The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 08/20/10

2:32when we got our live audience. We got a full house today. Oh yeah, we do. We sure do. And we got big news that's breaking and we got some pregnancy bellies that we're all going to be wearing. We got, well, we got a big show. We got a big show today. Plus, at 7.30 this morning, Woodsy is going to be doing the Mikey Show kook where we send him out to some kind of business close by. Seven. Seven o'clock? Is it seven? Yeah. Seven. he will go in and have a little bluetooth in his ear and uh and i will tell him what to say and he'll have to repeat after me while he's in the business it'll be awesome and you have to say it like you mean it i will say this i was a little nervous last week this week not so nervous yeah prepare to be amazed okay oh geez you're a dry cleaner this time yes dry cleaner i hope they're open

3:31They are. I checked this morning. Cool. You know that. All right. Today's word of the day is refrigerator. Oh. And it's going to be hard for me to not say that a lot. But the word of the day will be refrigerator, and it'll happen sometime between now and 10 o'clock when you hear the word refrigerator. Caller number 9 at 570-1949. Are you ready for this? We'll win. Meet and greet with the band Weezer. Wow. Big prize. So if you'd like to win a meet and greet with Weezer, then be listening for us to very cleverly work the word refrigerator into a sentence. Today is a very special day because today is Sienna's last day with us for her maternity leave. I already feel like I'm going to cry. No, no, don't do it. Don't do it yet. I know, I'm trying. I didn't even sleep last night. Really? I was like, oh.

4:26I was walking in this morning and I was thinking to myself, it's hard to believe that your baby is due one week from today. I know. Is the actual due date. Getting a little nervous, not going to lie. I was driving in this morning and I called my mom and it was about 6.15 in Dallas and I was telling her, I was like, well, today's Sienna's last day for a while. She's having a baby. My mom's like, woo! No, no, just tell her we love her so much. She's the best. My mom's met her once. Imagine how we feel. Well, it's a special occasion because of that, but it's also a special occasion because her dad's in the studio with us today, whose real name, by the way, is Keith Richards. I know. Unbelievable. Yeah. And he's got a killer voice. Yeah, he does. He was talking, and I was like, man, I know where Sienna gets it. Hello, Michael. I'm Keith Richards. Yeah. Pleasure to meet you. He's really cool. You're going to make him nervous. He is nervous. Thanks for having me in here. That's right. He's not like me with the outgoings. He's not? Oh, really?

5:28Is that your mom? I get that from my mom, totally. I mean, once you're out with my dad at a party, there's a lot of people around, he'll talk your ear off. Right. But, no. That's great. We'll shy at first. How many times in your life, Mr. Richards, have you heard... Dad! How many, Dad? Come on! Too many, especially with my little sisters, too. They're just like me. Dad, come on! I love it. Real quickly, five people on the show. Myself, Woodsy, Lauren O'Brien, Sienna, and Jay, and our phone screener, Krabs! Yes! He's here today. Okay, so... Yesterday, we were talking on the air, and we were talking about Sienna leaving for her maternity leave, and I said, yeah, if I had to be pregnant, I could probably do it, but not for nine months. And Lauren O'Brien said, you couldn't do it for a day. And I said, I think I could do it for a day. I believe what you said was, I think the whole pregnancy complaining thing is a bit. No, it's a bit. Did I say that? I didn't say it was a...

6:37Maybe it's a bit. Yeah, I didn't say it was a bit. I said, maybe it's a bit. Which is different than saying it's a bit. It's very different. It means that you think it, but you don't have the rocks to say it really loudly. So you go, maybe it's a bit. You're going to say it maybe and let other people dispute it. Yes, while you silently agree with one side. And so I said that, and Jay said, well, how about if I make pregnancy bellies for us? And I said, love you, Jay. Great. Great. What was I thinking? So we have them. Yep. And not only do we have them, but we also have maternity dresses. Yes. Woods is closing his eyes, shaking his head. We're going to all match today. Yeah, yeah. I have to wear a dress. Yeah. That's nothing out of the norm. Yeah. It would not be the first time. It wouldn't be the first time. You ready? To put them on. Yes. Are we right now? How heavy are these bellies? I'm going to have to leave the room. We have to do it the whole show long. How heavy? Like a bowling ball? That looks heavy. Give me the lightest one. I'm the littlest. It's heavy. Really? It's heavy. Really? So is a real baby, okay? How do we do it? Strap it on there, yeah. I'm watching.

7:55Jay put it on like a professional. Like he's done this before. Are you serious? You can go to the webcam, mikeyshow.com. I'll be back. Oh, wow. We'll have lots of pictures and stuff. Oh, that is not comfortable. Let me hold one of them. That's not comfortable. Oh, yeah, that's like a baby. Where's my skirt? This is what you have to walk around with? Yes. No. Try sleeping with one of those attached to you at all times. Imagine never escaping this. I know. No wonder they get crabby. Watch yourself. My maternity dress is really big. Weird. I think it's a boy. It's pretty low. Dude, that's past the beast. I know you guys are going to... You guys are going to find this really hard to believe, but this is the first time I've ever put a dress on. I don't believe it. This is identical to what I'm going to look like for 20 years. Oh, wow. I'm almost there right now. You guys, you look like me. Hey. Look. High five. Don't do that to me, but you do. Wow. Oh, sweet. I'm putting my dress on. Lauren left the room to go put hers on. Yeah, she'll be back. Oh, mine's weird. I look like a...

9:16Like a cracked out, you know. Really? Because that looks so good in mine. Mikey I think Mikey wins I actually know what Lauren's going to look like when she's pregnant. No, I'm not going to look like this. No, she won't. It'll be this big. I'm not going to look like this. This is like hanging down to my knees. Mine's pretty low too. I think you're all having boys. Mine's keeping my boys warm for sure. Wow. Oh my gosh, we did so many pictures. I will wear this for the first break. That's it. We got to wear it the whole show. I can't.

10:21You have to. Look at this thing. It sits right on your lap perfectly. Why does Woods just look normal? This is what I look like. No, you don't. We're going to have to have, like at some point during the show today, we'll be having a serious debate. And we'll look over and be like. You're wearing a dress. Like, I'll be trying to make a serious point, and you'll be like, really? You're wearing a dress, dude. Yours is all, mine's like lumpy and weird. Yours is perfectly around. What's in there? That's the weight. Sand? I don't know. Sand. Nice. They're heavy. Yeah, they are. Weird. Yeah. I think mine was made for like Paul Bunyan or something. I've had a knot in mine. Mine fits much better now. My baby's up high. There you go. Try a knot. That's a good idea. I feel like the crying game. It is. It is. I could not be happier right now looking at you guys with your bellies. I love it. It's so weird. I feel so weird. Oh, wow. Oh, man. I feel purple. It's so awful.

11:29We got so much to talk about. Wait till Woodsy tells you what's going on with Roger Clemens, if you haven't heard. That's going to be huge. That's a huge story today is Roger Clemens getting indicted. We'll tell you for what, what happened. I'm wearing a dress. I'm wearing a dress. I'm wearing a dress. I'm going to rest my elbows on my belt. It's a nice rest. You just fold your arms, set it right on top. Mine's going to make this crinkly noise all day. I had no idea that this is what it's like, Sienna. I have my legs spread open really wide. You can't cross your legs. How many centimeters are you? Oh, wow. Creepy. You don't even know what that means, Woods. You just like to say it. He just says it all the time. I think my water just broke. It's so weird. Okay, so big news today. The escapee from the Arizona prison. Was there only one left? He and his accomplice, his fiancée, they were both captured. They were arrested at a campground on the edge of Apache and Sitgreaves National Forest in Springerville, Arizona. Which is surprising to me because you would have thought they would have tried to...

12:40you know, get out of the state. Maybe they were trying to head down south. I don't know. Well, they were there. I mean, they've been missing since the end of July. So it's been a while. They've had plenty of time. And a park ranger noticed that there was an unattended campfire and saw that there was kind of like a suspicious car backed up into some trees, checked the license plate number, called it in, found out it was the stolen car from New Mexico because they were in New Mexico, murdered a couple over there. Yeah. And so then they took their car. took it back to this campground, and that's where they were found. A SWAT team came in, got them. Wow. And they've been taken in, yeah. The pictures that they're showing, because they're showing like the same couple of pictures. Yeah. And this dude is scary looking, man. Absolutely. He is scary looking. Yeah, he was serving a 15-year sentence for attempted second-degree murder and other charges. I always like to put myself in the place of, like... For example, the park ranger. Imagine him running that plate and what that felt like when it came back. Throw up, man. Throw up in your hands, you know? This one, this one, this one. Yeah, you're a park ranger. You're not, you know, Miami Vice, and you're walking in there like, oh yeah, this is him, this is him, this is him. Trying to... It's nearly impossible. I've got like a skin-covered strap coming out of my dress. I love you guys for doing this. You look gorgeous.

14:01Especially Mike with his beard and his dress. Wow. I look over at Woods and Woods is like, I just can't imagine what that would feel like to be a park ranger. And as I'm looking at him. He's got a purple belly billowing over. He's got a purple pregnancy belly coming over. I like Woods' dress. You may borrow that. Oh my goodness. Like Minnie Pearl. Like Minnie Pearl with a tag hanging on. This is fantastic. This is fantastic. Oh, my goodness. Don't you want to be pregnant for real now? No. Don't you guys feel like you're missing out on something? No. Never going to get to experience that. My neck hurts. My back hurts already. But seriously, the hardest part, one of the hardest parts is...

14:50Like, I can't sleep on my stomach, and I was always a stomach sleeper. So it's like, oh, I just lie there at night like, oh, it's so soon. I'm going to be able to lie on my stomach so soon. Mom, I want to sleep on my stomach. It will be a new bed. With a hole in it. All of a sudden, I was like, I feel self-conscious. I have this big belly. And I was like, oh my gosh, that's what every pregnant woman feels like. Yeah, it's not fun looking down. And, oh my. Goodness. I don't know what I'm going to do with this. We need so many pictures. Oh, my gosh. Is there a balloon in here? I don't know how he built it. I don't know, but he built it great. I mean, it works. It's a pregnancy belly. I feel like if I pull my chair and I'm going to pop. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Water to break. Yeah. If you were watching the news last night, you may have seen this, that they suspended the license of the racing company where the desert accident happened. The Bureau of Land Management just suspended all the event permits for the promoter of last weekend's off-road race. It was the California 200 where there were eight people that died, four from San Diego. And, yeah, they're going to remain until effect, the permits, until the investigation's done. Yeah, that's very sad news.

16:06You know, a lot of people affected here in San Diego because those dudes were from Escondido. It's really, really sad. What is the deal with the Park Booze Band? Where is Kate's... Kate Sessions? Yeah. It's North PB. You know where Mount Soledad is? I've been there. Yeah, it's on the side of Mount Soledad and the PB side. And a lot of people have been going there for drinking because you can't drink on the beach anymore. So there's a lot of youngsters that have been taking kegs out there. I mean, the slip and slides, full raging summer parties at Kate Sessions. I went to an adult birthday party there. Now, by that, I don't mean that it has lingerie. That's creepy. No, I don't mean that. I mean, it was a birthday party for a grown-up, a friend of mine that was a grown-up. Yep. There's lots of birthday parties there. I've been to a lot of little kid birthday parties there. And so for little kids, they can't really play there anymore. It's a playground because there's people drinking, neighbors are complaining. So about over 500 neighbors signed a petition asking that alcohol be completely banned from this park. So that's in the process right now. They're trying to do some restrictions like a 24-hour ban on weekends, maybe some rules like from 8 p.m. Friday through Monday at noon, there's no drinking. So they're going to try to figure something out.

17:21It's getting out of control over there. American Express was voted the best credit card for the fourth year in a row. And the thing about American Express to me is I go, well, if the whole concept is you use this credit card and then at the end of the month you have to pay it all off, what's the difference between that and just, if you're going to do that, why don't you just write a check? Why don't you just use your debit card? I think it's almost specifically to take advantage of the award. Rewards, yeah. Like you get miles and stuff like that. But you can get miles with like a Citibank visa without having to pay it. But then you're forced to pay it in full so you never have the balance that carries over and it forces you to pay it off instead of like carrying it and getting the interest compounded. Yeah, but like if you have, let's say you have $500 in the bank.

18:14And you use your debit card to spend the $500. Isn't that the same thing? But you get reward points for everything you spend with American Express. I would never qualify for American Express, so I never have to worry about it. Yeah, and I'll never be the American Express guy. Me neither. I mean, I don't pay stuff off in full. I just don't. Yeah, the thought of it scares me. Makes me sick. Yeah. And it's kind of borrowing against you. Like, I have it, and it's just kind of like advancing myself. You're responsible. You guys don't use credit cards ever? I'd use credit cards, but not the type that you have to pay the whole bill. Oh, that's scary. Yeah, yeah. That's American Express. Oh, I didn't even know that. Oh, yeah. Payful every month. You have to pay the whole thing off. Oh, that's terrifying. Yeah, right? It's a lot of pressure. Yeah, it's a lot of pressure. I have it there just in case. You have to be responsible if you're able to use an American Express. I don't think that irresponsible people have American Express. They don't qualify. How do you do it? You don't. You have it for a while, and then you don't have any more. My wife would be able to have one. Mine would not. My wife would be able to put $13.55 on it, if that's what she budgets. She's great with that stuff. It's good for companies, too. I think it mainly started as that, like a business card. Most of the corporate cards I've seen have been American Express corporate.

19:37Why was it voted the best? Do they say? Do they give reasons? Basically, it's like customer service, ease of navigation on their websites, and just overall satisfaction, really. American Express was number one, like you said, fourth year in a row. Based on a 1,000-point scale, they received a 769, which is 55 points higher than any of the other industry averages. Second was the Discover card. Third was U.S. Bank. And then some of the lower rankers was HSBC, City Cards, and Capital One. So there was news yesterday that I thought was going to be really crazy and sensational. And then it turned out to be a big deal, but not that big a deal. And it's the thing that happened at California Adventure. Now, if you don't know what California Adventure is, it's the area that they built onto Disneyland. And it's more fun, I think, for older. you know, if you're older, because there's scarier rides there, and, you know, they're more exhilarating. I've never been. Well, they have, like, the Pixar kind of stuff there, too. Like, the 3D type of things, and it's just way newer. Yeah, and it's, you know, at Disneyland, none of the rides at Disneyland, I don't think any of the rides at Disneyland are very scary. They're not, like, Splash Mountain scary.

20:56It is? I love it. Oh, my gosh. I think Space Mountain is scary. And Matterhorn, isn't that supposed to be scary? Well, the ones over at California Adventure, they're like real rocks. You guys, you're on Splash Mountain, and you're going up that really slow up to that very top, and it's like, ooh, that spooky music. And you see the bear hanging there. You're like, oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. It's kind of creepy. He's like, oh, oh, oh, oh. The whole thing creeps me out, by the way. How does he do it, Jess? Oh, wow. One more time. She gave you two times. She gave you two full times. I'm sweating. I know, it's hot. In your pregnancy thing? Now you understand why I always want the air conditioning on. If you have to breathe, just go. Well, anyway, yesterday we see this blurb on the TV that somebody fell 25 feet.

21:50from one of the rides. And I'm like, oh my gosh. We all thought this was crazy news. Yeah, well, some more details came out. And it was a 20-year-old man that was waiting in line at California Adventure for the Tower of Terror, which is like, I've never been on it, but it's an elevator that takes you up and drops you. So this guy was waiting on a second floor platform in line where he decided, oh, maybe it's a good idea that I climb over this barrier to the area below where he lost his balance and fell about 25 feet. They had to stop the ride. Madness began and paramedics treated him. He was taken to the hospital and he's been released. He's fine. Nothing too crazy happened. What a ride. That's the good news. I was waiting for it. Maybe you don't climb over the barrier. Maybe stand in line. Follow the rules. I remember thinking when I was in line, being like, wow, this is legit. If you fell, you go all the way up. My wife, that ride really... you know, psychologically impaired her. Why? She says she would never do that. Well, she's not the scary ride type. And what's really cool about this particular ride is it's exactly what I love. It's a free fall ride. Okay, so it takes you up 100 feet or whatever it is, and it dumps you. But instead of just dumping you, it works on a computer program. And so every time, it's different. It'll drop you 30 feet.

23:16and then it'll raise you up 12 feet, and then drop you 40 feet, and then raise you, and it's always different. If you have anything on your lap or at your feet, it'll just stand still in time. There's a ride like that at Six Flags called the Cliffhanger in Dallas, and it was always our bit when we were kids. You put a penny on your knee, and you do the straight fall, and the thing just goes right up to the top. It's the coolest. That's fantastic. The pictures that come at the end of this ride. It's the coolest. It'll be great. You're right. Everybody has the ugliest look in the world on their face. Yeah, for those of you in your cars, you couldn't see my face. Yeah, they should just call it the unflattering photo. So when you get off the ride, you walk up to the unflattering photo thing and you buy your picture. Would you like an unflattering photo? I would. Yeah, I'd like to look at it. Oh, yeah, that's really good and unflattering. Yeah, sure, I'll take that. Everyone has three chins. Yeah, yeah. Let's see how ugly I can become. Yeah. I looked... especially morbidly obese in those photos. It was great. I really enjoyed it. So if you haven't heard about Roger Clemens, Woodsy will tell you in Woods on Sports coming up next. A little special song for Keith Richards. We'll do that next. Don't go away. Going to be doing the Mikey show cooking a little bit. That's where we send Woodsy into a business with a Bluetooth in his ear. And then I tell him what to say and he has to repeat it. In case you didn't know.

25:24Me and Woodsy and Lauren and Jay are all wearing prosthetic pregnancy belts. And looking gorgeous. I just went into the bathroom. Had to do a one, number one. And I had to sit down. It wouldn't be any different. He heard me walk by and Mike's like, hey, Sienna, I'm sitting down right now. I don't know how you do this. And as I was sitting there. You have a lot of time to think. I thought to myself, what if a listener opened that door right now? It'd be the best image ever. It would make for great radio, pal. I was like, oh, wow. Oh, wow. This is a compromising position to be in. They're like, oh, oh, sorry, Mikey. Yeah, sorry about that. Guys, there's a tranny in your bathroom. Legs spread wide open because the belly's pushing down, you know? Yes. Oh, yeah, it's not fun. Look at Woods. It's already exhausted. Let me rub your back there. It's hot. My feet hurt. I have a craving. I want pickles. During the commercial break, you missed Lauren going, I don't think a girl should have to do this. I think only the guy should have to do this. I'm not the one that put it out there and said it was a bit. When she goes, Jay, Jay.

26:46A woman's hips are supposed to support this, not our neck. I go, you think Lauren complains? It hurts. Yeah. Yeah, it does. It's not fun. Back of my neck is raw already. 30 minutes we've been doing this. I know. I'm done. It's from the stupid strap. I'm like, how are we supposed to do that? Nine months, Sienna's been doing this. I know. Every waking moment, every sleeping moment, every moment. Every moment. It doesn't, you know, you go through the sickness at first, not the belly, and then once the belly comes, then it's like, Oh, my back. Oh, my feet. Oh, I'm swollen. I feel like I want to go home and go, I am so sorry. I am so sorry. I am so sorry. Your wife carried twins. She's a hero. She is a hero. Try mine on with that. And that's what your wife went through, probably. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. And your wife is a tiny little woman. Tiny. Oh, my gosh. Still think it's a bit? No. No, I don't. Definitely not a bit. It is not a bit. I want you guys to have to go like 24 hours. I won't make you, obviously. I think we've already learned our lesson. Yeah. I want you to try the sleeping. That's the worst part. It's impossible. Then I'm putting on top of that, I'm like, what if I had to barf right now? I feel like I'm going to barf right now. Because that's what they have to do, too. And then I'm like, and then what if I was like. And you don't have anything pushing on your bladder or kicking your ribs. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah.

28:08Weird, man. Weird. It's awful. The whole thing is just bizarre, what you have to go through. Let's see. Okay, so first of all, Jay saw Inception. Jay went and saw Inception. Excellent movie. Did you like it? Ugh, so many levels. Yeah, it's not an easy movie to understand. I'm almost glad I didn't read the book in this case. There is a book. Yeah, that's what I was saying. I don't think there is, because I don't think there is. That's the first thing I thought when I left the movie. I went, I think there's a book. I've got to get the book. I've got to get the book. But I don't think there is. I think that Christopher Nolan, the guy that directed it, he just wrote a screenplay, and that's it. Intense. It's really intense, and did you like it? Yes, it's like a roller coaster. That just keeps going, and you're just like, and you keep waiting and waiting and waiting, and you never can get off. It's like, please, just stop going for a moment. So, you know, it's that intense. I loved it. I definitely have questions at the end. I'm just like, what? It's one of those ones that leaves you hanging, and you have to figure it out on your own. You probably have to watch it again to get it. That's what Kim said. I said, I don't know if I can do that. I have to wait a while before I can see it again. Catch your breath. Catch my breath. I had to watch Memento twice. Same guy, right? The whole thing.

29:22That's a bit. I just felt a vein pop out in my neck. It's been oversold. That's why you're doing that to me. You're doing it to me. I'm not going to fall for this. I'm falling for it. Why are you doing that? Go see it. I'll never see that movie. Oversold bit. He'll see it, and then he won't tell you until it comes out by accident. Avatar, same thing, man. Oh, my gosh. Okay, that got me. He just compared it to Avatar. Same bit. It's not Avatar. Oversold. Yeah. Sienna wrote in her recap that she believes that her husband, Todd, may be more excited about getting DirecTV than he was about their wedding. I told him that like five different times, and he was like, no, no. I was like, what? Zip your lip, because we got some good stuff on the TV here. You should have seen it. I mean, for days, because the DirecTV guy came yesterday. For days, he's like, we're going to get DirecTV. We're making his own little songs. Wood said that he wrote you an email in excitement. Like, we're getting DirecTV. Oh, yeah. During the show, it said, we get DirecTV today, exclamation. Oh, my gosh. Not, hey, babe, we're about to have a child together. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life raising this beautiful child with you. So he comes home last night, and I'm sitting on the couch.

30:36and he walked in through our living room door, so I got to see his face. Oh, wow. I wasn't even in the room. He could have cared less to see me, and he looked right at the TV, and he's like, it's him! He's like, what should we name it? And then he went to all the other boxes in the house, and he's like, this one works, and this one works. Hey, I know the feeling. When I first got DirecTV, I felt the same way. It's pretty awesome. He's so excited. I mean, the main reason we got it is he can watch his Steelers, you know, because we're going to have a baby who won't be able to go out, really. And so he's like, oh, every football game, people are coming over. This is awesome. It's great. I remember being like, oh, look, an Archie cartoon on the Cartoon Network. I don't care. I'll watch you, Cartoon Network. I don't like cartoons. I'll watch you. I would be in trouble. Oh, yeah. There's a lot of stuff on that. You need to just start with regular old basic cable. You've got to crawl before you walk. That's why I don't have it, though. I know that I would just sit there and be like, ooh. For days, yeah. Shiny. There's so many new things. It's fun. Lauren took her computer to the Apple store yesterday. Yes, sir, I did. By the way, two different people, she says, two different women said to you yesterday, what? First woman, I went to my doctor yesterday. I walked in, I'm signing in, and as I'm looking down signing in, the first woman was like, how many months are you?

31:59That's the goofiest thing in the world. And I was like, how many months are you? And I was like, surely she's not talking to me. What does that even mean? And I looked up and she was rubbing her pregnant belly and looking at me with a smile. And I was like, I go, oh. I'm not pregnant. Oh, wow. She goes, oh, I was going to say you're not showing. I was like, oh, my gosh. What kind of doctor? I was at a female doctor. But there's plenty of other stuff that goes on there besides babies. For sure. But then five minutes later, I had to be like, oh, I got a new insurance card. So I go up to the counter. The girl that works there is like, so I know I put a note aside for some reason. She looks right at my belly. She's like, you're pregnant, right? And I'm like. No, and the other woman that worked there goes, that's the second person that asked you that. I'm like, I know. Maybe you'll get a little test or something. Maybe they can see something. Maybe there's an immaculate conception. Maybe we see if it turns pink or blue. Wow. Were you offended? She can't be, because she's...

32:59There's no belly whatsoever. Well, I was wearing like a baby doll shirt that is kind of flowy. So I was like, maybe. I don't know. No. I don't know. No. Maybe you just were extra smiley. I guess so. Why would you wear a tight tee? What you said wasn't weird. What was weird was your left eyebrow lifting up when you said it. That was weird. That makes my mouth water. So Lauren had a messed up computer, took it to the Apple store and You were thinking this is going to be hundreds of dollars. I was like, okay, prepare yourself. I'm like, 450. That's how much it's going to be. I always do that because I'm like, okay, that way hopefully it'll be less, you know. So I went in there and the guy's like, let me see here. And he like, you know, does this thing. And he's like, oh, here we go. And there was my sign in screen. And I was like, so how much is that? He's like, oh, you're all set. I was like, it's free. I was so excited. And I was like.

34:06I'm getting Apple everything from now on. Did you go to the doctor after Apple? Because maybe not to the smile. No, I went to the doctor first. But I did, I think I put in my recap, I had my stupid Blackberry that's like all cracked and old. And I saw everybody with their hip iPhones and fancy products. I felt like a nerd. What was the matter with your computer? It was just a flashing, when you turned it on, it was just a folder with a question mark in it that just flashed. And the guy fixed it? Yes. Wow. I tried everything under the sun for days. Oh, that's kind of cool. That's a good feeling. I had my endoscopy yesterday, and that was super. What did you eat when you could finally eat? I want to know. That's what Woods asked me. Mike was starving all day yesterday. He couldn't eat or drink anything. I told him not. He goes, oh, I'm so embarrassed. I go, well, then don't tell me. I want to hear it on the air. I'm sure I had cauliflower and broccoli stalks and probably a whole wheat turkey sandwich. Some raw almonds, maybe. Right. What did you eat, Mike? Where'd you drive through? What fast food did you go to? Carl's Jr. McDonald's. What'd you get? What'd you get?

35:22This is a big deal. Let me tell you what my normal order at McDonald's is. Okay. Hi, welcome to McDonald's. Can I take your order? Yeah, I'll take a regular cheeseburger with no ketchup. No ketchup? Nope, can't have ketchup. Sugars. The sugar. Can't have ketchup. Okay, that's weird, but okay, nice. Sally. And a small fry. Okay, little girl. Small fry. Okay, small fry next. Four-piece Chicken McNugget. Out of kid. All right. Oh, wow. Really? Yeah. Okay. It's a good addition. Which, by the way. Appetizer. Which, by the way. Appetizer. Is for me. In the car. Pigging out. In the car. Yeah. I mean, for me to get. Because this used to be my order. My order used to be the cheeseburger, the small fry, and a drink. Okay. Now my order progressed to a cheeseburger, small fry, and a four-piece Chicken McNugget. Because I'm up. pig, okay? No, you're not. A cheeseburger, a small fry, and a drink is a kid's meal. Nothing, pal. And the kid's meal comes with a treat. Bro, don't feel bad. Let me tell you how guilty I feel when I'm eating that four-piece, okay? When I'm dipping it in that sweet and sour sauce, I'm going, this is where it all started. Let me tell you. No, no, no. Let me tell you what I got yesterday. Oh, yes, it was different. A Big Mac.

36:46which I didn't disassemble. I ate the whole stinking thing. That a boy! You are hungry. Is there more? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, I knew, Lauren. Oh, my gosh. Don't shame him. Lauren, will you please turn around? I can't even look at you. I can't even look at you. I have to hold the paper up. Look at Woods and I. We both are smiling in jealousy. My mouth's watering. She's going to be disgusted by me. No, I'm not. You are, Lauren. You're going to be disgusted by me. I'm just curious. That's it. I just saw her left eye go, curious about what a pig is. It's just a twitch. I'm tired. An entire Big Mac. Cheeseburger, Big Mac. No, no, no. That's his normal order. I gave you my normal order, what I usually get. This is what I got yesterday. This is yesterday. This is what I got yesterday. Big Mac. So Big Mac is the beginning of the order. The beginning of the order. Oh, okay. I was thrown off, too. Big Mac. Big Mac ate the whole thing. 100%. medium fries. Yes. Step it up. Good job. Okay. Okay. And a six-piece chicken McNugget. That's my exact order. It is? That is my exact order every time. Oh, my God. What did you get to drink? Fat pig. A water. A bottle of water. Wow. Can I get a Diet Coke? Yeah, you know why? I got a water because I'm not a pig. No, you're healthy. Might as well go milkshake. I am impressed that you got a water.

38:10Because usually when I'm like, I'm just going to go like balls out and just get everything. I'm like, I break the rules. I get soda. I haven't cheated on that soda since I started it. That's awesome. I had a soda four months ago or whatever it was. You used to drink like a few sodas a day. I ate that and I was concerned that I wouldn't be able to eat all of it. I ate it down. Like a German shepherd drinking out of a toilet bowl. Okay, so you're driving, you drove through, right? Yeah. Or did you go in? Yeah, my wife had to drive me. So did you eat the- They won't let you drive home after the endoscopy because they give you, they put you out. Eat it in the car, pull over, or wait till you get home? Eat it in the car. The whole thing. In fact, here's what happened. Wow. Let me explain. Okay. We pulled, we went through the drive-thru, then my wife pulled over into a parking lot where she sets me up. That a girl. She opens up the Big Mac thing and pours the fries into the side. And then opens up the little dipping sauce. And I sit there like a four-year-old as we're driving. Wait, wait, wait. She set you up even though she was the one driving? She pulled over. She pulled over to a parking lot. FM 94.9. On your dial.

39:27And then she, and then, so we would drive, and I would bite, and I would dip, and I would eat, and diet. So happy. I mean, I heard you the first time. I'm just still wondering why she had to set you up. Because he was out of surgery, LLB. Is that why? Yeah. Well, yeah. Okay, okay. Is it, is it why? Because she loves you and takes care of you. She does, because I'm a child. You're a child. I'm a child. At times, yes. You were right. Okay. I'm a child. You see that little mark right there in my hand? You get a boo-boo? It's my boo-boo. I was such a Sally when they put the needle in my, for the IV. Write that down. I, let me tell you, they put a tube down my throat the size of a garden hose. I would do that awake before I would have them put that thing back in my hand. Oh, really? And I'd do it again on Tuesday. Sienna, I'm telling you, they sprayed this stuff in my throat. to numb the back of my throat. And it tasted like gasoline. It was so awful. I mean, it was terrible, right? I would take that for 45 minutes than have them put the five seconds of putting an IV in my hand. It's a little prick.

40:43Woods. Woods. Woods. Woods. Woods. Right when I said it, I was like, whoopsies. Woods. Woods. Woods, he just threw his hands up in the air. Like, what am I supposed to do with that? What am I supposed to do when she does it? You know what I mean. That's what a nurse tells a child. It's just going to be a little prick. Now he's hiding his face now. Why is your belly off? Because I have to do... Yeah, he's got to go do the kook. Oh, okay. I was about to get upset. All right. Well, let's do this really quickly. Let's do this. Because we got some good stuff today in sports. And we haven't talked about Clemens. Woods on Sports is brought to you by our friends at Clearview Eye and Laser Medical Center. Well, Roger Clemens has been indicted for perjury to Congress. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. So, if you guys don't remember, this is Roger Clemens in 2008. Cut one. I've been accused of something I'm not guilty of. Let me be clear. I have never taken steroids or HGH. Right. Here's the deal, man. You guys know I'm a Yankee fan, and Rocket was one of my favorites. I watched him win a World Series. I was in Yankee Stadium. He was pitching against the Braves. I was there. Really? I was at the game. It was game four. We swept the Braves, and I was there, and I watched Rocket go out and win.

42:19A signature World Series for the Yankees. And I was in the house. And this broke my heart. Broke my heart. Really? Yeah, for sure. So up until yesterday, when the indictment, did you believe that he didn't do it? No, man. No, I didn't. I've always... You've always... I've kind of, you know, after all this stuff came out, I mean, a lot of my heroes have gone down. So you're saying that when it came out that he... may have, you were certain that he did and it broke your heart. Well, that and all the other stuff that came along with Clemens, the affairs and things like that with Mindy McCready and all just the creepy, what a creep the guy really is. Broke my heart. Broke my heart. But he denies all the allegations. His attorney, Rusty Hardin, reminds us of something here. Cut to. The problem is nobody ever talks about what he should have done if he didn't do it. And he didn't do it. And he's adamant about that and always has been. I don't understand. Is that another way of saying how would someone act if they didn't do it? They would act like this? And he's also saying, hey, before we string him up, let's let the evidence come out. Now, Clemens is denying still that he didn't lie. He never took this or that. I feel bad for him a little bit because...

43:32If he did, which all signs point to yes, he's got a shovel, man, and he's digging, and he's digging, and he's digging, and the more you deny, the worse it gets. I don't like the bad rap that baseball gets when every other sport seems to skate by, and they do. Truly. I mean, you know, they don't do congressional hearings in the NFL. No, they don't. A lot of guys. A lot of guys on the Jews. A lot of guys. Why do you think that is? Do you think it's because of all the Homer records that have been set? I think that has something to do with it. And, you know, baseball records have always kind of been up here. You know, when I say 755 or 714, you know, 56 games, I mean, you know what those records are if you're a baseball fan. And, you know, if I ask you, Mike, Who's the all-time sack leader? I mean, you may or may not know. Right, rushing yards. I know it's Evan Smith, but, you know, it's just one of those things. Baseball records are held to kind of a higher standard. It's a bummer. It's tough to be a baseball fan these days. So it's just, you know, we'll see what happens in this deal. But on some good news in baseball, the Padres have swept the Cubs. They won five. Holy cow, man. They won five to three yesterday. It's their first four-game sweep of the Cubs ever at Wrigley Field.

44:43Their 10th win in 11 games, man. Unbelievable. You know what I think was really a boost for them? Was the thing that happened with the Giants. Oh, absolutely. I mean, they've been playing good baseball all year. They're playing great baseball now. The only downside, they had to put Tony Gwynn Jr. on the DL. He broke a bone in his hand. He's one of the best defensive center fielders out there. So that's going to hurt a little bit. But here's the thing about the Padres. They've got depth. And they've got guys that were injured that are coming back, like David Eckstein. I don't think these guys are going to miss a beat, man. Matt Latos yesterday was great. He won his 13th game. How did you do it, Matt? Cut three. The curveball was a lot sharper today. The only ones that got away from me were ones that my hands were a little dry and a little too much rosin. I felt it came out of my hand really well. I threw a good amount of them, and every one of them felt like I had the potential to throw a really good one today, and I think that helped right off the bat being able to throw that one for a strike. Talking about his curveball, and it's filthy. Also, some more good news for the San Diegans here that love the Chargers. There is no blackout this weekend. You will be able to watch this, Dave. No blackout. Everything is legit. 6 p.m. at Qualcomm Stadium against the Dallas Cowboys. How about that? How about them Cowboys? Oops. Sorry about you. Sorry about you. Didn't mean to do that. That's good. We're good. What's on sports? Oh, wow. Uh-oh.

46:08There it is. There we go. It's the pregnancy. You're all out of whack. Yeah, your hormones are all messed up. They're all wearing pregnant bellies. It's the best. Apparently there is a TV talk show host who is very popular. And he once asked Jennifer Aniston out on a date about 15 years ago, right? Well, she's got a new movie out, so she was doing press, and she was back in the show. Hadn't seen him since this happened. He didn't even know if she'd remember. Well, she remembered, and it was pretty uncomfortable when they started to discuss it because he remembers it differently than she remembers it. And so we will play that audio for you when we come back. And also, don't forget, Mikey Shoukouk. Woodsy just ran out of here. He's going to a dry cleaner, and he is going to wear a Bluetooth in his ear, and I will tell him what to say, and he'll have to repeat what I tell him to say. He's taking his dress in. Yeah, he's got to take his... He said to me, well, here was the deal. He was supposed to take jeans, but he forgot to bring the jeans. Sienna is just shaking her head right now. Of course he did. Of course he did. And so he said to me this morning,

47:23like we'd never discussed the jeans. He's like, you know, dude, uh, what could I take in there? You know, that would get me into like the comic because I need something. And I go, I heard this all go down. Oh yeah. Like he plays it off. Like, right. Like we'd never decided. He thought that you'd forget because you often do forget. Yeah. And I didn't. And I go fast one by you. I thought you were taking jeans. He goes, yeah, but I forgot him, though. So I go, just use your maternity dress. So that's what he's going to do. So you'll hear that next. It's not easy being pregnant. I love you guys for doing it. You guys look so good in your pregnancy bellies. You're just tuning in. Me and Woods and Lauren and Jay have pregnancy bellies on that are heavy. And we have on maternity dresses. Yes, they do. It's really pushing on my black. I know. I'm hot. I know why Sienna gets hot. Jay, I think he's loving it. Yeah. Like, I think he's smiling. He's glowing. I'm glowing. He's glowing. Jay, do you like it just a little bit? A little bit. Maybe a little bit. Maybe a little bit.

48:55The Mikey Show is me and Woods and Lauren and Sienna and Jay and Krause. It's Krause. Here's our phone screener. Let's see. So we're going to be talking to Woods here in just a second. There was an issue with the place being open. Are they open now, Woods? Oh, boy. Uh-oh. Breaking into the place or what? Are we on? Yeah, we're on. Yeah, I can go to... Burger King because they're on all of our engineers from the studio down here, and they said that this is their bit, is they won't open the doors right at 7. Really? Even though it says 7. And now, okay, hold on. Hi. Are you open? Hi. Loud. Good morning. How are you guys? Yeah, I'm thinking about it. I just want to ask you a few questions and see. You guys open at 7? Yeah, maybe. Maybe. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

50:00You want to do this now, Woods? Absolutely. Okay, well, wait a minute. Hang on. I got... Hey, hang on a second. No, no. Jay? Yes, sir. Do you have the new theme song for it? Yes, I do. Where is that? Might want to speed that up. Okay. He's just standing in there. That's it. That's all there is. It just says that, all right? Okay, let's do this. Woods, you ready? I'm ready. First thing I want you to say, he has to repeat everything I say. And by the way, whenever you hear me say weird laugh, that means that I want him to go, ha, ha, ha, ha. How's business lately? Yeah? You guys ever get any famous people in here? You ever get any celebrities come in? Any famous people? Completely ignoring me. No, you don't know? What about Edward Sharp? How about Edward Sharp? Five minutes? Okay. Can I visit with you, though? Sweetly? What is she... I don't... I don't speak Spanish. Okay. Excuse me. I'll come back in five minutes? Yeah, I really don't have the time. I'm kind of running out of town. It says you're open at 7. It says you guys are open at 7. 7? My name is Garrett Michaels. My name is Garrett Michaels. I'm a program director. Maybe you've heard of me. I'm a program director. I'm sure you've heard of me. Hi. Does Mikey work here, or does Mikey...

51:43Do you know Mikey? Mikey? Yeah. Oh, Mikey. Mikey? He's kind of a chubby guy who brings big old jeans in here all the time. Chubby guy who brings big jeans in. Yeah, you know him? I bet it gets warm in this place when it's humming. I bet it gets warm in this place in the summer. My house is so hot right now my wife found a zebra in the kitchen. My wife is so hot my wife found a zebra in our kitchen. Hey, you know where I can... You know where I can get some good dim sum soup around here? Oh, wow. Get back in here. That was fantastic. You did great. You want to do more? Is she going to come back? Okay. Yell. Just yell. What do you think of the Smashing Pumpkins new album? Do you guys like the new Smashing Pumpkins? You can't hear. She's not there. Corgan's kind of a nut, isn't he? Billy Corgan's kind of a lunatic, isn't he? That's nutty. Now, can you guys get stains out of anything?

52:48Do you guys get stains out of anything? I got some blood on a ski mask and I just... I got some blood on a ski mask. I need your help. I fell. I fell. I fell. Do you guys just ignore me? Oh my gosh. Holy cow. How can they just walk away? You know KFC has a new item on the menu. Have you guys got that new item at KFC? He's just taking liberties with it. Do I matter? Customers always ride? The worst service? What time is it? Maybe I take my dress somewhere else. So do you know Mikey? Yeah, he's a good dude. You know I got more attention when I had a pregnancy dress on. This is the pregnancy dress I was wearing earlier. Well, you know, I was thinking about it. No, no, no, no. Do I have a piece here? Did you look under that number? I'm just having fun listening to this.

53:53Yeah, that's Mikey. I'm not Mikey. I'm Wood. Yeah, Mikey's bigger. Mikey's bigger. Yeah, considerably. Yeah, considerably bigger. He used to be morbidly obese. He's not anymore. Yeah. So stupid. Yeah, that's fine. I can hang out. I really don't have anything to do. Yeah, right in the computer and all that. Hey, do you guys sell snacks? Do you have snacks here? Hi. I want to know what you ate for breakfast. Do you guys have snacks here? Do you have snacks? What about green tea? Do you have green tea? Uh, Ralph does. Sorry about that. Do you have green tea? Junior mints? Do you guys have junior mints? No. Shoot. All right. Do you have Lysol in an aerosol can? Do you guys have Lysol in, like, an aerosol can? No. You should get one.

54:53Okay. Thanks a lot, guys. Have a good one. Team Edward. Team Edward. That was great. That was great. See you in a minute. Oh, my gosh. Hilarious. Wow. That was the worst service I've ever heard in my life. I told him to get out. It was almost like... He went to his aunt's house. I know. Only his aunt would have been more attentive. Yeah. Like, don't you open at seven? Oh, my gosh. That guy has got rocks of steel. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. Ski mask line. Holy crap. Can you guys get blood out of a ski mask? I fell. I fell. I fell. Come back in five minutes. Oh, wow. Stupid. It's a dry cleaner. Oh, I love it. What are you going to do? That's a Mikey show kook, which I want to do every hour on the hour. There it is. Okay, so I said... My belly's getting in the way. I said that a talk show host, television talk show host, had asked Jennifer Aniston out on a date. She's making all kind of news today. Yeah. She got in trouble for something that she said, a word that she said that really offended a lot of people. So we'll give you that in a minute. But anyway,

56:19She went on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. And apparently, back about 15 years ago, Jon Stewart had asked her out on a date. And so he asked her if she remembers it. Here's what happened. You and I, you're not going to remember this. Yes. So you were just doing, when did Friends start? 95, 4. Okay. So you guys were maybe in your first year, second year. No, it was the first year. So a young ingenue. It was a show business. It was an ingenue. Didn't he just say it's a show business word? Really, really a big word. Does anyone know what ingenue is? It's like an upcoming star. Is there one person in this room that knows what ingenue is? Normally I would try to Google it. We've got a room full of people. Like, we have easily 15 to 20 people in this studio. No idea. I don't even know how to spell ingenue. That's why I was like, I'll Google it, but I have no idea. It's with an I. Familiar with it. Jennifer Aniston. I'm not it anymore. Comes on to, still ingenuousness.

57:18Oh, I know what it is. What is it, Lauren? It's a stock character in literature, film, and a role type in the theater. Generally a young, generally a girl or a young woman who is endearingly innocent. Oh, wow. He was right on the money. He wanted to break that word out. He did. I-N-G-E-N-U-E. He's been waiting for the right ingenue to walk in there. Wow. I don't know what that meant. You come on the program and you're adorable. Thank you. Even then, even you had a... You were 12, I think, at that time. He's nervous, by the way. He is. So nervous. And I asked you out. We went out to an Italian restaurant. Of course I remember that. And it was lovely. Yes. And here's what was nice about it that I remember, and you can tell me you remember. Yes. You brought so many of your friends. And I remember thinking, well, she's so excited to be on a date with me. She wants me to get to know her posse. Yeah. That's really sad. But let me tell you, if I remember correctly, and maybe I'm remembering it incorrectly, but wasn't it sort of like, hey, a group of us are going out. Do you want to join? Or was it like you want to go out? And I said, well, I'm going out. It's unclear, but it just shows my commitment to friends. By the way, as I was listening to this and previewing this clip this morning, I thought to myself, as a...

58:53host of a show myself he doesn't have an exit plan now this is what that means he knew he was going to ask this question but you have to have an exit plan okay regardless of how she answers it you have to have a smooth segue out of it and into something else and I just heard he didn't have an exit he didn't have an exit plan he's not sure where he's going he's not sure where he's going and now she's really throwing him off because she's like Yeah, I don't remember it the way you remember it. The way I remember it was, hey, a bunch of us are going out. Do you want to meet up? And he's like, oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh. Embarrassing, embarrassing, embarrassing. No, it was. In fact, I remember you just inviting random people at the restaurant to sit in between us. I don't remember if it was exactly a group of us are getting together. You're about to hear. Jennifer Aniston laugh in a way that will let you know that she's very uncomfortable. I just remember the box that I had written for you was, do you like me? Check this box. And then I did the thing with the numbers and I looked into it and I peeled it off. She's like, please stop. Yes, please, please, please. That was an awful night. You were a bad kisser. I want nothing to do with you.

1:00:11I get the feeling there may not have been any kissing. No way, there was not. It sounds like he was on. Now, I will say this, too. It sounds like he was a little worried asking her out. He was intimidated. I'm sure. I bet he got the hug with the tap at the end. Oh, yeah, for sure. Woods is back. That was great. That was awesome. So funny, Woods. You were great. That was fantastic. He just walked away. I was like, see ya. They walked all the way back. I'm like, hello. Oh, and their cash drawer, wide open. If I wanted to, I could have been like, oh, great. A little bonus for me. I like how you're like, I thought you guys opened at 7. Siete. Okay, so I saw. Three engineers from our station, Bill, RJ, and Jeremy, they're down having coffee outside, and they go, hey, you're not getting in there at 7. I go, yeah, I am. It says 7 on the door. He goes, yeah, dude, they don't open at 7. They open at maybe 7.30, maybe 8.10 some mornings. Really? Our engineer's bit is to sit down there and watch people come up and go, and then just get totally ignored. So Chris was like, hey, you got to let us in. We need in for one item, five minutes.

1:01:21Chris, way to go. Way to step up. Nice, buddy. It was a huge, huge ordeal. And then there were like three people in there staring at me like, please leave, please leave. Really? This was great. Other customers? No, no customers. Oh my gosh. Just the employees. Could you hear them? Yeah. Okay, good. Absolutely. That's what's great, man. That was funny. You can always hear them. Let's see. What do we have as a prize we could give away right now, Jay? Oh, I'm beating. By the way. Don't forget you're listening for the word of the day. Today's word of the day is refrigerators. So when you hear me cleverly work that into a phrase, into a sentence, just be caller number nine. At 570-1949. I have a pair of tickets to go see Spoon October 1st at Soma. Okay, so that's the prize for TomTom Tunes. Call us right now if you want to play TomTom Tunes. 570-1949. We have a TomTom device, okay? And we can actually communicate with the TomTom device. How are you, TomTom girl?

1:02:21I'm doing adequate, Mikey. That means good, but not bad. A little extra weight this morning, Mikey. You're feeling a little extra weight? Yeah. So is Lauren. So am I. So is Woods. And so is Jay. We've all got on pregnancy bellies, sympathy bellies, in honor of today being Sienna's last day before maternity leave. You guys look gorgeous. Oh, man. Can you think of some other words? But Gorgeous is not one of them. Mikey in a dress. Wow, what a sight. That's pretty awesome, isn't it? Let's see. So, yeah, give us a call if you want to play Tom Tom Tunes. And the prize is tickets to go see Spoon, did he say? Yes. Okay. Tom Tom Girl can talk, but not inflect. And so when you're trying to understand lyrics, you need kind of the melody of the song in order to figure it out. TomTom Girl, she can't do that. She's a machine. And so all she can do is give you the lyrics. That's all. You have to decipher for yourself what it is. That is it, Mikey. It's not easy. It's not easy at all. M1, Brian from PB, are you there? Yeah, Mikey, that's me. How you doing? Doing well. Thanks, yourself. Good, good. Are you ready to play TomTom 10s? Yeah, let's do this. Okay, cool. Here's what we're going to do. TomTom Girl is going to read some lyrics to you. Okay. And you're going to have approximately 30 seconds to try to give me either the...

1:03:44Title of the song or the artist that sings it. And if you can't, you lose. Are you ready? Yeah, let's do this. All right, here we go. I had a friend was a big baseball player back in high school. He could throw that speedball by you, make you look like a fool boy. Saw him the other night at this roadside bar. Are you there, Brian? No! That is incorrect, Brian. That is incorrect. That was a good guess, though, Brian. It was actually Bruce Springsteen's Glory Days. Glory Days, of course. That's right. Can I do something for you a little bit? Jersey? A little Jersey guy? Yep. If you want to play, 570-194-9. I picked these songs. Yeah. M1 Chemistry from San Clemente. Are you there? Not too much. Let's see if you do better with this chemistry.

1:04:51Tom Tom girl is going to read you the lyrics of some songs of a song, and I will give you this. It's very popular. Okay? All right. All right, here we go. It is close to midnight, and something evil is lurking in the dark. Under the moonlight, you see a sight that almost stops your heart. You try to scream, but terror takes the sound before you make it. You start to freeze. As horror looks your eye between the eyes, you are paralyzed. Because this is thriller, thriller night, and no one is going to save you. M1 Chemistry, 30 seconds is up. I need title or artist to win. That is correct, buddy. Very well done. You just won yourself some spoon tickets. Hang on the line. I don't know one human that didn't own this record. Not one human. My grandparents had this record. Sienna's too young. Did you have it, L.O.B.? My mom did. Your mom did? Mm-hmm. Oh, wow, that made me just feel really old. This is the one where the spread opens up and he's with a white tiger? Yep. That was the... What was the thought there, really? Just dichotomy. I'm a good-looking black guy, you know. I think what I'll do is I'll put on a nice suit and I'll lay down with a white tiger. White tiger. Why not?

1:06:32And I'll have that be the insert of my album. Welcome to the 80s, pal. It was a vinyl then, so I remember it opening up. I remember opening that up and going, wow. Yeah, like, wow, look at you with a white tiger. Yeah. He looks tough. How can you not with a white tiger? White tigers made Siegfried and Roy look tough. That's right. Did I just say Siegfried and Roy? Yeah, Siegfried and Roy. I think so. M1 Vanessa. That's right. That's if Roger Clemens were in Siegfried and Roy. M1 Vanessa from North County, you there? Yes, I am. Good morning. Good morning to you. You are our last contestant on TomTom Tunes. So you're going to hear the lyrics and you'll have 30 seconds to be able to try to tell us title or artist. Here we go. Sounds good. She has got a smile that it seems to me reminds me of childhood memories where everything was as fresh as the bright blue sky. Now and then when I see her face, she takes me away to that special place. And if I stared too long, I would probably break down and cry. Oh, sweet child of mine. Guns N' Roses, sweet child of mine. That is correct. I was getting nervous there for a minute. Very well done, Vanessa. Very well done. Thank you. Hang on the line, please. That's a real, real good one. I've been practicing this one acoustic. You have? Yes. It sounds good.

1:08:13It's all I've been practicing. It's driving my wife insane. She's like, hey, maybe play another song. Maybe practice something different. I can't wait to do this. Okay, so I love the show Hard Knocks. Hard Knocks is an HBO TV show documentary where they follow around a professional NFL football team for the preseason. And you get to watch. And, you know, it's really great because you get to see the real stuff. Well, this season they are covering the Jets. Okay? The Jets just acquired LT from the Chargers. They also acquired Antonio Cromartie from the Chargers. So, Antonio Cromartie, when we come back, you're going to hear a clip from the show where Antonio Cromartie struggles to list all of his kids. Next. Welcome back to the show. It's a Mikey show. Sienna, what's going on in news? Are you ready? Are you ready?

1:09:51Okay, let me give you a second. Yeah, I am. I was swallowing my food. I can't say swallowing my food. The guy is unbelievable. By the way, Woods off the air just said, I like to keep it classy. Yeah, I know. Do you? I like to keep it classy, Mark. Yesterday, there was a ribbon-cutting ceremony downtown for the new $20.9 million project called the, oh, where's the name? Quiet Zone. What they're doing is from Laurel Street to Park Boulevard, they are... Making it quiet for the residents of downtown. How? For years they've been complaining because of the noise of the train. The noise of the train that comes through. So they're installing medians, pedestrian curb ramps, roadway modifications, railroad interconnections, additional gates, fencing, and paving on the sidewalks. Wow. So that now when trains come in they don't need to do the horn or whatever. So it's going to be a lot quieter and the work is going to be...

1:10:51going on down there, and it should be complete in November of 2011. Also, salmonella is getting a little bit out of control with these eggs. State and local health departments in 10 states are investigating as many as 1,200 cases of salmonella that might be linked to the recall of 380 million eggs. Oh, wow. Yeah, these eggs are coming from Iowa, so be careful with the eggs right now. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, there's a little drama already at the Vikings camp. Percy Harvin, I don't know if you guys heard about this, but... dropped yesterday. He wasn't practicing. He suffers from migraine headaches. The guy passed out. They had to take him away in an ambulance. What a great career for a guy that suffers from migraine headaches. Going out and getting your bell rung every weekend. Also, there are rumors around the Vikings camp that Brett Favre does not like Brad Childress. That's what I heard. Did you see that? Basically, he thinks that Brad Childress knows nothing about offense and that he, Brett Favre, does. They're saying Brad Childress pretty much already lost this team. Really? Yeah. They're saying because, remember Adrian Peterson sat out for a while, he missed some mandatory workouts, and they got all up in arms about it. Well, freaking Brett Favre left him teetering on the ledge for two months, and they didn't do anything about it. So he's losing a lot of respect, I guess, with his players, and they said Brett Favre's probably his number one opponent in the locker room, which is just...

1:12:15How do you win like that? I know. It's going to make it real tough. Yep. So let's hear it, please, for Mediterranean Cafe. So good. Brought in some really good food. Delicious. If you love falafels and kebabs and that type of food. Hummus. Hummus. If you are a fan, you have got to check this place out because I have been feasting on it. So is everybody here in the studio. That makes my mouth water. It does. They are located at Washington and First in Mission Hills. And it's good. Food is really, really good. And it's catered to you. San Diego. They helped us out too. And they will do any of your catering stuff. And you can call them at 405-4959. And it's 858 area code 405-4959. Is your mic on? There you go. And by the way, this is really, really cool. Cater2U is going to donate 10% of the proceeds to Rady's Children's Hospital when you mention the Mikey show. So how awesome is that? That is so nice. So, so cool. And so thank you guys for bringing this in. The delicious food. The food is fantastic. Okay, so.

1:13:41Hard Knocks, great show. It's been on a few seasons now. Last season was the Cincinnati Bengals and this season it's the Jets. Well, as you know, Antonio Cromartie, number 31, he went over there from the Chargers and so did LT. And Antonio Cromartie was being featured in last night's episode. In this scene, Antonio... starts to name his children. Now, he's married now, but he's only got one child with the woman that he's married to now. But here he is talking to his kids. You have to turn, you know, all the aggression on. But as soon as you leave and get home, you got to be that father figure, you know, that husband. I got Alonzo, who is five. I have Karis, who is three. I have... My my junior which is three I have a my daughter who just turned three as of yesterday I have another son named Tyler That's all he turns three in December. We got another daughter that was born October 16th named London Another daughter was born named Leilani who's two years old and I have my newborn with my wife her name is Jersey

1:15:04I haven't had sex that many times. Oh my gosh. Maybe try a condom. They're all like two and three. Yeah, the guy had a big year about three years ago. Three and a half years ago, the guy was like, hey, who wants a taste of this? Well, Rebecca and I were watching that. Insane. Rebecca and I were watching that yesterday, and I go, maybe he's allergic to latex. Yeah. Seriously. What in the heck? Yeah, but the guy's got a couple kids. Yeah. And he's playing real good for the Jets. Well, you guys remember when they signed him, they had to give him money up front to pay some child support because he was about to go to jail. He owed $500,000 in child support. So when the Jets signed him, he's like, yeah, maybe you give me a little taste of that up front so I can get some bills paid. And they're like, so they did. And I mean, hey, man, the guys, I guess, stepped up a little bit. doing the right thing. Seven baby mamas. Yeah. I think he has eight kids with seven baby mamas. Well, most of them are three, so those are probably all different moms. Yeah, seven baby mamas. Unless there were some twins in there. I hope there were some twins in there because there's a lot of three-year-olds. His kids are all going to be 21 at once. Wow. He must spend so much money on child support.

1:16:25It's a chunk of what you make. Yeah. It's unbelievable to think about. I wonder if the other moms talk to each other. They're like, wait, how much did he give you? Yeah. You know, I want a piece of that. They garnish your wages, right? Well, that's the thing. I'm like... I think it's a chunk of, like, a percentage of what you actually make. And so if you have to do that seven different times or five different times or whatever. Well, they calculated what his bring home is going to be this year. It's going to be $9. Yeah, $9. He's going to bring home after everything is taken out. After tax is $9. And when they garnish his wages, he's going to make $9 this year. Yeah, it's going to be awesome. He better play some pretty good football. Get a couple packs of cigarettes. The more he makes, the more they take. Oh, man. More money, more problems. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Okay, so we have a surprise. First of all, we have a surprise for Sienna, okay? Jay, Jay, come on in. A surprise for me? We got a little surprise for you. Am I going to cry? I don't know. Yeah, he does. Everybody. I do. You know, don't you? You don't know? Nope. I thought you'd know. I just found out four days ago. Jay got a cake. Aww. To Sienna. And a male stripper. Yeah! Uh-oh.

1:17:40Jay's over in the corner doing something. With a pregnant belly up. With his prosthetic belly up. It says, we will miss you, Sienna. Oh, cute. It looks so good. We know mommy likes some chocolate. Thank you. Yes, mommy like. Yeah. So that's the deal. Thank you, guys. Sienna is going to be going on maternity leave. I can't grab it. Here, set it down. So this is her last day with us. uh before maternity leave um just to let listeners know as well uh next week we will be back on monday and then the following day i'm having surgery and so just want to let people know that uh what what's going to be going on with the mikey show and it won't be long by the way studio m is nearing completion and so studio m will be done very soon mikey show is going to be uh moving

1:18:35to a different suite on this floor that we're on. We're on the seventh floor. We're moving to a new suite, and it's going to be exclusively the Mikey Show suite. So it's office space, and it's a whole brand-new studio that they're building exclusively for the Mikey Show. And when Sienna comes back, and when I come back, we're going to be in this new studio. Now, for people that are wondering, we're not going to have anybody filling in for Sienna. You can't replace her. No, thanks, guys. I will be doing news and Woods and Lauren will be helping out with that. And Jay will be here and Krause. Let's Krause! And our new phone screener will. But Sienna has a surprise because Sienna is going to announce live on the radio right now. We have so many emotions running through my body right now. I know it. She hasn't told anybody what the name of the baby is going to be. Her eyes just filled up with water. Are you ready, Sienna? I didn't think I was going to. Oh, no. It's hard. I don't know why I'm crying. Because you're happy. I know, and I'm sad to leave you guys, too. I'm looking at the cake. I'm like, I'm not going anywhere. What are you guys talking about? Look at Woodsy's getting all teared up.

1:19:56It's my girl. Sorry, I'm such a crier. It's so bad. Me too. Okay, so the baby's due a week from today on Friday the 27th, so who knows? It's okay. It's okay. I can't even look at my dad. He's in here. I know. Her dad is here. Right behind her. Her dad's sitting right behind her. Okay. Oh, sorry. Holy cow. Look at the kid getting all teared up too. Okay. With a dress on. With a dress on. With a dress on. You guys are all wearing dresses. I love it. Okay. Thank you, Jay. Thank you, Jay. Okay. Pull it together. Baby's due next Friday on the 27th. And I announced before that it's a little girl. And sorry, Todd. I know another one because I already have a nine-year-old stepdaughter who's going to be a big sister. And that's just she's so excited and we're so excited. So I'm going to take the next week off and just try and relax and not wake up at three in the morning.

1:21:11And just get ready for her. There's more things I need to do. But I wanted to let everyone know the baby's name because everyone's been asking. And, man, it's kind of nerve-wracking because everyone has an opinion about a baby's name. If you have a bad opinion, you keep it to yourself. That's right. I will hunt you down and I will slit your throat. Yeah. And I'll be there to play in your blood. I love this name. I love it. It's so pretty. You guys better say that. I do. I love it. No, but the baby's name will be... Sage Aston Farrar. Yeah! Aston, yeah. Wow. That is an awesome name. Fancy. It's fancy. I love it. At first I was like, Sage, am I going to be thinking of seasoning all the time? And I don't know anyone named Sage. I've heard it once before. My daughter's name. Well, it's her middle name, yeah. Is it really? It's her middle name. Liberty's middle name. And Aston is my middle name. And in our family, it's kind of like a tradition to keep passing on middle names. And Sage is a color, like my name. And I don't know. Once it came in our mind, Todd and I were both like, oh, I love that name. And we racked our brains for a long time. It's like, how do you choose a child's name?

1:22:29And so, yeah, Sage Aston Farrar. That is so cool. Little baby girl. That is so cool. It's crazy that my name is going to be changing to mom. That's nuts to me. So, oh, yeah, we're just, it's nuts. I can't wait. As of right now, when you started introducing this, I was like, oh, I'll be back on Monday. Like, it's not a big deal. You know, and then all of a sudden it just hits you. It's very real. This is real. This is real. So real. Well, I mean, it's been. really cool watching her go through this process. I mean, we remember when Sienna was saying, man, I wish I would start showing pretty soon. I know. You know, we remember that. Oh, yeah. You know, we've gone through kind of the whole process with her and everything. You know, what a trooper. Oh, might want to turn that on. What a trooper. Just the way that she's handled herself. You know, I mean, I bitch and moan. more than anybody I know, and I'm not pregnant, and I have learned so much about what we do from Sienna. I know. And she's just a total pro, and I'm going to miss her to death because she's like a little sister to me already. I mean, eight months in, I love you, and I'm so happy for you. I'm so proud of you. Oh, thank you. I love all of you guys. I responded to a cool email that Woodsy wrote about listening to our first day on the radio together. I did it last night. Mm-hmm.

1:23:51And just how far we've come as a group. Because the biggest compliment that I think that we get is how we all sound like we've been on the air together for years. And I feel that. I feel like we've been on the air together for years. And, you know, I replied to the email and told Sienna, I just love so much about her. And I'm just going to miss her so much because. what you bring to this show and when I was leaving the old station and I think I told you this one time when I was leaving the old station I said you're gonna be my rock because I'm gonna look over and I'm gonna see you sitting there and I'm always gonna feel comfortable because I'm gonna see you sitting there and it's so true and so I was you know What I do is I like to, when there's something big and gigantic that's going to happen, I just ignore it and think it'll go away. And lately, it's been getting to the point where I'm like, well, I guess I've got to face the fact that she's going to go for maternity leave. And just sitting there in my office realizing what you do and how much you mean to me personally.

1:25:10Holy cow, you know, it was just really, we're going to miss you a lot. For a 25-year-old woman, she is, I mean, she's one of my voices of reason. I go to her, and she'll talk me down from the edge. You guys know. We all do. I may be a little on edge sometimes. Really? Maybe a little sensitive. Maybe I get a little fired up from time. But Sienna is the one that puts her hand on my back and is like, hey, you'll be all right. She brings us all back down. Yeah, back to life. Thank you, guys. It's going to be hard. For anybody that has ever felt like another human being, a husband or a wife or a boyfriend or a girlfriend or a child was a gift to you from God, I want to play you this. This is really, really cool. Not to get too mushy on you. God gave Sienna this gift, and it's really, really cool, and I'm happy for and want to play you this song. For those of you that have never been to MikeyShow.com, I invite you to go there now and check out our webcam feature where you can see all of us looking like we've been standing in front of a refrigerator for the last nine months. We are wearing our prosthetic bellies right now, aren't we? Sure you are. And they are also called sympathy bellies because they let us sympathize with what Sienna is going through.

1:30:11Sienna is due to have her baby next month. No, next week. And we are all wearing heavy bellies. Heavy bellies. Yeah. Looking real good, guys. Oh, yeah. Pressing down on the bladder real good. Keeping me warm. That's right. I'll wear this every day. Let's see. Oh, this is... You are about to be filthified. Yeah. You are about to get all filthy up in here. Nice. Wait until Sienna tells you where they've been discovering bedbugs. Not what I was thinking. Oh, no. Well, we were all sitting here getting ready for the show. We sent a little news flash across the TV. Bedbugs are now in movie theaters. Movie theaters. So that means you're just an innocent, sweet person walking in to go see Inception. And here come the little bugs crawling from the seats to your clothes. That's right. From your clothes to your house. From your house and your bed to all of your stuff. How do you like that? Oh, gosh. How do you like that? Maybe I don't leave the house. Yeah. I mean, if this... First of all, I said a while ago...

1:31:29Home theater is getting better and better and cheaper and cheaper. It's not as expensive to have a home theater system as it used to be. It's starting to make more sense for a variety of reasons. Number one, you don't get the guy opening up Kentucky Fried Chicken two rows in front of you. What? I don't see that. I've eaten a Subway in there before, but that's it. Everyone has. You don't have the cell phones going off. You don't have all the stuff that you've got to deal with. But now bedbugs. M1. M1 Sassine. Are you there? Wait a minute. M1 Sassine. M1 Sassine. Yeah, good morning. Good morning, Mikey, sir. What was the word of the day? Refrigerator. That is correct. You missed it again, Mike? I miss it every day. You didn't notice? I don't pay attention to you. Yeah, no, that's true. That is true. It was a refrigerator. Active listener. Yes. Refrigerator was the word of the day. Yeah. Good job. You heard it, and you were caller number nine, and you just won yourself a meet and greet with Weezer. That sounds amazing. How about that? Say it ain't so. It is so. Lucky. It is so. Don't come undone, man. Hang on the line, bro. Don't forget your hash pipe. Wow, Woodsy. Wow. She loves it. So, are you guys ready for a brand new episode of Urban Survivor?

1:32:50Oh, yes. As you know, it's Mikey Grylls, and he's got a new episode. I'm Mikey Grylls. I've never been a member of the British Special Forces. I barely got out of high school with a GED, and I've got no experience except for telling jokes on the radio. I will try to survive in urban situations using nothing but the company's credit card, a car, a nice one at that, my wallet, and whatever things I can find on the internet. You're listening. to urban survival. I'm stranded in Chula Vista right now, in a sweltering heatstorm. I can't be certain, but if I had to guess, I'd say it's at least 81 to 83 degrees Fahrenheit. My shirt is sticking to my body, and I can detect the faint odour of perspiration, which is not good. If this ever happens to you, don't panic. Panicking can make a scene or kill you. Here, this looks like a good place. It's deserted. There are racks of what appear to be DVDs or CDs on the walls, and they're scattered throughout. Part of survival is scavenging. I could use the casing for driving Miss Daisy as a makeshift ashtray if need be. I'm not too familiar with this place, but there seems to be an employee here. She's doing a crossword puzzle and trying to stay awake.

1:34:20So I'll approach her, but with caution. Excuse me, miss. Yes. Can you tell me where I am? Sir, you're in a blockbuster video, sir. I've never heard of it, but that's not important. Why is there no one in this building? Uh, Alicia. It's Alicia, sir. But it's spelled A-L-E-C. Ah. Great. Well, it's Alicia, so... Anyway, the reason there's no one's here, because there's things like Netflix, On Demand, iTunes, Hulu... Yes, that's right. Netflix. I love Netflix. In fact, I've got Happy Gilmore in my queue. I'm going to browse around. There's barely enough to entertain me here. I'm going to have to ration these films to make them last. My only genres include...

1:35:23Comedy, family, drama, action-adventure, romantic comedy, music performance video, documentary, video games. Look at this one. Oh, yes. This is Encino Man, a classic. The choice has been made. I'll now attempt to purchase this. However, I'm famished. I've decided on popcorn. Oh, my God, yes. Oh, my God. Oh, this is delicious. I can tell. i am regaining my strength my tip of the day sometimes it is okay to eat yellow snow but only if it's a snow cone stand and it's favored like coconut or vanilla until next time i'm mikey grills there is nothing better than english

1:36:24People pronouncing words differently. I don't know why. I love it so much. I love it. Chuler Vister. Chuler Vister. I killed it. And that's one of Woods' favorite pieces of, that's his right up his alley comedy wise. Because the other day we were talking about, somebody mentioned who's the boss. And I go, Angela. And I thought Woods. Angela. Angela. Oh my gosh. Kills me. It reminds me so much of being, you were a little kid with. Who's the boss? Yeah, I mean, I was young, but first crush. Sam Buscelli. Alyssa Milano. Didn't know what it was, but I knew I wanted it. Oh, yeah. I was thinking about back to school and going back to school and how all the kids are starting to go back to school now, which is weird. Because where was the summer? Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm sure a lot of kids want a refund on that. The summer was yesterday and the day before. I know. Well, hopefully we get a late summer and it won't be crowded for us adults. I know, but they'll be in school so bummed. My wife yesterday, we went to the beach and she goes, I'll be glad when all these tourists leave. That's so awesome. With a southern accent, she said that, by the way. I'll be glad when all these tourists leave. It's the best.

1:37:41But I was thinking about back-to-school stuff, and I was going, that for me, in fact, I had to go to Office Depot the other day. Weird. And just the smell of Office Depot made me anxious because it reminded me of being a kid. And you guys were talking about how for you guys, going back to school was a great time. For me, it was anxiety. I loved the back-to-school shopping. The best. New backpack. Like, the backpack said everything about you, by the way. Yeah. You had to get a really cool backpack, and your shoes. Shoes had to be legit. I wore a uniform, so shoes were really important. You did? Really? Oh, wow. See, Woodsy said the same thing you said, Sienna, that the backpack was a big player. Huge. When I was going to school, a backpack was not the big deal. It was all about shoes, which were, at the time, vans were the big deal. And, you know, which I would wear, like, sans. Wans. Wans. It would be a W in the shape of, like, the V from Vans, but it was Wans. And I just remember going to Mervyn's and just so badly wanting to go to, what was the cool place? Members Only was a big one. Members Only? They had a store? Yeah, they did. Wow. Their own store.

1:39:02Back in 1984. I did not know that. And there was no way I was getting any of that stuff. So it was Mervyn. This is what I remember. Mervyn's Penny Sears. The big players. Oh, yeah. My dad would take us to Ross Burlington Coat Factory. TJ Maxx. The weakest bits you could ever imagine. Montgomery Wards. My mom would step up a little bit, but dad, not so much. Sienna's being very quiet during all this part because, yeah, she's like, really? You guys didn't have, like, the designer names? We went to Rodeo. You didn't take a limo to Nordstrom? I'm talking to you guys. That's awesome. I just remember the anxiety, though, man. And I was never a good student, which was the other thing. So, like, we would go and we would get the school supplies. I didn't even know what to get. Maybe that's why I'm so into pens. See, we had a list. Our teachers would send a list. Oh, and they were long lists. I never got a list. Really? No. Like, what kind of stuff? Reinforcers, 24 packs of multicolored crayons, protractor.

1:40:07Oh, my gosh. Compass. How great would it have been, and this is what you guys experienced, but I'm thinking to myself, how great would it have been that my parents would have to get something? Yeah, we had to. And the other thing that was cool, I don't know if you guys did it or not, our local paper, it would announce who was in your class. Really? So you would be like, oh, my gosh. Our list was in the newspaper. That's awesome. But I remember 8th grade going into 9th grade calling all my buddies like, all right. You got your schedule? Let's do it. And we'd see which classes we were in together. And it was like, yes, three classes. Really? Yeah, that was the best. And they're like, oh, Randy's in that class, too. And you're like, oh, my God, no way. When do you have lunch? When do you have lunch? That was high school. When do you have lunch? When do you have lunch? Because there was lunch times at different times. We had. 4th through 6th period. So 4th, 5th, 6th, you could have lunch. Lunch started as early as like 10.30 in the morning or something. Here, I think everyone has lunch together in San Diego. Yeah, I've never even heard of that. Depends on the size of the school. Really? Big old school. We had a big school too. Yeah, that's true. Big, giant school. As ridiculous as this sounds, one of the things I miss about high school more than anything was that if I had a really horrific zit, that was a big deal in my life. Oh, yeah. You miss it? You miss it?

1:41:20Having that be a big deal in my life. Holy cow. I think about stuff now that's a big deal in my life. I'm like, oh my gosh. And you can't explain that to a kid. If somebody would have said to me then, you know. Well, one day, this and this and this, I'd be like... Shut up, old man. Really? You don't know. You don't know what it's like to have a zit. This is the last time you had a zit. You don't have homework. You get to go to work. Right, yeah. You make money, man. Yeah, you make money. You get to do whatever you want. Stay up as late as you want. You never have to do homework, ever. You don't have a curfew, man. I look like Rudolph. Yeah, if you want to, you come home at 3 a.m. Yeah. But you have to bed at 8. Yes. I'd be like, hey, high school Fat Mike, guess what, buddy? I go to bed at 6 p.m., all right? Exactly. And high school Fat Mike would be like, I'm going to let you stay out. It's because you choose to, man. Yeah, you choose to.

1:42:24I miss going to Staples with those long lists, though, and you're like, okay, where's the coolest folder? Which color? No, I don't want that one that has a cat on it. That matters. I had to buy a folder the other day, and the color, I really spent time. Oh, yeah, it's a big deal. I'm 40. You guys remember Trapper Keepers? Oh, yeah. I remember trying to get the folder that matched the Trapper Keeper. I mean, like, where is this one? I've actually looked on... They don't make them anymore. They were I just what it reminds me of it was like a zip up binder binder All these little pockets pockets it's had a little bag for your pens and stuff It just looked so 80s, though. Okay, what year were you born, Sienna? 85. Did you? Oh, wow, as a sophomore. I know, sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Sienna, when you were in high school, did they have peachy folders? In high school, yeah, I mean, I think so. I didn't ever buy school supplies for high school, though. I didn't even have a backpack. I just carried a purse. Really? Pictures online. Yeah. Trapper keepers. Don't do it justice. Peachy folder? Peachy folder. What the hell is a peachy folder? It's just a regular folder, right? Peachy? Are you saying peachy?

1:43:41Peachy. Peachy? You didn't have that either? I remember peachy folders being on the list, though. Lauren, you didn't have peachy folders? Was it peach colored? No. No, it's like P-E-E-C-H. Let me go to the old man on the show. Jay? No. No peachy folders? No. I know what you're talking about. It must be a California thing. Let me tell you. Jay, did you have to buy an abacus before? We just had big stone tablets that we carved everything into. Oh, I got it. Here's an image. Of a peachy folder? I remember them. I do not. Never. Yeah, that's all I used. Really? And the whole deal with the peachy folder was that you vandalized it. Oh, yeah. So your friends would draw stuff on there. I used to draw, remember the notebooks that were like, they were blue in color, like kind of a light blue. Like cloth colored. If you rubbed your fingers up. Yeah, it was like denim. Yeah. And I used to draw Kiss and Led Zeppelin on mine. With an eraser. Yeah. No, with a black pen. Etch it in with your pen. Etch it in and Led Zeppelin and all kinds of stupid stuff. We were dumb. Yeah, and you'd have your friends just like, I mean, it was cool. You couldn't just have a folder that didn't say anything. You'd have to write on it, and your friends would like sign it. Got another one for you. My friends signed my backpacks. We got one for you too. Do you remember, now girls, yeah, you probably had this, but if there was a girl, Woods, that you dug in high school, you planned what you were going to write in her yearbook.

1:45:04100%. Really? Oh, yeah, and it would be like... You had to word it. You would word it perfectly. You had to word it perfect. Maybe even practice once. Yeah. Oh, the handwriting? The handwriting. Make it look good? Yeah. KIT real good? Yeah. Keep in touch? Keep in touch. See you at the pool. Have a cool summer. See you at the pool. Have a cool summer, yeah. Have a cool summer. Hey, if you want to hang out or something, just let me know. Yes. Here's my number. If you put your number in the yearbook, it was a big deal. It was. It was a big deal. Freaking yearbooks. Do you remember covering books? Oh. The worst. What is that? Book covers. Using like a paper bag. Yeah. Oh, yeah. The worst. They handed them out at the beginning of the year. They're like, everybody got a book cover from some local business. Fold, fold, fold. I was good at it. Put your book in the middle. My worry.

1:45:49Terrible. And then by like the second week, the corners were all ripped. You didn't cover your books? Yeah, I did. I covered them with paper bags and then I had to write my name on it like Duff Leppard's print. Exactly. We used to get checks. I had to do it just exactly like the font on the Duff Leppard albums was. I had to write Mike with the font like Duff Leppard. Do you remember the Van Halen? The VH? I had that on all my stuff. Everything. I did, remember Stussy? Oh, yeah. I did this Stussy S for my name for like three years. What does it look like? Can you still draw it? I can draw it blindfolded, yes. Let me see. Let me see. I had a Stussy hat. Yeah, but you had a Malcolm X hat, too. Yeah. Just a moment of silence for Woods' Malcolm X hat. Black man struggled, dude. Oh, yeah. I remember that. I remember that. Social studies, and you'd have the double S. I call that the Suzuki S. 570-1949. M1 Mitch from Encinitas. Are you there, Mitch? I'm here. Go ahead. Hey, I just wanted to let Tiana know that I saw Trapper Keepers at Costco in Carlsbad the other day. Wow. I actually saw office supplies for a living, so I was walking by and I was like, Trapper Keepers! They are awesome. What was the allure of the Trapper Keeper? What was the draw? Functionality. Look at this. It had a cool design, too. And it was like the iPad of the day, Mike. Oh, I do remember that. Remember? And it would flip open? Yes.

1:47:14Yes, I mean the reason I would want one now is because they just remind me of my childhood I want like an old-school Zach Morris. I'm gonna get some I'm gonna get some yeah Well, you get one with a palm tree for me. I will try to find one. Thank you Is that what you used to have palm tree did you do that like all the time? No, I wasn't you had to get a new one every year You brought one back with like pen stains on it be like would you get that last year? Did you get and it always had to be a different design kind of thing? Yeah, oh, my belly hit the volume. We're all wearing pregnancy bellies. So you would have a palm tree one year, then the next year you'd get something different. Like a panda. They were so cool. I remember being in high school, too, and seeing dudes carrying stuff that I'd be like, I wouldn't be caught dead with that. Clown. Clown. Weirdo. Yeah, and they were probably like, that is the ugliest blah, blah, blah. Do you remember starter jackets? Yeah, what is it? There's like the satin team Star in the logo. Yeah, I really like I was on a team It wasn't about being on a team professional eater Yankee fan, so I had the Yankees Yankees started every day my favorite back-to-school item ever Was a pair of high top red leather Reeboks really they were so when my foot grew out of them I was that was like the saddest day ever

1:48:38Pumps. I had pumps. I bought Reebok pumps. Oh, yeah, with the little ball. Pump them up real good. Pump it up. I don't know that I would. How would you have been with a girl wearing red high top? Funnily enough. That was the style in Connecticut where I lived. And I know exactly which ones you're talking about. They weren't like basketball shoes. That's what I just pictured. They were like aerobics shoes. They were like aerobic shoes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Did they have puffy? Yes, exactly. They were red, white. One of the girls I dated, Megan Vendetti, had green ones. I was like, oh, you're the best. My red ones were. I got compliments every single day. That was so cool. What were the nicknames that people, would anybody ever mess with your name and Lauren? No, it didn't really rhyme with anything. I was Woodsy, always. Yeah, they didn't do Woodsy and rhyme it with something like Woods the Hoods or something. No, it was always Woods. Steve the Beave. Yeah, Michael Michael Motorcycle. I was Queen Isabella. Hey, Queen Isabella. Sienna, did you get anything?

1:49:41Red in the head, crazy. Well, my last name was Richards. So Richard, the short word for Richard. They would say that like they were clever. Like a boy's body part. But your dad is sitting right behind you. I can read your mind, pal. I can read your mind. Jennifer Aniston, we talked about it earlier, but she made a lot of news yesterday. And we got stuff on that. I don't know if you know this, but apparently... She used to go to a spa that was bilking celebrities out of money using their credit cards. So we'll tell you all about it coming up. It's the Mikey Show. Welcome back. Sienna, what's going on in the news? Well, Disneyland is a little bit... in trouble right now. A Muslim employee, 26-year-old woman, is suing them because they would not allow her to wear a head covering while working at a hostess at the Grand California Hotel. Really? Yes. I have a feeling we're going to be hearing a lot more about this. It's a pretty big story. Also, in case you didn't hear, the last Arizona escapee was caught yesterday and the alleged accomplice, his fiance, who helped break the three prisoners out. So all of them have been caught. This last one was caught by a park ranger who noticed them at a

1:51:33National Forest in Arizona, where the prison was, so they didn't get too far. Mm-hmm. Scary. Yeah. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, the Padres have completed their four-game sweep of the Cubs. They've won 10 of 11. They are heading to Milwaukee, Michael, to take on the Brewers. Wade LeBlanc against Giovanni Gallardo tonight at 510. And if you didn't hear earlier, you will see some Charger football this weekend. The blackout has been lifted. They will be taking on the Dallas Cowboys. There you go. So Jennifer Aniston's doing a bunch of promotion for her new movie that's coming out. And while she's been doing that, she's been talking about all kinds of stuff. One of the things she talked about was apparently there was a spa that she used to go to that was bilking celebrities by using their credit cards.

1:52:30I want to get to the movie, but first this crazy story that came up out of Hollywood yesterday, Shea Gabriella, this woman scamming all kinds of celebrities, and you were one of them, but you didn't even know about it, right? Well, I sort of got out of that world about five years ago, because some stuff was not kind of... Well, I don't. She's comfortable talking about it? Yeah, no, not at all. I want to say that she wasn't to the extent that these other girls have had. But you had a sense something wrong was going on. Yeah, well, we had a situation that was not cool. So I sort of just stopped going to her, paid the money and left. But I knew that something like this. It's real easy. She just stopped going to this place. That's all she had to say. But I wonder if she was like. Something weird is going on here. That's what she thought. But aside from the credit card, like if there was, she found like a peephole. Oh, like more shenanigans? Yeah. Sounds like there was maybe something else too. Yeah, it wasn't cool. In addition to the credit card stuff? Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Well, whatever it is, she didn't like talking about it. But eventually it happened because, you know, there's no way you can get away with that. No, you can't. You thought you had stopped paying the money, but it turns out that you and a lot of other people didn't. They're going to get to the bottom of it now.

1:53:43She built a bunch of people, like I said, other celebrities. Who else? Anne Hathaway, Cher, Melanie Griffith. Yeah, there's a bunch of people. Cameron Diaz, I think. I didn't see Cameron Diaz. Liv Tyler. One of them she built for like $250,000 over a couple months. Liv Tyler, $214,000 in five-month period. How crazy is that? Yeah, a lot of money. They say if she gets convicted, it's like 25 years in prison. Yeah, she's being charged with two counts of fraud and faces a maximum of 25 years. Yeah, it doesn't happen to him. Yeah, exactly. Booker. Let's see. Would you guys like to play movie plot Hot Potato? Would you like to? Would you like to? Would you like to, Michael? Yes. In your little dress? I'm just nervous because I'm... Not that great at it, but I'm pivotal to the game. You sell yourself short. No pun intended. You're really good. All right, let's try it. You're really smart and good. Tell yourself that you're good. All right, 570-1949. Woods. Hi. I'm going to have you, because my brain's tired. Okay. Explain to people how a movie plot hot potato works. It's really easy. I have a...

1:55:00literal hot potato in my hand right now. And what I have to do is describe the plot of a movie to our little cubs over there. Me. Mikey. And once he guesses the movie, I throw the hot potato to my boy Jay, who then has to do the same. An unnecessary step, by the way. Right, absolutely. He just likes to throw it. But fun. Then Jay does the exact same thing. Now, there's, I think, what, how long on the clock? 60 seconds? 60 seconds. Whoever's left holding the hot potato. When the clock runs out. When the clock runs out. It's very simple. Yeah. So what you're going to do is you're going to pick a horse. You're either going to pick Jay or Woods to win. Our prize is a four-pack of tickets to see Weezer, including a meet-and-greet for this set. Unbelievable. Nice. We're rolling big. 570-1949 is our number. I'm jealous. Give us a call. Tonight's 8 o'clock album here at FM 94.9, ZZ Top Fandango. Huge. How great is that? Turns out, by the way. They did an endoscopy where they stuck a camera down my throat. Nothing wrong with my insides. Good, dude. So now they want me to see an ear, nose, and throat doctor for why my voice gets scratchy. You know what I think it is? Talking? I think it's a hernia. Oh, maybe. Which I'm getting repaired next week. So I think once that's fixed, my voice comes back to normal. All right. You know these movies. I'm telling you. I need you to mind meld is what I need you to do. Look at me in the eye. Right? Look at me in the eye. Okay.

1:56:23I got it. I know what it is. I got him. I just did it right there. I figured it out. That was intense. M1 Public in Sorrento Valley. Who would you like to pick? You got it. Hang on the line. You'll be sorry. M1 Dane. You've got Jay. You're from Oceanside. Hang on the line, okay? Yeah. Yeah. Hang on, Dane. That kind of guy. Didn't Jay win last time? Yeah. Somebody froze. Yeah, we got one thing out. I knew the movie, but I couldn't think of the name of it. So hopefully that doesn't happen this time. We actually have a real game this time. Are you ready? Yes. We got 60 seconds, and Woods always starts. Here we go. I see dead people. Sixth Sense. It's a big ship that, unsinkable. Titanic. Bowler with a hook. Didn't we do this one? Kingpin. Okay. Yeah, I couldn't get it last time. This is an ogre, and he has a donkey as a friend, and they travel. I know that movie. What is it? It's the one with Fiona.

1:57:24Yep. Shrek. Ah, on your face. Vincent Vega. Jules. Pulp Fiction. Johnny Depp. Pirates of the Caribbean. Yes, thank you. Your most hated movie, Michael Cera. Oh. Mikey! This is going to get him. Youth in Revolt. Yep. This is, he shoots web out of his arms. Spider-Man. Yeah. Doc Holliday. Tombstone. These Cars. They changed into something else, and they helped protect us. Oh, Transformers. Robert Downey Jr., Tony Stark. Iron Man. Woody. They all live in this kid's room. Yay! Toy Story! Yeah, thank you, Sienna. It's my new favorite game. It's my new favorite game. Victory. He's all in. If it works. That's the worst high five ever. No, no, no. You missed the high five between Woods and I this morning. Can we try to recreate our high five from this morning? Jay and Woods just did a high five. And Jay's pinky touched Woods' thumb. I looked down at the wrong time.

1:58:33Gotta pay attention to the high five. Those are so awkward. Like, do you do another one or do you just go? M1 Public? Hey, what's up? You just got, because of Woods, you just won meet and greet to Weezer. Congratulations. Hang on the line, bro. That was great. Give me Rivers Cuomo's autograph, please. Which one is Rivers again? The singer. Yeah, that's right. I'm just messing around with all of you. Hey, Woodsy. Hi. So, you know how distracting text messaging can be when you're driving. Yes, I do it frequently. I do not. I do not. You know what I have? I have an app on my phone called Dragon, and it's a dictation for text. That's so cool. Yeah, so I'll speak, but I have to press the button to start it. And that's something that iPhone has? iPhone. That'll be, we gotta go. Man, we gotta go. I tried to ask the guys at Apple yesterday. For what?

1:59:35When it's coming to Verizon. They're like, shut up, shut up. Yeah, I did get that look like I was going to get taken out back. Ixnay on the Eschen's quay. Yeah, Ixnay on the Verizon vape. Yeah. He said, they don't tell us anything. Shut your mouth. Shut your mouth. Shut up. Nobody knows this. Shut up. A big guy in an Apple costume pokes his ass. What are you guys talking about over there? He gives me the slit throat signal. If you're smart, you'll walk away right now and you will never look back. Hey guys, what are you talking about? Nothing, nothing. We're not talking about anything. I'll come out here and rough talk him and run him off. I saw two men in black in the corner, and I was like, what happened? Next thing I knew, I was in my car. Little earpieces. Well, what do they say, Sienna, is also really bad? Well, AAA just did a study on the bad things, the distracting things you may do when you're driving. Talking on the phone, texting, obviously the big ones. Like, Woods is going to be guilty of every one of these things. Oh, yeah. Talking on the phone, texting. Check. And this last one. Check.

2:00:35Driving with the dogs in the car. How about five dogs in the car? How about five dogs not in a cage? Yeah, in your lap as you're driving. True story. How about Penny Bell licking your lips as you're driving? True story. How about sitting your beans trying to drive on your lap? That's right. I've done it too. I do it all the time. They're so sweet, and they want to stick their head out the window, and they want to be next to you sticking their head out the window. Yeah. So why not just let them be the sweetest? When you see a cop, though, and you have your dogs, do you, like, tuck them away? No, it doesn't bother. It's not against the law. I always feel like I'm going to get in trouble. I always grab Zipper and, like, throw her in the back. Really? You do? Yes. I have a bit where usually once a day I have to go to, like, 7-Eleven or Chevron. And, like, at night I'll want, like, something sweet, weird. And I'm like, babe, you want anything? No? Okay, I'll go. And so I always take Lucky and Sunny Senior Beans with me. And it's literally their favorite part of the day, man. They stick their head out the window. I'm driving. I got them tucked in each arm. And I hold them tightly. Oh, gosh. Hey, guys. Yes. Captain Buzzkill. Captain Buzzkill. Really, dude? Oh, man. I think it's so inappropriate for you to go drive around with animals in your lap. What am I supposed to do?

2:02:00Don't you realize that you're putting your animals in jeopardy? That is true. He is right on that. If you really love them, then you would put them in a seat belt or a baby seat. Baby seat? I have five. Well, if you have five, then you should have five little crates. You don't have any problem putting them in. Captain Buzzkill, do you have dogs? Well, have you ever seen the look of excitement on their face when they have their head out the window and that wind is blowing back their ears? Of course he hasn't seen that.

2:02:53No, I haven't, because they're in the properly positioned area of the conference. Everything's by the book, right, Captain Buzzkill? Everything should be by the book. You're playing it, right? Everything's politically correct as well. Isn't it your guy's own, Mikey, that says... You know who that doesn't happen to. Yeah, I know. Do you have a job, Captain Buzzkill, or do you just sit around waiting for us to say inappropriate things? Yeah, with a pen and a paper. I won the lottery a few years ago. I spent my time in philanthropy. I just want to help out, and that's why I try to take part in message boards and get the word out. Help out your fellow man whenever you can. It's a bad idea to be techy and to talk on your phone. I know. I'm working on it. All right, well, I have to go because I'm going to write some stuff on the boards about you. Okay.

2:03:56Actually, I was reading more about this article about the dogs in the car. In Nevada, it's a misdemeanor to transport an animal in a vehicle in a cruel or inhumane manner, and that's keeping them loose in the car. What? And it could be punishable by imprisonment in county jail for up to six months. Really? Or a fine of up to $1,000 or both. So what are you in for? My dog. My dog's sitting in the car. I've got four Yorkies. I just kind of let them run free. The guy pulled me over and here I am. The Obamas are about to take a 10-day vacation to Martha's Vineyard. Weren't they just on vacation? Yeah. In the Gulf. They went to the Gulf. They went to the Gulf for 26 hours. Maybe you get back to work. No, they went, I think they went to, yeah, they went to Maine, I believe, in the beginning of the summer. And then Punk Court.

2:04:48Yeah, and then people gave him a hard time, like, oh, here's Obama telling everyone to go to the Gulf when he's going to Maine. So then they made a 26-hour trip to the Gulf where you may have seen a picture of him and his daughter Sasha in the water. They played putt-putt. Yeah, they played putt-putt. And now the whole family is going to Martha's Vineyard. And, yeah, there's some people that are upset because it's like, okay, how many vacations are you going to go on, President? Didn't Michelle just get back from Spain for a week, too? Like, what? Can you imagine if there were a national crisis? They're on vacation. He's taking a call, and she's like, dear. Vacation. Yeah. And he's like, I forgot, I forgot. I forgot. Sorry, sorry. Closed his laptop. They say he still does do presidential duties while on vacation. You have to, right? Yeah. Well, he only has five people in his Blackberry contacts, too. That's right. It's not like he'll be texting. But if you're the president, you can't really, you gotta do stuff. Even on vacation. Oh, yeah. There's no such thing as vacation for four years. Right? You would think. Unless you're George W. Bush. Amazing. I just wanted to get you real good, man. Twist it. You just want to twist that knife. Feels real good. I love it. A little deeper. Let's see. Tell me about, oh, you know what I want to talk about? What? These new shoes. They're so funny.

2:06:10They look like gloves. They're disgusting. Oh, yeah. They're shoes that you run in, but they look like feet. They look like a Bigfoot track. Yes. Oh, they're so bad. Okay, you may have heard of them. They're called Vibram Five Fingers. And apparently this is what Matthew McConaughey's running in, his wife or girlfriend's running in, Channing Tatum. It's a new celebrity thing. They're not cheap either. They're expensive. I was trying to find out how much it was. I saw them at REI. What was I doing there? Seeing how the other half lives? Yeah, were you asking for directions? Yeah, seeing how healthy people live. But they have them all over the place, but they can be like 120 bucks. Yeah, but that's how much good running shoes are. They look to me like those underwater aqua socks. Yeah, but they have a slot for each individual toe. It's creepy. Which when you think about, you're like... You know aren't your toes gonna get all sweaty you know and like your individual toe cuz you can't put socks on your toes get sweaty when you have socks on and go for a run I know but you that's what absorbs the perspiration with these there are no socks and breathe out I got an idea and stink

2:07:22I got an idea. What? Maybe just wear running shoes. Yeah, how about that? No, they're saying that running shoes are one of the biggest causes for injuries now. That's what they're saying is a lot of it has to do with the cushion in the running shoes and blah, blah, blah. So they're saying running without shoes actually strengthens your feet, ankles, and lower legs and improves your balance. So that's the point of these new Vibram five-finger slipper things. Because you feel like you're running barefoot, except there's a cushion underneath your foot, somewhat of one, to protect your feet. Like pebbles and stuff. Something tells me I do not have to worry about it one bit. No. But they're probably actually better for you because you were born without shoes on your feet. Well, they just run barefoot then. These things are being sold out everywhere. There's stuff all over the road that you can step on, glass on the beach, needles. That seems to be the new thing, though. Everybody's running barefoot. I saw a guy at the gym wearing them, and it was hysterical. Oh, wow. Hysterical. You're a dork. It's a glove on your foot. You're a dork. You are not a dork. You're a giant dork. No, you're not. You're in shape. You're a dork. I think it's kind of dorky looking. Kind of. Look at it. It looks like a Teva with finger toe holes. You look like a clown. You're a nerd. There's even knockoff ones now. People are into these things. The problem is that my toes would probably not fit in the hole.

2:08:41thing, you know. They have to have different sizes for toes and stuff. They do, but inevitably somebody's toe is going to be too long or too short. Tell you what, you go to a Harry Potter opening, you're going to see a lot of those. No, you won't. You won't not. Go to the Tour de France. Go to the Tour de France. Yeah. Yet another reason to hate France. Oh, no. Dude, those do not look good with a wizard hat. No. Want some tips on how to break up with a friend? Friend? A friend. Actually, yes. Uh-oh, the bromance is coming to an end. I wish I knew how to quit you. All right, we'll tell you next. One of the new features of Studio M, the new studio that's being built for The Mikey Show, is that there is a giant-sized billboard that they rolled out by a professional wallpaper guy.

2:09:58rolled out that looks like our billboard. And Jared did it. You can find Jared's website, createyourdesignonline.com. He does graphic design. He'll do a website for you. He can do business cards. He can do all that stuff for you. So check him out, createyourdesignonline.com. High-end design, high-end printing, very, very cool stuff. Mikey's show is me, Woodsy, Lauren, Sienna, and Jay. We are all wearing pregnancy bellies, and they're heavy. They're noisy. How are you guys feeling? They're noisy. They are noisy. They are noisy. You're doing good. My neck hurts. That's why I have to take the bra strap off. Jay's, I have to say, Jay's doing the best. My hernia hurts. Man up is what I say. Or woman up. Don't you also say get some? Yeah, dude, that's my favorite saying, get some. It's your tagline? Get some. Get some. Hey, Jay, what's your tagline? Get some.

2:10:58This doesn't make sense. Like, when would be an appropriate time to say that, Jay? What are you going to do this weekend? Get some. I don't know. Hey, Jay, I'm going fishing this weekend. Get some. I have to go to the hospital this weekend. Woo, get some. Woo, get some. Wow. That's an extra excitement. Well, you know, hospital's weird. Get some. All right, so, Sienna, how do you break up with a friend? Well, there's different ways because there's different levels of friendship, you know? Yeah. It's not easy to break up with a partner, but it's even harder to break up with a friend. It's very hard to break up with my partner, Sienna. Yes. Okay. So there's three levels of friendships here in this article. One is the casual clinger. This is someone, you know, you don't really know that well, but they just really want to hang out with you. So, you know, you treat it like a situation where you would, like a guy that you've gone on a few dates with, basically. Maybe you just... Oh, maybe busy right now, but maybe next month we can hang out. I have a lot of more open schedule, you know, so next month comes, he calls. Yeah, and still busy, and then eventually it will fade away. Now, by the way, I want everyone to know that I take the straightforward tactic. Oh, no. You know, I don't play any of this business. I just say, no, I can't. Then I say, why? I can't, you know, I can't do that. I'm not allowed. But they don't ever say, dude. I don't say I'm not allowed. I'll come over to your house. They say no.

2:12:23And I say, I can't. I don't have time, which is generally the truth. Now, if they say, I'll come over to your house, I say, no. I learned this a while back, by the way. Wow. Let me tell you. The feelings. No, no, no. Listen, honestly, I said to my shrink one time, I said, listen, I have this really hard time because a lot of people want my time. And I said, and I even have this one person that said that they want to come over. And this is the way that they did it. They wrote me an email and they said that they wanted to come over and they wanted to bring me something. I said, and it's something nice. I said, but I don't want them to. And I don't know what to do. And she goes, you just say no. And I was like, you know, I was like, how do you just say no? And she goes, well, what's the worst that can happen if you say no? And I remember that hit me like a ton of bricks. I was like, I don't know. I go, isn't that really rude? She goes, no. But then they try again. Oh, no. Oh, no, no. No, they don't. But then they're sad. Listen, the answer, though, has to be if somebody is saying that they're just going to come over or whatever, or if they ask you, a person cannot expect that they can just run riot. They can't.

2:13:43And that's what I didn't realize and needed to realize is that people aren't just allowed to come over. Yeah. They're just not allowed to, you know. And so there has to be either a yes or a no. I get talked into it. Me too. I start and I'm like, no, no. And they're like, oh, just for a little bit. Let me see you. Let me see the belly. You know, stuff like that. I'm like, okay. I gave you some lessons, Sienna. I know. I'm not good at it. Lauren and Mikey are the. Mean ones were the nice Or the assertive ones or the ones with balls. Yeah, yeah, I have or I just don't answer the phone and you know like I'll do the blame screen bit screening for yeah, I didn't get that miss call weird I know what that was about. Yeah, it's it listen It's tough, but you you have to you have to you have to be able to you know, you're all about setting boundaries So the casual clinger, the person you don't know that well, you just kind of do a little fade away, basically. Now there's acquaintances that may be in your same social group. So if you blow them off one time, you're going to end up running into them again and they may be a little hurt. Don't be a hypocrite, Mike. Maybe your whole crew. Don't be a hypocrite. What? You just talked about setting boundaries. L-O-B. It's okay if I set boundaries. Yeah, but you never want to hang out with us.

2:15:04Mike is upset because Lauren doesn't hang out. I hang out just as much as Sienna does. Sienna's pregnant. Who cares? No, but wait a minute. That's a big deal. But wouldn't you say that Lauren is the toughest to get to do stuff? 100%. Yes. Out of the whole crew. She hates that bit, but it's a true bit. When was the last time you asked me to do something that I said no about? Racetrack. I had a gig. Well, I know there always is a thing. Yeah, there's always a thing. I'm sorry I have a life. I know, I know. Sorry about that. I'll try to just ixnay all my friends and family out of my life. Dedicate my life to the Mikey show. But then, if you don't invite her, then she goes. If you don't invite her, she goes. What? How come you didn't invite me? How come I didn't know about this? She does do that bit. Doesn't she do that bit? You can invite someone or you can badger someone to make them feel guilty for having other plans. We do not. Lauren is allowed to have a life outside. She has friends. She has family here. She has an adorable little niece that she's with all the time. That is true. That is true. No, it's okay. It's for you to slit our throats here. Let's just hand her a plastic butternut. Just mine. Just mine.

2:16:23In this article, they're saying, you know, if you have that friend that's friends with your mutual friend and you just don't want to hang out with them, they say the best way to do it is just put it out there and just say, look, I'm sorry, the chemistry's not there. Look, I'm sorry, L-O-B. I mean, just kidding. She's gonna say that to me. She's gonna be mad at you, Mike. I would stop. You're dead. You're dead. And then the last level of friendship is, like, the friend that you've been friends with for a really long time. Maybe they just... Oh, my God. She's so mad. She's mad. She's mad. She never gets mad, really, but she's mad now. She's mad. You're dead. Pop this pregnancy belly. It's Friday. Let's all be friends. She's gonna throw her pregnancy belly at me. Let's all hold hands. Come on, everybody. Let's join Mikey. Take his hand, L.O.B. Take his hand. Do you have other plans? I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

2:17:13I'm kidding. Did you just put his boob up to the window? Mikey likes to push the envelope. Yeah, he does. I push the envelope real good. So if you have that friend that you've been friends with for a really long time. Come on, it's a joke. And the friend is something really shady or something happened. Mikey. You have to sit down with a friend and say, look. You really upset me. I can no longer be friends with you. Oh, wow. That's like a breakup. It's a little harsh. It's like a breakup. You have to break up with your friend, basically. Nobody breaks up with a friend except for one way. You do the trail off. Fade away. It says, too, that with a really good friend, you can send them an email and explain everything and why you don't want to be friends anymore. But that's kind of a shady move, I think, too. Because the other person should be able to be involved. You're a... Woman. You're a wuss if you do that. It's better than The Fade Away. At least it's giving an explanation. It is, but it's also like, okay, if it's in this, she's saying in the case of a good friend, if it's a good friend, you go, hey, man, we got some stuff to talk about. They deserve a talk. But what if you're just done with them, though, and you don't want to be convinced into being friends with them? Woodsy, could you ever in a million years imagine yourself saying to some guy that you're friends with, dude, we got some stuff to talk about? Yeah. Oh, dude, I've had it. I could see him saying that. Really? Yeah. Bark Maumann, you remember?

2:18:38Yeah, but you wanted to salvage that. Oh, yeah, and that was the thing like you guys had that dynamic or you would get up in him and he'd get up in your business. I wish I knew I had a quick move. That never happened, by the way. Ever. We are platonic friends, okay? You know how I know you're gay? Mikey's face right now is buried into his pants. Because I hate when I walk into him. Like, I don't help myself. I know. Hey, everybody! We're all gonna get laid! Great. I don't know that I've ever... I don't know that I've ever just... I don't know if I've ever, like, booted a friend. A friend. Fade away. Fade away. Fade away. I've never said, hey, we need to talk and it's over. But if it was a really good friend and they were doing stuff that was wrong, I'd say, hey, man, we're having lunch today and we got some stuff to talk about. We may not part pals.

2:19:33What's the point of talking it out if you don't want to be friends with that person? I don't know that there's ever been anybody I was friends with that I said, I just really am over it. I don't want to be friends with them anymore. I have, and then I never do it, and I just stay friends with them. I did it for six months, and then I had another friend pass away, and so I thought, you know, this is stupid. I'm at least going to give the guy one more chance, so we went for a beer, and we hugged it out. That's good. Sometimes you know what you need? You need time apart. He just needed to stop being an idiot. Well, that too. Yeah, because a lot of friends, you'll do a fadeaway, and then you go back, and then you do a fadeaway. I know people that they'll be in a friendship like that, but they'll come in and out of the friendship. You know what I mean? They come in and out of it. How about the America's top most dangerous jobs? I don't imagine that they change much because it's always crabbing is the number one. I don't know that anything's ever going to overtake crabbing. Going out on the sea and catching crab is always the number one. Hardest job. Well, you're close. Crabbing. You're close. Yeah. Fishermen. It's the same, right? Basically. Yeah. Fishermen, loggers. Yeah, it's everything manly. Yes, that Jay can do that we can't. No, no. Airplane pilots. No, that's manly. You're flying a plane. That is manly. Yeah, but women can fly planes now, Woods. It's legal. Oh, boy. Not bad. I'm not saying that women can't fly planes. I'm not saying women can't fly planes. They're plenty capable and great pilots. Women can fly planes, ladies. Better than men. They can fly them better than men.

2:21:04Anything we can do, they can do better. That's right. Farmers and ranchers, roofers, iron workers. Have you guys seen when the dudes are out with mops in the summertime with the tar on the road? Is there anything that looks more hideous than that? No. So hot. Oh, my gosh. And it's bubbling, and it's hot, and it's a whole thing. Isn't that like a jail punishment? It does. What about the people that, like, I don't know what it is, but they throw things into, like, an incinerator and have to wear, like, a welding mask? I'm in on that. I would love to do that. Really? Yeah. I hate seeing stuff that looks like lava when they're making, like, steel stuff. So cool. Pouring steel. Steel. Like a blacksmith. I'm sure I would lose a hand because we could melt it off. I'd melt a hand off. It says the sanitation workers on the list. Is it a dangerous job? They endure hazardous wastes all year long. Can you imagine if we were to talk to somebody that does that for a living, if you said, what's the top ten three grossest things you've ever seen? You probably couldn't say it on the air. Body parts. Yes, yes.

2:22:13I bet they've seen hideous stuff. All kinds of stuff. Construction laborer. Radio personality. Nuh-uh. L.O.B. L.O.B. Got you. Really. We really take some really dangerous tasks over here. Well, we do have a BB gun. We do get up early. That's for sure. Oh, no. Hey, now, he's a topper. He can top you all day. Hey, now, yeah, he's that guy. He's a walking cliche. Topper is 39 years old. Is that how old you are, Topper? No. How old are you? Don't worry about it. He tries to come off like he's in his late 20s, early 30s. I miss you guys. Do you? Hey. Where have you been? I've been in France. You've been in France? Yeah, I was at the Riv. You were what? The Riv, the French Riviera. The Riv. Topper and I were having a conversation in the hall a little bit ago, and I was telling him, oh, there's this news story I saw recently. Tell me about it. Tell me about it. I lived it.

2:23:17In France right now, they're giving tickets, $49 tickets, to any man walking around burying his chest. I lived it. Because the people there. What is that? Those are tickets. He made it rain. Those are all the tickets that I got when I was at the Riv in France. Then how come these are parking tickets from Escondido? No, I must have gotten that one mixed up. Really? I got, dude, I lived over there with my shirt off. Did you really? They kept coming up and saying, hey, man, you need to put your shirt on. I said, I don't know what the hell you're talking about. They're tired of seeing hairy, bare chests. As you can see, mine's not hairy. Don't, don't, don't, don't show us. Don't show us. L.O.B. What's up? You're looking good with that belly. That's weird. I can make that a reality for you. Really? Nothing. Lauren has a pregnancy belly on right now. If you're so inclined. Nope, I'm not. She's not inclined. Nope. Hey, Topper. Can you never show us your pierced nipples ever again? No, don't. I don't want to see. They're bars. They're purple, too. They're bars. So what's up? Well, besides that piercing that you have in your tongue, nothing. Yeah, it's so gross. Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do that. That's so annoying to listen to. You know that's four. Shut your mouth. What?

2:24:37For looking like a clown? Yeah. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Topper comes in. He wears his hat to the side. Dark glasses. What? It's my visor. Is it a visor? It's my University of Florida visor. Oh, jeez. But you didn't go to the University of Florida. Yeah, I did. Did you? First semester. I went to junior college next door. Next door. Close enough. Next door. Topper. Give me my tickets back. You still driving the H2? Yep. The Hummer. Yeah, I got a new one. So what were you even doing in France? Dude, I have friends over there, man. I went and saw Johnny and Vanessa for a while. Johnny and Vanessa. Johnny Depp. Your friends with Johnny Depp. I stayed with them at the Riv. Really? But I went into Paris to see Oakenfold. He was spinning. What? Yeah, Paul Oakenfold. He was a DJ. Maybe. Of course, I don't know who that is. Something else other than Los Lobos. All right. You'd really dig it, man. It's cool. House music, man, changes the world. Maybe we put that on a t-shirt. House music changes the world. Put that on a t-shirt. Well, Topper, it's certainly nice to have you in here again. It's good to be back, man. I'm going to go to the beach. LLB, you want to roll?

2:25:46I'm all good, actually. You sure? Thanks. Yeah, you have fun. Okay. All right. Thank you, Topper. Put some sunscreen around your nipples. Get out of here. Yeah, you don't want to burn those. We've got new movies that are coming out this weekend. What do we got? Oh, we have The Switch. That is with Jennifer Aniston. That's why she's all over the news. She's been promoting this, too. Jason Bateman. I love Jason Bateman. Jeff Goldblum. Juliette Lewis. Yeah, they're all in this new movie, The Switch. PG-13. I don't know. It's got Jason Bateman in it. Well, did you see Extract? I heard it was terrible. Did you see Teen Wolf 2? I heard Extract was terrible. It was the worst. Piranha 3D is out. How come that movie's getting so much buzz? Piranha? Because it's got gorgeous girls in it? I don't know any. The only name I know is Jerry O'Connell. Oh, boy. Who always reminds me of Jason Bateman. Must miss. Yeah, it does. It's rated R. I think it's supposed to be real scary. Maybe they tried 3D again in 50 more years. Seriously. It didn't work in 87. It's not working now. Kids love the 3D. I hated it when I saw Alice in Wonderland. It was the worst. I didn't think it was very good. It wasn't very good. That wasn't shot in 3D. They added the 3D effects after. See, the ones, though, dude.

2:27:04Even when they are, Woodsy is giving his greetings nerd Vulcan sign. It's really, the camera that they have to use is like really heavy and expensive, so you can't get to all the angles that you could with a regular camera. What about Avatar? Was that shot for 3D? Yes. It was? Because I didn't think it was that, it didn't really blow my mind. Wasn't that mostly animated though? I don't know, but all I know is that stuff didn't jump out at me. It looked real beautiful. Didn't jump out. You should see Despicable Me or Raising My Dragon or whatever it was. How to Train Your Dragon. I'm waiting for that to come out on DVD. Maybe wear the glasses at home, watch them pop out. I know, it's such a good movie. But also out today, Nanny McPhee Returns. That was a really big one for the kids. Emma Thompson. Also out Lottery Ticket that has Bow Wow Ice Cube. Brandon T. Jackson. It used to be Little Bow Wow, right? Little Bow Wow. Yeah, because he's like 42. Yeah, he dropped it. And then the last big movie this weekend actually came out on Wednesday, Vampires Suck. It's a parody. Is it? It's a parody of Twilight Zone. I hate those parodies. They've had a couple ones that were pretty funny. Yeah. Not just another teen movie is one of my favorites. That was the first one. Is that the one where she says, oh my God, we hit a boot?

2:28:21They're reenacting the I Know What You Did Last Summer. Yeah, I remember that. And they hit this fisherman. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And they hit something, and she looks back, and there's just this one boot in the road. And she goes, oh, my God, we hit a boot. That's great. Would I like those? You'd like that one. You'd like that one. It's funny. He would not like that movie. I'll bring it over next week. We'll watch it when you're all laid up. Where I can't move. I have you as captain. Well, let's turn this movie off. It's like the movie Misery. He's got you all tied up in bed. I want to real quickly talk to Kamaria Allen, who came here today from the San Diego Regional Center, which really helped my son, Jake. San Diego Regional Center helped Jake with everything that had to do with his... The people that helped him out with his autism and they're gonna be doing a fundraiser and I wanted to have you tell everybody about the fundraiser and how it works and all that stuff So what's going to first of all? Thank you for coming. No problem. It's a joy to be here. I love to spread the word for our foundation. That's awesome. So what do you got?

2:29:29Well, the Foundation for Developmental Disabilities, which raises a lot of funds for the regional center when the regional center can't cover everything, then the foundation can step in and provide clothing, housing, medical needs, things that the regional center can't cover. Right. Okay, so how do people get involved? Because I know you guys are going to do an event, right? We are. We're doing Foundation Day at the Races. It's our largest fundraising event that we do every year. It's going to be at the Del Mar Racetrack. Cool. And, well, it's going to be Wednesday, September 1st. And the gates open at 12. It's going to be fun. A lot of people bracing. And it's going to be at the Equus Sky Room at the Del Mar Turf Club. And that's, like, overlooking the finish line. It's a beautiful, beautiful place. Nice. Well, we had fun there. We had a blast. It's a good thing. And I really want people to support this. And tell everybody the date again. It's Wednesday, September 1st. Cool. And they do so many good things. So many good things. San Diego Regional Center is so cool. They do so many cool things. And I just really wanted to be able to support them. And thank you for telling us about it. Is there a website, too? Yes. You can visit our website at www.foundation4dd.org. For more information, you can register, make a donation. Or you can contact the foundation office. And that phone number is 858.

2:30:53Thank you very much. Got a question for you if you're listening right now. If you have grown-up kids that have never been arrested, never gotten in trouble for drugs, never gotten any of that stuff, you basically raised good kids. My dad's in the studio, you know. Yeah, well, that's good. Yeah, right. The question is... How did you do that? You've been married for over 20 years to the same person. How did you do that? There's generally a rule of thumb or there's generally a philosophy. And we wanted to ask, how did you do that? If you have something exceptional like that, for instance, maybe you have had, maybe you lost 50 pounds. You kept it off. Did you do that? Yeah, me neither. I just gained some weight during the course of the show. How did you do that? Call us up. Let us know. We want to talk to you. It's called How Did You Do That? Hey, I want to let everybody know that FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion 2010 is August 29th. And it's $30. That includes all the fees and everything. So it's just $30. And it will include Edward Sharp, Magnetic Zeros, and...

2:32:55Rogue Wave, and The Wigs, and Delta Spirit. And tickets are selling out. Yeah, you better hurry. Hey, Tattoo, are you going? I'm going to go because I'm going to be playing the sad stage. You mean the short stage. Short stage. Yeah, it's ugly because they're short stage, but I've been calling it the side stage. Just keep calling it that. I do magic tricks. You're the bunny inside the hat. I actually have both pull me out of a hat. I put on little ears, and then he pulls me out. It's so cute. That's right. I also do other really amazing tricks, like I jump rope. That I'd like to see. That's all. I just jump rope. Just jump rope. It's amazing. Perfect magic. Do you sing when you jump rope? Yes, I can sing. Would you like to hear it? Yes. Yes. Oh, you said to me three, as you said. This is from Katz. Oh, memories. Yeah.

2:34:01Oh, is that the word? It's memories, yeah. I thought it was, oh, how you talk to me sweetly. No, it's memories, yeah. Memories, how you talk to me sweetly. That's the way it goes? No, not even close. What else we got? Oh, yeah. Did you guys want to hear Christopher Walken doing a dramatic reading of Lady Gaga? I would listen to him do anything. I want him to hold him. like they do in texas plays fold them let him hit me raise it baby stay with me i love it luck and intuition play the cards with spades to start and after he's been hooked i'll play the one that's in his heart oh oh oh Speaking speaking of singing stars Tell me who this is I would give the world to see how I used to be

2:35:22When I had no axe to grind except for chopping wood. Oh, my God. Day was day and night was night. Wrong was never right. An actor. Very old now. Icon. Legend. Walter Matthau. Nope. Probably around that same age. Do you feel lucky? Movie director. Clint Eastwood. Wow, really? Clint Eastwood. Sounds so gentle. I know. Yeah, very different than Bertie Harry. He's got a very sultry. He sang the song in Gran Torino at the end. Did he? Yeah. What did it sound like? Terrible. Gran Torino. Why the people? How about this one? Oh, I know this. Roseanne? Roseanne. No. Nope. Victoria Jackson. Nope. Saturday Night Live. I know who? She shares. Share. No, she shares.

2:36:30Sienna's last name. Former last name. Former last name. Denise Richards. Yeah. That is correct. Tommy Lucky. Is she trying to be serious? Yes. That's terrible. Terrible. Oh, wow. I can't do it. Daddy Lucky. Daddy Lucky. Daddy Lucky. The song or the girl? Daddy Lucky. The girl. Jay did. I'm sorry. She's nasty. She's nasty. She's not my type. No, mine either. I gotta go. Apparently I work with a bunch of gay guys. How about this one? Singing like Pearl Jam. Dennis Rodman. Oh, wow. Is he at a karaoke bar? Isn't that terrible? That's awful. Live band. He was with a live band. It could be one of those bands you sing in front of. You want another one? Try this one. This one always makes me laugh. It's not supposed to. Oh, God. Man or a woman? Woman. Oh. Rosie O'Donnell? No. Is she trying to be serious or whatever this is? Yeah. Jada Pinkett. Oh, my. Wow. If I was Will, I'd be hiding. She was, I think that her band was on OzFest side stage one year. Yeah. Oh, God. She's got her hair all frizzed out, so it's all in her face.

2:38:16That's freaking terrible. Oh, it's the worst. You guys know me. I am not a fan of the girl lead singer for the rock bands. Trying to be tough. And she's doing all the popping as she's singing like a robot. Oh, gosh. Oh, my gosh. Maybe just let Will be the singer of the family. Yeah. He gets real jiggy with it. Yeah. There's a guy. That lives completely without money. Now he's not a homeless guy. He's living without money, right? Yeah. This guy is living completely without money. He had a job. He had money. And he decided one day he was in a pub, he said, with his friends. We were talking about all the problems of the world. And he decided that all of these problems come from money and dealing with money. So he's done with it. So this 31-year-old guy gave up all of his money, now lives in a caravan that he got from FreeCycle. which is parked at an organic farm near Bristol. He volunteers. What's he? This is nuts. He volunteers three days a week. He grows his own food, has a wood-burning stove, and produces electricity from a solar panel. He has a cell phone, but it's for incoming calls only, and a solar-powered laptop. Now, you want to know how he brushes his teeth? What does he use for toothpaste if he doesn't have money? Recycled toothpaste.

2:39:29A mixture of cuttlefish bone and wild fennel seeds. Why brush your teeth, dude? Of course. If you're going to brush it with that, why brush your teeth? Fish bone and fennel. He had an iPod, got rid of it. Now the birds in the trees are his iPod. He said everything takes more time and effort in a moneyless world. Whenever he washes his clothes, he has to hand wash them. With a conch shell. In cold water, using laundry liquid made of boiling up nuts on his rocket stove. Can't say that either. He said it can take two hours. I mean, really? You're a child. I'm a child. That guy, come on. You don't want to visit him as your uncle for two weeks? He's not hurting anybody. He's hurting me. No, he's not. It hurts me so much. I want to fight him. Can you imagine if that... Why? I just do. I don't know why, Lauren.

2:40:22I just want to go walk up to him and I want to punch him in his bed. No, I don't. I want to shake his hand. I don't. I want to punch him in his bed. Ella, you wouldn't want to stay with him, though. No. If he was your uncle. Heck no. He even said, I'll be lucky if there's one woman in the whole country who wants to give up cash for life. I might not even fancy her. Sweetheart, you're going to go stay with Uncle Roy this summer. No, I'm not going with Uncle Roy. What did I do? Yeah, I don't want to. I'm not going to Uncle Roy. I'm not going to Uncle Roy. His name is Mark Boyle. Oh, you're staying with Uncle Mark. It's going to be great. Uncle Mark. You just sit there, you're like... He said, too, he grew up totally normal. His parents thought he was nuts at first, and now they're totally on board. How does he have an... I mean, he's got to have pay for some stuff. Yeah, don't you? He doesn't. You live off the land? He lives off the land. He's got an incoming... I mean, a cell phone, and it has to charge somewhere. But I think... Because this is in another country. Where's... Where is he? Brazil? No, Bristol. England? England? Yeah. Is it Bristol, Pennsylvania? Connecticut? No, because it's, yeah, no, it's definitely not here. He said he was in a pub. And I think if you have a cell phone, you don't get any charges unless you call out. That's why it says he only gets incoming calls. Oh, my gosh. I know. I don't, I don't, first of all, I don't buy it. Oh. For a second. Right? No, I don't buy it. He's probably the guy that sneaks to Taco Bell at 3 o'clock and was like, it could be 15 tacos right now. He's a vegan, too, so he doesn't.

2:41:48Like eat animals and kill animals. What does he do? He grows cheese? He just brushes his teeth with animal bones. With fish bones. Yeah, he's an animal lover, but he brushes his teeth with fish bones. But he doesn't eat the fish, so it's okay. You know what he scratches his back with? A cow's hoof. It's an eagle talon. An eagle talon. That's what he dials his fake bone with. His pillow is made of baby seal blood. Right, exactly. He loves it. He's a vegan. Yeah, it's his pillow. It's a baby show. He's got a dolphin hanging over his head. He didn't catch it, though. He just found it. A stuffed dolphin. I just found it. I recycled it. You think that guy's ever had a fresh marijuana joint? No, 100%. He's having one right now. For free. Who's the most dangerous celebrity on the web? We'll tell you next. Tonight's 8 o'clock album, ZZ Top, Fandango. That's a good song. I love it. Very good. What does this mean? The most dangerous celebrity on the web. What does that mean? If you're searching for this certain celebrity, the odds of you getting spam or spyware or any of those.

2:43:44computer problems increase. Britney Spears. No. Jenna Jameson. Lady Gaga. No. They're actually surprising. The top three is surprising. Really? Julia Roberts is number two. Number three is Jessica Biel. I... No, I didn't. I just had to search somebody and I thought it was Julia Roberts. You had to search her, Mikey. What was it? I don't remember why. It was something for work. This is a funny, tall, skinny, blonde girl. Cameron Diaz. Yep. That makes my mouth weird. Woods probably looked at the paper. Did you look at her paper? It's got her picture. He cheats every time. Cameron Diaz? Yeah, she's the most dangerous celebrity to search for on the web right now. Most likely to result in online threats. Maybe I'll do it. I know. The girl that doesn't go, and everything. Is that how you got that thing on the computer? What thing? Your messed up thing on your computer. No, he told me it can just happen. He said code is just written by humans like anything else, and sometimes it can just mess up. Let's see. 570-1949-M1-Podcast is on the line. What's up, dude?

2:45:09M1 podcast. He's listening live. Wow, this is a big deal. This is a huge deal. Yeah, well, I'm so glad you guys are on the air, and I wanted to call in this special day to wish Sienna well, and congratulations. Thank you so much. Very cool. It's so cool to hear that you got married, and it's your birthday. It's not my birthday, but it could be. No, it probably is. He got married in February. Yeah. It is when he listens. Oh, okay. He's listening five, six, seven months behind. I did have a birthday in April. Yeah. Oh, okay. But seriously, you know, I'm sure that you're going to be very well, very missed. But, you know, the rest of the crew will keep up with everything. They're going to do great. And you will be missed. And, hey, I also wanted to say, I think that dude should. with his girlfriend to the Masters this weekend. We talked about that maybe the first month on the air. He's so far behind. What? It was a bit all along. I thought he was serious. Yeah. M1 Podcast is on our Facebook fan page and he will comment on stuff about three months behind. Yeah, I love it. One of my favorite M1s. Absolutely. Absolutely. Thanks, guys. That's right. See you, brother. Love you, podcast. Thank you. I love you. We'll see you. That was nice of him. M1 Bisquick from Santee. What's up? Hey, what's up, Skidmark?

2:46:30When Mikey was a young boy, he would often get in trouble from his mama. He wouldn't wipe all the way and there'd be some little marks left in his undies. She would yell to him. Wow, Miguel. My mom actually spoke English. Ay, Cochino! What's going on, Bisquick? Hey, I just wanted to call in. I wrote Sienna an email on Facebook about a week ago just saying, like, you know, how everybody was going to miss her and everything. And one of the things I said was, at your old show, I was probably the first, well, we called ourselves P1s at the time, to call in and welcome her for filling in. And now I just kind of wanted to be the first M1 to just say that her little daughter Sage is gorgeous.

2:47:50Aw, thank you. Thank you, Bisquick. That's really cool, dude. So nice of you, and thank you so much for that message. That really means a lot. We love you. Good to miss you. Take care. Thank you, man. That's M1 Bisquick. You can call us 570-1949 is our number if you want to give us a call. Anybody got anything that they want to promote this weekend? No? Okay. I actually have one. Crickets, crickets. I actually have one tomorrow morning. Tomorrow morning I'm going to be speaking at my home church, North Coast Church, which I don't get the opportunity to do very often. And I will be speaking at the Real Men's Breakfast tomorrow morning at 8.30. And it's going to be really cool. It's a new venue. They're on North Santa Fe. And it's a new church, new building. And it's at a venue called The Edge, which is a really cool place to see a show. And it's fun. They have 500 confirmed men that are going to be coming. And there's a couple of hundred more. I am nervous because it's my home church. Are you going to practice today? No, it's not a thing like that. It's not where I'm getting up and speaking. I'm getting interviewed.

2:49:00And so the first part of it is an interview about just my radio career. And then the second part of it will be interview about where God found me and all that stuff. Don't be nervous then. It'll all be from the heart. Yeah, it will. It's just, man, it's going to be my... home turf, which is scary. You're going to do awesome. You win at home, pal. There you go. You must protect this house. There you go. So it's tomorrow morning, and we'd love to see you come out there and hang out with us. So tomorrow morning, 8.30 is the time. End of the show on Friday. And by the way, this is our... We're nearing when, you know, we're going to be taking a little bit of time off today. Sienna's... Last day with us before maternity leave. And then Monday we will be back sans Sienna. I'll be back soon. Don't forget me. I love you. So we're going to do the show on Monday. And then Tuesday I'm having surgery. Take a little bit of time off. And then we'll be back in here. And I told Sienna off the air, I can't wait until we're all together again. Yeah. And we're in that new studio. It's going to be so rad. It's going to be great. We'll all be aunties and uncles to babysit. That's right. Love it.

2:50:11I tell you my story on Fridays at the end of the show, and the reason that I do is because I truly believe with all my heart that my purpose in going through the things I went through has a higher meaning than just me going through them and just me being on the radio. I genuinely and truly have a desire in my heart to help people. may be going through the things that I have gone through those things are just a feeling of very little self-worth I have gone through my entire life having low self-esteem and feeling in general ugly and guilty have you felt that ever felt guilty have you ever felt ugly Have you ever felt unwanted? Have you ever felt unworthy? Do you feel that now? Those are all the feelings that I experienced all growing up. And the reason that I tell you this is because there was a change in my life. And that's the whole reason I give you my testimony. There was a change in my life in 2003. I was completely addicted to alcohol in 2003. When I would wake up in the morning, my hands would shake.

2:51:49And they wouldn't stop shaking until I drank. If you go to mikeyshow.com, up at the top, there's a little section called help. You click on that. It'll take you to all kinds of resources. It'll give you help on depression, eating disorders, give you help on addiction. That's where I have always been in my life until 2003. 2003, I surrendered my will to Jesus Christ. I gave him the steering wheel of my life. I'm not perfect and my life isn't perfect. But I have hope now. I never used to have that in my life. I never had hope. And I do have that now. If there's anybody listening right now that is feeling desperate, if there's anybody listening right now that feels hopeless, if there's anyone listening right now that's experiencing addiction, if there's anyone listening right now that has a secret that you've never told anyone, that you keep from everybody, including your wife or your husband,

2:53:13But it's killing you because you have that secret. I want you to know that I had a giant, I had giant letters. It was like I had giant letters in front of me that said worthless. And now I have these giant letters in front of me that say forgiven. M-I-K-E-Y-S-H-O-W.com. MikeyShow.com. Please go to the website and hopefully there is something there that will give you hope. At the end of the show, I play a song, and hopefully the lyrics of the song meet you where you are. This is what I mean by that. Hopefully the lyrics of the song have something to do with the place that you are in your life right now. This one's called Pieces. It's by a band called Red. And I definitely felt every lyric of this song at one time in my life. But by surrendering my will and my life over to the care of Jesus Christ, everything changed for me.

2:54:38Lovely and talented Hillary's coming in next. And we will be back on Monday. So we hope you join us. Have a great and safe weekend. We'll talk to you then. Thank you.