The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 06/30/11

0:00Be good today. If it doesn't even start off with the marine layer, it's just nice. You look out there and you see blue. That's good. Welcome to the Mikey Show. M1 Nation. It's all yours. You can call us right now. 570-1949. M1 Nation is all about you. We love you. If you are an M1, it means you're a Mikey Show listener. You listen to the Mikey Show exclusively. You turn your radio down. You get to the point. You don't cuss. And we're welcoming back a lot of P1s. We're welcoming new listeners. We're welcoming M1s that have been with us since the beginning here at FM 94.9. And, you know, we accentuate the positive. The positive is that when you call in, you turn your radio down, you don't cuss, and you get right to the point. The positive of the Mikey Show is we don't play any music.

1:35We are a morning talk show, and that's what we do. We talk about stuff. We try to make you laugh on your way to work, and that's our deal. The other thing about this radio station is that we are not a big broadcast company. Now, I used to work for the big broadcast company, and when I was working for the big broadcast company, I defended it. I didn't have any problem with it. Well, I feel differently now because they canned me. And now that they've canned me, I have such a bad taste in my mouth for it. It's weird how that works, isn't it? Yeah, I guess. I mean, I didn't have any problem working over there. In fact, my line used to be, well, I don't have any problem. I mean, they treat me okay. And they did until, you know, the last day I worked there. But now I feel differently. I'm like, I'm kind of glad to be out of it. You know, they do a whole thing where you got to do what they say.

2:34They're very hands-on. I worked at Clear Channel in sales. And I'm sorry, the big broadcast company in sales. You can say that Clear Channel. Yeah, I know. But they do. They had their hands in the dough all the time. Like, hey, just let my dough be. Yeah. Let my dough rise on its own. Yeah. Fiddling with the dough. Yeah. Always fiddling with the dough. 570-1949 is the number. You can call us or you can text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. Word of the day is cactus. And so when you hear me say cactus, between now and 10, you'll get a four-pack of tickets to SeaWorld. They got some all-new Turtle Reef exhibit out there that Sienna's so happy about. So excited. I'm Mikey. I'm 41 now. And got a lot of gray hairs coming in the goatee. Woodsy is 35. And he's our sports guy. He's a big Yankee fan. And Lauren O'Brien is our assistant producer. She is also a comedian. She's 30 years old. Doesn't look it. Sienna, 26 years old. She's our news girl. She's a fair young lass from La Jolla. Jay is our perverted and creepy uncle. He is our producer. He is 48 years old. And our phone screener is Chris.

3:56Let's see. Okay. Live in July. Okay, so July begins tomorrow. All right? And every month or every day in the month of July that we are on the radio, we will have a live studio audience in the 9 o'clock hour. And that means you. So if you want to be a part of our live studio audience, all you have to do is go to MikeyShow.com. Get all signed up for it. You can be in every single day. You come back multiple days. As long as we have enough room, you can be here. And you can watch the show, and you can watch what we do, and you can see us do it live, and it'll be pretty awesome. M1 Veronica's on the line from Escondido. Hi, Veronica. Good morning, guys. How are you? Good. How are you doing? I'm doing better. Thank you for being so dynamic over the past year and a half. I have been putting in 10 to 12-hour days at work. Over the past week, week and a half, I've been working on weekends. So you guys give me plenty to listen to. Thank you very much. Back here at my desk. Thank you very much. Thank you all very much. I said yesterday, said off the air, you guys are funny. Make me laugh. Sometimes Woodsy says some stuff that is out of my comfort zone. Sometimes? Makes me laugh, though, and I can't help it.

5:21Lauren O'Brien. She'll get you. She'll get you. She will get you. You know what the big story is today? Chris Hansen. Chris Hansen from To Catch a Predator. He's famous for catching internet pedophiles. Just got into a little trouble himself. Now, let me just say, he's 51 years old. He lives in Connecticut with his wife, Mary. She's 53. They have two young sons. Well, he's been spending a lot more time in South Florida investigating the disappearance of James Jimmy T. Trindad. He's investigating that? Yeah, he's investigating that right now, which is why he's in South Florida. Well, let me give you a little taste of what he does for a living. Who are you? Now, so you know, they would have this actor play the role of a kid. She was actually like 21 years old. But she played the role of a kid and she was always like, there's Kool-Aid in the refrigerator. You can get some. I'm just taking clothes out of the dryer. I'll be there in a minute. I'll be there just to make yourself comfortable. You want to explain yourself? There's Chris Hansen walking into the room, hidden camera, a couple of pieces, you know, like a folder in his hand with...

6:43Printed documents from... Grab that towel right there, please. Wrap it around yourself. And please sit in that stool. What are you doing? Making a mistake. Making a mistake. I mean, I can only imagine what would have been going on in this house had I not been here. Am I wrong to think that? No, you're not. So what's going to be happening if I'm not here? You're naked. There's a 14-year-old girl. You're chasing a cat around. You've got... Cool Whip. Is that accurate? Yes. Yes, it is. I think you hit on all the points. Chasing a cat around. I guess I can't deny any of that. I do have Cool Whip. And I was. Yes, I was. I was chasing the cat. And I am nude. And I'm nude. If I could just gather my things up and go to jail now. Get the hell out of here.

7:45Well, he's now on the receiving end of Hidden Camera. He has been spotted and apparently had a relationship with a 30-year-old Florida journalist, 21 years younger than him, for the last four months. So the National Enquirer, not the most reliable source, but they're the ones behind this, set up an undercover sting operation with hidden video cameras and stuff and saw him, videotaped him with this... 30-year-old reporter, Kristen Cadell. Now, here's my policy. I don't like gossip, but I talked to Sienna about it. She said, it isn't gossip. They have it. It's news. They have them on camera. Yeah, it's all over. I mean, Fox News, everything like that. They have them on camera going into a Ritz-Carlton for a dinner date, leaving, going back to her place, her apartment, where they're carrying luggage, and then they're seen leaving at 8 a.m. the next morning. Wiener time. Right. One would think. Yes. So he was chasing the cat around as well. He was. Just waiting for that one. Just waiting on it. Poor wife. Yeah. Too bad. She apparently used to be an intern where he worked and there was, you know, she's a pretty, pretty girl. Intern bit will get you. Yeah. Funny business. Interns. They'll get you. They should all be redheaded African-American mini people. Oh my gosh.

9:09Should look like the lollipop gang. Yes. They should all be African-American little people with bright red Lucy hair. Freckles. Freckles. How about a gang of albinos? Yes, but like male albinos. Male albinos. Because if it isn't that, there's trouble. Always. I wish that cats could be intense. I wish cats could be interns, but still, there would still be somebody that would hook up with a cat. Richard Gere, gerbil. You know, Mike and I, we talked about it yesterday, that Steve Phillips, the guy from ESPN, his intern, and she was hideous. The old go-to. The old go-to, yeah. She was hideous. Well, I mean, he wasn't the only one that's hooked up with somebody that was of lower caliber. Arnold Schwarzenegger. Yes. Oh, yeah. It's a pretty good example. You know, not that it makes a difference, but... But it's just weird. Yeah. It definitely is weird. And it's definitely, you know, too bad for the poor guy's wife. Gotta live through that. Remix. There you go. Well... Kind of missed that. Well, how can you not? It gets caught in your head. I know. Chris Hansen in trouble. Padre's not in trouble. Woods in trouble. Yeah. Woods is in trouble. Yeah.

11:00Padres have now won four? Yes. Okay. If they win six in a row, Woods has to do a fryer's haircut. Now, he's grown his hair out. It's long. Jay, Jay always makes fun of me for my memory. Yep. Because I have a bad memory. Jay's got a really good memory. So, Jay, what was the bet? What happens if he loses this bet? He gets a fryer cut. And then what? For how long? Does he have to wear it? We said that he just had... I can't remember what we said, honestly. I can't either. I just set you up. I can't remember. I did set you up. I can't remember either. We have to figure it out, though. I think it was a week. Do listeners remember? I think we said for the week. I thought it was like a week. I think so. See, originally, because this morning we were talking about it. I think it's a week. It was days. It was definitely days. Yeah. Not minutes or hours. At first it was like you were going to go to a game and walk around with it too. I'll go to a game. I'll go to one game if I don't have to do it for a week and then I can shave my head. But I'll go to a game. You can't wear a baseball cap. No, I won't. I'll wear the fryer cut to the game. That's pretty fantastic. It's awesome. Will you guys concede if I go to a game? Yeah, but you can't be in like a skybox where nobody can see you. In fact, I talked to my buddy at the Padres. He goes, oh, I'm going to get you a real good seat right down where everybody can see you.

12:24We should have him dressed as a full fryer and give out Mikey Show stickers. There you go. Easy. Can I go? Of course. Of course. Yeah, you're going to have to be there and monitor me because if you don't, I may leave. I have a note of Parliament. They didn't remember either, so. No. Yeah. They didn't. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. They didn't, but we're not known for our good memory like you are. No, I'm not known for my good memory either, but. Aren't. Facts don't mean anything. Peace. The information that don't mean anything, I'm not storing them in there, according to him. Stop throwing us under the bus, Jay. Well, I'm just saying, you guys don't remember either. Your memories have never been in question. Hey, if I go down, I'm taking all y'all with me. You know that. Clearly. I'll go to a game with that ridiculous haircut, but let's all settle down. They need to still win two more games. They've won four in a row. They beat the Royals. Last night, they got their first sweep of the season. Who are they playing next? The Mariners, who just got swept by the Braves. Come on, Padres. They're traveling to Seattle to play the Mariners. And the Mariners just got swept by the Braves. The Padres are red hot. Their pitching has been dominant. They're hitting the ball. This sucks. Love those Padres. So, next game is Friday. Next game after that is Saturday. If they win those two.

13:41Monday morning. We'll be shaving the kids' heads. Well, Monday morning is a holiday. It's going to be Tuesday. It's too bad. It'll be Tuesday. Saved by the bell. Yes. Not really, though. You better hope it's a day where there's a game because if you're going to a game, you're going to have to wait until there's one. It's a good call. They're on the road, too. Yeah, so. Feast. Oh, and it's the All-Star break. Son of a. I can have this thing for two weeks. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. We'll save it. We'll save it until the season starts again. Kill me. Kill me now. Kill me now. You just set yourself up for that one. So true. Kill me now. Kill me now. MySpace sold for $35 million. Yeah, we talked about this yesterday and said that News Corp, it was alleged that they were going to be selling MySpace. Well, they did yesterday and for only $35 million. Just six years ago, News Corp bought it.

14:32Rupert Murdoch Company for $580 million. $580 million. Six years go by. Now it's $35 million. Oh my God. I know. Holy cow. I know. That's insane. What a loss. It hurts. Oh, it hurts. Huge loss. So an advertising company specific media is actually teaming up. with Justin Timberlake in this deal that still allows News Corp to retain a minority stake in the company. But Justin Timberlake apparently is going to be playing this major role in developing strategy for MySpace. Justin Timberlake is going to be turning it around. So he thinks. If he changes the name of it, he might have a chance. If he changes the name. Only chance. Yeah. Yeah. You have to change name. Or maybe he thinks, you know. That his name alone, he can keep the name MySpace and make it into something completely different. Yeah. The truth is, is that I think that he probably did a lot of research for playing that role in the movie Social Network. And he probably knows a little bit about social networking as a result. Yeah. And so he feels like he could do it.

15:41He's got some cool ideas. We talked about breaking news yesterday, a standoff in La Mesa where a guy was in there, barricaded himself in. Yeah, he was a parolee, and he was accused of threatening his wife and his 20-year-old. 20-year-old son, and he was actually arrested on Wednesday after about eight hours. This standoff was going on in La Mesa and right near Dallas Street, but it was a 59-year-old William Warnock who was the one making the threats, and he was arrested, and everyone in the neighborhood was allowed back at 7 a.m. because everyone around their house was evacuated. They didn't know what kind of weapons he had in the home. He did have three different guns, and around 6 a.m. he came out and was tasered by officers and arrested on suspicion of assault. a deadly weapon and making criminal threats. But he was threatening to kill his 20-year-old son with a large screwdriver. Oh. Yeah. What a nut. I know. This is good news for people like me that like to shop online. Apparently, here in California, if you buy something online, they can't charge you sales tax anymore. When? Starting when? Well, starting Friday, California is telling all online retailers to start collecting sales tax from customers.

16:53So it's going to get more expensive. Oh, I thought no sales tax. That's how it is right now. They're going to start collecting sales tax. They said, first sentence, shopping at Amazon is about to get more expensive. There's a first sentence in this article. And you shop at Amazon. Beginning on Friday, a new state law is going to be requiring large out-of-state retailers to collect sales taxes on purchases that their California customers make on the Internet. I know. This new tax collection requirement is part of, obviously, budget legislation and is expected to raise about $317 million a year for new state and local government revenue. Oh, my gosh. So things are going to get more pricey on Amazon, my friend. I thought, oh, wow. I know. Less. Less allowance for you now. Less. Less allowance. You're going to spend more of your allowance to get less. To get less. It sucks. That Tommy Bahama collection is really going to suffer. It's going to dwindle. It may dwindle. You'll have to look in the sales section. But I don't wear Tommy Bahama. You won't wear as much. Now you won't wear as much. It's a good point. You may have to do some bargain shopping there. I only have one shirt from there. Maybe you just go into the store instead of buying it online. Save some money. I don't buy it. You have a towel. I have a towel.

18:17You always say that because you know it gets me because I have one. I didn't buy it. It was given to me as a gift. Have you used it? Over and over and over. When you get out of the pool? I have not. Exclusively used it. I had it in my car. In case I spill anything, I need a towel. Then you brought it to be framed and put above your bed because it's a beautiful towel. And you're only, if you spill something in your car. Nothing but the best. Nothing but the best. You need your old pal TB to help you out. Loyal. Loyal friend. How dare you? A reliable friend. Why is China blocking Google Plus? We talked about Google Plus yesterday. It's going to be the Facebook. The Facebook competition? Why are they doing that? Well, China for a long time has had a problem with social networks. And so this is actually, I mean, immediately they blocked it. Everyone's blown away by the speed in which they were able to do this. But historically, China has discouraged online forums with a political tinge, they say. And they just think it's bad, all foreign social networking sites. They don't want anything to do with it.

19:28Banned Twitter, Flickr, Foursquare. I don't know what Foursquare is. It's a check-in thing. You go somewhere, you hit the button, and it says, I'm at Vons. China's banned Facebook, so it's just another one on their list. This sounds like Jay's Indian accent. Let's see what else is going on in the world. You can call 570-1949. What's up with the airline ad that's poking fun at Rod Blagojevich? Well, it's, okay, let me find it here just so I remember exactly what airline. It's Spirit Airlines, and they do these quirky marketing campaigns every once in a while. But now that Blagojevich was convicted on Monday for corruption charges, you know, selling Obama's seat on the Senate, now they have this new ad, which is, Has a picture of a big haired lookalike. Like it looks like him, but it's lookalike. And his clothes are turned into an orange prison jumpsuit. There's vertical bars over the image. And then it says, we got these fares and they're effing golden. We are guilty of selling seats, but we don't expect to serve time. And that was his quote that they had him on tape saying.

20:47Effing gold. So now Spirit Airlines is running with that for their new marketing campaign. Oh, my. I know. Spirit's a big player for the Vegas market. Are they really? Mm-hmm. 570-1949 is the number, and our text is 949Mikey at gmail.com. Everybody knows that Jay is very perfect. Thank you. Which, judging by yesterday's performance in Jay, the old man that does acting, I... tend to start to believe that. Yes. But we all know that he is perfect and I think it's time that we come to terms with it. Take a listen. The only thing written on my passport is it's me. Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Jay Isbell stories. When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone he missed three calls from me. once had a near me experience. A Japanese man can eat 17 hot dogs in 45 seconds. I can eat 45 Japanese men in 17 seconds. When a boogeyman goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet. The most perfect man in a word. Wow.

22:41Doing your own spots now real good? Man. Holy cow. New ringtone. Yeah. As it should be. Yeah. Well, the guy is perfect, you know? Yes, he is. What can I say? Thank you. Thank you. Travis Barker, you know? Drummer. Blink-182. Got into an airplane accident a while back. Burned a lot of his body. He's doing something that you would not expect him to be doing with his body. When I heard it, I flinched. It sounds so painful. The Mikey Show coming up in minutes. That was a half an inch away from being the greatest thing I've ever seen. Call Mikey now. 570-1949. Does anyone want to explain why the cab driver's in the backseat? Or shoot him a text? 949mikey at gmail.com. The Mikey Show is on FM 94.9.

24:00All year long, your car or truck faces sun, salt, road grime, and who knows what else. Everyone can see what that does to the finish. At O'Reilly Auto Parts, you'll find a tremendous selection of washes, waxes, cleaners, wipes, towels, and chamois. Today's products can protect the finish and bring the shine back to one of your favorite investments. Get the best brands at low prices with great advice from people you know at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Make your vehicle shine with great deals on select turtle wax products at your local O'Reilly Auto Parts store. Choose any two Turtle Wax products from washes to waxes to wheel cleaners and protectants for $8. Clean, shine, and protect your vehicle with Turtle Wax appearance products. Two for $8 at O'Reilly Auto Parts, the official auto parts store of NASCAR. Better parts, better prices every day. Limit supply. See store for details. It can strike at any time, and you can't see, smell, or taste it. It's carbon monoxide, a gas that can poison you if fuel-burning appliances in your home malfunction. Furnaces, water heaters, gas grills, and generators are all potential sources. CO poisoning can happen anytime, anywhere, to anyone. But prevention is quick and easy. Install a Kitta carbon monoxide alarm. A new California law requires CO alarms in most homes. It's the only safe way to detect this invisible threat. Head to the Home Depot, where you'll find a Kitta CO alarm to meet your family's needs.

25:32Kidda has been helping to protect families for more than 90 years. Each Kidda CO alarm contains the world's most accurate CO-sensing technology, and all models last seven years. That's two more years of protection, saving you time, money, and possibly a loved one. Protect your family today with a Kidda CO alarm from The Home Depot. There is a new celebration inspired by a world far, far away. Wild creatures, both real and imaginary, will be honored. Ancient arts, both magical and daring, will be performed. It's called The China Celebration at the San Diego Zoo. Come witness kung fu without getting into kung fu fight. Taste authentic Chinese food without waiting for delivery. Meet real Chinese animals born and raised in America. Purchase souvenirs actually made in China. Honor monkeys in Year of the Rabbit and lots of poo-poo. No platters. Only at The China Celebration. Celebrate the wonders of the Far East at the San Diego Zoo's China Celebration. From jaw-dropping acrobatics to wild animal encounters, it's sure to be a magical evening for all. Open nightly June 25th through September 5th. Visit sandiegozoo.org for details. And the fun doesn't have to stop when you leave the zoo. Stay connected to the animals with games and videos on our new kids' site at sandiegozoo.org. Explore today. These days, going to the dentist can be practically painless.

26:55Gee, that didn't hurt a bit. Until they hand you the bill. Because if you don't have dental insurance, you could be spending a lot of money. Even just a simple cleaning can cost over $100, and other procedures like crowns and root canals can cost you hundreds more. But now you can get dental insurance for less than a dollar a day. Real dental insurance that can cover over 300 procedures. Everything from cleanings and fillings to crowns and dentures. For free information, call Physicians Mutual Insurance Company. 1-800-600-2293. Your acceptance is guaranteed for one of these policies no matter what your situation, even if you're retired or on Medicare. Plus, you can see any dentist you choose and never have to pay a deductible. This is the pain-free way to get the dental insurance you need for less than a dollar a day. For details and your free information, call now. 1-800-600-2293. 1-800-600-2293. Chicken, chicken. We just want to make chicken. The machines want to make chicken.

28:00Robots trained to kill, but let us make chicken and we'll promise we'll chill. Chicken, we just want to make chicken. Wanna make chicken? Let us for a chain, put it in the buns, and we promise not to vaporize your little ones. Apparently, the machines really want to make chicken, but at Carl's Jr., we don't let them. Introducing the hand-breaded chicken filet sandwich, because things made by hand are better. And that's just the way it is. Only at Carl's Jr. For a limited time at participating restaurants. I'm Samantha. I'm a fresh and easy neighborhood market customer. This message is by a real customer, not a celebrity. Saving money we pass on to you. I'm always looking for savings and wanting to eat healthy foods. I feel good about no artificial colors, no artificial flavors. with the Fresh and Easy products, and it's high quality, and it's also affordable. Thanks, Fresh and Easy. Thanks, Samantha. Now everyone can save on our California-grown strawberries. Enjoy a four-pound pack for just 98 cents a pound. Open on 4th of July from 7 a.m. to 8 p.m. I call this one the barbecue. It's the barbecue of all barbecues, burgers, brocks, and dogs. And for my friends from Louisiana, we're frying up some frogs. The Coors Lights on Ice, as cold as it can be. The cooler looks like a mountain range. Blue mountains are all you see.

29:07So are we worried about the heat? Come on, son. We got Frost Brewed Refreshment. Heat zero. Coors Light one. All right. Stop. Stop. Fruit Coors Light, the world's most refreshing beer. Coors Brewing Company, Golden, Colorado. With great beer comes great responsibility. At Walmart, we're committed to low prices. Every day on everything. Including the best produce we can find. Like the blueberries here in this field. Soaking up the sun and soil. Getting sweeter by the day. So when they finally do get picked... When you take that first bite, you'll taste what peak of season is all about. Get fresh blueberries now at their peak of season. An 11-ounce package, just $2.50 at your local Walmart. Backed by our 100% freshness guarantee. If you don't love our produce, bring in your receipt for a full refund. Save money, live better. Walmart. This report is brought to you by McDonald's. 42-ounce soft drinks are only 79 cents at McDonald's for a limited time. Choose from a variety of icy cold soft drinks, and now many McDonald's are open 24 hours. Well, heading on the freeways, just a lot of slowing right now. The 163 northbound between the 5 and the 52, it's about the 30s in most spots. The 805 drive southbound between the 5, the north end and 4th street, we're seeing speeds drop into the 40s. This report brought to you by Lowe's this July 4th. You can stop by Lowe's.

30:22Buy one 16-pound bag of Kingsford charcoal. They'll give you one for free. Offer valid through July 4th. Some restrictions apply. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm a right-wing NRA guy. Lauren. Yes, I'm gullible. We get it. No, we don't. Give me a break. Woods. No, I don't play online because why? I don't like to play other people. Why? Some selfish. Sienna. You know, I really don't even know what color my hair is. It's like brown, red. There's a little bit of blonde. It changes. And Jay. You didn't use nails when you made that treehouse? Yeah, I didn't want to hurt the tree with nails going in. On FM 94.9. I love bees. Heard of this stuff I'm going to start drinking. It's called Green Superfood. You heard of that? Mm-hmm. Tastes like butt? Depends on the brand. There's a lot of different ones. I've never, let me see that one. Amazing Grass. Never had that one. Supposed to put it in juice or something. A friend of mine's done it. And he's, you know, eating more during the day, more times a day. And he's lost 30 pounds and looks great. 30. 30 pounds, dude. He looks great. And I'm going to do it. But I'm going to, you know, I'm on this whole thing now where I'm all the way in.

31:39I'm all the way in. Yeah. I'm really trying now. Good. Mike. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Travis Barker thing coming up in a minute. Word of the day's cactus. Haven't said it yet. Air horn birthdays. We're going to do that in a minute. Haven't said the word cactus. Be listening for me to work that into a sentence between now and 10 and then you'll win the tickets to SeaWorld. We got four of them for you to give away. Travis Barker from Blink 182. This blew me away. Now, maybe it shouldn't, but the guy was burnt. You know that, right? He got burnt over a majority of his body. And he got in a plane crash, fuel, jet fuel, blah, blah, blah. And listen to what he said he's going to be doing now. I actually, where I got burnt, I started finishing some of the tattoos that got burnt off. Unless the nerve endings were damaged, in which case it's fine, because then he won't feel it. But, and listen, people who have gotten tattoos, you can tell me what you think. People have asked me, what does it feel like to get a tattoo? I feel like somebody's drawing on me with a cigarette. That's what it feels like to me. If I had to describe it, it feels like somebody's drawing on me with a cigarette. Now, it's not that the cigarette is the cigarette size, but picture the cigarette in the size of like a pencil or a pen. And it feels like a cigarette drawing on you.

33:28If you've been burnt, I can't imagine doing that because it just sounds so painful. It's killing me! Yeah. But, you know, to each their own. Let's do this. Could I please speak to Christine? This is Christine. Wakey, wakey. Yay. How old are you, Christine? Do I really have to say how old I am? No. I guess that... I'm 46. Oh, it's 46 years young now. Think about it that way. It's 46 years young, my darling. What are you going to do tonight? I am going to, I don't know. It's too early for me to think about. All right, well, hang on. We'll give you a prize, all right? Okay. All right, hold on. Don't be too excited. Hair dog. Hair dog! Yes, sir. Good smart. How you doing? Pretty good, pretty good now. Can we wake you up?

36:19Well, I just woke up, yeah. Yeah, good. That's good. That's good. How old are you? Yeah, how old are you, man? Big 3-0. Wow. Welcome to the club. Milestone, man. It's a milestone. Yeah, thank you. You married? You got a girlfriend? I'm married, yeah. And what are you going to do to celebrate? Probably going to go out to the Stone Brewery. Yeah. Good choice. Good times over there. Yeah, it'll be good. Holy cow. Oh, wow. That was fantastic. Put him on. Put him on. Please. Put him on. What's that? Put him on the phone. Who's the crazy laugher? The laugher. Let me talk to the laugher. All right, hold on. That's Silent Bob or? Hello? Hey, dude. What's up? Is that your buddy? It is. You guys roommates? No. Lovers. Lovers. Are you going with him tonight to Stone Brewery? Oh, no. I did not get the invite. Oh. Just him and the wife, huh? It sounds like it. You guys work together? We do. Is he cool or is he a load? No, he's cool. Oh, that's good. A load. A load. That was the best laugh. Where'd your enthusiasm go? Dude, you had the best laugh I've ever heard in my life. Thanks, Mikey. Can I hear it again?

37:50Give me something to laugh about. Let's see. I am short and Mexican. No. That didn't do it. You got Bush. Oh, wow. All right. Well, put your buddy back on the phone. Sure thing. Thank you. Hello? Air dog. Yeah. Your buddy's a clown. That's funny. Well, happy birthday to you. Have fun tonight at Stone. Get the yakisoba. That's my... I like the yakisoba. And what I do is I will get the yakisoba with a child's portion of their mac and cheese with sausage in it. Then I mix it into the yakisoba and I add their doom sauce. And it creates and I mix it all together. And I think that they should offer it that way because it's really, really good. And everybody I've let try it loves it. You're not going to like it the next morning if you know what I mean. I get you. Yeah. Jay really likes that, though. That's what made him go. Oh, wow. All right. Thanks, man. Thank you. All right. We'll see you. Happy birthday. HPD. So some very interesting things happening in the lives of the Mikey show. There are five of us. Me, Woods, L.O.B., Sienna, and Jay. And I.

39:13really want to know what Jay's talking about here in this recap because he says that yesterday he was in the restroom. He was doing his thing and I don't even need to tell you what I mean. All I'll tell you is he was sitting. So that tells you what was going on. And he was here at the building. Now we have my son's favorite type of toilets. My son loves the auto flushers. They flush by themselves. They're automatic. Now, what happens is usually when a person stands up, they will automatically flush. Now, Jay was a little bit upset because water was splashing him. Now, why was water splashing him? He said that every time that he bent over... It would flush. I was leaning forward. It would do the auto flush every time he would bend over. Now, that's what I was wondering, Jay. What were you doing? Well. What were you? No. I mean, why would one bend over? Well, I had to reach the paper for one thing. Okay. And I also got my shoelace. Do you have T-Rex arms? No. That's the thing is. It's not like I don't use this thing every day.

40:34This is the first time. But how can you move so far from that thing? It was malfunctioning. It had to be because every time I would move, it was like a cloud. I tried to get away from the thing because it's a cloud. A cloud comes out of there and plus you're getting splashed. It's like being at a car wash. Yes, it is. A really dirty car wash. A really dirty, filthy water. I went home and showered. Has anybody ever... Flushed before standing. Yes. I have. Courtesy flush. Courtesy. But not with one of these industrial strength. No, they're industrial strength. So you can't. It's a bad idea. It'll get you. Suck you down. So this woman wrote us the other day and had a real serious question for us as guys saying that they have this really close group of friends. Adult woman, she says, you know, good jobs and everything. And they have a professional group of friends. And she goes over to their house and she said that sometimes she will do her thing there. And I thought, that is really unusual. Because I do, I mean, it doesn't matter how close I am. I would go to Wood's house. I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't partake in that at his home. You know, I just wouldn't. There wouldn't be the occasion that I would have to. And if people's answer to that would be, well.

42:03When you have to go, you have to go. Well, not really, because usually one sort of anticipates. And so they would make sure if I'm going to somebody's house, you know, I'm, you know, barrels, barrels can be empty by the time I get there. Take care of biz before you leave your house. You never know. Sometimes you do not know. Right. If you're ill. Yes. No. Sometimes you just have to go. You may get the and then you're, you know, have at it. You have to. I mean, listen, guys, we've all experienced that moment where you have to. But when you're going to somebody's house, I've just never. Well, I can't say never, but in general, I've not been to someone's home and been like, I have to go to the point where I'm willing to. Right. I mean, yeah, I've had to, but I'm not going to. I'm not going to. Oh, it just happened to me. There was a party going on in this person's house. So I went to my guy friend and I asked him. I would do that, though, Jay, because I would feel like, you know, I can get away with it. There's a lot of people. There's people. Who knows it was me? They'll stand right outside the door. Then I would never. What if you walk out and there's four girls waiting to go? No, no, no. I would never. What I would do, when I've been in situations like that, I'll wander the house and I'll look through the house and I'll find.

43:29I'd dig a hole before I'd do that with like a bunch of people. Oh, yeah. No way. The door to the bedroom is shut. I snuck into their bedroom. That's a good move. I would do that. Yeah. I would do that. Well, this person was writing us because her dilemma was it's a small home. And she said that she doesn't want to be embarrassed by the sound of because then people will really know. And she said. She was weighing that against the fact that if she didn't use that, people would assume that she didn't do anything wrong. And it would give sufficient time for things to aerate. When you did the shh, that was spray. You were spraying after you did your business. Glade. Oh, man. And that glade is loud. It is loud. Really loud. It doesn't do anything. And it just...

44:29Mixes. Hey, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. See, I'm a pupologist, okay? There are very few pupologists in the world. I am a certified pupologist. So I can speak on this topic. This is what you guys need to understand about said air freshener. Air freshener is not meant to get rid of it. Right. Okay? It's meant to mask. But there's a bit of a definition that needs to go along with the word masking, okay? What it really does is accelerate the process of said, odiferous, malodorous agents leaving the room. Extrication. Extrication, thank you. What it really does is it gets rid of it quicker, okay? It is not meant to walk in and go, did somebody just... clean some laundry in here? Because it smells like clean linen. It smells like clean linen. It smells like pine wood. Did somebody just take a Christmas tree out of this room? It's not meant to do that. What it's meant to do is work in concert with the fan so that it takes a quarter of the amount of time for somebody to be able to safely walk in there.

45:57If you didn't use said masking agent, you're not going to be able to go in there for a long time. Right. But with the masking agent, it's safe to go in within five minutes. You guys always use the fan? Yes. You don't? If there is one. You don't? No. Do you use the fan in your own home? Of course I do. You're a monster, Woods. What? I don't have the fan in my house. You don't have a fan? Yeah. Everyone's got the fan. No. I don't. You don't have the fan? My house was built in the 20s. I have a window. I don't want a fan. Window's good. We have a window. I have a window, too. Yeah, windows are good. Sienna. Yeah. What do you mean, I don't want the fan? I just don't want it. I don't need that. I don't need that. Open a window. I don't like the noise. Yeah, I don't either. It's distracting. Everyone needs a fan. What's the purpose of a fan if you're doing your business? It's not going to fan it out of there. You're not going to get rid of it. It's there, trapped.

46:58in the room with you. It's now become a roommate. It's effectively become a short-term roommate that signed a 20-minute lease. And it isn't leaving for 20 minutes. And there's nothing you can do to make it leave. First of all, fan is 100% necessary. Second of all, you have to have you have to have glee. Lysol's filthy. Lysol smells like Lysol. So no matter what fragrance it is, it always goes back to Lysol. I disagree. Kim has orange, like this orange mist. It smells like an orange. And it grabs whatever it is and sucks it out of the room somehow. Guarantee it smells like Lysol orange. Nope. Smells like an orange. L.O.B. saw three girls yesterday. Finished, so he feels like a creep. They were 10 to 12 years old. Bravo.

48:02Bravo. Chris Hansen's going to be in here. Not as hard as him. Oh, wait. Breaking the rules, Mikey. Breaking the rules. Break out the document. Let's do a little reading. So that poem you wrote. How about I owe you? How about I pay you? How about I pay you? $22. How much? $22. Mikey, you just cost yourself $22 freaking dollars. You're really going to give him $22? I'd rather do that. Then wipe it out. You didn't go fully into it. That. We have a rule that there's only a few things we can talk about. There it is. Bam! Big money. And it has to be around Christmas time. Dang it. The day after Thanksgiving. I love that. Dang it. We're not allowed to talk about the incident. So now we should just have a jar that that money goes into. Now the precedent has been set. Yes. Rules are broken. It's $22 from the offender. Yes. No. No, no, no. Because that was a genuine mistake. And, you know, like.

49:02We don't make that mistake. It's just that that's been a brand new rule that we can't mention that. But we don't make that mistake. We know not to mention the unmentionables. I don't think you even broke a rule. I did. That's his thing. We're not supposed to bring that up. You didn't delve. He brought it up. You asked for it. $22 lighter. Well, anyway, L.O.B., she saw these three girls anywhere from 10 to 12. They were holding up signs for a car wash. And she said that... They did look like kids, right? Yes. They didn't look like adults. No. But the thing that got her was the fact that to L.O.B., it was inappropriate for them to be in little tiny shorts. And she automatically was just thinking of girls and car washes and porn music behind it and just, you know, like weirdness, you know? Like, who's a 55-year-old guy that's like, yeah, yeah, wash my car? Oh, yeah. Hey, you got my attention. I saw Jay's car was really shiny this morning when I pulled up. Wheels are all clean. It is, you know. I know it was innocent. It just felt wrong. It felt so wrong. It was innocent? It was innocent. Maybe they sell brownies and cookies instead of washing clothes. Lemonade stem. Maybe they should wash cars in long pants. Maybe they do an Amish car work. Just do something different. Wear a robe. We all know. It's a stigma look.

50:23We didn't ask for it, but it happened. I'd like to see you guys do a car wash and see how it really looks. You creep. That doesn't prove any point. It would for me. I don't understand, Jay. I don't either. Seeing it and Lauren washing cars. But they're adult women, you know? They're adult women. I, too, would like to see that for the record. Thanks. It's FYI. You're not going to. Here's another weird one. Woodsy. This is so weird, man. Bark Malman. He's talking to Bark Maumann, his buddy. And apparently, last night, he's at a green light. He was waiting, though, right? Yeah, he was in a little bit of traffic, and he was late to a meeting. And he sees a guy walking across the street, pushing a grocery cart. Now, this is a homeless guy. And he's holding up traffic. So Maumann's sitting at the light, waiting to go. And nobody's going. The guy is wearing a No. 7 Bark Maumann...

51:27flag football jersey that bark had thrown away no way one in a million one in a million he got it through his trash he went through his trash it was right by his house and he had this he worked at a radio station in austin and he had this flag football you know since college 20 years right yeah and he's like finally i gotta get rid of this thing i'm hanging on to the past i'm cleaning out the closet right throws it out a big bag of clothes well this guy walked by and was like yeah i'll take that grabbed it, put it on, and I guess he's around the neighborhood. He goes, dude, my heart started to flutter. He was going to turn around, but he was super late for a meeting. He wanted to take a picture. Just so that he could see that somebody else was in his shirt. It said Bauman 7 on the back and on the front. It said KLBJ. Wow. He had his jersey on. That's pretty outrageous. What are the odds? We used to always turn... do a thing with the radio station. We'd get shirts from our radio station and we'd exchange from other radio station shirts and then we'd go donate those shirts to the homeless. So then you'd always see your competition in homeless guys. That's mean. That is mean. Because I like to clothe the homeless. Yes, I too am a fan of clothing homeless. Sometimes, you guys, this is kind of a good one.

52:47He better not skate away with that one. Oh, my God. There's a thing that my friends used to do where we would like to walk up behind old ladies and push them as hard as we could. Sometimes my buddies would, you know, if there was an old woman just standing there, my buddies would get behind her on all fours. Then I'd come up and shove the old woman. She'd fall over them. And then we would just laugh and laugh and laugh. Sometimes we'd steal the purses, too, and just run away with it. I get real excited when I see a baby in a stroller because I can approach it from behind, doesn't know I'm coming, and I just take the bottle. Yeah, take the bottle. Or the candy. Candy. I'll take the candy. You want to know why? It's so easy. Like taking candy from a baby. It's like taking candy from a baby. They're right. That was going to be on my next show meeting ideas. 5701949 is our number, and this is weird. We're going to do some TomTom tunes, so we need you to call us for that. 5701949. And we'll tell you what's going on with that. And then, how many times do you think that guys wear their underwear? We got a statistic for you. Actually,

54:14Sienna's got a few statistics on this. Hilarious. Mikey Show coming up in minutes. Pop quiz, hot shot. There's a brick heading for your n**** at 50 miles per hour. What do you do? Call Mikey now. 570-1949. What do you do? Or shoot him a text. 949Mikey at gmail.com. The Mikey Show is on FM 94.9. This 4th of July weekend just became the best time to trade for a fuel-efficient Ford. The San Diego Cellathon is going on now. Today through July PIP, get an extra $1,000 bonus when you trade in any qualified maker model and keep all rebates. Trade for a new F-150 SuperCrew this weekend, and you'll get total savings up to $5,500. The $1,000 bonus is also available when you trade for a new Mustang, Taurus, Escape, Flex, Fusion, Expedition, Super Duty, or Ranger. Log on to SanDiegoCountyFord.com for the model and the deal that's right for you.

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56:39The Ultimate Fighting Championship presents UFC 132, Cruz vs. Faber. Phantomweight Champion Dominic Cruz will attempt to avenge the only loss of his career in a rematch against former WEC featherweight champion, the California kid, Uriah Faber. Also, former Pride middleweight champion, Vanderlei Silva, battles four-time knockout of the night winner, Chris the Crippler. Plus, the Huntington Beach bad boy, Tito Ortiz, will go to war with one of the most powerful fighters in the division. Ryan Bader. Tito says, let's fight. And the natural-born killer, Carlos Condit, is set to take on undefeated welterweight powerhouse Dong-Yan Kim. Bud Light Lime presents UFC 132 Cruise vs. Faber. Live this Saturday night, only on pay-per-view. Visit UFC.com for details. Order using your Cox remote control by tuning to channel 501 or in HD on channel 798 after 5.30 p.m. on Saturday. Enjoy the fight. How to go on a tropical vacation without going to the tropics. Step one, go to McDonald's and order a new McCafe mango pineapple real fruit smoothie made with low-fat yogurt starting at $2.39. Welcome to McDonald's. Hi, I'd like a mango pineapple smoothie. Step two, lay in a hammock. If your car doesn't have a hammock, pull over and lay the seat back. Step three, roll down all the windows and turn on the radio. Ah, there it is, man. Step four.

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1:00:29Don't miss the next debut edition of San Diego Insider Magazine, 6 p.m. Sunday, exclusively on Channel 4, San Diego. It's time to celebrate. Sportual A's 4th of July sale is going on right now. You'll find great deals throughout the entire store. Save big when you take an additional 50% off already reduced men's, women's, and kids' clothing and shoes. Take an additional 25% to 50% off already reduced clearance, bikes, fitness, camping, fishing gear, and so much more. Plus, you can take 25% off select regularly priced gear, clothing, and shoes. This is something you don't want to miss. Strengthen America's independence at Bobstall Chevrolet in La Mesa, where the hottest, best mileage American cars and trucks are on sale today. This 4th of July, make your new car or truck one of America's best. You'll find acres of Chevrolets on sale only at Bobstall Chevrolet's independent sale in La Mesa. And bring your import to Bobstall, and you'll find out how one of America's best high mileage cars or trucks can be yours today.

1:01:27So declare your independence, trade your import for any of America's best high-mileage cars or trucks, and get a premium at Bobstall Chevrolet's independent celebration. At Vons, you can count on low prices. With amazing Vons Club specials and everyday low prices, you can get what you want, when you want it, at the price you need. That's their promise. That's ingredients for life. Vons. This report, it's brought to you by McDonald's. 42-ounce soft drinks are only 79 cents at McDonald's for a limited time. Choose from a variety of icy cold soft drinks. Now many McDonald's are open 24 hours. Well, it looks like we got a problem here in Bonita on the 805 northbound right after Bonita Road. It's a disabled car in the center divider. National City pretty slow this morning on the 805 northbound between Plaza Boulevard and Imperial Avenue. That drive on the 163 northbound between the 5 and the 52 is going to take you a little time. dropped into the 30s. This report also brought to you by Lowe's this July 4th. You can stop by Lowe's, buy one 16-pound bag of Kingsford charcoal. They will give you one for free. That offer is valid through July 4th. Some restrictions do apply. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9.

1:02:44Your boy gets in the shower, and I have very little hair, and I have to condition, of course, because it smells so good and it feels so good when you condition. Deanna. Yes, I have big boobs. And Jay. So what if I like to surf every day? On FM 94.9. Pretty heavy stuff going on in the Kaylee Anthony trial right now. On the stand, they have the woman that allegedly George Anthony had an affair with, and allegedly George Anthony told this woman. With his cry. That George Anthony told her that the death of Kaylee was an accident that spiraled out of control. Crazy. Which means that he did it like the defense is saying. She's backing that up and it just got spicy in that courtroom. She can answer the question. I'm sorry? Did you tell the police that he knew that it was an accident that snowballed out of control? That's correct. That is...

1:04:14And after he left your house that day, he made further appearances asking for people to look for his live granddaughter. Of cross. Sistine. No further questions. I got the statement back. I think that was her. She's like crying practically. She's crying. Oh, okay. Sistine, ask your question, Mr. Ashton. Sure. In the statement, you said he didn't say that like he said, like he knew. That is what you said? Yes, that's exactly what I said. And that is what you intended to say? Yes. Thank you. You might be tense in that courtroom today, man. They think the defense is going to rest today. It may be the last day for the defense, and they're done. And to make things real tense, now the prosecution gets their last shot, they get to get back up, do their thing, and then they're done. And they give their closing statements, it's over.

1:05:29One of the things that was a bombshell during this trial was Cindy Anthony, Casey's mom, getting up on the stand saying, oh, yeah, it was me that looked for chlorophyll, which led me to look for chloroform. And the prosecution is like, what? Really? Because our records show that on the days that these searches were made, you were at work. And she said, well, you know, I'm on salary. And so I get off at different times and I can go home and blah, blah, blah. And they said, isn't there some sort of record of that? She said, no, because they don't keep that. I worked there a long time ago. They don't keep those records. They don't keep any of that information, blah, blah, blah. Well, the prosecution just gave a list of the people that they're going to be calling up when they get their next shot. And those people include her old boss, the head of IT, and the HR director. Ouch.

1:06:34Do you think she's crapping her pants? Yeah, all the IT guy would have to do, Mike, is just show, because they'll have records of emails sent. If there's an email sent from her computer at the time she's supposedly home doing Google searches, she's toast. Toast. And those guys have that stuff to a T. Now, that's like perjury. That's flat-out perjury. You're a liar. My wife said yesterday that she doesn't think that they would prosecute her. And I go, why? She goes, because the state has to decide if they want to prosecute. Right. She goes, I don't think they would. I'm like, holy cow, that's a felony crime. If they get Casey, they probably won't. I would imagine if they get Casey, if they don't, I bet you they do. My goodness. I told my wife last night a bold statement. I said, Casey Anthony is going to walk. I said they had more evidence on OJ. They did. They had five times as much evidence on OJ. Yeah. Even though it's clear. Yeah. It's clear. Yeah. I think she will do some time for child neglect, something of that nature. Right. But I don't think murder or murder won. Yeah. Yesterday was a very interesting day in the Casey Anthony trial. They had a person that was a expert on grief. And in trying to figure out if the person is an expert, you get to ask a couple of questions too.

1:08:01Make sure that the person's an expert. So he's asking her these questions. He's like, and I've seen them do this. Whenever they have a person up there, they get a chance to ask questions. And then they either object to them being an expert or they say, yeah, you know, they're an expert. And the one thing that's been consistent is, have you ever written in any peer reviewed journals? And all of these experts, not only have they written in peer reviewed journals, they've written in dozens and dozens. So he says, you ever written any peer reviewed journals? And she says, yes. How many? About half a dozen. Can you name them? Yes. I wrote for a website called blah, blah. No, no, no, no, no. That's a website. He's a bulldog. That prosecutor. He goes, no, that's a website. That's not a journal. He said, she goes, I also did a chapter in the book grieving with. And he goes, no, excuse me. do you know what a peer-reviewed journal is? And she goes, yes, I do. And he goes, you just said that you wrote a chapter in a book? Yes, I wrote an article and my peers could see the article. No, no, no, ma'am. That's not a peer-reviewed journal. That's you writing an article that was put into a book. Okay, I also did da-da-da-da-da. And she didn't write for one.

1:09:29freaking peer-reviewed journal so he goes through all of this and he says i object to her being an expert the judge says overruled and she gives this smirk yeah she gives a smirk to the prosecutor like ha ha and they and so you know the defense gets to ask her all these questions well then that dude gets to get up and have his hands at her and he goes you know it's just it's really interesting you You say that it's perfectly and she's working for the defense. You say it's perfectly reasonable that a woman would be 22 years old and that if she was going through grief, she would be out drinking. Is that right? Yes, it is. And now she's got smart aleck in her voice, right? Yes, it is. And you also said that it would be consistent for somebody to be very quiet and very...

1:10:29inward and not to do anything. Yes, it is. So let me understand this correctly. Would it be consistent with somebody to be promiscuous if they were going through grief? Yes, I've seen that. Would it be consistent with somebody having grief to not be promiscuous? Yes, I've seen that. Let me ask you a question. What doesn't qualify for consistent behavior with somebody going through grief and she got this smile on her face like oh you think you're so smart but she couldn't answer it and he goes so basically what you're saying is that anything can happen and that's consistent with grief and Rebecca was like yeah you can basically put a screwdriver in your eye yeah that's consistent you tie your shoes a lot yeah you could have an affair with your wife's best friend that's normal I've seen it yes

1:11:33What about jumping up and down nude with a Lucille Ball wig? Yes, I've seen that. Oh, yeah. Yes. Big player. Big player in the grief community. It was fantastic yesterday. I'm Mikey. That's Woodsy. That's L.O.B. That is Sienna. Jay is our producer. And our phone screener is Chris. That's crap. That's crap. That's crap. Word of the day is cactus. Haven't said it yet when I do. Four tickets to SeaWorld. Sienna, what is this Clorox bleach survey that just got released? They just released the results of a nationwide survey which found a few kind of disturbing things. One in eight men wear their underwear at least twice before they wash it. That is filthy. One in eight men wear their underwear at least twice before they wash it. Woods just gave the shrug that said, talk to me. Okay. Sometimes if I wear my jeans to work, I go home, grab a nap. Don't wear underwear with my jeans. So I'll put a pair of boxers on, take my nap, might wear those boxers the next day. Boxers, not brief. So I wear them half a day on Monday, say, and then half a day on Tuesday. So it's like 24 hours.

1:12:59Does that make sense? Yes, it does. Okay. It does. Is it hideous? No, but no. No, it isn't hideous. Okay. It's so far out of the realm of anything that I would ever do, but it isn't hideous. Okay. Okay? But I wish that I could, for medically seal all underwear, and that all underwear could be for medically sealed, clean, and that a new package could be opened every single time. I am very, my underwear are clean. You're like single women because it says single women are more than twice as likely as married women to buy clothes to avoid laundry. I share a lot. I share a lot in common with single women. So when you washed your own underwear, was it that clean or now that you don't wash your underwear? Absolutely. I have an overflux. Rebecca will call you right now and tell you. I have an overflux of underwear. Ditto. I own many. How many pairs would you say? 20. I have probably 25 pairs of boxer shorts. Yes. They stick. You can't close the drawer. Why not just throw a freshie on them? Just because I'm like, you know, I wore them for a nap. It's wasteful. You know, and I just. Does it, is there something about it that strikes you as comfy or pleasing? Yeah, they're kind of comfy, you know, because they're a little rough when you take them right out of the drawer, you know, because they haven't been.

1:14:26broken in yet and they get a little broken in. I wouldn't wear them more than that. Makes sense. If you wear boxers, I don't. Yeah, it's different. I think boxers are different because they're not up against the stuff really. I only have two pair of underwear. You know why, Mike? That's so gross. You want to know why? Commando. Because I'm like Rambo. You think Rambo wore underwear? He didn't. He's out surviving. You think Chuck Norris wore underwear? Mike, he didn't. Alright? I'm my own brigade. That's right. I am a one-man platoon. Just slows me down. That's right. I'm a ballless wonder. Just an extra layer that Kim has to take off. Kim sat me down one time, and she said, darling, it takes too long. I need you, and I need you as quick as I can get you. When I want it, I want to get it. All right? When I got a hankering for Jay, I got a hankering for Jay. And I need it. And I need it. And I need it.

1:15:30now. I need to quit. I'm so sorry, Kim. Yeah, me too, Kim. Now you're doing Kim's voice. Now you're doing Kim's voice, but it sounds a lot like my voice, which is weird. Take him off. Nah! She's not even from Texas. I have a couple more for you guys. An average man wears jeans at least four or five times before washing them. Yeah. Supposed to. That's fine with me. You're supposed to. You're not supposed to wash them a bunch. I told you that the guy at Nordstrom told me that you shouldn't wash jeans at all. Yeah. You should put them in the freezer. What? That's what she said. It was a girl. She said, you shouldn't wash them. You should put them in the freezer and they clean. Oh, I like it. That's strange. I'm going to do it. Do you do it? No. You've never done it? I'm going to do it. No. Do you guys know what I do every morning? I wear my jeans. I'll wear my jeans a few days in a row. I take them into the laundry room. I spray them with wrinkle-free, with wrinkle spray. Yeah. And I put them in the dryer on touch-up every day. Yeah. It's a good bit. It's a good bit because then they seem fresh and nice. Warm. We can get them out. Yeah. About half of men use the sniff test to figure out if their clothes are fresh enough to wear again without washing. Filther. I believe that. That's good. L.O.B., do you wear jeans more than once a day?

1:16:51More than once a day? Yeah. I mean, more than, yeah, do you wear jeans the next day? Yeah. Same pair? Uh-huh. You do? I'll go like three, probably like three times. Doesn't bother me with a girl at all. Doesn't seem weird. They get too stretched out after that. They do. They do. But if a girl, like a guy, wore underwear for how many days? Ugh. I can't even find it now. Whatever it is. No, it says one out of eight men wear their underwear at least twice before washing it. Yeah, that would... I'd fly out of America. Move to Canada. No, it says women own way more than 20 pairs of underwear, usually. You may think with songs you're super. You recognize them right away. They're never quite the same. The lyrics are read by directions anywhere in the world. But now she's gonna reverse. Let's see. Tom Tom Girl is an actual Tom Tom device. And Tom Tom Girl, there's generally a theme. Sometimes there's a theme that's working, right? That's the new bit, Mikey. Yeah. And what you do is you will give the lyrics to a song. The person will have 20 seconds to listen to those lyrics and give us either the title or the artist to win. What can they win today, Jay? They're going to get a $40 gift card or free games at Dave and Busters. How about that? $40 at Dave and Busters.

1:18:29and busters. First up is M1 Mike from Escondido. Are you ready, Mike? Alright, 20 seconds starting now. Seems like just yesterday you were a part of me. I used to stand so tall. I used to be so strong. Your arms around me tight. Everything it felt so right. Unbreakable like nothing could go wrong. Now I cannot breathe. No, I cannot sleep. I am barely hanging on. I only need the title of the song or the artist of the song in order for you to win, Mike. All right. Let's see. Kelly Clarkson. Yes! Wow. That is right. Oh, my gosh. There was no... I had my finger on the... Because I was like, there's no way. Wow. Dude. You just got 40 bucks to Dave and Buster's. Sweet. Hang on the line. Sure, sweet. Unbreakable like nothing could be. What did he say? He said, you sure are sweet. How do you know that song? It's a great song. Sorry, sorry, sorry. It is good. M1 all caps from IB. Hey, Mikey. It's a guilty pleasure, all right? Woods admitted the other day that there was a Kelly Clarkson song he liked. Since you've been gone. Tom Tom Girl, I'm sure you heard more than just since you've been gone.

1:20:03in Woods' car when you were in his... Correct, Mikey. Which ones did he like? He likes the entire American Idol catalog. Because he is the American Idol. Justin Guarini is a big player. He would play Justin Guarini. Justin and Kelly. Yeah, their movie. He had it on DVD. From Justin to Kelly. With love. I've seen it. All right. M1, all caps. You got 20 seconds to listen to TomTomGirl and come up with the answer to this. Blue eyes, baby has got blue eyes. When the morning comes, I will be far away. And I say blue eyes, holding back the tears, holding back the pain. Baby has got blue eyes and she is alone again. Blue eyes, baby has got blue eyes. Like a clear blue sky watching over me. M1 all caps. Do you have any idea? Do you have a title or artist on that one? It's kind of tough. Elton John. That's right, buddy. Oh, yes, it was. Wasn't it? That is what you call a gimme. That was. That was a gimme. Hang on the line, buddy. 40 bucks, Dave and Busters. I've been following.

1:21:27Oh, yeah, Elton. You swooner. Just crooning, man. Yes, that's... He recorded this in the nude. Little known fact. He was singing to a guy named Chip. Actually. He was sitting on his piano cross-legged. FYI. FYI. at a 45 degree angle because the grand piano was open with the stick holding it open. So the guy was sitting at a 45 degree angle. Yes. Which is weird. Uncomfortable. M1 Luke from San Diego. You there? I'm here. All right, Luke. 20 seconds to listen to Tom Tom Girl. There is a theme working today. Be listening. Title or artist. 20 seconds. Here we go. Hey, where did we go? Days when the rains came. Down in the hollow. Playing a new game. Laughing and a running. Hey, hey. Skipping and a jumping. In the misty morning fog with our hearts. A thumping. And you. Can you give me title or artist on that one, Luke? Man. I got nothing. Think of the theme. Think of the theme. Wow, night girl, dude. Hey, it's ringtone. Is it really?

1:22:47It sure is. It should be every mom's ringtone. Mom, your phone. Mom, answer the phone, please, because we're in the store. Mom. Mom, get this. Will you get this? Is it my purse? I know it's Aunt Debbie calling. Can you pick it up? I think it's in the bottom of my purse. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just get it. Just get it. Just get it. Just get it. Wear my glasses. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Grab it. I like. It's the best. 570-1949 is the number. I forgot news and sports and want to know what's going on. So, Sienna, what's going on in news? Well, the first season of The Voice is now over. Javier Colon actually won. He beat out DF Frampton. Have you been watching The Voice that whole night? The DF and Frampton. Oh, DF Frampton didn't win. That's too bad. No, the votes were so close. It was only a 2% separation. And so Javier took home a $100,000 prize in a recording contract. This one is for you. Low dose CT screening scans of current and former smokers cut lung cancer deaths by 20% compared to the chest x-rays. Cool. Maybe you'll get one of those. Do you want to hear Javier Colon sing with Stevie Nicks last night? Sounds like a pitcher for a major league baseball team. For sure. Oh. Is that Stevie?

1:24:19Climbed the mountain and I turned around. She sounds pretty good. I saw my reflection. Snow-covered years. Hasn't even lost a step. Mikey. That's Javier Cuomo. Don't you know that? Color me embarrassed. Little Angela. Oh. Hello. Singing from the cauldron on that one, man. Uh-oh. She's singing from the inside of a genie lamp, and you're hearing the noise that's coming out of the top of it. It sounds so compressed. It does.

1:25:24Maybe it's about my life. Maybe it's about cocaine. Maybe it's about my dad. I don't know. I don't remember. Cover it, everyone. Go ahead. You think she walks off stage and she's like, Bernie, how many times with that set list? She sounds so boring. I'm so over it. I don't want to do it anymore. You have to do it, Stevie. We can't not have you do it. It's landslide. I don't care. I'm so over it. Well, Gypsy, does anyone like Gypsy? How about Rhiannon? Fun. Let's do some of the B-sides.

1:26:10Woodsy, what's going on in sports? I told you earlier. Oh, first of all, sports is brought to you by our friends at Frank's Red Hot. Frank's Red Hot. Get some! I told you earlier, the Padres have won four. Yes, four in a row. They had their first sweep against the Royals of the season. Now they are heading to Seattle, where they'll be taking on the Mariners. It's Friday, 7, 10 p.m. at Safeco Field. Dustin Mosley against Jason Vargas. And a very interesting story in Sports Illustrated coming out. It's an oral history of the movie Major League, which is one of my favorite movies of all time. One of the best characters. And it was played by Charlie Sheen. Charlie Sheen. Charlie Sheen is now admitted to taking steroids for the role of Wild Thing. Said it took his fastball from 79 miles an hour to 85 miles an hour. Did it. And he did it for the role. Said he did it for about six to eight weeks. Boy. Jealous. Fucking clown. Yep. Listen to this. This is just for you. Oh, wow. Oh, gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, gosh. I didn't realize. I don't know why I didn't realize. Just keep rolling. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. A little. Yeah. The words in your mouth. I love it. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Why don't you tell him the whole story? Time to wake up, sir. Call 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. Shut up.

1:27:44More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. When did it become okay to make products designed to be used once and then thrown away? When did everybody come to accept the idea that a thousand disposable products were just as good as a single one built to last? When did quantity replace quality? At Jeep, we believe that every new Grand Cherokee that rolls off our line should last. And so we made it that way. From the hand-stitched leather on the steering wheel, to the 5,400 welds in the body. Every part of this car has been designed, engineered, and built to last. That's what we believe at Jeep. The things we make, make us. Jeep is a registered trademark of Chrysler Group, LLC. Lease Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo 4x2 for $2.99 a month for 39 months with $24.99 due at least signing for well-qualified current lessees of competitive vehicles. Tax, title, and license extra. Call 1-888-925-G for lease details. Offer requires a dealer contribution to lease to Ally. Residency restrictions apply. Must take retail delivery by 7511. Hi, gang. It's your old pal Woodsy for Denny's Tour of America. It's a new limited time menu offered until August 29th. So you got a little time left, but don't.

1:29:02Wait, man, get in there and try their six new celebrated dishes from the Midwestern and Southern states, as well as dishes from Philly, California, and Hawaii. Feast on all of it. You won't be disappointed. The new Midwestern meat and potato sandwich, the Philly cheesesteak omelet, the Hawaiian tropical pancakes, the Georgia peach French toast, Southern shrimp and grits. Florida orange milkshake, Pacific Northwest iced coffee, and the Hawaiian tropical smoothie. Perfect for my favorite Tommy Bahama fan, Michael R. Esparza. Denny's Tour of America is available all day, every day for unlimited time only with dishes starting at $4.99. It is Denny's Tour of America. Since the launch of the new HTC Inspire 4G from AT&T, people everywhere are having what can only be described as aha moments. It's as if little light bulbs... are turning on over people's heads all around town. Eyes are widening with excitement, faces lighting up with joy. Some are experiencing these aha moments while watching HD movies on the Inspire 4G's glorious 4.3-inch screen. Some aha moments are coming after shooting incredible HD video and uploading it to share with family and friends. And others while perusing the thousands of Android apps. You see, life is filled with aha moments. The HTC Inspire 4G just helps people get them a whole lot faster.

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1:32:45As in the 2011 Mercedes-Benz lineup, the youngest and freshest in the luxury car class, backed by 125 years of innovation. Consider the 2011 E-Class, with technology like Attention Assist, which can sense and alert drivers if they become drowsy. The E-Class continues to chart its own course. Ironically, one test drive reveals that all this new technology prompts an old reaction. Amazement. Lease the E350 Sport Sedan, an IHS top safety pick, for just $599 a month for 33 months with $4,369 due at signing. Only at your authorized Mercedes-Benz dealer. A new year, a new level of innovation from Mercedes-Benz. Available only to qualified customers exclusively through Mercedes-Benz Financial Services or participating dealers through June 30, 2011. Equipment described as optional. Call 1-800-FOR-MERCEDES for offer details. See your Mercedes-Benz dealer of San Diego County. Visit Hohen Motors in Carlsbad, Mercedes-Benz of Escondido, and Mercedes-Benz of San Diego. Hear the Authentic Surf Report daily at 7.30 a.m., 2.15 p.m., and 8.15 p.m. on FM 94.9. Supported by Frost Brewed Coors Light, the world's most refreshing beer. This report is brought to you by Allstate.

1:33:54The 4th of July holiday, one of the most dangerous on the road. So before you head out to celebrate, put yourself in good hands. Dollar for dollar, nobody protects you like Allstate. 15 southbound before SeaWorld Drive, we've got a car stuck in the center divider. Also the 15 southbound before Poway Road, an injury accident here. Motorcycle and an SUV, they're in the number one lane. They do have an ambulance on the scene. And the westbound, the ramp to the 67, there's some kind of unidentified object that's in the center lane. This report brought to you by McDonald's, 42-ounce soft drinks. Only 79 cents at McDonald's for a limited time. Choose from a variety of icy cold drinks. Now many McDonald's are open 24 hours. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Good morning to you. This is Burr, Burr Sershead with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Thursday morning. Brought to you once again by Frost Brewed Coors Light. When the mountains turn blue, it's as cold as the Rockies and ready to drink. Coors Brewing Company, Gold in Colorado. Surf-wide today, smaller and a little weaker, a little bleaker, but still some waves to be had. Southwest swell continues to taper off. Some wind swell remaining from yesterday's strong blow and from some other sources, too. Waves are running down in that need-of-waist-high range on average. Up at chest height, standout combo spots. Maybe a rare plus on top of that. Before a tide gets too high, it starts to smother things. Beach break's definitely the better call. Kind of broke it up in shifty little peaks. Some stand-up corners, again, on the best of the setways.

1:35:25Partly cloudy skies today, I'm seeing some early blue, which bodes for a nice day ahead of us. Be aware that water temperature is likely to take a hit, though. We've had that wind swell churning up over yesterday. I can drop that water temperature down by 2 or 3 degrees real quickly, so pay attention to that before you head on out. For up-to-the-minute surf reports and forecasts, go to surfline.com, and the authentic surf report can only be heard three times daily, right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. And I wear like a 44 small. Lauren. I'm a lyricist. Woods. I mean, hey, listen, I'd do snuff on the plane, okay? Zienna. I put my head down because if I hear someone cry, I cry. And Jay. You'd have to be dying not to come down and help you. Yeah. I would have to have had my arm chopped off. On FM 94.9. It's always apocalypse now. And it will never not be. It's always apocalypse now. Surfing. Skiing. Down the Nung River. So.

1:37:35This email says, Mikey, I had my dog with me at the park and a bunch of kids were playing with him. And his rocket came out. One of the mothers looked at me in disgust and said, oh, I think doggy time's over and gave me a look. Like it was my fault. Or I was some kind of pervert. She should grow up and not make me walk away, right? M1 Billy. Indoors, different. Outdoors, I... Indoors, you go, hey. You know, to the animal. I don't know why. I don't know why. Hey, you with that. Now. Put that up. Don't. Don't. But outside, I don't know why. It seems different to me. Outside, if the rocket's there, it's... We're in the dog park. Give me a break. Let the guy be. You can still tell him to... You need to do something. You can't just let it chill like that in front of the kids. Why? Well, they know.

1:38:39Most kids probably have one. Yeah. She shouldn't be a bee about it. It's not his fault. It's a dog. It's not like he's showing doggy porn or something like a doggy porn magazine. It's a dog. But it's his dog and it's kind of gross. I don't want to be petting someone's dog and have that come out. I'm going to be like, ew. Why? Because it's gross. Honestly, Woods, would you think about it? No. I wouldn't even think about it. Nor would I. Oh, I would think about it. I would tell him, you know. Come on. Like, big. Oh. Depends on the dog. I got little dogs. Yeah, but they're, I mean, they can get pretty big to where a kid's like, ah. Saw my dog in the backyard and I was like, oh my gosh, what are you doing? I don't think that's scarring kids. No. It's going to scar them, but it's going to bring up questions to like a three-year-old that, what's that, mom? It's his wee-wee. It's his wee-wee. It's his pee-pee. Who hasn't seen it? Yeah. The lipstick? It's his pee-pee.

1:39:36It's kind of true. You never heard the lipstick? Yeah, I have. But it's just so strange. I just wonder why. My dog gets embarrassed. He gets caught because I'll look out there and he's having a good time. And I'll go, hey! And he'll go, I don't know what you're talking about. It wasn't me doing anything. Hey, Woodsy. Yeah. You mind if I read an email from you that has to do with dogs? Sure. I woke up this morning and read this. Hey, bro, just wanted to let you know that Sonny, Sonny's his dog, Senior Beans? Yes. Hey, bro, just wanted to let you know that Sonny's been up all night throwing up. I haven't really slept much. What's the protocol on something like this? SW. What is Mike a vet? Yeah, I know what he's trying to do. I think I do too, but I think that Jay answered that perfectly. Uh-huh. I don't know, Woods. I'm not a veterinarian, and so I, you know.

1:40:51Woods is looking at me right now like we're really going to read this on the air. This is what we're going to do? Well, here's the thing. I feel bad for Sonny because Sonny's sick. Do you? Yes, I do. Do? I really do, Woodsy. You. I really do. I'm being serious. But were you or were you not seeing if I would say, why don't you take it to the house? No. You were not. No. Okay. That look that you have right now says absolutely I was. However. Yes. What if Jasper or Sage. Yes. Or Luke. Yes. Or Ryan. Right. Were sick. They were throwing up all night. You didn't sleep. Right. Oh, my gosh. Well, hang on a minute. Now, I would have Rebecca take care of it. Right. But if I got a note or an email from Jay.

1:41:52or Sienna, I would tell them to take it to the house. I don't have a backup plan. I didn't either. Jamie works too. It's a dog, Woods. Yeah, I know it's a dog. You know, go ahead. No, you go ahead. You go. Woodsy, I know that you love Sonny a lot. I think we all do. Do we? I do. I do. I do. Came to my house. Yep. Jay doesn't, but we all do. I know. Just a dog. I break his neck. Put him out of his misery. Woods. Yes. Is there any part of you at all that thinks that it's odd that you wanted to take a day off? I didn't. You did. I didn't. You did a little bit. No. I'm tired, though. I was up. It was like being up with a newborn. Really? Yeah. You holding his head over the toilet. Holding his hair back. Yeah.

1:42:54No, but I was sucking him in. I was wiping up vomit and then loving on him, and then he'd vomit in the bed. Why'd you put him outside? Oh, wow. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Oh, no, no, no, no. Jay, Jay, Jay. Put him outside with a little bed. Yeah, he weighs all of about two pounds. Yes. And he got into something, and I don't know what. Why didn't you put him in a teacup? Or your purse. Why didn't you put him back in your purse? Because that way... Yeah, it's over the line. Okay, maybe it was a little over the line. Part of me wishes, and this is just me being honest. This is an honest cap. I wish that maybe you had written me back. Well, written me back, period. But written me back and said, maybe you bring the little guy in. So you can keep your eyes on him. Great. That would have been nice, I think. Oh my gosh. It's not too much to ask. He's not going to. I want everybody to know that's listening right now. And this is as absolutely stone cold serious as I can be. I know the man across from me and he's not kidding. Not one bit. I can see it in his face and I can see it in his eyes. He's not kidding. Of course he's not. He's obsessed.

1:44:18We work on the seventh floor of a professional business office. Oh, my God. Right. This is a place of business. Yes. I mean, it's also a place of business where we eat donuts off toilets. True. It's also a place of business where we light things on fire. We make potato guns. Okay. It's a place of business where there's a giant piñata hanging behind you as we speak. Touche. Now. Yes. To my piñata's defense. Sienna has never asked if she could bring a sick sage to work. Right, because a sick baby can actually get everybody else sick. That's because it's a human. In my case, I just really wanted to keep my eyes on the little guy, make sure he's okay. I am nervous that I'm going to get home and he's not going to be doing good. Where would...

1:45:10We put him. He would be, more than likely, he'd be in your office in a little tiny kennel or in his bag. Or in your purse. Happy birthday, Chris. I would have been totally okay with that, just for the record. I would not. He would have just slept. He's very sleepy. And if he had gotten sick, I would, of course, have cleaned it up. But it would have been in his kennel. Would you? Yeah, I cleaned it up for three hours last night. Jamie, my wife, works for Staples. She has a 12-hour ride-along today. 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. So I'm like, all right, as soon as we're out of here today, the kid's got to race home. A dad's got to do what a dad's got to do. You tell him. Take him to the vet, maybe? Yeah, I'm going to. That would be a good idea. Well, there's no vets open at 2 o'clock in the morning. And then I had to be at work at 4.30. So I would have. If it was at 4 in the afternoon yesterday, we wouldn't be having this conversation. We would have been at the vet. Would you have let him take off to take the dog to the vet? From the show? Yes. Oh, wow. Oh, my goodness. We have a different sort of job. We, you know. Yeah. I've actually... How long have we been on the air? About a year and a half? Uh-huh. Never taken a sick day. Never one. No. You did show up late one time because you overslept. And you got in at 8.30. Yeah. Was it 8.30? 8. No, I think it was more like... 7.30? I think it was more like 6.30, I think. No. I don't think it was. I think it was. No, you're wrong. But at any rate, I've never called in sick.

1:46:36You've taken days off to go to weddings. Yeah, I've taken days off to go to weddings. Doesn't that count? I haven't called in sick. I haven't called in sick. I haven't called in sick, but I've gone to weddings. I've never called in sick. I had taken a planned day off. I had taken a planned day off. People have taken sick days on the show. It's allowed to do. Exactly. But you're like, I've never. I'm always here. You're not always here. I didn't say that. I said I've never taken a sick day. Okay. Right? That's verbatim when I said I've never taken a sick day. I have taken planned days off, as have you, as have you, as have everybody. If I said, hey, dude, I'm going to take a sick day today and take my dog to the vet, that would be a problem? No. But... No, wait. Let me explain. Okay. Would it be a problem? No. You could do it. Would you be mad at me? Would I be mad at you? No. I wouldn't be mad at you. Would I think that it's extraordinarily odd? Brilliant word for it. Yes. Really? Macabre. Just kidding. Am I? Yes, I am. It's not my cop. I'm just kidding. See, I didn't use the word weird. It would be weird to you. I didn't use the word weird. It would be odd to you. It would be a bit odd. It would be a bit odd. Why would it be odd? Well, I'll tell you why. Because I'd come into work and Sienna would say, have you seen Woods? And I would say, no, but I heard from him. And Sienna would say, is he okay? And I would say, yeah, he's fine. And Lauren would say, what's going on? And I would say, well.

1:48:06He's taken Senior Beans. Well, no, he hasn't yet, so I couldn't say that. I'd say he's at home. Oh, my gosh, what's wrong with Jamie? Nothing. It's Senior Beans. We would just be silent. Oh, no. You would? Senior Beans passed? No, he didn't pass. No, he didn't pass on. He's okay. But Woods said that he threw up last night and Woods wants to stay home. And take him to the vet. Even if he did pass on, if he passed overnight, would you not be in the next day? Damn straight. And I understand that. I understand that. I understand that. I understand that. I would still come to work. You would? If my dog passed away? You don't like animals. You eat animals. I love my dog. Do you? I love my dog, but... If Bear died, you would come into work? I would still come into work. I would think most people... I've been at work with several people. Yeah, most people come into work. You don't want me here the next day. I would be crying the whole time. You don't want me here the next day. You power through. You power through. Not with this job. You know what? You pull up your skirt and you come to work. To me, a dog dying is pretty, you know. It's big.

1:49:15It's a pretty big deal. It's a date you'll always remember. You know, I have 701949. I probably would come, but I would be a freaking wreck. A wreck. I, unfortunately, have had three relatives pass since I've been on this job. Came to work. Every time effort happened. Powered through. Powered through. But none of those, well, it's, yeah, relatives is different. I mean, it's different. Blood relatives. Blood, okay. Oh, but it's not a dog. No, no, no. Hang on. They don't live with you. In defense to Woods. Oh, my God. In defense to Woods. Do not diminish. Hang on. I'm not diminishing. Wait a second. You're diminishing. You are diminishing. You're diminishing. Because, L.O.B., if somebody in your home died that you live with. You're telling me you're coming to work? No way. Just because I don't live? Yes, it does. I didn't live with my grandfather. Come on. It didn't mean that he wasn't my grandfather for 30 years, that I loved him. Of course. If Senior Beans was somebody that Woods loved, that lived in New Jersey, and he hadn't seen, he would be sad, and he would be really crushed. But I think he'd come to work. Absolutely. So proximity equals love? Proximity equals love? No.

1:50:26But what does, it's not about love. Okay. It's about, it's about the level of impact. I don't think we can put levels on this. No. You're telling me that if BFMC, God forbid something happened. He's a person. That's my boyfriend. Yes. That's different than a pet. But to Woods. Oh. Oh my gosh. It's a true story. Crazy town. This is a little bit nuts. I do think it's overboard. Wow. I do think it's overboard. You're making ridiculous. No, no, no. But it's me. It doesn't matter. Just compare the dog to her boyfriend, Mike. Yeah. That's different. I didn't. Wait a second. Hang on, though. Doesn't it make a difference if you live with someone? I have both. I've had uncles die. The husband, the dog. My uncle died. My favorite uncle died. I went to work. If somebody in my home died, I'm not coming to work. Unless it's Jules. So what about your other cat? Jules? No, yeah. Oh, Sydney. Sydney. When Sydney got eaten. It took me a week to figure it out that he was gone. Right. That's you. After about a week, I went, have you seen that orange one? And Rebecca goes, no, I haven't. Oh, my God. It's so sad. It's so sad. I cannot imagine. I can't imagine. Jamie's like, where's Savannah? I was like, haven't seen her in a week. Cats are different. Cats are different. Don't. That's cruel, Mike. I think I know what happened.

1:51:50Great. Hey, listen. Jules is outside four days out of the month. I'm responsible for zero of those days. Now, one day, incessantly for seven hours straight, is going to draw the attention of neighborhood coyotes. And after about three months, one of us will go, have you seen Jules? Oh, my gosh. Jules will have been already, you know, digested and will still be from the grave going, yeah, you haven't even noticed for three months. I'm poop now. I'm poop now. I'm poop on the mountainside from... That is so sad. Not even funny. I'm telling... Hey, listen. Well, so I can be Mr. Pretend here.

1:52:59I'm just telling you the truth. Asked and answered. Asked and answered. I know now that if any of my dogs pass on, better drag my ass into work. No. Yes. M1 Jackie from PB. Hi. Hi. And recently I let them out in this little courtyard area in the morning while I'm like getting ready because they're safe there. Well, last week apparently they weren't safe. My little, my youngest dog, he. somehow, I don't know what it was, but got hit by something and he just started shrieking. And I ran down there and he was literally so scared that he had gone to the bathroom. And I felt so bad for him. I stayed home from work because he was so shooken up. And so I totally feel for Woods. I would be okay with that. Thank you. If Woods called me and said, look, dude, my dog got hit by a car, I'd be like, oh, yeah. I mean, that...

1:53:59Is it different? Yeah. I think it's different. Even Jay says it's different. Yeah. I think it's... I gotta stay home and put him out of his misery. Why don't you bring the dog in? I'm okay with that. Mike, are you okay with that? He's not okay with it. That's all I really wanted. I wanted to be like, dude, if he's... Hey, man, I need you here. Hang on, hang on. I don't want anybody to get upset about this, but when we come back, I'm going to tell you exactly how I feel about that. AT&T, ladies and gentlemen. Oh, do I love AT&T. And you will, too. All you have to do is give them a call. And if you're looking for just flat-out speed in your Internet service, you've got to get a hold of them. $14.95 a month, 12 months select services. It's a one-year term, so that price is guaranteed for you. Try AT&T. Just take my word for it and try it, and then let me know what you think. Now, that includes the on-the-go network, on-the-go access, the whole Wi-Fi network that they have comes along with it at no extra charge. So give them a call, 877-ONLY-ATT, or you can go online, att.com slash nocord.

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2:02:07starting July 2nd at Burger King. Main Street northbound ramp to the 5-in accident there. It's an SUV that rolled into the embankment. They have that whole ramp blocked right now. Things clearing up, though, on the 5 southbound, excuse me, the 15 southbound before Poway Road an earlier motorcycle accident. They have removed that. 5 northbound at Manchester Avenue, a car stalled, and they've gotten rid of that one as well. So you'll find a little slowing just as they removed it. 5 southbound before Balboa Avenue, we've got that incident cleared as well. Things are looking good. good this morning. This report brought to you by Lowe's. July 4th, you get stopped by Lowe's. Buy one 16-pound bag of Kingsford charcoal. They will give you one for free. Look how great things are. Valid through July 4th. Some restrictions do apply. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. I got this from Target. Wood. Smoke Marlboro. Drink Budweiser. Sienna. Those are nutty bars? Yeah. Those are the best. My own kid. On FM 94. You take the day off. Your pet was sick. 570-1949. Sienna, what's going on in the news? An update on the Amanda Knox situation. You know her as the American student who was put on trial for killing her roommate when she was studying abroad in Italy.

2:03:55Well, independent experts are now challenging the forensic evidence which was used against her in her murder trial. They're saying that some of the DNA may have been contaminated and the results are unreliable. Now, this could boost her chances of overturning this conviction. Really? And she could get out if this ends up working out. Also, Wiener, Representative Anthony Wiener, now he is no longer a member of the Congress, but still as an ex-member, you get access to a lot of the perks. He's still hitting up the gym, you know, the Congress gym. Sure. Going to the library, doing all those wonderful things. Of course. Woods, what's going on in sports? Real quick, I saw a picture of Wiener and his wife having lunch. Oh, my gosh. It was icy. There were icicles hanging from the table. They weren't looking at each other. It was mortifying. Probably a rough time. Oh, yes. Well, the NBA appears headed for a lockout. Well. Just like the NFL, the current collective bargaining agreement is expiring at midnight tonight. And sources say they are nowhere close to a deal. The NBA and the NFL could be a lot. I know, dude. The owners are saying, well, the players are making too much money. We want to lower the pay cap and slash the length of years available for contracts and player salaries by a third. Oh, wow. So I'm sure the players are going to be real stoked with that.

2:05:19Now they're going to be really far apart trying to hammer out a deal, too. Wow. Too bad. For your Wimbledon update. Please. With your reporter. Please. Rafael Nadal, Novak Djokovic, and Andy Murray have all moved on. Do you know who has not moved on, Mike? Who? Roger Federer has been beaten by Joe Wilfried Songer. No one's ever heard of this chap. What a shame. Roger Federer being up two sets. in Grand Slam matches was 178-0 until yesterday. That's really sad. It's a sad day. Now, Songa will play Djokovic, and Nadal will go up against Andy Murray in the men's semifinals. Feast. Congratulations. I'd go to England except that the food sucks. And it really does. I've heard. It does. They have penguins there. Those little cookies? Yeah. I've heard that... I've heard that...

2:06:27The food there is really bland. And I've also heard that the hotels stink. They're really old. Yeah. Everything in Europe is pretty old. All the hotels. I don't like the smell of mold. It's expensive, too. Yeah. I've heard that. So, Woods wanted to take a day off because his dog was sick. Allegedly. Allegedly. I would have liked to... His email says, Hey, bro. Just wanted to let you know Sonny's been up all night throwing up. I haven't really slept much. What's the protocol on something like this? Maybe bring him in. I need you here, pal. Bring the little guy in. Keep your eyes on him. I need you. Okay. I'll be there. Happy birthday. Yeah. Well, not really happy birthday. So here's what I was going to tell you. I wouldn't be angry at you if you brought him in.

2:07:29But I would think that something's mentally wrong with you. Mentally, really? Yeah, I would. Really mentally wrong with me? Let me say, I would question whether or not you had all of your marbles. And I would wonder if some of them had fallen out. And you lost them. Clearly. If maybe you'd lost a couple of your marbles. I wouldn't say anything. I'd keep it to myself. I wouldn't say a word. I would allow it. I would watch you, I would observe you in your natural habitat, and I would study you, but I would not think it was normal. I would think it a bit odd. Well, we do not have the traditional, finger quote, office, right? Like we're not sitting in cubes and there's not a... manager walking around making sure you're on the phone. Like, you're the boss and it's pretty loose and we have fun and we have ripped t-shirts hanging from the walls and all kinds of stuff. Yeah, pinatas and dartboards. There's a hat with boobs on it over there. Yeah, but Woods, if we worked in my garage and it was from my house, I would think that's an odd thing to do because what if the dog poops or throws up? Well, he was going to be and I was going to bring him in his little kennel. No, I know. I would just clean it up.

2:08:50It wouldn't, I mean, no harm, no foul. No, it would kind of smell like a kennel in here, though, wouldn't it? No, he'll be in the other room. And he's not going to be on your board already. So for Chris. So for Chris. Well, then I could put him out, like, back there. Oh, yeah, that's great with me. So, yeah. Perfect. Wow. That's a little selfish, I think. It's not. A little selfish on your part. No, I was just trying to take care of my dog. He could sit on my lap. Yeah, I was just trying to take care of my dog. I wasn't trying to, like, put anybody out. I'd say bringing a healthy dog in is more normal than bringing in a sick dog. I would agree with that. Maybe put him in the bathtub with a blanket and some water. That's it. Hey. Oh, yeah. It's contained. Get a dog sitter, I say. Yeah. There's 24-hour clinics for dogs, too. That is true. I didn't know that. But you can take a sleeping bag and open it up, and they're soft, and you can lay it down in the tub. Yeah. Maybe I just bury them in the backyard just to make it right. I mean, eventually. Santa's got her hands over her face. She can't believe it. She thinks it's monstrous. What about you? M1 Horse Girl calling from San Diego. Hi, Mikey. I love you, but I have to disagree with you. I'm with Woods 100% on this whole pet thing. I'd let him bring the dog in. I would just think it odd. Well, you know, it's the deal. You know, pets don't get sick that often. And when they do, it's a big deal. Yeah, because they can't communicate to you what's going on with them. No, they can't. Watch like a baby. Exactly. And, you know.

2:10:15Well, you're not comparing Woods' dog to his kids. Fake kids. Oh, no. I have fake children. I don't have real children. We're not fortunate enough to be able to have children in a natural way. Our dogs have kind of taken the place for the child. That's how it works. You guys, listen to me. Just because, you know, his dogs are important to him, and that's what should matter. Thank you. You know, Woods' dog, that's his life. Thank you. That's his life, and that's what's important. You know, Woods comes in every... I listen to you guys all the time on the radio, and he comes in every day at work, and he probably comes in when he's got a sniffle, and he comes in, and he doesn't use his sick time very often, and it's okay to use a sick day. You know, I had the same experience with my cat, and... Don't turn her down. Don't turn her down. Oh, no. Oh, we lost her. I think we lost her. Dang it. Thank you very much. I really appreciate it. Maybe you should just stay home with your animals every day. Why would I do that? Because they're not sick every day. So that wouldn't make any sense. You've got to value that time. You could be a home mom. What is a home mom? Yeah, what's a home mom? You know, mom stays home with the kids. Stay at home mom? A stay at home mom. So are you saying... Mr. Woods. Yes, Mr. Esparza. My friend Mike. Are you saying...

2:11:44That in order to feel a lot of emotion, it doesn't have to be a person. Oh, dude, yeah. Right? Absolutely. What if it was not a pet, but it was an animal, but it was a pet? Okay. I can't speak to that because I've never had anything other than a dog. Okay. And I actually had a cat for a while. But my question to you is, what if it was a pet rock or a cactus or a plant? Do those have heartbeats? No, but they're living things. Do they have blood? No, but they're living. Oh, so the qualification is a heartbeat in blood. Well, the ability to get sick, I would say. Like, I wouldn't stay home with my dogs just because I wanted them. Plants can get sick. Uh-huh. How do you know? Because they turn yellow. They wilt. And they wilt. So you know what you do? You give them some water, then you put them in the sun, then you go to work. No. That's so heartless. Yeah. Don't be ridiculous. You're being ridiculous. Am I. Yeah. They don't have. Because, see, that's a word that I reserved for. bringing your dog in a kennel and putting it in the office with Chris, I thought that was a little odd. And you think it's odd. And you're looking at me with my love for my cactus as if I were some sort of weirdo. Which you would be. Yes. So that's where you draw the... What if I'm attached to it? What if I've taken care of that thing and made that thing live for 12 years? Right. Got me through the good and the bad. Oh my gosh. Now you're being...

2:13:13Are you guys telling me that there are people that do not have an attachment to their plants? L.O.B. probably has an attachment to plants. No, I kill all my plants. That's true. She eats them. Yes, I'm telling you that there may be four people in the entire universe that are attached like you would be to a pet to their plant. That's way understated. Okay, sorry. Nine. There are nine people in the world that are attached to their plants. They're on the show My Crazy Addiction. Exactly. They're on hoarders. It's those kind of people that are attached to their plants. Yes. There's a lot of episodes of hoarders. Right. All right. Thousands of people. Hey, listen. Can't wait to get home today. Hopefully. I hope he's still breathing. Oh, my God. Don't say that. I really hope so. I hope he hasn't pulled a Jimi Hendrix and choked on his own vomiter or something. Well, we will miss him. Imagine how bad you would feel, Mike. Well, of course I would. He looked at me like, well, of course I would. I mean, I would. But the bottom line is, is that, you know, it's always been unusual to me when people put the same value on a dog that they do a human being. I know. You've been lucky enough to have kids the normal way, and you guys have been able to do that. Jamie and I just aren't, you know? So, like, our dogs have really, they really have taken the place of children. Now, now, when we get a child.

2:14:39If we're ever blessed. When? If and when we are blessed with a child to, you know, fulfill our lives, like all you guys have. You'll get there. Oh, wow. Yeah, I mean, you never know. Is that a guarantee? It's not a guarantee, but if I'm ever lucky enough, maybe my dogs will. Spring a bazooka to a. They start to play second fiddle. Maybe. To a slingshot. They may. They may. But we're just not that lucky yet. You're sweet. We haven't been blessed. This is sweet. We haven't been blessed. New monster. We were close. We were close. We were one week away, and then it didn't happen. It will happen. I actually came to work that next day, too. It will happen. High five. M1AK from Point Loma. Are you there? Yes. What was the word of the day? Nopal. That is right. What was it? Nopal, which is cactus. Wow. Because I eat nopales. Oh, and by the way, those are inanimate objects. Even though they're living organisms on Wood's account. They're still not, they're, yeah. They're growing. They don't move. They're living things. They don't move. You know, I know, and I know people who own nurseries who are attached to their plants, but it's still not the same as an animal living thing that looks at you and, you know. Reacts to you? Oh, eyes. Eyes is the requirement. Okay, yeah. Well, I have a potato at home. Yeah, it's got eyes. Does it have eyes? Yeah, it does. They're ocular lenses. Does it touch you?

2:16:02Yes. Does it follow you around? Does it touch you or do you touch it? What if keeping it alive means something? You know, have you ever seen the movie Cast Away? Yes, Wilson. Do you think that Wilson... I'm sorry, I hung up on him. That was a mistake. I was trying to put him on hold. He's the word of the day. Word of the day. Callback. Callback. Anyway. Do you think that Tom Hanks wasn't attached to Wilson? I think he definitely was. It was also a different scenario since he had been stranded on a desert island with no food, water, or shelter for five years. Mike is rarely reaching for these comparisons. I don't think there's anything wrong. All I'm saying is I do think it's odd. That's all. And I can see where you would see that. Because you hate animals. I don't hate animals. I can see how you would see that. I don't hate animals. You and Jay hate animals. I love animals. I have all kinds of animals. I don't hate animals. I just don't have emotions for animals. And the reason I don't is because I cut myself off from it because I lost one and it really over affected me. Even by that logic though, even by that logic, by that exact sentence, you know that those feelings do exist because you had them. Yes.

2:17:14You had them. Yes. So you can actually say, yeah, I can get behind the fact that those emotions exist. Yes. Okay. That's all I want. That's all I want. I know they exist. I just think that it's too... Because you had them. And it hurt you so bad, in fact, Mike, that you had to shut yourself off for the next 35 years. Is that right? Yes. Would you say that they were so powerful? Yes. Would you say that it hurt so bad that you no longer allow yourself to feel anything? Mr. McGee, don't make me angry. I would say that that is a fairly accurate statement, but... Did you say the dog side? Side. Something inside of you. I don't have emotions either way. Right. I don't have sad emotions for them. I don't have, you know, positive. It's just... They're there. Very neutral. Well, I think the word would be maybe even a little bit of a nuisance. You maybe find them a nuisance. Is that a fair statement? Yes. Okay. Well, I find them a nuisance for me. Right. For my own. Right. And that's not true. I find other ones a nuisance as well. Cats come and poop in the yard, and it's filthy. It's filthy. You know? We have poop.

2:19:00From birds all over. So I think that in general, yeah, I do. I find a lot of them a nuisance. You know? What would you do if you stayed home all day? Well, I would have taken him to the vet. Well, you could have taken him to the vet before you came in. You know what I would have done? I would have laid there and let him put his tiny little head right here on my chest. And how does that make him better? Like even if you're homesick, does Jamie stay home? To watch you? No, but I'm a grown human adult. Well, your dog's grown. She has the word. Your dog ears. How old is your dog? Sonny's four years old. Yeah, he's an adult. He's a dog. He's an adult. He's got his own apartment. He's an adult dog. Once he can cut his own food, then he's an adult, pal. Sienna? Yeah. Can you tell me about the guy that got his hand stuck in the gas tank? Oh, yeah. This guy from Wisconsin, from Fond du Lac. He was at the gas station and noticed that the candy bar was inside the gas tank. It was, in fact, a Snickers. And he reached in the gas tank for it. Hand got stuck. Firefighters had to come.

2:20:14Why wait? You hungry? Why wait? Firefighters had to come. They had to cut the filler pipe. Then they had to access the backside of the gas tank, which opened enough for them to get his fingers and free him. But then they had to cut the pipe off of his hand once they freed him. It was a process. All for a Snickers bar. He was from Wisconsin, right? Yeah. Did he give his name or no? Let's just call him Josh. Hi, Josh. You're from Wisconsin? Oh, yeah. And you got your hand stuck in the gas tank going for the old Snickers bar. Yeah, that's not the smartest thing I ever did. Yeah, and... I guess you're just a big Snickers guy, huh? I love the Snickers. Do you have AAA or any kind of thing like that? Yeah, I got some AAA up there. You know, it's good stuff. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Don't stop. Say that again? What is that? I said it's the good stuff. No, no, no. The whole thing I didn't hear at the beginning. I said, yeah, it's Snickers bars that are really stuck in the gas tank. You got to get them out with your hand. Talking to Josh from Wisconsin. Obviously. Got a Snickers cot in his gas tank.

2:21:33What were you going to do, Josh? I mean, once you got the Snickers out, were you going to eat it? Well, you can't leave it in there. Why not? Why? Because it'll mess with the guests. Is that right, Josh, from Wisconsin? Be confident, Jay. You got this. What part of Wisconsin did you grow up in? Upper East Side. Outstanding. His name was Ear, so you know. Ear? E-A-R-R. E-A-R-R. He's 20 years old. Love Snickers. Ear? Ear? Ear? Watch that smart mouth, Ear. Got your report card here. It's your newspaper. Will you get over here, Ear? Ear ye, ear ye. Ear ye, ear ye.

2:22:33Come here, you ear. So bad. So why do husbands get so mad at the kids when the kids cry? I remember when I was a kid crying and dad getting irritated. Mom doesn't really get irritated. Dads get irritated. Moms have a sixth sense about it. Now, you guys all looked at me when I said that. History repeats itself. To my defense, we're talking about my son, Ryan. He's going to be two years old next month. Adorable. And Ryan, you know, he tends to cry more than your average bear. You know, about nothing. He doesn't have a reason. He's a newborn. He's a baby. Hey, Rebecca has even taken to saying, Ryan ever cry? She's desensitized because you always say it. I'm telling you, it's a true fact, but I want to know, how come we get pissed when kids, why do we, 570-1949 if you have an answer to that. Wait till I tell you about this. How do you get in trouble for charging a cell phone? And wait till I tell you who it was. That's right.

2:24:11got something worth adding to the Mikey show? Thanks, Nostradamus. Text him at 949mikey at gmail.com. No. Or call Mikey now. 570-1949. There he is, the Prince of Canada. Mikey. More coming up on FM 94.9. This is the FM. Hey, it's Hillary with some shows for you to go check out next Thursday the 7th. Go see Anya. She's back. Anya Marina at the cast for July 7th. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club play at the Del Mar Racetrack on July 29th for a 4 o'clock Friday. The next FM 94.9 about the music show is with the Bell Brigade. $6 gets you into the Belly Up August 2nd to see them. The San Diego Music Awards are at Humphreys on August 8th. Death Cat for Cutie hit the Remack August 16th. Company of Thieves are at the Belly Up August 24th. Butthole Servers play 4th and B August 26th. And Two Nights of Thievery Corporation will happen at House of Blues. September 7th and 8th. And a few more good shows just announced like Erasure, The Misfits, Stephen Malcolmus and the Jicks, and Wild Flags. So there you have it. Get out there and see some shows. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 concert calendar online at FM949SD.com. Here at the Coors Brewery, our viewpoint hasn't changed in nearly 140 years. Because right outside our window is a stunning view.

2:25:38of the Rockies, the only place legendary Coors Banquet beer has ever been brewed. Banquet is made with only Rocky Mountain water and the best high country barley for that smooth, full-flavored taste. We've been doing it that way since 1873, and like the mountains themselves, that's not about to change. If your views are anything like ours, then you know a good thing when you see it. It's in that cold banquet bottle right there on the bar. Coors, the banquet beer. Coors Brewing Company, Golden, Colorado. Coors Banquet believes with great beer comes great responsibility. Since the launch of the new HTC Inspire 4G from AT&T, people everywhere are having what can only be described as aha moments. It's as if little light bulbs... are turning on over people's heads all around town. Eyes are widening with excitement, faces lighting up with joy. Some are experiencing these aha moments while watching HD movies on the Inspire 4G's glorious 4.3-inch screen. Some aha moments are coming after shooting incredible HD video and uploading it to share with family and friends. And others while perusing the thousands of Android apps. You see, life is filled with aha moments. The HTC Inspire 4G just helps people get them a whole lot faster.

2:27:05A fast phone for fast people. Get the new HTC Inspire 4G for only $99.99. Only from AT&T. Rethink possible. 4G speeds available in limited areas and may not be available in your area. Learn more at att.com slash network. Two-year voice agreement of $39.99 or higher and minimum $15 monthly data plan required. Other charges and restrictions apply. Visit att.com or store for details. Vons is celebrating the 4th with spectacular all-American daily deals now through the 4th of July. Today's daily deal, burgers and cheese. Today, only with Vons Club, 80% lean ground beef is only $1.97 a pound in the Extreme Value Pack. And Kraft Singles are buy one, get one free. Selected varieties limit two. Come into Vons for new daily deals every day until the 4th. At Vons, we love summer, so we're going to help you make the most of it with fantastic prices all summer long. This week, our Vons Club specials are sure to put you in the holiday mood. Rancher's Reserve Beef New York Strip Steak Bone In is only $4.47 a pound in the Extreme Value Pack. And get five years of sweet white or bicolor corn for just $1. Twelve packs of Coca-Cola, Pepsi, or 7-Up cans are buy two, get three of equal or lesser value free. Plus, CRV in California must buy five, limit six free per transaction. At Vons, we're going to help you make every summer day a celebration. Vons, ingredients for life.

2:28:23This is the sound of Jim at a ball game realizing he forgot to stop by the bank. Oh, I promised my wife I'd deposit these checks. This is the sound of Charles, a Chase banking customer at the same game remembering the same thing. Oh, I totally forgot to deposit these checks. Jim. Ugh, now I gotta leave the game early. I didn't even get a hot dog. Charles. I'll just use Chase Quick Deposit and deposit my checks from right here. With Chase Quick Deposit, you can deposit checks safely and securely from anywhere, including Section 100, Row 5, Seat 12. Simply take a picture of the front and back of your check with Chase Quick Deposit on your smartphone. Hit send, and you're done. Now that's a step forward. This is the sound of Jim trying to leave early so he can deposit his checks. Excuse me. Pardon me. Hey! Sorry, pal. This is the sound of Charles after catching a fly ball and depositing his three checks. Chase Quick Deposit. Take a step forward and chase what matters. Chase Quick Deposit is now available for select smartphones. Enroll in Chase online and download Chase mobile app. Subject to eligibility. Deposit subject to verification. Not available for media withdrawal. Limits, terms, and conditions apply. Message and data rates from your service provider may apply. See chase.com slash quick deposit for details and eligible smartphones. JPMorgan Chase Bank and a member of TIC. I'm in a new BMW with Olympic track and field hopeful Jeremy Warner. Jeremy is driving. And man is Jeremy fast. Yeah, you can slow down now. Why would I do that?

2:29:37Jeremy stopped by a participating BMW center during the BMW drive for Team USA because with every test drive, they'll make a donation to support our Olympians. Jeremy, I could take over if you want. You know, you should save your strength for the meat. Nah, I'm good. Okay. Test drive any model from the lineup. They all come with no-cost maintenance. There's a guy in the 3 Series behind us with a bullhorn. It's my coach. Your coach. Can he turn it down? Okay. Can you hear me? Dedication. Well, like the Olympics, the BMW drive for Team USA brings out the best in all of us. So get behind the wheel of a BMW and show your support. Hey, you ready to open it up? Hurry into your local BMW dealer and help support our athletes. Visit SDCountyBMW.com for details. It's time to celebrate. Sportual A's 4th of July sale is going on right now. You'll find great deals throughout the entire store. Save big when you take an additional 50% off already reduced men's, women's, and kids' clothing and shoes. Take an additional 25% to 50% off already reduced clearance, bikes, fitness, camping, fishing gear, and so much more. Plus, you can take 25% off select regularly priced gear, clothing, and shoes. This is something you don't want to miss.

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2:32:01right shoulder. This report brought to you by Keep Your Home California. Are you unemployed or do you owe more than your home is worth? Federal funds are available to help you out. You don't have to lose your home. Visit KeepYourHomeCalifornia.org or call 888-954-KEEP. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. That you've been talking about. I don't want some dumbed down version of it. Woods. I have one wish. I wish I wasn't so fast. Zienna. Yeah, I would say I'm obsessed with Sage. Yeah, I'm obsessed. You are. And Jay. I love to look, but I just don't like to look. On FM 94.9. Tonight's 8 o'clock album is Gnarl Sparkly. Garrett. The Odd Couple. Topic is, how come dads get mad when kids cry? Dads are D's. Someone Corey from San Diego. Yes. I think that could be it. I think that's part of it. And I'm going to offer something else, too. I think that it could also be that the sound of it makes us sad, which makes us angry. Perhaps. And we don't like it.

2:34:00It makes us sad. I think you guys are just not very patient. I can agree with that. I get frustrated when other people's kids cry other than my kids. I get frustrated when other people's kids cry. It's like, come on, put me in a baby. Yeah, I don't. If other people's kids are crying, I'm like, oh man, I'm glad I don't have to deal with that. But if, like sometimes, sometimes if Ryan, like if one of my kids is doing something stupid and they hurt themselves doing something stupid and start crying, I'm sad, and I get mad. It's weird. It's weird. If she does something wrong, and she says, go to your father, we'll scream bloody murder like somebody just ripped off her arms and legs. Yeah. And started beating her with him. She hadn't even been touched yet. Yesterday, dude? You got kids. I want my nephews and my little baby cousins, but yeah. Okay. I'm a teacher. Okay, because our kids are two, and last night, I saw Luke.

2:35:06cry more passionately than he's ever cried before. I mean passionately. What happened was Rebecca told him that he could have a cookie. And here, you listen to the rest of it on the radio because I'm going to hang up, but Rebecca told Luke he could have a cookie. He asked for a cookie. He said cookie. She said okay. And she messed up. She thought we had cookies. We didn't. Alright, so she gave him a very Viable substitute, which was a little gramstick. Okay? I am not making this up. She gave him the gramstick. He took it and threw it at her. Oh, my God. He is your son. Yes. Which made me laugh. But I didn't laugh out loud. I put my head down. Because it was funny, man. Hell, yeah, that's funny. It was like, I don't want no freaking gramstick, man. It's the same bit that our wives do to us when they try to give us a fake bit. It's like your pork chops. Yeah, we don't want a fake bit. I like bone-in pork chops. Yes. I want a grilled cheese sandwich with freaking American cheese, not Colby Jack. Not Colby Jack. You should just throw the meals at your wives. And in your head, you're like, any second, I'm going to be freaking eating that bone-in pork chop. And it's filthy. And I'm going to cut the knife around the bone, and it's going to be rad. Yeah, yeah. Or I'm going to have my...

2:36:33Any second I'm going to have that grilled cheese and that Kraft Single is going to be melting over the sides. It's going to be perfect. It's going to be perfect. It's going to be crunchy and buttery and cheesy. And then you get that oily, hard cheese. Sour. It's sour. Colby Jack. And you eat it and you go. Kraft Singles is nothing but oil. Yeah. It tastes delicious. Well. Whatever it is, it's delicious. So. So he threw the graham stick back at her, and it was a meltdown like I've never seen. Like, just, I mean, he was melting down. And I said, I go, that's the same bit, man. I said, hey, dude, that's as good as it's going to get. And she was turning his seat around. I said, you ever have your friends form their own show, bro? All right? Don't give me that. Let me tell you something. It doesn't get better. This is as good as it gets, a cookie. But at this point in his life, that's the worst thing that's ever happened to him. That's his radio show. That's his radio show getting taken away. That cookie. That cookie. Yeah. And he was like, I mean, it was a travesty to him. For sure. It was a travesty to him. And I said to Rebecca, can we do anything about that? And she said, no, you just got to let him learn that, you know, it's all right.

2:37:53Our babysitter will sit next to us because Nita is out of town. So you can do Nita voice because she's not. This is so much fun. Woods will not do this voice. Wood. Hello, Mike. Wood will not do this voice with Nita in town. Hello, Mike. Because he say, I don't want to do voice because Rebecca sometimes in kitchen with Nita listening to radio when he does voice and this make them both uncomfortable. This is so much fun. And she says, this is so much fun. But since Nita's gone, Brittany, who just graduated from high school, was over. What? $22. No, that's not the best. Is that the same? She was sitting next to me. And this is a little bit of a rabbit hole, but I think you'll find this funny. I started to explain the Casey Anthony trial to her. Because it was on TV and she asked one question. And I answered it. And then continued. One question too many. She asked one question too many. And so I started to explain it to her. And from start to finish, probably 20 minutes. Now, about, now, about, about. The actual answer, by the way, took two minutes to answer. The actual answer to what she asked. Two minutes.

2:39:24Now, after about two minutes, Luke started to cry. And when he finished, I said, so anyway, then the mom, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And she had a look that I recognized real quick, went by in a flash. You recognize it really quick. And the look was, oh, you're going to still talk about that. The look was, hmm, you're that guy. The look was, uh-oh. Like, oh, you're old. Easy, Grandpa. Yeah. It was also, I'm embarrassed for you. Wow. It didn't stop me. Of course not. It didn't stop me. I continue to tell her. We were interrupted thrice more times. Oh, my God. At least by other things, you know. And I go.

2:40:26So, okay, so anyway. Mike's really into Casey Anthony, if you didn't know. Yes. The trial. Consumed. When that kind of stuff happens, you should take it as maybe like a sign from God, like, I should stop the story. Yeah. I should. Just cut it off. I should. You don't. Anyway. Where was I? So anyway. So anyway, so then she's on the phone in the courthouse interviews. Brittany. Oh, Mike. Wake up. What did I just say? Wake up. Wake up. Tell me what I just said. Actually, let me back up because now it's out of context. So let me back up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let me go back. Let me go back. Let me go back. Let me go back. That's so Mikey. I'm like, so the dad molested her, okay? And, which is weird, right? She's looking at me like, oh, wow. Is she texting and going, uh-huh? Uh-huh. Oh, my God. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

2:41:22I'm just telling my parents to come pick me up. Uh-huh, uh-huh. Quick. I'm typing OMG over and over again to my friends. OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG. Lame sauce. He won't shut up. He won't shut up. He won't shut up. He won't shut up. Fatty, you want a cracker? Fatty, you want a cracker? Greatness. How about this? Pretty good. Yesterday, I think it was, yeah, yesterday. No, when did Matt fly with the niece? Last night. Last night. Your boyfriend? Yes. Matt Commerce? Mm-hmm. He flew with his seven-month-old niece? Yes, just him. Oh. On a cross-country flight? Mm-hmm. One stop? Mm-hmm. How come he had the niece? That's a long story. Okay. One time for it on the air. Think a guy, she writes in her recap, think a guy with nice arm muscles and a baby ever gets attention from every woman on the plane? He does have great arms. What? He does. Wiener time.

2:42:35It was the weirdest thing. Everyone on the plane was helping me. That's her imitation. And dead on. Of her boyfriend, Matt Commerce. It was the weirdest thing. Was it? Then there was these two girls that... Oh, and then this one girl... Well, I shouldn't say girl. She was like a 55-year-old woman. Was she? By 55, he means 25. Yeah. And then at the end, it just got funny because everyone was just passing her around. By everyone, I mean like the girls. Yeah. This one girl was like, can you, can she sit on my lap? I mean. Can I sit on your, I mean. Can she sit on my lap? Can I hold it? I mean her. Oh my. Can I touch her? Wow, you can hold her with one arm. You must be really strong. We know that. Why does he even tell you anything?

2:43:40Doesn't he know? He should know better. He should know better. She probably asked. That's what we do. We set them up. I didn't even. You didn't riddle him? All I said, I talked to him for about three minutes last night. I still haven't seen him. And I said, I said, so how was the flight? And he was like, oh, gosh. She was pretty much like crying nonstop. But thankfully, everybody helped me out on the plane. I was like, you just let strangers help you on the plane? What do you mean? Well, it was, you know, this woman and that woman and this girl and that girl and blah, blah, blah. And he's like, oh, got to go, babe. My luggage is coming up. Smart move. Do you get any numbers? I don't know, Jay. You know, I picture Lauren, you know, when a cat gets scared and the hair stands up on the cat's back because it's ready to fight. I picture him telling her that and her hair goes. I'm not going to prod him anymore on it, but I just thought it was funny how he tries to play the whole naive, like, and it was the weirdest thing. Everybody was helping me. Of course. Guy with a baby is like, it's better than a guy with a dog. Yeah, he's got his baby gap to the arms just exploding out of his knees. So as soon as they find out, he should have been wearing a shirt that said, don't worry, it's my niece. Yeah. Look what a great uncle I am. He's like.

2:45:10I do this for kids, you know. A lot of kids are afraid to fly by themselves. By the way, I also play guitar in old folks' home. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. To seniors. To seniors. I just, you know, this is my volunteer stuff. I just like to do this, you know, volunteer. Well, I pay for it, you know. I'm also a professional singer-songwriter. I can tell. You have a nice speaking voice. Yeah, thank you. You can find me on iTunes. Oh, my. My iTunes? My stuff's on iTunes. Yeah, my stuff's on iTunes. That's a pretty big deal. Matt Commerce, so you can check that out. Is there a website? There is. You wouldn't have a website. Only, like, a famous person would have a website. Nope, I actually do have a website. Hey, by the way. way we're on a flight that originated from san diego that's where i play so if you know oh if you have a boyfriend or whatever and he's into music i always play only if i have a boy i don't have a boyfriend no i was just okay well you know your friends or whatever bring your friends i play gigs my girlfriend and i will strictly female audience too it seems like something that you would particularly cater to

2:46:13You know, I don't really take, you know, into account the demographics. I don't know. But, you know, that would be something. What kind of covers do you do? All kinds, you know. You do probably like really like only music that men like, right? I do a lot of music that women like. I mean, I think that it's. You wouldn't do like Bruno Mars. I do Bruno Mars. Oh, my gosh. But I do a slow version. Oh, my gosh. Slow version. Slow version. I slow it down. Oh, my gosh. So I had to change it up. Oh, wow. It took me about a week to change the arrangement, but I finally got it to where it's. I'd love to see you live. You know, my girlfriend runs my website. So check it out. And check her out. She, you know, she died. Rest in peace. God rest her soul. If you could still, she still ran that website. I'm actually not married or engaged. I know. That's very evident. Yeah. Now, this baby. I just changed her. Myself. Yeah, myself. You did? Yeah, it's one of those things that I just look forward to. So you know how to do that. Well, yeah. You almost seem like marriage type, but that's kind of ironic. Well, you know, yes. I guess, yes. One would say that I could be. This is my friend. Oh, hi. Hey, how you doing? Do you sing too? Yeah, I do, actually.

2:47:39You have a website? No. So anyway, Matt, you were saying your girlfriend died. God rest. You know, she was something terrific. I'll tell you. But, you know, I've been volunteering so much with the babies and the old folks. I'm 22. Yeah. I got a place in my heart for the 22-year-olds, you know? Matt, you should tell her about how your ex, I guess not your ex-girlfriend, but your girlfriend passed away. She had that big rooster tattoo on her leg. Remember that? I do remember that. Why does that seem relevant to the story? I don't know. It just, you know. I don't know. Do you have any tattoos? I can't show him. Oh, my God. I don't know you that well. We're kind of all stuck on the plane together. We still have another four hours. Right, right. You've already helped with my knees or his knees. Should I get a drink? Should we all get a drink? You guys want to get a drink? Yeah. You have a couple of drinks. One in Rome, right? We're over in Nebraska right now. You look kind of grown-fed.

2:48:49Get your guitar with the other hand. Get your guitar. Get your guitar. Matt, get your guitar with the other hand. Quickly, quickly, quickly, quickly. Oh, gosh. Get your car. You know what? Here, can you hold the baby for just a second? Oh, sure. Hey, I'll just... There's something I just thought up right now. Oh, wow. Who's that up there? He's flying here. Blonde hair. Sitting next to me. Just enjoying the beer. Hotter than in front. I don't know what I'd do. Younger. If my girl ever found a love about this. Uh-oh. She's dead. Boy, do I miss my ex-girlfriend. Such a tragic way she left me in this plane like this. But since we're on our way to go to see our families, we might as well make out. In the laboratory. I'll be. We should make out in the laboratory. That would be perfect. It too.

2:50:16The whole plane. I'll tell you what. It's a song that I actually wrote when I got my medical check back that said that I'm free of all diseases. Oh. And I was sitting in a doctor's office just sort of jotting some things down. Is that how you write songs? Yes. That's amazing. Yes, that's why I write songs. I was actually there for that and a reduction. Oh, my gosh. Looks like they didn't finish the job. He's had really bad back problems for years. I can attest to that. I can barely walk. Can I get another Rum and Zaya? Please? Holy cow. Oh, boy. By the way, if Matt hears this on the podcast, it wasn't my idea. Nor mine. It just kind of happened. It just kind of happened. It's very organic. Yes. It imitates art. Oh. Okay. Vice versa.

2:51:27Woods, I ask this question, and I ask it with fear. I don't want you to tell... If the answer's yes, don't tell me. Now or later? Or ever? You can tell me later. Okay. When we come back. Okay. And if the answer's no, just say no. Okay. Is there an occupation that a woman could have that would keep you from dating her? When we come back. When we come back. You think you got something worth adding to the Mikey show? This is what they do. Number one. Text them. Hey. 949mikey at gmail.com. If we have any children, please step out. Or call Mikey now. Are you trying to make this sound bad? Because it sounds great. 570-1949. More coming up on FM 94.9. For a limited time, you get U-verse for $29 a month, six months, DVR included. U-verse TV, it's really good. Now, you probably heard me mention it. You get the four shows that you can record at one time on your DVR. You could also record, play back.

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3:00:34I don't know. I don't either. I'm off today. I know you are. I'm off today. I'm having a day. I don't know what it is. I'm just, you know, today is not going swell for me. Very distracted. Maybe stop texting. Yes. I'm anxious because of the situation with my niece. Going to Phoenix this weekend and forgot to tell my niece. Who lives there? Who lives there. My brother called. texted and said, Deb, you told Jen that you're going to be there. Family first. Oh, boy. I felt guilty. Bad Blake first is the rule, I think. Family second. After Bad Blake. Wow. I think that's official. Sandra, what's going on in the news? Well, a new poll has found that nearly three in four Americans are supporting President Obama's recent announced decision to start withdrawing U.S. forces from Afghanistan. Of those polls, 43% said they agree with Obama and the number of troops he wants to...

3:01:40to pull out while 29% think it's too low. Also, Woods, you're going to be really happy to hear this. Randy Jackson and Steven Tyler will be returning to American Idol next season. Woods is the American Idol. He's our American Idol. He's our American Idol. He's our American Idol. He's our American Idol. Yeah, Jennifer Lopez is not sure if she's going to be returning. She has a lot of things going on right now. She has American Idol to thank for that, so she should stick with the show. Yeah, she should. Woods is ours. Is he? L.O.B. could be considered also an American Idol. Yeah. No? Both of you. Just given the opportunity, man. Right. You're the superstar. Well, let's not go that far. Woodsy, what's happening in sports? Crazy story from the PGA Tour. This guy's name is Robert Garagas, and he is actually, his career is really turning around. I finished. in a tie for third place at the U.S. Open, has admitted to smoking a ton of marijuana during rounds when he was on the Nationwide Tour. The Nationwide Tour kind of preps them for the Pro Tour. He said, oh, yeah, dude, all of the guys used to get high on the course. You go to a port-a-potty, hit a joint, and go out and finish a round. Really? He said he was smoking five, ten, maybe 20 times a day. Oh, wow. And he has quit pot and quit doing all.

3:03:06Drugs and alcohol and is sober and is now kicking some butt. Oh, good. So there you go. Also, Tennessee Titans wide receiver Kenny Britt. I've told you a lot about Kenny Britt in the last couple of weeks. He's running into some trouble, but he turned himself in on two outstanding warrants. He's going to do a little time and he's out on bail right now. And he's gotten in some trouble, man, with some motor vehicle, moving violations and some marijuana as well. So it's a very marijuana. Yes, it is. Heavy sports segment for you. Woods, is there an occupation? That a woman could have that would keep you from dating her. Outside of the sexy stuff. Yeah. Fry cook? That was very honest. A fry cook. A fry cook. Stinky. Oily, greasy, stinky. Is that bad? Sorry, if it's bad. Hey. If I'm a D, I'm a D. Call me a D. Listen. You're a D. He's not. If he's being honest, he's just being honest about his feelings. She can bathe. Yeah, but it sticks with me. A job is a job is a job. It's not about the job. It's about the... And please, Jay, you know, he's got a billion of them, I bet. Oh, I know. I bet he could sit there and rattle off 15 jobs girls could have he wouldn't want to date them. He could, but he won't. He won't. That's the difference in he and I. I will. He'll pretend that they could do anything. I've done all the dirty ghost jobs. So have I. I've washed dishes. I've worked at a gas station. I've done it. We're talking about if a girl...

3:04:34Did a job. Was there something that would exclude her from you dating her? Outside of like, you know, being a porn star, being a stripper or something. That wouldn't... Stop, Jay. If she's beautiful on the inside and the outside. How dare you? That's a lying liar. He's lying. I'm not lying. He's lying. Why do you lie, liar? So if I'm 35 years old and Jamie, God forbid something happened to her, she left me, and I was single again, I wouldn't date a fry cook. Okay, wait. What if you were out at a really cool place, right? And you're in the bar area. And two really beautiful girls come up in really nice-looking dresses and stuff, smelling great, looking great. And you talk to one of them, and she's, you know, a 15, and it turns out that she's a fry cook. Damn it, Mike. Yeah. Dude, you might have got me. I guess if I saw her in her fry cook element, I'd be like, uh-uh. Even if she was good-looking. If I saw her at a bar, that makes me a D, though. Doesn't make you a D if it's the way you feel. I know.

3:05:40And everybody listening right now, you have your thing. I mean, you have your thing. Mine, I think, would just be the adult film industry because I would be very jealous and hurt. How about an attorney? I don't think I could date an attorney. I would love that. I don't think I could. Not that I would be emasculated at all, because I wouldn't. Argumentative. Oh, no, I wouldn't want that. Too argumentative. I like to have conversations. Me too. I don't like debates. And I don't want to be on trial. No, and I don't want to debate. What about a celebrity? You're like a professional purse holder. Give me one. Like a specific celebrity? Yeah, because... I just kind of meant someone that was at the level of, say, like Katy Perry. Oh, yeah. No way. Oh, in a heartbeat. No problem. No, you just answered it. No, no. I can do it. Maybe take away that it's actually her, but someone at her level. Yeah, her name is Courtney Johnson. No. No way. And the reason is because I don't think that job is conducive with a healthy relationship. Sometimes, but most of the time, no. I don't think it is. Unless you have none. I think if it was, it'd be the celebrity. If they were on the road all the time.

3:07:04What if they were just more important and made more money than you? Oh, that'd be fine. I would like to be a home... Man, if I could just be a home dad. Stop using the home dad, home mom phrase. Home dad. Home dad. Isn't that a burger place? I don't know, B. Can we go to home dads? Let's go to home dads. Home dad in Wisconsin. Hey, Jay, what if we asked you to just tell the truth? Yeah, yeah, tell the truth. Honest cap. Really? It's a job. You go do it to make money. You don't do it to, you know, it's not your entire life. What about a defense attorney like Casey Anthony's attorney? I think that'd be cool. Oh, you would not. How do they sleep at night defending guilty people? Because some defense attorneys are... they really believe in their clients. If they were dirt balls, then, you know, no. Not all defense attorneys are scumbags. What about someone that worked for a pharmaceutical company? A CEO. She worked for Pfizer. Yeah, she developed vaccines. If they were, hmm. I guess not. I guess there you go. There it is. How about a chicken or rodeo? Oh, I'd love a chicken or rodeo. All right. What y'all don't understand is I need a woman.

3:08:21I like to spend a lot of time with my women, unlike y'all. So I can't do the celebrity or the CEO or the lawyer or anything like that because I need her time and she needs mine. I need her in my arms. Yeah, my dream would be that we both, you know, that I hit the lottery or something and we can just sit together. Well, what I'd do, Mike, is I'd build a general store and we'd just work there together. And then I'd sing to her. I'd say, I... I don't want to work. I just want to hang out with you all day. I think we'd build a little B&B. I'd cook bacon and she'd make the pancakes. Hi, good morning. Welcome to Isbell Lodge. I'm your host, J. Isbell. This is my wife who I'm in love with. All we ever do is love. It's what we do best. Well, love and make love. We love and we make love. We love to make love. We love to make love. I charge $4,000 a night for this here room. You pay for your own meals, too. So there's a jar you just put your money in. Now, I realize that you are Miss March, so therefore, I like to look. I just don't like to touch. Why? Because I am perfect. Thank you. The only thing written on my passport is...

3:09:47It's me. Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Jay Isbell stories. When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone, he missed three calls from me. Once had a near-me experience. Japanese man can eat 17 hot dogs in 45 seconds. I can eat 45 Japanese men in 17 seconds. When the boogeyman goes to sleep at night, He checks his closet. I gloved my wife Kim. The most perfect man in the world. Speaking of perfect, perfect guy movies. These are the perfect guy movies in no particular order. American Pie. Fight Club. Pulp Fiction. Superbad. Never seen it. Bad Boys 1 and 2.

3:11:17I've never seen it. What? Ridiculous. Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Yes. Didn't like it. Oh, what? Stupid movie. You're out of your mind. Matthew Broderick trying to be a cool guy. It doesn't work. Don't buy it. It's like Tobey Maguire trying to be Spider-Man. Don't buy it. Don't buy it. And his hot little girlfriend. Porky's. And? Great guy movie. Coming of age. Clerks. 100. Overrated, but yeah. Not overrated. Underrated. Ocean's Eleven. Yes. Great movie. Absolutely. Die Hard. Oh, 100. Great movie. Yes. The Hangover. Yeah, never seen it. That's ridiculous. Brilliant. The Last Boy Scout. Such a great, bad movie. Never seen it. Bruce Willis, you never saw it? It's so cheesy, but great. The Big Lebowski. Never seen it. I want to see it. What? You know what? I want to see The Big Lebowski. I hope it hasn't been pumped up too much. Mike, it has. It has. The dude abides. Am I going to think it's stupid? Yes. You realize he's a character. I'm going to think it's stupid. No, it's not stupid. Am I going to think it's... Dude, I've tried. I've tried to like it because I like Jack Bridges. It's a Fairly Brothers. No, it's not Fairly Brothers. No, Coen Brothers. It's Coen Brothers. I'm not stoned enough to enjoy The Big Lebowski. You don't have to be stoned. Aren't you? The dude abides. It's a character. It's not a biopic. It is rated. It is not. Dude, I'm telling you, man.

3:12:37People, like, I've never met a person that saw The Big Lebowski that didn't think it was great. Not good. Great. He's the only one. You're looking at him. Only one. See, and I read it. I was reading this, and it's like, yeah, it was, you know, I was reading something, and it said it was Coen Brothers. And I was like, I didn't know that. Yeah. And it was describing this kind of goofy story, and I was like, that sounds kind of funny. Yeah. I was very excited for it when it came out. And then people came in, they were like, oh my god, I watched it three times this weekend. I was like, oh my god, are you kidding? Some of the humor that's used does not hit you over the head. It's a little bit like, you kind of have to think about it a little bit. I think you would get it, Mike. I gotta see it now. It hits you a second later. It's no footloose. Fair enough. Very few things are. The Godfather. Perfect movie. Absolutely. Perfect film. Yes, that is a perfect film. It's a perfect film. Another perfect film is Godfather 2, which I think is right up there with it. Back-to-back Oscars. Top Gun. Oh, yes. Don't like Top Gun. I think it's real cheeseball. Real cheeseball. Dumb and cheesy. The music is overwrought. Dude, nothing is dumber to me than the scene where Iceman is confronting him and he goes, and he bites. That's so dumb. I am dangerous.

3:14:04Dude, I'm embarrassed. I get embarrassed for Kilmer when he does that. It's the stupidest. To me, it's maybe one of the most overrated movies ever. Well, you were telling me how much you enjoyed the volleyball scene, so I thought maybe that's what you were going for. We talked about it for like 35 minutes. I have never, for the record, said. That I like the volleyball. Mikey, you said that you really admired Goose who left his shirt on during the volleyball scene the whole time. You thought that was cool. And you're always screaming out, take me to bed or lose me forever. Yes, you're always screaming that. You're being stirred. Yep. Your favorite scene. Take a seat. How dare you. You said it would be fun on 4th of July to get some dudes over to your place in your sand volleyball court and reenact that scene and just have fun with it.

3:15:06Isn't the Tommy Bahama enough? Well, it is a Tommy Bahama stand volleyball court. Girls just taking their bras off in the theater. Slow motion. He's in jeans. Who plays volleyball in jeans? Jeans and ripped abs. It looks like gay porn. That scene looks like gay porn. It looks like a gay porn is about to break out at 80 seconds. Like, hey, we were playing bug when a gay porn broke out. Well, if that's what gay porn looks like, then I like gay porn. Write that down. Oh, wow, wow, wow, wow. They forget anything on that list that you think? Yes. Swingers for me. Swingers. It's got to be on there.

3:16:16To me, it's really hard to reconcile how Apocalypse Now is not on a list of the 15 greatest guy movies ever. I think Apocalypse Now is the greatest. How is Goodfellas not on here? If Rebecca, something happened to her, would you in fact marry Apocalypse Now? I have four copies of the movie. You love it so much. True story. How about Platoon? I have the regular movie. I have the regular Apocalypse Now. I have Apocalypse Now redo. or Redux, I have Apocalypse Now, the full dossier, and now I have Apocalypse Now, the full dossier on Blu-ray. You're the sucker. Which, by the way, I am the sucker, and that Blu-ray edition of the final dossier, there's this thing that you can put on Amazon, if they ever make this movie into Blu-ray, please alert me. Nice. And that's what they did. That's how much I... I think it's my favorite film ever. I know that. Wow. Goodfellas up there? Yep. I think that there's some horror movies that should be good guy movies. I think Alien is a great guy movie. Never saw it. Oh, dude. It's a true statement. Intense. I never saw Alien. Oh, that girl's mocking me. I never saw it. He's so mad. Look at him. He's so confused.

3:17:48I'm confused and hurt. Is that like Caddyshack? I'm hurt. I'm sad. It's a great one, L.O.B. Hard to go back and watch Caddyshack. Not at all. Still holds up. So good. Why haven't you seen Alien? Why haven't I seen Alien? I don't know. I don't know, man. I really don't. Never saw it. Will you? No. Okay. Thanks for thinking about it. Yeah. Why is it that you asked me to see films and I... You don't see them. Made. Gone Baby Gone. 0 for 2 there. There was a couple more that you wouldn't see. Dumb and Dumber? Dumb and Dumber. I watched it. No, you didn't. Did. I bought it for you. No, we watched five minutes of it. Didn't play as well today. It plays perfectly today. Okay. Well, we'll agree to disagree. Okay. Are we missing any? M1, Harold from San Marcos. You guys know what I'm going to say. Over the top. Over the top, baby. You guys are a professional arm wrestler.

3:18:50That's a man's movie right there. Over the get. Yeah. Get the top. Over the never heard of. It's an arm wrestling movie featuring Sylvester Stallone. Over the get. You just killed me. Oh, dude. Listen, it's, it's, I think that that movie is a very funny movie. Yes. It's a little bit, it's kind of funny. It's Mikey-thon funny. It's a man's movie. All right. It's a man who likes arm wrestling's movie. Yes. Yeah, I'll give you that. Yes, thank you. M1 Matt from La Jolla. Mikey, how are you doing, bud? Good. Listen, in college, my buddy and I made a list, and the top two aren't on that list, and they were just, there's no way Woods is going to disagree with these. What? Number two in this order, Rudy. Oh, yeah. You can't love the little guy fighting for his life, and he comes out on top, and everybody's cheering for him. And number one, I mean, I don't get how this isn't on there, Field of Dreams. That's a guy movie? With his father. Yeah, that's a good one. I cry every time I watch it, every single time. Every time. Playing ball. Yep. This is a good one, and it's coming from a girl, and I think she's right. It's M1 Babe from Serena Valley. Hi, babe. Hey. Hey, babe.

3:20:16Hey, babe. Hey, babe. 300. 300. I never saw it. It's fantastic. Oh, my gosh. I never saw it. Shut your face. I never saw it. Shut your face. Spartans, lay down your weapons. Come and get them. Gladiator's up there for me. Yes. It's a freak. Braveheart. Braveheart. Gosh darn, I watch that movie a lot. That's a bloody movie. It is gory. And it's good. Have you ever seen it, Sienna? Braveheart, only a couple minutes. I know, I'm sorry. It's so good. You'd like it. It's one that I've been wanting and meaning to watch. It's a love story in it. I want to see it, I just haven't. See it on a Sunday afternoon. It's really good for a Sunday afternoon. Okay. I can't pay my wife, and I mean this. I couldn't give her an amount of money to get her to watch most movies that I enjoy. You couldn't get a lot of people. You couldn't pay a lot of people to watch.

3:21:16You're subtitled French foreign films. You know what's so funny about that is that I've suggested a lot of these films. And you call them films. Yes. And a lot of these films, a lot of these films, people have said, that's really good. Now, they're not smarty movies. Woods, I'm telling you, in fact, not only are they not smarty movies, a lot of them are very simple. Okay. Subtitled? Yes. Why? What am I, French? No. Yeah, there's plenty of good movies made over here I'll watch. You're an American that reads English. Yeah. Just read the subtitles. Yeah, then I can't see the screen. I can't see what's going on. Yeah, pick a medium. Is it a book or is it a movie? Yeah, book or movie. What are you? Gives me a headache. Yeah, it's a pain in the butt is what it is. And you're so fancy.

3:22:08Watching your subtitle movie with your clove cigarette. I feel like every word you guys say, it's like a top. It's a rubber band. You got a mint tulip you're drinking. Yeah, yeah. No, Ella, be a glass of Chianti and a clove. Yeah. And you're watching your subtitle movie. You have a pencil-thin mustache. Absolutely. And your wife's talking to you like, listen, I'm watching a film. Hey, did you make my espresso or what? Right, right. Sitting on a leather couch. Do we have any more scones? Do we have scones? Are we out of scones? We're out of freaking scones, aren't we? Can I just tell you? Woodsy, listen, I beg you. Yes, beg me. It would be like this. You would try this movie and you would go, holy cow. That's like, it tastes, it's the best fried chicken I've ever had. And I thought it was going to taste like some weird, you know, almost bouche with bouche au lait. And it doesn't. It's the best fried chicken I've ever had. I don't buy it because I think, you know, it was like Schindler's List. When Schindler's List came out, everyone said, oh, you don't even notice that it's in black and white. You don't. Five minutes in, I'm like, freaking movies in black and white. It's in black and white. It's in black and white. It's in black and white. It's in black and white. It's in black and white. I was losing my mind. Watched 10 minutes of one of the greatest movies apparently ever, and I'm like, I'm done. It's black and white. Bro, I'm an idiot. I'm sorry. Wait, but Schindler's, I've seen just like.

3:23:25All of humanity has seen Schindler's List one time. Nope. Couldn't make it. Okay, fine. Maybe not everybody's seen it. But the people that have seen it, including Steven Spielberg, he's seen it one time. You don't watch that movie over and over again. I own it. I'm not sure why. When am I going to break that out? Hey, guys. You guys want to play Boulder Dash or watch Schindler's List? It's just like Passion of the Christ, too. The subtitles was killing me. And I wanted to know that movie. I wanted to feel it like everybody else felt it. I made it half an hour, 45 minutes. I was like, I got to turn this off. I could get through that one. I couldn't. You didn't finish watching it? I know. I didn't finish Passion of the Christ. I'm a monster. Mikey just popped a spree. I'll give you $40 and cancel my... I'll give you $40. I'll give you $60. Don't say it. I'll give you $60 and cancel my appointment today. For what? Working in writer? Very important. Appointment. Workout? No, you work out, mister. Nah. I don't want to. Terrible. I thought I was going to have a good version of that. This is the Mikey Show. It's the best. That's right. It's the best. You think you got something worth adding? Are you going to be careful here with what you say? Call Mikey now. 570-1949. What is it? The Vatican? Or text them at 949Mikey at gmail.com. I got people too, baby. More coming up on FM 94.9.

3:25:03I'm test driving a BMW 3 Series today so I can see how it stacks up. And so far, I'm very impressed. What is up with this guy next to me? Oh, yeah. Get the sideways look. There's the old subtle chin tilt. Oh, and there it is. He wants to race me. No, no thank you. And it would be no contest. He must not know that the 3 Series is faster and more powerful than its rivals from Audi and Mercedes. And, don't ask me how, it's more fuel efficient than ever. He's really not getting the message. No, thank you. When you're the ultimate driving machine, great power comes with great responsibility. So, test drive a 3 Series as responsibly as you can at your local BMW center today. For a limited time, lease the BMW 328i sedan for $339 a month. Visit sdcountybmw.com slash finance for details. Guards are saving men from making the unmanly choice of drinking light beer with less taste. How? With great tasting Miller Lite, Taste Points, and awesome summer discounts. So man up at tastepoints.com today.

3:26:46California residents 21 or older. Boyd will prohibit. Limited time promotion will offer begins 5-1-11 and then 7-30-1-11. Full terms and conditions at tastepoints.com. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Great beer, great responsibility. Life's better with baseball. Okay, detailed inning-by-inning replays. Check. Reports from the dugout and clubhouse. Check. Complete MLB reports from around the league. Check, check, check. Mr. Tinky Dashboard Troll. You know, it's a good luck thing. Really. The Sequoia and Casino postgame show following most Padre games. Mr. Tinky. Hey, you never know, Johnny. You never know. The Padres are on the road, live from Seattle, 645 Friday. From the remotest corners of East County to the splendor of the Silver Strand. From the innovative entrepreneur to the triumphant competitor. Join us for the real San Diego stories that the local news stations simply don't have the time to tell. It's all about San Diego. And it's all right here on San Diego Insider Magazine. Don't miss the next debut edition of San Diego Insider Magazine, 6 p.m. Sunday exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego. Vons is celebrating the 4th with spectacular all-American daily deals now through the 4th of July. Today's daily deal, burgers and cheese. Today, only with Vons Club, 80% lean ground beef is only $197 a pound in the Extreme Value Pack.

3:28:14And craft singles are buy one, get one free. Selected varieties limit two. Come into Vons for new daily deals every day until the 4th. At Vons, we love summer, so we're going to help you make the most of it with fantastic prices all summer long. This week, our Vons Club specials are sure to put you in the holiday mood. Rancher's Reserve Beef New York Strip Steak Bone-In is only $4.47 a pound in the Extreme Value Pack. And get five years of sweet white or bicolor corn for just $1. 12 packs of Coca-Cola, Pepsi, or 7-Up cans are buy two, get three of equal or lesser value free. Plus, CRV in California must buy five, limit six free per transaction. At Vons, we're going to help you make every summer day a celebration. Vons, ingredients for life. Clarence collected cliches, so every day a new cliche was printed out on his HP printer. Then one day his ink ran out, so he ran like the wind and bought an HP multi-pack. No longer between a rock and a hard place, Clarence finally printed to his heart's content. And while some days were as busy as a bee and others were dead as a doornail, saving money always made Clarence a happy camper. After all, a penny saved is a penny earned. Print more and save up to 10% with everyday pricing with HP Multipacks, founded a retailer near you. HP, hit print. Compared to single standard HP and cartridges based on average retail pricing.

3:29:29It's time to celebrate. Fortune A's 4th of July sale is going on right now. You'll find great deals throughout the entire store. Save big when you take an additional 50% off already reduced men's, women's, and kids' clothing and shoes. Take an additional 25% to 50% off already reduced clearance, bikes, fitness, camping, fishing gear, and so much more. Plus, you can take 25% off select regularly priced gear, clothing, and shoes. This is something you don't want to miss. Innovative. Lots of words mean fresh. Add Mercedes-Benz to the list. That's because the 2011 lineup of Mercedes-Benz vehicles is the youngest and freshest in the luxury car class. Take the C300 sports sedan, a rare combination of luxurious refinement and racing pedigree. Its agility control suspension lets it handle with precision even when driven hard. See your authorized Mercedes-Benz dealer about the 2011 C300 sports sedan, and you'll discover that for 125 years, Mercedes-Benz has also been synonymous with value.

3:30:27Get the 2011 C300 Sport Sedan at 1.9% APR for 24 to 36 months, or lease one for just $349 a month for 33 months with $3,894 due at signing. A new year, a new level of innovation from Mercedes-Benz. Available only to qualified customers exclusively through Mercedes-Benz Financial Services and participating dealers through June 30, 2011. Call 1-800-FOR-MERCEDES for offer details. See your Mercedes-Benz dealer of San Diego County. Visit Hohen Motors in Carlsbad, Mercedes-Benz of Escondido, and Mercedes-Benz of San Diego. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I wouldn't like it. I'm not very attractive. Lauren. When I was in college, that was like my M.O. I would get drunk and steal random stuff. Woods. Oh, I want filth. I want straight filth as filthy as it can get. Sienna. Mine are always crying. I'm a crier. And Jay. I have a pond. I built a pond in my yard. On FM 94.9. You're such a miester. That was a good one. You got me. You almost had me. Fake stat? Fake stat. It's got fake stat in. Woods goes, aren't Mayans? They're Indians, right? And I go, no. I go, they're from Mexico. He goes, yeah, but aren't they the Mayan Indians? I go, no, you're thinking of Incas. And I stopped. For a second, he was like, you S.O.B. No, this is just saying it's Mayan Indians. Only Incan Indians. Oh, okay. I wish that I could, like, strap you to a chair.

3:32:12with your hands strapped to the chair and force you to watch these movies that I want you to see. Why so bad? Because this is what I know for a fact that a couple of them you'd be like, not my cup of tea. But most of them you would go, dude, that was badass. I feel the same way about music with you sometimes. I'm like, you have to listen to this. You're like, and then you're out. And it drives me. It drives me insane, so I guess I can see where you're coming from. I tried to play you Jeff Buckley, and you're like, oh, it's lame. I was like, oh, my God. Now, wait a minute. Is Jeff Buckley, now, is he super, like, he's pretty famous, though, right? Yeah, he passed away. They're making two movies about him this year, though. Yeah. I mean, he's a pretty big deal. Very, very talented guy with a voice that you just never hear, you know? You don't hear it at all anymore. Well, yeah, he's dead now. He's not here anymore, but. I think a movie is so different than this song. See, music to me, music, it's your movie. You know what I mean? It's the same thing. I'm going to recommend some movies to our listeners. Sky movies. Das Boot. Das Get. Really? Das Boot. Das Get. Das Boot. Okay. German? Oh, great. Das? It's about the German new boat. Directed by Wolfgang...

3:33:36Peterson. And a lot of action. Next. Amores Peros. Oh, that noise was Woods' head hitting the microphone. Incredible. Tried to watch that piece of ass with Mike one time over at his house. He didn't like it because there was dogs. Dogfight opening scene. Oh, Mike! It is five minutes of a two-hour and 20-minute film. Hey, Mike, I want you to watch this movie. It would be the devil in the first five minutes. I'm like, what? It's only five minutes of the devil. It's no big deal. You watch movies with murders. Yeah, that doesn't bother me as much as dogfighting. Write that down. That's very defining. It's a bold statement. Wow. The original La Femme Nikita. Do you watch American films? He's 100% Mexican. He won't see The Hangover, but you'll watch La Femme Nikita. You're fancy with your movies. You are so fancy. The Professional. Decent. I saw it. Decent. Badass. Decent. The Station Agent. Great movie. Who's in it? Peter Dinklage. Oh, Peter Dinklage. Oh, Peter Dinklage is in it. Thank goodness. He did make that guy. Did you show us Dinklage? Yeah.

3:35:09Dinklage. I don't want to hear about Peter's Dinklage, okay? He's a little person. No way. Oh, man. It's great. I think I know what you're talking about. It's great. It's an American film. Yeah, it is. Boondock Saints. Lame. Oh, the best movie out there. It's okay. It was all right. I loved it. It was okay. It was way overrated, though. 13 Assassins. Japanese. Yes. Subtitles. It's incredible. All right, that's it. How about Platoon or Full Metal Jacket? I thought Platoon was a piece of garbage. It won an Academy Award for Best Picture. Full Metal was really good. Yeah, half of it. The first 45 minutes are great. And then it's the worst movie I've ever seen. Let's see. Live in July. Every single day we're on the air in July. Live studio audience. You want to come? Just let us know. That's all you got to do. Just go to the website. Sign up. We'll get you in here.

3:36:14I told you that we were going to tell you about this guy trying to charge his cell phone. Sienna, what happened? Oh, my gosh. This poor homeless man in Maine. He apparently had a cell phone and charged it in an outdoor electrical outlet. And a police officer who was checking a downtown business saw the phone charging in the outdoor outlet, found the homeless man who owned it. It was a 23-year-old guy and arrested him. Why? Just because he was charged in the wrong place? Because, well, he was charged last week with theft of services. Oh. As well as carrying a concealed weapon because the officer found a folding knife tucked under his shirt. Oh, wow. But that's like a pocket knife. You can't have a pocket knife? Yeah, you can. I know. Like, now he's in trouble for that, too. It's like... Theft of service. He was charging a fold. Now he's got a place to stay. Would that happen to all of us? No. I doubt it. You're right. I doubt it. It's lame. It's pretty lame. He's probably got a better place to stay now. You're probably right. He's got TV. He didn't before. Three hots and a cot, pal. That's ridiculous. He could have done something worse to have that place to stay. Yeah. And he gets to be somebody's wife. I'm sure he's not in prison. Hey, don't bend over for the soap, homeless guy. Hey.

3:37:33I hope the dude that's sleeping on the top bunk doesn't get you in your bum. That's right. Hey, are you wearing the old radio station t-shirt? That we gave you. Bet you are. Bet you are. Bet you wish you had a nice house like I do. You don't got no wife like me. Can't make love like I can. Not the air conditioner on. You haven't made wise investment choices like I have. Oh, well. Anyway. Get. Get out of here. Scram. You beat it. Shoo fly. Get. Let me tell you something. If I come back here and you're still here, I'm going to rub it in some more. And I mean it. You think I'm kidding? You think I have a problem kicking a dog with them? Well, I don't. I mean, I seriously, I kick dogs when they're down. Beat dead horses. That's right. Mikey now. 570-1949.

3:38:58Text them at 949mikey at gmail.com. More coming up on FM 94.9. When he holds a shell up to his ear, he hears adult contemporary hits of the 90s. His monkey business is the official business he conducts with primates. The dinner he made last night was delicious. Ask anyone. Even if he was the only person left on Earth, mankind would still have a chance. He finds squirrels untrustworthy. If he were to say, it's not you, it's me, he'd be lying. He figure skates, and it is glorious. The most interesting man in the world. Don't always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis. Enjoy Dos Equis responsibly. Imported by Cervezas Mexicanas, White Plains, New York. Stay thirsty, my friend. Ultimate Fighting Championship presents UFC 132 Cruise vs. Faber.

3:40:08Phantomweight champion Dominic Cruz will attempt to avenge the only loss of his career in a rematch against former WEC featherweight champion, the California kid, Uriah Faber. Also, former pride middleweight champion Vanderlei Silva battles four-time knockout of the night winner, Chris the Crippler. Plus, the Huntington Beach bad boy Tito Ortiz will go to war with one of the most powerful fighters in the division, Ryan Bader. Tito says, let's fight him. And the natural-born killer, Carlos Condit, is set to take on undefeated welterweight powerhouse Dong Hyun Kim. Bud Light Lime presents UFC 132 Cruise vs. Favor, live Saturday, July 2nd, only on pay-per-view. Visit UFC.com for details. Order using your Cox remote control by tuning to channel 501 or in HD on channel 798 after 5.30 p.m. on Saturday. Enjoy the fight. Everybody likes to see a clean car or truck. But it's the oil you can't see that benefits most from being clean. Changing your oil and filter before they get dirty helps keep your vehicle running right. For most models, that's every three months or 3,000 miles.

3:41:21Changing the oil is the single most important thing you can do for your vehicle. Keep it clean with the top-name brands at low prices from the helpful professional parts people at the O'Reilly Auto Parts store near you. Stop in and save on your next oil change with 5 quarts of Castrol GTX motor oil and a Fram filter for only $18.99. Get maximum protection against thermal breakdown and sludge at a great price with a Castrol oil and Fram filter special only $18.99 at O'Reilly Auto Parts, the official auto parts store of NASCAR. Better parts, better... prices every day. Limit supply. See store for details. I'm sitting in C23D on a 1030 flight to Omaha to visit my family. But the drink cart is nowhere in sight, and I really want a Coke. I'm suppressing the urge to hit the call button. Suppressing the urge. Wait for the drink cart. Ah! My subconscious just made me reach up and hit the call button. Can I get you something, sir? Um, I'm sorry about this. I didn't mean to hit the call button, but since you're here... Could I get an ice cold Coke, please? Oops. Sorry. My subconscious is very thirsty. No worries. I'll be right back with your Coke. Just ignore me. I think it just wants peanuts, too. Family meal time is a lot like summer. It never lasts long enough. So keep your family at the table a little longer by preparing a great summer meal.

3:42:48And don't forget to stop by your local Stater Brothers and pick up lots of refreshing ice-cold Coca-Cola. Summer's over before you know it, but there's still plenty of time to gather around the table with ice-cold Coke. Coca-Cola, open happiness. Coca-Cola, open happiness. When fun refuses to call it a night, it can only be called fun-tenuous. As for such fun-tenuous nights, Dave and Buster has created Late Night Happy Hour. Half-price drinks Sunday through Thursday, 10 p.m. to close. Imagine playing, drinking, eating, then playing again. It's fun looped to infinity times forever. What's that sleep? Can't hear you. We're too busy being awesome. Late night happy hour at Dave & Buster's. The only place to eat, drink, and play. Go to DaveAndBuster's.com for details, hours, and locations. In brightest day, in blackest night, no evil shall escape my sight. Let those who worship evil's might... Beware my power. Green Lantern First Flight. Six Flags introduces Green Lantern First Flight, America's first vertical spin coaster. Save $25 at SixFlags.com. Now, the most coasters on the planet. Go big. Go Six Flags Magic Mountain.

3:44:01It's time to celebrate. Sportulae's 4th of July sale is going on right now. You'll find great deals throughout the entire store. Save big when you take an additional 50% off already reduced men's, women's, and kids' clothing and shoes. Take an additional 25% to 50% off already reduced clearance, bikes, fitness, camping, fishing gear, and so much more. Plus, you can take 25% off select regularly priced gear, clothing, and shoes. This is something you don't want to miss. Sportulae. Okay, honey, I booked a great hotel on Expedia, and we got a $50 prepaid MasterCard gas card. 50 bucks? Woo-hoo! See if the neighbors can beat that. Bucks in gas! How you like me, Matt Henderson? Yeah, well... Bow your lawn. Oh, you should, hon. Get a $50 prepaid MasterCard gas card when you book with your MasterCard during Expedia's My Summer is Better Than Your Summer Sale. Where you book matters. Expedia. Minimum stay required and subject to availability. Book by July 4th. Travel by August 31st. Terms and restrictions apply. See site for full details. This July 4th, stop by Lowe's and buy one 16-pound bag of Kingsford charcoal, and we'll give you one for free. To the Mikey Show. With Mikey. Liberals drive me nuts. Most of the time.

3:45:12I will always say that. Liberals drive me nuts because of how conservative I am. Lauren. Yeah, you call me thrifty. I call me smart. Cheap. Woods. I was kind of the class clown in high school, if you guys can imagine. Sienna. My biggest pet peeve is when people go... When they chill. Ah, it drives me nuts. And Jay. I'm a salt aficionado. On FM 94.9. Yeah, holy cow, holy cow, holy cow, holy cow. You ever use one song for three breaks? Listen. Wow. You're going to make me feel bad. Too late. I'm having a bad day. Wow. You're not. I am. It's not bad. You're just thrown off a little. It stays off. I'm not sure why. I have, you know, everybody's entitled to, you know, have a bad day, right? Or not. Or, you know. Anyway. Should I play a song or? I don't know.

3:46:26You're overthinking it. It's K-Wave 97 FM. Tonight's 8 o'clock album. Normal Barkley! An odd couple. Rude things we do at the beach. Throw our butts. Oh, cigarette butts? Yes. Yeah. Took me a second. Yeah, it took me a second too. Probably go to the bathroom. Not on the list, but what do you mean? I'm sure guys go wee-wee out on the beach when they're drunk. Yeah, they do. Mainly just go in the water. Yeah. Smoke. Well, that's the butts, though, right? Even smoking. Oh, boy. Public drunkenness is on this list of annoying, rude things people do at the beach. This is also by the... I have never been drunk on a beach once, FYI. Sit right next to you. Why are you wearing a T-shirt that says, I like to get drunk on the beach? There's pictures of you with a sombrero over your face. Yeah.

3:47:55How come there's a picture? You're buried in the sand. You with a bottle of Jack and for some weird reason you have a belt around your forehead like it's a bandana. A leather belt. I wish. Somebody's drawn the male genital along your face. Oh my God. Chris just had a look on his face like, oh gosh, what just happened? Oh my God. Chris's faces are the best. Chris's face sometimes is like... Did you guys hear that? I just heard a car crash. It's like that kind of deal. Was that an earthquake? Was that an earthquake or Jay just said something weird? No one's guessed the number one most rude thing people do at the beach. Fart. No, play their music loud. Number one. That is annoying. Hey, Kid Rock!

3:48:49Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ball with the ball. I got it, pal. All right? Cool. Cowboys. Yeah. The top is going down. Yeah, I got it. It's great. It was great 10 years ago. Repeat it again. Sublime's a big player at the beach here. What's up, Bad Fish? You want to turn that down a little bit? Hey, Ruka. Yeah, Santeria. Cool, man. Another rude thing is invading people's personal space. You know those people that just set their beach towel right next to you? That's what I said. Right next to you. Why would someone do that? Because they're insane. Call us if you set your beach towel next to someone. They're nosy. If there's room and you don't have to. You're nosy. I want to know if anyone's actually asked a stranger to help them put sun lotion on. Oh, wow. People do that? I've gotten that bit. What? From a dude? I get that and I get the help with the wetsuit all the time. And you want to feel like you're an American and you're like, hey.

3:49:46I want to help you out. You know, I don't want to feel like a bad. Meanwhile, they're recording every part of your body image. Sometimes you just can't get out of your way. Yeah, it's true. But the sunblock is disgusting. That's filthy. You don't ask a stranger to rub you down. There's nothing worse than putting sunblock on top of a sweaty person. You have to like love them in order to put sunblock on them. What about at Black's Beach when the guy is excited? What? Because that happened to my friend. Excuse me, miss. Can you put this on me? No. She said yes, and then things got weird. Wow. That's when. There we go. And then he just jumped off the diving board and went for a swim. Oh, my God. Do I make you horny, buddy? Do you guys think it's rude when a woman goes topless at the beach? No. No. It's totally fine.

3:51:07Some people apparently do think it's rude. That's not rude at all. But 78% say it's okay. It's not rude. It's fine. It's not rude. She looks like the lady from Something About Mary. Yours are bigger. That's rude. That's rude. You mean like when they're laying down and undo it? No. Nobody really walks around. I didn't order any sliders. I've seen women go topless on beaches that are not topless. All the way in. Yeah. Hallelujah. No problem. Yeah, that's called a miracle. Hallelujah. It's called a miracle. Hallelujah. It's called hitting the jackpot. Yeah. Go to the beach, go for a surf. Oh, wow. That's a nice little treat for me. Happy birthday. What are you talking about? Like, they're not topless, but they're topless? What does that mean? They're topless. They're topless. They don't have a top on. I've never seen that. Really? Wait, you've been to like PB and there's a girl walking around with no bikini top? Tamarack. Yes. I've seen it probably ten times. What are you talking about? Oh, yeah. Yes, I've seen it. I saw it once last year, Jamie and I. Topless girl at Tamarack Beach, all the way in. Woods, you mean topless and laying on a towel. No. I mean walking around. Walking around, yes. I want to hear from one human being that's ever done that. And I promise I will not. I think she was laying. This girl's laying on her back. There's really no big deal.

3:52:26No, I've seen them walking around. It's just breasts. I've got them, you've got them. That's a really big deal. How come yours can be showed? Well, first of all, I don't. But you could. For that reason, because it's rude. Why can a man's be shown and a woman's can't? Because a man's chest is not... A woman's chest. Oh. Okay. So. Jay, don't act like you don't know that those are the rules. He knows the rules. They're just stupid rules. What if your daughter Maddie was walking around topless? What if she walked in here right now topless? But it isn't. But it should be. But it's not. Why don't you talk Maddie? Liberty, Kim. I'm not going to have any luck with that, but I thought I'd start with these two girls and then go out from there. You should go to Capitol Hill and start lobbying. I'm going to do it. I want to see some teas at the beach. Everybody's got nipples. Can we milk you? I sweat that. I sweat that. I sweat it. And one Dawn from San Diego. Hi. I just wanted you guys to retract one of the things you said. What is that? Smoking on the beach. It's been banned. Surfrider Foundation and a lot of organizations have worked around it. We know it's been banned, but that doesn't stop people from doing it.

3:53:42Yeah, but you should note that, though, so people don't think it's legal. Well, no, no, no, no, no, Don. I don't think that we were... I don't think we were waving the flag of, hey, smoke on the beach. I think we were letting people know that it's something very rude to do. It's gross. Definitely. I definitely agree. But I'm just saying that, you know, with your comments, you know, you got to be careful because... Some people tune in, hear that, and think, oh, smoking at the beach. You know what? I try to accept a lot of things. That one I can't accept. I really feel that's a stretch. Honestly, Dawn, I'm being really honest with you. I think that's a stretch. This is a list that came out, and we got the list, and we wanted to read what the list was of the rudest things people do on the beach. I think it's very rude when people smoke on the beach, and I don't feel... that it's irresponsible to say that. And I don't think in any way we advocate the smoking on the beach by announcing that it's rude.

3:54:46comment of saying, hey, you're not even allowed to smoke at the beach. Not even in the same universe. I respectfully disagree with you. I don't even think it's in the same zip code. And I'm one of those guys that, you know, when you tell me something like that, I want to go, hey, listen, you're right about that. I apologize. I think you're so wrong. I think you're so wrong. And I think it's irresponsible of you to call and say, I think that's and I think it's extraordinarily odd. I really do. To take the point of it's rude to smoke on the beach and take it to the extent of that we're condoning smoking on the beach. even though we know it's illegal and that in some way we're inciting some sort of smoking riot onto the beaches of San Diego. I think that that's odd. I do. I think it's odd and irresponsible. You're a little dramatic. I think you're a little dramatic. Don, if I told a story about a car accident that happened, would I need to say, by the way, it's illegal to drive over the speed limit of 65 miles per hour? Absolutely. It's kind of, you know, I don't need to say it. It goes without saying.

3:55:46And Don, I see people smoke on the beach all the time. You're missing my point highly. No, we're not. We get your point. And it was the point of your point that made me go, really? Question mark? No, three question marks. Really? With three question marks? Like, we're on the radio trying to make a point of an irresponsible point of it's rude to smoke on the beach. And by the way, all of you out there, we're not pointing out that it's illegal anymore. So we're letting you know, go smoke on the beach. Light them up if you got them. Have a bowl. Smoke them if you got them. Smoke them if you got them. I was at the beach last weekend and there was a guy with a hookah set up next to the lifeguard stand. No way. And the lifeguard's there. And I'm like, really? A hookah? A hookah. And all they're sitting around with their... Was he smoking tobacco though? Yeah, they were smoking tobacco. Maybe they weren't sure what to do because it wasn't a cigarette. But it's glass. You can't have glass on the beach. I don't know if it was glass or not. When I go to the beach and I want to smoke, I go to my car. Dawn? Yes? You've gotten the word out. You know, you've definitely gotten the word out. And so, you know, thumbs up. I still love you, Dawn.