris. Screens phones for us. He's 22. It's cross. Let's see. So you've heard our OSI promo. We run it a ton because we really want people to get out there and watch and be a part of OSI Operation Street Impact. You've heard this. San Diego Radio has never mobilized this type of takeover. That guy got an incredible voice, right? The prices are huge. Okay. Now, what you maybe don't know. is that we did do some auditions for that voice. Got to get the perfect one. Got to get the perfect one. We wanted to play you some of the people that didn't make the cut because that dude is awesome. So here's some of the people that did not make the cut. All right. Come on up. What's your name, please?
Bryce Taurus. All right, Bryce. You're going to be reading the OSI promo for The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. And I just want you to know that this is a promo for a big event called Operation Street Impact. Yes. All right. So we need you to be, you know, what we're looking for here is a very serious, almost ominous and motion picture type sound. Got it. All right. From the top. San Diego Radio has never mobilized this type of takeover. Cut. Was it too much? Here's what I want you to scale it down a little. Let me give you the direction, okay? Okay. What we're looking for is ominous. Okay. All right? And you sound more happy. Okay. San Diego Radio has never mobilized this type of takeover. Cut. Bryce, it's... Okay, let me try to explain this again. That was better, okay? But the deal is that you are sounding still, I need you to deepen your voice. Okay, I got it. San Diego Radio has never mobilized this type of takeover. The prizes are huge. O-S-I. Stop. Cut. You're putting too much of an emphasis on the S's. Okay, let me try it again. O-S-I.
Okay, on the S there. I'll try it again. O, S, I. Okay, on the S, I'm hearing too much sss. I think you're not Scorsese. I think if you just let me get through it, I think we'd be fine. I'd rather not argue with you, Bryce, so. O, S, I. First of all, I wasn't rolling. Second of all, you're doing the same exact thing you did the last time I told you. The S is too pronounced, okay? I'm not looking for S. I'm done. I'm done. All right. Thank you, Bryce. What's your name, miss? What's your name? Hi. Judy Douche. All right, Judy. You're going to be reading for the OSI promo today for the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. The idea here is that we're looking for a big-sounding motion picture-type voice, okay? All right. Can I just do one vocal warm-up before I begin? Sure. Okay. Unique, you New York, you. You didn't get that. Unique. Okay, I'm just going to go. Okay. Okay. Go ahead. Oh, okay. San Diego radio has never mobilized this time. Stop. Cut. What? I need you to be bigger than long. Everything all right? What is that? Sorry, I was just, I get a little nervous. What is that noise? Can you turn your cell phone off, please?
Sorry. Miss Douche, can you turn your cell phone off, please? Actually, it's off. I just get a little bit nervous. I get a tick. I can start over. What's the noise? What is that? That's my throat. That's you making that noise? Yeah. Okay, let's take it from the top. Okay, go? Yes. San Diego Radio has never mobilized this type of takeover. Cut. Okay, let's pretend that you're on the radio, and this time read it with some gusto, like you're... In a motion picture movie trailer. Action. San Diego Radio has never mobilized. Miss Douche? Yes. Have you ever done voiceover work before, or is this your first time trying voiceover work? I'm on a morning radio show, actually. Which one? The Mikey Show. Okay, that's the one you're auditioning for, so. Oh, yeah. From the top. Action. From the top, Miss Douche. Uh-oh. Miss Douche.
Uh-oh. Are you okay? Uh-oh. All right. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. All right. Thanks. That's enough. John, I'm going to take a break. You look like you need a break. I'll take over. Jay Isbell. Jay Isbell, step to the mic, please. Yes, sir. Say your name and what you do. Jason R. Isbell. We're on the top. You know what we're doing here. Yes. It's the new promo for the new Mikey Show sticker we're going to be doing. So here we go. Action. San Diego Radio has never mobilized this type of takeover. Cut. Yes. That's mobilized. That's the way you say it? That's the way it's said. That's the way that English people say it. All right. San Diego Radio has never. No, don't say it like an English person. Read it as it says there in your normal inflection, with your normal inflection, normal accent. Okay. Action. Hey, y'all. This is Jay Isbell for San Diego Radio. Has never mobilized this type of takeover. Cut. Shut up. You want me to just, how about if I go down a little bit? I'm not very good. That line doesn't suit me. What if I did a line that suits me better? Okay, just try a line. I want to make sure we get the levels right. Do a line that suits you. On Saturday, May 14.
The Mikey Show, M1s, take over Qualcomm Stadium. Hep, hep, hep. Oh, Jay. Jason. Jason R. Isabel. Oh, man. Oh, man. If you haven't heard the news about Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger. There's something happening with that we want to tell you about. We will check in with Judy Douche, otherwise known as Eskimo Blue Waters, in just a moment. Hang on. Now's our chance. Let's do it. More from the Mikey Show coming up. Be a part of the show. I don't think it's that simple. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm beginning to like the sound of that.
It's almost here, and it will sell out in advance. FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Presented by Miller Lite. Sunday, June 5th at the Oceanside Pier Amphitheater. Ten great artists on two stages and one wandering ombre playing swampy, heavy-sounding blues. No additional fees. As always, $1 of every ticket sold will go to the About the Music Fund, which helps to support music education in San Diego County Public Schools. Tickets are on sale now, but they're going fast. Purchase them online at independencejam.com or at fm949sd.com. FM 94.9 Independence Jam. Coastal Invasion. Presented by Triple Hops Brewed Miller Lite. Taste greatness. Independence Jam is also supported by Grubbies and Los Tacos. See you on Sunday, June 5th in Oceanside.
Nurse means noble. Nurse means selfless. Mothers nurse their children. You nurse someone back to health. If there were ever a group of people more on the give side of the give-take continuum, it would be news to us. I mean, why does one become a nurse? Because working 8 at night to 10 in the morning is so appealing? Because the glamour of day-to-day encounters with a wide variety of bodily fluids is too much to resist? Nurses are nurses because their capacity to care is colossal. There's sympathy, superhuman. Even when you try to act all steely and business-like, you can't fool us. We still see the love in the tough. We can still hear that gargantuan heart all squishy with compassion thumping away. So while too often you yield the spotlight for just this moment, we're asking all the nurses out there to do what clearly doesn't come natural and take a bow. Kaiser Permanente. May our 45,000 nurses all live long and thrive. Hey, gang. It's your old pal, Woodsy, here for Clearview Eye and Laser Medical Center. When you're selecting a doctor for a surgery on your eyes, it can be pretty tricky. So you want to make sure you pick the right one. I know that I did. I picked Dr. Sandy T. Feldman at Clearview Eye and Laser Medical Center because I felt really confident when I met them.
man, they know what they are doing. Everything in there is state-of-the-art. The office is incredible. They will take such good care of you in there. Give them a call today, 858-452-3937. Go in, you get a free consultation. They're going to look at you and they're going to tell you whether or not you're a good candidate. Luckily for me, I was. Now I can see so great. Talking to LOB, she's thinking about doing it. Now is the time, man. Going surfing, playing baseball, doing all the things that you like to do outside. without glasses or contacts. It's very freeing, if you know what I mean. Call them today, 858-452-3937, or check them out online, www.clearvieweyes.com. Live from Progressive. First caller. Hi, I just broke up with my boyfriend. I think you called the wrong number, but Progressive.com lets you compare our rates with our competitors. So there are other fish in the sea. Really? Yeah, you'll find someone. No, you can really compare rates at Progressive.com? Wow, you got over that quickly. Visit Progressive.com to compare rates and start saving today. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and its affiliates Mayfield Village, Ohio. Prices vary based on how you buy. Comparison rates not available in all states or situations. Live from Progressive.
Flo here, let's take another question. Hi, Flo. I saved a ton of money with Progressive's discounts. Great, but that's not really a question. Oh, you're right. I saved a ton of money with Progressive's discounts? Still not quite right, but you get the idea. Progressive makes it easy to save. Right. Discounts for safe driving, owning a home, and more. Now that's Progressive. Call or click today. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and its affiliates Mayfield Village, Ohio. Prices vary based on how you buy. Discounts not available in all states or situations. Dude, what happened last night? I can't find my Super Big Gulp cup. What? You mean the one showing the guy from The Hangover Part 2? We have to find that cup. All right, let's retrace our steps. Okay, well, we started at 7-Eleven. But what happened after that? Hey, I think we got kidnapped by a bachelorette party. Oh, yeah, and they made us get tattoos of the bride's name. That explains who Lois is. Hey, why does mine say Antonio? Ah, mi amigos. No way, he's the dancer who rescued us. Oh, right, and he got us into that killer party at the mansion. Wait, didn't you get into a fight there with someone's pet monkey? Yeah, I hate that monkey. Hey, he stole the cub.
Only at 7-Eleven. Collect all five and be sure to check out the movie, The Hangover Part 2, in theaters May 26th. Looking for a great lunch deal in the neighborhood? One with tons of choices and endless refills? Then come check out Applebee's new all-you-can-eat soup salad and bread for just $6.99. You heard right, never-ending refills of our piping hot, hearty soups, fresh salads, and warm garlic ciabatta bread. Try as many as you like and eat as much as you like. The possibilities are endless. Go for a classic Caesar salad with French onion soup, then switch it up with a... And for just a little more, you can step it up to one of Applebee's signature salads, like our Oriental chicken salad or grilled shrimp and spinach salad. There's no better lunch deal in the neighborhood, so come eat lunch with us. It's all you can eat and only $6.99. Only at Applebee's.
Applebee's all-you-can-eat lunch available Monday through Friday till 3 p.m. and join the late-night party at Applebee's where you'll find the best happy hour in town. Starting at 9 p.m., $3 domestic Brutus drafts, under $5 appetizers, nightly drink specials, and lots of fun. Now open till midnight or later every night. Hey, this is Mikey. A few weeks ago you heard New York Mike on my show and he was talking about this Saturday, May 14th. There's going to be a blessing of the bikes on Mount Soledad. Now, New York Mike and a ton of people are meeting at San Diego Harley-Davidson off the 163 in Claremont Mesa Boulevard at 9 a.m. to ride up to Mount Soledad for a 10 a.m. blessing of the bikes. And if you don't own a motorcycle, you can drive your car, your truck, or your bicycle up there. Just help New York Mike and his friends support the Mount Soledad Cross just by showing up. They're going to be blessing the riders and those that have died so that we can ride and live free lives. It's a Mount Soledad memorial. It's a perfect place to be thankful to God and the warriors who protect us all. And right now, that means more than anything. And after you roll by my OSI event, the big Operation Street Impact event at Qualcomm, you can head up to San Diego Harley-Davidson. There's going to be an after-party until 3 o'clock in the afternoon, and Woods and LOB are going to be there. They're going to be hanging with barbecue and the bands and giving away tons of prizes. San Diego Harley-Davidson.
Right off the 163 on Claremont Mesa Boulevard. And if you want more information, just go to sandiegoharley.com. Welcome to San Diego's very own Mission Federal Credit Union. Financial health for life. Mission Fed offers better rates, fee-free ATMs nationwide, and personalized service. Just walk into one of over 20 Mission Fed branches right here in San Diego or go to missionfed.com. With the new Turtle Reef attraction and Shamusha opening this summer, there's never been a better time to get a SeaWorld Fun Card. Pay for a day, play all year. This report brought to you by the San Diego County Visitors Bureau. Embrace the Wild West during the annual Ramona Rodeo, May 21st through the 22nd. For more East County adventures, visit sandiego.org slash East County. On the 125 northbound ramp to the 8 westbound, an accident. It's got that left lane blocked. It's on the transition to northbound 125 to westbound 8. 78 westbound Woodland Parkway, the left lane's blocked. You have a backup to Oak Hill Drive. Cars are dodging a big roll of carpet that's in the middle of the lanes.
Box truck stalled on the 5 northbound of 28th Street blocking that left lane. This report brought to you by Wawanese Insurance. With Wawanese's recent change in car rates, many San Diego good drivers could save even more by switching. Wow. Call 877-WA-WANESA. Go to WawaneseUS.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Good morning to you. This is Bird from Bird's Earth Shed with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf 440 Wednesday morning. Brought to you by Joe Roper's Surfboard Repair. Today, under part of the cloudy skies, we've got some surf out there still. Remnant northwest for the windy ground. Small is the primary source of energy. Some secondary southwest showing at the same time, too. Pretty small, though, across the board. Running in that need-of-waist-high zone. Up the chest-high at standout spots. Coming off of that low tide, or just about at that low tide, I should say. So that is further hurting sizes and shape at all areas. Look for some improvement as the day continues. You should see some more sunshine at that same time as well. Right now, winds are pretty light and variable, relatively clean surface conditions. Looks like they'll turn more westerly as the day continues, too. And all in all, small, but a little bit cleaner maybe than yesterday, too. So there's some rideable waves. For up to 30-minute surf report forecasts, go to surfline.com. For surfboard restoration and repair needs, you go see Joe Roper. Your surf report can only be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9.
This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm a right-wing NRA guy. Lauren. Yes, I'm gullible. We get it. No, we don't. Give me a break. Woods. No, I don't play online because why? I don't like to play other people. Why? Because I'm selfish. Sienna. You know, I really don't even know what color my hair is. It's like brown, red. There's a little bit of blonde. It changes. And Jay. You didn't use nails when you made that treehouse? Yeah, I didn't want to hurt the tree with nails going in. On FM 94.9. That's what I loved about the 80s and 90s in rock. It was so deep. Oh, it meant something. It really meant something. It was heartfelt. Oh, did they look like dorks, man. Oh, big time. I'm looking at it. Oh, wow. About a 12-string guitar, too. There sure was. Oh, man. Our Independence Jam.
It's coming up. FM 94.9's Independence Jam out at Oceanside Pier. The damn Yankees will not be there. They will not be there. But in their place, Cold War Kids, Leaky Lee, Peter Bjorn and John, Band of Skulls and Everest. Just to name a few. Silent Comedy will be there. The Soft Pack will be there. It's going to be really good and tickets are available. However, not for long. Not for long. They got a ticket count yesterday and it is low. Really? Yeah, there's not very many tickets left. In fact, it's below 500 tickets. Wow. Yeah. It's going to sell out fast. It may sell out by the end of the day, and we don't want you to miss out on it. We're going to be giving away some tickets to it, by the way, at OSI. Still giving away tickets out at San Diego Harley-Davidson. So you can stop by there and put your name in the hopper. Say hello to Trish.
Bring on the big one. Okay, well, her boyfriend probably just is, you know, he probably clenched up a little bit right there. Chances he's big and strong. Hope I never meet him. Now, how are you, sir? My name is Steve Woods. That's Jay over there in the beanie cap. A fat guy. The chubby guy over there is Jay. The short chubby guy, the brown one. No hair? There's Jay. Old Fat Jay we call him. Old Fat Jay. Old Fat Jay. Old Fat Jay. That's right, didn't he? That's Old Fat Jay is what we call him. 570-1949 is our phone number. The word of the day is camel. I haven't said it yet. And when I say it, you've got to be calling nine to get a four-pack of tickets to SeaWorld and also lunch for two at On the Border. Let's count.
Just because I... Yes, just because. I love you. I will count with dings. So let the dings do the counting. Count how many times Maria Shriver refers to the word transition. Like a lot of you, I'm in transition. What are you doing next? What are you going to do? What have you come up with? Oh, I hope you're getting time to relax and think and take a break. It is so stressful to not know what you're doing next. When people ask you, what are you doing? And then they can't believe that you don't know what you're doing. And then every idea you have, you think, well, I shouldn't do that. So I thought to myself, I'll ask you guys, how do you think you can really have an impact in 2011 in the world? the world seems to be blowing up and i'd like to hear from other people who are in transition how did you find your transition personal professional emotional spiritual financial how'd you get through it what were the three things that enabled you to get through your transition what did you after you transitioned what do you wish you would have known i wrote a book a long time ago 10 things i wish i would have known before i went out into the real world tell me some things
You wish you would have known before you transitioned. I think it would have helped me. I think she wants to transition. Something about a transition in there. Can I ask you a question? Yeah. Was that all spliced together, audio? Or was that one long question? One long question. Because she asked about a hundred questions. One long question. No wonder she's single. Oh, wow. Wow, wood. Sorry. Oh, boy. Scarecrow. He really went below the belt on that. Well. No wonder he's like, I've got to get out of here. She's dealing with definitely a genius on the other end, too. Fair enough. I ran a state. What did you do? Fair enough. Hey, Maria. Why don't you give me a break already, all right? I'm just trying to transition. Spit the question out. Can you transition between kindergarten cop and Terminator? I did. Seamlessly? I did transition seamlessly. You're the same person in every movie. You just wear a different costume. Nice transition. Fair enough. Okay. Yeah. Same accent. Maybe try to change it. Try to drop it. How long have you lived here? I've lived here for 25 years. Yeah, nice transition. Maybe you just asked the question instead of taking two and a half minutes to say one thing. I still don't know what you want to know. I haven't even started my question. You started at the beginning of my first term. I'm trying to transition from a declaration to an interactive. This is the ringing in my head. Always. Arnold, that's what I said. It's no wonder. And Mikey jumped right down your throat. I know. Now I'm with you.
I think you're right. Yeah, I know I'm right. This is the buzzing in my head all the time. Yeah. Yeah. Try making love to that, okay? Yeah, I have. Yeah. I'm talking about you. Yeah. Kindergarten cap. Yeah. Well, let me tell you something. Twins. Twins watcher. Yeah. That was a great flick. Yeah, it was. Great flick. True romance. How about that one? I've never even seen that. You weren't in true romance. Arnold. Are you sure? I'm positive. Oh, oops. My bad. This is exactly what I'm talking about. I meant true lies. Maria, now I think I agree with you. Now I'm on Criterion Edition. Grunting and bragging about movies he wasn't in. You can get it today on Amazon.com. Criterion Edition. Blu-ray and also standard. Screw you. You're going to sign it for them? You sign everything. People don't ask you to sign anything. You know what I'd like to sign? Separation papers. You can't stop when you're talking. All right, I'll give you some transition papers. I hear this in my head. I'm taking a shower, trying to listen to Austrian music. Guess what I hear? Maria Shriver talking for 45 minutes in my head. I'm with you, Arnold. Here's something that I wish you could say. Nice transition. Can I talk out of school? If you must. Too late.
It's not too late. I'm just not going to look at her. I'm just going to say it. Oh, wow. Sienna told us that she popped a zit. Oh, that one. Really? Is she mad? She's not mad. She's smiling. Are you smiling? She's a little red. She's red. Well, because it has to do with my husband. Well, he's playing golf today, so... Yeah. He won't hear her. Sienna popped a zit on her husband's butt. Disgusting. Gross. Sounds fun. Fun! It's a safety hazard. No. I... I'm all about popping zips on his face or his back. Yeah. But something about the butt was really difficult to do. That's unbelievable. It was. It was skeevy, right? Didn't you say it was more of a boil? I think it was infected. Oh. Oh, my God. I'm going to throw up right now. Does anybody want the rest of the oatmeal? I've got some cottage cheese in here if anybody wants to. Oh, my. He has a nice butt. Yeah, he does.
He came home from work. And then Jay smiles at me like, ha, ha, ha. How about that one, Mike? Based on that one. What are you going to do with that? Now what are you going to do? Now where are you going to go? I just did, like, not only did I do a black hole of perversion, now I'm doing gay black holes of perversion. What do you think now, Mike? Testimony, we're out or what? Well, Todd is like woods, and he really doesn't have a filter. He tells me everything, the things I don't want to know. And he came home from work and was complaining that it hurt to sit down. Stay away from the crack. That he had this zit on his butt, and he said, you need to look at it. And so I was like, all right. I didn't have a problem with looking at it. But he's like, babe, you have to get in there. I'm like, oh. You have to get in there. I think that was a direct quote. I would die to get in there. Lauren, this is a married woman and your friend. And she's married to that man. Oh, babe. That is the filthiest, most awful thing to talk.
As I use my lips. Okay, that crossed a line. Oh, you're over the line. That crossed a line with Sienna's husband, Todd. Yes. Sign me up for that. No! You can't sign up. You can't have it. You can't. What, L.O.B.? I'm never going to have to shave. Oh, my God. Lauren, you're being really inappropriate. That is so inappropriate. This is a married man we're talking about. He's the father of my child. Okay. Good point. You're not going to robot your way out of this one. Do you want me to describe the scene? No, no, no. This is what I want to ask you. Not describe the zit. Describe the scene. Jay. Excuse me? I'm going to ask you to not do that. So did you do this with fingers or... Your toes. Jay. Sorry. I'm just... If I can, if I could just ask you for a moment. Oh, boy. Get me out. Get me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. Nails or fingers?
Well, I always try to use my fingers, but he says I use too much nail. So does Rebecca. He gets really mad about it. But he came home and I was in the kitchen and I was like, fine, let me see this thing. So I see it. I'm like, ooh, I think it's infected. It was really red and red all around it. And I was like, oh, gosh. This is the worst thing I've ever heard. Yeah, it's up there. It's the greatest. One of my greatest. And so I was like. I'll do it because I love you that much. The things you do for love, I swear. Did it have a white handle? No, it was all red. And I said, I don't know if I can pop it. He said, just try. It wasn't ready. And guys are wimps. Woods, I beg you to not comment on this thing anymore. Mike, it wasn't ready, dude. You're making it worse. Guys are wimps when it comes to the zip pop. Oh, yeah. Oh, my gosh. So he's leaned over and his hands are on the sink in the kitchen. And he's bent over. Like, this is... I wish that the people staying with my parents walked in right there. And Sage is already asleep. This is like, all right, let's focus. And so I got down, squatted down. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, wow. And I pursued to pop, tried to pop. And it wouldn't go? It oozed. Yes! It oozed, but not the good kind of ooze where it's like white.
pops out, it was like, something's wrong with this thing. That's it, dude. What you're saying is that it wasn't satisfying. It was not satisfying. And he was in pain and he was screaming. Ow. Did he curse? He's like, ow, you're crying. And I'm like, babe, I'm popping your butts in. Shut up. Isolate. Yes. Miss Farrar, we're reading from the transcript here and it says, babe, Comma, I'm popping your butt zit. Leave me alone. Shut up. Shut up. Do you care to describe for Congress here? Congress. For the good senator, what you meant by that. Yeah, my wife is in charge of this, too. Call us, 570-1949. My wife's in charge of this.
And takes great delight like Lauren does. Like Sienna does. And I do the same thing Todd does. I over direct. And I don't like too much nail. I can't help it. And I tell her. The nails already. Enough with the nails. Enough with the nails. After I do that with too many nails, Matt, I think, wants to punch me, but he knows that he can't do that, so he will punch a pillow really, really hard. Punch something. Gotta punch something. And I always feel like she's stalling the process. I'm like, just do it. Get in there. Go. Do it. And she's like, well, I don't want to. And I'm like, really, doctor? Easy, surgeon general. Just get in there. Hey, see Everett Coop. Just pop it. Hey, House, pop my sit, okay? Right now, all right? Put your cane down and pop my sit. Hey, Marcus Welby, just get it over with, all right? Hey, Doogie Howser, I know you graduated early, but... Hurry it up, McDreamy. Yeah, come on, McDreamy. Get in there. Just get it over with. Oh, man. 570-1949. This is M1 Greg from San Diego. Go ahead, Greg. Hey, I got a story.
I'm so sorry, Todd. I'm like, okay, honey, okay. Too much nail. Been there, done that. I'm like, honey, gosh, it hurts so bad. And she's like, oh, your back's looking good this time. I don't have to pop any. I'm like, great, great. Yeah, they get disappointed. Oh, it's so disappointing. Yeah, this is kind of a deviation on it, but a little bit similar. So anyways, I had a problem with one of my ears. I'm like, I can't hear out of it. I can't hear out of it. My wife's in nursing school. And so through time, she was like, oh, I got this really good pen light. Let me look in your ear. So she looked in my ear. Oh, wow. Oh. Oh.
Oh, oh, oh, oh. And it gets better. I'm like, holy cow, this thing's hard. And all of a sudden I can hear. I'm like, this is crazy stuff. But it gets even funnier. Oh, yeah, it's hysterical. I love it. It's like a dimple of your wax. Now, this is just my ear. She tells me about a friend of hers, another nurse, and she went to the doctor to get the thing removed. Now, when she went to the doctor, she had the thing removed. She asked the doctor if she could keep it. The doctor was like, are you... And she goes, oh, no, I wasn't serious. What kind of koala bear ears do you... I need to see a picture. Can I come over? What sort of bat boy... What sort of... What was going on in your ear? That's exactly... I have no clue. I don't know. I clean it with Q-tips and... Maybe mix a Q-tip in every once in a while, bro. I have no clue. She said, don't use Q-tips ever again. Let me clean it. I'm like, what are you going to clean it with? She's like, I'll use this hairpin. Safety pin. Yeah, I'm like, oh, please. Gosh, I'm like fearful that she's going to damage my eardrum. Oh, my gosh. I would love to do that. Thank you, Greg. Thank you. Will you clean my ears? I think I can only do it to Matt. You can only do it to a lover. Yes.
That is not the kind of operation that can take place with a friend. Or a child. If I had any kids, I would love to do that. I use my fingernail in Sage's ear. Oh my gosh. Without hesitation. I can't wait. That's reason alone to become a mom. Whenever I see snot on my kid's nose, I want to barf. Really? My own kid's snot grosses me out. to no end. That's why you're not a mom, dude. Moms don't care. I just reach up there and grab it. Then I use it for oil in my car. I'm the perfect dad, Mike. Unlike you. I like my kids. You don't. Women can only pop zits from a lover. It is not something that you can do with a friend. Right. Now, if you're a friend and a lover, that may be different. But I'm still saying it's weird. I've never asked a friend of mine that's a girl to pop anything. Yeah, no. I don't want them to see that side of me. But my wife, she's stuck.
It's what she signed up for, really. She can't get out. It should be in the vows. She can't get out of it. If I have that, you must deal with it because what are you going to do? Right. Run screaming. If I'm with you, Mike, I would. I'd just like to put a personal message out to Rebecca. I'm here. And I ain't like that. You know what sinew is? That's me. I'm all sinew. You know what I look like? I look like a skinned deer naked. You know what polygamy is? Come on over. You ever heard of a key party, Rebecca? Only one key in there and it says Rebecca's. Why don't you drop the zero and get with the hero? Goes to my bedroom. You gotta sort the key unlocks. Bedroom door. Or the key to my heart. Wiener time. Spit oatmeal everywhere we're laughing.
everywhere you mean my arm. There's a piece of woods oatmeal sticking to my arm right now. And it came from his mouth or his nose. And it flew across this board and it landed on my arm where it still is. It's still there. I couldn't see it. I got more if you want. Something only a lover could do. Don't lick it. Yes. Mike, don't try to eat it. I know you're hungry. I can tell. Today ends in wine, right? That's right. Mikey's hungry. I thought I'd heard it all. I thought I had heard it all. But when we come back, I'm going to tell you something that's going on at Rancho Buena Vista High School that to me was shocking. But maybe you won't think it's shocking.
This is something that the guys do and the girls are okay with. And we'll tell you what it is next. Happens this Friday night at 4th and B. Saturday night, Urge Overkill are going to be at the Casbah. And then some good shows in town next weekend. Aloe Black at the Belly Up on May 20th. And System of a Down at Cricket Wireless May 21st.
On the 27th, you can see Transfer at the CASBA. Cage the Elephant and Manchester Orchestra hit SOMA on June 1st. And June 5th, it's the FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. That's at Oceanside Pier with now 11 acts. FM 949SD.com or IndependenceJam.com to get your tickets. Matt and Kim in the Thermals are at House of Blues June 16th. A Perfect Circle plays the open air theater July 26th. FM 94.9's Big Sonic Chill presents Sia at House of Blues August 11th. Def Cap for Cuties at the Remax August 16th. And you can see Kings of Leon and Band of Horses at Cricket Wireless September 4th. So there you have it. Get out there and see some shows. The FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar can be heard four times daily. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar at FM949SD.com. Tired of credit cards that don't really reward you? Stop. Now there's the knock your socks off credit card. The card that lets you redeem points for socks, tubes, knee highs, argyles. You name it, just 10,000 points a pair. Are you tired of your points being pointless? Hey, what do you mean? Who doesn't like socks? Yeah, but with U.S. Bank Flex Perks reward cards, points go farther.
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Tomorrow, I'll be putting another oven gold turkey sandwich in the fridge. I know it's hard to resist. Perhaps your mother never gave you good turkey as a child. I feel for you. But if you ever touch my slow-roasted boar's head oven gold again, I swear I will hunt you down and teach you a whole new meaning to lunch break. Have a great day. A great sandwich needs protecting. Boar's head oven gold turkey. Compromise elsewhere. Try a slice of Boar's Head premium deli meats and cheeses in select supermarkets, gourmet stores, and fine eateries. Make your weekends even hotter at SeaWorld with Viva La Musica, now through May 22nd. This fiery festival celebrating Hispanic heritage is back with savory authentic cuisine, local entertainment, and performances from today's hottest international Latin artists live at Cirque Stadium. This weekend, catch Bella Nova on Saturday, May 14th, and Fonseca on Sunday, May 15th. Then next weekend, don't miss Prince Royce on May 21st and El Gran Combo on May 22nd. Enjoy every weekend of Viva la Musica along with all your favorite SeaWorld rides, shows, and annual encounters with a fun card. Pay for a day, play all year.
The fun continues this weekend with Viva La Musica at SeaWorld. For showtimes or to buy your fun card, visit SeaWorld.com slash Viva. Concert seating is limited. Entertainment subject to Chains Without Notice. Event included with park admission. Restrictions apply. This spring, refresh the way you do wireless with Cricut. Connect to friends and family more than ever with our incredible line of stylish new Android-powered smartphones with refreshingly affordable rate plans. They'll put you just one touch away from social networks, email, and more. Plus, for a limited time, you'll save up to $50 after mail and reward card. That's wireless the Cricut way. Smartphone plans with nationwide unlimited talk, text, web and 3G data for just $55 a month without contracts. So hurry up and get the most of your spring by switching to Cricut. Visit your Cricut store or mycricut.com today and rediscover value while supplies last.
So smart, so Cricut. Data usage is subject to Cricut's fair use policy. Coverage not available everywhere. Terms and restrictions apply. Cricut needs of prepaid cards are issued by Medibank. Android is a trademark of Google Incorporated. Come in today and check out Cricut's all-new LG Optimus C. It's a fully loaded Android 2.2 for just $149.99 after $50 mail and reward card. Hurry while supplies last. So smart, so Cricut. Live from Progressive. Flow here. With more discounts than ever before, Progressive can save you a lot of money on your car insurance. Savings. You can get bigger savings than that. Savings. That's close, but you can really save a lot of money. You're going to need some savings. Savings. Much better. Discounts for safe driving, owning a home, and more. Now that's Progressive. Call or click today. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and its affiliates. Mayfield Village, Ohio. Prices vary based on how you buy. Discounts not available in all states or situations. Live from Progressive. Next caller. Hey, Flo. So how much money can I save by switching to Progressive? People who switch save an average of $500 with more discounts than ever. Like the safe driver discount. Cha-ching! Homeowner's discount. Cha-ching! Pay in full discount. Cha-ching! Okay, he gets it. Getting you all the discounts you deserve. Now that's Progressive. Call or click today. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and its affiliates. Mayfield Village, Ohio. Average annual savings from 2010 National Survey of new customers who save with Progressive. Prices vary based on how you buy. Discounts not available in all states or situations.
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Well, it looks like the 125 northbound ramp to the 8 westbound in accident still has that left lane blocked. On the 805 northbound between Logan Avenue, some road construction there closing that left lane. Starts at 9 a.m. today. It'll be until 2.30 this afternoon. Also, the 78 westbound Woodland Parkway, the left lane's blocked. You have a backup to Citrus Avenue. This report also brought to you by Farmers Insurance. Don't have a Farmers Insurance agent? Well, you may not be saving as much as you could. Farmers has dozens of discounts, could save you hundreds of... Just call Farmers agent Joseph Giamacco at 858-513-0005 and start saving. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZC San Diego, Lincoln Financial Radio Station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. Because I'm tiny. Lauren. I like fried chicken. Woods. I am real talented, but I'm not stupid. Sienna. Every time I go to the grocery store, I know someone practically in every aisle. And Jay. I could teach you how to do it in five minutes. On FM 94.9. never be able to name the movie this season. I love the sound. It's wild and hard. You're so far off that there cannot even be words for how far off you are. This song was on the soundtrack to Terminator 2, Judgment Day. It's the scene where the Terminator walks into the honky-tonk
And breaks the, gets a pool stick broken over his back. And he picks the guy up and he throws him into the kitchen and he lands on the hot griddle. Do you remember that? No. I only saw it once years ago. Character. That's right. I can't believe you could remember that. Are you talking, are you talking to me? Yes. I'm talking to myself. You can't remember where you parked your car. He's got no short term. It's all long term. Just the long term. That's all I've got left. I'll get you. I can't believe you'd remember that, Mac. Oh, Blankhead is what I call you. How you doing, Blankhead? Forgetful Susan. Hey, there's Memory Mikey walking around like a dummy. Hey, Memento. Hey, Memento. Memento Mikey is what we call you. Somebody helping.
Somebody called me that, Memento J. I was like, uh-uh, he's Memento Mikey. That's right. Remember? Sienna, what's going on in news? Well, two days ago, it was reported that the U.S. Navy would be allowing its chaplains to perform gay marriages once the repeal of the Don't Ask, Don't Tell goes into effect. Well, yesterday, they changed their mind. The decision was reversed. And some House lawmakers had a problem with it. They said that allowing chaplains to perform gay marriage would violate the 1996 Federal Defense of Marriage Act, which defines marriage only as being between a man and a woman. So there's going to be some more thorough legal reviews. Also, yesterday, the police chief, William Lansdowne, apologized on behalf of his department over the last few months, especially the last three months. A lot of officers here in San Diego County especially have been getting in trouble for... A few things. Drinking and driving, sexual assault, stalking female employees. I mean, hit and runs. There's been a bunch of things. So he said that they're going to be going through a lot of training programs and other exercises to get the San Diego Police Department back on track. Well, I don't think that that is indicative of the San Diego Police Department. I think there's a few bad apples.
Yeah, nine cases total in the last three months, five of which have resulted in arrests of the officers. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, Tampa Bay Buccaneers defensive end Alex McGee was arrested on charges of marijuana. And I mention it because he is one of about 13 players to be arrested since the lockout started. Time to get these dudes back to work. Put that in your pipe and smoke it. Yeah, put that in your pipe and smoke it. I mentioned yesterday Chargers linebacker Antoine Applewhite was arrested for DUI. But, man, there have been a rash of different charges from robbery. Oh, chicken, chicken, yeah. Yeah, a lot of getting their drinks on and driving, a lot of pot possession. I mean, these guys, they're kind of guys with nowhere to go at this point. They're bored. So they're getting in trouble. They're bored, yeah. Idle hands, right? Yeah. Also, speaking of idle hands. Albert Hainsworth has pleaded not guilty to groping a waitress at the W Hotel in Washington, D.C. He is going to fight the charges. The sexual abuse charge carries a maximum penalty of six months in jail and a fine of up to $1,000. Oh, boy. He's going to fight it. Says he has witnesses. So we'll see how it ends. So something going on at Rancho Buena Vista High School. Now, this may not be specific to Rancho Buena Vista. Now, when I was in high school.
Things were so different. I'm 40. I graduated 88. I didn't actually graduate, but I would have graduated in 88. At my high school, if you got caught with a pack of camels, you were out. Yeah. Okay. Really? Oh, dude. There was no messing around. Wow. Out? There was no messing around. Oh, yeah. You were suspended if you were smoking. But this isn't necessarily about that, about breaking rules. This is more of a social thing. So I know a guy that works with some high school kids, and some of them go to Rancho Buena Vista. This past week, he's talking to them about prom coming up, and apparently some of the guys that go there, they plan to do something called the prom draft, where a group of popular guys, they get together, they go to a guy's house, and they draft who they're going to take to prom.
Now, the weirder thing is it's very public. They've made a Facebook page. Oh, my gosh. And he says that weirder thing is that the girls are down with it and they know about it. Now, just my take. I could be wrong. I don't think the girls are down with it. I think that they're pretending to be down with it because they're at that age where they don't want to seem. uncool and they also don't want to seem like they care or it bothers them they want to seem mature and in their eyes that's fine getting drafted for prom is a mature yeah like they're like what you know it would be immature if they had a problem they made a big deal about right they i think they think they're just at that age the girls where they don't they don't want to make a fuss i could be wrong
I could be 100% wrong. Couldn't it just be a group of friends that want to go? I mean, they're just, hey, we're going to go anyway. So, I mean, they probably all go on one big party bus as it is. I think it could be. I think it could be that, don't you? I mean, do you think there's something, is there anything fundamentally wrong with it? Here's, I think, where it could be bad is what if a girl is not drafted? That's terrible. What if she doesn't get asked? Mr. Irrelevant. Yeah, you're Mr. Irrelevant. Yeah. Oh, okay. What if you're... Let's paint a scenario of what it would look like, okay? How many guys in your head when you picture this? Nine? Okay, I don't know. Maybe more? I had 20. 20, okay. I had 20 guys... And call us if you know, if you go to Rancho Buena Vista or you have any knowledge of the prom draft, call us. I had it when you first told me a story. I've been thinking about it nonstop. I was fascinated by it. Yeah.
Because I think there's some genius in it. Oh, boy. Of course. Talk to me. Okay. So I pictured, when I was in high school, there was eight of us, and we were all best friends. Like, never went anywhere without each other. Right. But we all had younger girlfriends. Weird. And we didn't hang with the girls in our grade. So what I'm assuming is 20 guys get in a room. They take the 20 best on the board. You got us, you know, the ones that don't have boyfriends. They throw them in a hat. Then they do their draft order. And so, Mike Esparza, you are... What about Melissa Stevens, who's just a girl? She's pretty. She's out. She's not on that list. She's out. She's going to go with somebody that's not in our group. So now she feels like a turd. It's just like if you don't get asked. It's kind of like if you just don't get asked, except it seems like they're making it... I mean, they are making it public by having a Facebook page. They're probably going to post the draft.
Who they're taking. I mean, we know who the most popular kids are anyway. That's true. Let's get this out of the way. M1, Jason from Mira Mesa. What was the word of the day? That's right, buddy. We get a four-pack of tickets to SeaWorld and lunch for two at On the Border Hang in the Line, okay? If anybody has knowledge of the prom draft, call us. Please call us. Sienna, how would you feel about being... How do you feel about the prom draft? It's awful. It is? Because it's already, it's like a form of bullying in my mind. Because here are these poor girls that are seeing this wave. I mean, it's bad enough to be worried that you're not going to get asked. It's awful being a girl being waited to be asked. But then to see, not only am I not getting asked, but I'm not even on the top picks. Check this out, Woodsy. What about this? And I may, you still may sell me. Just giving you a devil's advocate. What if you're one of the 20? You're bummed out that you're 20. You're bummed out you're 19. Yeah, I mean, if you're the last pick in the draft. Now, here's the way that it makes sense to me. The big group, the big groups in high school that always are together, and you kind of know who's in your group and who's not. You probably had it, Sienna, when you were in high school. LLB, you probably had it. If they're all in agreement and they're like, hey, we're going to draft, because it can be a really fun thing. Like, hey, we're all single. If they're all friends. If they're all on board. If they're all on board.
It does take pressure off. You've got to understand that these are the popular dudes at RBV. Yeah, if it's just the popular Ds that are like... I don't know. No, no, no, no, no. Nobody said they're Ds. But think about... They're good dudes. Think about the real popular guys. If they are the popular Ds. Not all the popular guys at my high school were Ds. Not at all. But think about the ones that were. Think about those guys. There was a couple, dude. Sure. They were not mostly. We had 800 people in our graduating class, so we had a lot. We had 600 guys in mind, and there was probably, out of those 600 graduating guys, probably about 20 were really popular. Okay. And out of those 20, I'd say probably eight of them were Ds. Okay. Mine were 20 were douchebags. Take those eight Ds, put them in a room, and how does that sound? You know, those guys are like, listen, we can get anybody we want. It doesn't really matter who we take. We're going to do what we're going to do. And they all get together and they draft. That's a little different. But if they're all in agreement and they're on board and, hey, it's 20 of us, 20 of you guys, we're just going to draft and see who goes with each other because it'll be fun. LLB? It's one of the worst things. Oh! It's horrible. Oh, boy. Why? Why weird? It's not weird. It's terrible. How come? Okay, number one.
There's people that are on the fringes. Like I was one of those people in high school that didn't really subscribe to just like one group. I was like, here are my athlete friends. Here are my stoner friends. Here are like, you know what I mean? Different groups of people that I was friends with. And if you think you're in, number one, you find out you're not even part of the draft. That's got to be a devastating blow. You didn't already know? There's a lot of people that are on the fringes. I want to know. You think you're popular. It depends on the week when you're in high school. Who's in and who's out when those few people... I never even wanted to be in that group. That group of people that thought they were so hot. But that's you. That's you. There's no way. And by that point, I already had a girlfriend. I knew who I was going with. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we're not talking about people that have a girlfriend. We're talking about guys that are single and girls that are single. And if you're a single girl and you go to RBV and you didn't get drafted, you're not even on the freaking draft board, you feel like a dirtbag. You may be a perfect... Dude, my daughter came crying home to me. So you're telling me if a popular girl...
Would not get invited. If you're a popular girl, you're going. Right. Somebody's going to be asking you. But what if you're not? What if it's your kid and she's not? No, if you're a popular girl, you're going to prom. Yeah, you're going to prom if you're a popular girl. Period. You may not be on the draft board. You're not popular if you're not going. You may not be easy. Wait. Exactly. What if you're a girl that goes to the high school and you're not necessarily popular, but you're still... Then you probably weren't going anyway. Well, maybe you were. But not with one of those guys. Those are the popular guys. So why would they pick you? If you're not a popular girl, you're not going to go. So this is what you're saying, though. We are going to have a Facebook page that will definitively name the popular girls. And if you're not on this top 20, and you know this, you're not on that top 20. You know you're not on that top 20. No, you don't. No, you don't. I'm telling you, you don't. You just found out. You're oblivious. The only people that are happy in that draft are... possibly the top three girls. Oh, I guarantee they're all happy. They all hang out together. They're all friends. They all know how in they are. Excuse me. I'm a girl. I'm speaking from the perspective of who was once a teenage girl. We know women. I have girls that are worthy. I am a girl. She's a girl, though, it turns out. I'm trying to tell you. She's a girl. She's a girl, and you know it, and she has a girl part.
Yeah, and I'm trying to tell you, if you were number 20 of 20, you would not be happy. Haven't you seen the movie Mean Girls? We all have. And that's the top three girls. Lauren's right. They know that they're at the top. How do you know if you're popular when you're number 17 or 18? Oh, wait a minute. We're getting somebody that's a former RBV. M1, too cool for prom from San Diego. You went to RBV. I did go there. I went there. I'm class of 2005. I mean, it wouldn't be that bad to be part of the prom draft if you didn't get picked. I didn't even go to my senior prom, and my twin brother did, and he said I was fortunate not to go. I saved a buck. Yeah, easy, Jay. Wait, hang on, though. You realize that you're in the minority because most people think the prom is cool. Yeah, well, I went to my junior prom. That was a lot of fun, dude. I had a great time. Well, yeah. Prom's fun. Sounds like your twin brother was trying to make you feel better, but you didn't miss anything, buddy. He left early. He came in. We went to a little prom after party. It was a good time. That's the fun part. The prom after party is the best. Prom itself in and of itself sucks. The after party. The after party is where it's at. I would not know. I would not know. Legendary. Legendary.
Hotel rooms all around. I didn't go either. Didn't you take Wendy to prom? I went to prom, but I had track meets the next day. Did you hear that? Did you hear that? Wendy's. I didn't hear it. Did you take Wendy's to prom? Spicy. Jay's on my bad list right now. I'm not laughing at his jokes. Thank you. And it was McDonald's. Wendy McDonald's. She was a two-bagger. Why am I laughing? You do like redheads, man. Wendy's, you know what I mean? M1 McKenzie from Oceanside. Well, I'm going to be going to RBV next year, and to think that I'm coming to this school just to be rated on how pretty or cute I am to be going with a guy that thinks he can get whoever he wants is just not right. That's wrong. What if you were the number one pick?
Well, that would feel good. Would feel good to be the number one pick. But aside from the number one pick. Yeah, I agree with you. But I think if you were the number one pick, you'd be stoked. Just like if the roles were reversed and they're like, all right, number one pick, the senior class of 1993, Steve Woods. I'd be like, what's up, dude? It would be great. With the final pick of the 1988. Prom draft. Melissa Short. Selects. 250 pound. Mike Esparza. With the final pick. Of the 1988. Prom draft. Hello everyone. This is the superintendent of Gilroy High School. With the. First pick. The 1988. Gilroy High School draft. Kim Yaffe selects.
six-foot-tall, 190-pound Stephen Woods. Yeah! Get some! Three hours later. And with the final selection of the 1988 Gilroy High School prom draft, Brian Stevens selects 250-pound Mike Esparza. for the 1988 prom draft. He was the only person left at school. The last person left. He's not even a senior. He's actually a sophomore. Isn't he a janitor? He's a foreign exchange student. We're not even really sure he picked you. He just, he's a foreign exchange. He doesn't speak English. By default. He doesn't really speak English. With you being Mexican, maybe you would understand. He's actually blind, too, so he needs somebody to guide him around. Just be happy you have a date. Yeah, just be happy. Stop complaining.
Mike, you know you're lucky to be going to this prom, right? Hey, you got your foot in the door, pal. That's the most important part. Beggars can't be choosers. Oh, my gosh. Oh, mama sweet. Oh, boy. I want to know, man. Call me. 570-1949 if you know anything about the prom draft. I want to know. Oh, my God. It's better than I thought. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. It's almost here, and it will sell out in advance. FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Presented by Miller Lite. Sunday, June 5th at the Oceanside Pier Amphitheater. Ten great artists on two stages and one wandering ombre playing swampy, heavy-sounding blues.
I wanna see you in Tickets are only $35 with no additional fees. As always, $1 of every ticket sold will go to the About the Music Fund, which helps to support music education in San Diego County Public Schools. Tickets are on sale now, but they're going fast. Purchase them online at independencejam.com or at fm949sd.com. FM 94.9 Independence Jam. Coastal Invasion. Presented by Triple Hops Brewed Miller Lite. Taste greatness. Independence Jam is also supported by Grubbies and Los Tacos. See you on Sunday, June 5th in Oceanside. TV? Hello? Yes, Sally. I am so excited for a new Fox Wednesday. It's the American Idol top four and a brand new breaking in. You're drooling on my screen. Sorry.
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on everything. Hi, I'm New York Mike of San Diego Harley-Davidson reminding you to join us if you can on Saturday, May 14th for a blessing of the bikes at Mount Soledad. Mount Soledad Memorial, the perfect place to be thankful to God and the warriors who protect us all. This report, it's brought to you by Kaiser Permanente. Music makes us feel good. Studies show that music can reduce depression, calm you down, even offer relief from pain. Here's a sonic prescription from Kaiser Permanente. Listen to music daily and thrive. On the 15 southbound before old 395 highway, we've got a truck that's stuck. It's blocking that left shoulder. They're just waiting on a tow truck. 56 westbound expects some traffic congestion from Carmel Valley Road to the 5. And it looks like all the way through the 805 northbound, we've got delays. from Murray Ridge Road to Governor Drive. This report brought to you by Big O Tires. At Big O Tires, you can purchase four select Goodyear Dunlap tires. Save up to $80. Buy a mail-in rebate. Plus, trade in your old tires. Get up to $100 back. Save big at Big O Tires. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9.
And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. And I wear like a 44 small. Lauren. I'm a lyricist. Woods. I mean, hey, listen, I did snuff on the flag, okay? Zienna. I put my head down because if I hear someone cry, I cry. And Jay. You'd have to be dying not to come down and help you. Yeah. I would have to have had my arm chopped off. On FM 94.9. OSI is three days away. Oh, yeah, baby. Very soon. It's actually three days, two hours, 25 minutes, 27 seconds. It's going to take place at Qualcomm Stadium. It's our brand-new bumper sticker and your chance to win a brand-new Harley-Davidson from Harley-Davidson, San Diego. And it's going to be awesome, man. So, B at OSI, telling you, get there early. Starts at 10 is when we're going to start putting these stickers on the cars, but you can get there early, line up. Get an envelope. Everybody gets a little something-something.
But somebody's going to win an FXDB Harley-Davidson from San Diego Harley-Davidson that day. Somebody's going to win a home theater system from Tried and True Home Theater and security, TV, Blu-ray player, install. So come on out. It's going to be really, really cool. OSI is Saturday. And every person that I know, save for a couple that have to work or whatever, everybody's going. So do it. So there's a couple people that were calling and want to finish up on this talk with the prom draft. M1 Ashes from Escondido, are you there? Yes, I am. What did you want to say? So I talked to my sister. She goes there currently. You actually know her. And she was saying that it was actually made by her friend who basically made it up as a joke. It's not even real. So they don't really do it? It's 100% a joke. The girls, guess what's happening is the senior guys are kind of asking a lot of the younger girls, not the senior girls. And so it was just as a joke, like, hey, what if we make up this draft? Like, what if there's, you know, some process you have to go through in order to get asked? Because, you know, these senior girls aren't getting asked. It's more the younger girls. So that's who it's all really for. It's for the younger girls. But it's not real. It was just a joke. Like, what if we did this?
Now, do they actually draft names? No, they're not going to draft names. It was just a joke as what if we were... The idea. Why did they do a Facebook page then? That's how big of a joke it is. The younger girls came up with it? Yes, by my understanding. The senior girls love that. Oh, I'm sure. It was just a joke. And then Brittany's friend, who is a boy, kind of just... took it further of like, what if we make it a, you know, a draft, but it's all just a, a joke. That guy will be running a company someday. Yeah. Yeah. Million dollar ideas like that. Yeah. You've met Brittany. I have? Yeah. You've met Brittany. She's our, she's, she'll babysit for us when Nita or somebody like in emergency situations. And Britney, when I asked her, she was like, yeah, if this was real, I would be on that draft list. But it's just a joke. No one's making it. Her and the majority of brands would probably end up on it. I will tell you this. Now, you can be honest. Britney has got to be among the more popular girls at school. For sure. Yeah. She's very pretty. Distractive young lady. I think pretty is an understatement. That is...
Yeah. Listen, I'm a married man. I as well am a married man. Man is our keyword. Man being the keyword. Adult man. We're adult men. She's 17, 18. How old is Brittany? 17, going to be 18. Don't even care. What was that again? Woods. What? I just didn't hear you cut her off. It's not very professional. You're fine. Everyone's fine. It's not one of your favorite names. All right. Oh, boy. Thank you very much. Welcome. We're going to leave it there. Everything's good. Thank you. Does she watch dogs at all? I told my wife, I go, I said, listen. Just kidding, honey. I think that this is a good move on a husband's part. Oh, boy. What'd you do? I said, I'm not driving her home. Not because I think that I'm going to do anything, but because it's not a... No. I'm not driving a 17-year-old good-looking girl home. I've seen some movies where that happened. It's weird. It's uncomfortable. It is. It's uncomfortable. And it doesn't matter if she's pretty or if she isn't. You just don't. It's very creepy. It's creepy. It's very adult film. Like, why don't you take her home, babe? Why don't you take her home? You do it. It's just, you know what I mean? Like, how about you take her home? And I don't say that for any other reason than...
You know, I'm an adult man. It's not appropriate. It's not appropriate. Oh, wow. Too many scenarios have been played out, L.O.B. It isn't that I'm going to sleep with her or I'm going to do anything, but it's just inappropriate, don't you think? You're making me uncomfortable. L.O.B. Okay. I don't know if it's inappropriate so much as it's uncomfortable because I usually dealt with the mom for all the booking, all the instructions, the paying and stuff like that. But then drunk husband would drive me home. Oh, yeah. See? What does a 15-year-old girl say to a 45-year-old man? That's hammered. Yeah. On scotch. Yeah, you really, you don't have anything. Did they ever say a flirty thing? No. Never. It was never like that. It was just like, just what do you have in common? You don't, and that's an uncomfortable drive, and it's just not. It's not inappropriate. Yeah. It's a little, it is. It is. What? It is. You guys are crazy. If it's a guy, I don't care.
If it was, well, first of all, I would never let a guy babysit. I was a babysitter. I would never, ever. I would never let you babysit. Why? I'm good with kids. There was like male au pairs that do what Nita does. And I said to Rebecca, I'm like, listen, to each their own. You know, to each their own. Who's that family? Britney Spears. Yeah. Yeah. That goes, listen, we're going to have somebody live in our house for a year. How about this dude? It's a Manny. Single mom. Yeah, Manny. How about we have this Manny come stay here? This would be great. I'm from Germany. I get to babysit the children. Yeah, guess what? You're in yellow short shorts. Yes, correct. I want to take up surfing. You're wearing a red tank top and yellow short shorts. What is the big deal? I play with Luke and Ryan and Yake and it's a fun time.
Where are your shoes? Why are you barefoot off the plane? Because it's natural. It's just what we do. Are you a hippie? No, you're so tense, Mike. Let me rub your shoulders. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't. Excuse me, I am from the same agency as this guy. I'll take you. And he doesn't even have any qualifications. I love children. They love me. We play in the yard. He wants to get to America to see a blue man group. That's the whole reason he came here? Is because he wanted to see the blue man group? That's what he told me in the little room where they interview you. So, wait a second. You're telling me... What's your name? My name is Friedrich. Friedrich. You're telling me, Friedrich, that you, in those yellow short shorts and red tank top. Yes, the colors of Germany. Okay, I'm smelling the colors of no deodorant. This is the colors of Benetton that you're smelling. You're not used to it because it went out of production in 1984. Yeah, you buy it for 45 cents. Correct, inside the street in Munich.
And it's not even the real Benetton. Correct. It's a knockoff. It's a knockoff. It's a fake. It's a fake Benetton. Correct. It's Feneton. Feneton. And you don't even want to watch kids. You want to see the freaking blue man group. I don't know what she speak of, this blue man group. This is what he told me. She's trying to get a job. Look, she press her boob up like this. I can't help her. So you like to see and hire her. She looks normal. She doesn't have anything. Booms sticking out of top of shirt. Excuse me, at least I went through the process. I went through the process. I would not be here. No, you. Really? Correct. Who do you pick? You don't have any shoes on. Listen, who do you pick? I love Yake and Ryan and Rebecca. Who is Yake? I don't know who Yake is. Yake is your son, Yake. Why is there a silent J in German? That's just the way he acts. He doesn't talk much except to say dirty things. Correct. You're making me mix up my accent now, too. Saying things that are German. It's unbelievable. Do Germans not drop the J? I can't see too much. Is that Dana Coffey over there next to me? Let's play buzzword. Oh, yes!
570-1949. What's the prize, Jay? The prize today is lunch for two at On the Border Mexican Grill. All right, you got to call and pick me, Sienna, Woods, or L.O.B. Now, L.O.B. guarantees. Stop it. She's the best. No, I'm not. She guarantees that she'll win. She says that she's better than everybody. I've never said that. Anybody and everybody. Never. That's ever even played buzzwords. That's true. I've been pretty bad lately. The creators of the game look to her. She'll win for sure. Stop trying to jinx me. There's no question. She's on today, too. Oh, she's feeling. Oh, she's feeling. She's feeling. Good energy. She's ready to go. I'm not. What happens is Jay gives us a word, and then he gives us a clue about that word, and we've got to incorporate the word into the clue and shout it out. And he's the final judge. Yes. Let's see. Let's take these calls. M1 Rick from Escondido. Who do you want? I'll take Wood. Okay, hang on. Mistake. M1 Lisa from Lakeside. Who do you want?
I want Sienna. Yeah. Mistake. Love you. M1, Shawnee from Oceanside. Who do you want? Nike. Big mistake. Thanks a lot, guys. Extra large mistake. King size. Triple X. Mistake. M1, Twizzle from San Diego. How strange. You want who? L-O-B, the one who likes black guys. Yeah. L-O-B. The one who left. I take it back. Like my man. L.O.B.'s going to win, I'm sure. There's no question. Stop jinxing me. You're so good, Lauren. Lauren, you win every time. You win every week. You guys already caused me to get picked last. Jay, what's the word? What is it? Today's word is eat. E-A-T. Eat. Let's do this. Here we go.
Oh, this is something neither one of you guys do. Consume your carrots and cauliflower. Eat your vegetables! Ooh, that was a three-way tie. Everyone said something different. I said eat your vegetables. We said eat your veggies and eat your vegetables. Same thing. It's a three-way tie. Okay. To retract a statement. Eat your words! Mikey. Damn it. That was good, Mike. You lost every word, Mikey. The bad word wasn't fat. Consume too much. Eat too much. Overeat. Dang it. You know that, Woods. Oh my gosh, with the thrust. His thrust is so distracting. It makes me want to leave the room. It's so sick. Oh yeah. To stall the ball to waste the remaining seconds. Eat the clock. Dang it. Nice, Lauren. Dang it. You could have flubbed your words on that one. It would have been a bad mistake. Dang it. All you guys have to. Yeehaw!
Don't try to act like you didn't say something. Oh, I didn't even think about that. Me? Yes, you. I didn't say it. Yes, you. I didn't say it. Mr. Ed could dine in this manner. Eat like a horse. Eat from a trough. What? Eat from a trough. Eat hay. Eat oats. Eat in a barn. Eat horse stuff. Stand while he's eating. Horse races. Stuff Mr. Eddie Eats. For a hundred. Have dinner and split. E-Run! Woods. If I'm being honest, I think it was a tie. Did he say the same thing? He said the same thing. Maybe don't scream it in the mic. Mike and Lauren have two. Woods has four. Give a man a fish and... He'll eat for a day! He'll eat for a lifetime! He'll eat like... Woods. Woods. He'll eat fish. I don't eat fish. He'll eat fish. Burrito. Covered in chocolate. McDonald's. Covered in McDonald's. Humble yourself. Eat, grow. Wow, I've never heard that. No. Go, Jay! I don't know what it is. Okay, here we go. Doesn't make sense to me. Dine in a restaurant. Eat up. Yeah, that's it. That doesn't make sense to me. It just didn't. I just.
It says to dine. Dinner! I don't know what dine means. Why would anyone do anything but make dinner and save money? Why would people eat somewhere else than their barn or home? The campfire. Why would somebody eat anywhere but a campfire, a barn, or their wooden cabin? That's it. What's the score, Sienna? Mike three, Lauren two, Woods six. Lauren's going to win for sure. Okay, I've got some three-point questions here. I want another word. Nope, new word is gold. Thank God. I had to eat your heart out in my head. G-O-L-D. Gold. What you get for 50 years of service. A gold chart! Oh, yeah. Mikey, what'd you say? Gold star. Three-pointer, Sienna. Good job. She was a three-pointer. Wait, that was you, right? Yeah, that was me. Dang it! Okay. Let's see. Austin Powers movie. Gold member! Sienna. Gold finger, right? Gold member. Gold member. Gold finger was a 007 movie. Oh, right. Let's see. Mike has three. Lorna's two. I now have three. Woods has...
Nine. Oh, boy. We've got one more question. All right, let's do it. It's a five-pointer. That's all I can say about it. One who marries for money. Goldsinger! What? Part of gold! The air pregnant. The air pregnant. Woo! I hate you guys. Yeah! M1 Rick from Escondido. Good job, Wood. Thanks, buddy. Here you go. Well done. Feast on the border. He jumped ship on me. Rick used to be my guy. He did? Yes. And you guys jinxed me. That strategy is starting. Oh, it's brilliant. It's finally starting to work. You know what also works is the mic technique that Woods has. Yes, Woods. I just play the same game every week. I play the same way. Just play the same. Try to win. I'm in it to win it. Hey, did you guys see? Bin Laden is one of the only guys in the history of the world to ever get his face on the cover of Time magazine with a red X through it. The only other times it's been done is for Hitler, Saddam Hussein, and Abu Musab al-Zaqwari. God bless you. Oh, boy, Dad. Oh, wow. Dad. Listen.
I'm sorry, but Saddam Hussein bears a striking resemblance to my father. He really does. It's been said. He has my chins and your dad's mustache. It's been said. I mean, everyone knows it. Everyone. Everybody. I tell him, I say, he looks like a combination of two very, very distinguished gentlemen. Saddam Hussein. and the most interesting man in the world. Your dad is that guy. Yeah. I'm sure Saddam got it all the time. They're probably like, oh, yeah. Yeah, on the Dos Equis commercial, you look like the most interesting man. No, you look like Mr. Esparza. Daniel Esparza from San Diego. Yeah, that's right. Identical. I can't believe it. Look at that all the time. No. Don't say it. It's not me. I look like Danny. Okay? I know. That's a pretty hardcore cover. It's extremely hardcore. But, hey, I mean, it's fitting. Yeah. It's fitting. Yeah. Hitler back in the 30s. Or, excuse me, in the 40s. It was 1945, May 7th, 45. Saddam Hussein. Remember that? April 21st, 2003. And Abu Musab al-Zaqawi. Sure.
Any tissue? June 19th, 2006. We should do the terrorist spelling bee. It would be impossible. Woods. Yes. I need you to spell A-Z-A-Q-A-R-I. A-L space. Dash. Okay, dash. I'll give you the dash. A-L dash. Z-A-Q-U-A-R-I. Very close. Very close. Damn it. No, it's Z-A-R-Q-A-W. I forgot. Oh, Q-A-W. Yeah, I was way up. Very close. Our number here is 570-1949. And you can also text us 949mikey at gmail.com. Chastity Bono has become Chaz Bono. Really? And Chaz was on Good Morning America.
and talking about what it's like to now be a dude you as we see and we'll see tonight in the documentary um the shots that you have to take this test wrong that it has changed you and it has changed how you look at women how you view women no it hasn't changed how i view women but it has you know i've become much more male so it's it's changed my Oh, how do I say? I don't want to be offensive in any way. Go ahead. When I'm in a group. It's okay for a transgendered person to be politically incorrect. Yeah, I think they get a pass. If you're a guy, you cannot. No. But if you are a girl who becomes a guy, it's okay. Free pass. It's the oldest trick in the book. Oldest trick in the book. Everybody's done it. Every girl has done it at one time. Become a guy. So they can make a comment. Right. Or two. Because so many of my friends are women. Right. Oh, that old trick. Weird. I can't be a sexist. Some of my best friends are women. You know, get in a group of women and they'll start talking as women can do. And I just can't do that anymore. I just can't talk endlessly about sexism. You know, whatever. So what we're going after is not a gossip or whatever. I don't want to talk about purses anymore.
Or Manolo Blahniks. I can't watch The View. I used to watch it all the time, and now it makes me nuts. It makes me nauseous. It's a bunch of hens sitting around talking, and I'm out on it. I'm watching Baseball Tonight. It's my favorite news show. We're watching a lot of hockey. I freaking threw up yesterday. I saw Joy Behar. Yeah, she's repulsive. I used to love her. She was like, everything she said, I agreed with. Now? Vomit. I couldn't be more out. Dude, I was into Desperate Housewives, Gilmore Girls, Gossip Girl. Anything with a judge. Anything with a judge. If they had a judge on it, Dancing with the Stars, American Idol, The X Factor, The Voice, America's Next Top Model, I was in. I don't like chocolate anymore. I don't like telling my girlfriend to pick up her dirty socks. I'm like, yeah. Get them out of here. I can't watch anything about a housewife. One thing I started doing, too, is I leave my plates in the sink. Like, I'll eat a sandwich, and I'll just throw it in the sink. Right. And I don't put it in the dishwasher, because why would? I'm a dude.
I won't even notice it, but my hand will just wander down my pants. Yeah. I don't even notice. Why did that even get there? I blacked out, I guess. I don't have nuts, but if I did, I'd hold them. I buttercup myself yesterday. I've never done that before. All right? I always, always leave the toilet seat out. Always. I was sitting there. I was watching SportsZero. Buttercup. First time for everything. Hey. Wow. Too far. Take the air right out of the room. Yeah. Buttercuped it. Buttercup the air out of the room. Buttercup the air out of the room. Never finished the story about the dude in Australia that got bit by the death adder. Oh, yes. So I watched. It was the first thing I did when I walked in the house yesterday. I'll tell you all about it next. San Diego Radio has never mobilized this type of takeover. The prizes are huge. This Saturday, the Mikey Show and M1's takeover Qualcomm Stadium.
10 a.m. Station Street Impact. Brand new Mikey Show sticker is in and ready for your ride. It will receive surprise. We've got a his and her mountain bike from Haro. A brand new Ibanez guitar. A 42-inch LG plasma with 5.1 surround sound and Blu-ray player. Plus, we're adding new prizes daily and Did we mention a brand new $24,000 FXDB Harley from San Diego Harley Davidson? The choice of drinking light beer with great tasting Miller Lite. Taste points at awesome summer discounts. So man up. Points.com today. 111 and then 7. Full terms and conditions at tastepoints.com. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Great. This spring, refresh the way you do wireless with Cricket. Connect to friends and family more than ever with our incredible line of sales.
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Enjoy every weekend of Viva La Musica along with all your favorite SeaWorld rides, shows, and annual encounters with a fun card. Pay for a day, play all year. The fun continues this weekend with Viva La Musica at SeaWorld. For showtimes or to buy your fun card, visit SeaWorld.com slash Viva. Concert seating is limited. Entertainment subject to change without notice. Event included with park admission. Restrictions apply. I'm your overly optimistic husband who assured you we had enough gas to make it home. Apparently, the power of positive thinking is far less valuable than the power of gasoline. Hope you have Good Hands Roadside Assistance. Introducing Good Hands Roadside from Allstate. A different kind of roadside assistance. You'll never pay a dime unless you use it. And it's open to everyone, not just Allstate customers. Go to allstate.com slash roadside to register. and get important information. Hey guys, it's Woodsy. And L.O.B. from The Mikey Show. Think you got talent? Join us May 21st at the Mira Mesa Epicenter for Mira Mesa's Got Talent. We're looking for singers, dancers, musicians, comedians, jugglers, anything you think is a talent, but keep it clean. Try out for May 12th from 6 to 9 at the Mira Mesa Epicenter. Finalists will compete May 21st for a chance to win over $500 in prizes and...
We'll be the judges. So log on to MiramesaTheaterGuild.org for tickets and info. That's theater with an R-E. Proceeds benefit the Miramesa Theater Guild. You can search the web and scour the papers. You won't find a lower mortgage rate than a Navy Federal Credit Union. We're so sure rates are the lowest, we're putting our money where our mouth is. If we can't match a lower rate, we'll pay you. Come on into your new home. It's easier to get now than ever because Navy Federal's mortgage rates are crazy low and will match any rate that's lower or you get paid. For details, visit NavyFederal.org and check out our first-time homebuyer package. It's crazy good, too, with that new home smell. Equal housing lender. Chevron Extra Mile has always been my go-to store, but now they're giving me even more reasons to go, like a chance to win Extra Mile bucks instantly or a Disneyland Resort vacation to experience the new Star Tours with airfare from Southwest Airlines Vacations just by entering my code online. Maybe it's a Jedi mind trick. You know, I don't care. I'm going anyway.
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USAA is proud to be the official military appreciation partner of the San Diego Padres. Find out when USAA and the Padres are honoring the military this season. Stop by the local USAA Financial Center in Oceanside or go to usaa.com slash Padres. This report is brought to you by Napa Auto Parts. This May is ultimate tune-up month at Napa, so hurry in now. Get up to a $75 mail-in rebate at participating Napa Auto Parts stores and auto care centers. See your store for details. Heading on to the 52 westbound after Mass Boulevard, there is a car blocked. It's in the center lane right now. Also, the 5 southbound before Encinitas Boulevard, we've got a car blocking the left shoulder. A problem here on the 5 northbound after Manchester Avenue, a car blocking the left shoulder. A car lost a tire. Traffic is bottlenecking in this area. And the 805 southbound after Home Avenue, a disabled tractor trailer loaded with scrap metal. It's all over the right shoulder. This report also brought to you by Del Taco. They've got that new big fat crispy chicken taco. Crispy chicken, fresh tomatoes, crisp lettuce, chipotle sauce, bacon ranch sauce, and warm flatbread. Chicken tastes better in a taco. And it's only at Del Taco. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9.
KBZT San Diego, a Lincoln Financial radio station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm not very aware of what's happening around me. Lauren. Hey, if you got lips, you'd be smooching. Woods. I'm not doing butterfly kisses with you, dude. Zienna. Ooh, tagalongs. And Jay. I'm an awesome beer drinker on the course. On FM 94.9. This guy wrote on your page, Woodsy, Chad. Yes. So the reason Chad wrote on Woodsy's page is because... We were talking about Chastity Bono. It's Chaz Bono. Now Chaz Bono. Now Chaz. Was Chastity, became a man, now is Chaz Bono. Now, M1 Chad is calling in. Are you there, Chad? Yeah, I'm here. And your deal is that you're related to somebody that's marrying somebody that was once somebody else. Oh, that's a long line. Explain. Well, they started dating, like, how many years?
I have one of my family members, my aunt. Yeah. And she was dating somebody. I'm not even named, so. Right. Anyway, they were dating, whatever. Dating a woman, right? Correct. Your aunt was dating a woman? Correct. Okay. So your aunt's gay. Was gay. Oh, wrap your brain around that one. Okay. Your aunt was dating a woman. And she's gay. She's experimenting, maybe. Chick decided to become a man for whatever reason. I don't know. Your aunt or the person your aunt was dating? Yeah, the person my aunt was dating. So she's like Chastity's girlfriend. Yeah. Now, has your aunt always been gay? I think so. I mean, she was married to a woman. That's a long story. Yeah, I think that qualifies. Yeah, that qualifies. If she was married to a woman, I think that's gay. But she now likes men? No, the woman turned into a man. I think he's saying his aunt.
Doesn't, isn't gay anymore. Right. No, she's not because her girlfriend became a man. Yeah. So that makes her straight. Now she's a bi-curious lesbian. Right. What's weird about it is he tries to do stuff. He's real little, real little guy. And for example, they went to a store and he was trying to move this 100-pound shelving unit and almost killed him. So he was a small woman, small framed woman. And now became a man and is like a jockey. Mikey. Yeah. It's pretty wild. Is that accurate? I just got a crazy visual of the shelving like, ah! That's pretty weird. Oh. Oh. Ah. Dude. Yeah. It's pretty weird. And I love my family. For sure. Yeah. Yeah. It's a little odd. It is. Yeah, 100%. The thing that really... I don't understand it. If you're gay, you don't like dudes. Right. So then why are you staying if you're proving that you can like dudes, but they're not really dudes? You're disproving gay. It's a woman's brain and a man's body. It's a woman's intellect and soft touch. No! They change with the hormones. Maybe they didn't add a tree to that for us. Well, you can't all of a sudden...
You can't be a sheep and all of a sudden become a wolf. It doesn't work that way. Right. That's what they call a wolf and sheep. This is Uncle Victor. I don't understand. I don't understand why, what the deal is. Which one are you? If you want a girl and you're a girl, how come then later you want something different? Pepper's a sausage. How come... Hey, make up your mind already. What is your deal? Be curious. Be curious. I have a friend who's gay, and I went to one of those... We get it. You're not homophobic. No, no, no. You have a friend. Easy. Easy. No, I'm just saying... We get it. You're liberal. He's a man.
And we went to one of those like lips type things where the men dress as, there's a place in town called Lips. Men dress as women. I'm like, oh, the one on 3rd and 5th. Is that the one on 43rd and 6th? Okay, but the majority of patrons there were gay men. Right. And so I'm asking him, I'm like, okay, I don't get it. Because I thought you were attracted to men. So why are you going to see men dressed as women? I can answer that question. I have a friend. Woods, when you worked at that gay nightclub, the Mashed Potato Club, remember Woods when you worked at a gay nightclub called the Mashed Potato Club? Do you remember that, Woods? Remember Woods? Remember when you worked there? Hey, Woods. Hey, Woods. Can you hear us? Remember when you were a bartender at a gay nightclub called... Do you remember when you worked there? Yeah. Hey, Woodsy. Hey. Hey, Woodsy, old pal.
Remember when you served Cosmopolitans as a bartender to guys at the gay nightclub? Hey, Woods, excuse me. Do you remember when you worked at that place where there was like the drag shows that happened? Yeah, remember that. What was it called? The Mashed Potato Club? Yes, it was. It was a restaurant that was gay friendly. Hey, Woods. It had a mural of two gay men. Two gay women and a regular man and a straight man. All commoners. Yeah, remember when you worked there? Hey, what? Remember that time? Hey, can you hear me? I got you. Do you remember? Remember that time? Remember when you worked there? Sure do. Remember when you used to make mad tips at that game place? Yes. Remember when you used to tie your shirt like over your head? Like ginger. Like the hot potato. The mashed potato. The hot potato. Remember when you were a french fry? Yeah. Remember they called you sweet potato pie? Oh, that hurt. I remember. I remember. Ouch.
Damn it. Anyway, my point being my gay friend didn't even know. So I'm sure you can relate. Oh my gosh. It's one of the greatest stories ever. It was a lot of female business at that time, my friend. I had to throw in female in there. Sure. Anyway, Chad. I had to ask Chad because he is going to stay with them. Is that going to be weird? I am currently. You know, you are staying there. Yeah, correct. Oh, I hope they're not listening. Sorry. Oh, yeah. I already thought about it when I called in. I'm like, man, whatever. You know, it is what it is. I saw a special on it the other day. Ever watch specials? Yeah, you ever watch documentaries? What's it called? I want to watch. Was it on the Okra Network? Coming over. It was in high definition. Let's see it in 3D. And, man, I'll tell you, this girl became a guy and really did look like a guy. Yeah. I mean, really did. They have, like...
All kinds of, like, hormones they take. Oh, yeah. I mean, they grow beards and stuff. Yeah, yeah. Now, granted, they grow beards that look like woods. My beard, like, just disgusting. Maybe I was a woman. There's no maybe about it. I feel like it does work better that way when guys... become women, it's a lot more convincing. No. Well, not all the time. There's a better batting average. I think each way, I think each way, you know, because I actually worked at a radio station and they called a meeting. Staff meeting. Thank you for the call, Chad. Good luck, buddy. Good luck. With what? Yeah. Just the whole situation. Good luck with living with your aunt that's living with her girlfriend who became a boyfriend. Yes, good luck. Just in life. In life. Just throughout life, good luck. General good luck and well wishes from Woods on the Mikey Show. To you. To you, Chad. Good luck, my friend. General good fortune. Yeah, just well wishes. They called an all-staff meeting. That always means you're fired. Yes. In radio, it means you're fired. They call an all-staff meeting. So we're all like, great. We got sold. We're getting fired.
So we all show up. I was doing afternoons at the radio station. And at the time, Lamont and Tinelli were doing mornings. Yeah. Love Lamont and Tinelli. Some real good friends of mine. Clowns. Huge clowns. I mean, these guys. Dirty birds. They're dirty birds. And they are from the school of clownery. Yes. Okay. So we get called into this meeting. And the guy that calls us in the meeting, the general manager. is the most buttoned up suit you can imagine. I mean, buttoned up suit. And he starts the meeting by saying, I don't want any jokes because what I'm about to tell you isn't funny. Oh, wow. To a bunch of radio people. To a bunch of radio people. What I'm about to tell you isn't funny. I don't want any jokes. If there are any jokes, I'm going to tell you right now, it's going to be met sternly.
There is a member of our staff, you name the guy, who is currently on vacation. When he returns, he will be a woman. He's had elective sexual reassignment and is going to be coming back to the radio station and is going to be known as this name. And legally, there cannot be. Any comments? Any jokes? Blah, blah, blah. Does anybody have any questions? Lamont. Hand up. Lamont, is it going to use the bathroom or the urinal? Oh. And then he goes. You got to be kidding me. Oh, my gosh. Brilliant. It was the most uncomfortable meeting I've ever been in. How did you control yourself? I was probably drunk. Yeah? Bite your tongue in half. I would have had to bite my tongue in half.
Cool guy. Cool lady. I remember him. I remember her. How did you prefer this individual? Him because I was more comfortable. When he became she, it was a little uncomfortable to be, you know, because she wore a lot of makeup and she was very tall. She was 6'1". Were there signs of it before the she? No. In fact, and she talked like this. On air? Yes. Oh, she came back on the air. As a different name? At first, no. At first, no. But then as the hormones started to kick in, had to. And it was full on like this. Different name? Yes. And were people asking, where did Fred go? Well, let me tell you this. The on-air name used to be, and I'm not, I can't make this up. The on-air name used to be Uncle Something. And it became Ant. I'm not kidding you. Sucked. I gotta go.
True story. Great guy. Very kind to me. Very sweet person. And he had a girlfriend who became a lesbian because he became a she. That's love. And so she, you know. I think if I became a woman, I think my wife would become a lesbian. He got that going for you. She loves me that much. Well, we'll take a commercial break and then... No, we have more time. Let's really work this out. Yeah, it's fine. I'll stand behind that. That would be how you would... Isolate! Jamie Kitt! Hey, babe! It's a woman's role to make dinner. Really? I think she would. Can't you be sensitive? You ever just... You ever just make fun of me for not having a wiener anymore?
It's that time of the month, Jamie. Leave me alone. Wait. You ever just leave the lid up? Little girl's real sensitive. I used to call myself the kid. Now I'm the little girl. I'm the girl. Little girl's not feeling good today. I like girls. I don't play baseball. I don't play baseball. I like girls. I like boys. Grow up, Peter Pan. Grow up. I think she would. Really? I think your husband would become a homosexual if he became a man. Don't you? Yeah. Did I? Don't you think? I don't know. They love you that much. He likes my boobs, I think. Yeah. If they went anywhere, he'd be bummed. Yeah, they surgically have to take them. Oh, yeah. Take them right off. Yeah. What do they do? I'd be fine. I'm halfway there. Oh, boy. I've got breasts, so I'm in good shape. Oh. Won't even cost me much. Ow. Hmm. These little guys here, those will do. Please don't jiggle them. You both could motorboat. Oh, boy. It's definitely... Yeah, we could motorboat each other. Maybe a...
Jay, maybe let's just shut it down today. Just imagine that. Take it to the house. Jay just, you know, he's done a lot of them. Got enough of them out there. Yeah. Well, Woodson's already leaning that way. Might as well just see it through, right? I'm all right. I like my boys. Emma and Stacy from San Diego. Hello, guys. Hi. I had the same situation happen in my job like a year ago. One of the guys went on vacation and had the reassignment surgery, and we had this huge, big HR meeting, and we were told not to laugh the whole bit. Well, this company is huge, and there was a lot of people, when they found out who it was, they felt betrayed because they've known this guy for over 20 years, and they've went out to baseball games and drinking and the whole bit, and everybody was all upset. So in the meeting, they asked if anybody had any questions, and I said, I don't have any questions, but I do have a comment. I said, the only reason that we know what's going to happen with this... person is because it's physical i said how many of you gamble beat your wives are child molesters has robbed a bank or do all kind of things and have all kind of craziness in your in your closet over there so when i was done saying my little thing everybody kind of like looked around and they felt all shame because i know there's a lot of guys one of the guys got arrested for child molestation wow and you're just calling him out in the meeting like you brian you sicko
When I was in the meeting, I faced each one of them when I said gambling and child beating. Oh, my gosh. Good job, Judge Judy. Oh, my goodness. I don't have a filter. So I looked at each one of them, you know, alcoholic, gambling. And I looked at each one of them, and they kind of, like, all looked down. And when I was done, the guy from HR, everybody was leaving the meeting. And the guy from HR said, can you come back for second shift? Oh, my gosh. Did anyone give you the slow clap? Yes. No. Yes. Nobody wanted to say anything. Exactly. Thank you, Stacey, for that comment. Thank you. Clearly, no one's perfect. They're like, well, Stacey, thank you for that. I do have my issues with alcohol. Thank you. Phil, sorry about the bra you're wearing. In a word, touche. Touche. You got me. When you get me, you get me. When you're caught, you're caught. I guess I do like that. Is everyone clear about tomorrow's potluck? Questions about that? Should we talk about time cards and open enrollment now? Since we've all been called out as pedophiles and alcoholics?
I figured that's a good enough lead-in to the white elephant this year. Don't forget, tomorrow's Casual Friday. Casual Friday, wear a Hawaiian shirt or jeans if you like. Tomorrow, jeans are jeans Friday. Lips are still unacceptable. Sienna, will you get everybody's name down? We're going to put them in a hat and do the drawing. Yeah, I guess, Bill, you can wear a denim skirt. According to Stacey. We're going to just have sparkling apple cider because of Phil's condition. Yeah, we don't want to celebrate it. The drinking problem. Just want to respect his alcoholism. We're going to cancel the blackjack table. And don't bring your kids because Brian will be here. So do not bring your children to work. We are canceling Take Your Kids to Work Day this year. Just FYI. Pop it in. Turn it on. Be a part of the Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or text 949mikey at gmail.com. This is the Mikey Show. More coming up on FM 94.9. It's almost here and it will sell out in advance. FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion presented by Miller Lite. Sunday, June 5th at the Oceanside Pier Amphitheater. Ten great artists on two stages and one wandering ombre playing swampy, heavy-sounding blues. Performing on the...
As always. $1 of every ticket sold will go to the About the Music Fund, which helps to support music education in San Diego County Public Schools. Tickets are on sale now, but they're going fast. Purchase them online at independencejam.com or at fm949st.com. FM 94.9 Independence Jam. Coastal Invasion. Presented by Triple Hops Brewed Miller Lite. Taste greatness. Independence Jam is also supported by Grubbies and Los Tacos. See you on Sunday, June 5th in Oceanside.
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And with a picture of your check on your receipt, you know that your deposit is safe and secure. Now that's a step forward. Thank you. Here's a pound back. Deposit-friendly ATMs from Chase. Take a step forward and chase what matters. Deposits are subject to the fund's availability policy. See a banker for details. JPMorgan Chase Bank N.A., member FDIC. I'm Jeanette. And George. We're fresh and easy neighborhood market customers. This message is by real customers, not celebrities. Saving money we pass on to you. We're Fresh and Easy all the way. You have great fresh products. You save money. I think the integrity of Fresh and Easy is absolutely wonderful because you have all the prepared stuff that doesn't have a whole lot of preservatives, so it just tastes a lot better. Thanks, Fresh and Easy. Thanks, Jeanette and George. Now everyone can save on our new Let's Grill items. Making grilling easy. Try any two for just $10. Prices may vary. See store for details. Cue a grill. Cue the open-enthusiastic chef with the lighter fluid. Cue the steaks, breasts, thighs. Cue the Amigos bearing generous libations. Cue the fumbled bottle of Jose Cuervo. Cue the crowd's gasp. Cue the slow motion dive. Cue the catch. Cue the drink that brings it all together. Cue the Cuervo. Jose Cuervo. Drink responsibly. Jose Cuervo Special Tequila. 40% alcohol by volume. Imported and bottled by Hugh Blind Norwalk, Connecticut. Under license from the trademark owner. Mikey Show. I'm extraordinarily weird. I want the awesomeness of the iPhone.
that you've been talking about. I don't want some dumbed-down version of it. Woods. I have one wish. I wish I wasn't so fast. Yeah, I would say I'm obsessed with Sage. Yeah, I'm obsessed. You are. And Jay. I love to look, but I just don't like to touch. On FM 94.9. I found this guy. He's the greatest. He knows stuff about high-definition video. he's breaking it down for me because I don't know how to take a video camera, an HD video camera, and take footage of it and watch it back in high def. I know that sounds ridiculous, but when you take HD video, it always downgrades. It always downgrades. And so this guy is teaching me how to transfer it in high definition and how to watch it back in high definition. The problem is my...
have to put it onto a Blu-ray, an actual disc, and put it in the player. And what is this of that you're recording? Yeah, are you filming a movie? Yeah, it's got to be like movie footage. My family and stuff. So they have to be in high definition? I would prefer it. Sure. Wouldn't you rather watch your family in high definition rather than not high definition? Yes. I don't know. I don't use the highest setting for my pictures either because I don't need them to be super, you know, I'm not going to do a billboard out of them. Why would you not, though? Because storage, for one thing. Listen, I don't care if I don't pay for the storage. I ain't using up space on a disc. We use 8mm in my house. See them old porn films? That's what I use. I still use 8mm. I got one of them rectangle cameras. And you take the picture and then you slide. Put the film in the back. Yeah. Film is shaped. Like two little zeros. That's right. Sorry, I don't have anything fancy like Polaroid or whatever it is you got. Easy, big time. Sorry, Donald Trump. I don't have a Polaroid. All right. I don't shake my pictures. Sorry. Sorry. I'm not rich. Sorry, stock market. Hey, Ansel Adams, where'd you get the fancy Polaroid? Yeah. If you walk in my house, what it is...
It's a bunch of Etch-a-Sketches on the wall that I did pictures of Maddie and Jasper. We got some watercolors in there. We got the crayons if you wet them. That's right. Jasper, hold still. Left, right, left, right, left, left, left, right, left, left. Jasper. Jasper. Now don't turn it upside down and shake it. Dang it, don't knife me. Your ear's going to disappear. Jerry Seinfeld. Oh, by the way. CreateYourDesignOnline.com. That's our friend Jared. He's got a website called CreateYourDesignOnline.com. On this website, he can make you a website. He can make posters for you. He can do anything graphic design, business cards. He did the new Mikey Show sticker that you're going to be getting on your car in a couple of days. He's incredible. CreateYourDesignOnline.com. Going to tell you about that death adder story and the conclusion of that thing that I watched. Jerry Seinfeld. His website's JerrySeinfeld.com. And all this month, he's kind of celebrating his 30-year anniversary in comedy. And so he's putting up on his website exclusive clips of his favorite stuff. Well, I don't understand why skydivers wear helmets. I mean, can you almost make it?
I think if you jump out of that plane and the chute doesn't open, the helmet is now wearing you. You're protecting the helmet now. Later on, the helmet's talking with the other helmets, going, it's a good thing he was there. I would have hit the ground directly. It's pretty good. Although team loyalty is a kind of hard thing to justify in the end. You know, I love the Giants, but when you think about it, who are the Giants? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? It's different guys. Every year it's different guys. Teams will move from city to city. You're rooting for clothes when you get right down to them. It's the same outfits. I'm rooting for an outfit. That's what it's come down to. I want my team's clothes to be the clothes for me in the city. That's not so bad either. There's nothing really wrong with that. It's laundry. We're rooting for screaming about laundry here. People will...
They'll love a guy. You know what I mean? And then the guy will get traded. He'll come back on another team. They hate him now. Yes, that's right. It's the same human being in a different shirt. Boo, we hate him now. Different shirt. So true. That is so true, man. He kills me. So yesterday I was telling you, I rushed home to watch the conclusion of this. death adder story. I had people texting me yesterday going, what was the name of the show? It's on my phone because I had to text somebody back. My wife got home last night and was like, holy crap, that story about that death adder. She's like, I gotta, you gotta let me know what happened. I'll tell you the name of the show. It was on Animal Planet and the name of the show is La La La. Sorry. Your Worst Animal Nightmares. And
Yeah, so this episode was about this dude that went, he's a young guy, 28 years old, went surfing in Australia. And it was a little island off Australia. Guy picks him up, takes him off the beaten path and tells him, you need to hike, you know, down about 20 minutes. And all he's got with him is a backpack full of a bunch of supplies and a big surfboard and a surf bag. And he takes it down to the beach and he finds this beach that is absolutely pristine. Looks like it's never been touched. He's got the greatest break, and he surfs this thing all day long. At the end of the day, opens up his backpack. He had a foldable fishing rod. He starts fishing. He catches two fish. He's got a little sterno cooker, little tiny pan, takes it, cleans the fish, cooks. He says it was. In fact, he wasn't married. It was the best day of his life.
Up to that point. He didn't have any kids. He wasn't married. It was the best day of his life. It's the summertime. He's by himself. And as night rolls around, it starts to rain. And then it starts to really rain. And he's getting really cold. And he's got on a cotton t-shirt and it's soaking up all the rain. So he takes it off and he uses his surf bag that he puts a surfboard in as a sleeping bag. He's so tired from surfing all day long that he gets into the surf bag. And he falls right to sleep. The problem is, is that in this part of Australia, there's a lot of bullfrogs. And death adders are attracted to the bullfrogs. And when it rains, there is a plentiful supply of them. A death adder is a snake. It is a vicious snake. And when I say vicious, I like, okay, a rattlesnake's vicious. But when a rattlesnake strikes, it strikes once.
It expels a lot of energy. It expels a lot of venom. And usually that does the job and it's done. The death adder can continue to strike. And you know what else is weird about the death adder? It's a foot long. And it is as... Pretend that you took a bicycle tube and over blew it. So you put too, too, too much air into a bicycle tube and it's about to pop. That's how round... The death adder is, but it's only a foot long. And so this thing goes and seeks places that are humid. That's where the bullfrogs are. You know, like this guy's surf bag. So he's sleeping. The death adder goes in there. And when he moves, it strikes. Strikes him in the neck. And then because now he wakes up, he moves, strikes the top of his head. He moves again. it strikes him in the forehead. And he literally grabs the snake and throws it off. And he's terrified because he doesn't know where the snake is and it's night and it's raining and the whole thing. So there's a lighthouse. He climbs up the side of the cliff and he uses his flip-flop wrapped into a towel as a pick because he's losing ground. The sand keeps falling because of the rain.
He's all disoriented. He's disoriented, and plus, you've got to figure, he's got all the venom in him, and his heart's going... Oh, my gosh. Oh, dude. Crazy. And he knows it, and that's playing with his head. So he's thinking, please, please, please, just let somebody be in this lighthouse that has antivenom. So he gets up to the lighthouse, and it's like an old, literally, like an old house. And he's knocking on the door. Please, somebody answer this door. It's raining. He's been bitten. Well, he didn't know that the thing was automated. It had been automated for five years. Nobody had been in this thing. For five years. So he's able to get a signal on his cell phone. One bar calls for help and explains to them that he's been bitten by a snake. And in the middle of explaining to them, it cuts out. He's dying of thirst. Sees a spigot. Goes over to the spigot. He's getting some water. And he decides, I'm going to try in this location. Opens up the cell phone. Holds it up in the air. Sees three bars now. Three bars. calls back to the 911, and they said, don't worry, we got your message and help is on the way. Thank God, he's so happy. But he's still freezing cold now, and the venom is starting to work on him. And so the helicopter arrives, but the helicopter pilot says that even in the best of conditions, landing that airplane or landing that helicopter would have been impossible. In a pouring downpour, no way. They're not doing it. So they left.
And he sees him flying away. And he's like, you've got to be kidding me. And he calls back. And they explain to him, they can't. They can't pick you up because the rain is too heavy. We're going to try to send a ranger. And he's so upset. He throws his phone. He breaks his phone. But imagine yourself in the same position. You've been bitten by a snake. You're upset. Waiting to die. You're waiting to die. So he threw the phone. And then he sees these headlights coming and it is a park ranger. Park ranger puts him in the vehicle, has a little lantern, one of those real high powered LED flashlights. And he looks at him and he says, oh my gosh, this guy's in bad shape. It's so bad that it's actually bleeding. That's how big the fangs were on the snake, that it was actually bleeding. And it's raining, so the blood and the rainwater is mixing together, and it's pouring. So this guy doesn't have any antivenom with him. But he says, you know what? I'm going to use my radio. I know that there's an ambulance service somewhere here. So he calls the ambulance service, and the ambulance service gets there, and they said, we don't have any antivenom. The only people that got antivenom are the people in the helicopter. So they call the helicopter again.
And this guy that's the helicopter pilot is the whitest Australian that I've ever seen named Julio. Julio talks like this. He's white. White, dude. But his name is Julio. And Julio said, I decided, snake bite, I'm going to try to land her. So he did. He landed this thing. Oh, my gosh. Picked the guy up. The guy says, crawling into that, to that helicopter. was the best feeling in his life. And he got into the helicopter and he just collapsed in the helicopter. And the guy said, as soon as they got him into the helicopter, he says, didn't matter what was wrong with him, we were prepared for it. Even if we had to have stayed and we couldn't take off, we could have treated him and he'd be fine. And they did. They treated him on the way to the hospital and dude survived one of the deadliest snake bites you can possibly get. Three of them. Death adder.
To the head. To the head, to the neck, and to the forehead. Think that guy ever wants to sleep outside again? No. Absolutely. I don't think he wants to sleep inside. I mean, how bad does that affect your head? I mean, you just have nightmares about it forever, I would think. That first strike to the throat, I mean, it's petrifying. You think that guy wakes up in the middle, like startles in the middle of the night awake? Yeah, he gets like one little... like flurry on his neck. He's like, yeah! Yeah, you think people like to mess with him? His wife takes a feather and just drapes it across his neck. A rubber snake. Yeah, you think that he's cool with the rubber snake bit? No. Probably not. People give him a fake can of peanuts. He opens it up. Snake pops out. Punches a clown. It's death at her peanuts. Oh, my God. Poor God. Oh, man. That's awesome. He survived, though. Dude, those paramedics, they do some awesome stuff. Speaking of EMTs, CeeLo Green just did this thing for U.S. firefighters that was pretty cool. You're going to like this. He remade his song, Forget You. That's pretty cool. I'll play it for you. It's called Thank You. I have a screw loose to go in for that sort of thing. Call 549. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com.
I got the world by the tail. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes. Yeah, boy. On FM 94.9. San Diego Radio has never mobilized this type of takeover. The prizes are huge. This Saturday, the Mikey Show and M1s take over Qualcomm Stadium from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. Operation Street Impact. The new Mikey Show sticker is in. ready for your ride every car receives a prize we've got a his and her mountain bike from Haro a brand new Ibanez guitar a 42 inch LG plasma with 5.1 surround sound and blu-ray player plus we're adding new prizes daily and did we mention a brand new $24,000 FXDB Harley from San Diego Harley Davidson street impact awesome summer discounts so man up
Hello? Yes, Sally. I am so excited for a new Fox Wednesday. It's the American Idol Top 4 and a brand new breaking in. You're drooling on my screen. Sorry. Idol contestants are battling it out live. It will be a night to remember. The finale's only two weeks away. And then, on Breaking In, their high-tech team will have to team up to bust out of their own office. I don't want to die. I'm too sexy. The Idol top four compete live and a new Breaking In. What more could you ask for, right? A mute button for your pie hole. All new tonight, starting at 8 on Fox 5 San Diego. Then... Free gas makes you dance. Pump it free with... Fox 5 Free Gas. Yep, free gas. Just watch Fox 5 News at 10 every night. Scan the code or go online for your chance to win a $100 gas card.
Fox 5 Free Gas, tonight after Fox on Fox 5 San Diego. Hold on to your hats. The new Ultra Titanium Credit Card is here. This credit card is supercharged. Earn double points, triple points on Monster Monday. Redeem your millions of points for kitchen utensils, yarn, airline flights with two layovers. What's the point of earning a lot of points or miles with a credit card if you can't do anything with them? There's even a coloring book devoted to the human pancreas. With U.S. Bank Flex Perch reward cards, we don't have to send some. Only 20,000 flex points earn up to a $400 airline ticket. $400? On over 150 airlines. Plus, each ticket comes with a $25 allowance for baggage fees, in-flight food, or drinks. $25? You heard me, Mr. Big Voice. Plus, earn quickly and redeem easily for travel, merchandise, or cash back for you or your business. Fantabulous! Stick. Apply at Flexpercs.com or call 800-360-2900. Points go farther with Flexpercs reward cards. All of us serving you, U.S. Bank. U.S. Bank. Stop that. U.S. Bank Flexpercs reward visa credit cards issued by U.S. Bank National Association MD. I am so thirsty. Stranded on an island for nearly three years, what'd you miss the most? The monkeys took good care of me, but I missed Wendy's original spicy chicken sandwich. We got you a spicy chicken sandwich. Oh, I've missed that whole tender chicken filet and Wendy's fiery blend of peppers and spices. This isn't a Wendy's sandwich.
Look at it! The spices aren't right and there's no fresh toppings! After bananas and bugs, anything's a welcome treat, right? Somebody get to Wendy's fast! Wendy's Original Spicy Chicken Sandwich. When only the original will do. You think they're trying to tell us something? What are you zombies hungry tonight? Starving. You don't have to be afraid of the dark anymore. Because now at night you can get the same delicious fresh made taste Wendy's makes all day till midnight or later. Like our crispy chicken sandwich or natural cut fries with sea salt. Both just 99 cents. Tastes great, right? You're so immature. Eat great real late at Wendy's. You know when it's real. At participating Wendy's. What happened last night? I can't find my super big gulp cup. What? You mean the one showing the guy from The Hangover Part 2? We have to find that cup. All right, let's retrace our steps. Okay, well, we started at 7-Eleven, but what happened after that? I think we got kidnapped by a bachelorette party. Oh, yeah, and they made us get tattoos of the bride's name. That explains who Lois is. Hey, why does mine say Antonio? Hola, mi amigos.
No way. He's the dancer who rescued us. Oh, right. And he got us into that killer party at the mansion. Wait. Didn't you get into a fight there with someone's pet monkey? Yeah. I hate that monkey. Hey, he stole the cup. Don't miss out on the action. Get your very own Super Big Gulp cups with exclusive images from The Hangover Part 2 today. Only at 7-Eleven. Collect all five and be sure to check out the movie The Hangover Part 2 in theaters May 26th. A blown tire. Overheated engine. Empty gas tank. There's mayhem on the road. That's why you need roadside assistance. What you don't need is to pay a fee even if you don't use it. Introducing Good Hands Roadside Assistance from Allstate. You'll never pay a dime unless you use it. And it's open to everyone, not just Allstate customers. Go to allstate.com slash roadside to register and get important information.
And the winner of the 33rd Annual Pumpkin Weigh Off is... A 1,524-pound pumpkin. Amazing. Oh, thank you. What's your secret? Frank's Red Hot. I put that s*** on everything. Frank's Red Hot sauce goes on anything. It's aged cayenne peppers that add real flavor to jambalaya, ribs, collard greens, steaks, fries, sausage, onion rings, crab legs, chicken, chili, and even prized pumpkins. Frank's Red Hot sauce. I put that s*** on everything. on everything. Hi, I'm New York Mike of San Diego Harley-Davidson inviting you to join us on Saturday, May 14th for a blessing of the bikes on Mount Soledad. Meet at San Diego Harley-Davidson 5600 Kearney Mesa Road at 9am or go right to Mount Soledad at 10am. We'll bless the riders and those military heroes that died so we can ride and live free. Then we'll celebrate our freedom with plenty of food, music, and entertainment at San Diego Harley-Davidson. The Mount Soledad Memorial, the perfect place to be thankful to God and the war Well, all right then. Well, all right then.
Fuel earnings are limited to up to 35 gallons per purchase. Offer valid through August 31, 2011 at participating Shell Stations. See stores for details or go to www.ralphs.com slash fuelpromotion. Auto Glass Center, now offering new windshields starting at $99 and $25 chip repair. 5955 Mira Mesa Boulevard. Fast and convenient, same-day service with the lowest prices guaranteed. Auto Glass Center, 858-216-4300. 858-216-4300. Ombak and Miller present the biggest beach party of the year. May 14th, it's Ombak's coming-out party with RX Bandits, the Agri-Lights, and 10 more bands, two stages, six DJs, and the Miss Mission Beach Contest. Plus, beer on the beat. Tickets are 15 bucks at onback.org. That's O-M-B-A-C dot org. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I wouldn't like it. I'm not very attractive. Lauren. When I was in college, that was like my M.O. I would get drunk and steal random stuff. Woods. Oh, I want filth. I want straight filth as filthy as it can get. Sienna. Mine are always crying. I'm a crier. And Jay. I have a pond. I built a pond in my yard. On FM 94.9.
You know, I like it more now than I did when it was a hit. Me too. Think that guy's ever worn little purple shoes? Ever purple head to toe? Including the feather in his hair? Think he's ever woken up with the black girl and the white girl in the same bed with him? Yeah. Yes. Absolutely. Think that guy's ever given a foot massage? He's got his technique down and everything. He'll be tickling or nothing. Think anyone's ever called him ma'am? When he was calling... Like a customer service. Exactly. Hello. Hello, ma'am. May I speak to your husband, please? This... I don't have a husband. Can I speak to Prince? This is Prince. Actually, this is when his name was just a symbol, so they didn't know who to ask for. This is... Can I speak to Squiggly Thing? Yeah, this is Squiggly Thing. That's a weird, Squiggly Thing. You sound a lot like Michael Jackson. Yeah. Do I really? Yeah.
Beat it. Why do you hate Michael Jackson? Who? You, Woods. Me, Woods? Yeah. I don't. Every time I do my Michael Jackson voice, it's like you're coming out of your skin. I don't hate me. Yes, you do, Woods. No, I don't. You hate me. I don't hate you. Do you hate? Rest in peace. Do you hate my lucky charm? My lucky charm. It's in my pocket. The cereal? No. What's your lucky charm? The midget black guy with red hair in my pocket. I don't know. It's my lucky chum. I don't know. I don't know what that means. I called him Uncle Philbert. I don't like you, Michael. How come you have such an issue with me? I don't know. My third husband was like that. I hated that guy. That's why I had him stuffed. You didn't have any husbands. Yes, I did. That we knew about. That's why I had him stuffed. Hey, did I mention that I had him stuffed? You're such a turd, man.
You just hate me, Woods. He does. I don't. Please don't. He does. He does. Please don't. Please don't. He does. Please don't. Yeah, let me play this for you. All right, so CeeLo Green did this for firefighters in the United States. It's part of a campaign, a national campaign.