The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 06/27/11
Monday, June 27, 2011
weight lossTSA elderly woman diaper pat‑downJeff Bridges concert ticket giveawayword of the day flashlighttop five men killersperfect woman appearanceWhy Are We Here? gameName That Tune gameFlorence Henderson crabs storyNovak Djokovic dog PierreMichelle Bachman presidential bidDexter cat memorial
Mikey opened the show talking about his weight loss efforts, sunburn, and feeling disgusting, then discussed with his wife Rebecca whether he looks fat. The show featured a lengthy discussion about a TSA pat‑down of a 95‑year‑old woman in a wheelchair who was asked to remove her adult diaper, with Woodsy, Sienna, Jay and Lauren O’Brien debating whether the procedure was necessary or excessive. Later, Mikey gave away tickets to a sold‑out Jeff Bridges “Bad Blake” concert in Phoenix using the word‑of‑the‑day “flashlight,” and the crew played games such as “Why Are We Here?” (Garrett and Jay at a yoga studio) and “Name That Tune” (America‑themed music quiz). Other segments included Sienna’s list of the top five causes of death for men, a debate about the “perfect woman” based only on appearance, the story of Florence Henderson giving Craig Brady crabs, Novak Djokovic’s missing dog Pierre at Wimbledon, and a memorial for Mikey’s cat Dexter.
What happened, in order
Mikey's weight‑loss check‑in
Mikey talks about his workout routine, feeling disgusting after sun, and asks his wife Rebecca if he looks fat.
TSA elderly woman diaper pat‑down
The crew discusses a 95‑year‑old wheelchair‑bound woman who was asked to remove her adult diaper during a TSA screening, debating whether the procedure was justified.
Giovanni Ramirez and Peter Falk tribute
Mikey notes the arrest of Giovanni Ramirez for beating a Giants fan and pays tribute to the late Peter Falk, recalling his Columbo catch‑phrase.
Jeff Bridges concert ticket giveaway
Using the word‑of‑the‑day “flashlight,” Mikey offers tickets to the sold‑out Jeff Bridges “Bad Blake” show in Phoenix to caller nine.
Top five men killers discussion
The show begins a segment on the leading causes of death for men, leading into Sienna’s later list of heart disease, cancer, accidents, COPD and stroke.
Sienna’s top five men killers list
Sienna enumerates the top five killers of men: heart disease, cancer, accidents, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, and stroke.
Why Are We Here? game – yoga studio
Garrett and Jay improvise a scene at a yoga studio, joking about being fired and hired while trying to keep their voices down.
Dexter the cat memorial
Mikey describes plans to hold a memorial for his deceased cat Dexter, including a taxidermy display and a chance for fans to spend time with the stuffed pet.
Name That Tune – America theme
Listeners call in to guess American‑themed songs; Mikey, Lauren, Woods and Sienna compete for points with prizes of Smashburger lunch and fair tickets.
Florence Henderson crabs story
Sienna recounts how Florence Henderson allegedly gave Craig Brady crabs on the set of The Brady Bunch, sparking a humorous debate about apologies and denial.
Novak Djokovic’s missing dog Pierre
Sienna reports that Wimbledon star Novak Djokovic is upset because his dog Pierre cannot be brought to the matches, and the crew imagines the dog watching from the hotel.
Michelle Bachman presidential bid
Michelle Bachman announces her run for president, proposing to cut the federal minimum wage and corporate taxes, which Mikey critiques as favoring the rich.
People mentioned
MikeyRebeccaWoodsySiennaJayLauren O'BrienChrisJeff BridgesGiovanni RamirezBrian StowePeter FalkCasey AnthonyJose BaezTodd
38,627 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
It's going to be nice again. It's going to be such a great day. Somebody got some sun, man. I know. You look like you almost got sun burnt. I look like George Hamilton. L of me. 5701-949 is our number. You can also call us, or you can also text us 949mikey at gmail.com. I forgot to write something else for my weekend. I felt like I did nothing, but I think I did. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. I am 41. years old, and really getting closer and closer to really putting my mind to losing some weight. I'm working out with my trainer, but I'm not mentally into it. And I'm just about there. I'm just about there. I felt disgusting at one point. And that's a rare one. I don't usually feel that.
But I felt, oh, gosh, just, you know. And that usually gets me very close to where I need to be. So I'm just about there. Said to Rebecca, my wife, this weekend, I said, I don't feel that fat. Or do I look that fat? I looked in the reflection in our black vehicle. And she's like, no. And I could tell, you know. We're one person. I know what she's thinking. Fake no. Fake no. Sweet no. Sweet no. And I go, I said, well, all right. And just like that. And she goes, no. And I said, I feel like I'm the opposite of those anorexic girls that think that they're fat. I said, I feel like maybe I look in the mirror and I'm like, no, it's not that bad. Like the opposite of the anorexic girls that go, you know, they're two pounds, but they go, you're so fat.
They slap themselves. Yes. And I look in the mirror and I'm like, you know, I'm Jabba the Hutt, but I look in the mirror and I'm like, wow, look at you, Brad Pitt. You look great. This ain't too bad. Not too bad. Not too bad. Then I see a picture and I go, oh, for goodness. Oh. Oh. So. Well, you do have Carrie Fisher on a chain hanging off of. That is true. Carrie Fisher is, in fact, hanging from my neck. Yeah. In a bikini. In a bikini. Woodsy is our sports guy. He's 35 years old. And he broke his ankle, which got him to gain 10 pounds back. He had lost him. Got it back on. The belly is over the belt again. Yep. Notice that this weekend, which is always a treat. Yes. Always a treat. Yeah, Dunlap. Dunlap'd over. Oh, boy. You silly sausage. And then Lauren O'Brien. Hi. The very red Lauren O'Brien. L-O-B.
What'd you do? Got all that sun. Walked down to the beach for about an hour. That's it? Yeah. No sunscreen. I forgot. Yep. I know. And once I was there, I didn't have any. You're very fair-skinned, and so all it takes is an hour to get that much color on you. Don't worry. It'll fade to a nice tan. Yeah. It always does. Sienna is our news girl. She's 26 years of age. She has a daughter named Dej. That's my age. And... She's married to a man named Todd. And then there's Jay. He's 48. He's our producer. He's a sweet guy but loves to throw out some zingers at us. You know what I mean? Feels real good. I always look forward on Mondays the most to Jay's weekend recap. Oh, yeah. To hear what he did on the weekend. Then I like to compare it in my brain to what I did. And it usually makes me laugh. It's usually pretty similar. It's very different. Yeah. It's polar opposite. Yes. And our phone screener is Chris. That's crap. Last week, we had to take a day off because I was in the ER with a bad stomach. And so we have an extra pair of Jeff Bridges concert tickets to give away. Woodsy and I are taking our wives to Phoenix this weekend, staying with my brother, because Jeff Bridges is going to do his role as Bad Blake that he did in the movie Crazy Heart. And we're going to go see it.
Oh, you guys are going to have so much fun. I know it. Arizona Biltmore, July 3rd. Now, for word of the day today, the word of the day is flashlight. So I'll say flashlight sometime between now and 10. Could even say it during commercial break. When I say it, you got to be caller nine and you'll win tickets to go see Jeff Bridges in Phoenix this weekend. Only thing is, you got to get yourself there and have a place to stay. So for those of you listening that have family and friends in Phoenix, it's great for you. Because the concert's sold out. Now listen to that. I'm going to give you what you want. I can't wait. I can't wait. So the big story today, one of the big stories today, despite popular belief, is not that Mexico beat the United States in soccer. It is that there was a very strange happening with the TSA. Yes.
Patting down an elderly woman. Yes. Now, this happened on June 18th. An elderly woman, 95 years old, was flying with her daughter, and they were going from Florida to Michigan. Now, the elderly woman, 95 years old, is in a wheelchair, stopped by the TSA, brought into a separate room, a glassed area, where she was patted down and felt something suspicious in her diaper. She's that old she needs to wear. It depends. Oh, my God. said you're going to need to take her, your mother, to the restroom where you have to get rid of the diaper. Yeah. And so she did. They had to, you know, fully check this older woman, and they're upset about this. Apparently the 95-year-old woman was very calm. I think as upset as I am that Jay went, mm. No. When you mentioned the diaper. No, they're not that upset. No, yeah. Not that upset. That's pretty upset. And so, you know, after a story like that breaks, people who are obviously real sensitive about the TSA as is, you know, They're really mad, and the TSA administration has stood by their security officers on Sunday. They said, look, they did what the protocol was. If there's something suspicious, they need to check it out. They did it in a delicate matter. They weren't, hey, get your diaper off. They were pretty cool about it, but they had to check. They said, excuse me, ma'am, but you're going to need to remove your diaper. Very discreet.
I can't hear what you're saying. I say we're going to need to ask you to remove your diaper. I can't hear you. Something about a windshield wiper? More complaints of absurd pat-downs by the TSA. This time the air traveler isn't a kid but an elderly woman who was forced to remove her adult diaper. A Florida woman says security agents asked her 95-year-old mother, who is in a wheelchair, to remove her diaper so they could complete a full search. It happened at the Northwest Florida Regional Airport last weekend. Jean Weber says her mother was detained for 45 minutes. The pair were heading to Michigan so Weber's mother could be with family during the final stages of her battle with leukemia. That makes it much better. Hey, you know, listen. I'm all for being diligent. What about one of those wands? You know, that, you know, what about that? Can't we do that? Somebody hold her, just kind of hold her up, wand it. Okay, you're good. You can sit there, wand. But they're checking for drugs and stuff, too. She's 95. If she wants to take drugs with her, let her have it. Could be a mule. Could be a mule. She's not coming back from Venezuela. Well, maybe she's old enough where they don't, I mean, somebody could be taking advantage of her.
Yeah. Please, you guys. If she's got blow in her diaper, just let her take it. She's 95. Maybe we don't phrase it that way. That was the weirdest thing I ever had to listen to. Blow in her diaper. They said they felt something suspicious on her leg, and they couldn't determine what it was, so they took her into a closed room. It was an elastic waistband. What was it, I wonder? Elastic. Her diaper was, quote, wet and it was firm. Oh, my God. Sleeping. That's it. I gotta go. So they fell. Red is going to throw up. A full diaper. He's shaking his hands. Have they never dealt with diaper pat-downs before? I know. Come on. I know. Is it the first time ever for them? Monsters. So if it exploded and you'd go, why didn't you check her? Why didn't you check her? I wouldn't. You wouldn't. You're just like, you'll miss those people. Listen, I would listen to the explanation. This explanation would do it for me. Mr. Esparza, concerned citizen of the United States. This was a 95-year-old woman in a diaper. And I would go, oh, why didn't you say that? She's got leukemia also. She's got leukemia going to visit her family in Michigan. I'd go, why didn't you tell me?
I wouldn't be bugging you about the plane exploding if you had just said that. We did everything we thought was humanly possible. Well, if by everything you thought was humanly possible, you said, go right ahead. That's good enough for me. I'm in on the wand thing. They definitely just wanded her. They don't even need to make her take her in the back room and make her take her diaper. What did they think? That that was a bunch of explosive plastic explosives? Maybe it didn't show up on that. Maybe it's her diaper. Imagine if that was your mother. Oh, and they made her take off her diaper that she'd have to take off anyway? I would lose my mind. Lose my mind. Every terrorist out there right now is looking for a 95-year-old to take off a plane. Yes, exactly. Yeah, well, if it was full, she needed to take it off anyway. Right? Yeah. That's a good point. Not by their command. I know. When she's ready. She needed to take it off anyway, though. She needed a nice cleaning. Well, when she's ready. I don't think she's ever ready, probably. Oh, boy. I think it's probably the people around her make that decision. Hey, listen, Mike. I'm glad you have such opinion. You know what? I'm glad you take this so lightly. I'm so glad that you wanted to go through because now I know exactly how to do it. Now I know. You know how I pray upon stupid bleeding hearts like you? Oh, let her go. Let her go. Okay. Now I know where to put the dynamite. The what? The dynamite. That was private.
And I was left outside and they came out and told me that it had something to do with her Depends, that it was wet and it was firm. Well, if they knew, what are they barking about? You know the deal. Yeah, don't worry about it. It's wet and that's why it's like that. So were they then going to examine the Depends? I mean... What are they going to do? Take a scalpel and open it up? Nope. No plastic explosives in here. Just pee. I mean, gosh, check it thoroughly. She would have to remove it. And I was I said, I don't have an extra one with me. Normally, this isn't a problem. And she said, don't have an extra one with you. What are you talking about? It's a miserable flight for that old lady. And everyone else on the plane. And everyone else on the plane. Absolutely. That's not fair for her to not have an extra one. That she could not complete the security check without the depends off. Okay, so here's the TSA's response. Quote, while every person and item must be screened before entering the secure boarding area, TSA works with passengers to resolve security alarms in a respectful and sensitive manner. We have reviewed the circumstances involving the screening and determined that our officers acted professionally and according to proper procedure. Oh, what a nightmare.
Today, I'll probably have to wear them, too. Oh, that's so awful. I have some in here for you. Jay rather likes them. Yeah. I wear them when I ride my bike. I never have to stop. When I climb. When I do the tour to Escondido. That's right. I don't have to stop. I just do my thing. I just do my business. Hey, so the Giants fan that got beat up at the L.A. Dodgers game in... Los Angeles, a sad story. Guy went into a coma. Yes. Now there's new news on the dude that beat him up. Yeah, the guy that beat him up is named Giovanni Ramirez. He's the main suspect in the beating. Brian Stowe is the gentleman that got beat up. And he is doing better, but still not great. He's breathing on his own. He's able to follow some basic commands. But the guy that beat him up, Giovanni Ramirez.
has been arrested he was arrested for this as a suspect they also found out that he had violated the parole that he was on so they are sending him to the richard j donovan correctional facility he's going to serve 10 months on parole violation before he goes to trial for this woods showed me a picture of the guy he's terrifying terrifying i said i would listen i'm not the kind of guy that lips off anyway but if i was i wouldn't lip off to that dude no especially if that dude had anybody with him Oh, man, he just looks scary. Got the teardrop going. Oh, yeah, he'll get you. He's going to Donovan. Yep. For 10 months. He's around here. Parole violation. So, you know, keep this guy in there as long as you can. And then hopefully they convict him on the beating case, too. And he's in there for a long time. This was, I don't know if you heard, Peter Falk died over the weekend. He's 83 years old. Here's his big line. Oh, sir. Just one more thing. Did you watch, I'm going to ask Jay. Because he's the only one that I can think of. Absolutely. You watch Columbo? Oh, all the time. Okay, so when he says just one more thing, was his whole bit like he would pretend that he didn't know anything? Yeah, he was the bumbling kind of, well, you know, let me figure this out. I don't know anything. Yeah, you tell me, you know, kind of thing. And they were always like condescending, like, oh, I'll tell you. Because they thought he was dumb. He thought he was dumb. Because they played dumb. But then he would do this thing where he would get them to think he was really dumb, and then he would. Oh, sir, just one more thing.
How exactly do you explain this? And then they'd be like... He had a glass eye. He did? Yeah, and the whole thing. That was Peter Falk. That was his whole thing. He had a glass eye. He was looking cross. Yeah. In real life? Oh, yeah. Yeah. And it really worked on, you know, that character because the character was like, yeah, I don't know anything, you know. Oh, I forget it, you know. Oh, but just one more thing, you creep. And then he'd pull out some piece of evidence, you know. Let's see. Here's another scene from Columbo. As Lieutenant Lucerne would say, where there is no proof, there is no criminal. Fascinating, notwithstanding. But I think, sir, I have the proof. Lieutenant, there are no fingerprints on that gun. You said so yourself this morning. Well, you're absolutely right again, sir. The killer cleaned the gun of all incriminating prints. But the thing is, he forgot something. Forgot what? Well, sir, you know that this gun was only used as a prop. So, of course, it was never filled with anything but blanks. That is, until you stole it, sir. And in order to kill Mrs. Daly, you had to remove the blanks and insert real bullets.
See, you thought I was a jackhole, didn't you? You thought I was a stupid jackhole. But the whole time I knew this was you, you dirty dirtbag. There were no prints on the gun because you wiped the gun clean, sir. Nah, old one-eye's not going to figure me out, is he? This guy's a dummy. It's what you thought. Look at this picture of you doing it. But there is a reason that the lab report took so long. You remembered. To clean the gun. But you didn't remember to do the same thing with the bullets. It's over. Forget it, dude. You're up the river. Well, Peter Falk died. I've never seen The Princess Bride, which is a big deal to a lot of people. I love that movie. It's a matter with you. What is a matter with you? I know. Everyone says it's great and it still plays. Fantasy Hobbit bit him out. He was in it. I don't remember it. But I didn't see it. I brought you a special present. What is it? Open it up. It's a bucket of heroin. A book? That's right. When I was your age, television was called books. And this is a special book. It was the book my father used to read to me when I was sick, and I used to read it to your father. Yeah, that's great. Tell me something else that bores the crap out of me. And today I'm going to read it to you. Is it going to have any sports in it? Hi, you.
Pitting, fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes. Megan Fox nude in it. True love, miracles. Doesn't sound too bad. No interest. It's good. Little Kevin Arnold. Casey Anthony trial over the weekend was really good. Well, it was good Friday. Started off Friday really good because they put her brother on the stand, who real clearly is now all about the defense. And the prosecution's good. The defense stinks. Yeah, they need some work. Guy's a bumbling dodo bird. Or is he? Or is he? Just one more thing. Yeah, Jose Baez, her attorney. I'll tell you about him in a second, but he screwed everything up. They had to let everybody go home on Saturday because of that dude. But anyway, the prosecution is pretty good. So the first thing they do when they talk to the brother is they want the whole jury to know that the brother is now working for the defense. But they can't just come out and say that. They can't go, hey, so you're all about the defense now, aren't you? They can't do that. So they have to do it through cleverness. So they go, is it true that you got a, is it true?
That we tried to contact you multiple times for interviews to participate with our, you know, prosecution. Yes, that's true. And did you contact us back? No, I did not. Okay. Is it also true that you had the opportunity to talk to Mr. Baez, the defense attorney? Well. Uh, I think, yeah. I mean, I did talk to him. Is it true that you actually reached out to him? Uh, yeah. Yes, I did. Was that last week? Uh, yes. No further questions. Okay, so they leave it at that. And then they just go through this process of, you know, the defense gets up. And the big thing on Friday was that her brother was crying, she was crying, and they were real tears. It wasn't fake tears.
They were both really crying. And the whole thing that they were crying over was why did you know about your sister's pregnancy when she was 18, when she got pregnant with Kaylee? Did you know about it? Turns out they only talked to him about it. And when I say they, I mean her family only talked to him about it one time. That was it. And then it didn't come up again until a few days before Kaylee was born. And he never went to visit in the hospital. Okay. And as they start to ask him, well, how come? He gets really emotional. He starts to cry. Now, there's all kinds of theories out there. Why was he so emotional? And, you know, of course, when they go to lunch, everybody's sort of speculating. Well, why was he crying? Why was she crying? Why were they both so upset? One of the things that came up was, well, if what Casey is saying is true and he molested her, maybe he thought it was his kid. And, you know, maybe that was it. Everybody's coming up with all these different reasons. Well, the prosecution, when they come back from lunch, they go right to the question. They're like, when we interviewed you during a deposition, we talked about her pregnancy and you didn't cry. And now you're crying. So what is it?
What's the difference between then and now that brought out such emotion from you? And he actually said something that made sense and blew me away. Because I'm thinking, all of these different reasons is why is he crying? Why is he crying? Why is he crying? His actual answer was pretty good. He said, at the time that I did the deposition, and he starts to get emotional again. He said, I believed that Kaylee was still alive. And since then, I have come to the belief that she is not. And so I guess I have some regrets that I didn't go to the hospital. Makes sense, doesn't it? Makes sense. He was being a big baby because his parents didn't tell him or didn't include him. And he says he didn't go to the hospital because they didn't want to include me. And, you know, it's a catch 22. He also.
had made it real clear that his parents tried to hide it. His parents tried to hide the pregnancy. And he really wants that to be out there. His parents tried to hide the pregnancy. His parents tried to hide the pregnancy. Prosecution gets up and says, if they tried to hide the pregnancy, why did they have a bunch of like, why were they making such a big deal out of it? And he says, they weren't making a big deal out of it. And he said, didn't they have her room decorated and Winnie the Pooh stuff? Could have been. I mean, well, no, didn't they? Don't you know for a fact that they did? Weren't they out and like really going over the top about it? Can you turn to page 35 of your deposition? It says here that you said that your parents were very over the top. Is that right? Can you? Is that right? Well, my parents are very over the top just in general. So I probably said that because they're just over the top in general. Didn't they have a didn't they have a baby shower for her? Yeah. Well, did you know about the baby shower? Because, I mean, you say that you don't think they were over the top. They didn't celebrate. They didn't do it. But there was a baby shower, I guess. I mean, I wasn't involved in any of that stuff. So, you know, I didn't really pay attention. Yeah, I know. But you knew about it, right? You lived in the house, didn't you? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I did, but I didn't really pay attention to that stuff. And then he would go.
And they go, well, it's just, it's hard. Help me understand. How did you not know or you weren't really aware of Winnie the Pooh stuff? You lived in the house. Where did you live in the house? Next door, the room next door. Okay, no further questions. Oh, yeah. One thing that's really clear is, is that they had a weird, weird relationship and the family was as dis... functional as it gets. Court was canceled on Saturday because Jose Baez forgot to give the prosecution one of his witnesses that he was going to present. And they were like, we don't even know who this is. What are you doing? Today's day 29. Oh, yeah. Yeah, just to show you how inexperienced this judge is, he told everybody that they'd be home by the 4th of July. There's a woman on the jury that she's going to be in London on the 27th. Oops.
Might be getting some new freeways here in San Diego. Southern California. We'll tell you what we're talking about. Is it going to affect you? We'll tell you next. Part of the Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949. Or text 949Mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Steer right! A curveball can get pitched when you least expect it. And not just in baseball. Are you prepared for a carbon monoxide leak in your home? A new state law requires most homeowners to install CO alarm. When it comes to home safety, Kitta has your bases covered. For more than 90 years, Kitta has provided quality safety products to help protect families from fires and carbon monoxide, which can be produced when fuel-burning appliances malfunction. You can't see, smell, or taste CO. Installing a carbon monoxide alarm is the only safe way to detect this poisonous gas.
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This report, it's brought to you by Allstate. The 4th of July holiday is one of the most dangerous on the road, so before you head out to celebrate, put yourself in good hands. Dollar for dollar, nobody protects you like Allstate. Looks like the 15 southbound before Felicita Road, there is a multi-vehicle crash. They have moved it over to the right shoulder, though. Some slowing here on the 163 northbound between the 8 and the 52. It's in the mid-30s, and you've got a little bit of fog as you head out the door, so you may have some reduced visibility. Also brought to you by Bullfrog, Bullfrog Sunblock, invented, tested, trusted by surfers. Try a new Bullfrog Water Armor Sport, the toughest waterproof protection under the sun. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I get nervous when I watch shows like The Real World. They make me nervous. Lauren. One of those things, no matter how many times someone tells me it's good, I'm not going to go see it. Woods. I'd vote for Ted Nugent over Donald Trump. Sienna. And I think that guys that drive big lifted trucks are, you know, overcompensating for something that is little. And Jay. I think that a kid should be able to be a kid. On FM 94.9. Sienna says, hang on a second with that freeway thing. Just hang on a minute. Word of the day is flashlight. And so I'll work that into a sentence sometime to 910. And when I do.
Caller number nine is going to get to go to the sold-out Jeff Bridges concert that's going on in Phoenix this weekend as he's doing his Bad Blake stuff. He's doing his Crazy Heart stuff. And he's got a new album coming out, so he's doing that, too. It's a country album, you know? If you've never seen Crazy Heart, you should. It's great. And anyway, that's what he's doing. You just have to get yourself to Phoenix and have a place to stay in Phoenix. But as long as you can do that, we will set you up with tickets to the sold-out show. Question. Yeah. Are you going to buy a t-shirt? Yes, if they have one. The problem is that it's going to say Jeff Bridges. I want it to say Bad Blake. I want a black shirt with white letters across like in a half moon that say Bad Blake. Triple X. Triple X. You guys better plan out who's going to get to wear their t-shirt first. I know. You don't want to wear it on the same day. We'll both wear it the same day. Well, if it ain't a Bad Blake shirt, I don't want it. I don't want a Jeff Bridges shirt. I want a Bad Blake. Me too. If they were smart, they'd sell a jillion of them. Oh, I know. But, you know, he's probably like, I'm not bad black. It was just a roll, you guys. I've had other rolls. I don't have Tron t-shirts either, okay? Come on, we want Tron t-shirts. Okay, so this is not about freeways. Yeah, every once in a while a headline will throw me off, but there's been a 12-year-long tagging study of fish and sharks, and apparently they need to make...
Two new freeways in the water. For maps. For maps, right. For the animals. They had it wrong. Migratory routes. Water freeways. Yes. But they will be near the San Diego coast. Yeah. You know the thing that's like a ski lift that goes over the fair? Yeah. The Sky Tram or whatever it is? Uh-huh. Jake loves it. Woodsy and his wife Jamie took him on it last year. And Jake loves it. So on Friday, you know, we... Me, Rebecca, and Jakey went on it. He's sitting in the middle. He's having a great time. She starts to have a panic attack. Rebecca. Your missus? Yeah. And I was trying so hard to calm her down. I was doing everything I could to calm her down. And she had to get off on the other side. We bought the round trip, you know, where you go back. But she had to get off on the other side. And I felt, I was like, man, it felt so. I wasn't manly enough to get my woman to relax. It was a macho thing. I wanted to be able to be a Rebecca Whisperer. And it wasn't working. A rock for her to know that she's going to make it because you're there. Because I'm there and I can talk her down. But she wasn't having it.
Panic attacks are crazy. It's very hard to calm someone. Yes. I've had them. So she got off at the halfway mark and walked back to meet you guys? Yes. Oh, man. Yeah. That thing's scary. It is. I don't like it. It's scary for me because I weigh so much, you know. And when we're on it, I keep thinking, you know. It's got to be a limit. Yeah. It's got to be a limit. This thing has got to, at some point, there's only so much that it can handle. It's got to give. And I hope that I'm not that guy. How was Jake when this was happening? He loves it. Well, she wasn't having it. I was the only one that could tell that she was having it. And, you know, I was trying to change the topic and talk about different things. I'm sure that wasn't helping. It wasn't. I was trying. But that was the way I was trying to help. You know, trying to get her mind off of it. Trying to be loving. But she knew what I was up to. She knows your bit. Yeah, she knows my bits. Real fun driving on the 5 on Friday. There's a lot of accidents. There was a fare traffic and all of it. Murder. Yeah, it was a nightmare. Hour and a half. On Saturday, it was worse. They shut down the Via de la Valle exit completely, and the freeway was just locked. Yeah, the lot filled up quickly. Oh, wow. Maybe they moved the fare to the desert. Seriously. And then people can go to the desert. There's got to be a better way. There has to. There's one exit for the fare. It's murder every day. We were walking out of there, and...
It was cloudy but hot, which is gross. When it's cloudy and hot, I'm walking. I feel like a swamp. We go underneath the bridge because we parked on the other side. Sorry, Rebecca parked on the other side. And in the dirt. And here comes the big water truck to spray the dirt down into mud so that you can walk on it. So you had a good time. Could they charge you to park right up at the front? What would you pay the most? Would you pay $50? It's $15. Would you pay $50? I think I would. To not park on the dirt. I think I would pay $50. Gosh darn it. I think I would. I can't lie. I know. I don't want to wait for the tram. I think I would drop a $50 bill to park right up front. That's insane. I know. It is. I parked in Solana Beach. It doesn't surprise me.
LLB with her healthy stuff. Oh, speaking of, she kicked off her Friday night with a documentary about yoga. Oh, my. Weird. Oh, my. What's that like? You know, even I was like, this is ridiculous. Now I'm just being ridiculous. But on Netflix, it was like, oh, people in your area have watched this. And so it was on there. And I was like, why not? They took the red box away. What's that? The little dispensary where you can get a dollar DVD. Took it away. Oh. And so how did you decide on this, Doc? I thought maybe it would inspire me. I knew I wanted to be healthy this weekend. There was no boozing. I was in bed before like, you know, 11 every night. And so I was like, maybe this will get me into the spirit of things. Sure. So it was. Oh, wow. What was it like?
It was surprisingly pretty good. Yeah. I did go to yoga on Saturday and Sunday, so I think it helps. Yoga. I've never done it, and I have no desire. Are you sure? Then she went running. Oh, boy. Swimming in the ocean. Oh, boy. Easy. Easy, Jay. I know. Farmer's Market on Sunday. Wow. Oh, that's probably part of where the sunburn came from. Man, I'll tell you. Did you do all this with your boyfriend, Matt Commerce? No, he's out of town. I'm more productive. This is what you do when, oh my gosh. If given to her own devices, this is what she's up to. Just out and running. Running and swimming. Girls are the opposite, I think. We're way more healthy when you guys are not around. Way more. Drag us down. You do. Yeah, we bring you down. You guys drag us down. No. Yes, you do. You guys are the proverbial ball and chain. Come on. Do we make brownies? No.
You guys make brownie. Do you guys want fast food? Yes. Fair enough. Touche. Touche. She bought a green drink that had kale. Oh, my God. Grapefruit. Stop. Apple. Collards. Chard. Wild spinach. Blue agave. Yerba mate. Yerba mate. Yerba mate. Yerba mate. Yerba mate. Anybody would have read it. Yerba mate. It's Australian. Yerba mate. And flax in it. What'd that taste like? Like a horse smells, right? I'll break it in. It tasted like a horse smells. It's delicious. The grapefruit is the base, so it cuts it. Filth. It's very good. It's very good. But I was wired all night. Couldn't fall asleep last night. Cuts it like a turd cuts through cheese, doesn't it? Disgusting. My goodness. Well, a turd doesn't really cut through cheese. Yuck. The yerba mate, I think, had me up, though. Of course it did. I couldn't fall asleep.
What a life. It's health life. It's a complete 180 from my diet and my activities. It's a complete 180. I have to turn things around. Oh, gosh. There's breaking news right now. M1 grunting baby from Carlsbad. Hey, what's up, Mikey? How are you guys doing? Hey, good. Dude, I've been... I try to listen to both of you guys, but I've been riveted. So basically, Judge Perry just... announced on, you know... Casey Anthony trial. Casey Anthony trial. Did you hear that Saturday he abruptly just totally said, okay, court's dismissed. Right. So, dude, I had my wife waking up at 5.30. We've been watching it. There was total speculation that she was going to plea because there was a death penalty lawyer next to her. Right. So the whole speculation was, oh my gosh, she's going to plead guilty. Right. So then they come out, get this, they... said she was incompetent. The defense came out and tried to say, our defendant is insane. So Judge Perry says, all right, I'll have three independent psychologists basically interview her. He just came back and said, your client's not insane. Let's keep going. Oh, my God. You know, you promised, Mikey, that if she, if it goes live and she gets on the stand.
that you'll go live, right? Yes. Go on the stand. Yes. Dude, let me tell you, if Casey Anthony goes on the stand, if she testifies, it will be the biggest trial thing of our century, of our lifetime. Since OJ. Bigger than OJ. Bigger than OJ. She'll testify. Bigger than OJ. I think it already is. You should have seen her. She was laughing. The people... I watched this. I don't know. Does your wife stream online or watch it online? Oh, yeah. Okay, it's called WT. It's not the Orlando Center. It stands for white trash. Uh-huh. Oh. But you watched that one and basically... She was laughing and giddy, and the people are like, why is she so happy? Yeah, she's trying to pretend she's insane. She's not. She's crazy, and she's not. So now they know. I love Perry because Perry's like, I'm sorry. That's the judge. Sorry, just Perry's like, you're not crazy. Keep going with the trial. It's amazing, guys. I'll try to listen to you guys on a beautiful day. All right, thank you, bro. Thank you, thank you. Defense just throwing stuff at the wall now. They're just throwing everything out there. The defendant is present, along with counsel for the defendant, assist the state attorney.
Both sides ready to proceed. Yes, sir. Here's her attorney. Here's Casey Anthony's attorney. Okay, on Saturday, the defense filed a motion to determine competency to proceed. Holy cow. Based upon that motion, the court ordered that the defendant to be examined by three psychologists. That is insane. So on. OK, so if you didn't know on Saturday, he sent everybody home. The judge sent everybody home. He says no court today. Now, I thought it was because he was pissed off at her attorney. Right. Because her attorney was. That's what the speculation brought a witness that he didn't give any of the prosecutors any of that witnesses information. That's what we thought he was mad about. Right. Well, it wasn't. It was that her attorneys brought him into a room and said, yes, judge, we'd like to let you know that our client's insane. We'd like to plead insanity now. They filed a motion. Filed a motion. Holy cow. So let's keep listening. To determine her competency to proceed, the court appointed three independent experts. The first expert the court appointed was Dr. Daniel Tresler. Dr. Tresler examined Ms. Anthony on late Saturday morning.
Saturday afternoon. Now, think about this. She's going in to talk to these three doctors. She has to convince them that she's cuckoo. Now, knowing her and knowing anybody that would be doing that, they're probably going to be like and saying a bunch of weird stuff, which the doctors can see through. They're like, please, would that really? No, I'm not Daffy Duck. The court also. Appointed Dr. Harry McLaren out of Quincy, Florida. Dr. McLaren examined Miss Anthony on Saturday evening. Also, Dr. Phil McCracken. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. He makes me want to eat a pudding pop. He does. He sounds like a little bit like Bill Cosby.
We also appointed Dr. Pepper. I'm just joking. Dr. Jimmy Crackone. I don't care. On Sunday, the court also appointed Dr. Ryan Hall. He sounds like a hottie. He does. Examine Ms. Anthony on Sunday. Both sides willing to stipulate that the court. It's stipulate. a judge may utilize the reports that were submitted by the doctors in making the determination on the issue of competency to proceed what says the state of florida the state will stipulate your honor and the defense no objections on that okay now has both sides had an opportunity to review the reports of the three uh she's mad by the way she's like i'm i am crazy but i'm crazy
experts in this area? Yes, the defense has. Based upon the reports that the court has reviewed, the court will find that the defendant is competent to continue to proceed. You're listening to the Casey Anthony trial where the judge just got hit up over the weekend with, hey, guess what? Casey's cuckoo. Okay. Let three doctors take a look at her. Nope, she's fine. Let's keep going. On the TV, it looks like she has horns. Yeah. It's her ears. No, right there on her forehead, like there's two little bumps starting to grow. There's a lot more makeup on today. Looks good. Oh, boy. Not bad. Those reports will be filed, but pursuant to law, those reports will remain under seal. The originals now will be filed with the clerk of the court. Let's get it on. Wow.
I can see why the trial is taking longer than they expected. Yeah. Move it along. I'd be like, come on, dude. Say it. Say it. Marble mouth. Go ahead. Say it. What? Say it. Say it. Say it. Say it. It shouldn't take seven seconds to say doctor. No. Doctor. Say it. Judge. Your honor. Respectfully. Spit it out. Doctor. Say it. So there you go. Let's see. Thank you, sir. I don't watch this show. I have no interest in this show. The only reason I'm playing this clip to you is because there was a controversy about Kim Kardashian and her butt. There's something like online. It says Kim's butt deflated like her butt implants. I have no idea. It's so ridiculous. She says she doesn't have butt implants. Yeah. I mean, people ask. I talked to Kim Kardashian on a telephone interview and I only I've still have never seen the.
television show so i had to ask her what she does what she is famous for and i thought she was nice she told me i'm famous because i have my own line of clothing i have a perfume line and uh uh i am a socialite sex tape too yeah she did not she did not mention the sex tape oh that's weird weird All the time if my butt is real. Like some websites say I have like butt implants and then some say I have like butt pads and this. They play this obnoxious rave music in the background while you watch the show? No, I watched the show yesterday, weird, and that was not on. It's been going on for years and it is so ridiculous. Everyone has a butt. Like some are bigger, some are smaller. Like I don't, I just don't understand. Don't pretend that you don't understand the fascination with your butt. Please. Come on. That's not fair to us. Freakish. It's a big derriere. It's a big butt. She's making me want it. She has a big butt. Well, she did get the x-ray, and she compared it to her sister's breast implant to show this is an implant. Oh, good. This is my real butt. Good. Good. Oh, good. All good. Everybody, is everybody good? Yeah. I can sleep tonight, I think. Are you good, Mike? No, they're saying it's not a real x-ray of hers. Like, how can you prove it was actually hers? Jay, how do you know this? Do you watch that show?
I just know ridiculous stuff. He does. They're not saying that. They are saying that. They're saying, how can you be sure that that is her x-ray of her butt? I want to watch Jay squinting at the TV and watching it. Alone in a dark room. Kim, fix me a sandwich. Is that that Kardashian girl? I can't believe it's Kim Kardashian. Will you cut me off some meat? Where's my lotion? Oh, my God. My hands are dry. They're just dry. That's too far, Jay. Read between the lines, y'all. I think anyone can. No, most people couldn't figure out what I meant. Helen Keller's like... He's very subtle. Y'all get it? Y'all get it? Y'all get my dirty joke? Should I say more like, get me some tissues? Should I keep going? No, Jay, no. No, what you said.
What? More than enough. What if I... No. Nope. No more needed. How about... No. Wait, wait. No, no, no, no. But Mike. No. Okay, okay, okay. Okay, we get it. We got it. Hey, Mike. No. Holy smoke. What if I fit? No, no. Sure everyone got it? Can I do... My gosh. What, Mike? Wiener time. Oh, my. It hurts. It really hurts. Let's see. So we're going to give you the top five men killers. Things that are top five things that kill us guys. Yeah. And what else? Oh, I want you to think about this too. Who's the perfect? Okay. Barring taking only appearance into account. I'm asking you to take only appearance into account. Who's the perfect woman? If you only take appearance. I don't want to hear.
And what I mean by that is we've talked about like the perfect food. So this woman that you call and you say, I think this is a perfect woman. What we're talking about is appearance. Like what makes you think that her appearance does not have flaw? Okay? 570-1949. And I want you to try, if you can, to punish your brain into not... going with their personality and adding the personality into it. Because if you did that, you would have to exclude Lindsay Lohan or Paris Hilton. Casey Anthony. Casey Anthony. Now, you have to punish your brain in order to be able to get to a place where you go, okay, I want to have an intelligent conversation about a woman that I believe is so gorgeous she does not have flaw. That's not the easiest thing to do, but that's what I'm asking you to do. 570-1949 or text it and explain yourself. A woman without fly? It's different too if you ask men or women because I'm going to be interested to get a take from LOB and Sienna. Guaranteed it's some girl that's got like, you know, they're going to say, they're going to go, yeah, Elizabeth Smart.
I think that she is flawless. She's gorgeous without flaw. I have the women's number one. I know it. Me too. I think I know one too. Should we save it? Let's save it. I'll save it. I've got one. I love this guy. More from the Mikey Show coming up in a respectful and sober manner. Be a part of the show. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949-MIKEY. At gmail.com. Oh, go, go. This is The Mikey Show. You're welcome. On FM 94.9. At Vons, we believe the standards you live by should be the ones you eat by. Honesty, integrity, and real. That's why we developed Open Nature, a new line of 100% natural foods you can only get at Vons. No added hormones, no antibiotics, no artificial ingredients. So they meet the highest standards of all, yours. You'll find naturally delicious open-natured chicken and sausage, yogurt and cereal.
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Services prices and hours vary by location. See center for details. The UPS Store is offering three months free mailbox services with an annual agreement and a real street address at participating locations. New box holders only. Visit the upsstore.com. Notary also available. There is a new celebration inspired by a world far, far away. Wild creatures, both real and imaginary, will be honored. Ancient arts, both magical and daring, will be performed. It's called The China Celebration. San Diego Zoo. Come witness kung fu without getting into kung fu fight. Taste authentic Chinese food without waiting for delivery. Meet real Chinese animals born and raised in America. Purchase souvenirs actually made in China. Honor monkeys in Year of the Rabbit. And lots of poo-poo. No platters. Only at The China Celebration. Celebrate the wonders of the Far East at The San Diego Zoo's China Celebration. From jaw-dropping acrobatics to wild animal encounters, it's sure to be a magical evening for all. Open nightly June 25th through September 5th. Visit sandiegozoo.org for details. And the fun doesn't have to stop when you leave the zoo. Stay connected to the animals with games and videos on our new kids' site at sandiegozoo.org. Explore today. Life's better with baseball. And the 2011 season rolls on with more than 145 live Padre games exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego. And then... Padres win!
Join John Weisbarth, Jenny Kavnar, and me, Bob Scanlon, for the Sequoia Casino postgame show. And as always, be sure to like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter all season long. The Padres begin their series with Kansas City, 6.30 Monday. From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse, go behind the headlines and sports pages and get to know the real people who don the Padres uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego. There's a rumor that San Diego is home to one of the most brilliant, insightful, and educational culinary TV shows ever created. And then there's my show.
but it's big in taste and small in effort. Sam the Cooking Guy, Sundays at 5.30 and 7 p.m., only on Channel 4, San Diego. ProPhil Institute for Clinical Research hopes to make a difference in the lives of future generations of diabetics by taking part in research on possible future diabetes medications. Currently, ProPhil Institute is conducting a clinical research study evaluating an investigational oral medication in people with type 1 diabetes. If you've been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and are between the ages of 18 to 50 years old, consider participating in this clinical research study. This study is not intended to treat your condition. You may be compensated up to $3,482.25 for your time and travel. Up to eight overnights and eight outpatient visits may be required. For more information, contact Profil Institute at 1-866-245-0373 or check out Profil's website at profilinstitute.com. Once again, call 1-866-245-0373 for more information on participating in a clinical research study with Profil Institute. That number is 1-866-245-0373 or email Profil at volunteer at ProfilInstitute.com. Reach 300,000 miles with eligible Quaker State motor oils and they'll give you the trade-in value of your car in cash. Details at QuakerState.com. This report, it's brought to you by Subway Restaurants. Congratulations to all you San Diego grads from your friends at Subway Restaurants. Call or come by your local Subway restaurant today. Place your order. Subway, eat fresh.
Well, we've got some fog, so be careful as you head out the door this morning. The 15 in both directions, good news here, between the 56 and the 163 has been reopened. Three-car crash, though, in Escondido on the 15 southbound before Felicita Road. They do have that moved over to the right shoulder. But you're going to find some delays as you travel through Escondido on the 15 southbound between El Norte Parkway, Center City Parkway. This report also brought to you by the Mini Cooper Hard Topic. It's 37 miles per gallon. That's 37 commute changing, rarely having to fill your tank miles per gallon. Visit miniofsdcounty.com for details. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego, a Lincoln Financial radio station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. If it isn't in high definition, I don't. I don't even want to see it. Lauren. So I'm cheap, and I went to YouTube instead of iTunes just to be able to listen to it. Woods. Without my mom and my wife, I'm a kite without a string, my friend. Sienna. I wish cat's tails would go down and not up. And Jay. I would rather dance and play baseball. On FM 94.9. I love Woods' 70s airbase. So we got a text, and we're going to be giving these, the top five things that are.
Or men killers, what gets us. Heart attack, I'm sure, is that kind of stuff. I would really like to talk to this woman. Somebody texted us and said, Kim Kardashian doesn't have butt implants, but she has butt shots. I know because I got them too. What is that? Call us and tell us. 570-1949. And then the topic that we're talking about is, barring personality, you can only take looks into account. What's the perfect... Girl, she's flawless. Appearance-wise. And make your argument. 570-194-9. Sienna, what's going on in the news? Well, if you didn't know, Saturday marked the second anniversary of the death of Michael Jackson. Now, there was no actual event planned. However, hundreds of fans went to Neverland Ranch to commemorate the anniversary of his death. And even the Cardiff Cooke was dressed up as MJ. Yeah, it was. Also some good news. Maybe you like me more. I love you. Yeah, you do.
Some good news. Gas prices have fallen an average of 11 cents in the past two weeks. Right now, the average price of self-serve regular gas is $3.62 a gallon. And prices could even be falling more now that Obama and some other leaders have ordered to release some crude oil from government oil reserves. Wow. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, sports is brought to us today by our friends at Frank's Red Hot. Frank's Red Hot. Yeah. Hey, listen, the Padres actually played some pretty good baseball at home this week, and they took two of three from the Braves. They won yesterday 4-1. They had a nice little comeback in the eighth inning off one of the best pitchers in the game, Johnny Ventners. And, dude, they're playing a little bit better baseball. I think maybe it's their heads right now. Took two out of three from the Red Sox. Thank you very much. And two of three from the Braves. It's awesome, man. And then they're welcoming in the Royals, who... They're another team that's very beatable. Game time tonight is 7.05 p.m. It's a three-game set. And tonight is Jeff Francis against Matt Latos. There you go. All right. All right. So we'll be talking about the top five men killers in a minute. But first, the perfect woman, taking only appearance into account. We got a text that I can't disagree with. The guy says, Barbara Eaton, you joking? He says, classic beauty. I'm one hit dog. I can't disagree with that. What's the flaw?
On Barbara Eden. 40 years ago, yeah. Well, yeah, that's what we're not talking about now. We're not talking about today her 98-year-old. I am. But is there a flaw with Jeannie? No. No. In fact, that's great. That is a real good one. 570-1949. I can't wait to hear what L.O.B. and Sienna have to say about this because chicks always have a different thought. Yes. M1. Marie from San Diego has mine. Go ahead. Scarlett Johansson. Yes. There's nothing wrong. Nope. Nothing wrong with her. Wait, L.O.B. just went and put her hands... A little teapot, short and stout. In the most sexy... In the most delightful way. Yeah. Well, and that's what's sexy about her. She's not super thin. She's not super tall. She's small. She's short, but she's voluptuous. Yes. I think she's gorgeous. I do, too. I cannot find flow. And beautiful without makeup. I think her body is gorgeous. Not really. You don't think the grill? No. Oh, wow. I disagree with that. Woods? Brooklyn Decker. She's my number one. Fight him on that, Sienna, because you don't agree. I think she's a really pretty girl. I think her body, there's way better bodies out there. Tell people what she was in, Woods. Well, she's been in a bunch. She's a model.
SI swimsuit model, cover girl. She was in that lame Adam Sandler movie. Just go with it. Just go with it. She is perfect. She's pretty stunning. Yeah. I think that there's an argument to be made for Carrie Underwood. Think of the made-up, beautiful Carrie Underwood. Where's the flaw? Small boobs, I think. I don't think she does. Well, maybe she does. Yeah, I don't know. I wouldn't know. She has the best legs. I know that. She's beautiful. Nice. Nice legs. I do not know what's happening with her chest, nor am I interested in that. Not very much is happening. Not much is going on. Really? Nothing wrong with that. I know a little bit. Shouldn't change that. No, shouldn't change that. Should not change that. Unless you want to. No, Woods feels you should definitely change it. No, no. Unless it's something that you want. I'm not going to tell you one way or the other. Aren't you? To me, it just looks like dollar symbols stamped on somebody's chest. stupid to me. It looks so foolish. If you can tell, I do worry about it. It's on night and day. It's all I can think about. You don't worry about it. M1, Laura from Carlsbad. Yeah. Who do you think it is? Megan Fox. Somebody says that the tip of her thumb bends at a 45 degree angle. It does. It's like a no thumb. What do you mean BS?
You can't find anything wrong with her. So someone was like, yeah, look at her thumbs. Look at her thumbs. Who cares about her thumbs? She's got carpal tunnel thumbs. Oh, my gosh. I did hear that her thumbs look like a toe. I saw her thumbs. You have to really, really be looking for something to be wrong with them. She even had a thumb double in a commercial. Oh, wow. A bath commercial. She was in a bathtub. M1 Derek from Mira Mesa. From Miramar. How about Catherine Zeta-Jones? Couldn't disagree with you more. Gorgeous. What? Yeah, gorgeous. I mean. Gorgeous. Gorgeous face. The flaw with Catherine Zeta-Jones is that she's always got that hair pulled back, and it makes her face look very wide. Right. Very tight. Very tight face. Tight face. She's got tight face. She's got tight face. Yeah, she's got tight face. She does have tight face. Bad case of it, too. I know exactly what you mean. You know what I mean? She has tight face. Yeah. M1 all caps from IB. Hey, I actually got two. One's Lana and the other one's Burnett. Charlize Theron and Sophie Chanel. Sophie Chanel. Charlize Theron, immediate disqualification because of Eileen Wuornos. Oh, stop. I could never date her. If I went in to kiss her, that's all I'd see is her being like, hey, let's go. Anybody that can make themselves look that much like Eileen Wuornos, it's virtually impossible to qualify.
What? You said image-wise, right? Why? That's what I'm talking about. I'm talking about just looks. Yeah. Yeah, that's it. She was able to make herself look like Eileen Wuornos. Did you see Scarlett Johansson in Lost in Translation? Yes. Angel. Oh, yeah. Thank you, L.O.B. Angel. L.O.B. helping me out a little bit. Thank you. Wow. High five for that. Yeah. McGump. 570-1949. Okay. Sienna, who's flawless? Well, there's always been one girl that I'm like, if I could look like anyone, I would want to look like her. And it's a Victoria's Secret model. And her name is Adriana Lina. Oh, my God. You know who that is? I knew you wouldn't know, Mike. So I brought up a picture and I didn't get like a sexy picture. It's her in a T-shirt. Gorgeous. Oh, my God. She's... Breathtaking. Perfect body. She's a mom. She still looks amazing. Gorgeous hair, the eyes. You can't have issues with her. Show me and I'll tell you what my issues are. You want me to find more pictures? Yeah, because that one's not doing it for me. I'll find a lingerie. She has buck teeth. I'm sorry. You're completely wrong.
Billions of men would disagree. Helena Christensen. Here's another one, but I'm going to find you one with the teeth. Oh my God, look at those eyes. Her eyes are bright aqua. She looks like the undead. In that photograph, she looks like she just got bit by Twilight. You're certifiable. She's gorgeous. Looks like she just got bit by Twilight. Who's her man? She's the best. An older guy, not that hot. Woody Allen. M1, Jackie from Ramona. Good morning, good morning. Good morning. Why is it all chicks calling in? Where's the bros? Dude, come on, guys. Isn't it guys calling in? Yeah, they're hiding in the car. Yeah, they're hiding because their wife is driving next to them. Guys, this is not saying that you're lusting over these women. All I'm saying is that you think these women are gorgeous. You think they're flawless. Go ahead. Oh, are you ready? Yep. If we're allowed to go back 40 years, Elizabeth Taylor. Oh, yeah. She was really hot. She was really beautiful. Voluptuous.
When she was four, they said they wondered her in the movies because her eyes were violet. Yes. Wow. Yes. She was beautiful. Thank you. I think there's an argument to be made for Audrey Hepburn. She was... Think of Breakfast at Tiffany's. Think of that woman. Yeah, very pretty. Very pretty. Gorgeous. She's gorgeous. Who is this? Farrah Fawcett was flawless back in the day. She was. Flawless. M1 Sand? Yeah, how's it going, fellas? Good. Who's yours? Claire Sinclair. Who's that? She was the playmate of the year. Of course she was. I'll have to check. I'll check her out. Yeah, I'll check that out. It's no big deal. Blonde or brunette? You know, I think she's a redhead. You don't know? I can't remember, but it was a couple of issues back. I think she's a redhead. Okay. And one AK from Point Loma. Halle Berry. I'll tell you my problem.
Her hair is too short. No offense to any short-haired women, but... Sorry. This weekend, my husband said she was, quote, delicious. Oh, wow. I was like, but really? I think she would be more delicious if her hair wasn't so pixie short. I don't know. But she can change that. She pulls it off. I'm not down. Gotta mix it up. Oh, my gosh. You have to mix it up. Here's Claire Sinclair. She's a pretty girl. It's a pointy chin. You guys! Her chin is so pointy at all. Don't move the thing. I'm going to tell you what my problem is. She looks like somebody's cousin Rosa. Yeah. Your cousin Rosa has got a pointy friggin' chin. Yeah, and she shows up to the family reunion barbecue. Yep. And she's always going to the bathroom with her purse. I don't know what that means. I need her to open my beer and she just used her chin.
You guys are insane. It's way poignant. Oh, my. Oh, boy, Harold, I could not disagree with you more. Sorry, buddy. Harold from San Marcos. Sorry, dude. Sorry. Christy Brinkley. Oh, no. Dude, she was pretty rad back in the day. Everybody thought so. Vacation? I didn't. No. When she's at the pool and vacation, flawless. Flawless. Flawless. Yeah, flawless. There's no flaws. She's in her bra and panties. She's amazing. It's a good question. What is the problem? Because on the surface, everybody go, Christy Brinkley. She, when she was 25 years old, looked like a 45-year-old soccer mom. A good-looking 45-year-old soccer mom. And I always saw that. Even when she was 25, she looked like a good-looking, like the... Best looking mom. She had old face. Yeah, she had old face. That's what it was. She had old face. She had old face. Cute guy. She always looked a little kooky when you looked her in the eyes. Always like there was some weird glint. You guys are nuts. This is honest cap time. I got one. I got one that's going to get you. Phoebe Cates. Flawless. Freaking flawless. Some would say she was too baby faced. Not me. She didn't look like an adult. Not me. She's cute. L.O.B. Who do you think is flawless?
I would say Megan Fox or Heidi Klum, but Heidi Klum like maybe 10 years ago. She's still smoking hot. Is that Seals Broad? Yeah, and to me she looks like Gray Slick, only a white girl. I don't know who that is. Hardcore. That's a bold statement. I'm not that into Gray Slick, and I'm not that into Heidi Klum. Nobody's into Gray Slick. Who's Gray Slick? She's from Jefferson Starship. She's from a different generation. She knows nothing like Grace. No, it's not Grace Slick. It's David Bowie's... Grace Jones. Who's David Bowie's ex? Iman. Yeah. No, I know who you're thinking about. It was Grace... Grace Jones. Grace Jones. She's a singer. Yeah, yeah. Is it Grace Jones? Grace Jones. I don't know. We're getting some zingers here, man. M1 Ed from San Diego. Go ahead, Ed. Oh, the person I would have to say is Nola Javokovic, Angela Jolie. And Natalie Portman. What about Angelina Jolie? Or Mila Jovovich? Mila Jovovich. Mila Jovovich. Mila Jovovich. I don't know who that is. Messed up teeth. Yeah, jacked up teeth. Farty. What about Mila Kunis? Mila Kunis. No. Bug eyes. What? Bug eyes. Her eyes are her best 12-year-old. I've seen her topless, too, and it's pretty gross. Oh, my. Pepperoni. Maybe you sent me that picture. Big nips. Dude.
What? I'm telling you. I know. I've seen it. It's in a movie. What movie is it? Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I'm going to look at that. Spike disagrees with you. I know they do. The entire network. I don't know who this is, but there's two people on the line saying the same person. M1 Wide Right Turns from Vista. Are you there? Yeah. You're saying the same thing as 50 Love. Who is this? Wait, what? The person that you're thinking of. Sophia Verjara. Oh, from Modern Family? Yeah. Oh, yeah. The voice gets me, though. Got that exotic look? Oh, damn. The voice gets me. But you're just looking at her. You're not supposed to be listening to her. She's a natural blonde, and they made her dye her hair to look more exotic. Is that right? She's very pretty. Very pretty girl. Wow, I'd like to see her in blonde. I'd like to peer through her window with a flashlight. I'd like to see her with a cap. Her hallets. I'd like to see her with foil in her hair. How beautiful I see you. I see you. Why you got that foyer in your hair? How'd you get that foyer? Who put that foyer in your hair? I'll take that foyer out. Your foil? Your foy? Who put the foyer in your hair? I'll give you some highlights. Just crawl.
I felt like I had snails all over me. There's a leech on my neck right now. My bottom lip. All right, Sienna, what is the top five men killers? Okay, I'll start with number five, and it is a stroke. Nearly 50,000 men in America die of a stroke. Perfect. Numero cuatro. Mikey, that's number four. That's four. Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease. What is that? Your lungs? It's just a heart attack. Yeah, a lot of guys, 60,000 men die from this. It's a heart attack. It includes chronic bronchitis and emphysema. It's your lungs, pulmonary. Number three is just accidents. You know, falls, fires, sports injuries, and 80,000 men die each year from unexpected tragedies. Cancer, of course, number two, nearly 300,000 men. And number one, heart disease. More than one in three adult men have some sort of heart disease. I believe that cancer is caused by everything. Yep. Pretty much. Like, I don't think there's, I don't know, name something. I'll tell you it probably does. You can name just about anything else. Drinking soda. Yeah, cancer. Sticker. Saccharin. Sticker's probably got something in it with cancers. Staples. Staples probably made with something that gives you cancer. Yep. Makeup.
Oh, for sure. Like, you could say organic baby kisses, and I'd be like, probably cancer. Cancer is just cancer in there. Carcinogens. Baby kisses. Probably, yeah. Carcinogenic. Diapers. Yeah, diapers, of course. Filled with cancer. Yeah. Side glasses. Yes. Oh, big time. Look, Prince Harry's hair. Cancer. Cancer, yeah. No doubt about it. You look at that, you're going to get cancer. Anything that red. Anything that Lucille Ball-ish. It's got the red eyelashes. Forget it. It's hideous. Gay marriage was legalized in New York. Yeah. Over the weekend. Was it over the weekend or when was it? Yeah, on Friday. And hundreds of thousands of people were in New York City for their Gay Pride Day. This is Governor Andrew Cuomo. This state, when it is at its finest, is a beacon for social justice. The legacy of this state.
was that we were the progressive capital of the nation. And what this state said today brings this discussion of marriage equality to a new plane. That's the power and the beauty of New York. The other states look to New York for the progressive direction. And what we said today is you look to New York once again. Because New York made a powerful statement, not just for the people of New York. but the people all across this nation. We reached a new level of social justice this evening. And then this. I'm always proud to be a New Yorker. But tonight... I don't necessarily swing that way. But, you know, that doesn't mean that I don't, you know, feel for the gays. And, you know... Want for them to have their rights and all. Now, let me make it clear. I like, you know, girls. By the way, you can follow me on Twitter. Governor Cuomo. It's actually the at symbol and then Governor Cuomo. I am especially proud to be a New Yorker.
New York State is the sixth state and by far the largest to permit gays to marry. And also, just so you know, same-sex couples can apply for a marriage license by July 5th. More than likely. Get it started. What a fabulous idea! There you go. Doogie Howser's getting married. Oh, he's real. He's super into it. Very. He's really, really into it. Doogie. He's really into Doogie. He and his boyfriend, David Bertka. They're engaged now because of this. You saw him on TV, right, Woodsy? Saw him on Yahoo News. He was very excited. That's probably more than we needed. He was very excited. He said that they'd been wearing rings forever, and they were just waiting. That's a fake bit. But there's five other states where they could go. They could go. Why don't you go? They could go somewhere else. Why do you have to wait for New York? I guess maybe they live in New York?
Plus, that's a fake bit, dude. You can't do that. Like, I can't. If you're dating a girl, you can't just stick on rings and be like, hey, we're married. Well, no, no, no. They've been wearing engagement rings forever. They've been engaged for a while. They've been waiting to get married. Now, when they get married, will there be like an extra band on there? Maybe they'll do a double band. Double band it? Yeah, maybe they'll double band it. Or new ones. Or new. Nude. Engrave it. Perverts. And you can technically just put on rings. I mean, it's common law. After a little bit, you're just married. Well, not in the gay community. If you tell people you're married. Well, no, not yet. Right. Should be. Somebody should debate them and be like, well, what's in a piece of paper? Why do you have to have a piece of paper? That's the old straight guy that never wants to get married. That's the straight guy that doesn't want to get married. Give him the same bit. You stick that guy on him. Don't get married. Just a piece of paper. It's a piece of paper. All you're going to do is argue. Crumple it up. She's going to change, man, when you put that ring on. Trust me. Hey, listen. Hey, Dougie. He's going to change. Let me tell you something. He'll change. Hey, Doug. Let me tell you something. All right? If you think that you married him, and when you married him, all of a sudden he was going to stop leaving his clothes all over the floor. You're wrong. You're wrong.
Doogie, when you get married to him, here's what it's going to sound like. Hey, take out the frigging garbage. Yeah. Pick your clothes up. Put your dishes in the sink. Hey, Doogie, listen to me. You're going to get the phone call. Where are you already? When are you coming home today? All the time with the questions. You working again? You working late? Oh, who's working late again, huh? Guess our anniversary means nothing to you. Get used to it when you marry your boyfriend. It's going to break your balls, all right? Constantly. Oh, yeah. It's going to be marriage bliss. You're wrong. You're wrong. Trust me. You've been married 15 years. M1 Kinderbutt from San Diego. What was the word of the day? The word of the day was splash noise. That is correct. You need to go see Jack Bridges in concert in Phoenix. You just got to get yourself there and have a place to stay. Hang on the lines. We're going to play Why Are We Here? We're going to pull two Mikey Show characters from a basket. And then we're going to come up with a location of where they are. And we have to figure out why are they here. And we'll do the voices. It's great. Show coming up in minutes. If you quit, it's going to follow you for the rest of your life. So be a part of the Mikey Show now.
Hey, Rip Van Byen. Shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. And? Call 570-1949. What a wonderful day it is for him. What a wonderful day it is for all of us. This is The Mikey Show. The little mushroom people of Nova Scotia screaming with horror. On FM 94.9. Now, during Toyota's July 4th Spectacular, it's great savings, great selection, and a great time to buy. Get 0% financing for 60 months on the new 2011 Camry. That's right. Save thousands with zero APR on a new Camry with its 33 MPG. See your San Diego County Toyota dealer. We've got it, we've got it, we've got 42. Toyota's July 4th Spectacular is going on now. And there's never been a better time to buy a new Toyota. Hurry in for zero APR on a new Camry. 2011 EPA estimates. Actual mileage will vary. Vehicles must be purchased from new car dealer stock by midnight, 7-5-11. Excludes hybrid, limited-term financing through Toyota Financial Services to qualify Tier 1 plus through Tier 3 credit customers only. Zero APR includes 60 monthly payments of $16.67 per $1,000 borrowed. For example, 10% down. Down payment varies with credit. Hey, gang. It's your OPW. That's your old pal, Woodsy.
Happy Monday, everybody. Listen, make your Monday right. Stop by Denny's for the Tour of America. It's a new limited-time menu. It's offered until August 29th. And they have six new celebrated dishes from the Midwestern and Southern states, as well as Philly, California, and Hawaii. Feast on all of it. You will not be disappointed. There's a new Midwestern meat and potato sandwich, Philly cheesesteak omelet, Hawaiian tropical pancakes, Georgia peach French toast, which sounds amazing. the new Southern Shrimp and Grits, and then they have three new drinks for you to try, too, the Florida Orange Milkshake, the Pacific Northwest Iced Coffee from Seattle, and the Hawaiian Tropical Smoothie. It's perfect for any Tommy Bahama fan out there, like my friend Mike. So stop by Denny's Tour of America. It's available all day, every day, for a limited time only, with dishes starting at $4.99. It is Denny's Tour of America. It can strike at any time, and you can't see, smell, or taste it. It's carbon monoxide. A gas that can poison you if fuel-burning appliances in your home malfunction. Furnaces, water heaters, gas grills, and generators are all potential sources. CO poisoning can happen anytime, anywhere, to anyone. But prevention is quick and easy. Install a Kitta carbon monoxide alarm. A new California law requires CO alarms in most homes. It's the only safe way to detect this invisible threat.
Head to the Home Depot where you'll find a Kitta CO alarm to meet your family's needs. Kitta has been helping to protect families for more than 90 years. Each Kitta CO alarm contains the world's most accurate CO sensing technology and all models last seven years. That's two more years of protection, saving you time, money, and possibly a loved one. Protect your family today with a Kitta CO alarm from the Home Depot. So I'm at the theater with my mom and sister. who somehow convinced me to see the latest Victorian romantic love tragedy film. But at least I have an ice-cold Coke. Well, I had an ice-cold Coke. Now I'm down to that last part where if I try to drink it, there's a good chance it'll make a slurping noise. Quiet. So I'm waiting for an action scene to cover the slurp. And waiting for the action scene. And waiting. To die for love? What could be more glory?
Family meal time is a lot like summer. It never lasts long enough. So keep your family at the table a little longer by preparing a great summer meal. And don't forget to stop by your local Stater Brothers and pick up lots of refreshing ice-cold Coca-Cola. Summer's over before you know it, but there's still plenty of time to gather around the table with ice-cold Coke. Coca-Cola, open happiness. Coca-Cola, open happiness. Hi, I'm Darla. I'm a Fresh and Easy Neighborhood Market customer. This message is by a real customer, not a celebrity. Saving money we pass on to you. I've always told people about Fresh and Easy. I tell them all the fresh stuff I get. I'll come in here and I'll see something else. Mmm, that looks interesting. Let me try it. As my husband said, I'm the guinea pig. I've never had a Fresh and Easy product that I didn't like. Thanks, Fresh and Easy. Thanks, Darla. Now we can offer a low price on California-grown grapes. Picked at the peak of freshness for just 99 cents per pound in various size packs. Hey, Carrie, a bunch of us are going out for dinner and a movie. Want to come? I can't. I'm being hassled because I'm behind on my bills since I got laid off. What should I do? When that happened to me, you know what I did? I called the Clinger Law Center and filed for bankruptcy. They put me completely at ease and stopped creditors from harassing me. The Clinger Law Center, huh? You wouldn't still have their number, would you? Yeah, 619-516-1601. 619-516-1601.
I'm going to call them right now. KLC is a debt relief agency under the U.S. Bankruptcy Code. Don't just aim for the top. Start there. Business Week ranks the University of San Diego's Evening MBA program as one of the top 30 in the nation and gives our faculty an A-plus for teaching quality. I'm Casey Hayes, Director of MBA Admissions at the University of San Diego. If you're looking to advance your career with an MBA from a program that's highly ranked for student satisfaction and academic quality, Visit us at sandiego.edu slash MBA. Don't just aim for the top. Start there. Did you know that you can help protect your child from preventable illnesses such as the flu and whooping cough? Getting vaccinated protects them from these and other illnesses and helps stop the spread of illnesses in your community. It's now mandatory for all 7th through 12th graders to get vaccinated against whooping cough. Call your doctor to learn if your child's vaccines are up to date or visit www.vaccinatela.com. Stay healthy. Vaccinate. This message is brought to you by the L.A. County Department of Public Health.
Hear the Authentic Surf Report daily at 7.30 a.m., 2.15 p.m., and 8.15 p.m. on FM 94.9. Supported by Frost Brewed Coors Light, the world's most refreshing beer. This report, it's brought to you by Burger King this weekend. Burger King is celebrating the 4th of July with the original chicken sandwich for just $1.04. True American original, $1.04. Starting July 2nd at Burger King. 94 westbound before Euclid Avenue. We've got tire debris in the middle of lanes. Also a three-car crash here in Escondido tying things up. This is on the 15 southbound before Felicita Road. They have moved it over to the right shoulder. And as you travel on the 52 westbound between Mission Gorge Road and Santo Road, we're slowing. 30 miles an hour. This report brought to you by Caltrans. In highway work zones, you've got two choices. Slow down or you can pay up. Fines are now up to $1,000 or more. Plus, you also get those points on your driving record. Slow for the Cone Zone. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. With the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Monday morning, of course, brought to you by Frostbrood Coors Light.
The world's most refreshing beer, Coors Brewing Company, Golden, Colorado. And today we're looking at a smaller, but still fairly steady combination of south-westerly swell out in the water. That is the dominant direction, secondary west-northwest out there, though, breaking that up. Giving us more crossed-up peaky surf at the beach breaks right now, which isn't a bad thing. Running in that knee-waist, chest-high zone, some pluses on that on occasion. The top south-facing areas, primarily, again, in the far north county, can still see some head-high waves. Other areas, waist, chest, or shoulder-high. on occasion. Overcast skies will greet you, light and variable winds, not really affecting surface textures. Moderately high tide this morning, really not much to spoil anywhere. Looks to be a fun day for the beaches right now, and those top south-facing areas should have waves that will remain routable throughout the day. Looks like we could have some early clearing, much like yesterday, and a nice sunny day ahead of us. Good thing. We're up to the minute surf reports forecast. Go to surpline.com, and again, this surf report is brought to you by Frostbrood Coors Light. and it can only be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm as feminine around my guy friends as I am around my wife. Lauren. My voice is always sweet. Woods. If I had my choice, I'd be sitting on a beach having a Marlboro, doing nothing, sitting, playing my guitar, that's it. Sienna. I've always wanted to punch someone in the face. And Jay. I killed my first deer when I was seven. On FM 94.9.
I'm going to do Why Are We Here in just a second. I'm going to tell you. I checked out createyourdesignonline.com. You're nuts. If you need posters made, if you need anything made graphic design-wise, Jared is your guy, period. He can do anything you need graphic design-wise. Create a logo for you. Anything you want, he'll do it. All right, so Why Are We Here? This is how we play Why Are We Here. We're going to pull a couple of names from a basket. They are characters that we do on the Mikey show. And then after we pull the characters from the basket, then we will have to pull the location that they're in and act it out. And it's a pretty simple concept. All right, so I got to pull two names. First, the characters, okay? The first character is Garrett. Our program director, Garrett.
All right, so we're going to pull another name. And then once we have the two characters, then we have to pull where they are. Jay. Yes! Woods, you can decide. Who do you want to be? I'll be Garrett. You be Garrett? Yeah, I'll be Garrett. Okay. You're Garrett. I'm Jay. Jay's our producer. And then let's see the location that we're at. Where are we? We are at a yoga place. Yes! Hey, Garrett. Fancy seeing you here. What are you doing? Hey, Jay. Good morning. How are you? I'm good. How are you? Hey, we got to keep our voices down because we're here at the... All right. I'll whisper. That ain't no whisper, pal. This is the best I can do. You're going to get us kicked out of here. Hey, Jay. Is this downward facing dog? Hey, hey, hey. Hang on a second, Garrett. Garrett. Excuse me. Hang on a second. What? You can't wear jeans and a jean jacket. Hold on. I'm going to take this off. I got my muse shirt on. For goodness sake, man.
Haven't you ever been to yoga before? Never. Is this your first time? Yeah, I'm not gay. I know. Well, I ain't either, but. Aren't you? All right. Maybe one time. It was in college. It was in college. Oh, you. Well, we've all been there. Anyway. Come in here for a minute. I want to talk. No, I don't. Listen. Hey, you're fired. You're going to. I'm fired? You're fired. I'm just kidding. You're hired. You fired. Oh, you did this to our afternoon DJ Tommy. Tommy. You fired him. Hired him. Fired him. Hired him. Fired him. Fired him. And then hired him again, and then fired him, and then hired him. All right, now, Garrett, I'm going to teach you something about yoga. All right. Got to get to your inner place, all right? Okay, let's see. Muse, muse, black keys, black keys, black keys. The bell brigade. That's your, that's, that's it. Broken bells, broken bells. That's your inner place? That's my inner place, broken bells. See, for me, I go the bayou, the bayou, the bayou, the bayou. Let me get to the place. Muse, muse, muse. Temper trap, temper trap. What? Broken Bells. Who did that? The Bell Brigade. Is this not a pose? He who smelled the Delta, that's a pose. First of all, you got to take off them chucks. Then, because you can't do yoga in chucks. I think my feet stink, though. Hey, do you got any odor freshener? Of course I do.
Is that any Dr. Scholes? I make my own odor eaters out of dryer tissue and cardboard. It's good. You just shove it right in your shoe. I shove it right in my shoe. Hey, I need to talk to you for a minute. What's going on? You're fired. Oh, no. Hey, bring your box. Pack your stuff and get the hell out of here. Yeah, pack it up. You're done. I'm just kidding. You're hired. Oh, thank you. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It's called Why Are We Here? Garrett and a yoga place. Fantastic. Take off the Jean and Jean Jack. Garrett and Jay at a yoga place. It's fantastic. So I want to see what people think about this. My wife told me that she knows a couple of people who were baristas. And she said that they took it upon themselves if a pregnant chick came in.
and ordered coffee, they took it upon themselves to give her decaf because they knew that coffee was a stimulant and, you know, isn't good for them if they're pregnant. And I thought, oh my gosh, that's taking liberties, man. I mean, and then I thought to myself, I bet you that could be a lawsuit. Now, I'm not going to tell you where they were at, barista or whatever, but that could be a lawsuit. Because the person could say, it's discrimination. Oh, gosh. They could. They could say that you are not serving me based on my pregnancy. So they refuse the right to serve anybody. Yeah, but you can't switch things out. What if a pregnant brought order to scotch and soda? And you could tell her, couldn't you say, no, I'm not giving you a scotch and soda? Couldn't you do that or could they sue you? You can't do that. You can't give like a... ginger ale and be like, yeah, that's a scotch. You can't just switch it out like that. Can you refuse service? No, you can only refuse service if it's based on... Unruliness, maybe? There's a sign up that says we reserve the right to refuse service to anyone. Anyone. But it's different if you switch it out. Yeah, but if you... Okay, but can't you get sued? If I go in there... What if I'm a black guy and I go in there and I go, I'm not going to serve you because I don't like black people. If you say it's because of that,
Then yes. What if there appears to be no other reason? See, that's what I'm saying with a pregnant woman. It is discrimination. Discrimination, right? If they were saying, yeah, oh, they were unruly or, you know, I didn't like the way that they talked to me. They were rude. Yeah. But if you say the reason is because they're pregnant, yes, discrimination. And they didn't. They didn't switch it out. I just thought it was incredible that somebody, you know. I'd switch it out. What? You would, Jay? I would absolutely switch it out. What are you, barista MD? Hey, it's my feelings. If a woman can have a glass of freaking wine. If a woman can have freaking wine, man. Maybe it's for her friend. Her husband. Yeah. She's picking up a coffee. I use a decaf as well. You don't take matters in your own hands. Don't I? I agree. No. I would do the same thing as Jay. You would? I would not. It's none of your business. She came up to buy cigarettes. I wouldn't sell her cigarettes either. That's a git. I'm not hurting her. I'm making her stronger. Sienna! It's not your... Not your place. Not your place. They're a customer. Yeah. Customer's always right. You can throw your two cents in there, maybe. Serve it. Oh, then you're going to be in trouble for sure. Heck yeah. 570-1949. It'd be like if I go to Denny's and somebody gives me the light butter. And they don't tell me. Because they're like, hey, guys overweight. They give me egg whites. They bring you an egg white omelet. I'd be like, oh, sorry. This is not what I ordered. It's better for you.
It tastes the same. I'd lose my mind. I wouldn't do it to somebody because I wouldn't want it done to me. Like, hey, Tubby, we're not going to give you a Big Mac. We're going to give you a chicken sandwich. It's different, though, because the barista is being the voice for the baby. Yeah, the baby. Not for you. And here's the deal, Woods, is that a Big Mac and those two things are so different. Chicken sandwich? Be one of these deals if you didn't know. See, most people aren't going to know the difference between the decaf and the regular. What if they give you a veggie burger? You'll know. Not necessarily. Oh, you'll really know. I heard some of them taste pretty good. Yeah. You heard completely wrong. I've never tried one. Yeah. There is no way that anybody could present you with any good, the best veggie burger they think they have, and you would think, side by side, comparison, that you would not be able to tell which was the veggie burger. True statement. I am a connoisseur of Big Macs. Of course. But if somebody did this, let's say that you ordered a cheese omelet. And they got non-fat cheese. And they put that on there. Oh, yeah. I mean, they're taking it upon themselves. Yeah, easy, Robin Hood. Yeah. What are you doing? Now, I may not think to myself that she should be drinking the coffee or whatever. But I got to serve them. Yeah.
Most people probably don't want to sell a pregnant woman a pack of smokes. But you have to. Oh, my God. Oh, man, that's tough. It's wrong to these people. You have to. If it was Jay's story, it would not. Yeah. But see, there were guys, when I worked at that gay-friendly bar in Chicago. Remember that time you did? Yeah, at that Mass Potato Club. You remember that? There were guys in there that were alcoholics, straight-up alcoholics. I served them martinis real good. Well, I would, too. You can flag somebody. Two at a time. You would do that, Jay, but you wouldn't serve. Yeah, it's not hurting. I mean, it's up to him. It's his body, but when there's a baby on board kind of thing. What if he's got, I mean, I don't know. How do you know it's for that pregnant person and not someone else? I guess if she came, if I saw her come in and she drank it the first time, I would go, oh, okay, next time I'm going to hook you up. 570-1949. M1, Leah from El Cajon. Are you there? I'm here. What's up? As it is, I went to a bartending school up in North County a while ago, and they actually said if you have someone that comes in and they're pregnant and they order a drink, you have to serve them. Same with caffeine, cigarettes. If they come in to buy it.
You have to serve them. I don't think it's a problem if a pregnant woman has a glass of wine. And doctors say that it isn't a problem. Well, new studies say it's a problem. Do they? But scotch is another. New studies. Yeah, a kamikaze shot in a Jaeger back is probably the worst thing, you know? I mean, when I was pregnant, especially, like, when I was having really bad contract, I had a little wine. You know, my doctor said it was cool. I'd have one glass of wine, you know, and that was it. But it's totally different if you're pregnant and you're going to a bar and you're getting squashed. Bye. Thank you. I appreciate it. You know, I got this email from my cousin and it was talking about how if you were born before 1979. So if you were born anytime before 1979. Now, a lot of this, I'm going to tell you straight up, is SG&T. Sounds good, not true. Okay, I'll tell you that straight up. But, and LOP is going to come out of her skin here in most of this stuff. But it says, if you were born before 1979, wow, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin. They ate blue cheese dressing. They ate tuna from a can. And they didn't get tested for diabetes. Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with brightly colored lead-based paints. And somehow we survived. True story.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles. There was no locks on doors or cabinets. And when we rode our bikes, we had baseball caps on. We didn't have those little helmets that you see everywhere today. And as infants and kids, we would ride in cars with no car seats and no booster seats and no seatbelts and no airbags. We had bald tires. Sometimes our brakes didn't work that great. We were riding in the back of pickup trucks on a warm day, and it was really, really cool. And we drank water from a guard. hose not from a bottle and we shared a soft drink with four of our friends from one bottle and no one actually died from it and we ate cupcakes and white bread and real butter and we had bacon and we drank kool-aid made with real white sugar why because we were always outside playing that's why it was safe to play and we'd leave home in the morning we'd play all day as long as we were back before the street lights came on And no one was able to reach us all day. And it was all right. And we'd spend hours building go-karts out of scraps. And then we'd ride them down the hill only to find out that we forgot to put brakes in them. And after running in the bushes a few times, we learned how to solve the problem.
We didn't have PlayStations and Nintendos and Xboxes and there wasn't video games. There was not 150 channels on cable. There was no videos or movies on DVD. There was no surround sound, no CDs, no cell phones, no personal computers, no internet, no chat rooms. We had friends. So true. 1979 and before. We went outside. We found friends. We fell out of trees. We got cut. We broke bones. We broke teeth. There was no lawsuits because of these accidents. We ate worms, mud pies that came from the dirt. And the worms didn't live in us forever. We got BB guns for our birthdays. For our 10th birthdays. We made up games with sticks and tennis balls. And even though we were told it would happen, we didn't put that many eyes out. Not that many. We rode bikes. We walked to our friend's house, knocked on the door, rang the bell, and then just walked in the house and talked to them. Little League had tryouts, and not everybody made the team. People who didn't have to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that.
God forbid. Oh, no. You are not first place. You don't get a trophy. You didn't make the team. Maybe you go try harder next year. The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law. These generations have produced some of the best risk takers, problem solvers, and inventors ever. The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation, new ideas, freedom, failure, success, responsibility. We learned how to deal with it all. Do I sound like an old man, by the way? I probably do to most people. If you were one of these people born before 1979, congratulations. You might want to share it with people. Now, I read that to my wife. My wife goes, nah, SG&T. Oh, come on. I said, what do you mean SG&T? She goes, really? She goes, why do you think they took the lead out of paints? Yeah. Why do you think they did that? How come you think you're not allowed to ride in the back of a truck anymore? I don't know. Maybe 450,000 kids bashed their brains in or flew out of there when there was an accident. Same thing with helmets on bikes. Everything you just read, I did. Yeah. And was all the way in on, and I'm here. Now, you're one of the people that's still here. There are people out there that died from it. I'm not one of the chosen few. You know what I mean? I'm in the majority, man. That's how everybody lived back then. Well, see.
There's a part of me that hears decaf, pregnant women, coffee, pregnant women. Please. My mom didn't know she was pregnant with me until she was six months pregnant. Oh, wow. My mom wasn't throwing back a couple of Scotch old fashions. Yeah. Because she was. You know, that doesn't make it right. I'm not saying it's right. I'm just saying, man, we sure do. freak each other out boy we and we worry about every little thing and there's so much conflicting information out there this is a glass of wine is good for you when you're pregnant jay just said no no it's not new study say it depends on your doctor exactly exactly it's like rolling the dice man half the time don't get vaccines get vaccines vaccines cause autism no they don't cause autism you have to get them to prevent mmr i mean when jamie and i were about to adopt our kid i was like dude do we do it do we don't Lead-based paints, it's going to kill your kid. I used to eat lead-based paints. Yeah, I used to eat the crib. I'd make popsicles out of the crib. That explains a lot, though. I don't know. I think that there's a big part of us that we make a big deal out of nothing. You know, what's his name? George Carlin said, I used to swim in the Hudson freaking river. He died pretty young. No, he didn't. No, he didn't. He died pretty old.
He lived a very rich, full life. He was in his 70s. Well, he did cocaine every day for 15 years. That didn't help. But the guy says, I used to swim in the Hudson River. That disgusting toilet. Can you imagine now? Oh, somebody were to jump in the Hudson River. You'd never let your kids swim in the Hudson River. Never. I mean, you know, I'm on both sides. I'm on both sides. I could see how people think we freak out too much. And then on the other hand, I go, maybe you put a kid in the car seat. Yeah. Yeah. So then fly through the windshield. Yeah. If you saw somebody driving with a kid like jumping around the backseat like we used to do, you'd be like, I'm calling the cops. Yeah. Right now. For sure. But my wife said that like kids now, they got to ride in car seats. Supposed to. So they're like six or seven or something. I'm like, are you kidding me? Your kid's about to be five. He'll be in a car seat for another year. Two. Another two years. Two years. They're supposed to be. Now that. That's a little bit nuts. That's embarrassing. It is. Yeah. You're in a kindergarten in a freaking car seat. Yeah. It's just a booster seat. It's not the same as a car seat. The booster. It's a booster. Then they can see out the window better as well. Why? That's not why. That's not why they do it. But I'm telling you, but that is, but it helps because Jasper actually, when we go on long trips, we put him in it still. It's about safety. He's eight years old. But still, it's like, it's a weight. It's a weight thing. It's crazy. We only do it when we're going on long trips on the freeway.
I know it. He's 15. He's like, dad, I got to get the frigging booster. At eight years old, he's not worried about being embarrassed. He's like, oh, I'm eight. Really? Like, I don't have to be embarrassed. But he's like, hey, look, I'm crazy. Dad, I don't want to ride in the booster anymore. You're riding in the booster. We're going to the Grand Canyon. It's a long trip. Dad, I already do the thing where when we go through Southwest, I have to be in a baby Bjorn so we can board quickly. Now, I know you've made love to women already. Of course I have, Dad. I'm old enough to do that. You're my son. I know, but I don't want to ride in the booster. You're riding in the booster. It's a long trip. First of all, Dad. I don't want to go back to the mountains for the fourth time this week. I don't. I'm just telling you. I also don't want to make our own butter, and I don't want to slaughter our own food. I'm just telling you. You're over it, huh? I'm over it. You want to go on a real vacation? I want to eat a cheeseburger that we get from Wendy's, and I want... Please. No. I'm tired of killing my own cows. It's filth. I got to butcher our own cows, okay? I have to grind our own sausage patties. You're going to look like Mikey and Woods if you keep eating at Wendy's. That's fine. That's fine with me. It isn't fine with me, but... I hope he wants that. There's a kid, standout Indiana basketball player, survived his second plane crash. Serious. We got an email. Reminded me so much of something that I had talked about on the old days. I'll explain.
Oh, and the story of the J is coming up. With everything in this country tied up in the court systems, I think we need a little more of this. Mikey Show now. Shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. Call 570-1949. This is the Mikey Show. On FM 94.9. Now, I'm just telling you, man, with AT&T wired, it's so easy for you to get all the speed you need at a really great price. I'm talking about $14.95 a month, and that's for a year with select services and a one-year term. That's pretty good, man. That's a one-year price guarantee. You know that right off the bat. And $14.95 a month, that's great. You pocket the extra dough. See, and that's kind of the theme of what I love.
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Get a $50 prepaid MasterCard gas card when you book with your MasterCard during Expedia's My Summer is Better Than Your Summer Sale. Where you book matters. Expedia. Minimum stay required and subject to availability. Book by July 4th. Travel by August 31st. Terms and restrictions apply. See site for full details. This report is brought to you by Big O Tires. Now at Big O Tires, you can buy a set of four installed Big O brand tires in stock. Get a $125 mail-in rebate. See your store for details for your nearest participating Big O Tire. Call 1-800-NEW-TIRES. Well, looks like Escondido on the 15 southbound between Center City Parkway, Felicita Road. It's stop and go this morning in the teens. Doesn't look so great either as you head on to the 805 northbound at the 94. There's somebody sitting under the overpass on that right shoulder. Watch out for him. Also, Carlsbad on the 5 southbound between Cannon Road, Manchester Avenue. It's stop and go there in the teens in most spots. This report also brought to you by the County of San Diego Vector Control Program. Fight the bite? Report green swimming pools. They could be breeding mosquitoes.
And you can call SD County Vector Control at 858-694-2888. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego, a Lincoln Financial radio station. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't have a best friend. I don't trust you. I have trust issues. Lauren. Am I what? Like feminine and girly. Eh, not really. I guess I can when I want to be. Woods. Nobody is more passionate about donuts than me. Sienna. I'm a ring person. I love gems. And Jay. If you need that person, I'm there to do it for you. On FM 94.9. Ah, man. Weird. My problem. Get it together. Sounds like somebody's got a case of the moonbees. Yeah, I guess. I guess so. So, Woodsy was talking about the Indiana basketball kid during the break, and I was just screaming. Please save it. It's so good. And Woodsy was so fired up, he was just talking about it. We'll tell you in a second. Woodsy, I believe, has a radical take. He does not believe it's radical. It's not radical at all. But we'll see.
Sienna, what's going on in the news? Okay, well, the San Diego Music Award nominees have been announced, and Dynamite Walls is the top nominee for the 21st annual award ceremony with four nominations. Close behind, Switchfoot has three nominations, Augustana, Little Hurricane. I didn't know Augustana was from here. I didn't either. Yeah, Little Hurricane, the Donkeys, and Crocodiles. Now, voting began last night at 9 p.m., and it runs... through 5 p.m. on July 25th. So if you want to vote. You got to go to the polls. They have probably in people's garage. Winners will be announced on August 8th at Humphrey's Concert by the Bay on Shelter Island. Also, Japanese researchers have found radiation in all 15 people that were tested last month. They live in the area right near the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant. They found cesium in all of the participants. The ages of the participants were from four. to 77 years old. Now, they are saying the cesium numbers are small enough. I don't know what cesium is, but I know it's bad. It's bad. It ain't good. Yeah, the numbers are small enough that it doesn't represent a health threat, which is good news, but you don't want to be told there's radiation inside of you. Woods, what's going on in sports? Kurt Busch got his first road course win in the Sprint Cup Series with a nice performance at the Toyota Save Mart 350. It's here in California. It was in... It's up in Sonoma. There's actually right turns in it.
Yeah, exactly. It's not just left turns. It's not just left turns. But, yeah, he won. And Carl Edwards is the current points leader. He finished third. And also, T.O., Terrell Owens, he'll be a free agent here as soon as the lockout's over. But he just had surgery to repair his ACL. Now, some people have reported that he hurt his ACL working out, while others are reporting that, no, in fact, T.O. hurt his ACL filming a television show. Which, it's... Totally believable knowing him. Yeah, an older player that hurts his ACL is not. Yeah, that ain't good. But he wants to come back. He wants to play again. I'm Mikey. That's Woodsy. That's L-O-B. That's Sienna. That's Jay. And our phone screener is Chris. It's cross. It's cross. We really had a difference of opinion on this. Weird. But Woodsy, I believe, has a strong take. Very strong take on this. It was an Indiana basketball player. Yeah. His dad was flying them in an airplane. And there was an accident and a plane crash. Killed his entire family except for him and his dad. Yeah. His mother died and two siblings. This is back in 2003. His father was the pilot.
Now, what just happened? Well, he's now 16, Austin Hatch, and he and his father were flying in the plane. And his stepmother, his dad's now remarried, was also in the plane. Plane crashes again on Friday night. Dad dead, stepmother is now dead. He's the only one that survived. He's now survived his second plane crash. He's 16 years old and plays basketball and is going to actually be playing at the University of Michigan. He's like an incredible basketball player. Yeah, if he survives. Right. They say the next 24 to 48 hours are going to be critical. So, Woodsy, tell everybody what you were saying. His dad is, I was like, it seemed to me his dad was a murderer. When I read it, I was so moved by it and so upset to think that this kid has had to endure this now twice. And now he's lost his entire family again. And you blame the dad. A hundred percent. He's piloting the plane. Obviously, pal, after you wiped out the first time, you clipped a power line, killed your entire family, except your kid. You're going to get in a plane again and you're going to go on the same trip because it's the same trip that he'd been on before. You crashed again and now you wiped out your entire family.
Again. Okay, but don't you see that he was trying to do what most people would try to do if they have courage, which is to get back on the horse. See, it's different for me. When you wipe out your entire family, this guy lost his sister, his brother. Well, then you're blaming him. It is no longer an accident. Like, an accident means, you know, you didn't plan that. And you're putting the blame on him. You're saying, you're like, dude, you're just a loser. No, no, no. I'm not calling him a loser. You're calling him a murderer. Yeah, he murdered. Okay, so you. But you're saying, look, you're incompetent. Obviously, he's incompetent. He's killed like seven people flying planes. Maybe you don't fly anymore after you wipe out your whole family. Okay. Maybe you take a bus. Maybe you drive a car. You're an anesthesiologist. Get you a nice Benz. Rent a Benz. Drive up to your country home on the weekend. After you've killed your whole family. 570-1949. Is it irresponsible or is it courageous? Well, here's the deal. It is, in fact, irresponsible since he has now killed himself. Two wives and two kids and a dog. So that is the definition of irrefreaking responsible. Well, here's my thoughts. I go, okay, if you have an accident once, I don't say when you have a major accident, even when people die, if you're in a car or a boat, okay, a boat, you're sailing. You go out there and you sail. And because of your negligence, you go aground.
And your family, many of your family members die. I say don't say you're complete, you know, inept. Get back out there, you know, try it again. You know, but you're saying no. If lives are lost, what if lives are not lost? Are you inept? You want to sail? Go sailing. Don't load up your entire family again and go sailing again. What if they didn't die? What if nobody was injured, but there was an accident? There was an accident. Then you go again. Yeah, yeah. But doesn't it prove that you're still inept? No, because I think when people die, I mean, a plane crash is different than a boat crash to me. A plane crash to me is very heavy, and it's a big, big fear of mine, too. And so I'm like, I can't imagine putting this kid through this again. Now this kid's going to wake up from his coma and be like,
Oh, cool. My dad and my stepmom are gone, along with my mom, brother, and sister, and family dog. They were flying to the exact same place, too. Same trip. Their home, yeah. Isn't this kid an adult? He's 16. Oh, okay. No, he's fine, then. He's a hard ass. Well, I don't think that the- Lose your whole family. I don't think that the father- Do you believe the father was trying to kill his family? No, of course not. Well, then how can you blame the guy? Because it happened twice, and now he's dead. Well, it happened once, and he tried again. Right. Fly by yourself. Don't load this kid that's already been through a friggin' plane crash. Don't load him up again and then kill yourself. Well, what we don't know is how the kid felt about it. It's true. If the kid was gung-ho, then... Yeah, if the kid was gung-ho, I'd be like... It just, man, it broke my heart when I read it. I was like, you're an idiot. Idiot. Wow, I want to know what people think. 5701-949. Do you agree with the Woods? Is this guy just a complete jackhole? Obviously. No, it isn't obviously. What he's proved is that he's a bad pilot. Yeah, he's a hell of a flyer. No, he's proved that he's a bad pilot. Maybe a bad dad. I don't go there. I don't go there. I think he was trying to get back on the horse. But he's a bad pilot. Yeah, obviously he's a bad pilot. Maybe one of the worst pilots ever. See, I don't think he may be the worst pilot. Really?
Well, no, you're basing the higher death toll or no, you're basing it just on the death toll. Yes. What if they had, what if they had crashed, but nobody died? So then he's fine. You know, he's still a bad frigging pilot. Okay. So if they had crashed, well, what about this woods? What if they crash and there's no deaths and he says, all right, you know, most people would say, forget this, but I'm not going to do that. I'm going to get back on this thing and I'm going to, I'm going to, I still think that's pretty irresponsible. You do. Yeah, absolutely. 570-1949-M1, termite finder in Rancho Bernardo. NTSA would have had to have done an investigation on the original accident. If they found that he was an incompetent pilot, they would have taken his license from him. They would have grounded him. Well, I think the death toll speaks for itself on the fact that he's an incompetent pilot. Hey, I've crewed helicopters in the Army, and I've seen guys flying to the side of a mountain that were some of the best pilots I've ever flown with. But it doesn't mean that they were, you know, things happen sometimes. Yeah, and it sounds like things happen twice. I never even considered. Like, I just said flippantly right now, well, it's proved that he's a bad pilot. Maybe it hasn't. Maybe he's a good pilot and something tragically went wrong twice. I know he clipped a power line his first time. I know that. Because I don't know why he clipped it. Yeah, I mean, like this guy said, I don't know, man. I just don't go, oh, you're a loser.
How dare you try again? Woods is maybe saying try again, but just don't put your family in there. When I read it and I thought about that poor kid, man, and losing his brother, his sister, his dog, his mom, I'm like, gosh darn, dude. Getting in a plane with that guy to do that flight again, it was really creepy to me. What about a car? Car's different. Everybody, because everybody drives. I mean, everybody drives. It's way more common than flying. But what is that? As far as what we all do. Walk me through why that. changes it though because it's like if if i well let me put it this way if i got in a wreck a car wreck and i killed my wife two fake kids and my dog then you'd never drive i don't know that i could i really don't know that i could i mean i don't know like be on the coaster i just make you drive me like i need to go to 7-eleven get a can of snuff you make that right that'd be fun but i would do that i'd probably ride a bike i don't know you would yeah now you're lying driving's a little bit different You're more likely to die in the car than in the plane. I know you are. I know that you are. But I also have a lot of experience driving. A lot. I got 16 years of driving every single day, a couple hours a day. You know, it's sad. I want Derek from Carlsbad. Yeah, I don't know. I agree with Wood, man. You screw up. Yeah, it's an accident. All right? Like, you messed up. You killed your family. That's an accident. Not his fault. But when you do it again, like, it's courageous. But don't change your whole family, you know? Go by yourself.
And try it. Get back on the horse by yourself and then start bringing your family in. If I'm the kid, I'm like, hey, dad, are you taking the plane? I'm going to just catch a ride with Tony. He's going to drive me up there and hang out for the weekend because I'm not getting a plane with you. And I might say, hey, dad, I love you. I don't think you're a bad pilot. I think it was an accident. Ask mom what she thinks, how good a pilot you are. Tragically, mom is dead. Oh, yeah. But that doesn't make you a bad... Don't blame yourself. In Woods' world, he's like, hey, pal. Make sure you blame yourself, all right? I want you to walk through every day of your life just knowing you murdered your wife. Yes. Come on. Clown. Listen to this. Holy Toledo. Now, when I was at the old station, we got, I don't remember if it was a phone call or what it was, but some dude called. I think we were talking about stupid reasons that you didn't like somebody or something. And this guy went to Donovan's on a date. ordered a grilled cheese sandwich. They don't like make grilled cheese sandwiches at Donovan's. And he thought that she was WT. He was right. He said she was smoking hot, but he was out on it because who does that? You know, and I do think, man, if you're going to go to a nice restaurant, maybe you just sack it up and you get a salad, you know, but chicken breast or something, you know, but anyway, what are you six years old?
And if you're a vegetarian, you don't have to get meat or other... Anyway, listen to this. Mikey, I went to Roy's with this girl, and she ordered it off the kid's menu. She got penne pasta and butter. Do you guys think that's lame? What is she, 12 M1 Don? I feel it's childish. No. No, it's portion control. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, Jay, so she got pasta with butter. Yeah. Isn't portion control also not eating everything that you're given? You know what else is at Roy's? Fish. That's what you can get at Roy's. Fish. We should waste it. We should just waste. Take it home. Take it home. Yeah, maybe she didn't want to. They're going to the movies afterwards. Oh, boy. What are you going to do with it? It's a portion control bit. I don't think it was about portion control. I absolutely won't. I think it was about somebody really liking. Noodle and bite. I like fish. I don't like fish. I like noodle and bite. She doesn't like seafood. He took it to the wrong place. Really? There's not just seafood on the menu. You can get other stuff. She doesn't eat a lot. She's a vegetarian. Saving him money. Oh, my. It's by definition. Jay would be all the way in on it. By definition. Oh, absolutely. She's a vegetarian. It's like $3.99. Thank you. That's perfect. You going to pay for that? Kiss her right on the lips. Yeah, kiss her. I give her.
Big old lipstick marks on her chin. Why do I have lipstick on? Because I'm Jay. Weird. Weird old creep. Why do you think I do? Maybe you don't worry about it, Mike. Why do I have lipstick on? It's none of your business. I like lipstick. I like to put it on the dungeon. What's wrong? I like a little rouge from time to time. From time to time. So what? By rouge, I mean I like to prick my finger and put the blood on my cheek and rub it in and make it look like rouge. It's childish. It's way childish. Maybe you just nut up and you order a salad. Well, by definition. So that you don't look. By definition. It's a date. By definition, isn't it in fact childish since it's off the child's menu? How about I be able to order whatever I want to order off the menu? Lauren O'Brien. Yes. Come on. Talk to me. You would do that? If there was nothing on there that appealed to me and I wasn't that hungry, yeah. Why not? Yes. Can I order off the child's menu? I would judge you. I'd make a joke at it. I'd be like.
All right, I know I'm not a kid, but I'm not really that hungry or something like that. And then, you know, you'd have something to talk about. It's an icebreaker. Maybe. That'd be fine. If she did that. But if she just ordered butter and pasta. Macaroni and cheese. I would just point on the menu and go, I would like this, and the guy would never know. They usually don't have printed out children's menu. Yeah, they do. They've got little cartoons on them. You color on them. I would know when the hot dog came to the table. I would know. I thought you were already there. Chicken fingers and french fries. Yes. You got a macadamia nut crusted like sea bass. She gets a hot dog. Hot dog with mac and cheese. And a Shirley Temple. Yeah. She's a picky eater. So what? I'd say run for the hills right now. Just cut your losses and bail. Mike's wife is a picky eater. What are you trying to say? What? She didn't used to be though. She didn't used to be. What are you trying to say? She didn't used to be. Woods. What? She didn't used to be. Well, she used to eat meat. Now she doesn't. Well, that isn't the definition of picky eater. Well, she used to eat a lot more stuff than she does now. She used to eat chicken and steak. And that was the only two things that she ate. And she wouldn't even eat all forms of it. Hamburger meat? Forget it. Really? No.
So should Mikey run to the hills? Yeah. Well, hey, listen. Well, maybe you should have back then, but I'm saying now you're all the way in. Listen, I am in love as it gets. It'll drive me crazy sometimes. She knows it. Now, for me, though, it was one of those deals where I go, okay, multiply that times 10. Can I live with it? Yeah. I can live with it. Well, she's way hotter than you two. Yeah. It's 100% right. You weren't going to run anywhere. What was I going to do? Where are you going? Where am I going to run to? You're technically not going to run anywhere. Am I going to walk to the hills? Am I going to drive to the hills? You were lucky she fell in love with you before she ever met you. Yeah, I mean, you had it. That was just a little... When you found out she was so picky, you were like... Dang it. That's the one thing. Oh, really? Augustus Gloop, you're really upset that your wife doesn't eat a couple of things? That's what your complaint is? Look at her. Look at you. Are you going to wheeze to the hills now? Yeah. I'll tell you what. Yesterday, I drove through In-N-Out for her. Yes, I'll take a number two grilled cheese, no beef, onions, no tomato. Yeah. It's delicious. Yeah.
If you're a rabbit. Onions? They're good. Onion, no tomato. Mm-hmm. Rebecca, ever picky about the food? What'd you get? I didn't eat there. You know what I ate? What? I ate aguachile. Isolate. Say what? Isolate. I had aguachile. Mm-hmm. Chili water? That's what it sounds like. Dorian? Just... wrote it on Facebook in response to what would be a great dinner tonight. He wrote it. It got in my head. I couldn't get it out of my head. I drove to Escondido to Northgate Mexican Market where, by the way, they speak Spanish and I don't know what to... I'm humiliated when I'm in there because they're like... And I go, I don't know. I don't know. I don't speak Spanish. And they look at you with this quizzical look. You look like you speak the language. Fluently. Yeah, like you could be teaching a course. You can be real with us. Why are you pretending that you don't speak Spanish, sir? And so I went and got ceviche and I got the chips and I ate it in the car on the drive. It was so hot. This morning was not a great morning. That's all I'm going to say about that. It's a lot more difficult. It's the price you pay.
It's good stuff. Yeah, it is. And then went through In-N-Out and got my wife her cheese in a bun. It's really delicious. It is delicious. Rebecca doesn't eat anything. I made a list one time. Call, babe. I made a list one time. Try to get her on the phone, Jay. Look at it. I made a list of the things that she likes to eat. It was about a paragraph. And then I blogged and made a list of the things that she won't eat. And I'm not kidding you. You could put your cursor on the scroll thing and press down for seven, eight seconds. Wow. And just go. Of all the things that Rebecca will not eat. She doesn't need any kind of sauce. It doesn't matter. Soy sauce, any kind of sauce. Ketchup? Nope. You know why? She doesn't know what's in it. Ranch? No. On a very, very rare. Wow. It's more sauce. Sauce. Marinara sauce. Hoisin.
No way. Hoisin, soy. Never. Hollandaise. Never. Hollandaise. Oh, never. Never would she eat hollandaise. That would almost make her gag. Oh, my gosh. I could drink a gallon of hollandaise. She won't eat. These are the types of foods she will not eat. Thai. Oh, wow. Chinese. Any kind of Asian food. No way. Hates Benihana. Hate. It's her least favorite place is Benny. And it's our favorite. It's our favorite. Least favorite. Discuss her. Disgusting. Even the rice? Everything. What about the volcano with the onions? When we go... Sorry, babe. When we go, she will ask me to ask them to please cook the stuff on another part of the grill. Hello, my love. Hi. Hi, my sweet. How are you? We're good. We're talking about all of the things that you do not like to eat. There's just a couple. Yep. I'll say the name of it. You say yes or no in terms of eating it. Chinese food? No. Thai food? No. Indian food? No. Mexican food? Yes. Can I tell everybody what you'll eat? Sure.
Quesadilla. That's not true. I'll eat vegetable fajitas. Vegetable fajitas. I love Spanish rice. Yep. That is true. That's a true fact. And quesadilla and cabbage salad. Yeah. And that's it. Yep. That's it. Let's see. Barbecue. No. Seafood. Oh. Nothing. Nothing ever out of the... What about shrimp, though? No. What about lobster? Well, that comes out of the ocean, doesn't it? Mm-hmm. Let me see. What are we missing? Pork chops? And she's a vegetarian on top of that. Yeah, not pork chops. That's, you know, she's a vegetarian. Oh, eggs. Anything with eggs. Wow. Unless it's baked like bread or brownies. So it's true. Opposites really do attract. Yes. They attract. Yes, Jay, they attract. Opposites attract. Attract. Menudo.
Oh, no. Oh, that's disgusting. True. I'm trying to think. This is fascinating. You'll eat pizza, right? Yeah, I can eat pizza. Cheese. Cheese pizza. Do you eat all kinds of cheese, or are you particular? No, I like all kinds of cheese. You don't eat the cheese that Mikey likes. By the way, that's not true. She doesn't like all types of cheese. I like a lot of veggies. Not all, but a lot. I like almost every fruit. Oh, thank you very much. I like a lot of stuff. Do you like cauliflower? No, I don't care for it. Do you like Brussels sprouts? But it's not my favorite. Do you like Brussels sprouts? No. Lima beans? No. Tomato soup? Oh, I don't eat soup. What about beans, babe? Hold on. She doesn't eat soup? Nope. None. No kind. No kind of soup? Chicken noodle? What do you eat when you're sick? She doesn't. Top ramen? Ginger? No. Doesn't like top ramen? Oh my God. Do you like mac and cheese? Yes.
Okay. It's on the safe list. She has the diet of a seven-year-old child. It's true. I do. Brownies and mac and cheese. Yeah. Peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Phoebe and Jay. Quesadilla. Quesadilla. That's awesome. They're all delicious. It would be so great if we'd be like, hey, babe, let's try out this new Ethiopian place. Can you imagine? Yeah. Honey, you don't like the rice at Benihana? No, it has egg in it. Oh, my God. I love you. I love you. Bye. My God. It's freaking fascinating. Here's something Woods and I were talking about. Speaking of fascinating, Woods had guesses when Sienna said that Jennifer Aniston got a tattoo. Oh, yeah. And I'm like, how do you have guesses? How would you possibly? He goes, you don't? How do you not? And I'm like, if you're a dude and you have a guess, like 5701949.
It was the first thing I thought of. I'm fascinated enough. You want to check your man pond. Me? 570-1949. Dude, that's not Skeletor. That's Terminator's wife. You think you got something worth adding to the Mikey show? At 949Mikey at gmail.com. That's all I want to hear. Or call Mikey now. 570-1949. I don't like how this is already beginning. FM 94.9. Hello, it's Hillary with some shows for you to go check out. Like Anya Marina, she is coming back to town. She'll play the Casbah on July 7th. And Black Rebel Motorcycle Club play the Del Mar Racetrack July 29th. The next FM 94.9 about the music show is with the Bell Brigade at the Belly Up for $6 on August 2nd. Weezer plays the track August 6th.
Big Sonic Chill presents Sia at House of Blues August 11th. Death Cab for Cutier at the Remax August 16th. And there's a ton of other shows this summer, like Company of Thieves, The Kills, TV on the Radio, Two Door Cinema Club, Peter, Bjorn, and John, The Naked and Famous, The Foo Fighters, and The Damned. So there you have it. Get out there and see some shows. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 concert calendar online at fm949sd.com. Life's better with baseball. Hit you. And the 2011 season rolls on with more than 145 live Padre games exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego. And then, join John Weisbarth, Jenny Kavnar, and me, Bob Scanlon, for the Saquon Casino postgame show. And as always, be sure to like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter all season long. The Padres begin their series with Kansas City, 630 Monday.
From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse, go behind the headlines and sports pages and get to know the real people who don the Padres' uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego. There's a rumor that San Diego is home to one of the most brilliant, insightful, and educational culinary TV shows ever created. And then, there's my show. But it's big in taste and small in effort. Sam the Cooking Guy, Sundays at 5.30 and 7 p.m., only on Channel 4 San Diego. Hey, gang, it's your OPW, your old pal Woods. And I got to tell you, I did some gaming this weekend, but I did some PS3 gaming. I played for about six hours on Friday. If I had the HTC Trophy phone from Verizon, I could be gaming right now, okay? I'm sure Mike would love it. I'd be gaming on the air. I'd be playing Kinect Sports. on my HTC trophy. Get to Verizon and demo the new phone and you can win an Xbox 360 with Kinect. This thing has Xbox Live integration. So if you're a gamer, you can connect to all your boys. You guys can be gaming all day long. If you buy the trophy, you get a free Xbox 360 game, Halo Reach, Kinect Sports, or Lode Runner. Get into Verizon, check out the new HTC trophy. There is a new celebration inspired by a world far, far away.
Wild creatures, both real and imaginary, will be honored. Ancient arts, both magical and daring, will be performed. It's called The China Celebration at the San Diego Zoo. Come witness Kung Fu without getting into Kung Fu fight. Taste authentic Chinese food without waiting for delivery. Meet real Chinese animals born and raised in America. Purchase souvenirs actually made in China. Honor monkeys in Year of the Rabbit and lots of poo-poo. No platters. Only at the China Celebration. Celebrate the wonders of the Far East at the San Diego Zoo's China Celebration. From jaw-dropping acrobatics to wild animal encounters, it's sure to be a magical evening for all. Open nightly June 25th through September 5th. Visit sandiegozoo.org for details. And the fun doesn't have to stop when you leave the zoo. Stay connected to the animals with games and videos on our new kids' site at sandiegozoo.org. Explore today. New. Youthful. Innovative. Lots of words mean fresh. Add Mercedes-Benz to the list. That's because the 2011 lineup of Mercedes-Benz vehicles is the youngest and freshest in the luxury car class. Take the C300 Sport Sedan. A rare combination of luxurious refinement and racing pedigree, its agility control suspension lets it handle with precision even when driven hard.
See your authorized Mercedes-Benz dealer about the 2011 C300 sports sedan, and you'll discover that for 125 years, Mercedes-Benz has also been synonymous with value. Get the 2011 C300 sports sedan at 1.9% APR for 24 to 36 months, or lease one for just $349 a month for 33 months with $3,894 due at signing. A new year, a new level of innovation from Mercedes-Benz. Available only to qualified customers exclusively through Mercedes-Benz Financial Services and participating dealers through June 30th, 2011. Call 1-800-FOR-MERCEDES for offer details. See your Mercedes-Benz dealer of San Diego County. Visit Hohen Motors in Carlsbad, Mercedes-Benz of Escondido, and Mercedes-Benz of San Diego. Chicken, chicken, we just want to make chicken. The machines want to make chicken. Robot's trained to kill, but let us make chicken and we'll promise we'll chill. Chicken, wait us what you make. Apparently, the machines really want to make chicken, but at Carl's Jr., we don't let them. Introducing the hand-breaded chicken filet sandwich, because things made by hand are better.
And that's just the way it is. Only at Carl's Jr. For a limited time at participating restaurants. I'm Samantha. I'm a Fresh and Easy neighborhood market customer. This message is by a real customer, not a celebrity. Saving money we pass on to you. I'm always looking for savings and wanting to eat healthy foods. I feel good about no artificial colors, no artificial flavors. With the Fresh and Easy products, it's high quality and it's also affordable. Thanks, Fresh and Easy. Thanks, Samantha. Now everyone can save on F&E boneless, skinless chicken breast family packs. Fresh, never frozen, for just $249 a pound every day. Century 21 agents are high-tech gadget packing problem solvers with an appetite for getting things done. Call one today. Century 21. Smarter, bolder, faster. This report brought to you by 5-Hour Energy. Not a morning person. Well, you might want to try 5-Hour Energy. Won't believe the difference it makes. Amazing and unlike coffee, 5-Hour Energy is ready right now. 5-Hour Energy, the cure for mornings.
Okay, let's see. Chula Vista, problem here. Otay Lakes Road at Allen School Lane. We've got a car that rammed into a pole, but there aren't any injuries, thankfully. National City, the 805 northbound ramp to Plaza Boulevard. A car stuck over on that right shoulder, and it looks like it's pretty much stop and go on the 805 northbound between Balboa Avenue and the 52. This report also brought to you by Mossy Nissan. Come into any of the six Mossy Nissan locations. You could test drive the all-new zero-emission. 100% electric Nissan Leaf. They're now accepting orders at mossynissan.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. cardboard stick and it's got cotton candy wrapped around it. I feel sorry for them. That's a true statement. Lauren. The best way to clean your house? Yeah. In your underwear. Woods. You know what's good? Cheesecake. Sienna. I do everything for Todd, I swear. I pick out his clothes. I make his meals. I make all of his appointments. And Jake. I have a boob man. On FM 94.9. Tonight's 8 o'clock album. Telekinesis. 12 Desperate Straight Lines is the album.
And so Woods says, Woods fascinates me. I love your takes. I would have never thought that about the dad flying the airplane. Murderer. Yeah. Crashed. Got back on the horse. Crashed again. Killed more people. Woods says he's a murderer. He's an irresponsible murderer. Jennifer Aniston got a tattoo. Woods is like, I bet I know what it is. I'm like, how do you bet you know what it is? How? And he's got guesses? Yeah. And he goes, you don't have guesses? I'm like. I don't even have a guess of what it like. Really? Phoebe's face. I don't know. Now you're just being a clown. Property of Ross. Yeah. She doesn't have a husband. You know, she's not going to put like his birth date. Right. She's a 40 some year old woman. I mean, give me guesses, Woods. Oh, dude. All right. Daisy of some sort on her hip or on her ankle or an Asian symbol that says tranquility.
On the back of her neck. Okay. That one is, yeah, plausible to me. A hundred. Yeah. I mean, when I saw the article, I go, you know what? I'm not going to read this because I know Sienna's going to have it. I'm not going to read it and I'm going to take guesses. That was the first thing that popped into my head. I was like, on the air, I'm going to take guests. No guests. I thought of a couple things. I thought one would be like strength tattooed and pretty cursive, like on her wrist. Oh, that's good. Right here. Yeah, because she's single and people criticize her all the time. She's going to be strong. And then she goes to Hawaii a lot. So I thought maybe like a plumeria flower, like on a butt cheek or something like that. I thought she was, you know, like to me, it seems like she's too. I think she tries to come off as very deep. Yes. Maybe that's what drove Brad Pitt out. Well, the other thing that's so strange about it is Angelina Jolie's Miss Tattoo Broad. She seems so squeaky clean, that Jennifer Aniston. Well, I'm totally on board with what she got. It's her very first tattoo, and it's on her foot, the top of her foot, written in pretty font. It says, Norman.
which is her dog that passed away in May. Her Welsh Corgi Terrier mix, who she loved, lived to be 15 years old. And I mean, she went everywhere with that dog. Love that dog. And he died and she got Norman on her foot. She broke my heart. I have goosebumps. You do? Yes. In real ones? Yes. It's sweet. What if her dad's name was Norman? Would you guys be in on that story? They wouldn't have goosebumps. I don't think so. Woods would not have given the paddle claps. No. But I think that's a ballsy and cool move because I would do something like that. Took a lot of courage, didn't it? Yeah, it did. I think Norman was like her rock. Norman was there. That's her man that stayed by her side, the only one. That's right. And he died. Only a dog could stay by her side, I think. Oh, wow. Jay. Yeah, she's a beating. What? Where's your personal knowledge of this? Just any time I hear her talk, I just want to run screaming as well. As well? Nobody said the first time. That they wanted to also. Brad ran screaming. Okay, I guess. I see what you're saying. I'd cheat on her. No, I didn't say I'd cheat on her, but I would run screaming. I would cheat on her with somebody if I was in a movie with them. She was just asked what her favorite word was, and she said Norman with a tear in her eye. Aww.
That's so sweet. Very sweet. That's sweet. I cut that part of my heart out. I don't have that thing. That's too bad. No, I'm happy for it. It's less grief. It causes me less grief. It's less understanding, too. Yes, it is a little bit hard-hearted. You're very hard-hearted. You callous. It's a bit callous, which is a sign of being a psychopath. Minus a bit. It's callous. It is callous. In fact, most of the time, I have to feign. Yes, you do. You fake it. I fake it. At my house, if you come to my house and my dogs are like jumping on you, he's like, oh, hi, hi. It's such a fake bit. Well, what am I supposed to do? Love them. Hi, babies. Oh, you're so cute. Pet them. Grab a treat. It scares me that I'm going to step on them. You won't.
And if you do, we all have. So it's no big deal. They're used to it. Well, to me, it's a big deal. I don't want to step on animals. Well, right. But it happens because they're around your feet. There's five of them. I stepped on Penny the other day, yesterday. And she goes, he's got four Yorkies. And when they're all running around, it makes my heart beat. Now, Woods likes to be wound up. He was outside with a 357 Magnum last week, right? Yes. He's underwear. Twice. In his underwear. Twice. Yeah, twice. You know what it turned out to be? His dog's tail. He thought there was a prowl. It was about 9.30 at night, and I hear this. I hear. And he's like, I shot out of bed. I had boxers on, and I grabbed that .357 Magnum, and I ran out there, and I couldn't find anything. I couldn't. I looked outside. Well, that's because there was nothing there. It was my dog's tail. It was his dog's tail. Thumping against the wall. Thumping against the wall. You know, if you shoot something in your backyard, you'll still go to prison. That's fine. My wife and dogs will be safe. Yeah, but I don't have that because when I was a kid, I had a dog that meant a lot to me, and the dog died, and I took it really, really, really, really hard. Of course. As most kids would. As all kids do. Well, you know, I think I was... I was fine with it. Well, no. What I'm trying to say to you is that it was more profound to me than when a close family friend died. Sure.
And so that's unusual. And so what happened is I cut myself. Now I don't have that. You know, I don't have that. So now I, you know, when stuff happens, I'm like, well, that's very sad. But I feel like Dexter. I feel like Dexter. I feel like Dexter that I've watched people and observed what people act like and then I mimic it. And I go, oh, that is so heartbreaking. That is so, so sad. You would be the character in the movie that... everyone would think be least likely to end up with the puppy. And then in the end, you'd have this like special bond and you'd be like, come here, you. Yeah. Fall in love with the puppy. Fall in love with the dog. Like I find this dog and it, you know, it's the, it's the most unlikely scenario ever. Get out of here, you. Scram. But when friendships bond, friendships bond. Don't look at me like that. It's the story of a man and a dog. Norman! That's it. It's just like that movie As Good As It Gets. Jack Nicholson hates that dog and then at the end he's like, I'll watch the dog. If you just drop it off, I'll just watch it. It's no big deal. I'll watch the dog. You eat what we eat. This summer.
yourself for an emotional thrill ride. I don't like that dog. I don't want any dogs around here. I don't like dogs. Until one dog changes everything. I don't want this dog, honey. Don't you understand? I don't like dogs. But one special dog has made his way into his heart. Why do we have to keep this dog? I'm telling you, it's going to do nothing but tear up the house. Something inside changes him. He and the pooch. Every man finds a place in his heart for the love of a dog to reign. He'll get you. What about a little chihuahua?
That suits you. That's perfect for you. I don't want any kind of dog. You love Taco Bell. Yeah. I love Taco Bell. Jack Nicholson playing a Mexican. Just because I'm a Mexican doesn't mean that I need a chihuahua. Did you hear Jay? Did you hear Jay? No. He goes, how about a hot dog? Get it like a wiener. I bet you'll eat a hot dog. If I just went into your heart, no problem. Chili dog. Corny dog. Or a corn dog. Fine Mac. There's a couple dogs you'd like. Hot dog, chili dog. Devil dog. Devil dog snack. It's a little Debbie on it. You'll like it. Little Parker, you know you'd love it. You just call her Debbie. Old Debbie. Deb, for short. BFF Deb. Gosh, when? Just yesterday. Oh, that's... You're faking. I know you're faking. No, no. Yeah, you are. How long did you have her? 15 years. I'm so sorry. Are you sorry? Are you really sorry? Oh, man, I... Dude. What was his name? Dexter. His name was...
Dexter? Have you put any flyers out? No, he's passed away. When I say I lost him, I mean I lost him. He's gone. Oh, my gosh. Oh, God. Yeah, you're not going to win any Academy Awards with me because I know your bit. What do you mean you know my bit? It's a fake bit. You, in fact, hate animals. I don't hate animals. Yeah, you don't like animals. I don't actually hate animals. Mike. Wood's taking that bit. Dude, I am so sorry. Are you really? He's like a family member to us, you know? Slept in bed every night. Yeah, yeah. Cuddled and... I'm so sorry. You remember when we tried to adopt a kid and it didn't work out? He was there. He was there the whole time and just kind of... Changes things. Really helped us through it. I've known that cat longer than I know my husband. Yeah, yeah, sweet deal. Really? How many long...
Intellectual conversations have you ever held with that cat? It wasn't really so much as verbal communication, so much as just companionship and support. Loyalty, really. Yeah. Just loyalty. Isn't it sad to know that that cat didn't know you existed? Oh, he did. When he fed him and changed his sand. My cat was like a dog, so. Yeah, he would fetch things. Did he? He'd fetch things? Yeah, and sit in my lap. Oh, perfect. Bringing back squirrels and mice. That's great. Boy, that sounds like a lot of fun. For the cat. For Dexter. Dexter really enjoyed it. Must have been great to open your door and see a bloodied, gutted little mouse, huh? He was just doing what nature called for. So are you going to come to the memorial that we're putting on for Dexter? For sure. We've actually contacted a taxidermist.
And we're going to have Dexter stuffed. So if you didn't get to say goodbye, you can get a final pet in. Well, what we're going to do is we're going to let everybody that comes to the memorial have 15 minutes alone with them. You know, I don't need the whole 15 and I would hate to hold the lineup. Well, we're just going to pass them around lap to lap. Right. And then you just say what's in your heart. I'd rather not touch them. And here's what's in my heart. Well, you didn't really touch him when he was alive. Yeah, that's true. You didn't touch your own cat either. No. You know? I dissected a lot of cats in... That's inappropriate to bring up. How's that? It's insensitive. Anyway, it's Saturday, and it goes from 1 p.m. to 8.30 p.m. That's a long memorial, isn't it? You don't have to be there. When your uncle died, it was a three-hour memorial. You don't have to be there. And that was with the potluck. Well, he was a drunk, so... Yeah. That's true. Nobody was stuffing our uncle. Right. Because that would be weird. He didn't crap in sand. Your cat. Sometimes he did. Like I said, he was a drunk. Or in the pool. Wherever he felt like going. In the pool. In my closet in a hat one time. He did it one time in a baseball cap, but that was one time. One time on a baseball field. That was true, too. Yeah, he got arrested for that. Right on home plate. Yep. Then he covered it with a newspaper.
And then it was found by the janitorial service. Groundskeepers. Groundskeepers. That's probably not a good day. I think the bathrooms were locked, so he really had a choice. It's a good family story. There's always a choice. Either that or he could have gone in his pants. No, he probably could have tried to be a man and get to 7-Eleven. I don't think he was a man. I don't think he was any less of a man. In fact, probably more of a man. I don't know. Willing to take a dump on home plate. Wow. I don't know, though. You know, taking a dump on a home plate to some may be more inappropriate than telling you that I dissected cats. Well, he really liked Dexter, so we're not going to speak ill of our uncle. I don't know a cat that's ever cropped on a home plate. So, you know, that means that the cat. You don't hang out with a lot of cats, Mike. I think it was behind a dumpster anyway. I don't think it was really on a dumpster. It was. You're not really qualified to speak on it. It was, and it was Woods. And it was me. It was Woods. Apple doesn't fall far. Okay. So. At least the cat had the decency to do it in sand that he could cover it up with. Well, I think Dexter would come to your memorial, okay? Yes. I don't think Dexter would because Dexter's a cat. Well, he will. He'll be stuffed. Cats don't care about people. He cared. No, he didn't. He doesn't care presently because he's not with us presently. He's dead. Are you coming or not? Can I put you down? Because we're getting Phil's barbecue. I'll be there. I'll definitely be there. How'd you tell him about the barbecue? That's true. Now I know why he's coming. Better not be the only reason you come, Mike. Dogs are different. Agreed. Dogs are different. I agree.
This weekend, Jake was walking, tripped on jewels. I wanted. Oh, no. And it made Jake cry. I wanted. Oh, boy. Don't say it. Don't say it. Say it. I pictured mounted in Alaska. I pictured, you know how the deer's heads stick out of the wall with the antlers? I pictured jewels mounted. His little head. Sick. Was it Jake's fault or was it Jules' fault? How great would that be? Imagine that. I'm never coming back to your house again. So Jake's arm was broken then, right? Oh boy. No. Stitches? He ended up fine. Broken fingers? No, he just cried. But it was Jules' fault. Was it Jules' fault? Yes. Or was it Jake's fault? It was Jules' fault.
Because you know what Jules does? Exists. Exists. Breeds. When you walk, Jules gets in front of you and he walks in front of you. He raps sometimes. Yeah, he'll rap in between your legs. Yo, yo, yo, my name is Jules. I'm a cat. That was a crazy idea. Jules. Jules, Mikey's cat. Maybe every once in a while. Why are you tripping up kids? Did Mike yell at you? Did you hear him when he said that he would like to have your head mounted? Yeah, you know, when he did that, I cried tears of joy. Why? It's better to be mounted. That did not be paid attention to whatsoever. Did anyone say, bad kitty, bad? No, I even, I'd pee, I'd poop, I'd do anything to get them to scold me. Just one bad kitty, that's all you need. Yeah, but you know what? Hungarian nanny's got the sister in town, so maybe they'll pay attention to her. Does Nita ever play with you or anything? No one does.
Do you understand? I do. When I come over. Do you know what no one means? Well, I do. When I come over. Yeah, twice a year, you come over. That's a true story. He's usually hanging out with Jay Rhodes. Yeah, you're always with Jay Rhodes. You know what? Jay Rhodes exists more than I do. Who? And Jay Rhodes is a fake friend that you made up, so you don't have to hang out with Mike. He's a real friend. It's a scapegoat. I can show you his Facebook page. He's a real fake Facebook page. No, it's real. I did not create it. I'm getting ready to do that. Just so somebody will talk to me. Good idea. There you go. Yeah, that's a good idea. Let's hear more about Nita's sister. Oh. Is that Jay? Yes. Of course. He's really a creep. Yeah. The creepiest. How come he's so popular on the show? I mean, he's so popular. He's so creepy. Beloved. They love him. Mm-hmm. Even though he's so creepy. Yeah. Maybe you should try being creepy. Yeah. That would work out for you, too. Take it to the house. Again. Careful that urinary tract... What? What? Isolate. Come again? Cats get a lot of urinary tract infections. That's the same. What? Yeah, we get a lot of urinary tract. Drink some cranberry. Yeah. Colors and power. Wow.
I want to play Name That Tune. Oh, boy. 570-1949. Call us and pick us. What's that tune? Yeah. You're going to pick me. I'm doing my bit. I'm winning. Do it. You do your bit and you get it wrong. You get points taken away. Fine. Okay. What's the prize, Jay? The prize is lunch for four at Smash Burger and a pair of tickets to the San Diego County Fair. Nice. It's a good prize. So call us and pick me. Sienna, Woods, or L-O-B? 570-1949. Give us a call right now and play this game. And what's the theme? America. All right, cool. Little Sunshine has a temper sometimes, but he's not all bad. Mikey. He's a real beef castle. 949 at gmail.com. The what? More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Here at the Coors Brewery. Our viewpoint hasn't changed in nearly 140 years because right outside our window is a stunning view of the Rockies, the only place legendary Coors Banquet beer has ever been brewed. Banquet is made with only Rocky Mountain water and the best high country barley for that smooth, full-flavored taste. We've been doing it that way since 1873.
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Mow your lawn. Oh, you should, hon. Get a $50 prepaid MasterCard gas card when you book with your MasterCard during Expedia's My Summer is Better Than Your Summer Sale. Where you book matters. Expedia. Minimum stay required and subject to availability. Booked by July 4th. Travel by August 31st. Terms and restrictions apply. See site for full details. This report is brought to you by Keep Your Home California. Are you unemployed or do you owe more than your home is worth? Federal funds are available to help you. You don't have to lose your home. Visit KeepYourHomeCalifornia.org or call 888-954-KEEP. Well, it looks like Mountain Laguna area, the 78 before San Felipe Road, they've closed that due to an accident. A signal alert has been issued. It's a possible fatality there. The entire roadway is shut down for this investigation. Via De La Valle, southbound ramp to the 5, a disabled tractor trailer. And we have a two-car crash in Escondido on the 78 eastbound at Nordahl Road. This report also brought to you by Burger King. This weekend, Burger King celebrating the 4th of July with the original chicken sandwich. Just $1.04. A true American original, $1.04.
starting July 2nd at Burger King. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. signature fragrance. Lauren. When I was in my performing troupe of Two Mermaids, me and my sister, we once performed at a farmer's market. Woods. Pink is the new wine. Sienna. It makes me really sad when someone honks me. Like for the whole day. MJ. I'm not afraid of rats. I had a pet rat. On FM 94.9. Most likely later this week we're going to be talking to Lips from the band Anvil. Yeah. Yeah. Anvil used to be a heavy metal band. They made a documentary. Still are, pal. Yeah. They used to be a heavy metal band. They still are, but very small audience. They did a documentary on them because back in the early 80s, they were on this tour in Japan with Metallica and all these big acts. All these big acts, they went on to sell millions of records, except for Anvil.
Every single act that they're on stage with was a massive band. Massive. And they just never, ever went on to do the same thing. Just couldn't get it done. Not only that, but people thought very highly of them. Lars on Anvil. When Anvil first showed up on the scene, it was like, this is cool. This is a statement. Like, literally, these guys are going to turn the music world upside down. Slash on Anvil. Anvil was one of those bands that just put on this really amazing live performance. Lips, the singer, used to come out with this bondage harness on. He used to come out and play his flying V. I mean, it was just in complete insanity. And that's why it was such a huge turn on for us kids. It was like something we'd never seen before. Now, I'll be honest. I don't like the music.
I don't like what the music stands for. I'm not into any part of the music. But I love documentaries. And I love an interesting story. And I love the study of human beings. And I love watching human beings in their natural habitat. And that's what you get to do with this. You recommended that documentary to me. And I watched it. And at the end, there's a scene where, I won't spoil it, but I sat up out of my bed and started clapping. I did not. I did. I know. You were really happy. I was happy. Slow clap? I was not. No, it was like a, yeah! One of those. Wow. And loud. And my reaction was, how very sad. No. We had very different reactions to their whole lives. But Lips, the lead singer, will talk to Lips. I can't wait. Yeah. We'll be talking to Lips later in the week. What a fascinating... how we both have such a different reality with it well if you haven't seen it rent it because it's only about an hour and 20 minutes and it's freaking great
Sienna, what's going on in the news? Well, Lady Gaga has been accused of charity scam. Now, if you didn't know, she had some bracelets that came out after the earthquake and tsunami hit Japan. They were just like a Livestrong bracelet said, we pray for Japan. She charged $5 for it. And then there was some other, you know, $3.99 for shipping, $0.60 tax. And people are saying that she inflated the shipping costs and pocketed all the extra money. And so she could be in some pretty big trouble. She's being sued for racketeering and corruption over these. Also, a new study came out from the American Cancer Society. And this isn't just any study. They studied over 123,000 people's health outcomes during a 14-year period. They found that women who sit for more than six hours a day were about 40% more likely to die during the course of the study than those who sat for fewer than three hours per day. And men were about 20% more likely. So women, the longer they sit, the more likely they are to die. 40% more likely. Men, 20%. I had a 20% chance. Maybe we stand up. What's going on in sports? Well, if you didn't hear earlier, the Padres did win their second series in a row. They took two or three from the Red Sox, and they took two or three from the Braves. Two really good teams that won the series, and that's how you get better, man. You win a series here, you win a series there. So they took two or three from the Braves this weekend at Petco. Now they will welcome the Kansas City Royals in. First game is tonight, 7.05.
And it is Jeff Francis against Matt Latos. Okay, so we're going to play Name That Tune. The theme is America. America. The prize is what? It is a four-pack to go to Smashburger and a pair of tickets to the San Diego County Fair. Do we have to give you title? You can give me either or. Title or artist. Title or artist. Okay, first, M1 gets sticker maker from IB. Who do you want? Mikey. All right, hang on. M1, Ninja from Claremont. Who do you want? L-O-B. Hang on. M1, Jason from Mira Mesa. Who do you want? I want Sienna. Yeah. Really? And finally, M1 Lizzy from Carlsbad. There you go. Who would you like? Would she, please? There you go. Winner. Let's do this. All right, we use our name as a buzzer. When we recognize the song, we use our name as a buzzer. Here we go. Mikey. Mikey. America the Beautiful. Here we go. Judgment call.
What? Neil Diamond. Feast. How did you not get that one? I know. It's your boy. This one's tough. Here we go. Mikey. We're the kids in America. Weak, bitch! That's actually the kids in America, but... But he said kids in America, so I gave it to him. Here we go. What? Lauren. Oh, she just said dang it. Who is it, Lauren? It's Katy Perry, but... God bless you, Johnny. Gotta go with the judge. Shit. She goes, dang it. Here we go. Mikey. Living in America. Oh, my God. Stop putting the clips that are the words of the song. Who sings it? You know. Oh, it's James Brown. Of course it is. Here we go. Mikey. Rage Against the Machine. Somebody's hot today. Mike for Lauren and Woods won. New bit is working. Yeah. Here we go. Woods.
Soundgarden? You better know that. What was the song? Fourth of July. Boyfriend. Lauren. Tom Petty. Dang it. Great audio. I know. Live. From Hamburg. It was live. Live in Hamburg. We were actually hearing it from Hamburg. Skyping. Are we ready? Yes. Okay. What? Is that the Violent Femmes? Never would have got that. Good job. Nicely done. Score. Sienna. Yeah. How you doing? I'm killing it right now. Just quiet. Mike, four. Lauren, two. Woods, three. All right. We're just going to let this ride out. Of course. Yeah. Woods. That's Lenny Kravitz. I thought I'd be able to get that. I knew it. I knew it. Here we go. Mikey. Mikey.
Lee Greenfield. Lee Green. What's the name of the song? Proud to be an American. Lee Greenwood. Lee Greenwood. I'm giving it to Woods. Woods has now jumped ahead of you, Mike. So what's the score? Mike 4, Woods 5, Lauren 2. Okay, this is a two-pointer. Son of a... Here we go. Woods. No idea. Both of you get points taken. Mike has to get it right. You don't get to play any music yet. You got it wrong. I don't have to go, do I? No, but I'm going to play it. I can get ahead of you. You have to guess, Mike. You said your name. Yeah, I know, but I didn't get called on. He didn't get called on. Oh, so he gets two points taken. Can I guess now? No, you can't guess now. I know it now. Boy, I'll tell you what. I was wrong. Toby Keith. Yep. There you go. She's on the board. Son of a bitch. Mike won. He always tries to screw me. You shouldn't be happy for him. No. That's BS. BS. You did good, Mike. Thank you. He called L.O.B. when it should have been me. She knew it. She called it. M1 gets sticker maker from IB. Yeah. Are you there? Hey. Congratulations, buddy.
You're a winner. Unbelievable. Hang on a line. I get hosed all the time on the judgment call. Yeah, do. I do. She gets hosed all the time. Do I? She gets hosed all the time. For those of you that listen to the podcast back, rewind right here and you'll hear something. Yeah, sign me up for that. You gotta listen real carefully now. It's so subtle. Real subtle with some use. But if you listen real close, you'll hear it. Oh, God. Dear. Mike's so good. Mormon is going to laugh his way. Mormon. Cry his way all the way up. A little mission. Dear diary, I'm going to make a list of all the phallic symbols. That way, if there is said, there will be room for a joke. Dear God. Let me just put feedback. Pickle.
Bucket. Pickle. Banana. Pickle rocket. Wiener. Hot dog. Marker. Highlighter. Pen. Roller. Stitch stick. Empire State Building. Snake. Worm. Touchy roll. Heat-seeking missile. Heat-seeking missile. Submarine. Tube. Sorry, had to buy a new diary. Subway sandwich. Chalk. Scissors. Submarine. Airplane. Train. Oh, my God. Tadpole. Tadpole. Weasel. Ferret. Mink. Shark. Needlefish. Needle. Swordfish. Sword. Any sort of rodent. Spear. Hopefully a guinea pig. Microphone. Sienna.
Is this a real story about the TV mom? Yeah. What TV mom? Florence Henderson. Oh. Is that Carol Brady? Yes. Uh-huh. She just wrote a new memoir? She did. And she said? She said some revealing things, things that are going to shock you. What? One is while she was married, she... And the late New York City mayor, John Lindsay, got together. I don't know who John Lindsay is. He passed away in 2000. Okay. But he was the mayor of New York City, and he gave her a little something. A diamond necklace? A child. A watch. Crabs. Great shot. Oh, ow. Right to the baby maker. I thought you just said crabs. I thought you just said Carol Brady had crabs, but that couldn't be it. She did. What year did she say? I don't know. Was she on Brady Bunch? Because if she was, then I'll never see Brady Bunch same again. Did she have crabs when she was doing those Crisco commercials? She was in the kitchen. That's filthy. She's in the kitchen. Get out of the kitchen. You have your hand in a thing at Crisco. So don't be crabbing around. Your crabby hands are in Crisco. Your crabby hands are cooking. There's crabs in the Crisco. I'm convinced of it. I'll never eat Crisco again. I have a question for you guys.
What do you do if you give a girl crabs and you didn't know you had them? How do you not know? You have to know. Because I know what he did to apologize. And I'm just wondering, what would you do? Too late to apologize. What do you do to apologize? You send a picker to Red Luster? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Sushi. Fishing. You can hear Chris, our phone screener, laughing from the other room. And it's a sound isolated booth that he's in. And you can still hear him laughing at it. He gets me. Oh boy. Well, he thought, the mayor, John Lindsay, thought it was appropriate to send her flowers and a note of apology. How do you not know? In a very small comb. Dear Carol. Carol! Dear Florence. I'm sorry I had to mark out Carol, but I only have a pen. I'm very sorry. about giving you crabs. I didn't know, and I just found out. I am so sorry for any discomfort, itching, or painful sores that this may have caused you. Explanations you owe to the wardrobe people. I hope it didn't pass to your husband. My sincere hope is that you do not give this to Mr. Brady. And by the way, I caught these from a dirty mattress. Thankfully, Mr. Brady is gay.
Yes. In real life, Mike is not liking women. That was grammatically incorrect. Was that a rumor? Was I allowed to write that? I'm so sorry again about the crabs that I gave you when we had an affair. They were from me. Don't tell my wife. Or your husband. Or the producers. Or anybody in the press. Alice. Because I'm the mayor. Don't tell Alice. Here's the people I'd like to ask you not to tell. Alice, Sam the Butcher, any of the seven dwarves from that one episode. There's three blonde B-words. Yes. That are your daughters. The rabbit that you guys dyed pink that one time. Oliver, the little freaking jinx. You can tell Peter, but don't tell Bobby. Don't tell Bobby. Don't tell Bobby. Huge mouth. Greg can handle it. He's been there. Yeah, Greg probably had him. And you should know since you slept with Greg. Yeah. It's a true statement. Yes. Skipping. Skipping is skipping. I thought they made out. True statement. They did not have. No, they didn't. Yes, they did. Real good. Barry Williams said that they kissed. Yeah, I thought it was just a.
And it wasn't even her. It was the girl that played. It was Maureen McCormick. Yes, he hooked up with her too, but he also hooked up with his TV mother, Florence Henderson. Everybody knows that. Can we bet on it? Yeah. If you're wrong, will you take hot chili sauce to the tongue? No. Why? I would. Because you are 100% uncertain of this fact that you just gave it. No, because you'll do hot chili. Google. Well, I know, but you like hot chili sauce. That's not bad. I'll give you what? 50 bucks. All right, I'll give you 50 bucks. Wow. I'll give you 10. I'm Googling right now. I remember when Florence Henderson was on Dancing with the Stars. She didn't have sex with Greg. No, but Greg came while they were filming the behind-the-scenes dancing footage. Easy. Came and hung out. Oh, my God. Stop you creeps. Can't say anything. And he hung out and she even said, yeah, we had a relationship for a little bit, but she didn't go into detail and said that they were very close, closer than the rest. No way. They didn't. They did. No. Yes, they did. Hey, Jay, I know how it's done. So you don't have to show me with your hands because I'm an adult man.
With children. With three kids. With three kids. I know how it's done. You don't have to illustrate for me. With a donut and a carrot, you don't. I thought maybe you'd forgotten. It's not a carrot. In my case, it's two number two pencils stacked next to each other. Can you picture that? Because that's what it is. It's two number two pencils stacked end to end. Now, picture a praying mantis trying to write with that instrument. A prey mantis. A prey mantis. I'm going to have to show it to you. Please don't. I have this. It says, did Florence Henderson really date Barry Williams? And he wrote a book called Growing Up Brady. Growing Up Brady. And in chapter 13, he described one evening out of the town with her during a promotion for the book that year. I know what happened. I remember now. You read the book. She, to make him feel like a big boy.
They went on a date, okay, to make him feel like he was a big boy. Go ahead, Sienna. It's just saying the whole thing with Barry got blown way out of proportion. This is Florence Henderson. I guess, in a sense, it was a date because Barry thought it was. But, of course, I had no idea that his intentions were to, quote, unquote, date me. It has made for a real good story, though. Yeah, they slayed. You gotta read between the lines. She just said it. No. She gave him crabs. You gotta read between the lines on that. Hey, Mike. I mean, clearly, she gave him AIDS. They even have a kid together. Yeah, they got a kid together. You know that? That's Mike Brady. Oh, wait. I'm early, right? Yep. I just thought that was such a great way to do it. Get out. Give me $10. I owe you $10. Instead of the 10, I'd love the chili on the tongue. Yes, do it. Do it, Woods. Company of Woods. I'll do Frank's Red Hot. That's about as hot as I go. I'm allowed to say whatever I want. What about the habanero? No, I thought it was true. It is true. It's a well-known fact that Carol and Greg did it. You haven't proved it yet. Dude, that's why I saw her. Once she started reading the story, I was like, oh, yeah, I remember this story. Get her on the phone. That was it, too. I interviewed her. Did you ask her about it? Yes.
It was the big thing. And she goes, yeah, you know what? I've asked both of them. Yeah. I interviewed him, too. I don't know why, but. I don't know why you interviewed either of them. I know. He was selling those cruises or something at one point. Mm-hmm. Here. And it was a date. Frank's Red Hot doesn't count. Frank's Red Hot. Oh, my God. Really? You just did that for no reason. Yeah, it was. No one agreed to that. That was like, he might as well have, like, poured bleach in his ear and been like, here you go. And I'm like. Great. I don't have a bleach agreement with you. It's so hot. He does things just to get out of stuff, but it makes it worse. I know. He's like, whoa, can you believe it? Wow. That's spicy. I ate a piece of broccoli. I didn't tell you to eat broccoli. I don't care. That's spicy. That's chili sauce. That's chili sauce. I ate a cheese stick myself. It's like ketchup. What does that say on there? I had a donut. It wasn't in eclair. What's that right there? Hey, what's that? I ate a vanilla. I ate the vanilla wafer, Mike. What is that? I had Boston cream pie. And I don't even eat Boston cream pie, and I don't like Boston. I had strawberry cheesecake, not original. There's no whipped cream, Mike. I did it for you. That has been fulfilled. See, I did it for you. Oh, that's hot. I ate sushi, Mike. I didn't tell you to eat it. I ate it. But I didn't tell you to eat it. Mike.
We're even. We're even, Steven. We're even. Three drops. The guy put some Frank's Red Hot on his tongue and he's like, oh boy, I tell you what. I'm sweating. You did that to yourself. I am sweating. Oh boy. When we come back, we're going to do the story of the J. Here's what it is. He doesn't know? I know. He has no idea. We tell you current events story, and then we will go to Jay for the interview. It's going to be so gay. Let's go to the next. Bye, gorgeous. Good job. Here's Patrick. Excellent job. 570-1949. Or text at 949mikey at gmail.com. More coming up in just a couple. FM 94.9. Life's better with baseball. And the 2011 season rolls on with more than 145 live Padre games exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego. And then, join John Weisbarth, Jenny Kavnar, and me, Bob Scanlon, for the Sequoia Casino postgame show. And as always, be sure to like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter all season long. The Padres begin their series with Kansas City, 6.30 Monday. From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse.
Go behind the headlines and sports pages and get to know the real people who don the Padres' uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego. There's a rumor that San Diego is home to one of the most brilliant, insightful, and educational culinary TV shows ever created. And then, there's my show. But it's big in taste and small in effort. Sam the Cooking Guy, Sundays at 5.30 and 7 p.m., only on Channel 4 San Diego. Hi gang, it's OPW, your old pal Woods. That's right, let's hear it. Three cheers for OPW. Listen, gotta tell you about the Verizon HTC Trophy. It is a new phone, and what you can do is go to your Verizon store today and demo this thing. So if you demo it, yeah, you could go home a winner of an Xbox 360. Who does not want an Xbox 360? The thing about this phone that makes it so cool, it's got... Office. It's got Xbox Live. Yeah, it's got Xbox Live. You can connect to all your gaming buddies and game from your phone. So go to Verizon. If you buy the HTC Trophy, you get a free Xbox 360 game. You can choose from Halo Reach, Kinex Sports, or Load Runner. So get to Verizon. Try out the new HTC Trophy. Make that right. Tell them your old pal Woodsy sent you. When did it become okay to make products designed to be used once and then thrown away?
When did everybody come to accept the idea that a thousand disposable products were just as good as a single one built to last? When did quantity replace quality? At Jeep, we believe that every new Grand Cherokee that rolls off our line should last. And so we made it that way. From the hand-stitched leather on the steering wheel to the 5,400 welds in the body, every part of this car has been designed, engineered, and built to last. That's what we believe at Jeep. The things we make, make us. Jeep is a registered trademark of Chrysler Route, LLC. Lease Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo 4x2 for $2.99 a month for 39 months with $24.99 due at least signing for well-qualified current lessees of competitive vehicles. Tax, title, and license extra. Call 1-888-925-Jeep for lease details. Offer requires a dealer contribution and lease to Ally. Residency restrictions apply. Must take retail delivery by 7-5-11. I'm sitting in seat 23D on a 10-30 flight to Omaha to visit my family. But the drink cart is nowhere in sight, and I really want a Coke. I'm suppressing the urge to hit the call button. Suppressing the urge. Wait for the drink cart. Ah, my subconscious just made me reach up and hit the call button. Can I get you something, sir? Um, I'm sorry about this. I didn't mean to hit the call button, but since you're here, could I get an ice cold Coke, please? Oops, sorry. My subconscious is very thirsty. No worries. I'll be right back with your Coke. Just ignore me.
I think it just wants peanuts too. Family meal time is a lot like summer. It never lasts long enough. So keep your family at the table a little longer by preparing a great summer meal. And don't forget to stop by your local Stater Brothers and pick up lots of refreshing ice cold Coca-Cola. Summer's over before you know it, but there's still plenty of time to gather around the table with ice cold Coke. Coca-Cola, open happiness. Coca-Cola, open happiness. How to go on a tropical vacation without going to the tropics. Step one, go to McDonald's and order a new McCafe mango pineapple real fruit smoothie made with low-fat yogurt starting at $2.39. Welcome to McDonald's. Hi, I'd like a mango pineapple smoothie. Step two, lay in a hammock. If your car doesn't have a hammock, pull over and lay the seat back. Step three, roll down all the windows and turn on the radio. Ah, there it is, man. Step four. Slip off your shoes and take a long, delicious sip of your mango pineapple smoothie, savoring that luscious mango and juicy pineapple flavor. Step five, repeat step four as often as desired. McDonald's new mango pineapple smoothie, starting at 2.39. The simple joy of paradise in every sip.
Price and participation may vary. McDonald's would like you to know that they're open late. They're also open late, late. And way late. In fact, many locations throughout San Diego County are now open 24 hours. So drive through any time. Participation varies. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. For those of you that have never seen me, I'm a short, chunky guy. Lauren. I was the creep. Yeah. I was kissing boys when they were sleeping. How old? Four. Woods. I like... Being out in the country too, man. Throw a dip of snuff in, have a couple beers, kind of feel like a man, right? I want to fly to New York just to go to the Pop-Tart store. And Jake. I can cry now at the drop of a hat. Something just sad happened. On FM 94.9. Yeah, what happens? It's where they tried to put the IV in and I was holding Rebecca's hand and flinched. Wow, I can see why. Because I'm such a baby. Well, no, it's because I'm a baby. That's not their fault. You're a delayed bruiser. Yeah, you are a delayed bruiser. It's not their fault. He flinched. Yeah, dude, I'm a baby about needles. I don't like them either. I hate needles. This text says, Jay can kill two stones with one bird. Someone book one. That's good. And when Josh says, Jay once patted me on the back, and I now list it on my resume. That's freaking brilliant. That's freaking brilliant. Both of those are great. Very good.
I have a workout today. Yay. Are you going to try to cancel? Can't. Can't do it. She already wrote me. And said you're not canceling. Yeah. That's what you need. Yeah. I wish that I wasn't so fat, but I don't want to do the work to get out of the fat. I wish there was a machine that you could go into and that would just mold you the way that you wanted. And then you could eat whatever you wanted. I just don't understand why stuff like donuts have to be so fattening. How come they can't be like broccoli? How come they don't have the effect on you that broccoli does? So you can just eat. People are like, look, donuts, you can go wild. With donuts, you can just eat as many of them as you want. If you're hungry, snack on some donuts. Just don't eat any broccoli. Now, I will say this. If you have a great week, you've been doing good with your donuts. Give yourself one day. You got a cheat day. Where you get broccoli. We'd probably want it. I know. That'd be the difference. Probably. We'd be like, I gotta get some broccoli. Dude, you got any broccoli? Get some broccoli. Hey, babe. Don't tell Jake. Meet me and Henry's and bring a big bag because we're filling that son of a gun up with some broccoli. With some unsalted, raw stuff. Uncooked. I want the big, thick stalk at the bottom. I just eat it right off the stalk. Are you eating broccoli again?
No. What's wrong with you? I swear the guy did not eat the name broccoli. Oh my gosh. Babe, Woods brought that over. You're disgusting. I'm so sorry. Again with the broccoli? Just give us a couple donuts. We'll be fine. Fine. I'll make up for it and I'll have four donuts. You better eat these donuts. How great! That is what heaven is. In my mind. I get up to heaven and I'm like... Oh, my God. It's a Krispy Kreme. And I can eat whatever I want. That's heaven right there. Just eclairs everywhere. Just a conveyor belt with hot donuts. And just my mouth's open at the end of it. You just call that Monday. Wow. Sienna. Yeah. Wimbledon is over or is it still going on? It's still going on. It's going on right now, yeah. And there's a tennis player there that's got a real special. Yes. His name is Novak Djokovic, and he has been really missing his dog, Pierre. Now, Pierre, you know, you can't really come to Wimbledon, but he is making a big fuss because he wants his dog, Pierre, to be there by his side at Wimbledon. You can't have the dog on the court. Chase the ball around. He can't, like, go sit with someone on the side? No! It's Wimbledon, man! So what?
Give me a break. I don't care if it's freaking La Costa. But Pierre has gone over there. He's there, but they won't let him in, too, obviously. All right, let's talk to Pierre now. It's time for the story of the J. Hi, Pierre. You are the dog of what is this guy's name? Novak Djokovic. Okay, so you're Novak's dog? C. Hi, Pierre. It's great to have you on. What's up, Bethesda? Not too much, Pierre. Listen, homebrew, I want to bring my dog. You are the dog. You are the dog, Pierre. Do you have some sort of mental disorder? Do you have a dog? Do you have a dog? I have a dog who have a dog. You have a dog. I have a dog who have a dog. I have a dog who have a dog. You have a dog who have a dog. Maybe I did not understand the story. Maybe. Maybe. See, the story is, Pierre, that this tennis player can't have his dog. Come on, man. What are you doing? Don't make me come in there and cut you. Oh, wow. So, Pierre. Pierre. How do you feel about it? Would you like to be with your owner? No, man. I want to hang at the hotel. Okay. He is a poodle after all.
I'm going to hang at the hotel. Maybe sit around the pool. Yeah. Yep. Just order up some stuff. Yeah. I got some doggy treats coming up later. Well, thank you, Pierre. Thank you for calling, Mikey. I can't. Thank you so freaking much, Pierre. How do you respond? I would have leaned maybe toward a Frenchman's voice. Maybe. I'd have even accepted British. Yes. C. Russian. Hi, Pierre. C. I want to bring my dog. You are a dog, in fact. Oh, yeah. My dog's dog. Oh, my God. My dog have a dog. My dog. That's what he said. My dog have a dog. It's the greatest. All right. So, Sienna, Chris Brown is tired of apologizing. Yes. Now, he's been venting on Twitter. Weird. About.
About how he's been criticized and how he's overly apologizing for everything. And he said, he wrote, quote, latching on to my every word and criticizing makes you look thirsty. I can't even pee. I don't know what this word is. A bad word. Oh, okay. Go to the restroom. Without somebody complaining. Imagine how I feel. A person should not have to apologize every second for living life. Well, if you don't give them any ammo for the guns, they can't shoot you. Yeah. Maybe don't give him any ammo. He's a really bad tweeter. Do you follow him? No, I pop in from time to time because a lot of people retweet him that I follow. Really? They find the stuff he says interesting? Yeah, he's an idiot. Let's see what you think about this. Saturday night, Sienna's neighbors were having a big party. And Sienna said, first of all, thanks for the invitation. Right next door to me. Second of all...
Shouldn't you warn your closest neighbors that you're having a full-blown mariachi band until late hours of the night? You just tell your neighbors that every weekend? Sorry, guys. They were watching a movie, and every time there was a dramatic pause in the movie, they would hear the Mexican hand dance. Your neighbors are Mexican? No. They were just having a Mexican-themed party. They're, like, in their 70s. And they were throwing a party? A huge party, yeah. And you felt that a 70-year-old couple should be inviting you youngsters over? I am the neighbor. I would invite them if we were having a big bash. Do you know them? 70-year-olds? Yeah, I mean, I see that. Is this the dude that's naked in his... No. Different neighbor. Different neighbor. Yeah, we have an alley behind our house, and they're directly on the other side of the alley, so we park next to each other. See them every day.
Jay, thank you for the 20-second heads up. I'd like to give you 20 seconds when possible. Same time every day. That's it. I look down, and it's 41, and that's what the science is. This woman Michelle Bachman wants to run for president and said something that is not going to be popular with people that make minimum wage. Wait till I tell you what it is. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More coming up on FM 94.9. At Vons, we believe the standards you live by should be the ones you eat by. Honesty, integrity, and real. That's why we developed Open Nature, a new line of 100% natural foods you can only get at Vons. No added hormones, no antibiotics, no artificial ingredients. So they meet the highest standards of all. Yours.
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Bud Light Lime presents UFC 132 Cruise vs. Favor live this Saturday night only on pay-per-view. Visit UFC.com for details. Order using your Cox Remote Control by tuning to channel 501 or in HD on channel 798 after 5.30 p.m. on Saturday. Enjoy the fight. Hi, I'm Mike and I'm a CEO, a chief everything officer. My job duties include everything from business development to ordering paperclips. And with my schedule, I can't wait around for my mail and packages to be delivered. So how do I handle it all? Logistics. I'm Shawna from the UPS Store, and our mailbox services are designed for people like Mike. We'll keep your mail safe and confidential, even sign for packages. And if you like, send an email or text alert when they arrive. While I'm taking care of my clients, the UPS Store is taking care of my mail. Chief Everything Officers love logistics. With mailbox services at the UPS Store, your business gets a real street address, and we can notify you when a package arrives. To find a location near you, visit the upsstore.com. Services prices and hours vary by location. See center for details. The UPS Store is offering three months free mailbox services with an annual agreement and a real street address at participating locations. New box holders only. Visit the upsstore.com. Notary also available.
There's new, and then there's new. As in original. As in the reset button has been pressed. As in the 2011 Mercedes-Benz lineup, the youngest and freshest in the luxury car class, backed by 125 years of innovation. Consider the 2011 E-Class, with technology like Attention Assist, which can sense and alert drivers if they become drowsy. The E-Class continues to chart its own course. Ironically, one test drive reveals that all this new technology prompts an old reaction. Amazement. Lease the E350 Sport Sedan, an IHS top safety pick, for just $599 a month for 33 months with $4,369 due at signing. Only at your authorized Mercedes-Benz dealer. A new year, a new level of innovation from Mercedes-Benz. Available only to qualified customers exclusively through Mercedes-Benz Financial Services. Are participating dealers through June 30, 2011. Equipment described as optional. Call 1-800-FOR-MERCEDES for offer details. See her Mercedes-Benz dealer of San Diego County. Visit Hohen Motors in Carlsbad, Mercedes-Benz of Escondido, and Mercedes-Benz of San Diego. This is the sound of Jennifer at work preparing to visit her bank. So you want to take a two-hour lunch break? Yeah, I need to visit my bank. It's all the way across town. This is Marissa preparing to visit her nearest Chase branch. Hey, just heading over to the bank. I'll be back in 10. Well, you know they just opened one in the lobby. Oh, be back in 5. Jennifer.
You're aware this is going to come out of your vacation time. Oh. Marissa. Welcome to Chase. Wow, you guys are popping up all over the place. You can always rely on a Chase bank to be close by your home or office. With new branches opening all the time and a suite of new technologies, Chase continues to make banking more convenient. There are over 5,300 locations nationwide, with more coming to San Diego soon. Visit chase.com slash mynewbranch for your nearest Chase location. More branches in more places. Take a step forward and chase what matters. You Morgan Chase Bank N.A., member FDIC. Maybe you're addicted to crunch ice chewing a mouthful after every gulp. Perhaps you like to experiment mixing your Coke with Mountain Dew and a splash of Phantom. Shh, it's a secret. Well, no matter what your thirst demands, know you can quench it at A.M.P.M., where you'll find up to 24 flavors of fountain drinks, starting at only 99 cents for 22 ounces. Stop by and get refreshed today. AM, PM. Too much good stuff. At participating stores for a limited time while supplies last. Prices may vary. The Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm not into it. See, here's the thing too. Guy stuff. Love guy stuff. I just, it's like cars. I love cars. Lauren. I can be sweet when I want to be, but oh, I can also cut you. Oh boy. Like a knife.
Woods. Every day now I'm questioning why I have five dogs. I spent my afternoon cleaning up trash and poop. Sienna. I'm not a farter, but I live with farters. It definitely makes me laugh. And Jay. What is the coolest thing I've ever made? We don't have that kind of time. On FM 94.9. Tonight's 8 o'clock album. Telekinesis. 12 Desperate Straight Lines is the ump. Michelle Bachman running for president and says that she'd like to do what, Sienna? She'd like to reduce the federal minimum wage. Right now it's $7.25. She hasn't announced what she wants to lower it to, but she said it doesn't matter. We need to do whatever it takes. That's what we need to do for job creation. She should accept that for her salary.
Yes. That'd be great. Yeah, she also wants to cut the corporate tax rate and eliminate capital gain taxes on investments. Wow. That's one way to get votes. Yeah. Republican? Yeah. Weird. Support her, Mike. I bet. Bet. Why you got a Michelle Backman t-shirt on, Mike? Bet you on Lord, too. Rich get rich. Rich get richer. Poor get poorer. Mike gets fatter this way. That would be my platform if I ran. Also boobs. Yes, I am in favor of boobs. So sue me. All sizes. Doesn't matter. Well, it kind of matters. Mostly I like them big. I like to look. I just don't like to touch. I don't like to touch. Why would I? Looking's better. So I like to look.
I just don't like to touch. Well, I like to look and I like to touch, but I'm not allowed to touch. So for the purposes of this recording, I like to look, but I just don't like to touch. I like to look and fantasize what it would be like to touch. So in essence, I do like to look and I do like to touch. Accurate. Here's a deal. I like to touch more than I like to look. In fact, I wish I was blind and I could just walk around like I didn't see anything, grabbing random boobs all the time, being like, excuse me, excuse me. Oh, my bad. My bad. Sorry. Got to touch my way around. Yeah, just pinching around the room. We know he likes pinchers.
Sorry, I thought this was a urinal. I'm blind. I don't know. Sir, you're at Starbucks right now. You need to put that away. Sue me. Sue me. Stir your coffee. Visual. Visual. Visual. Ouch. Helicopter. Oh, no. Get it, Mike? Get it? There you go, Mike. Don't look in there, Mike. Don't look in there. Please look in there. Do not look in the helicopter. He's not going to look. He's stirring. This is stirring. This is stirring. Hey, Jay. Hey, Jay. Hey, Jay. Hey, Jay. His wife's at home listening. Like, why me? I know the helicopter. Helicopter. Helicopter. How's that? Helicopter. Helicopter. Dutch Southerner. Helicopter. Helicopter.
Helicopter, helicopter. Just moved here to Georgia from Denmark. Helicopter, helicopter. Incredible. Incredible. Have you ever had a place ruined for you because something too embarrassing went on there? Like work, maybe? Jay's there. Sorry. My bad. Starbucks. Every coffee shop. Yes. That's what we mean. You know, let's say that you went to a place and you made a big scene about something. You were angry about something. And then you don't want to go back because you're embarrassed. Like you want to go back, but you can't go back. Or maybe you hooked up with someone because you'd had too much to drink. And now you don't want to go back because you're embarrassed. And you don't want to see them. You got kicked out of a bar, maybe. You got kicked out of a bar. You don't want to go back because you're embarrassed. 570-1949. Yeah, I just call that North Park. Oh, my gosh. I just call that the whole section up there on the hill of North Park. Wow. You can read all about it in the reader. Fun area. If you like. You can just Google it. I thought we weren't supposed to talk about that. I don't care.
He makes up his own rules as he goes. That was eight months ago. Oh. Yeah, we're good now. Rules apparently change. When were we good? When we were in the process of adopting a child. So when it ended, it was a fair game. Just stands to reason. Yeah, Mike. You can talk all about it now. Yeah, have a ball. Go ahead, have a ball. Talk about my reader article. Google it, tweet it. Tweet it, whatever. Put it on the fan page. I'm freaking proud of it. I'm not proud of it. I ain't proud of it, but you can Google it. Yeah, you can Google it if you want to. Hoping to get my own Wikipedia. Kid went out one night. It was not pretty. That's the police officers. I'm sorry. It was not pretty. Hey, kid had to go all the way to the CEO of this company to get hired. Oh, my gosh. It's all right. Two months into it, I can get arrested. Two months? Three weeks. 30 days.
Holy. The night before my wedding. Three weeks. The night before. And then he goes. You told me about it at my wedding. Yeah. And then says to me, I told you about this. Yeah, I told you about it. I told you some of it. Well, first of all, you didn't tell me any of it. Yeah, I didn't. No, you didn't. No, you did not. And then he says, oh, yeah, Mike, me getting kicked out of a place and stumbling on the street and getting in a fight with a guy. Getting in a fight with a guy. The cop's taking me home. I told you about that. Good story. That's old news. And I'm like, what are you talking about? He's like, well, you'll read about it. It's coming out to read it. So, yeah, that's where I don't go. North Park. Winner. Yep. Top that. I cannot. Sienna TV, they say, affects the sleep of preschoolers. Yes. Now, there's been a lot of studies that say any TV before bedtime is not good for anyone, but especially young kids, they shouldn't be watching TV right before because it gets their brain all stimulated and they won't calm down. But especially, obviously, scary movies and stuff like that. Make sure you're showing your kids like Nickelodeon type shows. It's amazing how many kids watch adult stuff. Yeah, I remember being with a three or I can't remember. It was our friends, Erica and Todd.
and we were over at the house, and Erica and Rebecca went out, and it was me and Todd watching their kid Connor. He was probably four. We were watching this Lord of the Rings movie that had crazy, scary monsters. Yeah, that would give kids nightmares. Yeah. Not all kids, but... We all did it when we were kids. Remember, you'd watch a real scary, like The Shining, and then try to sleep. I would sneak out. I would sneak, you know, I'd go in the living room, turn the TV on, and watch scary stuff. Yeah. But... And I guess my kids are going to do that too. I don't know. But not at age four. Not at four. Not at four. I remember the first time when Poltergeist first came out. Do you remember one of the first incarnations of cable television was on TV? Does anyone remember that? And it had the dial and it sat on top. So we had it on TV and Poltergeist was on. On TV. And I remember laying in our family room with the blanket up to my chin. And I had a Walkman on. Oh, wow. And I would press play and pull the blanket over my head whenever it got too scary. Because the music and the sounds are so scary, too. And then when it was over. Yes. That was so scary. Petrifying that movie. Going to the light. I went to see Poltergeist by myself as a kid. Oh, my gosh.
I went to see it by myself as a kid. Because it was the first film to be rated PG-13. It was the very first film to be rated PG-13. And so, yeah, I went and saw that movie. Carol Ann. That's so scary. It's so good, though. Go into the light. It's so safe in the light. You know the scariest scene to me in that movie? Not what you would expect. It was not the bodies in the pool. Scariest scene to me was when that little lady came over to check out the house and she needed to find out for herself whether anything was weird in the house. And Craig T. Nelson walks up to the bedroom door and just opens the bedroom door and stuff's flying around in the room.
Yes. And then he just closes the door. I'm so streaming this tonight. And he's like, she goes, does that happen all the time? Yeah. Mostly in the day. Sometimes at night. Isn't there a scene with a tree outside the window or something? Oh my God. Yeah, because Spielberg was afraid of trees as a kid. Really? Yeah. That movie was directed by Tobey Hooper, who also did... Texas Chainsaw Massacre. It's the only two films that he's ever directed that were any good. Because he's directed other movies, too, that are terrible. But see, it's the same thing with this movie, with Poltergeist, that it is with this new movie, Super 8. It was produced by Steven Spielberg, which really means it was directed by Steven Spielberg. He's got his hand all over the head. He's a puppet. Yeah, I mean, when that happens, it's not really... directed by the person that it says that it's directed by. Which, in his case, it's a good thing. Spielberg's real good. How about the dude's face coming off? Oh, yes. Oh, God, it's all coming back to me now. It's a good movie. It's a little PTSD. Eddie Murphy said, why don't they just move out? Get out. Okay, see you guys later. Pack it up. He goes, only white people would stay in a house that long. What do you want to do? You want to hang out? Get out.
Oh, yeah. See you later. See you. And she was only three. How attached could I be to her anyway? There's leftover pizza in the fridge. Wasn't that music great? Brilliant. That's why I had the Walkman on. It's a good call. The sounds are so scary. And then the sounds cutting through the TV. Big ass TV console. That little lady, you know, she just didn't get a lot of work after that. She was in 16 Candles. That's the only other thing I can remember. She was in Teen Witch. Oh, really? Never heard of it. This room is clear. Clean. Clean, that's right. This house is clean. Oof. Whatever, Mike. I mean, these windows are done. This roof is put on. These pants are off. These. Oh, boy. On that note. I'll end it. This dong is up. What are you going to do now? Now what? Where are you going to go from there? Oh, boy. Hell, what do you got coming up? I grabbed some Bad Religion and Death Cab for Cutie. A couple bands that are coming to town because there's so many good shows this summer. I'm going to play some of those. TV on the radio, some Fugazi, which actually was a leftover request from Friday. Sorry, dude. I'll finally play it. Thanks a lot. And Desert Island Discs are going to be good today. That's at noon. It lies to her.
It tells her things that only a child can understand. Stop. I hate it, but I love it. I know. It was like hot chili. It tasted good, but it burned your mouth. All right. Lovely and talented Hillary is up next. We'll be back tomorrow morning at 6 to do this all over again. The Mikey Show's out. The Lincoln Financial Media Station. Sure, the corporate office has a say in what we do here. No beer drinking between the hours of 10 and 2. Carne asada fries only twice a week. And absolutely no European swimwear. FM 94.9. It's about the music.