The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 06/07/11
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Anthony Weiner press conferenceUSC 2004 title strippedGas price gameAngry theater voicemailWelfare drug test debateApple iCloud and Lion OS announcementLady Gaga Lebanon ban mediationCarmageddon 405 closureweineruscgaspricetheatervoicemail
In this episode, host Mikey and his team dissected Anthony Weiner's tearful press conference, with producer Jay's sound effect becoming a running joke about an erection. They also covered the vacating of USC's 2004 football title, the gas‑price game that awarded fair tickets to callers Tammy and P‑Dog, and an angry theater voicemail that sparked a debate on texting during movies. Other segments included a heated discussion of Florida's welfare drug‑test proposal, a walkthrough of Apple's iCloud and Lion OS unveiling via a British‑kid livestream, a mediation‑style call between Lady Gaga and a Lebanese official over her banned album, and a warning about the impending 'Carmageddon' 405 freeway closure.
What happened, in order
Weiner Press Conference & Sound Effect
The hosts dissect Anthony Weiner's tearful apology press conference while producer Jay plays a sound effect they joke sounds like an erection.
Angry Theater Voicemail
A young woman leaves an angry voicemail after being ejected from a theater for texting during a movie, sparking a debate on theater etiquette.
USC Championship Vacated
Woods explains that USC's 2004 national championship was stripped due to Reggie Bush's improper benefits, leaving the title vacant.
Apple iCloud & Lion OS Reveal
Mikey describes watching the WWDC stream via two British kids on Ustream, revealing Apple's new iCloud music service and the upcoming Lion operating system.
Gas Price Game Winners
Callers Tammy and P-Dog guess whether convenience‑store items are over or under the $4 median gas price, winning fair tickets for three correct answers.
Welfare Drug Test Debate
The crew discusses Florida Governor Rick Scott's proposal to drug‑test welfare recipients, weighing deterrent benefits against accusations of stigmatizing the poor.
Lady Gaga Lebanon Ban Mediation
Hosts mediate a call between Lady Gaga and a Lebanese official over her banned album 'Born This Way,' discussing artistic freedom versus moral objections.
Carmageddon 405 Closure
Warning about a 10‑mile closure of the 405 freeway July 16‑17 for major road work, dubbed 'Carmageddon' and expected to cause massive traffic.
People mentioned
MikeyWoodsyLauren O'BrienSiennaJayChrisAnthony WeinerHuma WeinerMegan BroussardParis HiltonBill ClintonReggie BushBill HancockSteve Jobs
32,298 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
And we had to take the day off yesterday because I had a sick house on my hands. I had my son Ryan thrown up sick and I had my wife thrown up sick. And my wife couldn't take care of Ryan. And so I had to take care of Ryan and take care of her. And then Jake didn't go to school because it would throw every long explanation for all of it. But anyway, I had to stay home yesterday. And so we had to call the show Kaputi because I didn't have anybody. And by the way, Garrett has filled in. Garrett, our program director, has filled in. But he didn't get home until 2.45 from Independence Jam. Wow. So he couldn't have done it. And the only other option was Lou, and that was in the middle of the night. So I wasn't going to call Lou at... 12 o'clock at night and say, hey, buddy, you want to go in in five hours? So you played Florence Nightingale all day. Yeah, exactly. I just played that all day long. Welcome to the program. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. I'm 41. Woodsy is our sports guy. He is 35. Lauren O'Brien is our resident comedian and our assistant producer. She's 30. Sienna is our news girl. She is 26.
Our producer is Jay. He's 47, but not for long. Stop it. He'll be 48. Dang it. I believe two weeks from today. Yeah, June 20th. Wow. How about that, you guys? Let me get this. Let me get this. Be my mom's age. Oh, my God. Never get told. 48. 48. Goodness. That's right. It's almost 50, pal. That's right. Killing me. 50. Yeah, it's definitely late 40s. Oh, yeah. It's the end of the 40s. Let's see. And our phone screener today is Chris. It's Krauss. It's Krauss. Word of the day is labor. Be listening for me to say that word between now and 10 and caller nine gets a four packet tickets to the fair, which you can't wait for. And also brunch at Vigalucci's, which is a great Italian restaurant. They got seven locations in San Diego, all the way from Carlsbad to Coronado. They're really good. So that's word of the day. Is going to get you today. Anthony Weiner. Held a press conference yesterday. Now if you're. If you've been sleeping in a cave. And you don't know who Anthony Weiner is. He is the guy. That allegedly. Sent pictures of himself. Shirtless. In underwear. With a bulge. To a co-ed.
Okay. And when the news came out. Is that wrong? It is. He's a married man. He's a married man. And so the news came out that he had done this. And he said, well, somebody must have hacked my Twitter account and done this. We have to have experts take a look at this. And we were all saying, why don't you just say it, dude? You're making it way worse for yourself by not saying it. And then he held a press conference yesterday and said the following. At the outset, I'd like to make it clear that I have made terrible mistakes that have hurt the people I care about the most. And I'm deeply sorry. I have not been honest with myself, my family, my constituents, my friends and supporters and the media. Last Friday night, I tweeted a photograph of myself. For the record, you know, Lester there. be any confusion as someone is listening for the first time, lest there be any confusion. Anthony Weiner did not play the sound effects. Okay, because a lot of people may say, how inappropriate. How inappropriate that he is giving a press conference saying, I'm sorry. And at the same time, he's making such light of it that he's actually got a soundboard there to play sound effects. No. Our producer, Jay. Our producer, Jay.
is playing the sound effects, not Representative Wiener. Nor is Anthony Wiener jumping off a diving board in the middle of this press conference. Which we've never understood that particular sound effect in context. Why would there be a diving board sound effect? But in talking to Jay about it off the air, Jay says, no, I think it sounds like an erection. And we go, no, it doesn't. It sounds like a diving board. That I intended to send as a direct message as part of a joke to a woman in Seattle. As part of a joke? A joke! Oh no, he's lying again! He's lying again! You didn't mean it as a joke. Wiener is unraveled. And for the record, I didn't even feel that in context Jay should play the sound effect. Once I realized I had posted to Twitter, I panicked. I took it down and said that I had been hacked. Okay, here's the deal. He meant to send it directly to her on Twitter, which you can do. You can direct message someone. And what he accidentally did is sent it out to anyone following him, to the universe he sent it out to. Instead of direct messaging, he sent it to the universe. Imagine that panic. That panic. When you realized everyone that follows me saw this. Oh, boy.
I then continued with that story to stick to that story, which was a hugely regrettable mistake. This woman was unwittingly dragged into this and bears absolutely no responsibility. I'm so sorry to have disrupted her life in this way. Now, by the way, it's easy to do this mistake. Now, when I was new to Twitter, I was following a couple of people, one of which was a former morning show DJ. Not on the mornings anymore. He's no longer a morning show DJ here in San Diego. And I was following said person. And they would post things in their Twitter that made me uncomfortable. And I didn't know anything about Twitter. So I stopped following them. Well, unbeknownst to me, they knew I stopped following them. Now, even to this day. I have about 3,000 followers on Twitter. I don't know how to find out if somebody's not following me anymore. To be honest with you, I know very specific people that follow me for sure, but I know way less about the people that do follow me. If you want to follow any of us on Twitter, just put Mikey Show Mikey and our name. Mikey Show Mikey. Excuse me, Mikey Show and then our name.
Mikey show Jay, Mikey show Lauren, Mikey show Woods, Mikey show Sienna, Mikey show Mikey. Anyway, so this person said on Twitter, why did you stop following me? Now, I assumed that that was like coming only from my eyes. I never in a million years would I think that anybody would say to the world and to everyone following them. why did you stop following me? And I said, my response was complete and genuine and transparent honesty. I said, my goodness, I didn't know that you could tell if I stopped following you. And I said, and oh my goodness, some of the things that you would put made me uncomfortable. And if you want me to be more specific, I can, but I can spare you that. And then,
You know, they said back, no, thanks. I don't want you to tell me. And I said, OK. And then I looked at it and I was like, and I just asked because I didn't know what the deal was. I said, hey, can anyone else see this conversation we're having? And while I was doing that, I was basically saying to the entire Twitter world, hey, can anybody see this conversation that we're having? I didn't know. And he wrote back, yeah, they can. And now he was. Twitter savvy. He knew what he was doing. I didn't know. And certainly didn't think that. And this guy had a lot of followers. And you can only direct message somebody that is following you. So this chick must have been following him. She must have been following Wiener. I wonder if Wiener knew. And he was following her. Right. But Wiener did know this girl. Did he not? He liked you what he sees. Did he just like what he saw? Yeah, he liked what he saw. What happened was.
Now, what I read was that she responded to a Facebook message that he had written on his fan page. She responded and she said, that's hot. That got his attention. Oh, boy. In fact, her name is Megan Broussard. And here she is talking about it with ABC's Nightline. He said, I'm an open book, maybe too open. 26-year-old Megan Broussard of Texas is a single mother who says she first became acquainted with Wiener on April 20th after seeing this video online. And commenting on his Facebook page, it was hot. Now, what does that mean? I like to see someone who actually stood for something and was passionate about something. Broussard says... Now, by the way, I try in my daily life, not only on the radio, but I try to stand for something. I've never received any message that says, that's hot. Hey, Mikey, that's hot. I have. Hundreds and hundreds and thousands. What's better than thousands? If I posted one of my turds, I'd get something said that's hot. You know Paris Hilton has that phrase, that's hot? She's looking at me when she said it. That's right. You know what? It kind of makes me mad that nobody really talks about that. The reason for Paris Hilton's comment was, she saw me. That's hot.
I know. I know. I'm sorry, Paris. I'm just standing there. I know. I told you I know. I heard you. I'm trying not to be, okay? I have a wife. Okay. I get it. Take a picture. Immediately responded to her Facebook comment. What she says soon followed was a flirtatious internet relationship, including, she claims, Over 100 instant messages and eventually pictures. But he was eager to hear about if I wanted him or thought he was attractive. How much of it was sex talk? I mean, he would attempt all the time. You can hear that little southern accent. All the way in. All the time. So he did plenty of it, just got caught that time. Yes. Says she also received this bare-chested shot of Wiener with photos in the background showing. She's just making me horny. Why can't they say Representative Wiener? They're all doing it. Every media outlet's like, Wiener had a press conference. None of them say Anthony or Representative. It's all Wiener. And they're not even trying to hide the fact that they want to be sophomoric and salacious about it. His wife and the Clintons. You can't. You can't. The guy's name is Wiener. Listen, if there was a senator.
And her name was Barbara Boobies. Yeah. I'd vote for her. Of course she would. You can bet, you can bet that all professional, I mean, Tom Brokaw would come on and go, Boobies in a pinch. More than 11. And he says she received an explicit photo of a man's exposed private parts. When you got that photo, what did you think? I didn't think it was him. I'll tell you that. Thought, liar. Thought it was risky. Real risky. Did you mean to say risque? Or did you mean to say risky? Risky. Risky. Because of his position. Of course it was risky. Because of Wiener's position. Yeah, what position it was? Oh, shut it. Gosh, darn it. How many of those pictures must he take in before he sent the final one? Oh, man. This is the one I'm going with. It looks the best there. It's the best angle. It's great lighting. It's great lighting. Makeup. Yeah, what thought goes behind? This is the one. There's a lot of preparation. A lot of prep. Fanny. Yeah. Come on, fella.
Like different backdrops? In the bedroom? No. In the bathroom? No. What about the shower? No. How about outside by a palm tree? No, no. It has to be a pygmy palm then. What an idiot. What a snort there. Oh, boy. And that's ridiculous. It would be next to the Washington Monument. Obviously. Obviously. Maybe a bunch of bananas. It's on Abe Lincoln's hand when he's sitting in that chair. The Lincoln Memorial. What? The Oval Office. Someone asked me the other day. Someone said, someone said, Mikey. True story. Mikey, with your values and everything on the air, how do you do it? You know, is it difficult? And I said, yes, it is difficult. And they said, why? I said, because the people that I work with are extraordinarily clever and funny. And it makes it harder for me because they're very talented people. You know? And so I hear things sometimes and I go, well...
I'm not going to laugh at that. Well, it's not a choice, buddy, because you just got hit in the knee with a little rubber mallet. You react. You react. I'm sorry, you know. Sorry. Sorry to put you in that spot. Roussard says she decided to come forward with her story after watching Wiener on TV last night. He made a video as well. All right. Come on, dude. ...to explain his predicament. It was a hoax. It was someone sending a picture of a wiener on Wiener's account. I would account the wieners. This should be a drinking game. Hysterical. Hysterical why? Just because. I mean, I know he's lying, so it'd be one thing if you came out and you just said, hey, so what? But now we're saying you got hacked, and there's so many other women out there. She says she came forward because of concerns for her image as an aspiring nurse and that of her three-year-old daughter. Is this about politics for you? No. Do you dislike Anthony Wiener? No. Do you think he's a bad guy? No, I don't think he's a bad guy. I just think he's got issues. Just like everybody else. Hmm. Feel so bad for his wife. Oh, yeah. Mrs. Wiener. Married for less than a year. You're kidding. No. Well, first of all, you're now Mrs. Wiener. Right. Yeah. But after Chris Brown, after Elliot Spitzer, why did the decision to do such a thing, especially as a member of public office? This was a very dumb thing to do.
And it was a destructive thing to do. But it wasn't part of any plan to be hurtful to my wife. It wasn't part of plan to be... Of course it wasn't. It also wasn't... In no way was it meant to hurt your pets. In no way was this meant to cause harm to your cousins. We believe that this was not willful. I believe, Representative Wiener, that you did not go one day into the mountains alone to be retrospective and think of ways to hurt your wife. And upon reflecting on a mountaintop, you thought, I'll go on Twitter and put my doink out there. I didn't think that. So when you say, I didn't mean this to hurt you, that's so hollow. It doesn't mean anything. Listen, ladies, men, anytime that your significant other says to you, I never meant this to hurt you. You know what you could say back to him? I didn't think you did, dumb dumb. I didn't think you did do it to hurt me. I think you did it to make you happy. Deceitful to you wasn't part of a plan to be. It wasn't part of a plan. It was a destructive thing that I did that I accept responsibility for. But if you're looking for some kind of.
Deep explanation for it. I simply don't have one, except that I'm sorry. Well, I'll tell you what. We said it the other day. This is such a bigger deal now that he's having to admit it now. Wouldn't have been as big of a deal from the very beginning. He said, I screwed up, man. I did this. And the fact that he's coming out, and he, by the way, doing the right thing. I mean, he's doing the right thing by admitting it. half admitting it he's saying that he meant it as a joke you didn't mean it as a joke you meant it as a i want to hook up yeah come on uh let's see oh this is another big part of the story i am deeply regretted regretting what i have done and i am not resigning i have made it clear that i accept responsibility for this and people who draw conclusions about me are free to do so I've worked for the people of my district for 13 years and politics for 20 years. And I hope that they see fit to see this in the light that it is, which is a deeply regrettable mistake. Now, the problem is and, you know, I remember hearing one time somebody said just because Bill Clinton is not good at staying faithful to his wife doesn't mean that he can't be a great lawmaker, which is true. But what it does show is that he has very poor judgment.
which is an attribute that you want in a politician. You want them to have good judgment. You want them to be discerning. Good luck. You want them to be, well, there are. I mean, I feel like there are politicians on both sides of the fence, both Democrat, Republican. I think that there are good politicians. I don't think you can say that all politicians are bad. I mean, in fact, to do so. Would mean that we don't believe in the very country that we live in. This is why we have representatives, politicians, people that represent us. The reason that we do is because we live in a killer country. Badass. It's great that we have that. Still a messed up system. Sure, but dude, it's a great system. Democracy works. It's a good system. We have a good system. We got flawed people. People are flawed. Absolutely. You know what I mean? You're never going to get rid of that. But I mean, sad. Okay, let's see. Okay, here he is talking about his wife. When did you tell your wife? My wife has known about some of these online relationships since before we were married. And we spoke frankly about them because, well, we spoke frankly about them. But she didn't know until this morning that I had not been telling the truth about whether I posted the Twitter posting last week. What does that mean? She knew before they got married. He was a creep. He was a creep.
Yeah. He said relationships. Is he implying that she was okay with this? I'm sure she wasn't, but I'm sure it was an ongoing battle they were having. And he probably said, look, I want to marry you. I'm done with this. I'm sure. And she was like, okay, as long as you don't do it again. Right. Or maybe. I mean, I can only assume that. Maybe she's all in. No. In my mind, she's all in. Of course. That would be like fantasy land. Heaven. You're not on earth. I'm just going to put this out there. Please don't, Jay. I'm going to. I'm going to tell you. I was never a writer back in the 70s. But had I been and I got to write for the show Fantasy Island, I would have suggested that one of the episodes be like this. Expecting a very important dignitary today. His name is Mr. Isbell. Oh, you mean Jay is coming here to the island today, boss? That is right, Tattoo. Jay himself will be here. Oh, look. There it is, boss, the plane, the plane. Here comes Jay. There it is, boss, it's Jay. This is a great looking place. Welcome, Mr. Isabel, to the Fantasy Island. Thank you. It's wonderful to be here. Now, as you know, Mr. Isabel... It's Isabel. It's pronounced...
Just Isabel. People make that mistake all the time. They call me Isabel, but it's Isabel. Did you say it's just Isabel? That does not make sense. Isabel sounds more right. I understand, but it's just Isabel. Little Mackey. Well, what is your fantasy? Come here, Rourke. My fantasy is that in the future, they invent something called the internets. And they got something called Twitters, all right? Here's how the Twitters works. You can send a picture of your dong somewhere. You're a fantasy. It is. It isn't. It isn't. That's coming. What it is, is if I send a picture like that, my wife, she's all in on it.
Mr. Isbell, we cannot do this fantasy. Why the hell not? Well, because if you read the stipulations as you came to Fantasy Island, Fantasy Island only grants fantasies that are good. That's good. That's right. I know this is breaking the rules because it's great. It ain't just good, it's great. I know it's breaking the rules, but you got to do something for me here. That's my fantasy. I paid. I didn't pay. I got Adam, our promotional director, to trade this trip out. But we paid for this trip here to Fantasy Island. I need this. Get it done. Hit me. Hit me. Hit me. Okay. We got more Wiener audio. Yeah. Still got to tell you what's going on with USC. Huge news with USC. And wait till I play you the voicemail that a movie theater in Texas got. An angry voicemail. It's up there with the top ever. 94.9. At CarMax, we know honesty is the key to providing great customer service. However, we also understand that there are times when you're better off not being honest. For instance, if your aunt asks you if you can attend her one-woman show, For the Love of Sheila, you might want to say you already had plans.
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Got some backup from the 67 to 3rd Street, that westbound side of the 78. That's pretty slow between 3rd and the 15. This report also brought to you by British Airways. They now fly nonstop to London from San Diego. That means you're going to spend more time in London, less time waiting to get there. For schedules and fares, visit BA.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. If being nude at your home. Is a nudist. I'm a nudist. Lauren. I did a lot of reading last night. Weird. Woods. I am the grill master. I can grill anything. Sienna. I'm not the neatest person in my house. Todd's definitely more neat than I am, but I wouldn't say I'm a slob. And Jay. I'll come over and help you cut a trench of concrete. On FM 94.9. I can show that makes you an M1. We call ourselves M1 Nation or the M1 Army. Yeah. Either way, you are either with us or you are against us. I want to say that again just so we're clear. You are either with us or you are against us. You're an M1. Number for M1 Nation. 570-1949. Our text number 949mikey at gmail.com. We're going to play you the angry voicemail that came into a movie theater. We're also going to...
We're also going to be talking about what happened with USC, which is pretty big news. Thank you to everybody going out to Indy Jam, making this radio station's Indy Jam one of the best ever. Cool. Yes, sir. Oh, yeah. Out at Oceanside, this thing, it was great. It was really great. Jay, what was your favorite band? I liked the Soft Pack and then, well, it's hard to say, Surfer. Surf and Blow was really good too. Somebody wrote me and said Soft Pack was amazing. They were amazing. Got a great little tidbit on Indie Jam from Woods' recap. Oh. And Jay. Oh boy. Brace yourselves. Woods got to see something at Indie Jam that solidified Jay's reputation as one of the most frugal men on earth. True. He witnessed Jay in cooperation with his wife, Kim, taking plates of food from the VIP area for his daughter's Liberty, Jasper, well, his daughter Liberty and Maddie, and then his son, Jasper. That's right. Now, he also, Woods, also saw them stopped by security the first time they did it.
And then took a photograph as Kim covered the plates in a sweatshirt and shoved them in her purse. Got to feed the kids. Hey, listen. You got to make ends meet. You got to feed your family. Sometimes things happen that are not the most desirable. You're stealing, though. Hey. I'm not stealing. I'm giving the food away for free. I'm feeding a family. All right? I'm feeding. You're giving the food away for free, Jay, for the people that are there. That's right. You know what I'm saying. That paid to get those tickets. Don't get the milk if you can feed the cow for free. The VIP area is for free. Then why did you have to hide the food? That's my question. Why wouldn't you just walk out with it? Because they wouldn't let you. Because you're stealing. Well, listen. You know what? Rob from the rich. One man stealing. Oh, my gosh. You're stationed. You're stationed. Hey, y'all. First of all, you can shove it. Second, y'all don't understand because you don't have four kids.
It ain't easy these days. Making ends meet. I got a million different businesses I'm working on. My modeling career ain't doing much right now because we ain't in season. Trying to sell my business to my son, Jasper. He's eight. And he can't afford it. And I ain't going to give it to him. Plus, I'm suing Kim right now. That's a problem. My wife. My wife, Kim. So that's soaking up a lot of my resources. You guys. It was tacos and it was beans and rice. Oh, my God. So they put one plate over the other. Yeah. You know, they tried to walk out. The guy goes, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Where are you going? Where are you going? You almost made it. They go back. Oh, sorry, sorry. They're sitting there and they're scheming. They're like, can we drop it down? Can you go down? Maybe we can get it down on here. Is there a ledge? Oh, my God. Is there a ledge we can put it on? I'll build a pulley. I'll build a pulley. And Kim put it in her purse, and I was like, you know you have rice and beans in your purse right now. There's no way it's staying. It worked out really well. Didn't happen. Next time I'm bringing Ziploc bags. Oh, my. You've never walked out of the VIP with a beer in your hand? Uh-uh. I won't let you. Yeah, yeah, you can. But it's one thing if it's your beer. Yes, I work at the radio station. It was so awesome. Oh, my gosh. It was so awesome. All right, so let me play you this audio. This is an angry theater goer in Austin, Texas.
who went to the movie theater and they told her you're out of here she was texting during the movie or whatever now you guys have heard me talk before about how i feel like we're living like we live in an era where and i don't know that this person's a teenager they sound like a teenager maybe they're not a teenager young person this girl is a young person all i'm saying is our Phone screener Chris is 22, right? 22. Very different for his generation. He feels everything that he gets, he's lucky for, which is the way that I was raised. He doesn't feel like he's entitled to anything, which is so different for a kid his age. But I want you to listen to this voicemail from this chick and tell me what you think. Yeah, I was wondering if you guys actually enjoy treating your customers like a piece of s***.
Because that's how I felt. How old do you think she is? I'm going to go around the room. Woods? 16. L-O-B? 20. Sienna? 19. What do you think, Jay? I think about 22. Okay, so the average here is about 20. We're all, you know, because I thought she was a teenager. I would have said 17. But let's take the average. She's 19, 20, because I don't know. When I went to the Alamo Draft House, okay, you know what? I didn't know that I wasn't supposed to text in your little crappy ass theater. It was too f***ing. dark in that place for me to find my seat, alright? I was using my phone as a flashlight to get to my seat. So excuse me for using my phone in USA, United States of America, where you are free to text in a theater. I was not... Are you? I don't think you are free to text in a theater. I don't think you're free to talk on your phone in a theater. I don't think you're free to bake in a theater. I don't think you're free to eat green eggs and ham in a theater. I think you're free to watch a freaking movie. You're free to, but you're a D if you do. Yes. Yes. No, no, no. I don't think you are, bro. You're not going to arrest you. You're not going to arrest you, but there's a rule. And the rule is don't watch it. Yeah, or we'll toss you. Yeah.
Where's that rule? I've never seen it. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I suspect something. I suspect. You tell me. But I suspect you feel that rule is too harsh. No. You do not? No. Hell no. I don't want some clown on their phone. Is it too harsh to kick someone out if they're texting? Yes. Oh, you're crazy. So distracting. I believe, yeah, it's distracting. But to kick them out, just go up to them and be like, hey, you know, we're getting some complaints. Can you turn your phone off? Yeah, understandable. That's distracting as well, though. Kicking them out is even more distracting. No, it's not. They're doomed. They're gone. Oh, no. Do we not? Sienna. What? Don't we all know? Yeah, don't do it. I don't do it. Right, but don't we all know? So, in other words, you're saying, hey, listen, go up to him and say, don't do it. I'm saying, I think we've all got the memo on that one. We all have been here. But where are the signs? No one knows that. It says it right before the movie. It says, please put your phones and turn off your texting. No texting during the movie. It doesn't say no texting. It does. I think it does. It does. I think it does. 100%. And not only that, our nanny's from Hungary. She knows. All I know when I go to the movies is it plays that annoying thing with the babies crying. It's like, all right, please don't add your own soundtrack to the movie. That bit. It doesn't say anything about texting. I think it does. That's all it says.
All right, let's keep listening. I so badly want to hear a door open in the background and hear a father go, what did you just say? What did you just say? Did you just say the F word? And then I want, if she's under 18, I want the father to spank her. And I don't care if she's 16. I want him. With the palm of his hand right on her butt as hard as to where she's crying. And that's what I want. And that's what we don't have enough of. That's why we get these little brats. Are you kidding me? Something tells me this girl's over 21. Maybe. You know why? I still want her spanked. Because the name of the place she went is the Alamo Drafthouse, which I think is where you get beer. Beer and a movie. Beer and a movie. I'm looking at it right now, and I think it's over 21. So I think she's over 21. Still. I still say, well, the problem then was before she turned 18. Yeah. I was doing my phone, all right? Oh, wow. And it was on silent. And it is the generation. Again, it's the generation. And there may be some of you that are listening that are in that early 20s age that you say, hey, that ain't me, buddy. To which I say, that's rad. Yeah.
That's awesome. But there are some people that go, wait a minute. I've been taught since I was a little kid that if I come in third place, fourth place, or fifth place, I get a trophy. Yeah. I've been taught that. Yeah. I've also been taught that every poop that I take is like a joyful experience and that we should celebrate. Absolutely. I've also been taught that everything I do, no matter what, is wonderful. Yes. is significant, that I'm significant, and that before anything else, my personal satisfaction comes first. I've been taught that. I wish that I could do a case study on her. Here's something else, okay?
About this girl. We'll call her that girl. Here's something else about that girl. It could be that guy. She could very easily go. Right dad. Because my guess is. That dad has supported. No matter what. All through life dad has got. Or right mom. And mom and dad might a little bit be like. Well the language is a little much. But yes. I don't agree with the language. Cynthia or Patricia or whatever. But yes, you're absolutely right. This is something that parents now and a lot of times, by the way, that comes from guilt. A lot of times that comes from guilt. I was talking about this last week. You see a lot of guilty parents. I was a D dad. I wasn't around. So now I'm going to make up for it by whatever my kid does is OK. I'll always support them. You don't always support.
If it's bad behavior, you can't support. If it's good, I think we have a wrong idea of what support looks like. Support means no matter what happens, I will say I'm behind you. No, that's not what it always means. Sometimes it means when you mess up, I'm going to get on you. But she has princess around her license plate. That is true. She should be treated like a princess, right? And her necklace. And the pants that she's wearing across her butt. Yep. She should be treated as such. Her license plate says daddy's girl on it. Daddy's GRL. Her Mustang. Her BMW. Her BMW. Now, dad is able to somehow justify the BMW. Because it's an older model BMW. I wouldn't buy her a brand new BMW. It's a 2007. I'm not an idiot. I'm not an idiot. She's not spoiled. I wouldn't be caught dead in a 2007 BMW. I wouldn't drive a 2007. That's why I gave it to the girl. That's right.
So I gave it to her. I put the personalized plate on that said daddy's girl on it. So everybody would know. D-D-Z-G-R-L. Right. D-D-C. Coming back to your Alamo draft house or whatever, I'd rather go to a regular theater where people are actually polite. And, you know, I'm going to tell everyone about how the f*** you are. And I'm pretty sure. Define everyone. Let's see. Stacy. Melinda. Brie. Brie. Tracy. Bridget. All my Twitter followers. Ashley. Let's see. Brandon. Katie. Katie. You guys would be on purpose. So thanks for making me feel like a customer. Thanks for taking my money. Maybe she had a few pops. Sounds like it. Sounds like she may have had a couple of pops. I've been to every theater in town and treated every person like before. That's right. I just be allowed to do what I want. It's people like you in the United States of America that are making it mess up. Texas, this state. The great state, Texas. Woods, USC. Now, for a Notre Dame guy like you, this ain't bad news. What happened? They were actually stripped of their 2004 national championship by the BCS. They were stripped of it yesterday.
Yeah, so they had the, this is all fallout from Reggie Bush, taking improper benefits while he played, so therefore he's ineligible when he played, therefore they wouldn't have won the national championship without him. This is BCS Executive Director Bill Hancock, cut two. Our group had a procedure to go through and followed the procedure to the letter. Basically, you know, the BCS is not an investigative body, and so we wait until the NCAA finishes with its... Vacated. So now there's nobody listed as a national champion from 2008. 2004. 2004. Blank. Weird. We have got Bush. Thank you. It's Reggie Bush. It's Reggie Bush. Way to go, Reg. Sienna was at Bed Bath & Beyond getting some new bedding, and you know that her husband wasn't with her. Why? Because her husband does not care for things like this. A lot of men may find the following a little odd. She was buying pillows. This is a Sienna thing, okay? More than anyone I know, Sienna is a test driver. Buying a mattress, test drive it. Buying a car, test drive it. You're buying something, test it.
How's it work? Does it work for me? Okay. So she's getting pillows. And to be sure that she was getting the right and best pillows, she lied on the hard floor of Bed Bath & Beyond and tested all of them. I did. You've done it. It's the best. You have to. Filthy floor. Filthy. Hard, uncomfortable. And I first... Got the pillow and like just, you know, light it like kind of my shoulder while I was standing. And I was like, this is not good enough. This is not good enough. Exactly. So then I looked around and I was like, well, it's very crowded in here. But oh, well, light them all down in a row and just rolled over. That's fantastic. That's fantastic. Got some good ones, too. You got the right ones. Yeah. More people should do it. I should do it. I did it at Target. Same thing. I was like, oh. I have some complaints. Yeah, the plastic. Yeah, the plastic around it. It's in the plastic. It was hard to tell. Your face is up against that. Oh, no. I don't know about this. It's good. It's good. Babe, do you like this one? Hold on. Try this one. I don't know. It feels so... I can't really tell, babe, what the thing. Well, lay down. I am, but it's uncomfortable because of the plastic. Mikey, put your hat on that pillow. All right. Oh, it's so...
It's uncomfortable. Makes me think of potato chips. I would have never been able to do it if anyone was with me. Todd would have said, no, get up, get up. Couldn't have done it holding sage, you know. From Jay's recap. I guess I officially have the bike racing bug again. Exclamation point. Let me tell you, I was so nervous Friday night and then... Saturday morning, my stomach was just a nap. But once that race that I was in started, I began to settle in and get into a groove. Our team got third in the salty dog category. It's a four-man team with a combined age of over 180. Nice. I'm a little banged up. The legs are a little sore, but...
After it's all over, it was a great way to spend the weekend. Oh, boy. How about you, Woods? How about you next? It's a perfect town. Just want to say thank you to all the people who run the 12 Hours of Temecula race. Hats off. What better place to thank them than Eureka? Hey, there's a ton of M1s out there. Maybe on Facebook. I did. You all do such an incredible job. Something only Mike reads. Yeah, there you go. You just read it on the air. Hey, by the way, I don't know if I mentioned it. It ain't five hours of Temecula. Twelve. Twelve. That's half a day. It ain't two hours of Temecula, which, by the way, would have sounded better. Two hours of Temecula. Right. Two Temecula. Two Teme... Would have sounded better. No. It's 12 hours of Temecula, y'all. Y'all. Twelve full hours of energy, speed, endurance.
It's more than you work out for a whole year. That's right, Mike. You add up all your workouts over a year, you ain't doing 12 hours of nothing. Maybe 12 hours of cheesecake. I feel as though that was directed at Woods. I wasn't saying anything at the time, but... Exactly. Okay. Wood's just sitting there, you know. Just sitting here listening. Just listening. And boom goes the dynamite. Just being a good friend. Just being a good pal, supporting you. Let him his shoulder to cry on. Yeah. I texted Jay and told him good luck. Oh, you were so nice. It was a really, really good job. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, Jay probably texted back, don't need luck. Yeah. Luck don't have nothing to do with it. These legs ain't going to fail me, Wood. You know that. That's right. Wood. So, yesterday. Apple did something called the WWDC, the World Wide... I don't know. I don't know what it stands for. But anyway, Apple does it every year. They unveil something new. And I went to their website, and if you don't know, I'm a big Apple guy. I love Apple products. So much so that I have an iSpring, which is what you just heard. It's a spring. Spring-loaded spring. I have an iBoard.
Which is a diving board. Anyhow, this was supposed to be a big deal because Steve Jobs was going to get up and actually present. And as you know, he's in terrible health. And so I was trying to find, I wanted to stream it live. And it wasn't on their website. So I went on Google and I just typed in, streaming WWC 2011. And I found these two British kids. In their houses with headphones and a microphone. And this is like right before 10 o'clock when it's supposed to start. And they're like, we're trying. We're trying to get this in. Hang on a second. Brian, have you got... Hang on a second, Ian. You're talking while I'm... You're talking while I'm trying. Don't. Stop it. These are two friends in separate locations communicating with one another, trying to find a stream of this thing.
When we come back, I'll tell you what happened. Maybe one of the most delicious things I've ever... I couldn't tune out. I couldn't tune out. And what they were trying to do was find an illegal stream of said conference. It was... There was nothing like it. And what very famous person once told Larry King that he had bad breath? Told him. You have bad breath. Very famous person. It probably won't surprise you. When you hear it, you'll go, yeah, I could see that person doing that. We'll tell you next. How's our chance? Let's do it. More from the Mikey Show coming up. Be a part of the show. I don't think it's that simple. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm beginning to like the sound of that. Life's better with baseball.
And the 2011 season rolls on with more than 145 live Padre games exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego. And then, join John Weisbarth, Jenny Kavnar, and me, Bob Scanlon, for the Saquon Casino postgame show. And as always, be sure to like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter all season long. The Padres are live as they host the Rockies, 6.30 Tuesday. From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse, go behind the headlines and sports pages. And get to know the real people who don the Padres' uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego. There's a rumor that San Diego is home to one of the most brilliant, insightful, and educational culinary TV shows ever created. And then, there's my show. But it's big in taste and small in effort. Sam the Cooking Guy, Sundays at 5.30 and 7 p.m., only on Channel 4 San Diego.
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Hey guys, this is LOB. Summer's almost here, which means that San Diego County Fair is almost in town. This year, the Ovation Cell Therapy team of hair care consultants will be at the fair with a huge booth in the Bing Crosby Hall. They're going to have lots of Ovation hair care products, including the new Men's Max Pack, which is just in time for Father's Day. This is a great gift idea for the dads in your life. Ovation works on all hair types, helping to grow hair thicker, longer, stronger, and healthier, guaranteed. So go ahead and surprise your dad this Father's Day with a gift he's going to actually use. Give him this new Men's Max Pack from Ovation and receive a special Ovation Fair discount. And with this special Ovation Fair savings, why not give yourself the Ovation Cell Therapy System too? So get out to the San Diego County Fair this year. Look for the Ovation booth in the Bing Crosby Hall. Or log on to OvationHair.com and don't forget to put in FM949 at checkout. That's OvationHair.com and put in FM949 at checkout. This is the sound of Becky using a deposit-friendly ATM from Chase. So I just push the deposit checks button and slide these checks right in the slot.
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Frank's Red Hot Sauce goes on anything. Its aged cayenne peppers add real flavor to jambalaya, ribs, collard greens, steaks, fries, sausage, onion rings, crab legs, chicken, chili, and even prized pumpkins. Frank's Red Hot Sauce. I put that s*** on everything. Okay, honey, I booked a great hotel on Expedia, and we got a $50 prepaid MasterCard gas card. Fifty bucks? Woo-hoo! See if the neighbors can beat that. Bucks and gas! How you like me now? Hey! Anderson. Yeah, well, blow your lawn. Oh, you should, hon. Get a $50 prepaid MasterCard gas card when you book with your MasterCard during Expedia's My Summer is Better Than Your Summer Sale. Where you book matters. Expedia. Minimum stay required and subject to availability. Book by July 4th. Travel by August 31st. Terms and restrictions apply. See site for full details. A blown tire. Overheated engine. Empty gas tank. There's mayhem on the road. That's why you need roadside assistance. What you don't need is to pay a fee even if you don't use it. Introducing Good Hands Roadside Assistance from Allstate. You'll never pay a dime unless you use it. And it's open to everyone, not just Allstate customers. Go to allstate.com slash roadside to register and get important information. Prepare for an adventurous career by earning a professional certificate in marine technology from National University Polytechnic Institute. Available specializations include advanced dive medicine.
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On the 8 westbound ramp to the 805 northbound, there's a car on the connecting road. Also, the 78 westbound College Boulevard, an accident. It's on the on-ramp, and it looks like you've got to be pretty careful entering westbound 78 at College. Caltrans is on the way. They're mopping up a bunch of oil that was spilled there. 15 southbound in Escondido after Deer Springs Road. We've got chunks of tire tread all across lanes. There's a box truck with a flat tire over on that right shoulder, too. This report brought to you by Brandman University, part of the Chapman University system. a non-profit school focused on working adults. Visit brandman.edu to learn more. Brandman University, do better. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Signature fragrance. Lauren. When I was in my performing troupe of Two Mermaids, me and my sister, we once performed at a farmer's market. Woods. Pink is the new wine. Sienna. It makes me really sad when someone hogs me. Like, for the whole day. And Jay. I'm not afraid of rats. I had a pet rat. On FM 94.9. All right, so I'll tell you about the big announcement yesterday from Apple. I'll tell you about these British kids that I saw. I'll tell you about...
Who told Larry King that he had bad breath? Sienna, what's going on in the news? Well, yesterday was the first court appearance for the former International Monetary Fund head, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, and he pleaded not guilty to the charges that he sexually assaulted and tried to rape a maid in a hotel in Manhattan on May 14th. Also, an update on the Casey Anthony trial. Casey Anthony, the 25-year-old who is facing seven counts in the death of her two-year-old daughter, Kaylee. Well, a scientist testified yesterday, and he tested carpet samples from the trunk of her Pontiac Sunfire, which rumor has it Kaylee was in there for 31 days or however long. He also tested a spare tire cover, scrapings from the wheel well, and some other things. And he said, you know, with observations and the tests that he and his team made, he believed there was, in fact, a dead body in the trunk. Yeah, I saw a lot of it. And it's pretty compelling stuff. Yeah. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Sports is brought to us today by our friends at Frank's Red Hot. Frank's Red Hot. Get some! Yeah, well, the three-game winning streak at Petco Park is over. The Padres were shut out again last night. Three to nothing to the Rockies. It was their first chance to get out of the cellar since May 17th. Tenth shutout of the season, and they're seventh at home. So maybe we move those fences in. But some good news is Brad Hopp actually got a start in right field last night, which opens the door at first base for...
heavy-hitting prospect Anthony Rizzo to get called up. Reports are he'll be in town tomorrow. Really? Which would be awesome. Everybody wants to see this kid play. Yeah, I remember when that guy was drafted and they said that he was eventually going to be a big hitter. Yeah, he was part of the Gonzalez deal that we got for Adrian. Also, it was an absolute blowout in Boston last night. The Bruins beat the Canucks 8-1 in Game 3 of the Stanley Cup Finals. And Vancouver leads 2-1. This just in, the NFL's still in a labor dispute. Yes, still in a labor dispute. Yep. Let's see. By the way, yeah, I just read this. Representative Weiner has admitted to six women that he... Inappropriate contact with six women. That he had inappropriate contact with six women. Which means 12. Oh, boy. Which means 28. Right. Exactly. As a joke, though. As a joke. All as a joke. I was kidding. It's just a bit. Isn't that hysterical? My last name's Wiener. I was just trying to perpetuate. Yeah, why don't people get it? What's the matter with you people? I was joking. Don't you know a joke when you hear one? Okay. Look into that. We got plenty. I have so much Wiener audio that I haven't got to yet. So does John. So yesterday was the big, you know, annual.
What's new? What does Apple have that's new? So I wanted to see this conference live on my laptop. But Apple wasn't broadcasting it. So I searched for it and found these two British kids on Ustream. And the two of these kids, and when I say kids, I mean they were probably 17 or 18. Anywhere between 17 and 19 years old. Two of them, good buddies, separate locations. And by the way, so you know, these are those kids that know everything about the Internet, meaning there isn't one thing they don't know. Meaning that if you presented some obscure thing about the Internet, they would go, I know that. I know it already. You're never going to tell them something they don't. And I'm being serious. Like, they know everything.
So I'm watching these two furiously finding a feed. Now I'm thinking in my head, how can they find a feed? It's impossible. They're not showing it. Well, there were people sitting in the audience with their iPhones that were doing this. And so they would go, the two of them, it was as if it was a 9-11 broadcast in terms of like the intensity. And it was like breaking news type of thing. all of a sudden you would lose the feed and one of them would go, all right, all right, all right. I think we've lost it. Hang on. I'm checking. I'm checking, Peter. I'm checking. Hang on. He's been caught. He's been caught. The person that was broadcasting it has been caught. Are you sure? Then you hear furious typing and you would go, I'm waiting for confirmation. Yes, he's been caught.
He's been called. Don't worry. I know. And they're getting like people are commenting, like typing and commenting like a chat room. And he would go, I know, Rose, we're trying. I'm not trying to keep this information from anyone. So mad. They were so mad and so serious. And I'm like, I'm glued to this. And I'm like. If my house got on fire right now, I don't think I could leave. I'd run out with my laptop to watch these two kids. And then they would go, they would go, I think we got, are you sure we have someone else? Don't say it until you know. I think I do. I've got it. All right. Oh, this is the same person from last year. This is the same person from last year. It's just, wait a minute. I think it's just audio. And then his friend would go, I don't care. I don't care. Roll it. Roll it. Roll it. Roll it. Roll it. I need it. Oh, my gosh. Oh, boy. And so then you would hear Steve Jobs talking. The devices have changed. All right. Yeah, it's audio. It is audio. Let it go. Let it go. Don't talk. Shut up. Peter, shut up. It's freaking incredible. It was the greatest thing I'd ever seen.
Anyway, so what did Steve Jobs say? By the way, Steve Jobs looked gaunt. He looked like he weighed about 98 pounds. Jealous? Worried is more like it. Y'all jealous? Mikey, you haven't weighed 98 pounds since you were four months old. Since you were born. Weren't you the first 98 pound Mexican baby born in Gilroy? Yes, well, yesterday they did the unveiling of their new iCloud storage system. Now, we talked about this a little bit on Friday, but now all the details are out. The new iCloud is a music streaming service, and basically it's just going to let users play their stored music and be able to get access to their stored data from any Apple device. They also introduced was a $25 a year service called iTunes Match, which will let scan users. Can I explain it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'll know. I'll put it in layman's terms. I'll put it in layman's terms. What that $25 a year thing is. What's it called? iTunes match. iTunes match. OK, so you got a library and you burned a lot of music onto your iTunes library from your own personal CD collection. Yes. OK, what they will do is, is that they will effectively replace the music that you've.
Download it on your own with better sounding music. You're kidding. The same thing, but better sounding. So when I first moved here, I didn't have really a home or anything to do. So I would take 50 CDs from Garrett's office. I'd sit in a cube and I'd burn CDs all day. So if I sign up for this, they're going to replace those songs with better. With a better class of recording. That's awesome. Yeah. And everybody that owns a Mac now. Everybody that owns a Mac will buy a song on their phone. And when they get home, it'll be in their library and their computer at home or on their laptop. Shut it. I got another cool thing. There's another cool couple features things. They're also releasing their new operating system. Their operating systems are always named after cats. OK, like currently it's Snow Leopard, but they're moving to one called Lion. And this new operating system is pretty cool. Steve Jobs and the people at Apple clearly feel that the direction that the world is going is apps. And they've made apps available for your actual laptops now. So you don't just have apps on your phone, you have them on your laptop. You mean appetizers, Mike? That must mean what you mean, Mike. Mozzarella sticks. Mike, haven't you had enough apps?
Just wait for the damn entree. And don't get any dessert. I think you had enough apps. I think you apped out, pal. I think you've used all your app time. You ain't going to get a king-size app. That's one of the big samplers. It's got potato skins, mozzarella sticks, wings. Enough apps, buddy. Unless it's carrots. Carrots and celery. Feel free to mix in a carrot or celery app, Mike. Gosh darn with all them bacon-wrapped apps. Chips and salsa. Enough. Guacamole. How much can one human's stomach hold? So anyway, what will this thing do? It's going to do... plenty you're gonna love this so uh yeah first of all all your music goes to wherever you want so you download it once and it's it's on your computer you put something in your calendar it's on all your calendars you put something in uh uh you put something in uh an app you download an app it's now on all your computers so how does one get lion ah woods i was sitting here in my head and i was like what is this big thing i'm forgetting what am i forgetting
How do you get the new operating system? There's only one way you can get it. Don't say I got to go buy a new laptop. No. The only way that you can get it is the App Store, which is great, which means you don't drive to the store anymore. Wow. You don't go get a disc. You don't wait for it to come in the mail. You don't do that anymore. Instant. It's instant. It's $29.95. It's going to be available in July. And the only place you can get it is the iTunes App Store. Wow. $29.95? $29.95. That's awesome. Yeah. And they were showing, you know, because right now Amazon and Google have this thing that allows you to do the same deal with your music. You buy a piece of music here, you have it everywhere. They are doing something similar. And it costs $250 to be able to do it. Apple's cost $25. Wow. So if I buy the Lion, do I get the other stuff with it or I got to buy it separately? Oh, you get it. You buy Lion, you get that iCloud. Why would you buy it? Oh, yeah. iTunes Max. In fact, Woods, yes, you do. I'm actually thinking you might not even have to, but I believe you do. I believe you do have to have Lion to make the cloud work and all that stuff. That's so cool, man. Gosh darn, that's easy. It's great. It's really great. All of your stuff just got better. You know, they do good stuff.
M1, Brian from Poway. What was the word of the day? That's correct. Labor. Got a four-pack of tickets to the fair and Sunday brunch at Vigalucci. So you're going to be eating a lot of cool stuff. Perfect. Hang on a line. Let me do any grilling out this season. It's starting. Who told Larry King he had bad breath? It was a celebrity. It was a famous person. Who told him? This is Larry King telling the story. You've pretty much interviewed almost every celebrity out there. So if I throw some names out, will you tell us either a quick story or something about the time that they spent Donald Trump? Donald Trump, first he let me pull his hair. I did that too. I did that too. And then once he said, don't get too close, you have bad breath. Oh, wow. He likes his personal space though, right? He said that to you? That's so rude. But he said he didn't mean it the way it sounded. What did he mean?
Stock annuities. But the way it came out was, you have bad breath. You stink. I don't know what he meant. He actually meant to say you have B.O. Is that it? I appeared on his roast. They've asked to roast me. I've declined. I worry. I drink so much coffee, I worry about my coffee breath. Yeah, me too. Me too. Blast and cigs are real good. Copenhagen. I don't notice it. If you have bad breath, I don't notice. You can tell me. I don't. You don't? You could tell me. Tiana, you would tell me. I would tell you. Tiana would tell me. Would you? Yeah. Would you tell me? Yes. You would tell? Yeah. I would tell all of you. Thank you. I feel I can move on. All right, let's do this. Gas price is right. So you know, the median price of gas in San Diego is $4. It's the average price. In fact, you can find gas in San Diego now for $3.99. Probably $4. Even cheaper than that in some areas, but the good news is that it's gone below $4 for the first time. But the median price, average, $4. It's good. 570-1949. Here's how the gas price is right works. I'm going to give you five items from a convenience store, and you've got to tell me if they are more or less than $4, the median price of gas. And if you're right, then three out of five,
Then you're a winner. What did they win today, Jay? Today they win a pair of tickets to the San Diego County Fair. There you go. 570-1949. Let's play the gas prices right. This is M1 Tammy from Vista. Hi, Tammy. Hi. How you doing? Good. Great. All right. Now, you know that the price is $4. All you got to do to win this is get three out of five. You got to tell me higher or lower. Are you ready? Okay. All right. Here we go. The first item is. One pair of Children's Curious George flip-flops. Is that more or less than $4? That's correct. $2.99. $2.99 for a pair of Children's Curious George flip-flops. All right, how about this? Maxim's Hot 100 Edition magazine. Maxim's Hot 100 Edition magazine. Is that more or less than $4? You're good at this. You're good. $5.99 for Maxim's Hot 100 Edition magazine. How about this one? $4 the magic price. A 57-watt soft light bulb. Is that more or less than $4? Wow. A winner. $2.19. Very well done. Easy. Big time. Just won yourself a pair of tickets to the fair. Hang on. I would be terrible at that game. Me too. M1 P-Dog from San Diego. How are you? Doing great.
All right, bro, you ready? Yeah, let's do it. Half gallon of silk soy milk. A half gallon of silk soy milk. Is that more or less than $4? You know what? You're going to kill yourself when you hear this. $3.99. It's one penny less than $4. Don't worry, you still have four more chances. How about a small bag of Purina dog food? A small bag of Purina dog food, is that more or less than $4? That is correct. $6.49. You need to get two more right, and you have three chances. One regular bag of baked lathes, more or less than $3.99. Or excuse me, $4. Yes, less. In fact, that's another item that is exactly $3.99, but you got it right.
Only need one more, and you win a pair of tickets to the fair. Pepperidge Farm soft-baked oatmeal raisin cookies. Is that more or less than $4? You are correct. We're all done. Got two winners, and the gas price is right. You're going to the fair. Hang on the line. That was M1 P-Dog. Well done. Wow. Okay. So, apparently, the governor of Florida, and this is going to be a big debate. We're going to have to debate this. 570-1949. Apparently, the governor of Florida would like to require that welfare recipients take a drug test. He would like to require that welfare recipients take a drug test. I have absolutely no problem with that. The only people that have to worry about taking a drug test are people that do drugs. It's the same reason that I don't care if there's a black box in my car.
The only people that have anything to fear with a black box in their car are people that are doing bad things, which, by the way, includes me because I was speeding, you know. And if anything, I think it's a good deterrent. I go, oh, man, I got a black box in my car. I better mind my P's and Q's. So the Florida governor is saying if you're on welfare in this state, you can't be doing drugs. I don't think anybody in the world thinks that anybody should be doing drugs if they're taking money from the system. Because if they're taking money from the system, what are they using the money for? apparently to buy drugs. Nobody's for that. Now, what I think I'd be interested in is why it's a bad idea. It's a benefit. In order to take a benefit, this is the requirement. You don't have to take the benefit. You don't have to take a drug test. You don't get the benefit. Yeah, well, the governor of Florida, his name is Rick Scott, and he...
is doing exactly what Mike just said. He actually told CNN on Sunday, it's not right for taxpayer money to be paying for someone's drug addiction. We shouldn't be subsidizing people's addiction. But the ACLU of Florida disagrees. They've already filed a suit against the governor. They say that what Scott is doing is giving ugly legitimacy to an unfortunate stereotype that has been in this country for a couple of decades that all welfare recipients are a bunch of drug abusers. So prove it wrong. Right. But that's their... counter that's their counter yeah please yeah prove it wrong anybody have a problem with it no no no jay you got a problem with it no i just you know i hate the fact that we have to test them for you know drugs but just just because it's it seems like it's a part of their their freedom you know it's like once again they're getting into their business but you're right they don't have to take the benefit if they don't want to you guys we all work here at lincoln financial Didn't we all take a drug test to work here? We all passed it or we wouldn't be here. If we hadn't passed it, what would have happened to us? We wouldn't have got hired. Seems fair. Seems fair to me. Yeah. There's ways around drug tests anyway, though. Well, sure. Sure, there are ways around drug tests. There's no question. But to not test, I mean, to test them is a great, great idea. I got the Wizenator. I invented the Wizenator. I invented the Wizenator. It's modeled after my wiener.
If we're being honest. If we're just putting it all out there. If we're putting everything out, all our cards, that's me. They needed a mold, and I gave them the mold. That's actually why my test took so long to come back. They were like, what is this? I've never seen urine like this. It's so pure. It's incredible. It's pure. It's like Avion. Yeah. It's like Avion. I'm dealing with fools and trolls. A huge star just came out and slammed. Women that make sex tapes that are famous and women that make sex, take nudie pictures. Will you be surprised to find out who this was? Also, how much do you think guys spend on women while they're dating before they get married? How much the average guys spend on women before they get married? Just dating them. I have an actual figure for you. I'll tell you what it is next. It's the Mikey Show on FM 94.9.
The Ultimate Fighting Championship presents UFC 131. When size meets size, speed meets speed, and power meets power. Only one thing will matter. Who lands first? 22 combined first round finishes and 12 total knockouts. Junior Dos Santos. Shane Carwin. And the first man to ever fight in four different weight classes. Kenny Florian makes his featherweight debut against 16-1 Diego Nunez. While Brazilian jiu-jitsu black belt Damian Maia takes on the Filipino wrecking machine Mark Munoz. UFC personal trainer presents UFC 131. Dos Santos versus Carwin. Live this Saturday night only on pay-per-view. Visit UFC.com for details. Order by using your Cox remote control by tuning into channel 501 or in HD on channel 798 after 5.30 p.m. on Saturday. Enjoy the fight. Here's the thing. AIS is saving you money, and everybody wants to save money. 800-777-4AIS. You know, if you have heard me make the comments about AIS over the years and haven't called, now's the time. 1-800-777-4247. It doesn't take long.
It's very quick, painless, easy. A lot of people don't do it and procrastinate because they think it takes a long time. It doesn't. Did you say save money? Yes, I did, Jay. Well, I want to save money. Of course you do. Don't you realize that right now, Jay, you're probably throwing that money away? Hey, listen. Hit me. Yeah, I'll help you. I need the number. 800-777-4247. An easier way for you to remember it, Jay, is 1-800-777-4AIS. I'm going to write it on my hand. That's fine. All right. You know who did that? Who? Memento. What's that? Forget it. You will. 800-777-4AIS. Every 6.4 minutes, a Lexus certified pre-owned car is sold. That's about how long it takes you to toss back your espresso macchiato. Why so fast? Because right now at our 60 to 0 certified pre-owned sales event, we're offering 1.9% APR financing on every certified pre-owned Lexus. All meticulously inspected, factory-backed, with a three-year, 100,000-mile warranty. So you know that special Lexus you've had your eye on? Well, better hurry. By the time you finish those 20 whole-grain macrobiotic rice cakes, it could be gone. The Lexus 60 to 0 certified pre-owned sales event. Now through August 1st.
At your Lexus dealer in Carlsbad, El Cajon, Escondido, or San Diego. Sales claim based on total annual sales figures. 48 monthly payments of $21.65 per thousand financed. Call 1-800-USA-LEXUS for important APR program limitations and offer details. Only a limited number of customers will qualify. No down payment required if qualified. Warranty is three years from your date of purchase or 100,000 total vehicle miles. See your certified pre-owned Lexus dealer for warranty. Details offer ends August 1st, 2011. If I told you my grandma used to give me mother's cookies, I'd be lying. She didn't exactly give them to me. She was far craftier than that, which is why I loved her. She had this whole method. She'd plant some circus animal cookies on her dresser, and then she'd send me on a decoy mission to go get something for my quote-unquote forgetful old grandmother. Then, to distract Mom, she'd create a diversion. To buy me some time, she'd really milk it, too, so I could pop the cookies in my mouth. and quietly let the pink frosting dissolve on my tongue. It was all kind of genius, or at least I thought it was, until my mom became a grandma herself. A crafty grandma. That's when I realized that mom was in on it all along. Now, so am I. And my daughter thinks the whole thing is just awesome. Cookies. There's a memory in every bite. Fourth and B and the Casbah welcome Punk Rock Legends X. Friday, June 10th.
Tickets on sale now. Call 619-231-4343. Or visit 4thandbeevents.com. Friday, June 10th, 4th and B. Hear the Authentic Surf Report daily at 7.30 a.m., 2.15 p.m., and 8.15 p.m. on FM 94.9. Supported by Frost Brewed Coors Light, the world's most refreshing beer. This report is brought to you by CarMax. Selling your car is easy at CarMax. They'll give you a written offer, good for seven days, whether you buy a car from them or not. CarMax, the way car buying should be. Well, it looks like the 5 southbound, we've got some congestion from Old Town Avenue to Lucadia Boulevard. Also some backup through Escondido on the 15 southbound. Average speed about 20 miles an hour from Center City Parkway to Felicita. And the 805 northbound, pretty much a drag here from Governor Drive to Balboa Avenue. This report brought to you by REMAX. Nobody sells more real estate than REMAX. Find an agent near you at REMAX.com. REMAX, outstanding agents, outstanding results. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM.
It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Good morning to you. This is Bird and Bird Surship. The FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report brought to you by Coors Light. Frost brewed Coors Light. San Diego's number one beer. Coors Brewing Company. Golden, Colorado. Surf-wise today, looking at a little bit of an increase as that southwest pretty swell. 205, 220 degrees. Slowly fills in. Picking up the size considerably since yesterday. Looking at ways to chest size surf on average with pluses on top of that, with the head eye waves being found at those top south-facing areas. Expect some improvement throughout the morning once we get past that low and the tide slowly creeps back up. Not a major tide swing today, but significant enough to make a difference in both size and shape. We are dealing with some residual bump, though, from yesterday's strong winds, so it's not the cleanest conditions out there. And, of course, the summer reef south-facing areas will have your better shape. Each is somewhat walled out, pick and choose corners there, with the lefts being a little bit longer. Occasional short rides, too, and structure areas look okay. It's going to be more about those top stop-facing summaries as the day continues. Right now, clearing up pretty nicely again, and that's about where we're at. So for up-to-the-minute surf report forecast, go to surfline.com. For surfboard restoration and reparation needs, you go see Joe Roper. The authentic surf report can only be heard three times daily, right here on FM 94.9.
This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm the opposite of a football player. Lauren. I love taking care of boyfriends when they're sick. Woods. I do know my way around the jail. Sienna. I like a beer belly. I'm going to tell you that right now. And Jay. Yes, sir. On FM 94.9. Fields Photography. You need a photographer for anything. He's the only guy. Danfieldsphotography.com. We also have his link on the bottom of our homepage at MikeyShow.com. And he's just the most incredible photographer there is. Does basically works of art. And he can be your photographer for a wedding or whatever you got. Dan Fields Photography. So we got to talk about this. Who was...
going after people that have made sex tapes and that kind of stuff, Sienna. Reese Witherspoon, actually. On Sunday night, it was the MTV Movie Awards, and she was accepting her MTV Generation Award. And so she took it upon herself to slam stars who have appeared in sex tapes and any nude photo scandals, telling them that they should basically be ashamed of themselves. Really? Do you have audio, or do you want me to just read you what you said? No, but I do have this PSA from Ryan from The Office. Ever, ever, ever tape yourself having sex. You think you're going to erase it? You say you're going to erase it, but you're not going to erase it. And someone's going to find it. It's just the worst, worst idea you could do. Never, ever tape yourself having sex. I can't stress this enough.
Well, she got up there and she said, I get it, girls, that it's cool to be a bad girl, but it is possible to make it in Hollywood without doing a reality show. When I came up in this business, if you made a sex tape, you were embarrassed and you hid under your bed. You know, basically, obviously, these people are now getting fame like Kim Kardashian after making their sex tape, Paris Hilton. She said, and if you took naked pictures of yourself on your cell phone, you hide your face, people. Hide your face. For all the girls out there, it's totally possible to be a good girl. I'm going to try to make it cool. I wonder if there are young women that are listening. Yeah, me too. God. I can't turn his mic off. I know. Thank God for it. But I wonder if there are any young girls that are listening that wonder, that think to themselves that making a sex tape is a good idea. That they want to. Dude. I think they think it's a...
You know, if you want to be in that type of industry, that's like a step that you can make to really get people's attention and get there quick. When you say industry, you mean reality show industry. No. Hollywood. Acting. Fame. Yeah. If you want to be famous. Cover of Us Weekly. If you want to be famous. Yeah. So there are women, young women that are listening that think, if I want to be famous, if I want to be popular, if I want to be nationally known. a way that I could do it is a sex tape. Now, if you think that, that may be true. What's been proven in this country is that especially if you are an attractive young woman and you make a sex tape, it could lead to fame. It's not necessarily going to lead to fame, but it could lead to fame. Now, that's a true statement. This is also true. You're a whore. Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. If you make a sex tape and you do it with the purpose of gaining recognition, i.e., becoming famous and getting paid for it. You're crazy. It is by definition a whore. Okay, so you're paid to be in a sex scene in a movie. You're being paid. You're an actress. You're getting paid to be in a sex scene in a movie. You're a whore. Wow.
You might be. Some could make that argument. Some could make that. Wait, wait, wait. Not if you're having. Are you having intercourse? It looks like you are. I don't know. But you're not. No, you're not. Okay, so what if I'm not having intercourse, but I make a sex film? You're an actor. I mean, still. I mean, I'm still doing it for the exposure. Wait, wait, wait. Say again. So I'm with my current boyfriend. Yeah. You're with your current boyfriend. Current boyfriend. And I have a, and I make a sex, you know, sex. You're saying if I make a sex video. And then I let it leak. Yes. For the exposure. Because you want to become famous. Right. Then I'm a whore. You're a whore. Wow. No, I disagree. What do you think that the person is? I don't know. I don't see the difference between the two. Adventurous. Here's what else you might be. That may be true, too. You may be adventurous. You may be ballsy. Ballsy. You may be. Listen, all I'm saying is that there are many truths that come along with making a videotape with the purpose of becoming famous. If you make a videotape of you having intercourse and the purpose of making the tape is so you can leak it and become famous, you're a whore. It might also be true that in order for you to become famous, you probably have to be attractive. That's a truth. You probably have to be lucky. That's a truth. You probably have to be in the right place at the right time with the video. That's a truth. In the video, yeah. All kinds of things.
You're not getting famous, though, if you're, you know, Katie from Encinitas making a sex tape. You've got to be somebody. Maybe. No. Unless you're a pornographer. Unless you're a porno actress. Katie from Encinitas makes a sex tape with Joe from Escondido. How does that make her famous? If you're one of those folks. You know, no glasses, none of that stuff, man. It's been absolutely phenomenal. Give Clearview Eye and Laser Medical Center a call today. Don't put it off anymore. I put it off for years and years. Call them at 858-452-3937 or you can go to the World Wide Web. And check out www.clearvieweyes.com. They are going to take really good care of you in there. Dr. Sandy T. Feldman and her staff are incredible. And it's just been a really cool thing for me, man, to have 2015 vision in both eyes. And like I said, I've been getting a lot of emails from M1s that have gone in, got their consultation, and actually gone through their surgery and said, Woods, it was a snap, man. It was 15 minutes. I was in and out. I got perfect vision. So give them a call, 858-452-3937 or online at www.clearvieweyes.com.
This is the sound of Jennifer at work preparing to visit her bank. So you want to take a two-hour lunch break? Yeah, I need to visit my bank. It's all the way across town. This is Marissa preparing to visit her nearest Chase branch. Hey, just heading over to the bank. I'll be back in 10. Well, you know they just opened one in the lobby. Oh, be back in 5. Jennifer. You're aware this is going to come out of your vacation time. Oh. Marissa. Welcome to Chase. Wow, you guys are popping up all over the place. You can always rely on a Chase Bank to be close by your home or office. With new branches opening all the time and a suite of new technologies, Chase continues to make banking more convenient. There are over 5,300 locations nationwide, with more coming to San Diego soon. Visit chase.com slash mynewbranch for your nearest Chase location. More branches in more places. Take a step forward and chase what matters. I'm Morgan Chase Bank N.A., member FDIC. If you haven't tried Ovation Cell Therapy yet, what is your deal? The Ovation Nation is growing by thousands of new clients every week. Well, what impressed me were the results in such a short time frame. I was thinning on the top and now have noticeably thicker hair. I'm hooked. Thanks, Ovation. Ovation is the best product I've ever used.
I'll continue to encourage anyone with troubled hair to give Ovation a try. For a limited time, you can get the complete Ovation Cell Therapy System at the San Diego County Fair and receive a special Ovation Fair discount while you're there. Ovation can help stop dry, brittle, damaged hair and help your hair grow thicker, longer, stronger, and faster. Guaranteed. Look for the Ovation team of hair care consultants at the Ovation booth in the Bing Crosby Hall at the San Diego County Fair. And don't forget your special Ovation Fair discount. What are you waiting for? Join the Ovation Nation. Hundreds of thousands of Ovation users can't be wrong. Ovation really works. When a dog sticks his head out the car window, it's an expression of freedom and sheer joy. At Navy Federal, we want you to have that same exuberance when buying a car. So we created the Power Auto Loan to give our members amazingly low rates, affordable payments, and easy, fast approvals. Talk about man's best friend. Navy Federal. We serve where you serve.
Right now, Navy Federal is offering rates as low as 1.99% APR on new cars. To find out what you can save, visit NavyFederal.org or call 24-7. Rates based on credit worthiness, so your rate may differ. And now, Walmart's countdown to summer. Low-price tips to get you ready for outdoor fun. This week's project, The Perfect Pool. Walmart's got two words for you, pool party. But before you have folks over for a dip, make sure your pool is crystal clear. Walmart has low prices on all the HTH pool care products you need for balancing, chlorinating, shocking, and preventative. The San Diego County Fair opens Friday. Enjoy the fair with your friends with a discount coupon from your local Ford dealer. Get four weekday adult admissions for only $28. A savings of $24. Visit sdfair.com for details. at the San Diego County Fair. Presented by Albertson Savon. I'm the broken bottle that was thrown out a car window on the highway. I used to be full of delicious factory sweetened iced tea. Sort of like your tire. Used to be full of air. Hope you have Good Hands Roadside Assistance. Introducing Good Hands Roadside from Allstate. A different kind of roadside assistance. You'll never pay a dime unless you use it. And it's open to everyone, not just Allstate customers.
Go to allstate.com slash roadside to register and get important information. All three grades of Shell gasoline contain Shell's nitrogen-enriched cleaning system to protect critical engine parts against performance robbing guns. Grubby's is proud to be a sponsor for this year's Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. While you're at the concerts, make sure to stop by the Grubby's booth and experience the best burgers in North County. This report brought to you by Fantastic Sam's. What's in style? More importantly, what's right for you at Fantastic Sam's? Haircuts are between $15 and $20, and their color services start at $45. Coming today, your style awaits. Well, the freeway's a little busy right now on the 15 southbound. After the 76, we have a disabled truck that's stuck in the middle of the slow lane. Also in Chula Vista, the 5 southbound after Palomar Street, an accident over on the left shoulder. A couple cars involved there. And a backup here on the 5 southbound from Cannon Road to Lucadia. This report also brought to you by British Airways. They fly nonstop to London from San Diego. That means you're going to spend more time in London, less time waiting to get there. For schedules and fares, visit BA.com. I'm Stacey.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, back to the Mikey Show. Quiet, everybody. We're going on the air. With Mikey. Some guys do a bunch of stuff, but I'm not one of them. I'm going to be. Are you? Yep. Lauren. I think I need to be on Ritalin. Woods. You know what makes me happy? Copenhagen Long Cut, a fresh Dr. Pepper, and an eclair. Zienna. Just show me how to work the computer. And Jay. It's kind of my job on the show to try to destroy you. On FM 94.9. One Nation. M1 is a Mikey Show listener. When you call in, you turn your radio down, get to the point, don't cuss. Know the rules. Sienna, what's going on in news? Well, do you guys know what month your car registration needs to be renewed every year? Oh boy. Do you know what month? No. Like the little month you put on your license plate? I think it's March. I think it's March. For me. Mine is August, so this story affects me and a lot of people listening, I'm sure. Notices are not going out for people whose car registrations are due for renewal in July or August. If they try to pay, the state will turn them away.
Here's why. The Department of Motor Vehicles doesn't know how much to charge. The vehicle license fee is scheduled to be dropping to 0.65% from its current 1.15% on July 1st. Obviously, Governor Jerry Brown wants to keep the rate high because we need money right now. But this was a scheduled thing, and this is the difference. At 1.15%, a $20,000 car costs $230 to register. With this drop, it would cause... $130 to register. So state officials are saying they don't know what to do. Basically, the DMV alerted police and sheriff's department. You will not get ticketed. You shouldn't be if you don't have an up-to-date car registration if those are your months. Wow. But if no action is taken by July 1st, the lower rate is going to be taking place. How crazy is that? So if you have July or August on your car, you're pretty good to go. You're good to go. You're stoked. I have it too. And I'm like, so I guess I'm not paying my registration. I mean, I just saw this story. It was like right popped up on site on San Diego a little bit ago and I'm reading it. I'm like, what? Yeah.
But then people are worried that they're going to get ticketed because their registration is not going to be up to date. But apparently police officers have been informed to give those people a break. Pretty rad. We'll see what happens. As of July 1st, there should be, you know, a rule. Also, Jeff Bridges is going from the big screen to the recording studio. He has a debut album coming out. It's going to be out on August 16th. It's self-titled. And he said after Crazy Heart, he realized, you know, how much he loved. singing and doing that. And he obviously had talent doing it. And he said that there were a few songs that didn't make it into the movie. So those are going to be on the album with some other ones as well. Did you guys know that Woods and I are going to see him perform? Definitely. Definitely. Yes. Yes. In Arizona. My husband wants to go too. Just to tell you. Dude, please have him go. Hey. Anybody, if you guys want to come, I mean, you're all welcome. My brother, anybody here on the Mikey Show, he'd let you guys stay. I haven't asked him that. In fact, I'm offering it to you right now. But he would. No, and Steve. No, I know he would. I know that he would. Or the merrier. Yeah, absolutely. But if you guys want to go, it's, you know where else he's playing? He's playing at the same mountain winery that I...
peed on myself when I introduced Judy Collins on stage. The Saratoga Mountain Winery. Sweet kid. Kindred spirits. Yes. You can go to that because my dad would want to go. So many people would want to go see that. I almost feel like I need to give you permission to go right now and get them. Okay. Because I don't want them to sell out. Oh, okay. Now. I'll let you. If you want. If you want. Well, I want to. She got to run by her husband. You can't just buy it. They're only 35 bucks. He would be in on it, but you have to get like plane tickets or something like that. Yeah, you got to go to Phoenix. Yeah. Babysitters. We should have gotten a big bus. Let me tell you. On like a tour. We should have. They were selling for $100 front row seats. Damn it. And a chance to meet Jeff Bridges. Those aren't for sale anymore? No. Oh. You guys. I'll make sure we meet them. We bricked, man. We were like, oh, they'll be there. They'll be there. I thought. No problem. Nah, no big deal.
Yeah, gone. Picture of me, Mikey, and Bad Blake would have been pretty rad. We'll get him. I'll find his hotel. We'll get him. What's going on in sports? Well, it was a big day yesterday for Plaxico Burress. He was in jail for two years as an NFL wide receiver. And he shot himself in the leg and got hit with a gun charge and has been in jail for two years. He got out yesterday. This is him coming out of jail. Cut one. You know, it's a beautiful day. It's a beautiful day that I get to be reunited with my family and go home and spend some quality time with them. I like to thank everybody for their prayers and words of encouragement. Thank all my fans, you know, all around the world for the thousands of letters, for the unwavering support. And as far as football is concerned, if and when everything gets settled and when they get back on the field, I'll be ready. Yes, he will be on parole for two years. He's going to have to do substance abuse testing, curfew, all that stuff. He's got to abide by the rules. He's got to find a job and hold a job. So maybe that guy's going to have a bolt on his helmet. That's another rumor that I read, that he'd be a great fit here in San Diego. He would. I think he would be, as long as he can keep his stuff together. And then also the NFL is prepping. This is reported also that they are prepping for a possible eight-game season. Oh. They're putting.
What's the word I'm looking for? Preventative measures in place in case they can get a deal done. They need a certain amount of time before. They are planning on possibly an eight-game season just in case it happens. If the lockout extends. If the lockout extends, they go, okay, just for this season, we'll do eight games? Yeah. It's better than no games. Is it? Isn't it? Is it? Woods, they're not going to eight games forever. They're doing it. Dude, I know that. I don't want to see a half of a football season and then a Super Bowl after eight games. You wouldn't? No. What are you, five and three and you win the Super Bowl? Well, I mean, everybody's playing by the same rules. Dude, I know, but it sucks. Well, yeah, but Woods, the option is no football. I'd rather have no football than half a football. Absolutely. Yeah, I'd rather have no football. Me too. Jay, you don't count. You don't even like it. I swear, I would rather have none than half. Don't you have an insatiable appetite for football? Yeah, I want football like the next guy. Dude, if they said we're going to have a three-game season, that's better than a zero-game season. What if I came in and did two hours of the show and not four? It's better than none. Is it? Yeah. No. Don't do a half-assed job. Get the whole thing done. I'm hungry for football. You know, it's like going, hey, listen, I know that a dozen eggs is usually a dozen eggs.
I'm offering you one egg. I know you're starving. I don't want any eggs. No. Not unless I get the whole dozen. That's the truth. I don't want an eight-game season. I'm starving. Give me something. So what if the Chargers won the Super Bowl on an eight-game season? How would you feel? You'd feel like a douche. I'd feel a lot better than no Super Bowl. Yes. God, and not me. Oh, man. That maybe is a topic. Fire away. 5701949. It's terrible. Eight-game season. There's so few football games anyway. You know what I mean? It's not even less. It's not enough. There's 16 games, dude. I'm telling you, dude. Eight games to me and then you crown a champion is weak. W-E-A-K. Great. You know what you're about to have? You're about to have plenty of episodes of Barnaby Jones on Sundays instead of football. I got college football, man. That's all I need. The real...
Well, happy birthday. At heart. Happy birthday that you love college football. But for the rest of us that really want the NFL, I'll take two games if they'll give them. That's the problem, dude. That's the problem. What? attitudes like that. They know they have this badass product and who gets screwed in the end? The fan does. I agree. The fan with the insatiable appetite. It's like, throw whatever you want. Just give me something. Give me something. The fan doesn't have a say in this. This is all about rich guys and rich guys. But the fan has to say whether they buy season tickets, whether they truck their ass out to the games, whether they buy the merchandise. I mean, please. Now you're affecting my selfishness and nobody works that way. You're affecting, like, I'm not going to stop buying a jersey because I'm going to protest. So you basically, you won't? No, neither will you. Will you? No, no. If they don't have football this year, it's going to take a couple of years to get me back into the flow of the game, dude. Just like it did with baseball in 97. I understand that it did that with baseball. It took steroids to bring baseball back. I believe.
that football's a different animal. I do too, dude. And the players know it and the owners know it. We have such a craziness about football in this country. The players know it and the owners know it. And they don't give an S, dude. They don't care. They're going to hold out until they get their way. M1Chad agrees with you, Woodsy. M1Chad from Sarah Macy, you there? Yeah, I'm here. Go ahead. Hey, yeah, why have a Super Bowl when the game's only eight seasons? I mean, if the Chargers are going to win the Super Bowl, I mean... They're going to look like babies. Give them half a ring. If they can't win a normal Super Bowl, but they win an eight game. Now, I'm going to quiz you, Chad. All right. I'm going to quiz you because I just want to make sure we're on the same page here. All right. What's in question is an eight-game season. Okay? All right. And how long will that eight-game season go on? It better just go on for one season. Okay, because that's what we're talking about. Yeah. And the only reason we're talking about an eight-game season is because these two babies can't agree. By these two babies, I mean the owners and the players. They can't agree. And you're telling me that you'd rather have no football on Sunday than eight. Yep. I want to see the Chargers. Wouldn't you be just as proud if the Chargers won? I get it. I get it. It's eight games. No.
But they're still doing the exact same amount of work as every other team. It doesn't matter. See, and I wouldn't be as proud. Hell no. I just want to watch football. I kind of get that, but they're beating everyone else in the exact same amount of games that everyone else is playing. I mean, it's the best of the season. No, that's the rules for sure, but it ain't a Super Bowl. It's not a Super Bowl. It's on the lame season. Remember the lame season of 2011? But listen. Asterisk. Football's football. Give it to me. All I want is football. And that's the problem, dude. The owners know that. Nobody's listening to me saying that. Not you. The owners know that and the players know it. No, I mean, even if we all collectively as football fans said what I said, it isn't going to change. They know all they need to know already. Right. You know, us agreeing as fans to an eight-game season, even us going overboard and saying, you know, please, we all write a letter and say, yes, we'll take what you give us. Please, we beg you, just eight. We'll take two if you give it to us. No, that's not what I'm saying. No, but even if we did, I'm taking it a step further. Even if we did do that, they have all the information on how nuts we are. They know the appetite for football is insatiable. They know that they, that's why they started doing Thursday games, man. They would do it seven days a week if they could, believe me. And they probably will someday. Probably. They probably will. M1 Jason from San Diego.
Hey, how's it going? Good. I was just going to say that I agree with Woodsy that, you know, these guys play to win a Super Bowl. And if they're going to play to win a Super Bowl with an asterisk next to it, they're not going to play as hard. You say they're going to support them, they're going to be out there. They're going to be out there like they are for preseason games. It's not the same intensity. You're telling me that Phillip freaking Rivers is going to go out on a football field and half... Maybe not him, but some guys. Maybe not Rivers, but I guarantee a lot of other guys are going to do. Vincent Jackson, maybe. Don't they do that already with a 16-game season? Randy Moss was going to take plays off, and it didn't matter. The guy was a pro bowler. The guy could have a one-game season, he'd take plays off. Absolutely. You can't categorize it player by player. But, dude, like I said, if you don't give me the product that I'm accustomed to and want, I don't want half of that freaking product. I don't need it that bad. BS. BS. You and Chad and Jason would all watch an eight-game season. Oh, yeah. I would watch it, but I don't want it. You'd still watch it. I give you a decision. I give you a decision. You pick zero? Yeah. In that case. How about this, Woods? I got two pieces of paper here. One says, you know, television on it. The other says none. Me, Mikey, I say, give me the four-game package for free.
It's free because we get to watch it for free. Give me the four game. And they're like, Woods, you sure you don't want to take this? You get to watch four games. I'll go to Mike's house. No, no, no. Come on. You would really say no. I don't want it. No. And do you honestly think if there was an eight game season, I wouldn't watch? I would watch some of it, dude, but I wouldn't be as excited. And here would be me at the Super Bowl. Really? Is this the Super Bowl? That is true. Maybe just call it the per bowl because you can't call it the Super Bowl. The super. Yeah. Call it the Sue Bowl. Seriously, I would watch because I like football. I agree. But it's a weak-ass, it's a weak, weak, weak thing that they're doing. Wow. Man, I can't believe what we're getting here. M1 Zen from San Diego. I'm 100% with Woodsy's, and I would even go a step further. I probably wouldn't even watch the product for an A-game. Wow. Probably. That's strong. Probably. That's strong to quite strong. Probably. You absolutely would. That's strong to moderately strong. That's strong to quite strong. Just enjoy coaching my son in football. Yeah, watching college football, watching your favorite college team. Are they babies? Yeah, of course they're babies. Excuse, excuse. I will go to exactly what L.O.B. said to M1 Zen. I don't believe you either, Zen. You're just like Woods. I believe you, buddy. Talk big game, but when those games are on television, you're going to watch them. I'll be out. Yeah, I'll give you my remote on Sundays, pal.
My God. Kid plays ball on Sundays anyway. I don't need to worry about it. Does he? Yeah. You guys are being such babies. It's so weak of them to do this to us. It's so weak. It is so weak and no one, you know, obviously is thrilled with the owners or the players. Obviously, we want 16 games. But if they're going to give you a slice of cheesecake, Woods, you're damn straight. You're going to eat that. We're not talking about cheesecake. We're talking about football. Might as well be. It's the same thing. It's not the same thing. Something you love. I really think she has a point here. Let's say it's a, let's say you, your favorite place to get cheesecake is Cocos. Yeah. Which, by the way, it is. Coconut pie. Cheesecake. Coconut pie is my favorite there. And you go there. And one day you go in there and they say, listen, we've cut the usual piece. You're like, what is this? They put it in front of you. It's half of the. I don't want it. If they're going to give me the crust, I don't want it. I swear to God. It's not the crust. I swear to God. I swear to God. Your pants are on fire. No. Your pants are on fire. Your pants are on fire. Dude. Your pants are on fire. If they give me the crust, I'm going to be like, I don't want the crust. It is the crust. It is the crust. It's not the whole piece. It's free. It's the crust. It's free. It's the crust. They're giving me eight games. It's the crust. I want the filling. It's not the crust. They're giving me the crust. I don't want the crust. I don't want my pie. I'm Coco's manager. I'm like, hey.
Sorry, sir. Listen, bro, it's free. What if it's filling without crust? I'll eat the filling. U.S. O.B. Unbelievable. I'll eat the filling. I need spoonfuls of the filling. All of these people that are calling with this, you know, I mean, seriously. It sounds good, not true. I'm looking right now through binoculars to see the top of that horse. It's so high. Yes. I have to look through binoculars to see it because these high horse guys are like, I would not diminish my spot. I would rather see nothing. No! you would it's free we get to watch it for free i understand if we are paying to go to the games if i had season tickets and they said it was an eight game season i say give me half my money back for sure because i'm paying for a product but dude
I don't go to the games. I watch them on TV just like you would, just like most of us. Most of us watch them on TV. There's a very small percentage that actually go to. Yeah, when they're not blacked out, then we watch them for sure. Just another way to bend us over the table as football fans. I agree, but all I know is. Did you see three games last year? It was ridiculous. Take what they give me. At one's end is not going to be like, babe, you turned that TV off. Take it out of the house, babe. We don't watch that in this house. Remove that from this house. I shan't watch that product. Shall it be diminished in any way? If this product is going to be diminished in any way. I refuseth. Off with its head. Off with its head. I refuseth. I will make a statement. Be that team that wins that Super Bowl. And here's you getting the thing. Hey, where are you going? I'm going to Disneyland. I'm going to Hardee's. Yeah, I'm going to Carl's Jr. Because I couldn't go to Disneyland. I get it. I even agree. I'm going to SeaWorld. I'll have a week. It's a week. Super Bowl party. Yeah, yeah. Dumb. Half the people there. Half the food.
But all I know is, man, still be wings. All I know is, is that that stupid sport means a whole lot to me. You are right where they want you, pal. That's exactly where they want you. We have nothing to do with it. Yes, we do. Do not. They'll hold out forever and ever because they don't care about you. You, me, or you? I know that. I know it. At all. And I still need it like a junkie. There you go. Give it to me. Got you where they want you, dude. Got you where they want you. Derek Jeter doesn't care about you. Oh, no question. He doesn't care about you, Woodsy. I know that. I hate to break this to you. Derek Jeter. I know that. He don't care. You're not breaking anything. I know this. He know your friend. I think he is. All I know is I'm the un... Sunday, 5 o'clock. Yeah, this one's going to sound like this year. If you missed it, today, game number four. Halfway through the season. Here he goes. Back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back. Touchdown, San Diego Chargers. Give it to me. I'll take it. Yeah. I need it. For sure. A little macho. Sure. A little macho. 5-7-0.
194.9. M1 Adrian from San Diego is on the line. Yeah, hey, what's up, Mikey? What's going on? Hey, I was calling to say that I don't really see a problem with an eight-game season. For a season? For a season. Until they figure this out? What if they don't? Bro, they're probably not. They're either good or they're not. Well, in order to have the eight-game season, it has to be figured out by a certain time. So, yeah, it would be one year. It'd be a year. It'd be a year. But, I mean, so why do you not see a problem with it, though? I interrupted. I mean, there's teams, you know, that have won Super Bowls off 13-game seasons. There's teams that have won Super Bowls off strikes. You know, and no one takes anything away from them. What? That'd be like saying the undefeated Patriots are better than the undefeated Dolphins because they played more games. No, no. Anytime they had a strike, they didn't have a Super Bowl. Oh, I didn't know that.
I thought they had a fake Super Bowl. They had a strike. I thought they had a fake Super Bowl. No, there was replacement players, but they never had a Super Bowl with scabs in there. Oh, I thought they had a fake one. I don't remember. I'm sorry. You didn't hurt me, dude. Woods just stood up with a machete. That one Jose from Poway. What's going on? I'm 100% agreeing with Jay. Maybe you spend some time with your family? Yeah. Oh, boy. You don't count. You don't count. Hang up. You don't count. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but they don't care whether you're there or not. I don't care that they don't care. We know. We know they don't care. We want them in all their selfish glory and tight pants. What's it like over there in Perfect Val? L.O.B., if it was an all-white NFL, you would not watch, okay? Yes, she would. No, she wouldn't. Her boyfriend is white. She's shaking her head. She's shaking her head. She's like, no, I wouldn't watch. Listen, Jose, Mr. Perfect. No way. Yes, why don't you just spend more time?
With your family, this is not... Oh, what's wrong, Mike? Got to watch the Charger game today. Can't talk to little Jakey, eh? Not going to take that trip down to throw a line into the water, maybe catch a fish. Yes. Because it looks like Antonio Gates is going out for a pass. Who do you love more, Mike? Jake or Antonio Gates? Maybe do some push-ups. Oh, boy. You know the gym's open on Sunday too, man. Shut up! Maybe go for a walk. Maybe go for two. Go for four. Gonna do anything. Yeah, instead of four quarter pounders. Four quarters of football. You gotta have a quarter pounder for each quarter, don't you? Quarter pounder Sunday. Did you say Sunday? Yeah, you probably have one of them too. Parfait, whatever. Hot fudge, butterscotch. Lady Gaga has been banned from Lebanon. When we come back, we'll have a peace conference between Lady Gaga and Lebanon. Would you moderate? Okay. It's next. Be heard on The Mikey Show now. You've got to go. Call 570-1949. Here comes the best part. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. You guys care about the rules? More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes.
Celebrate. On FM 94.9. Yeah, you get U-verse TV for $29 a month. $29 a month. For six months, that's with the DVR included. Get an upgrade. You get your favorite sports in HD. Just like what we're talking about. Give it, give it, give it. That includes the MLB network. Woods just got excited. It's the greatest station ever. It is. AT&T U-verse. It's the perfect gift. For Father's Day. Think about that. Your husband, Sunday morning, wakes up on Father's Day and you come in and you present him with a printed out list of the channels that he's going to get with U-verse, including MLB. Here's how you do it. 877-ONLY-ATT. Call that number. Tell him, hey, I heard it on the Mikey Show. This is a great Father's Day.
It includes all these HD channels and MLB network. And it's only 29 a month for six months. How do I get in on this? 877-ONLY-ATT. Geographic and service restrictions apply. New customers only. Cash reward redemption required. Offer ends 3-19-11. For J.D. Power and Associates award information, visit jdpower.com. When you run a business, you're the boss. The big kahuna. The big cheese. Actually, you're the big a lot of things. It's your show. It's all about you. We're committed to your success and we provide financial resources to help you grow. In fact, Wells Fargo is America's number one small business lender and the largest SBA lender. You don't have to do it alone. Because at Wells Fargo, we're here for you and we mean business. To find out how we can help your business, contact a local banker, visit your Wells Fargo store, or call 1-800-35-WELLS. Wells Fargo. Together we'll go far. 2009 CRA data, 2010 SBA data in dollar volume. Wells Fargo Bank, N.A., member FDIC.
Chicken McNuggets foul. Whoa, whoa, whoa, what? Look, these aren't fries, Doug. These are McDonald's Chicken McNuggets. There are rules. You can't just grab them like that. Yeah, but you got 20 of them for $4.99. McNuggets rule number one. Always ask before taking one, even though, yes, the 20 piece is now just $4.99. All right, note. Taken. Two, never ever double dip. But what if I... Flip the McNugget on its other side? Yeah. Yeah, that's acceptable. Well, that's a relief. But no crossovers. Dipping into barbecue sauce after sweet and sour will result in a major penalty. So, choose your sauce wisely. The simple joy of golden, crispy deliciousness. The irresistibly tender and juicy McDonald's 20-piece chicken McNuggets are now just $4.99 every day. Most Important Rule. One McNugget at a time. What was that last one? Price and participation may vary. McDonald's and SeaWorld give you the summer's best discount. All ages save $20 on a single day admission. Visit McDonald's today to get your exclusive SeaWorld coupon. Now many locations are open 24 hours. Participation varies. Hey guys, this is LOB. Summer's almost here, which means that San Diego County Fair is almost in town. This year, the Ovation Cell Therapy team of hair care consultants will be at the fair with a huge booth in the Bing Crosby Hall.
They're going to have lots of Ovation hair care products, including the new Men's Max Pack, which is just in time for Father's Day. This is a great gift idea for the dads in your life. Ovation works on all hair types, helping to grow hair thicker, longer, stronger, and healthier, guaranteed. So go ahead and surprise your dad this Father's Day with a gift he's going to actually use. Give him this new Men's Max Pack from Ovation and receive a special Ovation Fair discount. And with this special Ovation Fair savings, why not give yourself the Ovation Cell Therapy System too? So get out to the San Diego County Fair this year. Look for the Ovation booth in the Bing Crosby Hall. Or log on to OvationHair.com and don't forget to put in FM949 at checkout. That's OvationHair.com and put in FM949 at checkout. You're headed for a divorce, but before you head to an attorney, think about calling a fairway mediation. First, it costs considerably less. Second, it works with both of you, not paid lawyers, to figure out what's best. Call 619-702-9174 or online at afairway.com.
This report, it's brought to you by British Airways. They now fly non-stop to London from San Diego. That means you're going to spend more time in London, less time waiting to get there. For schedules and fares, visit ba.com. Heading into Vista on the 78 eastbound Melrose Drive, there's a car stuck. That right lane's blocked. It's on the off-ramp. Also, the 5 southbound La Jolla Village Drive, an accident over on the right shoulder. And you've got some backup in Chula Vista on the 5 southbound right after Palomar Street due to a two-car crash. This report brought to you by CarMax. Selling your car is easy at CarMax. They'll give you a written offer, good for seven days, whether you buy a car from them or not. CarMax, the way car buying should be. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. scattered throughout the house. Sienna. La Jolla is my favorite bubble. I don't want to live anywhere else. And Jay. My kids' friends are always afraid of me. On FM 94.9. I was just handed a text that Jay printed out that says, Hey guys, when is the next Jay-only meet and greet? That's M1. Talk, Matt. It's text, Matt. I don't know what you want. It's text. You listen. I can't tip it.
I can't help it, and I'm loved. I'll give you the good ones. Mackie, I am beloved. Oh, my gosh. I'm beloved. Hey, people have spoken. There it is, Mack. It's right there in black and white. Jay's family members just making up M1 names. Tonight's 8 o'clock album, The Smithereens. Hear it. Green Thoughts. I like The Smithereens. I'm going to play Name That Tune in just a little bit. I was just asking Woods because he lived in Texas. The case of this 16-year-old girl, blonde, blue-eyed, beautiful girl. Pretty. Really pretty. Her name was Adrienne Jones. She went to high school in Texas in a community in Dallas. One day in Grand Prairie, they find her murdered, and she's in a field, and she's been shot.
And there was a blunt force trauma to the head. Now they're thinking, what kind of madman, serial killer, crazy person could be responsible for this? The Lexus 60 to 0 certified pre-owned sales event. Now through August 1st. You won't just get a great value, you'll get a great Lexus. See your Lexus dealer. Carlsbad, El Cajon, Escondido, or San Diego. 48 monthly payments of $21.65 per thousand financed. Call 1-800-USA-LEXUS for important APR program limitations and offer details. Only a limited number of customers will qualify. No down payment required if qualified. Warranty is three years from your day to purchase or 100,000 total vehicle miles. Sears certified pre-owned Lexus dealer for warranty details. Offer ends August 1st, 2011. Life's better with baseball! And the 2011 season rolls on with more than 145 live Padre games exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego. And then... Padres win! Join John Weisbarth, Jenny Kavnar, and me, Bob Scanlon, for the Sequoia Casino postgame show. And as always, be sure to like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter all season long. The Padres are live as they host the Rockies, 6.30 Tuesday. From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse, go behind the headlines and sports pages and get to know the real people who don the Padres' uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego.
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This report, it's brought to you by Brandman University, part of the Chapman University system, a non-profit school focused on working adults. Visit brandman.edu to learn more. Brandman University, do better. Well, it looks like the 125 northbound before the 94, we've got a traffic cone in the fast lane. Also, the 163 southbound University Avenue, there's a car stuck in the third lane from the left. And your drive on the 52 westbound right after Convoy Street and accident has that right lane blocked. This report brought to you by your San Diego. County Toyota dealers. San Diego Toyota dealerships have a $24.95 lube oil and filter replacement for United States Armed Forces members and vets, including your immediate family. See your dealer for details. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego, Lincoln Financial Radio Station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I like a skinny fry. I don't like... Thick. I don't like thick bags. Lauren. My handbag is made out of recycled kimonos, okay? Woods. I smoke a pack a day. You're going to live longer, pal. Sienna. Look how fair my skin is. I got freckles. Get out of here. And Jay. Yeah, back ribs are kind of a specialty of mine. On FM 94.9. Peace Summit between Lady Gaga and Lebanon is coming up next.
Sienna, what's going on in the news? Well, we know that getting too much sun is bad for anyone, but especially babies. They're actually saying that sun exposure in babies could mean cancer later. That's without sunscreen, though, right? Well, yeah, of course, put your baby in sunscreen, but just also limit the amount of time that they're in the sun. According to this article, they're saying young skin has lower levels of the skin-protecting pigment melanin. and a thinner outer layer, which allows UV rays to more easily reach the melanin-producing cells known as melanocytes in babies. But we're okay if we put SPF 50,000 on them, right? Just load them up. Yes, they're just very susceptible to sun. Okay. Also, in France, they've actually banned news anchors on TV and on the radio from using the word Facebook and Twitter. They said that they're upholding laws because basically they're giving Facebook, which is worth millions of dollars,
The upper hand when there are so many other social networks that are struggling for recognition. So why highlight these ones? The only time they're allowed to say it is if there's actually a news story involving Facebook or Twitter. Other countries ever just try to be on stuff. French ever just weird in general. Woods, what's going on in sports? The NBA finals kick off again tonight. Game four in Dallas. The Heat hold a 2-1 advantage. And I'll be looking forward to see how that series turns out. And then also the Padres had a draft yesterday. Major League Baseball draft, not as exciting or well-publicized as the NFL draft, but I was able to catch a little bit of it yesterday. Corey Spangenberg. Oh, we did get Corey Spangenberg. We got Corey Spangenberg, Mike. He's a second baseman. He's, they're saying, one of the best pure hitters in the draft. Also took a pitcher, Joe Ross, Michael Kelly, another pitcher, a catcher, Brett Austin, and a shortstop, Jace Peterson. They actually had five picks in the first 58. There you go. Beast. So, Sienna, why is Lebanon banning Lady Gaga? They're saying that it's due to moral grounds. So her CD, the most recent one, Born This Way, has been banned for sale in Lebanon. And they also took a bunch of shipments that were coming through. They impounded it. And it's because of the song she has on their Judas.
Oh, okay. So, Woods, you're going to broker this deal. Yeah, I'm going to do this thing. We've got on the line, we've got Lady Gaga on the line. Lady, are you there? Yes. Lebanon guy, are you there? Yes, I am here. Okay. I think it'd probably be best to start with you, Lebanon guy, and you just kind of fill us in on why the banning of Lady Gaga. Because she's freaking crazy. Well, I don't want you to get personal. Don't get personal. I'm telling you, man, she's weird. She got the cover of the album, right? Right. She have a picture of her, and she's screaming on a motorcycle, you know? Yeah. And then she wear meat hat, and then she wear, well, you know, let her speak for her. I know the bit. Lady Gaga, I'd like to give you the chance to speak. Well, easy over there, Lebanon guy. You need to settle down, okay? I'm running the show here. All right, Lebanon guy? All right. Lady Gaga, go ahead. So do you want me to wear, like, a goat? Yes, I do. I want to wear a freaking goat suit, okay? You're getting emotional. Lebanon guy, you're getting emotional. Lebanon guy, you're getting emotional. This is a mediation, okay? We're going to work it out. We're going to talk it out. Lebanon guy, let her talk. Lady Gaga, go ahead. I don't understand what his problem is. You're a freak? Lebanon guy. Oh, my God. Apollodid. Apollodid. Apollodid. Apollodid? Lady Gaga, go ahead.
Am I talking to the mediator or am I talking to a weird Lebanon guy? Now you're getting personal too, Lady Gaga. Talk to me. I'll relay to him. Okay. So what's the problem? I was just born this way. Oh, that's all. Lebanon guy. Will you let her talk? Don't you get it? Shut up, Lebanon baloney. Whatever, man. I don't even know what Lebanon baloney is. Why don't you wear a freaking burqa? If you're going to come here, have some respect. I wear a burqa. Really? Yeah, you also wear... Yeah, you also wear pajamas made out of a banana suit. Lebanon guy, this is getting out of hand. It's my job as the mediator. I'm going to hold my hand up until when I put my hand up, that means you can respond. I'm on the phone, you dumbhead. I can't see you. How do I know when you hold up hand? I'm on the phone. All right, I'm going to mute you. He has a point, mediator. Fair enough. Okay, what do you want? I want you to tell your side of the story. Like I said, I was born this way. All I'm trying to do is just express myself. No relation to the Madonna event. Express yourself. Of course. You would rip her off. Because you would never. The whole freaking song is a rip off of Express Yourself. You're a rip off. You're a rip off. Oh, really? Who am I ripping off? Hold on. I didn't just go through her catalog and go, oh, you express yourself. Oh, you're a virgin. Lebanon guy. Lebanon guy. Lady Gaga.
This is going to help. Are you ready? Listen. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You each need to say one nice thing about the other person. Lebanon guy, you go first. A nice thing. That's a nice thing. What do you want me to say, man? She's pretty. Okay, she's pretty. Oh, thank you. That's good. Now, Lady Gaga. Lady Gaga, you say something nice about Lebanon guy. He's unique. Really? That's all you have to say? You're unique. How dare you? Listen, sir, I do not... What? I have a vagina. Oh, I know, because you show it to the world. Yeah, I like it. You show it to the world. Show it to the world.
Lebanon guy. You're very excitable. Well, it's freedom of speech. The Lebanese people have spoken. They want Lady Gaga there. The Lebanese monsters want her there. There's not one Lebanese person that knows who she is, man. Oh, yeah. I got a call from Abdul. Really, you got a call from Abdul? Abdul Machado. Oh, okay. Abdul Machado, what is he, famous surfer? He's in Lebanon. He's a guy. Abdul Machado, like Rob Machado. They were just pink up names of famous surf people in the United States. Oh, what about, did you talk to... I'm going to go, man. This is stupid. Lebanon guy, you can't. Calm down. I'm going, man. You're not coming here. You're not coming here. Lady Gaga. Why do you have a t-shirt on that says, I love Gaga? It was a gift, okay, man? It was a free gift. I don't have to take this. Wow. Looks like they were not.
Wouldn't really let the mediator do his job, you know? They just scream at each other. Gosh. I guess there will never be peace between Lebanon and Lady Gaga. As much as we'd like to see it. Holding your hand up thing didn't work really well. No. Well, you can't see. It's the telephone. I forgot he was on the phone. New releases that are out today. It was like he was here. It was. In front of me. It was like that. But not like that. It was like it, but not. But not really. What do we got? City in Color has a new record out today, Little Hell. I like them. Well, him. Him. That's Dallas Green. Hail Sade. Yes. That voice is so beautiful. Yep. We're Gonna Lay, is that what it is? Live. Yeah, it's a good one. The Arctic Monkeys, Suck It and See. I just read it. I just read it. Stop throwing insults out of my... Words to live by. Just read it as it's printed. I'm sorry about you. Sounds pretty good. Duncan Sheik covers 80s. Oh, yes. Oh, wow. Love that song. Peter Murphy, 9th. That's how he sings. That's how he sings. Is he always? Yeah. He's been around for years. Singer of Bauhaus.
They come into America. Everywhere around the world. Hey, is that Peter Murphy over there? I trained Peter Murphy on this. I trained him. Clearly. Obviously. He said, I don't like your enunciation. I want you to go like this. Just practice. Go. We don't like to sing the way others do. We will sing this song for you. Go have sex with a cocktail waitress right after this. Absolutely. Out on DVD today is True Grit. True Grit.
Yeah, Woods called it true git. He didn't like it. You thought it was Shakespearean. I'm going to give it another shot because the version I had was pirated versions and you could barely see anything. I did catch a glimpse of the 14-year-old girl talking like Bill Shakespeare, though, so I was kind of out on that. You realize everyone says it was a fantastic film. I liked it. It really got me, that little girl. Really? Talking like, hello. Don't thou come to my town? I'm like, really with this bit? I thought they were hillbillies back in the 1800s. Just Go With It with Jen Aniston and Adam Sandler. That's the movie they were filming while we were out in Hawaii. Yep, which is out on DVD today. And The Company Men with Ben Affleck, Chris Cooper, Kevin Costner, and Tommy Lee Jones. I have no idea what this movie is, but with that cast, I got to see it. Yeah, and Sanctum is also out today. Oh, I watched part of that. You did? Yeah, I actually did. Was it any good? It wasn't. What's it about? About two hours. Gosh darn it. Why do you do that, Mike? It is based on a true story. There's some place in South America that's a cave. And that's what sort of made me, that's what made me excited about it. How did you see it?
I saw previews for it. Oh, previews, okay. Oh, and how did I actually watch it? Yeah. It was in Hawaii on the TV. Gotcha. On the rental. Gotcha. Because it's a little early. Yeah. It was the movies that's still on in the theaters. It's the best feature of a hotel room. Yeah. And it's this cave that's like a mile down. And people will jump, people will base jump with their parachutes into this cave. No, they won't. Will they? Yeah. That's petrifying. Yeah, it's giant. I mean, this thing is like, it looks like it's a quarter of a mile radius, you know, and they'll jump into it. And then what they do is when they get to the bottom, they realize there's water down there. And so what do they do? They get scuba gear and they start going underwater and this thing snakes down and down and down like miles into the earth. And then they'll have like pockets of air in separate compartments. What? And they've studied it for long enough that they want to see, well, where does it go? And they want to map it. Super duper fly hole. I wouldn't want to. But these people do. They want to. That is fascinating. It is. Fascinating. And it's scary because the movie, what it's about is they're down. Okay, so they go.
They base jump with the parachute down to the bottom of this mile cave. And then when they get down there, they get scuba gear and they swim down through these tunnels that are sometimes barely tight enough to get a body through. So how do they get the scuba gear? They take it with them when they jump? There's not like a stand down there with a guy like Fred? No, they jump with it and sometimes they'll lower stuff down by rope. But anyway, they get down to the water, right? And they'll find a hole and an opening and they'll go and they'll go and they'll go. And about a quarter of a mile, it opens up into this big, vast cave underground with a lot of air. And so they make a camp there and go further. And what this film is about is how there was this terrible storm that moved through and flooded it. And they had to try to get out. How creepy is that? I think LLB would enjoy that. Not the scuba diving part. I don't like things that go bump in the night. And it is bump in the night type stuff. Oh boy. Touche. Yeah, I guess the shoe fits. Let's see. So that's it for new releases. Carmageddon is something that they have coined.
for something that may be happening in Southern California that when Sienna told me about it, actually it gave me like a heart pain. I started to sweat immediately. Brace yourselves. If you're traveling and you have to go through the LA area on July 16th and 17th, you're going to have some problems because the 405 will be closed. A portion of it. A very large portion. Yeah, they're going to be doing road work in July, July 16th and 17th. And they've given this warning a full month ahead of time because it's going to be a nightmare. They're actually calling it Carmageddon. It's a 10-mile stretch of the freeway linking the San Fernando Valley and the west side. We'll be closed for 53 hours. Why? They could have a movie on this. They could. Well, when you think about it, LLB, they got to fix it. They got to fix every road. They got to repave. They got to do... You section it with cones the way that we deal with every morning. They're demolishing half of the Mulholland Bridge. Oh, boy. And it's a $1 billion project. My goodness. You know there's one guy that's like...
I'm going to brave it. I'm going to do it. And his buddies are like, dude, you can't. It's Carmageddon. You can't go. And he's like, well, if nobody else is going to be there, then it should be, you know, should be moving. I'm going to do it. You mean that there's going to be a guy that will try to drive through it? Yeah. Or like, you know, instead of doing the alternate route, like, hey, everybody's doing the alternate route. I'm going to go the freeway. The normal way. You're going to drive through the cones? No, no, no. That's not what I mean. Never mind. He's going to take the 101. He's going to look at it and be like, everybody else is going to be taking the alternate routes, the side streets and whatnot. He's like, I'm going to go my normal way for the most part. But what they don't understand is that sucker is going to be blocked off. It's going to cause traffic on both sides for... Miles and miles and miles and miles and miles. You know, the good thing is, is that the 405 is not busy. Never. You know there's going to be some jerks that get on their, like, bicycles just to piss people off so they're jumping. Let me tell you something. You can be on the 405 on Tuesday morning at 1 a.m. and it's crowded. Yeah. The 405.
That's a nightmare. July 16th and July 17th are the days. 405 is going to be closed for 10 miles. You'll be calling sick that day. San Fernando Valley and the West Side. Is it the weekend? Better the weekend. No, they're not. No commuting. But there's going to be someone down in Chula Vista who's like, hey, babe, let's go up to Santa Barbara for the weekend. And get there and be like, no. Woods, wouldn't you rather have it on the weekend than your work week? I don't know, man. Everybody's hustling and bustling, going to the beach. I've been in L.A. both times. I've been in L.A. Jay and I have been there a bunch recently. And it's been, we've had days where we've been like, hey, it was no problem. We made it in two hours one day. But then, you know, you'll hit it at 7 o'clock at night and it'll be bumper to bumper. Or you could be about 1130 and everybody's asleep in your car and you're, you know, just having to drive and man up and bring it all home. By yourself. Guy could be partially concussed in the backseat with a broken ankle. Have just gotten done vomiting. Six times. Six times. You know? Maybe a guy has compassion for that guy. Maybe not, though. Maybe a guy pulls up a skirt. Is this just hypothetical? This is all hypothetical. But maybe the guy literally has broken bones in his body. Literally has broken bones in his body. And nothing in his stomach because he vomited it all up. Yes. And maybe...
hyperventilated, and had to be dealt with by paramedics. Maybe that guy's friend is like, you know what? I'll give you half a break. Maybe that guy takes a donut out of his mouth. I don't think he had a donut in his mouth. But what if he didn't really have a donut in his mouth? In fact, what he had in his mouth was little oxygen. And remnants of vomit. From getting sick physically. From trying so hard. Maybe said friend is also in a boot right now for a broken ankle. He was trying to make his friend proud and happy. He did. Did he? No. You know, hypothetically. All hypothetical. All hypothetical. No mercy. Even though we've talked about it on the air, we cannot talk about it. Yet. Yet. Anthony Weiner. He said that. A room full of adults. If I said that in a room full of eighth graders. for sure you're going to get a couple of chuckles. I just said that room full of adults. Wiener time. That Anthony Wiener... Have you seen my wiener? ...had to hold a press conference yesterday to say this. Enormous, huge. At the outset, I'd like to make it clear that I have made terrible mistakes that have hurt the people I care about the most, and I'm deeply sorry. I have not been honest with myself, my family, my constituents, my friends...
and supporters and the media. Last Friday night, I tweeted a photograph of myself that I intended to send as a direct message as part of a joke to a woman in Seattle. Once I realized I had posted to Twitter, I panicked. I took it down and said that I had been hacked. I then continued with that story to stick to that story, which was a hugely regrettable mistake. This woman was unwittingly dragged into this and bears absolutely no responsibility. I am so sorry to have disrupted her life in this way. To be clear, the picture was of me, and I sent it. I'm deeply sorry for the pain this has caused by my wife, Huma, and our family, and my constituents, my friends, supporters, and staff. Oh, there's more. Much, much more. That wiener is smooth, pal. Smooth talker, is what I mean. In a pinch. His wife has giant teeth. What's happening? I don't know. Do you see the images ever? I'm just saying.
I'm just saying, you know, I don't feel she's been victimized enough. Screw loose to go in for that sort of thing. Call 570-49. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I got the world by the tail. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes. Yeah, boy. On FM 94.9. Cox High Speed Internet is way more than just an internet service. With downloads up to 66 times the speed of DSL, Cox High Speed Internet is an instant rock concert. It's an online gamer's winning strategy for saving the day faster. With Media Store and Share, Cox High Speed Internet is the vault that keeps your files safe. And with the free Cox Security Suite powered by McAfee, it's your personal security guard. Plus, when you add Cox Advanced TV with HBO Go, Epix, and Viewtopia Online, Cox High Speed Internet is your home theater on the go. It's all this and a lot more for a lot less.
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Okay, honey, I booked a great hotel on Expedia and we got a $50 prepaid MasterCard gas card. 50 bucks? See if the neighbors can beat that. Yeah, well, blow your lawn. You should, hon. Get a $50 prepaid MasterCard gas card when you book with your MasterCard during Expedia's My Summer is Better Than Your Summer Sale. Where you book matters. Expedia. Minimum stay required and subject to availability. Book by July 4th. Travel by August 31st. Terms and restrictions apply. See site for full details. And now Walmart's countdown to summer. Low price tips to get you ready for outdoor fun. This week's project, the perfect pool. Walmart's got two words for you, pool party. But before you have folks over for a dip, make sure your pool is crystal clear. Walmart has low prices on all the HTH pool care products you need for balancing, chlorinating, shocking, and preventing algae in your pool. HTH products are in outdoor living at Walmart. So they have one more word for you.
Thanks to Walmart's low prices every day on everything. Save money, live better. Walmart. Did you know that you can help protect your child from preventable illnesses such as the flu and whooping cough? Getting vaccinated protects them from these and other illnesses and helps stop the spread of illnesses in your community. It's now mandatory for all 7th through 12th graders to get vaccinated against whooping cough. Call your doctor to learn if your child's vaccines are up to date or visit www.vaccinatela.com. Stay healthy. Vaccinate. This message is brought to you by the L.A. County Department of Public Health. Cue a rooftop pool. Cue the cuties. Cue a DJ. Any DJ. But not a French house music DJ. Cue the unintentional double backflip belly flop. Cue the sympathetic eyes from the pool full of cuties. Cue the other guys lining up to do a double backflip belly flop. Cue the drink that brings it all together. Cue the Cuervo. Come celebrate 75 years of San Diego Padres baseball. Saturday, June 11th, your Padres will take on the Washington Nationals at 535. Both teams will wear their 1936 uniforms. The first 25,000 fans will take home their own vintage Padres cap presented by Cox Channel 4. The 1-2 pitch.
Strike three called, and the Padres win it. Get your tickets today and save $5 per ticket when you buy online at Padres.com. Mary Bergen's career spans both the land and the sea. For years, I was a marine biologist. Now, I'm a proud California avocado grower. Mary's deep love of nature keeps her connected to the trees and in tune with their needs. Like the ocean, the grove is its own little ecosystem. I work hard to keep it in balance. One bite of Mary's delicious California avocados will make you thankful she returned to solid ground. Insist on hand-grown California avocados. Available now at Vons. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I got a box of, you know, stuff in the mail because I like to shop on the Internet. Lauren. I know all the rules. I just break them. Woods. I don't like to work out with people. I don't like to play video games with people, and I don't like to work out with them. Sienna. I made reservations for us last night. And Jay. I'm wearing cargo shorts right now. On FM 94.9. Hey, Jay. Yes, sir? Are you eating a treat? No. You're not? I was. Why, did I leave a little chocolate circle or something in there? You left me a little bit. A little treat for you. A little treat. I figured you was hungry. I knew you'd like it.
Snap. Well, I was trying to get you to do a flip. Yeah. Left your little three musketeers on your butt. Oh, for goodness sake. So, Sienna, tell me about the guy that was instructed by God to swim to Liberty Island. Oh. This clown. Well, sorry I thought you were going to Penny Guy. Okay, United States Park and Police had to rescue this guy. He dove into frigid waters at New York Harbor because he claims it was a mission from God. This unidentified 29-year-old man, he stripped down to his little bathing suit, got in the water, and tried to go all the way to Liberty State Park. at 4 30 p.m and uh it was a three-quarter of a mile swim he got halfway out there and people were watching him like what is this guy doing what is this guy doing it's freezing and no one was helping him until they saw him farther out there like obviously having a hard time struggling and so they went out um rescuers and tried to help him and at first he was like no no leave me alone leave me here god told me to do this swim god told me to do the swim and finally they were able to convince him to get in the boat yeah
Sometimes it isn't God, it's the pizza you had last night. It's your favorite bit. A lot of people think that God told them to do something. God told me to take this job. Don't blame it on God. You're just dumb. How do you know the difference, though? Well, I'll tell you. That's a great question. Because I asked my pastor one time, I'm like, how do I know if it's God? I go, am I going to walk outside? It's going to be spelled out in mana in my front yard. Will there be signs? Will there be signs? Like, how do I know? If I turn the radio on and this song says the word love in it, then that means we're meant to be. It means we're meant to be. I said, how do you know? And he gave me the coolest answer ever. He says, listen, he says, you will hear a lot of answers to this. He said, one way that you know is if it's God is, is it backed up in the Bible? Is it backed up in scripture? If it's backed up, then you can go, okay. In other words, if you'll hear a lot of people go, I'm getting this divorce and God really put it on my heart. that this is the right thing to do. God showed me. And he just really gave me this peace about it. And I just really think, well, the way that you know that that wasn't God and it was a pizza you had last night is because he doesn't contradict himself. So he's not going to say one thing. God's not going to tell you to murder somebody because God says don't murder people. So that's one way you know. And then the other way you know is that if you constantly are living a life,
that is you know good righteous then you just use your brain and your wisdom that he's given you in combination and you go okay i'm gonna make choices i'll make decisions but i can tell you man i've been at places before where i that has not been the case and i'll make dumb choices if it's up to me you know i make the dumbest choices for myself and still do i mean still to this day we'll still make stupid choices Okay, the guy that was fined for paying a fee in pennies. In pennies. This guy is from Utah. His name is Jason West, and he was upset over... Jay West. Jay Isbell. He was really upset over a medical bill that he got for $25. So he went into this medical clinic and put up a little fight and said, look, I'm not paying this money. Bottom line, he had to pay the money. So what did he do? Dumped... 2,500 pennies on the counter. Boom. Oh, my gosh. And he demanded that they be counted and said, look, $25 is there. Count it. Count them all. My hero. It's cash. Wow. Yeah, my hero. You really won. He did. He did. Did he? And then they fined him for it. How can they fine you? How can they fine you? Yeah. I don't know. Fine him for that. He paid. Yeah. It's cash. Monsters. Wow. You really made a point. What?
Just pay your bill, dum-dum. He didn't think the bill was warranted, so he did pay you his bill. They fined him because they said that his protest that he did had no legitimate purpose. You know, he was fighting to fight, and it actually carries a fine of $140. What? Unbelievable. If you pay him pennies? No, basically he just caused a scene for no reason. They say, quote, no legitimate purpose. And that charge carries a fine that can go as high as $140. You know who doesn't get that fine? Who? The guy that he paid. He paid. Answer me this. The guy that doesn't make a fool of himself. Answer me this. You love the truth. Is a penny money? Yeah. Okay. Guy paid his fine. Yeah. Hey, listen. Him paying the fine, I said whatever. To that guy, I would say, really? I love it. Did you win? You're paying. Do you know how many times I've fantasized about doing the penny bit? I mean, in the hundreds of times, I've fantasized about walking in somewhere and being like, oh, you're 50 bucks? There you go, pal. Nickels. There you go. Feast. I don't know why. But this guy's like, count them. Count each one. He demanded and was little. Count them all.
I love it. Well, they had to be counted in front of him or else they could say they didn't receive all the money. So that's all he was trying to say. Count them up, kid. That guy's got issues. No. He's got mental problems. Count them. He doesn't. Somebody hit me. He doesn't have mental problems. Snapped in a good way, though. He snapped in a good way. He didn't feel that bill was warranted. Yeah. Then don't pay it. Then it goes against your credit. If I get a bill and I don't owe it, then I'm not going to pay it. Brother. But they can take it to... The credit unions. Then your credit screwed over a $25 bill, and then you know what? They have you. Don't pay a bill if you don't owe it. If you don't owe a bill, don't pay it. I'm sure he owed it. He probably just didn't agree with it. That's it. He probably didn't agree with it. I'm not paying $25 for a Band-Aid. And that happens. That happens a lot. It happens to all of us. Some of us are babies about it. I have some more stories with paying and change. A wise guy, they're calling him of course, in Maryland showed up at the county clerk's office last summer with bags of change to pay his tax bill, which was $966.86. Change. That is a lot of change. Also a New Jersey school district a few years ago punished 29 students who paid for their $2 school lunches in pennies. What?
They got detentions, those kids, for paying the $2 in pennies. Okay, maybe eliminate the penny from here on out. Just eliminate the penny. We almost did. We should. Listen, I won't say who this is, but there's a very, very famous rock star. And he cheated with his guitar tech's wife. And the guitar tech sued him. They got a divorce, the guitar tech and his wife. He sued this recording artist, big name recording artist. And the only reason I can't tell you who it is because the guy asked us not to tell. And there was a settlement, an out-of-court settlement. And this famous person requested that it be for $1 less. Because he didn't want to give the guy the satisfaction of winning. Even though he cheated with that guy's wife. Yeah, and fired that guy. And fired the guy. Did it work? And let's say the guy was like, yeah, sure.
My thing is, I want to say to that recording artist, like, so, is life better now? Like, do you feel good? Help some sleep at night. Does that, does it? I wonder if it does. My guess is, it doesn't help him sleep at night. Boy, it would make me feel better if I was given a $25 bill, didn't feel like I owed it and paid in pennies. I'd feel a lot better. Me too. I would feel so good. In your face. In your face. Here's your money. Here's your money. Mike! I think people are going to like this. The Mikey Show. It's a good time, you know what I mean? Call 570-1949 or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Hey, got to tell you about AT&T. You know, for a limited time, you can get U-verse TV for only $29 a month for six months with a DVR included. Now, here's the thing.
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going to drive me carry out or delivery only not available online limited delivery area tax and delivery charges may apply hey gang it's your old pal woodsy wanted to tell you about an awesome place called nutra shop went there about a month ago and they put me on what's called the contour elite stack along with a custom meal plan i needed to lose weight i needed to get back in the gym this is the stuff that has got me back in there and i'm losing weight Go check them out. They're in Mission Valley on Mission Center next to CVS or in Eastlake in the Eastlake Village Marketplace. Again, it's NutriShop. Go in there. Tell them that Woodsy from the Mikey Show sent you. It's NutriShop. It's time to race to the arena. Incredible dog challenge races over to the San Diego County Fair is Chevy Arena this weekend only. This is dog agility that will make you howl. While at the fair, come and see the new cars Chevy has to offer, including the all new Volt. Visit SDFair.com for details. Century 21 agents are high-tech gadget-packing problem solvers with an appetite for getting things done. Call one today. Century 21. Smarter, bolder, faster. Lincoln Financial.
Radio Station. Back to the Mikey Show. With Mikey. I'm not good at pretending to be. Lauren. My women's intuition has never steered me wrong. Oh, boy. Never. Woods. Well, welcome to the Terridor. I'm a cuddle bug. Zienna. I've never been on a school bus. Well, welcome to the Terridor. And Jay. Hey, I like to skateboard. On FM 94.9. Tonight's 8 o'clock album. The Smith of Rain. Spirit. Free Thoughts. But you always lose. Sometimes people discover things decades after they were popular. Sometimes I'll come in and I'll be like, you guys, this show Friends is great. Or I'll go, you guys, I just heard this song from Tupac. It's really good. California love. Do you know what a Snickers is? Oh, he knew about that one, Lauren. Trust me. Trust me. I feel like I want to tell everybody about Target. Really?
It's my new thing. Oh, boy. Welcome to the world. Like you needed a new thing as great as freaking Target is. I need to know what section particularly. All of it. The whole thing. Is that shirt from Target? Yeah. I like it. Yeah, it's nice. But not just that, not just the clothes, but, and I'm not doing a commercial for Target. I'm just saying, like, I don't, my wife does all that. But we, I went, she asked me if I would run to Target with her. And I went in there and I was like. Wow, this is a really great place. It is. Hey, Stacey. This is a really great store. You got to be careful, though. My friend said to have an intervention with me. It's a problem. I think it could become a problem. It became a problem for me. Because you could buy things and then buy things and then buy things. I got carried away in the toiletry section. Oh, you can go nuts over there. Can you imagine if somebody said to you, all right, five grand, five minutes. Target. Go.
Oh, it would be so fun. Throwing in flat screens, baby clothes. PlayStation 3 games. I got up early and I went there. Rebecca texted me. Said, where are you, babe? Oh, you have a problem. And I said, Target. You know, let me tell you what was really great about it. My wife doesn't like that I do. I can do 20 minutes in aisle eight at Albertsons. And the reason I can do that 20 minutes is I can pick up a jar and just, what is this? I'll just pick that jar up and I'll look at it and I'll read the ingredients and I'll check that thing out. Give me food. We know, Mike. I've seen it. I've been with you. See, and I didn't really just say that. You did? No, that was a clip of Jay saying I need food. I want tacos and burritos. Did you say that? You're in the wrong aisle. Yes, that's the next aisle over. Oh, okay.
That's the actual aisle in Vons called the ethnic food aisle, which has no business existing. The Latino aisle. Yes. They have more. But I was in Target and I went into the aisle that had school supplies, pens, highlighters, and nobody was going to bother me. Nobody was going to say, let's go, babe. No one's going to say, just get it and let's go. Daddy, daddy, daddy, daddy. No one's going to say, daddy, daddy, daddy. I'm not kidding you. The reason I used 20 earlier is because I spent 20 minutes in an aisle that's 10 feet long. 20 minutes. I picked up every highlighter and I was like, what are the attributes of this one? That's interesting. And then I turned it over and I was like, oh, I can make a thin line or a fat line. Now, if that's that one.
Let's see what this one does. I read that highlighter package. It's insane. How would you have explained yourself if a listener walked up and said, hey, man, are you Mikey? You're sitting there reading the back of a highlighter. I would not have been embarrassed. This is non-flammable, just in case you were worried about that. I wasn't going to get the pink. I was going to get the green. I was just reading the pink one. It was great. It was great. Did you feel the texture and the weight of the paper in the aisle? Yes. Just picking up protractors real good, looking at everything. True story. What's this for? Sharpness of the compass that was in there. I read what it does, why it's better. I realize that someone put thought into the product and that they had something they thought they could bring to the table with the product. And so I want to gain from that. I can get behind that. I want to know what they thought was cool, what they put into it. See, because to that guy, it ain't just highlighters. That's his life. It's his job. His life is the highlighters, man, and making them. So he's got to come up with some cool stuff for his boss. So his boss goes, freaking Johnson, we can't get rid of this guy. He's a genius. Hey, listen, I know the guy's a pain in the ass, but when it comes to highlighters, what about you guys? You guys come up with anything? Yeah, he's on point. Yeah. Johnson was the guy that came up with fat.
and slim tip. He did the retractable. He did retractable. What do you got, Fletcher? Fletcher, you came up with the erasable pen again? That thing was great. How about those mechanical pencils that the lead snaps every time you use it? Great work, Fletcher. They're like, since we're talking about Johnson, look at this fat Mexican in Target that we have on video looking at his product. 20 minutes. He looked at Johnson's product. You want to tell me Johnson ain't worth his weight in gold? Before you start popping off, Flanders, take a look at this fat Mexican for the next 20 minutes. It's worth his weight in ink. Worth his weight in ink, bro. The guy sold a lot of freaking highlighters. Talk to me then. I went to your paradise yesterday. My wife works for Staples Corporate. Walk in there. Does she get stuff cheaper? Yeah. What? When? How? How do I go? When? Where is that? I walked in. Where's it at? Tell me. Now. I went to take her to lunch. I walked in. She's like, this is our furniture division. All the office chairs, like badass office. I was like, oh, I got to have this. I am 100% serious. You could put me in Staples for an hour. It would take me an hour and a half to get bored. After an hour and a half, I'd finally go, eh. We got to go. Okay.
But I could easily for an hour and a half. Oh, I have to tell you this story real quick. So Rebecca and I, don't judge me. You're done. You've already done. Too late. Too late. So Rebecca and I, and this is a story I should save, but I'm going to tell you. Rebecca and I were discussing the kids' birthdays because the kids' birthdays come in August and September. Our twins will be two years old. Jake will be five. Five's a big birthday. Okay? For the twins, we're going to do this thing where we go to this little kid place. But Rebecca goes, so she goes, but Jake is five. And I think that he's at the age now where he should really be the one deciding what to do instead of us picking it for him. And I think to myself, yeah, I can get behind that. That sounds reasonable. She goes, and so she starts telling me, these are the things that we can do.
She's like, you know, we could do what we did last year, which is go to JW Tumbles, which is this little kid gymnasium. And I said, don't you think five is too old for JW Tumbles? And she goes, yeah, you know, yes. Yeah, I think five is too old for JW Tumbles. She goes, so that's an idea. She goes, or the other thing I was thinking was Disneyland, you know. And instantly in my head, I'm like, 15 hour day. Pictures of lines dancing in your head. And that, that is why Woods. Absolutely. Cause I'm like, okay. She goes, or, you know, and I go, what about like Chuck E. Cheese? She goes, Chuck E. Cheese. She goes, Chuck E. Cheese. That's definitely an idea. She goes, well, what about this? What if we present him with like those, you know, three options? And I go. I look behind me. I go, what do you take me for? She goes, what? I go, do I look like some kind of idiot to you? I go, that would be like saying to me, okay, honey, here's your options. We can either meet Steve Jobs at the Apple store where he will present you with the brand new, not yet released iMac for your birthday, or we could jog a mile. That's another idea. We could jog a mile.
Or we could go antiquing. Now you get to pick, though. You pick. It's your choice. It's your choice. You pick. I go, we're going to give him Chuck E. Cheese, which he's never been to and doesn't know what it is. J.W. Tumbles, which he's about to barf if he sees again. Been there, done that. He's been there a hundred times. Or Disney freaking Land. Oh, my gosh. Set up. It's a setup. You're going to Disneyland. Of course. And she goes, well, what's the deal? And I said, babe, I said, listen, can we do this if we do Disneyland? Because I know what Disneyland means. Disneyland means we leave at 3 a.m. We come back the next two nights later at 4 a.m. because you stay there for 47 hours one night. Okay, you go when it opens and you leave when it closes, which is my nightmare. It's every man's nightmare. No, Mike, that's not true. I'm a family man. Some fathers are good. Terrible fathers. They're good fathers, Mike. I call it a dream. It's a dream. It's a fantasy. Yeah, I call it a fantasy, Mike. My kids, me, at Disneyland, forget it. But, Mike, I forget. I'm a good father. So I said, can we do a thing where, like, because Jake likes to ride the Matterhorn 80 times. I said, can we do a thing where I, like,
Get to chill. I'll just chill on a bench. And you guys ride the Matterhorn 90 times? How'd that go over? Not good. And so she says, well, maybe we can get you one of those carts that my mom rides. We'll get you a rascal. She goes, maybe we can get you one of those carts that my mom rides if you don't want to. Touche. Nice work. You don't want to celebrate your son's fifth birthday. It only comes along once. Do you know what I said? I said, and I meant this with 100% sincerity. I said, I'm not there yet. I'm not there yet. I said, just like I'm not the dad yet that wears the jeans just below the boobs. I'm not that guy yet. But at one point, that guy was... a regular jean wearing guy. And then he said, you know what? I don't care. It's more comfortable to wear the jeans up to the middle of my chest. That's more comfortable. I like it. And I'll tuck a polo shirt into it. And I don't care. And I'll wear a woven brown belt. I don't care. So the day is coming. Hang on. So I said, I'm not at that jeans point yet. I'm not there. But one day I'll be at those jeans.
And one day, I just might say to you, let's get the card. It might get to a point where I don't care anymore. Shame on you. Oh. So who would Rebecca be married to at that point? Oh. So. So. Yeah, what were you going to say, Jay? I'm just, I can't believe you would be the guy on the rascal scooter. You're going to come rascaling in here one day. Not yet. Not yet. Not yet. But hey, listen. I don't wear the jeans up to the chest yet. Yet. Hey, don't we all? One follows the other, pal. All women. Okay. Many, many women. The hair gets shorter and shorter and shorter and shorter and shorter. And eventually, they have the same haircut as Dennis the Menace. Eventually. Eventually. Okay? Women have very long hair, but as life goes on. And they all say the same thing.
It's a very busy life. Do you understand? It's so easy. It is. It's very easy. And you don't have short hair yet, Hillary. You still have hair past the shoulders. Past the shoulders. I think it's also a different generation. Yes, for sure. It gets so... Things are changing. Listen, I'm a very busy woman. This is Barbara. I'm very busy. Four kids. Yes. Two of them are twins. Okay. They go to soccer practice and I've got to get them. The other one, for goodness sake, is on the trombone. Again, and I've got to get them all the way across. Of course, the only place they do it is Poway. Just bringing a picture of Brett Favre to the salon. Can I just tell you? Give me the Favre. This is the haircut that I'm looking for. This is Brett Favre. Wash and go, baby. Wash and go. This is Brett Favre, and I'd like to have this haircut. It is not easy being a mother, especially a working mother. Sienna, you know this. I have mornings where I... Don't even look in the mirror when I walk out of the house. I am so crushed for time. I do not even look in the mirror. It's gotten easier now that she's four and a half. It's hard to say, though. You said you agree, Sienna. Yeah. It's very easy coming from a couple of good-looking, still young, good-looking ladies.
When you're 55, 56, and the hair is Brett Favre, okay, it's feathered again. You don't even know why, but it's feathered again. It's short and feathery. Kurt Warner's wife has that hair. Yes. It's a marine cut. You're like, listen, this is a lot easier to take care of. Can you give me a flat top, please? It's just a lot easier to take care of. And I'm a busy woman. I'm a very, very busy woman. Give me the Larry Mullins. I'll take the representative wiener. Take the Anderson Cooper, please. What do you have coming up, Hill? I grabbed the new Sublime song with Rome, some Ben Folds 5, The Naked and Famous, The Joy Formidable, and I'm going to start with The Shins. Here it is. Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, the lovely and talented Hillary is up next. We'll come back tomorrow at 6 and do it all over again. Mikey shows up. Yep.