The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 05/18/10
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Tuesday May 18, 2010
Mikey holds frequent dance parties at his house. Jamie provides awesome audio of The Kid sawing logs. Ever “drop a rose”? Sienna has! Body scanners are coming to San Diego along with a lot of small schween jokes. People love taunting the seals in La Jolla, so now there’s a rope. Sienna wishes the seals would leave but those fat bastards aren’t going anywhere. Miss USA’s name is perfect for pole dancing. Mikey has not seen one second of a Padre game yet and the Charger’s put a discounted sale tag on Sean Merriman. What makes a grown man rip his shirt off like a maniac? Lauren didn’t like being referred to as “a lady”, which leads to talk about growing up and being called “Sir”. Yoda gives some ear-hair clipping advice and Mikey explains how to “punish” zits. Mikey’s hilarious dirty underwear falling out of his pants story cracks the cast up. The gang all compare their own underwear, except for Jay, who goes commando. Next is audio of Brett Michaels’ experience of a brain aneurism. This of course leads to some bandana and cowboy hats with hair jokes. Callers call in with more embarrassing under garment follies. LOB admits she has a hard time saying smart things on the spot. An email from a girlfriend who wants her fiancé to stop parking cars and get a “real” job garners a huge discussion. Mikey loved blasting Wilson Phillips back in the day and shedding tears to their songs. Tattoo’s awesome clothing store commercial is heard over the airwaves! What 7 jobs earn women more money than men besides prostitution? Jada Pinkett Smith keeps Will Smith interested with sexy pictures of herself. Mikey makes Lauren blush when he tells the story of her mom doing “other mom” voice and hilarity ensues while Pepper looks for a place to hide. What embarrassing things do your parents do follows. Public marriage proposals from women are just a little too weird but apparently lot’s of chicks do it. Detroit! If you don’t get that reference you need to be a better M1.
Bumper Music
seal rope barrierMiss USA pole dancingTylenol probeage perception and cardinghouse of cards anecdoteembarrassing clothing mishapsBroken Bells concertmom impersonation bitseal ropetylenol recalllauren obrien cardedhouse of cards
The episode covered the La Jolla seal rope‑barrier vote and the Miss USA pole‑dancing scandal, discussed the FDA’s Tylenol probe after children’s medicine recalls, featured Lauren O’Brien being carded and talking about feeling young, included a humorous house‑of‑cards anecdote with a girl named Dana, highlighted Marsha’s embarrassing pantyhose story at a church basement, previewed Broken Bells’ live performance at Humphreys, and showcased Lauren’s mom’s recurring "other mom" bit where she pretends to be a second mother on the phone.
What happened, in order
Rope barrier rally & Miss USA controversy
Hundreds protested for a year‑round rope at La Jolla children’s pool after the city council voted 6‑2 to keep it, while Miss USA Rima Fakiih faced backlash over pole‑dancing photos.
Miss USA pole‑dancing details
The show described how Rima Fakiih won a radio‑station stripper contest, posed in tiny shorts and a tank top by a pole with money in her bra, sparking debate over her past.
Tylenol probe after children's medicine recall
The FDA widened its investigation into Johnson & Johnson’s McNeil plant after finding dirty, duct‑taped equipment and incorrect concentrations in children’s Tylenol, Motrin and Benadryl.
Lauren O'Brien gets carded
Lauren recounts being asked for ID at a meet‑and‑greet and later at a grocery store, highlighting how youthful she looks despite nearing 30.
House of cards with Dana
Mikey tells how he invited a girl named Dana over to build a house of cards instead of doing typical hangout activities, revealing his dorky side.
Marsha's pantyhose mishap
Marsha describes how a piece of her pantyhose kept slipping out of her pants while she talked to a child at a church basement, becoming increasingly embarrassing as she climbed stairs.
Broken Bells coming to Humphreys
The hosts announce that the new band Broken Bells will perform live at Humphreys on Tuesday, May 18th with special guests the Morning Benders.
Lauren's mom 'other mom' bit
Lauren explains her mother's recurring gag where she pretends to be an 'other mom' on the phone, a bit Lauren says she’s inherited and uses off‑air.
People mentioned
MikeyWoodsyLauren O'BrienSiennaJayJamie WoodsRebeccaDanaMarshaVanessaMean GeneRima FakiihMojo Nixon
41,305 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
KBCT San Diego, the Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. So much. Have you guys seen the commercial on TV that's using the Willy Wonka song? Da da da. Yes. I love that song. Me too. Every time I hear it. I'm singing it the rest of the day. You know what? I know what I actually thought yesterday when I was watching that commercial. What? I was like, I think that would be a good song to sing to the baby. I need to learn that. It would. Oh, it's a creepy song to sing to the baby. No. It's a happy song. It's a good song to sing to your baby. Life is good. You know what's a good one? What? Mother by Danzig. It's a really good one. I don't know that song. Weird. We just played it like five minutes ago. It was great. Let me tell you. My wife does little parodies.
She does. Yeah, she does little parodies to the boys. And they're brilliant. Like, I always go, that's pretty funny. She'll go, your Luke is on fire. And she sings it to them. I do that to my niece. You do? It's a good bit. It's a good bit. She sings it to them. We also did a dance party the other day at Mike's house that I guess is a Rebecca bit, isn't it? Which one? The dance party. Oh, yeah, yeah. And then she also does fishing, where she pretends Jake is a fish, and she reels him in, and then she throws him back onto the couch. Brilliant. It's so funny. Wait, Mike, you dance? Oh, yeah. He danced in his chair. You partake? In his chair? In his chair. Only then. He was in his throne, and he decided... Only at that time. Yeah. He had just got done making some guacamole, weird. And made some carne asada. Weird. And we had dinner. And then we had a dance party over there. Wow, I missed out. Did you dance with us? I did. You did? I did. Did you bring your dogs? No. They couldn't come to Mike's. No, they can't come to Mike's. He'll freak out. Yes. I love them, but they scare me because I don't want to step on them. They run right around your feet with their little dogs. That's the honest truth.
I mean, I'm being completely serious. Like, they are the sweetest things in the world. I just get nervous that they're right under my feet. I kicked Lucky in the face last night on accident. How bad do you feel when that happens? I do that with my dog, too. He's my best friend. I felt really bad. You call those Velcro dogs. They stick right to your feet. Welcome to the program. It's Mikey Show. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. And I'm 39. Woodsy is 34. And he is our sports guy. He's got the contacts in today. He doesn't have the glasses rocking. I'm so tired of my glasses. I could scream. Yeah? Yeah. Done. We got to get you hooked up with that LASIK stuff. That'd be great. No, I mean? I'd love to get some LASIK. Lauren O'Brien is the blondie over here to the right. What up? Sienna is our news girl. And she's sitting over here to my left. She's got on a little gray sweater today. And then we got our boy Jay, who is... Our producer, separated by glass in the next room, 46 years of age. Somebody asked yesterday, why do you tell the ages? So that you know we paint a picture for you. You know and can relate to who you're listening to. Gives you an idea about where they are in life. Would you guys like to hear audio that was sent to me by Jamie Woods? Oh. Woods' wife. What is it?
She taped him snoring. Oh, Jamie, you're the best. Wow. Want to hear it? I think about doing this all the time. Yes, of course we want to hear it. My wife thinks about doing that to me. I am bad. Here we go. It's worse. Hold on. I would suffocate you. Wow. She should pour water in your nostril. You know what? I actually imagined you snoring worse than that. Me too. Like a bear. When he stayed, when he came to visit San Diego with his friend Bark Malman, Bark had to get a different room at the W because of this. Because I'm sure it gets heavier if you've been having some adult beverage. Now I have to get Todd's because he has the weirdest snore. It's like... Really? I'm like, how do you breathe? Like, I'm short of breath even demonstrating it. I do the event too where I go...
It's like, are you alive? She's like, are you dying? I'm like, huh? I sleep like an angel. Really? Strangely enough. In a perfect town. I'm not a snorer. I don't snore. I'll toot in my sleep. So do you. Everyone does. Everybody does. That's the one time I tooted in front of Todd. I was sleeping and I woke myself up. Wow. So you tooted so loud you woke yourself up? Well, yeah. I think I was just like just falling asleep and like getting comfortable. Don't say toot. I gotta leave. Tooting is better than fart. Yeah, fart's weird. My grandma said to always say you dropped a rose. You dropped a rose? I like that. I just got something on my teeth. No, you don't fart. You drop a rose, Sienna. That's repugnant. No, it's so dainty. It's so dainty and cute. Feminine. Toot. 570-1949. Call us right now, and you can talk about anything you want. Obviously. Yeah, why not? We do. We do, yep. 949mikey at gmail.com is our text.
There's all kinds of stuff happening in the news today, one of which is the body scanners are coming to San Diego's Lindbergh Field. It's our airport here, Woods. Why are you clapping? Why are you clapping at that, Woodsy? Safety. Yeah? I don't worry about the airport. Safety. Since when are you captain safety? Captain of the safe team. I don't need people. Taking pictures of my stuff. Kid's proud of his stuff. Are you? Yeah, let it flow. It's just another difference between you and I. Fair enough. I'm not so proud. I'll go through a separate room and get scanned manually. Yeah. I'll just, you know, as long as I can put a piece of steel over my not so proud of my stuff. Let me wrap a cucumber in tinfoil. It's an amadillo. It's an amadillo. That would be even worse. What if you got caught doing something like that through the scanner? I know, right? It's like, I'm going to need you to remove that cucumber, my friend. Nice try. You need to leave that here. That's hot. No, it isn't. It's crazy. That's crazy. Yes, well, we San Diegans can expect the scanners to be at Lindbergh Field this summer. Hey.
Get ready. Each scanner costs about $200,000, and they're spending, the Transportation Security Administration is spending $3 billion to place them all around the country at airports. Yeah! Yes, and the images taken by the scanners highlight some objects you may not want highlighted to the public. Yeah, of course they do. Yeah, like bombs, guns, knives, pistols. Well, yeah, well, they're searching for bomb-making materials, but they also can show your junk. Yeah, and they've already had stories of people that were trying to be funny. Working there. Working there. Showing each other. One guy was getting made fun of so bad, he worked at the airport in Detroit or something like that. Detroit. Yeah, Detroit. And one of his coworkers saw him walk through the scanner and saw how small his little you-know-what is. And everyone started making fun of him. His what? His what? You-know-what. His peace. I what? Yeah, and the guy got so mad because of the insults that he attacked his co-workers and he got taken to jail. Hey, look who's coming. Tiny's here. Really? Not only does he have a small piece, but then he got sent to jail. You guys have me cracking up all the time. Great. That's exactly what I need. I don't have enough issues. I got to worry about them taking pictures of my private junk. Hey, isn't that Mikey from the radio?
If you don't want to go through. Death. Yeah, I'll tell you what the alternative is. Greyhound. No, there's got to be a way that you say like. Maybe you say you're pregnant. I decline. Can pregnant women go through? Yeah, I decline. I decline. If you are pregnant or if you have like a metal plate in your head, you know. No, I decline. Okay, great. You're not going to Phoenix today. Yeah. No problem. No, there's got to be another way. No way. They hand you a little piece of paper that has directions on how to get to the train depot. No way. Why don't you take a Wells Fargo carriage? You would probably need to have a written, like, really legit explanation because so many people would try to get out of it and it would just cause long lines and so much confusion. I doubt they're going to scan everybody, right? That's true. They're going to pick people. Like, Mike, you'll get scanned for sure. And really, your body's that different that it's going to look so different than anybody else? Yes, very different than yours, Jay. Very different than yours. But what if I'm against having that scanning stuff done to me? Because I'm like, I don't know what that is. You may be against having somebody pat you down, but that doesn't mean that they're not going to pat you down. That's security, too. That's not going to give me a brain tumor for somebody to pat me down. Oh, boy. No, but if you said, I'm sorry, you can't pat me down, they'd be like, okay, sorry, you ain't coming to the concert. You use a cell phone, don't you? It's different, though. You use a cell phone, don't you? Yeah. It might give you brain. It's different. Really?
I'm going to be taking a horse and buggy to Atlanta. I don't know what this body scanner is. I'm just saying hypothetically. I want to go on a horse and buggy ride. What is that, Mike? What is that? Thank you. I want to go on a horse and buggy ride. What is that? Why is my skin crawl on a horse and buggy ride? Is it tiny too? What is that? Is that your mom? It's not my mom. It's one of Rebecca's songs she sings to the kids. Horse and buggy ride. Oh my gosh, that is creepy. That is. Longtime M1s may recognize Horse and Buggy Ride. I love it. From Tim and Eric. Nice show. Great job. I think I have seen that before. It's really, it's on YouTube, isn't it? Yeah, but it's a TV show. TV show on Adult Swim. Anyway, I'm not going to... It's both hysterical and creepy at the same time. It sounds it. I'm not going to cause a stir and probably not do it. I'm just saying.
You should be able to refuse it. You should. Yeah. I don't want that. Don't look at that. It's not yours. It's mine. I don't want you to see it. I'm embarrassed of it. It's just part of the body. Everyone has one. It's a skin, man. Everybody has one, but they all look different. So when you go to your doctor, you go, nope, you can't look at that. Nope. I do not. But girls have to display theirs on a daily basis. Girls have to do a lot worse than that at the doctor's office. Yeah. You know, the doctor, though, the doctor that sees that, he's not some dude that works at the airport behind a little scan. My doctor has never pointed and laughed. Maybe in his head. Oh, he has. Oh, he has. Well, just in case you don't know, the body scanners don't show your face. So that's one of their things that's like, look, they can't identify who you are. You can't see the face on the screen. They can just see your body. I don't like it. I'm just worried about the x-ray vision going through my organs. I am. Weird. What about the seals in La Jolla? They're going to...
do something with the seals in La Jolla? Are they going to put up a fence or something? Yeah, well, this is something that I swear will never be solved. It's a battle that's been going on for decades. And they've had a rope barrier keeping the public away from the seals. So no one can go onto the beach during pupping season. So when the little pups are born, no one can go down there. But pupping season ended on Saturday. So the ropes were taken away. Pupping season ended on Saturday. Yeah. Think about this for a second. Think about this for a second. Now, we kind of know when the seals stop with their, you know, nurturing and the feeding of the young or whatever. Do you think that the seals on Saturday said, oh, good, it's the 14th, we're done. Yeah, the 15th. Yeah, we can clock out, we're all done. It goes December 15th to May 15th is pupping season. They have a big seal calendar. Yep. Does that mean I can put my club away now? Pupping season is over. Oh, Jay. Jason. Well. So outrageous. You're such a shock jock. Oh, wow. Ladies and gentlemen. So the ropes were removed on Saturday, and apparently, I don't believe this, but apparently there were people that were seen taunting the seals, and this just caused quite a commotion. How were they taunting? I don't know. Well, you can see on the cover of the UT, there's a picture of a guy lying down next to a seal.
But he's not taunting the seal. I've seen people go to the seal. Yeah, but you would do that to a horse at a farm, too. That's taunting, though. Do you see? We're just kids. We're just little kids. There's dudes going, like, really, dude? You're 29. You work at a law office. Just because you're out here in a polo right now doesn't mean... It's time to be a little kid. Why when, like, why when I go to the zoo do I go watch the monkeys and I'm like... Like, I make noise. I look at them. Or birds. I'm like... I know, because you want them to respond to you. Or like a little squirrel. I'm like... Whatever that is. I go like this to all of them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We all have our thing because we're all little kids. You're going to look at me and be like, you're the one. I want to go home with you. I walked in the zoo and I went... Raise the arm. Now, this rope is going to keep people away from the seals. The seals, yeah. It shows that humans cannot go down there. It's a very sophisticated system. It is. No one goes down there, though, because there's always cops around, and there's a lifeguard tower right there.
I walk by it almost every day, and it's just annoying. Over the weekend, there was a big rally. Mom! There was a rally with protesters calling for the rope to be brought back. So last night, the San Diego City Council voted 6-2 in favor of keeping up a rope barrier year-round at the children's pool in La Jolla. And hundreds of people showed up for this thing. Wow. That's amazing. So for now, there's... Guess it's going to be a rope-up year-round until the next meeting. A rope. Oh, yeah. A rope. And the proposal also includes hiring a full-time park ranger to be there. I'd do that. To protect the seals. I'd do that. I mean, what? That'd be rad. No. Park ranger job? To protect the seals with a gun? Yep. I just, oh, it's like, that was my beach growing up. They're seals. They're sweet. Yeah, they belong in the ocean. What's the deal with the Miss USA lady? You haven't seen these pictures? No, I know there's a controversy. Something happened. Well, she was crowned on Sunday night, Miss USA, Rima Fucky. Oh, my God. You get so nervous. I'm reading her name. How would you pronounce it? F-A-K-I-H. That's how you say it. F-A-K-I-H. That's what I'm saying. Easy word. It's just a name.
Name of the newly crowned Miss USA. Well, she was crowned Miss USA on Sunday night. And as of yesterday, pictures of her have hit the Internet of her doing some pole dancing. Yeah, she was. She was taking a class. She won a radio station stripper 101 contest in Detroit three years ago. Detroit. Yes. We've had a lot of Detroit stories so far. Big player on this show. And this radio station, of course, was like, wanted to get in on the action. So they put the photos back online. And she's fully clothed on the stage. But she's wearing like these little, little tiny shorts and a tank top. And she's photographed in front of a stripper pole. And she has money stuffed in her bra. You know what? So what? She looks a little ridiculous, though. It's not that big a deal. Well, the thing is, the thing is, is that there's never going to be a Miss America or Miss Universe or Miss anybody. I just showed Woods. That doesn't have something in their past. Of course. That doesn't exist. Yeah. She's wearing like what I would wear to the gym. It's not even bad. I showed Woods this picture of her dancing by the pole and Woods mouthed, ooh, mamacita. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Isn't that what everybody's grandfather says? Ooh, mamacita. Only your grandfather. That's right. Not ours.
Channel 95.5 in Detroit. Detroit. Seattle. I don't think it's bad at all. I know this. I know this, dude. You do? Yeah, Mojo. Oh, yeah, it is Mojo. Yeah, I know Mojo. Mojo Nixon? It's the radio guy. Mojo in the morning. Yeah. You know some clown was sitting around with this picture going, oh, I hope she wins. Oh, I hope she wins. There it is. That's not even that bad. She might as well be in. An aerobics class. Yeah. The contest was held in 2007. So it was a few years ago. Big deal. That's a story, by the way. That's a story. I know. It's a top story. It's everywhere right now. Welcome to the United States, pal. This is why I haven't run for Miss USA. That's right. Pictures out there. Too much in your background. Yeah, exactly. Maybe a couple VCR tapes floating around. Way too much. Pictures surface of her eating a hamburger. Under a cloak. Yeah. She's got a cloak on her head and she's like nibbling. Sloppy Joe all over my face. I love it. It's so awesome. Just littering. Littering. Littering. Yeah.
Walking a dog, leaving the poop. Leaving the poop. 570-1949 or 949-Mikey at gmail.com if you prefer to text message us. What's up with that chef that we were talking about yesterday from the Food Network that was arrested for murder? for hire. He's trying to hire a homeless guy. Yeah. Well, he was in criminal court in LA yesterday and he pled not guilty to attempted murder and solicitation of murdering during his arraignment moments. Right. And a bail was set for $2 million. Yeah. Maybe a homeless guy randomly picked this guy from Food Network. I know. You know what I mean? Yeah, he's been charged with solicitation of murder and attempted murder and faces life in prison. Yeah, if you didn't hear that story, this guy from the Food Network went up to a couple homeless guys and wanted to hire them to kill someone. We don't know who. Apparently, that person has been notified that Juan Carlos Cruz did want to kill them. But the name hasn't been released yet. What's the deal with the Tylenol probe? And is this the...
Baby. This is the baby stuff. The baby stuff? Yeah. We've switched to all generic brand. Have you? With our infants. Well, yeah. The FDA has widened their Tylenol probe. First things first. On May 1st, Johnson & Johnson recalled like 50 different versions of children's. non-prescription drugs like Tylenol, Motrin, and Benadryl. Then on May 6th, the FDA issued a 17-page inspection report about the plant. They went to the plant and checked out all the stuff. And I told you guys that a lot of the machines that they used were duct taped together. They were really dirty. I mean, just not up to par. So now the FDA is conducting a company-wide investigation of McNeil's manufacturing practices to determine whether similar problems exist throughout the company and what additional steps the agency must take to ensure that these problems... don't occur again. Right, because when you think about it, if you're Tylenol, it's got to affect more than just the baby stuff you make, right? Oh, yeah. So let me get this straight. The equipment was dirty and filthy and faulty on the baby making stuff, but not on the adult Tylenol. Yeah, right. Everything else is pristine.
Yeah, come on. And just in case you don't know why the children's medicine was recalled, it's because some of the children's products may contain incorrect concentration of ingredients, ingredients that don't meet testing requirements, and tiny metal particles in the medicine. This is the liquid form. Yeah, they were finding little black flakes. Yeah, in the children's Motrin and stuff. How awful. They gotta be black flakes, dude. They don't have to be. Yeah. They don't have to be. What's up with that? What's up with that? Today, Jay's picking the music, Alice in Chains, Sick Man. Is this new Alice in Chains? No, this is old. This is off dirt. It is? So, what makes a grown man stand up in his living room, literally rip his shirt off? I don't mean take his shirt off in a way that's like, I'm ripping it off. No, I don't mean that. Like Incredible Hulk? I mean tearing, ripping his shirt off. and run around the house screaming. What makes a grown man do that? Drugs? No. I won't tell you his name, but his initials are Steve Woods. Why am I not surprised? We'll explain coming up next. People are going to like this. The Mikey Show. It's a good time, you know what I mean? Call 570-1949 or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9.
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This report is brought to you by CarMax. The easiest way to sell your car is to take it to CarMax today for a free appraisal. The smart choice is CarMax, the way car buying should be. Headed through National City, the 5 northbound Harbor Drive. There is an accident over on the right shoulder. It's an SUV and a car. Looks like CHP is on the scene. Some congestion, though, in that area. As well as Escondido on the 15 southbound between the 78th and 9th Avenue. Stop and go. And that bridge is kind of tied up here in both directions on the 5 between the toll plaza. Stop and go traffic. issued a traffic advisory right now. This report also brought to you by McDonald's. It's back. Quench your thirst for less at McDonald's for a limited time. Choose from a variety of 42-ounce icy cold soft drinks, only 79 cents. That's a lot of refreshment for very little change. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. Uh, I can't do anything. I can't do anything here at all. Woods. I got one word for you, dude. Get Lauren. I will take like a half an hour to get out of bed and be like, no. And Jay. Of course, I have an outrageous story on FM 94.9. Dog a bone. Reminds me of when I used to do, imitate my mom singing ACDC stuff. Oh, yeah? Nobody's mom would always redo the arrangement on a song. Moms never sang it like it was. It was always, you know, very sweet. They sweetened it. The moms are sweet. That's what they do, right?
If you'd like to know what makes a grown man stand up in his living room and rip his shirt, actually tear his shirt off of his body, you'll find out right now. We're going to get to that story in a minute. But first, the Padres continue to own the Giants. They shut them out last night, moving to seven. An O against their division rivals. The Giants are great for the Padres. Oh, yeah. Every season, they're good for them. Clayton Richard was great. He held the Giants to one run on three hits in seven innings. Gonzo went yard. Chase Headley and Kyle Blanks had RBIs. Game time tonight, 7.05. Padres are in first place still. Wow.
So get. It's May 18th. Padres are in first place. Let's do this. Let's do it. I'm in. All right. Are you? No, I'm telling you, I decided you got me into it. Did I? You talked me into it. How many innings have you watched? 18. Zero. None. None. None. You've watched none innings. Listen, I can't, though. I can't. Yes, you can. I can't, Woods. I'm not. I can't watch. I got to go to sleep. No, it isn't that. I literally cannot. I have DirecTV. And if you have direct TV, you can't watch Padre games. Why? You have nine laptops. Pick a laptop. You can't watch it. MLBTV.com, $25.95 a month. They will black out Padre games if you don't have Cox Cable or Time Warner. Listen to it on the radio. That's silly. That's an option. That is an option. I could do that. You're going to get so many emails of people telling you where to watch it now. How to do it. Yeah, exactly. Really? Yeah. Oh, yeah. How to watch it? I'm sure. It's got to be a way. We've discussed it before. They have an exclusive deal with Cox Cable, which also leases out to Time Warner. So if you have Time Warner or Cox, you can watch games. They have an exclusive deal with them. If you have Dish Network or DirecTV, you can't watch Bodger. That sucks. Word around town, Miguel, is that the Chargers have lowered their asking price for Sean Merriman. Really?
Says they're looking for a second-round pick in 2011 for the former All-Pro linebacker. I also read that they've tried to trade him three times. Why? But that his contract demands keep getting in the way. He has recently switched agents from Tom Condon to David Dunn in hopes of making a trade happen. Really? Yeah, dude. You know, I'm not from here originally. I know the guy. I know. How good he is. I don't know why you would trade him. If somebody would fill me in, please let me know. I can fill you in. Fill me in. Why you're going to trade him? Yeah. I'm going to trade him because he had a tear in his knee that was repaired. And that is an iffy repair. When he came back, he was not necessarily the monster that he was before the tear. Many believe that he will regain that level of play. He has not as of yet. He's 26. He's 26, and the Chargers may be concerned that he isn't going to take the same form that he did his rookie season and the season after that. That's it. That's it. Okay, fair enough. Also, Kobe Bryant went off last night in Game 1 of the Western Conference Finals against the Suns. He scored 21 in the third quarter alone on his way to 40 for the game.
Lakers beat the Suns 128-107. Here is his coach, Phil Jackson, speaking very passively, passive-aggressively about his Lakers team, cut one. By the points we scored, obviously. We're not that high-powered an offensive team. You know, we're in the lowly hundreds as an average team, not in the 110s like the Phoenix Suns. But obviously the pace, you know, we got involved in the pace and kept playing and got some easy baskets towards the end of the game. Fill me in here, Woodsy. What's he really saying? Oh, we don't score like the high-powered sons do, but we still managed to win. He's brilliant. Kobe was being guarded by Grant Hill, who's about 60, so that probably helped him a little bit. I wasn't familiar with this gentleman until yesterday, but I sat in traffic for about an hour and a half and learned a lot about Bob Breitbart. He was a San Diego native. He passed away. He was the founder of the San Diego Hall of Champions Sports Museum. which is in Balboa Park. He also owned the San Diego Gulls, who were a Western Hockey League franchise. So he passed away. He was 91 years old. Well, there was a pure feeling of unadulterated joy at the kids' house last night. Weird. What are you going to say? Yankee Sox was last night again.
And somebody had written me on Facebook like, doesn't this ever get old for you? And I said, absolutely not. It's the greatest rivalry in sports. I defy you to tell me anything different. The Yankees blew a couple of really big leads. So I'm on Facebook. I'm getting hammered after they blow their leads. And I mean hammered. Which, by the way, Woodsy doesn't understand. He's like, I don't play for the Yankees. No, I understand. I understand. But they're like, ha-ha, every pitch. They're like, do you see that? That was a strike. Really? You see that? That's because you do the same thing. I absolutely do not. I absolutely don't. You're a fun guy. You mean on Facebook? I don't. On Facebook, you do not. Yeah, I don't. They, every hit, they were like, yeah! And it was driving me nuts. Didn't you respond, though? Of course I responded. Yes. You're the same person. You poke the tiger, you're going to get bit. Okay, well. Okay, all right, quiet. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. He's getting upset. So we get to the ninth inning. The Yanks are down by two runs. And I'm like, I actually talked to LOB. I'm like, damn it. The Yanks are down two runs. Jonathan Papelbon, or Krapelbon, came in in the ninth. And he's one of the best closers in baseball. And I'm like, man, I don't think we can do it. But I'm like, there's a little bit of hope. Brett Gardner singles. A-Rod steps to the plate. It's a two-run bomb to tie it. So I am an inch from my TV screaming expletives.
At the TV. As loud as I possibly can. So then Papelbon decides, I'm kind of a D. So I'm going to go after the Yankees catcher. And he throws at his head and hits him. Puts him on base. Up to the plate steps Marcus Thames. He's a journeyman outfielder that we picked up. What is happening right now? He steps to the plate. Papelbon fires. Cut two. It is high. It is far. It is gone. It's a game winner. Marcus Timms hits up bottom of the ninth. Two out. One ball. Two run home run. Marcus Timms helps the Yankees win. Ball game over. Yankees win. That's in the ninth. Not a dry eye in our audience. Woods, I have a question. Hold on. You just got, wow, I saw it. L-O-B. I think she just got shells. She did.
I don't think she did. I don't think she did. I think she did, yeah. Four runs in the night for the victory. Feast on that. That is Woods on sports. Okay. You sure you're done savoring the moment? Woods, if the Red Sox were to have won that, would you have even told the story? No. That's why people are trash talking you on Facebook, dude. You ask for it. Hey, when they get their own radio show and they have their own second, they can talk about whatever the hell they want. They just want you to be fair. I ripped my shirt completely off. I was waving it around my head. And I'm running, running down the hallway, screaming. Jamie gets on the stairs and starts doing the... Can-can dance or whatever. I thought Jamie would be in a helmet hiding in the other room. She was ecstatic. That's fantastic. Imagine that scene. I talked to Woods at, I don't know, maybe 7 o'clock. Yeah. And he was telling me, yeah, a bunch of clowns. They're lighting me up on the boards. I'm not talking about this tomorrow. I don't care. It's called Woods on Sports. I'll let you do that every time the Yankees win. Thank you. That's why I love you, Mike. Really, Mike? It's kind of funny. It's annoying. Is it? Yes. I'm annoyed.
I don't know. When you get that. It was so dramatic. Every time. There's 160 games. It is high. It is far. It is gone. It's a game winner. Marcus Timms hits a bottom of the ninth. Two out. Walk off. Two run home run. Marcus Timms helps the Yankees win. Ball game over. Yankees win. No! Maybe I take a nap during Donald Duck Theater or Sienna Sings then. It's a weak bit. I support you guys. You support your boy. This is not you. This is not you, dude. This is me. I bleed. I bleed blue. You know that. Let me tell you something. All I can think about is first time going in that stadium seeing those Yankees play. That's right. Me and my old man watching a World Series victory together. You've got to go to the camera. You've got to see the camera right now. Go to MikeyShow.com.
and click on the camera so you can see in the studio. This is outrageous. I am... It's fantastic. Yeah, what happened? Let me read you something. Did I just dream that whole thing? That was the greatest sports segment in the history of radio. I hope that was a dream. No, it was not. I'm so sorry if you're a Red Sox fan. Or a Padres fan. I appreciate it. Yeah, the Padres were the... Lead story. Absolutely. The lead story. Did you play a nice instrumental for them? I didn't have any clips. I didn't have any clips. Weird. If they wanted to walk off like that, I would have knocked it out of the park. You know that. Okay. Shut it. Now take a listen to this. See what you guys think of this. Object. Right now. L.O.B. says. This is from her. That she's perfect? Does her recap just say, I'm perfect, I'm perfect, I'm perfect, I'm perfect, I'm perfect. No, it doesn't say it over and over. It just says it once. Says it one time. Says, hey, Mikey, just want you to know I'm perfect, period. Woods sucks. I'm perfect. No, listen to this. She says, Friday at the meet and greet, I got carded when I ordered my Guinness. Yeah. You know it. She says, I was stoked. Mikey even said to me, you're going on 30 and you just got carded? Which is the truth. I was like, really?
She's getting carded? I was pumping my fists in the air. I was real happy. You look really young, Lauren. You do look young. Well, you're riding that tricycle. Pigtails. Yeah, in fairness, they asked how old you were, and you held your hands up and said, I'm this many. Yeah. Sweet. Well, but then she got sort of dropped back to earth yesterday. She sure did. She was out there. Now, I'm going to ask people, too. You ever had this happen? Dudes, women, doesn't matter if you're a guy or a girl. If you've had this happen. Yesterday, she's at the grocery store. And she hears a woman say to her little boy, watch out for the lady. Oh, man. Referring to you. She looked around the aisle to see who this woman was talking to. Said lady. Yeah, because obviously she wasn't talking about this diminutive young woman. That just got carded. That just got carded. Obviously not. Yeah, this practically a teenager over here. This girl that's considering going to a prom or something. She looks around, realized, no, she's the lady. Do you remember when you went from being a kid to a lady, or all of a sudden you were that man? Yeah. I'm still the kid. Yeah. But you could be that man to somebody at the grocery store. With this mustache, maybe. Yeah. Let me tell you. I have not been...
that young man or that guy for a long time you're a guy pardon me sir no yes no no no i'm not a guy i am now and have been for a long time watch out for the man and i'm like i'm looking around for my dad yeah i know i didn't think i'd ever be able to pinpoint the moment but what would you have liked her to say the girl Yep. Girl would have been a lot better than a lady. Thought I was a girl. Better than like old bag. Not yet a woman. You have any gray hair? I found one. You did? Yeah, I found one like a couple months ago. Luckily, I have blonde hair, so it just blends right in. Yeah, you blondes are, you have it easy. I found it. You blondes are easy. You have it easy. That's what I heard. That too. Well. Just kidding, just kidding. 570. Just kidding. Are you? 570-1949. If you are a guy or a girl, you've experienced this. You've experienced going into the realm of, yeah, it's happened. I'm not a kid anymore. It's a sad day because I was feeling a little down on myself, you know, 30 coming up. And then Friday at the meet and greet, I got carded in. I was like, what's age? It's just a number. I still look like a kid. Feeling all good about yourself. And then this, you know.
Grocery store incident. They're like, move it, your old bag. Be the bag. Right? Pardon me, little old lady? Yeah. Yeah. Ma'am, do you need help out with your bags? Little old lady. You haven't had that happen. LOL instead of L-O-B. You haven't had that happen, right? No. She looks 14. Me? Oh, I feel like I look old. No way. No. What makes me mad is people always, like girls, this bothers me. They call me, hey, hon, or sweetie. I'm like, what am I, five? You don't like that? No. Are you kidding? That is a sign of youth. I think it's, I like when guys say it, not when girls say it. Really? See, L-O-B is the opposite. I know. If I was like, oh, thanks, sweetie. She'd be like, really, you chauvinist pig? No way. I'd be like, I am sweet. No, you wouldn't. Yeah, I would. Oh, wow. That's L-O-B. That's me singing from a mountaintop. Yeah. M1Michael from La Jolla. Hey, Mikey. Have you gotten the sir or man or any of that yet? Yes, it's a totally sad thing. I'm 42, and it's kind of one of those things where you always want to grow up and be old like your dad or something like that, and then suddenly you become it. And you're like, ah, everyone calls me sir all the time, and I'm really only 42 years old. Yeah. I blogged about it one time and said, you know, I...
Definitely got into a headspace where I said, I am not any part of a young lion anymore. I had to come to terms with the fact that I was not ever going to be the prowling lion again. That from this point on, I've now gone into wise lion years. I now have the wise whiskers instead of the young rippling, which I never really had. Rippling biceps? Yeah. I'm like a tweener. You are? I feel like a tweener. I'm so far from wise, but I feel like I learn a little bit more every day. And I'm getting, I know a lot more than I did when I was 22. You knew me when I was 24. Yeah. Different kids sitting in front of you. Yeah, for sure. You got any gray? Yeah, I got some gray in the beard. Me too. Oh, grizzle beard? Yeah, grizzle beard. I like to consider myself wise, even though I'm young. Wise for your years. I'm wise behind my age. An old soul. An old soul. 570-1949. Jay's a wise sage. Yeah. 949mikey at gmail.com. Well, back in my day. Wise old sage. I got a little gray hair. When I turned 40, everything kind of changed because that was, I think, the last time I got carded. Oh, you got carded at 40? I got carded at 40. And I was like, really?
And they're like, yeah, you know, just check. It was kind of dark. You can't count on that. The light was just right. Didn't you get carded at Coachella, Jay? Everybody does, I think. Yeah, I think everybody does. Just the fact that he was at Coachella, though, proves that he's not really an old man. That was a blast. Didn't you get carded at Miley Cyrus, Mike? Yeah, got carded at the Miley Cyrus concert trying to buy a t-shirt. They're like, hey, creep. Mike, you really, you do not look like you're about to turn 40, though. Are you kidding me? Oh, I am one of, I swear I'm not being nice. You have a very young skin. It's probably all the facials. That's true. The lady that gave me the facial said that I look like I was 33 or whatever, and Rebecca goes, ah! She goes, babe, really? Do you buy that stuff? Don't you realize what they're doing? I'm like, really? She's lying? You've already paid her. She's like, you are so sweet. They've never lied to me. I think they're telling the truth. They were probably like, you have the skin of a 33-year-old. Have you been using our moisturizer? That must be what it is. Of course I have. Really? M1 Keith from Carlsbad. Hey, good morning. What's up? So, I'm 41.
My son's 13, and I lost it about two weeks ago. I took all his buddies skateboarding, and I was skateboarding. And then when he dropped me, I dropped all the boys off. They were all saying, thank you, Mr. Smith, for the ride. Oh, my gosh. It was like, God, you've got to be kidding me. I just went skateboarding and, you know. Like, bros, call me Keith. Yeah. You know what the worst part of that must be, Keith, is that. If you're anything like me, you probably, in your mind, you were like, you know what's cool is that I'm still considered cool. Like, my kids think I'm cool. And then you realize, like, no, they don't. They think we're dorks. Yeah. We think we're cool. And what's funny about it is you think back to your own dad and you're like, remember when your dad thought he was cool and you were like, you're so not cool. Now we think we're different. We've figured it out. We're not like our dad. We're actually cool. We have the Internet. Right, we got the internet. I heard Jay's son's friends call him Mr. Isbell when we saw him, and I was like, what? Hey, hey. Mr. Isbell. They don't call you Mr. Isbell. They hardly ever call me Mr. Isbell. They did call you Mr. Isbell. Did they? Hello, Mr. Isbell. Hello, Mr. Isbell. Hello, Mr. Isbell. So funny. M1 Josh from Spring Valley.
M1, Mr. Joshua. What up? Not much. How are you guys? Good. Good. So, I feel Lauren's pain. Lauren's just a year younger than me. But when I turned 21, I went to get my first six-pack of Bud. Delicious. And did not get carded. Oh, I hate that. Oh, that's ridiculous. Oh, the not getting carded thing? The day he turned 21, he said, I'm going to get a fresh six-pack of Budweiser. Yeah, and I can't wait until he asked me for my ID so I could be like, really? Yeah, I got it. Based on that, pal. Yeah, once you... Based on that. Meanwhile, they're like, sir, you've been doing this for years, haven't you? Yeah. You're like, hey, you can look over it if you want. I didn't even see my license. Where are all the ladies with the phone calls? There's a... Here's... No, we do not. No, it's a dude. M1 Steve from La Mesa, you there? Yeah. How old are you? I'm 36. How old's your wife? She's 33. How does she do with the carding thing? She still gets carded. We're working on our third kid, and the nurse at the OB didn't believe that we had three kids. She's like, no, you guys are still in your 20s, right?
Genetics. My wife gets really excited when that happens. That's awesome. What? Todd and I went to dinner with Jenna. It was on Jenna's birthday in April. And the waitress said, are you guys babysitting? And Todd's 38. He's like. No, that's my daughter. Babysitting who? Jenna. Oh, oh, oh. Because I, I mean, Jenna's nine. I look a little young, I guess. But normally I don't get questioned as to being her mom. But Todd, like for them to question him, I was like, dang, babe, you must feel good right now. He's looking good. Right? Saw him the other night. He's looking great. That's right. Crazy curly hair. Facebook fan page now. Oh, let's not talk about it. Yeah, he's got his own Facebook now, right? Yeah, check it out. Todd the God. Danny made it for him. It's so brilliant. Hysterical. Hysterical. He checks it, too. Oh, of course he does. Because he's dying for Facebook. I'm up to 58 fans now. Isn't that great? Give him some more fans. Todd the God. Todd the God. He's a good guy. So be a detective and try to tell me how old this woman is by the sound of her voice. Here at Mills, and I've had wonderful attention from all of the faculty, everyone here, I'm getting a degree in art history. We'll tell you.
When we come back, we're also going to do some Tuesday tutors with you. I love that. Your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Wells Fargo has been in California since 1852. In that time, a lot has happened, like the invention of the horseless carriage. the discovery of radio waves, and the prevalence of sunglasses. Through it all, the people of California have been able to count on the strength and stability of Wells Fargo. That's why we're excited to share the news that Wachovia is now Wells Fargo. Together, we're one team stronger than ever working with you. This means more bank locations, more ATMs, more online capabilities, and the same great customer service you've come to expect.
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22nd, AP Quintanilla y Cumbia All-Stars. And on May 23rd, Elvis Crespo. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego, Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. All right, so before we went to break, I played you this audio and I said, tell me how old this person is. Let's try it again. Here at Mills, and I've had wonderful attention from all of the... faculty, everyone here. I'm getting a degree in art history. It's taken me quite a long time because I have had a busy life raising several children and an invalid husband. So I'm finally achieving this and it makes me feel really good about it. I love her. Anybody want to take a guess? 13. 87. She's older than... I know the news story. Older than 13. One dollar.
Anybody else? 91. Close. I said 87. She is 94 years of age. Hard to believe she doesn't sound 94. She sounds like a young, kind of young woman. Young-ish. Do you know why she was speaking? She's graduated from college. For her. At 94. She's got her degree. For her. 94 years old. It's amazing. I was reading this yesterday, and she says that... She doesn't even want to stop. She's like, now that I have my degree, I want to start working. You know, I want to, you know, keep going. Yeah. So cool. Wow. I think it's pretty cool. Kind of makes me feel like a fat turd. I know, me too. M1 Gurr from North County? Yes. What up? What's going on? What's going on? Just driving to work right now. We're laughing at Woodsy because he was just calling himself a fat dude. Yeah, turd.
He speaks. He sometimes can get a little down on himself is what we're saying. No worries. I'm a little chunky, too. We all are. What's going on, girl? I was just calling in about the ID card thing. I just turned 21 not too long ago. My wife's 22. I turned 21 as I was flying out of Afghanistan to Kyrgyzstan, and I was really excited. They let everybody in the military at 21 drink, and I was excited to get it. carded for the first time, you know, that's everybody's big thing. Nobody ever carded me. You're not going to. You're not going to tell you get to be old like us. Yeah, it's weird. Doesn't happen, bro. You gotta wait. I don't get it. You walk in a bar and a guy will look at you and be like, yeah, go ahead, pal. You're like, where was this six weeks ago when I wanted to go out with my boys? Yeah. The night I went back, the night I came back, I actually went out to dinner with my wife and my daughter and still went out. Nobody even carded me or my wife. Savor it. Savor it, my friend. Savor it. Taste on it. Enjoy every moment of it. Drink it in. Pretty soon, you're going to have scraggly-ass little hairs sticking out of your eyebrows. Yep, and out of your ear lobes, which is fabulous. Like an old... You turn into Yoda. You know what happens when you get older? That's what happens. You want to know what embarrassing is? Going to get my hair cut and going, can you go ahead and get the hair out of my ears? It happens to everybody.
No words. Is that something that most guys ask to get done? I thought you'd just do that at home. I do it. I got a mirror that has eight times reflective on one side. Oh, boy. And it's got a light on it, so you flip the switch. It's got one side's normal, the other side's eight times magnified. And I use it to take hairs out of my ears because I'm... Hairs I will get. Hairs out of my ears I will get. Get that little guy that goes. Got it. I have the little nose drill. They get burnt out. I burn them out. I've killed two already. I got a nose drill. Put a double A battery in it. Put battery in you, Will. You just get the wife and have her tweeze them out. Oh, it hurts. Out of the ears hurts. I wish my wife would give me that attention. I'm okay with that. When I was a teenager, I used to be able to punish my zits. What? Did you build a house of cards with him or what? Really? You're going to drop that at 7.05? You've got to explain, Woodsy. I'll explain. I'd be happy to explain. Go right ahead. I sat in bed thinking about it all night. Jamie and I talked about it in bed last night. It's brutal. She goes, I didn't get it. I go, yeah, exactly. Nobody did. Didn't you get it? No, she didn't understand why somebody would do that. Oh, yeah, because they're pathetic. Mikey had a girl that he really liked named Dana. Dana. Dana. And Dana, he...
was able to manipulate her to come over to the house and hang out. And instead of throwing in a video or, you know, making a sandwich and hanging out and visiting in the backyard, Mikey decides, come to my room. Let's build a house of cards. He let that piece of gold slip at the end of the show yesterday. I'm waiting. I'm, I'm, I picture, I laid him and I was picturing her going. Really? Oh, okay. Let's put the chimney over here. Why would we build a house of cards? Because it's cool. Yeah, because I'm a dork. He liked to do it. How did you punish your zits? I'm sorry. Oh, yeah. I would, when I, yeah, my brother, my brother hated to get rid of zits. He loved to keep them? It wasn't that he, it wasn't that he didn't care. He didn't have the wherewithal. The cojones? He didn't have the cojones to endure the pain. I would punish my face. There's nothing more satisfying. It hurt like crazy, but I don't care. I would go for it to get rid of it. And I also developed a deal where when I would go to bed at night, I'd take Oxy10, and I would press the Oxy10 into the zit, and then I would cover the zit with Oxy10, and I would go to bed at night.
with little white dots all over my face of Oxy10. It worked like a charm. You can do that with toothpaste as well. Yeah, that's what I was just going to say. I've done that with toothpaste. It dries them up. I don't think that works. Does that work better than Oxy10? Just as well. It works just as well? That never worked for me. My dermatologist said, keep the fluoride away from your face. Yeah. That team took me off fluoride completely. It worked for me. It worked for me. I mean, look at this face. Are you kidding? Hey, I want to give dudes a really great tip that I found at Nordstrom this weekend. Oh, boy. I found the most comfortable socks in the world at Nordstrom. They're Nike socks and they are left and right socks. No way. And I was like, really? Really? Left and right socks. They point in. They point in on each side. It's the most comfortable thing. And it makes sense. Are they high socks, short socks, big socks? Both. Are you wearing them? Yeah, I'm wearing them right now. Can I see them? Yeah. Take the shoe off. Have you had a time experiencing particularly uncomfortable socks? Oh. See the little L? Yeah, they look comfortable. See the L? Yeah. Hey, Lauren, I've got some socks that are super uncomfortable. Those are nice. What's uncomfortable about them? They're too short. Do they slip into your shoe? They sag. They slip. They sag like my breasts. Write that down. And they just suck, man. They're flimsy. Those look money. Dude, they are. And when you think about it, when you think about it,
The ones that are not left and right and meant for either foot, they're just a little tube. Dude, you know how much I spend on my baseball socks? Like $30. I know. Your wife was talking about it. She was talking about it. Hey, you know what, though? Great pair of socks, a great pair of socks. I put them on, and I'm like, you remember a little kid and you get new tennis shoes? And you're like, yeah, Lee! And you're running in the parking lot. That's me when I put these socks on. I'm like, boing, boing, boing, boing, jumping around the house. L.O.B., why have you had it with that? What's that? You gave me the... Left and right socks. Really? Yeah, I knit my own socks. I just... Out of carrot greens. It's a little excessive. It does? I have a three-pack that they are nice. You have left and rights, too? Yeah, one of the times when I went to the gym, I didn't have socks, and so I bought some there, and they were Nike, too. They were nice. It don't pollute the planet. What happened? No, I'm just... To me, it's a little excessive. No, not wasteful. Excessive. Just a marketing scheme. No, they really do shape. They're shaped. Turn, turn. If they're shaped like your foot, it's like a shoe. There's no extra sock by your baby toe. Oh, I love that. Isn't that great? It hugs it. It hugs your foot. I'm going to get her some. But I have to say what I like. Oh, I bet you'll never go back, L.O.B. I bet if you try right and left socks, you'll never go back. No, because my dryer or something in my house eats my socks. So if I end up with two lefts, what am I going to do? Probably you.
For breakfast? No. Probably. You're saying, you're like, where are my socks? I always lose socks. I have a bag of orphan socks. Do you have community washer and dryer? No. How does that happen? I don't know. You don't have the graveyard of socks? Sometimes they get lost in your sheets or in a sweatshirt. Check your pockets of your sweatshirts and stuff. One time, I was at the other radio station. and a pair of dirty underwear fell out of my... Check this out. I'm so grossed out. A pair of dirty underwear fell out of my pant leg. Oh, my gosh. Why were they dirty? I just told that story on the radio. Why were they dirty? It worked? Hi, Mike. What is wrong with you? So I put it in my pocket. What do you mean, dirty underwear? And I didn't tell anybody until this moment. People are like, you're a dirty underwear, right? What's that smell? Women's? Well, just all I mean is. Briefs? Maroon briefs? Banana hammock? I love it. Banana hammock. Leave me alone. Were they maroon briefs?
No, they weren't maroon briefs. They were probably bright blue. Can I tell you? Yeah. Shut up! Boxer briefs. I wear boxer briefs. They were yours? Yeah, yeah. Here's what happened. Oh, no. I'm powering down. It's been the best time I've heard in a while. My day just left my body. Were you on the air? Please be nice to me. Were you on the air when it happened? You were walking into work? Where were you? Sitting down in his chair, probably. Here's what happened. You were in your throne. I need to hear every detail. Okay. Be nice to me. Right. I'm going to check your pockets every day from then on. I'm going to work. And I need a pair of jeans. And so I look in my jean drawer and there's nothing good that I can see. And so I see a pair of jeans hanging over the...
chair in my room. And I'm like, I'll wear these. They're dirty, but I don't care. They were in the hamper. They were in the hamper, weren't they, Mike? Well, yeah, you don't wash your jeans every day. Tell the truth. They were in the hamper. He pulled them out of the hamper. We've all done it. It's okay. I pulled them out of the hamper. Leave me alone. Because I'm thinking. I'm like, okay, there wouldn't be underwear if your jeans were hanging over the chair. Why did I? See, you guys just gave me the need to lie, and I said it was over the chair. I got it. Sienna's right. It was in the hamper. I got it. You know how I know? What? Picture this. Cubby gets home from work and is so excited. To get nude, he takes the whole thing off in one and just throws it in the hammer. That's exactly what happened. Wait, so did it fall out of a pocket or did it fall out of the bottom of your pant leg? Let me explain. That was the bit. Maroon underwear. So I put my socks on. Okay. All right. I put my socks on. A little tiny sock. Tiny. Just so tiny. Just shut your mouth. And then I put on my jeans. Okay. And.
I went to work. You sprayed him with cologne, probably, too. And I was standing at the urinal. Oh, my God. It's getting better. Standing at the urinal. And as I finished, you know, you button your pants and you shake your pants as you're buttoning your pants. And it went boop. Fell out the bottom of your pant leg. Fell out the bottom of my pant leg. And I went like this. Oh, my God. Oh, no. You're lucky you didn't go in the urinal. Oh, no. And I thought to myself, thank you. There was no one standing next to me. Can you imagine? Like, dude, dude. Yeah, like, imagine if it was, like, Chainsaw, you know? Oh, he would have killed you. He would have been like, oh, my gosh, Barzy, your panties just fell out of your head. He would have exactly said that. He would have. You know, when I first started? Oh, this just reminded me of something. When I first started as an intern at the last radio station, there was another intern who I worked with, and he had a thing where he would roll the bottom of his jeans, and that was like his look. Yeah. And he was also a bartender at night, so he had some late nights, and he'd roll in real early in the morning. And it was one day just like, dude, just unroll your pant leg. Let me see what it looks like normal. Every day they're rolled up. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. He was like.
I think he was hungover. So he's like, okay, Sienna. And he unrolled his pant leg. And Doritos? Oh, my God. No way. That was Doritos. You filthy pig. Did you point and laugh and go, you filthy pig? You filthy pig. I was like, what? You're a filter. I went on the air and it was like. Dude, I need to tell you the story. I got one. I got one. Gosh. You're filthy. That's disgusting. Yeah, Willie Nelson fell out of there. He ran out of the room. His little crumbled Doritos. One of them was a whole one. How did they get in there? Because he was probably hammered and got home and eating Doritos. Bad Blake's urine mug fell out. Wow. Yeah, I was born bad and I slept in this guy's rolled up jeans. Oh, my God. I had nowhere else to stay. Where was I going to stay on Bad Blake? I got $10 in my pocket. Oh, my gosh. Holy cow. Yeah, I've had socks fall out, too. That's ridiculous. That's not as bad as dirty underwear. Wow. That's hysterical. Hey, your little man panties fell out on the floor. Little maroon man panties. They're not maroon. Do I have a pair of maroons? Okay, they were fuchsia. Yeah, fuchsia. He's looking at his underwear.
Are they maroon? These are my most embarrassing boxer briefs. I grabbed them today and I go... We've all got them. What's wrong with them? We've got that pair that we keep in our repertoire. You were wearing shamrocks the other day. Shamrocks are cool. Who do I think I am? Who do I think I am? Isaac Mizrahi. Who do you think you are? Dolce & Gabbana? Red. You're a girl. We're all compared to our underwear. My underwear is red. Woods is plaid. Lauren's are pink. What do you got, Mr. Cool Guy? He's commando. He's got underoos on. He's commando. He's a little superman. You know that. Is he commando? He doesn't wear underwear. I'll show you. You want to see? I'm coming in right now. Hold on, guys. Don't need you. Don't need you.
That's freaking Doritos. That could be a bit. What fell out of your pants? Yeah, what fell out of your pants? Wow. I can't believe your little panties fell out on the ground. I've had socks. I've had socks. Oh, you know what else has fell out of my pants? The dryer cloth. Oh, yeah. I've had that. The dryer napper. I was out at a party one time and my cell phone fell out of my dress because I store it in the boob area, you know? Weird. No one can find it. And someone's like, where did that just fall from? You can put a Scud missile in that area. You know where it fell from, yeah. I spent $10 in my pocket this morning. That's pretty solid. That was awesome. That's the best. That's great. It's like a paycheck. I found some shrapnel in my pants this morning. Weird. But is that the stuff you chew on? Yeah, like the plastic. The plastic? 5701949. There were tears coming from my face. Yeah, what's falling out of your pants? Yeah, call us up and tell us embarrassing things that have come flying out of your pants. Wow. Socks, underwear, and the dryer cloth. Dirty underwear was phenomenal. Now, I take my little pants, my four-inch pants, and I shake them to make sure there's nothing in there. I bet you do. I don't want any underwear. Imagine if a human woman saw that. A human being that's a woman saw. Oh, my gosh. I need to go back to that for a minute. Now, when the underwear fell, there's no way you stuffed it in your pocket. I did. What am I?
Really? Throw it in the trash. I'm going to walk out of it. Throw it in the trash. Yeah, I'd probably have trashed it. You would have? That's bulky in your pocket. Dude, so that somebody could be like, oh my gosh, some creep just threw their underwear away in the bathroom and it's me. It's me. People do it. Creeps. Creeps do it. No. Sometimes you just got to toss it. George Michael at rest stops. That's who does it. Not me. I have a feeling it's pretty common in the men's bathroom to have an accidental situation. You know who does it? Tobias from Arrested Development. He does it. I don't do it. What's wrong with us? 570-1949. Doritos. Brett Michaels did his first interview since getting out of the hospital. We got audio for you. He describes what happened to his head that day. He had that brain hemorrhage. He describes it. We got it. I just pictured you to this song in your little man panties dancing. Oh, shut it. A little bit creepy. For a few minutes while I educate your butt. Let your voice be heard on the Mikey show now. How are these levels, friends? Call 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. A message from the Mazda 6 sports sedan to its competitors. Bring it on.
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San Diego 6 is your station for balanced news, bringing you all sides of the story. I'm Jim Patton. We make it easy to find the information you need. I'm Heather Myers with the only 30-minute newscast at 10 p.m. and 11 at 11. Tonight at 10, afraid of the bark and the bite. She'll get herself into these panic attacks. How a San Diego program cures the fear of dogs. I can't believe the turnaround that she's done. San Diego 6 News, tonight at 10 and on the web at sandiego6.com. Thousands of customers all over the world are sharing their stories of how Ovation Cell Therapy has helped grow their hair thicker. stronger, longer, and faster. Many of these wonderful stories are from cancer survivors who are excited to tell how Ovation Cell Therapy helped to reduce hair loss due to radiation and chemotherapy treatments. Ovation is proud to be a San Diego partner with City of Hope's Walk for Hope.
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Do you remember when you used Dial-Up to access the Internet? Remember how slow that was? Thankfully, things have changed, and now you're doing more and more on the Internet. Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Deuce, the Huffington Post. You just couldn't do all of this with Dial-Up. And you know how some levels of DSL from the phone company aren't that much faster than Dial-Up? Here's the deal. If you want super fast Internet without all the lag you get with DSL, switch to Earthlink from Time Warner Cable. See, Time Warner Cable has this advanced fiber network. So with it, Earthlink is 13 times faster than DSL. 13 times. That's huge. Seriously, getting Earthlink for your internet service is such a no-brainer. Pick up the phone and call them 1-800-CABLE-TV to get Earthlink from Time Warner Cable for only $36.95 a month. That's 1-800-CABLE-TV or go to timewarnercable.com anytime. Some restrictions apply. Make sure your low fares stay low to St. Louis with no bag fees from Southwest Airlines. Grab your bag. It's on nonstop from San Diego to St. Louis. Book your nonstop flights to St. Louis now at Southwest.com. Weight and size limits apply.
Our choice, this report, it is brought to you by CarMax. Take your car to CarMax for a free appraisal and a written offer to buy. It's good for seven days. The smart choice is CarMax, the way car buying should be. Looks like the five northbound via to San Ysidro, an accident there. It's an SUV and a motorcycle that collided, tying that whole area up. 15 southbound between Center City Parkway and 9th Avenue. Pretty much stop and go right now. And the Coronado Bridge in both directions between the 5 and the Toll Plaza. Again, stop and go traffic. In fact, they did issue a traffic advisory in both directions due to that heavy traffic. This report also brought to you by the Metropolitan Water District of Southern California. Southern California has a water shortage. Replace a portion of your lawn with low water use plants. And you could save 1,000 gallons a month. Go to BeWaterWise.com. You'll find out more. I'm Stacey. Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. What's happening? This is Bird from Dragon Eyewear with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Tuesday morning being brought to you by the good folks at Guayaquil Yerba Mate. And they are teaming up with your local Jimbo's Naturally Markets to give you a chance to win one of two custom-built rusty surfboards. And those boards will be built to your spec. So enter those Jimbo's locations to fill out the forms necessary.
While you're there, take advantage of the fine product lines that they carry, including Guayaquil, Yerba Mate. Surf-wise today, looking pretty weak and definitely bleak as we've got that continued low tide sucking out negative low until about 730 or 8. And besides that, we've got a drop in the southwest swell, overcast skies, southwest winds. So it's weak, funky, and junky. Could get a little bit better later in the day as the tide fills in, but you're going to still have to deal with that wind in small size. So don't expect a whole lot out there. For up-to-the-minute surf reports, forecasts, go to surfline.com. And for everything you need in order to go surf, check out one of South Coast surf shops, five locations. And this surf report can be brought to you three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Back to the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Do you think Boss Skaggs and Ansel Fonga? Hello. Hello. This is Boss. Boz Skaggs. You mean Boz was short for Bosley? Bosworth. I think I'd change my name if my last name was Skaggs. Why? I have a friend with the last name Skaggs. Ricky Skaggs, Boz Skaggs. Skaggs. Ain't as good as bad Blake. That's true. Nothing is. It's funny how fallen feels like flying. I'd play drunk, divorced, on the run. That got me playing with you hippies. Let's see. That's from the movie Crazy Heart.
Available now on DVD and Blu-ray. Yeah. And DirecTV. Great movie. You guys like referencing that, huh? We do. Lauren? Like 40 times a day. Yep. About. Really? Question mark? Can everybody tell in the audience that we just got done eating breakfast really fast? Because we're all like... Ew, I know. Sorry about that. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No, me. I was like... We have like three and a half minutes to just eat. And then the next time is half an hour later. Then we all go. Shove it in. So here is Bret Michaels. Bret Michaels, as you know, had a brain aneurysm and almost died. Here he is talking about the ordeal. All of a sudden, I just started moving around and boom, there was this explosion. This is about 11, maybe 11 o'clock at night. You could actually hear it, Bret. You could actually hear it. It felt like a pop. It just felt like it went.
pop and it went, it was like a thunder, they call it a thunderclap. And I've never instantaneously had a headache like that in my entire life. I mean, it, I wish the word's not even a headache. It's like a migraine times 10. It just exploded instantly, ran from my temple down to the back of my skull. And that's, at that point I went into, I knew something was severely wrong. Oh, that's terrifying. So scary. Oh, it freaked me out. So here he is. talking about being in the hospital. Now, we noticed when we saw you lying in the hospital bed with all the wires and tubes and things, you still had your bandana on. It is like Superman without the cape. I said, if I'm going out, I want to go out rocking. If I got to go, I said, leave the boots on, some form of the bandana and a cape. If I can go out right, not in that hospital gown. That's what happens. That's his thing, the bandana. No, are you guys joking when you say that he's got hair hanging out of his...
Like fake hair. And you add his hat and his bandana. That's what they think. There has to be some balding going on and that's why he always wears it. Yes, they're joking. I don't know. I know. I mean, it wouldn't be the craziest thing. Who would wear that? A bandana with hair attached? Wouldn't it though? But why would Oprah ask him? I know, but Lauren. Wouldn't it be kind of weird that a guy went and bought a cowboy hat with hair hanging off of it? Well, if you're trying to uphold a certain persona, and Oprah asked him, I think maybe she has a little inkling. Babe, I got my three cowboy hats with hair on them, but I can't find the brunette one. Where is it? I don't know, babe. Where did you leave it? I don't know. I think I left it in life. I am mad. That was a legitimate question. Babe, where's my cowboy hat? with the unwashed straight hair. I want dirty hair today. This is the washed straight hair. Don't you check out on me, lady. Don't you check out on me, lady. She's dancing her way out of trouble. Oh, is she? What about me? Can I? Since I got you mad, can I dance my way out? I did. That was a legitimate question. You guys always joke about that, but I'm not... I bet that's what it is. It's a joke. I don't have TV. I don't know what Bret Michaels looks like now.
It's the same deal with like Hulk Hogan. They're both balding, but they want their long hair coming out. So they put the bandana on. So that's their look, but also to hide the balding. She gets so mad at me. It just made my day. Oh, I'm glad. She gets roasted for 30 seconds. It gets mad. Pepper. I get roasted for five days straight. Pepper. Do I? Pepper. Pepper? Irish Cyclone. She's a little peppery today. She's best. M1 Marsha in Oceanside. That's my mom's name. Hello. Hi. Marsha, Marsha, Marsha. Yeah. Marsha, how are you? I'm great, thank you. You have something weird fall out of your pants? Oh, Mikey, I have to tell you, when I was driving the car and I heard you tell that story, I thought, how embarrassing. And I immediately looked over and told my son I had something very similar happen. And it was the most embarrassing thing, I think, in my life. What happened? Well.
I was in my 20s, and I was at a singles group in a church basement. And I went over. First of all, I had this bad habit of when I would wear nicer pants, I would take them off with my pantyhose in them and hang them up. You know, when you wear pants, you know, for a couple hours, they're not really dirty to wash the next day. Hang them up. Now, for guys, because I'm not 100% on pantyhose. Are pantyhose the things you get into, like pants, or are they one at a time? And they have the... They got the cotton crotch. Every woman has their own little dance that they put pantyhose on with. They're the ones that go all the way up. It's one foot at a time, one leg at a time. It's a little bit here at a time, a little bit there at a time. So you dance them all the way up. Right. Okay. So there was a food, like a little dessert buffet. And I walk over and I'm getting some dessert. And I look down and I see about 12 inches of a pantyhose coming out of the bottom. Holy cow. Oh, my God. Oh, my gosh. And I'm like, oh, my gosh. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. And so there's a little child close by. Oh. And so I thought, how do I get? I don't even know where the restroom is in here to shuffle my way over there. So there's a little child there. So I get down and start.
making nice and talking to this little child and stuffing the pantyhose back up the leg, hoping that it will stay there. Oh, wow. And I start walking again, and it starts wiggling out again. I said, I've got to get out of here. I don't know where the restroom is. I thought, I see the stairs. I'm going to go up the stairs. So I start walking across the room, and the pantyhose comes out not only 12 inches, but more and more. And just then, a guy that's been kind of hot on me for a while that I have no interest in, He's hard to shake. Oh, don't worry. Follows me. You found a way to shake him. Yeah, you found a way. Oh, he starts walking and wanting to talk. And it's really obvious. There's about 24 inches of pantyhose hanging out of my pants. Oh, wow. That is embarrassing. Yeah, the more I walk up the stairs, the more the pantyhose start coming out. And he's following me. So what happened? I think I just said, I got to go. And I kept going up the stairs. And oh, my gosh.
That's it? That's pretty brutal. That's amazing. That's pretty brutal. Thank you for the call, Marsha. I appreciate it. Emma and Vanessa from Oceanside. Hi, guys. Hi. Good morning. Good morning. I have a pretty good, pretty embarrassing story, actually. It was 1994, and I'm an East Coaster, so I went to school on the East Coast in Virginia. Me too. Yeah, and my folks put me in military school. VMI? What's that? VMI? Randolph-Magan Academy. Oh, okay. Randolph-Magan. And so one of the requirements was our parents had to iron in our names in all of our clothes, all of our underwear, all of our bras, like everything. And so I was getting ready one morning for school. And I went down, and I had breakfast, and then I was walking to school, you know, in my first class. And later on, at my second class, a couple of kids come up to me. And they're like, oh, hey, Vanessa, did you drop something back there? I'm like, what? And I turn around, and they're holding my underwear, sitting in class. Oh, no. And they're giggling. They're like, you know, how do they name it? They knew they were mine.
Your panties fell out of your pants. And they had her name ironed in. That's brutal. I would be mortified. How do you do that? How do you do iron-on names and pants? You know, I don't know. I think that's why she said parents do it. Yeah, parents do it, but I wonder how they do it. She put them in every single pair of underwear, all my bras, all my clothes. Were they at least a good pair of underwear? Yeah. I don't remember because I wanted to die. Yeah. You blocked that out. Yeah. She probably hadn't thought about it since it happened until we brought it up. Until we brought it up. Thanks for the call, Vanessa. That's dynamite. They actually found her underwear. At least no one found yours, Mike. Yeah, I found them. Jamie texted me and said that dog food falls out of her jeans all the time because our babies will get a piece and they love to run with one little piece and burrow and hide it in her.
clothes. And dog food and pecans. Because we used to have a pecan tree in Texas. Pecans would fall out of our clothes. That's funny. Dogs can embarrass you because dogs will rummage around and find things. Yes, they will. You know what I mean? Went over to a girl's house when I was 14. Just leave it at that. What did they find? You can figure it out. Her stuff? Yep, her stuff. Yikes. Yeah, you do. No, I swear I don't. Nosing through the garbage? Yep. Yeah. Oh, my God. Every adult just got it. Every adult. I didn't have to say anything. Something used? Yes. Were you hanging out with her? And the dog brought it in the room? Yes. And do you want to know what everybody did? I vomited. No. Everybody, including me, her friend, Valerie, that was there. Even the dog. I was with a guy named Renee. He was the good looking one. I was like his.
Chubby friend that he would bring along to make him look better. Yeah, I know that. I have one of those. Yeah. His name's Mikey. I'm sitting right in front of you. Did the dog knock over your house of cards? Really? This is at her house. Hey, he took his cards over. We all pretended that it didn't happen. Yeah, we did too. None of us said a word. And she kind of got up and walked over and gathered it. And, you know, we all just talked like everything was normal. Was it just the three of you? No, it was the four of us. It was me, Renee, Valerie, and this girl. Okay. I was thinking like her parents were there or something. No, I'm sure they were. But I remember the room. I remember everything. Everything. Yeah, you don't forget that. The room was downstairs. The dog came from upstairs. Maybe you flush it. Yeah, maybe she did. I don't know. Yeah, maybe you flush it before. Yeah. Maybe we don't talk too much more about it so that we don't have to paint any more of a picture that's already been...
Maybe I throw up in my mouth. Maybe you do. Maybe I throw up that ham and Swiss bagel I just ate. Gross. Maybe we move on. Good morning. It's 745 San Diego. The sun's just starting to come up over the Rincon Mountains. No mountains here. Good morning. Maybe I should have not told that story. Maybe not. Thanks for ruining my day. What's up next? So, things that fell out of your pocket, huh? Let's see. Appetite. Didn't play this for you yesterday, so I want to play it for you now. This is... Is your computer not working? No, I found it. It's a weird break. No, I wanted to play this for you yesterday. This is Miss Colorado. Actually, sorry, Miss Michigan, the winner of Miss USA, talking about...
The birth control pill when she was asked at the contest. Tara Connor, your question, please. So this month, the oral birth control pill marked its 50th anniversary. Whoa. Do you guys know that? I had no idea that that's how old the birth control was. I thought it was older or younger. Way younger. I thought it came out in the 70s. Naive. I thought it did. That's when I started taking it. Do you believe health insurance should cover birth control pills like every other drug? Absolutely. I believe that. Thank you. Hi, Mom. I believe that. That is so weird. Yes, I believe insurance should cover it. Hi, Mom. I used the pill, Mom, with Brad. Anyway. That's weird. Yeah. That's a strange. That's very odd. That's a strange hi, Mom. Maybe her mom stood up in the audience with a sign or something. With a picture of Brad. Picture of Steve. Not me. Not that Steve. Just Steve. Birth control is just like every other medication, even though it's a controlled substance. And it's provided for free by your OB-GYN or any close-by family clinic. OB-GYN. It should be something that women should be allowed to get through their insurance because it is costly. Thank you. Thank you, Mitch. Thank you. I've never heard that before. OB-GYN. OB-GYN. Probably hard to answer those questions with the...
On the spot like that? Like putting you on the spot and giving you, I would be terrible. I'm a choke artist. Miss Colorado on social networking. Judge number four, Johnny Weir. By the way, nice outfit change, Johnny. Your question. Hi, Miss Colorado. Hello. Okay, so the question. A new social networking site has become a place for young people to anonymously post gossip, nasty, and sometimes sexual comments about their peers. Should such sites be regulated by the government? I feel that it's hard to regulate these sites, regulate any website, but I feel that we should take it into our own hands to be above the status and to show people that we should be kind and caring to everyone, no matter who they are, what they look like, or what they believe in. All right, thank you. That was a great answer. I feel like she didn't really answer anything. Those kill me.
You probably don't even remember what you say. Like, you probably get off the stage and you're like, what did I just say? It's called The Art of Talking and Saying Nothing. Yeah, I just blacked out. Mark Maumann is the master at it. Talking and saying nothing? Talking and saying nothing. It reminds me of the Billy Madison part where he talks about the puppy and the Industrial Revolution. You've never seen it, have you, Mike? No, you know that. Oh, okay. Never mind. You know that. It's not a documentary. If it's a documentary, I saw it. Or a Scorsese film. Well, he says, we are all now dumber, having heard that. Heard that, yeah. Hey, Mikey, an M1 just texted in saying that you guys should have to answer pageant questions. Oh, yeah. I'm totally in on that. Are you? No way. Absolutely. I'll try, but I'm going to be terrible. I'll look some up, and maybe we can do it tomorrow. How about we don't? Maybe we don't. Maybe we do. Like what? You ask them to us then, Jay, so I can participate. Oh, absolutely. You've got to be on the hot seat as well. Is there going to be a judge? I think the audience. M1s. Do we get to ask Jay questions too? Nope. I'm the... He's the asker. Yeah, I'm the asker. I'm the host. I'm the emcee. Yeah, he'll be the emcee. Do you guys think he'll do good? No. Why? I'll do terrible. I'm a choke artist. Are you? You're a stand-up comedian. You're not a choke artist. Yeah, but that's all pretty much planned. Is it? When I have to say smart things on the spot, I'm like... Write that down. Write that down. Write that down. That's great. That's going to make a great clip of all of you. Oh, that was phenomenal. It was so clean, too. Lauren O'Brien.
I'm going to have to say smart things on the air. I'm like. Oh, geez. I can't wait. I'll do it. So, Jay, that means you'll ask us questions like that. Like, you'll be like. Yeah, I'm trying to find some and I'll just go and find some ridiculous questions to ask you guys. It's like these crazy open end answers. It needs to be. It needs to be relevant culture, you know, pop cultural cop, pop culturally relevant stuff. Yeah. Topical. Topically relevant things. Do we have to talk in our pageant voice? Yes. Okay. Yes. I think that, let's see, like a question. If we get to do that, then that's really fun. Give me a question, Sienna. What if I have to do it? I'll do it. Mike, there is a lot of controversy going on about seven-year-olds dancing to Beyonce's song, All My Single Ladies. How would you? It's great. I'm not sure where I'm going with it. As a parent. As a parent. How would you, if your child came home to you and wanted to partake in this, what would you tell them? How would you handle it? I would tell my child that they are a child and I am a grown up and they need to do what I say. And then if they didn't listen, I would be like, what's your problem? And if they were like, what's your problem? I'd be like, huh? You. That's a great answer.
All right. Thank you, Miss Colorado. We'll see you next year. Thank you, Miss Gilroy. Thank you, Miss Mexico. Miss Mexico. Thank you, Miss Mexico. We do that tomorrow. I love it. Done. We have to, on the spot, come up with a real snazzy answer. You can't hold it against us in ones. Can't they? It's going to be really hard. I really want to hear the clip of her saying that right now. Me too. Jay, get the clip. Jay, try to pull that. Yeah, can you do it? Is it possible? As fast as you can. Which one? Lauren's saying, I don't, what did you say? Doi. Whenever I have to say smart things on the spot, I'm like, doi. I love it. That's the greatest Lauren clip ever. Should be a drop. I'm going to make it as my ringtone. Have a good, have a good email for you guys. Oh, do we have, do we have time? Are we good? What? We have a few minutes. All right. Well, we'll start it and then people can call us and tell us what they think. 5701-949. Mikey, love the new show. Was hoping that you guys could help me out with a little situation that I'm in. First things first. I ask that you please, please is capitalized. Do not say my name on the air. Let's just say that a lot of people in my inner circle listen to your show every morning. I have been dating my boyfriend for three years.
And we've been living together for two. We have an awesome relationship. My family and friends love him. But there's just one thing that I cannot get over. His job. I am 29 years old and have a very stable, well-paid, full-time job. He is 41 years old and drives valet. Don't get me wrong. He makes decent money doing valet. But it's not full-time. There are no benefits. And more than anything, I wish he was more ambitious. We've started talking about marriage a lot recently. And I would love, love is all capitalized. I would love to marry him. But before I can do that, I need him to get a real job. Real is in quotes. I hope I don't sound awful, exclamation point. It's just. If we're going to have kids, which will need to be soon, I want them to have two parents with secure jobs. What should I do, you guys? How do you recommend I bring this up to them? M1, don't valet. She makes a fine pole. Well, yeah. You know? Listen. Yeah, I have a few thoughts on this. Numero uno. It always shocks me that women or men get into relationships.
Expecting people to change. And by men, you mean women. By men, I mean women. Now, unless, of course, unless she started dating the guy when she was 14 and he was 26, in which case it would have made sense. It would have been statutory rape. That he's now 41 with the same job. Yeah. But listen, I don't know how long you've been dating a dude. Three years. Three years. Wait a minute. I just figured out how long you've been dating the dude. I'm just ascertaining through your email. So you've been dating for three years. My guess is he's been a valet for three years. He's a valet. And unless before you started getting serious with the guy, you were saying, you know, so what are your dreams in life? What are your ambitions? Aspirations. Aspirations. It's very important for, I believe, that it is very important for a man to be a nest maker. Women, I think, are very attracted to nest makers. I thought the women were the nest makers. They are the nest makers, but the men are the ones that supply all the little twigs. They need to provide the nest. They need to provide.
A nice nest. Yeah. Okay. That will put together a nice nest, and then they want to put together the nest. You don't like breadwinner? Sure. Sure. I was trying to paint a picture. And when you first start dating someone, and I guarantee if he was doing valet, he was probably like, yeah, you know, I'm searching for another job. You know, I really want to do this. And I guarantee he wasn't like, I'm valet for the rest of my life. I love it. There's no way he said that. Yeah. So she was probably thinking, oh, okay, well, maybe this is just in between jobs or something. Now, a woman maybe is the breadwinner. Let's say a woman's a breadwinner. A lot of women are now. Yeah, a lot of women are the breadwinner. So if she's the breadwinner and he's a valet, you don't have any problem. You're taking care of him. So you don't have a problem. You're taking care of the guy. What are you looking at, Woodsy? Woodsy's looking at O'Brien. The broad on my right and the broad on my left. Yeah, but she doesn't want to take care of him. I'm waiting for the explosion. I've got so much to say, but we've got a break. So I'm just keeping it. Cotton up.
When we come back, I want to hear what O'Brien and Sienna have to say. So do I. And I want to hear what you guys have to say. 570-1949 or text 949. Mikey at gmail.com. Mikey Show, FM 94.9. This is the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar. Okay, just imagine it. Tonight at Humphreys, under the stars, you, danger mouse. And James Mercer of the Shins, otherwise known as Broken Bells. That's right. Broken Bells are kicking off their U.S. tour in San Diego tonight at Humphreys. It's an all-ages show. Go there. Minus the bearer in town this Saturday night, they'll play Soma. The National will play Spreckles this Sunday night.
Not a Surf's doing a 21 and up show at the Belly Up this coming Monday night, the 24th. And next Friday night, the 28th, go see Transfer with Dirty Sweet, The Silent Comedy, and Apes of Wrath. It's going to be such a good show. That's at the Birch North Park Theater this Friday night. Just announced, Wolf Mother Playhouse of Blues August 21st. And Alice in Chains, Deftones, and Mastodon will hit Viejas Arena together October 15th. Tickets for that show go on sale Saturday. So there you have it. Get out there and see them. The FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar can be heard four times daily. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar at fm949sd.com. Nissan. We've made our vehicles dependable, safe, and award-winning. And right now, during the Nissan National Ted Event, we've made them easier to get. With great deals on a full line of cars, crossovers, trucks...
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The 8 eastbound ramp to the 805 northbound, an accident tying things up in this whole area. Looks like East Vista Way at the 76. We've got a car that's stuck on the right shoulder, partially blocking that slow lane. And as you head on the 15 northbound ramp to old 395 highway on the north end, an accident. It's a hit and run. A semi was hit, and he's waiting for the CHP. This report also brought to you by Cal Fire. Wildfire is coming. Is your home ready for California Fire? A simple three-step plan to protect your home and family from wildfire. Go to ready. for wildfire.org. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego. Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of the Mikey Show. FM 94.9. If you like that, it's because you have blood rushing through your veins. Garden State. What 80s group did he sing for, Mike? Let's see if you can pick it up. Big one. Blackest Eagles. Nope. Tears for fears. Spandau, but like... Who can it be now? Really? No way. Listen. That's... Listen. I don't want you thinking. How great is that? Are you kidding me? That's the lead singer? That's Colin Hay. I have no idea. Dude, what? I have no idea either. That's Colin Hay. What is closer? I know it's Colin Hay, but I didn't know he was... Whoa. Isn't that rad? That guy's talented. Wow, he's so good. That just was really fun. I know. It blew your mind. You did.
You blew my mind. That's what I'm here for. We just got an email from a girl who said that she's 29. She's dating a guy that's 41, 42? 41, I believe. 41. And he's a valet. And she's like, guess what? I want kids. Guess what? Dude doesn't have any insurance. Guess what? You're probably going to need to have kids pretty quick here if that's going to be your guy. Yeah. Well, I think that it's normal for a woman to want her fella to have ambitions and to have... and to have insurance and to have a pension. Maybe he wants to be, maybe he wants to run a valet empire. He's just learning the trade. Yeah, how long has he been, how long are you going to learn that trade, Peter? Well, they're in love. Can I chime in? Please. Okay. I've dated plenty of guys that, like, career doesn't come first. That's not part of my criteria in dating somebody. However. It's hot. Tall guys. Yeah. With ripped abs. That's the criteria. That definitely helps. But you want to know what their aspirations are. If he's just content on being a valet forever and working part time and just doing the thing.
It's not. Just being happy? Yeah, well, no. Don't you want to see that he's actually doing something about it? Something he's working? Well, you want to see that, okay, if he has a plan, kids cost money. You can't live in fantasy land. I want to be an astronaut. I'm here at the Cheesecake Factory right now, but I want to be an astronaut. Right, then that's fine. Really, are you going to school? Well, yeah. Taking any aeronautics classes? Exactly. You want to see that he's supplementing that somehow, you know? Sure. I was waiting tables. It's great. If you're at Cheesecake Factory, are you taking classes to get into the NASA department? Right, but if he's just doing valet because he sees absolutely nothing wrong with it, then that's fine. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. But if you want to have kids, they cost money. They need health insurance. They need all those things. So I think if they're going to seriously sit down and talk about kids and things, then she needs to make sure that he plays. It sounds like they have been. What's he? Question. A lot of people out there with degrees that are badasses. that have been badasses for 25 years that can't get jobs. So this valet, who's 41, needs to go find a job at a bank? Doing what? Doing refis? What? Yeah. What's he going to do? Perfect. Times are tough. Really? Times are tough, man. The guy's working, man. He's making money. It's never bothered her before. Yeah, and that's great.
If you're single. She makes enough money for the both of them. They're fine. Wait, wait, wait. She didn't say that she made enough money. She does. She's 29. She makes good money. They've lived together two years. They don't live in a tent. I'm 29 years old. I have a very stable, well-paid, full-time job. Well-paid, full-time job. They don't live in a tent. But that doesn't mean that she's... throwing down money for him, it means that she has money. They have enough for the two of them now, but kids are expensive. I'm saying they live together. Yeah, I'm sure he pays rent as well. I see where Woodsy's coming from, though. Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. If this was a... Wait, okay, Woodsy, you just got me on something, dude. Let's think about this for a second. I'm just going to change things up hypothetically here. A 29-year-old man has written us. OK, 29 year old man says, I have a very stable, well-paid, full-time job. My girlfriend is 41 years old. She's a waitress. Anybody got a problem?
Absolutely not. Of course not. And that's the difference. Well, no. Some guys, that would bother some guys, just like that bothers some girls. What's he's right? What's the evil here? Because there's still a societal norm among a lot of people that the woman should be at home and she doesn't even need to be working in the first place. Well, wait a minute. Okay. As long as we're willing to admit that we're saying that women stay at home and men... are the money-making earners. No, we're not willing to admit that. No, we're not willing to admit that. But Mike, even you said a few minutes ago that women are attracted to men that can provide a nest. They are. So what's wrong? She doesn't have one of those guys. She's attracted to this guy because she says she's in love with him and they've been together. They've had their... Think about it. They've lived together for two years. In that two years, she has had a well-paying job. He has been a valet. They are... They are getting by. They've lived together two years. No, but that doesn't equate to when kids come in the picture, they're a lot more money than just two people. I should see my baby registry. Well, I know. No kidding. So what's the bit with the kids? They think they want to have kids later? She says. Probably ASAP if he's 41. She has a high paying, well, she has a high.
He's 41. She doesn't have insurance where she works? I don't know. She's got a full-time job. She's got a full-time, high-paying job. That's well-paid. She's very stable. What's the bitch? What's the problem? They're in love. She loves him. She wants to be with him, but she's not satisfied with his job. It's not just his job. What if a guy said that? It's his lack of ambition. We'd be getting slayed right now. If it was a dude that wrote in and said, I got a great job, full-time, blah, blah, blah. A lot of girls lack ambition, and guys can... say that. What's going to happen when she goes on maternity leave? It's one thing if a guy's complaining. Not always. It's one thing if a guy's complaining that his girlfriend, who's a teacher, doesn't make any money, but that's what she's doing. She's a teacher. That is a pretty qualified job. That is a very qualified job. And they don't make nearly enough money. So if he was saying something like that, yeah, he would look like a jerk. But this guy has a part-time job. He's not trying to get a full-time job. All this girl's asking is, tell me what to do where I can kind of give him a push to get him to follow his dreams or find some ambition. And I guess Woodsy's point, and I kind of see it, is why is she making a fuss over him having to do anything more? Because if roles were reversed, nobody would be saying anything. Also, if you love somebody, you love them.
Period. If we reversed roles all the time, there would be so many situations that are completely different. You know me, though, Sienna. I'm down with the cultural pigeonholes. I'm down with it. I love a woman staying home and taking care of the kids. It's traditional. I love the traditional family value stuff. I love it. But a lot of times... That is not our culture today. And you'll hear women go, I can't believe you. I can't believe that you would say that that's a deal. I know. And this broad fell in love with this guy. And they live together, right? Yeah. They live together. And if you are going to take the next step, granted, he may need some more ambition, but we don't know the whole story. M1 John from Santee. Are you there, John? Nope. Your cell phone's cutting in and out, bro. Doing great. Yep. That's way better. Okay. There's a couple angles here, I think. First of all, the fact that he doesn't have any ambition is problematic. The fact that she's even faxing you guys something or emailing is problematic because she's got a concern about it. He's got to at least want to own a limo place. And besides, the other thing, too, is I think one of you was making the point that when they start having kids, it's $250,000 to raise a kid. So get real and get reasonable. That's my take.
Is that for real? I don't know the actual number. I wonder if it really is $250,000. But here's my question for you, John. If the roles were reversed, would you be saying the same thing? No, because I embrace your traditional view, Mike. Well, here's the deal, guys. Think about this. Let's think about it on a number standpoint. Let's say she makes $100,000 a year. Let's say he makes $50,000. Let's say the roles are reversed. He makes $100,000. She makes $50,000. She quits her job to raise a kid, right? It's still the total amount of dollars that they make adds up. Who cares who's making it? You're making up these numbers. No, I'm saying, Lauren, if she's well-paid. She's well-paid for a single woman right now. I'm well-paid. She's not a single woman. She has a roommate who's her boyfriend. They've been living this way for a while. She also clearly said something about how she wants her kids to have two working parents. She did? She said something towards the end. Yeah, she says. That I want, she says, I hope I don't sound awful. It's just that if we're going to have kids, which will need to be soon, I want them to have two parents with secure jobs. Yeah. Why?
Just in case. Because maybe that's her thing. Maybe she's not the traditionalist. My boys don't have two parents with secure jobs. They have one parent with a secure job, kind of. But she's a different person. She's not saying she wants him to get a job so she can stay home. She wants to keep working, and she thinks he should be doing the same. She doesn't want to be the breadwinner. She goes to work every day, all day. He goes to work, what, four days a week, different times every day? Call it what it is. She doesn't want to be the breadwinner. She doesn't like it. Call it what it is. No, maybe she wants the quality. Maybe she was saying, if I'm going to work this hard and I'm going to raise a kid and work my butt off to make sure the kid has everything that I believe the kid deserves, hey, maybe he should step up to the plate as well and also want these things for our kids. What if I said that? What if I said that? What? Oh, yeah. What if I said that? All the stuff that you just said right now, what if I said that about Rebecca? People would flip out. But you're not that kind of person. I would be a chauvinist. But you didn't write the email, Mike. This is someone else. It doesn't take two incomes to raise a child. It doesn't. But she's saying she wants them to have two incomes. Well, then she's out of her mind, I think. Because when Kim and I had kids, I ran a skateboard shop. That's how expensive kids are. I mean, we still managed to have a kid. We had a house.
I never knew that, by the way. Yeah, I ran at two skateboard shops, and I was not making a lot of money. But, yeah, we still had kids. I love the story. It's like, well, we're saving to have kids. Really? How much do you have to save to have kids? My sister's baby just cost like $10,000. Well, they should have had insurance. I had insurance. Man, Chad and I both have full-time jobs, and we're still like, oh, my gosh, I don't know how we're going to do this. There's so much stuff. Dude, the bottom line is this girl doesn't want to be the breadwinner anymore. And that's fine, but just say that. M1 Joe from Mission Beach. Don't put words in your mouth. Hi, guys. I'm here. I'm calling in to defend the valet attendant. Atta boy. What do you got? I don't know how much he makes, but I was a valet attendant for five years. And I was bringing home anywhere from $20 to $25 an hour. And I had full-time benefits. And, I mean, it just depends on where you work, what company you work for. And, I mean, I don't know the whole backstory or anything. Joe, is that the norm in the industry? Like I said, it depends on where you work. If you work in Vegas, that's the norm, if not more. Yeah, because I'm going to take a guess here. I'm going to take a guess here, Joe. I'm going to guess that that's not the norm, that you can find exceptions to the rule. And it sounds like you were an exception to the rule. But I would say that probably the norm in the valet industry is not that it's a...
Job with benefits and a 401k and great health and dental. She said he does not have benefits. Yeah, he doesn't have them. She said it. Yeah, she said it. So, listen, it sounds like, and by the way, if you're one of the lucky valet dudes that has a job that's got benefits, great. Good for you. Lucky. Maybe he land one of those jobs. Yeah. You know what he should do? He should go be a CEO. That's what he should do. That's not what she's saying. Maybe he should hit the bell button. Everything is so, like. One end of the spectrum. Go be a CE. You're 41. Go be a CEU. That's not what she's saying. Come on. Be successful. Do it. Hey, listen to this. My dad has graduated with honors from the University of Notre Dame. Got his master's from University of Dallas in business. Can't find a job. Couldn't find a job in a year and a half. Where is Johnny Valet going to go get a job? But he's not trying. Sacking groceries? This guy is not even trying. How do we know? How do we know? Because she said he lacks ambition. He's just content with being a valet guy. He's content with being a valet because he's happy in himself. That doesn't mean he's lazy because he's happy. It doesn't mean he's lazy. It doesn't mean he's lazy, but it's being unrealistic. It's being unrealistic to expect a person in this economy to go get a quote-unquote real job. Okay, but he wants to marry her and have kids with her, and he expects her to be the one to pony up all the bills, and he not contribute? He's contributing. He's contributed for two years. Like a quarter of the salary. M1 Page. Because that's what's important in a marriage. M1 Page from Carmel Valley. Hi. Hi. I'm listening to you.
Very interesting. I had an original comment before, but I kind of have one question. Is she more upset about the fact that he doesn't have what she considers to be a respectable job? See, I think that's the question. She's going to want to marry Valet. But she got in a relationship with him in the first place. She wouldn't have been with him if she didn't think he was okay. Oh, wait a second, though, Sienna. Guy slays real good. What if it was a situation, and I know barely any women ever do this, but what if it was a situation where she went, Well, I'll change him. No. He'll start dating me, and he'll get so ambitious. He'll be motivated. He'll be motivated. He'll change. I'm sure he won't stay this way. I guarantee he was saying all along, like, I'm in between jobs or something like that, and he's like, you know, I have a degree, or maybe he doesn't, but he really wants to do this. I'm sorry, being a valet is great. Maybe you do make a lot of money in some different circumstances, but I guarantee he wasn't a little kid like... I want to be a valet. Yeah, but a lot of times people don't wake up in the morning and go, gee, I think I'm going to have a dead-end job. Sometimes it's just kind of what you're stuck with, and thank God you got a job. Yeah, no, I agree. I was in a marriage where he made a lot of money and he lost his job, and the guy didn't want to look for a job after that. He was really ticked off and depressed. I don't care if you work at McDonald's. As long as you're helping me rake in the bills, if I'm the breadwinner for a little while, if I make a little more money than you, he cares.
For a little while. Okay, fine. That was the magic word. The guy's not sitting home playing Xbox all day. How do you know? Because he's working. He works part-time. But he's working. He works part-time. For three years, they've been in a relationship, and he lacks ambition. It doesn't apply for anything. Hey, guys. Hey, men listening, better make some coin. No, it's not about that. No, BS, it's not. You better make some coin, guys. Look, I gave the example of a woman being a teacher. A guy can be a teacher and make $20,000 a year as long as he has a job. Yeah, because they're hiring teachers in droves. They're not cutting teachers by 50%. I'm giving an example. Think practical. And Woods, let me ask you, because I want to know if you really believe that or if you believe that what women want is they want the guy to be contributing. Or if you believe that they want the guy to be making bank. I think a little bit of both, dude. I don't think any woman's going to be upset with a guy that's making a ton of dough. I don't either. But I think what they want is they want a stable job. You want someone to think that.
You know, it is a bad economy. What if she lose her job? They have kids, then they're screwed. This guy has a part-time job. He can't afford for both of them. Sure he can, man. I'm sure she would like a safety net. If she makes, let's say she makes $80,000 a year, okay? Her boyfriend, let's say that he's got a great job at Costco with benefits, the whole bit, $45,000 a year. Okay, that's $125,000. Okay, now do you believe that she's like, I want out of this relationship because dude's not making a ton of money? Probably. Really? No. That's interesting to me. That's interesting. Personally, I think that what, and I may be wrong and naive, I'll say it, but I think that what all the women care about is that the guy's got a solid job with good benefits, but I might be naive. It's true. In Fantasyland, that is true. No, you're not naive. We want to feel like we're being taken care of, too. What about this regard of it? And I don't want to put words in your mouth, but... What if she was considering, okay, well, what about the fact that right now I'm the breadwinner and when I have the child, maybe I am going to decide that I want to stay home. But currently, if he's going to be valeting, I don't have that option. Jay owned a skateboard shop. Yeah.
I think that that's a perfectly valid feeling. I'm saying you don't have to have a ton of money. No, it's not a ton of money. You make sacrifices. But if he's working part-time to support three people. If he's making $45,000 a year, they could still live. You guys are making made-up numbers. These are made-up numbers. This is in San Diego. And what about this? You could still live on $45,000. Part-time. What's going to happen when they go to the pediatrician? Dude's going to pull out a wad of dollar bills and start paying the doctor, you know? Why would he do that? He goes to the bank like everybody else. He has a credit card like everybody else. Okay, okay. And he can afford insurance like everybody else. Can he? Yeah, I mean, there's programs in place. That's the deal, though. If dude has the wherewithal to be like, hey, listen, I get paid in fives, tens, and twenties every night, and what I'm going to do is I'm going to put it all in the bank, and then I'm going to call up and get Cobra insurance on my own. Really? Yeah. Which is going to be what? Bro, you do what you got to do for your kids. I bet you he's not. I don't know. We don't have kids. We don't know. That's what we did. I ran a skateboard shop. You know what I did? I got insurance. Running a skateboard shop is a lot different than ballet. It is. Because it's like owning your own business. I had knee pads and elbow pads. I skated most of the day while Kim sat in the shop. Mr. Motivated. Yeah. And Kim sat in the shop. He's different.
They both work together. But it's also different for the woman. If she needs to have kids, or if she's going to have kids, she's going to go on maternity leave. Something that I'm looking into, you know, because that's going to be happening to me. And maybe she doesn't get paid while she's on maternity leave. Maybe. What's going to happen? Is she having a baby in Nazi Germany? A lot of people don't. You get disability from the state. I guarantee I know people that have gone on maternity leave and didn't get paid. Nothing. No, with full-time jobs. Where are they working? You get disability from the state, which is not the same as what your job gives you. And I think Lauren had a good point. I don't think there's anything wrong with a woman saying, hey, listen, I'd kind of like to take a little maternity leave and have my hubby take care of me. I don't see anything wrong with that. I think that's great. I'm into those kinds of values. I got no problem with it. Listen, I just like to stir the pot up because I got a radio show. Yep. And so I like to go, well, what if this sucker was turned around? Truth of the matter is, I'm like, hey, ballet guy, grow up, Peter Pan. Get a job with some benefits. Truthfully, because I like the whole. Just go out to the orchard and pick one off a tree, man, because they're everywhere. You can go find them anywhere. What I'm saying is owning a skateboard shop, maybe someone's running.
I said owning, running. What's the difference? Maybe he was. Did you own it, Jared? Yeah, I owned it. Oh, you owned it. Nice. I thought you ran it. Okay. Owning a skateboard shop. No, it's not the same thing. I manage a McDonald's. I don't own the freaking McDonald's. Do I? Okay. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is he's owning a skateboard shop. Maybe that's what he wanted to do his entire life. It's different compared to valet. Maybe he wanted a valet. I'm saying every day when he wakes up and goes to work to valet, like, yeah, I love my job. You know what I mean? Maybe he's stoked. But that ain't, dude. And I don't buy this bit of like, there's just no way. Listen, I understand that there are people who are finding it hard to get a job. I get that. Sure. My wife, my brother, my dad. I understand. All of them. My whole freaking family. I don't think that's what she's saying. Your nephews, your nieces. I understand that there are people that are having a hard time getting a job. Obviously, there are. But it's also, you can't say, there's just no jobs available. So you know what? Why have any ambition to give it a shot? Because you know that there's a lot of people that, as many people as there are busting their humps out there to try to find a job, there's as many people that aren't. This guy's not. He is working. Okay, but he's not.
Busting his hump to try to get a better job. How do we know? She said he lacks ambition. He's working. She said he lacks ambition. It's for her. It's all about what his aspirations are. We don't know those. Yeah, we don't know those. I know. I wish they would call. I know. I want to talk to them. 570-1949. Hot topic. Phone lines. Every line is lit. Texts are blowing up. We have hundreds of texts coming through. I forgot you. 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. This summer, whether it's a planned escape or a day under the radar, wink, wink, take it off with all-natural pop chips. Never fried, never baked, they're popped. A tasty new way of popping in the flavor for a chip so crispy and delicious, you won't even notice it's, well, I hesitate to say, healthier. With all the flavor and less than half the fat of fried chips, fewer calories, who wouldn't want to pop one in their mouth? So pop over to Henry's Farmer's Market to get your pop chips. Also, pop over to FM949SD.com for your chance to win an STA Travel No Regrets New Orleans vacation, courtesy of Pop Chips and STA Travel. Relationships can last a lifetime, like those between people who work and serve together, and even between member and credit union. A relationship with Navy Federal can see cars and homes financed. It can last through deployment with programs designed for active duty through retirement and beyond.
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This report is brought to you by SeaWorld. SeaWorld's festival of Latin music, food, and fireworks ends this weekend. Performing live at Shamu Stadium on May 22nd, AP Quintanilla y Cumbia All-Stars. And on May 23rd, Elvis Crespo. West Ash Street at South Mission Road, an injury accident here. It's shutting down the road due to a downed motorcycle. Looks like this rider is down in the middle of the freeway. An ambulance is on the scene. They've also got a flatbed truck on the scene. The 94 westbound at 25th Street, multi-vehicle accident this morning. Four cars, they're all stuck together in that scene. center divider, and Via de la Valle eastbound ramp to the 5. We've got an accident, this one sitting on the right shoulder. A couple cars involved in this collision. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I make up lyrics if I don't know. Woods. I remember my first French kiss. Lauren. If there's a movie with Meg Ryan in it, I'm like, I'm out. Zienna. Put my head down because if I hear someone cry, I cry. And Jay. Please grow up. On FM 94.9. Oh, we're kids. Something's not right with me. Hey, by the way, Broken Bells performing live. Coming into Tommy's show today. That'd be at Humphreys tonight. Yeah, well, it's before their show at Humphreys, but yeah. They're coming in. They're going to perform. Yeah. That's a dude from the Shins and DJ Danger Mouse. You know that. Money. Danger Mouse. That's a good record, too. 570-1949.
There's a lot of people calling about this topic. Hot topic. Very hot topic. We talked about it the entire commercial break. Yeah, we did. We talked about it and I was trying to convince both Woodsy and Jay. I was trying to convince the men that it's right for a woman to want a guy to have more ambition. Yeah, it's not about and it's not about that. Like someone had just. posted something to the Mikey show fan page about you can't just you know get the position that you want overnight and it's not about about seeing that and it's not even about for me a paycheck it's about okay do you want like It's sexy to see someone that wants more for themselves and wants to be a successful person, whether it be the best valet out there. That's a line in Gold Digger, that song by Kanye West. He said he got that ambition, baby. He's going to make it out of that Datsun, some bit like that. Girls love that. Is that what I just said? Girls love that stuff. Yeah, ambition. It's sexy. Girls love that stuff. Yeah, it is. I mean, it's the same reason why.
Girls, you know, get their panties in a bunch when they see the quarterback or they see someone playing a rock star on stage. It's like, wow, that's that's talent. And it took like it takes it's different. It takes focus to get there. And I've said this, too. I believe that on many levels, the way that men and women are attracted to one another is plumage. Yeah. Feathers. Feathers. Brightly colored feathers. Absolutely. And the way that it works is a guy's able to throw a football 60 yards down the field. And when he does, people clap and cheer. And to a woman, that's plumage. Just like to a guy, women have plumage. They smell nice. They look nice. Boobs. Seriously. I mean, men and women are attracted to plumage. Now, me, as you can see. I was not born with a tall gene. Okay? And so I'm not going to be throwing a ball 60 yards down the field. Really? No, I'm not. But I do have something different. Now, and I heard Howard Stern say this one time. Many people may say the only reason that she's going out with him is because he's Howard Stern. Right.
What that means is that he has something special. It's his plumage. He's extraordinarily funny or whatever. It wouldn't be that 50 million hanging out of his pants, would it? How did he get the 50 mil, by the way? I know, being Howard Stern. Building a dynasty. And he built it on being really funny and doing all the things that he did. Somebody could say the same thing about me. Well, the only reason Mikey's got a really, really gorgeous wife is because he's Mikey. Look at him. He's five foot nothing. Not very good looking. How come he's got a good look? Why does he have a good looking wife? Well, obviously, I had some kind of humor. I had some intelligence. I had some humor. I was able to make her laugh. I was able to do this. And there was something that was able to allow me to be on the radio. Now, I will tell you this because I will feel sick to my stomach if I don't say it. First of all, it isn't mine. God gave me everything that I'm able to have. It isn't mine. And I can prove it to you. If that wasn't true, then that means that Sean Merriman could have woke up when he was 14 years old and said, I want to play for Maryland and then the Chargers. I don't have any talent, but that's what I want. He has it. Done. Didn't happen that way. He was given that talent. We can't decide to have talent. Sienna reads the news better than anybody I've ever seen. And I mean in radio. I've told her that in radio. She's able to deliver news in a way that doesn't sound.
like she's reading news. It sounds like she's telling you a story. It's almost freakish. It's the truth. It's the truth. Now, she didn't decide to do that. She didn't wake up when she was 22 and go, you know what? I can't read the news, but I think I'm going to decide right now that I'm going to have this extraordinary ability to be able to deliver it this way. She has it. That's attractive. Well, some people can. get to their destination by practicing, by focusing. Yeah. And that's another kind of, it's not a God-given raw talent, but it's honing. I believe. Hoiling. It's called hoiling your craft. Hoiling your craft. And I believe that that's actually the case with everyone. I don't believe that Merriman was instantly Merriman. I believe he had to work at it. Absolutely. I had to, you know, it wasn't like, I mean, I used to, I drove home. I remember driving home, listening to. Nope, can't tell that story. Really? Can't you? Yeah, you can. Listening to what? Ambrosia? No. Asia? Way more, way more embarrassing than that. Alanis Morissette? What was the name of the band with the China Phillips? Wilson Phillips. Wilson Phillips. Oh, God, really? Hold on for one more day. Oh, my God. Good Lord. Let's hear it. Mike. Mike. Shut up. Shut up. You're letting a lot come out today, Mike.
That's enough. Curtains peeled back real good. That's enough. Dirty underwear falling out of pants. House of Cards. House of Cards. House of Cards. Don't anybody Photoshop a picture of me next to Wilson Phillips? Yeah, for sure. Carney. What's that her name? Carney Phillips? Carney Phillips and... China. China Phillips. Carney Wilson. And then a redhead for no reason. That's Carney. Yeah, a random redhead. No, there's three. Well, Carney has reddish hair. No, Carney Asada. Love that. Which part were you breaking down, Mike? You know what? Someday somebody's going to make you want to turn around and say goodbye. Say goodbye. Mike is cringing right now. Like, yeah, that's the part. Of course it is. It got you, didn't it? Of course that's the part. Were you really inspired by Wilson freaking Phillips? Uh-uh. His pen is in his mouth and he's biting it. Really? You know what, dude? Why don't you give me a break or two? Zero percent. Have I gotten a break? Ever? Yeah. We don't give breaks over here. Yeah, no kidding. If I were there with you then, I would have told you just to hold on for one more day. Just one more day. If you could have done that. Mike, I could just see him driving in his little car. Let's see what's his little car. Tiny little car. Just like, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. You're a plebeian. I was crying in my truck. Hey, ciao, dude, no! Mike, why do you make it worse?
I wish I could curse on the radio so bad right now. Hang on. You have no idea. So chubby. I was driving home. I had the worst job. Worst gas? Oh, worst job. I had the worst job. And all I could think is, all I wanted, all I wanted was to have a full-time radio job in the afternoon. What was your job? I was the overnight board operator. That is horrible. Not like a ditch digger. You're like $4 an hour. That's when you stand overnight and you take phone calls a lot of the time. I didn't even get no one calling. Yeah. No one calling. But if there was a giveaway at midnight, like call, you call her nine. That was Mike answering the phone. And you know what the deal was? It was like a satellite. Like it was a piped in satellite deal. So you just sat there to make sure that stayed on the air. Oh, I sat there. Just hitting the snack machine real good. We've all had to do that.
Eating Chinese food out of a styrofoam plate. Big giant coffee to try to stay awake. Yep. But. Wearing homemade clothes. But, Mike. Clipping your toenails. Where were you headed? What did you want? Even though you were bored up, what did you want? In my head. The reason that I cried driving home that day is because. Oh, Mike. You can't do it. No, you have to. It's because in my head I knew, oh my gosh, I have the, I know, I know, I knew in my head I had the ability to make an impact in radio. I knew that all of the guys that were my heroes, I had the opportunity to be as successful as they were because I knew that God had given me these abilities that I could really do something with. But I didn't, I honestly thought in my head, I don't have the flight time. I haven't actually been in the airplane and flown enough hours in the airplane. That's all it is. And once I fly enough hours, I'm going to do it. And all I wanted was a full-time afternoon job. The thought of working with you guys, and I told Woodsy this over the weekend. I said, I'm with the show right now that I was meant to be with my entire career. But I truly believe in my heart of hearts that God waited. He said, I'll give you that when it's time. It isn't time.
And then at the right time, he gave it to me. I said to Woodsy, I said, sometimes God takes something small out of your hands so that they can put... Sometimes God takes something out of your hands so that he can put something bigger in there. And make room for something bigger. And that's truly what I felt and what I feel it is. But it's just, it takes time. Well, I think personally, even when like guys fix stuff, build stuff, like... Do things on the computer. Any, like, little talent that people have, I find it sexy. Yeah. But not everyone, like we said, is given those talents. And a friend of mine's dad always said, if you're going to be a gravedigger, then be a gravedigger. But be the best damn gravedigger that you can be. So if this guy's going to be a valet driver, I think you maybe at least bump the hours up to full time. Maybe it's not his choice, though. Maybe he's working on it. Like, hey, you can be the best damn gravedigger alone. But you're still sitting home solo. Because if you're a grave digger, you ain't getting anywhere. That's not true. That's not true. I don't agree, Lauren. I think that everybody does have gifts. Well, everyone does. But it might not be the things that they're going to get paid the most money for. Or it might not be, you know, the places that they're going to excel. But it sounds like this guy, I don't know. I mean, it's hard to speculate without getting her on the phone. But it sounds like he's content on being part-time and just... M1 Castile.
from Escondido. Good morning, guys. Good morning. Hey, man, I just want to say, you're killing me with your revelations, your Wilson Phillips, your House of Cards yesterday, and your Chon Chon story. My 13-year-old son listens, and he looks up to you, and he listens to your podcast, and he's going to kill me when he hears this later on. I know. I'm a loser. We're peeling back the onion. Oh, Mike, you're not a loser. Great show, though. I love it. My wife loves it. My son loves it. And we listen. My son listens to it every day when I take him to school. I'm never revealing anything. Yes, you are. We'll get it out of here. Thank you. Tell your kid you better study hard. Because he'll end up by himself. Who could forget this hit from Wilson Phillips? Release me. This was... Hey, Mike, you're killing me. Well, I was a big Wilson Phillips fan, and my dad went on the airplane and came back and got an autograph from me and my sister. And it wasn't from the, like, cool blonde one. I think it was from Carney or the other redhead. And we were like, oh, thanks. Thanks, Dad. It was actually his signature. He just said it was from Carney and the redhead. Yeah, it was the most random thing. You could tell because he wrote Carney and then he wrote the redhead. The redhead. The other person.
Mm-mm-mm. I was obviously kidding about the Wilson Phillips stuff, though, wasn't I? No, you weren't. You weren't at all. Cassette tape. Yeah. Had it on cassette. Rewind. It wasn't even on the radio, which would make it even a little bit better. Had it on cassette. Yeah, you owned it. You were so kidding that you pulled it up on your iTunes instantaneously. I know. I'm sure you don't know how it got there. Rebecca, stop using my Mac. Rebecca, you can't just put Wilson Phillips songs on my iTunes. It's inappropriate and it's just weird. It's weird. I don't appreciate it either. It's really weird. It's a waste of bandwidth. It's a waste of bandwidth. If people found out that you put Wilson Phillips on my iTunes, they might think that I listened to it. And imagine what they would think of me then. Not only listening to it, but crying while listening to it. And he claims he was driving his truck. It was more like a VW Bug with a flower in the face. Mini Cooper. Jetta. Just weeping. Jetta with a flower in the cup holder.
It was the new VW. Just a girl's night out. Hey, but look. Then you became Michael Shannon. And then you became Mikey. But Mikey's been at this since he's been in high school. I know. I had the same thoughts, Mike. I like that. You made it. Hey, kid, you made it. Drum roll, please. You made it. Let me out. Let me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. Every time Mikey plays that clip, he stares at Woods. Expressionless. Totally expressionless. Like, get me out of here, Woods. And Woods gets a little sneaky little smile on his face. Every time it's the same face. Jamie was telling me this weekend about my smirk that I did. You do the smirk that I did. It kills me. Like really? The mustache only makes it worse. It pierces me. Yeah, Woods' eyes say really. It pierces my soul. Your dagger eyes pierce my heart. Your smirk hurts my soul. Your piercing eyes when I yawn, it daggers in my heart. It was on the line. Ben! From Point Loma. Hi, Ben. Good morning, everyone. What's up, brother? Thanks, Ben. So I woke up and the first thing I heard is this valley guy not making any money. And then that's just how...
You know, I just thought I need to call, you know, but what I'm trying to get over is trying to do two things. Possibly this guy, when he got together with his girl, said he's going to be this, he's going to be that. And he got so comfortable that he never showed any improvement. That's the deal. That's why I was saying earlier, the woman's got to be looking for, well, what are you doing? I know you say. Well, that's, yeah, we never really answered. She's saying, you know, what do I do? Like, I don't want to be a total jerk. I know it sounds bad, but. He's a valet, but when they first met, he was like, hey, listen, babe. I want to be a professional balloon shaper. Even when they met, he was still 38. Yeah. Think about that. He was still 38 when they met. She kind of knows what she signed up for, does she not? Maybe he was in between jobs. I'm parking cars right now, but I'm going to shape balloons. Right. I mean. I'm going to have my own shaper company. I'm going to be a shaper. We don't know. And you know what? You know what a lot of ambitious talk is? What? Talk. Yeah. Yeah. And you know how many guys I know that are like.
You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to do this. And all these guys got these little get-rich-quick schemes, and they have all this stuff that they think that they want to do, and they talk about it, and it never freaking happens. Talk is cheap. Talk is cheap. I want to know more about this guy. I know. There's so much more. When he gets home, does he just lay on the couch, or does he go and work in the yard, and the house is perfect, and he makes her dinner? I'm sure he doesn't do nothing, because she says she loves him and wants to be with him. He was totally worthless, I'm sure. Maybe she should chill out. Yeah, but you have to realize, like Lauren said, she sees ambition as something that's really sexy. So do I, and that's something a lot of girls see. Jay, maybe you don't agree. Maybe you don't need someone else to be ambitious, but maybe you want them to be nurturing, or maybe there's a different button that is a big deal for you. I love ambition, too. I think it's sexy as hell. When I get home and Jamie's like, I did this and this and this, I'm like, you know my motto, CCB. TCB, take care of business. And that's what we have to do. Did you just mess up your motto? Yeah, we didn't. TCB. Cold, cold boy. Yeah, cold, cold boy. I said TCB. At first you said CCB. No, I didn't. I was confused. I had apple in my mouth. I had apple in my mouth. I had apple in my mouth. I had apple in my mouth. Sure. I had apple in my mouth. What did you have in your mouth when you said that? Remember? My motto is coarse corn bar. I had apple in my mouth. Okay.
My motto is crisscross buns. Yeah. Cold cut bakery. Hey, you've heard me say it a million times, you guys. Crisscross buns. Crisscross buns. You know what that means. In times of trouble, you got to crisscross buns. Some people don't work. I like that. Some people don't live to work, but they work to live. Yeah, that's not good either. You've got to find the balance. Perfectville. Yeah, you've got to move to Perfectville. Just start putting out personal ads. Get your job making the $150,000. Get your house. Come on, valet drivers. Benefits. You know, the world needs valet drivers. They're not all going to be Howard Stern's ladies. No, but they're going to be single valet drivers, apparently. Wait a minute. Are you telling me that if... If Finn decided that he wanted to stay where he's at right now forever, you wouldn't say something to him like, kid, come on. We got to do something here. Great point, Mike. You would. I would say, hey, you can do whatever you want to be happy in life. And I know he's going to go ahead and do something more. This guy is obviously happy in what he's doing. And we get flags. And there I am. No, I believe Jay. I believe him. I believe him. Jay was running around skateboarding when he was 25. Then he grew up.
Right. Now he's producing, waking up at the butt crack of dawn. I fell into this. I didn't even go looking for it. There's a difference in, there's a difference in. And you just get them. Well. You don't think so, Woodsy? You don't think he'd be all over Finn going, hey, come on now. Is this couple in love? Yes. Then she should marry the guy if she loves him. Well, the thing that it doesn't say is, is he really happy? If he's absolutely happy doing the valet, then that's something she's got to take into consideration. Hey, this is pretty good because this kind of goes along with all this that we're talking about. What seven jobs earn women more money than men? Got a little list right here. Escort. Is it on there? No, there's some legitimate ones. I bet that's true. Real ones. Some legitimate ones, like a science technician. There's male and female science technicians. However, female science techs in this group that were tested earn a median of $740 a week compared to the men that earn $723. What's a science technician? I don't know. Okay. Like in a laboratory. Yeah, they do. Laboratory. They do real work. Oh, yeah. Laboratory. Laboratory. Yeah. A teacher's assistant. I mean.
All of these give different numbers, but I don't think we need to go over them. All of these women make more on average. Teacher's assistant, busser and barback, a baker, corporate director. What about a candlestick maker? Should have been on the list. Should have been the eighth on the list. An executive. Women make more money as executives than men. Really? And last dietitian. Women make more than dudes if they're executives. That's what that says. Interesting. Yep. It says females are paid slightly more than males at each rank after controlling for observed hetero... something weird. Hetero, hetero. Heterogeneity. Quit crying. Anyway, women are the best. Boys are the worst. Yeah, quit crying, women. You're making more. Look at L.O.B. Just straight facing you. Quit crying. Who's crying? Be perfect. Who's crying? Just go be perfect. 570. You're the one over there crying. 194.9. Stupid Yankees. Am I? Like Yankees. Like, there's anything to do with it. Crisscross. Crisscross buns. He said, you guys know my phrase. Crisscross apples. CCB, I mean, I mean, TCB. I said TCB. Crisscross buns. Look at the tape. Let's do it. Bullet. Pants. It does stamp stuff. It does. Like a crack addict. It's hot. Pretty famous woman sends her pretty famous husband sexy pictures of herself from time to time. Guilty.
Mikey Show now. 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Nissan. We've made our vehicles dependable, safe, and award-winning. And right now, during the Nissan National Ted Event, we've made them easier to get. With great deals on a full line of cars, crossovers, trucks, and SUVs, the Nissan National Ted Event is going on now. Get to a Nissan dealer today and get $500 bonus cash on most new Nissans. In honor of the Tour of California, that means up to $2,750 in total savings on Rogue. Consumers Digest Best Buy. Look for the tent at your local Nissan dealer and find savings on your new Nissan with $500 bonus cash on top of all existing offers. Nissan's national tent event ends soon. Get to a dealer today. $500 in select models. California residents only. Call 1-888-858-8319 for details. Begins 5-16. Cash back on new 2010 Rogue from dealer stock. Subject to residency restriction. Varies by region. And 6-1-10.
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And things clearing up on the 94 Westbound at 25th Street. We had a four-car accident in the center divider, but they've moved that over to the right shoulder. This report, it is brought to you by CarMax. CarMax will buy your car today, even if you don't buy one from them. That's why the smart choice is always CarMax, the way car buying should be. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego, a Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of The Mikey Show, FM 94.9. Welcome to Mikey Show. Five people on the Mikey Show. I'm your host, Mikey. We got Woodsy. We got Lauren. We got Sienna. We got Jay. Everyone good? Everyone is completely fine now. Well, we've had our chance to continue to argue it out on the air. Have we? Can I just say one thing? Sure. No. Then we're going to move on. Oh, boy. Someone, I think it was M1HB, said on the Facebook page, it's all about communicating. So.
I think that no matter what, this girl needs to be honest with herself, honest with him, and put it out there. Agreed. You know, Mike, if we're talking about Facebook, M1 Mark, I'm sorry, M1 Sarge said, a successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. I want to chokeslam him. I was just trying to close that chapter. I was trying to open it again. I tore the scab right off the knee. There's a reason we call him the kid. Yeah. Lauren had just put, Lauren had just in the most tender and sensitive way, she put a little band-aid on the whole thing and then she kissed it. Little tiny kiss. Now you feel better? Woodsy came over with sandpaper gloves. And he ripped it right off. And he put salt water right in it. Thanks, buddy. Let's see. Okay, so there is a pretty famous woman. And one of the things that she does to... turn her man on is she sends him sexy pictures. Can we guess? Yeah. I've been really like the whole commercial break. I'm like, who is this girl? Who do you think it is? Who is this girl? Jennifer Lopez. It is not Jennifer Lopez. Jennifer Gardner. It is not Jennifer Gardner. I don't know why I thought Ben Affleck. However, her name does start with a J. Jamie Woods. It is not Jamie Woods. How do you know? Trust me.
It's a husband and wife? It's a husband and wife. It's not Jennifer? Julie? Judge Judy. Judge Judy? I just threw up a little. Yes, take this picture of my breasts. Jada Pinkett Smith. Oh, yes. I don't know what you do to keep this flame burning as hot as it seems to me. You know, one of the things that I realized about will to keep it spontaneous. I really surprised him because he's a thinker. He's always in his hand. Take a sip of this. He's always thinking. I just, I always surprise him. I always surprise him. Now, I don't know if you want to get in on how I surprise him. I wouldn't mind hearing one or two. Well, like, even during the day, I might send a sexy picture of some sort.
Hey, Mom. Mikey just reached in his shirt with a fake camera. Just a reminder. Just a reminder of what's waiting at home. I'm trying to stay married, dude, not get divorced, okay? I don't need to be sending pictures of myself to my wife. He might take a little break. Make her sit. I'm trying to stay married. You don't need to be sending pictures of myself to my wife. Will Smith, I bet his phone's going to get jacked. Oh, my gosh. I didn't think of that. You know what I mean? Yeah. He's going to be on the set and his phone's going to be sitting on his little chair. And someone's going to go, yoink, ATMZ. He has the most sought after phone. I hope not. I think it's great. Yeah, it's great. I think it's awesome. Great way to spice up. Those two kind of annoy me, but. Me too, man. She annoys me, but I like Will. You don't think that's kind of cool? No. Not why? It's for the bedroom, dude. What? Your wife is trying to, you know. Now it's weird. Well, you have to think about. You think it's weird? Yeah. The pictures? Yeah, I don't know. You have to think about them, though, because he's always away, you know, doing movies and whatever, so they don't get to see each other a lot, so he doesn't get to see that. I want your wife spicing you up a little bit. It's a nice little snack pack. Yeah, dude, I'm all about spicing it up, but. When you and Jamie were living, she was in Texas.
You were here. Wouldn't it have been nice to get a little pic? Dirty pics. You were chatting online. You used to be topless, though. You would be topless. I would be topless. You would be topless. On Skype. But we never were like, all right, I'm going to take your bra off. Never. Never. Ever once. Kid's a private guy. Yeah. Yeah, right. Aren't I? Kid's an open book. Is he? Kid wears his heart on his sleeve. Does he? A lot about this kid you don't know. Do tell. Creep me out. How about this one? You guys know who Laura Ling is? Nope. She was actually taken into journalist, taken into custody by the North Koreans when she was over there doing a story on North Korea. How'd she get out of it? Never mind. I was trying to overthrow the government. And at one point, didn't you tell them I was trying to overthrow the government? Yes, I knew that that was the confession that they wanted to hear. And I was told, if you confess, there may be forgiveness. And if you don't, if you're not frank, if you don't confess, then the worst could happen. And so it was the most difficult decision to have to do that. I didn't know if I was sealing my fate and could be sent out to a firing squad the next day. What would you do? Geez. Would you confess and say that you were a spy? No. You would not? No.
It depends on what tactics they were using against her to try to get her to say that. Would you, Sienna? I would keep my mouth shut until I had some sort of a lawyer. They ain't giving you no lawyers. Well, I would keep my mouth shut. Mom, I want a lawyer. I know I'm in Korea prison camp. Let me talk to Mom. They have to give you something eventually. No. She was there for a little while. Even in Broke Down Palace. No. She was in Thailand. She got some sort of a lawyer. No, man. But you're dealing with... You were dealing with North Korea. How about I just stay in the U.S.? Listen, you don't have any argument out of me for that. She's a journalist. I don't want to go anywhere. That's what she does. It's hard to get me to go to Florida. Do you guys send dirty pictures? It just happened. I want to know. I know. We were talking about North Korea. Kim Jong-il? That got you thinking about Kim Jong-il? My head is still thinking about dirty pictures. Weird. Do you guys send dirty pictures? No. Do you get them? No. Do you? My whole family is in San Diego. I'm not talking about this. Oh, well. Do you? Wow. See what I mean? You're a wild child. Good Lord. All right. I'll take some peace shots later. Wild child. I didn't say anything. She wanted them from you. It's a little different for a guy to send them than for a girl to send them. Really, Woods? Jamie's going to go, hey. Hey. What is this? You green, dirty, big. Yeah. There's no way if Jamie.
If Jamie sent you a picture of her, like just the top, like chink, you'd be like, yes. I would be in on it. It would just be weird because we've never done it. We've been together nine years. I'd be like, whoa, what the hell is that? You would immediately call and go, what are you doing? Yeah, I would. Wouldn't you? Yeah. I'd go, thank you. I mean, we've done like the dirty text. I'd be like, I'd be like. Hey, are you cheating on me? You meant to send this to somebody else. What is this? Exactly. I think maybe you need to talk about it beforehand. Say, hey, how about we spice things up this way? Because if you got one on the slide, you'd fall out of your chair. Oh, yeah. I'd be like, what is going on here? And then wouldn't she be on the other end going? Right. Sometimes, though, it's fun. Jade is right. Spice it up. She is right, but maybe you got it. soften the blow a little bit. Yeah, a little bit. Oh, you guys, you would love it. Really? Yes. You know that your husband is going to be like, did you mean to send this to me? If you never did that before. Well, I didn't. After nine years, if I got one right now, a topless picture of Jamie, I'd be like, huh. You'd be stoked. What the hell? What is going on? No, I would call and go, what are you doing? You'd be stoked and you'd be like, Mike, I got to go home.
No, you feel like, I don't know what's gotten into you, but I like it. Yeah. See, it would just be weird after nine years. Not that I wouldn't like it, because I'm all the way in. She's got a nice set. Oh. Yeah, she does. Did you really have to give me the shoulder shrug as if to say, hey, what are you going to do? Where are the gold at? Nice rack on my old lady. Bunch of pigs. Oh, my gosh. Are we? Yeah. We're a bunch of pigs, and she's the one sending dirty texts. How's that work? I don't know where to go. It is. I want to go. It's a little different, though. Give me to go. I want to go. For you guys, like, I wouldn't really recommend you sending a picture with you. Like, she'd be like, that's a whole different ball game. That's so creepy. It's a whole different ball game. Look at Lauren. She's all the way on board. Yeah, I mean. You got the goods, show them off. Yeah, well, and if you don't, don't. Yeah, it's true. All right? You don't want to see this naked body. But if you don't, your wife knows. Like, you know, I know what I got. Yeah, great. She's satisfied with what she got. Mikey just retched. He's pretending to be Rebecca. Rebecca would not gag.
Rebecca has three children. She loves you. That's right. If you got it, flaunt it. She does love me. If you got it, flaunt it. In the dark? In the dark. So anyway. I love this show. Let's see. It's L.O.B. She is, right? A little Dirt McGirt over here. She is Dirt McGirt. Sometimes that L.O.B. can be like the sauciest one. And that's with Woodsy in the room. Yes. What was the headline yesterday? Oh, yeah. We were doing Onion headlines off the air. I go. I was creating headlines like from the Onion. The magazine. Yeah. And it was local girl is pervert. Biggest pervert in the room. Yeah. Lauren O'Brien, biggest pervert in the room. The byline is Woods in room also. Pretty bad. That is bad. Pretty bad. Yeah, it is. Sometimes I just let one slip past the goalie, you know? That's a creep. Can we please... There are people that are like, can you guys isolate the L-O-B laugh? My wife is one of them, dude. I can't recreate it. Jamie tries to do it on the couch. She loves it so much. Really? There's been a lot today. It's just like it's quiet and then it's... Can't do it.
It's the greatest. M1 Woodchip from San Marcos. What's up, dude? What's going on, guys? What's going on? This was going on probably about six months ago. I was out of town for work for like a week. And I'm sitting, I'm having breakfast with a guy I work with. And we're sitting there and I have this email that we're going over. I'm showing it to him on my cell phone. And he's reading it. And me and my girl, we've never been the type to send each other text messages at all. No text. Dirty text. I would have loved to have gotten kind of a heads up because she sent me a text message. I'm like, oh, let me check this real quick. And I open it and then boom. And he's sitting right next to me looking right at my phone. And the look on his face was more excited than I was. Picture or text? It was a text message. But it was a picture text or was it just? It was a picture text. Does she know that? You have to be so careful. Yeah, Woodchip, does she know that he saw? Oh, yeah. She was so embarrassed, and I've kind of ruined my chances now from getting any more. Yeah, you're done. And now you just called us, and we've all met your girlfriend because she was in studio. Wow. Now my mind is racing. See, I've done that, too. You haven't? Lauren! Lauren! What?
Your boy has seen, like, his friends were there when it happened? Yeah. No way. No way. No way. It's embarrassing for, like, five minutes, and then you're like, eh. Eh. What are you going to do? What are you going to do? I'm very disappointed. Another mom. Does anyone know? Okay, explain it. I got to explain. I got to explain. I got to explain. I got to explain. Let me explain. Please? Please? Yep. Let me explain. Do it. You have to. Done. So every once in a while. My face is crimson. Lauren told us this off the air.
There was a reason for that. Not now. Now I got to. Mikey's dirty underwear fell out of his jeans. I put my pants on campus one time. Opening break, I talked about how I farted and woke myself up. It's all good. Have we been that toilet-y today? I didn't talk about my poop story, but I've talked about it before on the air. Until just now. I cried and listened to Wilson Phillips. Yeah, there you go. You know what I mean? Is this a day of confession? It's a safe tree. It's a safe tree. It's a safe tree. It's a safe tree. Off the air, Lauren told us that her mom has this running bit. And the bit is that she'll be talking to Lauren, totally normal, and she'll go, hang on a second, your other mother wants to talk to you. And all of a sudden, she'll pretend that she's rustling the phone. And then other mother gets on the phone and goes, hi, Lauren. Hi, Lauren. In that exact voice. In that voice. And she goes, hi. Hi, other mom. Hi, other mom. And she goes, what are you doing? No, I don't even say hi, other mom anymore. You just sit there? I'm like, okay, mom, it's enough. I get it. Already? Yeah. Why? I love it because it's like, you totally know where Lauren gets her voices from. Yeah. 100%. And her mom will go, I can't believe your other mother.
I can't believe her. Multiple personalities. And then she and then she pretends to wrestle the phone away and she goes, I'm sorry. I can't. I can't believe her. And Lauren's just sitting there like, oh, my gosh, mom, I'm 29 years old. You've been doing this forever. Hello, San Diego. So we do it all the time off the air. I'll be like, we'll be talking about something totally serious and it'll be quiet for a second. I'll go. I don't know. Let's ask other moms. I don't know either. It kills us. I did it at the meet and greet. You kept asking me if I was going to come to dinner and I kept skirting the issue. And then you were like, I want to know if you're going to go to dinner. It's the greatest, greatest thing I've ever heard. Other mom. Other mom. Other mom. At your wedding, percentage of chance at the reception, your other mom takes the mic to say a few words. Percentage of chance. Assuming we move to Fantasyland and there is a wedding, which takes place where I am the bride, then 95%. 95% chance. 98%. 98%. There's a wrestling bit on stage. She does the bit. She grabs the mic away and she goes, I want to say something new. But like, it wouldn't be your wedding without other mom. It's like, that's your other mom. Other mom's been around since.
graduation, I think. High school? First time she pulled out other mom. It was sometime in high school. I think it was because I was so embarrassed by my regular mom that she created like an alter ego that would make me laugh. She's the funny. That's 100% why. That's a great reason. Now the first time she did it, was it funny? Yeah. Oh, I used to get the biggest kick out of it. So when she first started doing it, it was great. She's never stopped. She's like, yes, I'm back in. That's great. She's never stopped. Lauren will get messages and we beg her. We're like, please let us play him on the air. So bad. Please let us play him on the air. Oh, Lauren, you, I mean, seriously. Seriously. Next one I get. I'll have to get my mom. I'll have to get other mothers permission. No, no, no. She doesn't care. What's she going to do? You're a grown woman. Don't I have to? You're grounded, Lauren. Don't blame my mother. Mom, I'll throw my mom under the bus any day. I'm going to consult the lawyer. This is Lander. You're going to be a libel. You can do it all day. That's so great. I love it so much. I want to hear Hoyle talk to other moms. Do we call your mom? I want her to do it. Do you think she'll answer? Can we call her right now? Is she listening online? We're talking about it. Please, God. Please, God. Please, God. She listens on Thursdays. I mean, she never listens. So wait.
Does she work in a place that she can't be other mom? She's working, she works in a doctor's office. So unless all the patients want to hear other mom. Next time she leaves a message, please save it. Greatest thing ever. Other mom's great. Did you, and you know, it's a great topic too, is did your parents do stuff that, or do they still? Like you're a grown adult. They still do stuff where you're just like, mom. Or dad. Todd. Mom. Mom. Do your parents do that? 5701-949-949mikey at gmail.com. My mom and dad, my mom and dad, they don't do it in front of me, but they will tell people. They will work into a conversation that they're Mikey's mom and dad. Oh, yeah. My mom will work in a conversation. They do? Still? They're proud. You know what? As soon as my dad got a nice table at a restaurant, he was like, Mikey's dad. Lauren, that's Lauren's mom. Remember at Kehlani's? She was like, that's Mikey. They're on the Mikey show. That's Mikey. It was pretty awesome. Let me put it this way. I go to Kehlani's often now because I know who I am in there. Can I walk in there? Yeah, they took care of the kid. It's great food. It's phenomenal. What do your parents do now you're a grown adult? Maybe you're in your 30s or your 20s or even your 40s, and your mom or your dad will still just kill you, embarrass you doing this when you're around them.
Does your mom still straighten your clothes on your body? Like, will she straighten your clothes up or she'll lick her finger? You're 35 years old. She licks her finger and cleans something off your face. And you're like, you let her do it. But you're like, you're just kind of like, wow, I am a grown up. My grandma tells me I need lipstick always. You need in front of whoever's there. You need some lipstick. My mom says that to me. I don't wear lipstick really, you know? It's funny because my wife, Rebecca, said, That she totally gets that now. And she said, there's no way those boys will ever not be my babies. I know. I'm my mom's baby. I think she probably still sees you as her little boy. You're a grown adult man. But in her eyes, you're probably still her little boy. Well, in fairness to her, he's wearing a diaper. That's true. I mean, in all defense. In all defense to her. In all defense to Lauren's mom, you know. Yeah. What's the defense? What's that? You still suck your thumb. I suck my thumb. Yeah. We should save that as a clip. Lauren sucks her thumb. Didn't I trial off? No, you didn't, Lauren. Stop it. That voice. We need to go on a break. Gosh, I want her mom on the phone. Mom, get her mom on the phone. Mom, call Lauren's mom. M1 Pete downtown. Go ahead, Pete. Grow up then. Come on. Pete, you there?
Yeah, I'm here. Go ahead, man. The one I hate is like you go to your mom's house or whatever and she's, hey, honey, here goes Miss Jones. Give her a hug. And you only met Miss Jones once when you were like three. Yeah. And your mom's still ordering you to hug people? Yeah. You're like, okay. Oh, yeah. Let me give you a hug. The ass out, pat on the back. The ass out hug. My mom does the bit always where she's like, because we have a lake house in Dallas and my nanny. who's her mom, lives next door. I get there, she's like, you need to go over and see Nanny. You need to go over and visit. I'm like, dude, I was going to, but now that you told me I have to, I don't want to go anymore. Nobody tells the kid what to do. Nobody tells the kid what to do. She knows that. Marrakesh Express. That was so scary. Do it again. That was so scary, guys. Do it. I thought there was a DVD. Start it over. I looked at each other. I was like, shh, shh. You scared me to bed. It's not even in English. That scared me so bad. Oh, my gosh. Hey, don't go anywhere because we got new releases. I've got to tell you what this girl did.
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FM 94.9 recommended artists Broken Bells coming to Humphrey's. Tuesday, May 18th. New band, new sound. Performing songs from their critically acclaimed debut album Broken Bells. Humphrey's concerts present Broken Bells with special guests The Morning Benders. Tuesday, May 18th. Tickets available at Ticketmaster.com or at the Humphrey's box office. Presented by your San Diego County Lexus dealers. Produced by AEG Live. Someone say Jim Morrison had issues. A few. Welcome back. People are calling to tell us about how their parents do stuff that embarrasses them. Really? Yeah. Lauren's mom does other mom. Is it other mom or second mom? What is it? What are we going to call her? Is it other mom? Other mom. Other mother, I think it is. Other mother. Genius. Everyone mean Gene from Georgia is on the line. Hi. Gene. What's going on? Are you in the bathroom?
No, I'm in my room by myself. My room's made of tile and it has a toilet in it, but yeah, I'm in my room. Sounds like a bathroom. What are you doing, Mean Gene? The kid's off of the pool, all right? Leave me alone. He is right now. I guarantee he is. So what were you calling to tell us? All right, well, I was hearing the POB story, and I immediately... Oh, man. Guys, you have to make some room in the safe tree for me, all right? I'm nervous. Oh, no. Oh, no. It's awkward. Anyway, never fails. Every time I bring a girl home. That sounds weird. It's not like I bring a girl home every week or something. That's weird. But when I do, it never fails. My mom breaks out the photo album, and there's one picture that she has to show her. And she tells them the great story of how I wasn't circumcised at birth. I was circumcised when I was three. There's a picture of me coming out of surgery.
Every time. Never feels that big. She shows them the picture? Oh, 100%. Oh, my gosh. The piece was hopefully in bandages. Oh, it is. Because, you know, it's like five foot of bandages at least. Wait. Mean Gene. Why did your mom wait until you were three? Why did she wait until you were three? I had a urinary tract defect. Okay, great. Well, that was fun. Thanks for taking us on that ride. I thought she just had a change of heart. Sorry I asked. I'm glad it's all good now. Woodsy is pushed away from the microphone, smiling, and he looks like he's stunned. You have to be supportive right now, okay? Hey, we're supportive. Man, I'm so glad it all worked out. Good for you? I hope, yeah. Congratulations, bro. I hope you don't remember that surgery. Do you, Mean Gene? Do you remember? Oh, 100%. Oh, no. Do you remember it? Mean Gene. They had to fix it, and so they had to take this long glass tube catheter to fix it. Is that like your first memory? Yeah, pretty much. It was the worst one you could ever have. Because just imagine every time you go into the bathroom as a kid, not like as an adult where you can deal with the pain.
But every time I'd go to the bathroom, it was like someone was stabbing me in my kidneys. Oh. I've never felt, like, when dealing with pain, lucky to be a woman. But I do right now. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. That's horrible. I love Mean Gene. Wow. Thank you, Mean Gene. Love me some Mean Gene. All right, guys. Love you guys. Later, brother. I'm glad that they do that when you're two days old. Oh, that's so, yeah. They do it different now. Yeah, they do. They do it different now. Well, each doctor has their own deal. But the twins were done differently. Really? One guy did the snip because he's old school and he prefers the snip. It's the way he was taught. He's an older doctor. He does the snip. But there's a new method that is perfectly symmetrical and it's just like a rubber band. Oh, like when they do the dog's tails? Exactly the same concept. How long does that take? It takes about a week. It just falls off. Oh, my God. Falls off. Oh, my God. No. That's what happened with the twins? Yeah. The rubber band? Yeah, it was actually better. Didn't it make you, didn't you just feel so bad sending them in? Oh, let me tell you. How do they pee pee? Did you find the nubbin? It's on the outs. How do I explain this? That's pretty cool, though, that they have that. You do. Did you find it? Well, yeah, it falls off in the dipe. It's like the umbilical cord. It just falls right off. It's like an umbilical cord. Did you save it?
Yes, Woods. Ew, Woods? Make it into earrings? Made a wallet out of it. They did. They did on Meet the Fockers. Meet the Fockers. She saved it. No, no. Lace not, want not, Mike. Yeah. Okay. Did you go in and watch, Mikey? No. I did. You did? You watched the snip? I watched the snip, yeah. Of all of them? Yeah, of all of them. I didn't get to see the other ones, but, well, Finn. But it was insane. And the little kid was just going, what? No way. No way. No way. How did they, like, hold the kids down? It was awful. They put him, like, his arms were in, like, a little pillowcase, and he lays on top of the pillowcase, and so he can't really wiggle all that much. I thought he was wiggling anyway, but man. You just have to think how many times a day they do it. It's not like you think. It is like you think. It's not pinched clothes? No, let me explain. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. This day is a strange day. Here's what I think they do, okay? He's demonstrating with a napkin, folding it up. They take a band. That's pretty generous. That wraps like this. Okay. Putting it on the edge of his finger. Then they pull it down and over. Okay. And then they put the band over that. Oh. So there's like something that's holding, you know, like. Yeah, I got it. Okay. Yeah. So they put a band around it, fold the flap over the band, and then pin it down. You'd know because they'd freak. They don't. They don't freak. That's rad. How do they still go? It's, it's. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I asked.
I asked that. It's all open. Yeah, but still. The turtleneck is folded down. That's a great way to put it. The turtleneck is folded down. I think the problem is I don't even know what it is. Okay, I'll show you later. I didn't mean that. I didn't mean it like that. Let me dig in my phone. I may have an old picture. Oh, gosh. But anyway, it's a more humane. It sounds way more humane, dude. It is. Let me tell you. The first time that we, when we did Jake, let me tell you something. They give you a million options. You can do it this way, you can do it this way, you can do it this way. The best option that we heard is, and the option that most parents opt for is, you leave them here. Go down and get a cup of coffee downstairs. Come back up in 20 minutes and get them. Heck no. I could never do that. I would do that. I would go to Cairo and then come back. If you think about the rubber band, it could be faulty. What if it doesn't work? What if it falls off, the rubber band? A faulty rubber band? You know what I mean? It could go wrong. It could fall off. They have it figured out. You won't have a choice.
The guy, that's what Kim said. You do not leave that baby's side. And that baby was never without one of us the whole time. I would be. I'd go to Cairo. Well, now, the only, this may have made a difference to you. Is that this was, this woman that did it for Jake was a friend of ours. We knew her. We've known her for years. You guys did it at the house? No, we did it at her office. But she's a pediatrician. So we said we're taking her to Dr. Melissa. Because we know her. So we took her to her and she did it. Jay, I see, like, you stayed there. I couldn't watch my kid in that much pain. No way. No way. No way. I would vomit and I would cry. I'd be like, what are you doing? Oh, dude. What are you doing? Let's step outside. Maybe I snip you. Doesn't matter. I'll lose my mind. Maybe I snip you. Doesn't matter. You have to stay there. Yeah. How do you know her? She just wrote on a piece of paper. Your pediatrician's name? Yeah. How do you know her? My sister has the same one. That's our friend. She's not here anymore. Wow. But she's a good friend of ours. She's moved, right? Yeah. Yeah. Minnesota. Yeah. I know because it's the same name as my ex-boyfriend's sister. Really? And my sister's like, oh, yeah, we're doing a little... Sorry, we're doing... Yeah, I know. It is. Sorry. A doctor's name is so-and-so. Yeah. Wow, that's kind of cool. Anyway. It's a small world. Yeah, but listen, I can't handle... I have issues from my own childhood with safety. And I mean safety like, am I okay? Am I going to get hurt?
You know, and so whenever a kid used to be with Jake, whenever Jake would cry, oh, freaking me out. Oh, yeah. Couldn't handle it. Now, though, you know, as as we now we have kid two and three, it's so much easier, like so much easier. Now you actually rinse the pacifier. Now you you don't necessarily bother about rinsing the pacifier. You're not boiling it every time. No, no. Oh, what a day. Yeah. Learn something new. Duffy. Want to know about the chocolate milk diet? Me too. So what do you want to do tonight? I don't know. You are so hard to read. Are we having a fight in the convenience store? I just wish you were more like this new Coors Light cold activation window. It's a hole in the box, Rob. Look, it's a window to refreshment.
I know the beer is cold before I buy it because I can see the mountains are blue on the labels. Fine. Then get the Coors Light and invite your friends over tonight. That's a great idea. I will. The new cold activation window from Frost Brewed Coors Light, the world's most refreshing beer. Coors Brewing Company, Golden, Colorado. With great beer comes great responsibility. When you promise to be the station that doesn't waste your time, every minute counts. At 10 News, every night starts with 10 minutes of nonstop news, highlighting today's major news and covering late-breaking developments in just 10 minutes. When you want news, turn to 10 News. ABC Tonight. There is a war at hand. A war for our souls. We are time. This is it. The V season finale has arrived. It was in striking range of Earth. The visitor's plan for our planet will be revealed. The humans won't know what hit them. But revolution is at hand. Let V no longer stand for visitor. Let V stand for victory. It's East V, the season finale. Watch it live. Tonight on ABC10. Make the switch to 10 news in the morning and you could win $100.
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Lauren. I have to admit, I like partying in the USA. And Jay. I don't watch sports. I have nothing to do. If I'm not playing, I don't want to see it. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. I'm glad that was all off the air. Me too. We continued our conversation. Four minutes, I'll never get back. You loved it, Mike. You loved it. Yeah, I saw you over there teaching class. Oh, really? Diagrams and straws and there was corndogs flying around. Mikey used straws. I think I'm finally getting it. Hey, I was being clinical. Yeah, Dr. Mike. I was being clinical. I just thought, what does it look like? All right. Now I know. That's right. Knowing is half the battle. So the valedictorian. In Pennsylvania, valedictorian. Valedictorian means the highest grade point average at the school. Yeah, she had a 4.0. Really? It wasn't higher?
No, so she had a 4.0, yeah. That's the highest you can get unless it's weighted. You can get extra credit. But I don't think in college you can. In high school, it's like AP and stuff like that. But in college, they don't do that. So what'd she do? She was giving her valedictorian speech. And as she was finishing, her boyfriend was, for some reason, up on the stage as well. And she asked him to marry her at the end of her speech in front of everyone. And he had no idea. Her parents, she didn't tell anyone. What? Don't do it. That's cool. I guess all the 400 graduates along with their friends and their family, everyone stood up and cheered, and he said yes, and I was like, oh. Crazy. Oh, Mike. That's good. He said yes. Of course he did. There's no pressure. You're crazy. You're crazy. That's a pretty wrist day move. Yeah. I wouldn't say it was a risque move. Absolutely, it's risque. A, it's the girl asking. Did she do it nude? That's risque. Fine. Sorry. Risky. We're not in Paris. Oh, risque. Risky. Risky move. Okay. Yeah, risque means she was like. And I'm unzipping my robe. There's nothing underneath. There's nothing here. Baby. Very risque move.
Boo. Yeah, he had to say yes. What choice? Yeah, we'll talk about him when we get home. Exactly. Get back to the dorm. What if he's that jerk that's like, no. Would you guys want your woman to propose to you? No. Would you? You would? I don't care. Really? I don't care. I don't think it's about that. I think it's about, like, keep your shining moments separate. Yeah, the public bit. I want a story, like, of him. It's so weird. It wouldn't bother me. I wouldn't do it. Really? She takes you someplace nice and gets down on one knee? You're like, weird. Waterfall or something? I don't know. Really? Really? Really? If you can find it. If you can find it. I don't know. My wife and I, we want to renew our vows at some point, so maybe I let her ask the kid this time. That's different. First time, though? Maybe we do it sober. I don't know. Oh, my gosh. Wouldn't it have kind of creeped you out if the first time you went to some sunset place and she's like, dear. Gets down on one knee, breaks out a ring. I start dying laughing. Yeah. But that's, we're goofy like that. Yeah. I mean, if the whole thing. We're real goofy in my house. Real goofy. Are you kidding? You live with me? If the whole thing is like funny, then okay. But if it's like, if it were serious, that would, I get the creep chills. Really? Sunset? You'd probably love it. No. Yes, you would. Dude, it's the opposite of traditional.
That's my bit. It's the opposite of perfect. Oh, really? He's traditional. I like traditional stuff, dude. I'm more traditional than you'd think. You are not traditional. When it comes to that kind of stuff. She wouldn't get on one knee and ask some dude to marry her? 100% she would. No, I would not. I bet she would. You dance your way out of trouble. I'll tell you 150%, I would not. You dance your way out of trouble. That ain't untraditional. What does that have to do with traditional? You're goofy. So what? Goofy is not, hey, will you marry me? I didn't say you had to do a shimmy. That's not traditional, though. She's silly, but, like, I'm talking Woods, a serious proposal. Not to be funny, not to be silly, not to be wacky. That'd be friggin' weird, you're right. Wouldn't it? That'd be really weird. Let's say you were dating a girl, and you guys have talked about getting married. You go to Hawaii on a vacation together. You're standing there looking at the beach and she gets down on one knee. That's not going to. You're not going to go. It depends on the size of the diamond, first of all. Yeah, she'll get you a man-gagement. Man-gagement. Man-gagement. Depends on the size of the diamond because I'm all about the diamond. Wow.
I would be like, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Three-carat emerald cut. How about you get up and we do this the right way? Yeah, please. Another time on my turn. Yeah, when I decide I'm going to ask you, this is weird. What are you going to do? Start crying and go, yes. Oh, my God, I thought you would never ask. Yes, yes, yes. I would imagine when the rolls are reversed like that, there's usually not a ring and, like, down on one knee involved. Well, how does it go? Probably just, so, do you want to? Well, yeah. This valedictorian said she didn't have a ring and she did not get down on one knee. What did she say? Yeah. She just asked him, would you marry me at the end of her speech? And he said, everyone started like, you know, he was shocked and everyone started cheering. He's like, oh God, kill me, kill me. Would you marry me already? Here's M1K's girl from Carlsbad who asked her husband to marry her. Nice. There's a lot of them. M1K's girl. Hey. So did you do it in a goofy, fun, silly way? Not really. I mean, we actually were down in Mexico, down in Puerto Nuevo. And we had been engaged before. He had already asked me to marry him a few years prior. We broke up and stuff. And then when we got back together, I just thought, hey, you know what? He already did it that time. So I guess it's my turn. That's pretty cool. Yeah. Yeah. It was cool. It was really cool. He was surprised. And it was very off the cuff. I wasn't planning it at all. Are you from the East Coast?
Yeah. Go Yankees. New York. Atta girl. Go Yanks. Totally sounds like it. Atta girl. I knew I liked her. It's a little different. Is it? Well, yeah, because he had already asked her. So you're okay with that one? Yeah, special circumstances. It's almost like she should if she's the one that said no the first time and now she feels it's ready. Special circumstances. How'd you do it? Every little boy dreams of it. I know that I planned my wedding several times in my head when I was a little boy. Yeah, you're a little boy. Building houses of cards and playing with dolls. Ken and Barbie. Well, that was the difference. Get me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. Thank you, Case Girl. That makes sense. Sounds like he already put himself on the line and she didn't want him to have to, you know, muster up the courage to do that again. So she threw him a bone. How did you do it, Woods? How did I do it? We were at my family's lake house. Oh, that's right. Yeah, we had been broken up. We were broken up.
When we got engaged, which is a very interesting story. I'm the only person I know to get engaged without even dating. You end up marrying. But we've been together on and off for a while, and I had this big party. And I looked around, and there was all these girls there, and there's all these people there. And I'm watching Jamie, like, take care of everybody. And I'm watching her, and I'm looking at her, and I go, you're an idiot. You're a stupid idiot. And the light bulb went off my head. And I grabbed her, I pulled her in the back room, and I go, we should get back together. And she goes... Yeah, okay. And I go, yeah, but we're not really good when we date. Maybe we get engaged. Just like that. She's like, okay. And you said that you guys had been partying a little bit. Yeah, a couple pops. I guarantee there's people that have gotten engaged and don't remember when they wake up. We had a couple pops. I guarantee if we open the phones, it's too late now, we would get calls. Yeah, let's mark that as a thing we do. I guarantee. Hell, did your husband... Propose in a romantic way. Yes. What did he do? He did. What did he do? He... Look at her shirt. He had the ring made. My cousin's a jeweler. So yeah, Detroit. Detroit. God love you, kid. He took me to the cliffs overlooking Ahoyah Cove. Proposed there and then had reservations for us at Aqua. And we... Trattoria Aqua. And we had this really romantic dinner. And I was just like...
giddy and did you know freaking out no didn't suspect no because we uh i had been we'd been together for two years i knew he was the man i wanted to marry and be with forever uh and i had like i think i we had gotten into a fight a totally my i had instigated it like basically being like dude you know like you're killing me here come on like let's let's do this Oh, really? A marriage talk kind of deal? I was like, you know, and he was like, yeah, you know. Men love those. Yeah, men love. No, but he had already had the ring was already being designed. And he had to play it cool and be like, yeah, you know, I'm just. Not quite there. Wow. I'm close to being there. So I was, like, sad. But we were living together at the time. And, you know, I felt like it would come eventually. But I was really, like, having a rough one. Right. But he hadn't done it yet. So then he's like, I'm going to take you out to a nice dinner. But I was like, okay. And we walked up. Actually, when he started walking me over to the cliffs to see the sunset, I was like, hmm. But I was all nervous. How did he do it?
He just asked. He got down on a knee? Did he get on a knee? He didn't get on any. But you know what? Did he do a cartwheel? Yeah, he did backflip and a couple head spins. And I was like sold. Started breakdancing on some cardboard. That's right. It's a nice move. Yeah. That's pretty good. It was good. And now Aqua's like our place. Yeah. That's awesome. We go back for our anniversaries. 570-1949 is our number. And if you ever want to text us, 949-Mikey at gmail.com. Hell, what do you got coming up? Well, Broken Bells are in town tonight at Humphreys. I can't stop listening to that record. I'm going to go to the show. They're going to be here later today on Tommy's show. So I am going to play something off the new Broken Bells record. And Kings of Leon, Phoenix, the Wigs new song. It'll be good. Sweet. Lovely and talented Hillary is up next. And we'll come do this again tomorrow morning at 6 o'clock. Mikey shows up. Financial media station. Mikey in the morning. About the music all day and night. FM 94.9. It's about the music.