The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 06/07/10

0:00KBZT San Diego, the Lincoln Financial Media Station, the new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Today is Sienna's day to pick the music, and I will tell you that the very first song that we're going to be playing as her selection is the very first song that I ever played when I was a morning DJ. No. My very first morning DJ job ever. It was in San Luis Obispo, California. It was a big one, that song. Yeah, it was. It was a big song. And I couldn't have been more thrilled to be a morning show DJ for the first time. How was your first show? It actually wasn't so bad. Pretty good? Yeah, it was so strange. At the time, my inspiration was Howard Stern. But it was weird because I was working at a pop station. And so I was trying to incorporate that.

2:14mentality into like a pop show, which was strange, but it was also kind of funny. Yeah. It was oddly, you know, funny. But anyway, we'll play that song for you in just a second. In fact, I'll talk the record up. Please do. It's a pop song. It's been too long. I kind of have to. Yeah. You guys are going to die when you know what it is. It's been too long. LB, you got to help me. I don't know what to do here on this computer. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Welcome. Let me introduce everybody. I'm Mikey, and I'm the host of the show. And my promise to you today is we will give you the gold. I want to know where the gold is. I just said that we would do that. Give me the gold. I said I want the gold. I will give it to you. Goodness. How much can you tell somebody that you will do that? I want to know where the gold is. I want the gold. Really? Give me the gold. I will. I will. I thought I just saw Leprechaun in the other room. I did too. To me, it look like a leprechaun to me. I got to do a little bit of a treat. Who else in the leprechaun say yeah? Yeah! No, no. It's the best. I'm so easily amused. I'm seven years old. Me too. Same way. Welcome to the show. It was a beautiful weekend, wasn't it? It was lovely. It was nice out there. I learned a new phrase this weekend. What? From my wife. What?

3:41Marine layer. Yeah. Oh, you didn't know that? I didn't know. I'd never heard it. Being from Texas. We're driving in the car and she goes, literally, it's quite a marine layer. I looked at her and I was like, what? And she's like, yeah, I watch the news. I was like, that's freaking brilliant. Is that my wife over there or is that a meteorologist? Seriously. So I'm driving to my game yesterday and I go, I text her and I go, marine layer, real good. That's it. You must have been driving by La Jolla. La Jolla was nothing but a cloud. It was awful. Yeah. You say easy, Al Roker. Yeah, seriously. With the weather stuff. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. And I am 40 years of age. Wow. I know. Weird. Weird. Growns up. Yep. Somebody asked me, what's it like being 40? Same thing as being 39. Still me. Yep. Congratulations. Me. Woodsy is our sports guy. He's a guy sitting right across from me. And I've known Woodsy for a long time. And his good friend, Bark Malman, and a guy that I know, too, is coming in this week, later in the week. And not into the studio, but into town to visit. And he'll be visiting with Woodsy and I. Can I tell you that I talked to him last night? And I go, well, so Thursday, he gets in town. I said, maybe Friday after the show, all of us can go do lunch or something together. If you guys aren't busy, everybody's welcome. Right.

5:05He goes, dude, to be honest with you, I'd rather just meet at the restaurant. I don't want to come up to the station. I go, dude, you can wait in the parking lot, you sally. Are you kidding me? Yeah, because he works for the competition. But not even in this town. Not even in the market. Jabroni. He is such a clown. He's so paranoid. Whatever. He goes, dude, I really don't want to set foot in the building. Okay? And I go, okay, Sal. No problem. He's probably going to spontaneously combust. Seriously. We'll just meet you at Pizza Port then, pal. Clown. Yeah, I think I'm going to actually need to get an unmarked taxi to take me. Woods, do you have a mustache or some glasses with a big nose I can wear? Such a woman. Yeah, he's going to come in with those big, fake, bushy eyebrows, glasses, red nose. Groucho Marx. Groucho Marx. Groucho Marx. I'm like, this is someone, there's been a build-up to meet this guy. Oh, yeah. Hey, I'll tell you what, he doesn't disappoint. He's a fun dude. He seems like a fictional character. I know. So did Woods for so long, you know, because I used to do,

6:06Woods as a character back at the old station. I actually imitated Bauman. And Eddie imitated you. Because we've known you forever. And he was. He was for so long just this character that we did forever. Now people hear, wow, he really is similar to that character you did. Unfortunately. Let's see. Lauren is our assistant producer. She is 29. She's blonde. And she's very earthy. You know? Very earthy, very natural. All natural. Very green. Yeah. Is that a good way to describe it? I try. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Originally from Jersey. And let me tell you, if she wants to, she can drop that Jersey accent on you real good. Like no one's business. That's right. She's feasting on a kombucha as we speak. That's right. That's right. So good for you, right? Mm-hmm. Ay-yi-yi-yi. And I was just watching Sienna. Sienna's our news girl. She's 25. I was just watching her. try to organize her sweater in the front. Hold him in? Well, yeah. She's in her third trimester, but she's also, you know, they don't just run in the family. They gallop. They do. And so she was dealing with that. I saw her dealing with that. It's been a lot to deal with, let me tell you. A lot to handle. Every time I walk by my husband, he's like, they keep getting bigger. Yes. Jay is our producer.

7:33He is 46, and you all went to the media party, except me and Sienna couldn't go. You guys all went to the Del Mar Fair media party, so you got to eat some delicious fair food. And the reason that they want you to do it is because they want you to talk about how much fun you had and all that kind of business. Well, mission accomplished. It's fun, right? What was the most delicious thing you ate at the fair? Chicken kebabs. Let me tell you, Lauren. A fried Klondike. Yes. Was it good? My gosh. That's what I wanted to hear. I said to, listen, I said to Woodsy the next day, I go, what did Lauren eat? He did. First question. What did Lauren eat? Corn. I go, chicken kebab, maybe one fried onion ring. And she was like, ooh, my tummy doesn't feel good. So she ate it. It's so great. Then I had a piece of pizza. Yeah. Cafeteria pizza. Yeah, cafeteria pizza. And I had a fish taco, which was amazing. Those were. freaking good. The fish tacos, they will not disappoint. Really? I am not a fan. I am not a fish taco fan. I think it's a bit. It's like In-N-Out. It's a bit. No. It's an overrated bit. But those, I was like, mmm. Tasty. They were really good. Cinnamon roll? Oh, yeah. Had a cinnamon roll. Unbelievable. Yes, I know it. So great. I had plenty of beer at the microbrew. Did you? Yeah. Get kind of sloshy? No. You had a DD, though. Woodsy was your DD. Yeah. I was the DD. Designated driver.

9:00Hey, this is good news. Vandersloot, the little punk, is in custody, right, Sienna? Yes, Vandersloot, the same guy from five years ago with the Natalie Holloway situation. He is in trouble again. We talked about this last week. He attempted murder. Well, they think he's... He's got to be guilty. He's guilty. I mean, a 21-year-old woman from Peru, a Peruvian woman, was found with a broken neck on Wednesday in the Lima hotel room. It was his hotel room. Video has come out. I don't know if you guys have seen it. It's all over the internet right now of the hotel releasing video footage of Vandersloot and this young girl walking in together to the hotel room. A few hours later, he walks out without her in two bags in his hands. Yeah, a tennis racket was in the hotel room. They think that's what he used to kill her. Really? Yeah. Oh, what an animal. I know. An animal. He is. An animal. Oh, of course. When he was found, there was bloody clothes on him. He fled Peru, was found in Chile in a taxi cab. They had bloody clothes on him, so they're going to do a DNA test, try to match up the tennis racket to the clothes. Yep.

10:07He is pleading not guilty, but right now he's in jail in Peru. I mean, it's just, it's bad. I read some stuff about this this weekend. And, you know, the girl's father has come out and basically said, listen, my daughter scratched and clawed and fought for her life. And under her nails is going to be what puts this guy away. Oh, yeah. That's great. I am too. It would be so devastating for this girl's family and also Natalie Holloway's family to think this guy was in the grips. Yeah, of the Aruban Garubian? Aruban Garubian. They could have stopped this. They could have. Listen to what his former attorney had to say. This is an uncanny coincidence, to say the least. So, again, we need to wait and see. Really? Is it? It's an uncanny coincidence that he murdered someone? Peru, and it's just a coincidence that he was the lead suspect in killing another young woman? Just another thing that annoys me, just another little thing in this case was there was also surveillance video from the casino where they were seen playing cards and gambling, and the woman won 5,000 soles, which is like 1,750 bucks. That was gone, too.

11:20He took that also, her money. I mean, it's just like, you are the worst, dude. The monster, man. The worst. He has a special, there's a special hate that I have for that guy because I think of his kind of attitude of nothing can catch me, nothing can touch me. Entitlement. You know, his father passed away. I didn't know that. I didn't know his dad had passed away. So he's literally rudderless. Yeah, yeah. It's great. On the video too, another thing. I mean, there's just so many little details. More than three hours later after they walked in the room, like I said, he was seen leaving. And you can hear him instructing the hotel staff not to bother the woman in the room that he calls his girl. Yeah, don't bother her. I'll be back. Don't bother her. She's sleeping. Yeah. You can hear him say that. He's done. Oh, my. Oh, yeah. He is done. Well, he says that he didn't do it, of course, but he did say that he met her at a casino, you know. So they did hang out, obviously. You can't deny that. There's proof. Right. And what else they're going to be able to prove because they're so good. They can prove at what point somebody died. It's going to be very hard for the defense to say, somebody came in after our boy left. And also, can't they just watch the surveillance, see if anybody else went in there? True. Great point. Perfect. Great point. He's done. He's done. He's done. He doesn't have anything. There's nothing. They showed a picture of him being handcuffed. He still looked cocky and arrogant and smug walking in. He does.

12:42Oh, I wish I could curse. So bad. I wish I could curse. Let's see. 570-1949 is the number, and our text is 949mikey at gmail.com if you want to give us a call. Somebody is calling in to tell us about this girl's father. It's M1 Lopez. Let me see. Yeah, I think it's M1 Lopez. Let me go to this line. You can put her on hold, bro. M1 Lopez? Yeah. What were you calling to say about the father of this girl that was killed? This guy's father actually ran for president down in Peru. Really? Yeah, I don't know if you have picked that up on you guys' notes, but yeah, he actually ran for president. He's pretty heavy in the political government down in Peru. So he's basically, he hasn't really said it, but kind of sneaked it in that there's no way that this guy's going to actually come out alive or even.

13:42Free out of Peru. Excellent. I think one thing that I'll be interested in seeing is the difference in Peruvian law from, you know, American law in terms of... Yeah, that and the jails. I don't think he's going to have his three meals a day and his exercises when he's down there. Yeah. Well, hopefully they're a little bit tougher in Peru than they are in Aruba. Yeah. Where it's... Is that a British territory? I think so. Let's see. Oh. The MTV Movie Awards happened over the weekend. Oh, yeah. I missed it. I didn't even know. Probably the biggest moment that everyone's talking about. And I haven't seen these because it's past my bedtime. Yeah. But there was a girl on Girl Kiss. Did you guys hear about that? Really? There's a lot of that in the news because Miley Cyrus did that too. Did you guys know about that? We'll talk about that later. It was a fake kiss. Fake kiss. Yeah, she kind of defends it. Yeah, we'll definitely talk about that. Sandra Bullock and Scarlett Johansson shared a little on-set smooch. Told. What was the context? Do we know? I mean, yeah, but after they accepted the Generation Award or after Sandra Bullock did, the presenter was Scarlett Johansson. And I guess she just like kissed her. I mean, I don't know. It doesn't go into detail, but it says after the Generation Award. And then once the kiss was over, Sandra looked at the fans and said, now that we have that done, can we please go back to normal? No. The answer to that is no, by the way. Are there pictures? I'm sure.

15:08Oh, yeah, I'm sure. Maybe we make that right. Maybe somebody emails us, man. Yeah, maybe a bar fall over my microphone. Okay, so this is the MTV Movie Awards. Who do you think was the big winner? Really? Avatar? No. No. What? Think. Oh, Twilight. Of course. Twilight, right? Yes, they won Best Movie, Best Female Performance, Kristen Stewart, Best Male Performance, Robert Pattinson. Her performance was awful. Awful. It was an awful movie. Best Kiss, second year in a row, Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson. I don't know, guys. I thought she was rather good. Superstar, Robert Pattinson. She was such an over-actress. Isn't it? Isn't it? I haven't even seen it. It's so brutal. You just did. Yeah. I would have won an award. Yeah. L.O.B. You should have hooked that up. My favorite award, though, on this list is best WTF moment. Oh, my God. Why the face? OMG. WTF? Why the face? Why the face? What the? Yeah, why the face? Why the face? What the bleep? This is the best. What is it? This is like a coalition of one was Ken Jeong. I think that's how you pronounce his last name.

16:20From The Hangover. Oh, yeah. The little Asian guy. The little Asian guy jumps out of the trunk of the car butt naked. You're like, what is going on? Starts hitting people with a crowbar. That didn't win? No, it did. It did win. Oh, yeah. Of course it did. You guys know who Zach Galifianakis is. From The Hangover, yeah. He's from The Hangover, right? He won Best Comedic Performance. Super, super talented and hysterical comedian. Love him. He does this bit. My wolf bag. I know I'm going to butcher this. I know I'm going to say it wrong. Rap star. Tavon? Tavon? I don't know. T-A-A-Von. T-A-A-Von. I don't even know. T-A-A-Von. I would say like Tavon. Does he have apostrophes? There is none, but somebody will call us and tell us. He is Zach's swagger coach. Yeah. It's pretty good. Once I became a successful actor in Hollywood, I knew that I probably needed some help with my image. I didn't want to end up. Being a loser like Jason Timberlake or somebody, they hired Kayvon as a swagger coach. Kayvon. I've been working with Zach for about three weeks, and I make sure his swagger is at very high levels at all times. Like your voice? All right, Zach, let's layer you some clothes. Kayvon, what do you think about this green hoodie? No, no, no. Take that hoodle off your body. It looks terrible. I call hoodies hoodles. Try that one on. Yes.

17:50Yes. All right, now we've got to work on some dance moves, Zach. This one's called the I Don't Know dance. Now, you start with a lean on the what you're doing, and you give a little I don't know. Sing it. What you doing? I don't know. What you doing? I don't know. What you doing? I don't know. What you doing? I don't know. What you doing? I don't know. What are we doing? I always know what you're doing. Even when you're doing the what you're doing, I don't know dance. I'm going to ask you again. What you doing? I don't know. You're doing good. If you didn't need a swagger coach, I wouldn't be here, okay? Yes, Tavon is hard on me. I believe in him. When you have swag, you live by certain rules. You know, one rule I have is I only sit on things that are purple. I can only go to, like, two movie theaters. He's helped out a lot. I have a Dodge Viper station wagon.

18:55I have a chandelier in my broom closet for no reason. You could just be like this. Or you could just be like this. I'm reading a magazine. Am I going to do it like this? I love it. Isn't it crazy? I mean, he is so funny, Zach Galifianakis. And he didn't really get a big part until The Hangover. And it's like, dude, where has this guy been? Get rid of all the same guys that are in every movie and sprinkle some of these guys in. You haven't seen it. Miguel. You love it. There's a scene in it where they're driving in the car, and there's a condom in the backseat, and he pulls it up. He holds it, and he goes, what's this, a snake skin? When I see that, dude, I almost die every time I see that. You show me the between two ferns thing. Between two ferns? If you haven't seen that on YouTube, it's interviews that he does with celebrities will blow your mind. It's funny.

19:52Rock and Roll Marathon was this weekend, too. I didn't even know. I know, Mike. I can't believe you've been training so hard, too. Yeah, I know it. Let me guess. Did a Kenyan win? You know that. Weird. You know that. Runners from Kenya and Russia won the men's and women's division. Why don't they have a Kenyan rock and roll marathon and an American rock and roll marathon? And everybody else. Yeah. It's like five Kenyans racing against each other. And then two hours later, an American comes through. I know. It takes a while. Yeah. Richard Limo of Kenya won. He averaged under five minutes per mile. What? Do they get to wear roller skates? No. No. 26-mile race, 26.2-mile race. 30,000 runners participated. And each of the winners, the men and the women, won $25,000 prize. It started 6th Avenue and Palm Street right by Balboa Park. And Jerry Sanders fired the gun to get the race started. And it finished at SeaWorld. And there was a little party at SeaWorld. Big Bad Voodoo Daddies played. Nice. It was quite that performance.

20:55Finish line. Used to be at the Marine Corps Depot. Really? It's the first time they've done it there in 13 years. L.O.B., you are a runner. You like to run. Yep. Would you ever do a marathon or a half marathon? Yeah, I've done half. You have? How far is that? It's half the amount, so it's 13.1. I can't even imagine. My wife ran the Marine Marathon in Washington, D.C., and she said that .2 at the end. Pretty much like hell on earth. Yeah. It's like being in hell. That's what I've heard. She's like, it's the worst. You run 26 miles, you're like, 0.2 miles? Hey, man, that's why when we were watching the Olympics a couple years ago, the Summer Olympics, when they were coming into that stadium after running 27 miles, I'm just like, how does a human body do that? Sometimes it doesn't. It's not natural. Did it hurt like crazy when you were coming into the final leg, L.O.B.? Well, like I said, I only did the half, but I did the America's Finest City, and I thought... When I came around the bend, I was like, home stretch. Yeah. So I started like taking off, like picking off people. And then I came around the bend and it was like a little sign that said like 0.6 miles. And I was like, what? No. And I was like already spent. So, yeah. So then I had to keep up the gusto. You know, people tell me all the time, if you run.

22:14You'll get this natural high. You'll want to do it all the time. It'll be great. Blah, blah, blah. I'm like, really? Hey, it's Michael Shannon giving a little Ace of Base. This is a really big hit right now. It's called The Sign. Lots of requests for this one, so we want to get it out to you. Slide 86 FM, by the way, going to be out tonight. If you want to come and join us for Margaritas, we'll be downtown San Luis Obispo. Come and check us out. It's Michael Shannon with Ace of Base. You got to do it. You got to do it on the beat. Ace of Base. Wow. I love it. I love that stuff so much. You turned it off. I know. I'm going to say it again. It's worthy of it. You know what I mean? I love the on the beat is the best part. On the beat stuff. Okay. LeBron James, by the way. Don't know if you know this. He did his Larry King thing. James. Larry. If anyone doesn't know, Woods drank a five-hour energy drink. He did right before we went on the air. He looks like he was on an elliptical just now with his hands going back and forth like the skis. I know.

23:19Are you sure he drank it? He didn't snort it? He's got a Red Bull in the queue, too. I miss Kathy. Hey, Woodsy and I were playing around with a soundboard, too, so we'll do that. Coming up, don't go anywhere. 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. How did you morons even get in here? More coming up on FM 94.9. The hottest new bar in the Gaslamp? No doubt about it. The Tipsy Crow at 5th and F. The Tipsy Crow. Great name, great bar. Every Monday at the Tipsy Crow, it's game night with trivia, shuffleboard, board games, even Wii. Every Friday and Saturday night, three levels of entertainment with something for everybody. From a full dance floor to Jumbo Connect 4. Classic, crazy, cool. The Tipsy Crow with the Gaslamp's best craft beer collection. Check out the daily specials at thetipsycrow.com. The Tipsy Crow, corner of 5th and F in the Gaslamp. Great name.

24:25Great Bar. September 23rd, wedding anniversary. Next Tuesday, karate tournament. Saturday, 7.15 a.m., pancakes with dad. Sundown, June 5th, local wildlife sanctuary celebrates owl night. Our schedules are very much our own. And with so much going on, shouldn't there be more flexibility on when you make your monthly mortgage payment? At Wells Fargo, when you want a mortgage with a payment plan that runs on your schedule that also has low interest rates, we're with you. That's why we've created automatic mortgage payment choices through the Wells Fargo Preferred Payment Plan, a free service available with any of our mortgages. Our automatic mortgage payment choices allow you to divide your mortgage payments to better match your pay cycle. Schedule free and automatic withdrawals weekly, biweekly, semi-monthly, or monthly. Plus, there are options that allow you to pay down your mortgage and reduce the total interest over the life of your mortgage. Call, click, or stop by Wells Fargo today. Just make sure it won't conflict with Owl Night. Wells Fargo. Together, we'll go far. Wells Fargo Home Mortgage, a division of Wells Fargo Bank N.A., is an equal housing lender. Suffering from high interest rates on your credit cards? Barely able to make the minimum payments on your debts? Our team of lawyers here at the Bankruptcy Law Center can help. Call 1-800-718-9688 or go to our website at GetOutOfDebtSanDiego.com. You can file for bankruptcy and still keep your home and your cars. A bankruptcy can wipe out your second mortgage and bring you current if you're behind on your house payments. Most people think bankruptcy destroys your credit, but many individuals actually have better.

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26:45Here's something else to consider. I saved $1,600 a year by switching over to AIS. Now, I've got my parents doing it. I have members of my family doing it. I wouldn't do that unless I actually really felt strongly about this company, and I do. I've been in business with AIS for many years, and the reason is because of people just like you that have called them, and they've actually experienced the savings. You can do that. 1-800-777-4AIS. That number again, 1-800-777-4247. Give AIS a call and tell them that Mikey sent you. Make sure your low fares stay low to St. Louis with no bag fees from Southwest Airlines. Grab your bag. It's on nonstop from San Diego to St. Louis. Book your nonstop flights to St. Louis now at southwest.com. Weight and size limits apply. This report, it's brought to you by Allstate. Want to save money without cutting insurance coverage? Get Allstate today, dollar for dollar. Nobody protects you like Allstate. On the 805 southbound between Claremont Mesa Boulevard, El Cajon, we've got a little congestion. Speeds about 45 miles an hour. Pretty much the same story here in San Marcos on the 78 eastbound San Marcos Boulevard. A little bit of slowing to the 78. This report, it is also brought to you by CarMax. CarMax will buy your car today even if you don't buy one from them. That's why this March.

28:07choice is always CarMax the way car buying should be. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. My name is Mikey and I did not graduate from high school. Thank you. Lauren. Do you have coconut water? Woods. Don't go to the doctor. It's in my family. We don't go to the doctor. Sienna. I have the fastest wiener dog on the planet. And Jay. I know I didn't cry. I'm a man. On FM 94.9. Tokens. Client sleeps tonight. Still working at Old East Station where I played that. Loved his song. I know. It's a good one. It's like my favorite song when I was little. It's good, right? Hey, somebody just wrote us and said that they were checking out the Mikey Show website, MikeyShow.com. They sell the Mikey Show comic strips, which we have up there. One of our M1s is a brilliant artist and is doing comic strips for us. Hysterical. Great stuff. Got to check it out, man. It's really good.

29:18So anyway, it's MikeyShow.com. It's really good. Got to talk about LeBron James and what's going on with LeBron James. He was on the Larry King show, if you missed it. So we'll talk about that in just a second. But first, Woodsy coming strong with the Woods on Sports. Yeah. Woods, Woods, Woods. Yeah. Woods on Sports. Hey, everybody. Padres were able to salvage a win in Philly. Philly! By playing their worst game of the year. They did not have a good, strong, solid game, but it's the mark of a good team, man. You still find a way to win. They snuck one in. They snuck one in there. They did lose. They lost to Roy Halladay, so I'm going to have to pay off a bet to Mikey. And then they lost the next day to Jamie Moyer, who's 47 years old. Tell everybody what the bet was. I said if the Padres beat Halladay, who was fresh off a perfect game, then Mikey and I...

30:23I was going to drag Mikey to a Padres game with me. Yeah, and he says drag because it's tough for me to stay up that late. I'm a bit of an early bird. And you won, Mike? I won. Yeah, he won. So now I have to go watch some Spanish documentary at his house. He was trying to explain it to me yesterday. Oh, you already have it picked out? It has subtitles. I thought he was being suspicious. He was explaining it to me in the car when I was driving, and here was me. Huh? Huh? What? Sounds great. It's a good one. It's one of my top three movies ever. Perfect. What's it called? Amores Barros. What? There's a dog fighting scene in there too, so that's going to be great for me. It's a really good film. I think you'll enjoy it. You just called it a film, so I know I won't. It's film noir. Kill me.

31:08Padres starter Kevin Correa only lasted one and two-thirds innings, but the bullpen came in. They threw eight and a third scoreless, which is money from a bullpen. They can earn a split tonight in the series if they can beat Cole Hamels. And there's still a half game up in the West, so just playing really well. Sweet. Also, the Major League Baseball draft is tonight. Never gets as much love as the NFL draft or the NBA draft, for that matter. Probably because you can't trade picks, which is rough. And they're talking about maybe... getting something like that done in the next few years, which I think would be phenomenal. But the Padres will be picking ninth. Did you know that Jason McLeod is their assistant GM? And what he did, he's the guy responsible for drafting Dustin Pedroia for the Red Sox. Really? His draft in 2005 was the number one draft. And we got him. And we got him. So big eyes are on him and Jed Moyer. Let's see what happens. I'm kind of excited about it myself. Also, the Celtics have evened the series with the Lakers. They stole one at home from the Lakers last night. With a lot of help from the refs in Los Angeles. Here's the Zen master, Phil Jackson, on the loss. Cut one. In a sequence like this, there's no doubt it's a blow. Is he plugging his nose? I'm just asking. That's all it was. It was just a question. In a sequence like this, there's no doubt it's a blow to us to lose a home court. We anticipated this might happen, and we just have to go pick it up. You got it.

32:28That was brutal. Did you see the game? Yeah, it was pretty ugly. I saw the last part because I got home at freaking 7.30 for my baseball game. But Ray Allen was pretty solid. He hit 32 points. He hit eight three-pointers, which is a finals record. Game three tomorrow night in Boston, where the next three games will be. All right. Also, sad note, the Wizard of Westwood, John Wooden, has passed on at the age of 99. Probably the greatest coach in any sport ever. Very inspirational. Absolutely. He won 10 national championships, including seven in a row. That's just dominance. He coached hundreds of great players. Bill Walton, Kareem. Here's Kareem talking about Wooden. Cut, too. It's very difficult for me to put into words the greatness of John Wooden. He was so much more than a basketball coach. How do you put that in words? I don't feel that it's necessary to try. I only want to say that to have him in my life was a true blessing. I will always be thankful that I was able to be one of his students and benefit from the bright light that he shone on all that he meant. Yeah. I got chills. I know. He's sad. He lived a great life. He did. Touched a lot of people. Absolutely. Literally. Finally, the Blackhawks put it on the Flyers yesterday, winning 7-4. They took a 3-2 series lead in the Stanley Cup Finals. Highlight of the game for me.

33:51Vince Vaughn on the glass watching his hometown Hawks. Nice. That's it. That's Woods on Sports, pal. LLB, I'm pulling for your Flyers. Yeah, me too. I don't know why. I mean, I don't follow hockey, but, you know, you're a Philly fan, so I'll cheer on your Flyers. There's no Chicago fans in here, so we might as well, right? Right? Kid's a Chicago fan. Lived in Chicago five years. Yeah, well, you selectively. Whatever you feel like being a fan of. How about LeBron James going on Larry King and talking about a possible new movie that he may be doing? You're doing a movie? Yep. What is it? I'm doing a movie called Ballers. Weird. Balls? Balls. Larry doesn't hear. Isolate that clip. He doesn't hear that good. He's 106. Yeah, so he doesn't know what ballers means. Isolate that. Yeah. Balls? He didn't know. That's all I'm saying. Balls? Balls. Balls. Basketballers. But it's about, it's a comedy, but it's me having, that's what I think. Yeah, basketballs, I get it. Nuts. Yeah, what are you talking about? Balls. Balls. I knew I was going to hit gold here. You're into pornography. Is that the deal? Incredible. Unbelievable. One more time. Here we go. One more time. Here we go.

35:14You're doing a movie? Yep. What is it? I'm doing a movie called Ballers. Balls? Balls? No, Larry. What's a baller? Balls? In my day, that's how you hollowed out a melon. Balls. Balls. Oh, Larry. Amazing. You older fella. Maybe retire, pal. Yeah. Maybe call it a day. Maybe get Carson Daly on there or something. I don't know. Carson Daly Live. So, Woodsy and I like to get together and play with soundboards and interview. Soundboards. This time we got together and we thought, well, why not do Pee Wee Herman? My guest today is a world famous comedian. However, today this is not any joking around matter. We are talking to Pee Wee Herman. Pee Wee, thank you for joining me. Hi, Mario. My name is Mikey and that mistake has been made before because my name begins with an M. Let me get right down to questions with you. First of all, why do you not go by Pee Wee Herman anymore?

36:28save your questions until i'm through save my questions until you're what please save your questions until i'm through i believe you said please save my questions until you're through doesn't make much sense my question to you is peewee herman what's next where will you go from where you are now how can you go from where you are now Are you trying to drive me crazy? Trying to ask you questions. Don't avoid them. Answer me now, Pee Wee Herman. What are you going to do with the rest of your life? Did you steal Mr. Steve's apples? No, I did not. Answer my question. I said, I said, don't talk when I'm talking. I said, what are you going to do with the rest of your life? Bring a present for somebody else, okay? What do you mean you're going to bring a present for somebody else? Why don't you sit down and talk to me like a grown adult? Guess what? What? I'm having a party and you are invited. Don't try to change the subject or butter me up. What's so funny? How could I refuse that you asked so nicely? That's what I said. What is so funny? Why don't you take a picture in a lifelike? I'm not even taking pictures or looking at you weird. Answer me. Don't be free. Are you uptight or what? My what?

37:54Are you uptight or what? I'm not uptight. I'm trying to ask you questions. Answer me. Pee Wee Herman, thank you for joining me. Are you a vegetarian? No, I eat meat. Thank you for joining me. Great. Really one of my more in-depth interviews. Enjoy that. You did a good job. All right. Tell me where you are on this. Mikey Show. My wife's a stay-at-home mom. I work to support us and our three kids. We have a shared bank account. And aside from our bills, We both get a certain allotted amount of money each month for spending. My wife inevitably goes a little over every month, and I try not to say anything because she does so much for our family. However, my 40th birthday was in May, so my wife dipped into our savings and bought us a trip to Greece. Whoa. Immediately when she gave me the gift, I thought, wow, there's money we don't have.

38:57She was really excited to give me the gift because I am of Greek heritage and have been saying for years that I would like to get out there someday. So on one hand, I really appreciate the gift and the thoughts she put into it. But I also know that someday is not today. I've been trying to live by a budget and I just can't justify spending five grand on a trip to Greece right now. How can I tell her I don't think we should go on the trip? Without breaking your heart, M1, big fat Greek predicament. Well, if the bottom line is you can't afford it, you can't afford it. That's the bottom line no matter how you look at it. It's the bottom line. If they have, I mean, this is just the way I see it. If they each have, you know, money that they put aside for the bills and then they each have spending money, is $5,000 really that much more? Well. It just depends. That's a cheap trip to Greece. Well, it sounds like they hit their savings up. Yeah. They hit their savings. And the way I look at it is this, man. You don't live forever and you can't take it with you when you go. I mean, hey, we've all done frivolous things and we probably didn't have the money. This sounds pretty amazing to me. I think, hey, suck it up, pal. It's a trip to Greece, not to, you know.

40:18She's not making you do something awesome. But from his point of view, I mean, I would never do that and just be like, oh, by the way, Todd, I guess we were going on your birthday. That's kind of something you should talk about if you're married. It's a shared bank account. Yeah. Oh, for sure. Hey, it's tough, but it's better than a sharp stick in the eye. Yeah. 570-1949. What do you think, M1s? 949mikey at gmail.com. Yeah, it's hard to say whether the... this is like a drop in the bucket for them or whether this is a huge hit to their savings because I kind of, on one hand, I agree with Woods because it's like you're saving for a rainy day and then, you know, you got nothing but sunshine. Hey, I'll say what people I know are thinking. Sounds like maybe somebody wanted their own little trip to Greece and they were like, no, no, no. He's Greek. It sounds like it was his idea. If you're going to Vegas, you don't want to go with your wife, probably. I got a question. I got us a Greek villa. I've got a question. I mean you. I mean you. I mean you. I got you a Greek villa. No, for $5,000, they get a steal. Yeah, for sure. I got a question. What? So when you get married, what's yours is hers, right? Sure. There you go.

41:38So you're saying... No, it's theirs. It's theirs. Well, yeah, but he said that she gets a certain amount of money per month, and so does he. So I'm sure she dipped into his, too. Well, she dipped into their savings. I think it's hard for him to see, as he's putting checks in the account and checks in the savings, to see that... Well, she's kind of got a taste of this, too, even though I'm out. It doesn't seem like his problem is that she's spending his money. It seems like she's spending their money that they have aside for something else. There's no way that anybody should come into your bank account, even if it's your wife, and just spend the money without a conversation. You're a team. Isn't it theirs, though? It is theirs. With it being theirs, they share the decisions that are made with that money. But it was a surprise. It's not a surprise when you're taking me somewhere for $5,000. There's no way. If you don't have the money, you shouldn't spend the money. They have the money because it's in the savings. Well, if she had maybe saved up each month and didn't spend her part of the money and that was like, look, babe, I didn't spend any of mine. Like, this is my gift to you. He'd be like, you are awesome. I don't think she did that. She's been going over, he said. Yeah. $5,000 is a lot of money. M1 Joanna from Escondido. Hi. I was just commenting and saying that.

42:58she should have saved up her spending money throughout the year. Yeah. And that way that, you know, it would have actually been a true gift because it really, like I was hearing what you were saying earlier, that they really were spending, it was a gift, but he kind of spent for his own gift. Yeah. Look what you got yourself on your birthday. Look what you paid for your scholarship. Right. Exactly. I don't know. I mean, I hate to be the downer thing with that, but I'm like, really? It's not. A little bit of like, just got us a nice vacation to Greece. What do you mean by that? See, I have a hard time believing that it's just all about him and I got you a $5,000. She could have picked any place, but she picked the place that he's been saying he wants to go. True. Yeah, but who doesn't want to go to Greece? Who doesn't? You probably don't want to go, Mike. No way. That would be like torture for Mike. But that would be the deal. If I didn't and I got that gift, that's truly something, you know? If this woman was like, I can't stand places that are out of the United States. I'd be like, wow, that's pretty. But it's like, I got us a $5,000 trip to Greece. Probably pretty nice. A little villa. Nice Mediterranean breeze. Probably not that much. I mean, the airfare alone is probably a lot right now. It's true. I'd say maybe this clown quits crying about a trip to Greece. So the M1 Michael from La Jolla is saying too, right, Michael? Yeah, good morning. Morning.

44:28Here's what this guy needs to do. He needs to, like, get his tail to work, make that money for himself, and pretend like she's really creating it all, but say, baby, I think it's an awesome idea. Let's go. A lot of money. Five grand. Michael, would you be mad if your wife dipped into 5K? No, just because it's like a partnership. She's excited about it. She wants to go, even though she's, like, masking it in that it's all for me. Heck, let's just go do it. Well, you probably can afford it. From this guy who wrote this, I'm sure he thinks that they can't. I mean, I'd like to know how much money is in the savings. Because what are the guys saving for, you know, maybe he needs a new car or maybe he's thinking, what if I have medical expenses that come up? Or college education. Or college education or all this stuff. There's no way. You don't do that kind of thing without a conversation at least first. Doesn't it just seem more prudent to go, hey, listen, it's my husband's birthday. Maybe we talk about a little Greek trip outside of this. For his birthday, though, just so that everything's on the up and up, I surprise him with something that's like a couple hundred bucks, whatever, five large. It's a lot of dough. Maybe she knows him better than he knows himself, and she knows that he'd never go unless she bought it.

45:44Really? Maybe he's one of those woulda, coulda, shoulda people. That's how Todd is. Sometimes I have to do that. He will never do stuff like that. And then I'd be like, look, we're going. And I force him and then he thanks me later. I would have never done that if it wasn't for you. Maybe that's the case. She's like, man, you're 40. Like, I met you when you were 20. You've been saying this for 20 years. When are you ever going to go? How about she saves up half and, like, surprise me. Like, you know what I've done? I've put away $3,000. Yeah. And now what I want to do is if you can match that, we can go. Right. Or just don't worry. All you did was spend a certain amount. But I've been putting all my savings aside for X amount of months. 570-1949 is our number if you want to comment on that. I don't know if you heard about this, but apparently the headline reads, Jaws Shark found. What does this mean?

46:46It's not in the water. It's the actual mechanical shark from the movie Jaws. Got ripped off or what? Well, they made three of them that they nicknamed Bruce. Yeah. And it's the 35th anniversary, so they wanted to bring back one of the Bruces to have for the 35th anniversary. But they were told by the director that they had all been destroyed. So people wouldn't give up. They were like, no, we're going to find one of the Bruces. And they found out that at Universal Studios, you know how they had that... Jaws ride. I don't think it's still around. Is it still there? Oh, yeah. I was on it like about a year and a half ago. But a few years ago, they took down the fake jaws that hung by its tail, I guess, for a really long time. Yeah. And that was an exact replica that they made of the bruises. So that was the fourth fake jaw shark. Yeah. And this thing is huge. Like, its jaw alone is the size of a human. Ugh. Like, and the head is 400 pounds. So they found one of them in a junkyard in Southern California. And they brought in the people that created the original bruises. And they said, yeah, this is it. This is real. This is it.

47:48Imagine, like, walking through a junkyard looking for cool stuff. Bruce! Hey, Bruce. Let's see. M1 Chemistry from San Clemente is calling in about the whole, I bought a very expensive gift for my spouse deal. Yeah, what up, guys? Not too much. My wife did something similar about five years ago. Our buddies were getting married in Costa Rica. I had kind of written out that we couldn't go. We couldn't afford it. We both just finished school, started working, like, six months prior. You know, there's also those people, though. I gotta say, chemistry, I appreciate how much fun you had. There are also those people, though, man, that if they're that tightwad... they're never going to enjoy it because they know how much it costs. You know those people? But it sounds like you're not, which is good. It's good that you didn't get upset. Go ahead. He's 40 years old now. He's no spring chicken anymore. He's still young, but they've got to do this while they can go out and really enjoy it. 15 years from now, they'll enjoy it, I'm sure, but I don't think they're going to have as much energy and whatnot. Hold on just a minute. Chemistry.

49:16Did you just say that he's 43, which is not a spring chicken? 40. 40? 40? Your age, Mike. 40 is not a spring chicken? Your exact age. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. I'm old. I'm old. I'm old. I'm old. I'm old. I'm old. You would go to Greece and sit in your hotel room anyway. I know, but I never in a thousand years would imagine that I'd be the guy that I'm not a spring chicken. I'm not a spring chicken. Oh, stop it. I'm not. All of you guys are still spring chickens for crying out loud. No, Sienna's a spring chicken. Sienna is a spring chicken. Yeah. Kids lived hard, dude. You know that. You're the body of a seven-year-old man. Please. Oh, yeah, Sienna. Yes. I did it for you guys. Where did you get it? I finally loaded it myself. Yeah. Woods kept saying, I'm going to burn you the Crazy Heart soundtrack. I'm going to burn you one. For months. And I'm like, okay, you know what? I'm going to do it myself. I'll burn it for you. You are listening to Jeff Bridges and Colin Farrell. I love this song. Freaking great. Did you have it too? What? Did you have it too? No, I'm waiting for it from you. Give me a blank. I'll do it right now. I'm waiting for two months. Oh.

50:23I have to inform you guys of something, all of you. When we come back, I'm going to draw your names from a hat. Uh-oh. Oh, boy. These are the names that are going to the hat. Sienna, Woods, Lauren, and Jay. And then I'm going to draw a name, and whoever's name I draw, you're going to have to attempt something on the spot. Done. I'm afraid, Mike. We'll do it next. Be a part of the Mikey Show now. 570-1949. Or text 949Mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Tribal Seeds comes to San Diego Saturday, June 12th. The official summer kickoff concert at Soma, San Diego. It's the reggae, rock, ska, and punk event of the year. It's five bands. It's all ages. It's only $15. It's Tribal Seeds.

51:36Tribal Seeds, June 12th at Soma. Doors open at 6 p.m. with One Drop, Bucket of Fish, Fortunate Youth, The Divine Crime, and Tribal Seeds. The Reggae Rock Ska and Punk Fest at Soma. Come down for the All Ages Summer Kickoff Concert, Saturday, June 12th. Doors open at 6 p.m. with five bands, including Tribal Seeds. For Tribal Seed tickets and show information, visit Somasandiego.com or TribalSeeds.net. On an all-new Fox Monday. There's no lie too big. No crime too small. We're literally going after a candy burglar. It's the premieres of Lie to Me and The Good Guys. First, Dr. Cal Lightman is back as the world's foremost expert in deception detection. How can you tell when I stop lying? He shut your mouth. But when he faces a student with a dark secret. You killed that missing girl. Finding the truth could be deadly. You're gonna lose this game. It's the summer premiere of...

52:42Lie to Me. Then, it's the new action comedy that rocks The Good Guys. You got a war-enforced storage unit, found a body, then came under fire from an unknown assailant. And then everything exploded. Critics rave crime and comedy do mix. Bringing up the big guns on that one. Big guns is all I care. Bradley Whitford and Colin Hanks star in The Good Guys, premiering right after the summer premiere of Lie to Me. It all starts tonight at 8 p.m. on Fox 5 San Diego. Ovation customers tell their stories best. Would a bazillion thanks be enough? I'm in love. Ovation has delivered the results as advertised. The texture of my hair has changed for the best. I won't use anything else on my hair, I promise. Thanks a bazillion, Ovation. For healthier, shinier, more manageable hair, log on to OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout for a special discount. That's OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout. For real results guaranteed, Ovation works. Stop dry, brittle, damaged hair. Grow thicker, stronger, longer hair. Faster. Guaranteed. With Ovation Cell Therapy. I had extensions that completely ruined my hair. But with Ovation, the breakage stopped and the hair is shiny and healthier than ever. Everyone asks and I'm happy to tell them, Ovation, Ovation, Ovation. For healthier hair, log on to OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout. For a special discount, that's OvationHair.com and enter FM94.9 at checkout. Ovation works.

54:10Mosquitoes transmit West Nile virus. Fight the bite. Cover up. Use insect repellent. Prevent mosquito breeding by draining standing water. And report green swimming pools. Call San Diego County Vector Control at 858-694-2888 or text PEST to 75309. Wow, what's that? A new car? Yeah, I just got it. What kind of car is it? It's a Volkswagen Eos hardtop convertible. Wow, that's a Volkswagen? Where'd you get it? I got it at Classic VW in Escondido. It was so worth shopping at Classic. I went online and looked for a Better Business Bureau accredited VW dealer and found that Classic Volkswagen is the only VW dealer in San Diego County with an A+. That's A plus rating by the Better Business Bureau. Why would I go anywhere else? I was going to get a Jetta, and then I looked at the new Beetle convertible. But you know us girls, we have the right to change our minds. So when the super friendly classic salesperson showed me the Eos, I was all done. Classic VW in Escondido. Did you get a good deal? Huh, I got the best deal ever. My parents got it for me.

55:24Maybe your parents aren't getting you a Volkswagen, but you will still be able to get a great deal for yourself on any new or certified pre-loved Volkswagen at Classic VW in the Escondido Auto Park or on the web at ClassicVW.com. Ratings as of 42810. Make sure your low fares stay low to St. Louis with no bag fees from Southwest Airlines. Grab your bag. It's on nonstop from San Diego to St. Louis. Book your nonstop flights to St. Louis now at Southwest.com. Weight and size limits apply. This report, it's brought to you by the Port of San Diego. Did you know the maritime cargo terminals in San Diego and National City move goods that generate jobs and spread prosperity? To find out more, go to portofsandiego.org. Encinitas looks like the five southbound before Lucadia Boulevard. We've got a couple pieces of metal in the number four lanes. A couple cars have pulled over on that right shoulder, so be careful as you approach. The 805 southbound between Claremont Mesa Boulevard and El Cajon, we've got some congestion, about 40 miles an hour. And the 94 westbound between the 805 and G Street, we've got a little slowing as well. This report, it is brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners, San Diego Toyota dealerships have a 2495 lube oil and filter replacement for United States Armed Forces members and veterans, including immediate family. See your dealer for details. I'm Stacey Cohen.

56:44FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego. A Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Sienna is going old school on her musical. You love when I do this. Mikey Show. Mikey Show is five people. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. We got Woodsy. We got Lauren. We got Sienna. We got Jay. Otherwise known as Jacef. Jaybird. Yay. I call him Yay. Yay. Yaybird. He's got quite a few nicknames. Welcome back to the show. Okay. So, I'm going to play this for you. And then we're going to do something. We're going to draw a name. But first, let me play this. Stromor. Stromor. Oh, no. What? Oh, boy. Laptop's down. Spelling bee. It's down. It's burning. Oh, this is bad news. I'm burning. Crazy heart. It's burning. I'm not looking at it. It's down. See?

57:51National Spelling Bee took place this weekend. 2010 Scripps National Spelling Bee, right? Yeah. The word is Stromor. We'll see who has to spell it. I'm reaching into a hat. This is not fair. I'm reaching into a hat. Oh, no, you don't. The word is Stromor. We don't need definitions. We got this. You're the English major, Woods. Come on. You got this, Woodsy. Can I have a definition? No. Really? I'm going to Strohmore you. Can you use it in a sentence? No. Strohmore. Strohmore courage in that one. Does anyone even know what it means? Strohmore courage? Yeah. Strohmore. S-T-R-O-U-M-O-R-E. Are you going to the mall later? Again, Woodsy spelling.

58:52Of Stromor. I tried something different. Yeah, I would have done that, though. S-T-R-O-U-M-O-R-E. Let's see who gets it right. S-T-R-O-M-U-H-R. Stromor. Wow. Wow is right, dude. How do you do that? Wow is right. She is the 2010 Scripps National Spelling Bee Champion. from North Royalton, Ohio. Ohio, baby. Dude, I do not know how these kids do it. I want to meet someone just on the street one day that's like, oh yes, when I was 15 or 14, I was the spelling bee champion. I'd be like, spell this. The rest of their life, they're going to have to spell everything every day. Why don't you call Mrs. Woods? Oh, she won? She was a... seventh or eighth grade spelling bee champion of Bedford, Texas. Nice. Yeah, I had a girl. And to this day? To this day, still runs mouth about it. Well, will she still kill it, too? She's a pretty good speller. I wouldn't have married her if she wasn't. Really? You know that. Yeah, that's true. I was like, you were talking about your mom this whole time. I was like, you married her? No, my wife. No, in fact, Woodsy has dumped girls before because they couldn't spell very well or...

1:00:06grammatically incorrect. They don't know the difference between your and your. And your. Yeah. There and there. Pretty sure I've seen the kid make that mistake on Facebook. Yeah, I did one time, but I was, you know. Yeah, Woodsy had a girl tell him one time through an email that he was a looser. Yeah, you are a looser. Looser. And he was like, really? It's over. See you later. It's over. Because you're a tighter. Yeah. And then the other one that she did, you know the word coup d'etat? Yeah. It was a coup d'etat. She spelled it K-U space. D-A-Y space T-A. Wow. And I wrote back, I go, are you kidding me? It's not even close. You know what she said? What? It's a made-up word. Doesn't matter. That was a made-up word. Like you made it up. Yeah, we made it up. Coup de ca. Definitely over. It's a French saying. See you later. I love that. So, Sienna, there was a... Armed robbery at a taco shop over the weekend? Yes, in Lemon Grove on Saturday night. A man with a handgun that was tucked into his waistband robbed a taco shop. It was Rosarito Mexican food on Lemon Grove Avenue and showed the clerk the gun, demanded cash. It was pretty bad. Well, we've made jokes before about how I used to enjoy a few tacos myself. Used to? Used to?

1:01:20And so I wonder what it would have been like if obese Mikey had been this guy. I have a gun. Give me everything with beef. Give me food. Sir, you have a gun, you said? Yeah. Yeah, and I'll use it. I'm not afraid. Do you want money? Are you robbing us? No, I won't. I want tacos and burritos and fachata and everything. Give me it all. Sir, there's a safe here with $50,000. Just please don't hurt me. I don't want money. I want, uh, give me, give me, give me chips. Sir, please, please, just do not hurt me. Give me dip. Don't hurt me, sir. Guacamole. Sir, please, you're making me very nervous. Take the hoagie out of your mouth and please drive around. Give me food. That's what it might have sounded like. I don't want the 50,000. I want the horchata. That's fantastic. Woodsy, what was that thing that we went to this weekend in Solana Beach? What was that thing?

1:02:44Fiesta del Sol. Fiesta del Sol. Oh, that's what. It's a sun party. It's a party of the sun. L.O.B., you were there. Yeah. Thanks for saying hi. I know. Well, where were you? I was in the VIP area. You know that. You were rocking at VIP? Yeah. Were you really? I could have gotten you guys in if you just gave me a word. What? What is up with that? Belly up. Really? Up style. Yeah. She offered that to me, too. I said, well, I've got a bunch of people. Well, no kids allow Jay. I know. I'm sorry. It was a 21 and up area. Really? Mm-hmm. Easy big time. Yeah. Yeah. Well. We sent Wolfgang out there. Yeah. So in just a little bit, you'll be hearing Wolfgang talk to people out on the street at the Fiesta del Sol. You guys ready for Name That Tune? Oh, yeah. Pick a horse. 570-1949. Call us right now. 570-1949. I'm sure we have some anarchy sunglasses and some angel sunglasses to give away. And Jay will come in here and he will run the controls. Right, Jay? Here he comes. Yes, sir. And we've got the tickets to see Phoenix. Oh! ESTSU Open Air Theater. This is a, yeah, this is a winner before you can buy them. Nice. Wow. Nice. That's amazing. All right. 570-1949. You're either going to pick me, Sienna, Woodsy, or Lauren. I don't even, I don't know what the, what is the, what's the topic today? Is it movies? Is it music? What is it?

1:04:02It's number one songs from the 90s. Oh, snap. I'm going to do great. I will not do great. I will not do well. Should we talk about who won the last time we played? Or the time before that? Well, Lauren actually had a legitimate win. Legit. She smoked us. Yeah, Lauren killed us. And she beat us. That's right. And she won the contest. You ready? We use our name as a buzzer. Oh, gosh. We use our name as a buzzer. Here we go. I'm nervous. Here we go. Wait, wait, wait. Don't we have to get that? It takes too long. Oh, okay. Yeah, he's locking him down. Okay. Let's get right to it. Let's go. Okay, here we go. Woods. Mikey. Woods. Nirvana. Smells like teen spirit. Off the album, Nevermind. Oh, stop it. Produced by Butch Vig. Wow. What's up, dude? Spell strumba. All right, here we go. Lauren. Lauren. The Verve. Very nice. Steve Albini, by the way. That was crazy. That was so fast. Here we go. Whitey. Black Hole Sun Soundgarden. What's the score? 2-1. Woods 2, Lauren 1. Here we go. Did you understand that even? Yeah. Mikey. R-E-M. Mikey! Stop! I like to cheer for Mike because we share a microphone.

1:05:34Goose. Here we go. Here we go. Woods. Woods. House of Pain. Nice. That was great. Wow. What's the score? Score. Lauren one. Woods three. Mike two. It's a close match. Here we go. That makes sense. Woods. Lauren. Back. Great job. That was fast. That was fast. Here we go. This is a tough one. Scary. Lauren. Mike. Lauren. Gangster's Paradise. Dang it. Oh, good one. Man. That had a long intro. Woods and Lauren tied with three. Mike has two. Okay, here we go. Lauren. Really? Yeah. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. One, two, three. Oh, that was close.

1:06:51Sorry, I was going to say Bumblebee. Bumblebee. Oh, my gosh. Here we go. Look at Woods giving me the stink eye. Here we go. Woods. What? Here we go. Oh, my gosh. Woods. Extreme. Lauren, four. Woods, five. Mikey, two. Sienna, 100. Here we go. I'm going to nail it right now. I'm going to do this. This is it. This is a serious time. Woods. That's Soul Asylum. Woods! I'm going to need a recap. Woods, I mean, Jay, are we doing points with more? Right now, I think we're all pretty evenly matched. Alright, okay, okay. Here we go. Lauren. Woods. Oh, Woods, you know this. Here we go. Lauren. Reach out and touch me. Wow! Oh, personal juice.

1:07:56What? It exists. What? Woods. The best one. How many guesses she gets? She gets nothing. Woods. Go ahead. That is the best one. That knocked Lauren to the ground. Man. I said person. No, you never said personal Jesus. She did after her third. Yeah, after her third. You said in excess. That's my first guess. Let's just name a bunch of songs. I said personal Jesus, then I said in excess. No, you said reach out and touch face. Oh, yeah, you're right. I did. Yeah, that's not close to what the song's called. Here we go. Darn it. Here we go. Lauren. Seal. I should have got it just because I don't have a mic right in front of my face. That's true. Okay, here we go. There is one, two, three, four more. Oh, my gosh. Oh, God, I'm going to puke. You can't touch this. MC Hammer. Wait a minute. I didn't come to you. Yes! You got it. No, I didn't. I got it. But I have to acknowledge you. No, I was obviously first. There's no obvious in this game.

1:08:58You got to get called. I thought it was good. So Lauren was right behind you. What do you got, Lauren? MC Hammer can't touch this. Wow, I really lost a point for that. Yeah, you really did. You know the rules. You know the rules. Here we go. He's mad. The kid's mad. This is a tough one. What? Wow. That's Big Audio Dynamite. Lauren. Lauren. Unbelievable. It's E-F-E-M-F. E-M-F. Yep. Lauren, seven. Woods, five. Mike, two. Sienna still has 100. It's weird. How many left? We have two left. What's the score? I just told you. One more time. Lauren, seven. Woods, five. Mike, two. Oh, gosh. Here we go. Chris Isaac. This could end up a tie. That was good. It's the hardest game to play. He's so good. His brain works so fast. I'm losing right now. Okay, last song. Here we go. Spice Girls. That's a tie game right there. What do we do? We flip a coin. Tie goes to the girl. Mike, you could give him another word to spell. That was nerve-wracking. Why don't we do this? I did really good. Hey, Jay. Jay, how many prizes do we have? I have enough to give both of our competitors. There we go.

1:10:39We'll give one to Jesse, and we will give one to M1S-Dog. Well played. And she was hot today. Congratulations, S-Dog. Thank you. And congratulations, Jesse. Thanks, guys. Yeah, very well done. Hang on the line. Great. Great. Are you ready for Wolfgang out at Fiesta del Sol? You know that. Wolfgang went to Fiesta del Sol just to talk to some people, see what's going on, and get the latest on what's happening in our world right now. I may not be that interested in it, am I? But Sex and the City was the number one movie this weekend. Let's take a listen to Wolfgang talking about it. Okay, great. This is Wolfgang from The Michael Show. I'm standing here with Heather Ann. Where are you from?

1:11:37San Diego. I thought you said you was not local. I'm not Solana Beach local. Right, me neither. So, have you seen The New Sex in the City? No, but I'm meeting two. Did you like the first one? I loved it. Who is your favorite character? Samantha. Mine too. Is it because Samantha's very, what is the word I'm looking for? Whore-ish? No, that's not the word. That's my favorite reason why I like her. She's the funniest. She is definitely the funniest. What do you think of Carrie Bradshaw? She's got a big nose. She does. I always say when she comes on the screen, why is it a long face? Okay, great. So you are going to see the movie or no? Definitely. Okay, great. You're going to take your beautiful boyfriend over there? Yes, definitely. Okay. Well, thank you so much for your time. Thank you. Welcome at Fiesta del Sol. Making it right. Doing his thing. Love him. You know, he really stands out, though, when he's wearing a little pair of jean cutoff shorts and a bikini top.

1:12:39That's strange. Weird dude. Why would he wear that? That's kind of what Wolfgang does. I guess. He had also bleached his hair. Just the tips. Just the tips. Frosted. And you could tell he kind of left it that way after he washed his hair. He kind of did a shampoo mohawk and left it that way. I saw him out there, so I know. I had a turkey leg out at Fiesta del Sol. Did you? You sure did. I sure did, right, Woodsy? You sure did. I had corn. You did. That corn's fantastic. It's so good. It's the best. Barbecue sauce all over my face. Didn't care. For sure. Cotton candy. I'm glad you guys all had a great time without me. I had chocolate-covered cheesecakes. You guys all live in a little bubble together, and I'm on the outside. If it makes you feel better. You're not in the bubble. I'm on the outside. You're in the bubble. I'm in my own bubble. You are invited to every single thing that happens. Sienna, one can only get turned down so many times. You know what? I don't like getting on the freeway and driving all the way up there. There you go. Deanna, they're the only two that went together. Of course. Well, I heard in the end. Hang on. Before you start doing that, we're in love and all that. Listen. I called everybody. I always do. And Woodsy said L.O.B. was going to be there. And so we got there. He's playing endless love. And nobody told me that you were there. I sent Woodsy a text message. Hey, where are you guys? Oh, we left.

1:14:07Oh, thanks for saying hi. Yeah, you guys were there for like 30 minutes. We weren't there long. I got to get some audio. Mikey wanted a turkey leg, so we made the trip. Very true. It's not that big event, but I could not find you guys. I saw Jay. It's a lot of people. 570-1949 if you want to give us a call. Do you guys know what a black Amex car it is? Oh, yeah. American Express. Jay-Z has one. I'm sure. Well, I've never really understood the... I never really stood the concept behind American Express, because we were talking about this before, that with American Express, you've got to pay it. At the end of the month, you've got to pay the whole bill, right? Never have one. Yeah, I mean, it's not like a credit card where you pay it in installments or whatever. You've got to, I mean... You're on loan to yourself, basically. Well, this is what I don't understand, though, is if that's the concept, why not just use a Visa or MasterCard and then pay it off? I think because of the... Then you don't have the temptation of not paying it off and then having the interest carry on there. Is that why people do it? Usually it's for people that are like ballers that are like, well, I'm not going to carry that much cash around. Diddy. Yeah. The black one's a big deal. The black one's a status symbol because the black one's the highest one that you can get. And it actually.

1:15:19Like waves. Metal. It's heavy. It's super heavy in your hand. I want one so bad. I knew what you would be in on that. It's made of anodized titanium. I can't get a J.C. Penney card. I can't get a J.C. Penney card. My credit is ridiculously bad. Well, you shouldn't be going to J.C. Penney. Is it bigger? Is the black one bigger? No. J? Really, J? It's bigger, J. It seems like it would be. That's what I hear. I don't know. Oh, here it is. It is. It's thicker. Once you go back, you never go back. It's thicker and heavier. So what's the deal with the Amex card? It goes longer, too. First of all, when I found this article last night. Excuse me. Lauren is especially giggling at all those jokes, by the way. She loves them weird. She loves them weird. I found this article last night, and I had a dream that I had one of these cards came in the mail last night. Sierra, you're now a baller. Mom!

1:16:12Thanks, Mom, for hooking it up. And Seth, I'm going to need one, too. Well, let me just tell you a couple cool things about this car. Not only is it anodized titanium. Did I say that right? Yeah. It's heavier, but it gives you benefits, including automatic first-class upgrades on airline flights, a personal shopper in major cities worldwide, top-of-the-line concierge and travel agent service, the first crack at elite shows and sporting events, and after-hours privileges at elite stores and boutiques. Really? Worldwide. Wow. That's like ballers have these cards. Plus respect everywhere you go. Yeah. Yeah. So up until 2006, you had to be invited to have one of these cards. Now it's not like that anymore. Which probably means that you used to have to be an Amex holder for 45 years. Yeah. I mean. Or a celebrity or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But now you can actually apply. What you do is you call American. Yeah, you call Amex. It's not as cool. Yeah, it isn't. Well, you have to meet this criteria. Have a nearly blemish-free credit history. Nope. Done. Spend at least $250,000 annually on a current Amex, Platinum, or Gold card. Now, just so you know, that's $21,000 a month. Whoa. A month. That's insanity. Except a one-time card membership fee of $5,000 along with an annual fee of $2,500. Why would you do that?

1:17:35Because you're just a pimp. You're so rich. You're a pimp. Yeah. And have a major net worth. They don't tell you how much, but you need to be worth a lot. Yeah. There you go. Good luck, peeps. I couldn't even qualify for the plastic sleeve they send it in. Yeah, for sure. There's no way. Did you guys hear that Miley Cyrus is being talked about because she... Kiss some girl on stage. Now, I haven't seen this. You said you saw it, right, Mike? Yeah, it was on Britain's Got Talent. It was on Britain's Got Talent. Yesterday, it was one of the deals on foxnews.com. And a lot of thoughts on it. Number one, I thought, okay, so we get it. You're really adult now, aren't you? Number two, I went, said, like, isn't that bit 10 years old? Yeah. Isn't she 10 years old? No. Yeah, I mean both. Isn't she 10 and isn't the bit 10 years old? Like, when Madonna and Britney did it, it was stupid to me. It's very provocative. Well, that's what she momicked. Momicked. Momicked. She mimicked Madonna. I combined Madonna and mimic. Momicked. She mimicked Madonna and Britney Spears' kiss. Right. I just hate Miley Cyrus at 17 now.

1:18:51But she did this on Thursday on Britain's Got Talent. And basically what she did was she like leaned towards one of her female dancers and they pretended to kiss. Now, as you know, I didn't see it that way because I watched it. No, it wasn't. I mean, I said to my wife yesterday, I go, it's not that big a deal. But by saying that, I certainly don't mean like, oh, it's OK. I still think it's stupid. And I think it's a it's pretty it sucks that little kids are watching it that are into her that watch the. her stupid Hannah Montana, and they're like, oh, I should be kissing chicks. Oh, boy, I know. But anyway, what it is, it's a dip. She, like, dips her. Yeah. And looks at her like, I'm going to kiss you. There's no lip-to-lip contact, but as you can imagine, parents are not happy because, yeah, she is on the Disney Channel. At least, I mean, she's finishing Hannah Montana. She's done with the child image, and she's trying to break free. I mean, remember Christina Aguilera? Why don't you break free by doing something? original different yeah like that's such a worn out and aside from it being worn out it it makes you look like not only are you not original that you're just really desperate to get people to talk about how crazy you are and she knows people are going to talk about it and people are not going to talk about it in a good way no they're going to talk about what a joke you are like who's going to say would you see that kiss that was hot she wants to be a bad girl now she does yeah but what's going to happen is is that now she's going to get her feelings hurt

1:20:15When people talk about her being a dirtbag. Yeah. If anybody talks about her being a dirtbag, she's going to get really upset about it. And people are going to go, well, then why are you doing stupid bits on stage four that are unoriginal and dumb? Yeah. Why are you doing that? I don't know if it was planned or not, but I can't see her choreographer or whoever like working that in the mix. They know her. They know how people react. Yeah. There's probably a very farty sex tape in the near future, I would imagine. I hope that. Come on. You should not be saying those three words together. Farty sex tape. Ew. You just made me nauseous. So nauseous. 5701949 is our number. Or you can text us if you want to. It is 949mikey at gmail.com if you want text. Sienna picking the music. Is this the original or is this Biggie or P. Diddy? It's not Biggie. Oh, okay. It's a police. I got you. Good. You know what I'm talking about. Okay. Are we all in agreement, by the way, that when the guy got the call wrong, the Empire got the call wrong last week with the Detroit Tiger pitcher? What's his name? Galarraga? Yeah. Armando Galarraga. We're all in agreement that that stunk, right? Yeah. That he got the perfect game taken away from him? Yeah.

1:21:38Are we all in agreement that it was kind of cool that the ump manned up about it? Yep. Said he was sorry and was very like... Cried. Yeah, and said, I took one away from that kid. I took one away from that kid and I feel like a jerk. Apologized and the whole deal. So are we all on the same page that, hey, listen, it stunk that it happened, but the way that it turned out was kind of cool? Yeah. Wait until you hear what this CNBC anchor Mark Haynes had to say about it. Extraordinarily controversial. We will talk about it. What he said on TV is freaking crazy. I can't wait. It's next. Oh, my God. It's better than I thought. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. We ask people on the street.

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1:27:21With free nightly concerts throughout the summer. Go to VegasExperience.com for a complete lineup of concerts. 94 Eastbound before Broadway. Looks like some people out for a morning walk on the side of the road. Be careful, they're over on that right shoulder. Also, the 5 Northbound after the 905. We've got plastic that's scattered across the number 2 lane. And in Oceanside on the 5 Northbound California Street. We've got a car that's lost a front wheel. It's still on that California Street on ramp. This report, it is brought to you by USAA. Switch to USAA Auto Insurance. You can save an average of $461 a year in premiums. Find out how at USAA.com slash car. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Good morning to you. This is Bird from Dragon Eyewear with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for this Monday morning. Being brought to you by Guayaki Yerba Mate. This morning we're looking at just a gradual decrease in that combination of swells out of both the west, northwest, and southwest. That is giving top open areas occasional waves in that either waist-high zone, chest-high sets can be found, but on the inconsistent basis, that's for sure. Beach break's looking to be your better bet, especially now as that tide is a bit higher. A little cross the peaks and some lines there as well, a bit more focus on those setways when it comes through.

1:28:43Tide's a bit hot right now, too, so that's backing off the reef breaks, but generally speaking, they're a little bit smaller and crossed up anyways. Overcast skies are upon us right now as we speak, and we do have a little bit of a calm, a slight soft wind, but that's not really affecting surface textures too much at all. Water count's fairly warm, I guess, for this time of the year, running about 63 degrees, so there are rideable waves to be had. Nothing special, but better than work. For up-to-the-minute surf reports, forecasts, go to surfline.com, and for everything you need in order to go surf, Check out one of South Coast Surfshops, five locations, or go online at southcoast.com. This surf report is being brought to you by Guayaquil, Yerba Mate, and it can only be heard three times daily, right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. If I like rock music and you bring up Hinder, the Hinder card, I can't go any further. Woods. I don't admit very often when I'm wrong. Lauren. I like looking at boobs. Sienna. I can hit some mean wiffle balls in our yard. And Jay. I can make 100 hush puppies in like 30 seconds. On FM 94.9. Picking the music, you're hearing some stones, some brown sugar. I'd be like that one. All right, so we were saying that we were all in agreement about what happened last week. We were talking about this deal with the blown call. Yep. Nobody's heard about it by now.

1:30:36Blown call, Detroit Tigers, Galarraga's pitching. Jim Joyce, the umpire. Jim Joyce, the umpire, and it's a perfect game. Yep. Until Jim Joyce gets the wrong call and screws everything up. Yep. Well, he felt terrible about it. He apologizes for it. I thought he manned up. Big time. Because he had a choice. What he could have done is what a lot of people do, and that's just, you know, it's my call. It's the way I saw it, blah, blah, blah. But he said no. I blew the call. I blew it. He goes, that kid threw a perfect game and I took it away from him. He went from like he could have been the most hated to like I kind of love him. I was really, when I saw him come out last week and he was crying at home plate and Galarraga brought the lineup card out, I told you on the air, I was a changed man immediately. I was like, yep. Changed man. You own up to your mistake. And this is what was cool is that, you know. At first, I think Woodsy was kind of like all of us when we were going, hey, man, listen, that was a stupid move. You blew that game, blah, blah, blah. But you couldn't help but love the way that it turned out. Well, CNBC's talking about it. This lady's name is Erin Burnett. She's talking about it with this clown named Mark Haynes, also from CNBC. They're talking about it. And listen to what happens. The ump admitted to make a mistake. He hugged the pitcher. He wasn't mad. And doesn't America need moments?

1:31:54graciousness like that a little bit more frequently. How about a moment where a guy celebrates a perfect game? Hey, you know, mistakes happen, but everyone admitted it. I thought it was handled so beautifully that it was a more memorable moment for its failure, perhaps, and its success. I don't know. Maybe a little sentimental? See, this is why women aren't in charge of sports. Oh, my gosh. LLB just shut down. Really? This is why women are not in charge of sports. We're too emotional. That's what it is. See, this is why women aren't in charge of sports. Oh, my. You know what? I think that this is a moment that should be passed over at this moment. I got a laugh out of Brad. Brad loved it. Because Brad thought that there might be a punch thrown on this set and maybe we'd be in the UFC championships up here. Let's get to the floor of the nicey with Matt Nesto. She did great. He just guffawed on that one, Aaron. Oh, my Lord. Kind of a douchey thing to say. I think that guy's going to take a little heat off the air from her. Dug himself deeper. Well, her and he's also been taking some heat in general. 100.

1:33:12So the next day, he is called out on the remark by somebody else at CNBC. I noticed that you're trying to obstugate the... Obstugate? Obstugate. He's just trying to confuse him. That's a smart word. I never used it, never heard it in my life. For you to say, the issue yesterday about... not having women running major sports leagues, I find that to be quite objectionable. Perhaps if that woman had been an umpire there, they might not have had the problem in the first place. I think you owe Ms. Burnett an apology right here, right now. That was a joke, Gordo. That's right. That's right. Who just said that? Oh, Aaron. Who do you think said that? Where's that apology, Haynes? of all types and all walks are entitled to their own opinion. And, you know, some are more educated than others. Well, we can't all be PhDs, Peter. Hey, listen, there's more to this clip, but hey, listen, everybody's entitled to their opinion, but sometimes you give an opinion, you might take some heat for it, right? Yeah, and sometimes your opinion's wrong.

1:34:20I'm just thinking about this guy, Mark Haynes, going home to his wife and having seen what his wife has to say to cheer him up. I bet he has the kind of wife that's like, you were right, honey. Women should not be in charge of spars. I'm so glad that you said that, dear. Catherine Hepburn. That was a wonderful thing that you said. Imagine me in charge of spars. What could I do? Okay. Thank you. Truly representing both sides of this market, Peter and Dr. Gordon. Let's get back up to Aaron. I just want to say, Mark, how about this? You and I engage in a sports competition and, you know. He's pretty chubbly-wubbly. Is he? And she's in shape. I was actually trying to decide if I should say this the whole time. The very first time he opened his mouth, I was like, he sounds like obese Mikey. And I was like, is that mean? But no. I just think I have carrot cake in my mouth. Then we'll have an answer. All right. Arm wrestling. Arm wrestling. How about arm wrestling? All right. I'll take you on. Still think she might win. This guy is like still going on. He's still being a jerk. What a jerk, dude. How about a hot dog eating contest? I'm not going to have any woman put me in my place. Hey, Woodsy said it last week. It's like in every joke.

1:35:43There's just a little stride of truth. There's a stride of truth, right? Well, I'm sure he believes that. I'm sure there's a lot of people out there that agree with him. But if you're in that kind of position, you can't just throw around offensive things like that. I think women could run a sports team. Well, I mean, and the thing is, yeah, what are you looking at me for? There's a lot of women sportscasters that are amazing. Amazing. Robin Roberts is dynamite. Hannah Storm is great. Yeah. That's goofy. What? What? What? She's looking at me like, really? Okay. She thinks I'm a chauvinist pig. I do not. I just think some people enjoy the game more when... When what? When it's a guy calling everything. What would it be like if Monday Night Football or Sunday Night Football, instead of Al Michaels and... Who is it? Who knows now? Oh, Al Michaels and... My brain just went blank. Chris. Chris. Do you not watch Sunday Night Football? I'm going to have to go to bed early because I have to get up and do a Mikey show. Games will be over early here. I like that it's all guys, though. I don't know. I like it better. You know what I mean? It's a man's sport. I would not want to be the girl that's like, yeah, well, I'm going to get involved. See, I like the sideline reporters that are females. I wouldn't like commentating by a woman. And refs? No. On a football field? Well, I guess it all comes down to money.

1:37:10We did like women to be calling games. Wouldn't there be a bunch of women calling games? It comes down to money. It's ratings, right? Yeah. That'd be weird. Or just knowledge of, like, a lot of times those commentators have played before. So, you know, it's kind of hard for a woman to commentate when she, if she hasn't played. Mm-hmm. Man, I felt all guilty saying it. I know, I feel like I'm an awful person. Well, the two girls jumped in there like, I don't want it. Well, obviously there are girls that will disagree. But, you know, I'm just saying that one of the things I like about football is that it's a guy sport. Yeah. Like I said, I like the sideline reporters that know what they're talking about. The Laren Andrews for you. Yeah, I like her. Yeah. Real good. Always the sideline reporters are the good looking girls. Suzy Culber, cute as a button. Yeah. I wonder why. I wonder why. They're good looking. Yeah. Guys like to watch. We like to look at them. Guys like to talk to them. Yeah. It's a win win. It's the same reason that, you know, Fox decided that they were going to do the Jillian Barbary deal. Hey, we're going to suddenly start reporting on weather. You talk about that every morning. Every morning. I do. Yeah. Every morning there's a good looking women reporter on the team. You're like, Jillian Barbary, you know, she started all of that. It's one of my useless facts that I try to.

1:38:25Take out of my wallet every single time. Hey, guys, did you know that Jillian Barber was actually the first to do that? She pioneered. She's a pioneer. She's like Rosa Parks. Pretty girls. Let's see. Sienna has some tips for you if you're trying to lose the LBs. You've been hitting the gym, Mike. You've been doing good. Yeah, and I seem to be gaining weight every week. I wonder if it has anything to do with the eggplant parmesan in my little Tupperware container. That isn't really Tupperware. I call it Tupperware too. What do I do to lose weight? Stop drinking soda? Done. Work out all the time? Done. Stop eating really fattening food? Can't do it. Can't do it either. One of the things I told you according to this article is wrong. What? I can't believe it. What? It tells you that you should step on the scale every day. No way. And I tell you don't do it every day because a trainer once told me that back when I used to work out. Yeah. And they said no because you'll get frustrated because you'll see just there won't be any fluctuations. So you're saying that it's supposed to keep you accountable. Yeah. Does it say about getting on the same time every day? Because I know my weight will fluctuate like a couple pounds within a day. Yeah. It doesn't say that, but that is something that you should do is always get on right when you wake up in the morning. Yeah. If that's your time.

1:39:40Woodsy, if you wanted to, can you drop weight real quick? Yeah. How do you do it? Stop drinking sodas and work out. I dropped 15 pounds back in December, and that's all the way back in. Really? Yeah, it's back on. My jeans were like loose. Now I'm like trying to get them on. Kid's a fat pig. Kid's not a fat pig. Is it because you stopped drinking soda that you lost that weight? Yeah. That's literally all I have to do. Sugars and juices. And I love juices. The kid's drinking energy, five-hour energy. Then he has a Red Bull. Then he has Gatorade. Yeah. And then he's stuffing two donuts in his mouth. Frosted cookies. He's a fat pig. No, you are not a fat pig. Most of the week he goes, hey, man, when are you going to make it right, bring in some donuts. Yeah. I'm going to change my eating habits. Are you? Someday. You know what? Soon. I am soon. Life is short. You're going to the gym. So am I. That's a problem. Well, I know. But you're going to the gym. You cut the sodas. Like, you can do. The food then. Like the surfing and stuff has helped me because it is great cardio. But man, it just takes it out of me, dude. I say try the 80-20 rule. What is that? That's like try to be, try to follow some sort of like what you should be eating 80% of the time, but then allow yourself to, you know, treat yourself. 20% of the time. I like it. You know, you saw my boys that came to visit.

1:41:00Yeah. You saw those guys. Yeah. Chiseled. Yeah. Great. Models. Yeah. Models. These guys, what they do is they do six days a week of eating chicken breast, tuna, a lot of protein. They work out, you know, once a day for they really work out five days a week, but they eat right. Six. Seventh day, they feast on friggin calzones and tiramisu and whatever they want. Yeah. I've heard that. There's nothing wrong with that. That's a great thing to know, because those dudes, they're not like bodybuilders or. They just look great. Lean. So that's a great point to know. What do they do? Same thing with a girl. If you see a girl that she just looks dynamite, you might ask her, what are you up to? What are you doing? You know what I mean? If she's in really good shape, what are you doing? All the toned. Same thing with a dude. What do you do? That's a good idea. What else do they say? Turn off the TV. Do you watch TV when you eat? Like dinner? Oh, yeah. Me too. I sit in front of the TV. Me too. I do not. Well, they say that apparently because of these new studies, it's distracting. Also texting while driving and driving when you're eating and stuff like that causes you to eat more. Like you don't, you're not paying attention if you're full or not. Yeah. So you just keep doing it. So turn off the TV when you're eating. Just focus on your meal. And don't drive and eat. Maybe run in place while you eat. Run in place. Eat on the treadmill. You're supposed to sit down when you eat. I know that.

1:42:27You're not supposed to stay. Well, you know the new bit for me from working on this show and having about a minute and a half to eat a full meal is when I get home and it's dinner time, I'm done. By the time Jamie's done loading our plate, I'm like... And I'm done. I always have. You do, Elleby? Oh, my gosh. My mom, all growing up, slow down, chew. All her parents tell us that. Aren't you supposed to chew each bite like 23 times or something? My mom's a slow... She's like... Enjoys every single bite. Slays me. We mentioned it before, too, that we go to a fast food place and we're such pigs. We can't even wait. We're unwrapping hamburgers in the bag with one hand hot. We're unwrapping it with one hand like we're Houdini getting it out of there. Yeah, right. Those fries are going to make it home. Yeah, right. You know what Chubbs McGee over here did yesterday? What? Speaking of myself. Yeah, I was driving to my baseball game and I'm like, man, I remember the two hamburger rule. I had two cheeseburgers from Mickey D's once and got a bunch of hits, knocked in a bunch of rounds. Yeah, back on that bit. Really? Yeah, feasted on two burgers in about five minutes. And what happened in this game? I was one for five, three strikeouts. I left eight men on base. Wow. It's awful. But it's just like reason to go. Struck out to end the game with the bases loaded. Yeah, just amazing. Maybe you have a power bar. Yeah, maybe a granola bar. Maybe you start the granola bar role. Oh, I'm growing the mustache back.

1:43:50I was hitting everything with a stache. It's coming back. Are you really? Or I'm going to just paste one on for my attack. Oh, my. M1 Mike from PB. You there? Oh, he was, and he had advice. Oh, Mike. How bad? I bet he's ripped. Yeah. I don't think you have to work out every day, Mikey, but what I try to do is I try to do something every day. Like, I'll go, you know, ride my bike, you know, just not even that hard of a ride, but just to get the motor pumping. Just do something, yeah. Even if it's a walk. Walk. Man, that's. That's determination. Do you do that, Jay? I do it every day, yeah. You have to. I have to. If I don't, I'm in a bad mood. Yeah, to make you a nicer person. Before I was pregnant, I actually...

1:44:31kept the diary and I read about this Carrie Underwood does it and that's like her main secret to staying so thin is because if you keep a diary you write down every single thing that you eat on a piece of paper and it's like if you eat a donut or like maybe 12 you don't want to write that down because then you see exactly every single thing and it's a mental thing you're like oh I don't want to see that I ate that I just want to do it and forget that I did so if you actually do it and you're really good about writing down everything it helps I lost a lot of weight doing it Absolutely true. I bet this guy knows how to do it. Hey, if it isn't Mr. 38-year-old six-pack abs. Hey, you know what to do. He drank that six-pack. Yeah. You know what to do, man. Yeah. HGH. HGH? Really? Is that how you do it? That's secure. What's that what you do? It's called human growth hormone. It's currently illegal in the States. It's just ridiculous. Gross. HGH, you guys see these abs? All right, don't show me your abs. Every time. Topper comes in here. He's 38 years old. His tongue is pierced. Stop playing with it. He drives a Hummer, and he's got a MySpace page because he's kind of a creep. I got big news. What? I got a phone call. From? BP. From BP Oil. Yeah, and I got a great idea.

1:45:53Well, first of all, why did they call you? They need some help. And they called you Topper. Yeah, they called me, and I'm going down next week. You think you'd get time off from the movie theater? Yeah. What are your qualifications, Dwayne? Well, here's what I'm doing. If you weren't listening last time, Jay actually busted Topper at a movie theater working. If I told you guys, dude, it's for a freaking reality show. Yeah, sure it is. Can't wait to see that show. And he also noticed that AMC didn't let him put Topper on his name tag, so he had to use his real name. It's my pseudo name, dude. It's my pen name. You ever hear of a pen name? Really? Your pen name's Dwayne? You ever hear of the guy's name's Mark Twain? His real name was Samuel Clemens. That's the only thing I remember from seventh grade. I'd find Twain more believable than Dwayne. Yeah, me too. Except that Dwayne is the... The real deal. You guys want to maybe zip it?

1:46:47That's okay. Sorry, Dwayne. What are you doing with BP? I'm taking a bunch of my girls, my ladies, my dimes, taking them down there. And I'm going to host a wet t-shirt contest for all the people down there cleaning up the deal, man. Because, you know, they need a little... That's your way to give back. It's my way to give back, dude. You're a filthy pervert. Yeah, I got 10 girls. They're all coming down. We're going to do wet t-shirt contests. We're going to do tequila drinking competitions. I think they have more important things. to do. I'm bringing a barber's chair and I'm going to put him in a barber's chair, drink tequila, spin him around. Your pants are almost... All the way. Pull them up. Don't worry about it. I see your plaid boxer shorts. I got a new tattoo. Don't show that. It's the sun around my belly button. You like it? It's so nasty. It's all red and swollen. Look at that. It's like crusty. It's the sun. You know what else is gross? Is that they shaved right around the belly button so they could put the tattoo there. It's a sun. How you doing a little bit? Don't look at her that way. It's gross. It's so weird. Look at the little zebra on there. The little zebra shirt. Yeah, don't worry about it. Zebra print.

1:47:52Zebras don't make those noises. They do where I come from. Wait, what do you got over there? You look like a referee, Sienna. Hey, Sienna, holding, holding, personal foul, personal foul on Sienna. You guys have to give me a hard time every time I wear this black and white striped sweater. It looks like a referee shirt. You need to come in the penalty box with all the top of it. You need to get back to the movie theater. I don't know what you're talking about. So what was the big selling movie of the weekend? I don't know what you're talking about, dude. But I'm going down next week, and I'd love if you guys could contribute a little bit to the travel fund and the BP fund. It's not going to happen. You're rich. What are you talking about? Maybe you guys give back for once. Instead of take, take, take, maybe you give, give, give. That's Topper's motto. So that we can fund the wet t-shirt contest you're trying to put on down there? Mikey, answer me this. Do they need some laughs and some giggles down there? Yeah, but they need it from somebody that has their pants fully on, Dwayne. Why?

1:48:47Well, because I'm the man to do it, dude. I got 10 of my dimes. I'm taking them down. What is a dime? What does that even mean? They're all 10. That's the creepiest. Not one of them over 18 either. Okay, you're a pervert. Speaking of the Gulf Coast oil spill. What is the latest that we have going on with this thing, Sienna? Oh, well, the cap that on the damaged Gulf of Mexico well is containing more of the oil gushing out after BP managed to place it over the well last Thursday. So on Saturday.

1:49:37It funneled about 441,000 gallons to the tanker on the surface, which is up from 250,000 gallons on Friday. So it's getting better. But it's not clear how much oil is still escaping from the well. So some oil will continue to gush out until the relief well is completed in August. They got to wash birds with like dish soap. Oh, yeah. In Texas, these oil birds are showing up now. I mean, it's all over the place. Reached Florida. Senator Ben Nelson said that they need troops. They need actual troops down there from the U.S. government so that they can, like, wash birds, wash stuff, get pickup oil. The National Guard is a mess. Yeah, it's so sad. That's what they're asking for. And here's what President Obama had to say. What I've said to Fat Allen, who's the national incident coordinator. He said Fat Allen. Fat Allen. Hey, hey, hey. We need more troops. It's Fat Allen. It's Obama. I bet Obama asked. Do I really call him Fat Allen? Isn't Fat with a PH? It's PH Fat. No, President Obama. It's Fat. Fat. As in Thaddeus. Thaddeus. Thad. I think it's Fat Allen. I think it's Fat Allen. I'm going to call him Fat Allen. Don't, Mr. President. Please don't. Play it again. It's going to be really awkward. Who's the National Incident Coordinator and is somebody, what I've said to Fat Allen, the National Incident Coordinator.

1:51:01What if you're Alan and you're like, why don't you just go be fat? He's like, my name is Thad. He goes, easy chums. Really? We're in second grade again, Obama. Oh, look at that. Look at that. Sienna's picking a little Bobby Brown. I really love you, girl. Todd said this is underrated. Yahoo just said that if you can just master this one habit... You're going to be all good with your girl. All good with her. Just this one thing. I'll tell you what it is. Want to do some Woods of Wisdom? You know that. We've got Woods of Wisdom coming up, too. Next. You're listening to The Mikey Show. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. This is the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar. The XX play at the House of Blues tomorrow night and also tomorrow night, the Delta Spirit are at the Belly Up.

1:52:01Cage the Elephant is at the House of Blues on Wednesday. The Whigs play the Belly Up on the 17th. Switchfoot is at the Fair on the 24th. And the Kings of Leon are at Cricket Wireless on July 9th. The Black Keys are at Soma on September 25th. And Alice in Chains and the Deftones are Viejas Arena on October 15th. The FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar can be heard four times daily. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar at fm949sd.com. On an all-new Fox Monday, there's no lie too big. I smell the cover-up. There's no crime too small. We're literally going after a candy burglar. It's the premieres of Lie to Me and the Good Guys. First... Dr. Cal Lightman is back as the world's foremost expert in deception detection. How can you tell when I stop lying? You shut your mouth. But when he faces a student with a dark secret. You killed that missing girl. Finding the truth could be deadly. You're gonna lose this game. It's the summer premiere of...

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1:57:10This report is brought to you by Las Vegas Convention and Visitors Authority. Fremont Street Experience in downtown Las Vegas presents Summer of the 70s Music Festival with free nightly concerts throughout the summer. Go to VegasExperience.com for a complete lineup of concerts. Heading on that 15 southbound this morning at the 5, we've got a car that's stuck. The hood is up. They are still sitting in the number 3 lane on the 5 northbound after the 905. Bunch of plastic that's across the number 2 lane. Car swerving to avoid it. And watch out for this guy out for his morning walk this morning. A couple people, actually, on the 94 eastbound before Broadway. They're over on that right shoulder. This report is also brought to you by McDonald's. It's back now. Quench your thirst for less at McDonald's for a limited time. Choose from a variety of 42-ounce, icy cold soft drinks, only 79 cents. That's a lot of refreshment for very little change. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBC TCA, Lincoln Financial Media Station, the new home. of the Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Regulators. You regulate any stealing of his property. We're damn good too. But you can't be any geek off the street. Gotta be handy with the steal if you know what I mean. Earn you keep. Regulators! Mount up! It was a clear black night. A clear white moon warren. He was on the streets trying to consume some skirts for the E.

1:58:39So I could get some phones rolling in my ride, chilling all along. Just hit the east side of the LBC. On a mission trying to find Mr. Warren G. Seen a car full of girls, ain't no need to tweak. All you search know what's up with 213. So I hooked so left on 21 and Lewis. Some brothers shooting dice. So I said, let's do this. I jumped out the rock and said, what's up, Warren G? Come on, Hoyle. I wanted to try to guess. Come on, Hoyle. It is not who I thought. That is, yeah, Warren G. Regulate. He sounded tough, Mike. Yeah. Regulate. Very gangsta. You are. Let's see. Okay. So what did Yahoo say? So if you're listening, fellas, you want to get in good with your lady. If you can master this one thing. We're girls with their men. Okay. You can master this one thing. You're in like Flint. Mute button. Mute button. I know what it is. What? Back rubs. No. It's a response to something. From the woman? Or for a man. If you can accept an apology. No. If you can give an apology. Accept a compliment. No. Give a compliment. No. Well, I mean, kind of like give a compliment.

2:00:08Okay, let me give you a couple. Now, there's not like one go-to word here, but it's basically favorable feedback. So if one of you guys goes home, Mike, you got a great compliment from Garrett today. Garrett. And it really, you're stoked. And you've been working really hard to do this one thing that Garrett's been asking you to do. And you came home and you told Rebecca, you know, Garrett pulled me aside. He told me, you know, that I did that really great. And if Rebecca's like, oh, cool, you know. Right. And you're like. Oh, man. But if she's like, oh, my gosh, you've been working so hard on that. Like, I'm so proud of you. I'm so glad. You know, like, if you respond really well to something that they've been working on. That feels good, right? It feels so good. Like, acknowledgments. Exactly. And, I mean. There's the obvious ones like getting a new job and stuff. But just something that they know you've been working on or like a big event is coming up and you've been really nervous about it and just always asking, how did it go? And just be so interested in what matters to them. It's dead on. That is dead on. And boost their, you know, help boost them. I mean, maybe it didn't go well. You'd just be like, well, I know you worked really hard and, you know, it's okay. When you're Sig Other. Sig Other. Sig Other. Sig Other. When they give you.

2:01:17The proud thing? When they're proud of you? Man. That feels so good. Feels real good. Especially because that's the first person you usually want to call. And in your mind, you're like, oh my gosh, I'm so excited. They're going to be so excited. So if you tell them and they're like, oh yeah, cool. Anyway, so all of a sudden you're like, wah, wah, wah. Plus, your expectation usually is that they're going to flip for you. Yeah. You inflate what your expectations are. Mrs. Woods at home is freaking great. at the proud bit, which I love. So proud of you. Like, it just slays me. But guys have a little bit of a harder time at that because sometimes you guys forget when we have, like, something big going on. Yeah, gosh. You know? So one of the biggest things... I'm going to work on it. One of the biggest things for you guys to work on is remembering and you being the one to bring it up before she does. Can I tell you... That means so much to us. And I hope my wife's listening. There was something... This has... Bugged me for, and maybe her too. I didn't make a big enough deal out of when she was running. My wife ran. Running for what? She was running. She was a runner. She was running. Running. He was trying to catch her. And she ran in a little like 5K or something. And I went, but I don't, I just, as I look back on it, I'm like, you could have made a bigger deal out of that. And I didn't.

2:02:45I didn't make a big enough deal because you know why? Selfish. Yeah. I was into my own thing. I think that's probably a lot of our deal. I just was too caught up in my own little world. Weird. I didn't make a big enough deal, I think, about what my wife had to go through to get us here. Yeah. And what she had to do. I'm going surfing, hanging out with Jay. It's insane. Hanging out with you guys. She's. Freaking packing, moving, setting everything up, getting us out here. I mean, I know I didn't make a big enough deal about it. We need to. God, I'm a jerk. Man, I was a jerk all weekend to my wife. That's what Jay said this morning. Let's listen to these guys. I don't know what was wrong with me, but she was such an angel. She put up with me. I just was like, why do you love me? You had your man period. Oh, my gosh. I'm loving this. You had his myriad. You had your myriad. It was horrible. Ew. Your manstrel cycle. You guys are. Nothing? I get nothing for that? I like it. Nothing? I've heard it before. Have you? Yes. I thought I just invented that. No. Menstruate. Yeah. Really? Damn it. Hack. I'm a hack. I love you. What were you going to say? I was going to say, you guys, none of you guys have told your wives this, but you're all saying it right now on the air. Yeah, you know why? Because we're cowardly lions.

2:03:54Maybe you go home. I mean, maybe one of them is trying to lose weight. Come home today and be like, how's everything going? You look so good. What are you implying, Sienna? You know what? I don't know. Well, he said running, so it made me think of trying to lose weight. She's right. If we do that a little bit more, you too, ladies. These two brats over here aren't even doing their stuff. No. Oh, no. What's it like over there in Perfectville? We're not perfect. You're talking to the single brat on the show. No, yeah, if you both do it, it's good. Chick does it, guy does it. It doesn't matter. It's good, right? Yeah, very, very good. Just be so supportive. How about this? Watch this. Our boy Woods. I'm going to try to make sense of it for you. Doozies. I love doozies. Dude, this first one. This first one. It looks like a novel. Dude, and you know what? I purposefully left it. As is. Really? Didn't mess with it. Holy cow. I know. Are you going to read that whole thing on the air? That's the thing. I was like, you know me. Yeah, we know you. Brevity, brevity, brevity. Right. But as I took a look at it, I was like, I think this whole thing is pretty worthy of reading. Let's do it. Woods dated a guy last February, stopped, dated again in May. Well, not really dating, but dating. What does that mean? Slang. Yeah. Last May, he manned up.

2:05:25And cut me loose because he knew he could not commit and didn't want a relationship. As you guys listen to this, this is what I do when I read these. Words are really important to me. So I pay attention to everything that's being said. Too often I think that we just hear people and we go, and they'll say something crazy and we'll just let it go by. Because they'll let it go by. They'll go, yeah, and so, you know, and then, you know, he spit on me and I was like, whatever. And so the next day we were like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Go back to that spit on me thing. What do you mean? You were like, whatever. Anyway. I just want you to think that as you're listening. So she says, last May he manned up, cut me loose because he knew he could not commit and didn't want a relationship. I was devastated and deeply in love with him. From May till February of this year, we occasionally texted. In February of this year, he said to never contact him again. Oh boy. A bit mean and sudden. But I got the message loud and clear, so I did just that. I left him alone. Then. On the exact one year anniversary of the last time I was with him. Now, I don't know what she means by that. Yes, you do. Does she? Is that what she means? Last time they hooked up. She knows the one year anniversary of the last time that they had sex? Maybe it was like on her birthday or something. I don't know. All right. Valentine's Day. Something like that. She says on the one year anniversary of the last time I was with him, he sent me a text using a word of endearment that got my attention and convinced me to consider getting together with him again. No.

2:06:50Then he canceled and hasn't responded or contacted me again since. Here's the problem. I was and am clearly in love with this guy. I had finally gotten to the point where I could leave him alone, and did for nearly three months. He picked the one day and the one word that he knew would manipulate my heart, and now he is not responding at all. I do not plan to contact him again, but I just don't understand why men... are so surprised by the emotional response from a woman when they behave this way. I know men want to label it as crazy or drama, but it isn't. If men were to behave with respect and open communication to a woman, even if they have to be mean, it would be far superior to being completely ignored. I listen every day and I have no doubt your insight is what I need. Signed, M1, Amazon Beauty. Woodsy. I'm wondering what her question is.

2:07:53I think I know. What is it? A couple of questions. But I think the overall question is, why are guys like this? I don't know. Why does she keep letting him in? That's the key. Seriously. He's right. It's true. He's right. My question is, listen, this guy, let's get it settled right away. He's a dirtbag. There's no doubt about it. We get that, right? I mean, he's not very cool. Okay, let's strike dirt back. He's not very cool. He's not a cool guy. She knows he's not a cool guy. How does she know he's not a cool guy? Because he slayed her and ran. Hello? He made it real clear early on he wasn't a cool guy. And she keeps going back, and she kind of points the finger at him like she's a victim. Like, well, but he chose the one word on the one day that he knew. And she's searching for that one word on that one day. It could have been any word on that day or any other day for that matter. Yeah. She was deeply in love with him. He knows how much I like hey. Here's the thing. Guys as a whole, as a whole, this is a broad generalization, but pretty accurate. Guys are egomaniacs. And his bit with sending that text on that day was, let's just see. Let's see what can happen. This guy, if I'm Amazon woman.

2:09:14That sounded weird. But if I'm an Amazon woman, dude, I got to delete the number. Maybe maybe even change my number and let this clown rot. Just let him rot. And, you know, hey, I doubt he's going to come to you with genuine sincerity and an apology. But I just move on. Earlier we were saying that with a with a guy and with the women, too. If you're trying to lose weight, you look at somebody that's in really great shape and you go up to him, you go, what do you do? In situations like this, I'm just going to throw it out there. Imagine the strongest dude that you know emotionally, like some dude that's just nails, right? If you're a chick, imagine the strongest chick that you know, a chick that when you think of her, she don't take any, you know what? And she is nails. And then when dude texts you, Ask yourself, I wonder what my friend that's nails would do right now. Yeah, for sure. Because your friend that's nails isn't going to be like, let me come over. Let's do it. Yeah. She's not going to do that. She's going to tell the guy to kick rocks. Yeah. Your friend that's nails would have deleted his number a long time ago. Oh, and moved on. Yes. For sure. Yes. For sure. This guy, you know, again, it's not an indictment of him. It's pretty much all guys. I mean, we're all egomaniacs. You always kind of want to know if you still got it. And that's what this guy's looking for. I'll tell you what.

2:10:39Girls do it too, girls and guys. I've had my heart broken and I've been a heartbreaker before. It's like we have a sixth sense when we know that person is starting to pull away. And you're like, I wonder what so-and-so's up to. And just like, you know, just disrupt the waters a little bit. Bring them back. Yeah, exactly. It's a game. It's horrible. It's kid games. It feels really good to know that somebody's into you. Yeah, and still keep them strung along, you know. And you do it, right? when you're pretty sure they're almost over you. I haven't heard from them in a while. And they're not over me. I see Facebook pictures. Looks like there was a guy in the picture with her. Let me send her a text. It's sadistic. It's sadistic. I mean, it's a sadistic move. This girl had a rough time getting over you. Let her be. Unless you want her. Unless you want her and you're going to prove to her that you're different and you've changed. It's like, I don't want her, but I don't not want her. Right. It's the oldest thing in the book, man. With or without you. It's worse, too, because... She's so 100% aware of it when she says that he finally manned up and cut her loose. That says, oh, I know. Like he had the sympathy. He was never going to date me. He knew that. He's not into me. She keeps thinking, in my opinion.

2:11:59She keeps thinking that he's going to change and this time it's going to be different. He's going to grow up or he's going to finally see the light or something like that. And ladies, how many times have you heard from this very guy? How many times have you heard from him when he's had a couple to drink and he's like, I'm so glad we're finally having this conversation. Because I love you. I just want you to know I love you. I know I've been in it. I have been. I have. been that dude with my wife when we were dating and we were on and off just she started dating this guy named craig i always call him craig because his name's craig but it's spelled like craig so i'm like how's your boyfriend craig and uh so i would i would text her right when she was kind of getting settled, and I'd be like, eh, maybe not. Maybe come back to the kid for a minute. I did that bit for years. Years. You're awful. I know. That's awful. I married her. I just think this poor girl, I mean, I feel bad for her. She just doesn't get it. It's like, just know that you can only control one person in life, and that person is you. So try to get your own control on the situation, and just get away from this guy. Delete. Delete him. Delete him. I did that, too. Craig.

2:13:16I didn't do that bit, but Rebecca, when we were on a break, it was a very long break. How long? Three months. No longer. It was probably four months. And she met a guy that was from Spain. I guarantee you, Mike, he was like... How are things going with him? From her Mexican ex-boyfriend. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. How's the Spaniard? Can't speak a word in Spanish. How's the Spaniard, Rebecca? How did you guys know about the other guys? Oh, she told me. Because they told you it would get you jealous. Yeah, it would make me pissed. You've done it. Nowadays, you have things like Facebook. Make me drink more. You guys have done it. Oh, Jamie, we did this bit. She went out with Craig one night, and he had to go do something in the morning. I don't know what he was doing. Probably a douchebag festival. But she's like, were you? Give me a ride to my car because Craig and I were out at the concert last night and I left it and I'm like, really? Yeah, I'll give you a friggin' ride to your car. So it's just a deed, a whole drive. Poor Craig. Craig was just a pawn. Craig is a clown. In the Woodsies game. I know. Craig was probably a clown. Well, here's the thing, too. The better man won. You know what, though? Craig really never had a chance. Craig never had a chance. Craig was a rebound. Yeah, he was a rebound. Yeah, Craig didn't have a chance. Listen to this before we get on the next one.

2:14:40Mikey Show. First off, the guy's a player. Secondly, she is not the victim as much as a timeless romantic. Sienna just put her hand over her mouth as if to say, or naive slash young. That's why you don't buy the cow if you get the milk for free, right? What does that mean? You know. No, no, no, no. I know what it means, but in context, I was like, how does it have to do with this, though? Because she was slaying him on the rag. She keeps letting him back in. And as far as the text, a drunk booty call slash late night rendezvous perhaps? With time comes experience. Sadly, too, with time comes gamesmanship. And eventually the understanding that in the beginning it's a game. M1 spam and eggs. Listen, she's not a victim. She's no victim. I get that you're, yeah, maybe she's young. She's bummed out. She's bummed out because this guy. She put herself in that situation. You got, once you said it.

2:15:41You know, and I've been the same. I've been the guy that didn't care enough about a girl, but was too selfish and knew she liked me. And that felt too good than to just let her go and find somebody that would actually treat her well. Well, she was a victim in the sense that she was treated badly, but she made herself the victim the second time. What is it? What is a shame on? Oh, easy, GW. Fool me once, you can't fool me. You can't fool me again. Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me once, I don't know me. Second me twice. Fool's river of gold. Fool me once, you can't fool me again. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Won't get fooled again. Here's another one. This one comes from a good friend of ours on Facebook, M1 Swan. Hi, Swanee. She says, Woods, my husband's a chronic restaurant, complainer, and critic. Oh, boy. If we're somewhere like a fast food place and they start sweeping near us, he will literally ask them to stop and tell them that it's rude to kick up dust while he's eating. That is rude. Oh, God. And he will make comments to me about bad service at most places. Most of the time he's right, but I get so embarrassed when he says something. I get so embarrassed when he says something to him. I tell them that they're going to spit in our food if he doesn't shut up. Am I wrong or is he? He's one.

2:17:001,000% wrong. Is he? Yes. I would not like if there was dust all up in my food. Really? Is it like a windstorm of dust when you're eating? Come on, dude. The guy's being dramatic. And he's, I hate to say it, he's one of those guys at the restaurant that he's a little bit better than them, he thinks. And he thinks that because they are serving him, he can kind of do what he wants and push them around. Here's what my thought. A chronic complainer at a restaurant? My thought is, hey, dude, if it's that bad, what are you still doing? You know, like, hey, try the drive-thru. So he can complain. So he can complain. We all have those things that we're addicted to doing. He's addicted to complaining. Some of us are, we, even though we complain about it, we wouldn't feel normal without it. Yeah, that's why I cruise the boards looking for people running mouth. Because I complain about them, but I still want to see them. Glutton for drama. 100%. Glutton for punishment. You guys ever, you could easily avoid a dramatic situation. You could easily do it. But you're like, I'm going to let this play out. I welcome it. Just to show how bad it is. What a badass I am. Yeah, and how bad this situation is. I don't know if I do that. I do. I don't think I do. I avoid confrontation. I do not. I do not like it. I welcome it real good. Hey, but Swanee, I'm sorry.

2:18:24I would refuse to go out to dinner with him. Seriously. Because that, to me... It doesn't matter. I'd be like, fine, I'm going to cook or you're going to cook and we're not going to dinner because I don't want to be embarrassed by you yelling at the waitress because you've got onions on your steak. That's one of his little things about him, though. You have to just kind of accept it. You don't. That's very rude. We have one more, but this call looks so good. Did you see? Oh, yeah. We'll save it. Who dat? M1 Ben? Yep. How you doing, dude? Good, man. How you doing? Good. Tell everybody what you're calling about. Kind of freaked out. My wife is getting ready to go on a trip to Vegas for girls only weekend. And she's getting way too excited about it. She can't quit talking about it. And I guess the thing that's really, really freaking me out is she went out last weekend and she bought new clothes, got a new hairstyle, color, went to the spa and did the whole whole wax job thing. What's the problem? I think it's weird that she's kind of going all out for her girl's trip, and she's never, ever been this fired up when we're going on a trip. And, like, she has never, ever acted like this before, if you know what I mean. I know exactly what you mean. I feel a little insecure. Yeah, it's called Slayfest 2010. No, it's not. Prepare yourself. Really? Yeah, 100%. It is not. Slayfest 2010. No, it's not. Who's insecure, Sienna, him or her? He is. He's insecure. Yeah.

2:19:48Why are you getting your tops and bottoms done if, you know... Yeah, when you get your bottoms done, you're heading up to Vegas. I buy the tops and tails. Oh, gosh. Now, she's never gotten the down below done before? Never, no. Whoa! Where'd you guys go on your honeymoon? We actually went to Hawaii. And she didn't get a top down? No. Well, because she already had... And she just wants to go. It's an all-out girls weekend. You want to pamper yourself. You're like, I haven't done anything for myself in a while. I'm going to see my old friends. They're probably all looking good and this and that and the other thing. Wouldn't you be embarrassed if you went and laid out at the pool with your girlfriends and they're all done up and you look like you, you know. Well, how drastic can it be? You're the one wearing sweatpants and skirted, a bathing suit with a skirt on it. You don't need to wax to look fine. You'll be okay. Exactly. There's other things you can do. What is she going to wear? A pair of, you know, Adidas shorts? No. It's easier, though. Have you heard of her razor? It's easier. Oh, but the basic thing, you get the bumps and, you know, it's easier. Girls, I can't explain it, but girls want to look good when they're around their girls. Yeah. So they can get slayed. You don't want to be the slumpy one. You don't want to be the weakling. So they can get slayed in Vegas.

2:21:00No, you just want to look good and you want to feel good. We would have let you in except for who's the hag in the back of the pack with you? I swear, there's nothing better than if you see one of your old friends you haven't seen in a while and they're like, oh my gosh, you look great because you know they're sincere about it. Devil's advocate. Go ahead, Woods. Go ahead. Todd. Yeah? Going on a boy's trip. Oh, kill him. Hold on. I didn't even get it out. You better put those clippers away, buddy. Those aren't coming out until you get back. But guys wouldn't care. Hold on. Todd goes to the salon. He gets a fresh new perm. Okay. He gets, he goes, and you walk in the bathroom, and he's got the clippers. And he is cleaning house. And you're like, huh. You're about to go to L.A. with your friends. What are you doing? Here's the difference. Guys don't wear little things that are pushed up on their junk. No. If he's wearing a Speedo. I wear a Speedo. I don't think Todd's going to be wearing a Speedo. That's what I wear. I have to clean house before I go anywhere. And your boys won't be like, dude, you look good. Have you been working out? Why are your girlfriends seeing that? What are you guys doing? Because we're just girls. We're at the beach. We're at the pool. No, they're in Vegas. Yeah, they're at the pool. We'll be like...

2:22:13Look at you, you skinny little biatch. Yeah. Well, if they're laying at the pool together. What are they doing? If they're laying at the pool together, aren't they kind of all, you know, you don't want to be embarrassed, man. Should this guy be worried? No, he shouldn't. Hey, Ben, I don't necessarily think that you need to be worried. I mean, why not ask? How about that? That's what I always say. I always come back to that. I'm always like, how come we're so afraid to just say to our significant other, our SIG other, how come we just don't go? Sienna wouldn't be afraid. Jamie would not be afraid. What do you think you're doing, Todd? If I walked in with the Clippers, I'd be like, those are going back. You can bring them out after your home, my friend. What in the world? 100%. I think I saw a hair by the toilet that we really need to talk about. I've run it through forensics, and it is yours. I'm going to do a check before he walks out the door. Yeah, for sure. You're not going anymore, my friend. Lauren's Magnum P.I. She'd be like, excuse me. I saw you in the bathroom. I heard the buzzing noise. What's going on in there? It's hilarious, though. When the shoe's on the other foot, the girls are like, oh, no, no. That's no big deal. We just like to look good. Okay, but because guys aren't like that. Aren't we? Mikey is. I am, too.

2:23:26My only explanation, really, in defense is that the girls are exposed in their bikinis, and that's why they would have that done. It does make a difference. Itsy-bitsy, teeny-weeny. Guys are wearing these huge shorts and just the... I mean, maybe... I am not wearing huge shorts. I wear a Speedo, and that's why I have to Brazilian wax. Why don't y'all grow up? We're all adults. We're not children. Does Mama know you get resilience? No, she doesn't. She does now. That's a sin, Hoyle. Mama doesn't listen, and you don't know what it is, all right? I do it because I want to look good while I'm walking out there at the Blagio. What? Why do you wear a Speedo? Like, what's the point? Why do I wear a Speedo? Yeah. Because it's sexier than I'll get it. So, you get more girls because of the Speedo, you think? Hasn't failed me one time. Where are all these girls? What color? What color Speedo? Red. You know that. Ferrari red. Does it say? Easy does it. You know what it says on the inside? What? Easy does it.

2:24:29Good luck with that, Ben. Thanks, guys. Thanks. We get a ton of phone calls saying it's singles weekend in Vegas this weekend. Oh, yeah. Weird. Is it really? Isn't every weekend singles weekend in Vegas? Yeah. All right, Ben. Maybe hire a PI. Make yourself feel better. My wife is actually for hire, so is LOB. They'll make it right for you. When we come back, let's do that last words of wisdom because it's pretty good. They're all solid, solid. So we'll do that when we come back. This is Switchfoot always. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More coming up on FM 94.9. Long day, honey? Uh-huh. I desperately need a trip to Blissville. Let's go. I'm totally craving a frappe at Mickey D's. A frappe what? Frappe. You're not making any sense. A frappe, as in McCafe frappe? What are you talking about? McDonald's takes a little coffee magic ice.

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2:30:089,600. On the 15 southbound before old 395 highway on the north end, we do have a solo spin out. He's in the center divider going the wrong way. On the 5 southbound before Lucadia Boulevard, we had an incident here, a bunch of pieces of metal that were in the number four lane. CHP did run a traffic break and they cleared that. And the 15 southbound at the 5, another incident cleared. That was that guy who was sitting around with his hood up in the number three lane. This report is brought to you by StandForLess.com. The average family of four consumes more. in 2,000 beverage containers a year. Let's see how many we could keep out of the landfills by recycling. Learn how at StandForLess.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Back to the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Catchy though. Gotta give her that. That's Britney's favorite song of hers. She said that too, right? She wrote it real good. I wonder. Did she? I'm telling you, that's a good house cleaning song. I bet. It's got a little workout jam. Lauren knows all that stuff, man. Yes, she does. Running around in her little thong. That's not what I do. Doesn't it? What do you wear, boxers and a Ricky Rudd t-shirt? What are you doing? Ricky Rudd! What are you up to? I'm not going to clean in a thong. Would that be scandalous? Is that what you're saying? They're little boy shorts. They're little boy shorts. Little boy shorts.

2:32:08Under is. Yeah. All right, here's the last Woods of Wisdom. Woods, I have neighbors that have some pretty loud lovemaking sessions. Oh, boy. Lovemaking. I only know this man's name because I've had to endure his wife mentioning it at the top of her lungs. Oh, my gosh. Just trying to get some sleep. Should I say something to them? Call the cops, the rental office, and one time card. Must be my neighbor. Woods. I don't know. Dude, I mean, you guys know my story. When I had the two little fancy boys that lived next to me, and they were really loud. I would beat on the wall. I would go crazy. I called the cops on them. Yeah, but it's a lot more awkward when it's lovemaking. Yeah, when it's lovemaking. To interrupt them, you're like, stop. Had the fancy boys been doing lovemaking, I would have slept in my car, 100%. Moved to Nevada. I would have moved to Portland with Edward Cullen. So, dude. I got to do the wall beat. That's like my only... I would have to do the wall beat. Embarrass him? Yeah, embarrass him. Like, yo, I'm over here. I can hear what you're doing. I think that I... What do you do? Well, listen. I know exactly what I would do. My answer may not be correct. This may not be the right thing. I'm just going to tell you what I would do. But it may not be the right thing. Honest cap? What you would do? Honest cap. Honest cap. Okay, so you hear... Like, super honest cap, because a lot of people are going to be like, you wimp. Email.

2:33:32No. Leave a note on the door. No. I would ask the rental office, like, what do you do in this situation? Yeah, that's not bad. That's not bad. The neighbors are, you know, kind of loud with the lovemaking and it's kind of... What if they own it? Disturbing. Like a condo. No, I think it's an apartment. He said something about a rental office. If there's a rental office, then yeah, that's kind of like going to HR. And it's on them, you know? It's on them. It's on the rental office. I do the bang, too. I get the ball bang, like, yo, I'm over here. I couldn't do that. No way. Because I kind of want them to come over and run mountains. Really? Because then when you see them in the hallways, it's like, oh, hey, yeah, sorry. You know what? Actually, I'm over. It's not a big, yeah, just next time. I'd rather get along, you know? See, yeah, I would not want awkwardness walking around, but I also would feel weird getting the rental office involved because it's like, now they know about it and they've never even heard it. It's kind of embarrassing, so I would just. Do a note, an anonymous note, and just say, look, we all hear you. Oh, gosh. You know, I thought you should know. The anonymous note is rough. I think I'd move before I did that. The anonymous note? Or get, like, a noise-making machine. Just put some white noise on. Bark Maumon one time was at a hotel in Reno with a lady friend and had a note on the door the next morning. Really? Sure did. Well, don't you kind of expect that at a hotel? I know I do. Yeah, it's a hotel. Yeah.

2:34:55I had a friend sleeping over at our house one time and he's like, man, what was all that noise last night? And I said, man, I was trying to open this window and it would not open. He's like, wow, that's crazy. All the strange responses. Trying to open a window. Trying to open a window. That window's name is Kim. That window was stuck. Oh, Woods. It took like 15, 20 minutes of effort. So Kim was helping open the window? Yeah, Kim was helping. She was. 15, 20 minutes. Three to five minutes. Sienna put something. I love this. So Sienna put this in her recap. She said that Jenna, who is Sienna's daughter. Stepdaughter. Nine-year-old. Nine years old. Yeah. She had a pretty fun question. Parents, how do you answer this one? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And forget a parent. I mean, let's say it's just you. It's your niece. It's your nephew. It's whatever. Jenna's nine. Their dog, Zipper, was doing something inappropriate with a stuffed animal. Now, we've all seen this. We've all seen this. Puppies, dogs, you know, we've seen that. Well, Jenna asked Sienna what the dog was doing and why. Okay. I froze. Zipper a female? Zipper a female? She's a female, but she didn't look like a female when she was having fun. Penny Bell does that, too. She gets after it. I love it. For a while. Oh, yeah.

2:36:24It's not kind of dog. Sometimes it's... How embarrassing is that when it's, you know, guests that come over and your dog is... The lipstick comes out. The red rocket. Thank goodness. Thank goodness Zipper's a girl. But there's this one stuffed animal that we got her and it's bigger than she is. She's a small little miniature wiener dog. And Jenna's like, I keep seeing Zipper do that. She always does it with that stuffed animal. What is she doing? What is... I've never seen her do that before. What is she doing? And why is she doing it with the dog's face? With the doll? The dog. It was a dog stuffed animal. Oh, okay. Holding a little pumpkin. Because I was like, what does that mean? And the dog zipper always does it on the face. She pumps the face. She's confused. She just likes the little thrusting on the stuffed animal's face. Unbelievable. Yeah. And so I froze and I was like...

2:37:22Todd's nowhere to be found. How do I handle this? What do you say as an adult? What do you say? She's just loving on him. That's what I'd say. She's just loving on him. Just loving on him. She's confused. You want to know what came out? What? Oh, no. The lipstick. No, of my mouth. It's a female. No, what came out of my mouth? Creeper. What? Jenna, that's just Zipper's way of showing the stuffed animal who's boss. That's not bad. Hey, Sienna, you're right. You are right. I was like... is that awful that I said that? Is that okay that I said that? Todd came home, I was like, it's true. She asked what it was, and I said that, and it was like, oh, no, it's great. No, that's, what a dynamite answer. Because it's true, it's dominant. She's showing the boss. Jenna kept saying, Jenna kept saying, see, stuffed animal, Zipper knows she's the boss, and like, she would, oh, my God. Wow. Zipper saying, who's the boss? Who's the boss? I know. Oh, man. Oh, my gosh. I was. It was. Yeah. Lots of those questions come up now because now she's in third grade and starting to figure things out. Yeah. Later on. Absolutely what it was. I wonder if she will ever come back to you.

2:38:31Oh, of course. You know, like years from now and go, what was that all about? But it's like, well, I can't, you know, I don't want to say that. And I don't want to overstep my boundary as like a stepmom too and like go into detail. Right. When the dogs are in, this is Cesar Malone, the dog whisperer. Oh, hi, Cesar. A lot of times when the dogs are together, they need to let each other know which is more the dog. And a lot of times they focus on the face because the face is where there is the brain. Zipper was focusing on the face all right. I can't wait until Jenna's at her friend's house and she's like, yeah, you show him who's boss. Yeah, yeah. Show that stuffed animal who's boss. Well, she said, I've seen her aunt has a little dog too. And she said, I've seen Willie do that before too. What is that? Showing him who's boss. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Dominance. Dominance. What if people could handle it that way? What do you mean? Oh, if we could show each other who's boss that way? If we were just allowed? Just walk up and... Walk up to anyone. I'm your boss. Just a joke in someone's face. That's right. Yeah, they have those. They're called creepy rapers. Get.

2:39:49Awkward. That was over the line. You just took it to another level. Weird. That's not weird. That's true. Some guy that puts junk in your face just gets creepy. All right. Okay. Bye, Mike. Okay. Well, let's just shut all our mics off and turn off the radio station. Why? What else we got on time today, Mike? Why are you doing this stop down on me? I'm really glad that your dog does it, too, because I was like, is it weird that she does it to a girl? Penny does it. She's a little angel, though. Jasper likes to wrestle with Bear. And Bear... Took it to the next level. Oh, boy. And Jasper's like, what is he doing? Oh, gosh. Oh, Jasper? He is. Now, in that case, he is showing dominance. Yeah, but I quickly had to flip it around because I can't. Jasper's got to be the boss, so. Right. Does Jasper, like, does he notice that what he's doing is weird? He didn't know what he was doing. He thought they were wrestling. He's like, look at Barry. He's trying to wrestle me. I'm like, nope, nope. That's different than that. And it's a boy dog, so you've got to pull him off real quick. A little bit different.

2:40:53What do you think about this? I saw this last week. It's back again. Don't know why. Oprah's not married. She's got the same boyfriend now for 54 years. Going on 54 years, I think. Stedman. I thought they broke up. They're back together. Yep. Yeah, they have been for 45 years. No, they are boyfriend and girlfriend. He was being interviewed on the street as he was walking. Weird. And they asked him about how the city of Chicago. feels about Oprah. I really don't think they appreciate her. Are you kidding me? No, I don't think they do. I don't think they understand the value of who she is as a human being and what she's done. They take her for granted. What? Really? Wow. A lot. I'm sorry to hear that. Well, I'm just saying from an insider's point of view, because a prophet has no honor in his own town. First of all, she's, you know.

2:41:50Brought a lot of national attention to Chicago. She reaches 20 million people there in 115 countries every single day. It's home for her, and it's just natural for people to kind of take it for granted until you leave. I don't get it. What would it look like if they appreciate it? I'll tell you what. What would it look like? You know who that's coming from. Her? That's coming from Okra, dude. Really? She's not going to come off that half-cocked and say that without hearing it at home. She walks in and is like, don't appreciate me. Wait, wait, wait. You know what I mean? It's not one of those deals you'd think where he's like... He's totally in love with this woman, and he's trying to be like, people just don't appreciate what a great woman I'm with. And I'll tell you what. I bet you about 50% of the people out there, they know who Oprah is. She's a mogul. But they don't necessarily even know it's filmed in Chicago. Oh, yeah, they do. It's not like she's bringing attention. No, I did the settle a bet thing. Not everybody knows. No, they're like, oh, it's filmed in Chicago. If you don't watch the show, you probably don't know. Yeah, I guess if you don't watch it, I wouldn't know. Even if you don't watch the show, you don't. You know who Oprah is. God, I thought everybody knew it was in Chicago. You lived in Chicago. Yeah. I didn't, and I knew it. She's huge, though. Literally. Wow. Really. I knew he was going to say literally. I knew he was going to say it. Listen, what does it look like if they do appreciate her, Stedman?

2:43:03Are they supposed to have chariots named after her roaming through town? No, I think that there's a lot of people that, you know, like Woods, that don't really like Oprah that much and they give her a hard time and you get a car and you get a car and kind of make fun of her. And I think in Oprah's mind, she really does think that she's doing a lot of good and she has done a lot of good. So what are they supposed to do? Change it from Lake Michigan to Lake Oprah? No, no. But I think in her mind, she's like, I don't understand why people, you know, criticize me and why they're all critics when I'm just trying to help. Yeah. So that's what he hears. She's getting criticism because she's going to be moving to L.A. and leaving Chicago. And I think the people of Chicago were like, oh, really? We're not good enough for you. It's too cold here. Yeah. So maybe she's like, they don't appreciate me. 570-1949 is our number. You can also text message us. 949mikey at gmail.com. Do we have, do you have movie, like movies that were big this weekend? Yeah. Do you have that? Yeah, what were the big box office hits this weekend? Well, the number one was Shrek Forever After. That's the fourth Shrek making $25 million. That's why they keep making them. Yeah, why not? Well, yeah, you have huge stars in it. Everyone goes to see it. It's the second weekend in a row. It's been number one. Get Him to the Greek was number two. And you wanted to see that, right, Woods? Jonah Hill, Russell Brand.

2:44:24And Killers with Katherine Heigl, $16 million. Prince of Persia, The Sands of Time, Jake Gyllenhaal, $13 million. And number five, Sex and the City 2 with $12 million. Dude, it's still in the top five, man. Yeah, it is. Let's do it, man. Do what? We go make it right, man. Go see our girls. Our girls are back in action. Our girls? I've got a wife. Dude. Who's your girl, Mel Dog? No, dude. You want to go see our girls? Don't touch me, you freak. Don't be like that. Don't touch that. She's touching my rock-hot abs. I know she is. Touching something else that's rock-hot. Don't do that. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Dude, I'm talking about our Sex and the City girls. Oh, dude. Yeah, I'm 100% in. Can't wait. I heard Aiden's back in the sequel. I know. I'm kind of excited about that. Tell me about it. Whoa, Frankie. Sorry to get so excited, man, but Aiden's awesome. He is. He's good. He's looking good, bro. Last season, they showed him. I ain't a betting man, dude, but I'm just saying she should probably ditch Big, take back Aiden, right? You know, dude, I think in all honesty, they probably should have called Big Pig. Percentage he cheats on Kerry. Million percent, dude. I totally agree with you. I got two words for you, bros.

2:45:46Cosmos. Sold. I'm all the way in on that, brother. I got two words for you, man. I don't drink Cosmos. Get. Words. It's two words. Come on, dude. That's the two words. Get. Words. I do want to go see the movie, but I don't, you know, I'm not going to make it right with you, friend. I'm probably going to take the why. No. Yeah. Don't. I have an idea. Okay. We get brunch on Sunday. Really? We fly to New York City. Really? You think you'll see this movie? How freaking cool would it be to see Sex and the City? In the city. Zero percent, dude. It'd be really cool, Woods. Thanks for thinking about it, bro. Why don't you think about it? I thought about it, dude. I'm not eating quiche with you and then hopping a plane to JFK. Well, go to LaGuardia. We don't have to go to JFK. You owe me one, man. I don't really care about sex in the city. I got a cousin from Brooklyn. He did craft services in the movie. I want to see his name up on the screen at the end of the movie. That's why you want to see it. That's the only reason I want to go. I'm out, dude. No.

2:46:48Be a freaking man. Be a man, have brunch, and go see Sex and the City. It's a show for research for the show, dude. Is it? Only reason I even know about it is because my ex-girlfriend left the DVDs in my apartment. Oh, yeah. I had to watch it. Convenient. Dude, I'm out. I'm taking the wife. Dude, there's going to be a bunch of single chicks there. I got my new tank top for our Gino, bro. Yes. It's a Gino, dude. Guys, night out. Guys, night out. Taking the wife. I'm taking the wife. I promised her. It has nothing to do with me because, I mean, I'm kind of into it. You are totally into it. Am I? You are. Why don't we just go? No, dude. I got to take Jamie. I got to take Jamie. Oh, my goodness. Why can't Frankie just go with you? Why can't I just go with you? We'll take Mel Dog, too. Yeah, you. Yeah. Why do you always look drunk? What do you mean? You always look drunk, man. I'm drunk on my Frankie boy. No, you're not. Yes, I am. Just big, long, freakish nails away from me. Oh, yeah. Squat your back. Get away from me. Come here. I'm a tickle, tickle, tickle. Don't tickle me. I'm a tickle, tickle. Don't tickle me. Don't tickle me. Don't do that. He loves it, it sounds like. I hate being tickled because it's so funny, but it freaks me out. You are a punk.

2:48:06of man. Don't! Frankie gets all uptight. I know. Jeez, relax. You're so uptight around Mel Dog. He makes me tense. I make you tense? Yes, you make me tense. Why? Because. Well, because I... Dude, I'm not flying to New York. Why? It's very tense. I get all flustered. I like... Well, then I'll take care of everything, man. I'll get our tickets. You fly Jamie there, too? Who's Jamie? It's my wife, clown. How many times has this one talked about Jamie? It's my wife. So I forgot. I have a short memory. I forgot. It's a mistake. You're so intense, Frankie. No kidding. You fly us there, then we'll go. Both of us. Fine, fine. She and I get our own room. I'm going to fly you and Jamie so that you and I can go. No, Jamie's coming with us. All right, yeah, sure, I'll do it. You can't take time off the show, Woods, because he's in the city with Frankie. I'll go on the weekend. I'm going on the weekend. Hey, why don't you keep your eyes on your own paper? Yeah, keep your eyes on paper. He can do whatever he wants to do as long as it's research. Yeah, on your eyes. That's right, show research. Listen, I'm going to go get a coach bag for Jamie today. Good, thank you. She needs a new one if she's going to go, and we'll make it right. Get her some Blonix, too. She loves those. What about me?

2:49:30I want a new bag. Fine, I'll get you a new bag. Why do you guys know all these designers? What, Manolo Blonics? Yeah. Oh, I only know because my girlfriends... Right. They used to wear them. You work at Nordstrom's, don't you? You have a shoe thing. Your girlfriend that wears an invisible suit? What do you know about my girlfriends? You wouldn't even know. I have a ton of girlfriends. Oh, yeah? I can't wait to meet them. What's one of their names? Sabrina. Teenage Witch? Sabrina, really? That's the name you pull? Frankie? Sabrina? Yeah, she was a teenage witch. That's so funny. Sabrina never heard that one before. What happened with you two? I made love to her too much. She said, it's all you ever think about. You're a pig. Really?

2:50:29She wasn't in on it. When's Sabrina's birthday? 14. 14. That's how old she was? Oh. Frankie. May 14th. That was her birthday. Yeah. 19, 19. I forget, man. You made love so much, I can't remember. Knocked it right out of you. 570-1949 is the number. Give us a call. Let's see. Did you hear? About the sea world, not our sea world. It's the one in Orlando. This was all... Sienna was so sad about this this morning. She kept doing that. Killer whale gave birth and then died because it... Who? Because a calf came out of there and killed it. Killed the killer whale. It didn't kill it. Didn't it? Both of the whales died. The baby was a stillborn. Why? Did it kill the mother? It didn't kill them. They said, you know who the father of this child was? Tilikum. Oh, no. Tilikum is the whale that killed the trainer. Is that supposed to mean something to me? Tilikum was the one that killed the trainer. Killed the trainer. Shut up! It was his whale wife. Her name is Taima. Guys had a rough year. Oh, dude, yeah. He's all over the media. He's a murdering... I know. He didn't cause this, did he? No.

2:51:59The people that work at SeaWorld say that we're very saddened by this loss, although we understand that complications with pregnancy can occur. I'm really choked up. Maybe this will turn him around. Could be the loss of his wife and murdering somebody else. It'll turn him around, turn his behavior around. Yeah, maybe. Isn't that so they both died? Yeah. No, the baby was stillborn. I know. It's so sad. And SeaWorld is just so bummed out. This is at SeaWorld in Orlando. Sad. And it's like you think at SeaWorld, it's just fun and happiness. What do they do, by the way? Can you imagine? They got a... What do you... Yeah, what do you bury? Do you... What do you do? They dice it up, I guess. No, I was... I think you might have to. You might have to. You know, let's see. That's what they do in the... You think? That's what they do in the Sopranos when they kill somebody. They dice them up. That's right. That SeaWorld is not the same as the Sopranos. It isn't? It isn't? I thought that's where they filmed Sopranos. Maybe they just open the gate and let the whales fall out. Yeah, maybe you... Maybe you go out to the desert. Yeah, dig a hole. Would they have, like, a burial? No. They're not going to dig that big a hole. Why not? Maybe dice them up. There should be, like, a memorial at SeaWorld. Maybe the whale puts on some shoes made of cement. Yeah. Dice them up real good. Do a bandsaw in there. Yeah, I don't know. Stop it, would. It'd be fine. I don't know where he is. I saw him last week. I don't know. He's over here? You're over here now? Hey, Tommy, you know what a guy? I haven't seen that guy. I haven't seen him. Me either. I don't know. Maybe ask next week.

2:53:28Poor SeaWorld. Oh, yeah. Oh. Talk it up. Oh, guess what I need? KWSS 94.5. Callaway, I want to be rich. You know. Every request we've had this afternoon has been for this one. Giving away $12,000. The $12,000 money dollar giveaway later today. It's KWSS 94.5. That's a musical post. Yeah. Musical post, not a vocal post. I was worried. I was like, does Mike know this song that well? Well, I knew that there was a... Yeah. I knew there was something coming up. Hey, remember the dude that went on the high-speed chase, came down into San Diego? He's a former NASCAR driver? Yep. He's back in the news because we got some information on that dude that we didn't know. Tell ya. It's all coming up. Sienna picking the music today. That's why we're doing some Cowboy. We'll be right back. Pop it in. And turn it on. Go now. Be a part of The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. This is The Mikey Show. More coming up on FM 94.9. On an all-new Fox Monday, there's no lie too big. I'll smell the cover-up. There's no crime too small. We're literally going after a candy burglar. It's the premieres of Lie to Me and The Good Guys. First.

2:55:01Dr. Cal Lightman is back as the world's foremost expert in deception detection. How can you tell when I stop lying? You shut your mouth. But when he faces a student with a dark secret. You killed that missing girl. Finding the truth could be deadly. You're going to lose this game. It's the summer premiere of... Lie to Me. Then, it's the new action comedy that rocks The Good Guys. You got a war-enforced storage unit, found a body, then came under fire from an unknown assailant. And then everything exploded. Critics raid crime and comedy do mix. Bringing up the big guns on that one. Big guns is all I carry. Bradley Whitford and Colin Hanks star in The Good Guys, premiering right after the summer premiere of Lie to Me. It all starts tonight at 8 p.m. on Fox 5 San Diego. We asked people on the street, when it comes to shopping for a car, how does Toyota make it easy for you? Tons of models to choose from. That's pretty easy. If you want something super economical, a small car, or you want a big SUV, they have it all. So that's pretty easy. A lot of options. With great leases, low APRs, and cash back, it's easier than ever to get into a new Toyota. To see all current offers available, just visit buyatoyota.com.

2:56:29where you can build and price your Toyota, locate a dealer, and download an e-brochure. You can even search for a certified used Toyota and apply for financing. It's all just a click away at buyatoyota.com. Mosquitoes transmit West Nile virus. Fight the bite. Cover up. Use insect repellent. Prevent mosquito breeding by draining standing water. And report green swimming pools. Call San Diego County Vector Control at 858-694-2888 or text PEST to 75309.

2:57:15Suffering from high interest rates on your credit cards? Barely able to make the minimum payments on your debts? Our team of lawyers here at the Bankruptcy Law Center can help. Call 1-800-718-9688 or go to our website at GetOutOfDebtSanDiego.com. You can file for bankruptcy and still keep your home and your cars. A bankruptcy can wipe out your second mortgage and bring you current if you're behind on your house payments. Most people think bankruptcy destroys your credit, but many individuals actually have better credit after they file. The banks just received a $1.5 trillion taxpayer bailout. Here at the Bankruptcy Law Center, our team of lawyers can show you how to get your own bailout, giving you a fresh start and making you debt-free. Call 1-800-718-9688 today. Don't live the rest of your life buried in debt. Call to see if you qualify. Call 1-800-718-9688 today. Or go to our website, getoutofdeutsandiego.com. That's 1-800-718-9688. This is a legal advertisement. For centuries, cold beer has remained hidden. Hidden behind refrigerated doors. Hidden within cardboard walls amongst bottles and cans. Cold beer has remained hidden for far too long. Not anymore. Introducing the new Coors Light cold activation window. Now you can see if your beer is cold before you buy it.

2:58:37Frost Brew Coors Light, the world's most refreshing beer. Coors Brewing Company, Golden, Colorado. With great beer comes great responsibility. Had enough driving for one day? There's always a Motel 6 nearby. Get a clean, comfortable room, lowest price of any national chain. Motel 6, they'll leave the light on for you. This report is brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners. San Diego Toyota dealerships have a 2495 lube oil and filter replacement for United States Armed Forces members and veterans, including immediate family. See your dealer for details. On the 8 eastbound before Taylor Street, there's a big bag. It's in the number four lane. Car swerving to avoid it. Be careful. Also, the 163 southbound before Park Boulevard. It's a hit and run here, but no injuries. And a problem on the 5 northbound. It's a solo sedan in the center divider. This report is also brought to you by Hone Porsche Carlsbad. If you've been thinking about owning a new Mercedes-Benz, stop by Hone Mercedes-Benz Carlsbad and drive home excellence today. Part of the Hone family of dealerships in Carlsbad. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego. The Lincoln Financial Media Station. The new home of the Mikey Show. FM 94.9. For us to agree on lunch.

3:00:29100%. It really is. L.O.B. doesn't like to pay for parking. I don't. I'm a cheapskate. And we just had a vote, four out of five, for a restaurant, and she said no. No, no, no. I did not say no. She will walk, though, blocks. She'll walk eight blocks to not pay 30 cents for parking. It's a pet peeve of mine. I'll give you the money. I'll pay for your parking. It's not about that. It's the principle. It is the principle. But I'll pay you for it. I'll pay for it for you. Fine, fine. Done. I get a whole thing of change in my car. I want it valeted. Nah. Hey, check out createyourdesignonline.com. That's our boy Jared's website. He did all the stickers for us, the billboards, does all that stuff. He's so, so good. He's got a starter package for you for $150. He'll design a logo for your business, give you business cards. There's really nobody better at what he does. I'm missing. So good. So the guy that was a NASCAR driver that got caught in a high-speed chase, what's up with that dude? Okay, his name is James Edward Neal, 56 years old. He's from San Clemente. This happened about a month ago. We told this story about this guy who got in a high-speed chase on the freeway, ended up at La Jolla Village Drive right on the 5. Right. And now he's gotten into some more trouble. In fact, last Monday, he was arrested with attempted rape. Oh. Let out of jail on Thursday. That's good.

3:01:56How did they do that? A few hours later, was booked on suspicion of possession of methamphetamine and narcotic paraphernalia. This guy's a train wreck. Train wreck. He was arrested three times in less than one month. Maybe keep him locked up. Yeah. I mean, even his attorney was like, yeah, maybe we don't take him out. We don't bail him out this time. His last bail for the attempted rape was $115,000. I mean, I don't know. This guy is just... Yeah, he sounds like a train wreck. Picture? Yeah, no, there's no pic. We've seen him. Yeah. A haiku is sort of like a poem. It is a poem. It is a poem. It's a type of poem. Type of poem. 5-7-5. It means five syllables in the first line, seven in the second, five in the third. That's how a haiku works. And now it's time for another Mikey Show Haiku. He makes fun of Mike for his terrible music. Yet loves third eye blind. Yeah, kid had to get himself. It's about woods. Had to roast myself real good. And now it's time for another Mikey show haiku. She may be single. You creepers need not apply. Or she will cut you. You guys better take that to heart out there. This one about L.O.B. Yep. How'd you know? And they won't take it to heart. No, they won't. All kinds of bits. New bits.

3:03:32New ways. There's new ways. Can't teach an old dog me tricks or something like that. Whatever that means. Takes more than two to tango. When in Rome. This is a breakdown of how we Americans laugh online. Laugh online? Yep. What do you mean by that? I mean LOL. That's not laugh online. That's laugh out loud. No, it's laugh online. He means LOL is online. LOL, H-A-H-A. How do you let people know online that you're laughing? Now, Woodsy and Lauren are ha ha ha. Three ha's. I am two now. That's it? Just three? Three ha's if it's funny. Oh, I wish you wouldn't tell me that. Ha ha's the obligatory. Oh, you made a joke. Good for you. Ha is... I wish you wouldn't tell me that because now I know when she doesn't think my stuff is funny, she gives me just ha-ha. No, that's not true. I know her crafty ways. Okay, ha-ha in the beginning is like, oh, yeah. I acknowledge. I acknowledge. So there's LOL, there's ha-ha, there's, how about this one? The B-W-H-A-H-A-H. Oh, the boaha. I give it a boaha sometimes. I hate the boaha. Really? Yeah, I'm not a fan. Oh, I like it.

3:04:51L-M-A-O. G-I-T. Laughing my A off. G-I-T to that. What about H-E-H? That's an insult. Is R-O-F-L on there? It is not, but I know that one. Rolling on the floor laughing. Rolling on the floor laughing. It didn't even show up in the percentage. I'll break down the percentage here in just a second. And then finally, this one I've never heard before in my life. L-U-L-Z. L-U-L-Z. Laughing. Until. Until. I don't know. Lasers. Zoom. Zoom. I don't know. If I had a dime for every time I say that. You'd have one dime. I would have a nickel. Want to know what the most popular one is? Uh-huh. It isn't. LOL. It isn't LOL. It is not. LMFAO. Oh, sorry. Nope. It's the one that you guys do. 36% of people in America, that's what they do. No way. There's a lot of people that still don't even know the LOL. There's people that won't admit to the LOL. I don't try not to do LOLs. I think I've done one. I don't know if I ever have. I hate it. LOL comes in second place with 25%. So 25% of people do that. Third place.

3:06:10He, he, he, he. Oh, slays me. And a guy should never write he, he, he, he. I've done the he, he's for sure. You're a girl. Nothing wrong with the he, he, he. And none of your girl. You know what the wife and I do? Really? You mean guys that you like? Is that what you mean? I mean anyone. If a guy wrote you he, he, he, he. I prefer he, he, he to LOL any day of the week. Really? Mm-hmm. You know what the wife and I do? Why? Because Jamie doesn't laugh. She cackles. So instead of LOL, she writes C-O-L. Oh, yeah. I found that out this weekend. Cackle out loud. Cackle out loud. Yeah, because she goes, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. She knows. She's a cackler. And then L-U-L-Z, which somebody's got to call us and tell us what that is. L-U-L-Z. Lulz? Lulz. Mm-hmm. That and heh. 8% of Americans. I hate heh. I like to know what I'm seeing on the Mikey Show fam is J-A-J-A. That's Spanish. Ha, ha. Yeah, Spanish ha, ha. Yeah, Spanish ha, ha. Yeah. And then blah, ha, ha, ha, ha, and LMAO are both 6% of Americans doing that. Oh, jeez. The blah, ha, ha reminds me of, like, Dr. Evil laugh. Really? Yeah, blah, ha, ha, ha. See, I just picture Mimi like, blah, ha, ha, ha, ha. Wow. Yeah, it gets pretty tricky because depending on how many ha, ha's are written, how funny it is. So stupid. And really judged by your ha, ha's. Oh, jeez. How many ha, ha's do I get?

3:07:38Is that a capital LOL? Because if it's a lower-spaced, I feel really bad. Mark Malman does the LOL, and it drives me nuts. I did. It's all I knew. When I'm online, I prefer lowercase everything, except people's names. Really? Mm-hmm. M1Brad is on the line. Brad, you there? Yes, sir. What is L-U-L-Z? Plural of LOL. Like, if you're laughing about it, I did it for the LOLs. It's something you do to get perfect. No, he didn't. He says they spelled S-H wrong. He said they spelled it wrong on purpose. Oh. Oh, my gosh. I could have sworn he said the S-H word. He didn't. They spelled. He said they spelled it wrong on purpose. I don't think so. He did. Why would he say that? I don't know, but. Accidentally. I'm glad that we did it just in case. J-I-C, just in case. Maybe a heart attack. Mm-hmm. We know about those. So, check this out. Sandra Bullock was, you know, she made her first appearance on TV. She was on Spike TV, Guys Channel. They were doing the Guys Choice Awards Saturday night. And she won the Troops Choice Award for Entertainer of the Year. She made a joke. Sympathy vote. The blind side. Sympathy vote. She made a joke and the joke was it kind of had to do with troops. And I kind of winced. When you say troops, you mean military troops? Yeah. Yeah.

3:09:06Tell me what you think of this. Just for a moment. We're all going to be honest, right? Did I win this for being Entertainer of the Year? Or did I win this because of the spectacular IED explosion that became my personal life? No, it's okay. It's okay. Because I would do it over and over and over again if it was to entertain our troops. Really? When I first heard it, I just thought, Well, there's nothing funnier to the troops than IEDs. Right. Oh, my goodness. I mean, but I could be totally, maybe I heard it completely different than most people. Because it was dead silent when she first said it. It was like, she makes an IED joke. You know what IED is? It's a roadside bomb. No. You don't? No. Yeah, IED is a roadside bomb. Oh, God. She called her life an IED?

3:10:20Yeah, too. I did not know that. I'm going to get filleted for that, probably. Yeah, well, I mean, no. I mean, you're not going to get filleted for not knowing what it is. But you know who does know what it is? You know who knows what it is? Well, I knew what it was. Well, you saw the Hurt Locker. Yeah, the Hurt Locker. That's what they're talking about. It's all about IEDs. But you know who else knows it? Troops. Troops. Troops. Yeah, I mean, as someone who lost a friend that was killed by an IED, I'm like, hmm. You did? Oh, yeah. Really? Yeah. Oh, my gosh. I'm like, that's kind of a... That's kind of... I don't know. I don't think it would bother him because it's like saying dynamite or the bomb that my life became. All of those that you just used seem fine with me. Better than IED put together specifically by terrorists. The IEDs, man? That's just a sore subject, it seems like. Aren't they all the explosives that are put in the roads and that are activated by... you know, stepping on or rolling over. I think it's all kinds of, like, homemade things that are just basically masked there to kill. I'm overthinking it. Yeah. But it's to kill citizens as well as, you know, the troops. It's not, I don't know. IEDs? Yeah, I mean, it's just, I don't know. I'm overthinking it. I think, how about she just came out. She's been going through a rough time. Good for her. She won an award. But she said, didn't she say IED bomb? Wouldn't it just be better to just say bomb? I don't know.

3:11:43Or even explosion that my life has become. Yeah. What's the deal with this porn actor that's been... I just say the word porn actor. You didn't just have to say the word porn. What's the deal with the porn actor that's being sought in... Don't laugh. This is serious. I know. The news is like this weekend... While I'm getting my news stories together, like last night, I was just like... Everything is so depressing right now. Read the headline, Peter. This porn actor is accused of killing somebody and then jumping off a cliff. Damn it. Yeah. You bricked it. Well, this porn actor, his name is Stephen Clancy Hill. He basically attacked three co-workers in this house where they were shooting pornos with a samurai sword last week. Are you kidding me? I read about it. Yeah, they say he just lost it.

3:12:41Whoa. Yeah, just like flipped out. Well, he died over the weekend on Saturday by falling off a cliff in California when police used a stun gun to subdue him. Yeah. That is a gnarly story. Really gnarly. I'm not familiar with his work. I don't really know who he is. Yeah. M1 Brian from PB. Hey, Mikey, I don't think you were overthinking that. I just don't see that as funny or appropriate. That's our armed forces that have lost their lives. And I don't think you're overthinking that. It's just it's not very funny. Well, the reason I thought I was maybe overthinking it is because I know a couple guys in the military, and that's the biggest fear. IED. IEDs are the biggest killer, man. That's what they face, the IEDs. I mean, the way I wasn't, I mean, like, I didn't even know what an IED was, so I can't really talk, but I think she was, basically, her whole thing was just to say how much she appreciates the troops, you know? And that she, in the end, she's just like, I would do it a million times if I could do, like, make the troops happy.

3:13:42We're definitely using that in the wrong context. You know what I mean? It's improvised explosive device. I think she was trying to be like, hey, look how much I know about what's going on. I'm going to make a joke about something. And I'll work something in that you guys know about. The reason we know about it is because our bros are getting killed. That's what, like when I heard it, I was like, oh my God. That's not good. Yeah. It was... I mean, when she did it, when she first said it, when she first says the joke... Yeah. I don't know. I mean, maybe she shouldn't have said it, but I just... I think the last thing she meant was to... No, I think so, too. She meant to put your finger at herself. She didn't mean to slam anybody. She just... She thought it would be funny. Ha-ha, joke's on me. My life's a train wreck. And it just probably wasn't. Train wreck would have been better to say. That would have worked.

3:14:41Rush Limbaugh just got married for the fourth time. He did. Over in Perfectville? Who's a lucky lady? Oh, my gosh. He's 63 years old. And Catherine Rogers, who he married, is 33. Good 30 years. She's a pretty girl. I'm sure loves him for who he is, too. Absolutely. It wouldn't be that $5 million hanging out of a zipper, would it? No. Zipper. Why would he have $5 million in his zipper? Because it's the only way he can get a 33-year-old. Putting it in a zipper? It's a $5 million bill. In a zipper. Walks around. Five million dollar bill. Sir Elton John performed at the wedding on Saturday night with 400 guests. Would you like to know how much his fee was? A million. A million dollars. A million bucks. A million dollars. You don't really see those two hobnobbing. You know what I mean? He's like a hardcore. He's a basher. So if we raised a million dollars, we could have Elton John. Independence Jam. Yeah. Well, Rush Limbaugh, too. I mean, obviously he has some connections. A million bucks. What's up with the dude in Nevada that he wanted 30 days in jail instead of quitting pot? What's that all about? I'm sorry. I think it's kind of phenomenal. Oh, gosh. His name is Charles Ray Balzer. And, yeah, basically the judge said he got in some trouble.

3:16:04And the judge said, look, he has a medical marijuana card and said, you need to go to jail for 30 days or else you need to stop drinking and smoking altogether for a year. And he said, look, I'll take the 30 days in jail because I need the medical marijuana. I guess he had a back injury. And the reason he was even in court was a harassment charge. Apparently he harassed a girl. And it came out that, you know, he had marijuana in his system. And so, yeah, he chose. 30 days in jail. So this guy's going to be going to jail on Friday, June 11th. Yeah, I think it's this Friday. I looked all over our house this weekend for my keys. You know where they were? In my shoe. Why? I don't know how they got there. You ever lose your keys and you're looking around? Yeah, probably Jake. Yeah. I've done that with like my cell phone or my keys. I'll be in my closet doing something and I end up putting them like. While I'm doing something, I put it up there. And then for like an hour, I'm like, where did I put that? Where do you put it? In a drawer. You find it in some goofy place? Well, actually, it's really funny that you said this. We were looking for my mom's keys this weekend over at my parents' house. I was hanging out. And my mother, oh, my mom, she's like, oh, I have a meeting. You know, I can't find my keys. I can't find my keys. She's looking for a half hour. We're just kind of ignoring her. Like, good luck finding a mom. Right.

3:17:22Finally, she's like, okay, you guys, I really, I need to go. I need to go. Like, help me find them. Help me find them. I don't know where they are. Did you look in the fridge? Did you look in all these places? Yes, yes, yes. I'm like, mom, did you look in your bra? Because I know, you know, it doesn't run in my family at Gallops. And there's a little extra storage space in that bra if you need to put some stuff in. For real? Yeah, I do it all the time. I put stuff in there. Like, if I'm wearing a dress and I don't want a purse. You put stuff? You put a Maybach in there, dude. No, like, I've stuck my cell phone in there, you know, and things like that. I can barely fit a Skittle in mine. Right. So I asked my mom that, and she's like, ha-ha, yes, I did. They're not in there. And so I'm like, okay. Elton John is in there. Elton John is in there. Not the keys. Oh, no. Oh, yeah. And so I'm like, okay, Mom, we're looking all over. Todd's looking. My sisters are looking. We're looking everywhere. I can't find them. Another half hour goes by. My mom goes to the bathroom. There's a little more extensive searching in the bra. The keys were in there the whole time. Get out. Get out. Get out. So much in there. Yeah. There's a ham sandwich in there. Maybe mine lets me look next time. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. No, I mean, and I feel her pain, you know, like they kind of get stuck underneath sometimes. Hey, Todd, I found a hoagie in here if you're hungry.

3:18:42No, my mom actually went to a party one time. She told me this. And they were all like drinking, having a good time. And one of her friends, you know, she pulled out her cell phone, which was in a bra. And one of the guys made a joke like, geez, how much stuff can you fit in there? And she's like, well, let's see. Oh, wow. Oh, my gosh. So she grabbed like one of those. Like the fire starters, the little clicker things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, oh my gosh. Shove that in there. It's sticking out, but you can store stuff with the keys in there, the phone in there. Holy cow. And she kept going in there. She woke up and she's like, did I really do that? Sienna, here's my question for you. How do you tactfully pull out whatever it is you put there? Well, do it right now. I know, but how are you going to take... Okay, there's a highlighter. But how are you going to get that out in front of me without... Totally tripping me out. Wow. Wow and wow. You can't tell. No way. I just shook a highlighter in my bra. You can't tell. Now, how would you take that thing out of there without me totally knowing? Well, just like turn around real quick and it's out. Wow. She's a magician. That's great. You turn really quick and you pull it out. Guys do not have that kind of a deal. Storage space. Hey, not every girl has that kind of deal. I'll tell you that much.

3:19:54Let me tell you, if I could get them smaller, I would do it in a second. I may do it after the baby's born. Storage. Who is this? Who's on the phone? Wait a minute. Hello? Hello? Wait. Hello? Who is this? Wait a minute. Can't hear. For whatever reason, I can't hear. I got it on. I got the phone on and everything. Hello? I can't hear it. I got this thing turned up. I got the line on. It's broken. I know. You broke it. We got a break anyway. Hello? I can hear it, but it's like way in the background. Yeah, it's weird sounding. The phone is messed up. Look. My part mom is probably like, really? See how you're going to tell these stories? I know. Can you hear me now? I still can't hear it. I don't know. We'll figure it out. Let's see. What do I got? How about this? Dudes, did you know that you're telling girls a lot by the way that you flirt with them?

3:21:05In fact, when we come back, I'm going to unpack the way that you flirt, what it says about you. And I want to know, I don't know, I purposefully told Sienna, don't tell me yet. Because I want to see what kind of, like what it tells me about me, the way that I flirt. We'll find out next. The way you flirt. Yeah. Do you flirt now, Mike? I don't flirt now, but. The way you used to flirt. I know how I'm, I know what kind of flirt I am. Yeah. Okay. I'm bored, I'm a captain. So climb aboard. We'll search for tomorrow. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Do you remember when you used a dial-up to access the internet? Remember how slow that was?

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3:25:21Hey, can you guys keep it down? Rude. You're the one with all the browser windows open, mister. Switch to high-speed internet from AT&T. Starting at just $19.95 a month with no home phone required. Call 1-800-PICK-ATT or visit att.com slash no cord. Taxes, excessive usage, and other charges apply. Quoted price for internet direct basic up to 768k speed and requires one year term commitment. DSL modem or router required. For details, visit att.com slash offer details. Trust me, breaking up is not always hard to do, especially with a bank that's not treating you right. Alita here. Not long ago, I found someone new in my financial life. California Coast Credit Union. Unlike my old bank, they drive me crazy in a good way. Like auto loans as low as 3.98% APR for new used or refis. So ditch your bank and get better rates today. Call California Coast at 877-495-1600. Restrictions apply. Rates subject to change. California Coast Credit Union. It's about you. After reading. After discussing. After searching, you realize that at this school, you don't memorize the answers to questions. You ask them. The Rady School of Management at UC San Diego. Innovators under construction. Learn more at rady.ucsd.edu. Now, back to the Mikey Show. Mikey. I don't have any, you know, athletic abilities. Sienna. I'm like a little bit Irish. There's everything white I am. Woods. I mean, hey, listen, I did snuff on the planet, okay? Lauren. I was a bit of a pyro when I was a kid.

3:26:47I knew how it worked. I knew how destructive it was. I still started fires on the regs. And Jay, this is a paid gig. I'm 100% in. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Yellow Slicker? Say what? Is this Yellow Slicker? Yeah, it's Yellow Slicker. The Eskimo Blue Water song? Yeah, it's Eskimo Blue Water song. You can recognize immediately Yellow Slicker. What is it, Slicker? Icker. Icker. Icker. It's a good song. Sienna's playing the music today. My son's on the phone. My 10-month-old son, one of the twins. He's on the phone? Yeah, Luke. You there, Luke? Wait a minute. Luke, are you there? Yep. He's 10 months old. He's my son.

3:27:52His brother's Ryan, twin brother's Ryan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, I heard you crying because you lost your keys in the shoe. You found those, huh? Yeah, first of all, I wasn't crying about it. Maybe a little bit. No, I wasn't crying about it. I was mentioning on the radio that I lost my keys, and then I found them in the shoe. I assume that Jake did it. Oh, you found my little hiding spot. Oh, really? Didn't you? You hide my keys. Always got to be sniffing around, don't you? Your own shoes? My own shoes. My own shoes is sniffing around. Sniffing around is putting on my own pair of shoes. I can't see too well. Is that Magnum P.I. over there? Really? Actually, it is. You shouldn't be talking to your father like that. Yeah, you shouldn't be talking to me like that. Maybe you mind your own business. Whoa, mouthy a little bit. Listen, Luke, don't talk to Aunt Tiana like that. Sorry, I got a bad apple juice hangover. My bad. Really? Geez. I imbibed a little too much last night. What did you do? I drank too much apple juice. I just said that. You know, you don't have to be such a smarty pen. He used a big word like imbibed. Yeah, really? Ten months old, he used imbibed? Is that what you say? Okay. What is that in the background? That's my clown brother crying. Your brother Brian? Shut it. You want mom in here? Shut your mouth. He's your twin. He's just supposed to be close. Shut your mouth. Shut your mouth. Shut your mouth. Don't tell him. Hey, Captain. What? Don't call me Captain. I'm dead. What time are you coming home?

3:29:15I'm coming home the same time, every time. What time do you get off work? I get off work at 10. You ask me that every time. All right. Well, you got to take me to do something later. What? Because I'm freaking bored out of my mind. What would you like me to take you to do? Whatever, man. Let's go see a movie or something. I don't know. Together? Yeah. I guess. Together. What choice do I have? Got enough around everything I do. You're a baby. Am I? Yeah, you are. You're 10 months old. Yeah. Maybe you think so. What would you like to go see? I don't know. Get him to the Greek. Really? That's an R-rated movie. How about Splice? Really? It's an R-rated horror movie. How about Killers? Really? Because Katherine Heigl's a piece of A, if you know what I mean. I do know what you mean. And you're 10 months old, you're a baby, you're out of line. Am I, am I, am I, am I, am I? Yeah, I learned that one from Uncle Woods. Don't learn anything from Uncle Woods. No, really? Yeah. Really? Yeah, he is. This guy's my hero. Really? My hero. I guess I need to find a new hiding spot now because I got the good Gestapo looking for keys every day. How are you going to drive the car anyway? Don't worry about it. You can't drive. I got a stash of phone books hidden and I got a pole to push the levers. Maybe I get some real mileage out of that car since you don't. Okay? Drive like a little old lady. Oh, my God. Your dad just likes to stick by the speed limit. Yeah, tell me about it, Sienna.

3:30:40How are you doing, by the way? I'm doing good. How are your cans? Good? Luke. He's a baby. Luke. Luke. What? I'm hungry. I know it. You're 10 months old. Go get off the phone. Really? Yes. I'm going to go beat up Ryan. I'll see you later. All right. Goodbye. Go do baby things. Goodbye. Go do baby stuff. Poor Ryan. He is going to get beat up by Luke. His brother. Jake's going to be the nice one. I know it. Oh, man. Had nothing to do with that. Really? Yep. I got name dropped in there. I did nothing. That little Luke. Sure, sure. He was on one last night. Yeah, he was. He was really on one. Apple too much apple juice. All right, Sienna, I got to know. What is the way that I flirt say about me? Well, there's five different types of flirting, according to this article that I got from Yahoo. Here's what I want you to do. I want you to tell me the five different types of flirt, okay? And then I want you and Lauren to tell me, Woods, and Jay what you think we are after hearing them. Okay. There's the playful flirt. Now, this is the guy that, you know, is chats you up, can flatter you all day. He does not really want to date you, though. You know, he's just there to like have fun and just, you know, slay you. Yeah, basically that the physical flirt. You won't miss this guy. He basically just.

3:31:56Like checks you out and makes it really obvious that he's interested, but not in a creepy way. Like he doesn't creep you out. He makes you like, oh, he thinks I'm hot, you know? Right. He doesn't want to date you either. Then there's the sincere flirt. Now, this is the guy that wants to get to know you. And yes, he does want to date you. Then there's the traditional flirt, which you may either think, depending on who you are, a chauvinist. You may think this guy's a chauvinist or he's just refreshingly old fashioned. He, you know. Goes by traditional gender roles, and he does want to date you. And the last one is the polite flirt. Now, this is the guy that, you know, he doesn't really like going out to the bar scene, but he's there to be with his friends. And, yeah, he does want to meet girls, but, you know, that's not really his scene. He's just kind of there to, like, I'll do it. And he does want to date you. I've got you all pegged. Okay. Oh, yeah? The playful flirt, the physical flirt, the sincere flirt, the traditional flirt, and the polite flirt. Sienna, what is Woodsy? The playful flirt. Which one is that? That's the one that will charm you. The first one. The very first one. Chat you up. Chat you up real good. Which one is Woodsy? Playful. You agree? Mm-hmm. Jay's harder to pinpoint. Jay, I know Jay. And Woodsy, that's correct? 100%. Jay's the physical flirt. Is Jay the physical flirt? Yeah. What is that one again? The physical flirt's the one that makes it real obvious that you're into them, but checks out the goods and compliments them. How are you doing? But it's not creepy.

3:33:22But it's not creepy. I don't know. I think I would say Jay's probably- He said he fell in love at first sight with his wife when she walked down the ramp in her bathing suit. Yeah. Something special right there. I'll tell you. I can't see Jay, like, complimenting, like, their body parts and stuff, though. I don't know. He always does. I mean, yeah, but not to your face. So which one do you think is? I think he's probably the playful one, too. So you say the playful. You say the physical, Lauren. What are you, Jay? I'm playfully physical. Combination of both. Physically playful. And Mike? Polite. I know exactly which one I am. I think the sincere. Lauren? Polite. I'm the sincere. Yeah. A hundred. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Mikey wants to get to know you. Like, he's there, and while he's in a conversation, he wants to know all about you, what you're all about. Every single other one, for me, would be totally phony. What about polite? For me. It'd be phony if I did it. You go out to the bars and you kind of let your guys do your thing. You're like, I'll just, I'll sit silently in the wings here. No, but when you were dating though, I could see you wanting to go out and meet people. Yeah. And when I did, when I did like, I can't any of those other ones that were named.

3:34:35If I did that, I would feel like a total phony because it's so opposite of my nature. Yeah. All of the other ones are opposite of my nature. That's like Mike loves to just get to know people. Oh, yeah. And what they're all about, what they're interested in. Like even random callers. He does that with guys and girls. I mean, he does that even with Woods. Yeah, he's not bisexual. It's all right. He's not. First of all. He has three kids at home and a wife. It's beautiful. Yeah. Yeah. This is Woods and Mike's song. Is it? This is the most mortifying song. Why? Because Jay plays it. A little too close. You guys are bros. See, Woods embraces it. I love it. When he plays Endless Love. I'm happy. I love that song. Do you love it in the context that me and you are having a bromance? My first love. He loves it. Mikey, you're every breath that I take. You're every move I make. That makes me a little bit creeped out and uncomfortable. He's watching you. But you know what? At least you're sincere. You're a sincere flirt. Yeah. No, I'm playful. It makes you feel real good. That's right. Got me really, really upset when you said that. I wonder how obese Mikey would have flirted. I would have said that. Do try the cheeseburger. You want to try my cheeseburger? You taste like bacon. Yeah. Can I lick your hand to see if it tastes like pork products? Can I eat your face off? Wow. Oh, wow. Can I eat your face off?

3:36:05Jobs were up last month. Were they? Yeah, but there's a caveat. It's not what you think probably. Jobs were up, but there has to be a little bit of an explanation that goes along with why jobs were up. In the U.S. or in San Diego? This report is a sign that our economy is getting stronger by the day. Now, I want to emphasize that most of the jobs this month that we're seeing in the statistics represent workers who've been hired. to complete the 2010 census. Do you hear the S's every time now? Yeah. I do. Yeah, jobs are up. The census jobs are up. Yeah. The people that we get to find out if jobs are up are what making jobs go up. That is correct. Did you guys do your census? Rebecca takes care of that. You know that. You didn't do yours, LLB?

3:36:58I didn't either. Sure I did. Why don't you? I didn't do mine. Because I lost it in the move. Because Rebecca. I have a wife that doesn't. I lost mine in the move. I had every intention of doing it. Honey, you need to make that right, okay? I don't want to get arrested. Can't you get, like, in trouble? Do you? Yeah, you can. You can? What are you going to do, L.O.B.? What do you mean? You've got to get a new one, right? If they send it to me. Do it online. You can do it online. Can you? Yeah. Do it online. Census take. I once tried to test me. Don't they come to the door? I wouldn't answer the door for them. No, one came to my house. I wouldn't answer it. And I was mean. Get out of here, stupid census taker. I was mean. And I got Todd and he was mean. Todd was? You're like, get out. One of our listeners said on Facebook last week that they came to the door and that they kept knocking and kept knocking and woke the kid up. I don't answer the door for anybody. Get off my property. Yeah. It's an invasion, man. It was a Saturday evening at like 6.30. That's weird. Yeah, and I'm like, really? Are you going to show up at my house? And I said, I don't need to do this. And he's like, yeah, it's the law. You want me to show you the law? And I'm like, what, are you going to arrest me? See, especially if I was home alone, no way. That's nuts.

3:38:06No, I got, Todd saw me like out there and he's like, came out, he's like, what are you doing? You know, because it's just people come to the door all the time. It's like, oh, really? Yeah. Of course he came at 630. I mean, what is he going to come during the day when people are at work? Well, I said, I said, what if I didn't answer? But I have dinner with my family. Right. He's like, it's the law. Yeah. How about they don't come? Yeah, seriously. They're trying to make it where we have proper, you know, everything for our communities. I have an idea. Firemen or trash receptacles, all that kind of stuff. You need to know how many people are in your area. Our dog was barking. It was like, oh, I'm sorry. I just don't like the door-to-door visit. Why don't they do it wirelessly? Well, then maybe you should have filled out the paperwork. They should. Nobody came to my door. And Jace got it right. I guess it is good to know. It's just. Oh, it is good to know. It's got to be a better. It is, though. Yes. Come to my house during the week at like three in the afternoon. I'll be there. You get more. Your community gets more dollars from the federal government by the amount of people that you have. Schools get more money for the kids that are there. You know, it's important. That is. And here's how I think they should do it. They should have a national day. Census day. They give us a day off work. Make it right. Should be like the taxes day.

3:39:16You know when it is. Maybe they give us the day off work. You know what? I like what L.O.B. just said. I like it too, but you know, I tried to fill mine out. It would have taken me seven hours to fill it out. Why? Because it's so long. That's... Why aren't they just asking how many people live in your house? They need more than that. They want to know how much you spend on certain things. Oh, come on. It's insane. I'll show it to you. It'll blow your mind. Really? I have to tell you how much I spend? I understand how many people live here, stuff like that. And how many people BS the thing anyway. I know I would just to get through it. But aren't you guys curious how many people live in San Diego with the ratio of guys to girls? I totally am. What kind of budgets are school systems? We wouldn't have all that information without census. How many questions would you say? 200. It's huge. It's huge. You're exaggerating. I'll show you. It's huge, isn't it? You're exaggerating. Isn't it? I don't think there's 200. They asked me like 10. Really? Yeah. In person, maybe. Yeah. Yeah, no. Because I was probably not nice. That's why I ate. Let me get away from this awful woman. Yeah, exactly. It goes on your nerves. Nice, Kathy. And when Grace is calling from North Park. Hi. What up? Well, it's kind of weird that jobs are up because my company, it's a biotech. I can't say the name, but they just...

3:40:33fired 600 people. Ouch. What is biotech? What do they do? Pharmaceutical, like clinical trials. Got it. That's sad. I'm sorry to hear that. Luckily, I survived. I'm glad. Good for you. Thank you. Thanks for calling, Woods. Well, this one says, okay, there's 10 questions on this, but then it says, note, the form cannot be filled out online. You need to fill it out and mail it back. That's what I remember it saying. No, but it's still long. Trust me. Somebody call in. No, somebody call in with the real one, the paper one that you have in front of you, and tell us how many questions. It's ridiculous. Ooh, that's a good song, Sienna. A script, Man Who Can't Be Moved. Instantly like that. They don't understand how it makes... Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. One, two, three. June 11th is opening day at the fair and they're handing out my prize pack. A reusable shopping bag with coupons and prizes valued at over $500. And you can enter to win a trip to the Calgary Stampede. Visit sdfair.com now.

3:42:18At Navy Federal, people ask us how we keep our mortgage rates so exceptionally low. I can tell you in about two seconds. We're member-owned and not-for-profit, so we focus on serving our members and keeping our rates low. Okay, that actually took 14 seconds, but this commercial is 30 seconds, so let me tell you quickly to go to NavyFederal.org and use the mortgage calculator tool to see what you can save. I also have time to say we serve all branches of the military and the DOD. Navy Federal. We serve where you serve. And we're timely. Equal housing lender. On an all-new Fox Monday, there's no lie too big. I smell the cover-up. There's no crime too small. We're literally going after a candy burglar. It's the premieres of Lie to Me and The Good Guys. First, Dr. Cal Lightman is back.

3:43:08As the world's foremost expert in deception detection. How can you tell when I stop lying? You shut your mouth. But when he faces a student with a dark secret. You killed that missing girl. Finding the truth could be deadly. You're gonna lose this game. It's the summer premiere of Lie to Me. Then, it's the new action comedy that rocks the good guys. You got a war-enforced storage unit, found a body, then came under fire from an unknown assailant. And then everything exploded. Critics rave. Crime and comedy do mix. Bringing up the big guns on that one. Big guns is all I carry. Bradley Whitford and Colin Hanks star in The Good Guys. Premiering right after the summer premiere of Lie to Me. It all starts tonight at 8 p.m. on Fox 5 San Diego. The hottest new bar in the gas lamp? No doubt about it. The Tipsy Crow at 5th and 8th. The Tipsy Crow. Great name, great bar. Every Monday at the Tipsy Crow, it's game night with trivia, shuffleboard, board games, even weed. Every Friday and Saturday night, three levels of entertainment with something for everybody. From a full dance floor to Jumbo Connect 4. Classic, crazy, cool. The Tipsy Crow with the gas lamp's best craft beer collection. Check out the daily specials at thetipsycrow.com.

3:44:18The Tipsy Crow, corner of 5th and F in the gas lamp. Great name, great bar. Hey, it's Mikey for AIS. I just want you to know AIS has been in business for more than 40 years, which should mean something to you. What that should tell you is usually when a company's in business for over 40 years, they're doing something right, and they are. Now, the average savings for a person with AIS is $650 a year with their auto insurance. That's a lot of money. Here's something else to consider. I saved... $1,600 a year by switching over to AIS. Now, I've got my parents doing it. I have members of my family doing it. I wouldn't do that unless I actually really felt strongly about this company, and I do. I've been in business with AIS for many years, and the reason is because of people just like you that have called them, and they've actually experienced the savings. You can do that. 1-800-777-4AIS. That number again, 1-800-777-4AIS. 777-4247. Give AIS a call and tell them that Mikey sent you. We made it to Barcelona, Mom. Oh, I'm so proud of you for planning this and I get to meet my new nephew. Uncle Tim should be here any minute. Oh, they're picking us up? No, we only have a few hours before our flight. Our flight where? Back.

3:45:35Home, we can't afford to stay. Excuse me. It pays to check CheapFlights.com. With over 4 million deals in one place, you can go where you never thought you could and have money left over to actually enjoy it. Check first and never miss the chance to get a better deal. Hey, it's called CheapFlights.com for a reason. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I want to be a movie director more than anything else. Sienna. Only time all it's finished is if it's in Artichoke Devil. Woods. I like to grease the maitre d's from time to time. Lauren. Yellow means speed up. Yep. Yellow means hurry up and go. And Jay. I don't watch sports. I have nothing to do. If I'm not playing, I don't want to see it. On FM 94.9. And I. The Punisher. Yeah. And there was a preview on for the movie like years ago. And I was like, what is this song? And I searched, like, the Punisher and stuff, and I found it. I was like, I love it. Cedar and Amy Lee from Evanescence. Yeah. When they were still dating. Oh, were they dating? Yeah, it was a very, very unhealthy and ugly breakup. But I thought she was dating the guy in her own band. She was. And then she dated this guy? Mm-hmm. Just a little bit of a hooah, I think. God, listen to those harmonies. They sound good together. Yeah.

3:47:05He's got a little bit of that. That's what happens when he sings, though. If that's what happens when you sing, what are you going to do? It doesn't happen. It's a style. It is a style. Yeah, but you know that some people go, and they're really puking it out, like trying to make it sound that way. Some people like Jessica Simpson. I like the way he sounds. I like this song. She sings like an angel. The problem. And she's the exception. I have. I used to get in so much trouble because I would say, I don't like females fronting rock bands. I don't. And the reason is because I just think of it as such a testosterone-y thing, you know? Testosterone and cheese. I know, dude. It's delicious. But I love female singers. I do too, but I like the female singer in a rock band like Amy Lee that's feminine.

3:48:07And doesn't try to be, like, all hard on me. Like Joe Jett? It's hard for, like, a guy to go to a girl rock band concert and, like, get into it. That's it. You know? That's it. I can't imagine going to a Pat, like, you being like, yeah, I went to Pat Benatar. I'd be like, really? I'll tell you what, though. Can you imagine your friend, Bark Malman, putting on the leather gloves? You like leather gloves? At, you know, at a Pat Benatar concert? I don't know, man. I saw, or, you know, I've seen... clips of the Dead Weather, which is Jack White's band. And the girl in his band is a freaking rock star. I mean, Gwen Stefani, like... Oh, yeah. I mean, I think that, obviously, I love girl singers. Yeah. But fronting a rock band, doing the, like, I'm tough thing, I'm not... Pink. Oh, yeah. Oh, my gosh. Pink is so hardcore on stage. No, but she's like... Like, even the guy, like, short hair. She climbs up everything. Queen of farty. Yeah, I just can't get into it. No, I'm on the same page as you. Can't get the vibe. Did you know Tyler Perry wants a doctor's note?

3:49:21from Mariah Carey. I mean, he was kind of joking about it, kind of, but I think there's some... A little bit of truth. Exactly. Well, he and Mariah Carey are supposed to be in this new movie that they're going to start shooting any day now for Colored Girls. That's what the movie's called. That's what the movie is called. I was like, Sienna, you can't just say that. That's what the movie's called for Colored Girls. Yeah. Sienna's like, it's actually called African American Girls, but I'm just calling it what it is, Colored Girls. It's called Four Colored Girls. I'm going to repeat that again. Is it like F-O-U-R? No, look. Four Colored Girls. That's what it's called. And Mariah dropped out five days before they began shooting. Can you imagine she signed on to do this and she said, well, you know, a doctor had advised me not to do the film. And he's like, well, let me see a doctor's note. You can't just do something like that. We had an agreement. We had a deal. If our show were on in Los Angeles, I would love to be in a motion picture, to be a part of the movie-making process. 100%. Let me tell you, if I was not in radio, my dream would be to direct film. You'd be a really good director. You just said that in your last video. I did? Yeah. You have like a...

3:50:33Well, first, you have a really good attention to detail, but you're also really descriptive, too, which is what you need, I think, to be a good director. I think it would be so rad. I love it. I'd feel so much pressure. To be what? To be a director? It's like, oh, the day that movie comes out, you're like, I'm dead. I'm dead. It's awful. How would you ever be like, yes? You know what? It's your art, and it's your craft, and that's what you do, and who cares, you know? If you're happy with it, who cares? It's like writing a song. My songs are turds. That's why nobody else gets to hear them. I would like to hear your so-called turds because he says so bad. Every time. It sounds like the Backstreet Boys. L.O.B. just gave me the hand again. You guys are in love. Why? Can't compliment your friend? She gave the hand. Can't compliment your friend, huh? Really? Fine, you suck. I suck. Listen. I would love to hear your private thoughts and emotions. What did he say? Don't worry about it. Don't repeat it. That was phenomenal. Was it? Yes. Mandate. Listen. Woodsy always says he's the worst songwriter ever. Aren't you curious how bad it is or if it really is bad? I don't think it's probably bad. He's a creative guy. It's freaking terrible. Has Jamie ever heard any? Yeah, I wrote them for her.

3:52:03I wrote the songs for her. Is that like a Valentine's present? No. How does one go? Lyrics to one. Just one line. I have a copy of one of his. Do you? No, you don't. I can play it. No, you don't have a copy of mine. I do. You do not have a copy of mine. It's not yours. It's mine. It's your copy. No, it's the only song I've ever written and recorded. It's one of yours. Yeah. Oh, this is a Mikey original. Let's hear it. Mike. Don't laugh. This is mine. This is what I do. I sit on you. Sit on you. Sit on you. This is what I do. I sit on you. Right on your lap. This is what I do. I sit on you. Sit on you. Sit on you. This is what I do. I sit on you. Right on your head. This is what I do. This is what I do. This is what I do is sit on you. This is what I do is sit on you. Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit on you. Well, listen, if you guys are not going to take my music seriously. I love it. It's hard to take that. What if he really did write that? You know what? It's pretty deep. You've got to actually think about it. This is what I do while I sit on you. It's not a very overt message. No. I'd appreciate it if you didn't sit on my head. Fair enough. I'm just saying. Right on your head. First time you hear it, you're like, oh, I don't really get it. You have to listen to it a few times.

3:53:32Here's a song I wrote about the summertime. Beach Blast! What is that? This stuff is on his iTunes. That's the scary question. I'm yet a summer that will never forget. All over Malibu, there will be so much to do. We just arrived at the show. Oh my gosh. Oh wow. It will be a beach blast. Oh my goodness. Nauseous now. Nauseous. If I play you guys in here my private stuff anymore.

3:54:43Hillary just came in. Yay, she's back. How's your voice, y'all? What is going on? What was the deal? It was so weird. Like, Wednesday during my show, I felt a little hoarse, and then Tommy walked in, and he's like, yeah, I feel a little hoarse, too. Little horses running around. There were some horses coming here. I didn't feel sick at all. Just felt hoarse, woke up Thursday morning. I had no voice. Like, it was freaky. So you were like... Yeah. Nothing came out. Yeah, I called Garrett at like 7 a.m. to let him know I can't work today, and he called me back and was laughing. I mean, it was so bad. What? You were up here, though. I came up Friday because I just had to do some paperwork. Oh, okay. File some papers? No, not at home here. Not at home here. You weren't sick, though. Not sick at all. You just lost your voice. I went to movies. I went and saw the new Sex and the City movie. How was it? I was like, I feel great. Right. But I had no voice. Was it genuine laryngitis? Like, genuinely? It was gone. Like, it was freaky. I saw Lauren and Woodsy on Friday, and it was starting to come back a little Friday. So it was like a 24-hour thing, and then it was completely back on Saturday. No, it was still pretty hoarse Saturday. Yesterday was better. I would say this is not 100%, but it's...

3:56:04What a trip. Yeah, it was freaky. I wouldn't mind it if it was like, because then I get a break, you know, I get, like, chill my voice out. Seriously. That's why I didn't go to Mumford & Sons last night. Why? Because I was starting to get a little hoarse and I was like, oh my gosh, I'm going to have a case of the Hillary's. I didn't want to go to Mumford & Sons and yell over the music and make it even worse. See, I've thought to myself sometimes that it'd be good to just chill them out for a while. Chill out the pipes. That'd be nice for you. Then if you, as long as you're not sick, you know, that stinks. But it was also kind of frustrating because I love my job. Yeah. So do not like to drive around and listen to Hanson doing my show. And I felt a hundred percent. I was like, yeah. Oh yeah. Did you have to write stuff down? That kind of business? Or are you just kind of... It wasn't that bad. But my daughter, trying to, like, get her... I was, like, clapping. You know, like... Yeah. I should try and get her attention. You know? How did you like the new Sex and the City? Yeah, I didn't love it. Really? That's what I'm hearing. My wife said the same thing. I loved the series. Yeah. And the first movie was fun. Yeah. Why am I... It's not right.

3:57:12What do you got coming up today, Hill? Oh, I grabbed Broken Bells and Rogue Waves, new ones, some old Elvis Costello, old Smiths, Strokes. Sweet. Edward Sharps. Weird. There you go. All right, we will clear the way here. Lovely and talented Hillary is coming up next. We will be back tomorrow morning at 6 o'clock. The Mikey Show is out late. A Lincoln Financial radio station, Mikey in the Morning. About the music all day and night. FM 94.9 It's about the music.