The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 06/03/11
Friday, June 3, 2011
pick a scenebroken anklenba finalsdr kevorkiancasey anthonythe bachelorspelling beepersonal testimonynational donut dayword of the day chinchillaflip flop debateangelina cancer
Mikey opened the show with co-hosts Woods (sports guy), Jay (producer), Lauren O'Brien (assistant producer), and Sienna (news girl), previewing the upcoming "Pick a Scene" bit where Woods and Jay would reenact the animal cracker scene from Armageddon. Woods revealed he had been walking on a broken ankle for a week after ignoring doctor's advice, sparking a playful debate with Jay about needing a doctor's note and the seriousness of the injury, while the show also covered the NBA Finals game where the Mavericks tied the series with a dramatic comeback. The program featured a range of topics including the death of Dr. Jack Kevorkian, a detailed discussion of Casey Anthony's police interrogation composure, Naomi's recollections of her time on The Bachelor, and Sukanya Roy's victory at the Scripps National Spelling Bee with the word "cymatricus". Later, Mikey shared a deeply personal testimony about surviving childhood sexual abuse, addiction, and finding faith, closing the show with an invitation for listeners to seek help via the Mikey Show website.
What happened, in order
Pick a Scene Explanation
Mikey explains how Woods and Jay will recreate the animal cracker scene from Armageddon with costumes, music, and a full reenactment.
Woods' Broken Ankle
Woods reveals he broke his ankle a week ago, avoided seeing a doctor, and now wears a boot while Jay teases him about needing a doctor's note.
NBA Finals Recap
The hosts describe the Mavericks' dramatic comeback over the Heat to tie the NBA Finals series at 1-1.
Dr. Kevorkian's Death
News is shared that Dr. Jack Kevorkian, the assisted‑suicide advocate, died at 83 from pulmonary thrombosis.
Casey Anthony Interview
Commentary on Casey Anthony's unusually calm and coherent police interrogation, noting she showed no nervousness despite the serious charges.
Naomi on The Bachelor
Naomi Goodale discusses her experience on The Bachelor, including being down to the final four and the show's editing.
Spelling Bee Winner
Sukanya Roy from Pennsylvania wins the Scripps National Spelling Bee by spelling the word "cymatricus".
Mikey's Personal Testimony
Mikey opens up about surviving childhood sexual abuse, battling addiction, and finding faith, urging listeners to seek help.
People mentioned
MikeyWoodsJayLauren O'BrienSiennaChrisRebeccaShermanGraceJack KevorkianMitt RomneyBarack ObamaJohn HuntsmanCasey Anthony
32,827 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
the mikey show it is friday with a live we got so much stuff going on man we got a lot of stuff we got to tell you that's happening in the world and just stuff that's happening in our lives all kinds of stuff is going on 570-1949 is the number and if you want to text us you can do that 949 mikey at gmail.com we do a live studio audience in here on friday and so uh it's pretty cool to have a bunch of people in here And it's going to be a big day today on the Mikey Show. We got, first of all, pick a scene coming up at 8. Which Jay is already attempting to get out of in the future. He said to me this morning, now, Mike, once we do pick a scene, don't have to do it again, right? Like we get taken out of the hopper. Yep. And I said, well, why, Jay? And he looked at me and he goes...
Shirt shake, shirt shake. Shirt shake, shirt shake. Well, what it means is pick a scene is we have two baskets on Monday, all right? One basket has all of our names in it. Okay, so we picked two names. And this week it was Woods and Jay, all right? And then the next basket is a scene. And the scene this week was the scene from, it's the animal cracker scene from Armageddon, which Jay and Woods will recreate. With, like, costume and everything. And the music and the whole deal. Woods will be wearing the same outfit that... What's her name? Grace? Liv Tyler. Grace is my character's name. Grace is the character. You're already a character. He's a method actor. Yeah, I'm a method actor. I've been wearing a dress for two days. Yeah. What else is new? Yeah, let's go ahead and save that. Isolate that clip. Isolate. Isolate. Do that at eight?
Word of the day is chinchilla. So when I say the word chinchilla between now and 10, why? What? I don't know. It's a weird word of the day. You know Rebecca used to have a chinchilla? My wife? Yeah. His name was Sherman. Cute. Wow. Totally. So when I say that, and I didn't just say it. When I say it between now and 10, I'll work it into a sentence. Could even come during commercials. You call. Caller 9 gets a pair of tickets to Indie Jam. Coastal Invasion, which is our big concert this weekend. And it's sold out, so it's kind of a cool thing. First of all, I think that a lot of people would be happy to know that today is National Day. It is a National Day. It is National Donut Day.
It's not just a made-up thing. It actually originated with the Salvation Army in Chicago in 1938 as a salute to the women who served donuts to U.S. soldiers during World War I. How about that? So it's National Donut Day. You can go by Krispy Kreme. They're offering a free donut to all their customers. Stay seated, Woods. Oh, wow. Also Dunkin' Donuts. I know they're not all over San Diego, but I've been told that there are a couple locations. You can get a free donut with a purchase of a beverage. That's cool. Easy. I wonder if they have cheesecake donuts. Cheesecake! I'm sorry, Woods. They do in a lot of places. I almost took the day off today. I know, because you knew that? It's a national donut. Have you had a donut today? I did. Oh. Weird. To commemorate. When in Rome. Yeah. You know, I mean. Except Rome is every day for you. When you live in Rome, eat a donut a day. That's true. Let's see. So.
I think it's time to unveil what is going on with our boy Woods. As you know, Woods and Jay were selected for something that we're not allowed to talk about. Yet. Yet. And, well, we will be able to talk about it at some point. The ridiculous thing is we already did talk about it. But then we were told, don't talk about it anymore. You can't talk about it. So we can't talk about it. But during... Said event, Woods injured himself. Weird. And he didn't go to the doctor. Nope. He didn't want to go to the doctor. And the reason he didn't want to go to the doctor is because he doesn't like doctors. Incident. Anyway. So, he finally made an appointment to see a doctor. And he went and saw this doctor yesterday. A week later. A week later. What's the deal, Woods? Broken ankle. Where's your cast? This is my boot. Oh, it's a boot, though. I thought for a real serious break it'd be... Did I say it was serious? I said it's broken. Your pinky toe? No, it's my ankle that's broken. There are degrees of break. Toenail at the very tip of it just came off. It's my ankle. I say, how dare Jay? Yeah, how dare Jay? Do you have a note?
A note for whom? A note for whom? From the doctor. I'll call my doctor today and see if he'll come on the air with us on Monday. Woods, did I or did I not say yesterday when you told me that you had a broken ankle, I go, Jay is going to say, well, where the hell is your doctor's note? He needs a picture of the x-ray. I predicted that he would say, where's the doctor's note? Verbatim. Yes. Why does he hate me? He thinks that you're a Sally. I'm a Sally that's been walking around on a broken ankle for a week. I do not think you're a Sally. You're a hero. You don't have to give me a reach around or anything. When Woods told me yesterday that his ankle was broken and he'd been walking, I said, listen, you don't ever have to prove your manhood to me again. This guy was walking around on a broken ankle. I think that's pretty cool, you know? Todd said, he's no pee. Yeah. That's what I said. I mean, I didn't say that, but I said it in so many words, you know? Right. I think it's... I've never been more happy to have a broken ankle in my life. And when he told me, your ankle's broken, in my head, I was like, F you, Jay. I got you. Hey, didn't you walk up here without the boot on this morning? I did. Because I can walk on it, but I'm not supposed to. I can walk on it. I've been walking up for a week. I know.
Hey, listen, I think that that's pretty incredible. Just incredible. I do. I mean, the guy was able to hobble around on something broken. I think that's kind of a big thing. What they told me is that it broke sideways. And if it breaks up, which is vertically, that's real bad. That's when they cut it open. They do surgery. He goes, you broke it horizontally. It's right across your ankle. land on it wrong, always keep your boot on if you can. And he said, if you land on it wrong, you're toast. It swelled up like a softball. Yeah, it was a big deal to me. I thought it was pretty cool. Well, you know, people were saying sprain. People were saying, you know, that's probably nothing will go away. I iced it. It just wasn't feeling better. But they said, yeah, it's broken. So I'm in this thing for a month. There's pictures of it on our Facebook page. What do you want to bet that he lasted that boot? I'd say a week. Oh, no, I'll wear it. You better wear it. I've got to get back to the field, man. It's going to take me out of my game for a month. Oh, yeah? Are they going to put you on the DL? I'm on the DL. Woods plays adult Little League. But their team really turns around. Yeah. Well, we've won three straight. There you go. Right? Yeah. So feast. They're probably going to need my 200 batting average in there. It's going to be tough. They're going to need a new nine-hole hitter. So, Woodsy, NBA Finals last night? Dude, absolutely.
Incredible. And if you didn't catch the game, we got it for you. And welcome. Mavericks. Dallas already up by six. That's just a thing of beauty. A 10-1 run now for the Heat. He was sticking his tongue out. Nine-point lead for Dallas. Wade looking. Wade puts it up. And that ends the first half. Is that a talking basketball? Largest lead of the night with 737 remaining. It's like Groundhog Day. For the Miami Heat, these fourth quarters, turning it up defensively, forcing turnovers. Ten straight points, and the lead is a dozen. An amazing comeback here in Game 2 of the NBA Finals with 57.6 seconds remaining. Dallas down by 15 with 6.20 remaining. Chalmers wide open. Wojcicki drives with underneath lefty. Banks it in with 3.6 remaining. James back to Wade. Wade puts it up for the win. Dallas has tied the Finals.
Wow. It was incredible. Dallas ended the game on a 22-5 run for the win. Oh, wow. It was one of the greatest basketball games I have ever seen. So they're going to give them a run. They're going to give them a run. It's tied 1-1. Game three is Sunday in Dallas. There you go. 570-1949 is our number if you want to call us. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. I am 41 years of age. Woodsy is our sports guy. And he is 35. And he's a big... Big Yankees fan. L.O.B., otherwise known as Lauren O'Brien, is our assistant producer and gets to go see some family. This is going to be real cool. Sienna is our news girl. She is 26 years old and has a very cute little video of her daughter Sage online right now. Oh, my gosh. Let's see. Jay is our producer. He is 47 years of age and in very good shape. And he is. I mean, listen. You've got to give the guy that. The guy is in some good shape. Yeah, I am. That's right. Don't forget it. Unlike some of us around here. Unlike Donut over there. Easy, Donut. And our phone screener today is Chris. It's Cross. It's Cross. So it was just announced. This is breaking news.
That Dr. Kevorkian, right? Yes, Dr. Jack Kevorkian, also known as Dr. Death, died at the age of 83. Now, he's actually been at Beaumont Hospital in Royal Oak for a couple weeks. He's been there for kidney and heart problems. And it appears he suffered pulmonary thrombosis. Yes, of course. Yes. Well, he also got a blood clot in his leg and it broke three. and lodged into his heart. But they're saying it was peaceful. He didn't feel a thing, but he did die at the age of 83. In case you don't know who he is, he was the guy who assisted in suicides. He was a big suicide advocate. Yes. And a lot of people had a problem with that. Assisted suicides. And, you know, yeah, people had a problem with it. I mean, he felt that it was, and he was so, you know, strong about his opinion of it that even after they'd arrested him. he would still continue to do it. I mean, he was very, he felt very, very strongly about it. Mitt Romney yesterday. Barack Obama has failed America. With that, he announced that he's running, right? Running for president. And he was the former Massachusetts governor. And one of the things that he has against him, which people are saying is going to be difficult for him to run and win, is the fact that he's a Mormon.
Fact that he's a Mormon. Yes. You think he'll win Utah? Yes. Actually, there's another Mormon that could be running. The former Utah governor, John Huntsman, is like seriously thinking about it as well. Well, I mean, I guess, you know, religion has to play a part of it for an individual person that's voting. I mean, if let's say that you're Islamic. and there's an Islamic that's Islamic American running, you might go, hey, I really like that we share the same values. Or somebody that's Buddhist and they're running, and you say to yourself, because you're a Buddhist, hey, we share the same values. Like Woodsy said, in Utah, the guy's going to do very well. And he's probably going to do very well in his home state of Massachusetts. So it just depends on what the rest of the world thinks about it. I know that Obama... Obama is Christian and really tried to downplay that. There was something called the Faith Forum that happened before the elections where they took Barack Obama and they took Senator McCain and they had them talking about their faith and asking them questions about their faith. Both of them did a very, I think, reasonable job of...
playing it very moderately and, you know, not wanting to offend anybody and that kind of deal. But I mean, you still are going to be convicted one way or the other about how you're going to vote that way. You know what I mean? And so, you know, I want to hear what he has to say about the economy. I want to hear what he has to say about all that, too. The Casey Anthony case, by the way, I got to watch some of it yesterday. Oh, yeah. Rebecca got my attention because Rebecca goes, Hey, let me tell you, she's good. Because yesterday they played back her interrogation. She's good. I mean, in terms of being manipulative, coming across very like, you know, I don't have anything to hide kind of deal. And having answers. Answers. The last thing that she sounded like during her interrogation was someone nervous. Not even.
She didn't even sound a little nervous. Even if you're innocent, you're still nervous. Yeah. It's not a position you're in every day to be interrogated by police, unless you're me. Dude, let me tell you, she was answering questions so cohesively, so easily, that there were points where it sounded like the interrogator didn't know what else to ask. Oh, wow. I'm not kidding. He would be like, you know, you'd ask her a question. And she would go, yeah, I know. I was just like, you know, I was thinking to myself, like, why are you going to go there? And he goes, is that by such and such a park? Yeah, yeah, it's that park. My mom won't even let me run there because it's so dangerous. And she just was like, you shouldn't run there. You should have put LLB in there on her. Seriously. LLB would have gotten it out of her. I'd spit on her. I know. LLB is not a fan. Strong opinion. Yeah. LLB is not a fan at all and has been very. vocal about that. Well, in the interview, investigators were pleading with Casey Anthony to tell the truth about what happened to her daughter, Kaylee. And she said, one of the investigators said, none of us sitting here believe what you're saying because everything that's coming out of your mouth is a lie. Another investigator accused her of not telling the truth as well. They said, if the main thing you want to do is find your daughter and you don't think lying is going to help us find her, why would you do that? Casey said, because I'm scared and I know I'm running out of options.
It's been a month. I'm scared. I'm scared of not seeing my daughter. That's weird. But everyone's like, you're lying. You're lying. You're lying from day one. Yeah. Well, it sounds like she's lying. Yeah. She's 25, charged with seven counts in her two-year-old daughter's death, including first-degree murder, aggravated child abuse, and misleading police. She could be facing the death penalty. Wow. Yeah. I did something yesterday that a lot of men do with their television stuff like that. If you're not a handyman, you do this. I had a problem. We had this, before we had our house built, we had them run wire, speaker wire, so I could put a radio through the whole house. So you turn the radio on, you can hear it in the whole house. So we had that done, and it's been a really awesome system. Well, the other day, all the panels in the wall that you turn it on with, they all went out. And so I decided, like a lot of men decide,
Well, I'm going to take a look at this. Just do a quick rewire. Let me just see what the problem is, and I will take care of it. Now, here's the deal. The thing that runs it is a receiver that weighs about, I don't know, 1,200 pounds, 1,300 pounds. It's a very big receiver. So like you, Mikey. Yeah, exactly. So a little bit less than you, Mike. About half your weight. Right. Not right. She would just call you receiver from now on. Yeah. Easy receiver. So I do what anybody does. I looked in the back of this thing, which had approximately, and here's not an exaggeration. This is a real number. Approximately 20 wires. Okay. 20 wire. And I did what guys do. I shook them.
I shook them. I held them. Okay. And then I realized, and all the while I'm, I'm listening to see if noise starts, you know, cause that's how you fix it. You go that you shake it a little bit and then you don't hear anything. I'm like, you know, my expert in my expert opinion, I need to go further now. Right. And so, uh, I took out my iPhone. And I have an app on there that's a flashlight. I'm like, I need a flashlight. Most men would have an actual flashlight. And I use the one on my iPhone. So I'm like, well, obviously the problem is I can't see the wires properly. So now I see the wires. I'm looking at them. And I realize, oh, I know what the problem is. I need to turn this thing on its side. I don't know why, but I need to turn it on its side. All right? So I turn it on its side, and that doesn't fix the problem. So I went up. I need to jiggle while it's on its side. Jiggle a little bit, some of the wires. That's not doing anything. And so I turn it around, and I'm looking at it, and there is a lot of words that I don't understand and a lot of numbers that I don't understand. But I figure...
You know, if I just start unplugging things and plugging them right back in, that will fix it. Yeah. Yeah. Blow on the end of it. Yeah. Because clearly, clearly, yeah, part of the problem a lot of times I'm figuring is, is that they need to be unplugged and replugged. Yeah. For sure. Some sort of connection. You got to look at the end of it, too. Make sure. You got to look at it. Well, I have to make sure that there's not like, you know. oil on it. Gook on it. Gook. Yeah. There could be gook. You have gook remover. I've got gook remover. It's my shirt. My shirt. And so I tried all of that and then put it back in place and realized, oh, it's not turned on. It isn't turned on. You're in that problem a lot. And boom goes the dynamite. All right, thanks. So I... Rebecca's a big problem too, Mike. Yeah, how many times your wife said that, Mikey? So I realize it's not, it's not.
I didn't turn the thing on. So I go to turn it on and it doesn't turn on. It doesn't turn on. All those wires you messed with. All the wires I messed with. And so now it doesn't turn on. And so we have people coming over last night. Rebecca says, well, can you put some music on? It's a reasonable request. Sure. So I turn on the music. It sounds like this. And she said, what did you do? Good question. Right. And I said, I don't know. It's a good question. I said, you got any ideas? She said, no. So called Ian. Ian's going to come over, take a look at it.
Hopefully we'll get that all dialed in. You got to know your strengths and weaknesses. You really do. You know, you got to know better than that. So, you ever hear, you know, when you hear screeching tires and you know that the next sound you're going to hear is crunch, it's the worst, right? Imagine you're doing a live news cut and it happens. Because that's exactly what happened. We have audio of it. We'll do it next. Make some noise with our live studio audience. This is what they do. Number one. Text them at 949mikey at gmail.com. If we have any children, please step out. Or call Mikey now. Are you trying to make this sound bad? Because it sounds great. 570-1949. More coming up on FM 94.9. Cox High Speed Internet is way more than just an internet service. With downloads up to 66 times the speed of DSL, Cox High Speed Internet is an instant rock concert. It's an online gamer's winning strategy for saving the day faster. With Media Store and Share, Cox High Speed Internet is the vault that keeps your files safe. And with the free Cox Security Suite powered by McAfee, it's your personal security guard. Plus, when you add Cox Advanced TV with HBO Go, Epix, and Viewtopia online,
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Your car takes care of you. Take care of it. Don't use low-quality gasoline that can leave crud in the engine. Use the gas that cleans. Chevron with Tecron. Care for your car. Clean up on aisle me. At Vons, you can count on low prices. With amazing Vons Club specials and everyday low prices, you can get what you want, when you want it, at the price you need. That's their promise. That's ingredients for life. Vons. Traffic is brought to you by Allstate. Full service insurance at self-service prices. Your local Allstate agent makes it easy to get the protection you need and save money too. Are you in good hands? Looks like they've called for the paramedics. In Rainbow, 15 southbound after Highway 76, one car flipped over. Another car faces the wrong way in the fast lane. A couple other cars involved. So possible injuries here and delays as well. British Airways now flies nonstop to London from San Diego, which means you'll spend more time in London, less time waiting to get there. For schedules and fares, visit BA.com. I'm Judy Gale, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show. My team kicks ass. With Mikey. Cupcakes are so great. They are. They're just fat.
Lauren. If I had a hot tub, I'd be in there nude. Hot tub, nude, nude, nude, nude, nude. Hot tub, nude. Woods. I might have farted when I was thrusting. Sienna. You know, I like myself a glass of wine at night. And Jay. I don't like it when a spoon or a fork pitches with the one on my back teeth. On FM 94.9. La, la, la, la, la, wait till I get my money right. Let's hear it from our live studio audience this morning. So pick a scene coming up at 8 o'clock, which is today the scene is going to be the Animal Cracker scene from Armageddon. Now, if you're not familiar with the scene, it's the scene where Ben Affleck... And Liv Tyler, they're very much in love. And Liv and he are laying on a picnic blanket. Yeah, a little set up outside. And Aerosmith, don't want to miss a thing, is playing. And he takes a little animal cracker and he lovingly and very playfully runs the animal cracker up.
Her belly. Yeah. And tells her about how much he loves her and all that type of thing. Now, today, Liv Tyler's role of Grace will be played by Woods. The same bosom as... Right. Bigger, actually. Oh, boy. Bigger, actually. And the custom fit in my bra. And... Which he will be wearing as well. Yes, true. He'll be in a bra and a dress. And... Jay will be playing the role of Ben Affleck, who at one point during the scene has to do an Australian accent. Yes! Which is the best part of this whole thing? Oh, yeah. Whatever you think you know about this man is a revelerant. What was that, Jay? What was it? Whatever you think you know about this man is a revelerant. Is that a word? Is that a real word? Jay? Yeah, Jay at times will have some problems with it. Whatever you think you know about this man is a revelerant. Okay. Word of the day is Chinchilla. If you wanted to go to Indie Jam and you were not able to get tickets because they are sold out, don't worry. Word of the day is Chinchilla. When you hear me say that between 9 and 10, caller 9, a pair of tickets to go to Indie Jam. So you've all heard that sound of screeching tires, which is terrible when you hear it. And sometimes it happens while you're actually doing a report.
You'll be in the middle of it and you get a little scared. Now, Stefanauer's initial charge back in 2005 was for marijuana possession. His current charges are much more serious. He's facing counts for assault on a law enforcement officer, leaving the scene of an accident and resisting arrest. He's now being held at the Jefferson County Jail. $1 million cash-only bond, and that was a little fender bender right behind us, but nothing too serious. We'll send it back to you. I want to go back to a live picture outside Barnes-Jewish Hospital where News Channel 5's Ann Rudman was doing a report at the top of the program, and as she was doing the live report, you heard a car accident in the background. Now, she did mention it was a minor fender bender. This is a live picture of that minor. Fender Bender, although it did sound like it was something far more serious behind Ann Rubin, but apparently everybody is okay. And it startled everyone, including us here in the studio. So I can only imagine how Ann felt standing on the sidewalk. That's good reporting. It startled everyone, including us here in the studio. Back to you, Dan.
That's the thing, L.O.B. You know, I was thinking about it and I said, what is it about our human nature that when something extraordinary happens and it scares us, we make sounds that we don't normally make? Now, what I mean by that is that for us to go, oh, is really normal. Yeah. But some of us will go. Now, that was an actual piece of audio of Lauren being scared and screaming. She got really... That was... We had... It's ridiculous. We had Jay in this elaborate costume. And Lauren... Oh, my God. Yeah, Lauren walked out of the bathroom and he scared her. And she did that.
In our hallway. I heard that scream through, no kidding, soundproof walls in a studio. I'm not kidding you. Now, here's the thing with that. That, I think, is a predictable. That's what you would expect. But what I enjoy is the occasional doink for no apparent reason. Now, Stefanauer's initial charge back in 2005 was for marijuana possession. His current charges are much more serious. He's facing counts for assault on a law enforcement officer, leaving the scene of an accident and resisting arrest. He's now being held at the Jefferson County Jail. $1 million cash-only bond. And that was a little fender. Recovered pretty well. She did. Went right back into her bed. She did great. Jay's recap, and I'll just read directly from the recap, okay? Uh-oh. I've been drinking. That's incredible. No, Jay, you didn't write anything weird. Okay, good. You didn't write anything weird. Getting ready for the big race this weekend. Oh, my God. Now, what race is it, Jay? It's the 12 Hours of Temecula. Okay, 12 hours. You ride a bike for 12 hours, right? You ride a bike.
I'm actually on a team, so it's lucky I only have to ride like an hour every three hours. Okay. Getting ready for the big race this weekend, exclamation point. I'm not sure that I've trained enough to make a good showing, but now I have no choice. Two weekends of camping in a row is pretty badass. Looks like two nights of campfires, cold beers, and sore legs. Then on Sunday afternoon, I'll head out to Independence Jam, another great weekend here in San Diego, exclamation point. Do you know how hard it is sometimes just physically tiring to be perfect? Do you know how hard that can be? Oh, boy. I mean, sometimes it wears you out. It's exhausting is what it is. It's not the workout that tires me. It's just being perfect. It's just being perfect. Sometimes my wife Kim will walk in.
And after she, you know, says hello to your lordship, she says, how come you look so tired? And I go, babe, just all the perfectness has just worn me out today. And some days are better than others, I'll be honest with you. Some days I can handle the perfectness, but some days the weight of the perfectness is too much for one man to handle. So I ask you, dear diary, does that make me not perfect? I don't know. You know, if it does, diary, at least it means I have a flaw. One. There it is. Which, if I can admit to it, I guess brings me back to perfect. All roads lead to perfect. Good night, everyone. So, this is good. Now, this will tell you a lot about our girl Lauren O'Brien. She did something bizarre yesterday, even for her. Oh, gosh, I'm getting hot. Oh, yeah, you are. Why does it sound so creepy when he says it? It just sounds so creepy. Oh, yeah, you are. Oh, yeah, you are. She found a dress that she absolutely loved. There was one problem. There was only one left, okay? So she's at this store, and the one that was left was a size too small for her.
So she thought, well, I'll try it anyway. So she got into the dressing room and she couldn't get the zipper to go all the way up. But she was convinced that there was enough room left in the dress for it to fit, you know, anyway. She just needed to finesse it a little bit. I know that feeling. Yeah. She was sure that if she had somebody there to help her and zip this sucker up, they'd fit perfectly. So she purposefully... bought a dress that does not fit her. She's terrified of what's going to happen if she gets someone to try to help her zip it up and it still won't fit because she's not sure that she'd return it for that reason because then she'd have to say to them, you know, I bought this too small thinking I could fit into it and I couldn't. So I'm bringing it back. She's afraid of that. So she might just go. On a diet, she says. She might go on a diet. If it won't tip up. It's not your size. She says, you ever just a wicked stepsister trying to squeeze your fat butt into a Cinderella dress? Every morning, pal. Yeah, every day. Every morning. Every single day.
I mean, it's not even funny to me because I go through it. We're like, oh, that's Tuesday. But you guys don't have what girls like. Don't we? Don't we? You can't get your hands back there. At least you get it from the start. Yeah. You do the thing where you make your body as straight as it can go. And then I put a belt on. What's that like? For sure. Yeah, Jay's like, I don't understand. I understand what you're saying. That must be a girl thing. I don't know. I've never known that. All my clothes fit perfectly. Y'all know I can wear Jasper shorts? He's an eight-year-old. Yeah, an eight-year-old. I can wear his shorts if I want to. Yeah. Or I can wear his toddler stuff. This is Osh-Kosh-Bagosh on it right now. Yeah, they're overall. So what? They're Jaspers. Yeah. I wear Jaspers hand-me-downs. Sure. Not going to waste them. What are we going to do? Want me to waste? Hey, listen. This is from the Baby Gap. I can tell, Jay. These shorts are from the Baby Gap. But they're cool. He really did wear Jasper's shirt one day. He did. I'll tell you what, though. Here's the thing with Jay. Jay is one of the most gentle creatures there is. He really, truly is. He's one of the most gentle creatures there is. I think of him as a badger. A badger has no natural enemies.
That's kind of Jay. He doesn't have any natural enemies. He's the sweetest guy. He's always very affable. It doesn't matter what the situation is. He's got a positive attitude. Yes. Don't cross him. Do not. Oh, no. Don't cross him. No. This morning... Pulling the curtain right back. Pulling the curtain back. Oh, wow. This morning I said to Woods, Hey, do you have a... do we have any empty sleeves for a CD? I'm making a blank CD. And Wood says, I'm sure we do. So he goes and looks around. Well, he finds one on Jay's desk. And I said, yeah. He says, Wood says, I don't know what this is, but I'm sure we can find another sleeve later. I said, perfect. I'll take it. Happy birthday. Weird. He's losing his mind. I know. So he brings the sleeve to me. And then when Jay comes in later, I say to Jay, hey, do we have any sleeves for CDs? And Jay goes, oh, yeah, I got one right here on my desk. And he goes over and he goes, where the hell is my... Has anybody seen the... Crash! Wants to blame his underling right away. Because I know...
My family on the show. Yeah, my family would never do that to me. It'd have to be a criminal like Chris. Rapist. That's right. You're a criminal. He's probably the geezer bandit, Mike. Absolutely. So how did it happen that we told him? I told him. You said, oh, I figured it out. He goes, where's the sleeve that was on my desk? And I said, I grabbed it for Mike. And dude. He goes, why'd you do that? You would have thought. that I wrecked his car. He was very unhappy. He was mad. With good reason. Yeah. It's a sleeve. He started to do the shirt shimmy. What? Y'all take that off my desk? What? It's uncomfortable. My example was, Mike, you want me to go through your desk and see what I can find in there? And what did I say? I said, no, you're right, Jay. We're wrong. You're good. We're bad. As usual. Yes. Sorry, sorry. I'll kill you. Dude, I'm telling you. He's the most, he's the sweetest guy who would do anything for anybody in this room. Give his shirt off his back, literally. And don't touch his CD sleeve. L.O.B. goes, at home, when your kids mess up, how did you, what did you ask him? I say, do you call them in here and say, get in here. Let me see, hey. Look at this. Look at this. And he goes, of course I do. Did you do this? Did you?
Jasper? Does that seem like the right way to put your toys away? Absolutely. Would a human being, a natural human being, would it ever do that? Jasper, listen. There's a perfect bloodline. And if you keep pulling stunts like this, you're going to mess it up. Don't be different. Be perfect. That's right. Well, I'll tell you what. There are certain things that his kids are going to know. Certain things that dad needs to pass down to the son. All right? Got a few things here. If you're a dad, here's a list that... Jay, did you come up with this or did you find this? It's just about me. All right. Here's some of the things. Don't be afraid to dance. Now, this is interesting. Now, hang on, hang on, hang on. Let's hear me on this. Hang on. Before you... I know. But last... Yesterday, I'm with my mom and dad. And we're listening to some George Jones. Okay? And my mom is just going crazy over this George Jones music. She's loving it. Had she never heard it? No, she says she has. She says that she remembers it. But, you know, mom's got Alzheimer's. She says a lot of stuff. Just brought back some memories, maybe. Yeah. Sometimes she says stuff and, you know, my dad just kind of looks at me like, that's not true. She's just making that up. But sometimes I know that she's telling the truth and that this is a real story.
So we're in the car and I'm playing this. So I'm playing this and she says to my dad, Danny, do you remember when we used to dance to this? And they did. And she says, we want a dance contest. And I'm like, I go, did you just say that you want a dance contest? And I look to my dad to give me the no, she's making it up look. And he goes, yeah, we did. And I go, how drunk did you get to win a dance contest? And he looked me straight in the face and he goes, pretty freaking drunk. But they did. And apparently dad was a really good dancer. And I asked him, how did you get to how did because I thought to myself, you know, I want to know how to do that. And did you like?
Because, I mean, what was he going to do? Go take a lesson? I said, how did you learn how to dance? He said, I used to go to this place in Gilroy where we grew up. He said, I used to go to this place in Gilroy. And in Spanish, they called the place the armpit. And I said, why? He said, because it was full of Mexicans and it stunk like an armpit. I said, all right. My dad's Mexican. I'm Mexican. OK, so I can say this. Sienna got a look on her face like, oh, my gosh, that's so racist. It's not. It's not. He's Mexican. We're allowed to say it. It's your race. It's my race. I can say it. I can make fun of fat people. Yeah. Exactly. Sienna, if you said it was called the armpit because there was a bunch of stinky Mexicans in there, you'd be fired tomorrow. Yeah. That's true. Tomorrow. I'm not going to say that. I would never. I know. You would never say that. I can say it. And my dad can say it because he's a... Full-blooded Mexican. He actually knows how to speak Spanish. And he said it in Spanish. Does anybody here know how to speak Spanish, knows how to say armpit in Spanish? There's not one Spanish speaking. We're in San Diego. We have a sample of 30 people. There's not one Spanish speaking. Anyway, it was called the armpit. And so dad said he'd get all nice and, you know, lubed up on the alcohol, go down there, and he'd learn how to dance that way. Nice. Now, Woodsy. Yeah. Women really like.
to dance i don't know why guys are not like this okay but women love to dance it's something they just love they want to dance so we don't know why we just want to dance let's go out tonight if they have a bunch of girls they'll say to the girls oh my gosh let's go dance And all they want to do is go have a few drinks with their girls, and they want to get out on the dance floor, and they want to dance. Guys do not call each other up and go, bro. Hey, dude. What's up, dude? What's up, bro? What's up? Hey, you're free tonight, right? Yeah. Hey, man, let's call all the boys, bro. Let's just go dance. You want to go dance tonight? Yeah, I want to dance, bro. Let's go. You want to just dance? Yeah, absolutely. That's all I want to do, though. I just want to dance. We'll get a couple drinks and dance. Yeah, but I just want to dance. I don't want to take anybody home. No, I just want to dance. In fact, I'll make sure that nobody takes you home. I'll cover so nobody takes you home, and we'll just dance, bro. Let's do it. He is a good friend and a lover. Now, women will say those words. They'll go,
I'll make sure that nobody messes with you and we'll go down. It's usually the chubby friend that says that. The mother hen chubby friend that you have to get real drunk, get her a sandwich or a hoagie or something, tie her over so that you can try to get her friend home. Babe, listen, I'll get you a slice of pizza. Just zip your lip, please. Just for a second. You guys will make a cute couple. You're a monster. You're taking a lot of liberties in making fun of fat people. Yeah. Hey, excuse me. Excuse me, L.O.B. Yes. L.O.B. just said that and at the same time in her head went, oh, by the way, I know who my fat friend is. That's not true. My mother hen. A hundred. Every group has one. They all do. And boy. You got to get through that one real quick if you want any kind of action. She's busy. She's not busy. She's coming home with me. She's busy. Here's $7. Really? Subway next door. Really? Make that right for yourself. Stop. You're awful. Oh, my God. He's terrible. Go make that right for yourself. Treat yourself. You probably hooked up with that friend many times. I have jumped on a grenade once or twice in my day. Stop it. Taking one for the team. Is that what you call it?
That's the Jersey Shore. No, we were calling that long before the situation was calling it the grenade. Jumping on a grenade. It's old. Take one for a friend. Take one for your boy. Run interference is another one we used to use. Hogging. Hogging. Oh, my gosh. Stop it. Oh, this is a good one, Mike. You'll like this one. The slump buster. Oh, my gosh. Call it a slump buster. I don't like it. I don't. You love that. I don't. You love it. No. You have a slump buster t-shirt on. I don't have a t-shirt on that says Slump Buster. It says, who are you going to call? And then on the back it says Slump Buster. All right, here's another thing that you need to know if you're a dad teaching his son. Own a roll of duct tape. Own a roll of duct tape. Why? Because it does everything. You put it under your car seat. You keep one handy everywhere. You have one in the bedroom, in the bathroom, in the kitchen. It's a scientific miracle. In the bedroom. Hello. Hello. Mike. Don't worry, Mike. I'm talking about man and wife so you don't go get all creeped out. Don't want you throwing a Bible at me or anything. It's a scientific miracle. It's on par with penicillin and the microwave oven. It's true. It's great. You got to have it. The other thing that every guy should teach his son.
Drink liquor straight up, Jay says. It's hard to do. What? Hard to do. Slowly. Trying to think of a liquor, even back in the day when I drank, the only liquor that I could drink straight up was vodka. Oh. But it had to be cold. It had to be chilled. Ice cold. Now, are you talking shot, or could you pour a glass of cold vodka and drink it out of the glass? Well, the only way I would feel civilized is to put it in a martini glass. Ice cold in a martini glass, because that's a martini. That's a martini, yeah. That's a martini. A martini is just gin or vodka. Ice cold and a martini glass. Not the manliest looking glass to hold. That's true. But there's nothing. But if it's a martini, then 007 did it. There's nothing more manly than a guy walking up to the bar and going, give me a whiskey. And they're like, how do you want it? He's like, neat. Just out of the bottle. How do you want it? And then what? Neat. Neat? Neat. That's just straight up. I hadn't. I never heard that before. Yeah, whiskey neat. You're a hard ass if you do that. Okay, well, there's more that we're going to tell you that you need to do and teach.
By the way, lesson number eight, the drink liquor straight, probably won't be passing that along to Luke and Ryan and Jake. Luke will teach Ryan and Jake. He already has, probably. Anyway, make some noise in the studio. We've got a live studio audience. And when we come back, we're going to play you the audio of a reporter in New York that got in trouble because she wanted to go see... Anthony Wiener. Wiener time. Anthony's Wiener? Who's Anthony? Wiener time. Now, here's what's incredible. Woods was the first person to react to that with a laugh, okay? And he's a 35-year-old man, all right? He's a 35-year-old adult man, all right? I am a 41-year-old adult man. The first time I heard about this story, I laughed out loud, okay? Which just proves that we're all...
grown-up little kids. Yes. So we will be right back. Play that audio. Let's make some noise in the studio. Live studio audience here today. Sienna, what's going on in the news? Pretty crazy story out of Yuma, Arizona. Yesterday, a 73-year-old man killed five people just before killing himself. His name was Kerry Hal Dias. And police believe he was targeting. It was a targeted murder. He actually killed the attorney who represented his ex-wife in their divorce. He was one of the men that was killed. So we'll be hearing more details about that. Also, five local hospitals have been cited for serious errors.
Oh, a total of over $300,000 in fines. The hospitals are Palomar Medical Center in Escondido, Palmarado Hospital in Poway, and Scripps Memorial Hospital in La Jolla. All three of those were each fined $75,000 for penalties like leaving a retractor inside one patient, a 28-inch guide wire inside of another surgery, giving two deadly drug overdoses, and leaving a patient unattended who then fell and died from a fractured skull. Pretty serious injuries. Also, Scripps Memorial Hospital in Encinitas was fined. My wife, when she had the twins, Ryan was a natural birth and then Luke was cesarean. And when she woke up in the recovery room, I'm there with her. And they say, we got to take her. I said, why? And they said, because we have to do an x-ray. And I said, why? And they said, we may have left a sponge in her belly. They didn't leave a sponge in her belly, but they thought, which is a good idea. I mean, if you do leave a sponge in someone, my recommendation is to remove it before letting the person go home. Maybe just have a checklist of what goes in and what goes out. That's a good idea, too. I have a to-do list. Yeah, all of us have a to-do list. And so maybe one of the things is you go, oh, did we get the sponge out?
Go back to the basics. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Sports is brought to us today by our friends at Frank's Red Hot. Frank's Red Hot. Yeah. Well, it was a pretty embarrassing night at Petco Park last night. The Padres dropped a game 7-4 to the Astros. Made three errors. Very sloppy. Pitching and defense was supposed to carry this team, and it's just not happening right now. They dropped to 9-21 at home. That's 9-21. They're batting. They're batting. $1.99 at home. Perfect. It's not good. Maybe move the walls in. Move the fences in. Forget about pitching from now on. And also, Shaquille O'Neal told you yesterday he is retiring from the National Basketball Association. And they are going to retire his jersey in L.A. where he started his championship runs with Kobe. And this was his response to when he found out how that was going to go. Cut to. And welcome. Nope. Mavericks. Two. That's all I got, buddy. Really? I don't have a cut, too. Jay. It's not my fault. Hey, listen. Jay. Maybe you loaded in there, dum-dum. It was in there. Basically, what he said was...
Hey, thanks to the Buss family. You guys are going to make me cry. I'm so honored that this happened, so feast on that. Grubby's, by the way, is our food provider today, Grubby's Diner. Thank you very much to Grubby's Diner. They're going to be bringing in some food for all of the M1s that are hanging out in here today. Also a big sponsor of Independence Jam, and today they're doing a random act of kindness at Grubby's Diner. from noon to 1, and they're giving away tickets to Independence Jam, which is sold out, so you might want to get down there and check that out. It's 1034 South Coast Highway, Oceanside, and you can also find them online, eatgrubbies.com. All right, so I was in the middle of, don't worry, by the way, we still have not done Pick a Scene. That's at 8, where Woods and Jay will be reenacting the scene, the Animal Cracker scene from Armageddon. We don't have to do it today if you want to. If we have other stuff that's more important. No, we're good. We have plenty of time. Are you sure? Yeah, we'll do it at 8. We're good to go. I haven't said the word of the day yet either. Chinchilla is the word. Say it between now and 10. Caller 9 gets tickets to sold out Independence Jam. Jay, where did this, honestly, where did the list come from of the 10 things dads should teach their sons? We just found it online. All right. So they.
They.com. They say this. Now, I say they say this because as I'm looking at the rest of the list, I'm saying to myself, some of this crap I would never teach to my kid. Now, this one isn't bad. Silence is golden. I do believe this. A lot of guys talk way too much. All right. So I do think it's a good idea to teach your kid when to shut up. That's a good idea. Everybody should have that virtue. And it will help you in a lot of situations. Sometimes you get yourself in trouble by running mouth. Now, this next one, I fundamentally disagree with. They recommend that you teach your son, if you're a dad, to never get mad, get even. Which is the stupidest thing you could possibly do. Woods is shaking his head no. What's your take, Woods? I think that's pretty lame, dude. I really do. I was being sarcastic. teach your kid to rise above situations like that. Getting even never really works. And Woods does say that. Woods says, rise above. And I agree with that statement. And you say it a lot. And I believe in that. Says, if you're stabbed in the back, laid off, or screwed over, never let them see you get angry, shake hands and smile. And I did that at my last job. Because I was unceremoniously let go.
And, you know, escorted to my office to pack up and get the hell out. Yeah. You know, and I was, you know, it was cool. All right. The next one they said, this is, again, dad's things that we should teach to our kid. Always buy a laid off friend a beer. That's not so bad, right? Absolutely. Why not? That's a great one. Your pal gets canned. You buy him a beer. A beer. A beer. A beer. I ain't buying some SOB that without a job, more than one beer. I guarantee you, it'd be a white can with black lettering that says beer. Or buy a six-pack PBR, invite him over, give him a paper bag. That's one beer. That's right. One beer. Ain't it? Lesson number four, to teach your kid, your son, is know how to make scrambled eggs. Yeah. Yes. For the ladies. For the ladies, it says, sure. It does. It's been the night. Oh, wow. Here you go. Or, you know, that you're dating. That you're married to. Yeah, that you're married to. And that aren't spending the night. That you invite over for breakfast after you've already said goodnight and gone to your separate quarters. Gone your separate ways. Yes, that's what I meant. That's what I meant. Now, most dudes, I believe, cook scrambled eggs wrong. Weird. Yeah. If the scrambled eggs are finished and they have brown on them because you've overcooked them. Yeah, for sure. It should be fluffy.
They should be fluffy. A little milk. A little milk. Whisked. A little milk whisked. Okay. But here's the important thing to know about scrambled eggs. Low, low, low temperature. Yes. Very low temperature. And it takes a while. Yeah. It should not be done right away. And when you serve it, it should almost be a little bit damp. I purposely don't use the word moist because people hate the word moist. A lot of people have a hard time with the word moist. I don't. Mike. Especially if you go like this first. That was filthy. Stop. Please. Oh, stop. Stop. Number one pet peeve. You hate that word, right? No, not moist. She hates that. Don't do it. The separation of the lips. Oh, you know what I call that? What? I call that meah. Yeah, exactly what it is. Yeah, it's that little meah, meah, meah. Another thing that you should teach your son, buy the women in your life flowers. My dad actually taught me that. Yes. Buy the women in your life flowers. It's a great idea. Oh, wow.
You should always buy the women in your life flowers. Every guy. In the studio right now, raise your hand in the studio if you are married or have a girlfriend and you're a guy. Raise your hand in the studio if you're married. You're not a guy. You're a guy. I need guys. All right. There are three. Now, raise your hand if you buy flowers regularly. Don't lie. No hands. Okay, now here's the deal. Here's the deal. No hands. The flower bit gets you a long way. Okay, the flower bit gets you a long way. They really, and by they I mean the ladies, they really like the flowers. Even the ones that say they don't, they like them. Kim don't. She likes them. What do you mean, Jay? She says she's as cheap as I am, I guess, because she says save the money. Because I used to go and get flowers from the flower shop. She'd rather me, if I'm going to get flowers, she wants me from the cheapest place I can find. By the flower shop, he means a field on his way home. That's what he means. Mike's front yard. Why am I going to go to a florist if right after five, there's daisies and wildflowers?
Why would I? Dandelions. Dandelions. Dandelions. Ragweed. Ragweed. I pick the weeds and I'm doing the environment good too. That's right. Again, perfection. I believe that Kim would love a nice bouquet of flowers. They look so pretty in your house. Never let anyone see you punch inanimate objects. What? Of course what? Feast on it. Because you do, right? Yep. You like to punch inanimate objects. I do. What else? What kinds of things do you do that you, even yourself, would say, yeah, it's a little bit childish, but I do it. Dude, I pitch fits, man. Full-on fits. The throwing of stuff. The knocking stuff off. The tipping of stuff. The tipping of stuff. The, you know. throwing papers or throwing objects, hats. The other day when Woodsy and I were having a spirited conversation, this is a big move that he'll do. He has a backpack. He'll put the backpack on and he'll take the straps and if he's really mad, he pulls them down. Tightens it. He tightens them real. He'll grab them and he'll go. It's my version of Jay's shirt shimmy. Yes, the shirt shimmy. Jay grabs his shirt by one corner of the shoulder.
And down by the waist. Opposite hip. Opposite hip. And then he does a shimmy shake back and forth. 45 times a day. At least. At least. It itches your back. He only does it, though, when he's either angry or nervous. Uncomfortable. If Mike says to him in the morning, Jay, if you question him on something, boy, he starts shimming. If I go. Hey, Jay. Do we have that email that we're doing? Oh, boy. Yeah. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. It is so funny. Look in your basket. Look in your basket. Mike, they left a really valuable one off there. What? How to take a girl's bra off. Oh, yeah. I'm sure I'll be teaching Jake, Luke, and Ryan. Hey, I'm being serious. You're going to teach your son how to take off a bra? Spare him the embarrassment, my friend, of the... You're going to teach him how to heat the spoon, too? I mean, why don't you just teach him every... Yeah, because taking a girl's bra off is... All right, that was... Okay, it was a little bit of an exaggeration. You're right. Hyperbole. I don't want him to be embarrassed by that bit because it's a hard bit. Dude, it's a one... It's a real quick lesson, and he'll never forget it. Let his older friend teach him.
Maybe let him figure it out. I'm totally okay with Woods teaching. Oh, it's creepy. That's embarrassing, and guys don't know how to do it, and it's like, what are you doing back there? Just take it. I'll do it. Hey, Mike, not enough guys know how to take a girl's pants off while she's kicking. All right? Noah, Noah. I'm going to teach my son. Just the bra. Just the bra. It's innocent. It's innocent. It's just second base. Everybody does it. Every guy should know how to undo a girl's belt with one hand. Fair statement. I'll even come with him. I'll go to a seventh grade party. I'll say, come here with you. No, that's ridiculous, L.O.B. I'm going to buy a mannequin, all right? I'm going to buy a mannequin of a girl, and I'll show them. I'll put it on me, which will probably scar him for life, and then have him work the... Put it around a pillow. Put it around a pillow. They don't make bras that big. You actually, he's wearing one later. Yes, I am. That's right. Let's play it for the future. So, this happened with Congressman Anthony Weiner. As you know, Anthony Weiner... Stop it. He took photographs of himself with no shirt, wearing nothing but underpants. Yes.
All right. And allegedly these photos were sent to a 22-year-old co-ed in Seattle. Yeah, college student, yeah, in Seattle. So he won't say if he did it or not. What he's been doing is going, well, my account got hacked and I don't know if, you know, we need to conduct a study to find out, you know, what's going on here. Mr. Wiener, are they not, in fact, your pictures? That is yet to be determined. Do you recall Mr. Wiener taking those pictures, Mr. Wiener? Not that I recall. Not that I recall. And you've made the point of saying my name. Mr. Wiener, so you're saying that you've never, Mr. Wiener, taken pictures of that nature, Mr. Wiener? I haven't, and that was three times that you said my name, and I know what you're doing. It's been done since first grade. Really, since any human being knew what a wiener was, I've heard that. Fair enough. And so has my father and his grandfather and his grandfather before him. My entire family has had to deal with that kind of shenanigan. Doesn't make it less funny, Mr. Wiener. I understand that. I understand that. But maybe we all act like adults now, that we're adult people.
Mr. Wiener, do adult people send pictures of themselves shirtless, Mr. Wiener? Yes, adult people. Now you're just splitting hairs, Mr. Wiener. That's true. So here is the woman from Channel 2, a reporter, trying to talk to Mr. Wiener. I'm Marcia Kramer from CBS in New York City, and I was wondering if I could see the congressman. Those few words caused a hullabaloo in Congressman Anthony Wiener's office today. A what? Hullabaloo is a very underused term. For good reason. Well, yeah, it stopped being used in 1912, I think. Yeah, I remember the last guy that said it. That's right. I was there. It was a party. It was a hullabaloo party.
Door slammed. People pretended I wasn't there. Finally, brave secretary David Arnold arrived. And all I really want to know is what he wants to say to his constituents, who are the people back home who have to vote for him. I don't know how you can say that he hasn't said anything to his constituents. He spoke. She's a clown, too. Yes. They're both clowns. All I want to know is what he wants to say to his constituents, you know, about his underwear photo that got sent to a debutante in. Seattle. That's all I want. I want to know what he wants to say. That's it. For nine hours yesterday. True. He did nine hours of answering questions. Well, he didn't really answer any questions, but he did talk about it for nine hours the day before. Is there anything you missed there that he could provide you, you know, today? To anybody in New York. You know, this was sort of a, I'm in the bunker in the Capitol and wouldn't talk to anybody in New York. After I left Wiener's office, his staff called Capitol Police. Let me see some IDs. One cop told me that if I went into Wiener's office and didn't leave, I could be arrested. If you go into any member's office here, if you... The irony there, if you go into any member's office here...
You're asked to leave, and you refuse to leave. You can be placed under arrest. Okay, but I wouldn't refuse to leave. I didn't say you were. I was never asked to leave, but the fact that cops were called is a clear sign that the stress in Wiener's office over the situation is taking its toll. It's so funny. There was headlines in the New York Post, Wiener in a pickle. I love that. It sounds like there's a lot of Wiener dysfunction going on right now, you know? I get. why he's so messed up. He grew up with that name. Yeah. Kind of gets a pass. Just, why don't you just tell people it's pronounced Weiner from a young age? Why don't you just change it to Phillips? Yes. Well, that was the Harry Balls guy. He changed it to Harry Balls. Holy cow. Can't you say that? Let's just say that. Harry Balls. We talked about that story and they said they changed the pronunciation. Well, when we talked about it, you know, we...
We were careful, you know, we were careful in how we talked about it. Were we? As I remember, yeah, I remember saying, I remember calling him Harry Bowles, you know. Harold Bowles. Yes. Yes. Yes. Just go with minor. All right. So text message we got, 570-1949 is the number. Mike, you see what happens when you're trying to be different? Tried to help my friend this morning with a car battery, and I accidentally jacked up her battery. I don't know what happened. It just exploded. Now she wants me to pay for it. Get? Well, what he means by see what happens when you try to be different is that I started a campaign called Be Different. These black wristbands, you go to BeDifferentPack.org, find out more about it. And the idea behind it was that you think of others before you think of yourself. And that you, you know, instead of being a D, be cool, you know, when you're on the freeway. Instead of flipping somebody off, you don't flip them off. And it's a reminder, you know, it's a black wristband. It reminds you it's always there. And you look at it and you go, oh, yeah, you know what? I made a pact with a bunch of people. Maybe I try to do this a little differently. Well, what he did was a cool thing, you know.
try to help her with her car battery it sounds like he didn't know the first thing about uh car batteries or jumping a car and uh now she wants him to pay for it um now what do you do when you're trying to help somebody and you screw up the job i think that there is something to be said for well Why would you try to fix something that you don't know how? Like, for instance, I went behind my receiver yesterday and jiggled wires. It belongs to me. What I wouldn't do, though, is I wouldn't go to my neighbor and say, let me jiggle some wires around. Because I don't know what I'm doing. I might screw the job up. But I want to know, first of all, what the rest of the folks on the Mikey Show think. And we talk about it here in the studio. Take a break. And you call us, 570-1949. I want to hear from M1 Nation and see what you think about that. If you jack something up helping somebody out, do you pay for it? Let's make some noise in the studio here today. Mikey. Seriously, dude? Call Mikey now, 570-1949. And? Text him at 949Mikey at gmail.com. More coming up on FM 94.9.
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And I haven't said it yet. It'll happen between now and 10. Caller 9 gets a pair of tickets to the sold-out Indy Jam. Our phone number here is 570-1949. Eskimo Blue Waters will be in here in just a bit. So we got a text that said, Mike, you see what happens when you're trying to be different? Tried to help my friend this morning with her car battery, and I accidentally jacked up her battery. I don't know what happened. It just exploded. Now she wants me. To pay for it. And he's wondering, well, you know, is that right? Is that wrong? M1PJ from San Diego. Hey, how you doing? What do you think? That's why they were jumping it. So, I mean, why should he have to pick for something that he's not to replace already? It's true. Is it? I've jumped my battery before. I didn't have to replace it. Well, I mean. It was dead. It's usually on the way out.
Is it? I don't know. But doesn't an alternator get it going again? Not always. Not always. Sometimes the sales are going. That's usually why it quits working if you're on the freeway, especially if it goes out like that, which is weird. Question, you guys. Yeah. What if I gave Jay a jump and his battery fried? Think Jay would ask me to pay? Nope. Here's the deal, too. Is it a battery? You don't have to do anything wrong for a battery to explode. It's a dangerous situation in an operation. Jay, you're telling me that if Woods helped you and it blew your battery up, you wouldn't want him to replace it. Really, dude? Really? I would not. Because he was doing me a favor. I would. I absolutely would let you jump my car, but I would do all the work that was required underneath the hood. Now that is my take, by the way. I think that if you mess somebody's battery up and you're helping them out and they're a friend, I don't know that it even matters if they're a stranger. If you've decided that you're going to help them and you mess it up because of your negligence or ineptitude, how do you with good conscience go, all right, see you later. Have fun.
Shouldn't have got your big stupid head in the way anyway. What's he doing under there? So you'd rather me not help at all if there's a chance. So that blows me away. It's like saying sometimes doctors make a mistake as well. But you're not a doctor, stupid. You're just an idiot that didn't know what he was doing. Yeah, and those doctors, in general, they know how to perform surgery. But if they mess up, that's why they have malpractice insurance. Well, people still die, though. When you're underneath the knife. Sure. Now, if a mechanic friend helped me and it blew up, I'd be like, well, it's not on you. You know what you're doing. You know what you're doing. If, you know, Joe Blow on the side of the road helped me and he blew it up, I still wouldn't ask him because I don't know him. But if some clown friend of mine did, I'd be like, really? Well, don't look for any help then for me. Well, what about this? What about this? What about, because in this case, it sounds like he volunteered and he messed it up. What if you ask somebody? And they say, I don't know how to do that. And they're like, well, dude, I need help. If you mess it up then, then you know there's no way in the world that you can expect them to pay. Agreed. But if somebody goes, hey, let me help you out. If you say, let me help you out, I assume you know what you're doing. Otherwise, you wouldn't be asking. I would assume that. M1, Rob from PB. What do you think? Battery terminals could have been loose, and that's why it blew up. Right. But this one time I was helping my friend do his AC.
And I was going to refrigeration school, and the gauges all said put more gas in there, and the compressor blew up. So I felt bad enough to buy him a new compressor, and that was over $500. Oh, wow. That's a lot of dough, bro. He was broke at the time, so what do you do? Leave him stranded with no truck? They really call it refrigeration school? Yeah, pretty much. That's pretty crazy. Thank you for the call. M1STP from La Mesa, are you there? Yes, I am. What's up, guys? Not too much. What happened with you? Well, one of those meetings around town, I quit drinking recently, you know, and met a cute blonde. And she was always telling me how she was in bad times. And the computer didn't work. My buddy could fix it. So we took it out to his house. And it literally locked up and couldn't do anything. So I put it back in my car and I was going to get it back to her. Broken into in a nice part of town I never expected. Jacked. And I offered to do an insurance claim and take care of it all.
She couldn't come up with any receipts or anything, and then she finally, in result, decides that if I just paid her $300 that it would have cost to repair it, that she'd be cool. And it's still going right now. I'm kind of dodging her. I paid her $100, and I just don't know if I feel right. I feel like she probably stole it or something, and I don't know. But, you know, I was trying to help her out in the long run. What do you think of that, Woods? Here's the deal. Let's say, Mike, I had a gig, and I was going to go play an acoustic gig, and I borrowed your Taylor guitar. Somebody breaks into my car, steals your Taylor. I've got to pay for it. I got to. Okay. It's in my possession. It was stolen or, you know, damaged in my possession. I got to pay for it. How about this? How about I say, hey, Woods, I got a broken string on my tailor. Can you help me out? Uh-huh. No. Woods, I got a broken string on my tailor. And you go, oh, I can put one on for you. You've never done it, but you assume how hard can it be. Right. And in the process of doing it, you jack up my guitar. Yeah.
What do you do? I got to pay for the jacked up guitar. You do? I have to. I have to. Yep. I agree. I mean, I absolutely, absolutely have to. Because Jay said, Jay, I thought you said that you wouldn't pay. No, it's a ton different. I mean, you're talking about somebody on the side of the road that is in need of help. So you pull up to it, and I'm telling you that it's just the sparks that can set up the gas from a battery. Mm-hmm. There's gases in a battery, and that's what explodes it. So it could happen anytime. Anytime you jumpstart a car, you don't want to stand right next to the batteries on either car. I've pulled over to help people that are on the side of the road before, and I don't know anything about how to do anything with a car. And I tell them right up front, I say, hey, is there anything I can do? Do you have a cell phone? Have you been able to call anybody? I have AAA. Can I call AAA for you? I've gone that far. But I'm not going to start digging around in their engine. You're not going to jump their battery? No. I don't know how. I don't either. Whoa. I don't either. Whoa. You're surprised by this? Yeah, it's two wires. It's a black and a red. Listen, if she needs help downing a large thing of onion rings, no problem. You're the guy to call. Yeah. I'm the guy to call. If she was on the side of the road and she was like, with this thing of, you know.
Doritos in her hand. She's like, I don't know how to eat these. I could pull over and I could go, excuse me, ma'am, are you having a hard time eating those Doritos? And she's like, yeah, I don't know how to work it out. I could easily teach her how to do that. But jumping a car, no. I don't know how. Agreed. Me neither. 570. I do. Man. I do. I'm a little embarrassed now. Now I'm a little embarrassed. Mike, I'm embarrassed now. Now I'm embarrassed. Change a tire, know how to jump a battery. Just take the clamps and you put them on the battery. Yeah, it's not very difficult, fellas. Excuse. Scary. Excuse. Okay. Red and black. Red's positive, black's negative. There you go. But here's what I don't know. Okay. Okay. Does she try to start a car and then while she's trying to start it, I start mine? Or do I start mine and then? Your car's, okay, you hook the batteries up. Usually I start with negative and then go to positive. And then get away from both. Get away from both. And then you start your car. The car that starts, you start it and rev it a little bit. Don't put it on the battery when your car is on. No. Everything's off. Everything's turned off. I've seen it done many times. Get it started.
Then you rev your engine because it produces more voltage or whatever it is. And then it revs, and then they start their car. And then you go and remove the red. Negative. Don't let them touch. That's the scary part, Mike. Don't let the metal touch. Taking them off when the car's running is the scary part. Oh, gosh. That's the scary part. I pay for AAA, so I'll just do that. Nice beaver. All right. M1 Kevin is a little extreme on this from Oceanside. Go ahead, Kevin. Hey, how's it going, Mikey? Good. I used to do security at a mall, and one of the courtesy services call that we would do is we'd offer jump starts for people who, you know, had their batteries died. We'd have to have them sign a waiver saying, we're on a mechanic. If we screw up your car, hey, you know, we're a security guard. We're not a mechanic. So if you put the positive and negative and screw those up, you can fry the computer in someone's car, and you can seriously jack their car up. So, I mean, if you don't know what you're doing, don't help people out and try to act like MacGyver or something. Can you imagine having to walk around with a bunch of release forms just in case you need to help someone? You need to sign this for me, ma'am. Do you mind signing this? This is going to give you a henna tattoo. Hang on a second. I've got to find the right release form. So this is for if you have a battery. This is fixing a tire.
Having a baby. Okay, so I'm going to help you have this baby. Here's a Heimlich one. Does that help? I don't have a Heimlich. I got a baby. Sign the deliver a baby one, and then I'll just white out, and later I'll put that it was a Heimlich maneuver. They're like, oh! 570-194-9. Let's see. I have a friend of mine that is here. I got two. Friends in the studio today. One of them I haven't asked if I could put her on the radio. Can I put you on the radio? Come on over to the microphone. It's my friend Shannon, who I went to high school with. Oh, boy. I know. Knew each other all through high school. You were actually class president, weren't you? Yeah. You can put those on. I was actually ASB president. ASB. What is that? Yeah, what is that? That's the whole school. The whole school. Whoa. Okay, so it wasn't even the class. It was the whole school, right? Whole school. And if I remember correctly.
You had to, like, campaign. You had to do the whole thing. I think so, yeah. Yeah. And you did that. Yeah, I did. And we lived in the same very small town of Gilroy. And she was very, very popular. And I was... Okay. That's Jay. Not that popular. Yeah, not that popular. You were in the diving team? She was a diver. She was a diver, apparently. Apparently. Apparently. Jay. But... Shannon was the friend that I stayed with when I came to San Diego when I was 19. Is this Eddie Vedder? Yeah. No way. This is a fascinating story. Eddie Vedder lived in the same complex. Came over. That's unbelievable. He gave my husband a tape, whatever the band was. It was Mother Love Bone. Yeah.
And he gave him a tape. Tony still has it, a cassette tape. Wow. How crazy is that? It's called the Mama-san tape. I'm a huge, huge, huge Pearl Jam. Clearly. Yeah, I guess so. That's incredible. And he used to call my house, Eddie, and every time he'd call, I'd be like, oh, my God. Isn't that crazy? You are kidding me. And you told me a story one time, Mike. You were sitting on the couch watching soap operas, and he walked in and was eating beans or something. He came over when we were there. He was eating ravioli out of a can. Out of a can. Yeah. That's freaking. He was friends with your husband? Yeah. Oh, okay. My husband met him at... Grossmont, I think. He heard him singing. He did a show or did something there. He heard him singing and he came home and he said, I'm telling you, this guy's going to be huge. This guy's going to be huge. The tape she's talking about, that band sent it down from Seattle. Eddie listened to it and then wrote the lyrics to Alive, Footsteps, and Once, which all were on the 10 album. That stuff was written at Moonlight Beach. Moonlight Beach, yeah.
That's incredible. But anyway, I just wanted to say hi to Shannon. I'm going to catch up because there's not very many friends that you have that you've known that long. And so it's pretty cool. Do you have any dirt on our little friend here? I don't have dirt, but I do have, and this is just a cool thing, Mike has always wanted to be a DJ, even back when I knew him back then. Very true. And he would make me call in to the show. Was it a real show or a fake show? Fake show. I think fake show, right? Yeah, fake show. So he could do bits on me. Yeah. No way. You didn't call the police? Mm-hmm. That's really cool. Isn't that great? It was really cool. So I'd have to be different people. Do you remember when I got kicked out of the school DJ thing because I said foreskin? You were talking about that the other day. Yeah. Mr. Jones. Mr. Jones. I don't remember that. You don't remember? Mm-mm. Yeah. You're a year younger, so maybe it happened after I left. Probably. It probably did. But I do remember Mr. Jones. Yeah. Counting Crows song. Yes. Good one. Yeah, he didn't... Different. Did not inspire that song, I don't think. And he wasn't... He really didn't have a sense of humor.
about things like that. About foreskin. No. Few school administrators or teachers do, actually, Mike. That's my experience. That's true. That's true. And he was one of those guys that fell into that category. Right. Well, thank you, Shannon. And think about any embarrassing stories. And if you have any, then you can tell us. Please. I'll give it some thought. Any of your girlfriends he might have hit on or tried any moves, anything like that that we can really use and delve into. Any tripping or falling stories? Yes. All very good. She has something. She knows something. She's probably saving something. She's like, I don't want to embarrass him. Well, thank you, Shannon. And then the other person I want to introduce to you is Naomi. Come over, Naomi. To the microphone. Naomi Goodale now used to be Naomi Crespo. She's just making me horny. Oh, wow. That was Jay. That's awesome. And Naomi was actually on The Bachelor. How long ago? Two years. Two years ago. Yeah. And it was when it was Mesnick? Jason Mesnick. Jason Mesnick. Right up to the mic. You got to come right up to the mic. Yeah. So Jason Mesnick. Now you actually, this actually, you got.
After the show was over, you married your high school sweetheart? Is that the deal? A guy that you had an ex-boyfriend. He was an ex-boyfriend. And after the show, you guys got married. But when you were on The Bachelor, how many girls were left when you didn't get... You have to get a rose to stay, right? So how many were left? I was down to the final four. So he met my family. Interesting. Wow. Wow. Wow. So you're down to the final four. Yeah. And it was weird, right? Yeah. Was he a nice guy? Can I take him? Yeah, you can take him off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Headphones can be a little much. Wow. Yeah, he was really nice. I feel like we had more of a friendship connection. Yeah. And going into it, I didn't, I actually wasn't, I didn't watch his season. He was a, you know, if you watch the show, it's like. They recycle a lot of them. The old contestants are the ones who are popular. I think it was the toss-up between him and another guy on his season. And they chose him. There was a delay in actually doing it when I first met the casting people. I didn't know what to expect going into it. I was just like, okay.
I almost didn't go because I knew I wasn't over David. Right. Your husband now. My now husband, yeah. We got married March 19th. Right. He must have been really jealous and stuff when he found out you were going on The Bachelor. I want to vomit. I'd want to vomit. Oh, gosh. He'd throw things at the TV. Oh, wow. Was he psycho watcher of The Bachelor? I would never watch it. I couldn't. I could not watch it. That's punishment. You're punishing yourself. You're like, I have that. L.O.B. would. Every second. She would make herself be miserable. That's great. Every second she would say. Oh my gosh. So he actually saw you kiss another guy on TV. Oh. I couldn't do it. Yeah. But in all fairness to me, we'd been broken up for about three years. Oh, wow. We dated for two. I was 20, I think, when we started dating. We met waiting tables at Claim Jumper and Carlsbad. And so we ended up dating for a couple years. Good breakup. It was kind of let's let each other go, do our own thing, which was good for me. I didn't realize it at the time.
So in that process is when it actually happened. I'd moved to Austin, Texas, and we had stayed friends for the three years. We both weren't over each other. It was an unspoken thing, though. But when I decided to end up doing the show, it was... I told him, okay, I don't think we should talk for a while. I knew in my heart I wasn't over him. I was still trying to like, but I had decided, okay, we're not going to get back together. It's a great way to get a guy back. It's a great way to get a guy to want you back is to go on The Bachelor. Yeah. I mean, it's really kind of the ultimate way. I mean, is there something that you could do that goes beyond, hey, I'm going to be on a national television show, you know, courting with someone. Is there really more that you can do? I mean, because if you don't do that. The other option is that you just date somebody. In which case, no one, I don't have to see it. I don't have to hear promos about it on ABC. I don't, you know, that's the deal. You know, and I also don't have to be stricken with the fact that out of thousands and thousands and thousands of women, I was hot enough and desirable enough of a single person. They wanted me on this show. Oh, yeah. That would.
might make my head do loose. I think adult films would be the only one above that that may get you even worse than that. That would get you. That makes my mouth water. Might not have the same effect of wanting her back. Certainly wanting her back. Maybe. That would be a bummer. Would that not be a bummer? It would be a bummer. But to each their own. So Woods would be, I guess, in the... hotel room getting the pay-per-view and go i gotta have her back i gotta have her back she's that good she should be mine she should be she gotta be mine why didn't i realize when i had when i had it oh my gosh uh so so we're talking to naomi who was on the bachelor so you go on the show and is it true that they do a thing with editing where they edit it in a way to give you a certain personality that you may not even have yes and no i think i For the most part, you are who you are. And I think some people, they get behind a camera and you change. And it is awkward at first. You get there and there's cameras everywhere. It's reality. I try to stay away from the cameras. The first couple of weeks, I had my friends calling me up, where are you? I'm in the back drinking. I was a bartender at the time, so I was like a bartender on the show. I'd be making drinks and hanging out with the staff. But it's awkward. You get past it.
And then it's just like, can you put your finger now on why you made it that long? Like what was it that he just really dug you? Or was it producers going, we need her to stay here. She's great TV. Do you know? Like, can you? Well, it's a natural, you know, you guys know, you're like, you have a show together. You're with each other all the time. So it's a natural, like to build relations with the producers. And then they, I think that they pick who they, who they want to stay there. And I, I do. It's not a for sure thing, but to some degree, you know, it has to be orchestrated. It's not exactly like, you know, you just show up and then whoever he likes. But, you know, he obviously is the one who chooses ultimately. And the connections are, it's bizarre because you're watching all your, you know, you're developing relationships with the girls and you're watching them go on dates. You're supposed to be obsessed with the guy too. This is one thing that kind of drove me a little nuts. Because, you know, we're having normal conversations. They'd walk in. So, how did Jason look today? Didn't he look cute? Gosh, it's weird. Did they ever go, now when you got kicked out and you were in the limo, which is where they filmed you in the limo, did they say, we want you to look emotionally unstable? No, no, no, no. Because, and the only reason I say that. Cry, scream. I did not want to cry either. Looking back on that, I'm like, gosh, you know. But that's what I'm saying. And I was gone for, I don't know.
over a month, so you develop relationships with these producers, and then you're not only saying goodbye to him, to the girls, you're saying goodbye to them. So you're in the limo, and you're, like, having this emotional meltdown when, really, you're not even sure, like, am I in love with him? I don't know. Like, you're led to, it's hard, it's hard to, you know, second weekend, first weekend, they're asking, how does it feel to be falling in love with Jason? Oh, God. Oh, wow. I'm not. Yeah. I am not. Right. Well. You know, it's, it's, it's not scripted, but. I think that they ask questions a certain way to get a certain response. Because I didn't see when you were on, but I've seen it before. And the one thing that I think that everybody really enjoys is the scene in the limo after where the girl is... And so it is. I don't get it. I don't get it. Because every single time, this is why. This is why. This is why. It's always me. And I don't know why it's always me. And he said things that I really believed. When's it my turn?
Always surprised me. Never love again. I swear. And then you see that slowly, because they're usually a little schnockered. Yeah. They're a little schnockered. And so it changes from that total sadness to you see the anger just start to creep in. Just start to creep in. But then by the end of it, it's... I didn't even care. I don't even care. Screw him. You know what? It's his loss. It's his. That's great. I wonder how many relationships. like yours, have happened because of that show. Guys like, all right, all right, all right, all right. Enough of this BS. Start texting her. On my season, quite a few of the girls got back together with their exes. Absolutely. Of course. They're like, all right, let's make this right right now. It's my fault. I screwed up. I screwed up. I'm an idiot. I screwed up. And the girl knows that she's going to get back together with him, but she's like...
Oh, yeah, I made him sweat. Sorry, MTV's on the line. I'm thinking about another. He's on a unicycle juggling with fire. He's like, please, please, anything. Did you make him sweat? I made him sweat a little. Well, I was gone, too, and you can't talk to anybody. You know, you were sequestered. It was during the presidency. I'm like, did Obama win? Like, who won? Right. You know, we were actually on the date in Seattle, so we went the final. I think it was five of us. Right. We're on our way and we're like sneaking to go get magazines in the store just to catch up on our gossip. Right. We knew nothing. So you literally, I couldn't talk to anybody. So when I get off the show and I call him, you know, let's go get lunch. I bet he was losing his mind. We talked for about an hour on the phone. I didn't say anything until, and we're just about to hang up and he's like, wait. Are you married? I'm like, no, I'm not married. First of all, it doesn't happen on the show. You get married. Oh my gosh. And so did you, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. But did you do a thing where you were like, well, I'm not.
Married? Not yet. That's not what they do there. Yeah, I mean, I'm not married. Well, if you're gone that long, they don't know. Even, you know, all my friends and family, they have no idea. They just know I'm still gone, so there's a good chance that, you know, at that point, it's pushing fourth or third. I'd lose my mind. Mikey, a month without talking to her. A month. I would pace for a month. You'd be throwing stuff against the wall. There'd be holes in the wall. Bottles of Jack Daniels laying around. He couldn't watch. It was hard for him to watch. He didn't watch every episode, but I heard from his friends and everything. He'd be throwing things at the TV. Hang on a second. There's some other stuff I really need to know. Let's make some noise in the studio. We'll be back. Let's make some noise with our live studio audience we have in here. In just a moment, we are going to be doing Pick a Scene. And Woods is sitting in front of me right now in a red dress, a black bra, and a long black wig. You just called it a Friday night. Oh, boy. This is going to be great. Yeah, it is. Woods, you have a sticker in your hair.
It's okay. There you go. Sorry. There you go, buddy. Oh, there you go. All right. Oh, my God. You look like the angriest hooker. Yeah. Disgusting. Look how I'm sitting. Yeah. Wow. Ew. Oh, gosh. Purposely didn't shave either. It's filthy. It's so cute. I can't look at it. We'll play the new Coldplay in just a bit, too. 5-7-0. Is that real hair or like chinchilla hair or what is that? I don't know what it is. You have one strand. Can you get it? It's making me insane. I was standing out there and Jay goes, God, look at that fat coming out of the top of that. You are hideous. You know, he's got to get in character. He needs to love you in a minute. Nice beaver. Okay. Sienna, what's going on in the news? Mike, do you have any family in China?
Of course. You know that. Oh, okay. Well, it makes sense because a 17-year-old boy just sold one of his kidneys to buy an iPad 2. Oh, wow. Oh, boy. All right. See what you're encouraging, though? Yeah. He found out that if he sells a kidney, he could get 22,000 yuan, which is... Yen. Yen. $3,400. And so he did. And he traveled to get this surgery. Came home with an iPad 2 and a new iPhone. There you go. Also pretty crazy story. Billy Bob Thornton's daughter. She's an estranged daughter. Amanda Brumfield has just been convicted of aggravated manslaughter. Back in 2008, the death of a one-year-old girl. She was babysitting her friend's daughter and Billy Bob Thornton's daughter. daughter claimed that the little girl tried to climb out of her playpen and hit her head and that's how she was killed. But prosecutors said it was impossible for that.
for that short of a fall to kill. Just an awful story. Woods, what's going on in sports? Tonight, 7.05, the San Diego Padres take on the Houston Astros at Petco Park, which has not been kind of the Padres this year. They are 9-21. I am doing sports in a dress with a bra on and a wig. Also, this is a really cool story. There's a hockey player named Gilbert Brule who was driving with his girlfriend and saw a hitchhiker that looked familiar. Stopped, asked the guy if he needed a ride. It was Bono. What? It was Bono from U2. Oh, wow. They were in Vancouver. They're driving. He goes, that guy looks pretty familiar. Bono was out taking a walk. It started to pour rain. So they pulled over and they said, you're Bono. He goes, yeah, could you give me a ride? Oh, my gosh. Absolutely. Gave him, hooked him up with backstage passes and tickets to the show in Edmonton. Wow. How freaking cool is that? That's awesome. Isn't that awesome? That's great. The moral of that story is hitchhikers, not always bad. Oh, is that the moral, Woods? Pick up a hitchhiker. You never know who it could be. Oh, wow. A serial killer. Yes. M1 Tony from Escondido. What was the word of the day? That is correct. You are going to sold out Indie Jam on Sunday. Congratulations. Hang on the line, please. Naomi is now helping Woods with his hair. Naomi, it's Naomi Gooddale now.
but she used to be Naomi Crespo and was on The Bachelor a couple of years ago. And so, Naomi, you've got to be this close to that microphone. You've got to be really close. All right. So when you made it down to the last four girls, okay? And so when you leave the show, The Bachelor, do you ever talk to the guy again? Through email. I mean, just kind of, we have positive, you know. Yeah. There's always good energy between us and friendship. So he actually ended up... Jason, for my season, ended up marrying the runner-up. There's a lot of drama around that whole thing. You picked Melissa, who I actually got closest with in the house. Everything worked out for the good. She went on to do Dance with the Stars, got married to her ex. Had a baby, too, I think. They just had a baby. And then Molly and Jason end up getting married, and they're happy. Really? Yeah. I mean, I actually had emailed her, and I said, because around the whole drama of the show, naturally I was closest with Melissa, so I kind of took her side, and if there was a side to take. He was at one point the most hated man in America for doing that. Because he picked one girl and then broke up with her and got together with the runner-up. Right.
So around that time, there was just, you know, they did the after the final rose. They had me and a couple other girls come back to kind of give our input on the whole thing. And I had, you know, said some stuff like, yeah, I wanted to jump through the TV and punch them when I saw that happen. You know, this is like my closest friend in the house. And so, but in hindsight, I think what I learned from it is that this is not an ordinary setup here. You know, you're not. And how can you blame somebody? He made a mistake. Yes, that was like on national television that definitely sucked for Melissa at the time. And obviously she quickly healed and rebounded. But you made a mistake. You picked the wrong girl. And obviously this. He and Molly were meant to be together, so I'm happy for them. What's that Chris Harrison guy like? Is he all right? He's actually really cool. It's funny because... He hit on you? No. He's a total family man. He's a host. Although some of the producers do. The producers hit on you? Well, I had an issue with one of them, but it's bound to happen. It's bound to happen. Well, with producers. With producers, yes. That's the way producers are. There's a lot of scandals. Almost like every other season, you hear somebody getting... Really?
There's a lot of girls and a lot of people. There's a lot of alcohol. There's a lot of perfume. It's awkward when you're sitting there and you're being interviewed by a producer. You're on a show to find love. And then they've got you. Doesn't work out with Jason. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Woods. Somebody else in here? Yeah. All right. Naomi, thank you for telling me this story because I love this stuff. It's interesting to me. All right. You smell fantastic, by the way. Well, thank you. Are you ready to do this, Woods? Relative. I mean, ready? I'm prepared. You look hideous. I'm prepared to do it. All right. We're opening the door. And we are going to recreate the scene. And we're filming this so that you can actually watch it. MikeyShow.com and also on Facebook. Have you seen the links that Chris has gone through, our phone screener? He set up lighting so that it looked like a sunset. Oh, my gosh. He brought in lighting. Oh, my gosh. Look at that. It looks great. It's the scene from Armageddon with the animal crackers.
Woods is trying to... There's a plant right now. Woods is trying to... Oh, gosh. Are we getting this all on film? We need to get all this on film. Everybody's breaking out their phones to film. So, did he just say... Yeah, the mic's on. Did you just say, Woods, you're too fat? Oh, this is so... Oh, it's wrong. Wrong. I'm comfortable. So, Woods is wearing a red dress. And he's got a broken ankle, and so he's got his foot in a boot. And this bit is called Pick a Scene. Oh, my God. And so right now they are going to recreate the scene from Armageddon with the Animal Crackers. Jay is the Australian Ben Affleck. And Woods is playing Liv Taylor's role.
Grace. All right, let's go ahead and start the scene, guys. Action. You know what I was thinking? What? An animal cracker. It's not really a cracker. Why? Well, it's sweet, which makes me think cookie. Baby, you have the sweetest pillow talk. Well, you put cheese on it, and that's what makes a cracker a cracker. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You know, I've got the Animal Cracker National Discovery Channel going on here. Right. Look, as a gazelle. It's Australian. As a gazelle, he is on the open plain grazing into the cheetah. Watch as he stalks his prey. He could either go north.
Gross. Gross. To the ample substance provided by the massive peaks. Oh, wow. Or he could go south. Way down south. Tune in tomorrow. Oh, that's the grossest thing I've ever seen in my life. So, do you think that... Do you think that somewhere in the world right now, there are two people doing the exact same thing at this exact same moment? I don't. I don't. I don't. I hope so. Otherwise, what are we trying to say? I don't. Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do that. That's the filthiest, grossest. That's the filthiest, grossest. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. I love it.
Woods, change, please. Oh, Woods. I can't look at that. Woods just hobbled out of here. Woods just hobbled out of here in a dress and a boot. Maybe we never do that again. Jay, you didn't have to take it so far. Another day at the office. How different is this job from your last? Slightly. It's different, right? Woods is sitting in front of me right now with a Yankee cap on backwards and a black bra. Shirt off. With his dress around his waist. Yes. Are you not changing because it's hard to get the dress off? No. Look at the dress. Okay. Okay. This is so awkward. Please change. This is so awkward. He's oddly comfortable. There are people in this studio right now. A photographic device. I'm going to change real quick. Is taking pictures. I hope you never want to run for Senate. He was wearing a 44D in case you're wondering. Double D, I'm sorry. 44DD. Yeah. My goodness gracious. I'm so grossed out. I can't imagine why. The belly kiss really got me. I didn't see that. I had already turned away. I couldn't take it.
And Jay really gave himself to the role. That's right, eh? I didn't. Oh, wow. I didn't even know Woods could hear me. I'm really sorry, Woods. You, yes, you were Grace. You were Grace. Graceful. You were Graceful. You were Grace. You took upon the role. That just as easily could have been... me and Sienna, Jay and L.O.B. Oh, yeah. It could have... L.O.B. and I would not be lying in our bras, though. Yeah. No, I know. We wouldn't have signed up for that. No, I know. We probably would have switched the roles. Yeah, that would have been funny. You would wear a bra, Mike? No. So how would we have switched them? I would put a bra over my t-shirt, but I would never expose my fat body. Never. Thank you.
Do you know how many people have written us, by the way, and said that just in their normal conversations during the day now, their spouse will say something and they'll go. That's BFMC. Is that what he did? Is that his bit? Your boyfriend? He also downloaded an app that has a soundboard on it. So in regular conversation, he will play drops. Like what? He'll give me crickets a lot. Crickets is a big player. So you'll say something and all of a sudden he'll give you crickets? Yeah, he boos me too. Oh, wow. That must be nice. You're just sitting at a restaurant with him and he breaks out his soundboard and starts giving you crickets after you say something. If I start talking too much, I get crickets. Oh, wow. Wow. That's pretty awesome. Or the shut up! That's a good one. Woodsy is the greatest, man. Gosh darn, you gave yourself to it. You really did. You really did. Let's see. 2011 Scripps National Spelling Bee, which, by the way, was on ESPN. Not a lot going on in the sports world, I take it. Just struggling for programming? ESPN. Yes. What happened? An eighth grader, Sukanyu. Sukanyu!
It even had the pronunciation on the side, and I'm like, just follow what it's saying. Sukanya from Pennsylvania, Wilkes-Barre. Sukanya Roy, Wilkes-Barre. Maybe I just stopped talking. She became the winner of the 84th Scripps National Spelling Bee this night. Go ahead, Sienna. Tell us what the word was. I hate you. Clearly, I'm not in any spelling bees. I think it's... See my truck. Cuss. Isolate. Isolate. That was the word. Cymatricus. It's cyo... Cyometricus? No, but I'm following the... Oh, okay. Here, let me... Well, let's play the clip. Let's play the clip. Okay. Cymatricus. Oh, Cymatricus. Cymatricus. Could I have the definition, please? Of course you can. Having the hair wavy. As in, there is considerable debate among musicologists about whether there is a causal relationship between Bon Jovi's most awesome tunes and the band's Cymatricus era. Cymatricus? Can I have the language of origin, please? Greek to French and Greek. It's all on the first one. Cymatricus. Am I pronouncing the word correctly? I believe so. Cymatricus. C-Y-M.
O-T-R-I-C-H-O-U-S. What a night, Sakanya. It is my pleasure to declare you champion of the script's national spelling bee. That's amazing. $40,000 in cash. It's pretty good. Kids are ever going to put too much pressure on themselves? Yeah, it definitely is a pressure-filled situation. It's too bad they don't allow anything from the crowd so that people can go, just do it! Say it! Can I have a definition? Country of origin? Can you use it in a sentence? Am I pronouncing it correctly back to you?
the country of origins. It's like Stephen Wright is in a spelling bee. Exactly. Country of origin, please. France. Can I have the definition? The definition is something that is round. Thank you. Can you use it in a sentence? Simantricus is the name of my new restaurant. Why do they call them stairs? You can't stare at them. That doesn't make any sense, Sunyaka. I'm thinking of some new stand-up material that I'm going to use. I can't stare at him. It's a good one. Did you like that one? Not bad. Thank you. Let's see. Okay, so this is a text that we got from M1 John. He wants to know, is men wearing flip-flops...
quote-unquote queer. Now, this is an interesting question because I've never even for a second thought that wearing flip-flops is in any way gender-specific. Woods is wearing a pair of green flip-flops right now. Well, he's not wearing a pair because he's in a... The other one's a boot. Wearing a single. He broke his ankle. Kankle. Oh. It's weird. I'm wearing a single flip-flop, yet I have a double burger in front of me. Oh, wow. There you go. So, can anybody explain that? Like, who... Does it... Is it... It's an unequiv... It's no. No! All men in San Diego wear flip-flops, right? Yes! People that say that are people from, like, Wisconsin or something that are like, real men don't wear flip-flops. Is that the deal? It's gotta be.
Is there any guy that's listening right now that believes that it is gay to wear flip-flops? Now, when I say gay, I don't mean it in a derogatory way. What I mean by that is actually gay. Yeah, he said queer. Yeah, he believes that it would be a gay guy thing. Okay. For instance, not a lot of straight guys will do like... The short shorts and rainbow suspenders and a pair of roller skates. Except Jay. Jay would do that. I can pull it off. Only at Mission Beach. That's a true statement. Not every gay guy would do that, but a gay guy would do that. Not a lot of straight guys would do that. Right. So my question to you is, is there any guy listening that feels that it's a gay thing to do? And by the way, we got the gay memo. Yes. And the gay memo says to say gay. Yes. So is it gay for a guy to wear flip-flops? I never thought so, ever, until that. Yeah. Now I'm questioning my flip-flops. Me too. Great. I don't want to put the wrong message out there. Mike, I guess we got to wear giant Timberlands. Timberlands? Timberlands. 570-1949. Let us know.
570-1949. We'll be back. Make some noise in our live studio audience. Sober Manor. Be a part of the show. 570-1949. Uh, that, that, that. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. Oh, go, go. This is The Mikey Show. You're welcome. On FM 94.9. The president and founder of Mercedes-Benz of Escondido, Angelo DeMonte. You know, we're very proud of being in Escondido. We do a tremendous amount of business. in North County and all of San Diego. We have people drive from all over Southern California also to visit Mercedes-Benz of Escondido. There must be a reason. The reason is the people. We have people that have been with me for over 30 years. That says something in and of itself. We have customers that have been with us for over 30 years, loyal customers. That's why we are an award-winning Mercedes-Benz dealership. Now, couple that with a payment as low as $349 a month for a brand-new Mercedes-Benz, along with a selection of the finest pre-owned Mercedes-Benz that there is in Southern California.
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SD Hydro. Grow your own. It's time to race to the county fair. The San Diego County Fair opens next week, and there are lots of ways to save. Buy your passport to savings book full of discounts, deals, and two-for-ones for just $5 at the fair box office and enter to win a trip to Alberta, Canada. Visit SDFair.com for details. More smiles to the mile at the San Diego County Fair. Presented by Albertson Save-On. Hey, let's face it. You suck at making margaritas. Pick up some Jose Cuervo pre-mixed margaritas. Get out of the kitchen. And back to the party. Traffic is brought to you by Caltrans. Speeding in a highway work zone is deadly. That's why your fines are now up to $1,000 or more plus points on your driving record. Slow for the cone zone. Carlsbad I-5 northbound after Cannon Road. Watch out for some debris in the slow lane.
I-8 in La Mesa eastbound after Severin Drive car hit the center divider also now blocks the fast lane. 42-ounce soft drinks are only 79 cents at McDonald's for a limited time. Choose from a variety of icy cold drinks and now many McDonald's are open 24 hours. Participation varies. I'm Judy Gale, FM 94.9. I knew this was going to be the most difficult part. Now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't pass gas. In front of my wife. Lauren. I wouldn't make my own dress if I knew how to sew. Woods. Do you have a problem with me peeing in my backyard? No. Because that is done at least three times a week. Zienna. Tomorrow's the royal. And Jake. I've had my tips frosted. I believe you. I believe you. FM 94.9. Let's make some noise in our lives. So, uh... I was just handed, from LOB, I was just handed some text messages that we received. Now, I just want to let you know, Jay is our producer, and he will, if we get any good texts, he will gather them for me, and then he'll print them out. These are really good ones. He uses his discretion. He uses his discretion, you know, because I've told him, I said, listen.
In terms of what you give me, just use your best judgment. The good ones. Just give me the good ones. I just want the good stuff, the gold. Right. This text says, Jay, you are hot. How do you stay in such great shape? Stop. Shut up. He made these up. Let me see this. These are real deals. I want nothing to do with that. Jay, you are hot. I know. How do you stay in such great shape? Kim Isbell. I need to get my husband on your program, M1 Robin. Rebecca. Oh, boy. Oh, man. The next text says, Freaking Super Funny J! Exclamation point. You are the best, dot, dot, dot, love you! Exclamation point. Signed, M1 Batgirl. All the women. The next one reads... There's more? The next one reads, J, period.
equals awesome exclamation point so again j period equals awesome exclamation point m1 lady well those are those are fascinating uh you know thought starters yeah yeah real conversation pieces i think they're good ones i mean y'all want to talk about me hey listen when you got it flaunt it so What you're saying, Mike, is I'll take seconds. Nothing you haven't said before. If you know what I mean. And I think you do. Portraitprints.net. What they'll do is they'll take a photograph and then they'll turn it into what looks like an oil painting and they can frame it for you. We got one here in the studio. We got a couple here in the studio. And Jared does it. Amazing work. Amazing high-end gift.
There's a high-end gift that you can give to somebody. If you have a picture that means a lot to you or means a lot to someone, you can have him put that in an oil painting-looking form. Good for Father's Day. Great idea for Father's Day. By the way, tonight's 8 o'clock album, Rush! Garrett! I thought we already did Permanent Waves. It says Rush, Permanent Waves. Yeah, I thought we did Permanent Waves. So good we had to play it twice? Maybe. Maybe I made a mistake. That's all right. Okay. So somebody wanted to know if wearing flip-flops is, quote, queer. Now, we got a memo. You know, if something changes and you say, I never got the memo, we actually got the memo. Yes. We got a memo that told us that the word, you can't say homosexual. Right. The proper terminology is gay? Yes. Okay. Now.
I don't remember queer. What did they say about that? Was that acceptable? Queer is not acceptable. It's not acceptable. What about that show Queer As Folk? Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. Still, I think. I can pull up the memo if you'd like. Tonight's 8 o'clock album is in fact the cult. Yes. I accidentally looked at last week. Electric is the album. So good. Flip Flops. I don't think that that is a... I don't think that's gay. No. M1 Phil from San Marcos. Hey, how's it going? Good. And is there a difference between sandals and flip-flops? I think, you know... Wait, wait, wait, wait. Excuse me. I changed my opinion. This is crazy. It is not gay to wear sandals. Or flip-flops. Unless, of course, they're rainbows. Have you ever worn rainbow candles? No, rainbows are not gay. It's a brand. It's a brand. They're expensive. They're made of bigger color. They're leather. They mold, too. They're not rainbow colored. They're really, really nice. The brand is rainbow. Okay, because I thought you meant that the actual sandals had rainbows on them. Did you hear him try to rip your throat out through the phone for insulting rainbow sandals? No, hang on a second. I thought...
When he said that he wore rainbow sandals, I thought it was sandals that had pictures of little rainbows on them, in which case I would say, gay. Understandable. In which case, all of the village people would call in and say, you're gay. Yeah. You know, but it's a brand. Right. It's a brand. An expensive sandal brand. Why does the price make a difference? Yeah. I didn't spend, I just feel like so. Gay guys can spend money. Yeah, and what's wrong with green? And gay guys can spend money on their sandals, too, so don't try to make it like it's some sort of elitist. Oh, mine are literally green. Yes, they're actually green. They're colored green. They're actually green. They're they. They're Sanuks, so they're green and they're green. Thank you. M1 Domster from Rancho Penasquitos. Good, man. So I've been born and raised in San Diego my whole life, and I've never worn sandals or flip-flops. And it's not because I think it's gay.
It's just because you've got no breakaway speed if something goes down, and you're not going to be... Oh, wow. Easy Batman. Oh, wow. Easy Batman. M1 Batman from now on. Wait a minute. You running relays? What could go wrong? That's a legitimate question, Domster. What could go wrong? Something. Something? Yeah, there's only something. You're not hitching fences and flip-flops. Okay. So you got to wear Crocs, you know, just in case. Oh, exactly. Yeah. What do you wear with shorts? What do I wear with shorts? Chuck Taylors. Yeah, shoes. That's cute. That's cool. Yeah. I don't have problems with Chuck. What? What's wrong with Chuck's? What? Tell me. With shorts. You wear high tops with shorts? No, no. They're not high tops. Oh, the low tops. No socks. Even high tops you can wear with shorts. What? No. Well, I can. I can. They played basketball in them. That's the way they were designed. Yeah, in 1950. Yeah, but I can wear hobbit sandals and get away with it. Mike, I wear corn husks on the bottom of my feet. That's right. It's still sexy. Trust me. They'll still stop me on the beach and be like, where'd you get those corn husks? Make me a pair? Let's say, are those corn husks on your feet? You're just happy to see me. You know what they say about men with big corn husks.
Farmers. That's right. Big ears of corn. Know what I mean? M1 Ross, or excuse me, M1 Ross from Carlsbad. Go ahead. He's kind of a skater, hipster guy, and he always gives me cross-eyed looks. I mean, there's, again, like the previous one goes down, I need to run away from something or rock out or something. Right, because, yeah, I mean, you could rob a bank accidentally. You could accidentally rob a bank, and you need to run away. See, I know exactly what they're saying. I make my family, if we go to a concert, we have to wear shoes, closed-toed shoes. Or if we fly in a plane, I make them wear closed-toed shoes. They can't wear flip-flops. What? Steel-toe, right? No, because if something happened and the plane was to crash and you had to make your way down the aisle quickly, yeah, and there's fire, there's broken glass, there's shards of metal. Broken glass? Yeah. There's windows, there's all kinds of stuff that would be all over the place. Plastic. I don't think they are made out of plastic. Plastic.
I think just the inside part of this. I purposely wear foot flops on a plane. Me too. It's easy to travel. Read what they say the airlines tell you to wear. Well, they say a lot. Yeah, well, I wouldn't have listened to them. Everyone, Rick from Escondido. He's on his period. Oh, wow. He is. No, he's not. He is. Go ahead, Rick. I'll say, this is a fine line. As long as you're not wearing buckle straps, Velcro, or your big toe is not covered in a strap, They're pretty good. Those are sandals. Those are filthy. Is there anything, and excuse me if anybody's listening and wearing these right now, I'm sorry. I'm not. I'm not sorry. But is there anything worse than guy sandals with buckles on them? Velcro. Velcro is worse. Yes, there is something worse. The one with just the big toe goes in, and it's leather. Julius Caesar, you wear this for, dude. It punches pilot. Seriously. Have you seen those? Yeah. Hideous. Yeah. Hideous. I see them like... You got the woman repellers on. M1 All Caps from IB. How are you? What's going on? Flip flops. Although I think there's a difference. The sandals and flip flops are mostly the same thing. It's just that flip flops, it's a gayer way to say sandals. That is true. No. Not true.
Flip-flop goes in between your big toe and the second one. That's what makes a flip-flop. Thongs. See, you don't think that you can have sandals? You don't think you have sandals with that same deal? I do. They're leather. Yeah. They're leather. What? Sandals. If it goes in there, it's a flip-flop. Oh, yeah, if they're flip-flops. Because it does go in between the big toe. If it's a thong in between your big toe and the next one, it's a flip-flop. Yes. Because it flips and it flops when you walk. Let me ask you this, L.O.B. You gave me these sinuks, okay? Now, they make sinuks that don't have the end part, okay? They make sinuks that don't have this. Yeah. All right? And they're like that. Are those cool? I think so. I love those. They're almost like slippers. I love them. They're like slippers. They're like slippers. I wouldn't wear those outside. I wouldn't either. What? Oh, come on. I wouldn't either. Oh, come on. They're slippers. They're slippers, dude. No, they're not. Yes, they are. They're easy to put on and easy to take off. It depends on where you wear them. So are these. Don't wear them outside. Yeah. Sienna. What? What do you think is green? I don't like them. Nobody does. Why? Because they're green, right? They're like carpet. They're green. Astro turf. They're made out of astro turf. Is that true? Yeah. Yeah. May I see them? Yeah, for sure. Ew. Ew. Have you seen his feet? I like Woods' regular reefs that he wears. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You won't give them back. That's right. You know what I don't understand about this?
This would be like shoes that were made of wet morning dew. I don't want to put my feet on that. Do you know how comfortable that is? They are beyond comfortable. I wouldn't think that putting my feet on AstroTurf would be... Put your finger down like that. Push them on that. I'm good. Then you're judging without trying. I'm not judging. It feels nice. Oh, they're so comfortable. Mine are made out of a yoga mat. And I have other ones made of a beer koozie. Weird. Reusable. Can I show you a picture of the world's worst sandals that I see tourists wear all the time? Oh, my God. And they are called sandals. They're like the shoe with leather straps everywhere. And it's like a shoe, but there's holes in it. So they call them sandals. You know what I'm talking about, right? Hang on a second. Now, describe what the description of those sandals is online.
I just put in leather sandals for men. Describe them. It's like a shoe. You have to put your foot all the way in it. There's a backing and there's sides. They look like they're made out of wicker. But there's slats. But there's little slats of leather all over. They're real big on, I want to say Texas. Turn it around. Turn it around. Yeah, I've seen them in the Midwest. When was the last time you went to Texas? I need to look at them and I'm going to tell you the man that wears them. This man is at the Wild Animal Park. Okay? He is 56 years of age. He has short salt and pepper hair. He is wearing glasses that have gold rims. And he's cool because they're shaped like John Lennon's glasses. Okay? Gold rim. He is wearing a... He is wearing a beige golf shirt and it's tucked in to a pair of docker shorts. Yes, exactly. His belt matches those sandals because it's woven leather that's woven. Yes. And he also has a cell phone holster. Yes. Oh, yeah. With a cell phone in it. 100%. Makes sense. Yeah. Even Jay.
And by the way, I made a mistake. No, I didn't. Did I say docker shorts? Yeah, you did. Yeah, khaki. Yes. Khaki docker shorts. Yeah. That's my dad. He's, it's everyone's dad. Identical. It's everyone's father. Yeah, I love you, dude. And by the way, they know they look sophisticated. Oh, yeah. It went away. It went away. I brought another picture. It went away. Oh, no. I'm going to maybe just put bad sales on my blog. Put them on our Facebook page. Let me see. You got to tip down. Oh, my God, Sienna. They're like Jesus sandals. Yeah. They're crisscrossed. Yeah, leather. Crisscrossed. Now, that dad, again, knows that he is sophisticated. Okay? His wallet is very particular as well. Okay? Is the wallet brown, Woods? Is it brown? It's brown. It's brown. Yeah, 100%. It probably cost a lot. Yes. He's considered getting that same wallet for colleagues. Here's the deal. The brand cost a lot. He got his at Ross. Yes. So it was a knock. It wasn't a knockoff. It was a damage. Last season. He got it at Ross. But when he is in that exact same outfit, in line, at the movie theater, matinee, cheaper. When he takes that wallet out.
He knows he looks sophisticated. He's a hard ass, yeah. Yeah, for sure. Oh, man, the dad look. Gary Michael Woods. Yeah. Now, this same guy in these same sandals is the guy that you hear very angry at his kids at the wild animal park. He's very angry at Thomas. Excuse me. Not Tom. Or Tommy. Not Tommy. His nine-year-old son. Thomas. Thomas Gregory. Only when he's angry. Yeah, middle name. Thomas Gregory. Thomas Gregory. Eat that normal. Eat that normal. Stop eating like that. Don't touch her. Don't touch her.
Wild Animal Park guy. Just furious to be there. Angry Wild Animal Park guy. He doesn't want to be there. He wants to be playing golf, but he just caught a ration of S for his wife for never hanging out. Right. And they are, by the way, they're from Irvine. Oh, yeah. And they're at the Wild Animal Park. And by the way, she chose Wild Animal Park because it meant that he had to drive. She purposefully didn't pick Disneyland, which they also haven't been to in years. She didn't pick Disneyland because that'd be too easy. We're going to Wild Animal Park because we've never been. That's the reason I'm going to give you, because we've never been. But the real reason is, is because you don't spend time with the kids and you're driving to the Wild Animal Park. The whole way there, all he does is yell at Thomas. And listen to AM radio. And listen to AM radio. Sports talk radio. Sports talk radio. Thomas is punching the back of his chair the whole time. Thomas is kicking the back. Kicking the back of his chair. Kicking the back of his chair. Don't kick the back of the chair. I told you don't kick the back of the chair. He's furious. Yeah. He's furious. What's the sister's name, Sienna? I don't know. Jessica. No. No, it's Maisie. I think it's a family name. It's Maisie. Madeline. Maisie or Madeline? It's Maisie.
But her actual name is... Madeline. Madeline. Or Madeline. But he calls her Maisie. They both call her Maisie. None taken. None taken. She has a daughter named Maddie. It's a beautiful name. He's also pretty upset because he's quit smoking again. On his wife's insistence. Again. So he's chewing on a pen the whole way to Wild Animal Park. Stop kicking the back of my chair! He's also mad because his wife put sunblock on his face herself because she insisted, so he had little white smears everywhere. He can smell it. On his pink face. Because he golfs every Saturday and Sunday. Well, his pink face, except for his eyes, which are white. From his golf glasses. Well, they're white.
In like Oakley. Yes. It's white Oakley shaped eyes. Tight fitting around the face. Very tight. Very. With the little koozie. Yeah, the croquis. Right? Oh, yeah. You don't want to lose those. Idiot. Another thing he's got going on today are his buddies from his alma mater are getting together to watch the opening game of his college team. Yeah, of course they are. And he's at Wild Animal Park. Really upset. He's at Wild Animal Park. Now. He has threatened to ground Thomas four times. He's actually grounded Thomas zero times. The reason, he's guilty that he's not hung out with Thomas one time in the last year. One time. So he threatens to ground Thomas four different times. I'm telling you, you do it again, you've grounded. One more time. One more time. The next time you do that, you're grounded and I'm not kidding. An hour later, Thomas does the same thing. I'm not kidding about it. You think I'm kidding? Thomas is thinking, no, I know you're kidding. Marie, tell him I'm not kidding. Tell him I'm not kidding. Marie. Thomas, stop it. Stop it. Oh, God. She's kind of being a B now because he's in a bad mood. Right. He's a kid. This is what kids do. Has she ever said to him?
On this trip to the wild animal park. Oh, fun trip. Oh, my God. Blew my mind. Sure glad you came along. Neil. Neil. Neil. Neil, Marie. Neil. Neil, Marie, Thomas, and Maddie. Amazing. Madeline. Now. Neil. To subtly upset him. The ways that she'll upset him are very subtle. This is one way she'll do it. She goes. We should consider a season pass for here. And he goes, uh-huh. Good thing there's no traffic. No, that's something he would say. He would say that, oh, this is great. We had gotten up and went when I wanted to go, though. We were supposed to leave at 7. But you had to watch SportsCenter. Now aren't you glad we got the minivan? Oh, my God. The minivan.
Think about how this would have been in your Cadillac. He's like, yeah, you know what? I was neutered when we got this minivan. Actually, when I put this ring on is when I got neutered. Oh, wow. Neil. Thanks a lot. Poor Neil. I'm sorry, Neil. I'm going to play some golf. Listen, there's never been a more right name. Neil and Marie. Neil and Marie. We got new movies coming out this weekend. Excuse me, we have a new movie coming out this weekend. And Eskimo Blue Waters is furious and will be coming into the studio next. Let's hear it in our live studio audience. Let's make some noise in here with our live studio audience. Sienna, what's going on in the news? Well, a New York man is claiming that he's entitled to 50% of... Facebook. His name is Paul Siglia, and he claims that he contracted with Mark Zuckerberg in 2003 for 50% of what became Facebook. People ever sue Facebook? I know. Well, Mark Zuckerberg has acknowledged that, yeah, he did sign a contract with this man back in 2003, but he says it was for work he'd done for streetfacts.com, which is a website that posted photos of traffic intersections. Mark, have you done anything that's not shady?
Actually, the thing is, when you're as big as I am, everyone tries to tear you down. Okay. Just kind of like a brick wall, just chip little by little. Yeah, every day it's a nude lawsuit. Yeah, but I'm impenetrable, so I don't really, I'm not really scared. Is that because of the mafia that you have around you? No, it's just my sheer intelligence. Okay, got it. Also, there is a middle school in Rustville, Arkansas, which has some people upset. In their yearbook, they have named the top five worst people of all time. On that list, Adolf Hitler, Osama bin Laden, Charles Manson, George Bush, and Dick Cheney. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. No Saddam Hussein. Oh, my gosh. Wow. Yeah. Wow. Like he's not on that list. Yeah, how come Michael Woods aren't on there yet? Woods, what's going on in sports? Sloppy night last night at Petco Park for the Padres. They lost 7-4 to the Astros. They are now 9-21 at home. They are batting a robust 199 at home as well. Maybe they need a long road trip to get back in the swing of things. They will play tonight against Houston at 7-0-5. And NFL owners and players, along with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, Demora Smith, who's the head of the Players Association, they met with Judge Arthur Boylan yesterday. They will not give any information on how that meeting went.
Wow. Beast. I want to give a big round of applause to Grubby's Diner. Thank you, Grubby's. By the way, Grubby's Diner, in case you don't know, is going to be out at Independence Jam. And they're going to be doing a random act of kindness today from noon to one. They're going to give away tickets to Independence Jam. Independence Jam is sold out. The address. 1034 South Coast Highway in Oceanside. And you can also go to their website, eatgrubbies.com. And great food. And we want to thank them for coming in today. Really, really good stuff. All right. So I told you I was going to do this. And I want to give you this new song from Coldplay. They got a new song called Every Teardrop is a Waterfall. And I'm excited to hear it. And then when we come back after hearing this song, we'll talk to EBW. This is the new one from Coldplay. I think Apple and Noah are going to have any talent. Oh my gosh, man. That's great. Instantly. Yep. Instantly that was great. I like it. I could, yeah, I want to burn that onto a CD. I liked it instantly. Looks like it would be a new Apple commercial song. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. New Coldplay. It's called Every Teardrops a Waterfall. Really, really good. I forgot what we were, oh, a couple things. Yeah, I want to talk about that.
On the Today Show, Today, New Kids and... Backstreet Boys. Backstreet Boys. So now, have they formed a super group? Uh-huh. N-K-O-T-B-2-B. B-S-B. That's a lot of... I wouldn't say super group. Super group would be like Audio Slave, Velvet Revolver, Cream. Right. You know, I wouldn't put them in the same ballpark. So maybe... Those guys. Would they be like a... They'd be like a moderate group. What's less than moderate? A less than group? Adequate. An adequate group. Inadequate. An adequate group. Over the hill. It's weird. They are not performing separately. They perform as one large group. They're going on tour together this summer. They're not boys anymore. Yeah. Backstreet men. It's the Backstreet men. New men on the block.
And it is time for the moment. These folks have been waiting for two concerts for the price of one. Ladies and gentlemen. Who's the audience? Women. Me, basically. And me. So a female between 25 and 35. Yeah, about that. Oh, my God. Very updated sound. Or not. I'm not ready. Oh, my God. I got to go. I got to go. I got to go. I got to go. I got to go. I got to go. Wow. Yeah. Ella B knows it. Oh, my God. They're very in shape. I like the tone of that guy's voice. Mikey. Jordan. You do, too. You just don't want to admit it. B.S. Hey, I don't want... Listen. I like that. Never. Never. Never. Like it. Never.
I don't like the song. I don't like the song. He can sing Led Zeppelin and then I'd be like, wow, it's terrible. Well, Led Zeppelin's not supposed to sound like that. No, no, but I'm saying the song, the tone of his voice is awful. Hideous. Well, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait. It's not awful and hideous. You don't like, it's not your thing. But you don't think to yourself, Woods, you don't go, oh, that's a bad singer, do you? Yeah. Because there are some guys that try that and they sound terrible. Is he on pitch? Yeah, he's on pitch, he's on key, and there's a nice tonality to his voice, but it's not your thing. I like girls a lot. Joey McIntyre. Well, here's the thing. You know, before the groupies were 14. Yeah. You know, and now the groupies are between 25 and 35. Legal now. Oh, wow. He pulled her hair. Yeah. Wow. He walked right. He's walked down. He walked right down the stage and he went up to a fan, grabbed the back of her hair and pulled it back. Now, he'll be getting a sexual assault lawsuit. Yeah. Probably.
Now, he just, for the record, pointed at guys. You and you and... Oh, my God. He's doing the right stuff dance. Now, wait a minute. Now, NKOTB... Awesome. NKOTB has joined the Backstreet Boys. So did they go... Were they talking to the Backstreet Boys and they were like, no, you have it wrong. You have it wrong. You're doing it wrong. Like, when they were showing... Like, because they had to teach the Backstreet Boys... How to do the oh, oh, oh. This is just new kids on stage right now. This is Justin. That was Donnie Wahlberg. It was Mark Wahlberg. I thought they were all together. And they sing together. They're going to come up next. They'll come up next. You don't worry about it. They're coming. They'll come up behind. You're getting way excited. I'm getting ahead of myself. Relax. They're dusting their shoulders off right now. So this is only NKOTB. Now, do you think that as he's doing the dance, Donnie Wahlberg is like, my brother. Yeah.
is a famous actor. And I was in The Sixth Sense and should have been an actor to who? Why am I here? Why am I here? Why did my ex-wife take all my money? All of it. Sienna, for the record, just screamed out. Yeah! I was just going to say, I'm going to try to describe the outfits. Because Michael Jackson would be like, that's weird. Is it like a military style? It's like a stylish pilot's coat or something. It's gay military. Gay military. Gay military. Gay military. I want to beat them with a belt. You're just jealous. I'm not jealous. I promise you I'm not jealous. On my mother, I'm not jealous. I want to take my belt off and run on stage and whip them. You want to see Tony Soprano chasing them off the stage?
And they're running like, come here, Jordan. Come back to you boys. Uh-oh. Here they come. Oh, no. They're getting it. It's about to happen. Some, like, somebody needs some ovation because, well, and I, you know, who am I to talk? Because I don't, you know, I got a shaved head because of the hair loss. Yeah. I don't have a problem with that song. I kind of like that song. Okay, question. All right, that's enough. Thank you. Question, question, question. And I want you to try to be as honest as you can. But what do you think the percentage breakdown, Woods, is men to women at a... Do girls not want their guys to go with them to the concert? No. Right, L.O.B.? You want to go with your girlfriends. Yeah, and I want to go, woohoo! Right. You don't even want... Yeah! Right, Sienna? It's so hot! You don't want Todd to go, right? No.
You want to go with your girlfriend. Shall we go with L.O.B.? Yeah, you want to go with L.O.B. We'll sing. We'll put our arms around each other. Yeah. That's a big player. You want to know something, Woods? As lame as it is, those guys are probably going to be millionaires before August because of the tour. I mean, they'll probably sell out arenas with 26 to 35-year-old women. I know. It's sad. My first ever concert, New Kids on the Block. 20 years ago. I also won a lip-syncing contest doing the right stuff. Look at those guys. Nick Carter from Backstreet Boys looks amazing. Better than he's ever looked. Those are cool chains he's wearing around his neck, too. Don't be jealous. I should have worn a hat, the bald guy. Yeah. Yeah, maybe, you know, or just shave the whole thing. He's got the pencil-thin sideburn bit going. With the horseshoe. The horseshoe. He's got the, yeah. He's got a full cul-de-sac. Costanza. Cul-de-sac. Oh, wow. Hey, listen. We're laughing all the way to the bank, buddy. Who cares? I'm just saying. It's a popular thing. What is the percentage that there is some fighting, intergroup fighting going on? Yo, man, that one step you did, man, it was like.
Man, you like stepped all over my feet, man. You don't even know what it's about, man. Man, you know, like. I worked it out with you last night. Why are you acting like it's so new? Yeah, man, but you could ask me that. You asked me if you could come in on that dance. I asked you before we even went out there, you was asking. You asked me, can I come in on that dance? And I said, well, I guess because we's on tour together. But, man, I don't know. I need the money, though. Why are you tripping now? I know I ain't tripping, man. I know I need the money, though. Yeah, you are, man. We got a long tour to go. I know I need the money, man. Maybe you be cool. Yous ain't even relevant because. Youse was from like 20 years ago. I brought you on this tour. Youse ain't even relevant. You gonna bring your woman in and everything? I'm a guy. That's Joey McIntyre. Joey. Yeah. What's up, man? I thought you was a chick the whole time. I thought you was his chick. No, youse ain't even relevant. He got pretty mouth, doesn't he? Maybe that's the point where the joke went too far. You know what I'm saying? Could be. He got pretty mouth. Let me ask you a question. Ask me. All my sensibilities. Why you got to take the joke so far? Sometimes you got to push the envelopes. The plural thing kills me. New movie. New movie out today is what, Sienna? Sienna. Easy what? I know. Easy what? X-Men. First class. Let's take a listen.
A new species is being born. Yep. Beat it. James McAvoy, Kevin Bacon's in the movie, January Jones, Jennifer Lawrence. Here's another clip. Mankind will know that mutants exist. They'll fear us. And that fear will turn to hatred. May I ask you a question? Why is it that all superheroes need to be from Britain? All from England. They're all from England. They're all from England. Even people from other worlds. For instance, like Mordor. Why is it that a wizard is from Manchester? Why was Obi-Wan Kenobi? Excuse me, Obi-Wan. Yes. What part of the galaxy of Jonshire were you from? Right near the Thames River. You can see the Tower of London from my flat. I actually suspected that. It seems rather odd to me that a hobbit here in the middle of Mordor...
It's got an accent like proper British. It's true. They all do. Wizards. They're from Britain. Hobbits. Gnomes. Gnomes. But Darth Vader, not British. American. He's from Cleveland. Yeah, he's actually from Cleveland. He was raised in Cleveland, but then his family, because his father was in the military, moved to Tamper. Tamper. Tamper Bay. Topper Bay. Let's see. You going to see X-Men? Is that up your alley? You know what? I just watched a trailer for it this morning, and to me it looked cool. You know why? It's a prequel. You know what that is, Woodsy? Of course I know. Sorry. Oh, gosh. Prequels. Uh-oh. Come on. What are you talking to? It's two hours and 20 minutes, PG-13. Holy cow. It's two hours and 20 minutes? Yeah. Uh-huh. That's too long. Get your money worth. I wish it was seven hours. Should be. I had to pay $14. Should be seven hours. Put Jasper in my pocket so I don't have to pay for him. That's right. Once we got inside, I told him he was a midget so that they would give us extra profit. Little people, Mike. Little people. I don't know any better. I said he's a midget. That's how we get on Southwest so quick. That's right. True story. Pick up my eight-year-old. Now, this is a true story. Pick up my eight-year-old and acts like he's in some sort of a little baby bjorn. Bjorn. Bjorn. Bjorn.
Yeah, I put him in a baby bajorn. Now, he's eight. I'm going to tell you, he's eight. But it works every time. Now, sometimes they say, I'm sorry, sir, but that looks like an eight-year-old. And then that's when I break out my cast. I tell him he's got some sort of growth hormone. That's right. He just looks big. Yeah. He's big for his age, but we eat a lot of antibiotics in our food. Hormones. Steroids. That's right. Boys on steroids. Let us on. All right, Woods, let her in. She is going to be so mad because it's so late. So late. It's Eskimo Blue Waters. You guys having a good time? Yeah, we're having a great time. Eskimo is a local musician, entertainer. Professional waiter. Professional, yeah, she waits. Not a server, wait. Wait. She has to wait. Wait for Mikey. She has to wait for me. You know, she's a local. Now, this is what people need to know. Her real name is Judy Douche. No? No. What is it? It's Douche, and I've legally changed it. You've legally changed it? Yes. To Douche? No, to Eskimo Blue Waters. Blue Waters, okay. Who has a real website, by the way, and it's what? EskimoBlueWaters.com. Makes sense, right? Now, she's also on Twitter, and you had to put it official, right? Official EBW. Official EBW on Twitter. Yes. How many followers now? Oh, somewhere in the hundreds.
I don't know. I lost count. How can you lose count if it's only in the hundreds? And it says right on there how much it is. You don't have to lose count if it says on there. I don't pay attention to the small stuff. Yeah, it's a small print. Eskimo is here today. Jay just wrote that she was here for an interview, so he must have forgot what she's here for. What are you here for? Well, I was just curious why you haven't asked to interview me yet for my new business venture. Your new business venture is what? An answering machine service. What is that? You answer the phone? No, I'm a voiceover actress for answering machines. Really? Yeah. Like voicemails and answering machines? Yeah, if you want a celebrity to put your voice, oh, hello, this is, you know, and then I would put a name in there and then they would say, oh, that's EBW, you know.
So you would say, hey, this is EBW, Eskimo Blue Waters, and Paul can't come to the phone. Yes, exactly. Well, but how can you do a celebrity? Because I'm the celebrity. That's what I'm saying. You're the celebrity. Yeah, so people would pay me because it'd be cool to have me do their outgoing voicemail. How much do you charge? It depends. Okay, it depends on what? Word count. Word count. Charged by the word? Yeah, yeah, yeah. How much a word? Probably like 20 bucks a word. Probably. Probably, probably. Okay, what about Woods? Can you do his? Yeah, I can do that. Right now? Yeah. It's on. Oh, shoot. Okay. Try it. Sorry. She gets nervous. Take two. Hang on. This is Woods. When she gets nervous. This is... I'll just stick with what I have. She makes some noise when she gets nervous. How can I restart it? I'll just stick with the one that I have. Stick the one you have. It says, hey, it's what's up here. I just... I need a... You have that nervous tick when you do the thing. Oh, wow. Oh, my gosh. She's nervous now. Can I... I can try one more time. Go ahead. Try it again. Just don't push any buttons. Hello, this is the...
Oh, wow. That's not very far into it. All right. Well, I need a recording booth. I can't work in a video. You work in a recording booth to record it. So we'll do it later. No, it makes sense. Okay. It makes sense. There was a woman that was arrested for aggravated buttering. Battery? No. You said the buttering. That's what I said. Is he going to write it down wrong on that? No. Aggravated buttering. And I'll tell you all about it. Make some noise in the studio. Live studio audience, we'll be back. With everything in this country tied up in the court systems, I think we need a little more of this. The Mikey Show now. Shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. Call 570-1949. This is The Mikey Show. On FM 94.9. Be a part of the celebration on June 4th at the grand opening of Linares Belmont Community and the amazing San Alejo Hills Master Plan in San Marcos. Come tour the new models of these beautifully appointed detached homes with floor plans up to 2,093 square feet. A host of luxury upgrades and an exclusive pool and spa for residents only coming soon. And the best part? Prices start from just the upper $300,000. Which means you can turn your dream of owning a beautiful new home in an award-winning community into a reality.
So join us for the grand opening on June 4th from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. at the Belmont Welcome Home Center at San Alejo and Wild Canyon Roads in San Marcos. Tour the new models and enjoy food and festivities with prices from the upper $300,000. You won't believe it until you see it. For more information, visit Lenar.com or call 877-205-2053. Homes come equipped with a solar energy system and are subject to a 10-year lease agreement. Prices subject to change without notice. Lenar Homes of California, Incorporated, license number 728102. Lenar Sales Corporation, DRE, license number 01252753. Equal housing opportunity. Wake up to a flat-out delicious deal from Subway, the new $3 flatbread breakfast combo, a tasty, toasty 6-inch flatbread breakfast sandwich, and a 16-ounce cup of freshly brewed Seattle's best coffee, all for just $3. Tempt your taste buds and choose from the Egg & Cheese, Black Forest Ham Egg & Cheese, or the Bacon Egg & Cheese, morning masterpieces of monumental proportions, built fresh from the flatbread up.
Put your spin on one with everything from juicy tomatoes to spicy jalapenos. Maybe even Chipotle Southwest sauce for a bold kick. Pair it with a rich, fresh cup of Seattle's best coffee, and it's all just $3. The new $3 flatbread breakfast combo, only at Subway. If I told you my grandma used to give me mother's cookies, I'd be lying. She didn't exactly give them to me. She was far craftier than that, which is why I loved her. She had this whole method. She'd plant some circus animal cookies on her dresser, and then she'd send me on a decoy mission to go get something for my quote-unquote forgetful old grandmother. Then, to distract Mom, she'd create a diversion. To buy me some time, she'd really milk it, too, so I could pop the cookies in my mouth and quietly let the pink frosting dissolve on my tongue. It was all kind of genius, or at least I thought it was.
Until my mom became a grandma herself. A crafty grandma. That's when I realized that mom was in on it all along. Now, so am I. And my daughter thinks the whole thing is just awesome. Mother's cookies. There's a memory in every bite. The San Diego County Fair opens next week, and here's your ticket to ride. On Pepsi Pay One Price Ride Days, enjoy unlimited rides from noon to 8. Purchase select Pepsi products at Albertson Savon for a discount coupon. Visit sdfair.com for details. Miles to the mile at the San Diego County. Presented by Albertson Savon. When you buy something, you expect it to work. But what if you can't tell right away if it's working or not? Like when you buy gasoline. Sure, all gasolines work as in your car moves, but many leave deposits that can reduce your fuel economy and performance over time. But Chevron with Tecron works to keep your car running great and maximize your fuel economy. Now that works. Chevron with Tecron. Care for your car. At Vons, you can count on low prices. With amazing Vons Club specials and everyday low prices, you can get what you want when you want it at the price you need. That's their promise. That's ingredients for life. Vons.
And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm as feminine around my guy friends as I am around my wife. Lauren. My voice is always sweet. Woods. If I had my choice, I'd be sitting on a beach having a Marlboro. Then doing nothing. Sitting. Playing my guitar. That's it. Sienna. I've always wanted to punch someone in the face. And Jay. I killed my first deer when I was seven. On FM 94.9. New Mikey Show sweatshirt is in. The official Mikey Show hoodie is available and on sale. Special edition. It's the Wired series from our friends at Rusty, so it's got MP3 compatible headphones built into the drawstrings. It's really cool. Built in, washable, $65 while supplies last. Right here at the FM 94.9 studios. I've always enjoyed the sound of Chino Moreno's voice. Listened to this song no less than a million times last year. It's difficult to not like. Seriously. Got a friend on the line.
Somebody that we all know here on the Mikey Show and who, man, all of our lives here on the Mikey Show have been touched by her. Her story was on the news. It's my neighbor, Amy. Hi, Amy. Hi. How you doing? How are you doing? Good. The reason that, well, we know her because she's a neighbor. But our lives were all changed last Halloween. Because we all got a text from Amy about her little girl, Angelina, who at the time was nine months old? Yep, nine months. She was nine months old. And we got a text. She wanted us to pray for Angelina because they had just found out that Angelina had cancer. And she's gone through all sorts of treatments at Rady Children's Hospital, has flown out to New York City, and has had...
Surgery done in New York City and is actually doing really well. She's doing really well. In fact, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Praise God. Yeah, praise God. Her story was on the news here in San Diego. There's been benefits for her. It's actually where Woods met professional baseball player Mike Sweeney. His crush. Yes, his crush. Philadelphia Phillies. Mike Sweeney and Woods saw him in the hospital room when we were visiting Angelina at Rady Children's Hospital. And Amy's husband, Dom, at one time was going to be a professional baseball player and messed his knee up. But he knows a lot of guys still. And one of his friends was Mike Sweeney of the Philadelphia Phillies. He was in the room that day, Mike Sweeney. And Woods looked at him and said, through tears, you know, we were all crying at the time. Weeping. Weeping. And this guy standing next to Woods consoled Woods by, you know, patting him on the back. And Woods looked at him and said, Do I know you? Do you play baseball? The guy said, Yeah, I do. And Woods goes, SDLBA? ABL. SDABL? San Diego Adult Baseball League. That's what Woods plays in.
Woods plays in the San Diego Adult Baseball League and thought he recognized him from the San Diego Adult Baseball League. No, Woods. And he said, no, my name is Mike Sweeney. I play for the Philadelphia Phillies. May have heard of me. And Woods went, oh, oh. Can I tell the rest of the story? Absolutely. Fire away. So we had a moment in there. It was really a moment. Praying for Angelina. Yeah, we prayed for Angelina. Crying for her. Crying. And then they had to take Angelina away to surgery. And so they came. They got Angelina. And they took her out of the room. And we all just sort of filed out after her. And we're walking down the hallway. And sort of at the end of the procession was me, Woods, and Mike Sweeney. And we're all in tears. It was an emotional heavy moment. And Woods says to Mike, he goes, yeah.
That's an heavy day, huh? Mike says, yeah, it is. Woods goes, hey man, you play at that new Yankee Stadium yet? Clown. True story. Mike Sweeney goes, yeah, yeah, I have. And Woods goes, it's pretty badass, huh? Sweeney goes, yeah, yeah, it is. King of timing. Yeah. But I'll tell you what. It's kind of like swinging a golf club in a hospital room. Like your dad does. But let me tell you something. Mike Sweeney, by the end of that day, said, hey, man, let me get your number. True.
How'd that work out? Didn't you ask him to be a stub on the team or something? Yeah, no, I asked him if he'd help me with my swing. He texted me a couple weeks ago, actually. He's checking in. No big deal. Hope you're doing well. You know, same bit. Miss you, brother, is what he said. We should play golf. He did, too. He's just tracking you. He said, miss you, brother. We should play golf sometime. On my mother. Woods was a emcee at an event for Angelina. A lot of professional baseball players there, including Trevor Hoffman. David Wells, Trevor Hoffman, Jake Peavy. It was awesome for me. Woods asked Trevor Hoffman if he would consider, since he's now retired, if he would consider... being a pitcher for what's adult baseball league. Hey, we need a closer. He's the freaking all-time saves leader. Guy's probably used to being out of the house. You know, wife probably breaking his balls all the time. Maybe he wants to come out and throw on Sundays. I told him I'd give him a ride to games and a free jersey. That is a leap. Trevor respectfully declined. Respectfully declined. Shocking. But, you know.
Hey, I'll tell you this. They love woods. Those pro baseball players, they love them some woods. They were laughing. It's a true story. They're both ways. So, Amy, there's something going on. Is it this weekend? Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tell everybody about it and how we can be involved and how this will help Angelina. Okay, well, it's called Touch a Truck, and it's at Torrey Pines High School tomorrow from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. And it's a really cool event. It was started by a family who actually lost their son to neuroblastoma, which is a disease that Angelina is fighting. And it's going to be awesome. There's going to be all kinds of trucks, hummers, construction rigs, UPS trucks, military, lowriders, race cars, any kind of hot rod that you can think of. The kids are going to be able to climb in them and honk the horn and touch them. That's awesome. Yeah, it's going to be awesome. And, you know, it's fun for adults, too. There's going to be face painting, hair bling, mini spa treatments for the moms. I think I want to get in. Cool. There's going to be live music. The San Diego Star Wars Society is going to be there. I think that's what Luca is most excited about. Oh, that's cool. And so it's only $5.
That's awesome. And you can buy your tickets online. The website is www.touchatrucksd.com. Can we buy them there, Amy, if we want to go? You can buy them there, but they're actually hoping to sell out. So it's a good idea to get it ahead of time. And 100% of the money raised is going to go to childhood cancer research. That's great. That is great. You know, a lot of times not always 100% goes. to the cause, and this time it is 100%, and it's a great way to take the kids out and have a fun day and also, you know, do something good. Hey, I'm going to ask my listeners something because M1 Nation is listening. If you are of the praying type, pray for little Angelina because there is a lot of power in prayer. And so I ask that people, if you are the praying type, to pray for Angelina. And specifically, what would you like the prayer to be, Amy? Just for God to remove the remaining cancer that's left in her spine. Yeah.
And I remember that you were teaching the terminology of it. You've become pretty acquainted with a lot of terminology lately. I feel like I just took a nursing course or a medical course. It's true. It's true. But she's so cute. She's so sweet. And she is a testimony to answered prayer. If anybody wants to read about her, they're more than welcome to go to her CaringBridge site. How do you do that? You just go to www.caringbridge.org and you can type in Angelina Repetti and her site will come up. You do have to enter in your email and make up a password. But you can read about how prayers have been answered already. Angelina Repetti, it's R-E-P-P-E-T-T-I? No. No? Get it right. How do you spell it? R-E-P-E-T... R-E-P-E-T-T-I. There you go. One P, two Ts. Got it. There you go. She's a firecracker. Amy? Oh, yeah. She'll get you. She's the greatest. She's the best. Marina's a firecracker, too. That's right. I know it. Toughest kid I know. Hey, we love you, Amy, and thank you, and we hope to get a bunch of people out there. Thank you. I'll be there volunteering. I'll have a crew T-shirt on. I'll be in charge of one of the vehicles, so come and say hi to me. Right on. Thanks a lot. Okay. Love you. Love you. That's Amy.
She's so cool. Hey, Mike, I posted the link on the Mikey Show Facebook page. Oh, nice. They can go straight there and get all the information. It's really cool because, you know, you will get these updates. You'll get an email and it'll give you an update. You click on it and you can just kind of know what's going on with Angelina. And it's been kind of a cool thing to bring M1s along on this deal, you know, because they really are not going through this thing on their own. Listeners have come along all through this process, and it's amazing. I know when my wife, Jamie, who's friends with Amy, too, I know when she's reading Carrying Bridge in bed because she starts weeping a lot of the times. I'm like, oh, new Carrying Bridge. Then I grab my phone and I read it. She's a fighter, man. That whole family is a bunch of fighters. Yeah, they are. All right. Yes. Don't go anywhere. We'll be right back. Make some noise in our live studio audience. Skeletor, that's Terminator's wife. You think you got something worth adding to the Mikey show? At 949mikey at gmail.com. Or call Mikey now, 570-1949. I don't like how this is already beginning. FM 94.9. It's sold out. FM 94.9 Independence Jam. Coastal Invasion. Get this train. This Sunday, the Oceanside Pier Amphitheater.
Presented by Triple Hops Brewed Miller Lite. Taste Greatness. Performing on the FM 94.9 stage. Cold War Kids. Leaky Lee. Peter, Bjorn, and John. Band of Skulls. Everest. Performing on the Casbah stage. The Silent Comedy. Crocodile. Surfer Blood. The Soft Pack. Heavy Hawaii. And performing wherever he can plug in. Low volts. You can't buy tickets, but we will be giving some away. Keep listening to FM 94.9 for details about upcoming random acts of kindness. A special thanks to Grubby's and Los Tacos for helping to support this year's Independence Jam. See you this Sunday in Oceanside with FM 94.9. HalfPriceSanDiego.com brings you great deals every week to local area restaurants, spas, golf, retail, and more. Sign up for free now at HalfPriceSanDiego.com. Looking for rock-bottom prices on a huge selection of pottery, planters, vases, and fountains? Canyon Pottery is having its biggest blowout sale ever.
Everything's at least 40% off retail, and many items have double markdowns for even bigger savings. Visit Canyon Pottery in the Terracotta building on Arrow Drive in Kearney Mesa. And this week at HalfPriceSanDiego.com, we have an amazing half-price deal to the Ryan Thomas Hair Studio. From avant-garde to classic, the stylists of Ryan Thomas Hair Studio create the latest styles with artful precision. Their creative team is at the forefront of innovation both technically and artistically, providing clients with gorgeous color and chic cuts in the luxurious comfort of their custom-designed studio. and Encinitas. Go to RyanThomasHairStudio.com and see why they were voted Best Salon by San Diego Magazine. Our members save money all the time, and you can too at HalfPriceSanDiego.com. Chicken McNuggets foul! Whoa, whoa, whoa, what? Look, these aren't fries, Doug. These are McDonald's Chicken McNuggets. There are rules. You can't just grab them like that. Yeah, but you got 20 of them for $4.99. McNuggets rule number one. Always ask before taking one, even though, yes, the 20 piece is now just $4.99. All right, note. Taken. Two, never ever double dip. But what if I... Flip the McNugget on its other side? Yeah. Yeah, that's acceptable. Well, that's a relief. But no crossovers. Dipping into barbecue sauce after sweet and sour will result in a major penalty. So, choose your sauce wisely. The simple joy of golden, crispy deliciousness. The irresistibly tender and juicy McDonald's 20-piece chicken McNuggets are now just $4.99 every day. Most important rule.
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So I'm at the Verizon store because Father's Day is here, my son is graduating, and they're both big into technology. So I asked the sales guy, got anything for techies? And he's like, tons. Maybe the Android-powered Samsung Galaxy Tab or the Motorola Zoom. It's Verizon's first 4G LTE upgradable tablet. So I say, hmm. But in my head, I'm thinking. Then I say, okay, but aren't those super expensive? And he says, nope, we've got tablets starting at $199.99. And now my brain's going. Dads and grads deserve gifts that run on the largest high-speed wireless network in America. Get a wide selection of tablets at great prices from the people who know them best. Visit any Verizon store, verizonwireless.com, or call 1-800-256-4646. Verizon, built so you can rule the air. New two-year activation and mobile broadband plan required. Early termination and other fees apply. Coverage details at verizonwireless.com. The Home Depot has made a special buy on exclusive Hunter Highbury ceiling fans at just $89.88.
Valued at $150, you get a ceiling fan for under $90 to keep things cool, a remote control to keep things easy, and a lifetime warranty to keep you from having to replace it down the road. All thanks to a special buy and exclusive Hunter Highberry Ceiling Fans, just $89.88. More saving, more doing. That's the power of the Home Depot. U.S. only. See store for details. Now through June 4th, buy one, get one free on select Walgreens brand cold, allergy, and sinus relief products. They're recommended by Walgreens pharmacists. Walgreens, there's an everyday way to stay well. Man, I can't wait to see the new X-Men movie, X-Men First Class. Man, I'm telling you, they're comparing it to The Dark Knight, which is the best Marvel movie to date. I mean, dude, if Drew Barrymore called and asked me out, I wouldn't go out with her unless she'd go to see X-Men First Class. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. When I see people at baseball games or at the fair and they're walking around with a white cardboard stick and it's got cotton candy wrapped around it, I feel sorry for them. That's a true statement. Lauren. The best way to clean your house? Yeah. In your underwear. Woods. You know what's good? Cheesecake. Sienna. I do everything for Todd, I swear. I pick out his clothes, I make his meals, I make all of his appointments. And Jake. I am a boob man. On FM 94.9.
Welcome back. Tonight's 8 o'clock album, The Cult. You're it. Album is electric. It's a good one. All right, so, Sienna, exactly how does somebody get arrested for aggravated buttering? Actually, that's one that you have. Here you go. You want to do it? Yeah, I haven't seen this, but Jay did this, so thanks, Jay. Jay found this. Last week, 49-year-old Don Elizabeth from... Kohler County in Florida. Weird. Of course, Florida. Was drunk on vodka and got into an argument with her male roommate. Things escalated, of course, as you can imagine. And she ended up throwing a stick of butter at him. Wow. That's right. It hit him in the leg. Police were called. When they arrived, their report says that they noticed the roommate, quote, did have butter smeared on his ankle. Oh, wow. So she...
She was arrested for misdemeanor battery, basically for aggravated buttering. Battery? She's still denying that she threw any butter. Oh, wow. That's actually buttery. She's denying that she threw butter? Yes. I didn't throw no butter at him. Yeah, I didn't do it. Well, then why do we see butter all over his leg? I don't know. Maybe he dropped some pancakes. Fat slob. 570-1949 is our number. Beginning and end of every show, we do an open phone segment so we can say you can talk about anything you want or call in about anything you want. Ella B had to leave early today. She's going to fly to see family. Anybody else got anything going on this weekend that they want to promote or talk about or any of that stuff that they're doing this weekend? Independence Jam. Independence Jam. We'll be there. Indy Jam is on Sunday. Cold War Kids, Leaky Lee, Peter... Peter, Bjorn, and John, Band of Skulls, Everest, The Silent Comedy, Crocodiles, Surfer Blood, The Soft Pack, and Heavy Hawaii. Again, it's Sunday Oceanside Amphitheater. And hopefully you've already got tickets. If you don't, don't worry about it. There's still more ways to get tickets. In fact, thank you to Grubbies who came in today. They're going to be doing a random act of kindness today. And you can go out there and get yourself a...
tickets to the sold-out Independence Jam. It's 1034 South Coast Highway in Oceanside, and their website is eatgrubbies.com. Give me food. Thank you. So yeah, hopefully everybody can get out there and take part in that. It's been a great studio audience today, man. We had a really great studio audience. Good looking. A little strange. End of the show on Friday. I give you my testimony. And my testimony is my story. And, you know, the reason that I do that is because I know that there are people that are listening right now that are going through a lot of the same things that I went through. And I want to tell you my story because hopefully my story reminds you of yourself. And there's something in it that can help you. My story is that when I was a kid, I was sexually abused. I was five years old. and carried around with me a lot of guilt and shame that I didn't think about. I just blocked it out. I didn't think about it. But what I didn't realize, it was like, and I've said this before, it's kind of like you get into an accident on a road and you get gravel under your skin, and it heals. But if you touch it just right, it'll hurt like crazy.
And that's kind of how I felt as I was growing up. In my 20s, I desperately wanted people to accept and like me. I wanted that my whole life. But man, in my 20s, I felt that really, really strong. That I really wanted people to accept and like me. And I'd gone through everything, man. I'd been through eating disorders. I'd been through addiction to alcohol. to drugs. And there was a time in my life, earlier in my life, where I had allowed God into my life, but then I just sort of went my own separate way. And to some of you that are listening right now that are desperate and lonely and hopeless, you feel just hopeless. I've been there in a place where I just felt absolutely hopeless, like there was nothing to look forward to. I remember at one time in my life, I used to drive home.
And I would try to think of something that I could look forward to. I always had to have something that I could look forward to. And that's what would like kind of get me through. And it never, ever did. Nothing that I ever tried to look forward to. After that thing happened, I never felt better. And then in 2003, I was a pathetic alcoholic. The most pathetic kind of alcoholic you can imagine. Kind of alcoholic where my dad finally said, I can't talk to you if you continue to drink. With big tears in his eyes. And I gave my life to Jesus Christ. I gave up and I gave my life to Jesus Christ. And I asked him to come into my heart. Now, I tell you this because I know that there are some of you listening right now that are experiencing some of the same stuff that I just talked about.
If you go to Mikey show.com at the top of the page is the word help. If you click on that word, there's a lot of resources for you to be able to overcome addictions, to be able to overcome all those different kinds of things. And so I urge you to go there and check it out. He changed and transformed my life and where I used to always be looking forward to something and nothing ever fulfilling it. That's not the deal anymore. Now I know. inside of my head and inside of my heart and with every ounce of my being and every cell of my body, I know that I have the most amazing eternity to look forward to. And if you want any of that, any of it, Jesus doesn't have a website, but my church does. It's northcoastchurch.com. I don't give it out very often, but every once in a while I do because I know people are searching, man. They're just hurting. And so I give that out to you if you're looking for
a place that was voted one of the top coolest churches in America. I play a song at the end of the show that hopefully the lyrics mean something to you. This is exactly where I was at one time. It's by a band called Red, and the song is called Pieces. Lovely and talented Hillary is up next. Enjoy your weekend, and we will come back here on Monday and do this all over again. The Mikey Show's out late.