The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 08/17/10
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Tuesday August 17, 2010
Two years later, Prop 8 is back in the news and still stirring up controversy. Ever seen grown men holding hands? Woodsy has, and it still makes him giggle. A huge Great White shark was spotted off the coast by a kayaker and the panic sets in! EH-Hah! A M1 requests LOB slams some sugar and says her laugh is like phone sex (which implies he must know a thing or two about phone sex, a phone sex connoisseur, if you will) and of course the pervert alert alarm is sounded. Hoyle immediately blames Lauren for putting out “subconscious intercourse” vibes on the air! Mel Gibson wrecked himself before checking himself again, this time while sober and nice to the police as he walked away from his totaled car. Hilarious police audio of chasing a naked man on a motorcycle is next. Jay rough talked a hawk that flew into his neighbor’s pad and saved the day. WoS recaps Eli Manning’s pinball imitation on MNF that left him with a cracked melon. Don’t worry Giants fans; he’ll still be able to lick Oreo’s like nobody’s business. The Padres, despite the best record in the NL, are still the Rodney Dangerfield of baseball. The panel talks about reality show straw graspers and the best burger in America which you need to listen to in order to hear Lauren ask “you’ve never had five guys?” Funny English accents abound after audio of a British amnesiac remembers before she forgets. A M1 calls in wondering if it’s ok to date his buddy’s ex who looks like the stoned brunette chick in Twilight. The cinnamon and Saltine challenge begins at 7:30 as Jay shoves a lovin’ spoonful of pure cinnamon powder in his mouth. LOB screams as Jay tries to swallow but blasts sweet smelling fumes out his nose! The Kid sticks a stack of Saltines in his mouth and tries to get them down and whistle before time runs out but can’t do it! Whatever KZBT is paying the janitor, it’s not enough. Out comes the BB gun and even Sienna gets to take one of three shots at Mikey for refusing to participate in the food challenge. You need to listen to the podcasts to hear what happens next! PETA pesters Dodge about “blowing up” a monkey and both videos can be seen at mikeyshow.com. LOB has a friend with a big problem regarding her fiancé moving to Chicago for a job when they’re about to get married next year and the cast discusses the situation with differing opinions. Captain Buzzkill returns to sour the party punch. What is the ultimate male status symbol and what defines a real man? Jay gallops into the studio to take a look at the Miss Universe contestants wearing nothing but body paint. Hoyle’s feral friend from down under is being shipped to the States in time for Independence Jam. The gang tosses around more food challenge ideas.
Bumper Music
| 1. Bleed American by Jimmy Eat World |  |
| 2. Are You Gonna Go My Way by Lenny Kravitz | |
| 3. Lick It Up by Kiss | |
| 4. Alone I Break by Korn | |
| 5. Ramble On by Led Zeppelin | |
| 6. Manic Depression by Jimi Hendrix | |
| 7. Hurts So Good by John Mellencamp | |
| 8. The Only Exception by Paramore | |
| 9. Money Ain’t A Thang by Jay-Z | |
| 10. Some Might Say by Oasis | |
| 11. Don’t Tell Me You Love Me by Night Ranger | |
| 12. Fall To Pieces by Velvet Revolver | |
| 13. Hunger Strike by Temple Of The Dog | |
| 14. Rearviewmirror by Pearl Jam | |
| 15. Heart Shaped Box by Nirvana | |
| 16. Dynamite by Taio Cruz | |
cinnamon and saltine challengesgay marriage californiayes on eight faith debategreat white sharks la jollacalifornia 200 off road race deathsmel gibson car crashstephen slater jetblue reality tvnight for gavin tay sachs fundraisercolombia plane crash miraclestudy men cheat higher earning womencraigslist killer suicideindependence jam music festival
The Mikey Show kicked off with Mikey hyped on tacos and Chipotle, then immediately dove into the cinnamon and saltine challenges, where Mikey refused due to his gastric bypass surgery, forcing Woods and Jay to attempt them—Jay inhaled a massive spoonful of cinnamon that erupted from his nose like a dragon, and Woods struggled through four saltines in 60 seconds before earning three BB gun shots to the belly for failing the whistle test. A major political debate unfolded over California’s gay marriage ruling, with Judge Von R. Walker’s Wednesday deadline overruled by a Ninth Circuit Court stay, prompting Mikey to defend his yes-on-8 vote as a faith issue while denying he’s a bigot, and listeners called in about bro code, ex-girlfriends, and engagement dilemmas involving job offers in Chicago versus staying in San Diego. The broadcast delivered several shockers: a 15-20 foot great white shark spotted near La Jolla kayakers sending swimmers out of the water, a Colombia plane crash with 131 aboard but only one casualty deemed a miracle after a possible lightning strike, and a Dodge commercial controversy where a monkey “explosion” was digitally erased after PETA backlash, plus a Craigs
What happened, in order
Gay Marriage California Rule
Judge Von R. Walker passes gay marriage rule in California with Wednesday deadline, later stayed by Ninth Circuit Court.
Great White Shark La Jolla
15-20 foot great white shark spotted in La Jolla, touched kayaker's boat, lifeguards warn swimmers.
California 200 Off-Road Race Tragedy
Eight people died in off-road race, Bureau of Land Management investigating safety rule violations by promoter.
Mel Gibson Car Crash
Mel Gibson unhurt after crashing Maserati into rocky Malibu hillside Sunday night, non-intentional, no alcohol.
JetBlue Flight Attendant Stephen Slater
Slater gets Howard Bragman as PR rep, 25 reality TV offers circulating, 15 minutes of fame discussion.
Night for Gavin Fundraiser
Fundraiser for 4-year-old Gavin with fatal Tay-Sachs disease at Hensley's Flying Elephant Pub, live auction.
Cinnamon Challenge Jay
Jay inhales massive spoonful of cinnamon that erupts from his nose like a dragon, impressive but painful.
Saltine Challenge Woods
Woods struggles through four saltines in 60 seconds to whistle, fails, gets three BB shots to belly.
Dodge Monkey Commercial
Dodge commercial featuring monkey digitally made invisible after PETA pressure, original showed monkey blowing up.
Colombia Plane Crash Miracle
131 on board Colombia plane crash, one casualty after possible lightning strike, fuselage fracture, landing gear ripped off, deemed a miracle.
Study Men Cheat Higher-Earning Women
Study finds men five times more likely to cheat women who make more money, ego/breadwinner threat.
Craigslist Killer Suicide
Craigslist killer jailhouse suicide on wedding anniversary, pen razor, plastic bag, covered head under blanket.
People mentioned
mikeywoodsylauren o'briensiennajaymatt lauermichellejudge von r. walkerjerry sanderslisa sandersbrent sloppymark sanchezeli manningtom coughlin
31,031 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
Today's what, Tuesday? Look at that. It snuck right up on us. Mikey's show went out and had a little fresh Chipotle yesterday. It's real nice. Real sweet. Had double tacos last night. Did you? Yeah, tacos for dinner, tacos for lunch. Sweet. I feel like you. Yeah, I know. You're fully Mexican. You Mexican-ed out. That's right. My Mexican-ness actually is what defines me. Yeah, I know. That's what I was going to say. You can call us if you want to, 570-1949, or you can text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. We'd love to hear from you. I feel a lot better. I feel like almost 100% better. You look better. You were a little sallow yesterday. Yes, you were. Sallow is a good word. Yeah. I was really trying to get over the whatever it is I have, and I feel like I'm over it, but I know I don't sound it yet.
I still feel like I've, like I sound like I've got some cobwebs up in the pantry. In the belfry? Yeah. But we got, oh my gosh, do we have big news today to talk about? Lots of things happening in the news. 7.30 this morning we're doing the cinnamon and saltine challenge. So ridiculous. Never seen either one of them done. Don't want to. Until we do it at 7.30, yeah. I purposefully have not gone on YouTube because I want to be surprised by it and get a natural reaction out of me. And I'm not doing either one of them. What are you doing? Woodsy said yesterday, we were recording a promo, and Woodsy's like, you're doing one of those, either the cinema, and I said, I'm not doing either one. He said, fine, then you take a BB. I said, no problem with that. Now, you will not put a spoonful of cinnamon in your mouth? No. There's no way? No. And you won't force yourself to eat saltines and try and whistle? No. That's not hard. I can't do things that involve food because I have gastric bypass surgery, and it makes me, in my head, think that there's going to be a problem.
Yeah, well, that makes sense. Of stomach issues. I think you should take three BBs. Yeah, he's taking three. Yeah, that's what it is. He said ABB, but. Yeah. Three. One time. I want to at least shoot him one of those times if I'm eating cinnamon. Oh, yeah, for sure. I mean, a spoonful of cinnamon sounds awful. Awful. Like, imagine. Not cinnamon sugar, just straight up cinnamon, ground cinnamon. I was all set for cinnamon sugar. That would be, I would do that. Hey, did you guys know that a spoonful of sugar helps the melody go down? Or the medicine. I always say the melody. I always say the melody. And I have to be corrected. Melody? Who's this melody girl you're talking about? Mike. And every time I say it. How often do you say that phrase? I've said it in my life a few times. Oh, no. And every single time I get corrected. And every time I say it, I'm like, I got it figured out this time. I feel like I've never even heard that.
You've never seen Mary Poppins? No, I like girls. Beautiful, Jay. Mary Poppins is a classic. Yeah. Saw it when I was a little kid. There's a dude in that movie. I probably did when I was little, but I don't remember it. Dick Van Dyke? Yeah, Dick Van Dyke. It's just fun to say his name. Great. He clicks his heels. It's a very popular movie. I could just twist my ankle. It is really good. Word of the day today is fiesta. Weird. Okay. Word of the day is fiesta. So when you hear the word fiesta worked into a sentence. And it doesn't count if Mikey says party. Right. It needs to be fiesta. Yeah. If you hear fiesta worked into a sentence between now and 10 o'clock, caller number 95701949 wins what, Jay? They win. What do they win? They win tickets to the 4 o'clock Friday to see the soft pack. Nice. All right. So there it is. Big news this morning is that, well, you heard last week that a... U.S. District Judge Von R. Walker. Von R. Walker. That's a tough name to remember. He decided, you know, to pass the gay marriage in California rule. However, they gave until this Wednesday. To be specific, he said that what we had already decided as voters in California,
was unconstitutional. Right, right, right. So then he said, look, I'm going to say you can get married starting Wednesday of this week. So that would be what, the 18th? Tomorrow. Tomorrow, yes. Unless a federal appeals court decides otherwise. Right. And, you know, brings up an opposition. And, you know, obviously that has happened as of yesterday. A federal appeals court decided to put same sex marriage in California on hold until at least December. Yeah. Yeah. So a brief order by a three judge panel of the U.S. Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals. They are preventing an early showdown on the marriage question at the U.S. Supreme Court. Yeah. And, you know, everybody knows how I. feel and how I go on this one you know I was a yes on eight guy and voted along with the majority here in California to not allow gay marriage and for me it's a faith issue you know I mean if somebody had asked me that 15 years ago probably I would have said yeah you know anybody has the right to do whatever they want to do and you know as long as it's not bothering me
What do I care? That probably would have been my opinion on it. Now, because I've grown in my faith, you know, my rule book is the Bible. The Bible says that the act of homosexual sex is a sin. And so I can't condone something that, you know, in my view, God doesn't agree with. Right. Which is not to say, by the way. That I have something against the person. It's against the sin. And so, you know, conversely, if somebody said something else that I considered to be, you know, morally wrong for me. And that's why we vote. You know, for some people, it's not morally wrong. Yeah. And that's OK. They vote no on eight, you know. And for some people, it is morally wrong and you vote yes on eight. The thing that was really tough for me. During that whole thing was that I was cast. Well, I wasn't cast. Not me personally. But the yes on eight people were cast as bigots. Homophobes. Homophobes, bigots, that kind of deal. And, you know, for me personally, it couldn't be any farther from the truth. I'm not a bigot and I'm not a gay basher and I'm not a homophobe.
None of that. I got to vote. Yeah, man. I see where you're coming from, and I know you struggle with things like that because of your faith, and maybe you don't even struggle with things like that. Not that one. I don't struggle with that. But the way I feel about it is I'm a Christian too, but I think that 50%, maybe more of straight marriages end in divorce, which is also a sin, right? Divorce is a sin unless somebody cheated. Adultery, right? I mean, so, you know, I just kind of, I'm not looking for a loophole, you know, but the way I look at it is, hey, man, you know, 50% of these, finger quotes, regular marriages aren't working out. You know, I don't necessarily have a problem with it. Now, I'm also the immature guy that's, you know, seven years old, and I see two gay guys walking down the street. I'm like, you know, it's like I giggle. And I know you well enough to know that that's not. Like, out of any... No, it's just like, for me, I'm just... You're still seven. I'm seven. You know, I'm an idiot. But, you know, I say, I'd be a no on eight guy. I'd be no. I was no. Yeah, and, you know, to each their own. I mean, you have a vote. Different strokes, man. Different strokes, and, you know, I voted the way that I voted. But it's kind of like the... I kind of thought about it like the whole...
cross on Mount Soledad thing, you know, during the, during that thing, you know, they were trying to take the cross off of Mount Soledad. So annoying. That's, you know, very, it's a landmark. It's been there for a long time. And, and there was a, why would they try? I don't, it was a guy that was just continually filing motions that said, yeah, because it was a religious thing. He said it was a religious symbol and, uh, didn't represent everybody and blah, blah, blah. And, you know, which, this guy has every right to do. And my whole point during that was, hey man, this guy has every right to do that. The thing that was discouraging was how it would get ruled that the thing stays and then there would be a motion filed to take it down. And then it ruled that the thing stays and then there'd be a motion and it would just go back and forth and back and forth. So you don't like the fact that you voted, that it passed, and now there's even a question. Yeah. Yeah. That makes sense. I mean, listen, they're allowed to do, you know, they did what they did and we're going to do what we do and we'll go back and forth probably ad nauseum. Yeah. So obviously there's a lot of gay couples in California really upset right now because, you know, they thought it was, you know, like here it's legal, like kind of waved in front of them. Yeah. And, you know, including our mayor, Jerry Sanders' daughter, who was planning to get married this week, Lisa Sanders. And, you know, it's hard. Mm-hmm. I don't know why I giggle. I do.
I see two girls holding hands. I'm like, I'm seven years old, man. I'm an idiot. That's one of the things that is the thing about Woods is that you wear your heart on your sleeve. You tell exactly how you feel and you don't have any animosity or dislike. You're just immature. Yeah, I'm just immature. Yeah, 100%. 5701-949. Or you can text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. Let's see. Oh, no. Oh, no. Weird. You guys ready for this? Here comes racquetball for the kid. You guys are going to flip. My new hobby. You're going to flip. My new hobby. So remember last week we talked about how there was a great white shark spotted in San Onofre? Yeah. There's now been one spotted in La Jolla. Oh, man.
15 to 20 footer. Holy cow. That's a big one. Three tons of him. Yes, on Sunday the dorsal fin was spotted. And a man in a kayak actually saw it, too, swim underneath him. And he said it was much bigger than his kayak. Oh, boy. Imagine that. Imagine being on a little tippy kayak. Oh, my gosh. And you're just trying to just stay balanced. Holy cow. And this great white shark. And I guess it touched his boat, too. The fin and the tail touched his kayak. Oh, my gosh. Imagine that. That would trip me. You're going the kayak. Kayak goes in the water. Sharks in the water. I know. The kayaker saw him around 9.30 in the morning on Sunday, and then he was spotted again around 5.30, 5 o'clock p.m. on Sunday by a lifeguard. Now, man, this guy had a 12-foot kayak. The thing was bigger. Wow. That's two of woods. He's the size of a kayak. Holy cow. That's four of you.
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Now, here's what they say about great white sharks. They say that they're rogue, so they don't usually travel together. So it could be that this is just one dude. He's just passing through. Yeah, he's just a dude. He's out there. He's like, what do you want from me? No, you know what he's looking for? The seals. The seals at the beach because they're just lying around at the children's pool. Don't even get me started on that. Maybe if we got rid of them, then maybe there wouldn't be great whites swimming around. Maybe I served for the 38 in my belt. How about that? In my wetsuit. Maybe we call it bait pool. I know. It's not children's pool anymore. It's great white bait pool. Exactly. Well, if the sharks are conditioned to go there, then maybe we don't want the kids swimming there. No. They only go there because there's hundreds of fat seals lying around. Maybe we let the kids play there and the seals go away and then the sharks go away. That's a real good point. That's a really good point there. Well, they start eating babies. They don't want to eat babies. They want to eat seals. They're looking for seals, and they smell seals, and they see seals, and they know that's where they hang. I look like a seal. No, you do. You'd be an enormous seal. Yeah, so there have been lifeguards on jet skis in the water warning people to stay out. Great White was spotted.
Man, can you imagine paddling out on your board, L.O.B., or Jay, or Mikey, for that matter, and you're just paddling, paddling, and you see a 15-foot-long shadow underneath you? Well, I've seen plenty of shadows, but if I could make out the fin and the tail? What do you do? Oh, my gosh. If I knew that I was in the water with a great white. Wouldn't get but I would get out and I wouldn't get back I would freeze and then I'd wait for a wave to come and just belly it in I would put my entire body on my board no fingers hanging over the edge nothing and stay perfectly by the way I don't mean for the day I wouldn't get back in the ocean I would do the instant freak out I think I mean like the on my board paddling for the shore screaming screaming as loud as I could That would just draw attention. Don't draw attention to yourself or anything. Oh, my God. I'm carrying a gun with me. Don't stir the waters. 570-1949. Punch it in the nose. Forget it. Punch it in the nose. If you turn it up on its back, it paralyzes them. So just flip it. Really? Just flip the great white. Just grab the great white and just flip it. Yeah, just flip it. Just flip him over on his belly. I mean, there's just...
I'm just petrified. Petrified of them. Well, there it is. We got Great Whites here in San Diego. Oh, wow. Right off the shore of La Jolla. Look. I want to see one so bad. Me too. People have been going to the beach yesterday. The beaches were packed with people that wanted to see it. I bet. Nobody in the water. I know, huh? The water is so cold. I'm surprised that he's chilling. I know. I was on La Jolla Shores on Sunday, actually, now that I think about it. You in the water? No. We got in the water a little bit yesterday. It's not that cold. Oh, it's cold. Jasper got in bareback yesterday. It's cold for August. Jasper surfed. Wow. That's cool. Yeah, he just went out and played in the water. Little kids, man. Cold water does not fade. That doesn't mean anything to me. Jasper's a J-7-year-old out there surfing. 5-7-0. People go out in December. Oh, yeah. Massachusetts with just a bathing suit on. 570-194-9 is our number. If you want to call, you can call about anything. We do open phones right now, so you can call about any of these topics we're talking about, or you can call about anything that you want to talk about. That's the number, and you got the text, too. So the crash that happened out in the Mojave Desert, what was that race called? The California 200 off-road race. That was the one where the eight...
Eight people died. Yeah. Well, the Bureau of Land Management, which is they own the land where the race was held, is looking into whether the promoter, Mojave Desert Racing of El Monte, went by all the safety rules, which are in the contract. Now, apparently the. The Bureau of Land Management says that you're supposed to keep spectators 50 feet away from the racing vehicles. And you can see on the videos that people are not 50 feet away. They're right there. So that could get them, Mojave Desert Racing of El Monte, in a lot of trouble. They didn't enforce the rules. So that's kind of what's going on right now. Also, the driver, people were like, you know, is he going to get in trouble? Is he going to get in trouble for killing the eight people? It wasn't his fault. He's not going to be facing any charges. There was an accident. Yeah.
What he's facing is a lot worse than charges. You know what I mean? Yeah, you have to live. He's got to live with that. Oh, yeah. And play it over in his head a million times a day for the rest of his life, and my heart breaks for that guy. I wonder if he'll be able to race again. I don't know. I don't know that he'd ever, you know, we don't know this guy, but I know I would never get behind the wheel again. For whatever reason you didn't hear, there was a driver, Brett Sloppy, from San Marcos here in San Diego. just outside San Diego, I guess. He lost control of his Ford Ranger truck over the weekend on Saturday at an off-roading race, and it crashed into people standing in the desert and killed eight people. It was really, really sad. Three people from Encinitas. 570-1949 is our number, or you can text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. M1 Derek from San Diego, you there? Yeah, how's it going? What's going on? Hey, I got a question for you or a favor. Go ahead. Can you plan a day where you tell everybody what you're going to do and then you do it? And this is what I want.
You give L.O.B. a whole bunch of donuts and then just let her talk. Yeah. I would love it. That sounds like a great idea. Let me tell you something. That girl gets a little bit of sugar in her. And when I say a little bit, I mean a tiny little thimble amount of sugar in her. And she is flying off the walls. One frosted lake. I can't have any food today because I'm getting blood work done. But I want some donuts. Really? You can't eat today? For eight hours until I get my stupid blood work done. Oh, man. What happened to the Krispy Kreme challenge? I'm all the way in on that. Oh, man. Somebody's got to be piping hot off the grill. Who's the M1 on the phone again? Yeah, M1, Derek. Maybe you bring down some Krispy Kremes. Maybe Derek will come in this Friday with some donuts. Actually, I have a better spot than Krispy Kreme. What's that? It's in Nashville City called Plaza Donuts. I'm in. All you need to say is donuts. Can you come in on a Friday with donuts? Or now. Or now. No, I can't. Yeah, I mean, any M1 wants to bring some hot Krispy Kreme donuts, Wood says he can eat an entire box if they're hot. So I'd like to see that. I can eat a dozen if they're hot. Could you really? Yeah. They melt in your mouth and you just, like, fold them up and put them in there. I'll get a dozen done for sure. That sounds...
ridiculously good right now. Donuts normally don't sound good to me, but because I can't eat anything, I'm like, I would eat steak. Yeah, you take a pot roast. Take a pot roast right now. Pot roast, lamb chops, whatever. You take a pot roast wrapped in bacon. Yeah, cow tongue, whatever you got. Yeah. Hey, I want to thank you very much. And again, L.O.B. is like, I hate to say this, but it's almost like phone sex when she's laughing. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, wow. Pervert alert. I thought I was a perv. It's not. No, no. It's totally cute. Here's the pervert alert. All right, I deserve it. But you guys have a good one. I got to go. Thank you. I got to go. I'm going to go bury my head in the sand. If that's not sex, you're doing it wrong. Oh, boy. See what I told you? You're going to get us a fine. Oh, my God. Boyle, it wasn't me. You don't have to use your pervert alert on me. Yes, it is. You're doing some kind of... Jedi mind trick? She's doing like a trick with her voice. You're doing some kind of subconscious intercourse. And I know it.
I know you are, you dirty pervert. It wouldn't be the first time I was accused of such. You're the one that said subconscious. And put some clothes on. I have a sweater on. Sitting there naked. Oh, my God. I have a sweater on. Lauren's sitting over there completely nude. What? No, she's not. Coyle, you've never seen a naked girl if that's your idea of nude. I thought that was nude. A sweater with flip-flops? Well, mama would never let you go out of the house dressed like that. With flip-flops, showing my toes. She'd go, oh my gosh, you hussy. Don't be going outside dressed like that. Put some clothes on. Put some closed-toed shoes on. My goodness. That's funny. That is funny. So, word of the day, Fiesta. When you hear us work the word Fiesta into a sentence, caller number 9, 570-1949. We'll get a pair of tickets to go see...
I already forgot. Soft Pack. Let's go to the San Diego Wild Animal Park. Just to discover those are old winter sheets. Okay. Yeah, I was going to say, wasn't Soft Pack this past Friday? Yep, sure was. I thought so. There you go. Oh, my gosh. Mel Gibson. I forgot to talk about Mel Gibson. The thing that happened with him. Another thing? Oh, dude. This involves an accident. And if you haven't heard the huge Mel Gibson news, we'll tell you next. 7.30 this morning, we're going to do the cinnamon challenge and the saltine challenge. In case you haven't heard of those things, they're both pretty gnarly. Jay's going to do the cinnamon challenge and Woods is going to do the saltine challenge. With a cinnamon challenge, you have to eat a teaspoon or tablespoon? Spoonful. Spoonful. No, there's a certain amount. All right. That spoon should be fine. I believe it's a tablespoon. That spoon that's over there should be okay. I'll have to inspect it. That's a teaspoon, though. Just so you know. That's a what? It's a teaspoon. That is? Yep. The average spoon that you have, like a plastic spoon, any plastic spoon is a teaspoon. No, I'm positive. Yep. I'm not sure you're positive. Better be doing one and three quarter.
Teaspoons or whatever the equivalent of a tablespoon is. Yeah, that's a lot more. Well, you know what we can do? Because a heaping teaspoon is generally a tablespoon. That's a lot. Maybe everybody does one too. Maybe I'm willing to do three BBs before I do that. You're getting BBs. Yeah. All in the same spot too. Now, if you guys can't do either challenge, do you get BBs? Yeah, I'll take BB in the eye. Is that the deal? Yeah. If they can't complete the challenge? Mm-hmm. Ooh, that's good. Yeah. I thought that was a deal. That's why I wasn't going to do either one. Because if I failed, I didn't want to get BB'd. Yeah. No, I mean, I just want to see it done. You know, I hadn't even thought as far as ahead. That's what these two machismo said yesterday. No way. If I'm eating cinnamon, that's punishment enough. Oh, well, then I would have done it. Well, then do it. We still have. Well, I can't now. I've got to get blood work done. Convenient. I said yesterday I'd do the saltines. You guys be like, oh, BB. You guys fight about it later. Yeah. I want BBs anyway, so I'm fine with it. And I want to know about Mel Gibson. I know. He was in a car crash yesterday. Holy cow. No, it was actually on Sunday night. I'm sorry. Where? But he crashed his 2008 Maserati into a rocky Malibu hillside Sunday night. He was unhurt. In fact, they said he didn't even have a scratch on him. But his car is pretty messed up.
This was on Malibu Canyon Road, and I guess the person who did the investigation says it was non-intentional, and at that exact location on the road, it could have happened to anybody. Yeah, it's windy around there. Yeah, and they're saying that they do not think alcohol had anything to do with it. Sure hope not. And that he was, quote, a gentleman when dealing with a crash, because I'm sure you guys remember a few years ago when he was in a... a drinking-related crash. There was audio of him that came out, and he was a mess. Yeah, and he was cursing and anti-Semitic remarks. Oh, it was bad. All kinds of racial comments. Yeah. So it was nice to hear that he was a gentleman after this one. Yeah, it was. Hey, Woodsy is going to tell you about, in just a little bit, we're going to be doing Woods on Sports. Woodsy is going to tell you about the insane cut. that Eli Manning had last night in the Giants-Jets game. Gross. And they unveiled the brand new Meadowlands last night, the whole deal. So we'll be talking about that. Sienna, tell us about the guy on the motorcycle. Oh, this brilliant, brilliant man decided to go for a little spin on his motorcycle in Ontario on Sunday night. And what was he going to wear? Just a shirt.
Just a t-shirt. That's it. No underwear, no pants, no helmet. He's just going to go cruising. You can't do that. No. Just go cruising with his pants off. And a cop saw him, pulled him over. The guy tried to run from the cops. And then he lost control of his bike, got back up, tried to continue on. He eventually tried to get away on foot, but of course was arrested after a brief little struggle. Yeah. But he's facing charges, including dangerous driving and flight from police. Here's what that probably sounded like. Oh my gosh. Hey, Belle, why don't you pull over? What's that you say? I say, pull over. I'm actually, I'm going to Fallbrook. I don't care where you're going. You're riding your motorcycle and you don't have any clothes on. Why are you naked? I'm sorry, come again? Why are you naked? It's hot, sir. It's hot, officer. And it feels nice. Well, I bet it does, but it's against the law, chief. What's that against the law? You're riding your bicycle with no clothes on. I'm going the speed limit, sir. I'm going the speed limit. Have a good one. No, no, no. I need you to pull over right now. You know, I'm going to Fallbrook. You're welcome to join me. I don't care where you're going. There's a bike, wine, and cheese festival there. A motorcycle, wine, and cheese festival I'm going to. You don't say. Yes. Do you like brie?
Who doesn't? I'll see you there. I'll follow you. There you go. Who doesn't like free? Well, who doesn't? Sure, it sounded just like that. Bike wine and cheese festival. Yeah. The big motorcycle wine and cheese festivals that they have. They're huge in Fallbrook. They're gigantic. So Jay has a friend that called him yesterday freaking out, a neighbor. because she opened up her patio doors and a small bird flew into the house, followed by a hawk. Oh, wow. No way. And Jay had to go over there because the bird flew out right away. Yeah, I would call Jay. Who else are you going to call? I'd call Jay. But Jay, what happened? She called me up. She goes, do you have any big gloves? And I was like, well, what do you mean? He's going, I have a hawk in my house. They have the big cathedral ceilings with the beams going across. So the hawk's just up there on the beam looking around. Oh, my gosh. That's creepy, man. Scary. You've got to slit your throat with those things. I have a big net, and I went over there with my big net. But in the meantime, it flew into a window and fell to the floor, so I went over and got it. It didn't hurt it, but I got close. It did look mean. Really? It's a hawk. Yeah. How did you get it out? I rough-talked it. Yeah? Did you say to it, I'll come over there and I'll rough-talk you? I said.
Yeah, I'll rough talk you. I'll come out here and rough talk him and run him off. That's all it took. Every time. That would be so scary with his sharp beaks and talons. So he was laying on the ground, you picked him up and... No, I got over by him. As soon as I got near him, he freaked. And I kind of got him where, sent him towards the door. That's what he said to me. That would be terrifying. Was it a beautiful animal? It was beautiful. It was beautiful. Hey, you have beautiful hair. Look how gorgeous it is. He has feathers. You know that. That's right. How's the back, L.O.B.? Back is hurting. Did you go to the chiropractor yesterday? Yeah. And it was like, oh, man, that is great. After I leave and then I wake up this morning in more pain than the morning before. Yeah. I don't know about this whole thing. Seems like a bunch of voodoo medicine to me. It sure does work when you get it done, though. Yeah. I'll tell you, when I get cracked, man. I walk out of there, and I'm like, oh, I feel like a million dollars. It's a great 20 minutes of your life. It does work immediately, though. I mean, sometimes it sticks, you know? Funny. My guy sticks every time. Yeah? But sometimes it goes back, you know? It just depends. It's not working for me. You've got to have the right guy. Speaking of birds, Sienna is nesting so much in her house. I am. Because she's going to have her baby. Uh-huh.
She's now had the carpets done, the rugs done, the couch is cleaned. Yeah, perfect. She took the dog to the groomer. I did. Yeah. Everything is clean. Take care of business, man. I know. I'm surprised everything's not in a Ziploc. I know. If I could do it, I would. Yeah, no, I had the carpets done and the couch. I've never had my couch clean before, but it's great. It's fantastic. So I had a fan blowing on it. I couldn't sit on the couch all last night. I was going to ask you because, you know when you take your car in to get it detailed or whatever, which I haven't done since 88. Right. When you get back in your car, you're like, it smells like wet dog, and it smells like the wet mask. Did your house stink? No, it didn't stink. It smelled wet, though. Wet, yeah. I don't like that smell. Yeah, but it will dry, and it will be great. He said that, because we got a puppy, man, and some of those rugs were destroyed by our dog. It was so nice to be cleaned. We have five. Five. Did it smell dank?
When you first walk in, I love it. When I first walked in, I was like, ooh. But then I opened up all the windows and got some air flow in there, and it was all okay. What's your least favorite word, Woods? Probably moist. Yes, I was going to say, if not dank, moist. Moist. It's a bad one. How about you, L.O.B.? Panties. Panties? Maybe combine those two. It's a word that you hear that you're like, hey. I have a friend that used to always say, when referring to a color, she would say, Periwinkle. I was like, get out of here. And then she would say, she had these really beautiful curly tendrils. And tendrils. I love the word tendrils. Ew, I don't like it. Is that your least favorite word? I think tendrils is gross. How about you? I don't want to ask you. Mine's good. Mine was red-eye. My dad, every time we were supposed to go somewhere, are you red-eye? And I was like, I will beat you. That's a Texas thing. Is that supposed to be like red-ey? It made me, I hated that word. It's a Texas thing, dude. Are you red-eye? No, another word I hate.
Puss. Puss is nasty. Isn't that an awful word? Mucus is a bad word, too. Mucus is bad. I like mucus. Save that clip. Yeah, it was clean. Woodsy, I want to know all about Eli Manning, the whole bit. I'm going to give you what you want. Woods on Sports brought to you by our friends at Clearview Eye and Laser Medical Center. Man, last night was awesome watching Monday Night Football. They left the starters in for a while. Mark Sanchez throws a pick on his first pass attempt of the year. You can feel the air just kind of from the Jets because the Jets have been running a lot of them out. They've guaranteed a Super Bowl win already. They haven't played a game. But, hey, and you've got to like that confidence, man. They were in the AFC championship game last year. So, you know, it was pretty cool to watch that game. But I'll tell you what, man. Eli Manning last night got lit up. It was gnarly. He had single coverage on the right.
So he's going to call an audible. Well, I guess his running back didn't hear him. And he came in for the handoff, bumped into Eli. Dude came around the corner, hit Eli, knocked his helmet off. Then his face went into the other defender's face mask who was coming towards him. He's on one knee and blood is pouring out and he's holding his hand up like, hey, I need some help. And he's running to the sidelines and blood is just pouring out. Like a faucet. When you're a guy and you have an injury like that, and he sees pictures now today, do you feel like a B.A.? Oh, yeah. You feel like you're... At the time, he looked scared. He looked... I mean, he didn't look... He wasn't like... You see quarterbacks get up and they got blood coming out of their lip or their nose and they're like, give me the ball. He was like, I need some help. Well, the head bleeds so much. So it was like gushing. Like they moved away the hand to cover it. Pores. It was dripping and pouring. It was dripping. Jamie was like, oh, look. She goes, bleh. That's why I don't like when starters are in preseason. Because if you're a Giants fan and you see that, your heart just sinks. Really? We're going to do this? As the traitors were walking him into the locker room, Tom Coughlin was probably going, oh, this preseason stuff is great. I love having to get my guys in there. But, man, it was a good game. I mean, the Giants came out and then whipped them 31-16.
LT played last night for the Jets. Had 17 yards on eight carries. He did have a 14-yard touchdown run where he exploded into the end zone. Called it back on a penalty. I wouldn't even watch last night because I didn't want to see LT. I wanted to really bad, but I was 45 minutes late. I thought the game started at 6. It started at 5. And I'll tell you what, man. That new stadium is a sight to behold. It's beautiful. You're still maintaining that that is... Both of their stadiums. And it has been for the last 26 years. Okay. Then who gets the home field advantage last night? Last night was the Jets. And I don't know how they did it, but it was the Jets' home field. I guess maybe they flipped a coin for all I know. But it was really cool. Mark Sanchez is talking about his new digs. Cut one. Amazing. This place, the fans are right on you in that little section right there. It's pretty cool. I mean, just the post-game press conference. This is pretty fun. It was great to see the whole stadium lit up in green, and we'll be excited to play here every home game. It's going to be very nice. They share it. It's weird. It's weird. What do they do with it? They repaint the end zones every other week? Yeah. It's just like they do, you know, Notre Dame plays in the Meadowlands when they play Navy. Yeah, they do. And they all just.
Switch it all out. They can turn a hockey rank into a basketball rank in four hours and vice versa. I don't know. From New Jersey, I never knew. I thought Shea, but that's the Mets. That's the Mets. Yes, correct. Also, the Padres won again last night. I'll tell you what, man. More and more, Miguel Tejada is looking like a great move. The guy went four for five last night. Had two RBIs. He looks so comfortable in that Padres uniform. He looks comfortable in the field. He's batting. Just ridiculous since he got here. He started slow, but, man, he is hitting everything now. Here's manager Bud Black on his new star cut, too. Hits all pitches and hits good pitching. Again, we've seen him work the left field line. We've seen him hit the ball in the left field gap. We've seen him draw the ball to right center. We've seen him single to right. I heard they're the first team in Major League Baseball at this point in the season to beat a 75 wins. Oh, yeah. I mean, that's... The San Diego Padres. Yeah, they don't get enough love from the rest of the country. They really don't, man. Traditionally, the East Coast bias. East Coast is more popular. Baseball is more popular on the East Coast. But Padres are a force to be reckoned with. They beat the Cubs last night 9-5. Real sweetly. Yeah, real sweetly. Also, Sean Merriman was back.
At practice yesterday in full pads, ready to rock. They asked him, Sean, what do you need to work on? Cut three. Well, just feeling good. You know, the first time I've been out in full pads, the first day being back in practice is tough. But these guys have been out here working for weeks. So I got a lot of work to do. Yeah, and he looks. He looks in shape. Oh, yeah. He looks good. All he's been doing is working out. He looks good. Saw him on Entourage a couple weeks ago. He looked pretty good on there, too. Dude is in shape. And we talked a little bit last week. I told you guys a story about the closer for the Mets. Frankie Rodriguez, also known as K-Rod, comes out of the locker room. His father-in-law, or his girlfriend's father, the mother of his children, right? The grandfather to his kids, standing there. They have an exchange, and Frankie Rodriguez ends up beating the crap out of this guy. Well, it came out yesterday. He has torn ligaments in his thumb, and he is out for the year. This happened because of the fight. Because of the fight. From punching? From punching. His father-in-law. Basically, the Mets have said they're thinking about maybe now voiding his contract and saying, hey, there's a clause that says if you hurt yourself in activities off the field, we can void your contract. That will cost the guy millions and millions of dollars.
I was talking to Bark Malvin last night. I said, hey, this is a guy that you just cut ties with. You have to. And just you're a train wreck. Go pitch in Milwaukee. You know what I mean? Because obviously he can't handle New York and everything that comes along with that. But he's out for the year, so he's done. He's got to probably fix up a thumb. I mean, it's only your drawn hand. Oh, man, it's terrible. So that is Woods on Sports. The panel is where we talk about what is happening in the world. What are the topics out there that are hot? And we will go around to Woods and Lauren and me. How do you like that? I figured it out. Well done. And we'll get 20 seconds of opinion from each of us. The first thing up is the JetBlue flight attendant, who is now... Stephen Slater. Stephen Slater. Steve Slater. What's the latest? Well, he's just gotten himself a big-time public relations guy to represent him. Of course. This guy named Howard Bragman. And he says that apparently SS, Stephen Slater, has been getting tons of reality TV show offers. His publicist's name is Bragman. Bragman. He says there are probably 25 reality shows offers on the tables at this point right now, the table. For what?
I wonder, like for what? Well, because he's a household name right now. He's a big deal right now. I guess you've got to strike while they aren't hot, man. Let's see, is this guy, you know, like as interesting to watch as he showed us? He's at 14 minutes, 25 seconds on his 15 minutes of fame. Yeah, he's running out. Would you have any interest in watching that? Mike, I don't watch reality shows, period. Much less one about a flight attendant that slid down a slide with two beers in his hand. I mean, I could care less. You're out. Yeah. I like the dude. You were all in on him last week. No, I like the guy, but I'm not going to watch the guy on TV. He had his moment. He's funny. He's great. Working class hero. Lauren, what do you think about these non-celebrity reality shows and all this stuff? I can't stand them. They are compromising the integrity of TV shows, of movies, of... Everything that we watch, and I feel like whenever I watch them, I'm a little bit dumber. Unless it's some specific skill or something like that. If I'm just watching somebody's life, get it. Yeah, I'm with you. Some are good. I'm going to find this stat for you. When I heard the stat, I was like, is that for real? They asked a bunch of high school students what would be the coolest thing that could happen to them.
And what high school students in America said was to have their own reality show. Oh, man. Sad. It is sad. It is sad. I mean, it's ridiculous. That's what people, you know, kids, they want a reality show. Stupid. But they think it's like them just getting to have fun and live their life and there's cameras following them. So it's like you get paid a lot of money and you don't really have a job. Yeah, but you get fed alcohol. You get fed lines. You get... Put in compromising situations. And I think the bigger umbrella of all of it is that you become famous. You become famous. At what price? At total exploitation. Yeah, but that's what they want. They want it. They want it. They want to be famous. The best fast food burger has been voted on and decided. Is that correct? Yes. Who voted? Who says it? How do you pronounce that? Zagat. It's the 2010 Zagat Fast Food Survey. Yeah. I feel weird saying that word. Bob Zagat. I know. And you want to know who the winner is? Who? Best burger. Who? Five guys. I told you to. They're not here in California. They're everywhere. They're here? They have one on the military base here.
Really? Yeah. There's 600 Five Guys stores all around the country, and that was one of the things that penalized In-N-Out is there's only 249, and they're mostly on the West Coast. I want somebody from the military, because you're right. They have one at the Naval Station, and it's ungodly good. Describe it. You've never had Five Guys? No. I haven't either. I haven't either. You don't eat burgers. Yeah, but I've had other stuff, though. You should write that down. Yeah. Five Guys. I get it. You've never had Five Guys. No, I haven't. Me neither. Five... Pervert alert. Five Guys is not, you know, here in California, but I guess they have them on the naval base here. I think there's some. I mean, I think there's some throughout the country. I mean, but here in San Diego? And throughout the state, yeah. In the county? They're in a lot of airports. I've seen them in a lot of airports. Describe it, Woods. Dude. When it starts with dude, you know it's good. It feels like you've got to add a barbecue. It's so fresh. It's fresh, and the cheese is, like, melted on there perfectly. The bun is perfect. The pickles are thick and juicy. Stop. It's moist and delicious. Mikey, when it opened in Dallas, Bark Mountain and I went there for lunch, and I feasted on that thing. I got a junior because the juniors are big, and I was like,
Do I get another one? Do I get another one? I didn't get another one, but I could have. So they're large. Yeah. Yeah, they're good. Well, they're the best burger, and they actually are the second place best fries, too, right behind McDonald's. McDonald's. Nobody beats a McDonald's fry. Nobody beats a McDonald's fry. Zero percent. Good. I know. Woodsy, do you agree, or is there a better burger? No, I agree, man. You know, it's... If it's fast food, then yeah. I mean, I still think Hodad's has the best burger I've ever eaten, but it's not fast food. In fact, you may wait two and a half hours to get a burger. But for a fast food burger, done. I mean, I said it when we first started in the air. If you guys all love In-N-Out here, I said Five Guys kills it. L-O-B. Well, the next survey they have needs to be on the best turkey burger outfit. Because I can't contribute to these. I haven't had a burger in like... 20 years. Yeah. I don't know. I haven't had a regular burger, but Fat Burger has the best turkey burger I've ever had. Really? That's my two cents. I've never had one. Never eaten one. You've got to be around my wife more. Well, when she still ate meat. She loved turkey burgers. Well, I've never had Five Guys, but Brian is on the line. M1 Brian, are you there? Yeah, I'm here. Brian, where is their Five Guys location? One in Point Loma. It's right by...
a new Corvette diner. Really? Ooh. Okay. Corvette diner. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The new Corvette diner is over by Liberty Station. Yeah. Right on. I want to try it. If anybody can get one, bring it down here. Thank you. Thank you, Brian. Appreciate it. Yeah, I want to try that. Don't forget, word of the day. Maybe we go there for lunch one day. Yeah. All the way in. Word of the day is Fiesta. When you hear that worked into a sentence, caller 9 at 570-1949 gets wild animal park tickets. So yesterday, this is some pretty crazy audio. Yesterday, Matt Lauer interviewed a woman who has a rare form of amnesia where she can't remember anything since 1994. And we have audio. Maybe she talks about color me bad. I don't know. So here's the deal. At 7.30 this morning, we're going to be doing the cinnamon and saltine challenge. Yummy. I've been practicing. Have you? No, I've just been feasting on saltines. You broke into the saltines? Okay, so... So good. The cinnamon challenge Jay's going to do, the saltine challenge Woods is going to do, the cinnamon challenge is you have to take a tablespoon of cinnamon and you've got to eat it. And the...
The saltine challenge is you have to eat a certain number in a certain amount of time? No, I have to eat four in my mouth and try to whistle. Oh, my God. And maybe we upped the ante, Jay. Maybe you do saltines and cinnamon at the same time. Oh, gosh. Why do I have to do more? I know. Why don't you shoot the crackers out of your hand while you're trying to eat them? Because it's fun. Yeah, so Woods said to me yesterday, which one are you doing? I said, neither. He said, then you take a BB. And I said, I take... And he said, you take three. And I said, I don't care. I'm not doing cinnamon or saltines. I'm going to pop you real deep. You really want to take three, Mike? Yeah, I'll do three. Imagine cinnamon sitting in your mouth. Not just a little bit, but a spoonful. It's like a desert in there. A spicy desert. We should cut a little paper circle out and put it right on Mikey's butt and try to see who can get the closest. Yeah, you should. All the way up. We'll make a little target. A little target? Yeah. Oh, my gosh. I'm going to get on it. I'm going to get on it right now. So Matt Lauer interviewed a girl yesterday that has a condition.
where she can't remember anything. It's a rare form of amnesia where she can't remember anything since 1994. Wow. Take a listen to all of you. Hi, Michelle. How are you doing? I'm fine. Thank you. I was shaking my head when I started to read the research on this last night because it's hard for us to get our arms around this. How soon after today, after sitting here with me this morning, will you forget that you were ever here? Because this is a special occasion, I don't think I'm going to forget this one. I forget when it was. Because to me, this is so unique and amazing to me. So this will register. That's pretty cool, by the way. Yeah. If it's a big deal, it's bizarre. Does anybody think it's a bit? Yes. You do? Okay, so Lauren, you think it's a bit. Woods? I would if she didn't talk in a British accent. I believe her. I do too because of the British accent. She's thought the same thing. If she was from Arkansas or something, I'd be like, that's a bit. Because she's British, I believe her. Perhaps in a slightly different portion of your brain. Anything that amazes me will stay there.
You arrived in New York yesterday, I think it was. We have some photographs of you last night in and about town that were taken. When you look at these photos, what do you think? I'm sorry, you are? Do you remember them? Not really. No, not really. So when you see this that just happened last night, you draw a blank. Yes. Whoa! That's wild. Does she dress like she's in the night? Yeah. I want to know how quickly she forgets things. If he asks a question, if he asks her the same question a minute later, is she going to remember the first time? Well, I saw a little bit about her, and part of the deal is that it's very much like memento, and that she's got to write things down. Oh, my gosh. Did she get hit in the head? Do we know? See, that's something you would not want to fake. That'd be exhausting to try to keep up if you had to fake it. You know, I know that I heard what it was. that caused this condition, but I can't remember what it was. How ironic. Maybe you suffer from the same affliction. Maybe you're an amnesiac. Who are you? So mean. Michelle, doctors say to you what? Is there any improvement that you might experience, or do they say this is what you should learn to live with? Honestly, you know, Matt, anything you ask her, she's going to have to remember.
The answer to that. Right. So what am I supposed to remember what doctors have said to me? Yeah, that's a great point. Right? See if she can pull this one off. I wonder if it is in the Alzheimer's world, if part of the brain, because my mom's got Alzheimer's. Sometimes she'll do that within a conversation. She'll tell me something and she'll forget and she'll tell you again. I wonder if she has to write down notes and in like the movie 50 First Dates, every morning she's got to wake up and be like, I'm 37. This is what I do. I was in this accident. They do. She does. In fact, they compared it to 50 First Dates. When they were talking about her, they compare it to 50 First Dates. So it's just like that. The rest of your life. This is it. It won't get any better. You know, we're all told that we can do little tricks. We can do little things to improve our memory. That won't even work with you, even a small amount. I try and do, to remember people's name, I try and do word association. So she would call me, you know, hey, Chubbs, how are you? And I would say, well, that's not my name. I was trying to remember, I need to associate something. Hello, short stuff. Hey, little bubs, where are we going for lunch today? Hello, panda bear. No, no, no, my name is Mike. Half pint. What's on the agenda?
I would think one of the hardest things is, like, she probably thinks she's, you know, 20 years old, however old she is, you know, or was when this happened. And then looking in the mirror every day and you're a lot older, you're like, whoa, what happened? And how does she know that she does little word associations? How does she remember that? Because I remembered it. I associated it. I just did it. I did it just now. It was an event that amazed me, so I thought. I'll remember this one. I've got it. For the cameras. I've got it. This blonde one here looks like Lauren Bacall. Hello, Lauren. Mine is The Gap. Hello, Will Endowed. How are you? Will Endowed. Hello, Jugs. Hello. I don't remember the number itself, but imagine I was turning it into a key, into a telephone. Right. And I remember the pattern. And that helps you remember. And that helps me remember. I do that. I do that with phone numbers. I remember the pattern. That's how I remember phone numbers. When you look at the phone, you can do it? Yeah. You don't do that? I can do that. That's how I remember phone numbers. I go to my contact list on my cell phone. I hit send. Really? Yeah, I don't know numbers. Oh, if I look at a dial and I can see the numbers, it's so much easier to remember the number. Yeah, I mean, I do that. I do go to the address book and hit their number, but I also know their number, and the way that I know their number is by memorizing the pattern that it makes on the keypad. I know Jamie's.
And Baumann's and like two other people's. That's it. I know my parents and my sister. Yeah, that's all. Yeah, most of us in today's world don't know phone numbers. That's a shame. You ask what your brother's phone number is. I don't know. I just go to his thing in my address book. That's sad. You know? I remember up to six numbers now. Just by the pattern that I press. And the numbers I put in. Not that it's going to impact your life in any way. Do you remember my name? No, sorry. Oh. Wait a minute. I thought you said that if it was a big event, that you would remember it. Right, and wouldn't she, if she forgot his name, wouldn't she all of a sudden be like, oh my gosh, where am I? Listen, I'll remember the bright lights in the television. I'll remember being on the telly, but I won't. I'll remember the residual paychecks I get from this appearance. Right. But I won't remember why I was here. And I'll remember that there was an handsome gentleman that was interviewing me, but I can't remember your name. How could you expect me to remember your name? And why would I want to remember your name? I'll remember that I wanted this iPad, but I won't remember if I paid for it or not. I forget to pay for things quite often. It's a good bit. I've got a Jaguar XK4.
That's a good book. Oh, it's weird. How would she not remember his name and then not freak out when she realizes, why am I in front of a camera right now? Yeah, who's this guy? I remember being here, but I don't remember your name. That's weird. That's a small detail. It's very weird. The lights, the bright cameras, New York City, that's a big detail. I remember the big things. I don't remember the smaller things. What's important? It's not important. You have to have someone take care of you constantly. For instance, I remember last night. having a very large Italian meal. I can't remember the name of it. Why would I want to know the name of the restaurant? But I know it was at a man's house. He was involved in the mafia. The mafia. Sorry, no. And I'm not sure you ever knew my name, by the way. But it's just bizarre. We could laugh over that. I forget everything. It's just Olaf at my condition. I remember it now. That is so crazy. That's nuts. 570-1949 is our number or 949mikey at gmail.com if you want to text us. Jay from Claremont is on the line. Hi, Jay. Hey, how you doing, Mikey? Good, dude. What's up? I got a question. I moved here about a month ago from St. Louis.
You know, when I got here, I didn't really know anybody. And so, you know, I'm always up to meeting people. And a couple of days ago, actually, I run into somebody I know who's out here as well. And we start talking and, oh, man, it's great. She's amazing, beautiful. She gives me her number. She said, yeah, I know you're new here. I know what it's like to be new and don't know anybody. He's a good friend of mine. He's not like my best friend, but he's a really good friend of mine. So I'm wondering, is it wrong to hook up with her? Wait, bro code, bro code. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. So you move here and you find out like coincidentally that this is somebody that you used to date your friend or you like recognized her and were like. Oh, no, no, no. I know her. You know her. We used to date my friend. We just happened to run into each other. Got it, got it, got it. How serious were they? Jackpot.
Yeah. They were pretty serious. I mean, they went out for over a year. They went out almost two years. Jackpot Woods? I'm just kidding. Oh, my gosh. You scared me so bad. Well, it's, hey, you know what it is. It's a nice little way into her and all her friends. Yeah. Yeah. You get in there and sniff around what she's got on her table. So you think it's wrong to date her? Yes. Yeah. Yes. Yeah, it's wrong because it's your boy. Yeah. Yeah, but, like, they broke up. Would you tell him? You know what else? Would you tell him? Yeah, then it's wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just answered it. Yeah, you just answered it. Well, can he ever date her? No. Is it just like a statute of... No, there's no. No, there's no statute of limitations. Never. What if he dies? If he dies, then yes. If he dies, then yes. That's it. God forbid. God forbid. God forbid. I changed my mind. I changed my mind. I changed my mind. No, he can't. If he dies and he's... I don't think it's a big deal. Jay, I don't think it's a big deal. I had one of my best buddies dated an ex-girlfriend of mine. Didn't bother me.
We actually compared little notes. Oh, compared notes. You compared notes? Gross. Creepers. Creepers. Creepers. And here's the catch, too. He actually did the same thing before he met her. Really? Yeah, he dated... an ex-girlfriend of one of our other friends. Oh. He might be in the clear then. Maybe he understands. No. Maybe you run it past him first. Yeah. If you're really interested in it and you feel that there's a vibe going on and most importantly you think you can close the deal, then I think you should give him a call. Is there really a vibe or do you just find it attractive? Wait, wait, wait. We got to back up. His morality can't be based on his other guy's morality. No, but his morality can be based on the fact that if he asks his buddy and his buddy's like, dude, I could care less. Have a ball. Yeah. Okay, then ask. I wouldn't write it past him. I'd just tell him. Oh, creeper. Yeah, I'd ask him. I mean, if you want the friendship. Yeah, and you're like, hey, this is weird, man. I just moved here, and you'll never believe who I ran into. I ran into Lauren, and dude, I was thinking about asking on a date. Would you be weird about that? Sienna, even though you're married, would you be upset if you found out that one of your girl...
friends was dating an ex of yours and didn't say a word to you about it? Honestly, like now, where I am now, I wouldn't care. Because I've moved on and I could care less. You're having a baby. Go ahead and have fun with that guy. He's a jabroni. See, I don't know. He's a friend, but it's not like you're going to end up dating people who've never had boyfriends or girlfriends. That's true. And I know he's a friend of mine. He's a current friend. But still. Right, he's a current friend. He's not like my... Best friend, but we talk pretty regularly. Do you honestly think that the feelings are really, really strong with this girl, or are you just happy that you recognize someone and you have a familiar face to see here? I've got to be honest, I've always been attracted to her. Oh, wow. See, my college boyfriend... Don't tell your friend that. No, I'm not going to tell him that. Like five years ago? Yeah. And I know...
That even though five years ago, I don't even talk to him anymore. I don't care what he does, who he's dating. He can be married with kids for all I know or care. But his friends, some of his friends still live out here. And they know, like, no. You're off limits. Yeah. Yeah. And I know that. I mean, I wouldn't go tinkering around in there just because it's weird. Is she giving you the vibe, Jay? That's what I mean. I was really, here's the deal, I was really trying to just keep it platonic. I was really trying to just talk, hey, how's it going? Where are you? Oh, great, it's a place I can go. We just had this, I think it was a connection, but what I'm worried about is, is it something in my mind? I think it was there. I do. She's worth it if you guys have a connection. Go get a drink with her. But you'd have to run it by the guy first. It isn't worth it. It is if he runs it by him. Yeah, if you run it by him. He may, he seriously may not care. He may not care. You know what, though? And it's on him if he does, but he's probably going to do the, I don't care, you know, hey, I don't care. Well, if he does that, then he's an idiot. It's on him. And it's also, though, I mean, he lives here. This other guy lives in where? St. Louis, right? He's in St. Louis. Well, it's not like they're, you know, right in front of his face all the time with the relationship. Do they talk still?
Yeah, they still talk. Let me tell you this, dude. I will tell you this. If you are picking up the wrong vibe and you go for it, she's going to run to him and go, oh, and guess who tried to put the moves on me? Jay, that creep. I'm risking losing this guy's friendship no matter what happens. That's the other thing. Not if you ask him. If I ask him, I was thinking about this. If it were me, and somebody said, hey, man, I want to date one of your ex-girlfriends, I don't know if I'd be cool with that or not. Even him asking is an insult. Right, exactly. So, grow up. Not you, the other guy. I'd give you the play-by-play handbook. Here's what you need to do to get her to go out with you. Wow. Here's what's weird about that. Like, you've got to assume that you loved the girl, don't you? Yeah. So how do you compare notes, Jay? I mean, didn't you love her at one time? I did, but we moved on from each other. I mean, it's not like we were weird.
you know, had our time together. We had, you know, had our connection and I, I didn't mind her being happy. It's like, Oh really? I don't want you to be happy forever. See, two of the people that were, but I'm totally on Jay, our producer side. Like, you know, I just, if I think about my exes, it's like, man, I'm, I'm done with that. Yeah. It's one thing if like they were, you had to start hanging out with your ex all the time again. Cause your friend was bringing him around. Yeah. I wouldn't want, that would be weird. Yeah. But if. If I'm not going to see it and I don't need to be around it, have a ball. See, I just figured it out. For me, it isn't about jealousy. It's not like, oh, I'm jealous that you're going to be hooking up with so-and-so. It's about like, isn't there kind of a big ocean out there? Do you really want my sloppy seconds? I don't know. I don't know if the ocean is that big. At least the ocean that I was swimming in was a small town. It was a small town of Conroe. But that's different when you're in a small town like that. They're like crossed states 2,000 miles away. Out of all the girls in San Diego, you've got to go for that one, huh? If I think back about it, all my friends that got hooked up with ex-girlfriends of mine. It's just like, huh, really?
Some are married with kids, and it was like the perfect connection. And I guess that's a small town thing. And how old were you then? Because in high school that happened all the time. And if you're out here in San Diego, I mean, if you're back there in St. Louis and you're going, hmm, it's 8 o'clock, Saturday night. I guess I know what Jay's up to. Oh, get a life. I wouldn't think that you would do that. I think that you would just. You wouldn't think about them together. You would just question how good your friendship was. Yeah. You know what I mean? Let's see. Hang on a second. M1 Gonzo, are you there? I'm right here. What's your question for Jay? How long ago did they break up? How long ago did you guys break up? Did they break up, Jay? Oh, it's been about a year right now. About a year. They broke up about a year. Yeah. It's fresh. Over a year. Over a year, Ed. A year and three months. 12 days. Yeah. Who's counting? Four hours. I've been counting down. I wouldn't do it, man. It's not worth it. Yeah, it ain't worth it. It ain't worth it, man. Yeah, but you have too many questions, too many doubts already. Forbidden fruit tastes real good. It tastes the best. That creeped me out right there when you said it. See, I don't know. Okay, here's the thing. I'm trying to put myself. I'm trying to reverse it.
Do guys, like, would you call your dude up and tell him about, like, problems you're having with your girl? Sure. So the thing that would be weird for me, like, I'm thinking about my ex, like, my college ex, and I wouldn't care, like, at all who he's doing what with. But if she called me up and then was like, yeah, it's just really weird, like. He seems distant. Or, like, if she started telling me about their problems, I'd be like, ew, ew, weird, weird, weird. That's weird. What's her name? Jay, can you say her name? Yeah, her name's Laura. What does Laura look like? Laura. She's beautiful. You know what she looks like? She looks like that girl in Twilight. Kristen Stewart. Yeah, dirty little goth. She's probably a better actress, too. Is she a, quote, dirty little goth chick? No, she's not goth at all. Like, if you strip all that goth down, she's got this natural beauty about her. So how weird would it be if you're talking to your boy and you're like, yeah, dude, I don't know what's up with Laura. She's just, you know, she's freaking out on me. That's where it gets weird. That's the price you pay, though. You can't talk to that friend about that at all. So then, yeah, it puts a wedge in the friendship because you're like, I don't want to know.
Go for it. I'm thinking about telling them this. I'm thinking about saying, now, you cared about her, and this might be a horrible move. You cared about her. Wouldn't you rather see her dating? No. No, that's not that bad. Make real sweetly I'm making her happy real sweetly. 100%. Thanks, Jay. Appreciate it. Tastes real good, Jay. Tastes real good. Pull that apple down and feast, pal. That's so gross. That is the grossest thing. I think that Jay and Laura, I think they're hooking up like this weekend. I think it's going to happen. If they haven't already. I know. They totally already have. I'm so skeeved. When we come back, I'm going to play.
When we come back, I'm going to play a kid asking the Jonas Brothers on some TV show, quote, how come you don't get thrown in jail like Lindsay Lohan? Oh, wow. Nice question. And how they respond. Wow. Next. Yeah, yeah, yeah, dog. We are just moments away from the cinnamon and saltine challenge. And I have to take three BBs to the behind. Because you're wimping out. Yeah, because I won't do that. Oh, boy. I don't know if getting shot is being a wimp. Well, Jay has fashioned a little bullseye for my butt. It's ridiculous. It's so funny. I can't believe you're allowing this to happen, Michael. We're going to scotch tape that to my bottom. Would you like to take a shot at me? No, I can't do it. Can I?
Of course. I haven't got to do anything. You don't want to? I can't pull the trigger and shoot somebody. Really? Heck no. It's a shot of love. It's a shot of love. No way. I can't do it. I can't inflict pain upon another. That's so sweet. What's going on in news, Sienna? Well, just to give you an update on the flood in Pakistan, one-fifth of Pakistan is still underwater after three weeks of flooding. As many as six million people have been affected and have not yet received any relief. About one in ten Pakistanis, 20 million people altogether, have been affected by this flood. I mean, it's a huge deal over there. Also, on a lighter note, here in San Diego, the San Diego Unified students have made some serious gains on standardized tests for the fourth straight year in a row. You know you have to do those standardized tests. Did you have to do those? Yes. I'm going to pretend.
that I know what that is. Uh-oh. It's when you have to, like, sit down for a week in your class and do the Scantron. Ours are called TASP. Right. And they rate how well each district is doing, each school is doing. Is that the number two pencil bit? Yeah, exactly. But that's great news considering the budget cuts, you know, that students are still doing well, teachers are still teaching and doing their jobs, and we're improving. So that's awesome. Good stuff. Good stuff. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, we talked a little bit yesterday about Bryce Harper. Would he get signed by his team, the Washington Nationals? He did. He did. With minutes to spare. Signed a five-year deal, signing bonus of $6.25 million. Kid's 17 years old. Oh, my God. He just got a check for $6.25 million. Poor kid. You know, he left high school early to go play junior college ball. When he got to junior college, he batted 443, hit 31 homers, and drove in 98 runs. He's a kid. He's filthy. He's 17. Yeah, he's only got 20 years of baseball left. His contract, by the time this contract's up, he's going to be 22. $25 million a year deal. No question. If he plays up to potential. Oh, wow. I have a hard time getting a girlfriend. Yeah, exactly. Also, Brian Westbrook has a new team. No. The 49ers. Yeah, man. Great move for them. He's going to back up Frank Gore. $1.25 million deal for one year plus incentives. So it's a really good move. Yeah. I mean, I grew up a Niner fan. And so as a Niner fan, I'm like.
Yeah. We'll take it. Back up for Frank Gore is Brian Westbrook. That's awesome. Can I ask you dudes a quick question? Yes. I love Brian Westbrook. He's like a Philly boy through and through. I have a Westbrook jersey. It's an Eagles jersey. I also like the 49ers. If I went to a 49ers game, even though it was an Eagles jersey, could I wear a Westbrook jersey? No, the rule is, and I just read this actually because there was some stuff about it on Facebook. The rule is, like, don't wear your LT jersey too. The Chargers game, you know what I mean? Yeah, so get a new player get a you know get a Westbrook Niners Jersey if you like the Niners and Westbrook get one of those Would it be in poor form to go to a Jets game in the Meadowlands wearing a Chargers LT jersey? So many people are gonna wear them though because that's what everyone wore Yep, but it's not a good bit apparently. I would be mad if I saw it. Yeah, man We have the saltine and cinnamon challenge coming up in just a moment But first, let's hear on Fox and Friends what happens when a kid asks the Jonas Brothers why they don't get thrown in jail like Lindsay Lohan. Let's go over to some kids who've assembled here in our studio, and let's get some questions for the Jonas Brothers. Zach, are you going to kick it off? Yeah.
My question is, how come you guys don't get thrown in jail like Lindsay Lohan and a bunch of other big stars? That's the best questions of the day for the kids. That's incredible. Why don't we get thrown in jail? I actually think it's a very... relevant and good question. We're good dudes. Yeah, that's so funny. That's a great question. That's a great question. Very good question, Zach. You stumped him. How about everybody talk at once? That's enough. Good answer. Yeah, they're not in jail like Lindsay Lohan because they haven't gotten arrested. I'm sorry. I don't get why that's a good question. It's a good question because they haven't gotten in jail. They're popular. And that's kind of the MO of a lot of big pop stars is to get in trouble. How come you guys aren't in jail? You know, I'm glad you asked that. The reason that we're not is because we mind our P's and Q's. We don't get in trouble. Yeah, okay. Asked and answered. I like it. Good examples. Yeah. Would you be smart enough to just figure that out?
You don't go to jail if you don't commit crimes? No, I think the kid legitimately wanted to know, like, hey, in the world that I live in, if you're cool, like, you kind of do some bad stuff. How come you're not? What's the deal? I like it. Fair question. I like it. You guys ready for this? Yeah. Cinnamon and saltine challenge. All right. So gross. Oh, this is foul. Jay? Oh, God. I think this mic works. Yep. Yep. Mic works. Wait, wait, wait. I'll scoop it out. I don't think he will. I never said the proposal that this would be the way it would. You're going to give yourself like a little baby. No. Oh, my gosh. Jay's a monster. Jay's a man, dude. On the video camera, do we have this? You can go online, MikeyShow.com and watch the slides. Hang on a minute. I don't think you can because you can't see it. Hang on a second. First of all, Jay, did you bring that from home? No, no. I had Adam actually. You're spilling. You're spilling. I can't look. Adam went and picked it up for us. Promotions. Because it says Kroger on it. And Kroger is a grocery store that's like from back east. We don't have any Kroger's here. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know how Adam did that. But it's one of those big old honking mamas. From Costco. Maybe Costco. It's a big, you know, tall plastic cinnamon deal. Yeah. And Jay just got in there.
And that's more than a heaping teaspoon. That's like two tablespoons. It's like the size of an egg he's about to put in his mouth. I would say that that's at least two tablespoons. It's a tablespoon and a half. It's a tablespoon and a half. Jay, you don't even need that much. It's a tablespoon and a half. That's probably a tablespoon and a half. Yeah. All right, stop. You're good. Oh my gosh, Jay! Now, what do they say, Jay? Like, what is the deal? Like, for instance, there are some of these food challenges. Like, one food challenge says... that you can't drink a gallon of milk in an hour. You'll get sick, which is true. We've tested it. You do get sick. And so what does this one say? You just can't swallow it. You can't swallow it. There's nothing you can do. So, I mean, you can throw water in. So as soon as I let some out, I'm going to have some water, and then I'm done. Can't we move you so you can be seen on the webcam so we can get people to tune in? That's not a bad idea. There you go. There you go. Now you can see. The video camera. Make sure that video. No, I can't see. We have the flip in here, too, so we're going to post it after the show. There you go. There you go. All right. I'm going to puke. One. He's got a little white plastic spoon. One, two, three. It is in his mouth. He's pulling out the spoon slowly. He's got a look on his face like, this is curious. That's what his face looks like. This is curious. It looks like he's swallowing. Is he not? He's swallowing.
Are you swallowing that, Jay? Yeah. Really? Is it good? No. Is it handling like a champion? It's stuck. It's stuck. Is it stuck? Is it like cement? It's okay. He just went to speak. He's like a dragon. He's like a dragon. He just went to speak in the billows of... It's coming out of his nose. Smoke is coming out of his nose. He's puffing cinnamon. Smoke is coming out of his nose. He's puffing cinnamon. It's coming out of his nose. It's coming out of his nose. He's blowing it out of his nose. He's jumping up and down. It's burning. It's burning. He's taking a drink of water. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Holy he was he was like Macaulay Culkin at home alone with the hands up to the face
Oh, it smells like cinnamon everywhere. Oh my gosh, it smells delicious. It's like cinnamon toast in here. Does anyone have any cinnamon toast crunch? Quickly, somebody toast Jay and put butter on him. It smells like Christmas. It smells so good. Jay was holding the cinnamon in his mouth with his mouth closed, and if he would breathe at all, it would come out of his nose. Oh my gosh, Jay. Clouds of cinnamon. His new nickname is Puff. Puff. Puff. How nasty was that? Is it bath? You smell like a Michael Buble song. Wow. Is that bath? Ow, it's all the way down my throat. You just can't swallow. You smell like a Yankee candle. Yeah. You are a champ. Wow. I think he did it. I think he did it. That was impressive. Yeah. I'd give him that one. That's nasty. Don't ever do that, kids, at home. So, question, Jay. Does it... even resemble cinnamon when it's in that quantity? No. It's not even like cinnamon, right? It turns into fire in your mouth. Sand. Spice. Yeah, it's no good. How does your nostrils feel? I'm ready for cinnamon for the rest of my life. It's pretty incredible. My nostrils, it's in my head. Isn't it weird to think that at some point somebody was like, this would taste good on something. Oh, it's so good. Which reminds me, I wonder who the first person to ever try cheese was. Anyway. Oh my gosh, you weirdo. I brought that up as a topic one time. Get the timer ready. First topic.
But, like, how good is it with a little sugar on some toast and butter? Baked in the baked. It's delicious. The first time I tried to make myself, like, some cinnamon toast, I didn't know the difference between cinnamon and cinnamon sugar when I was a kid. So I just, like, poured on that straight cinnamon. When I got in my mouth, I was like. Oh, man. Good job, dude. Woo, Jay. That was hilarious. When's the last time any of you guys, Sienna, Woods, Lauren, had cinnamon toast? Not like homemade. No, it's been years, man. I was a child. Maybe a few months ago. Maybe a few months ago. I'm serious. Jasper loves it, so we eat it all the time. Oh, yeah. It's been 30 years since I've had it. You put it in the oven, too. Let it get real nice and good. I hope we have a still picture of cinnamon puff coming out of Jay's nose. Oh, that was incredible. That first puff was like... I screamed. It was a billow. It was a billow of cinnamon in the air. He was a dragon. All right, so here we go. Now, Woods, you got to get on the camera, too. Okay. Woods, he's going to do the... Mikeyshow.com. Woods, he's going to do the saltine challenge. 60 seconds. I have to eat these. I have 60 seconds to eat all four at the same time and then whistle. Okay. That's what Jay told me. So you're holding four saltines. Is your approach to just bite into all four or one at a time? My approach is to get them all in there. Oh, wow. And I have to chew it.
Swallow or just chill? Swallow, and I have to be able to whistle in 60 seconds. Do we have a timer? Yeah. Yeah, I got it. You got it? I got it. I know when you're going to start. Are you ready? On your mark, get set, go. Three, four seconds. All right. He's chewing, he's bending down, he's got his hands to his knees, and he's bending down over a microphone that we set up in the studio. He's got a look on his face where he's definitely trying really hard. You can tell that he's putting a lot of energy and exerting a lot of energy. He just puffed saltines out of his nose. He's breathing so heavily out of his nose. He has. He has 34 seconds left. Oh, he just got to look like, oh no, oh no. He's pounding his foot like, get this down, get this down. He's looking up at the ceiling. Oh, oh. He has a mouthful of pulp. A mouthful of pulp. He has approximately 20 seconds left. He's got 20 seconds left. He's chewing, he's chewing, he's trying. He's putting his hands up in the air like, come on, come on, come on. Let's rush this process. Set his head back. Chewing with his mouth open. He's never been so quiet in his life. He has 10 seconds. Nine, eight, seven.
Six five four three Was that a yeah, but isn't he going That's amazing It can't be. He did the down through the teeth. Can we turn that mic off? I know. Jay has it in the hallway. Oh, Jay's got it. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I forgot about Mikey. Well, I refuse to do either one. You get shot too, Woods. Yeah, no. I refuse to do either one. Yeah, you've got to get shot because you didn't finish. I'm taking mine in the belly. Oh, no. Oh, yeah.
That loud whistle, we're moving a microphone if you're wondering what that noise is. You take one in the belly, I'll take three in the, isn't that a saying? One in the belly is like three in the bush. Exactly. Three in the butt. You don't want three in the bush. It's like three in the butt. Okay. I have a little target. What is getting on the chest? Is he really? He's holding a case over his face so that it's... It's covered. He's holding the case to his laptop over his face so that he doesn't... Oh, that is a trash can. So where are you going to? The belly? Oh, my God. Better cover that below, too. Wait, wait, wait. Make sure that we have the camera rolling. I don't want it. I'm watching it. Oh! Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. He had his face covered, but not the boy's. I was worried. Let me see your belly. It will pop up. Right there. It's not there yet. Oh my gosh. Oh, smokes. Holy cow. Now Mikey gets a bullseye on the butt. Three, right? Three? Three. Yeah, but we're actually putting a bullseye on Mikey's butt. Who's shooting? Right in the middle. Right in the middle. Do I get to shoot one? Yes. He's waddling like a penguin. He's waddling like a penguin. I'm ready. There we go. Who's shooting first? Wait, wait, wait. I want to get over there so I can watch. Jay's shooting first. And then Woods and then me? Oh, I'm like a little kid. It's exciting.
I'm inside the middle ring. Holy cow. You're inside the middle- oh man. Oh my goodness. Oh my gosh. Hurry up, hurry up. Did you miss? Did I miss? You missed. What do I do? Oh gosh, oh gosh. I just realized Before Sienna goes by the way, it feels like I'm bleeding in my butt By the way, I am going to teach Sienna how to shoot because How do you show me how you? Don't point it at me, but no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no
Sienna thinks that the way you shoot a gun is to just point it at the target. No, you look there. Okay, but what do you do with the sight over here and this? Mike, you have a little face. Please tell me how you do it. You got this here and you got this here. What do you do? What do you do? Okay, but let me just show you. Woods is the one who missed entirely. I'm good. I've gotten cans before. You've got cans, that's for sure. For sure. Mike, I love you. It's okay. I won't hurt you. Oh gosh, oh gosh. I'm nervous. That was the best shot. I did it! I didn't get to Target. Holy cow. You see? Oh, my gosh. There's no prize for getting the best shot. Yeah, there is. I'm bragging right. I'm bragging right. I get to approve those pictures that you're putting up, by the way. Sienna, that scared me so bad. Are you going to be able to sit, Mike? I can't. I'm telling you, it felt like that first one. I was like, oh, man, that had a little spin on it, didn't it? Oh, he's getting a red mark on his belly right where the thing hit. Oh, my gosh. I love that game. As long as I get to shoot.
We still have not said the word of the day yet. Sometime between now and 10 o'clock, we will say the word of the day, which is fiesta. And when we use it in a sentence, you'll be caller number nine at 570-1949. What an appropriate song, pal. That's right. It's so good. When you hear that word, caller number nine gets wild animal park tickets. Not sure if you've heard about this, but Dodge is involved in this controversy with PETA because they... blew up a monkey in one of their commercials. What? Dude, it's so crazy. You're either going to think that PETA had a point or PETA is ridiculous. And we have the commercials. We'll tell you what they did to correct it next. Number one alternative song in the country right now is by Paramore. The only exception is the name of the song. Sounds like Coldplay.
Coldplay with Avril Lavigne. Yeah, if Coldplay and Avril Lavigne had a baby, it would be Paramore. It's perfect. It's perfect. Right? So dead on. The Mikey Show is me. I'm Mikey, and that's Woodsy right across from me. Hi. And that's Lauren O'Brien, the blonde girl, sitting over there to my right. And the girl sitting here to my left, that's Sienna. Sienna will only be with us until Friday. I know. Friday is her last day. Jay is our producer. He's 47. Until I go on maternity leave. I'll be back. She's going on maternity leave Friday. Wait, what? I know. I'll be back. Friday is her last day. And then maternity leave. She takes some maternity leave and has a baby. When's the due date? The 27th? Yeah, next Friday. Yeah. So I'm giving myself a- A week. Yeah. To kind of put my feet up. I believe that the baby will be born two days before that. Me too. Really? The 25th. Todd thinks the 26th. Yeah. The day before. I'm going to go with the 22nd because that's my lucky number. Wow. You say Sunday.
Yeah, she'd be stoked. I went to the doctor yesterday, and I really wanted her to be like, you're in labor now. Yeah. Didn't happen, obviously. You're 18 centimeters. 18. You don't get 18 centimeters. Whatever. You're 144 centimeters. How'd you do that? We have got to get you in here. Speak for yourselves, ladies. Oh, wow. Oh, boy. Oh, wow. What does that even mean? I don't know, but I just threw up my mouth after saying it. And next week, I'm having surgery, and so... We've got to take a couple of days off. Just a couple, and then I want back in here. You know what I mean? Give me back. Staple me up. Hey. Let's see. Oh, Dodge. Okay, so Dodge, they have a commercial, and in the commercial, they are doing a big sales event. I'll play the commercial for you. Right now at the Dodge 10 event, when you buy a new Charger, Journey, or Grand Caravan, Dodge will give you 60 days to decide if you want to keep it. They'll even cover your payments. This event could not be more amazing. Oh, wait, there's a monkey. I stand corrected. So, let me explain. Let me explain. The monkey is wearing a little Evel Knievel costume, okay? And the monkey walks up to a big plunger for dynamite, and he pushes down on the plunger.
and then the shot changes and it's a wide shot of the whole parking lot and all you see is a bunch of confetti go so you don't see a monkey explode you just you're supposed to infer that the monkey blew himself up with confetti so pita flipped out and what pita did was uh you know apply pressure which is what they do and um dodge said yeah sure you know what we'll do will make the monkey invisible. And so now the commercial sounds like this. Right now at the Dodge 10 event, when you buy a new Charger, Journey, or Grand Caravan, Dodge will give you 60 days to decide if you want to keep it. They'll even cover your payments. This event could not be more amazing. Oh, wait, there's an invisible monkey. Unbelievable. So all they did was go in there and digitally make it so that you can't see the monkey, but you see the little suit walk up. Nice. It's still implying that there's a monkey. That's right. Now, go to MikeyShow.com right now, and you can see the videos side by side. You can see the invisible monkey and the visible monkey, and you can watch both videos and see, wow, what, you know, is my...
They didn't actually blow up a monkey. No monkeys were harmed in the filming of this commercial. Yeah, they're not clubbing baby seals either. No one thinks that they blew up a monkey. Yeah, maybe PETA relax. Yeah, seriously. And you guys know me. I love animals, but come on. Imagine a PETA meeting. Oh my God, can you imagine? You'd be so screaming. No, you listen to me, you idiot farmer. Yeah. There probably had to be an actual monkey there. That could like represent and speak to what how the monkey felt about right That's it I understand Can I ask you something? Why do you think that these people at Dodge hate you so much? You poor darling. You poor darling. I'm so sorry. Oh my gosh, that's heartbreaking. That's heartbreaking Let me ask you something. How have you been coping with this? Oh my gosh. You poor little thing. You sweet little sweetheart. I'm so sorry. Oh my gosh, no. Do you want to be set free? Oh no. She's throwing stuff now. She's drunk. The monkey. The monkey is wasted. I don't blame her. That's the other thing. Now I developed a problem because of it.
You put it on monkey Prozac. How do you like that? So anyway, they changed it. You can see it in the video if you want to. Invisible monkey. Felt like I was outside my body. I had to try hard not to laugh. What are eight annoying things that couples do? Make out in public. That is one. Yeah, PDA, too much PDA is definitely one of them. One is when they morph into one person. You have two different people like different things. Then all of a sudden it's, I love the Chargers. Oh, my gosh, me too. We walk out in our matching Chargers jersey and, you know, stuff like that. Doesn't that happen to everyone, though? Doesn't it? It kind of does, right? I mean, you kind of have to if you're going to live in a house with a guy. Well, I mean, don't you kind of, you find them adorable? I'm a Charger fan, and Todd is a diehard Steeler fan. Yeah, I guess you're right. And I've let the Steelers come in. Ooh, Sienna. But he knows that I will always be a Charger fan. So Chargers play the Steelers. You're Chargers all the way. Oh, Chargers all the way. I guess you're right. The whole time I dated Matt, he was a Steelers fan. Never became a Steelers fan. You never liked something that your chick liked at Woods? Like? Grew to like it. Banned.
No, she likes all my music, which is great, and she genuinely likes it and loves going to shows and stuff. But she likes University of Texas football, so she likes the Longhorns, and I like the Irish, and they have a four-year deal. They have to play each other, so we probably won't hang out. See, I had a girlfriend in high school who could have been a movie character. Whoever she was dating, she became that person. It would be like Jennifer Lopez. Yeah, yeah, exactly. She'd be like ghetto, and then she'd be like a hippie. I was just saying she could be a movie character. Like J-Lo, she has that song Jenny from the Block, she's from the Bronx. When she was dating Diddy. She's a freaking Yankee fan, right? Yeah, then she dated Ben Affleck. And then she's all hugged up at Red Sox games. She's like preppy at Red Sox games. I'm like, you can get it. Yeah, that's how, yeah. Take that big butt down the road. Some girls do that. What else? When you become a package deal, like say you get an Evite. Yeah. I totally do this. Oh, 100%. I totally do this. Todd and I will be there. Yeah. Yeah, count us in. Yeah, well, what are you going to do? They say that why can't people just reply for themselves? Yeah. Oh.
Okay, I could see replying for yourself, but you're going to bring them, right? Is that with a weird thing? Well, no. I mean, you're not always a package deal. Yeah. You know, bachelor party, stuff like that. Oh, yeah, bachelor party. Is this talking about married couples or just dating couples? Couples in general. I guess either or. The PDA touching each other. I like it. In public. You like it? Yeah, I'm a PDA guy. Do you like seeing it? Doesn't bother me. I don't care about hands that wander. I don't like seeing kissing. It's gross. I'm always smooch my wife in public. But like a peck is different. You're all hands with me. I don't know what you're talking about. That's true. I am. Yeah, peck isn't going to bother anybody. I don't French. Frenching outside is a little over the line. You know where I always see it, obviously, is at the airport. Oh, yeah. When we came back from New Orleans, I had about a 45-minute wait before my wife picked me up. Weird. There was, like, couples just outside. Like, making out? Like, full on, making out, saw a little boob grabbage. Gross. I was like, holy smokes. Boob grabbage. It would creep me out to see a dude, like, Frenching a girl.
At the airport. Oh, I see it all the time at the airport. What about the people that sit when you're at a restaurant? They sit on the same side of the table and make out the whole time. I don't make out. You sit on the same side of the table? I'm a same-side sitter. I like to. Jamie doesn't like it, but I like to. I do, too. I like it. Todd doesn't like it. Why are you guys same-side sitters? I'm a same-side sitter. You're cozy. It's real sweet. Hand on the leg. Oh, gosh. You know, I can do either or. I can do either. I don't have a preference, but I'll do either or. I could be a same-side sitter. Sometimes I like to same side sit. Same side sit. If we're going to, like if we're looking at something. Yeah. I mean, there's times where the same side sit is called for. Yeah. But if that's your go-to move, you've got problems. Well, like what if it's a big booth? I like to slide over next to you. I don't like to sit across from you. Slide over real sweetly. Yeah, what's the matter? Because then you've got to turn your head the whole time you're talking. You turn your body. Most people do the across from each other. Lauren's right. I usually do the across, but I like the sit next to. Sometimes I'm feeling like a little snuggle is in order. I'll do the same side sit, or we're going to look at something together. But generally, if you're going to show up at a restaurant, they're going to put a menu across. Yeah.
They will. Maybe I do have a preference. I think I would prefer that, but I have no problems with sitting next to her. Jamie sits on my lap at a restaurant, so it's not even that big of a seat. That's a trippy thing. No, she doesn't. It's creepy. That's what she does with me, too. Oh, boy. It's tough for me, too, because I have to sit on a booster, and that's not easy to do. What happens when you have to be sitting in a high chair, Mike? Then what do you do? That's tough, too, because, well, and I get all the, I get peas in my hair. I would like to see that. Peas in your beard. Peas in my beard. No, no. Another annoying thing that couples do is walk really, really slow on the sidewalk, holding hands. I love that. Yeah, but if you're walking behind him, you're like, all right, I can't get around you. I can't get around you. I'm always hyper. I'm hyper aware girl about the people that are coming from behind me. Really? Oh, always. What else? I didn't do it. I didn't do it. The couple that's like, oh, I can maybe go to the dinner on Friday. Let me check with Todd, and then we'll see if I can do it. Well, aren't you a complete jerk if you're like, yeah, I'm in, and your spouse already has a plan? That's me, dude. Yeah, but don't you know now to check with Jamie? Somebody's got to take the bull by the horns, and, you know, I...
tend to think that I kind of... I do it. Watch your words. I dictate kind of what we do. It's sad. I know. I'm kind of a D, I guess. But I'm like, hey, this is what we've got going this weekend. I defer to Rebecca gladly. I don't want any part of my social calendar. I take the bull by the horns. Would it be like... In fact, I messed it up. I just screwed it up. We were supposed to go out to dinner with Jared. Yeah. Subway. Yeah. No. Create your design online. Yeah. We were supposed to go out to dinner with Jared and his wife, Tiff. And so I'm looking at my calendar for this week. So I look, and it says, Friday, dinner with Jared and Tiff. And so I write him, because that was a long time ago. That you said it. That was there. So I wrote him an email, which I'm not supposed to do this. I went outside of, like, protocol. Clown. I directly write him an email and say, hey, are we still on for Friday? He writes me back and he says, I don't know, let me check it out. Writes me back and says, well, I just talked to Tiff about it. She got her schedule changed so that we can make it. Yes. And I'm like, oh, wow. So he had her do it right then. So I go to Rebecca and she goes, no, baby, they canceled. And so he thought that I was.
really wanting to, and so he had her change her schedule. Rebecca already knew what was up, but I didn't consult. It's a lack of communication. Yeah, so now I've messed everybody's schedules up because... I feel like it's a little different when you're married because you do have kind of plans together most of the time, especially with dinners, but it would be annoying if you were just kind of like... Say I get into a new relationship and I'm dating... A black guy. A black guy, yeah. Okay, let's call him Jerome. Yeah. So I'm dating him, and then someone's like, hey, do you want to go do a girls' night or go see a movie on Friday? I'd be like, well, let me see what Jerome's doing first. Yeah. I feel like that is maybe more than it. Well, what if it's on a Friday night? Isn't Friday and Saturday nights kind of traditionally a night you would spend with your couple as a couple? One of them, but not when you work in the radio and you can't do anything during the week. Well, yeah, but we're speaking in generalities here. Okay, not when you work. Period. And you can't do anything during the week. You can't just totally designate that to, especially if you're in a new relationship. I think even being married, I think the biggest thing is not to be like, let me check with Todd. I think it's like, you know, let me check my calendar and I'll get back to you. I would just never say, let me check with my significant other. I just feel like you seem like a loser. Even now as a married person. I wouldn't, yeah, I wouldn't say, let me check with Todd. I would just say, let me check. Oh, listen.
Rebecca probably doesn't have to say, let me check with Mike. But the only reason she doesn't have to is because she's the calendar keeper. I'm the calendar keeper. So you're good to go. I'm the calendar keeper. Yeah, you're good to go. Really? Yeah, if you're the keeper of the calendar. Oh, that's true. That's true. I guess Todd would say it. Why do I feel like a jerk? You shouldn't. Should I let my wife do the calendar? Maybe I do. Maybe you let her have a couple weekends in there. I just don't want any part of it, you know? Because I'm not good at it. I walk up to her, like, I change plans on the fly. I'm like, oh, by the way, everybody's coming over for a barbecue. She's like, oh, okay. Oh, yeah, don't do that. That kills her. I would not be married if I did that. It kills her. I'm sure it kills her. She doesn't say it, but I'm sure it does. Because Jamie's the one that has to do the cooking and all of that to prepare. Well, yeah, I mean, like, for example, we went surfing Saturday. We were planning on spending the entire day at the beach. Well, it was 50 degrees and freezing. And so we were out there about an hour and I go.
you know what, just have everybody over the house and we'll just grill out. Did you check with her first or did you say it in front of everyone? I said it in front of her. I said, hey, hon, everybody's coming over to have a barbecue. Oh, wow. And she's like, oh, okay. But I went to the store. I paid. I got all the food. I started to do all the cooking and she ended up finishing it. That's one of the things, though, that, like, guys do it. Like, if she had done that to you, you would have flipped. I could have never done that to Todd. And that won't fly in my house. What? Just saying, hey, babe. We're going to have 40 people over to the house right now. Not 40. It was like six. Hey, babe, we're having people over to the house right now. No. Well, you've got kids. I go, hey, what do you think about if we had people come over, blah, blah, blah. Six months. It's 40 degrees here. It's, you know, what do you think we'd go back? She'll probably say yeah, but if I surprise her with it, me too. I don't want to be surprised. I don't want to be surprised. I'm sorry. I'm a D. I know that. Another annoying thing that couples do is try to make more couples. Oh, you're single? Oh my gosh, I have this friend that you should totally hook up with. We can go on a double date. I don't know why we do that, but we do. We do. Because you know why we do that? Because we want the dream. You want a commiserate. We want the dream, man. I want my best friend.
with my wife's best girlfriend, and we're all one big happy family. We live on the same block. We hang out. We drink beers out in the driveway on the weekend. Their kids are the same age as your kids. If I had my druthers, man, all my best friends would live on my street. All of our kids would grow up together. They'd all play Little League together. That would be my fantasy. That's cool. Yeah, I would love that. What else do we hate? That would be cool. The inside jokes that couples say to each other. Yeah, you know what? I think inside jokes bother everybody regardless of whether it's coming from a couple or whatever. And then the last one, which is the one that gets every friend of yours that's single is when you disappear. And you're like, oh, I'm off with my new boyfriend now or my husband and I never go out anymore. I have no problem. And your other friends are like. Okay, what about me? Can we hang out one time? Yeah, everybody does it. You have to put a conscious effort not to do that. Yeah, man, because you want, and especially if you're in a new relationship, you're like, oh, you just want to be with them all the time. I'm like that with my wife, though. I get real, like, I'm like, God, I just want to be with her by ourselves, you know, a lot. This is a trippy story. There was a plane crash yesterday in Colombia. There were 131 people on board. But wait till I tell you about casualties.
It's going to shock you. It's a trip, this story. M1 Christina, are you there? Yes, I'm here. Christina, what was the word of the day? It was Fiesta. Fiesta! It was Fiesta. You got yourself some Wild Animal Park tickets. Very good job, Christina. You did great. Did we get your info yet or no? No, not yet. Hang on the line, please.
Sienna, what's going on in the news? The government announced some new figures yesterday that shows that China is now the world's second largest economy behind the U.S., passing Japan. Japan's been the second largest economy for the last 40 years. And they're saying that by 2030, China will surpass the U.S. as well, which is pretty crazy. Also yesterday, Defense Secretary Robert Gates announced that he plans to leave his job next year. saying that he wants to be gone before the 2012 president election. Really? Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, quite a bit, actually, man. Actually, the Ryder Cup is coming up soon. If you don't know what the Ryder Cup is, it's one of the best golf events in the world. It's the U.S. against Europe. Corey Pavin is making his selections right now. Tiger Woods has not qualified for an automatic bid. They're looking at him. They still don't know if they'll pick him. So that's going to be really interesting to watch the next few weeks. Can you imagine that? And then also the Padres take on the Cubs tonight at 5.05 p.m. in Wrigley Field. John Garland against Randy Wells. And what a bummer. They did not sign their first-round draft pick, Karsten Whitson. Couldn't get the deal done, man. And he is off to the University of Florida, which is a real big bummer. I already know you're going to say no, Lauren. But if it's okay, just say yes. Can we talk about what you were just talking about off the air, on the air?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is a momentous occasion. We can talk about that? Yeah. Wow. This is a very interesting story. And we will get to it in just a second. First, plane crash in Columbia yesterday. How many people on board? 131 people on board. How many people, how many casualties? One person died. Wow, man. One person. Wow. How insane is that? Isn't that nuts? Yes. I mean, they're still looking into what exactly happened to the plane. They think maybe it was struck by lightning in the air. I mean, they don't know. But it hit the ground short of the runway. It skidded on the plane's belly as the...
fuselage. Is that what it's called? Yeah, fuselage. I guess that fractured and it's landing gear and one of the engines ripped off. So the plane, I mean, if you see pictures, it looks like the plane. Oh, scares me to death. The plane literally like ripped in half in these pictures. I mean, it does not look good. And for one person to die, that's a miracle. It's usually the other way around. Yeah. Usually one guy survives. One survives, I know. So yeah, they're looking into what happened, but I mean, that's just a crazy story. One person. Maybe you would drive. Way more fatalities on the road. Still, I'm in control. I'm driving. Aren't I? I'm fine in a plane. Chances are good. This was a smooth flight. Everyone said it was going perfect. Then all of a sudden, bam, they were done. Fall down. Would you ever fly again? Yes. What? Well, the odds of it happening twice are astronomical. The odds of it happening once are astronomical, but still, I don't think I could ever get...
The sack to walk on a plane again. In fact, I would fly the same airline. I think the... You're on the plane tomorrow. Next day. What was it that happened in the plane crash in Alaska a couple weeks ago? Who was it that was in there? It was a senator. A senator, right. That was his second plane crash. There you go, pal. That was his second plane crash. Probably a little plane, though, wasn't it? Yeah. Yeah, it was. You get on those things a bunch. Those things are scary. After you've been in two, no way you're getting back on one. No, I wouldn't. Take a boat. Segway. I'll take a Segway. Yeah. Moped. I'd take a Segway to Hawaii if I was in two crashes. Absolutely. Yeah, I'd take a boat. I'd take a boat. Okay, so L.O.B., tell everybody what you were telling us. My friend that's in a quandary. Yes. She, well, my friend is engaged. They're getting married. I should probably know this. I don't know, sometime next year. And her fiancé. Just recently got a job offer in Chicago, which is not close to here, which is not a warm place for somebody that's used to living in San Diego. Right. And it's quite a significant amount of money as well. And I don't know. It's something to do with finances, stuff that I don't understand. But apparently he's like ecstatic about it, wants to go. And she didn't want to go. She's like, my life is here. My friends are here. I've.
you know built a life here i don't want to go i don't i have zero interest in chicago um so it's kind of like i mean they're not married yet so they're she's just like what do i do like i mean i know i have to support him but doesn't he have to support me like well wait a minute these are the things that i think play into it is his does her job here pay more than his job that he's going to I mean, her job pays pretty well here, and she likes it a lot. She's been there for a while. She's got promoted a couple times. She likes everybody. She likes the work environment. Same amount of money? What do you mean? They would be making the same amount. He'd be making more. She'd have to get a new job, which is not guaranteed also. But does she love her job here? Yeah. Does she love her family? Yeah, I mean, both. I say I give her the deuces, man. I'm out. I'll be in the Windy City kid. Absolutely. You choose job over person. Yeah, and I'll tell you why. And I'll tell you why. Because as somebody that has really tried hard and worked hard to get ahead in life, I'm very satisfied with my relationship with my wife. Very satisfied. But, you know, a couple of years ago, you know, I wasn't really satisfied with work.
And now that I'm satisfied with work, I would do anything to do what we do here now, right? But you wouldn't give up your wife. And it's not a guarantee that that job, I mean, he thinks it's going to be his dream job, but what if he hates it? Then he gave up his girl? Yeah. Well, I mean, you know, I think if they're going to get married, are they going to have kids? They want kids? God willing. God willing, if they can have kids, she's going to be the one having the kids. Right? I mean, that's the only way that it can go. Yeah. He's going to be, in that case, the breadwinner. He's going to be earning money. Not necessarily. When she's having kids, she's going to be working full time. She should be on maternity leave. Santa's about to leave for maternity leave. Right. We're not saying bye to her. No, no, absolutely. But I'm saying for that time, I mean, and I don't know, man. I just think that she should go with him. Because she's a woman and because she can have kids and go on maternity leave. It's more money, too. It's more money for them. It's more money than his current job is paying. But not hers. But she might not get a job in Chicago. And see, I don't see it as a gender thing. I mean, if she had a job here that paid more than the job that he's getting offered, I think you've got to say to this guy, hey, listen, you know, our future is kind of more prosperous here than it is if we move. Yeah, but if she gets a job.
But that's... Oh, she doesn't even have one right now. Not in Chicago. She has one here, but not necessarily in Chicago. Yeah, but Mike, if they just went for money for their future, because like, yeah, it's more security, but your future too with leaving your friends and your family, I mean, that could ruin a relationship. But, you know, for him, that's what he's worked for. And if this is his big, like... What about what she's worked for? Maybe they're not meant to be then. I mean, is this her dream job she's doing here? I don't know if she necessarily has a dream job, but she really likes it. He does. He does have a dream job, and this is it. You know what, though? Listen, if they're dating L.O.B., if they're dating, it's one thing. If you're engaged, you're about to be married. Right. To me, there's no choice. It's about the person, not the job. If you're going to be married, you're... You're married to that person. If it's your girlfriend, I can see you going, hey, later, double deuce, I'm out. So what are you saying? You're saying that he's like, no, everything I busted my ass for in college, I'm going to stay here, and I'm going to be always resenting her because I didn't take my dream job. If he has a job offer, okay, and she doesn't have a job offer, then one of them has more than the other, okay? But he has a job here. She has a job here.
He has what he thinks to be a better job that has more money in Chicago. Is it an offer? Yeah. It's an offer. Well, you said his dream job. This is his dream job. So he has an offer on the table. Yeah, that's what he calls his dream job. He's got a sign and he's in. It's something tangible. It's an actual offer. Okay, does she here have an offer, a tangible offer? She here has a job in Chicago. No offer. No job. Okay, right, right, right. No prospects. Now, this job that he's going to, is it? a higher paying job than the one she's currently in? It's a higher paying job than the one he's currently in and the one that she's currently in. But it would not be a combination of, it wouldn't cover what they both make now. It would just be a lot more than what he's making here. Right. That makes sense. Right. Unless she found a job there. if she found a job in Chicago. But it sounds like the issue is she doesn't want to move to Chicago. No. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if they pay the guy five times out. Well, I mean, in this economy, you can't just be like, oh, and I'll just go to this city and I'll just get a job there. You can't really just assume anymore that you can just pick up and get a job. And she's like, you know, what if I hate my job there? It's cold. I might be, like, miserable in a new city. I won't have any friends there. Hey, listen, if it was reversed, I'd say the same thing.
If it was reversed and it was like it was her job. OK. Right. And she had a job offer in Chicago. Something firm. OK. In writing, they said, this is what we want to pay you. And they're both here. First of all, you know, let's already take into account that they've considered cost of living. And he's here. He's got a job. You go. Well, first of all, the important thing to do if you're smart is that you start looking for a job out there because L.O.B. is 100 percent right. If he currently makes 50 and she currently makes 50, combine they make 100 grand. If he just got a job offer out there for 80, it doesn't make sense. It doesn't make sense for them to leave. But if she can get a job out there that's comparable, then it makes sense. So should she be looking? That's the thing. Of course. What if she doesn't want to go? You're missing her point. No, I totally get the point. And I'm saying if you don't want to go.
that's where you defer. And I'm saying that from a man's perspective too. If, if she had a job offer out there as a guy, I should be supporting you. You got a job offer that if I can at least get what I have here, we're better off. It means your dream job. It means that we're better off than we are here, especially in Chicago. Cause it's going to be, it's expensive to live in Chicago, but I'm going to, it ain't San Diego and how expensive it is here. And so, As a guy or girl, doesn't matter. I mean, in my opinion, you go, well, I at least owe it to you as my better half, which I got to consider if we're getting itched. To at least be looking for a job comparable to what I'm already doing. Yeah, but also then. Conceding to, okay, I'm giving up my friends, my family, my lifestyle, my job that I like. But that's a risk you can also take when you get married. It's like you're no longer I, you're we. And if that person needs to go somewhere, like, man, sometimes you have to do it if you don't want to. Well, I mean, that's kind of why she's like, well, we're not married yet. And maybe, you know.
There's a reason why there's an engagement period before the marriage. Whoa. See, that would trip me out. And that's what I'm saying. It's obvious that this guy's worked hard. She's worked hard. She's happy. She has her bit here, her life, and everything is great. They're not married yet. And if I'm him, I'm like, I have to go to her because I had to do this. I mean, Jamie and I weren't the greatest we've ever been, but I was like, hey, listen, I'm doing this. This is a dream come true for me. Coming here. Coming here, doing what we do every day. I'm like, I am taking everything that I've ever done and I'm throwing it aside. I'm packing my car and I'm going, I have to go for this. And if that's the way this guy feels, man, I'd hate because what's going to be awful is him here going. I can't believe I passed that up. I can't believe I passed that up. Let me make it more difficult for you, Woods. Let me make it more difficult for you to see where you are with this. And I want everybody listening right now to ask yourself, what would you do in this situation? Okay, so here we are, you and L.O.B., okay? You guys are engaged. Yep. You're here in San Diego. L.O.B. has a great job. Let's say that her job pays her $100,000 a year. Okay. You have a job here that pays you $50,000 a year. Okay. Your guys are getting married. Combined, you have a combined income of $150,000. Yep. You get offered your dream job in Chicago for...
80K a year. Okay. How much is, what's the difference? 70K. 70K? Yeah, 70K difference. You would be making 70K? I'd be making 30 grand more, but with just me having a job, it'd be a 70K difference. Because I'd be making 80, she'd be making nothing, and we used to make 150. Right. So it'd be a 70K difference. Would you take that job? But knowing that by staying here, you're better off financially with your wife. You know, and again, it depends on what it is. Now, if the freaking Cubs called me and said, hey, we want you to come, you know, be the GM or the assistant GM or, you know, you're going to do something. You're going to be the head of ticket sales for the Cubs. I'd be like, absolutely. That's something I've always wanted to do. OK, then will you admit this? Because I'm going to put you in the corner on this. Yeah, go ahead. Will you admit to me? that the Cubs mean more to you than your fiancé L.O.B. Will you admit that right now live on the radio? No, I won't admit that. I won't admit that, man. I won't, but again. You have to call the Cubs general manager, and by the way, you've got his business card. It's got the Cubs emblem on it. He's ready for me. And in gold.
On the card. I don't know, man. It has his name. And it says team president. All I know, dude, is that my dad packed us up and moved us to Connecticut. He packed and moved us to Denver. And you know what my mom did? She went. She went. Yeah, but here's the thing, too. But my mom also didn't have to work in some spots. She had options. My dad didn't have any options. He had a family he had to provide for. Yeah, and you already had a family with kids that you had to provide for. Exactly. They don't have that yet. And when you're talking like. You being plucked out of corporate America doing recruiting, which you weren't necessarily like, yeah, this is my dream job to do the Mikey show. Sure. That is a whole nother ballgame than like this guy has a job here. He's doing the finance bit, whatever. But if he gets the call from the majors in Chicago, the big leagues are saying, hey, kid, come out here. And you're also saying that I choose this job as. A higher. Fine. Yeah. Fine. But I mean, I agree with Woods. I work. I like to work, man. And I'm going to be able to take care of her where I am right now with this job. Like, oh, my gosh, I worked so hard to get here. And there no way was I going to let anything get in my way. Like, this is my dream job. I'm in San Diego. Like, I'm you know, this is exactly what I wanted to do. Knock a wood. And and it's like Todd moved away at one point in our relationship and I didn't go. Yeah, I was like, I'm not going. And I knew I wanted to be with him.
but he had to come back to be with me. If you were engaged, though, and somebody said, somebody's putting, and this is essentially what I did to Woods, I took a gun. Put it to my head. I took a gun. No, no, no, no, no. Put it to me. No, no, no. The Cubs are over here and L.O.B.'s right here. And I says, Woods, pick one. Who's getting it? And Wood said, shoot Lauren. I don't know. I guess. But Sienna's kind of proving my point. She stayed here. She was like, here's the job that I want. Here's the lifestyle that I want. My family's here. I took a complete risk. I'm giving you a revolver. You got the Mikey show or Todd? Which one gets the bullet? Well, Todd and I are married now and having a baby, so I would choose Todd. Okay, but let's say you weren't having a baby, but you were engaged. You got to choose. Here's the revolver. Choose Mikey, the Mikey show, or Todd. Who's getting the bullet? You gotta plug one of them. I can't. You gotta whack one. You gotta whack one. Todd's getting it, dude. Are you whacking Todd? For the Mikey show? I can't put myself in that mind now that I'm pregnant. I'm sorry, but if I was with somebody that I loved, 11 times out of 10, the job would get the bullet. Shoot the job. I guess the job would. You can't take your job to the grave. Yeah, but...
I'm like, I just, okay, the way I would think of it is there's no way that both of them have their dream. We have a job that's different than most, and we're very, very lucky, so it's hard to compare. This has turned into the greatest conversation we've ever had. No, I would choose Todd. There's no way I wouldn't choose him. She hesitated. Let me clear that up. But I love my job, you know, so it's like, man, that's hard. I think a lot of people feel this way. A lot of people feel this way where they're like, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, I'm in a quandary, I'm in a quandary, I'm in a quandary. Yeah. And maybe it comes from that old school, like, I'm the husband, and I'm here to protect you and to put a roof over your head and close your back and give you whatever that I can give you. Like, that's what it comes from. That's how my dad was. That's how his dad was. My grandmother never worked one day in her life, but she did. But you chose this job not out of... Financial security, you chose it because it was more glamorous than what you were doing and a better fit for you. Oh, it's such a better fit for me. But that wasn't anything about providing insecurity. Lauren, you're saying the same thing, though. What do you mean? Because you're saying you'd choose the person over the job any day, but she's choosing to stay here with her. She's choosing her friends and the job over him by not going with him. Well, that's why it's a quandary. I'm not saying that me and my friend have the same point of view, but that's why it's a quandary for her. One's about me. One's about we.
The me is, it's me, my friends, my, you know, my, me, me, me, me. And one's about we. One decision is about we. So what are you saying that she should do? She should go, which one of them is, where are we better off? Right. If she, I said it right from the very beginning, she, in my opinion, should be looking for jobs right now in Chicago. But she's not. But she's the one that presented this problem. Yeah, because he's got an offer. Yeah, but he went sniffing around for it. You don't know that. Well, maybe he came to it. Yeah, but he's trying to get his dream. He's not sniffing around doing something shady. He's trying to get his dream. He's the one that like uprooted. They were engaged. They were on track to. He's the one changing the course. They're going to buy a home here. He changed the course. You know what? Before he ever started going and looking in Chicago for a job, he should have said, hey, babe, what if I looked for a job in Chicago? Yeah. So literally, they're sitting out, they're at a restaurant, and he goes, oh, by the way, I got an interesting offer today for X amount of money in Chicago. Was she blindsided? Well, he's got a headhunter that has his resume out there for major firms. Well, she's got to know that the capital of finance, as great as San Diego is, ain't San Diego. M1, Darren, are you there? Hello? Darren, where are you from? Escondido. Cool. What were you calling to say?
I was going to say that I would stay with my wife. That's my future wife. And, you know, like L.O.B. was saying, you take your wife to the grave. You know, we're married. I would, you know, there's plenty of jobs out there. And just for a dream job that, you know, I would say no. I'm saying that she should go. Like, my thing is that she should go with him. I think so, too. That's my stance. Now, put yourself in her shoes. Your family's here. You lived here your whole life. Say you're not on the Mikey show, but say you're happy with what you're doing. I would have, well, I just think of before this show started, I would have gone. You would go to Chicago? If it was your fiancé. Yeah. But you said Todd left and you didn't go with him. Yeah. But they weren't engaged. But we weren't engaged, yeah. They were dating. That's way different. And I didn't know, yeah. Like she wanted to be with him, he wanted to be with her, but he left and she's like, well, we're not engaged or anything. Listen. It is, if you're dating. Who makes the cold? It's poop or get off the pot if you're dating. If you're dating. If you're engaged, you might as well be married. Yeah. Yeah, if you're engaged, you're married. If you're engaged, you're married. Right, right. Yeah, and if you're talking about like, okay, I'm looking for this, I'm going, like.
For me, it would at least be up to discussion. They can't both have their dream jobs. What are the odds of that? One of them wants this dream more than the other, and that person should get to have it. I feel like they both kind of feel like, well, I'm in my dream job situation. She looks like she's looking for a way out to me. It feels like she's like, I'm getting back going. Not at all. She's really happy. She's put a lot of time in. She's really happy. Then when he was getting a headhunter, why didn't she say, Well, as long as the headhunter... She did? Yeah. So the headhunter's only going to find you jobs in San Diego. Yeah, I think that it was kind of like her mind's been on the wedding and everything like that, so she hasn't really necessarily like, okay, babe, go do your thing, whatever, you know? And so she didn't think Chicago was going to be in the mix at all. I think as far as she thought, like San Francisco, farthest away, which she could have dealt with on the same coast. Well, it's a two-hour longer flight. Yeah. I mean, if it's an airplane, it's an airplane. You know what I mean? Seriously, if it's an airplane, it's an airplane. Chicago's lovely, by the way. It's a cheaper flight, though. Let her know LLB Chicago is lovely. It's a weekend visit as opposed to Chicago's, like, a weekend visit going all the way to Chicago. It's either it's about me or it's about we. How glad are you that you're not in that situation right now? That is hard. Wow, that was good. Hey, there's a study out that finds that men are more likely to cheat on women.
who have this particular quality. What is it that women, what is this quality about women? I'll tell you next. I was so excited. What'd you do? I was so excited about our conversation that we were having when we left that I didn't even get our next song queued up because I was so into it. What we were talking about. In fact, the conversation continued. In the bathroom. You already played this one, pal. I did? Yep. I heard you guys all sniggling. We were. I walked in and went... Yeah, I'm standing at the urinal and Lauren O'Brien opens the men's room door and goes... And you know what's funny? We were so passionate about the conversation. I was... Mikey's at the urinal and I'm just standing right next to him talking. I knew that's what was happening. I knew it. Let's see here. Mikey shows myself, Woodsy, Lauren, Sienna, and Jay. And today our phone screener is Will.
That's wild. That's so funny. Tomorrow it'll be Chris. That's gross. That's gross. Chris. Tonight's 8 o'clock album is Joe Jackson, I'm the Man. Our program director, Garrett. Garrett. Detroit. Seattle. Philly. Philly. Scott Shannon. Has been out of town for a couple weeks, so he's coming back tomorrow. which means that we have to get all these beer bottles out of here. Darn it. Check all our friends out. Maybe we prank him. We should. We should do something. Just a little welcome back from the Mikey show. We missed you, pal. Tell him that Sienna had her baby on the air. Oh, wow. Oh, boy. Maybe I don't tempt fate. Yeah. Maybe you don't. On the air. That would be a little terrifying. So, uh. There's a study out that finds that men are more likely to cheat on a woman that what, Sienna? Exists. That was brilliant! That was brilliant! That one sliced. Look at all the reactions. That one sliced the cojones right off of us, didn't it? Exists. What is it?
Men are more likely to cheat. That devilish little laugh. Men are more likely to cheat on women that make more money than they do. Try me. Wow. Try me. Sugar mama. What do you mean by try me? Try me. What do you mean? Try me. Give me a woman that makes more than him is what he's saying. Sandra Bullock, Jesse James. Be all the way in on it. Could you live with your, I don't, yeah, I could do it. You could? Oh, yeah. You? Yeah. Really? Yeah. I could do it in a heartbeat. Mr. Macho Man? I think you say that. She made more money than me for a while. And we were dating. She paid for everything. Really? Yeah. Sugar Mama. Real good. You cheat on her? No. Why'd you look to the left? I didn't. Son of a bitch. Wow. That is not even funny. Oh, my gosh. Different time. Different man. He's a different place. Oh, boy. Oh, Jamie. Time. Whatever. I didn't. You guys, it's because, you know, men. Insecure. Yeah, they have a hard time. They're threatened. No. But women making, it says women making more money than men may threaten the male's traditional view of being the breadwinner. But the study also found that women who depend on their male partners for money were half as likely to cheat as women who made the same amount. They don't want to jinx that. I need to get fed. They don't want to jinx that. I want to know where to go. I want to go.
Give me the gold. I want the gold. Hang on to that, sugar daddy. They don't want to ruin it. It's terrible. I mean, I kind of see it. Yeah, you can see it. We get emasculated really easily, but Jamie was working at Sharpie and making a lot more money than me. As in the pen. As in the pen, yeah, and was making a company cart. Not a cart. you know, was shaped like a Sharpie. That would be awesome. It left black lines all over the road. It was an Impala. But no, she had a company car, expense account, free gas. I was like, man, it's kind of nice. Girls doing all right. Well, it says that men that are in relationships with girls that make more money than they are are five times more likely to cheat on a woman that makes the same amount as they do. It shouldn't have anything to do with how much money you make. It shouldn't, but it does. They start justifying. Oh, my gosh. I can because she makes more money than me? Eye roll. She works too much. Guys want to feel like the man, so they find some other girl that will make them feel like the man. You don't make anything. M1 Malone. I make more than you do. Yeah. Malone, are you there? I almost said a bad word. Go ahead. Yeah, well, you know, I was in a similar position once. I dated a girl.
made more money than me, and she ended up cheating on me for a high executive at her business. There you go, pal. Skank. Slurty done. He said total it. Total it. Totes. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Yeah, you know, I just wanted to put in my two cents about that. It goes both ways. Yeah, it does, for sure. Thank you. There's exceptions to the rule, but generally speaking. It shouldn't have any, you know, our fidelity shouldn't have anything to do with it. And I don't really... Do you guys like the fact that your wives aren't working right now, though, and that you're the breadwinners? I love it. I think that you wouldn't want Rebecca to go back to work. Yeah, I don't. And she's talked about it, and when she does, I just stay quiet. You wouldn't ever want her to go back? I want her to be happy, and I mean that. I really do, but I like it the way it is now. Yeah. I like her. I enjoy, and it has to do with the kids. Yes. I like the fact that my kids are getting a mom that's around. They're going to grow up. They're going to go off to school, and she's going to be like... Yeah, what if she starts working when they go to school? Then you have more kids. I think Mike's done that. As long as... No, Jay. Jay Bird. Jay Bird. Yes, get in there. Jay's like, you can never have too many kids. I don't have more right now. Would you really? You know, I'm too old for it, but yeah, I would.
And you would be doing the diaper changes and all that? Yeah, I don't mind the diaper changes. There's so much fun when they get just a little bit bigger. And they're like a year. It's like, oh, the cutest. I think it would be great if we could fast forward right now. 18 years. My boys are in college, you know? And I'm retired. Oh, that'd be fantastic. I'd be like, hey, Jake, coming home this weekend? You're not? Okay, well, I guess your mom and I will just be walking around nude. I'm sure you will be, too, because you're my son. That's right. Jamie has her consulting thing, but she's in real estate classes, and she's going to sell real estate. She's going to be a real estate mogul, is what she tells me. Nice. That's cool. Yeah, which is rad. I come from a family of workers. I've always been a worker, and I support it, man, whatever she wants to do. When we have kids, you know. We'll do what we have to do. What if she didn't have the time to make you dinner and stuff like that anymore? I'd be fine. I lived here for two months without her. I made my own dinner every night. And now you're used to it. Yeah, but I'd be fine. One of my friends called me one time. He said, you're a minimalist. You don't need much, man. And I don't. I need a TV. And I am not Jay. You're not going to drop me off in the country. I'm not going to survive out in the woods. But I'm fully self-sufficient. I can cook. I can clean. I can do all that. I just choose not to. I don't know.
She can still make dinner, too, and stuff like that. I'm saying, what if she didn't? What if she started working that much? I'd probably drop the hammer on her a little bit. Well, wouldn't you want, if you guys have kids, though, Woods, wouldn't you want... Jamie to be home with the kids? Yeah, and you know, I think, bro, I would want to be home with the kids, man. I want to be, and that's the best thing about this job is that by the time we're done, I'll have all freaking day to play with my kids, and I love that about what we do. I'll be able to coach Little League, man. I'm not going to be on the phone ripping the mic every day. What? Why are you rolling your eyes? What? What? You'll have all day. Well, I'll have some time to spend with them. I like, you know, let's say noon. I get to hang with my kids all day. You get to always pick them up from school. Absolutely, man. I love that Jay does that with Jasper. That's what I want to do. Yeah, but it's not like we just get off and have all day and do nothing. No, absolutely not. You guys? Yes. Who's this? I was calling because you guys are trying to...
diminish the role of an independent woman. Oh, is this Captain Buzzkill? Captain Buzzkill? Yes. What do you mean by that? I think that Woods and Mikey are diminishing the role of an independent woman by saying she should just be home taking care of kids. I think that's wrong. I think Woods was saying he was actually all about his wife working. Yeah. I think if she wants a career, she's certainly smart and capable enough to have a career, for sure. Why do you want her to stay home with a kid? I would like, it would be nice to have one of the parents to be around for our kids when they're growing up. I think that's very important. I think that robs women of their independence. I think the person that should be on the spit here is Mikey, but oddly enough, he's not available. Yeah. Yeah, Mikey, I think it's wrong that you're trying to rob a woman of her independence because you want Rebecca to just stay home and not work. Oh, is she supposed to be barefoot and pregnant too? I'm not even saying that. I just, all I said, what is this guy's name? Captain Buzzkill. All I said, Captain Buzzkill.
was that I thought that it's great for our kids, that's all. Yeah. But you, at the same time, don't you want her to... Don't you want her to have a life, Mike? Of course I want her to have a life. I'm just saying, I think that that's really... You know, Captain Busco, why don't you just mind your own business? You just let your wife have a life, you weirdo. How does that make him a weirdo? How does it make me a weirdo? Because all you are is just... You know what? You guys can all go to hell. Oh, my gosh. Wow. Don't tell us that. Captain Buzzkill. Get out of here. He dropped the hammer. Captain Buzzkill. Really a Buzzkill. Woods was just lying on the floor, rolling around like a seal. Emily and Dane from Carmel Mountain. Are you there? Yeah, I'm here.
Go ahead. Yeah, so, you know, your conversation that you guys were having about everything, you know, I got a girlfriend that's in law school. I'm going to school for computer engineering. She pops up that she wants a kid. So what I'm wondering is, who's going to be taken more seriously in the end? You know what I mean? Her position would be an attorney. Mine would be a computer engineer. Who's going to take on the responsibility of the kid? Well, have you guys, had you guys ever talked about kids before? We have, you know, and it's gotten more serious as time goes on. Were you open to the idea of having kids? You know, I am. But, I mean, like I said, we've set so many goals before this topic came up. Okay. So I'm a little bit concerned, you know. Well, if she has said that she wants kids and you have talked about it in the past and you've been open to the idea of kids, then obviously one of you guys is going to have to stay home.
Look after the kid. I mean, just for a little bit, though, like my husband and I both work, and we both have full-time jobs, but you get a daycare, you find family, and you just try to find a way to spend as much time with your child as you can. You do what you got to do. Yeah. Definitely, definitely. And I think we brought up the conversation because the reason we want to have a kid, we're a little bit on the younger side, but we were just talking about how great it would be to be in our early 40s and be able to go out with our 21-year-old kid. Have a good time, you know? How old are you now? 23. Wow. Well. Yeah. You know, listen, this is a fact of life. You're going to, if you both want kids, you're going to have kids. And you've got to figure out who's going to. And you should still be able to have the job that you want, too. You'll find a way to make it work if she's the right girl. Yeah, there's nannies, there's daycare, there's part-time work. It's everything. Yeah, it's just been spinning around in my head, you know? Like, I just want to make sure that it's not going to end up like, whoa. I'm the attorney, so you have to be a stay-at-home dad over there. Right. We'll make sure that you're clear about that. How am I doing that stuff? Don't get me wrong. You may be stoked if that was your job, too. Oh, yeah, of course. Come on, you know. I'd be the one driving the BMW with the kid. Take a listen to this. Take a listen to this, Dane, because this is an actual stat from AskMen.com. They asked a bunch of men, in your opinion, which of the following is the ultimate male status symbol? Here are the choices.
Having a family, having a high-profile career, having a beautiful wife or girlfriend, or something else. I say high-profile career. Ditto. This is the priority. Ultimate male status. Ultimate male status. What did men say was the ultimate male status? Having a family, having a high-profile career, having a beautiful wife or girlfriend, or something else. Two. A. B. That little B says B. J. I say B. I say B. Okay, so Jay, Woods, and Lauren said a high-profile career. Sienna said having a family. Yeah. I like to hope myself was right. Myself was right. Sienna was correct. Yes! Oh, look at you. Liars. I know. They're liars. That's what I would say. I thought we were looking for what the comedy nominator was. 36% said having a family. 26% said a high-profile career. And 21% said a beautiful wife or girlfriend. 17% had other thoughts. Well, it kind of makes sense because if you look at the average guy.
There's only, like, you know, there's a much smaller percentage that are in those high-profile positions. Yeah. There you go. Boy, you sure do want them. Some people don't. When you're mid-level. Some people are, like, Chris complacent. A lot of people don't like being a boss type either and telling you what to do. Man, that's not fun. I'll do what I'm told. I'll clock in, I'll clock out. From the men that were asked on AskMen.com, which of the following characteristics best defines a real man in 2010, here were the choices that were given. Again, these are the things that define a real man. Being a great father and husband who takes care of his family, or being a great leader and motivator, or having manly skills like the ability to fix things, or being charismatic and popular. What? Being a great seducer and or lover, Mikey. What? I love you. I love you. Or being wealthy. Again, being a great father or husband who takes care of his family, being a great leader or motivator, having manly skills, being charismatic and popular, being a great seducer and or lover, or being wealthy, which of the following characteristics defines a real man in 2010. What do you think guys said, Woods? A. You said that they would say being a great father and husband. I agree, yeah. I agree. I say A too. You all agree, and you are all...
Correct. Yeah. Although I believe that most of them think it's money. 50% of them said that being a great father and husband is the characteristic that defines a real man in 2010. How many said the seducer or lover? Only 4% said being a seducer or lover. Yeah, what makes you a real man? The next was being a great leader and motivator. 23% said that. 13% said having manly skills like the ability to fix things. 7% said being charismatic and popular. 4%, great seducer and lover. And 3% said being wealthy. Ironically enough, I am speaking at an event this weekend called The Real Man's Breakfast. Really? Yeah. And it's going to be at my home church, North Coast Church, which is really cool for me because I speak at a lot of churches. I only had the opportunity to speak at my own church a couple of times, so this is a big deal for me. Already there are 500 people that are for sure signed up to go. Are you nervous? I am nervous. It's totally different what we do behind a microphone and then getting up in front of people. It's completely different. I've seen him do his bit. Oh, yeah, he's great. You know what, though? I'm usually not nervous when I do my thing in a different church.
People that you know. Yeah. It's hard. The fact that I'm going to be at my home church at the edge in the new location and all that. I wish I could come out there, man. I'll be in L.A. I would have come watch you speak and probably tried to prank you while you're up there. I'm sure you would. Maybe heckle you. It's the ones that you're the most nervous about that usually you do the best. Oh, man. Is that Mikey up there? That's Jay from the audience heckling me from the audience. Last time I did it, it was the food. Oh my gosh, I hope they're doing the same food. Dude, they grilled pork chops for breakfast with scrambled eggs and potatoes. That is a real man's breakfast. That is a real man's breakfast. It was so good. Jimmy Dean sausages. Jimmy Dean. I don't want the seven ounce Jimmy Dean. I want the 12 ounce Jimmy Dean and I don't want two packages of it. I want one. My wife is fat. My wife is fat and Scottish. Scott Pearl. Yeah. Let's see. There's a woman that just painted herself in body paint and the pictures of her.
in the body paint are causing controversy. L'Angel, by the way. Really? Yep. I'll tell you all about it next. Just telling Woods about L&T, our old friends L&T, radio guys that we know. They just met him at boot camp. They're so great. I mean, they're really nice guys, but I keep hearing these stunts that they pull. Oh, it's hilarious. It's funny, though. It's hilarious. Stunts that they would pull with their guy, Sully. I was telling Woodsy about how they did a thing where they were testing the airbags in a car. So they said, let's see what speed it takes for these airbags to come out of this car. So they put Sully in this car and they, you know, had him all caged in and everything. And they were running him into a brick wall. And they started at five miles an hour. The airbags didn't come out. They went up to 10 miles an hour and they slammed him in the thing at 10 miles an hour. They got all the way up to 25 miles an hour. Sully's black and blue from being thrown around the car. And then they go, Sully.
there's no airbags in that car. That is so messed up. I love it. So messed up. I love it. He loves it. He does. He loves it, man. He does. We met those guys, and they are, I mean, they make that guy do everything. He's like, hee, hee, hee, hee. Yeah. I mean, they're super nice guys. I didn't know that they were statists. The way that they found him was they used to call the 7-Eleven. Prank calls. Prank called the 7-Eleven, and Sully was the guy that used to answer. He's the only guy they said that would talk to him. Everybody else hung up on him, and finally. Lamont went in there and he was like, hey man, I'm going to hire you. I'm going to give you a job. And that was whatever, 20 years ago. Isn't that great? That's genius. Let's see. So what's the deal with this woman in the body paint and all this? Okay, well, this is the Miss Universe pageant, which is coming up next week on the 23rd. And this year, they're using pictures of the contestants wearing nothing but body paint to promote the pageant. Miss Universe? Yes, for Miss Universe. And one of the pictures that they have all over the news right now is the former Miss Universe. She was crowned in 2010. Rima.
Faki Woods. I know, we've said this before. I'm pretty sure that's how you pronounce her last name. But people that work for the pageant, and this one in particular former pageant organization worker is just like, look, this is not what we're about. This is like Playboy type stuff. They're naked wearing paint. You know, this is not... Miss Universe. This is not what it should be portraying. She should be in clothes, at least a bathing suit. The body is a canvas. But you can see, here's one of the pictures, and she looks really pretty. That's Miss USA right now. Beautiful. Or Miss Universe. That doesn't even look like, that looks like a child took some finger paint and painted it onto her body. Like, I was expecting something that actually looked really artistically done. What did you think, like a bald eagle flying out of American flag or something? No. You know, body paint. doesn't look like paint. It looks like somebody's actually wearing clothes. In Sports Illustrated, they paint on the jerseys of a girl. It looks like a real shirt. You can't tell, really, unless you look really closely. Well, this looks like a little kid. In this picture, you see Miss Universe, and she has her back to the camera, and she's turning her head to the side, so you can see her profile. It's like Hannah. And her back. You can see it's a naked back, but there's...
you know, henna paintings basically. What's wrong with it? Well, that's only one of many pictures. All the contestants are wearing nothing but paint. And that's the only picture that I've seen. But, you know, people are upset because that's not what, yeah, weird, Miss Universe should be portraying. How about we do it like we always have? How about not, man? How about just do some change? How about nobody cares? That's why they're trying to step it up. Yeah, they're trying to do something to get people looking. Yeah, see if I can find any more. Yeah, what is this really? It's a bikini contest. Yeah, it's a big bikini contest. Really care about their juggling or their reciting poetry, really? They don't juggle and recite poetry. No, they have platforms in which they answer questions. Yeah, exactly. Do I really care about their views on world peace or hunger or anything else? Okay, then can't we do what we've been doing, which is at least... We know what it is. It's a bikini contest. It's a bikini contest. Okay, fine. But can't we just keep pretending that it's about more than that? No. People don't care, though. The ratings have fallen to the floor. Yeah. And then get rid of it. Oh, okay. Here's better ones where it does look like she has clothes on. Okay. What the? What's up? He's turning around. Oh, wow. Smokes. It looks like a wonderland. Jay just came running in here. It looks like a Rastafarian wonderland. Oh, her body's a wonderland. At least it looks like a...
clothes, you know. It looks like a bathing suit. No, she has to be wearing a bathing suit. Doesn't look like Jake ran in there with some finger paints on his finger. Those are tops. She has a bathing suit on in this one. Their midriffs are painted. Yeah, it's more than what they wear in the bikini concept. How do you get that gig? Oh my gosh. See, I don't know, but you can see these. They're all over the news right now and online if you just, you know, Google it or whatever. They're very tasteful. Maybe that's the next bet. Sienna and Lauren have to get painted. Oh, boy. Maybe I have a kid and have a year to recover. So, Sienna, you'll remember this. Depends on who's painting us, by the way. You'll remember this. I will not. Okay. I want to do the slowed down song. Don't say by who. Slow the song down. I want to do that tomorrow. Okay. Because it sounded really cool. It sounds normal when you play it normal, but then you slow it down, and it's really trippy. That's brilliant. So we'll do that tomorrow. It's already on the schedule. I'm typing it now. Let's see. Oh, we got new releases. We do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stuff that's coming out today in music, DVD, and is that all we do? Yeah. Woods' favorite artist is releasing something today. Trace Adkins, Cowboys Back in Town. Oh, my God.
Is he? Yeah. Great. For real? Welcome to Nashville, pal. Disgusting. The name of the song is Brown Chicken, Brown Cow. Oh, I've heard this. Kill me. Bad Blake just rolled over in his grave. Once he started singing like that, it wasn't as bad. Brown chicken, brown cow. Does he really do that? Yeah, that's what he says right at the end. Like, brown chicken, brown cow. Brown chicken, brown cow. You never heard that? So clever. I'm an idiot. You guys never heard that? No. It's new. Hottest animals in the farmyard? Brown chicken brown cow. It's a joke, like little kids say. Lance just looked at me totally dead-faced. You guys, that's kind of funny. Imagine a little kid saying, what are the hottest farm animals? And you're like, I don't know what. Brown chicken brown cow. They would die laughing. You would laugh. But the kid would probably get the intonation all wrong, and it wouldn't make any sense. I'll have Jasper do it for you. He's pretty good. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Also out, I'm going to say this.
Ray LaMontagne and the Pariah Dogs. God willing and the creek don't rise. More love making music. Never heard of him? Love it. What? You never heard of Ray LaMontagne? Oh, my gosh. I haven't either. I know. You have so. Really? You have. Really, coffee housers? You have heard of him. Is that right? Oh, you're so cool with your Macs. He's mainstream. Oh, yeah. Open up your Apple computer. I bet Rebecca knows who Ray LaMontagne is. Please are ready with it. He's good. It's like sex on a compact day. I obviously don't know very much music, so when I come in to do the new releases before the show starts, I talk to Jesse, the night guy. He helps me, and I'll be like, is this one good? And I'll say it, and he laughs like, are you serious? You don't know that. I'm like, I don't know. You don't know Frank Babins?
Oh my gosh. You don't know the sidewalk swifters? Yes, where have you been? Did you just wake up from a coma from 1985? That's what happened. Okay, but Ray Lamentine is pretty mainstream. Yeah, he's mainstream. Is he? Yeah. Really? Yeah. You guys can do the new releases then. Great. I'm going to do my first one next week. There'll be two of them. Oh, no. No, you have to go through all of them. It'll be like the Brown Spotted Stripes. Yeah. Oh, no. The Brown Spotted Stripes. And Ryan Adams. Ryan Adams. You just wait. Whiskey Town. One of mine I threw in here because only I would put this in here, but we'll get to it in a little bit. Also out, David Gray, Foundling. It's peaceful. I'm in. In. I like his voice. Yeah, people either love or hate his voice. Well, we've played David Gray before, and I wasn't in, but I do like this. I love the piano, man. You have to be, like, really sad to listen to this. Yeah, you do. I like sad music, though. I don't know how to do it. Yeah, you can't play this if it's sunshine outside. You either play this in Portland at night. Or San Diego in the summer. Or San Diego in the summer. In August. Iron Maiden.
The final frontier. Maybe hang it up. It's the final frontier. Yeah, hopefully. And one Maiden fan is like, you shut up. Shut up. Maybe hang him up, pal. Not exactly of the times. Eddie, the big skeleton puppet, just fell over. He's got a cane. He would go, no, but he can't. I don't think that's Bruce Dickinson. I may be wrong, but it doesn't sound like Bruce Dickinson to me. John Mellencamp, No Better Than This. Bad Blake? Sounds like Bad Blake. Live in a bar. He recorded this in the back of his car. Pickup truck. I like the music. His voice sounds so strange all the time. This guy smokes like nine packs of cigarettes a day. No kidding. Brian Wilson is out, Reimagines Gershwin.
I actually have one of his, I have a Brian Wilson solo CD. Wow. It's all the Beach Boys. He's not good. He's not, I don't know that he should be doing Gershwin. I mean, he can do anything he wants, but. Oh, wow. Wow, wow, wow. Everything just sounds like the Beach Boys. Sounds like, yeah, and the Gershwin's, oh, Gershwin's songs are so good. Filter, The Trouble with Angels. Sounds like Barry Manilow. Kind of. Yeah. Kind of. That sounds more like the Beach Boys than Brian Wilson. This next one is my own special taste here. Oh, boy. I don't even know if I can say it. It's out. Brace yourself. It's out today. It's out today. Oh, I can see it. And there's children that will want to hear it. Dora the Explorer, we did it. It's featuring Shakira. Oh, even better.
Do not play that for your kid, dude. That's all you'll hear for next three months. Do you guys all know Dora? Who is that singing? Shakira. Oh, Shakira. I like Dora, the show. It's one of the best kids' shows. It is? They have a grown-up Dora now. They do? Yeah, she's like a teenager. Her name is Jennifer Lopez. Yeah. Okay, I'm going to say this one wrong. This is the one that everyone's like, you don't know this? Yeah, I didn't know this one either. I felt like... An idiot. I actually know this man. Ozomotly. See, I'm sorry. Ozomotly versus KC, K Crew. Soundclash. It's an EP. Wait, it hasn't kicked in yet. I bet. What's the big deal? I'm telling you, this is just an intro. This isn't their style. Yeah, Woods is pretending to smoke a marijuana cigarette. They are so good live, especially. Talk to Jesse about it this morning. Those are the albums. That's so high. Oh, my gosh. Out on DVD today, the last song with Miley Cyrus. Oh, boy. This sucks. Mikey, I'll pick one up for you and one for me. Furry Vengeance with Brendan Fraser and City of Your Final Destination. Definitely made a good movie ever.
Who? In the last year? Anybody? I don't know. I haven't seen anything except for Crazy Heart. I heard Inception was good. Every Tuesday I'm like, come on, give me something good. No. Inception. Crazy Heart. So I hear. And I want to see, I also want to see Iron Man 2. Haven't seen it. Yeah, me too. When's that? It's been out all summer. Oh, DVD, clown. Oh, oh, oh. I don't know. Expendables, I also heard, was good. The Expendables? Yeah, the Sylvester Stallone. You heard that's good? It was number one. Really? Yeah, I've heard from dudes that it's good. Oh, that's a surprise. I'll check it out then because I thought it was supposed to be bad. That's cool. Hey, details came out about the Craigslist killer's suicide. We'll tell you next. Number one pop song in the country, Tal Cruz Dynamite. Welcome back. Let's see. Oh, I want to remind you about Independence Jam. FM 94.9's Independence Jam. Coming on the 29th. It's going to be $30 Oceanside Pier and Edward Sharp, the Magnetic Zeros, Rogue Wave, the Wigs, Delta Spirit. And it's going to be a good time. So get your tickets to it right now and have fun. I wonder if Hoyle's going. I'm going. Yeah? You can blow it out?
Yeah, I got my boys coming in. Who? I got my friend. I have a feral friend from Australia. A feral friend? Yeah, he's never been on an airplane before. He's an aborigine. And I just added him on Facebook. You guys pen pals? Yeah, we're being pen pals. I actually handed him by putting a note in a bottle. And threw it into the ocean, and he responded to it. And so it's the first time we're going to meet face-to-face at Independence Jam. That's awesome. Wow, he's flying a long way for someone that's never flown before. Yeah, and they're putting him in a crate. It was cheaper to ship in cargo than it was to actually get him a seat in coach. Oh, wow. So it'll be you, your buddy, and your mama? Yeah, those are my boys. Mama's not a boy. That'll be fun. It's your posse. I'll see you out there. My feral friend's name is Hoomdiplak. So anyway. How'd you learn that? As long as that FedEx gets here on time, he'll be here tomorrow. FedEx. Yeah, I'm shipping him FedEx cargo. Oh. He's going to come out here and go to Independence Jam with me. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. The links you need to go to have a friend, Hoyle. Yeah.
Yeah, he has more friends than I do on Facebook, but that's because he's had the internet longer as an aborigine. Right. Right. Mama would let you get it. 17 friends on Facebook. She'll let me get it, but she wants to put parental controls on me. Yeah. You're 57 years old. I said, I'm 57. Mama, I'm not going to stand for that. She wanted to break me and my girlfriend up that I met on firstbase.com. What's her name again? I forget. This sounds like it's going pretty well. I guess we're broke up then. By the way, our video of the challenges that happened this morning, the saltines and the cinnamon. Woodsy put four saltines in his mouth and had to eat the saltines and try to whistle within 60 seconds. Couldn't do it. Couldn't do it, so we gave him the BB gun. In the gut. In the gut. We shot him in the gut with a BB gun. Jay made a little bullseye for my butt, and we shot me three times with it. And Sienna took a shot. I did. What this is called is highbrow. Yes, highbrow comedy. Highbrow comedy. Very sophisticated. Sophisticated. Almost British humor. Yeah, it's so smart. We had to go to a special school to learn these types of things. And now once we've learned them, apparently we can't stop. And Jay did a heaping.
a heaping teaspoon of cinnamon, and it shot out of his nose like dust. It was the size of an egg, like a hard-boiled egg. Maybe he does, like, cumin or something. Like, tarragon or something. Oh, my gosh. I think he's done. Mustard powder. I'd rather just eat a straight jalapeno. It's fresh. I could never do that. Maybe do that next. We'll do wasabi roulette. You would never do wasabi roulette. I've done it a thousand times. You've snorted it? Maybe not a thousand. What is wasabi roulette then? You have rice rolls. Oh please. All you're doing is eating wasabi? A huge gob of wasabi. I vomit. Some people have. It'd be pretty funny. I like egg roulette and nobody else likes it. You have to pop it all in your mouth. You just put wasabi in there. An entire gob of wasabi down the hatch. Oh, easy tough guy. Maybe you do that tomorrow then. Easy big time? It's not a big deal. Just do it tomorrow. So you pick a sushi and you don't know which one has the big block. Yeah, everyone does it. You go one, two, three. And then the sushi chef usually points and goes wasabi to the guy who got it. It would be me. It's a good time. And you guys would make it be me because you know I can't handle it. It would be hilarious.
I guess it just depends on how much wasabi. It's a gob of it. Bro, I can eat a pinhead worth of wasabi before I get all lit up. Really? Yeah, I can't eat a lot of it. Sorry, I'm not Latino or Asian. Well, check out the video today because it was funny. Hey, it's on our Facebook page right now. By the way, if you've never joined our Facebook page, it's a whole community of us M1s and M1 Nation sort of meets there and also on MikeyShow.com. But if you go to Facebook, you search The Mikey Show. You'll know which one is us. We have 9,285 fans or likes or whatever. So go there and you can watch the Mikey Show Cinnamon and Saltine BB Challenge. It's pretty good. Sounds like a band that's playing in Independence, Jim. Right, it does. Cinnamon and Saltine. I love their second record. M1 Dawn, are you there? Yes, sir. You wanted to tell everybody about Night for Gavin. Sir, thank you so much for having us. What is it? Well, this Friday night, we're having a fundraiser for some dear friends of ours who have a son named Gavin. Four years old. He's almost five. And he has a disease called Tay-Sachs disease. And it's always fatal. So, you know, but there is hope. There's research that's being done. And the problem is, is it's so rare that there's not enough funding for the research. So we're trying to raise funds for this family and to try to raise awareness for Tay-Sachs.
and I can just keep going if you want me to and tell you where it is and when it is and all that stuff. That's the most important thing. So where is it, when is it, and how? All right, it's this Friday night, I'm sorry, at Hensley's Flying Elephant Pub in Carlsbad. It starts at 6. We have a website called a nightsofhopeforgavin.com, and we're going to have live bands all night. We're going to have a live auction, two tickets to it. charger game, a trip to Hawaii, all kinds of good stuff. We're going to really make it fun for people who are there, but also at the same time, try to help this family. Yeah. Can you, can you put the link to your website up or get it to us and we can put it on the Mikey show page? Absolutely. I can get that right to you. Thank you, man. It's called a night of hope for Gavin.com and you can go online and, or you can buy tickets for $5 and you can buy as many tickets as you want. Very cool. Awesome, man. Good luck to you guys. Appreciate it. Thank you, man. Thank you for calling. All right. Have a great day. Thank you, you too. Quickly, we've got to give out the details. Some of the details came in about the Craigslist killer's suicide. Yes. He committed suicide in his jail cell in Massachusetts. Right. Well, we talked about this a little bit yesterday, but in case you didn't know, he did commit suicide on the anniversary of...
what would have been he and his fiance's wedding day, but they are no longer together. He's been in jail. And apparently he wrote his ex-fiance's name in blood on a wall, on one of the walls. Yeah, that he... I mean, this is pretty crazy, so warn yourself. Is it graphic? No, no. But it's what you would imagine of how you would have to kill yourself if you're in jail, you know. Hanging? He used a pen, shaved... Shaved it into a razor to slash arteries His ankles legs and neck covered his head with a plastic bag and put toilet paper down his throat so that he couldn't be resuscitated He then covered himself with a blanket so that you know when people were doing cell checks They wouldn't know what was going on under the blanket. So he was there for a while Until they noticed that his body hadn't moved Wow. Yeah, pretty nuts very very serious. Mm-hmm Well That is a crazy story. That's crazy, dude. What did I miss? Did I miss anything? Did I not get to something? Hill. Oh, the, say what? Hill. Oh, yeah. Yes, Hillary. Hi, Hillary. Hi, Hillary. How you doing? Hi, I'm good. I didn't feel like you were missing me. No, I was going to get to you. Yeah, I was lurking. In case he had said something that we were going to talk about. Right, right, right. Hillary, what do you got coming up?
I grabbed Muse and The National and Sleigh Bells, Prodigy, Dead Weather, some old chili peppers. Sweet. Yeah. Hillary is coming up next, and we will take a quick 20-hour break. We'll go home, take a nap, and then we'll come back in 20 hours. We'll do the whole thing over again. The Mikey Show is out.