The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 07/29/10

0:00KBCT San Diego, a Lincoln Financial Media station. The new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. Welcome to the program. It's The Mikey Show. It is Thursday. That happened fast. It did. Later on when our weather girl Sabrina comes in, she'll tell you this, but a lot of you may be at work, so I'll tell you now. Weather is going to be getting real nice around these parts. It's summertime. Oh, yeah. Don't you break my heart. I've heard this one before. From what I, from, you know, talk, what do they say? The word around the camp? Word around the campfire. Campfire. Word around the campfire is that no matter where you are in the county, by Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, you're going to have some nice, like, up in the 70s, nice and sunny, perfect weather.

3:48It's about time. It's August. It's nice that it can hit 70. Can you believe that? I'm telling you. God loves me right now. Me and my pregnant self. Somebody said your mom paid off the weather. I told my mom, look, I need you to give Mother Nature a call. Let her know I'm extremely hot even though it's freezing outside. What a chilly summer. Unbelievable. My mom made it real right. Oh, my goodness. Welcome to the program. My name is Mikey. I barely go by that, though. Everyone calls me Mike. I call you Mike sometimes. I call you Michael. You do. You do, Wolfgang. But nobody calls me that but you. You're the only one that's allowed to call me. What about your mother and M1 Vubi? Yeah. Yes. You and M1 Vubi are the only ones that call me Michael. My mom, my mom even calls me Mikey. Yeah. So everybody, I guess, calls me something different. What about the people from the Life commercial? They call me Mikey. They definitely call me Mikey. I heard somebody call my wife Becky yesterday. Oh, boy. How weird is that? That's what she went by, though, right? So she used to go by.

5:09Becky. She's so not a Becky. She's not a Becky. She's a Rebecca. And we've gone through that. Like, I call Woodsy Steve and it skeeves him out. Skeeves him out. Even when you say Lauren now instead of L-O-B, I'm like, who? Yeah. If I write you an email and I say Lauren, it's pretty serious, right? It means business. It means we're serious talking. The name Steve is a porn name. No, it's not. That's what it sounds like to me. Hey, Steve. I imagine I'd have like a mustache. It's your name. Millions of Steves. I like it. It's your name. Really? Yeah. See, I'd like to call you that sometimes, but I can't, you know, because you get mad. Yeah. When I talk to your wife, I'm like, Steve. Me too. Me too. She says Steven. Yeah. And I feel so, I feel disrespectful when I'm talking to Jamie Woods' wife and I say Woods. Exactly. I do. I like force myself. Yeah. I try to avoid saying his name because I don't know what to say. I know. But if I say Steven, I feel gay. So, Steven. I know I feel like an imposter. This is the last time I ever called him Steven. I'm like, so your husband. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, let's introduce everybody. If you're new to listening to the show, I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the program. And I'm Mexican-American, but you'd never know it.

6:36I'm the whitest sounding Mexican you've ever heard in your life. You're a coconut. I'm a coconut. Self-proclaimed coconut. I am. Brown on the outside, white on the inside. Woodsy is our sports guy, and he is 35. Yes. And Lauren is our flaxen-haired assistant producer to my right. She's the blondie. Sienna is our auburn-haired. Nice. News girl. She's 25. And Jay is our sandy blonde. He's the guy in the other room. Stop it, Mickey. He's the guy in the other room. He's 47. He's our producer. And Chris is in today screening some phone calls for us. You want to get on the line, call us right now. 570-1949. Or you can open up your phone and text us up. 949mikey at gmail.com. Our good friend and comedian, Mal Hall, will be coming into the studio later on. Be with us at 9. I'm so excited to see him. I'm convinced Mal is going to be a star. Oh, anyone who's seen him is convinced of that. Yeah, he's a pretty talented cat. Yeah. And he's a sharp cat. So when you're good looking and you're funny, he's got the makings to be a star. And I meant Mal. Oh, sorry.

8:08I got more Padres Marlins tickets at 7 o'clock this morning. What's the deal with the immigration law, Sienna? Because I don't understand it. The Arizona immigration law, well, it was supposed to go into effect today. And we all know what it was about, right? Yeah. Basically, cops in Arizona could pull over anyone, you know, for... something that they had done wrong in their car and had asked for to see their legal papers. And people thought, you know, that that's racial profiling and the Obama administration got involved and it turned into a federal battle as well over the state battle. So yesterday they were in court and just hours before the law was supposed to take effect, the judge blocked major parts of the Arizona immigration law. So the main issue was the... You know, the provisions that she blocked were requiring police to check a person's immigration status while enforcing other laws. So people can't do that. Really? Yeah. So now when you pull somebody over in Arizona, you can't ask them to see their papers. You cannot. Okay.

9:14I thought that, okay, so nothing's changed. It's the exact same way it used to be. Yeah, I mean, basically it looks like it. She did allow a ban on local governments having sanctuary cities, which local governments limit enforcement of federal immigration laws. So there are ways, but you can't just pull someone over and while they're pulled over and they look like they could. be an illegal immigrant, ask to see their papers. Here's Jan Brewer. You don't meet a lot of Jans. That's not the most popular baby name in 2009. No, she's the governor of Arizona. She's the governor of Arizona. Here she is talking about it, about what happened yesterday. I will continue to consult with my lawyers throughout the day, and we will move forward after we get our arms totally around this. I would assume that we would be temporarily working hard and moving. forward with my legal team to see what it is that we are going to appeal. But we are going to continue to request that we... Okay, great. How many ums? Basically, she said it's a temporary bump in the road. She's not done. She's going to fight on. Yeah. I saw some really hateful Facebooks yesterday. Like what? Oh, just...

10:25racial, like, oh, like one I saw was like, oh, I guess now Speedy Gonzalez and Jose Cuervo can just come and go as they please. I was like, whoa. No, I mean, stuff like that obviously does not need to be said. It was awful, dude. I was like, really? This is what we've stooped to at this point in our lives? I just, to me, it's really, look in the mirror, Mexico, and how you are in your country. It just makes me mad. Yeah, well, and Listen, that's the lowest common denominator right there. That's just somebody that didn't get it. Brutal. But that is, you know, I don't think that that's indicative of the people that are behind the law. I know, but still, geez, the spirit of it. The spirit of it? I don't think the spirit of it is racist. I think people are misinterpreting the spirit of it is what's happening. Yeah, dummies. I think that people that are both sides, I think on both sides, I think that dummies on one side who want to be racist are like, Yee-haw! That sounds great, man. That sounds great. Get some Mexicans out of here, Speedy Gonzales. And then I think on the other side, there are dummies who go, this is absolutely racist. And this is wrong, and I cannot believe that we're doing this. And so there's two different types of dummies on both sides. It's just you have to think, in my opinion at least, that they are here illegally. If you were in another country illegally, you'd be dealing with the same thing. Why is it different? Yeah.

11:54I think that the spirit of the law, first of all, comes from a place that is experiencing a lot of really, really bad crime and influx of illegal immigrants that are using a lot of resources. And they want to do something about it. And the federal government's not helping. They're going, can you help us out here? Can you spend gajillions of dollars? I don't know, maybe build a good fence or something. I don't know. Can you do something? And the federal government goes, no, we can't. And so Arizona goes, well, then we're going to do something. We have to. We have to do something. We've been screaming about it. We've got to do something. So they do what they're doing, and then you've got people that think they're racist, and you've got people that, I don't know. I just wonder if a lot of this perceived.

12:46racism is coming from the fact that, especially in these southwestern states that are close to the border here, there's such a huge Hispanic population. So you have people that either were born and raised here, but are of Hispanic descent, or you have people that went through the right processes, did all that, and they still feel like they're going to be pulled over and hassled and put through the ringer when, you know, they didn't do anything wrong. Right. Yeah, but they're not allowed to just be pulled over by the way they look. But I think maybe this... They're thinking that this law implies that because of the way they look, they can be pulled over. You know what, though? I'm just going to throw this out there. That cop, okay? That cop, meaning the cop that wants to pull the dude over because he's brown and he don't like him and he's like, I'm going to mess with a Mexican. That cop would have been doing it before this law anyway. Well, it's just the whole one bad apple, you know? Sure. You hear one story of someone. getting hassled or going through you know like i said going through the ringer when they didn't do anything wrong and all of a sudden that sets the standard for what this new law allows you know police to do i just think you have to give the benefit to the cop to not do something like that and hope that they're not going to do that because like mike said that guy's already doing it now if it is if he is a guy that's going to do something like that so

14:09They're not just going to pull over someone based on what they're looking like. Let's hope because that's what the law says. They have to do something wrong in order to be pulled over in the first place. For shizzle. For shizzle. Oh, wow. 570-1949. For reals. Something that I probably have no business saying for shizzle. You know what? I'm going to go for it. Not probably. I shouldn't. I shouldn't. I don't think anyone should. I type it. Is that correct? Of course it counts. A lot of things that I'll type on Facebook or email that I don't even say. Push shizzle is one of them. I'm on Jeremy from Claremont Mesa. Hey, good morning. How are you guys doing? Good, man. All right, check it out. Look, this isn't about racism. I mean, you guys are hitting it on the nose. It's not about racism. It's not about, you know, Speedo Gonzalez and all this other stuff. All right, it's about protecting the resources of Arizona, just like you said. You know, we're spending a lot of money to feed these people. I didn't mean to sound like that, but, you know, here it is. You know, we spend a lot of money to feed these people. They come over and, you know, there's a lot of them that contribute. Hospitals, yeah. Yeah, there's a lot of them that contribute. And, you know, there's some good people. I've met them, I've known them. Yeah. But there's a lot of people that aren't. Yeah. Hey, thanks for the call. I appreciate it. And I get the sentiment and I get it.

15:33I mean, it's just really difficult because there's a lot of people that want to jump to the racist conclusion. It's a very touchy subject. When I went to Australia, I had to go through the legal process and I couldn't just go in and use the doctors and do all that. And I didn't feel like when I was over there, I was entitled to it. I'm like, I need to make sure I go through the right procedures in order to be able to have access to this. In Mexico, maybe you make a place people want to stay in. Yeah. You have a bunch of Americans. Going, I've got to, I have to find another American that I can give $3,500 to that can somehow get me to Mexico. I want to pay $3,500 or two grand or whatever it is for somebody to somehow just get me out of this America and get me into Mexico. The land of the free, the home of the brave, where I can make a good living. I don't know. You can fix your country up, Mexico. I'm still just hurt and annoyed by when the Mexican president came up and was talking to Obama and just basically saying how disgusting the Arizona law was and how, you know, and you even read on the air the list of laws dealing with immigration in Mexico, Mike. Oh, yeah. And it's like you're telling me that if I was driving around in Mexico by myself, I wouldn't get pulled over based on what I look like. It's happened. It's happened. And we're extorted. Yeah.

16:56Federales will pull you over and they'll be like, yeah, you want 400 bucks cash and we'll let you go. And that's why it's just like... A bunch of pot plants were seized in San Diego on like... City property or something? 350 marijuana plants worth as much as $1.4 million yesterday morning were confiscated from a grove over by the Westfield North County shopping mall in Escondido. Really? Yeah. They were just growing it? Right off to the side. Over there, there's an evergreen nursery, Big Trees Nursery. Yeah. And I guess it was like right off next to it, next to the 40 acre property, which is city owned. They went in there, the cops, and they found all of these plants. There's some that are a foot high, eight feet high marijuana plants. Wow. I know. What? Nice crop. Yeah. Yeah. The DEA got involved. They dressed head-to-toe in camouflage, wearing gloves and bandanas. And 10 agents hiked through the brush and pulled up each plant that they found. And it was over a million dollars worth of marijuana. My aunt, she used to stick weed in...

18:05bottles of rubbing alcohol and she would put it on her joints and it would relieve her joints. Not her joints. Her elbow. Different kind of joint. I didn't know that it worked that way. My old Aunt Mary. Old Aunt Mary. It's an old Mexican tradition. She used to take it right off the plant. It was a snip of it. She grew in our backyard. She lived with us. Well, we lived with her, actually. It's her house. In the backyard, she had one plant. She didn't do anything illegal with it. She didn't smoke it. It's illegal to grow it. Well, yeah, it's illegal to grow it. She didn't do anything. She wasn't doing it because she liked to get high. She was an old lady. She liked the salve. Yeah, and she would take a bottle of rubbing alcohol from Long's Drugstore, and she'd snip off the plant, stick it in there, put the cap on, shake it up, and it would just sit there underneath. you know, the sink, and then she'd take a cotton ball, take some of that rubbing alcohol, and she'd put it on her... She had parts of her body that really ached. Yeah. Wow. And she'd rub it on there and it would give her relief. That's hysterical. Maybe I'd try that for my shoulder. Yeah. Well, listen, pot is definitely... There's no doubt about it. There is medicinal purposes for pot. There's no doubt about it. Right. You know, the thing that I think is disgraceful...

19:34is pretending that you have an ailment so that you can get high. I think that's stupid. It's against the law, and I'm not for stuff that's against the law. You know what? Beer is 50 billion times worse than pot, in my opinion. Only thing is, it's legal. You know? That's a deal. And I'm not for making things that are already illegal. I'm not for making them legal. I think we have enough things. and vices and stuff that are legal right now. But they did that for alcohol during Prohibition. They made it legal again. I know they did. And you're fine with it now that it's legal. Hey, bro, no. The only reason I'm, finger quotes, fine with it is it's a legal thing. It isn't illegal. And if I had been alive during the days, if they were voting on it and saying, hey, should we make this highly addictive thing that people are going to drink and then get behind the wheels of their car and possibly kill kids? Should we make this legal? I would have said, are we nuts? Hello, are we nuts to do this? This is an absolutely wrong idea. Prohibition must continue. That's what I would have said on the radio. It should be freedom of choice, though. I mean, that's what it's all built on is freedom of choice. And then all the medicinal benefits of marijuana, weed, Mary Jane. Yeah. Hey, dude, listen, I'm all for the medicinal purposes of it. In fact, man, I wish what they would figure out, we could, like I said.

21:00We got 9000 channels on direct TV. We can't figure out how to make pot into a pill. Right. You know, I just don't. What I don't. Inhalers. Yeah. I mean, what I don't want and what I'm not for is drugs and drug use. I'm not for it. And and I think it's I think it's lame. The argument of, well, Mikey, that's kind of lame, dude. If I want to get high, I want to get high. No, it's stupid. And you know what? I don't want my freaking kid getting high either. And I don't want my freaking kid seeing you getting high. So he wants to get high. Well, the thing is, the thought of walking into a 7-Eleven and buying a pack of joints is pretty weird to me. It is. And I'll say it. I would say that I lean towards the, I would say careful regulation and legalization of marijuana. Seriously, I do. But because it can help. But it's like anything in moderation. I mean, there's a lot of drugs out there that people take. Xanax. Adderall, Vicodin that are legal. But dude, you can abuse the hell out of those drugs. You can abuse anything. Oh yeah, man. Pain pills are like the most abused thing in the world right now to have medicinal purposes, you know, and I'm a hundred percent in agreement for it. But if there was a law that was like, Hey guys, how do you feel about selling codeine at seven 11? I'd be like, get out of here. I think we all feel that way. You know what I mean? And that's what we're saying about. That's what we're knocking around with pot.

22:29Well, pie, you legalize it and then all of a sudden there's like a revenue stream because people are doing it. I mean, I know. How about revenue stream with Coke? Even higher. How about my kombucha? Bring it back. Bring it back. For gosh sakes. Got booze in it. Jersey Shore season two kicks off tonight. Never seen an episode, but from what I hear, it is popular. Very, very popular. I've never seen an episode either, but. Man, do people go nuts over this show. I'm annoyed. A group of guys and girls from the East Coast. Some of them are from what? Long Island. New York. Long Island. Long Island. Long Island. Staten Island. Strong Island. Well, they met up in... And hung out at the Jersey Shore and had, it was like a real world TV show, you know, reality show. And now they're doing season two. Same group. I think there's one new girl that's been added to the cast, but this time they're in Miami. They are. Which is clearly not the Jersey Shore. Yeah, Jersey Shore. But it's still called the Jersey Shore. In Cleveland. Yeah. Yeah, Jersey people in Dallas. Right.

23:31Here is the governor of New Jersey, Chris Christie, on the Today Show talking about it. You took on the Jersey Shore, not the geographic location, but the television show. You said that the show is negative for New Jersey. Now, I get the whole governor wrecking ball thing and taking on teachers is one thing. Taking on Snooki and the situation? Well, listen. Snooki and the situation are New Yorkers, as you know. Is that true, Snooki? Yes, I told you that. From New York? They're not even from New Jersey. I told you none of them are from New Jersey. Why do they call it the Jersey Shore? Because they go down there. Oh, they go down there to party. Yes. They're giving, I agree, $1,025. 0.2% with the governor of New Jersey. Oh, wow. Yes. This is one of the things that Lauren has been very outspoken on. Yes. And believes very strongly. Because it's giving, Jersey Shore is one of my favorite places in the world. And they're giving it such a bad name. Oh, when I think of it now? Yeah. I think of it as like, yeah. Yeah, exactly. And there are absolutely parts of the coastline.

24:39There are small little towns that are like that, but they're giving the overall geographic location such a bad name. The matter is, they parachute all these people from New York onto the Jersey Shore, and then they say this is New Jersey. It's not New Jersey, and if you want to come to the Jersey Shore, six, seven weeks left in summer, let's go. I'll show you the real Jersey Shore. Some people are saying that they're good for the economy in the towns along the Jersey Shore, that they've increased tourism. You're a guy who needs money in your state. Yeah, listen, we'll find other ways to increase tourism. If you take Snooki in the situation, you could have him back. Wow. I couldn't agree more. I'll do something else, you know. All of a sudden, you're dumping him on me? That guy is awesome. I don't have problems here. I mean, $11 billion deficit, I've got to take Snooki in the situation also? Come on. So much a man can take, man. Good for you, bro. I know. Good for you. I love it. What San Diego Charger is now going to be with the organization until the year 2015. What's he going to tell you next? What's on sports? Mikey Show now. 570-1949.

26:02Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. You don't want to miss your chance to hit the surf and have sand stuck in your butt all day. That's how we say hello. At the FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. The party at the beach is coming August 29th at the Oceanside Pier Amphitheater. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Miller Lite and Sion. Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros. Rogue Wig. The Wigs. And the Delta Spirit. As by local 94.9 stage. The silent comedy. The nervous records. The burning of Rome. And white apple tree. Get your tickets for 30 bucks today. No service fees or extra charges. Get them online at fm949sd.com or independencejam.com. Eight vans at the beach. Get tickets and join the party. August 29th in Oceanside. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Honest Tea. It's big. Big on performance. Big on fuel efficiency. Big on safety. Big on fun. Big on the kind of unique good looks that turn heads and impress friends. About the only thing that isn't big about the Mini is, well, the Mini itself. And the amazing deal going on right now at the all-new Mini of Escondido. Let me say that again. The amazing deal going on right now at the all-new Mini of Escondido. Stop in today and you'll pay only $199 for 39 months on a brand new Mini. Yep, you heard right. $199 for 39 months.

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32:50This report, it is brought to you by Saquon Casino. Come ride the waves of cash right now at Saquon Casino every Monday through August 16th. You could win $25,000 in cash instantly and some other great prizes like a dream trip to Maui. On the 8 eastbound after the 805, it's taking a walk on the wild side, always this time of morning. A pedestrian walking a little closer to that right lane. You'll want to drive with caution as you approach. Also, the 76 in both directions between the 5. Looks like we've got some slow speeds in the 30s. Let a bad battery unexpectedly leave you stranded in the heat. Get to AutoZone for ruggedly dependable Duralast battery proven tough and only at AutoZone. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. Oh, I want to go to battle. Lauren. I've got strawberry seeds in my teeth. Weird. Woods. I'm a mess today. I am an absolute 100%. There's nothing wrong with Match.com. And Jay. Yeah, I killed a snake. I didn't want to, but he gave me no choice. On FM 94.9. Hey, welcome back. Don't forget, our good friend and comedian Mal Hall is going to be in the studio coming up this morning at 9. We've got more Padres Marlin tickets coming up at 7 o'clock this morning. And Woodsy's going to tell us who's going to be a charger until 2015 within just a matter of moments. Don't go away.

34:52What a day yesterday. So we were going to do a meeting yesterday and ordered lunch, whole deal, got a phone call. My dad has got to be taken to the emergency room. So I left, went and picked my pop-up, took him to the emergency room, and he had some kind of a complication with the surgery that he had. And we were in there for a while. And everything worked out. Good. All is well. All is well. And so Pop is home now. Good. This is the worst call. I saw, like, the look on your face. And then next thing that came out was, uh-oh, what's the matter? And I'm like, oh, my heart just sinks. Mm-hmm. So he's doing good, though. He's fine. He's recovering. It's just scary.

35:49Scary and, you know, you're just seeing your folks getting older. Yeah. It's tough. Seeing your folks getting older in front of you. I had a lot of testing going on yesterday with me. You know, that was a, I think everything in my life is a test. How am I going to react? But that was a test. And I got home. Jake broke something that was important to me in my office. Knew he wasn't supposed to. And then he responded to it like he didn't really care. which isn't really like him. And then I thought to myself this morning, I thought, I think I do that with God a lot. I think I go, I think he goes, you know, you're not supposed to do that. And I go, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh. I do it anyway. I do it anyway. I respond to him like, yeah, I'm not sure I really care about that. Yeah. So I couldn't get too upset with him. This is the worst, though, when something breaks. Oh, gosh.

36:47You feel like it's probably the end of the world. And then a little time passes and you're like, well, that was special and sentimental or whatever it was. But you're like, it's just something. It's just a thing. Just a thing. The thing, by the way, was in actuality, this is a true statement. The thing was actually worth two cents. Wow. Two cents. That's how much it cost. Really? Yeah. It was a... Bazooka gum? It was... Bazooka gum. Like, what cost two cents? Was it a stamp? Uh-uh. No, stamps are expensive. 44 cents. Two cent stamps. Oh, yeah. It was called a mud cake, and it's what they actually eat in Africa and Haiti. Wow. It's mud, and they form them into little cakes. They sell them for two cents because they want to eat. It's mud. It's mud. What did he do? He broke it? He broke it. Crumbled it? Crumbled it? No, it's, I mean, they're hard, man. They're like, it's almost like a ceramic. Wow. And I had it on my desk, and it was special to me because of the meaning behind it, what it is. But oh well, you know, stuff happens. 570-1949 is our number. You can also text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. He's got the sweetest little face. What are you going to do? It's so hard, yeah.

38:14Oh, he's got that sweet little face, that sweet little guy. Woods had a real sweet nap yesterday, didn't he? I slept like a baby. And he had a dream that he was a stand-up comedian. How'd you do? I did pretty good. Nice. I did pretty well. Congrats. Thank you. Do you ever wake up from those dreams and you're like, maybe I should do that? Is this a sign? Of course I did. Is this a sign? I went through bits in my head for the whole rest of the day. What else was the dream? Well, the interesting part of the dream was, so there was this punk that used to mess with me when I was in like eighth grade, ninth grade. Then we became friends and then he started messing with me. And him and his little gang of little dudes he ran around with would never go one on one with me. Yeah. He was there in the comedy club. So I took the mic over. In your dream. In my dream. And I go, oh. Look who's here. And I started to roast the guy in front of the entire audience. And the place was going nuts. And he was all red. And I was like, I woke up, I go, yeah, that felt pretty good. I come out here and rough talk him and run him off. It's the best. I always used to like, I can't sing, but that's the one thing that I wish I could do. And I always used to like.

39:28have these, like, daydreams that, like, when I had crushes on guys in high school, that, like, one day I'd be on an open mic and just, like, pouring my heart out, and they'd walk in, and I'd be like, yeah, you look what you missed. When I, when I went, listen to this. This is humiliating, what I'm about to tell you. I'm ready for it. Humiliating. Different time. Different time. What I'm about to tell you. Different time. I've since matured. About 10 years, no, more than 10 years ago, 12 years ago, I did this thing where I did a hoax like I smoked weed on the air. This is when I worked at the other station. And I did this hoax that I smoked weed on the air and came up with this whole idea of how I could get on the Howard Stern show. Because at the time, Howard was doing mornings, I was doing nights over at the other station. So I dreamed up this idea, right?

40:29And it worked. It went really well. Howard liked it. And I went out to New York and I'm in the studio on the Howard Stern show. So rad. And people are people that knew that it was a hoax were calling and saying it was a hoax. Right. Well, Howard, because of the three hour time difference, they couldn't get anybody on the air on the West Coast from like the police department that. arrested me for smoking weed, which I hate weed. Yeah. They couldn't get anybody on the air from the police department because of the time difference. And so, but it didn't matter. Howard thought it was a good bit and he liked me. And so it was a good bit and whatever. So it ends. I come back to San Diego and I was on this high from being on the Howard Stern show. From smoking weed? No. No. Smoking Big Macs real good. Smoking fake weed. Smoking fake weed. And so as a bit on the air, I called this girl that I used to have a crush on in the eighth grade to be like, hey, look at me. I'm on the Howard Stern show. You called her? Yeah. And what did she say? She was like, hello? Yeah. Mikey who? Cool. She's like, cool. I married a 49er. Don't worry about it.

41:58And I remember, I mean, even to this day, after making said phone call, feel like such a dork. A lot of us dream about it. You did it. I did it. Let me tell you, it ain't worth it. It's not. It's not worth it. I felt like the big, like she, they're not going to give you what you want. What you want is for them to be like, oh my gosh, I should have dated you. That is amazing. You're amazing. You might as well be the president. You're a huge deal now. You are such a big deal. And instead you hear crickets. Yeah. She was like, wow. Cool. Good for you. Oh, what a bad thing. Do you still have that purple jacket? Yeah. Do you still wear that purple jacket? It's not the love of us. Hey, did you ever get to be six feet tall or are you still, you know? Have that growth sprit yet? You drop ALBs? You drop ALBs? Woods, Woods, Woods. Woods, Woods, Woods. Woods on sports supported by my friends at Clearview Eye and Laser. The San Diego Chargers have locked up one of their best players and really one of the best players in the NFL. Antonio Gates is officially going to be a Charger.

43:14For the next five years, he got a $36 million five-year extension. Holy cow. Yeah, 20.4 of that is guaranteed. Guy's a six-time Pro Bowler. He is now the highest-paid tight end in the league. Deserves to be. Congratulations. Deserves to be, buddy. Great job, AJ. Good job. You know, the thing that people were talking about is... This is going to open up discussions for maybe some of the other players that are out there. You know, Sean Merriman has a tender right now that he hasn't signed. The tender is for $3.2 million, and he hasn't signed it and hasn't said when he's going to report. Somebody had tweeted him last night. I was looking at his Twitter, and they're like, I wonder what Vincent Jackson. McNeil and Sean Merriman think about this. And he had retweeted it to his Twitter. So hopefully they get that dude in camp, too, because that'd be nice. Which means, if I understand that correctly, the fact that he retweeted it means that he's like, you're going to give Antonio all that money? Where's my money? Absolutely.

44:13And see, the thing they're saying about Merriman is, you know, he had an injured knee. He needs to play a full season, I think, before they'll lock him down long term. So it's a big year for him. Probably, you know, needs to be in camp with the rest of the guys. You know what this comes down to, by the way? All this comes down to is a simple matter of respect. In his mind. In Merriman's mind, this is not about money and NFL and fame. It's like, I need you to show me that you love me. And the way that you'll show me that you love me and that you respect me as a man is you lock me down right now. And if you expect me to play for one season to prove to you that I'm okay, that's disrespectful to me. Yeah. You agree? I totally agree. I think that's it. 100%. Also, the Padres are off the schneid. They had a huge win at Petco last night, 6-1 over the Dodgers. Jerry Harrison drove in three runs. Clayton Richards was masterful last night.

45:12They scored two runs in the sixth, the seventh, and the eighth. And your boy here last night posted, come on, Padres. Why don't you drive in a run with runners in scoring position less than two outs? No sooner had I said that. Keep doing that. Yeah, seriously, I'm going to do that every night. And then here is Clayton Richards. I'm not looking too far ahead. Cut one. It's too tough to think in those terms. We have to take it one game at a time, and that's why we've been successful is we come to the park every day excited to play that game. And when you start looking ahead of it. different things that put more points on one game than another. I think we get in trouble. All I can hear is the music in the background every time. I'm like, yeah, Indiana. They're always jamming in that locker room. After a win, they are. That's for sure. And the veterans for the Chargers are supposed to report tomorrow. A few notable names obviously will not be there. But Norf still thinks this is his best team in four years. Cut to. Well, I really think, you know, it starts with the veteran players we have. And we do have a lot of continuity. And it does start with the quarterback position. There's a number of other things.

46:17this is the best continuity we've had as a coaching staff. And, you know, I think we improved a great deal as a team last year, and I think we can build on those things. Yeah, you had a boombox. That's like the wrap-it-up music from, like, the Oscars. Yeah. They're like, all right, North. I guess I'm done talking then, huh? Continuity means consistency. Yeah, consistency. Absolutely. And we'll head over really quickly to Broncos camp. They are missing a couple of their big draft picks. Your boy, Tim Tebow, has yet to sign. Dez Bryant has pretty much messed it up for him. Dez was the pick ahead of him. Dez went ahead and signed. Tebow's after him. Tebow wants more money than Dez Bryant. That's not good. No. So he hasn't signed. Yeah. Along with receiver Demarius Thomas. Here is coach Josh Daniels. Cut three. We'll hope to have both of them as soon as possible.

47:10You know, I don't have any timetables or anything like that. But, you know, we'll look forward to seeing them as soon as that process plays out. Yep. Well, listen, they'll get him. And the deal is, too, is it because he is a quarterback, quarterbacks make more money. Did I say Josh Daniels? Yeah. Josh McDaniels. Josh McDaniel. McDaniel, yeah. I'm an idiot. You know, the fact that he's a quarterback, though, quarterbacks make more dough, man. They also get all the girls. That's true. Is Tebow going to be a quarterback in the NFL? Really? Oh, my goodness. Is he? Can he be a quarterback in the NFL and throw from your hip? Well, maybe. I don't know. Maybe they coach him up. I don't know. Maybe. What do I care? He's a Bronco. I mean, I like Tim Tebow, but he's a Bronco. Yeah, he has not signed yet either. And then there was a really sad story yesterday. Former 13-year NBA veteran Lorenzen Wright, he had gone missing. His family reported it. Well, they found his body in the woods in Memphis. It was really, really sad. He played for about, I think, six NBA teams, but he also played the University of Memphis and for the Memphis Grizzlies in his career. What do they think that was about? Foul play. Really? Yeah, unfortunately, man. Very, very sad. So that is Woods on sports. Okay, so the panel is something we do where we give you, this is where you find out a lot of the big things that are happening in the world and we discuss, but there's a time limit. It's kind of like around the horn.

48:33few seconds to talk about each topic. And these are some of the big things that are going on in the world right now. One of them is... Motorboating? Apple. People suing Apple over overheating iPads. I roll. Yes, a class action lawsuit has been filed by users, and these users are mad because they're claiming their iPad shut off after overheating. Now, there's three iPad users making this claim right now because I guess... Three? Three? Three? Yeah. Three? Wow. Because I guess the iPad shut off after it was in direct sunlight for long enough. And they're saying it fails to meet the promises Apple made about using the device as an e-book reader. Hey, guys. Maybe don't read your iPad in Bolivia out on the beach for five hours where it's 125 degrees shining down on your iPad. And then it overheats.

49:43They're mad. Oh, this. Sorry. Sorry. I won't comment until I get to comment. I won't comment until I get to comment. Are we ready? Yeah. Woods. Yeah. Go ahead. What do you. OK. I think really, Mikey, the quality of things is really starting to suffer in this country. You know, you notice all the recalls for cars. I think everybody is just want to put out a product for the consumer to just eat and eat and eat and eat. And they're not really worried about quality anymore, pal. Oh, he's doing it on purpose. He's doing it on purpose. He's doing it on purpose. Ella B? Yeah. I think it's a little bit of a... Hey there. It's a little bit of a witch hunt against Apple right now because three people does not seem to deem a class action suit in my mind. Yeah. And I love my Mac and it's kind of a bit that I make fun of the Apple products because I know you love them so much, Mike. Look at Woodsy looking at me right now. Chewing on that.

50:44Piece of plastic just looking at me with that big grin on his face going, what do you think, pal? What do you got? This is the worst to me. I can't believe that because a product is so great, and that's what it is, the product is great. I just ordered a new iMac. Apple's got great stuff. I'm sorry, Windows, that your stuff is junk. Wow. Apple's great. And it's overblown. That's like me saying my iPad broke. I was like, Lauren Woods, will you guys jump on board with me? Because look at this. It overheated. I thought in order to be a class action, I thought there was like a minimum number of complaints. So did I. I guess not. But I mean, to me, that is just so ridiculous. I have the iPad. It works great. I use it all the time. My son uses it all the time. And the thing is great. Who was he looking at pictures of the other day? Mariah Carey. He's three. Three years old. And he didn't want me to take it away from him. You had to pry it out of his white knuckled hands. Yeah. I thought, wow. Guess I know the way you roll. Yeah. You're a proud papa. Don't lie. Absolutely. He likes black girls. I can't listen. I can't do anything about who he likes. I'm not going to tell him. Listen, you like Mariah Carey? You like Mariah Carey? Talk about motorboating. Yeah. That's right. Guy likes black girls and he likes Mariah Carey. Real good. Good for him. Mm-hmm.

52:10He's no dummy. He's no dummy. His mama didn't bring him up to be no dummy. He dug a rap. Better than looking at Jude Law or something. What if he had Jude Law in his hands? Shirtless. And he's shirtless and he wouldn't let me take the iPad away. You're like, buddy. Hey, gotta have that iPad. Give me that back. I'm not kidding. Give it to me. Never again are you touching this. Yeah. Well, listen. Kid's a healthy kid. Okay, the next one. Scientists say that an asteroid... Could hit Earth in 2182. Yeah, that's what scientists are saying. A large asteroid in space would be most likely to hit Earth in 2182. If it crashed into our planet at all, it's a one in 1000 chance of actually hitting Earth. But they're saying the asteroid, which is called 1999 RQ36. Of course it is. Greetings. Greetings. But if it were to hit, that would be the year. 2182. Yeah.

53:09Woods. I will have been dead for about 30 years at that point. You're chill 30 years. More than that. Yeah, probably more than that. Living to be 150. Care less. L.O.B. Well, if that were the case, then I would be worried about my kids' kids and everything like that. But it seems like one in a thousand chance. It's kind of like the movie Armageddon, except not. Yeah. And you're just going to have a big uproar. If the odds were a little greater, then... Maybe start telling people. I bet you Apple would find something to dismantle the asteroid anyway. The asteroid. Yeah, the asteroid. I think it's a bit, and I don't believe that scientists can predict that. And I think it's ridiculous. And I think that they said that, and in 2182, nothing's going to happen. You know why? Because I don't believe scientists can figure that out. Everybody thinks scientists are the smartest people in the world. Guess what? Nothing's going to happen in 2182. What if it does? Well, then at that point, I will come on the radio and I will say I was wrong about the scientist predicting the asteroid it hit yesterday and I was wrong about it. So what's happening in spaceflight? Spaceflight. Next up, Sylvester Stallone was at Comic-Con. All right.

54:39He was talking about his new movie. He's got a new movie out called The Expendables. But anyway, they were asking about Mel Gibson. Okay. And one of the things that he said that I think was a little controversial was this. I believe everything leads up to something. Man just doesn't wake up in the morning and interrupt. So his point, obviously, is that I guess you could kind of take it like, well, maybe. It takes two to tango? Is that what you would take it maybe to me? Something like that. Yeah, it's not like he just went nuts in one second. Right. And here's more of what he said about Mel. I like Mel. He's always been nice to me. If there's another side to him, I don't know it. I just hope that the court of, let's say, fairness just hears it out. Is he upset? Yeah. But like I said, you don't know anything about anybody until you take a walk in his shoes. That's all. Well.

55:42I remember when this first came out on day two or three. I don't remember which. On day two or three, it was like the Mel Gibson tapes part two or part three. I can't remember. And I remember saying, well, I mean, how long do we play the tapes? Because I said, what if there's, I mean, do we do it part four, part five? Do we do it part six? Yeah, it's gone that far. And by the way, when I said that. I remember it was very facetious because, of course, there wouldn't be a part six. I was just being facetious. You know, like I was trying to be ridiculous. I believe and I may be wrong, but I believe we're on part nine. And I'm not kidding. It's either eight or nine. But yeah, more was released yesterday. Yeah, there's more now. And it's like part nine or whatever. Yeah. Woodsy. Yes. What do you think about the Mel Gibson tapes? Is this, should he be brought up on criminal charges? Is enough enough? Well, I think, you know, if you prove that he did assault her or, you know, physically abuse her, then yeah, he probably, no, he not probably should, he should. But until then, you know, kind of let the guy do his thing, let her do her thing and see how it shakes out. I don't need to hear it every single day. You know, it's just getting old to me at this point. The guy, he lost his mind. Yeah. I mean, he had a temporary lapse of judgment. L.O.B.

57:13I think it depends on what the intent of her releasing these tapes or whoever released these tapes. If it's so that she can finally get someone to listen to her and have a criminal investigation because she's claiming she was abused, then I think that that's a pretty good cause to say, okay, if he's capable of this, then maybe we should look into it further. But, I mean, I think the only other thing you can do is maybe just prove she gets a restraining order. I don't know. I really don't know what the intent of the tapes is. Yeah. My guess is that she did release the tapes in one big chunk and it's the particular website that's releasing them that their deal is we're going to release them in small portions because it'll keep our name in the news as long as we keep releasing them in small portions. But regardless, it's all gross. It's all gross to me. I think the American public gets to this point where we're like, we're kind of bored of it. Like we get to a point where we're like, eh, okay, we get it. We get it. He's mean. Yeah, he's mean. We fully understand the point. Hey, guys, you work in a job where you're working a lot and maybe your wife, maybe your girlfriend, she's like thinking that you may be working a little too much and she wants a little her time.

58:58Are you in that position? I think I may be in that position. I think Woods may be in that position. I think maybe every guy listening right now may be in that position. I'm not sure. But what I do know is that we got a hot email from M1 Christy. And I want to see what you think about it. Also, when we come back, I'm going to play a blatantly sexist remark that I agree with. Wholeheartedly. Maybe a punch in the face. Are you interested to know what it is, though? I am. I absolutely am. Well, we will play it for you next. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text 949mikey at gmail.com.

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1:06:32KBZZ San Diego, Lincoln Financial Radio Station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. If I like rock music, if you bring up Hinder, the Hinder card, I can't go any further. And Lauren. I have a very keen sense of smell. Woods. I mean, hey, listen, I'd do snuff on the planet, okay? Sienna. I can hit some mean wiffle balls in our yard. And Jay. I don't watch sports. I have nothing to do. If I'm not playing, I don't want to see it. On FM 94.9. A blatantly sexist comment that I actually agree with? Yeah. Let me introduce the show to you. My name is Mikey. That's my boy, Woods. That's my girl, Lauren. That's my girl, Sienna. And that's Jay in the room next to us. He's our producer. And our phone number is 570-194-9. Mal Hall, comedian, friend of the show. He is going to be in the studio at 9 o'clock. Funny guy, man. He's coming in here. And we're going to be... Go ahead and call us now, as a matter of fact. You want to play the Ding Dong sing-along?

1:07:57We will play the Ding Dong Singalong for you with Padres Marlin tickets as the prize. Coming to town this weekend? That's right. Now, pair-wise, we may only have one pair. Yeah. So the first person to win the Ding Dong Singalong today will get Padres Marlins tickets. And the way that the Ding Dong Singalong works is you can be a guy or a girl. I'm going to play you a clip of a song. Could be any song, any genre, any kind of song. When the song stops playing, you must take over singing the song. Okay? It's called the ding-dong sing-along. And you have to be a ding-dong. And you have to be a ding-dong in order to do it. It's a caveat. A blatantly sexist comment that I agree with. Thank you. This has to do with the Wall Street meltdown. Basically what caused our country all of the problems economically that we're in. Take a listen. The government accounting office found that over the last 15 years, Wall Street has a real bad track record of getting beyond white men. Yes, and you know what? 20 new agencies. Just what we needed, right? If I may, Jim? Yes, if you may. Don't you think that the Wall Street meltdown just simply would not have happened had there been more women around? I believe that. I believe that. I really do. I mean, all this... I do, too. It's sexist against men. Because we're better with money? Keep listening. Keep listening.

1:09:26Kind of phallic obsession. Yeah, exactly. I mean, I just think women tend to look at it from a different point of view. I think that guys may have this built in sort of like ego, greed sort of thing that we kind of have built into us. Like she put it, this sort of phallic mentality. That's weird to compare that to money. It's abstract. Yeah. But I. But strangely enough, my brain processes that. It's abstract, but for whatever reason, I get it. It's like, who wants to have the bigger... Bank account. The bigger bank account. Yeah, and a man is more likely to take some ridiculously stupid risk. Yeah. You know what I mean? Where I do believe that, and it's a generalization. I mean, she made a sexist comment, but it's a generalization that maybe women are a little bit more practical when it comes to,

1:10:28hmm, maybe we don't do this. Whereas the male may be wired and predisposed a bit more to, I got to have the bigger yacht, I got to have the bigger, I got to have more square footage than that dude. Yep. Bigger dinghy. Yeah, I got to have a bigger dinghy. I don't know if I agree with that. I think there's plenty of girls that, I need that designer bag, you know? Could be, but. I can get behind that statement. In that particular context. I think I think that might be the case. I got this email I'm going to read to you. We'll see what you think about this. Man, it's tough. I was reading this email and I'm like, how do I read this email on the air and be accountable to myself? And like, how do I look in the mirror when I read the email? How do I not come across, you know, because whatever I say, I got to back up myself with my own life. Oh, yeah. Got me.

1:11:33I mean, from my own personal standpoint. So I'm going to read that to you here in just a minute. But first, we're going to do something called the Ding Dong Singalong. Don't know if you've ever heard the Ding Dong Singalong, but this thing is real easy. All we're going to do is we're going to play a clip for you of a song. And when it stops, you take over. You may be a man or a woman. It does not matter. What's he actually playing trumpet on this track right now? Live. Yes. I'm walking the yellow brick road. That's right. 5701949. You be a guy or a girl. And we're going to play this song for you. And when it stops, you take over singing. Now, there is a couple of rules to it. You can't just go, I can't hear it. Because you can hear it. Make sure of it.

1:12:38Made sure you could hear it. You can't just lie on the radio. You can't just lie and be like, I can't hear it. You can hear it. You got to be creative, man. You got to sing along something. You know, you got to make up your own lyrics. You got to do something on there. The bit we don't want is, I don't know the words to this song. Right. It's ridiculous. We don't want that. We want to be creative. Do something for us. We got M1 Cody on the line. Are you there, Cody? Yeah. You ready to play the Ding Dong sing-along? Yep. All right. When this song stops, you start. Here we go. I just want you to know. Is it a guilty pleasure or is it just a pleasure? It's like one of my top guilty pleasures. Why is it guilty? The band is called Hoobastank. That's enough said. I was walking into the STP concert with my wife, her friend Erica, Erica's husband Todd, at the time the song was on the radio. And he's like, is there a gayer, stupider song?

1:14:06Then that song, The Reason by Hoobastank. And I'm like, in my head, I'm like, oh, my gosh, I love that song. I love that song. I love that song. And I'm like, I know, man, huh? It's so weak. It's so weak. I put it on my ex-boyfriend's, like, love CD. And every other track, he was like, wow, wow, babe, this is great. And then that came on. He lowered his car radio and he went, really? And as soon as you were out of the car, he cranked it. And he was like, I just want you to know. Such a good song. Guarantee it. Guarantee he loved it. I don't know. He just wanted to seem cool. I don't know. A hundred percent. I'm telling you from one of those guys. Yeah. That's absolutely what happened. He wanted to seem cool. I was like, I don't really like it either. I was in a weird mood. I was in a weird mood. Cody, you are a winner. Hang on the line, okay?

1:15:00Nice. Hang in line, though. Yeah, Cody. And, oh, by the way, Cody, you are the lucky guy that won the Padres Marlin tickets. Last ones we had, dude. Last ones we had. So congrats. Yeah. Hang in line, okay? All right. M1Antoine. Is it Antoine? Did I get that right? Yeah. Antoine, you ready to do this? Yep. All right, dude. I'm going to play you a song. When it stops, you start. Here we go. And your turn. I think his phone. actually cut out. No way. I think his phone actually cut out. Oh, man. So you know what I'll do? M1 Squeaky Fart's on the line. Hi. Squeaky Fart. Hi, Squeaky Fart. I'm going to give you the same one, bro, okay? Really? Come on. You can do it, dude. Hit me. I say absolutely yes. He has 100%.

1:16:43Did I hear a leader of the pack in there? Yeah, you did. If you could only see what the three of these clowns are doing in here. Even Mikey busting cheerleader moves. I may be doing that in my car. We all had pom-poms. We all had air pom-poms. I'm humiliated. I'm humiliated. I wouldn't have been humiliated, but Sienna let everybody know that we were using air pom-poms. Well, Mikey, you were like, they were kind of joking, but you were serious. I was very serious. You were getting after it. I take my cheering. Are you a yell eater? I take my cheering real seriously. It's a sport. It's a sport. Handle on squeaky fart, all right? A little squeaker. M1 Kim, are you there? Yes, I am. Are you ready to do this? Yeah, I think I am. You're going to get... See, you're not going to have any problem with this. You're a girl. You're going to be fine. I'm telling you right now. You're going to be fine. You take over when the song starts. Here we go. I feel like a woman. Yeah, you do. I've never heard that in my life. What? Never heard it in my life. You're not a human being. I'm my mother. I've never heard it. Really? I was looking at Mikey like...

1:18:10He was. You've never heard, oh my gosh, I love that song. You've never heard, man. Shania? No. I mean, I think I probably heard it even on like commercials and stuff. I think you've probably sang along with it in the shower. I think I live my life by it. You're like a woman. That's kind of your motto. I think it may be my personal motto. I think it may be written on my urn. It's tattooed on your wrist. Don't lie. With a picture of the album cover. I'm embarrassed. Hang on, Kim. Hang on. Not only did I know it, I was like, yeah. You were doing the Z-snap. Yeah, I was. I didn't want it to end. Yeah. Let's see. M1 Cody. Are you there? Yeah. Wait, you already played, didn't you? He won. Sorry about that. I'm like, Cody. Sorry. Sorry about that. I read. I'm Ron Burgundy. I read what it says. How about M1 Squeaky Farts? Where are you at? It sounded like Cody was in the bathroom. I know. It did. M1 Kathy from San Diego.

1:19:19How are you? I'm good. How are you? I'm good. You ready to play? I am ready to play. It's a ding-a-dong sing-along. When the song stops, you start. Here we go. With she back in the day. Holy cow. With that sweatband on her. Good Lord. So inappropriate. I was watching it this morning. Oh, my God. She's like grabbing onto the equipment around the guy. I'm like, wow. Hello. You know, LOB taught me how to figure out the difference between odd and even. Hang on the line, by the way, Kathy. You're a winner. Good job. She taught me how to figure out odd and even. Yes. She did it by saying if you have a baseball team, you split them in half and there's one extra player on one side of the baseball team. He's the oddball. Oddball. 64. Fixed it for me. That's even. Yep. Holy cow. Even.

1:20:30Fix it for me forever. Unbelievable. This is a true statement that he's making. Absolutely. I mean, I'm 40 and I figured it out at 40 years old because L.O.B. taught me that. And I'm telling you, people tried to teach me mathematically. It never worked. Okay? Because that's the way my brain works. I know the difference between vertical and horizontal because of that song. No way. Really? Yeah. She says there's nothing left to talk about unless it's... horizontally. Oh, nice. I know, which is creepy and dirty. And when I was a kid, I got that. I was like... And now, every time I hear vertical, I'm like, well, people can't do it like that. I guess they can. That's how I figured it out. I had a hard time with that, but I thought about the horizon going across. You did? That's what I did. But then the band Vertical Horizon came out, and I was like, oh, my gosh. Now what? What am I going to do? Now what do I do? 5701-949 is our number, and you can also text us 949mikey at gmail.com. Ooh, this looks good. This looks interesting. M1, is it Lee or Leia from Del Mar? It's Leah. Leah. M1, Leah from Del Mar. You were calling to tell us about what?

1:21:50Well, my husband bought his daughter from a previous marriage, my stepdaughter, a brand new car. Right. Without telling me, he wrote a check out of our joint checking account for a brand new car, and she's in high school, and I'm furious about it. I'm driving an eight-year-old car. Right. Okay. We didn't even discuss it. And it's a joint account. Yes. But it's his daughter from a previous. Yes. Didn't discuss it. No. Yeah, you have a right to be mad, in my opinion. I think so, too. Woods? Woods? Wait, did... I don't know if this really matters, but did he buy you the car you're driving right now? Um, no. You said it's an eight-year-old? I've been married with my car. Okay. I'm trying to think why she should be mad. Why she should be mad? Well, because for the same... Forget the fact that it's his daughter from a previous marriage. You're not discussing with your spouse what you're spending your money on? You can't really forget that because he's kind of at liberty to buy his daughter whatever he wants. It's his money, too. Yeah, but from a joint checking account, if there's two people in there, two people got to agree on where that money goes. They don't? Do they? It's his daughter. You can buy whatever he wants. They should if they're married or in business together. They should, but they don't always have to.

1:23:14Is it wrong of me to want to ask, do you work too? I do. Okay. So that's how many, too? I'd be mad, yeah. There's money, too. Here's the deal. I'm going to investigate a little bit with you. Okay. I will give you that it is definitely a foul to use money from a joint checking account and not discuss it with your spouse. Okay, I give that to you. But I want to dig a little deeper with you. All right. Is there a part of it that bothers you? because this is a daughter from a previous marriage. That's a yes. That's a yes, by the way. A hesitation. That's a yes. She's very nice to me, and we aren't very close, and I've tried really hard to have a relationship with her. I don't mind in buying her a car. I think people's first cars ought to just be a used car. Maybe a used car.

1:24:12See, because I'm thinking to myself, okay, if they were married and this was a daughter that they had together and the daughter was a teenager and her husband bought the daughter a car and didn't say anything to her about it and just used money out of their joint checking account, yeah, she'd probably be upset about it and be like, hey, you're buying cars without telling me? Obviously. But I don't think that she would be this upset if it were their daughter. I think that what's really playing into it is this is some daughter that you had. with another woman. Maybe the other woman throw down the other half. Well, she's saying that she's not nice to her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But also, even if it were like, I know with my parents, my mom would be like, hey, we need to discuss. I don't think she needed a new car. I think she needed a used car. I think there's a couple layers to what she's upset about, understandably. What? Dude, you earn the money too? You want to spend your money on your daughter? Have a ball. But, okay. Do you give that it should have been discussed? Sure. But, I mean, here's the discussion. Hey, FYI, I'm going to go buy a car for my daughter. Yeah, but not with her money as well. That's my money too because I put money in there. It's a joint checking account. It just depends on what they decided they were going to use that joint money for. I've decided that I'm going to use it for my daughter. That's no. So if I understand you correctly, you're only telling her out of just kind of a...

1:25:38She's going to let her know. Heads up. FYI, I'm going to add a wing onto the house, but it's my money too. Absolutely. Absolutely. Do your thing. What? No way. That's their house. That's his daughter, and this woman doesn't like her daughter. That's the problem, is the woman doesn't like her. Okay, but separate of that. I think you might be right. You can't be separate of that. That's part of the main issue. And he's like, hey, when I go to my wife and tell her, hey, I'm going to buy a car for Caitlin or whatever her name is, and she's going to be like, hell no, you're not. And he's like, and that's going to get them in a huge, huge brawl. Maybe not if there's a discussion. Yeah, maybe he doesn't say, I'm going to do this. And why does it have to be a new car? Like, how many 16-year-olds get a new car? I got one. I didn't. I got a used car. I got a brand new Mustang. 17. Woodsy. You hanging out with my mom or what? Yeah. Mom, where's my used car? New car. That's just the way it was. And yeah, my dad could have bought me a jalopy. He didn't. 570-1949. I got to know what people think about that. 570-1949. Thank you, Leah. Thank you for the call. I understand.

1:26:51where dude is coming from. It's his daughter. He's like, hey, I'm going to get her a car. In my opinion, you got to go to your wife and say, hey, here's what I'm thinking about. Hey, honey, I'm at Albertson's. I wanted to buy a steak. Do I need your permission? How much is a steak? $14,000? $15. $15 or $15,000? $15. Oh, then you're fine. A new car is more than $15,000. What's the cutoff to when I can use my money? I got an answer. How much? $3,000. BS. But it's our money. I don't know. A couple grand. $2,000. $1,000. grand. If the word grand isn't... I don't know, man. He's got a good point. If there's a comma in the number, a discussion is involved. But it's her money, too. She said her money goes into it. And it's his money, too. Oh, my gosh. It's not bad. There's a comma in there. Let's maybe talk about it. Really? Question mark? Holy cow. Voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. I'm ready. Call 570-1949. Keep going all day. Or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com.

1:28:03I guess I was a little confused about that part. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. You don't want to miss your chance to hit the surf and have sand stuck in your butt all day. That's how we say hello. At the FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. The party at the beach is coming August 29th at the Oceanside Pier Amphitheater. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Miller Lite and Sion. Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros. Rogue Wig. The Wigs. And the Delta Spirit. A cast-by local 94.9 stage. The silent comedy. The nervous records. The burning of Rome. And white apple tree. Get your tickets for 30 bucks today. No service fees or extra charges. Get them online at fm949sd.com or independencejam.com. Eight vans at the beach. Get tickets and join the party. August 29th in Oceanside. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Wahoo's Fish Tacos. This could possibly be the best new car offer of the year. Bob Baker Subaru, just west of Parkway Plaza, El Cajon, is offering new 2010 Bob Baker Subaru Impreza 2.5i's for just $99 a month. That's a new 010 Bob Baker Subaru Impreza Model AJB, only $99 plus tax a month. And your new Bob Baker Subaru Impreza comes well-equipped with automatic power windows and locks, CD player, and much more. Unit 510-656.

1:29:2136-month closed-end lease with $2,999 due at lease signing. Zero security deposit on approved credit, 10,000 miles per year with 15 cents per mile in excess. And remember, Bob Baker Subaru El Cajon has a great selection of new all-wheel drive vehicles to choose from. It's Bob Baker Subaru just west of Parkway Plaza El Cajon or anytime at bakersubaru.com. Where it's so nice to be nice. Listen up, San Diego. Prospect Bar and Grill brings you Prospect Live. San Diego's Thursday night spot for live music. Thursday, July 29th. Prospect Live features the Earthlings along with Habitat's pre-CD release party. Turn out the lights. Electric House and DJ Chuck Prada in the mix. $3 Dos Equis and $5 Yucalates all night. The Earthlings and Habitat this Thursday night at Prospect Bar and Grill. Located at 1025 Prospect Street. Upstairs next to Sushi on the Rock. For more info, go to prospectbar.com. This is a Park Flight Promotions event. Stop by the Home Depot today and you'll find that every appliance of $398 or more is 10% off. And with free haul away and delivery, things can really get cooking. Or chilling.

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1:31:42Call 1-800-PEP-BOYS or visit pepboys.com. Signs that say this is not an exit don't apply to him. His two cents have overruled Supreme Court decisions. If he rode in your car, its resale value would instantly increase. He likes the word fog. Were you to pass him on the street and he didn't see you? you would still feel like he said hello and asked you about your day. If you were stuck in an elevator with him, you wouldn't want to be saved. Even his tree houses have finished basements. His business card just says, interesting man in the world. Don't always drink beer. When I do, I prefer Dos Equis. Enjoy Dos Equis responsibly. Imported by Cervezas Mexicanas, White Plains, New York. Stay thirsty, my friends.

1:32:51From the director of Meet the Parents. I host a dinner once a month. It's a contest for the biggest idiot. What, Barry? It's going to be a party. Tomorrow. I sit from the other side. She's talking to the lobster. Who? I have laid eggs inside of your brain. Get them out of my head. Steve Carell. Paul Rudd. What? I can't sleep. I'm too excited about dinner. Dinner for Schmucks. Rated PG-13. May be inappropriate for children under 13. Starts tomorrow. Here we are. I still can't believe you found a last-minute trip to Paris. This is incredible. Oh, we can see all the museums, and I can't wait to go shopping. We can't really afford that. Which part? Actually, we can't afford to leave the hotel room. Don't open the minibar. It pays to check CheapFlights.com. With over 4 million flight deals arriving daily, you can go where you never thought you could and have money left over to actually enjoy it. Check first and never miss the chance to get a better deal. Hey, it's called CheapFlights.com for a reason. So, what are you guys up to this summer?

1:33:53Have you ever noticed that nobody says, have a good winter, or asks how your spring went? It's because summer is the most fleeting of all the seasons. We need to enjoy it. So don't wait to visit the Lexus Golden Opportunity Sales Event. Because when summer's over, it'll be too late to enjoy legendary Lexus quality at equally legendary prices. From the driver-inspired RX to the advanced hybrid technology of VHS, there's a model perfect for everyone. The Lexus Golden Opportunity Sales Event. It's here, but not forever. Only through September 7th. At your Lexus dealer in Carlsbad, El Cajon, Escondido, or San Diego. Hey, how was your summer? Lease the 2010 IS-250 for $339 a month for 36 months with $3499 due at signing. Call 1-800-USA-LEXUS for important lease program limitations and offer details. Not all customers will qualify. Excludes official fees, taxes, title, license, registration, and dealer charges offer. And September 7th, 2010, offer valid Lexus Western areas only. This report is brought to you by Allstate. Want to save money without cutting insurance coverage? Get Allstate today, dollar for dollar. Nobody protects you like Allstate. On the 805 northbound before the 5, we've got a disabled car. It is blocking that left lane. And the 54 westbound Woodman Avenue, an accident has been reported here. It's a solo car that swerved off the roadway and then landed on the right shoulder embankment. CHP is still on the scene, and they're still waiting for a tow truck to arrive.

1:35:18Looks like the 163 southbound after the five and other accident, two cars, both these guys over on that right shoulder. This report is also brought to you by Walgreens. Walgreens brand over-the-counter medications are 100% quality guaranteed. So you can trust every package with the Walgreens name. Walgreens, there's a way to stay well. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. What's happening? This is Bird from Dragon Eyewear with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for this Thursday morning, being brought to you by Guayaquil Yerba Mate. Once again, on the small side this morning, looking at a bit of a southwesterny swell trickling in, a little bit bigger than yesterday, but not by a whole lot. Averaging about ankle knee high, waist high sets, top spots, maybe a chest high plus or every once in a while, but that's going to be primarily in the far north county at those top south-facing areas. and occasional select spots right down here in San Diego proper. Overcast skies will greet you a little bit of a northwest wind, so there is a texture bump on it. And to go along with that, there was a very low tide this morning, so that is further hurting size and shape. You can expect a little bit of an improvement throughout the day as that tide does fill back in. And by the way things were looking this morning, it could be a possible earlier clear-off, so we might see some actual sunshine out here for the first time in a while at least.

1:36:39So for up-to-the-minute surf reports, forecasts, go to surfline.com. And for everything you need in order to go surf, check out one of South Coast Surf Shops, five locations, or go online at southcoast.com. This surf report is brought to you by Guayaquil Yerba Mate, and it can only be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't want to cry. I don't want movies that make me cry. Lauren. I'm so scared of authority, so I start crying. Woods. I haven't moisturized in days. Dying. Sienna. I'm a big girl now. Got married, having a baby. Now I can rent a car. Yeah, like long, soft kisses. Whatever. On FM 94.9. I'll haul in the studio later. Move his voice, man. What's going on in news, Sienna? How do you think San Diego scored on water quality? Good or bad in Southern California? Terrible, terrible, terrible. One of the best. Drinking water? Are you kidding me? No, ocean water. That's shocking. Ocean water, yeah. L.A. County was one of the worst. 16% bacteria. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What? What a little Mexican doo-doo that they pour in there. I don't know. I'm just reading the news. Jay and Lauren pick it out. Oh, that's right. I know. They go through. Santa Barbara, Orange County, they did a little...

1:38:21better than L.A., but we scored 6% bacteria. San Luis Obispo did better than us, but overall in Cardiff State Beach, one of the best beaches ever to go in the water. It was voted the nation's 200 most popular beaches, and it's because they have a five-star rating in the water. Wow. I'm shocked. Also, Toyota has recalled 400,000 cars. Over steering issues. 400,000 cars. Now, we all know Toyota's had some issues over the last few months. I think it's a bit. They've recalled over 8 million vehicles worldwide. You know what? What? I found out they're recalling all kinds of cars. We don't hear about it. You know why we don't hear about it? It's business as usual. The reason that we hear about it with Toyota is because it's cool headlines. Yeah. Because they're the darling. They're like the media darling right now. It's like, they are. Dude, I'll show you stats. I'll show you the stats. I looked at them. A friend of mine sent me. They go, what do you think about this? And I go, I'm not going to spend a lot of time about it on the radio. Yeah. But that's true. Everyone buys Toyota still. It's one of the most popular cars. But just so you know, the car that they're recalling now is the Toyota Avalon, my sister's name. It's the ones that were manufactured between 2000 and 2004. Let's see what's going on in sports. The Chargers have locked up Antonio Gates for the next five years.

1:39:41A five-year extension at $36 million. He will be the highest paid tight end in the league, and he is well-deserving. The Padres take on the Dodgers today. Day game, 335. Matt Latos against Vincente Padilla in the rubber game. Go get him. So we got a call from a lady that said she is married to a dude that was in a previous marriage, has a teenage daughter, and he just bought her a car. And she was upset about it. She said that he didn't talk to her about it. Which anybody can understand that. But what we were kind of getting to the bottom of was, is it really about that? Or is it more about the fact that this girl, you don't really get along with that great? It's just you want to be in the loop. Yeah. You know, like steal your money, joint bank account. Yeah. M1 Mechanic is on the line. You there, Mechanic? Yeah. If you can go buy a car for one of your daughters, whether it be daughter, stepdaughter, whatever, if it's a joint account, you should definitely talk about it unless the guy's been putting money away on the side and says, hey, you know.

1:40:44I've been putting a little extra money aside. This is what I want to do. You know, it's my money. You know, how's that sound? But just going out and buying, you know, the cheapest car, what, $8,000, $9,000? I'm sure I didn't get her the cheapest car. That's a lot of money out of a checking account. For sure. The problem with that, though, and the thing that I, you know, that I'm really harping on is the fact that, you know, she doesn't like this girl. And had he gone to her and said, hey, listen, I've been putting some money away that I can do whatever I want with. Once you're married, isn't that both of your money? No matter how you get it, it's not? If you decide you're going to have separate accounts where you put it away to do with it what you will. Yeah, then it is. Yeah, then it's yours to do with what you will. If it's in a joint account, really. Not if it's in a joint account. I mean, what's the opposite? You're saying that... No, I mean, because she's saying, hey, it's all of our money. It's our money. So that means part of it is his. In a joint account. Let's say in a joint account. In a joint account, isn't part of that money his? No. Oh, it's not? That's why it's ours. A lot of people will have... So part of it's not his. Individual accounts and then joint accounts. He contributes to it, but so does she. Imagine if she came home with a brand new car. Right. He would be P.O.'d. Let me ask you this way. Let me ask you this way. You work, your wife does not. Right. Is part of it yours? Yeah. Okay. Is more a part of it yours? No. I mean, it's kind of, it's kind of, you use what you need when you need it.

1:42:07Yeah. We don't argue about money in my house. We purposely don't have a joint account. Really? Yeah, we have no joint account. I write checks. I pay the bills. She uses it. She buys groceries. She gets her hair and nails it. Here's what I don't want in my home. Me flipping open Bank of America when we're on a break looking and going, did she really just spend $300 at the hair salon? And she doesn't want to go, did he really just buy a new bat for $150? We don't do that in my house, so that's, for me, I'm like, eh, if a guy wants to buy his daughter a car, have a ball. If you don't want to answer this question, you don't have to because I'm an appropriate money guy asking a question about money. But if she has a separate account than you, how does money get into her account if she doesn't have a job? If she asks me for money, I give her money. I transfer it right here. Got it. Now, okay. And vice versa, because I'll tell you, we sold our house in Texas. She has the money. I don't have the money. I don't even have access to the money. If I wanted to go out today and spend $5,000 of that money from, let's go finger quotes on this, our house because we're married, our house in Texas that really I have nothing to do with. It was her mother's home. But it's our money because we're married. If Jamie, if I was like, I want to go spend five grand today, I couldn't.

1:43:21I'd have to ask her. Well, I think no one's going to fault you for the way that you guys decide to do your finances. But in this situation and when people have joint accounts, I think the purpose of it is, OK, we might even have our separate accounts. But what goes into this one is what we use as a unit. And you would assume it's discussed. So it would have been OK if he had said, you know what, I'm going to cash in a little bit of my retirement to buy my daughter a car or I'm going to cash in, you know, this. This savings account that I have to buy my daughter card. That would have been okay? He wouldn't have had to run that buyer? No, that's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is that under no circumstance will ever think that it's okay for somebody to say to their spouse, here's what I'm doing. I never think that that's okay. In fact, fast forward that tape of saying to your spouse, here's what I'm doing. You're instantly setting yourself up for pushback no matter what. Just out of a matter of respect, if if if Lauren and I are married and I came from a marriage and previous marriage and I say to Lauren, here's what I'm doing. Lauren's going to be like, oh, really? I think anybody is going to be like, oh, really? But if I come to them and I say, OK, so here's the situation, you know, Susie, who you I know, you don't like Susie.

1:44:44My daughter. My daughter. We don't know that she doesn't like her. She said that they have a hard time building that relationship. She hadn't been nice to her. Translation, they don't like each other. Maybe it's one-sided and it hurts her. Okay, maybe it is. Maybe it is. Okay, so let's say that that's a situation. The deal is that you go, hey, listen, I know that you guys have a strained relationship, but Susie needs a car, and I'd like to talk about getting Susie a car. If Woodsy's right, this lady's going to go, well, I don't think that Susie needs a new car. And I don't think this is. Hey, and if that's what she's saying, why not hear her out on that? Hear her out. But it's still your daughter that you're going to provide and do whatever you need to do for now. Whatever you need to do that. I can't find whatever you perceive you need to do.

1:45:36Whatever you perceive is what you need to do. A car is not like clothing, though. You don't have to give your child a car. Hey, in a lot of cases, you do. Your child has to have a car in a lot of cases. Maybe, but I don't think that the perception that what your daughter needs is a new car is fair under anybody's examination. So it's the fact that it's new. Listen to this text we got, man. M1 Katie texted in and said, Mikey. I think the underlying issue here is jealousy. The stepmom is cruising grand in an eight-year-old car while daddy's little girl has a brand new car. I've personally had experience with it. But from the daughter's point of view, it's the raw form of jealousy and special treatment. It's not that she doesn't like the daughter. It's just a status competition on the stepmother's end. Again, if a wife, a new wife, doesn't feel like it's fair and equitable. for this daughter to have a brand new car, dude's got to hear it out, man. You got to hear that out from your lady. And maybe you consider that and you go, yeah, maybe, okay. You know, because it is your money to get. Rebecca doesn't work. I work. And I still, with Rebecca, say, hey, what do you think about this? And she says,

1:46:56I don't know about that. You had to call her about getting the new iPhone. You know what I mean? Like, you can't just go spend hundreds of dollars. Now, the reason that I do that, mainly, here's the reason that I do that, is because I know me. Boy, forget it. You know. I'm the same as you. No way in the world would I be able to just go buy something like that. I would talk to Todd, and that's about a cell phone. Hey, Mikey, you should correct yourself for sure. She doesn't work at a company. She works at the hardest job in the world. She's got a hard job. He's 100% right. He's 100 percent right. She doesn't bring home income, though. That's what that's the gist of this conversation. She makes it where he can bring in income and she handles the household. And I should correct myself, too. My wife does work. She does consulting. But, you know, I make the majority of the money. Yeah. And he's absolutely right. She's made the concession not to go to a typical nine to five job so that she can be at home. In fact, I'll put it as honestly as I possibly can.

1:48:02She actually really works. Right. What we do isn't work per se. No. It's really not. I mean, let's call it what it is. This is not really work. No, we're telling jokes and stuff like that. Doing character voices. We do some work. We get some stories together. We work hard. I'm not going to say. No, we work hard, but we're not digging ditches and we're not raising three kids either. Put it this way. At the job that we actually do, we work hard. Absolutely. physically, we're not doing anything compared to what my wife does. She's doing some stuff. 5701949. Man, M1 Eric from IB. You got a strong opinion. Go ahead. I do. I just wanted to say... This is Eric? Hello? Is this Eric? This is Erica. Oh, Erica. Sorry about that. That dude's got a high voice. Anyway. I just wanted to say that I think it's kind of strange that, yeah, he took all of his money out of the account and didn't let her know. And maybe it is because they don't get along. But no wonder. I mean, getting a car is kind of a big deal.

1:49:08And you would think that he would want her to come along if this is part of the stepmom's money, you know, to go to pick out the car, to maybe she would appreciate the stepmom more if she knew that half of her car came from her. Good point. That is, I mean, that's kind of what I was thinking, too, because I have a stepdaughter. And I was like, if I wasn't a part of that decision and that gift, it would crush me. Slap in the face. But you have a relationship with Jenna. It's like saying that I don't matter. It doesn't matter. You have a really good relationship. I have a really, I have a great relationship with her. good relationship or not, that's still a stepmother. She should be part of it. Yeah, and Todd made the effort to make sure that Sienna has a good relationship. And Sienna made the effort, too. Yeah. Here's the difference. A nine-year-old is a lot easier to have a relationship with than an 18-year-old because an 18-year-old hates everyone, at least in my book. At least in your house. Yeah. You need to be able to wait. You know, this is a good way to start getting in on that because when... When she rolls around to 23 or so and she comes back and she loves her dad and loves you. I was lucky because I got in when Jenna was only five. At some point, that will be an interesting topic for us. How come when we were 17 and 18, and I mean every human being listening right now, as you're driving in your car, if you're at work or you're home and all of us in this room, how come when we were 17 and 18, these. I think it's built into us, Mikey. It's hormones and it's, you think.

1:50:29You know everything. Well, think about it. It's got to be some kind of instinctual kind of get you to move out of your house and move on. Look how smart I am. Nobody can tell me what to do. And then you get out there and all of a sudden you get slapped in the face a few times. You're like, Mom. Yeah, where do you run to? I can't tell you the times I've shown up on my parents' doorstep with my hand out. Like, please help me. Not me. I'm like, I don't even need anything. Here's the breakdown, though. When we're 17 and 18, Jay's 100% right. We absolutely think to ourselves that we know everything. And in addition to that, we think, because, because you're older, you don't. And in addition to that, the reason that you don't, and I do, is because you were from stupid time. You grew up in stupid time. See, Dad, you didn't grow up. With Michael Jackson like I do. Dad, you don't even have a picture phone. Yeah, Dad. Yeah. You're lame, man. So you're lame. How could you possibly understand life the way that I understand life? You don't even text message. Are those Wranglers? Yeah. Are you wearing freaking Wranglers right now? Is a guy wearing Wranglers really going to tell me how to manage money? These are seven genes, pal.

1:51:47Yeah. We all think that. Times are different now, Mom. Oh, yeah. They kind of are. They are. They are. When it comes to school, though, it is harder now. There is no doubt about it that times have changed and that there is more technology in the world. You know what else has never changed? Jay knows 50 billion times more than Finn. Sorry, Finn, but that's the truth. Of course. But in Finn's mind and in my mind and in all of our minds, even Jay's mind when he was 17, we thought we had the world by the rocks and that we figured it out and that our parents, man, they were just, you almost felt sorry for them. Yeah, you're like, you're so clueless. You're bulletproof. Look how cute and clueless they are. So clueless. You're like, hey, Dad, what did Martin Scorsese direct? And your dad's like, I don't know. And you're like, you know why you don't know? Because you're dumb. Because you don't get it. You think I'm going to Jennifer's house? You idiot. I'm going to a party. Going to a party. And if you had one success going to that party, you felt like you knew everything. Yeah, exactly. That was part of the problem, too. I'll tell you what. My dad does not know who the Kings of Leon are. Queens. And you know how I know that my dad didn't know who the Kings of Leon are? I asked him yesterday. You did? I go, because my dad is actually a news junkie.

1:53:09and he watches the Today Show, and this Kings of Leon story was everywhere. Like, it was on the Today Show. It was on all the stuff. And it was so big that I was positive I was going to get to share a story about the Kings of Leon with my dad yesterday. Nice. And so the story is that Kings of Leon went on stage, pigeons pooped on them, and they left the stage, which caused us to say, That the Kings of Leon's were Sally's. And they kind of were. Yeah. And so my dad says, you know, when I was in the Navy, they used to tell us never look up. And I said, really? In terms of the birds? And he said, yeah. And the next statement made me laugh out loud. He goes, but there was always, and I can't say what my dad said, but he goes, but there was always that one a-hole. And I burst out. I mean, I just burst out. But it's 100% right that, you know, listen. But anyway, I want to talk to you about the Kings of Leon. Got an email that I want to do for you here coming up. And we'll do that in just a bit. You're listening to The Mikey Show on FM 94.9.

1:54:42This is the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar. This Thursday night, you can go to the Casbah and see the Night Marchers. Transfers doing two nights at the Casbah, Friday and Saturday night. The Temper Trap Playhouse, the Blues, August 4th. And Silver Sun Pickups play Soma, August 7th. Tokyo Police Club hit the Casbah, August 8th. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion is at Oceanside Pier August 29th. Green Day play cricket wireless with AFI September 2nd. And just announced Stone Temple Pilots are playing Viejas Arena with Black Rebel Motorcycle Club on September 16th. Tickets for that show go on sale this Friday. So there you have it. Get out there and see some shows. The FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar can be heard four times daily. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar at fm949sd.com. Ford's model year sales event is going on now. Time to get an incredible clearance price on a built Ford Tough truck. Like F-150, the best-selling pickup in America. Now with total cash back up to $5,500.

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2:01:33This report, it is brought to you by Allstate. Want to save money without cutting insurance coverage? Get Allstate today. Dollar for dollar. Nobody protects you like Allstate. On the 15 southbound before Mira Mesa Boulevard, an accident here. A couple cars partially moved to the right shoulder. Still waiting for one more flatbed tow truck to arrive. Also a problem here on the 5 southbound after the 163. It's a two-car injury accident. They are moving this off the freeway. They do have crews on the scene too. Don't let a bad battery unexpectedly. leave you stranded in the heat. Get to AutoZone for a ruggedly dependable Duralast battery, proven tough and only at AutoZone. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. I can back up like nobody's business into spots. What I can't do is parallel park. I just don't like the way beef tastes at all. I don't admit very often when I'm wrong. I have the fastest wiener dog on the planet. I love that. Happy movie. On FM 94.9. Sebastian Bach. Amazing vocalist. Sebastian Bach talks like this. So crazy. It's the way he talks. I couldn't tell by the way he sings. Mikey, what are you doing? Let's see. Ah, Mal Hall's going to be in here. One hour. He's funny. He is funny, man. He's going to be a star. He's going to be in TV or movies. Still young.

2:03:35Very, very, very funny comic. Right here from San Diego. And he's going to be in here, 9 o'clock this morning. I bet that if he ever played an outdoor venue and there were pigeons pooping, he'd still continue to play. He would stay. He'd stay. He would make jokes about it. He'd have a good time. He'd make jokes about it. He wouldn't be like, hey, listen, I'm going to big time everybody. I'm out of here. Yeah. Like the Kings of Leon did. Queens. Woods, he defends them to the nth degree. He does. That's right. They're my boys. He's the fan club manager. He's the fan club manager. He manages their website. I wish I did. Sorry, fan site. I wish I did. Fan site. Hey, good morning, Mikey Show. Hey, Dave. Sorry, man. This is Dave Matthews. Look at him with a robe. You got a brand new robe. Somebody gave you a new robe? Yeah, Garrett gave it to me, man. That's good. Probably because the other one was old. Program director, man. He offered me a job here, but...

2:04:33I got other stuff going on. I've been writing again, writing songs, staying clean. You know, just weed and whiskey. Now that's it. Wow. Two W's. Yeah, weed and whiskey. You know, the thing is, is that I always know who's in the stall. when I walk into the bathroom because I see a pair of slippers. And you smell the patchouli. And the patchouli oil. That's right. And I see an open robe and I hear a newspaper. And so I always know. Crunching on cereal. I got to get my news, man. I read that story and I got to say, man, I got to disagree with Woods. I think those guys are Sally's, man. You do? I'd rather enjoy it. You're talking about... You enjoy being pooped on? I enjoy my pigeons, absolutely. I enjoy it, man. It's natural. You know, it's good for the soul. It's good for the soul is what it is. It's good for the skin, I think, too. And the skin, look at my skin. It's creamy. You know what it is? It is creamy and beautiful. It's really dirty, though. It's filthy. I could use a shower. I could. You have a bat in the cave, too. Do I? Yeah. Dave Matthews? Dave Matthews? Dave Matthews just looked at Sienna and mouthed, really? I said, no, not really. No, not really, Dave. She's messing with you.

2:05:45Are you a guy on marijuana cigarettes? Maybe. Dave. Dave. Dave Matthews. Stoner. You got anything to munch on? Yeah. You're some nuts over here. Why don't you not smoke marijuana anymore? Maybe you keep your eyes on your own paper, Mikey. What's good for you ain't good for me. It's not good for you. I don't think it's good for you. I think it's bad. I'm eating my trail mix. Dave Matthews. Let me ask you a question. You're telling me that when you play concerts and there's pigeons pooping on you, it doesn't bother you? Not at all, man. You can throw bottles of beer at me, whatever, man. 99 bottles? You fire bricks up there, whatever, man. I'm going to play because they paid to see Dave Matthews. That's who they're going to see. That's true. It's a name on the marquee. Well, that may be true, but I don't think that you would ever in any situation be okay with pigeons pooping on you. Absolutely. I beg to differ. Do you know how many nights I slept in the park? I think he'd be just fine. Hundreds of nights in the park. I don't know how that's possible. I wrote a little song for the Kings of Leon. You did? I did. Do you want to do it? Yeah, I laid the track down early and I'm going to do the vocals live. So I recorded it early this morning. So if it's a little off, you know, let me know. I've been up all night. You're always a little off, buddy. Dave Matthews in the studio. It's amazing. You fly over.

2:07:17And do your thing Crap on me now Crap on me again Don't put your claws in me My friend But crap on me pigeon If you can Might be due But that's alright Crap on me I'll stink at night Gross for some But not Grow for me. Oh, when you perch crop onto me. Oh, my God. Maybe crop onto. Oh, my God. You're ridiculous. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Crop onto. All right. All right. I got it. I got it. I got it. I think I understand it. Stop it. Stop. Stop. For crying out loud. Dave. Wow, it's pretty. That was the most gorgeous song that I've ever heard. Thank you. Bravo! I missed you. Thank you, Sienna. That was great. Don't crap onto that. I gotta go number two. It got weird. Got weird. You're a weird guy. It's Dave Matthews. He actually lives in the radio station. I don't know why or how that started. I do.

2:08:44He just wanders around. I think I know why. Why? I think they kicked him out of the band, but he doesn't know it. It's just called the band. Yeah, exactly. Familiar. Wow. You mean because you're talking about the group in the 70s, right? They sang Wait and other things like that. There is a... Weird thing with this Guinness Book of World Records. I don't know if you've heard this story. The Guinness Book of World Records, you could do anything to get into the Guinness Book of World Records. Anything. Anything, right? And something really weird just got this guy into the Guinness Book of World Records. What is it? This Indian man holds the record in the Guinness World Records for the longest ear hair. I challenge him. Oh, gross. I've got him where I want him. I would, too.

2:09:44Well, he holds the record for 5.2 inches, but he's upset because he wants an update. It's been, you know, five years since he set the record, and now his ear hair is much longer. It's now 11 inches. Really? That's like a ruler sticking out of your ear. Yeah. Ew. I have a surprise for you guys. What is it? I found him. You did? I found him. You found the ear hair? No, I found the guy. Oh. The world record holder, and I interviewed him. No. I did. Check it out. Hey, this is Woods, and I'm standing here with Radha Cantbazpie. This is a huge moment for me in my life. Radha, you have just set the Guinness World Record for the longest ear hair, 5.2 inches. How do you feel right now? I eat so much. It's okay. The crowd loves him. Soak it in. This is not going to happen again. Soak it in. Thank you. Look around. Look around you. Drink all this in, man. You did it. You did it, Rod. Rod. I did it. You did it. I did it. How do you feel right now in this moment? Unbelievable. Unbelievable. I did it.

2:10:54You did it, man. Blowing his nose into your hair. I want to thank my training coach who all along said, eat protein, eat protein. And I said, I do it. And I even said to him, you're stupid. You're stupid. It will not grow faster. But he knew. He knew. And here it is today. I've been in the presence of a lot of great athletes in my day. But like I said, this for me is a very, very special moment. Let me ask you this, Radha. What's next? Disneyland. I want to say Disneyland is next for me. And I want to also say I am so happy to be a part of the Nike Pro family. And I love you so much. Nike Pro. Nike Pro. Nike Pro. Man, again, what a great pleasure for me. Orlando Disney. Orlando Disney. What a great pleasure for me. I'm in the presence of greatness. Radha Kent Bosch Pai of Kanpur. You did it, man. Thank you. You did it. Thank you. Sherwin Williams. What? Radha. Give me your hair. Sounds like he's...

2:12:11Got some endorsements already. Do you guys have any idea how long it took me to track that guy down? I can't imagine. Did you have to go to Kampur? Yeah, where was he? Kampur is, I don't know if that's on the top ten destinations in the world. I don't either, but it wasn't great. They had a nice Hampton in there. Yeah, it was a nice continental breakfast. Well done, Woods. I bet. Thanks. Let's see. How would you guys like? It's so random. How would you guys like to do a little old-time radio? Uh, yes. Welcome, everyone, to Old Time Radio. This is the segment of the Mikey Show where we transform ourselves. Back in time to discover the wonders of radio back in the olden days. To see what radio was really like way back when. And this is Orson Welles. Your producer of a special series of broadcasts presented by the makers of Pat's Blue Ribbon. Imagine if we did that now. Yeah. Brought to you by PBR. It's delicious. Drink it in a paper bag. Well, you know what? I think the irony there is that it's such a serious take. Oh, yeah. And the sponsor is a get-time beer. I know. It was a good-time beer. Back then, it was the bee's knees. Yeah. I mean...

2:13:37It's the finest beer available right now, Michael. Remember, it is 1937. That's true. Mercury Summer Theater of the Air. Full orchestra in the studio playing, by the way. That's how they did it. You think Garrett would go for us hiring an orchestra? Just to play all of our background music? Yeah. Why wouldn't he? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Would Garrett, our programmer, be okay? We'd get an orchestra to just stand in here and play all of our music. All our bumper music. Yeah, that's right. Tonight and every Friday night. Pabst Blue Ribbon presents you with a front row seat at one of the greatest... That's right. Get a buzz with Pabst Blue Ribbon, and you'll never get another buzz again. You know, Michael, I'm the salesman that sold that Pabst Blue Ribbon account. Do you know how much I sold it for? How much? $4 now. I wrecked him over the coals. See? $4.5 stealing money from a baby. He wanted to give me two bits, but I raised him up to $4. Now, granted, it's a three-year contract. We're going to wait it out. Please have a produce.

2:14:40So while America's famous producer, writer, director Orson Welles entertained you, pour yourself a tall frosted glass of Pat's Blue Ribbon. And you know what? Get schnockin'. Enjoy at the same time great theater and this truly great beer. 33 fine brews blended into one great beer. Drink some beer. Drink some beer. Drink some beer. Don't get loaded. How come we don't do that anymore, by the way? How come we don't sing like that anymore? We should, yeah. You should start singing your noose, you know? Yeah. That'd be terrifying. And today in Comfort, there's some old man here, and the keys are bandit, we'll start it again. This evening, Mr. Wells and the Mercury players bring to the microphone the great romance by Alexander Dumas, the Count of Monte Cristo.

2:15:43Can you imagine? Can you imagine? Why the Mercury players? Like, they're sitting around a boardroom table. They're like, what do you guys think? Neptune. How about Neptune? The unforgettable planet. Too far. Pluto. The Pluto player. Saturn's got rings. I don't like it. I do not want to listen to The Count of Monte Cristo on the radio. It's a book. Oh, I don't know. I don't know. When it's acted out with fake horse hooves. Woods just did a horse sound with his lips and spit oatmeal. No, it was a foul. It was snuff. He spit Copenhagen. Oh, my God. He spit Copenhagen. It flew apart. Oh, my gosh. This poor pregnant woman looks like she's about to Ralph all over the place. Oh, my God. I watched it happen.

2:16:44I did, too. And it went not just one place, but everywhere. I look like Sienna saw a bank robbery. Oh, my God. The thing is, may I present the most... It's like Minnie Mouse. Did he say her name was Mercedes? It seems like a little key. Yeah, Mercedes. I know a stripper here in 1932. Her name is Mercedes. Get your friend Portia over and let's go have a diner. My cousin BMW can't make it. What's wrong with having a car named your name? The Count of Monte Cristo, the Baroness Mondiego. I am deeply honored. I'm also deeply perverted. Right now, I'm sitting in the nude, in just black socks, smoking a cigarette in the corner. Enjoy a pipe on my behalf. What is it, Mercedes, you will? It's nothing for none. Will you give me your arm, Count Monte Cristo? That would leave me with wine.

2:18:00That's not your army pervert. Oh, gross. Is it true, Count, what everyone is saying about you? What are they saying? Uh-oh. Is it true what they say about you? That you've seen so much, traveled so far, and suffered so deeply. I have suffered deeply, madame. That's true. I thought she loved me well enough to wait for me, and even to remain faithful to my grave. When I returned, she was married. She's a too much hussy. Come into my arms. Holy cow. I love old time. I do too. It kills me every time. Just picture myself, chin in my hands, 1936, just listening to the Count of Money Crystal on the radio. Sipping on some Ovaltine. And going, Dad. PBR. That's right. And I go.

2:18:57Father, why do they talk that way on the radio? We're 70 years away from sipping on gin and juice. It'll be quite a while. Right now it's Ovaltine. 70 years, Snoop Doggy will be doing it with gin and juice. So great. Snoop Doggy. Doggy. Snoop Doggy Dog. Arf. Hey Mikey Show, please help me with my husband. We've been married 10 years. We have a solid relationship. We have two boys ages 6 and 9. My husband's a good father, but doesn't help very much with the kids. He works all the time when he's at work and when he gets home. I need him to put down the phone and computer and help me feed the boys and get them to bed. He says that he already has one full-time job and that since I don't work, I should consider that my job. What are your thoughts? I'm really getting tired of grinning and bearing it. M1 Christy. I talked about this earlier. This is hard for me. The reason it's hard is because my wife does all the heavy lifting when it comes to those kids. We have three boys. Two of them are twins. One of them's got an attitude problem. They're almost one, too. They're going to be a year old. And she does the heavy lifting. She takes care of those boys. Now, we have a little bit of help, but for the most part, she's taking care of those boys. Now, when I get home, the boys are usually going down for their nap.

2:20:25which I take the opportunity to catch a nap. I get up at 1.30, and so I take an opportunity to catch a nap. When I wake up, it's important for me to spend a little bit of time playing with Jake. Now, I'll say playing with Jake because it isn't easy for me to play with the boys, with the twins, because they're a year old. I don't know if any other men experience this, but I don't have... a internal desire to spend time with the little ones. I don't have that. I don't know if that's, if that's, if people think that that's monstrous. All I can tell you is, is that as Jake has gotten into an age where we understand one another, I love hanging out with Jake. But when they're little and they do the goo goo and the gaga thing, not the lady gaga thing, just the gaga thing, I don't.

2:21:24I don't know what to do. I'm bad at this. This is not me sitting on the floor with the boys sitting there and blocks and a book. And I'm just I'm I don't I'm not very good at it. But I also, as you guys know, holy cow, man, I do. I have a lot of show work and it isn't BS. It's real. And it takes a lot of time. And so I will. be working and I and my wife is doing the stuff with the kids and I know it's a beating my wife has told me that she that she part of the way that she interprets love is for me to be spending time with her and to be spent and to desire to spend time with the kids which I didn't have innately and I told a friend of mine that I had lunch with about a month ago

2:22:25I had to pray for God to give me a thing to desire those children because I didn't have it. And now I do. Now I get home and I really want to walk up to those boys and play with them and be with them and stuff. But I struggle with this email because I go, holy cow, Christy has a point. My wife had a point when she said, I need you to spend some time with me and the boys. They all have a point. When Jake was one, was that hard then? And it's just now easier because he's bigger? It didn't get to be easier with Jake until he turned three. And he's about four weeks from being four. But up until three years old, I didn't know what to do with him. I didn't know how to have fun with him. And when I did, I was bored. And it was a struggle. It was like...

2:23:24really difficult that's you know and that's i've heard of this before i mean um a gentleman i used to work for had a brand new baby and i mean we're talking 18 19 hour days this guy worked and his thing was i can't relate right now and when the kid is three four or five when they start talking and interacting he's a big person that's really in on interaction and when he can't interact with somebody It was the exact same thing. So you're not alone in that. You've got to build that bond, though. I mean, even though you don't have that much. I mean, yeah, I didn't get in. I wasn't when they were goo-goo-ga-ga. But when they started to be able to walk and crawl, that was cool. But you've just got to do it. You've got to put the time in because, man, those moments are so precious. I mean, from having so many kids, I'm so thankful that I have Jasper now because it's just like I could super focus on him where I think I lost some of the time with the other ones when they were really. really little, just because I was busy. And there's nothing more important. I mean, when you die, you're not going to go, gosh, I wish I had worked more. Man, work was cool. And here's one thing to speak to. This doesn't speak specifically to your, I guess, problem, you would call it, Mike, or maybe just, I don't know, just situation more. That stuck with me when my sister was...

2:24:40kind of going, leaving the hospital with her newborn, there was one thing that the nurse was stressing to her husband. She was saying, you know, you're going to be the one that goes to work and she's going to stay home. She's going to help take care of the baby and everything. But, you know, she's got a 24 hour a day job. And, you know, you have, keep in mind all the stress that you have. She's doing it 24 hours and she can't physically have the strength to keep that up for 24 hours, which means she won't be able to give the, you know, the correct. in this in this case in terms of breastfeeding she won't have the the strength to even produce enough milk if she doesn't have a little bit of help so you have to remember even though when you come home it's like okay well i already worked a full day this is my time to come home and this is my place of rest that the woman that's still at home that's where she works too so i think a lot of people run into that problem when the minute that the husband walks in the door it's like when the wife is home with the kids, this is her time where she wants to go. Okay, now your turn. And this is the time when the husband wants to go. There's no doubt about it. I just want to say, as openly as I can, there may be dads that are listening right now that really, really enjoy doing that playtime with their kids. And I have to, yeah, that'll be woodsy. Yeah, for sure. And I have to tell you, in honesty, that for me,

2:26:06It's a selfless act that the other day, Jake wanted to play a game and I had stuff to do. I had a lot of stuff to do. And I said in my head, I'm going to play this game with him and I'm not going to do that right now. I'll do it. I'm going to give this at least 15 minutes of sitting there playing that game with him. And I didn't like it. I didn't like it at all. But I, in my head said, this is important. this is eternal. This is more important than me doing whatever it is that I'm going to do. Kind of like Jay said, at the end of my life, I'm not going to look back and go, man, if only one more bit. And I will tell you this too. I'll say this too. The Mikey show, our ratings are not just high. They're phenomenally high. And we all are, we're constantly, constantly, constantly. At some point I examine it and I go, isn't there always more?

2:27:10Yeah. And there are always more, you know, like. It can always be bigger, better. Yeah, like I said, it's almost as if there's no satisfaction unless every human in San Diego is listening to the show. Yeah. Even though our. It's like every human in the world you want, you know. Honestly. And that applies to every job. There's always more work that you can be doing, more organizing, more getting ahead. And I think it's important to set, whether it be a time frame or a specific time of the night, to go, okay, I'm going to. turn off my phone or I'm going to at least put it out of the room. I'm not going to answer an email. Like I'm going to put importance over priority. Absolutely. And I have to remind myself, God didn't put me on planet earth to do the ding dong sing along. It's great that I get to, but that isn't the point. It's just, it's not the point for me in my life. It's worshiping God and caring for my wife and my, my kid.

2:28:08And it ain't always easy, man, because I want what I want all the time. We all do. 570-1949 is our number if you want to give us a call. I'm not saying that the country is obsessed with President Obama. All I'm going to tell you is that when we come back, you will hear audio of President Obama ordering a sandwich. 570-1949. 949mikey at gmail.com. How did you morons even get in here? More coming up on FM 94.9. You don't want to miss your chance to hit the surf and have sand stuck in your butt all day. That's how we say hello. At the FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. The party at the beach is coming August 29th at the Oceanside Pier Amphitheater. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Miller Lite and Sion. Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros. Rogue Wig. The Wigs. And the Delta Spirit.

2:29:32The silent comedy, the nervous records of burning of Rome, and White Apple Tree. Get your tickets for $30 today. No service fees or extra charges. Get them online at fm949sd.com or independencejam.com. Eight vans at the beach. Get tickets and join the party. August 29th in Oceanside. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Honest Tea. Musicians, Guitar Center's throwing a huge birthday party, celebrating 46 years in the business. We've been prepping for months to bring you limited edition gear, exclusives, and birthday deals. It's Guitar Center's 46th Anniversary Celebration, and it kicks off Friday. Get our lowest price ever on Line 6 Spider 3 apps, $59. While supplies last, $100 instant rebates on all M-Box 2s. Plus, get awesome financing and enter for your chance to win a million bucks. It's Guitar Center's 46th Anniversary Celebration.

2:30:52online hey guys it's woods and i've been telling you for the last week or so about a life-changing event that happened to me it's when i went to clearview eye and laser medical center and i met with dr sandy t feldman and her staff and they really made me feel at home and basically i got my eyes done i got lasik surgery i have 20 20 vision now in both eyes i can surf without worrying about my contacts i can play baseball i'm batting 400 by the way Really, the most important thing about those guys is their professionalism and also their affordability that they can offer to you. They offer 18-month special financing subject to credit approval. Finally, you guys can afford Clear Vision, too. All you've got to do is call them, let them know that I sent you. Call them at 858-452-3937 or go check them out at clearvieweyes.com. You know what? Those guys are going to treat you right. I promise. I wouldn't steer you in the wrong direction. They are amazing out there. My car wouldn't start, and when I looked up, they were standing on my dashboard. My brakes were making this horrible sound, and when I looked over, they were on the front seat right next to me. So cute. It's true. Pep Boys bobbleheads have been popping up all over America. Whether it's tires, parts, or service, Manny, Moe, and Jack will be there when you need them most.

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2:35:43This report, it is brought to you by Big O Tires. Now through August 15th, the Big O Tires get a 50,000-mile 14-inch tire, only $49. 15-inch, $59. 16-inch, $69. Restrictions apply. Big O Tires, call 1-800-NEW-TIRE. Well, it looks like we've got a big problem here on the 5 northbound Gilman Drive. It's an injury accident. Up to four cars involved. One of them is blocking that left lane. Looks like this may have all been caused by a car that was stalled in the center divider. Emergency crews are heading on the scene. They've got the two left lanes blocked. You can definitely expect some delays. On the 15 southbound before Mira Mesa Boulevard, an accident here. A couple cars moved to the right shoulder. They're still waiting for one more flatbed tow truck to arrive. Traffic is pretty slow as you approach the scene. This report, it's brought to you by Quiznos. Brought to you by Quiznos 543 Value Menu. Get a great lunch for $5, $4, or $3. Quiznos. Toasty. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. Don't really like to swim. Unlike most Latinos. Lauren. I got a little pepper up my nose. Had to sneeze. I can put down a 20 pack of chicken nuggets. No problem. I'm like a little bit Irish. There's everything white I am. And Jake. No, I didn't cry. I'm a man. On FM 94.9. I came to dance, dance, dance.

2:37:17That is the number one pop song in the country, Tal Cruz. Song's called Bunny. Song's growing on me. Rihanna and Eminem's new song is going to be number one soon. Really? If you haven't heard it, it's so good. That sounds good. Even Woods was singing it this morning. By the way, tonight's 8 o'clock album, Nico Case blacklisted. Sienna, what's going on in news? Well, crews, the BP crews took another step yesterday towards getting that relief well ready. They are expected to permanently seal the Gulf well very soon. And they removed the plug that they put in before they had to clean out due to the tropical storm Bonnie last week. But next, the relief well is going to be flushing. Well, the relief well should be done beginning of next week. But just so you know, yesterday marked the 100th day since... The well burst. Really? On the 20th of April. 100 days. So it's like, you know, I'm optimistic telling the story, but still it's like, all right, it's been 100 days, you know? Let's get this done. Also, legislators in the Catalonia region of Spain, which is Barcelona, voted to ban bullfighting in that area of Spain. So just that area? Just that area, yeah. And a lot of it has to do with, you know, it's...

2:38:31bullfighting, being cruel to the animals. And then other people are saying it's also because, you know, that Catalonia is a really wealthy region and they like to show how they're different from the rest of Spain. Of course. Yeah. Of course. Welcome back. I have twin boys, Luke and Ryan. And in August, the boys will be a year old. Ryan is the sweetest kid. So sweet. Brown haired, blue eyed kid. Always got a smile on his face. Just so shy and cute. Luke, the joke is now, oh my gosh, look, Luke doesn't have a skull. You know, that guy has got a little bit of an attitude thing going on. Just a little bit. You can see if you look at him, you know, there's just a little bit of an attitude going on. 11 months old and he's on the line right now. This is my son, Luke. What are you doing? What do you think I'm doing? I'm working. What do you think I'm doing? Who's Ryan?

2:39:33Ryan do you speak of? Ryan is your brother, your twin brother. Jake, you mean? No, I mean Ryan. I mean your brother, your twin brother, Ryan, that you're close to, that you're close to. Whatever. Hey, I need a favor when you come home. Okay. I need you to go to Sports Authority and I need a tent. I need a sleeping bag. I'm going camping with some of my boys. No, you're not. No, you're not. Some of your boys? Your boys. Who are these boys? Well, they're friends of mine that I met at Tumble Time. And we are in a little gang now, if you must know. No, don't say that. It's a good boys gang. And we're going to go camping this weekend. Really bond. But I don't have, you know, if any of you guys know my old man, you guys know that guy's never camped anywhere except outside of McDonald's. Apple store. I've camped out in front of you. Yeah, and the Apple store, of course. Sheryl Crow concert. Really? Wait, Luke, do you even know what to pack? Do you have your bottles and your diapers? 11 months old. Yeah, I don't take bottles or diapers. They don't make sleeping bags that small. They don't. I think I saw that.

2:40:38My dad had a Louis Vuitton sleeping bag. I don't have a Louis Vuitton sleeping bag. I don't. So, hey, when you're down there at Sports Authority, maybe you pick yourself up a treadmill, too, and take that ride for yourself. Listen to me, all right? You're getting precocious. What's that mean? It means that you're getting to be a rascal. What's that mean? It means that you're... You don't need to know the definition of everything that I say. So, yeah, tent, sleeping bag, cooler. If you want to pick up a case of beer, that's fine. If not, I don't. And I won't. I don't and I won't. And you don't drink that anyway. You don't even know what beer is. As far as you know. Hey. Hey. Yes. What time are you going to get home? You know what time I get home. I get home at 10 every time. It's always the same time. You know I get off at 10. Are you going to pick me up or are you just going to stop on your way because it's right down at the end of the street? I'm not going to go get you. I have the best visual of the two of you. I'm going to grab mom's credit card and then we don't have to tell her. No, you're not. We don't have to tell her. We'll just go down together. We'll do a little father-son bonding. What are you going to go camping with your friends from tumble time? Yeah, we're going camping. What are you going to eat? Whatever. Live off the land. You guys going to do your tumbles out in the wilderness? Maybe we eat mushrooms. What? We're in a good boys gang. Good boys. Good boys don't eat mushrooms. Yeah.

2:42:00No, I'm not going to pick you up, Luke. Thank you for the call. Goodbye. Oh, great. Mike, you're a dead man. I know it. It's really something else. When that kid is 15 years old, wow. I'm afraid. When he's 15 months old. That's true. Good point. Look out. So this is a really crazy piece of audio. We infatuated with the president when we're... Having sound clips of him ordering a sandwich? When I was 20, I could order a 12-inch. I'm turning 49 next week, which means I need just a half. He's so skinny. That is President Obama ordering a sub sandwich at Tasty Sub Shop in New Jersey. I don't think you... Oh, and Edison. That's right. Oh, yeah. Edison. That's right.

2:42:55That's where they filmed a lot of the Sopranos. There you go. I don't think he realized what was half of a 12-inch. I think he hesitated for a while. He's like, I'll get the half. I'll take the half. Half of the 12. The half of the 12. Whatever half of the 12 is. He's there to support small business owners and stuff like that. Great. Spent $7 there. We'll really keep him in the red. It's called the 6-inch, my friend. Let's see what you guys think about this. See where you guys sign up for this one. How important is it to a dude for his future wife to sign a prenup? How important is it? And now, this is percentage, okay? Depends on if we're dealing with a baller or not. 30, 20%. Shot caller? Well, here are the choices. It is not at all important. It's not very important. It's somewhat important. Or it's very important. It's not very important. Okay, Woodsy says not very important. Somewhat. Sienna says the guys would say somewhat. Not very. Lauren says not very. How about you, Jay? Not very. Not very. And the winner is Woodsy and Jay. And Lauren. I thought Lauren said very important. No, not very. Oh, oh, oh. You said not very important. Yeah. Yeah, you guys are right. In fact, it was a tie. They must be marrying some cougars. 34% of the people.

2:44:27Said not at all important, and 34% said not very important. 23% said somewhat, and 9% said very. Ballers. Yeah. How about this? Do breakups, this question was asked of men, askmen.com, do breakups have to be face-to-face? What percentage said yes, they do? What percentage said no? It is acceptable to break up over the phone. And what percentage said, no, it is only acceptable to break up, or excuse me, no, it is acceptable to break up via text or another messaging service? I'd say majority said phone's okay. I said, I think 80% said yes, face-to-face is important. I think 62% said yes, face-to-face. Jay? I agree with Woods, 80%. 81%. Wow. Way to go, guys. Big brain on Brad. Said that breakups have to be face-to-face. Now, I haven't always followed that rule. I'm trying to think just because every guy I know has broken up in another way. I may have done a text bit, too. I remember really, really well a girl breaking up with me face-to-face, and I hated it. And would have preferred she did it over the phone.

2:45:55I would have preferred she did it over the phone. Way preferred that. That's a bad convo, man. It's like a four-hour deal. Yeah. Every time. Well, and I think that it puts the person in the position of you can't escape me. Right. You have to sit in front of me until I deem it's over. Right. But don't you at least owe them? Yeah, you've invested that. Owe them the courtesy of not having to sit in front of you like a prisoner until you're done with your narcissistic breakup. Yeah, but usually you need to give things back and a little hug. And look them in the eye to be like. And you get one last slay in, too. And most of the time they say, you know, I think we need to break up. There's like a think or something in there. So it's like, well, you think we do? So what does that mean? Right. How refreshing would it be for somebody to sit down and go, listen, I'm breaking up with you. And that's the purpose of our meeting. We're here right now. I would think you're a monster. I'm breaking up with you. People absolutely do that. You know what I'd say to you? That's the way you're doing it? See, there's no good way to do it. No. Well, I mean, I just don't want to. Here's the deal. When I got broken up in person, I remember that I was like, holy cow, I think my eyes are going to fill up with tears. Yeah. And I was like, I don't want her to see this. Why didn't she do this on the phone? She wouldn't see it. And then I could pretend that my eyes weren't filling up with tears. Because then you'd be like, what a monster.

2:47:09She did it over the phone. No way. Give me courtesy. I think it's courtesy to not make somebody have to sit there in front of you and look miserable. I want it. You want face-to-face? I'd prefer it, yeah. Really? Yes. At least want to be able to, you know, if there's any pleading your case or stating, it's like, really? This is what you want? I mean, that's cool. But if that's what you want, there's no coming back. You know, there's not going to be. Isn't there? Yeah. No, there's not. Not with me. We've all done the comeback. We've all done the comeback. We all dip our toes in. Feels real good sometimes. We weren't getting back together. We were just dipping our toes in. Sienna, how would you prefer a guy break up with you? My fate. To your face? Yeah. How come? Todd and I broke up a few times. Once was over the phone and once was face to face. And I could tell because I like when we did the face to face one, I mean, he was crying and it was like I knew that it wasn't easy. You know, on the phone, it seems like you're not really worth my time later. We're done. You know, on the phone, at least I could physically see that he was hurting, too. No one, by the way, no one addresses that you're on the phone when you break up on the phone. No one addresses that fact. Yeah. What do you mean? What I mean is nobody goes.

2:48:23I hate to do this on the phone. Nobody goes, hey, I know I'm doing this on the phone. It's always just breakup. But if I were on the other end, I would absolutely say, oh, you can't even sit down with me face to face? You're going to do this over the phone? What would I say to that? It's too hard, baby. It's just too hard to do face to face. I think I would say to you, I'm only doing what I would prefer. Well, you're not me. I'm sorry. I'll come over. Have you paid attention to me? And then I would. I would. I'll come over. I'll come over. Lauren, I would be like, I'm afraid if I come to your house, you're going to slit my throat. And that's why I'm literally scared for my life. That's why I'm at my house with my pistol. I would say, okay, fine. I'll come over, Lauren. but I'm going to wear riot gear. And I'm bringing my 38. Just so you know. At that point, I'd be like, no, don't come over. You blew it. If I say you, if I go. You should come over in the first place. Let's have this conversation. But then it's like you already know that you're going to break up. Now I know. Now I'm not going to be home when you come home. She wants to get one last dig in at you to make you feel like a turd.

2:49:39Yeah, because you are one. That's the bit. Do you want to get one last dig in me? Yes, if you're a turd. No, no, no. Let's have the conversation. Okay, so I just broke up with you on the phone. Okay. What do you say? Really? You're going to do this over the phone? You didn't even have the courtesy to do this to my face? After all that we've been through? I didn't want to do to you what I wouldn't want done to me. But you're not me. Did you pay attention to me at all during this relationship? Done. I'm sorry. You're right. I'll be right there. No, I don't want to see you now. Why would I want to see you now so I can sit here and wait for 20 minutes? Oh, wait, no, make that 30 minutes because you're probably going to have to stop and get gas and then you're going to forget your wallet. Wait a second. Are you doing this because you just want to get one last dig in at me? Absolutely. Well, that's not very nice. Well, it's not very nice to call somebody up to break up with them either. Oh, well, then two wrongs make a right. Yeah. How does it feel?

2:50:29Awful. It feels awful. Well, you filled me up with hate and anger, and now this is what you get, buddy. She's good. I'm the monster. This is the calmest breakup conversation ever. Mikey would say, well, you know, Lauren, anger is just hurt, sadness, and fear. And I go, yeah, well, you filled me with hurt, sadness, and now I'm fearful that I might smash your head in. Smash your head in. Punching the teeth. Nice little joke slam, real good. Rebecca and I have very calm. I have very... I have very rational arguments with Rebecca. I can picture you two. Mine have a little bit of a bite. Mine got a little sting. They're calm and filled with sting. I would never want to fight with you. I'm a passive-aggressive fighter. You are? Oh, yeah. You've seen Woods and I in the ring. Oh, boy. Oh, yeah. That's true. That's true. You're real passive-aggressive on you real quick. He likes to throw little snide comments in here and there. Oh, the snide comments. Oh, yeah, I'll get you. Oh, Jamie, I'm sorry. Why don't you just say it? I'm real calm when I fight. Are you? Are you? Maybe you like to scream at people. Yeah.

2:51:35Maybe. Maybe. That wasn't exactly screaming. No, it was screaming. I don't know. It was very venomous words. No, it wasn't yelling at all. It was an elevated level. It was an elevated level. You knew that I meant business. Woods and Jay got into a little altercation earlier this week. I knew that you were a clown. Oh. All right. Because he's wearing big, floppy red shoes. That's how you knew. Big hands, big feet. That's right. All right. Oh, my gosh, Jay. Where's my Sharpie? Where's my Sharpie? Where's my Sharpie? Somebody quick. Spit out. Spit out. Spit out. Surgeon and surgery over there. Problem adverted, problem adverted. Get you one of those little Sharpie keychain things and just strap it on your belt. Where is my Sharpie? Why don't you just hook it to your chain wallet? This next one is going to polarize people. Comfortable with your partner friending their exes on Facebook? Are you comfortable with that? Here's the deal. Here are the options. Yes, absolutely I am. No. And yes, but only if I have met him before. Define exes. Girlfriends or husbands. Really? Yeah, you do. Both. Okay, one yes, the other no. And this is coming from guys. If a guy thinks this is okay. This was asked of men. Just making sure. No, but it says only if I met him. So again, are you comfortable with your partner friending?

2:53:04Her exes on Facebook. This comes from a guy's perspective. Yeah, and here are the choices. Yes, absolutely. No. Or yes, but only if I've met him before. Woods? Say the majority say no. You say the majority say no. Really? I'd say 65% say no. Really? I'd say with dudes, it'd be like 60% yes. But they're okay with it. Yeah. I would say with dudes if they met them. I'd say no way. I mean, I would say that. I know I would say no way. You as women would say no. No way. Maybe if I met her. If I met her and I knew that. No. No way. It just depends on what an ex meets. Sometimes you can date someone for like a month or two and technically they're an ex. If it's an ex that you know of and you know that there was something there. My answer would be if I know them. Really? Yeah. If I know. Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I take that back. I take that back. I take that back. I take that back. I take that back. Think about it. Scratch that. That is incorrect. I would not be okay with my wife friending an ex-boyfriend even if I knew him. What if he friended her and she accepted him? No, I would not be okay with that. Really? Me neither. No, I would not be okay with that. Really? No. Oh, boy. And you know what I really don't buy? There's a reason that they're an ex. Do you guys have an arranged marriage? Hey, listen.

2:54:27If it's true that there's a reason that they're an ex, then maybe there's a reason you click ignore. Maybe there's a reason they should be an ex-friend, too. They're not a good person if you didn't want to be with them. Well, they're not right for you. Yeah, they're not right for you to... Lauren was right. 41% of men said, yes, absolutely it's okay for my partner to friend their ex on Facebook. 41% said that. 31% said, no way. And 28% said, yeah, but only if I've met him before. If you asked a girl that question, maybe 99% would say, no way, is that okay? I mean, that's split fairly evenly, though. Yeah? I don't buy those guys. The yes wins out, but... I could care less. As long as it's not her ex-husband, I don't care. If it was an ex-boyfriend? Yeah, care less. How come? She's married to me. I know that. It doesn't bother me. She's not married to the ex anymore, so why does that matter? Yeah, because they were married. What's the difference? I don't like him. There's a difference. It's the only ex he knows of. There's a difference because they went through the vows just like you did, you know? Absolutely. Is that the deal? Yeah, and the fact that he's a giant clown. So that may have something to do with it. Get. Yeah, get. Exactly. I say get. Maybe I take him out and rough talk him. I come out here and rough talk him and run him off. And that is exactly how I met my wife.

2:55:54You are a clown. You got a big red old floppy shoes right now. A flower lapel squirts water at me. Paul is going to be in the studio coming up here in just a minute. Don't go away. He's coming up next. Be a part of the Mikey Show now. 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9.

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3:03:59or stop by our UFC pre-party this Sunday at 1 p.m. This report is brought to you by Allstate. Want to save money without cutting insurance coverage? Get Allstate today. Dollar for dollar, nobody protects you like Allstate. In National City, the 5 southbound at 8th Street, we've got some kind of wood debris that's in the third lane from the left. CHP did run a traffic break to clear it, but it's still just a little slow as they move out of the way. 15 southbound before Mira Mesa Boulevard, an accident here. A couple cars moved to the right shoulder. They do have a flatbed tow truck that's on the scene right now. And also on the 5 north, We're found after the 52 signal alert here. It's an injury accident. Four cars involved. One block in the left lane. Emergency crews are on the scene. This report also brought to you by AutoZone. Don't let a bad battery unexpectedly leave you stranded in the heat. Get to AutoZone for ruggedly dependable Duralast battery. Proven tough and only at AutoZone. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9.

3:04:57Real sweetly, Woods. Real sweetly. Welcome back to the show. There are five people on The Mikey Show. Myself, Woods, Lauren, Sienna, and Jay. We have a phone screener named Chris. And we were just having an extremely fun conversation with Mal Hall, who is in the studio with us right now. Maybe he sits in every day. That was fun. How about you put your cell phone away, Mal? That's right.

3:05:52You're on a radio show right now. Is that what this is? What is this microphone in front of my face? What are these black things on my ears? Don't yawn either. Okay? Sorry. Get filleted real good. So, Mal goes, Mal goes in, he goes, so, I'm not very good at the face-to-face breakup. And I go, good. Like, somebody was with me on this. And Lauren was like, you're not? And he goes, no. And Lauren goes, what about the fadeaway? terrible at the fadeaway. Me too. Why do girls do that? What's not to get? I don't understand. Listen, because when I date you, it's because I like you. And so, if I don't get a call back from you, I'm not going to think, oh, she doesn't like me anymore. I'm going to think, something happened. I have to go help. She's in trouble. No, Mal, it just means they don't like you anymore. She's just not that into you. She's just not that into you. See, I think that it's that Or Mal said, you think that she's busy? Yeah, like maybe she got really busy. Yeah.

3:06:58Busy moving on to somebody else. You make that call eight months later and you're like, are we going to get together or what? So I haven't seen you in a while. Can I make dinner reservations or what? I was just saying the other day how much I miss my girlfriend. I haven't seen her in almost a year. We haven't talked in eight months and I just was telling my boys like, oh my gosh, I miss my girlfriend. Who's that other dude you're with on your Facebook? Is that my... Is it your brother? Yeah, you guys are like really close for a family. This is California, right? He said, I thought I saw you the other day nursing a baby at lunch. I know you've been really busy. Is that like a new job? Are you like a nurse now? Do they do that? Do you go to school to breastfeed? Where'd you learn how to breastfeed like that? That's so nice of you to do. I see you're practicing for us. That's really great. We should get together and talk about that. You're such a family person. I hate to fade away. I love it. Just call the guy and say, hey, man, it's not working out. Yeah. Because guys are like, guys don't pick up. Or for me, I'll speak for myself. I don't pick up on signs. I don't do the subtle. I don't pick up on subtle messages from girls at all. Some guys don't pick up on overt messages either. I read a statistic the other day that said something to the effect of 87% of men think that they're being flirted with when they're not.

3:08:26It's probably higher. I mean, it said 87%. It's probably something like 97%. Girls flirt with me all the time. The girl in the lobby, I was trying to find the studio because I don't know what to read. There's a plasma screen down there with all the addresses. And I looked to the left instead of the right. So I walked into a university and I was like, hey, so where's the radio station? And the girl was like, I don't. What? What are you talking about? Yeah. And then I felt embarrassed. But then she like, this is not a funny story. I thought she said hi to you. She looked at me. I thought she said hi to you and you were like, wow, she wants me bad. She wants it bad. She needs it. Because that's the deal. 87% of dudes, they think they're getting hit on when they're really not. Girls say hi to him and he'll be like, really? She's into it. You want me that bad. I have been working out. You're welcome. Yeah. By the way, Mal is going to be at his Gaslamp comedy show. It's tonight, isn't it? It is tonight, 7.30. Last Thursday of every month. That's right. And you got Dave Buda, Mike Vinn, Sean Palofsky. Palofsky. Palofsky. And Brian Scalero. Scalaro. Okay. Maybe you read the list. I know it. And Brian actually has got his own Comedy Central special. Yes. And is also...

3:09:54has been on Late Night with Conan. That's pretty cool. Very funny. He's a comedian from New York. Just a really, really funny guy. You moved, right? You moved? Oh, you're in L.A. Yeah, I was, like in June, I said, hey, San Diego, I'm leaving. I'm moving to L.A. I'm going to try to make this happen. Yeah. And I haven't been able to find a place in like two months. And so I've been couch surfing for the last two months, which is terrible. Have you ever done that? It's the worst. Couch surfing where you ask your friends, hey, can I stay over and not pay rent, but use everything in your house? Yeah. Is that okay? Can I call you at one o'clock in the morning? Because that's when I get home so you can open the door. Like, it's the worst thing ever. Like, it's so bad. Like, I've been couch surfing for like two months now. And I'm so sick of it. Like, I go out to bars now. to talk to girls and try to meet them, not to hook up, but just so they'll ask me to come home so I can sleep in a bed. So you've been couch surfing here or in L.A.? In San Diego. In San Diego. Because I don't feel comfortable. Some people couch surf with strangers. I can only ask friends until I'm really... Like your best friends, too. That's an awkward thing. Yeah, but they're cool with it. How long do you stay? You know, I'm...

3:11:17Until they kick you out. I don't know. I don't know what the etiquette is. This is the first time I've ever done this. It's the thing. Like, at what point do you go? When the person goes, well, it's been two months now. How do you do that? Well, I just hope to find a place every single day. You've been with the same friend the whole time? Mm-hmm. Oh, wow. He's a good guy. I would say every once in a while, just. Stock the fridge or come home with something nice, maybe some flowers. Yeah, there you go. My friend's a dude, so I'm not going to bring flowers home. These are for you. Beer, pick up takeout, and he'll be like, you can stay as long as you want. So set up a at-home date with my best guy friend. Yeah, pretty much. Make it right. So Mal Hall, comedian, extraordinaire. He had a couple of things that I wanted to ask him about. One of the things that I saw that instantly was funny to me was, you know, Woodsy's doing P90X, okay? That's intense, right? It's awful. Is it good, though? How many days have you been doing it? I want to do it. I did it for a week. Then I had to take a week off because I got eye surgery. And now I've been doing it for the last three days again. It's brutal. I popped in one of those DVDs that it just looks stupid crazy. Well, and all the guys that are in the studio, they're just ripped. I mean, cut and ripped. And you're like, I mean, yesterday I got.

3:12:38Pretty juicy. Got pretty juicy with it. It was buys and tries. Kid was doing chair dips. And I was like yelling. You yell when you do it because you're grunt. You can't do this workout quietly. You can't. My wife is upstairs going, I'm like, yeah, get it, girl. Have you guys seen the commercial for the shaker weight? Yes. Who hasn't? How great is that? Yeah. It's like you're doing hooray all the time. Who thought that was a good idea? I want to see them put that inside of a gym, like 24-hour fitness. As a bid. Let's see how many dudes use those. I picked one up when I went to get, because I had to get dumbbells for the P90X. So I went and grabbed, they had one out of the box, and here's me in the store with my shaker leg. Like that, and it doesn't do... It's not phallic at all, though. No, not at all. That's the good thing about it. It does nothing for you. My favorite commercial. Oh, yeah, it's all Ben's favorite commercial. And it's like an infomercial, so they're like...

3:13:46conventional weights are so clumsy and you can't use them and you see people, oh, I can just drop dumbbells. This is so, how did people ever work out? They're so slippery. It's true. You must shake this weight over your shoulder. I think it's, there are like some people that like, in like the, it's like a bunch of skinny people that hate fat people that are like, hey, what's the funniest thing we can have these fat people do? To stink that they're losing weight. How about the shake weight? And then shape-up shoes. What in the hell? Shape-ups. Shape-ups? What is that? You haven't seen those? It's the Skechers shoes that Joe Montana endorses. They look like platform tennis shoes. When I see people wearing those... You ever see someone that has one leg that's longer than the other one? Yeah. So they have to have one shoe that's got like four inches of padding on it? Yeah. The shape ups are just those shoes with four inches on each one, but they're rounded. So it works your calves and glutes, I guess, when you walk. As you just walk. Yeah. Wow. I haven't seen it. I'm finding a picture right now. Is it bad I wanted to get a pair? Yeah, it's terrible you wanted to get a pair. Shape ups are the new Crocs. Yeah. Jay, aren't they?

3:15:02Ridiculous? They're horrible. They make me like Weebles wobble. They look really weird. And it's like, I think their slogan is something like, work out while you walk. And how about you just walk? Or just work out. Stop eating and walk a little bit. Let me see. Oh, Sienna's got a picture. Oh, that's terrible. They're like raised. And they come in different styles. Now there's a comedian down at the comedy store that rolled in. And I was like, those shoes look weird. And I took a closer look. And they're like. stylish, dressy shape-ups that you could wear with khakis to a board meeting. You know, every comedian needs to have really, really awesome calves. That's the reason he had those. What about fourth meal? What is fourth meal? Fourth meal is the meal, like, we have an obesity problem in this country, which is why... I loved your fourth meal. Yeah, which is why, like, they're creating shape-ups. and shake weights. Shake weight sounds like a milkshake, by the way, that you can get at a fitness club or a fast food. Have a shake and wait. It does sound like that. But fourth meal is the meal that Taco Bell made up for fat people. It's like the late night meal between dinner and breakfast. It's a fourth meal. There's no meal between dinner and breakfast, Mikey. It's called sleep.

3:16:28Dream about stuff. It's true. Fourth meal. You know you're getting fat as a nation. When you stop naming your meals, just start numbering. Mike, you hungry? No, dude. I just had eighth meal. I'm good for right now. You know fifth meal's coming. Stop eating. Fifth meal's on the way. You had a Subway story, too. Dude. What happened? I saw the weirdest thing I've ever seen in my life at Subway. First of all, people... I'm just an observant person. So don't get mad at me because I saw this. I didn't create this person. I went to Subway the other day and the sandwich artist. That's what they're called. You should be laughing in your car if you're not a Subway worker. Sandwich artist making my sandwich had six fingers on each hand. Are you for real? Yeah. Wow. He had 12 fingers. She had 12 fingers. She had 12 fingers. She looked like the dude from Princess Bride. Yeah. Yeah. Like, her hand wasn't deformed looking. It was just like, wow, there's something extra happening there. Right. And, like, I noticed because she had two fingers and one hole of those super loose gloves, which are never...

3:17:37Yeah. Like, her gloves were tight. And I was like, what is happening here? Right. And she had two fingers in one hole. And I was like, that's weird. Yeah. And, like, I've just been thinking about this girl nonstop. And I feel bad because she didn't know I was a comedian. I was going to notice that. Right. It's an observation. And then go on the radio and potentially tell millions of people about her problem. But I feel terrible because she works at Subway. Right. And she can't do the song and dance. Isn't that terrible? What's the song and dance? Five. Five dollars a foot long. Floppy had six fingers on each hand. Oh, my God. That may be the craziest. We've all got the five. Five dollars. Five dollars that long. Wouldn't it be uncomfortable if she was in the commercial? She was a very nice girl, but that would be uncomfortable if she was in the commercial. And they are real subway people that they get to do those commercials. Maybe she uses a foot. Yeah. But what if she's got an extra little piggy, too? Yeah.

3:18:39I kind of wanted to ask her, hey, do you want to go to the beach? Let's wear flip-flops. Is that bad? Yes. Why? I think that would be bad. So that you can see if she has this big show. I'm half Asian. I'm just doing research on this person. I want to figure it out. Mal, part of Mal's deal, as long as I've known Mal, Mal's deal has been his observational. Driving stuff. You've always had driving stuff. Yeah. In fact. Ever since talking to you, I will notice stuff driving that I never noticed before. Like he is the guy that I think told me about sprinklers. Yeah. Like Southern California, we don't do rain like we can't drive in the rain. But I figured out that we just can't drive. with water shooting at our car at all? Like, if you drive on the 163, you know that there's a sprinkler that always shoots onto the road and causes a traffic jam because people think it's raining. Like, everyone drives like Asians from, like, Washington. He's Asian. He can say it. He can say it. But the other day, like, what do the senior citizen volunteer police officers do? Yeah. Does anyone know? I think they...

3:19:51Yeah, what do they do? Just drive around? Paperwork, maybe? Yeah, paperwork. Why are they in cars? Why are they in cars driving? What are they doing? What are they? I think they just drive around. Can they pull you over? I saw someone getting pulled over by the senior citizen volunteer police officer. Like, what do you have to do to get pulled over by these old, like, police officers? Like, they don't... Here's why I want to know. They don't have a shotgun in the car. Like I drove by this guy that was getting pulled. They don't have a shotgun. They have an oxygen tank in the middle of the car in case they see someone driving really fast and they need a breath of air. That's it. That's it. That's it. They're so old. I love it. Tonight, by the way, Mal's doing a show, 730 Gaslamp Comedy Show. And it's tonight with Dave Buda, Mal. Mike Vinn, I'm going to get this right, Sean Palofsky. Look at you, Mikey. There you go. And Brian Scolaro. Brian Scolaro. Sean is a chick, by the way. Sean's a chick? Yeah, she's very funny. Chelsea Lately, does she write for Chelsea Lately? Has she been on the show? She's been on the show, Roundtable. It's at the Tipsy Crow, and it's tonight at 770 Fifth Avenue in the Gaslamp, Tipsy Crow.

3:21:13And do you do anything special for M1s? I want to give, can I give away a pair of tickets? Yeah, yeah, let's do it. For the show? Yeah. Give away a pair of tickets. We're only doing one show now. So you got to get there. The show starts at 730. And like, I'm half Asian. This is not like a black show where you can show up an hour later. No, I'm right on time. This show runs on time, so the show's going to start at 7.30, get there by 7, and you'll have a great time. It's the best comedy show in San Diego. The best. Let's give away a pair right now, and it's cool because it's like that New York-style comedy club. In the basement. It's here. Let's give away tickets, a pair of tickets to the first single female that wants to come to the show and not give me the fadeaway. There you go. 570-1949 and Mal. Always a pleasure, dude. Thank you for coming in. It's good to see you, man. I miss this. It's good to see you. Let's do this again. We will. We'll be back. Oh, my God. It's better than I thought.

3:22:26Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. You don't want to miss your chance to hit the surf and have sand stuck in your butt all day. That's how we say hello at the FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. The party at the beach is coming August 29th at the Oceanside Pier Amphitheater. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion supported by Miller Lite and Sion, Edward Sharp, and the Magnetic Zeros, Rogue Wig, and the Delta Spirit. Cast by local 94.9 stage. The silent comedy. The nervous records of burning of Rome and white apple tree. Get your tickets for 30 bucks today. No service fees or extra charges. Get them online at FM949SD.com or IndependenceJam.com. Eight vans at the beach. Get tickets and join the party. August 29th in Oceanside. The FM949 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Wahoo's Fish Tacos. Okay, let me guess. I'd like to turn myself in, officer. You can't turn yourself in on the side of the road, sir. But I got...

3:23:30Got this Mini Cooper with three years or 36,000 miles of no-cost maintenance and six airbags, and I only paid $19,500. That's not a crime, sir. But it also came with 37 MPG, which I just withheld from you. Congratulations. I've made a mockery. Okay, move it along. The Mini Cooper. It's a steal, but it's not stolen. Get 1.9% APR financing for up to 60 months on all new Mini models from now until August 31st. For details, visit miniusa.com slash info. MSRP includes destination handling, excludes license registration, taxes, and options. Listen up, San Diego. Prospect Bar and Grill brings you Prospect Live. San Diego's Thursday night spot for live music. Thursday, July 29th. Prospect Live features the Earthlings along with Habitat's pre-CD release party. Electric House and DJ Chuck Prada in the mix. $3 Dos Equis and $5 You Call It's All Night. The Earthlings and Habitat this Thursday night at Prospect Bar and Grill. Located at 1025 Prospect Street. Upstairs next to Sushi on the Rock. For more info, go to prospectbar.com. This is a Barfly Promotions event. Out on the dance floor, sipping on the draft beer. I tripped on the dance floor, but I did not spill my draft beer. Because I'm sipping on the MGD. I get that fresh tap taste in a bottle, sipping on the MGD.

3:24:49We love draft beer because it's beer in its purest, most ideal state. Miller Genuine Draft is always cold filtered, never heat pasteurized, to lock in that fresh from the tap taste every time. Genuine Draft, fresh from the tap taste every time. Miller Brewing Company. Just when you thought your eyes had been dialed into everything, along comes a reason for an optic overhaul. Introducing the next generation of D.O.S., the all-new Droid X. Forget in-home theater. This does in-phone theater. This does movies, videos, even live mobile TV on a 4.3-inch screen so big, your eyes will be glued to each and every square inch of real estate. This does HD video capture, even mobile hotspots powerful enough to fuel multiple devices at will, so you can launch the Internet where you want, when you want.

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3:27:08This is our best radio offer ever. Get your risk-free 60-day trial of new proactive plus two free extras. Show acne who's boss. Be proactive. Call 1-800-277-1134. That's 1-800-277-1134. Tomorrow, the funniest movie of the summer has it all. Penguins. Trippers. Pudding. Sex. We're going to be one hell of a party. Critics declare dinner for schmucks is schmucking funny. Where are you from? We are from Switzerland. I love your cheese. Hit the holes. And Rolling Stone Raves. Steve Carell is a comic wonder. I have laid eggs inside of your brain. Get them out of my head. Dinner for schmucks. I want to lick cheese off my naked body. Oh, I'm sure Tim has a place. Rated PG-13 may be inappropriate for children under 13. Starts tomorrow. Hey, Padres fans, it's time to believe. Your Padres are battling it out for first place, and you don't want to miss any action. Petco Park is the place to be this week with a lot of great games and great giveaways. Get to the park as your Padres face off against their NL West rivals, the Los Angeles Dodgers. Tuesday, July 27th through Thursday, July 29th. If you get your tickets now online at Padres.com, you can save $5 on each ticket. Don't wait. Come cheer on your Padres as they look to beat L.A. July 27th through 29th. It's big. Big on performance. Big on fuel efficiency. Big on safety. Big on fun. Big on the kind of unique good looks Saturn has.

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3:30:02How dare you. They do that. Woodsy just said, we just played that clip of Jay going, I can make a hundred hush puppies in an hour. And Sienna goes, what are hush puppies? And Woods goes, oh, they're great. And I go, are they? They are. They are great. They sound good. I said, I feel about hush puppies like I feel about biscuits. It's one of those things that people are like, oh, my God, biscuits. They're so good. They're so good. And I'm like, for me, it's like putting chalk in my mouth. I'm always like, and dust flying. Sorry it's not Minuto, pal. You're eating the wrong kind of biscuit, then. That's what Wood said. Biscuits with honey and butter. Butter just dripped on it. Maybe some gravy smattered on it. Biscuits and gravy, sir. Never understood it. And he said, and Woods goes, hey, Mikey, but you know what? They do make hush puppies with jalapenos. He was dead serious. He was dead serious. They're delicious. That's funny. Independence Jam.

3:31:21Coastal Invasion 2010 presented by Miller Lite and Scion. Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros, Rogue Wave, The Wigs, Delta Spirit. It's going to be $30 August 29th at Oceanside Pier. That's my parents' anniversary. Maybe my dad takes my mom for their 53rd wedding anniversary. Maybe my dad takes my mom to Independence Town. Your dad's a huge... Edward Sharpe. Well, not only that, but they go to bed about four hours later than I do. Exactly. They're partiers. Yeah, they're partiers. Your dad and I were talking about Rogue Wave this last weekend. Yeah. He's into it. He likes their earlier stuff. He's not so much in on the new around. I don't like the later stuff. He likes the old records. He's way into it. But anyway, it's going to be good. And it is available for you to pick up right now. 30 bucks. Do it. Oceanside Pier. You guys ready to do a little gender pyramid? Yeah. Let's do gender pyramid the way that gender pyramid works is guys are answering girl stuff and girls are answering guy stuff. It's not easy. But if you feel like you're a guy that knows your girl stuff and a girl that knows your guy stuff, call us right now, 570-1949. And Woodsy will be playing with the dudes and Sienna will be playing with the girls.

3:32:41Let's see how well you do. What do we have up for grabs, Jay? I have tickets to see Spoon on Friday, October 1st at SOMA. Nice. There you go. 570-1949. Give us a call right now if you want to go see Spoon at SOMA. In a little bit, we are going to be discussing who you think is the hottest woman of all time. Kind of talked about it a little bit the other day, but didn't go into detail. So today we will pose the question. What are you thinking about it right now? We're not talking about who is the hottest woman now. We're talking about who is the hottest woman of all time. You're number one. Of all time? Of all time. Probably. You know your wife's sitting in the studio. I always have a hard time thinking of her name. Rebecca Esparza.

3:33:42No, because my wife will tell you who she thinks the hottest dude is. Yeah, in a heartbeat. Matthew McConaughey. I thought it was Matthew McConaughey. Thank you, darling. I appreciate it. She's wavering. Who? Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt. I think, and that's the thing. See, here's what I said, and I will pose it this way right now. I'll say, it isn't who is the hottest girl of all time, because I do believe that that is impossible to answer. So the way that I'll phrase it is, Who's in the conversation of the hottest girl of all time? Who's in the conversation? And Scarlett Johansson is in the conversation for who is the hottest girl of all time. I can't believe that. Oh, yeah. She's not what she used to be. Mamacita. I don't want to think about what she's like, you know, on July 29th of 2010. I want to think about what I think of Scarlett Johansson. She's lost the curse. You know who else is in it for me? Who? Heather Graham.

3:34:38Really? She's in the conversation. Oh, yeah. You guys are weird. I know. You ever see Boogie Nights? Yeah, I've seen it. Roller Girl? Roller Girl. Oh, boy. I think Natalie Portman. Yeah. She's in the conversation. Nerd. Wait, wait, wait. You know what I'll say about Natalie? She's gorgeous. That's the deal. With Natalie Portman, she's in the... There's two separate camps. There's the hot camp and the beautiful camp. Right. She's in the same camp as Audrey Hepburn is in, which is beautiful. Well, thank you, Daya. I appreciate it. Yes, that's right. 570-1949. M1 Chris from Oceanside. Hi, Chris. Yo, what's up? Chris, you are going to be playing with Woodsy, and your competition is going to be M1 Genelyn from San Diego. Are you there, Genelyn? Hello. Hi, Genelyn? Hi. That is correct, right? It's Genelyn? Yes. Okay. I'm going to put M1 Chris on hold, so hang on, Chris. Okay, gentlemen, we got this. That's right. Ladies are always first. And so you are going to be working with Sienna. Sienna will be trying to impart to you girl stuff. No, guy stuff. Yeah, sorry, guy stuff. Now, I'm going to be looking to L.O.B. because L.O.B. is like the judge. I am the judge. She will decide whether or not you've gotten it right or not, gentlemen. Are you ready? Okay. All right. Are you ready, Sienna?

3:36:04Yes, I need gentlemen to be confident, though, and say, yes, I'm ready. We're going to get this. Yeah, Sienna had a look on her face like, there you go. There you go. That's what I need to hear. All right, you have 60 seconds. We begin now. Okay, Newcastle, Pacifico, Sierra Nevada. What? Wait. Sierra Nevada. I think she said it. Did you say it? What did you say? Sierra? Yes. Okay. Turtle, Ari, Drama, E, Vince, Vince. Lloyd. Boobies? No. Turtle. Ari. Okay, skip. Floyd Mayweather. Oscar De La Hoya. Boxer. Yep. Okay. Cups. Jock straps. Gloves. Ball. Underwear. No. Ball. Bat. Helmet. Protection. Gear. For what? For football? You got it. Okay. Skiing, snowboarding, hiking, rock climbing. Extreme sports? That sounds extreme. No, where do they do it? Hiking. You're out of time. You're out of time. 60 seconds. How many did they get? They got three. They got three of them.

3:37:29Yeah, Woodsy's calling one of them into question. Hang on the line, gentlemen, okay? Good job, gentlemen. M1 Chris from Oceanside. You there? Yes, sir. All right, you're going to be working with Woodsy. You got a mind meld with Woodsy. Mind melding. We're mind melding. You got your game face on, Woodsy? You know that, dude. All right. You got 60 seconds. Begin. The Bachelor. The real world. Reality TV. Yes. Hershey's. Girardelli. Godiva. Yes. Joy Behar. Whoopi Goldberg. Yes. A choker. A locket. A chain. Yes. Almost Famous. You, Me, and Dupree. The Other. Bride Wars. How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. The Other. Almost famous. What is her name? Not Reese Witherspoon. It is Kate Hudson. Yep. Burt's Beeswax. Blistex. Carmex. Yep. Wow. Wow. Finally. Holy cow. Man. Dude. Good job. You did incredible. The guys have finally taken one. That's the first time ever. I think so, man. I think the guys have taken one yet.

3:39:00Congratulations, Chris. Hang on the line. Thank you. You just got yourself a pair of tickets to Spoon. Sorry, gentlemen. This is a nice try. A valiant try. I liked her boyfriend in the background. Extreme sports. I know. Loved him. Our phone number is 570-1949. If you want to text us, you can do so by texting 949mikey at gmail.com. Sienna has... This food that they're selling in Manhattan that goes for a very exorbitant rate. You're going to want this, Mike. Am I? You are. What is it? It's a $69 hot dog. Holy cow. Yeah, I'm in. You want to hear about this? How, how, how? It's 12 inches of beef perfection is what they're saying. It's not even like stuck or anything. It's beef. I wouldn't want a duck hot dog. I don't know. It's expensive meat. It's like a goat hot dog. Gross. This next thing I'm going to say, it's going to have you, Mike. 12-inch beef hot dog. Grilled in white truffle oil. Oh, done. He's sold. Sounds pretty good. The guy would bathe in truffle oil. And he might, actually. I might have a biscuit and hush puppies if it had truffle oil on it. He has bathed in truffle oil. And it's placed in a toasted pretzel bun that is toasted with white truffle butter. Sounds good. Amazing. And then it's topped with medallion.

3:40:25Of duck foie gras? Foie gras. That's disgusting. With black truffles. Repugnant. Too much truffle. Yeah, too much truffle. Truffle on out of here. It looks hideous. It looks good. Maybe throw a little mustard in there. Maybe some diced onions, some relish. If it's going for $69, that thing's good. And you walk in the park, imagine if a piece of foie gras or whatever falls off. You're like, ah, that's $23. That's gross. Nasty thing. It's gross. You don't eat foie gras on a pot dog. You saw a picture on my computer, and you didn't know what the story was, and you said, oh, that hot dog looks amazing. Yeah, but that's before I knew it. It's got foie gras. Isn't that duck liver? I said yesterday it was the worst thing I've ever eaten. Goose liver. Yeah, repugnant. I'll tell you this. I'll tell you this. If Jeff started making a hot dog down at Pamplemousse, I'd be all in. Oh, yeah. He takes regular stuff and makes it into masterpiece. He takes fries and makes them great. Fries are already great. He makes us truffle fries. Delicious. He takes a hamburger. What'd you think of that? Oh, my gosh. The Kobe beef burger. How gnarly is that? Amazing. It was great. What did Pizza Hut do? They had to pay millions of dollars in a lawsuit. Tell you next.

3:41:52You're listening to The Mikey Show. The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Everybody likes to see a clean car or truck, but it's the oil you can't see that benefits most from being clean. Changing your oil and filter before they get dirty helps keep your vehicle running right. For most models, that's every three months or 3,000 miles. Changing the oil is the single most important thing you can do for your vehicle. Keep it clean with the top-name brands at low prices from the helpful professional parts people at the Cregan O'Reilly Auto Parts store near you. Drop by Cregan O'Reilly Auto Parts today for Chevron Supreme or Formula Shell conventional motor oil on sale for $199 a quart. Protect your engine from excess heat, dirt, and contaminants with Chevron Supreme or Formula Shell conventional motor oil, $199 a quart, only at Cregan O'Reilly. Riley Auto Parts, the official auto parts store of NASCAR. Better parts, better prices every day. Limit supply, see store for details.

3:43:00Brides and Grooms, San Diego's biggest and best bridal show is coming to the San Diego Convention Center Sunday, August 8th. It's the Bridal Bazaar. I love it. There's so many choices and I love to have lots of choices. I mean, I kind of have an idea of what I want, but there's so many choices here. It's really awesome. I like what I'm seeing here. There's a lot of variety and kind of where I'm getting a lot of ideas. It's so much easier to have everything in one spot and to be able to see what you actually like. At the Bridal Bazaar, you'll find everything you need to plan the wedding of your dreams all in one place, all on one day. Just so many vendors to choose from, from everything from flowers to invitations. Cakes, definitely. I'm full from all the tastings. The dresses were gorgeous. Chocolate fountains and everything that you could possibly imagine. It's kind of a collaboration of ideas that's coming together. It's got to be a perfect day. Plus, you can register to win a pair of diamond earrings from John Franklin Jewelers. The Bridal Bazaar. Sunday, August 8th at the San Diego Convention Center. Tickets and discount coupons at bridalbazaar.com. Definitely go to the Bridal Bazaar because it's... It's all you need. Limited term financing with above average credit through BMW Financial Services offer expires close of business at month's end. Now you can get even better sales and service than before. We have a friendly and knowledgeable sales and service staff who are familiar with the full line of BMW vehicles. Now you can get special APR financing on select BMW models. Plus, choose from over 200 new and certified pre-owned BMWs ready for immediate delivery.

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3:45:38I'll call you most interesting man in the world. Don't always drink beer. But when I do, for Dos Equis. Enjoy Dos Equis responsibly. Imported by Cervezas Mexicanas, White Plains, New York. Stay thirsty, my friends. If you're struggling in any way to pay your mortgage, the federal government has just designated $75 billion for loan modifications. As an American taxpayer, you were entitled to this relief money. But don't wait. This federal money will go quickly. So act now. Some companies charge $3,000, $4,000, even $5,000 for a loan modification that you don't have to pay. Call the VS Modification Center at 888-384-3022. We'll show you how to work directly with your lenders to get your loan modification completed and save you thousands of dollars. Just call 888-384-3022 for a free no-obligation assessment. You will receive a printout stating your eligibility, complete with your proposed payment and details of your new rate and term.

3:46:42Don't risk your biggest asset. If you foresee any financial difficulties ahead, or if you are already facing default, call the VS Modification Center at 888-384-3022 today. That's 888-384-3022. Fridays, the official kickoff to the weekend and the coolest concert series around. Four o'clock Fridays, presented by Jack Daniels at the Del Mar Racetrack, are back with free concerts all season long. This Friday, rock steady into the cool, funky beats of Common Sense. Common Sense, live at the Del Mar Racetrack, this Friday, July 30th. Free with racetrack admission or $20 after the last race. Del Mar, cool as ever. Stop by the Home Depot today and you'll find that every appliance of $398 or more is 10% off. And with free haul away and delivery, things can really get cooking. Or chilling. Or washing, drying, freezing, baking, or whatever you need from great brands like GE, Maytag, and LG. All with 10% off and free haul away and delivery. More saving. More doing. That's the power of the Home Depot. Valley through August 4th. U.S. only. See store for details.

3:47:55This is Joe. This is Andy. This is Tony. And we are the Gaglione Brothers. I'm excited to say the new Gaglione Brothers shop is finally open. Friars Road and Mission Gorge, next to San Diego Brewing Company, across from Kaiser. Kaiser? No, we use Amoroso. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I make up lyrics if I don't know them. Lauren. One of the reasons I don't like paper plates. Wasteful. Woods. I'm a butt grabber. I'm a boob grabber. Zienna. Why keep the antibacterial hand gel in my purse at all times? And Jay. There's no doubt in my mind, there is only one soulmate for everyone. On FM 94.9. I was a fan of almost all the metal bands, but Motley Crue, I never did. Makes no sense to me. I know, because you loved them. I loved me some Crue, dude. You know who else I was not a fan of, and I don't think you were either. Never got. Never got. Steelheart. Twisted Sister. No, never a big fan. Dude. Ridiculous. Oh, man. I remember when I was in high school, there were the Twisted Sister dudes and there were the not Twisted Sister dudes. The Van Halen guys. I was a Van Halen guy. Me too. Tonight's 8 o'clock album, Nico Case, Blacklisted. Oh, that's a good album. What did Pizza Hut do that they got in trouble and somebody sued them and they had to pay millions of dollars? It was one of their delivery drivers actually got in an accident with two women, a mother, a woman and her mother.

3:49:28And yesterday, the San Diego Superior Court jury granted them millions of dollars because of the crash. Really? Yeah. The youngest woman was 62 years old. And this happened on Claremont Drive back in November of 2008. Car accident occurred. And I guess the driver who was 18 of the Pizza Hut vehicle, she. I don't know like what exactly she suffered from blackout spells occasionally. And Pizza Hut didn't look into that. And I guess that happened while she was driving. And so she crashed into this other car with two women. That scares me so bad that they could be out on the road. Oh, yeah, there are. Isn't that scary? People that have blackouts can be driving. And some people, I mean, some people, they don't even know that that can happen to them. It just, you know, there always has to be a first time. Sure. But, you know, the lawsuit says Pizza Hut should have looked into that. More if they're going to be having these drivers on the road. And the women that got hit, one of them suffered permanent brain damage, no longer take care of herself. Yeah. The other woman was 87 in the car, broke her neck and had other injuries. Bad stuff. I'm surprised that with pizza delivery places that they still do company car and that it's not on you.

3:50:34It's completely you if you're a delivery driver. It doesn't have anything to do with us. You sign something away that says you don't have anything to do with us when you deliver pizza. You're practically like a private contractor. They may. But the thing is, is that they still have to hire this girl. And they didn't look into when they hired her, her history. My brother was almost killed by a company driver in a company car. Yeah. T-boat him, totaled the car. My brother, the cop said they've never seen anyone walk away from an accident like that. Yeah. You sue? No. No? Should have. Should have. I know. We got enough money. No. We're going to do that. For what though? I just, yeah, it was a mistake, you know, and we're not about to do that. Hey, me, pal. One of the women got $8.6 million and the other one got $2.2 million. Holy cow. It's like, what amount is enough for what they went through, you know? Yeah, I mean, that's, yeah. So here's the question. Who is in the conversation of the hottest woman of all time? Not who is, because that's impossible to answer. But who's in the conversation? I think that makes it more interesting. 5701949. Phoebe Cates. Phoebe Cates, I think that would be your conversation. Not yours. That's Fast Times Ridgemont High, girl. Oh, my gosh. Just what I know her as. Like, Pamela Anderson count. No way. Absolutely. 100%. Because some people, they think she's the perfect woman. Dude, yes, she counts. She was smoking hot back in the day. Smoking.

3:51:59Yeah, she would not be in my conversation. Nicole Eggert back in the day, smoking hot. Yeah. Oh, from Charles and George? Yeah, not so much anymore. Now it looks like Nicole Eggert ate Nicole Eggert. That's mean, but... You're so mean. I was never into Pam Anderson because I always thought that her eyes looked puffy. Oh, really? I did. Oh, man. She never saw that video. When she was on Baywatch, all those girls on Baywatch, oh my gosh, they looked good. I always thought that women thought that they were hotter than guys. I always thought it looked uncomfortable. Everything all squeezed. You probably like the short brown haired girl on Baywatch. I don't know. Nobody likes. Andrea on 902. You're a weirdo. You're a weirdo. I liked Jesse Spano on Saved by the Bell. She's cute. Well, you liked her after when she was in the movie. When she did striptease. Yes, you're right. Kelly Kapowski. Kelly Kapowski. You liked Kelly Kapowski. And one's Zach from Chula Vista. Who's in the conversation? Are you there, Zach? Yeah. Who's in the conversation? Catherine Zeta-Jones. I was going to say her. Gorgeous. No, Mikey's out on that, too. What? Yeah, she's no Allison Hannigan, bro.

3:53:14She's no Allison Hannigan, but she's pretty delicious in the conversation. You're going to put Allison Hannigan in the conversation and not Catherine Zeta-Jones? Not only in the conversation, I would take my mouse and I would drag her up further to the top. You'd be having a conversation by yourself then. If you're listening right now and you're like, Allison Hannigan, that sounds familiar. Yeah, it is the girl that says that one time at band camp. Yeah, flute girl. Yeah, she's not cute there, but why don't you Google image Allison Hannigan? Yeah, she's cute. Cute. She's a cute girl. I'm going to prove myself. There's hate. Hottest woman of all time conversation? She is not. No. I'm sorry. No, she's not. But she is really, really pretty. There's dudes I'd make out with before I'd make out with everyone. I'll tell you that right now. Wow. I can't believe I'm holding to that. Oh, my gosh. Allison Hanna. Yeah, she's cute. What? She's not gross. Really? Seven. She walks in. She's a six. Seven, six. She walks in. She's a six. I go, hey, look at that six. She walks in with our general manager, Rick, and they go, hey, guys, I'd like you to meet our new sales girl, Allison. And she walks out. You go.

3:54:21Oh my gosh, that's a dime. No, I guess she's a six. Really? We live in San Diego. I've seen some of the people you've said that about. You would say she's a dime. Yeah, I would not. I promise. Like who, for instance? Kathy Callout? Just random people. Megan Fox. Megan Fox is gorgeous. She's a dime. She's in the conversation. We are now getting phone calls of who's in the conversation. M1 Marla, who's in the conversation? Hi. Hi. Hi, we were just talking in our office, and I work with a young kid, and he thinks that Heidi Klum should be in the office. Yeah. Absolutely. Gorgeous. Gorgeous. Can't picture her. Oh, man. Oh, I have... She's my screensaver, so hang on. I have Victoria's Secret model, Adriana Lima. Oh, yes. Oh, wow. Mamacita. She's, like, perfect. Giselle, but then the voice. Then she speaks. Okay, but just take that out of it. Okay, then, yeah.

3:55:20Here's a little angel for you. We're all ferociously Googling. Heidi Klum. Oh, man. She's really pretty. However, I do want to note that she does have some masculine features. Oh, man. She kind of looks like Riggins from Friday Night Lights. What is your problem? Sorry, she looks a bit like Riggins. That's Adriana Lima? Oh, mama. Look at the fun bags on that horse helmet. I'm holding up a picture of Adriana Lima, Victoria's Secret model. Perfection. Elle McPherson, back in the day. Oh, yeah. These are girls that need to be in the conversation of hottest woman of all time. M1 Justin from Temecula. Yes, sir. Who do you think? I like L.O.B. Wait, who is that? That's M1 Justin. Hey, are you black? I'm not of the black accent, but no. Yeah, well, then you're out. Oh, he's not out. No, he's not out. He's out. He's mostly out. He's mostly out. That made me blush, but. Thank you. What about Alyssa Milano? Oh, yes. Definitely. A hundred percent. Honey, who do you think is in the conversation? My wife is in the studio. Who do you think is in the conversation? The hottest woman of all time. All time. Grace Kelly. Oh, boo. Boo. Thank you, dude. Rebecca just looked at Woods to be like, you're going to argue with me? For real. Somebody that we would know from. Rebecca just deflated.

3:56:49She's like, I'm so confident in her answer too. I think Marilyn Monroe, but you guys all shot me down the other day. Grace Kelly is, oh my gosh. First of all, it's taking an hour to download this picture because it's from 1932. Hello, Dan. Thank you very much. I really appreciate it. I think she goes on the beautiful side. She is gorgeous. She's on the beautiful side, not hot. But what about Marilyn Monroe? Hot. You guys were like, no. Hot, I do. What? Oh, I think she's gorgeous. I think so too. Gorgeous. So curvy and busty and breathy. Breath everywhere. Babe, do you have anybody that you think's in the conversation that's born after 1825? Nope. No. Audrey Hepburn. Yes. Faye Ray. She was in the first Kong. Faye Ray from the first Kong. Oh, wow. What about Farrah Fawcett? Oh, yeah. Back in the day. Farrah. Heather Locklear. Heather Locklear. Heather Locklear. Yeah.

3:57:51Heather Locklear was smoking hot. And you said no on Christy Brinkley. Yeah, that makes sense. No way. Kathy Ireland. Ooh, Kathy Ireland. Heather Locklear, I think, might be in the... She had that elegant look. See, and there's a difference. No? She had that dirty... Watch your mouth, young man. See, Woods' wife kind of reminds me of a cross between Heather Locklear and Michelle Pfeiffer. So I could see how. But your wife, I think, has more of an elegant than a hot. Well, you're not going to say that on the air. I just said, I think there's someone like Audrey Hepburn has more of an elegance than a hot. I think my wife is hot. She is hot. She's a hot mama. All three of you guys have hot wives. Yeah, we do. Oh, yeah. We're real lucky. Way over our heads. Jay! Hillary. Hillary, who's in the conversation for hottest woman of all time? Yeah, I want to bring some men. I want to talk about hottest men. Yeah, maybe not. Maybe get it. You have to have a woman. Bradley Cooper. You know who? And unfortunately, she's just not anymore. But back in like the...

3:59:0280s, late 80s, early 90s. Betsy Ross. No, Carrie Otis. Mae West. Oh, come on. Betsy who? Carrie Otis. Oh, yeah. Mickey Rourke's wife. She was sexy. Smoking. Sherilyn Finn from back in the day. Remember her? What about the new, what's her name? She dates the tennis player, Brooklyn something or other. Oh, Brooklyn Decker. Yeah, we were looking at pictures of her and I was like, I might be gay. Yeah. Eventually, you guys are going to name someone I know. Honestly, I haven't known the last five years. Carrie Otis? Yeah. Do you remember Carrie Otis? But from back in the day. She was in some dirty Mickey Rourke movies. They were married. Oh, yeah. I had a poster of her, a Calvin Klein poster of her, like, black and white. She's riding a Harley. Yes. LRB's like, you might be gay. You never know. Marisa Miller. And she was so, and it still actually is hanging in my mom's house. Oh, my gosh. Maybe you bring that in. She was so hot. Carrie Otis. M1 Leonidas from San Diego. Who do you think should be in the conversation? Besides my elegant wife, I have to say Kate Beckinsale. Yeah. She's beautiful to me, though. Not hot. She's like that gorgeous, elegant. She's gorgeous, though. Kate Beckinsale. She's like who you want to bring home to mom. Yeah, 100%. Was it?

4:00:23Was it rude that I, if I put somebody in the elegant category, I almost feel bad. No, no. It's a different type. One is like, ooh, and one is like, you're pretty. Yeah. M1 Scott from San Diego. Hey, you got to go old school for Ann Margaret. Oh, yeah. That's true. That's true. Selma Hayek. There is no how. God, really? Yeah. I think J-Lo is pretty hot. You know, Desperado Selma Hayek. Oh, my God. Yeah, I left her unibrow in that one. Rita Kahlo. You know who else everybody says that I think is repugnant? I know who you're going to say. Penelope Cruz. Yeah, I look at Penelope Cruz. I'm like, yeah. You're crazy. Seriously, man. Oh, yeah. What? She's pretty. Yeah. She looks like she belongs in a mousetrap. How about Jessica Alba? Oh, yeah. Jessica Alba. Sofia Vergara? How do you say her last name? She's on Modern Family. Oh, she's beautiful. She's so pretty. She is amazing. Every woman. Halle Berry. Halle Berry. Every single living woman resembles a mouse, clown, or bird. Bird, mouse, clown. Bird, mouse, clown. BMC. Yeah, BMC. Every woman, every woman resembles a bird, a mouse, or a clown. What's Hillary? We should, now.

4:01:38What we got to do, we have to answer separately. I know what you're going to say. It's not bad. It's not bad. What if Hillary doesn't want to be a clown? Hillary, Lauren's a bird. I'm a clown. Rebecca's a mouse. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought I was a clown. What was Jamie again? Clown? Clown. Can we all write it down separately? Yeah. Jay, come in. Let me see if he's better. Let's see if we match. You're going to categorize my looks? I'm a clown. Look at me over here. I got it. Easy. Every woman on Earth apparently looks like one of these. Now, don't feel bad because even... What about men? Every man on Earth. I've tried. It doesn't work. You can't do it. It's not bad. It's not bad. Turtle, lion, or orangutan. I don't know. Do you understand that there are... There are every model is either a bird, mouse, or clown. Every beautiful woman that we've named is either a bird, mouse, or clown. This is L.O.B.'s game, by the way. No, this is not. This is my brother's game. You're reading into animals or clowns? No, I'm telling you. It's not bad. You're reading too much into it. You are. You're reading too much into it. You're overthinking it, Hillary. It's my brother's fault. It's her brother's fault. Ready? Where's Jay? Go, Jay. I'm ready. What does it say? I can't see. Mouse? You say mouse? Yeah.

4:02:42What do you say? I said bird. I said bird. I thought bird. Guys, Hillary doesn't want to play. That was the first one that they've not agreed on. I'm telling you. Way to go, Jay. I was torn. I was torn. I was torn between those two. He didn't have a good look either. Hillary, I'm a bird. Get in here and let me have a good look at you. A beautiful bird. My wife is a mouse. I know. The whole conversation is offensive. Oh, come on. It is. And you have someone staring at you, which is always awkward. At least you're not a clown. I know it. A clown? Did you hear that? 570-1949. We got to go. The lovely and talented Hillary is up next. Hill, what do you got today? It looks like a mouse, right? A bird. Hey, Hillary, play some modest mouse, baby. Majority bird. Come on. Play some modest mouse. I'm telling you, it isn't bad. Great, now she hates us. Go ahead. What do you have today, Hill? You gorgeous bird. Gorgeous angel. Goodness. What did I grab? I grabbed the pixies and the dead weather and free energy.

4:03:46Rogue Wave. Oh, no. She's upset. She's all bummed. I told her she didn't want to play. I'll bring her some cookies tomorrow. She'll be all right. I know. We will come back tomorrow morning at 6 o'clock. Do it all over again. The Mikey Show is out. Late. A Lincoln Financial radio station. Mikey in the morning. About the music all day and night. FM 94.9. It's about the music.