The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 08/04/10
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Wednesday August 4, 2010
A revved up LOB slams an ice cream sandwich for breakfast and washes it down with a five-hour energy drink. The three amigos; Woods, Lauren, and Jay get ready for their trip to New Orleans. Woodsy let a fart fly in the elevator, livin’ it up while goin’ down! President Obama gets the birthday falsetto treatment while sitting on his oval throne. Sienna reports on a crazy Chinese bus that has a tunnel through the middle of it so cars can drive through underneath. What I want to know is what happens if the bus driver decides to change lanes while you’re driving under it? Attention La Jolla hairstylists: don’t mess with how Sienna wants her hair done! Captain Buzzkill calls in sounding extremely buzzed. WoS gives a good Fantasy Football tip on a rookie defensive player. The panel delves into Craigslist prostitution and this leads to a separate topic about the safety of using the popular site. Mikey is creeped out by Craigslist but Jay’s not paranoid at all about selling things right from his house to Craigslist patrons. Slim Shady is scared of what? Mikey tells about the squirmy content on the hospital waiting room TV he had to endure with his mom sitting next to him. This leads to the gang describing their embarrassing moments with their parents and movies. The big news of the day is revealed: The Kid went into Henry’s with Mikey (weird) and decided it was ok to sample all the bin food. This becomes a laugh riot about whether or not it’s cool to treat yourself to a five-fingered discount every now and then at the store. Callers make Woodsy feel vindicated and LOB has no qualms admitting she’s a thief. I’ve always heard never to grocery shop hungry, but apparently the market is a free smorgasbord feast! Poor Sienna could not get back into her car thanks to too tight parking spaces. “Sugarbabe” author who says the key to healthy marriages is negotiated cheating gets LOB and the cast fired up. A M1 calls in saying he may have known/dated the author, although it’s highly doubtful. Finding out the person you’re dating has something in their past or does something weird is next. Audio of rapper/actor Ice T after his arrest with “Coco” in the background is played to Woodsy’s delight. There are two big reasons The Kid loves Coco, and we’re not talking Hershey’s! An email about having an open relationship towards swinging with other swingers gets swung around the studio with the cast all on the same page, opinion-wise. Mikey’s brother and Bark Maumann take pride in displaying their Playboy magazines around the house and this elicits one of the funniest Jay remarks ever! Sienna and Lauren learn about jock straps and cups. Finally, audio of LOB’s kids play is debuted (albeit to her embarrassment). By the time you read this the video is already up on mikeyshow.com. Woods is hurt when Lauren says she doesn’t need to sit by him on the plane. Can you imagine Sly Stallone as Han Solo? The Kid can’t keep his eyes off Sienna’s papers and continues to get away with it.
Bumper Music
| 1. Break On Through by The Doors |  |
| 2. Love The Way You Lie by Eminem | |
| 3. Special by Garbage | |
| 4. Valerie Loves Me by Material Issue | |
| 5. 1999 by Prince | |
| 6. Soul Singing by The Black Crowes | |
| 7. Still Of The Night by Whitesnake | |
| 8. My Life by The Game | |
| 9. #41 by Dave Matthews Band | |
| 10. Black Metallic by Catherine Wheel | |
| 11. Digital Bath by Deftones | |
| 12. Not Enough Time by INXS | |
| 13. Bitter Sweet Symphony by The Verve | |
| 14. Saved By Zero by The Fixx | |
| 15. The Catalyst by Linkin Park | |
| 16. Hearts of the Innocent by Kutless | |
radio comedyembarrassing storiestravel and transitCraigslist safetyfood samplingpregnancyrelationships and fidelitychildren's theatertelevision historymikey showelevatorgiraffes
Mikey, Woods, Lauren O'Brien, Sienna, Jay, and Chris turned everyday embarrassments into the show's strongest comedy, especially Woods trapping the crew with an elevator fart, Lauren's oversized rooster tattoo and rediscovered mermaid play, and Sienna being unable to squeeze into her car late in pregnancy. The crew also debated whether Woods was stealing when he sampled bulk candy and whether Craigslist transactions were practical or dangerously reckless. Their longest argument centered on Holly Hill's proposed negotiated infidelity: the hosts rejected her claim that men inevitably cheat and said commitment requires effort, while warning that open relationships create jealousy, health risks, and emotional damage. Other standout stories covered a traffic-straddling Chinese bus, a bound woman summoning help with her toes, and Betty White revealing that she turned down the Today Show role later filled by Barbara Walters.
What happened, in order
Elevator Gas Trap
Woods deliberately farted just as an elevator closed, leaving Mikey and Jay trapped in the smell before warning two strangers not to enter.
Bus Over Traffic
The hosts marveled at a proposed Chinese transit bus built to straddle traffic, then wondered what would happen when it encountered a truck or startled an uninformed driver.
The Oversized Rooster
Lauren O'Brien admitted she wanted a small rooster tattoo but stayed silent when the artist enlarged it into a colorful three-by-three-inch design she immediately regretted.
Craigslist Wild West
A discussion of prostitution ads turned into an argument over Craigslist safety, with Mikey fearing robberies while Jay and Lauren defended meeting buyers, sellers, roommates, and even babysitting clients through the sit
Fear of Giraffes
While guessing Eminem's fears, Woods confessed that giraffes frighten him because he dislikes their long necks, baffling the rest of the crew.
Awkward Family Viewing
Mikey described sitting beside his mother in a hospital waiting room when an explicit Law & Order line aired, prompting the crew to trade stories about uncomfortable movie and television scenes watched with parents or ch
Bulk-Bin Sampling Trial
Mikey accused Woods of stealing after he grazed on chocolate-covered raisins and peanuts at Henry's, while Woods insisted tasting bulk food was legitimate sampling and callers explained store policies.
Pregnant and Parked In
Nine-months-pregnant Sienna found both doors of her car blocked after a doctor's appointment and had to sit on a bench for about fifteen minutes until another driver returned.
Negotiated Infidelity
The crew attacked Holly Hill's claim that women should negotiate permission for inevitable male cheating, arguing that commitment requires daily effort and that open arrangements invite jealousy, disease, and emotional d
Typing Help With Toes
After an Atlanta intruder tied a woman to her headboard and stole her phone and car, she pulled a laptop within reach and typed a plea to her boyfriend with her toes so he could call 911.
Mermaid Video Unearthed
Chris found footage of Lauren and her sister performing their children's play Mermaids Sunny and Sky, and the crew teased an embarrassed Lauren about the costumes, sharks, production problems, and bewildered older kids.
Betty White Said No
Betty White recalled rejecting repeated offers to become the first woman on the Today Show, leaving the job to Barbara Walters despite promises of a luxury hotel and weekly flights home.
People mentioned
MikeyWoodsLauren O'BrienSiennaJayChrisEminemHolly HillBetty WhiteBarbara Walters
40,329 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
KBCT San Diego, the Lincoln Financial Media Station, the new home of The Mikey Show. This is FM 94.9. My imitation of a lady from the Food Network. Or my Mrs. Woods. Yeah. Or Hoyle. Does she sound like that? Yeah. Hi, y'all. Hi, y'all. Hi, y'all. The sweetest. Welcome to the program. It's The Mikey Show. And you can give us a call right now. 570-1949. Open phones at the beginning and end of every show. So you can call about anything that you want right now. The floor is yours. And you can talk about whatever you want or do whatever you want. We have a crackhead in our midst, by the way. I know. Just so you know. We're all kind of wondering how today is going to go with Lauren O'Brien. Because she, first of all, had an ice cream sandwich for breakfast.
which never happens. I've never seen anything like it. Has never happened. Never. I've never seen her eat ice cream. And drank a five-hour energy drink. She's cracked out. Were you up all night? What's going on? What is the deal? I wanted to make sure I was on point this morning. I woke up a little early because I carpooled with Jay and Woods. And then I didn't bring any food, and I was starving. And the first thing that jumped out at me in the vending machine was an ice cream. Oh, my goodness. You look intoxicated. I do? Like, your eyes are all like... By the 9 o'clock hour, she's going to be like... No, no, no. The bottle says you won't crash. Really? Won't you? Does it also say take an ice cream sandwich? Yeah, that's right. Well, today after the show... Woodsy and Lauren and Jay are going to New Orleans and going out there for the morning show boot camp. It's a convention where a bunch of morning people get together, hang out, have fun, share ideas, that kind of thing. I have to tell you, Lauren driving to work today and Lauren from the backseat goes, so.
What is your interest level, you guys, on maybe seeing some jazz music while we're out there? And I go, mine sits right at about zero percent. I know. I was like, jazz music. Oh, my gosh. Some jazz flute maybe? Some jazz flute. Was JN? No, he didn't even say it. He just laughed. I said if there's drinks served, then I will love you. Then it's free. I'm not paying for it. Because I go. I go, you guys know there's a casino there, so we can go play some cards or whatever. And LLB's like, what about going to see some jazz? Maybe I'll pass when I'm 60 years old. It's the heart of jazz. Are you just trying to think of anything where black guys might be? Is that the deal? Are you just straining your brain? Would you guys want to go to an NBA practice? Yeah. A Hornets game? No, I love jazz music. I do. Hey, guys, while we're in New Orleans, what would you think of maybe going to a pickup basketball game somewhere in the inner city? What would you think of that?
I would not be opposed to the idea. Weird. 570-1949 is our number. Give us a call right now or text us 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. Woodsy is our sports guy. He is 35. I'm 40. Not even the oldest guy on the show I'm used to. being the oldest guy in the room for the most part, 29 years old. That's Lauren O'Brien. She's the blonde girl to my right. And by the way, thank you to M1 Chris, who found the YouTube video of Lauren doing a play for little kids. Yes. It's like a play where you're a shark. Do you play a shark? I do the voices. You do the voices. I thought you were playing a wizard. Based on the shirt that she has. I'm a mermaid. She had these wizard sleeves. Okay, the sleeves are the fins. Yes. Okay, my mermaid costume. It's awesome. This is right before we went on the air, too. This wasn't like in middle school or anything like that. Oh, no, it was like a few weeks ago. It was, yeah. Yeah, it was right before we signed on the air together back in February. She had done this. Yep, I was starting up a little business. Then we got it. I have business cards. There you go.
Professional wizard. Yes. Sienna is our news girl. She is 25 years of age. She has a story for the ages. Really? I haven't told a soul this story, by the way. I was reading the recaps this morning, and I read her recap, and I went, oh, wow. Not even my husband knows this story. That's what she said. Really? Yeah. Oh, boy. It's pretty embarrassing. Yeah, it's pretty embarrassing. Can't wait. Jay is our producer. And Jay is 47. He's in the next room. And our phone screener is Cross. Let's cross. So you can call and talk to Chris. We do that because we worked with a DJ in Dallas. And that's the way that he sounded every day. 97.1 The Eagle. Let's cross. Makes me laugh. Kill Sienna. Okay. So today on the program. we have Chargers tickets to give away. Chargers Bears. Oh, that's so exciting. There's music to my ears. I know it. We're giving away Charger tickets today. Yeah. I love it. Which means Charger football is back. Now, here's the deal. We're doing word of the day now. And so I will update you on word of the day. What you're looking for is for us to use the word of the day in a regular sentence. We're working it into a regular sentence. I'll tell you what the word of the day is.
Between now and the end of the show, I will be telling you what it is and updating you on the word of the day. But what you have to do is wait for us to try to work it into a sentence, okay? Could be during commercials. Could be during the middle of a bit. Could be at any time. During sports. During sports. But it will come between now and the end of the show. The word of the day is biceps. The word of the day is biceps. So that's what you're listening for us to use and kind of work into a sentence. 7.30 this morning, I will be telling a story that Woodsy is unaware of. And it is something that I observed. And if I say where I observed it, he'll know exactly what it is. So I won't say where I observed it. But it was something that Woods did. that I would like to get people's take on. Was it what I did in the elevator yesterday? I cannot say, I cannot say what it is. You did? I guessed. It wasn't that, so let's talk about that. Nope, so let's talk about that. You farted in the elevator? Yes, he did. Yes, he did, Sienna. Were there people in there? Check it out, Sienna. So it was only me and Woods and Jay. Oh, yes. Oh, man. It was only me and Woods and Jay. Did it on purpose? We're on the seventh floor. Yeah.
As the elevator, he waited right as the elevator doors were three inches from closing. Woods goes, oh. And I go. Oh, my gosh. And I go, no, you didn't. Why did you do that? Why did you do that? Why did you do that? Oh, my gosh. Did you immediately cover your face and your mouth and nose? He buried his head in his iPhone and was like, why did he do that? Jay, why did he just do that? Why did he do that? I thought it was going to be okay because there was no immediate impact. Yeah. And then it was slow release. Yeah. He snuck up on you. Oh, he sure did. If I were in there, you may have gotten a knee to the grind. It gets better. Yeah. Uh-oh. And so. Oh, gosh. What? We're going down the elevator, going down to the first floor. Feeling the gas. And I'm thinking in my head, hurts atmosphere, hurts atmosphere, hurts atmosphere. And the elevator doors open up, and standing in front of us is a woman. Oh. And a man. Oh, gosh. Strangers. And Woods has the rocks. Oh, gosh. To say. As we're walking out and they're walking in, he has the rocks to say, wouldn't do that. Wouldn't do that. I thought he was going to say, do not. Mikey, I can't believe you did that. No, he didn't say that. I'm not going to throw him on the bus. Wouldn't do that. Oh, my. And I also, right when the door opened, I ran out first. Yeah. As fast as I could. Mikey was last. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I walked out and I go, well.
That worked just like I planned. You're being inappropriate. Unbelievable. My favorite thing to do in the world is to make Mikey uncomfortable in an elevator. Or really just in life. I think we've talked about how when we're in the elevator, Woods always goes to the back of the elevator, which I hate. Every time. He goes to the very back of the elevator, and then as the elevator stops on the way down and people get into the elevator, strangers, he does a thing. where he palms his hand and he uses the back of his hand to pretend that the person in front of us has long, long, straight, like, crystal gale length hair. Even if it's a man with a buzz. Even if it's a man with a buzz, it doesn't matter who it is. Woods does a very quick, like, I'm stroking the back of your hair with the back of my hand. And it's so smooth and so long. And he does it like it's smooth and silky. Yep. I'm always so thankful when there's somebody in there because if there's no one in there, he does it to me. But he actually touches my face. He touched Jay's face. But the reason that I hate it is twofold. One, I hate it because it's a stranger and it makes me uncomfortable. Two, I hate it because it's so hysterical that I can't, I can't, like, and I know that if I laugh, they'll look at me.
I laugh every time out loud. I can't help it. They look at me, and it's like, I did something wrong. I'm making fun, and I didn't do a thing. I can't watch. I don't look at Woods in the elevator. I also may do a fake butt grab from behind. He gets close to touching his cheek, too. Which makes me crazy, because I'm like, if they move. Just a tiny fraction of an inch. Next time you do it, I'm pushing you forward. It's fine. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. I'm going to. It's a done deal. Next time he does the stroke, the butt grab, push. Another move I haven't busted out yet is when we're in the elevator, I might grab Mike's hand and slap it on somebody's butt. He's going to kill you. With your hand. What will you do? Die. Die. He will crawl up. Die. He will go, oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh. That's exactly. Oh, oh, oh. I'm having a hard time. Imagining. Just going. Ow. Once you just grab Lauren's hand and demonstrate and smacked it on the counter. Smashed it into the counter. That's what you do. Okay. So anyway, 730 this morning, I will tell you about Woods. I can't even say anything because I don't want to give him any hints. Okay. I have no idea. Weird. I will. I'll give you one hint. Okay.
You don't know what it is, and the reason that you won't know what it is is because, as usual, Woodsy doesn't have any issue with what I'm going to tell you. No issue. Stop sign? I'm not going to tell you. I'm not going to tell you. I'm not going to tell you. Glittering. I'm not going to tell you. M1, Harold from San Marcos, what up? Good morning. What's going on? Hey, I wanted to wish my wife a happy 15th anniversary. Wow. Dude, that's cool. What'd you get her? Can you say? Is she listening? She will be, probably. So you probably don't want to say. We actually went out for a nice evening last weekend. Really? Yeah, we celebrated last weekend. It was really cool. Congratulations. Did you arm wrestle her? No. She don't let me do that anymore. It's an old bit. Yeah, she does it. Has she ever, did you know, for people that don't know, Harold is a professional arm wrestler. That will break your arm in half. Yeah. Yeah, he is, he's a state champion. Yeah. Wow. He's a state champion. He's a beast. Yeah, he's pretty awesome. I accidentally hung up on him. I'm sorry, Harold. Well, congratulations. Yeah, congrats, dude. Have fun. Congrats. 15 years. 15 years of marriage. 15 years. They were high school sweethearts. That's awesome. It's pretty cool.
What's some of the things happening today? Oh, isn't today Obama's birthday? It is. How old is he today? 49. Only two years older than Jay. Yeah. We should get him on the horn and do a falsetto birthday. You want to do that? Yeah. Can we get him? Jay, can we get the president? You know that. Got him already. Oh, we get the president. Okay, cool. President. Mr. President. Yeah, is this Mr. President? Ladies, Mr. President. Hi, this is Steve Woods with the Mikey Show in San Diego. How are you? Woods. Woods, Woods, Woods. That's right. Happy birthday. Happy birthday, Mr. President. Thank you very much. What are you doing right now? I can't tell you that. Are you in the Oval Office? I am in the Oval Office if you call the Oval Office the toilet.
It's a standard routine. It is oval, which is why I can't tell you exactly what I'm doing. Are you pantsless? Yes. Well, we just, you know, we're fans of you, and we really appreciate, you know, you being the leader of our country. You know, I understand that you would do something called Falsetto Friday. Yeah, yeah, Falsetto Friday, but, you know, today is kind of our Friday. Can you wish me a happy birthday? You got it. You guys ready? Yeah. One, two, three. Happy birthday to you. Word. Happy birthday to you. Word. Gorgeous. Absolutely beautiful. Thank you. Absolutely beautiful. Thank you. What are you going to do for your birthday? Buy a robe. Any favorite meals you're going to go have? Anything like that? Probably fly in some In-N-Out.
Nice. Good call. I love In-N-Out. And then I'm going to go down to Louisiana and have some shrimp because I love to vacation in the Gulf region. Everyone should. We'll be down there, too. Maybe we should meet up. Meet us up. Maybe we don't. We get a drink. See you at Pat O'Brien's tonight? About midnight? Maybe we do. Okay. All right. All right. Happy birthday, pal. Happy birthday. See you tonight. I can't believe he answered the toilet. Or answer the phone on the toilet. I do it all the time. You know that. Great. They may never call you again. Pretty cool. Boy, we have a pretty big-time show, man, if we can get that guy. If you get a job, Jay. That's the kind of phone list I have. That's right. Did you guys know that today BlackBerry is releasing their new product? Not releasing. It was just introduced yesterday, the BlackBerry Torch. Okay, so does that mean that they're saying this is going to be on sale pretty soon? Yeah, it's going to be on sale August 12th. Oh, okay. Yes, and it's going to be $199 with a two-year contract through AT&T. Really? Yes. AT&T. How come they get everything? I don't know.
So they got the iPhone exclusively. Now they got the BlackBerry Torch exclusively. I know. Well, you know, all the other Motorola, Samsung, Apple, they've been releasing all their new phones. Droid. Droid. And now BlackBerry, we haven't heard much from BlackBerry. So it was unveiled yesterday. And this phone has both a touchscreen and the BlackBerry signature full alphabet keyboard. People seem to be really into it. Touchscreen. Is this the first touchscreen? No. No? No. They have one already. They do? But it's through Verizon. I think it was. It's through Verizon, though. Or the Storm has like a click screen. So tell me again what's different or cool about the Torch. This one has, it's a touchscreen, and it has the full alphabet keyboard. That's what people are freaking out about. Oh, that's what's new? Is that it's touchscreen with a keyboard. That's what the iPhone does. And it's through AT&T, $199 with a two-year contract. Not bad. Because what I do know about the BlackBerry is that you have little physical keys that you type with. Tiny little keyboard. Tiny little keyboard, and now you're going to have a virtual one on the touchscreen, and you're going to do that. Best of both worlds. Well, L.O.B. and Woodsy are both BlackBerry. Do you guys like the idea? Would you like the idea of a touchscreen keyboard, or do you like your little plastic keyboard? I think that it has both. I like it. I like it. I think it slides open so you can actually have little buttons, or you can have a touchscreen. The one thing I don't like is...
And it only happens like once every couple months. If there's a 1-800 number where they spell out, it'll be like, call 1-800, get blue. iFlySWA for Southwest. Exactly. And the letters on your keyboard don't match up to the numbers on a traditional. The number three on a phone is ABC. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn't have that on my phone. It doesn't have it. I remember that with the blackberry. So if you have a, you know, 1-800, like we're going, we're flying Southwest. Yeah. And I was going to call them the other day and I was driving my car and I'm like, oh, it's 1-800-IFLY-SWA. Right. And then I go, oh, yeah. Where's S? Where's SW? Where's SW? I don't have it. No idea. Yeah, I'm surprised they haven't fixed that yet. Yeah, figure that out. It's been a problem for me for the past couple of years. Me too. I bet they figured it out with the torch. I mean. Let's hope so. I go to, what I did is I had to go online. Go to their website and then click on the number to call instead of being able to dial it. It was a beating. That stinks. I've called people and been like, what is... Draw it out. We'll be talking about the Brett Favre stuff in Woods on Sports today. Crying Wolf. We have so much stuff to go over today, man. This is a funny story. There is the most amazingly unusual...
bus that has been uh brought to the chinese public i don't even know how i can describe what this looks like you have to see it it's unimaginable sienna it looks like a hollowed out monorail yeah yes and through the hollow part is the freeway or roads where cars are driving you allow cars to pass under you so you're literally driving If you're on the train or you're on this bus, you're going over cars, which are driving on lanes. Underneath you. Underneath you. It's nuts. It's nuts. It looks amazing. This is what their new plan is, and they want to relieve congestion without having to widen the roads. So they want to issue this new 3D Express coach, which is the three-dimensional fast bus. And it's going to be fast. It's going to go over cars. Yeah, because it doesn't have to wait in traffic. Amazing. It's going to allow cars less than two meters high to travel underneath the upper level of this bus. What happens when they come upon a big truck? Diesel. Maybe they can't go in that lane. Yeah.
They can't go in that lane. What if somebody doesn't clear it? Yeah, that's what I mean. Yeah, they think that they can clear it. That's bad. That's scary. That thing's cool. It looks so cool. It's like putting a tunnel over a car. It looks like the future. Yeah, I was just going to say, it looks like when you see a movie set in the future. Like, oh yeah, they have buses like that that are hollow. It's amazing. It's so cool. I wonder if it gets XM or Sirius. I bet you can get wireless on it. I bet it's wireless. Oh, absolutely. You can get wireless. It's so Chinese. Isn't that nuts? I mean, imagine if you were driving on the road and a bus just goes right over you. You're like, oh, wait, there's a bus. Oh, my gosh. How do you get used to that? What if you are like Lauren and you don't have a television and you don't know anything about this and all of a sudden it goes passing over you? And it just scares you half to death. Oh, yeah. You think it's like the end of days? Black cloud going over you? Yeah, it would freak me out. Chinese think of everything. That's when you need to make a stop. That's the button. Oh, and you pull on the little wire. You pull on the little wire. No, there's an actual gong. Oh, yeah. When you need a driver to make a stop. And you go, okay, I heard it. I got it, dude. I'm stopping. It's been resonating for three blocks.
Listen to that sustain, Mike. It's really got some sustain. 570-1949 is our number. And text us, too. 949-Mikey at gmail.com. So, Woodsy and I, off the air, were talking about who we thought had a good... Oops, sorry. I do that every time. Every time. Every time. We were talking today. off the air before the show started about who we thought had the best chance of being NFL Rookie of the Year. And it was a trip because we kind of, we agree basically. Unanimous. Unanimous. And you may disagree, but we'll tell you who it is because the same person that we think may have a good chance of being Rookie of the Year signed a contract yesterday. Tell you about that. Talk about the Brett Favre stuff. If you haven't already heard it, we'll tell you all about it. Don't forget the word of the day is... And you're waiting for us to use that word in a sentence between now and the end of the show. Part of the Mikey Show now. 570-1949. Or text. 949mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Miller Lite and Scion. On the main stage. Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros. The Rogue Wave. The Wigs. The Wigs.
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The number one middleweight contender, Chael Sonnen. I'm not here to be number two. I'm here to be number one. I don't celebrate silver medals. I'm here for 12 pounds of gold, and I'm going to get it on August 7th. Looks to dethrone the most dominant champion of all time, Anderson the Spider Silva. Anderson wants a fight. He just found one. He's finally going to fight the number one contender. No one has come close to defeating the best pound-for-pound fighter in the world. I acknowledge that he's a fantastic fighter. He is the champion, but I am the best. Plus, John Fitch takes on Tiago Alves. Tequila Casadores presents UFC 117, Silva vs. Sonnen from Oracle Arena in Oakland, California. This Saturday night, only on Pay-Per-View. Order using your Cox remote by tuning to channel 501 or in HD on channel 798 after 5.30 p.m. on Saturday. Enjoy the fight. Is the IRS ruining your life? Are you afraid of losing everything? You can end the despair you feel right now. Get ready to write down an important phone number you're going to need to help solve your IRS nightmare. Hello, I'm John Harris, president of J.K. Harris & Company, the nation's largest tax representation firm.
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years old who are currently controlling condition with lantis or insulin glargine and otherwise healthy call profile at 1-866-245-5921 to see if you qualify that's 1-866-245-5921 more fm 94.9 random acts of kindness with your tickets the independence jam coastal invasion silver sun pickups and new arcade fire cds look for fm 94.9 today between noon and one mossy sion 4455 mission bay drive more at fm 94.9 sd.com This report is brought to you by Allstate. Want to save money without cutting insurance coverage? Get Allstate today. Dollar for dollar, nobody protects you like Allstate. The 8 eastbound at the 805, a little slow this morning. Also the 78 eastbound between Escondido Avenue, Rancho, Santa Fe Road. We've got some slowing in pockets. The 15 southbound through Escondido at Center City Parkway, a delay here, but really it's not bad. It speeds in the 50s, so can't complain.
This report is brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners. San Diego Toyota dealerships have a $24.95 lube oil and filter replacement for United States Armed Forces members and veterans, including their immediate family. See your dealer for details. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't have any, you know, athletic ability. Lauren. I was a bit of a pyro when I was a kid. I knew how it worked. I knew how destructive it was. I still started fires on the reg. Woods. I don't like to be tickled because I squeal like a little girl. Sienna. I love cruises. And Jay. I'm wearing Dockers right now. On FM 94.9. Nice. He did this one for me. You want to talk about honey in your ears? It's honey in my ears. Oh. It's a new Rihanna and Eminem. Oh, it's... It's going to be the number one. No question. It already is the number one on iTunes. Get ready. Most downloaded. Here he comes. I can't tell you what it really is. I can only tell you what it feels like. And right now there's a steel knife in my windpipe. I can't breathe while I still fight. What, what, what? Spit on her? My gosh. What? Woods just started pumping his fists when this came on.
And he had some plastic chewed up stuff in his hand and spit just flew across my face. You're fine. How good is that? That's good. It's like gorgeous voice and amazing rapper combined. Need to let you know that the word of the day is biceps. And it'll be good for Chargers tickets, Chargers Bears. And this is the deal. When you hear me work the word. biceps into a sentence. Caller 9 at 570-1949 will win those Chargers Bears tickets. This is great. I've never heard it. It's the first time I've ever heard it. I listen to it on repeat. I know. It's the first time I'm hearing it and I like it. I listen to it on repeat. What did I say? Repeat. It's okay. No, I just say it repeat. Okay. You guys say it. Tomato, tomato. Maybe I'm pregnant and I'll slit your throat and watch you bleed out in here. Maybe I do. So, by the way, I said this earlier, but it's worth repeating. 7.30 this morning. Woodsy gets his. Weird. Well. Got the spit all greased up, ready to go. That's right. A little fire smoldering underneath it. You're so fun to get, though. Oh, I know. I'm like the best guy to get. You are fun to get. Well, what I want to do is I want to pose the question at 7.30.
do what Woodsy did. Guarantee you, Woodsy will see no problem with this. He may shock me and go, oh, maybe that was a little sideways. What the hell are you talking about? But I have a feeling he's going to go, what, dude? I have a feeling it's something with my driving, is what I think. I can't say. Because I drove a lot the last couple weeks. Did this happen when other people were around or when you guys were off-bromancing somewhere? We were off bromancing. My second job is Mikey's chauffeur, so it's got to be something with my driving. Isn't that funny that last time that we went somewhere together, I physically drove to his home and picked him up. I'll tell you what. I said to him, hey, Woodsy, you want to go blah, blah, blah? He goes, he just wrote back, pick me up. Come get me. Come get me. I wish I knew how to quit you. You know what I mean? We know what you mean. I had a boyfriend once. I remember those days. It was so fun. Did he say that? Did he say, come pick me up? What did he say? No, I'm just giving you a hard time. She's giving you a hard time because it's her boyfriend. I got you. Right over his head. It really did. Woods and I were talking about who could be NFL Rookie of the Year, and this person signed a contract yesterday. That's coming up in Woods on Sports.
Woodsy went and got his PHC yesterday. Mm-hmm. Calls that the perfect haircut. Was it P? It's good. It's short. Let's see. It was short, dude. Let's see. Oh, my goodness. Rub it. It's short. He has like a long, what would you call it, a number three or something? No, she didn't use clippers. It was like a haircut. It looks like a buzz, long buzz. You look like an extra from Platoon. Yeah, that's exactly what I look like. Yeah. Like, I need. An assault rifle. Yeah. Like, wading through the jumbles. High and tight. High and tight. H&T, real good. What did the wife think? She likes it. She always likes my haircuts. She does. It'll grow in. It's just in shock. Yeah, and, you know, I wanted it a little higher and tighter. When you're a dude and you go to get your hair cut, well, I shouldn't say when you're a dude. When I had hair and I used to go get a haircut. Yeah. Because I have a shaved head now, but when I had hair and I would go get a haircut.
I was always too self-conscious to say to the person that was cutting my hair that they were doing something I didn't like. Never. I do the same thing. You do too? Yeah, I can't say anything. So what about you, Sienna? One time I freaked out. Really? And actually cried. Really? I usually cry right at home. There. There? And I demanded someone else to fix it. Sienna, what did they do? Well, I was getting my hair highlighted and it was like darker than when I came in and I wanted it lighter. And I was like, what? what is this? They made it darker? And she's blow drying it. She's like, well, you said you wanted it natural. I'm like, I do, but I also want it lighter and it's darker and I just, I don't know. I freaked out. Yeah, I've done the freak out. I would never, like, I remember going in and they were cutting my hair way too short, but I would just sit there and watch. Yeah. I couldn't, I didn't have, I didn't have it in me to go, excuse me. Pardon me. Pardon me. That's too short. I've been that person. You know what I have done? I have gotten a really turd haircut at one place, gone to Supercuts and got my head shaved. Really? That's what I did. Immediately after. Wow. Like from one place, it's like, hey, thanks pretty much. I'll see you next time. Yeah. And then gone to a Supercuts and be like, what are you going to charge me if you just shave my head with a number three? Yeah. I got my haircut two weeks ago and I told the barber, I said, hey, can you take a little more off? He goes, nope, that's not what you want. Oh, are you kidding? And I was like,
No, it's just a little. No, it looks good. So I just went and got my hair cut yesterday at Maddie's shop. Yeah, I mean, I do look like a Marine right now. There's no question. But, hey, it's going to grow in. I'd forgotten how good it is to have the massage and the wash. Mikey Show, hello. Hi. Hi. Hello. Hello. This is Captain Buzzkill. Hi, Captain Buzzkill. I'm calling because I don't like what you just said on the radio, what Mikey just said on the radio. What did he say? He said that words like I'm an extra from Platoon. An extra from Platoon, yeah. Oh, yeah, because his hair is really short. Because my hair is so short. And I just think that sounds sensitive. To my haircut lady? Yeah. Are you sleeping? No, I'm breathing. I'm breathing pretty heavy. Dude, take the phone away just a little bit. I just think that sounds sensitive because you... You know, what if I, what if I fought in Vietnam? What? What if I fought in Vietnam and he said something about Platoon? Oh, we're just, it's just comedy. We're just joking around. It's just comedy, Captain Buzzkill. That's funny. That's funny. That's funny. That's funny. That's funny. It's nothing to get real worked up about. Captain Buzzkill. Platoon was a movie. I know. It's also real. Wow. Are you standing in front of a fan?
I'm sorry. I'm not trying to offend anyone, but I don't know what the distraction is in the phone. What does that even mean? What do you mean you don't know? Do you know how many people you just defended? Oh, Captain Buzzkill, lighten up. You gotta lighten up, pal. Go get some cereal, start your day. That's passive aggression, saying lighten up because you know that I'm a couple pounds that's over a week. Oh, no. We're saying you take yourself too seriously. Yeah, go take a jog, maybe. Oh, you're saying that because you know that it's hard for people to jog? What? Whatever. I'm so irritated. You're offended. I'm sorry. Fine. We love you. He was not a happy camper. No. You are a sad, strange little man. Yeah. I just, I mean.
I would never want to offend anybody with my haircut. No, but I mean, you were saying something that was so innocuous. It wasn't even anything bad. I look like I'm in the military. That's all I meant. I'm not slamming the military. People have to get so upset about it. I don't know. It's weird. So, Woodsy did a thing where he was packing for New Orleans because Woodsy and Lauren and Jay are going to New Orleans. And it was so funny. I was thinking about it. I'm like, all the stuff, the preparation that you go through when you're... going to take a trip and all the stuff that you do. He does a deal, Woodsy does, where he packs workout clothes. Every vacation. Every vacation that he goes on. Never uses the workout clothes. Never worked out on vacation. Every single trip I go on, I'm like, Jamie will be packing. She's like, should I pack your, like, I'm like. Yeah, I need my tennis shoes and my long shorts. Jamie packs your bag. No, I packed my own last night for the first time ever, by the way. Wow. But she is like, do you want your stuff? I'm like, yeah, I need my sneakers and stuff in there because I'll probably hit the gym when I'm there. Will you? Really? I'm the complete opposite. I don't put them in there just so when I'm gone, I'm like, well, I don't have any shoes. There's no sports bra. Yeah. Oh, and I wear it. I wear it, you know, laying around the room ordering room service, dipping snuff. I wear those real comfy workout shorts. Strenuous workout. Shirtless. Yeah.
And it's one of those deals where I think most of us will pack stuff. This is not going to happen. Why are we packing that? Yeah. I'll be working out. Yeah? You will? Mm-hmm. I already checked out the facilities online. You clown. I don't even look. You did? Did you bring a bathing suit? I did. Oh, great. I didn't. Perfect. You buy one. Did you bring a three-piece suit? I did not. Just in case. Searsucker. Just in case. I always pack a nice dress. Yeah. I packed the one nice shirt. That's a nice dress. You never know. I always pack one nice dress. I'm one Sooners fan from San Diego. Hey, guys. Good morning. What's up, dude? Man, you know, we're talking about the haircut thing, and I can take that a step further. I've got a lot of really mediocre tattoos, and I would put a good portion of why they're mediocre. I can't tell them, like, hey, you know, what's going on there? Oh, my God. Yeah, 100%. That's permanent. You have any of that? Yeah, I have tattoos, and I didn't think of it until. Boomer Sooner said it. He's right. I will be getting a tattoo. He'll be in the middle of it and I'll look at it and I'll be like, it's not really the way I want it. Same thing with him. I hate. I only have one tattoo and I hate it. What is it, L.O.B.? It's a rooster. It's a rooster. Where is it, L.O.B.? It's on my inner ankle. Inch-wise in length. How many inches would it be, would you say?
Three by three, maybe. Three by three. It's like the size of a softball. Conservative estimate. Baseball. Yeah, very conservative estimate. Whatever. It's a big, colorful rooster. She wanted to get a little tiny rooster, but the guy at the tattoo shop was like, I think that'll look a lot better if you go bigger with that. Didn't have the cojones to be like, no, actually, I'm pretty sure of what I want. Instead, I was like, okay, okay. As soon as he started, I was like, oh, boy, that's not what I wanted. Big rooster. Big giant rooster. Insert your own joke there. Yeah, insert joke. Insert joke. Blank-a-doodle-doo. Blank-a-doodle-doo. So I want to know. You want to know. The bigger the better. We're going to find out right now. It's Woods on Sports. Woods on Sports brought to you by our friends at Clearview Eye and Laser Center. The Padres lost a heartbreaker last night, man. Matt Latosk went out. He gave up two runs and ran into apparently one of the best moves the Dodgers have made in a long time. They got Ted Lilly from the Cubs. Guy at one point retired 20 Padres in a row. Are you kidding? I was watching. I was like, oh, my God, three up, three down, three up, three down, three up, three down. It was insane. Oh, wow. Miguel Tejada got on the board with a homer. It was the only run the Padres scored, man.
Latos pitched well, and he shouldered a lot of the blame for the loss. And it was like, dude, you gave up two runs. You ran into a great pitcher last night. So it was a pretty tough, tough loss. But both of them pitched their butts off last night. The Padres are still leading the division. Yeah, yeah. And I'll tell you, man, those Giants are creeping. Yeah, dude. And they are creeping fast. They're good. We've got to keep winning, man. Got to keep putting Ws on the board. So tonight at 7-10, Wade LeBlanc takes on Vicente Padilla. Also, the Chargers have possibly struck gold with one of the guys they picked up kind of off the scrap heap in the offseason. They grabbed former UT cornerback, strong safety, Nathan Vasher from the Bears. Apparently, the guy's lighting it up out there. They've had him, and he's lighting it up, man. Nathan Vasher is awesome. Yeah, he's playing great. He's playing great, and it's like you look at the Bears, and you're like, what did they see in him? that, you know, let him go. Yeah. So here he is just talking about, you know, being a charger and all that good stuff. Cut one. Feeling good. I feel like, you know, this team has a lot of talent. I think we're coming out every day at training camp, working like, you know, we want to go out and win the Super Bowl. So I'm excited about the possibilities of the team right now. Dude. Nathan Vasher is an incredible special team. Absolutely. Incredible. And he, you know, hey, he's...
bucking for a starting cornerback position on this team, man. And that's what they're saying is he's playing really, really, really well. This is like the one story I was hoping we wouldn't have to talk about. And no, it's not A-Rod not hitting 600 because that's driving me insane, too. And it hasn't happened for six weeks, it feels like. And, you know, in the middle of that, Yanks are on a three-game losing streak, so it's been real sweet for the kid. This is the one I didn't want to talk about. Brett. freaking far. I didn't want to do this this year. I didn't want to have to talk about it every day and watch and look. You know, Willie, Wonie, people, they came out yesterday and said, oh yeah, he's been saying in Mississippi he's retiring. Well, the coach, Brad Childress, is not so sure. Cut to. I'm not aware of any of those reports. Obviously, been out here for the last three hours or so. It's a man right there. Yeah, it is. But, you know, if and when. You know, the case is he does something one way or the other. I'm sure that I'll communicate or he'll communicate with me. I'm sure of that.
He looks like, I know he sounds like that. He looks like a professor of science. He looks like an accountant. He does. He looks like an accountant. Oh, yeah. You look at him, you're like. That's the same voice? And then he gets in your grill and rips your throat out. Imagine a blind date, going on a blind date with him. You think you're getting this, like, huge man. Well, and so then the next clip that you're going to hear from Brad Childress talks a lot but doesn't really say anything. Cut three. Go ahead. It wouldn't surprise me one way or the other. You know, whether he elects to play or whether he elects to retire. It's your only two choices, by the way. Either way. And it's the big thing is that he's at peace with it. He's out there watching cheerleaders in the background. Yeah, he is. He's completely not paying attention. You can hear him yelling. Yeah, he's looking at the cheerleaders. It wouldn't surprise me one way or the other. Hey, what are you doing? Whether he elects to play or whether he elects to retire. Brad, eyes over here. I think all of us can live with it either way. Brad. That's funny.
The big thing is that he's at peace with it. It's funny. He's like, you know, he's going to play or he's not going to play. And I think, you know, either way, we're okay with it one way or the other. And it's like, what are you saying, dude? How many times has Brett Favre done this? Fifteen. He's done it three times. I can think of three. It's driving me insane. That is annoying. And then finally, Mikey and I were talking about, you know, before we got on the air today, who we thought would be. The NFL Rookie of the Year unanimously. We thought Indomitian Su would be the guy. He's the defensive end for the Lions. He is a freaking beast, man. He finally signed yesterday. He's weird. He's weird good. He's scary. He's so good that it's weird. It's weird. Watching him in college was like watching. It was a man among boys. Yeah. He was absolutely insane. So he yesterday signed five years, 68 mil, 40 of which is guaranteed. Unbelievable. In the wrong business. Unbelievable. Maybe I lift weights more when I'm a kid. So he's missed four days of practice so far. But, man, he is in camp. And watch out. Lions, they didn't win a game last year. Yeah. This guy can single-handedly on defense win a game for you. He is a beast. Yeah, he is. So watch out for him. That's Woods on Sports. So we would be remiss if we did not mention to you what happened yesterday in.
There was a shooting in Connecticut that was giant news. It was the biggest news yesterday by far. What happened? Basically, there was this truck driver who was caught stealing beer from the Connecticut warehouse where he worked. And when he was caught on the surveillance camera, they were like, look, here's proof that you've done this. He went on a shooting rampage yesterday morning. Yeah, he killed eight people before he committed suicide. His name was Omar Thornton. Before he shot himself, he killed his mom and apparently said... Terrible. He apparently said that I killed five... This is a quote that he said. I killed the five racists that was there that was bothering me. Oh, my. Yeah. And his girlfriend at the time says that, yeah, he has complained about racism there. He was an African-American guy. But... All of these people that he killed apparently never spoke to him, never knew him, never any complaints, nothing. That's terrible. Yeah, so nine people killed in the Connecticut shooting, himself included. No sense. Want to let people know that we do something called Word of the Day. Now, today, what you stand to win are Charger tickets, Chargers Bears. Yep. Okay? The Word of the Day is biceps.
You're listening for the word biceps, but you're listening for us to work it into a sentence. Okay, so when you hear us work it into a sentence, caller number nine at 570-1949 will win Charger Bear tickets. So yeah, just want to let you know about it. When we come back, the panel hit on a couple of big things out there, including the sex ads on Craigslist. Played a little Eminem a second ago. I thought it was kind of funny hearing the audio of Eminem talk about what he's afraid of. Never heard this. Heard people be afraid of a lot of things. Gavin Rossdale. I interviewed Gavin Rossdale one time from Bush. He's afraid of birds. It scares me because they flutter around in the wings and a fluttering sound. But this one that he says, never heard this one. One of them, he gives two things. One of them spiders, the other one's weird. We'll tell you. Come on back. People are going to like this. The Mikey Show. It's a good time.
You know what I mean? Call 570-1949 or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Silver Sun Pickups, Saturday, August 7th. So much. Silver Sun Pickups, Saturday, August 7th. Soma, 3350 Sports Arena Boulevard. Soma is an all-ages venue. Tickets are on sale now at the Soma box office or go to Ticketmaster.com. Silver Sun Pickups, Saturday, August 7th. When a dog sticks his head out the car window, it's an expression of freedom and sheer joy. At Navy Federal, we want you to have that same exuberance when buying a car. So we created the Power Auto Loan to give our members amazingly low rates, affordable payments, and easy, fast approvals. Talk about man's best friend. Navy Federal. We serve where you serve. Right now, Navy Federal is offering rates as low as 1.99% APR on new cars. To find out what you can save, visit NavyFederal.org or call 24-7. Rates based on credit worthiness, so your rate may differ. Everyone is sharing information and personal experiences with their friends on Facebook. Whether it's a great recipe or a bad book, a special travel tip, or a not-so-spectacular date.
Some of the most shared experiences on Facebook are about hair care. And Ovation Cell Therapy is getting shared with a lot of friends on Facebook. Here's what Sharon has shared with her Facebook friends. For those who ask, Ovation is worth every penny. Between the coloring, the flat ironing, and the meds I have to take, my ear was falling out by the handfuls. I've been using Ovation for months now, and what a change. My stylist says my hair has never been healthier. Thanks, Ovation. Facebook friends love sharing their Ovation cell therapy stories of thicker, stronger, longer, and healthier hair. Find out how easy it is at OvationHair.com. Enter FM 94.9 at checkout for a special introductory offer. your hair can be healthy again. Guaranteed at OvationHair.com. And remember to enter FM 94.9 for your special offer. OvationHair.com. Ford's model year sales event is going on now. Time to get an incredible clearance price on a new Ford Edge. A crossover with the spirit of a sports car and the versatility of an SUV. With a powerful 265 horsepower engine and full flat rear seats.
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It's the Bridal Bazaar. I love it. There's so many choices, and I love to have lots of choices. I mean, I kind of have an idea of what I want, but there's so many choices here. It's really awesome. I like what I'm seeing here. There's a lot of variety and kind of where I'm getting a lot of ideas. It's so much easier to have everything in one spot and to be able to see what you actually like. At the Bridal Bazaar, you'll find everything you need to plan the wedding of your dreams, all in one place, all on one day. There's just so many vendors to choose from, from everything from flowers to invitations. Cakes, definitely. I'm full from all the tasting. The dresses were gorgeous. Chocolate fountains and everything that you could possibly imagine. It's kind of a collaboration of ideas that's coming together. It's got to be a perfect day. Plus, you can register to win a pair of diamond earrings from John Franklin Jewelers. The Bridal Bazaar. Sunday, August 8th at the San Diego Convention Center. Tickets and discount coupons at bridalbazaar.com. Definitely go to the Bridal Bazaar because it's all you need. Have you heard? Proactive is new and better than ever. Stay tuned for a million bottle giveaway announcement. Do you have troubled skin, acne? Well, we have great news. With New Proactiv, your acne can heal and you can prevent new breakouts from happening. Be one of the first to try it by giving us a call at 1-800-277-1134. Because we're going to let a million people try New Proactiv risk-free and also receive our legendary refining mask and green tea moisturizer free if you call right now.
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Things starting to get just a little busier this morning in Balboa Avenue eastbound at the 15. We've got a disabled big rig that's partially blocking that right lane. They do have assistance on the way. CHP is going to be covering this. This report is brought to you by REMAX. If you're looking to buy or sell a home, having the right agent is more important than ever. REMAX agents know their markets. They care enough to get to know you, too. Outstanding agents, outstanding results. Also, it looks like we've got some issues here on the 8 eastbound Crestwood Road, a traffic problem. running across the roadway. They still have a backup in this area due to this guy. The 78 eastbound at El Camino Real, there is cones in the middle lanes. CHP is going to run a traffic break to remove those. This report, it is also brought to you this morning by Quiznos. Brought to you by Quiznos 543 Value Menu. Get a great lunch for $5, $4, or $3. Quiznos. Toasty. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego. Lincoln Financial Radio Station. And now back to the Mikey Show. With Mikey. My name is Mikey, and I did not graduate from high school. Lauren. I have to admit, I like partying in the USA. Woods. I don't like being alone. I don't like going places alone. Sienna. I like Nickelback. And Jay. I'm so tired. On FM 94.9. Mikey shows myself, Woodsy, Lauren O'Brien, Sienna, and Jay. We got a phone screener named Chris. It's Grounds. Grounds.
Word of the day today, by the way, is biceps. And you're waiting for us to work that into a sentence. And it could happen at any time during commercials. It could happen at any time during the show between now and the end of the show. When you hear it, call us and you get charger tickets. You get charger tickets. I can't believe that. Charger bear tickets. And maybe you take the kid with you. Yeah. Since I've never been. You're going to love it. I can't wait. Yeah, when you hear that word, call our number 95701949. And don't forget, it's 730 this morning. I will be telling you what Woods did. Oh, boy. And you will get to decide whether or not. That's okay. We're not okay. And something's going to tell me that Mikey doesn't think it's okay. Why else would he be bringing it up? Something just tells me. I will only say that I found it questionable. Yeah, no kidding. Weird. Questionable. Majority of things. Suspicious, maybe. Something looks suspicious. So we'll tell you all about it in a bit. The panel is myself, Woodsy, and Lauren O'Brien. What we do is.
We bring up various topics of the day and get our take on it. We've got 20 seconds to discuss. And you know what? You can feel free to chime in on it, too. First one is Craigslist is taking some heat right now. They are. According to police and anti-trafficking advocates, the Internet has now become the preferred way to sell women for sex. And Craigslist is one of the... Are we talking prostitution? Is that what we mean? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. And Craigslist is one of the biggest websites, you know, people go to to buy things, sex included, apparently. It's fast and convenient, Craigslist, and people are not happy about it. And so advocate groups are starting. Yeah, they're starting problems. You know, Craig. Whatever his last name is from Craig's list. There's actually a Craig's list. Oh, no. I saw his name in this article, and I was like, oh, my gosh, there's actually a Craig. Yeah, there really is, I think. I think there really is a Craig that started it. Yeah, I can't find his name. Darn it. Craig Neisman. Craig Neisman. Craig Neisman. That's your trail. Estrella. Estrella. Estrella. Estrella. Estrella is his last name. So, okay. Craig Neumark.
Craig Newmark. Thank you. Sorry, I had to find it. Woods, what's your take on this? Oh, man, you know, it's illegal, right? Prostitution's illegal? It's illegal. Yeah, I mean, then you can't do it, can you? Did you just say prostitution is illegal, isn't it? Isn't it? Yes. Yeah. It is. Yeah. Well, then you shouldn't be doing it. It's not like they're saying on there, though, like, oh, come find a prostitute. They're saying adult services. Right. Nothing wrong with a few adult services, but now you get them from your old lady. Lauren O'Brien. I mean, I guess if the police or the authorities are now aware of it, then maybe they start somehow trafficking it, following up on these adult situations just the way they would any other weed that they're trying to crack down on prostitution. Yeah. Well, you know, I don't know if you guys remember the Craigslist killer in Boston. That's what he was doing. Finding a prostitute. Now, I've always said, I still believe that we are, in terms of the internet, in the days of the wild, wild west. This is the beginning days. This is old west. Eventually, they'll figure it out and they'll go, oh, yeah, it's a community. They have to figure out it's a community. It's more than just Craigslist that's doing this online, but Craigslist is such a huge site that they're taking a lot of heat. And, well, A.
Prostitution is illegal, so it should be stopped. And B, it's also dangerous. Why when I go on Craigslist, like if I look for concert tickets, why when I type in Craigslist do I feel like a giant creeper? Really? I don't know. I just do. I've never used Craigslist. What? I've never been to Craigslist. I don't know what Craigslist looks like. You know why? It's because I'm a 40-year-old guy. If you took a look at me, you would think, oh. Yeah, you know, he's got tattoos, blah, blah, blah. I'm, like, petrified of Craigslist. What? I'll tell you. There's nothing to be scared of. You know why I'm afraid is because I think I'll get, like, mugged. You know, like, if I'm selling golf clubs, the guy will be like, yeah, why don't you meet me at blah, blah, blah. And then I take the golf clubs, and as soon as I get there, he's, you know, standing, he's like, hey, I brought $250 to your clubs, blah, blah. I got this van and it's kind of hard to put the clubs in the van by myself. Hey, by the way, we're about a size 38. See, I feel like that now, but when I first moved here from the East Coast, I was like a Craigslist spokesperson. Really? Oh my gosh, I got this on Craigslist, this and this and this. Did you go? I used to go by myself places. I know. Now I'm older and wiser. The idea of just like calling, of somebody calling me.
First of all, scares me. Hard mark. Well, we did it all over email. That some person would call. You did it by email. You get your throat slit real good, dude. Be careful. Did you have a fake email account? No. So you just used your email? I didn't overthink it. No. We sell stuff on there all the time. Yeah. It's like a garage sale. Yeah. It's like a virtual garage sale. It's nice. Where do you go meet them, Jay? I don't. I give them my address and they come to my house and they buy the item. Holy. My God, dude. Really? Really? A guy came to our house recently. Yeah. You did? Yeah, he got a lawnmower. And they came to your house? Yeah, it was the best deal ever. Todd found it, guy dropped it off at our house, and he's gone. What's the difference in that and somebody just putting their finger in a phone book going, that's the guy right there? Chances are a lot greater in the favor when you give them your address and say, hi, I'm Jay Isbell. Come to my home. Yeah. Maybe meet at a Chevron. What would stop them? What if they just went knocked on a door? Yeah, dude, you can't stop that. You can stop this. Yeah. See, I'm not living in your paranoid world. And you know what? I appreciate that so much about Jay because Jay, when it comes to, like, fear, Jay doesn't really live in that world. I know. I don't really either, but I'm not going to give somebody my home address and be like, just come to the crib. I've been to plenty of people's homes. I found, like, a couple babysitting jobs off of there. People trust me with their kids off of Craigslist.
Yeah, I don't think I would give my child to someone on Craigslist. Wow. I just don't want to live in fear. I just want to live, you know. But I don't think that's living in fear. How do you balance that with knowing that you live in a creepy world with creepy people? Right. Well, I just, I wouldn't meet him in a dark alley, but at my home where it's okay, I'm not liking what you're doing, shut the door. Yeah. It's like, get. Now they know where you live and slit your throat. Yeah, really. But why would they want Jay of all people? Yeah, what makes me so special? Yeah, because he's got a... a Weber grill for sale. I get it. Now that kind of makes sense. Like, well, okay, I'm thinking this through and I'm going to my, I'm thinking to myself, if it's a guy calling a guy, it doesn't creep me out as much, but a girl, what if a guy's looking, you know, he's like, Hey, maybe a girl will want to buy this and I'll get her a dress and come to her house. Well, yeah. And LAB, you come to the door, Sienna comes to the door. He's not going to be like, Oh, what a pig. He's going to be like, Oh, geez. He's going to probably try to work a lead somehow. You know what I mean? Knowing dudes. Well, the older I get, the more paranoid I'm becoming. So when I sold all my stuff in my old apartment, I wouldn't ever let anyone come over when it was just me. Yeah. I'm even, listen, I'll tell you how freaked out it makes me. I'm even thinking, well, what if I go meet the guy somewhere and it's a hold up? Because, you know. Why wouldn't he just hold up a guy, a random guy at a gas station? Why would he have an email paper? Because he's going shopping. He goes on Craigslist and he's like, hmm, what do I want?
He's like, ooh, this looks good at an Xbox 360. Oh, I want one. It's a free Xbox 360. But it's traceable now. You could be like, this guy emailed me, and using someone's email address, you get their IP address. Yeah. Find out where they are, you know? There's a million ways around it, man. There's a million. If guys want to be shady, they can be shady. It's just for me. You're not going to have, like, MacGyver find you on Craigslist. I would do it. I'd meet him at a Chevron. I'd be like, yeah, dude. And then he'd be like, this guy that emailed me helped me up at gunpoint. Check the surveillance tape. Check his IP address. No, no, no. I'm saying, like, I would buy a guitar. I have bought a guitar off Craigslist. You know what I did? I said, this is where I work. Come to my office. I'll meet you at my lunch break. Really? That sounds good. That sounds good. But now they know where you work, so they can find you there. Yeah, but that's better than... Yeah, me and 300 other people. They can watch the parking lot. Oh, they're going to watch the parking lot. I like where I work. It makes me feel safe. Absolutely. Jay's scaring me so bad. Okay, creepy. Come to find me at work. It's 6 o'clock. M1 Ryan from Oceanside is calling about Craigslist. What's up? Hey, how you doing, Mikey? Good. Yeah, well, my Craigslist story, one time I had sold some DVDs on Craigslist, and the guy who came to pick them up, he was so creepy. The whole time he was in there, he was just giving me a bad vibe all around, and I sell a lot of stuff on Craigslist from that point on.
Every time I sell something on Craigslist and they come to me to pick it up, it might be a large item or something. Actually, I have a gun either on me or very close within reach. Let me come and look at stuff in my house. Oh, wow. See, I found, I did look for roommates. I let strangers come see where I live and know that. I was living alone a couple of years ago. And I found when I came back from traveling, when I came back from Australia, I needed a place to live. I moved in with two strangers off of Craigslist. Oh, boy. Oh. Yeah? Yeah, no thanks. No. Maybe thinking. So, Ryan, when dude came to look at the DVDs, he came into your house. Oh, it was about 200 DVDs. So, yes, he had to come in the house and he wanted to look at the whole stack of them and everything. And he just looks like one of them shifty individuals. He was acting just out of a normal. He was, you know, just real fidgety, like real sweaty. He gave me a bad vibe. And I was like, you know what? Never again. Did he buy it? Did he buy him? Oh, he bought him. Definitely. You know, it turned out nothing bad. But from that point on, I just don't trust it. Still creeped you out. Yeah. Just don't trust it. Yeah, man. What about when you're renting an apartment and you go and see a place? How do you know that that person's not going to look? You don't. You don't. But like.
That's, it's different because you're inviting. Maybe just leave your door open. Imagine the poor person that goes to his house and went Ryan's house to pick up like a chair. Yeah. And Ryan answers the door with a gun. He's like, oh my God. I just, I sent you an email about a chair. I don't want a chair at all. I'll come back here and rough talking and run him off. Like, I'm just trying to do business with you, man. Hey, bro, I just wanted a chair. Okay, so the next thing, and you can call about that, 5701-949. Next thing on the panel is San Diegans and the relationship that San Diegans have with the Geezer Bandit. Sienna just gave me that guilty look and she's like, guilty as charged. I know. Well, you know, of course there are the people that are right and they're... not loving the Geezer Bandit because he's struck 11 banks this year. He hasn't robbed a bank since June, but people are fans of the Geezer Bandit. There's Facebook pages with over 1,500 fans. Some people on the Facebook pages are offering prayers and support for him. Prayers. I know. Some want to hear from him. I mean, it's a little bit nuts. They're calling him Bonnie and Clyde and people like that.
That are bad, but you kind of like. Right. John Dillinger. Yeah. Yeah. Pretty Boy Floyd, it says. Tony Soprano. I love Tony Soprano. Yeah. And they're basically putting the Geezer Bandit in that category now. What is your take? It's weird, man, because I'm not so much a fan of the Geezer Bandit. And I know Tony Soprano is just a character. But, like, when I see him knocking off a truck, I'm like, yes, go get him. I don't know why we have that to, like, root for. who is essentially kind of a dirtbag, a thief, you know what I mean? But I know that I am definitely guilty of it sometimes. L-O-B. I'm not, like, sitting over here rooting for him, but I'm not mad at him. I think it's pretty cool. Sorry about that. It just happened in my head. Might use strumming chords. If he's indeed not a senior citizen, whoever this guy is, you've got to hand it to him. He's pretty clever. I don't think he's a senior citizen. Eleven robberies. I think he has a mask on. Yeah, you guys know my take. I despise it. It's crime. And the guy's a criminal, and he's robbing banks, and he's doing it with a gun. Allegedly. He's allegedly doing it with a gun? Could be a fake gun. Could be a fake gun. But he's got a weapon. He shows a weapon. You guys know me, man? It's crime. I don't like it. I don't like that the guy's robbing banks. I'm not for the bad guy. How about this one, man? Wyclef Jean.
Is considering running for president of Haiti. He's actually filled out the paperwork, Mike. Really? And he's going to be making the announcement tomorrow night with Larry King. Really? Yeah. He's from Haiti, just in case you didn't know. And he's one of the biggest, like, outspoken proponents of Haiti. He has a foundation to raise money for them. You know, obviously, Haiti's been through a lot right now. But he wants to run for president. He was born there. Well, then he can. Woodsy, what'd you take? I was touched. I really was. When I read that, I was happy for him, for them. He's going to bring a lot of good attention, I think, to that very strange, underdeveloped country down there, man. And I just thought, I was really touched when I read that. I thought it was very cool. L.O.B.? I agree. I've been listening to the Fugees for a while. I'm from New Jersey, and that's where... They started and he's always been talking about, you know, his roots to Haiti and always been such a an advocate for, you know, bringing attention to that area. So I think Woods is right. I mean, spot on. He's going to bring so much positive attention and hopefully get him the help that they need. Yeah, I'm all for it. We have an actor as our governor. Yeah. Why can't the lead singer of the Fugees be the president of Haiti? Ronald Reagan. Ronald Reagan. Best president.
The United States of America has ever seen. Hands down. Hands down. Ronald Reagan. The best president we've ever had. Was an actor. Was an actor. So, yeah, listen. I'm all for it. Let's see. 7.30 this morning. It's about 12 minutes away. I'm telling you all about Woodsy. And we'll see what your take is on this. And we'll ask you, have you ever done this? Woodsy doesn't know what it is. Which I really like. We'll talk about it. Tell you all about it. Eminem. What is Eminem afraid of? I'm so excited. Well, one of them is spiders, which is, you know, lots of people are afraid of spiders. I hear you. Right? Is it something that we could guess? Guess. Dolls. Nope. Clowns. Everybody's afraid of clowns. And I won't tell you, by the way. If you say it, I won't tell you. Okay. But let me hear your guesses. Fungus. Keep guessing. Ooh, yeah, like mold or something like that. Things you're afraid of?
Spider webs? No, that goes with spiders. Anything else? Tennis shoes. Here we go. Anything that I am afraid of? Eight-legged insects. Spiders. Giraffes. Giraffes. Listen. I have a weird thing with giraffes, man. I don't like their necks. I don't like their necks. Oh, my gosh. I don't like their necks. I don't like their necks. He's afraid of giraffes because he doesn't like their necks. It's weird. I just fell more in love with them. I know, me too. Did you because it's so strange and it's so odd? So quirky. So quirky? I love giraffes, though. They're my favorite. Oh, dude, they're amazing. I've never heard of anybody being afraid of a giraffe. Like, would a giraffe run after you? I'd be afraid, like, if I was in a pen with them by myself because they're huge, but I wouldn't, like, drive by them on the bus and go, ooh. I've seen people feed them and pet them at the wild animal park and stuff, and that freaks me out. I'm like, whoa. There's nothing cuter than a baby giraffe. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, they're really cute. By the way, I wanted to answer this because people asked me about this on Facebook, and I wanted to answer what it was.
A while back, a couple of weeks ago, my dad was having surgery. My mom and I were sitting in the waiting room at the hospital and I had Facebook something about how I had a very awkward moment sitting next to my mom because the television was on in the waiting room and there was an inappropriate moment on the television. If you have little ears in the car, I will tell you right now, I'm going to tell you what was said. I just need you to know that this is kind of adult. Maybe turn down the radio for one second. We're not a little kid show, though. We're a show for adults. This isn't dirty, necessarily. It's just adult content. I hope Captain Buzzkill doesn't call in again. I hope he doesn't. Me too. But I'm sitting there with my mom, and it's a room full. I mean, the waiting room was full, and everybody was watching the TV. That's what you do when you're sitting in there. And it was an episode of Law and Order, maybe? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's Law and Order Special Victims Unit. And the guy, they find this body or whatever, and the lead detective says, everybody's having fun until, what's the line? It's all fun and games. It's all fun and games. He goes, it's all fun and games until somebody loses a penis. Oh, boy.
It is always fun until then. And I go and I'm sitting next to my mom. Oh, boy. And my mom awkwardly goes. Oh, my God. And everybody in there kind of awkwardly goes. That's a weird line. It was. Well, yeah. And it was. I don't know what the deal, but it was so, so. That is awkward. So. Freaking strange. It's even worse that there was, you know, other strangers around too. And you're like, oh, how do I deal with this? Yeah, not only is it awkward because I'm sitting next to my mom, it's now awkward because I'm sitting next to a bunch of strangers. And we all heard something awkward. And who knows why it was even on Law & Order Special Victims Unit in the hospital. Like, you would think it would be a more sort of vanilla channel, you know? I don't know what channel. Maybe Canadian Parliament. They put on C-SPAN or something. Maybe the news. Maybe CNN. I can guarantee everyone has those moments with their parents all the time. I had it with my kids. Oh, yeah. CJ's got four kids. We were watching this movie called Away We Go. And in the very first scene, we're all sat down to watch this movie. I had no idea. He's doing something to her. And he looks up at her and says...
You taste. Oh, I saw that. You taste. And I was like, oh. And he figured out she was pregnant from the way she was. And you were with your kids. And my kids were all sitting right there. I'm like, oh, my gosh. I've got a great one. And this is one me and my brother, we actually, we knew it was coming. And we were all at the lake. It was my brother, his wife, me and my wife, Jamie, and my parents. And you know the movie Fear with Mark Wahlberg? Oh, yeah. Yeah, but I don't want any more descriptions. It won't be descriptive like that. Trust me. Okay. Well, there's a scene where they get on the roller coaster and he puts his hand somewhere. And that's all I'm going to say. Yeah. Okay. And it's a whole, she's like an ecstasy. And my brother and I knew. Remember I was just saying. I didn't describe anything. Yeah. That would qualify, I think, as a description of what they were doing. Maybe. So my brother and I knew it was coming. So my brother looks at me and he goes. It was three, two minutes before it started. He goes, do you want to have a smoke? I go, yeah, sure. And we ran outside. And so it was my sister-in-law and my wife in there with your mom and dad. We left him on purpose. I got back. She's like, I'm going to kill you.
Oh, my God. Team Woods, huh? Team Woods, yeah, not that night. When I was in high school, my dad loves the movie Clockwork Orange. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, it's like one of his favorite movies. And so he's like, oh, let's put Clockwork Orange. Oh, my gosh. He knew what the movie's about. I didn't. And I'm sitting there, I was like, okay, later, Dad. How old? 14. Oh, my gosh. Oh, boy. 14. Oh, my gosh. I cannot imagine watching A Clockwork Orange. Listen. I laughed at his face. I was like, God, you're nuts. I'm leaving. I feel the age to see A Clockwork Orange is 72. It must be 72 to see A Clockwork Orange. That's when you're mentally prepared for that movie. If ever. I still have never seen the whole thing. When I was about 10 or 11, I mowed lawns to earn enough money to take my parents to the movie. It was a goal of mine. I want to take my parents to the movie. Sweet kid. Oh, yeah. So I mowed all these lawns. Weird. And earned enough money to take my parents to the movie. For two adults and one child, it was $10.50. Wow. Sure. For two adults and one. Back in my day. Back in my day. Good old days. And we went to see the movie Quest for Fire. Now.
Many of you probably are not familiar with it, but Quest for Fire was about the dawn of man and apparently the dawn of lovemaking. And that was a very, very awkward 45 seconds or so, maybe longer, minute and a half. Seemed like a week. Seemed like a week and a half. At least it was the two of them there, though. It's worse when it's just one of them. You're like, oh, oh, oh. See, I used to watch, when I was in high school, every Sunday, watch The Sopranos with my dad. It's like, you'd think I would learn my lesson after a couple awkward. And every episode, there was a guaranteed, like, five awkward moments. And my dad, when he's, like, uncomfortable, he'll stretch or pretend that, like, one of his joints is really tight. So he was doing like a whole, he'd be like, oh, geez, and like work it out. How about when you're watching football and they have a million of those Viagra commercials? Yeah. You're sitting there with your dad? Viagra commercials are embarrassing. Is that even okay for like a son to be sitting with his dad? It's never okay. It's not. Nobody says anything. You just stare. See, I glance over and do glances. I'm like, oh boy. Oh, we're at a dip. I'll be right back. I'm going to get some more chips, Dad. Yeah. My grandfather took my little brother. Do you remember the movie, Mike, called Blame It on Rio?
I remember the name, but I don't remember it. The name, but just filthy. Filthy. And my grandfather thought it was a war movie. Oh, my God. Took my brother, who was five at the time. Oh, wow. My brother was like, whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo. Oh, my God. They stayed like 30 minutes and had to leave. That's all my brother talked about. Oh, my gosh. Loved it. I love it. Yeah, I loved it. So bad. So, want to know what Woods did? Yes. Yes. Tell you what Woods did when we come back. Now's our chance. Let's do it. More from the Mikey Show coming up. Be a part of the show. I don't think it's that simple. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm beginning to like the sound of that. FM 94.9. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Miller Lite and Scion. On the main stage. Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros. The Rogue Wave. Put your number solitaire. The Wigs. The Delta Spirit. On the Casbah Local 94.9 stage. The Nervous Records. The Silent Comedy. The Burning of Rome. And White Apple Tree. Get your tickets for $30 today. No service fees or extra charges at FM949SD.com or IndependenceJam.com.
Plus a dollar goes to the About the Music Fund, which helps to support music education in San Diego County Public Schools. Eat bands at the beach. Get tickets and join the party. August 29th in Oceanside. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Honest T. Listen up, San Diego. Prospect Bar & Grill brings you Prospect Live. San Diego's Thursday night spot for open mic and live music. This is your chance to show San Diego what you've got. Open mic sign-ups at 9 p.m. Thursday, August 5th. Prospect Live features the Chula Vista Soldier Club and DJ Chuck Prada and drummer Harley Wright in the mix. $3 Dos Equis and $5 You Call It's All Night. The Chula Vista Soldier Club this Thursday night at Prospect Bar & Grill. Located at 1025 Prospect Street, upstairs next to Sushi on the Rock. For more info, go to prospectbar.com. This is a bar flight promotion. Only available at knots.com. Woodsy's peepers are the best.
My baby browns. You can see them again. That's right. Please don't ever call those peepers again. Oh, come on. Those little peepers. You know, last night, you know, I'm going out of town today and I was at the drugstore and I was buying a bunch of stuff, you know, to take on the plane. And I go, oh, wow. You know what I don't have to buy? Tiny little contact solution. You know what I don't have to worry about? Finding contacts to take with me in case I lose some. None of that anymore. None. Because I got LASIK at Clearview Eye and Medical Laser Center. Went in, talked to Dr. Sandy T. Feldman. She is a pro. Makes you feel so comfortable, man. And, you know, for a guy that was a little bit nervous about having his eyes worked on, literally the best move I've ever made, the best money I ever spent. Very excited to travel without glasses or contacts for my first time today. That's rad. And when I fly in Saturday and I will grab my surfboard and go to the beach and I won't have to worry about one single thing. Don't even have to stop to put my contacts in. Playing baseball better? Yep. Hitting the ball. Everything. Everything is coming together. So call them, 858-452-3937. Tell them Woods sent you. They will work with you on the procedure, and they will work with you on the financing. They have 0% interest financing available. Just go see them. They'll give you a VIP consultation. Go to clearvieweyes.com. You tell them Woods sent you. Signs that say this is not an exit don't apply to him.
His two cents have overruled Supreme Court decisions. If he rode in your car, its resale value would instantly increase. He likes the word fog. Were you to pass him on the street and he didn't see you, you would still feel like he said hello and asked you about your day. If you were stuck in an elevator with him, you wouldn't want to be saved. Even his treehouses have finished basements. His business card just says, I'll call you. Interesting man in the world. Don't always drink beer. But when I do, for Dos Equis. Enjoy Dos Equis responsibly. Imported by Cervezas Mexicanas, White Plains, New York. Stay thirsty, my friend. AT&T presents Last Will and Testament for a Monday morning. To my dear snooze button, I leave 15 minutes of my morning. To my misplaced car keys, I leave 13 minutes. To the rubberneckers, slowing down to check out an overheated radiator.
I leave 45 minutes. To the office parking lot, now packed because I'm late, I leave 12 minutes. And to my work email box, frantically checked as I trot through the office lobby, I leave whatever measly seconds are left over. Don't lose another second. Go online and download at blazing fast speeds. The fastest 3G network in San Diego and across the nation. AT&T. Rethink. Possible. Come in now and buy a new HTC Aria for $129.99 after mail-in rebate. Pay due $29.99 and receive a $100 AT&T promotion card, two-year wireless service agreement with voice plan and minimum $15 monthly data plan required. 3G not available in all areas, certain geographic, other monthly charges and restrictions apply. See store for details. Have you heard? Proactiv is new and better than ever. Stay tuned for a million bottle giveaway announcement. Do you have troubled skin, acne? Well, we have great news. With New Proactiv, your acne can heal and you can prevent new breakouts from happening. Be one of the first to try it by giving us a call at 1-800-277-1134. Because we're going to let a million people try New Proactiv risk-free and also receive our legendary refining mask and green tea moisturizer free if you call right now.
You've heard it. Be one of the first to try new and better than ever proactive solution. You'll receive a 60-day risk-free trial, plus a free refining mask and green tea moisturizer. Call 1-800-277-1134. This is our best radio offer ever. Get your risk-free 60-day trial of new proactive plus two free extras. Show acne who's boss. Be proactive. Call 1-800-277-1134. That's 1-800-277-1134. Okay, let me guess. I'd like to turn myself in, officer. You can't turn yourself in on the side of the road, sir. But I got this Mini Cooper with three years or 36,000 miles of no-cost maintenance and six airbags, and I only paid $19,500. That's not a crime, sir. But it also came with 36,000 miles. which I just withheld from you. Congratulations. I've made a mockery. Okay, move it along. The Mini Cooper. It's a steal, but it's not stolen. Right now, it leaves a Mini Cooper hardtop for $199 a month for 39 months, now through August 31st. For details, visit miniusa.com slash info. MSRP includes destination handling, excludes license registration, taxes, and options. Rolling Stone says My Morning Jacket is fast becoming one of the premier live bands on the planet. It's a very special evening with My Morning Jacket and special guest, Avi Buffalo.
August 11th at SDSU Open Air Theater. Get tickets now at LiveNation.com, Ticketmaster, or call 800-745-3000. This report is brought to you by your San Diego Chargers. They need you to lead the charge. Charge your single game tickets on sale right now. Call 1-800-745-3000. Or you could go online at chargers.com. 54 westbound at the 805. Somebody lost their car battery. It's in the left lane of the transition ramp. CHP is on the way to clear it. That's kind of tough. Your battery just falls out of your car. On the 8 westbound before Fairmount Avenue, a disabled truck. It's in the center divider. The driver's outside of the car. Be careful. You don't want to run them over. And an Encinitas on the 5 southbound between La Costa Avenue, Santa Fe Drive. Just a little slow. This report is brought to you by Hone Audi Carlsbad. If you've been thinking about a new... Audi. Stop by Hone Audi Carlsbad. Drive home a deal today. Hone Audi Carlsbad, part of the Hone family of dealerships. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. What's happening? This is Bird from Dragon Eyewear with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Wednesday morning. Being brought to you by Guayaki Urbamate. Under overcast, guys, we've got...
A little bit of swell out there, just some weak southwesterly pulses being joined by just a bit of a wind swell from yesterday's stronger northwest direction. Small surf running in that neat away side zone on average, chest tight, some of the more open combination spots. Standout area still facing that southwest swell direction, might even see a few shoulder high sets on an occasion, but definitely inconsistent to be sure. Sunshine should burn through quicker, should be another nice day today. Water temperature still hovering in the kind of lower 62 to 64 degree range. Beach breaks look fairly fun right now, even though they're small. There is enough crosses to small so that they're not that walled out. Top south spots look fun, too, and lower tides could help those reef breaks out as well. So it looks like there could be some fun ways to be had. For up-to-the-minute surf reports and forecasts, go to surfline.com. And for everything you need in order to go surf, check out one of South Coast Surf Shops at five locations or go online at southcoast.com. This surf report is brought to you by Guayaquil Urba Mate. and it can only be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. With Mikey. I am chubby. Lauren. I have a very sophisticated palate. Oh, really? I do a lot of things I shouldn't do. Sienna. I go on long walks. And Jay. I just got reminded of the worst haircut ever that I had. I forgot about. I had the rat tail. On FM 94.9.
Welcome back to the Mikey Show. I'll be telling you what Woodsy did the other day and see what you think of it. Don't forget the word of the day is biceps. When you hear that word worked into a sentence, caller number 9 at 570-1949 is going to win. Chargers. Bears. Tickets. Sienna, what's going on in news? This morning, just after 6 a.m., a small plane crashed in Phoenix, Arizona, right by Deer Valley Airport, the airport over there, and it crashed into a building, a citywide pest control building, which is right next to the runway. Apparently, the plane was trying to land and it didn't work out very well. But there's a single-engine plane, seats four people.
More information will be coming out about that. Also, we talked about this yesterday. The plans for an Islamic center and mosque near Ground Zero has been approved. Really? Yeah. They were trying to get landmark status instead. And the panel denied landmark status. And it looks like it's going to be an Islamic center and mosque. Meaning that they were trying to determine that the building was a landmark and that they couldn't tear it down. Well, sorry, they're going to. Right. So it was denied. And now a mosque will be going in two blocks from Ground Zero. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, the reports are out now. You know, Brett Favre may come back. He won't come back. They said he's retiring. Well, now it's come out that the Vikings will offer him $20 million. $20 million. I'd said it. Just saw it. $20 million. Do you think that will change his mind? I don't know. What do you do? How do you say no to $20 million? See, in my opinion, it was like... Yeah, from $20, he'll probably still decide to come back. Yeah, exactly. And then also the NBA schedule has been released. The Heat with, you know, the new power threesome they have down there. They're opening the season against the Boston Celtics. They'll be playing the Lakers on Christmas, and they will be playing in Cleveland. Oh, my. I'd be scared for my life if I was LeBron Jenkins. Wow. Yeah. I think I'm setting my DVR now. I know, yeah.
Okay, so ready to know what Woods did the other day? Yeah, we're fascinated. Now, I want to know if people do this and what people think about it, and is it unscrupulous? Probably, because it's me. You're going to know exactly what it is as soon as I tell you what we did. Tell me what we did. Woodsy and I ran into Henry's, and while we were in Henry's... Oh, boy, you make a big deal out of this? Really? While we were in Henry's... Woodsy decided that he wanted to sample. And apparently he doesn't know what chocolate-covered raisins taste like. And so he wanted to know what these chocolate-covered raisins taste like. Apparently he didn't know what chocolate-covered peanuts taste like either because he just wanted to make sure that they were of the quality. He reached his hand in there. Yeah, he was taking samples. He's grazing. He's grazing. Did you reach your hand in or did you use a scooper? No, I picked. I didn't scoop. I picked. Nothing wrong with that. And I go, what are you doing? And he goes, I'm sampling, pal. Why don't you keep your eyes on your own paper? And I go, you're sampling? And he goes, yeah. And I go, do you mean sampling like to find out what it tastes like? And he goes, exactly. Are they fresh? Yeah. What's wrong with that?
What, am I going to pay a nickel? I have no problems with sampling. Okay. If... If the sample lady's out with sample cups. If you're at Costco. I love that lady. Me too. Who doesn't love that lady? Oh, sample lady. But I think I'm okay with a sample. If... Got to put the if in there. If you're really like... I don't know what that is, and I'm not sure if I'm going to like that and blah, blah, blah. And it's a bulk item, you know? Isn't there, every time you buy a new item off the shelf in its packaging, don't you always run the risk? I might not like this. Yes. Yes. Yeah, but that's sealed. It's sealed, number one. Number two, those... Our sample bins. Those are sample bins. Just because we can get to it doesn't mean that it's okay. So you've never grabbed a grape? Oh, no, no, no, no. Oh, a grape? Uh-uh. No way. We gotta wash those. Yeah, I gotta wash my fruit. But, like, I used to go any, like, place that had bulk. But that's the thing. With Matt, when I was dating Matt, he...
He does a sample bit. He'll sample anything he wants. And I would be like, where'd you get that? You can't do that. Go give me one. Yeah, exactly. You just didn't want to do it. I couldn't ever pull the trigger, but I'd be like, give me one. Never have you done that? Because I would think, now, a couple things go off in my mind from childhood, okay? Okay. One time I got a pretty solid whooping because I got borrowed money. from a Marine while we were staying at the Marine base, borrowed money from a Marine to buy a soda. And my dad was like, you don't go around asking strangers for money. He's a stranger? Stranger. I didn't know who he was. How old were you? Six or something. I'll never see you again, but can I borrow this real quick? Yeah, I said, can I have 25 cents or 50 cents or whatever? Panhandler. Panhandler. Yeah, panhandler.
And Ben Pillager. Sample taker. Sample raper. Yes. That's what he is. And so I'm like. It freaks me out. Like, to me, I'm like, I can't. That's totally different. I'm not allowed. I'm not allowed. I'm not allowed. I'm not allowed. Well, I mean, technically, it is. It's stealing. It isn't it? There's no two ways about it. No. Technically. All right, question. Technically. Question. I'm going to go to the movie. I'm going to refer to the movie Office Space. for my argument. What if you're in 7-Eleven? And I need people to call 570-1949 and know what you think. What about the tray, dude, with the pennies and stuff? What if you find a penny on the ground, you need a penny? That's finders keepers. Yeah, if you find a penny on the ground, I think you find a penny on the ground. What about the tray? That's what it's there for. It's give a penny, take a penny. You know you're not supposed to do it because you sneak it.
Right? And there's a price attached to it. It tells you how much it is. I had immediate karma hit me hard. I grabbed a piece of caramel out and I wrapped it and threw it in my mouth. Kim's like, you can't do that. Pulled the filling right out immediately. First buy is like, filling gone. I was like, ah. I don't know if they have them here. I haven't seen them. But in Texas, there's these little, they're like stands. And there's candy. There's gumballs. Peppermint patties. Peppermint patties and all kinds of stuff. Well, they have this little box there with a coin slot in the top. And you could put in, and it doesn't have a price. Yeah. So my bit. My bit. If I didn't have any. You just drop in money. It's like a donation. It's like a donation and you grab one. You give what you think is fair. Some people give nothing. That's awesome. That's what they think is fair. And I, if I didn't have any change, would walk up. And I didn't want to be the J, you know, the. a-hole that just walked up and grabbed a piece and walked out, so I would kind of pretend and make the sound of the change dropping in and then grab one. But, hey, listen, man. I pay my taxes. Really? And you pay your taxes, so Henry should suffer. Yeah, and you know what? It's not going to hurt them for me to have one or five chocolate-covered razors. But what if every shopper had five chocolate-covered razors? Maybe not all shoppers are as unscrupulous as I am.
We've all done it. Mike, there's no sweet factory. Dude, I've sampled stuff before. That's all I was doing. I wasn't taking handfuls. No, no, no. He wasn't taking handfuls. He was going to various bins and he was taking a sample. I was hungry. He was not taking handfuls. And I've done samples. Samples given to you or taken by you? I've taken. I've taken them, but the reason that I take a sample is because I'm like, that looks kind of weird, kind of good. Is that weird or is that good? So is it bad since you didn't buy it? I mean, okay, would it have made you feel better if I had taken a sample and said, mm, and then started filling up a batch? Yes. Yes, okay. Absolutely. I'm going to tell you. I didn't like the way they tasted it. Okay. And that's why I didn't buy it. So I'm off the hook. According to your rationale, it's okay to sample with the intent to buy. So it's okay to steal as long as you're going to eventually pay for it. Oh, for goodness sake. What is the spirit of a sampling?
Well, it's the spirit of a sample. It's not like Henry says, hey, you know what? Don't buy this in bulk. Why don't you taste it first? Then you decide. No, but I do believe that Henry says in the spirit of being a good grocer. Your neighborhood grocer. Your neighborhood grocer. I believe that they say, if you are unclear what this is all about, have a sample. If you want to bend the rules to fit. What you do. If you guys are telling me that you're not supposed to do that, because I thought that that was totally allowed, I will never do it. I mean, I don't write the rules, but I consider myself a thief. I really want to know if anyone's ever gotten in trouble doing that. 5701949, M1 Jason from San Diego. Are you there, Jason? Yes, I am. Hey, go ahead. Yeah, I just want to let you guys know that I used to work at Whole Foods Market. And it's their policy that you can sample anything you like, even if it's in the package. Yeah! If it's in the package? If it's in the package. So you can go, you can find an employee and say, you know, these oatmeal cookies or whatever that I haven't tried. I'm not sure if I'm going to like them. Can I sample them? And they'll open the package for you.
But you sample one, and if you don't like it, you don't have to buy it. And if you like it, you buy them. And so it doesn't even matter if it's packaged or if the little sample lady is there with a cart. People at Whole Foods right now are like, shut up, shut up. Go ahead and sample anything you like. So you're telling me, Jason, that I can walk in there and say, these oatmeal look good. They open the oatmeal package up. I take a single oatmeal cookie out and go like this. So embarrassing. No. No, thank you. No, thank you. You can do that? Oh, my God. I will say I went to Ralph's a couple weeks ago because I wanted to make some delicious mojitos. And so I got on my Blackberry to look at the ingredients and it said like, you know, mint, a whole bit, club soda. So I get to the aisle of beverages. I'm standing there for like five minutes because all I see is like tonic water. And I was like, is it the same thing? I don't know. Is it the same thing? So then there's a worker there.
And she was, I was like, is club soda the same thing as tonic water? And she was as clueless as I was. And she's like, I don't know, but do you want me to, do you want to try it? I can open it for you. Wow. So I was like, maybe when he said that, I'm like, maybe that's the new bit. Did you do that? No, because I didn't, I don't even know what even one tastes like. It is not the same thing. Tonic water is like. Very different. Yeah. Really? Very different. There's quinine in it. It does have quinine. In fact, when I drank, I drank vodka tonics. Oh, I'm sorry. Not tonic. I know the difference between tonic. It was. Sparkling water. Sparkling water and club soda. Is that the same thing as club soda? Of course not. No. What? No. What is club soda? Club soda is, well, first of all, I know that to me it tasted terrible. I didn't like club soda. But sparkling water is just water with fizz in it. I thought that club soda was just carbonated water. I think it's the same, isn't it? Because I would get a vodka soda when I wasn't pregnant. Isn't it just the carbonation without syrup? Well, you've got a vodka soda in front of you right now. No, I do not. She doesn't. Well, I don't know. Don't even make me go around there. Either way, the point of the story being, she was like, do you want me to open it for you? And I was like, no. But maybe it's in a bit. Wow. I feel vindicated. But you weren't in home. It doesn't matter. I feel vindicated. I was going to buy. I didn't like it. Yeah, right. Yeah, right. I was snacking. I didn't like it.
570. It doesn't taste good to me. Why'd you go back for more? I would try different things. Oh my gosh. You know what I think that the most hideous is, is trying something where you have to take the scooper. Yeah. And you have to scoop and then put it in your hand. Disgusting. What would you think, what would you guys think if you saw somebody get trail mix with their hand? I'd probably never buy in bulk again if I knew that was the kind of shenanigans that were going on. But you do know as an adult person that it's got to go on. I've never seen anyone do it. Well, you know it happens, though. It happens. I've never seen it. Woods would do that in a heartbeat. Would you do that? No, not in a store. Would you sample trail mix? Really? Not by a handful, no. Come on, I'm not an idiot. I'm not a plebeian. Translation. Translation. Translation, absolutely. As far as you guys know? Of course not. As far as you know, 0%. Of course not. Hey, there's cockroaches in restaurants, okay? Oh, my gosh. Out of sight, out of mind. Yeah, I'm no thief, man. I am. I'm petrified. I am. That's stealing. I'm petrified. M1 no name? Yeah, hi. Who would like to remain anonymous? I'm actually on my way to work at Trader Joe's right now, so please don't hear my name. Okay.
We have the exact same policy. If you want to try something, you just go to an employee and say, hey, can I open this up? I haven't tried it yet. And they'll open it right up. And also, if you buy something and you don't like it, three weeks later, you can just bring it back. No questions asked. We'll give you cash back. What if? Oh, my gosh. What if I'm doing some shopping in there and I decide to open it up on my own? Some cookies. You know what? We might throw you some shade. Like, we might look at you funny. But if you. If you leave it on the counter or you tell somebody that, you know, you open it, as long as you let somebody know, it's okay. But if you were trying to be sneaky about it, then we'd probably watch you and see if you walk out. But we could just open it ourselves and then just say, I opened this. I wanted to try it. I didn't like it. I open, like, snacks and drinks and eat it throughout the store. And then I come up. Yeah. But I'm talking about not. paying for it and saying you didn't like it. Yeah, if you open those packets of, you know, nuts or cookies or whatever and you're sampling it through the store and you come up when you're ready to check out and you say, I opened this. I don't really like it. I say, okay, and just put it aside and write it off and spoil it and it's done. So, M1 No Name, now I have the real question for you. Okay. Because I need to know this. Let's say I become that guy today. Uh-huh. Do you judge me?
Be honest. No one knows. Trust you. I might have my eyes at you, but, you know, whatever. That means there's no way I'll do it. Yeah, and she's like, really, pal? You don't know what an oatmeal cookie tastes like? You're 40 years old, okay? I know you've had oatmeal cookies. I know you've eaten an oatmeal cookie. Yeah, she looks at me, she's like... Really? You don't know what salami tastes like, not Chubb? Chubb. You really needed a sample of that, didn't you? The deli. It's like the deli. But it's also like the bit that Woods was talking about. Oh, he was so irritated. Cold Stone. Cold Stone. Saturday night, giant line. It's taken forever. They're in line. And Woods is behind. Nothing wrong. Sample guy. Sample guy. There's something wrong with it. Then why do they offer free samples? You know what? But here's the deal, Sienna. He wasn't having like... Oh, that's blueberry cheesecake flavor. Even still, you know what blueberry cheesecake tastes like. But it doesn't translate. It translates. No, it doesn't. I know what blueberries taste like. I know what cheesecake tastes like. But this guy was like, ooh, can I try that mint chocolate chip? And I'm like, dude.
No, they don't. It tastes like mint chocolate chip. It's exactly what it tastes like. At Cold Stone, they don't have just normal flavors like that. Right, but he was getting the normal flavors. They don't have that there, though. They have mint chocolate chip. No, they have. And I mean, Sienna, is he Paul Giamatti in Sideways testing wine? Right, exactly. I don't like him. When I go to the yogurt place, they give you those little tiny cups and you can try all the flavors you want. Are you that guy? Yeah. There's nothing wrong with it. I don't know. It's self-serve. It's banana. It's self-serve. You know what it tastes like? It tastes like a banana. It's better than others. Sometimes it tastes like powdered Kool-Aid or something. It doesn't taste like banana. It tastes like banana. No. It did. So you know. Our phone lines right now are jammed. I'm sure. You cannot get through. Are people calling me a thief? No, no, no. They're not. They're not. They're just calling to tell you about all the different places that do this. Wow. There's more places. I'll never pay for lunch again. I know it. Sample girl. Chris, keep everybody. Keep everybody on the line. We'll do. We'll let people know what these different places are. If I had known we were going to play this, I'd have worn my white leather jacket with shoulder pads and tassels.
Jay, will you go grab that out of the office? All right, so we'll tell you more of these places when we come back. It's all coming up. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. This is the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar. Well, this week you can go see the Temper Travit House of Blues on Wednesday night. Silver Sun Pickups plays Soma Saturday night, and Tokyo Police Club hits the Casbah Sunday night. Next week, My Morning Jackets at the Open Air Theater on Wednesday the 11th, and the Soft Pack will play after the last race at the Del Mar Racetrack on Friday the 13th. You can also catch Reverend Horton Heat at House of Blues on the 14th, or Coheed and Cambria at 4th and B, also on the 14th.
The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion hits Oceanside Pier on the 29th. And a few shows just announced. The Colt play 4th and B September 14th. Kelly from Block Party plays 4th and B on September 19th. And LCD Sound System will play Remake Arena with Hot Chip October 13th. So there you have it. Get out there and see some shows. The FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar can be heard four times daily. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 Bud Light Concert Calendar at fm949sd.com. Hello, this is Hoyle, and I'm here to tell you that Hoyle's House of Pants has officially filed for Chapter 11, just in time for Hoyle's House of Bolo Ties and Western Warehouse. Wait, Bolo's. Hoyle's bolo tie and Western Warehouse take two. We have short necks, long necks, flex ties, pull-ons, flare-ups, pull-me-downs, side style, and we now carry Little Shy Geisha brand boots. Don't miss our Where the Heck is Summer at Anyway sale this weekend. All swim boots are also at low discount prices.
along with swim jeans and water hats. Also, visit us online at www.hoils-bolo-tie-anda-western-warehouse.org backslash mainpage backslash one dot html. That's Hoyles Bolo Tie and Western Warehouse. End. Silver Sun Pickups. Saturday, August 7th. Soma. Silver Sun Pickups. Saturday, August 7th. Soma. 3350 Sports Arena Boulevard. Soma is an all-ages venue. Tickets are on sale now at the Soma box office or go to Ticketmaster.com. Silver Sun Pickups. Saturday, August 7th. You are so hard to read. I am? I just wish you were more like this new Coors Light cold activation window. It's a hole in the box, Rob. It's a window to refreshment. I know the beer is cold before I buy it because I can see the mountains are blue on the labels. No guessing.
What? Frost Brewed Coors Light, the world's most refreshing beer. Coors Brewing Company, Golden, Colorado. With great beer comes great responsibility. Saturday, August 7th, don't miss your chance to get a free Del Mar pint glass set featuring the queen of racing, thoroughbred superstar Zenyatta. Free with racetrack admission. New homes now. It's Lennar's New Homes Now Sell-A-Thon. On August 7th, you're invited to join Lennar and celebrate new reduced pricing at Sky Ranch in Santee. Enjoy a fun-filled day of barbecue, live music, family activities, and enter their sweepstakes strong. The event will be held on Saturday, August 7th from 1130 a.m. to 230 p.m. on Calico Street in Santee, located just off the 67 freeway at Prospect. While you're there, take a moment to walk around their stunning property and view the elegant Hilltop Homes. Townhomes start in the upper 200,000s at single-family homes Start in the upper $400,000. Come by to see the great views, enjoy the barbecue, and take advantage of the incredible home pricing at Sky Ranch. For more information, call 877-205-2053 or visit Lenar.com. That's L-E-N-M-A-R.com. See a Lenar new homes consultant for restrictions, qualifications, and conditions on prize awards. Price is subject to change. Lenar Homes of California Inc. License number 728102. DRE License number 012-52753. Equal housing opportunity 710.
All across the country, there's a real buzz about Ovation hair care products. You've heard about Ovation on radio or television, but the real stories come from friends telling friends how they've repaired the damage from heat styling, harsh chemicals, extensions, and how they've stopped breakage and hair loss due to stress and diet. If Ovation didn't live up to its promise of thicker, stronger, longer, and healthier hair, people wouldn't be talking about it. And they are. I've always had problems with slow hair growth. Since using Ovation, I can tell a significant difference in the length and health of my hair. There's a big difference in the amount of hair loss, too. Ovation has definitely lived up to its promise. For thicker, stronger, longer, and healthier hair, log on to OvationHair.com and enter FM 94.9 at checkout for a special discount. If Ovation didn't live up to its promises, people wouldn't be talking about it. And they are.
Hear that? That's the sound of Applebee's amazing new sizzling entrees. And fresh flavor never sounded so good. Because Applebee's sizzling entrees are served on an iron skillet that sizzles from our kitchen to your table. Try the sizzling Asian shrimp, sizzling steak and cheese, or our juicy chicken with queso blanco. Each with layers of flavor you can see, taste, and hear. Starting at $8.99. Only at Applebee's. There's no place like the neighborhood. It's getting late. The world is calling it a night. But the neighborhood is just getting started. Applebee's is now open till midnight or later. So stop in after the game. Swing by after the show. Grab some friends because your favorite neighborhood grill and bar is still going strong. Applebee's now open till midnight or later. Another reason why there's no place like the neighborhood. Starting at 9 p.m., $3 Brutus drafts, under $5 appetizers, nightly drink specials, and lots of fun.
Have you been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes? If so, you may be eligible to participate in a clinical research study comparing the effects of an investigational long-acting insulin and FDA-approved Lantus or insulin glargine on blood glucose levels at Profil Institute for Clinical Research. You may qualify if you have been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes, are between 18 and 65 years of age, and are currently controlling condition with Lantus or insulin glargine. This study will require four overnights and a total of 10 hours. If you qualify and choose to participate, you may be compensated up to $3,400. For more information, call 1-866-245-5921. Once again, Profil Institute is looking for type 1 diabetics between the ages of 18 and 65 years old who are currently controlling condition with Lantus or insulin glargine and otherwise healthy. Call Profil at 1-866-245-5921 to see if you qualify. That's 1-866-245-5921. Pick up Reese's Peanut Butter Cups in the candy aisle at your favorite store and treat yourself to the perfect combination of chocolate and peanut butter. Reese's Perfect.
This report brought to you by In-N-Out Burger, where your double-double and fries are made fresh the moment you order them, not a moment before. In-N-Out, that's what a hamburger is all about. 52 westbound between the 15 and Convoy Street, slow this morning in the 40s right now. Escondido's kind of backed up, too, on that 15 southbound between the 78 Center City Parkway. And checking out Carlsbad, we'll go over there on that 5 southbound between Poinsettia Lane and Santa Fe Drive. It's slow as well. This report, it's brought to you by Remax. In the market to buy or sell a home, REMAX agents have the experience it takes to get the job done. Visit REMAX.com today. Nobody sells more real estate than REMAX. Outstanding agents, outstanding results. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego, Lincoln Financial Radio Station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't like feet. Lauren. I worked at Comic-Con. Woods. I eat Omen Joyce by the truckload, dude. Zienna. Oh, I love the bedazzler. And Jake. I have the worst body hair, I gotta tell you. My ears, I'm getting ear hair. Me too, dude. I'm getting old man ear hair. On FM 94.9. Like sweet honey in my ears. That's right. Mikey's show is five people, myself, Woods, Lauren.
Sienna, and Jay. Woodsy's snuff is hard to find. In Dallas it is, and he can get it all over the place. So we were talking about taking food samples. Woodsy likes to sample out of the bins, you know? And we want to get your take on it. We're hearing from people that most stores' policy is, you know, even with packaged food, you can grab somebody that works at the store and say, I'd like to try this. I feel vindicated. A new flavor of Dorito. Can I give this a try? Oh, my gosh. Isn't that crazy? There's a couple out there, a couple new flavors Mikey and I ran into. Yep. There's a lot. We had to make about three stops that day because Mikey needed a little bit of everything. Oh, wow. Statler Brothers, as he calls it, Henry's, and the gas station. Kim does the opposite. She'll bring a new product home. We'll try it. If we don't like it, she takes it back.
You are kidding me. I don't like these. I would die of embarrassment. I don't do it. I don't do it, but she has no problem with it at all. She's like, we don't like these. I've come back to Trader Joe's and been like, I got an avocado. I got a bag of avocados and they were all brown and stringy on the inside. And they're like, there you go. No problem. Oh my gosh. Without a receipt. I would die. I just think that that's my bad. I should have checked. I would die. No, you can't know when you open it up and it's rotten. I just give mine to Mikey. Really? Most of the time I don't bother, but I've done it before. I would never think to do it. I didn't know. My sister told me you couldn't. I was like, what? Bro, if I buy a shirt and I don't try it on and I take it home, I won't take it back. But what about, didn't you say Nordstrom, you bring stuff back after like years if it's ripped up? Banana Republic you can. I never did. I worked there. That's the only reason I knew it. M1 Fight the Power from San Diego. I used to work at Jimbo's in Del Mar, and they leave sample bowls out on the aisles. And one day I was working in a cooler, and I see this kid walking down the aisle, and he's picking his nose. Oh, I don't know if I can do this. Into the sample bowl. Oh, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no.
No, no. Go back in time. We're in the DeLorean. Yes. We're going back in time. Let's get it up to 88. We didn't hear it. Let's go back in time. Never happened. I don't know that that actually happened. We're good. I've been to Jimbo's. I don't, a lot of their samples, they'll put like spoons and stuff and you're, you're only supposed to use the spoons, but people don't. I only trust the samples that are given to me by a lady with gloves. I don't trust the ones that are sitting out where people can free for all. My day just left my body. How about a guy's walking into the store? He looks over his right shoulder. looks over his left shoulder, as we've all done, reached in, adjusted the voice, then walked in, feasted on a sample. Then you come in and you put your little hands in there and get yourself a sample. You're now feasting on his readjustment. Exactly. People go to the restroom all the time and they don't do their thing. Exactly. Why are we talking like this now? I'm going to be sick. I'll tell you why. Because we need to be aware. Yeah. As citizens. Knowing is half the battle. That's right. Maybe the key is that what you do is you take your big bulk scooper and you go way in. No, because then you're being a jerk. Because then your skin is all in there. Disgusting. Maybe don't buy in bulk. You know what I just thought to myself, though? Everything's going to be sealed from now on for me. No, you know what I just thought to myself? What? Aren't we being a little bit dramatic? It's one thing. That's the thing that I was saying. Out of sight, out of mind. People in Europe right now.
Are thinking to themselves. Idiot. You're such pansy. Yeah. Speaking this way. You're afraid of the germs? Yeah. Oh, you want to cry, little baby? Poor little Spanish boy. Most of the stuff, we'd survive. We'd fight it off. You know, it makes you stronger. Yeah. Little Spaniard. But it's just gross to see it. I'm Mexican, French guy. You're a Spaniard to me. I'm one Megan from San Diego. Hey, guys, I've got the ultimate. I've got two kids' membership to Costco. We call them the Costco vultures. Yeah? Oh, yeah. You can't even get through the aisle. People are, like, just on the tables waiting for the next ones to be put out. It's like, you're not even going to buy it. What are you doing? People go there, I'm convinced of it, to have a meal in college and leave full. My dad took my mom there for their anniversary last night for dinner. Yeah. My dad loves Costco. Free samples. Sorry, Dad. I love you. In college, we'd watch a little Cheech and Chong, go to Costco, make it real right. Read between the lines on that one. Real good. Talk about college. This is a lifetime ago. I know it. 5701949. Thank you, Megan. Yeah, those Costco... I'll tell you what, though, man. Those samples taste good. That place kicks ass. They are good. Every sample. How come everything made by a company called...
Kirkland. Kirkland's signature. Tastes so good. You ever had their soup? No. Don't knock your socks off, man. But some of the samples are stuff like things I would never eat, never want to try. But because they're out, I try them and I love them. Well, Kirkland will buy up. Remember when we went to the Del Mar Fair, they're Australian potatoes. She's trying to get those in Costco. They know what they're doing. They buy the good stuff. That's fair food. What happened to Sienna yesterday is embarrassing, and even her husband doesn't know. Oh, God. I haven't literally spoken it to anyone. I just typed it in my recap. Tell us what happened. Oh, wow. Well, yesterday I had one of my many doctor's appointments. I'm due to have a baby in about three weeks. Any minute. Any minute. So one of my favorite things about this particular doctor's office is the parking situation. It was a nightmare. I mean, literally, the parking lot is designed for Mini Coopers and smart cars. So when I pull in, and I don't have a big car, but I pulled in and I tried to find the roomiest spot I could get. But when I came back to my car after my appointment, there were two new cars next to me. I go up, try to go up to my door to get in. Can't get in.
No way. She's too big. My belly. The belly. I would have been. I was trying everything I could. And I was like smacking my stomach. And people, you know, like. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. It's like outside a hospital. There's so many people around. And I'm like, all right, well, what do I do? What do I do? I'm going to try the passenger side. Right. Oh, my God. No luck on the passenger side. Oh, my God. No luck. And I. There's a trunk in my car. I can't like climb in the back. I would have done that if I had an SUV. I've been to her, the doctor she's talking about. No lie. I have a tiny little car and I've been blocked in. The smallest space is known to man. But it's humiliating because I'm like nine months pregnant practically and I can't get in my car. What did you do? Poor thing. Did you cry? No, I didn't cry. I sat and I waited. Oh my God, you did not. I had to wait. I couldn't get in my car. I would have called a tow truck. I'm not going to call a tow truck. Can you move this six feet? That would have taken forever. Luckily, I didn't have to wait very long. I waited like 15 minutes. But I literally sat and I waited. Did you tell the person when they got there? It wasn't their fault. It's not their fault. It's not their fault.
What are they going to do? Maybe when you get out of your car, make sure that the other person can get into there. But you just said it. It's tight there. Yeah. Those spaces are... If my husband was with me, he would have been able to squeeze through, but I was by myself at this event. And back out. And I'm wide load right now. I would have gone through the trunk. There's no way. Did you do the bit where you leaned on the... trunk of your car and, like, made phone calls? Just, like, made fake phone calls? No, there's a bench over there. I just sat and I waited. Oh, my gosh. It was really bad. I didn't even, like, I didn't even do the embarrassed phone call. Like, guess what just happened to me? I just, I sat there and I was like, I would have cried and started texting people. No, it was embarrassing. I, like, didn't, like, I didn't. Her husband, Todd, doesn't even know. Doesn't even know. He's finding out right now. Oh, he's already at work. He probably still doesn't even know. I would have called him crying and been like, you need to come get me. Look what you did to me. It's not his fault. He was at work. I had my appointment right during the middle of the day. What do you do? I would have gone in through my... I have a hatchback. I would have gone in through my trunk. Yeah, but when you're pregnant too, I can't be like crawling around back there. It's pretty...
Pretty embarrassing. Maybe I don't park in that parking lot anymore and I walk a mile. Maybe you take the bus there from now on. I know. Maybe that's happened to me in my past for a different reason. Has it? No. No, it was humiliating. You know what? The spaces at some of these places, you go, what are you doing? Yeah, it makes me mad. And you know what it's about? Money. Yeah, get more cars in there. You pay per car. More people coming to, you know, use your... place. Sons of bitches. It's like an airplane. A couple cars next to me, like down the row, was a Honda taking up two spots. I wanted to kill that car. Nothing makes me crazier than the... Line, Parker. On the line. Yeah, maybe Hakaluvian. But it's like, look, dude, we're all in the same boat. I squeezed my pregnant butt in that spot. You can do the same Honda. Exactly. Maybe Hakaluvian. I should have. Maybe not. Maybe leave him a note. I've done that before. I've done that too. Maybe Hakaluvian. I'm a paparazzi from San Diego.
Here's a weird idea. It might feel kind of weird, but have you considered asking one of the people that were walking by, hey, can you back my car out six feet? Oh, good idea. But then they leave with it. That's even more humiliating. And my car's my baby, and I don't want strangers driving me. That's a good idea, though. That's a good idea. Kate Moss-type girl to walk by? Yeah. Do your favorite. I've been waiting an hour. You're like, hey, Stretch, can you back this up? Waiting for Andy Dick to walk by? That's right. You wouldn't need me, yeah. You wouldn't need for Andy Dick to come by. You ask him to get in your car and pull it? That's ridiculous. I know. Oh, man. Poor baby. I'm going to take a picture of the parking lot next time I go, next week. It breaks my heart. And I'll post it. Yeah. It's a joke. I know what you're talking about. It's ridiculous. How funny are those little smart cars, by the way? I know. It's hysterical. My car is basically a smart car. Pretty much. My car is a step up. Yours is double the size, though. Yeah, it's true. But the actual smart cars are hysterical. Just the two seats. My wife, you know what she does every time she sees one? Meet me. Every single time. People do that with my car, too. Meet me. Meet me. You know what? I like Mini Coopers. I do, too. I think they're cool.
You don't like them? You saw The Italian Job 2, huh? I saw that movie. I did. It's a good movie. Here's the thing. I don't think smart cars should be on the freeway. They scare me to death. I think they should only be like in city situations or like... Like mopeds. Yeah, because if they get hit, I'm so scared for them. On the freeway? I mean, maybe I'm wrong. They have to have like some serious airbags or something. Still. It's super safe. Are they? Yeah, they have a... major frame inside of them. They've done all these tests. Maybe, I guess. I don't know. I just get scared for them. Especially next to like a Mack truck. Maybe I pick one up over my head. Yeah. Maybe I put one in my shoe. Maybe we put a bunch of clowns in there and see how many we can fit. Maybe we have a bunch of Shriners come pouring out of them. Maybe I strap one to each foot and I skate around the building. Easy Paul Bunyan. So yesterday, yesterday Lauren posted something on her Twitter and People were reacting to it. She sent it to me. Kind of unbelievable. I was furious. I was like, I don't even know if I want to put this out there because I don't want to give anyone the wrong idea. You got this story, Sienna? Which one? The one about the Australian chick. The mistress. The sugar babe. Oh, yeah, yeah. Sugar babe. The sugar babe. I'm in already. Sugar salute. No, it's the author. She wrote a book. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Let me find it. The book should be called The Dumbbell.
She sounds intelligent. This author, her name is Holly Hill, and basically she says that women should negotiate infidelity with their husbands. Oh, boy. Why? Because your husbands are going to cheat anyway. May as well be on your terms. Wow. Wow. Yeah. Wow. That's what she says. Might as well know about it. Yeah. Run me through this. How does this work? She believes that men are hardwired to cheat, and so rather than go through the heartbreak of it happening, why not just negotiate it beforehand? For instance, what she does with her boyfriend. is she says, you can sleep with other girls, but you can't spend the night. Yeah, you can't cuddle. You can't spoon. Yeah, I'm on. Creeper. And... What? And, by the way, you know what gave her the idea to write said book? What? Well, she was dating a married guy, and... She was a mistress. She was a professional mistress. Yeah. Yeah. She put up an ad on Craigslist and got 11,000 responses. Holy...
Hey, everybody, we're all going to get laid. $1,000 a week, she said. $1,000 a week would get a guy companionship, a girlfriend. She was looking for sugar daddies. In her mind, it wasn't a prostitute. In her mind, it was, I'm going to be like your girlfriend. Yeah. I'm basically going to be your girlfriend. But she's written this book, and people are buying it. Yeah. sold 24 000 copies in australia where she's from and it's just been released to the u.s and holly hill is a pen name does that just mean a fake name yeah fake name yeah and she's inspiring women to be like oh okay so you're saying i should let my husband cheat and then then everything will be okay since he's going to anyway but her deal is like you know your husband's going to do the nasty with whoever he wants, basically. But, you know, this way, if you talk to him about it, he won't spoon. There's not going to be that kind of connection. And you can have some rules, some ground rules. Yeah, that way he's just getting in, getting out. Maybe you have that perception of men because you're dating married guys. Right. Yeah. Yeah. And what is weird to me is the intercourse doesn't bother her. Yeah, doesn't bother her. It's the cuddling.
Yeah. She doesn't want their... Well, and the way... I don't even know if the book said it or not. They're saying men and women treat sex differently. And men, it's just a physical act. It doesn't mean anything. In and out. On with your life. And women develop that emotional connection. So she's saying, I don't want you to have any room for the emotional connection. Just get in and out. Really? And she says, too, that if your man cheats on you, he still loves you. Yeah. It's just he's a man and he's going to cheat. Listen to this quote that she said. She is... The dopiest dipstick. This is what she said. I think that cheating men are normal. Monogamous men are heroes. Monogamy does have a place in relationships, but not on the long term. Men are hardwired to betray women on the long term. She is teaching women to have low self-esteem. It's awful. She's teaching women to not have enough confidence in themselves to be able to find a guy who would remain monogamous. Well, here's the thing, and we kind of talked about this off the other day. I don't know if human beings, and especially men, are hardwired to be monogamous. But, you know, we're also not hardwired to have government and civility and society. And if we're going to have all this stuff, you know, you can't just have hedonism and be like, hey, the cavemen did it. Well, yeah. Well, doesn't it kind of, for me, it begs the question.
Well, what determines ethics? What determines morals? You know, what determines it? Because there may be somebody listening right now and they're like, hey, got no problem with that. Sure. You know, there may be somebody that's listening and go, listen, I'd rather negotiate right up front with my dude. Some people are cool with that open relationship and to each his own. Now, see, I have a theory on that, by the way. I don't actually believe. that they are i believe that they lie and say that they are how do you do that so that they won't be alone because i think you do that because you are emotionally a broken person you're an emotionally broken person if you listen this is my deal is given my opinion some people may not agree with this i'm sure you're right i'm just saying like that It's a hard thing to turn your cheek to, you know. And by the way, I have, listen, I have every bit of compassion for the broken person because you're talking to broken person numero uno, man. I have been so shattered in my life and low self-esteem and just terrible self-esteem, you know. And at the end of the show on Fridays, I always talk about that, how God changed my life. But listen, man, this chick saying.
To negotiate with your dude to cheat is creeper, man. And Lauren's point of people not being hardwired to be monogamous, I mean, that holds a little water. But, you know, that's why they call it a commitment. Exactly. Commitments aren't easy. When you make a commitment to do something, like let's, for example, our show, we try to commit to a lot of things and it doesn't always stick. But when we really... put our mind to it and i i heard something in church one time that said you have to make an attempt every day and you have to try to be married yeah every if you're married well and that's why you do it in the eyes of god and in the eyes of the court right to be like i'm held accountable for this and witnesses and everything commitments aren't easy i've committed to quitting smoking it's not easy but that's it's not supposed to be you know what i'm saying and i don't but i don't think that we're so to speak, to be with one person. But that's why you make that commitment to that person. You commit to it. I think I might be able to agree with that and get on board with that. I mean, I sort of have the opinion, though, and you guys have heard me say this. I don't believe that I'm hardwired to be a good guy. Right. Exactly. And you have to work at it. You have to work at it. And we all do, man. That's why we commit to it. And you have to make an attempt every day to be married or to be committed.
Ooh, this one looks interesting. Saucy? Oh, we got a saucy one on the line. And when we come back, we're going to take it. We're going to take this call when we get back. We got a saucy one. Playing my song. Don't go away. Thank you, Dave. Hi, Mikey. Hey, Dave Matthews. How you doing, buddy? I'm all right, man. How come you're walking around in your underoos? Because I live here. You're in my house. I know that, but usually you wear a robe. I like these. Phillip Rivers underoos. Go Chargers. Those are Phillip River underoos. They make those in your size. I am too. They're actually not my size. They're not. For a few minutes while I educate your butt. Let your voice be heard on the Mikey Show now. How are these levels, friends? Call 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com.
More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Miller Lite and Scion. On the main stage, Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros. The Rogue Wave. The Delta Spirit. On the Casbah Local 94.9 stage. The Nervous Records. The Silent Comedy. The Burning of Rome. And White Apple Tree. Get your tickets for $30 today. No service fees or extra charges at FM949SD.com or IndependenceJam.com. Plus a dollar goes to the About the Music Fund, which helps to support music education in San Diego County Public Schools. Eat bands at the beach, get tickets, and join the party August 29th in Oceanside. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion, supported by Wahoo's Fish Tacos. FM 94.9 welcomes the soft pack on August 13th for the 2010 Del Mar Summer Concert Series at the Del Mar Thoroughbred Club and Racetrack. Gotta answer, dude.
Four o'clock Friday concerts. They're held at the Seaside Stage next to the Seaside Terrace Cabana, and all shows are free with your track admission. Come out and enjoy exciting racing action, and then stay for the free concert after the races. Visit www.delmarscene.com. LCD Sound System with Hot Jet. Coming to Remac Arena Wednesday, October 13th. This LCD Sound System, October 13th. It's on sale August 6th at 10 a.m. At the Remack Arena box office. Ticketmaster.com. Or by phone at 800-745-3000. If any tries. LCD sound system with hot jet. Produced by AEG Live.
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Even his tree houses have finished basements. His business card just says, Most interesting men always drink beer. But when I do, for Dos Equis. Enjoy Dos Equis responsibly. Imported by Cervezas Mexicanas, White Plains, New York. Thirsty, my friend. Just when you thought your eyes had been dialed into everything, along comes a reason for an optic overhaul. Introducing the next generation of does, the all-new Droid X. Forget in home theater. This does in-phone theater. This does movies, videos, even live mobile TV on a 4.3-inch screen so big, your eyes will be glued to each and every square inch of real estate. This does HD video capture, even mobile hotspots powerful enough to fuel multiple devices at will. So you can launch the internet where you want, when you want. But most of all, it has the power to change you, turning tasks into entertainment and you into a media-consuming machine.
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This report is brought to you by REMAX. In the market to buy or sell a home, REMAX agents have the experience it takes to get the job done. Visit REMAX.com today. Nobody sells more real estate than REMAX. Outstanding agents, outstanding results. Looks like the 163 southbound at the 8. We've got carpet padding in the left lane of the connector ramp. Watch out for that. And you know what? It's kind of a soft drive this morning in Santee on the 125 southbound after the 52 foam insulation. That one's in the left lane. CHP's on the way to clear it. But the 15 northbound at Ocean View Boulevard, there is an accident. It's a hit and run on the Ocean View Boulevard on ramp. No injuries, but they are clearing that off the roadway momentarily. This report, it is brought to you by San Diego Chargers. They need you to lead the charge. Chargers single game tickets on sale now. Call 1-800-745-3000 or go online at chargers.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I want to be a movie director more than anything else. Lauren. Yes, I'm going to get a wheatgrass shot. Woods. I'm a great baseball player, but I could be better. Sienna. Only time I'll eat spinach is if it's in artichoke dip. And Jay. I would rather be skating or surfing any day. On FM 94.9. We're going to go to M1 Anonymous in just a second. We're talking about a woman from Australia that wrote a book.
that says you should negotiate fidelity with the guy that you're going to be with. And make it so that if he wants to cheat, he can, but you just have certain parameters. That's what we were talking about. Tonight's 8 o'clock album, Frank Black, self-titled album. Sienna, what's going on in the news? Yesterday, BP began its static... Kill attempt. Yes, this could seal the Gulf of Mexico oil well, which is really good. Engineers won't know for more than a week if it's going to plug the well for good. And also this weekend, really exciting. Have you guys ever heard or been to the U.S. Open Sandcastle Competition in Imperial Beach? Every year. Well, not woods, obviously, because you haven't been here. But they do this huge sandcastle competition. It's a two-day event. They do the sandcastles on Saturday. The judging goes on Sunday. I get the DVD. I just wait for them. No, it is so cool. Watch the live broadcast. These people make the most amazing sandcastles you've ever seen. I can't wait to see them. Monday, I can't wait to see what they look like. I can't do that. Oh, no. I mean, they're artists. We make fun because we can't do it. Oh, come on. I'm not even making fun. I'm just trying to have a good time. People from around the country come to be in this contest, and you can win thousands of dollars in prizes. Woodsy, what's going on in sports?
The Padres lost a heartbreaker last night, 2-1 to the Dodgers, but they'll have two more cracks at the Dodgers the next two nights. And the Rays are your new AL East leader. My Yankees are slipping and sliding. Alex Rodriguez stuck on 599 homers for the last 12 games. He is struggling and scuffling, so sucks. M1 Anonymous is on the line. M1 Anonymous from San Diego, are you there? Hey, what's up, guys? How you doing? Good. So M1 Anonymous says... I was driving to work and my jaw dropped because I know exactly who you're talking to. Now, in all actuality, it could be another Australian woman with a dim view of men who is writing a book about how men will inherently cheat, but I don't think so. Buddy, what you're saying is that you believe that you actually dated this person when you were stationed in Europe. Yes. No, without a doubt. The way you guys describe her in your assessment of her personality, how she was, her self-esteem, everything. Looking for sugar daddies? Would you consider yourself a sugar daddy? I was not a sugar daddy. I wrote a blog online, and she contacted me looking for advice on how to write better. And we hit it off and became MySpace friends, and I had just gone through a divorce. She was, you know...
Do you know about an age range that she would be now? She would be 26 or 27 now. Not the same woman. Her birthday's in February, so 28. This woman says Hill, who was 39 at the time when she was working on a certain study. There's a picture of her. There's a picture of her online. Oh, there's a picture of her? Yeah, CNN.com. Hey, but I'll tell you this. Maybe she was lying to you, dude. You never know. I'll tell you this, though. I like your story. I love your story. Very interesting that you were dating that girl. Wouldn't that be amazing? She was writing a book. It would be incredible. burnout relationship where I thought I wasn't going to be in love forever. And then I started just finding out these things about how she, how she views men and that, you know, um, well, you know, you're going to cheat, say you're going to cheat inherently. So I just, I just like to go over with, and then I went back to Europe to finish my tour and I would just get these friends to call. Who are you out with? What are you doing? And I said, well, you know, I'm, I'm going out with my friends. I'm not cheating on you. If that's what you're worried about. And she'd always come back to the thing. Well, you're going to cheat anyway. I just want to know about it.
She was Australian, this girl? Yes. She was half Australian, half New Zealander. You know what's interesting, too? Thank you for the call. Great call. I'm one anonymous. And this is what's, I was kind of thinking this, you know. We've all probably been through this. Maybe some of us haven't. I have. Where you're, maybe you start to date somebody. And it's just going great. Like, they're really, really awesome. And then, all of a sudden, maybe it's something kind of minor, but you go, uh-oh. Oh, boy. Oh, wow. That is a trait or a quality. And it's not something like, you know, the way they chew their food. Right. It's something like big. It's something like legit that you go, that's weird. You know, like I'll give you, for instance, let's say you're dating a girl and it's like really, really awesome. And you think she's really cool. Everything's going really, really good.
All of a sudden, you realize that she, like, maybe she lets you know that she dated a football player. Yeah. And you're like, oh, cool. You know, whatever. You know, it strikes you as like, wow, you know, we've been dating now for two months and wow, what a trip. You know, I didn't know that in two months, but you told me. Okay, great. And so you're dating, you're dating. And then all of a sudden she tells you, oh, yeah, I dated this other football player. And you're like, really? Because you told me the other one. You dated another guy? Yeah, yeah. Why? Is that weird? Then you're the D. Yeah, then you're the D. But then it could be something else. Maybe it's that you just find out that she's got this weird fascination with something. But she's so cool. Everything's so wrapped. Same thing with a guy. You could be dating some dude. He's totally cool. Everything's awesome about him. And then all of a sudden he tells you that, oh, yeah.
I used to visit prostitutes regularly. Oh, boy. You know, like, or some weird date. You know, you find out something weird and you're like, really? Like, I wouldn't have pinned you for the, you know, you date the, you're the serial pro athlete dater. Right. Right. I wouldn't have pinned you for the, I'm into whatever. Harlots. Yeah, whatever. Right. But do you guys know what I'm talking about? I know exactly what you're talking about. It's that, it's, you know, you don't want to reveal too much at first, but then. More things come along. I mean, bro, I dated a girl once and found out like two months in that she was like, that's not funny, but like when I remember it, she was like a hardcore racist. Racist. Like racist. And you just didn't know. They had no idea. That's what I mean. That's what I'm talking about. I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa. That's off color. That's off color. That's off color. And I'm fine. Everything's totally cool. And then one day you're like. Oh, wow. Yeah. You girls ever experience that with a dude where you're like, all of a sudden something crazy comes out and you're like, oh. Or just strange. Yeah. Maybe not crazy, but bizarre. Like, oh, I didn't know you wet the bed. Yeah. Stuff like that. You know what I mean? I know someone who had one of those. Yeah. Just strange things, you know, where it's just a weird thing and you find out and you go. Yeah. And your brain kind of wants to let go of it.
Yes. But you're like, but I need to know more. Yeah. I'm fascinated. Yeah, you go over to their house and they've got vampire teeth on their counter. Ew. And you're like, what are those? She's like, I'm into goth. I dress up as a goth girl. It's vampire teeth. Brad Pitt dating Angelina Jolie now and finding Billy Bob Thornton's blood hanging in a necklace or jewelry box. Yeah. That is a perfect example because... that wouldn't be something necessarily that you would see or know right away. Is that weird? Yes. What is this necklace you have? I've never seen anything like it. It's my ex-husband's blood. That's so weird because it sounded like you said your ex-husband's blood. What did you actually say? It's my ex-husband's blood. Sorry, it's his hemoglobin. It's his hemoglobin. Terrifying. Oh, my gosh. It's kind of sexy. Yeah. Kind of sexy. Kind of in on it. Yeah. I don't know why, but I'm kind of in on it. Would you wear Jamie's blood? Absolutely. Oh, my God. Crazy. Yes. Thank you. Maybe you like vampires after all. Blah. Maybe call you Edward. Blah. Maybe call him Creeper. Blah. He called Discus. Crazy. I wish that she would wear a vial of my blood around her neck. Is that weird? Yeah.
A little bit. She's just finding that out. You know, it's funny. When I was dating Rebecca. Make that right. When I was dating Rebecca, and you guys know how conservative and blah, blah, blah. Yeah. I got a tattoo of her birth date on my arm. She was crazy about it. She loved it. Oh. In a good way. Oh, yeah. Like. It was hot. Oh, she loved it. And we broke up. Let me tell you. Don't get a tattoo. If you're dating somebody, even if you're married, it's not necessary to get names and tattoos. Maybe when you're like 85 and you've been together 50 years. Are we going to make it? I think so. But we were dating and I got her birthday. We broke up. We were broke up for a while. By a while, I mean like a month. And I got it covered up. In a month? She was heartbroken. Oh, yeah. She was heartbroken. Oh, yeah. I would be.
But what are you supposed to do? You know, like when you break up, you think it's for good. Yeah. It's that Batman looking. Yeah. Yeah. So you went with the barbed wire. It's not barbed wire. No, it's not barbed wire. You went with the tribal. What tribe are you from? What part of Samoa did you grow up in? Oh, boy. It's so true. Mike has a lot of tattoos. Tribal. Real good. It's awful. Is he a topper? Yeah, I know. Do you ever think about getting it tattooed back on there? Yeah, do it again. I'll go with you. has said a million times, will you please? We'll go get our old ladies. Mikey, why don't you? She's the mother of your kids now. You don't want to jinx it? Oh, yeah. I mean, for sure. I mean, it just seems so. Maybe get it right across your forehead. Yeah, like Mike Tyson. Yeah, like do the Mike Tyson. There you go. Get it in like Sanskrit so nobody will know what it is. Yeah, right there on my forehead. I'll do it with you. You don't have any tattoos, do you? I have one, and it's a piece of it. It's a butterfly on the back of his back. Yeah, it's a tramp stamp. Butterfly tramp stamp. It's right in the small of his back. It's a stupid sun I picked off the wall when I was drunk in Austin. On the back of your shoulder. It's a bullseye, right? Above his butt cry. Really? It's the weirdest thing. Creeper. You know how I know you're gay? How? Because you macromade yourself a pair of jean shorts. Love to go up the winder.
When we're out surfing. Oh, yeah. Our boy, Winder. And small of his back, he's got the word Winder. And I like to go up to him with my index finger and go. Nice target. Drives him crazy. Disgusting. Yeah. You guys want to play a little MIDI madness? Please. 570-1949. Give us a call right now. We'll play some MIDI madness. And what it is is, you know what middies are. Terrible sounding little Casio organ. Songs, you know, but these are popular songs that are played in MIDI. You just have to tell us, well, what is that? That's all you got to do. It's one of my favorite games. It's fun. And so we'll play it. And if you know what it is, then you have to tell us what it is. And if you can't figure out what it is, I'll give you a bicep hold around your eyes and crush your eyes out. 570-1949 if you want to play. Do I have it? Yes, I do.
I'm ready to go. Oh, great. But now I've asked for people to call. Yep. I was just thinking that. It's okay. I'm the dumbest person. I go, this isn't going to work. Yeah, no, it's not. No, it isn't. Blame producer in there. Jay. Let's blow through him. We'll do it. Yeah, let's get him. Just go ahead and get him. And then we'll play Mitty Madness. Play it where it lies. Yeah. Yeah. Hit it where it lies, pal. Yeah, maybe when we get to it, let's take that and we'll play. Right? Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what we're talking about. Can you guys see the scrambled egg all over my face? Yeah, I don't know what we're talking about. Let me wipe that off for you. Thanks. 570-1949. Hi, Mikey. Hi, I'm Ron Burgundy. I'm... Ron Burgundy? He pointed. Producer Jay. He did? I was asking because somebody was already calling. I said, did he? Did he? I'm not a mind reader. Oh, because you're talking about your tattoo on your arm. Yes. Yes. Anyway, what's going to wear Jamie's blood? Yeah, I'll wear her blood. Since we've got people on the line, should we let... M1 Jim, you there? Yeah, I'm here. Why were you calling, Jim? I was calling because I heard the word bicep. There you go, buddy. There you go.
That's why I said I had egg on my face. Because we were playing Mitty Madness. We needed callers. We were asking for people to call, and then we did this. But, hey, you want to play Mitty Madness? You've already won. Charge your tickets to see the Bears. But would you like to also play Mitty Madness? Because you can. I'll give it a shot. Okay, cool. I'm going to play you a song, and if you know it, I just need you to yell out your name, okay? Okay. All right, here we go. You know it? Is it Clifford? It is Glycerine. Very well done. One of the best songs of all time. I thought I knew it, and I thought it was Glycerine. Glycerine. Glycerine. Hey, you're a double winner. Hang on the line, okay? Sounds great. Thank you. You got it. 570-1949. Give us a call. We're playing Mitty Madness, and what we do is we give you 30 seconds of a song that is being played through a stupid-sounding organ.
If you could tell us what it is, you get 30 seconds to be able to, you win. It's that easy. I've got tickets to see LCD Sound System this Wednesday, October 14th at the Remac. And tickets go on sale this Friday, August 6th. There you go. Win them before you can buy them. That's right. M1 Squeaky Farts from San Diego is on the line. What up? How you doing? I'm good. He made his own little fart noise. Every time. Are you ready to do this? You know that. All right, you got 30 seconds. Here we go. Do you know Squeaky Farts? Would that be Garbage Stupid Girl? That is correct, dude. Very, very good. Very well done, bro. Hang on the line. You got it. You get to go see LCD Sound System. And let's do one more. Let's do one more. Let's get M1 Ziggy. You there, Ziggy? Yeah, man. How's it going? Good. Okay, you know how to play the game, right? I sure do. 30 seconds to determine what this is. That was a good one. Hang on the line, dude. You're going to see LCD sound system. Hang on the line, okay? All right, man. Thanks. Let's see. Did you guys know that Ice-T had gotten arrested? Yeah. They got arrested and it really wasn't for anything serious. Ripped off lemonade.
You know, just... In fact, after hearing about it, Sienna, doesn't it sound like it was kind of a misunderstanding? Yeah, I mean, it's one of the many things. Rappers, it's just, you know, that's what they go through. Here's what happened. Ripping off lemonade. You know what it is? You deal with a lot of cops, and, you know, you end up with that one bad apple that wants to go in. It's mostly been cool. It was just this one... Oh, by the way. Who's chick? Yeah, by the way. You love, you love, you love. Where is he? Disneyland? The voice that you're hearing, along with... Iced tea is Coco. Who's Coco? You don't know Coco? She's got big fake you-know-whats. She's all about the celebrity guys. She's just a socialite? No. She's just a fake broad. I mean, when you see them, you're like, oh my gosh. Maybe I look her up right now. Yeah, maybe you do. And I ain't been in handcuffs in 15 years, so it was crazy, you dig? You dig. Basically, he took me to jail because he could. Wow. He found something in the computer called an insurance lapse from 2008. He could have wrote me a ticket, but he got a chance to arrest me. He told me, I know who you are. What do you think? It wasn't, it was like a mistake. It was an insurance lapse. He says, he says the guy could have wrote him a ticket.
He got lost in the system because he moved from New York to New Jersey. Oh, see, I had heard that he was driving on a suspended license as a whole nother thing. See, that's what. In July. I'm just going off what he is giving as the explanation. On my license. So I was outraged because I'm like, come on, son. I mean, I done broke the law in my life. And now you coming at me on this, you know, which was petty. So they took me in. TMZ knew within 20 minutes. I was back on the streets. But now I got to go to court and prove my innocence because I had insurance in New York and New Jersey. So you're saying, Sienna, it was more than insurance. It was a suspended license he was caught driving with in July. It was like July 20th. Then you get in trouble for that. You get in trouble for a suspended license. The real drama was... Oh, I don't know, Sienna. I think that those might be natural breasts. I had to find a picture of Coco to show them. She is the devil. Could not be more in. moved from New York to New Jersey, and that made them have a mistake. Are you serious, Woods? In, all the way. No. A thousand percent in. There's worse ones. It's clown-like. Yeah. It's clownish. That's her. He has bigger boobs than she does. No. I think she even went down. Ridiculous. She's smoking hot. No, she isn't, Woods. You really do. Maybe you go back to glasses. Yeah.
She's amazing. Okay, I got to get out of here because I keep looking at boobs. Ridiculous. Hey, how did this lady alert the police of a home invasion by using her toes? I'll have to tell you when we come back. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. You've got to go. Call 570-1949. Here comes the best part. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. You guys care about the rules? More of The Mikey Show. Show coming up in minutes. Celebrate on FM 94.9.
Listen up, San Diego. Prospect Bar & Grill brings you Prospect Live. San Diego's Thursday night spot for open mic and live music. This is your chance to show San Diego what you've got. Open mic sign-ups at 9 p.m. Thursday, August 5th, Prospect Live features the Chula Vista Soldier Club and DJ Chuck Prada and drummer Harley right in the mix. $3 Dos Equis and $5 You Call It's All Night. The Chula Vista Soldier Club, this Thursday night at Prospect Bar & Grill. Located at 1025 Prospect Street, upstairs next to Sushi on the Rock. For more info, go to prospectbar.com. This is a bar flight promotion. The Ultimate Fighting Championship presents UFC 117, Silva vs. Sonnen. The number one middleweight contender, Chael Sonnen. I'm not here to be number two. I'm here to be number one. I don't celebrate silver medals. I'm here for 12 pounds of gold and I'm going to get it on August 7th. Looks to dethrone the most dominant champion of all time, Anderson the Spider Silva. Anderson wants a fight. He just found one. He's finally going to fight the number one contender. No one has come close. to defeating the best pound-for-pound fighter in the world. I acknowledge that he's a fantastic fighter. He is the champion, but I am the best. Plus, John Fitch takes on Tiago Alves. Tequila Casadores presents UFC 117, Silva vs. Sonnen, live Saturday, August 7th from Oracle Arena in Oakland, California, only on pay-per-view.
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This report is brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners, San Diego Toyota dealerships have a 2495 lube oil and filter replacement for United States Armed Forces members and veterans, including your immediate family. See your dealer for details. Lots of slowing this morning, different spots. We'll start you off on the 52 westbound Convoy Street. You're going to be backed up here for a while. Speeds are about 25 miles an hour. A little better here on the 163 southbound at Washington. Streets, speeds, I'll get it out of there. Speeds are up to about 40 miles an hour. And the 805 northbound between Balboa Avenue, Claremont Mesa Boulevard also delays here. This report, it is brought to you by REMAX in the market to buy or sell a home. REMAX agents, they've got the experience it takes to get the job done. Visit REMAX.com today. Nobody sells more real estate than REMAX. Outstanding agents, outstanding results. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego. Lincoln Financial Radio Station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't like rain. I like sunshine. Lauren. If you don't use it, you lose it. Woods. I got one word for you, dude. Get Zienna. I was a really good student. And Jay. Please grow up. On FM 94.9. This is an interesting email or text. Don't know which it is. Mikey Show.
My boyfriend and I have what is called an open relationship. And so do a lot of my friends, and some of them are, in fact, married couples. We love each other very much and get along great, but sometimes we just have needs that the other, for whatever reason, will not or cannot meet. Swing it up real sweetly. We have a series of rules in place, and it's worked for... more than a year for us and some of my married friends that do this that have been married for years. These are some of the rules that we have. Rule one, never in our home or bed. Rule two, call and let your other half know that you're going to be coming home late. Oh. Rule three, never sleep with them slash spend the night with them. You must come home that night. I don't even know what to say. You guys on board with these? No. I don't even know. I'm nauseous. What would you say afterwards? So how was it? Just go ahead. You know? Where were you? I'm going to guess that the proper etiquette is that you don't speak of it. Don't ask, don't tell. Which is quite possibly the saddest thing. I hope using protection is one of the rules on there. Me too. I really do. Yeah, me too. Above all else. No, you can't do it.
Well, you know, I'm going to start from the beginning. It says, we love each other very much and get along great. Well, that's good. But sometimes we just have needs that the other, for whatever reason, will not or cannot meet. Yeah, that's called marriage. See, in marriage or in a relationship, you're going to have times where the other will not. Or cannot meet your needs. At that point, what should happen is the other person should do their best to meet your needs. You know? And that way, you're not slaying people. Maybe talk it out. Yeah. Maybe talk it out. Maybe talk it out. Not between the sheets with someone else. Yeah. You know what? You know what? Listen, babe. You're not into the same stuff I'm into. But.
The good news is I love you. And we get along. And we get along. You know what? We both love Scorsese films. They both maybe love having an open relationship. And so here's what I think we should do. Because we both love Scorsese. We both love to cook. And we get along so good. In fact, I love you. So what I think I'm going to do is I'm going to slay four girls tonight. And then I'll make sure. That I, because I'm not rude, I will make sure that I am home by midnight. Lest I turn into a pumpkin. I think, you know, and here's the deal. I'm married. I'm not a swinger. Could never envision myself being a swinger at all. Like, the thought of it skeeves me out to no end. Just skeeves me out. I couldn't be a swinger. In their mind, they think that it's working for them. I don't see.
And this is me being whatever. I'm not trying to be judgmental. I don't think it's going to last. I don't think it can possibly last. I agree. They may go walk around right now and go, man, this works for us, dude. And they're looking at each other going, man, this really works. But I liken it to the fact that if you've ever been in a relationship where two people drank a lot together. You guys ever been? You have a great time then. I used to drink a lot, man, when I was younger. And the girl I dated drank a lot. And we were like, isn't this the greatest, man? Like, we get hammered together. And, dude, it takes its toll after a while. It takes its toll after a while. And what you think is such a great lifestyle that's working for you, in the end, it's going to grate on you, man, and it's going to break you down. And that's what happened to me. Yeah. Does that make sense? It makes complete sense. Yeah. And, you know, you said something really interesting there. You said, listen, I'm not being judgmental. I thought about myself while you said that, and I thought, I think I am. No, and I wasn't saying you were. No, no, no, no. I know that. I know that. But the reason that I thought that about myself is because I realized that I have applied a very negative connotation to the term judgmental. Right. But I'm reevaluating that. I'm reevaluating the word judgmental because it would be one thing.
If I were to not want to be friends with said person. Right. Okay. It's another thing entirely, I think, though, for me to hear the facts and make a judgment. Okay. Meaning I'm at a red light. I see a raccoon in front of my car. The light turns green. I make a judgment call. I could slam my foot into the accelerator. Or I can make another judgment call and say, maybe I'll wait for the raccoon to walk by. It's my call. But one way or the other, I'm making a judgment. I am, in fact, guilty of being judgmental because I am making a judgment call. I've heard the rules. Never in our home or bed. Call and let your other half know that you're going to be coming home late or never sleep with them. So I spend the night with them. You must come home that night. I've heard the facts. And my judgment is. Yeah. That's my judgment. I think unhealthy is the greatest, greatest word for that. Well, what about the day when one of them comes home with an STD? Yeah. That's what I'm talking about. Because that's what goes around now. Exactly. What about the day that somebody comes home and what about the time that the guy goes and meets up with a girl and he does his thing and he's on his way home and he goes, yeah, I always enjoy doing that, but I really enjoy doing that one. That one.
was like something stood out. There was this chemistry. And hey, it's inevitable that it's going to happen. That makes my mouth water. And the minute that he doesn't want to sleep, he's like, you know what? I don't feel like it tonight. With her, she's going to be like, what's the matter? Who did he meet? I don't do it for him anymore. I mean, totally. Well, listen, here's the thing. The last thing that Rebecca and I got into it about was Probably something to do with that goofy mirror in our bathroom. It was not swinging, for the record. It was not swinging. It was not swinging. It was not swinging. We were not arguing about being swingers. No, no, no. But for the record, the last argument that we got into was probably something about that mirror or something, okay? If your argument is based on the following, the rule is that you come home. And it's Saturday morning at nine and you're just coming home. I think we're into a whole different type of argument. We're in the upper echelon. We're in the upper echelon of argument. Imagine like going to your friend and being like, listen to what he did. He was out sleeping with this girl last night and I'm totally fine with that. But I was like, dude, be home before midnight. He comes in at 9 a.m. What would you do? Like imagine having that. And your girlfriend's like. Just staring at you like you're.
I have three heads. No, I have three sums, not three. And what if your friend is of like mind and goes, I know, Josh did that last week. I was so mad. Freaking idiots. Like, the least that they could do is just come home. Like, I don't care. Sleep with 20 girls in one day if you want, but just come home. That's what I said to Josh. I was like, Josh, if you do that one more time, I'm serious. Gosh. I'm going to say don't do it again. Men are pigs. Men are pigs. I mean, I'm trying to see both sides, and it's so hard to see the other side. It's really hard. But it's like, I mean, there has to be some couples out there that it really does work for both of them. And they have to be the exception, though. Yeah, I mean, they have to be. A huge exception. Unicorns. But for this to be something that we hear about, and it's really, like, not that uncommon. You know, listen. I mean, I believe that we have enough things that pose. themselves as an issue for us in relationships? Yeah. We do. We have enough stuff that poses itself as an issue in our relationships. Being home after slaying a girl that night, you know. Gross.
I would be like, get that thing away from me. Yeah. Dirty. Maybe boil that thing before you get in the bed. Do you remember on MySpace, they gave you the relationship status and Swinger was even on there? Yeah. Remember, like, people would put Swinger on their MySpace page as their relationship status. And I'm sitting here thinking right now, like, really? Like, I saw people doing it as a joke. As a joke. But, like, are you looking at it like, oh, that was a swinger too. Send him a message. You know Captain Buzzkill's going to call in and be like, you guys are too uptight about sex. About swingers or whatever. And you know what, man? That's it. You know how I know I'm getting older? Because now I'm like, yeah, absolutely not. Nobody's touching my wife but me. Yeah. It grosses me. It's like, you know, yeah, for 20 minutes of pleasure or whatever, it's going to be the worst thing that you ever did. I would be like, take a shower before you even get out of my sight and never talk to me again. Okay, so how did the lady alert the police, Sienna, of the home invasion by using her toes? This is a woman from Atlanta. She was at her house and a burglar came in.
tied her up to her headboard on her bed, and he was there for nearly an hour talking to her. He hit her with the side of his gun on the head, injured her head, and then he left. Somehow he left. He took her car, her cell phone, and a lot of other items, and this woman was sitting there, you know, after all of this had happened, and her... laptop was in reach of her feet and she was able to grab her laptop, scoot it towards her, turn it on with her toes and looked online and her boyfriend was online and was typing help with her toes. Her boyfriend called the 911 and the police were there in minutes. Amazing. Isn't that insane? Amazing story. I know. Did they catch the guy? No, they don't have a lead on him yet. I know. I'll get him. Woodsy, I got one for you. Okay. What is the best male invention of all time? Now, it could be anything. It could be Martin Scorsese. It could be a kegerator. What is the best male invention of all time? Oh, wow, he's got a look on his face. He's looking dirty. Hey, listen, you can say what you believe. I'm not saying anything dirty. Aren't you? My gosh, Mikey. You saw the kid on the spot real good.
ESPN, probably. ESPN is a great guy. It's pretty great. What about the internet? Guys like Maxim. Nah. No? I like Maxim. You're not a Maxim guy? It's okay. I mean, I buy it at airports. What about Playboy? Like, it's perfect airplane. Like, I go to the airport today, I'll be buying a Maxim, a Rolling Stone, and a GQ. And it's bad, but not too bad. Yeah, it's bad, but it's not too bad. If Playboy didn't have the naked girls, I'd read the articles. The freaking articles are great, are they not? That's not a bit. No, it's not a bit. Really? They have really good. good authors in there. How do you know it? Yeah. Because my friend Bark Malin is 38 years old and still has a subscription to Playboy. Oh my gosh. I'm crapping you negative. He does. I'm crapping you negative. Wow. You're going to try to start that? Oh. You're going to try to start that term?
No, I stole it from a movie, but I love it. I've been wanting to say it for about six weeks. So many guy friends I have, they've got a stack of them in their bathroom when I go to use it, and I'm just like, really? Playboys? Yeah. I think that's something you need to hide no matter what. Every time I go to Phoenix to visit my brother. They're out? Well, when you go to the restroom, he has a, sorry if you're listening online, I won't say which brother, Steve. In Arizona. In Arizona. Has a brown, like, basket that you would put pillows in or something like that. And it's just ringed with Playboys. Yeah. Like he makes them try and look nice. Decorative. Decorative. Good to see that you were doing the decorative design with your... See, my friends, they leave it in, like, a pile with water stains all over. That is so gross. My brother is classy. He classes it up. So is Bauman. Bauman has a coffee table, and he's got, like, the UT football program, okay, for the current year. Then he's got, underneath that is GQ. Oh, it's all fanned out? It's fanned out. And under that is the most recent issue of Playboy. Oh, gosh. Big bottle of lotion. Jay has said two things all day long. Both.
So inappropriate. If you were to take the two things that you said today. And you're being inappropriate. And you were to somehow put them together. Your jaw drops open. No. And you go, oh, wow, Jay. You'd have to know what I was talking about. Hey, everybody, it's Jay. But I got to tell you, man. And every time I go to his house, first thing I go for, I'm like. Oh, who's that? Jenny McCarthy? I'm in. I just started flipping through. But isn't that embarrassing if you were to have a girl over and that's just out? No. I'm a classy guy. I've got a classy boy. In my mind, I would not be excited by that. It's bad when they live alone because I feel like a lot of my guy friends, when they bring girls home, the girl just assumes it's the roommates. They're like, oh, dirty roommate. You live alone. There's no question. I live alone, young lady. And I have them in my house. What would you do? Creep. And what did they do before there was the athletic supporter with the cup? I don't know. Oh, wow. The cup is a good invention. Kind of important. Cup's a real good invention. Very important. I play men's league baseball. I wear one in the outfield. Still. Really? Yeah, because of a grounder that pops up. The whole day. Really? Yep. Do they wear them in, like, soccer games? Oh, I'm sure.
No, that's hard to run with. I think wears them to work, you know, just in case. I have one on right now. Do football players wear them? Yes. Everybody does. You have to. In fact, we've talked to football players that say at the bottom of piles. Oh, yeah. That's what those dudes are doing. Oh, yeah, I know that. Gouging eyes, biting. But, like, soccer, that's the first thing they do when there's, like, a corner kick or something. Still hurts a little bit. I would think soccer, no, because of all the running. Yeah. No, you have a jock. Your jock holds it up. Is that what a jock strap is? Yeah, it's support. Do you wear regular underwear with a jock strap? No, I don't. You would need, like, some spandex. Here's what I do. You ready? I'll give you the whole routine. Oh, well. I go jock strap first. Nude. Jock strap, right? Aren't you supposed to? Yeah. Right. Well, here's what I do. I don't know. Jock strap is a cup with, like, a strap. No. Yeah, it's a thing around here. It's a triangle. Open butt cheeks. Assless cheeks. Okay, okay, okay. With two little straps up here that hold it together. Mikey's rolling his eyes. Then I slide the cup in. Is there a pocket for it? Yeah, it's a pouch. And then you get it all ready, and then I put my sliding shorts over. Oh. And it holds it all real sweetly. What about when you run? Doesn't the plastic hit your legs? Yeah, that's what I mean. Like soccer's a lot of running. It's good. It's tight. You guys like how I'm...
Pretending I know. Yeah. Even though I'm not athletic. Have you ever won a cup? In high school when I was on the football team that I never played on. Did anyone ever put a jack strap on your head? No. Thank God for that. I thought you were going to say yes. He would have never recovered. Yeah, and never recovered emotionally. That happened. M1, Scott, Detroit from San Diego. Are you there? Detroit. Just putting a vote up for the man groomer. I think it's got to be the best thing ever invented for guys. It's great. The word? Man groomer is. Is that Garrett? Is this Garrett? No, Scott, I promise. Oh my gosh, it sounded like Garrett and he said Detroit. I know. The man groomer is great. Man groomer is, it looks like a giant wand. Maybe I want one. Oh dude, they're rad. And you take it and you can, you know, they're like a, they bend. If you have any patches of hair on your back, that's it. That's awesome. That's all you can use it for? Well, then I got this other thing that Steve-O turned me on to. My brother, he goes, you got to get one of these. And he was 100% right. And it's called, I think it's also the man groomer. Man groomer comes in a couple of different deals. Varieties. A variety of different ways to use. And, you know, if you're a guy. Take care of business. Take care of business. But that is a great dude invention.
I would ask Jay what his was, but I'm terrified, terrified, terrified to ask Jay. Like a Swiss army knife. Chris actually said a good one. The toilet. Toilet is great. Yeah, it is good. Toilet is great for man. Mankind. Jay just pushing the envelope real good. I think it's innocent. I don't know what's going on here. Brett Favre. Favre. He says that he's going to retire. Does he? I know. Something tells me there may be an announcement. What's he said? That they are reportedly, the Vikings, are offering him how much? I've read $20 million a year for the next year. And then I've also read $1 million a game. So I guess if you factor in preseason, that's a million bucks a game. Why is he getting paid a million a game? He's bred far. He was once. No, dude. He was great last year. He was money last year. He's still got it. He still does. If they can fix his ankle, dude, watch out. I agree 100%. Rumor floating around that Brett Favre is getting ready to retire. That means he's playing again. Yeah. I think he's going to retire this time. He said he wants to spend more time with his great-great-grandchildren.
You think he shouldn't retire? No. You know, I tell you, he is great. But there were signs that he's getting up there. Like last season, he would go in the huddle and go, what did I come in here for? That's funny. That's funny. Woods was doing fake laugh the other day. Went to a sandwich place. And this guy, this guy was very, I don't know, presumptuous? Is that it? Yeah, that's a good word. He... Made a lot of conversation with Woods about everything that Woods wanted and was ordering. Yeah. But he made like, oh, pickles. You know what's the best kind of pickle? Oh, just. Heinz pickles. Do you get the dill or do you get the, you know? Just trying to do bits with me, I guess. And I was. So he just for a moment, the guy, you know, turned to do something. And Woods gave me the. The eye roll. Yeah, like.
You see what's happening over here? And I already knew. He was dying laughing. I already knew Woods was, I don't know, irritated, whatever. But as Woods walks away, I don't remember what the joke that he made to you. But he made some, you know, half... Corny joke? Corny joke. And Woods gave the... Why do you have to be mean, Woods? Well, nobody knows, though. You don't know. You think that's his laugh. I would think you're messing with me, jerk. Yeah, well, feast on this. Wow. Maybe don't talk. Maybe just take my order. Give me my change back. All right. Why is the FBI threatening Wikipedia with legal action? We'll have to tell you all about it. Coming up next. The Mikey Show now. 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. The FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion. Supported by Miller Lite and Scion. On the main stage, Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros. The Rogue Wave. The Wigs. Delta Spirit. On the Casbah Local 94.9 stage. The Nervous Records. The Silent Comedy. The Burning of Rome.
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That's a great one. He's saving lives real good. He's just saving it up. Yeah. Saving it up real good. The Fix. That's a good tune. Oh, I know what we haven't done. It's a little YouTube video of a friend of mine named Lauren O'Brien. Sing along with us. Oh, my gosh. She's talking to children, right? Turning her mic off so she can't comment. Oh, my gosh. She's red right now. She's be red. She is a color of red. I'm angry. She's scarlet. Herd's atmosphere. Herd's atmosphere. Herd's atmosphere. We couldn't find it. I couldn't find it. I had given up on trying to find this YouTube video of Lauren. And it's hard to find for good reason. I don't know how. And when Chris found it. It's a YouTube video of? It's Chris. YouTube video of Lauren doing a bit with her sister. She wrote, produced a play for kids, right? Yep. And it was called Mermaids Sunny and Sky.
And she played a mermaid. Which one were you? Which one were you? I was Sky. And Sunny was your sister. Who's shredding up there on the guitar? You guys are dressed as mermaids? Yep. And what was the age group? What are we talking about kids? Like preschool up until... The kids here were up to fifth grade, but they were like... Too cool, some of them. I bet they enjoyed it. I was just going to say. Yeah, more up to, like, maybe, like, second grade. One of the things that Lauren hadn't considered was that, you know, children might be afraid of sharks. And so, you know, at some point, she came to the realization, oh, my goodness, you know, this isn't really. That's why we had the baby shark in there, to soften it up. Who's holding the guitar? My sister. I usually play the keyboard, but in this one. There weren't enough outlets and stuff, so we're like, oh, let's pre-record that part, and I'll just use the tambourine. You just work with what you have, you know what I mean? Stomp your feet, snap your fingers, whatever you got. Oh, my goodness. This was off-Broadway. Yeah. It was not. Kids are looking around. Are they? The fifth-grade kids are like, I've got drag in this friggin' assembly. Really? You got girls that can be French, and I'm in here? That's your girl, Lauren. Lauren is...
She's about to cry? She's so embarrassed right now. How did they know the words? Because we did it once, and then my magical editing skills, we did it again, and they knew the words the second time around. That's great. Now you know how it feels like to walk a mile in my shoes, kid. What do you mean? Getting embarrassed real good. Some hidden audio. Oh, oh. I didn't know that she did the exaggerated arm movements. Wizard sleeves, yes. Wizard sleeves. Mermaid sleeves. Is this on our website yet? No. We don't have the rights from my sister to post this. It's fine. We'll take our chances. Maybe it's public. It will be up in like five minutes. Maybe it's YouTube. Oh, yeah. It's on YouTube, so it's public. Maybe it's public. MikeyShow.com. Yeah. Bye today. Oh, yeah. In the next 15 minutes. Maybe we make that R-I-T-H-T. I was going to tell you, though, Lauren, you and your sister look very pretty. You do? Thank you. That's one thing I noticed as I watched it last night. I go...
Oh, honey, look at this. It's L-O-B. She goes, is that L-O-B? I go, yeah, that's L-O-B. Oh, boy. Looking a little hot, isn't she? Yeah. Looks good, huh? We had tights on. You guys look very pretty. Where's the sharks? Maybe shut your mouth, Steven. Really, dear? Really, dear? The sharks come on later. How cute is she? Yeah. The sharks come on. Like you didn't watch it, did he? Oh. I haven't seen it yet. Welcome to our show. Our pirate friend is about to come out. Oh, wow. Who's that? He'll be his next boyfriend. Oh, my gosh. Oh, boy. But I think they've fallen asleep. We're having some technical difficulties. That got Sienna. That one got Sienna. That one got Sienna. No way. The kids loved it. It got her real good. The kids loved it.
They took pictures with the sharks afterwards. Terrified pictures. Pictures of children crying standing next to a shark. Mike, if you actually had listened to the audio, there's a part where I come on as the father shark and I go, who are you? And the kids go, who? Tell me, okay, why? LB, did you film this from Cleveland? Because it's a bit far away. I tried to tell you. LB, why? Why what? I need to know again why. Why? Why? This is we're watching this. Why is this done? What? Yeah. Why did you do this? The message was it was a message about respecting other people's property, respecting the ocean. Great messages, by the way. Yeah. Yeah. And what was the idea? We'll sell this. We were going to go. We had some biters, too. Get it? Because they were short. We had some biters. We're going to go. It's a very lucrative industry. Absolutely. Kids stuff. Kids stuff. Sure. Ask the guys at Yo Gabba Gabba how lucrative it is. This guy's bank. Yeah. But it didn't. No. We were going to pick back up.
with it maybe in like a year or so, but then... Well, one of the sharks mated. One of the sharks mated with her husband's shark. No, no, no. And we're going to have a baby shark. She was a mermaid, okay? Oh, she was a mermaid. And a merman. A merman. Got a visit from the stork. Yep. A.K.A. a seahorse. That's right. Merman got her real good. Yeah. When you guys were done, you and your sister with the shows, were you guys like, oh, my gosh, I love how you did that one line. We were like, oh, gosh, it's really blue to that one part. It was exhausting, but it was exhilarating because that was our words coming out. There was one scene where my sister, she was supposed to be kind of like Goldilocks, and she's sleeping like the mermaid, and she decided to sleep right in front of the amp. And I was like, and doing the shark voice. And it started to reverberate. And it was turned up so that the kids at the back of it. So she just collapsed wherever she collapsed. And she was right in front of the amp. Terrible. Yeah. Sienna. I love it. Good job. Why is the FBI threatening Wikipedia with legal action? Because Wikipedia has FBI's seal on their site. Oh, and you can't do that? Apparently not. However, Wikipedia says. Better take it off our site then, huh? No.
I guess it's on a lot of sites. That's what Wikipedia is saying. And they are like, look, we have consulted with other people. We do not need to take it down, and we're not going to take it down. Maybe just take it down. They're prepared to go to court and argue. Is it because they don't want it to get, like, replicated? Yeah, I mean, it's FBI's legal seal. Yeah, so you're Wikipedia. You're like, if the FBI comes to me, and they're like, hey, man, do this. I'm like, okay. You got it, man. I'm not a big rule follower, but when it's those guys, I'm like. You got it, man. Whatever you need. Yeah, maybe don't get those guys on your bad side. Yeah. Who says to the FBI, why don't you take a hike? Wikipedia. Wikipedia is not taking it down. Keep your eyes on your own paper. How come the sea otter population is decreasing here in California? Why is that happening? Probably more sharks. Sharks. Because of the weather. Oh, they don't like it here. Yeah, they're saying that because of the number of human and natural factors, including heavy storms, infectious disease, and, yes, shark attacks. There was a 3.6% drop from last year's average. Woods' day just left his body. The number of little otter... Pups? I almost said otter pops. I stopped myself. I was like, otter pups has dropped by 11% last year. Otter pops. Wonder when pupping season is. Pupping? Yeah. Or popping? Pupping season is around Thanksgiving, I want to say. It starts from then until May.
Don't ask me why I know that. We hit the U.S. sandcastle competition in IB this weekend. Yeah. See you there. People come from around the country to participate in this, Mike. I'm being serious. What if a big wave comes in? You know, I thought about that because they build on Saturday. And these are people that are like really getting after it with the sand. And they're building sandcastles. And they're getting after it inside the sandcastles. They're so big. The next day on Sunday is when the judging occurs. So what if you were the D? Like I would have been with 15 that would have snuck out there three in the morning. No, I guarantee it. Security. Just poured hot water on all of it. Crazy security. They have guys out there with M16s. Absolutely. Waiting for, you know, yahoos like you. Little idiots like me, my friends. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. They hire mermaids like L.O.B. to stand out there and protect. Oh, I already played you. I already played you. Get out of here, you. I'll tell you what I do have. I want to go to the Sandcastle thing. I may go check it out this year. You should. Number one rock song in the country is Linkin Park, The Catalyst. Screw loose to go in for that sort of thing. Call 570-49. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I got the world by the tail. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes. Yeah, boy. On FM 94.9.
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This is our best radio offer ever. Get your risk-free 60-day trial of new proactive plus two free extras. Show acne who's boss. Be proactive. Call 1-800-277-1134. That's 1-800-277-1134. Don't miss California Saving. Kohl's biggest back-to-school sale this Friday through Sunday. Get an extra 10% off everything only at Kohl's California stores. See store-free details. Kohl's. Expect great things. KBZD's Indiana Lincoln Financial Radio Station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I get along better with women than I do with men. Lauren. I'm very clumsy. Woods. I like to grease the maitre d's from time to time. Zienna. I'm an expert golfer. I bet. And Jay. If it's broken, there's a 99% chance that I can fix it. On FM 94.9. Welcome back. So tonight's 8 o'clock album is Frank Black's self-titled album. And you can check that out. It's going to be real good. It's a Mikey show. Welcome back. There are five people on the Mikey show. Myself, Woods, Lauren O'Brien, Sienna, Jay, and we also have a phone screen. It's gross. It's gross. That's right. Sienna's favorite. She loves it. It's gross. It's so dude in my face. So.
Oh my gosh. Sorry, I was trying to test out how heavy my bag was going to be. Who are you? She's like modeling over here. I was like, wow, I think L.O.B.'s ready to go. She's got her bag on and ready. I wanted to see if I could handle it. My back hurts. Got your New Orleans t-shirt on. I've got my thumb out with a sign that says New Orleans or bust. I want to give you guys maybe my hidden recorder for the plane of the three of you clowns. Can we pull the curtain back? Can we talk about this? I brought one. You have one? I've got one. Okay, good. So they're flying southwest where you can pick your own seat. And Woods goes, so, you know, how many rows do they have? I said, well, they have two rows. And I said, and Woods goes, how many on each side? I said, three on one side, two on the other. And Woods goes, so, because it's him. You mean seats? Seats on the airplane. Okay. And because it's going to be Woods, Jay, and Lauren, Woods goes, how are we going to? I said, who's getting middle? Who's sitting where? And Lauren goes, completely serious. Completely serious. Lest anyone listening think this is a bit. Completely serious goes, are we sitting together? We don't have to. We don't have to. We don't have to put three adults in one. I said, what if we all just sat on the ends? And Wood's poor face.
He was devastated. He's like, okay, great. Nobody wants to sit in the middle. If you have a choice, you're going to take the aisle or the window. He looks at me and he goes, weird. Weird, yeah. Yeah, but if you sit in the middle and you're sitting between two people you know, I would just lean against one of them. Maybe you stay in a different hotel, too. You know what, guys? This is what happens to me. I've done this before. Will you have breakfast or a meal with Woods? Yeah, but this is what the guys do. I'm already claustrophobic, so on the plane, guys, they put their knees out, they put their legs in my space, and then I end up all shriveled up with no armrest. That is true. And you know Lauren's going to be the one ending up in the middle because she's this girl. Because you've got to ride B when you're a girl. We're not sitting together. And then you get your space invaded, and I'm like, sweet. Let me tell you something. If I was on that airplane, I would talk your ear off for five hours. I know you would. I wouldn't stop. I like the talking. With someone I know. Well, I'm going to put... Jay, do you have a little splitter? We can watch Modern Family together on my laptop. I do. I brought a splitter. Bring a splitter. We'll watch Modern Family. I got it. Me and my boy. Wait, okay. You really have a hidden recorder? I have a recorder. I have my one. I'll take yours if you want. If yours is better.
I don't know. You know I'll lose it or pawn it or something. Okay, don't pawn it. Pawn it for cab money. I would let you use it. Okay. But I'm telling you that you guys can get some gold. Oh, there's no question we can get some gold. I don't know. Maybe I'll leave it with Jay. Give it with Jay. Because Lauren and Woods are the ones to have the gold. Betty White was on Jay Leno last night. Had no idea she was up for this job. Listen to this. To be the first woman on the Today Show, correct? Well, I was a California girl, lived out here, and I went back there, and I would do the Jack Parr show, and I would do the various guest shots and game shows. But they asked me if I would do this morning show that they had, and the Today Show, actually.
I said, no, I can't. Well, they made all kinds of offers. What if we put you up at the St. Regis Hotel and we'll fly you home every weekend and we can do that? And I still couldn't quite see that as a way. So I thanked them very much. And they finally had to get somebody and they had to make do with Barbara Walters. Wow. That's incredible. Betty White was offered the first job ever on the Today Show as a woman. turned it down, said, no, I don't want to do it. Throwing money at her, throwing all kinds of perks at her. Nope, don't want to. Has there ever been a woman like Betty White or a man? I mean, someone that's older and everyone loves, is hilarious, goes on SNL, kills it. You know, like she's unstoppable. I know. She's awesome. I like that story, though, because it worked out the best for both of them. Yep. It was funny because the other day we heard that Sylvester Stallone was offered the job.
of Han Solo. Incredible. In Star Wars. Auditioned. Oh, he auditioned? Auditioned. No, he was like the first, their first choice. He was the first choice? Yeah. I thought it was just a different movie. No, I'm pretty sure it was that he's the first choice. Well, believe me, if we're wrong, we're going to know about it in about five minutes. Trust me. Less than that. Yeah. Just assume it is a Wookie. How different would that movie be? Oh, real different. Boy. Tom Selleck was offered the role of Indiana Jones. Would have been amazing. Tom Selleck is amazing. You like Tom Selleck? I love Tom Selleck. Are you kidding? He would have been just as good, I think. Oh, yeah. Really? Yeah. He would have had to shave his mustache. Zero percent. No, the mustache makes him. How could that be true? Because he's not a movie star. I know, but he could have been. Really? Neither was Harrison Ford back then. Besides Quigley Down Under. And he had Stoja. You know, which was just... Phenomenal. Mr. Baseball. Three Men and a Baby. Three Men and a Baby. Harrison Ford had Star Wars. And that's really... Harrison Ford? Indiana Jones. No, Indiana Jones. Before then. Before he did Indiana Jones. First movie he was in was American Graffiti, which was a giant hit. Greatness. He was a witness. Yeah, he's been in a jillion movies. Yeah, it still would have been rad with Tom Selleck. Tom Selleck can do anything. Did you ever see Friends? He was great.
Oh, yeah. That was great on Friends. Didn't he date Monica? Yes. I've never seen Friends, but I know all the Friends stories. I'm not kidding you. I know all the Friends stories. I know a bunch of Seinfeld stories, too. Never seen Seinfeld. Never? But I know a bunch of stories master in my domain. Like, I know all the suit Nazi. I know all the references because I've heard them enough times in life. You're a weird dude. I know. You are a weird dude. I mean, you would love Friends. You're a weird dude. You would love Friends. You are a sad, strange little man. Thank you. Friends started early 90s. Yeah. Sure. And went through all of the 90s, right? Yeah. Never saw it. Hillary, were you a big Friends fan? Loved it. Love Friends. Oh, my God. You're an American. I feel better because I thought everybody was going to call me lame, and now that Hillary said she likes it, I feel like, whew, okay, cool, I'm not lame. But you're also a girl, and I'm not. You know how I know I'm gay? Because I love Friends. I think everybody watched Friends. It's not that you make out with dudes. And I make out with dudes. I think everybody watched Friends, and I think everybody watched Seinfeld. Except me. Except Mike. 570.
194.9 is our number. But anyway, I love those deals of who was originally offered this movie role. Fascinating. Or who was supposed to be in this movie. If you are a fan of the Godfather movies, if you get the trilogy, they have a whole other disc that all it is is extras. And one of the things that they have on there is the auditions for all the different parts in the Godfather. That's so cool. And they did stuff like... They auditioned James Caan instead of playing the role of Sonny. They auditioned him to play the role of Michael. It's played by Al Pacino. And you get to see him in those clothes doing the Michael stuff. You got any more of those big ones that you know? I had a whole list. I know. I've heard a million of them. I can't remember. I'll come up with it. Maybe that's it.
I'll bring that to the meeting. I know one of the Friends ones, Courtney Cox, auditioned to be Rachel. Yeah. She got Monica. 570-1949 is our number. And you can also text us. Our text is 949mikey at gmail.com. A couple things that I have not hit on that I wanted to before we go is that the... whooping cough cases continue to rise in California, which get your kid inoculated if you can. Yes. Six times the total at this time last year. It's... Six times more cases of whooping cough right now. It's crazy epidemic, especially throughout California. I mentioned last week that an infant died from it in San Diego. I mean, I went to my doctor yesterday and I'm about to have a baby. So she says, you know, what's what's going on with whooping cough? When do you want to get your vaccine? And I'm getting it right after the baby's born at the hospital. They're doing it. My husband's getting it. My mom's getting it. Anyone that's going to be around my baby. Maybe I make sure all you guys get it. You know, because I mean, you don't want to mess around with this.
If you asked me to do that, I would. You probably are fine because you have little kids. I mean, it affects you too with the twins. I would too, Sienna. Thank you. Lauren's like, it's really kind of you guys. Lauren has her niece that she's around all the time. Yeah. I mean, she should have it too. If my sister asked me to, but. You're not a big vaccine person though. Yeah. Oh, I called my mom and I said, get my sisters. They're going. Grandma's going. Everyone. Pack up the Bentley. We're all going out of the clinic. We're going to do it. We'll take the limo. You know that. Hollywood's highest paid actresses. Probably not anybody that I think. I would say Angelina Jolie, but I know I'm wrong. She's on the list. She is? How many are we talking? There's one, two, three, four, five, six, ten. Sandra Bullock. What? He looks. He looks at the list. He looks at the list. How has he not gotten pulled aside and yelled at him for this yet? He just looked over. He gives the number one, too. He just looked over at Hillary, and he gave Hillary this look, this head nod that went, I do. You need to pull him aside. Zero percent. Have a talking to. Yeah, you're going to get in trouble. The kid's going to stop doing that. Let me start delivering your sports story.
You asked me that. I don't ask you to guess what they are. Oh, my gosh. Dee's Bryant. Dee's Bryant. Yeah, exactly. From June 2009 to June 2010, in one year, Sandra Bullock made $56 million, the highest paid actress. Second, Reese Witherspoon. Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Aniston, Sarah Jessica Parker, Julia Roberts, Angelina Jolie, Drew Barrymore, Meryl Streep, and Kristen Stewart at the 10 spot with $12 million. Wow. She's only 20 years old. I know. I'm surprised at some of those names. Yeah? Probably not. I'm not. I just didn't think they were big players anymore. Jennifer Aniston, $27 million last year. Cameron Diaz, $32 million. Same with Reese Witherspoon. They're tied. And you know what's really weird? Don't anybody get mad at me. It's just a fact. Jen Aniston doesn't really make hits. No. Her movies are not... I mean, she's beloved. People love Jen Aniston. But her movies don't really make a ton of dough. That's what I'm saying, though. She's got one character down. That makes my mouth water. There's always a lot of publicity behind all of her movies. Because she's in it. And is she dating the co-star? And her arms always look really ripped. Exaggerated hand motions.
I have to say, I like that Jennifer Aniston made more than Angelina Jolie. She did. Yeah, me too. Yeah, $7 million more last year. Do you say you like it because she's a husband-stealer? Because of Brad. Telling Angelina to go down. Team Jen. I'm going to say that right now. We all do. Not all of us. Oh, good. How are you guys? Good. Team Angelina over here. Get out. What do you got going on today? Well, first things first, Bad Religion are putting out a new record on September 28th. I have it. I'm going to play something off it before noon. I'm a long time Bad Religion fan. Hear it before you can buy it. I actually haven't even listened to the song yet. That's cool. Yeah. Preview it, and then I'll play it probably in the 11 o'clock hour, between 11 and noon. Also grab White Stripes, New Broken Bells, and one of our recommended albums for August, this British band called The Heavy, that are great. They're kind of like neo-soul, Black Joe Lewis and the Honey Bears vibe, really fun. Actually, my nickname in elementary school was Black Joe Lewis. The Heavy. The Heavy. It's wonderful. Lovely to tell that Hillary is up next.
and the crew is going to Nolens. So on Monday morning, we'll come back and do it again, but we do have the best of the Mikey Show, and so we will see you again on Monday morning. Mikey Show's out late.