The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 08/23/10

1:48Welcome to the Mikey extravaganza. Fun way to put it. Yeah, I like to call it the extravaganza. Every once in a while. By every once in a while, I mean twice a decade. So that's the second time in 10 years I've ever said it. Yeah, good to go for a while. Welcome to the program. It's a Mikey show and Sienna is officially on maternity leave. So weird. I know. It's so strange to look over and that seat is empty. It's the worst. It's so weird. Oh, man. I told her she's my binky. Oh. Yeah, she's my binky. She is a binky. Yeah, she's like my little security blanket. Yeah, absolutely. You know? But anyway, she's out. She's going to have her baby pretty soon. I was really thinking about it yesterday, going, when is that baby coming? No kidding. I texted her. I'm like, do you feel like...

2:45How are you feeling? Are you feeling like you're about to have a pain? Mm-hmm. I kept waiting for a text to come through this weekend and say that she'd had it. Yeah. I guess it would be weird to just send a blank email. The subject line says, dilated yet? With a question mark. That would be weird, right? I mean, that would just be... It's not something that you would have done. No, I didn't. Or did. I didn't, but I'm saying, you know, if we did that now, that would be weird, right? Yeah, that would be very creepy. Yeah. I hope that she has it. Today. I hope, in fact, she's on her way to the hospital and we'll have the baby before we get off the air. I know. That'd be great. Please text us if that's a case, Sienna. What about gut dilation? Is that weird, too? Weirder. The crowd thinks that's great. They like it. Weirder than dilated question mark. Yeah, question mark is weirder. Well, we'll just let her tell us, then. I guess that's what we'll do. What about... You gotta keep it dilated. You gotta keep it dilated. That would probably be okay. Maybe that wouldn't come across as unusual. Well, we'll keep thinking. If we wrote and produced a parody song to keep it dilated, that wouldn't be weird. No, not at all, right? You gotta keep it dilated. Okay, so The Mikey Show is myself.

4:09Oh, I'm not supposed to say that. Don't clap for that. I'm not supposed to say myself. The Mikey Show is me. The Mikey Show is me? That sounds so lame. You can say me. Just say what you want to say. It's going to be me, man. Captain call-outs out there trying to get you. The Mikey Show. See, because my big thing is I always tell people, don't ever talk on the radio differently than you would off the radio. So what would I say? Right. If I was introducing myself to a group of people, I would go, the Mikey Show's me. You know, I'm Mike. I'm the host. And I call myself Mikey for some immature reasons. And Woodsy's our sports guy. And what do you call that? I don't know. He's wearing a different kind of hat today that looks cool. I don't know. I don't know what you would call that. I don't know. A smoke hat? What? It looks like a caddy. Is that what it is? Yeah. I don't know. We were in L.A. and we were walking on Venice Beach and there was this really cool hat store. Yeah. And I'm like, you know what? It's time to switch it up. The kid wears a ball cap every day. You're wearing one of those. The guy goes, Brad Pitt wears these. I go, okay, I'll take one then. Yeah. Yeah, they're great. Like a paper boy hat almost. I kind of like it. Yeah, it's great. I like those. Lauren O'Brien is our assistant producer, and she is a blonde comedian. She's 29 years of age, and she sits to my right.

5:33Sienna's not here. She's out on maternity leave. She is going to have the baby. The baby is actually, the due date is Friday, but we'll see. Did you just flip that paper? What just happened? He just shot a pen like four feet. This thing just broke and shot across the room. Woodsy's got a lot of nervous energy all the time. Today he's really freaking out because he's the guy in charge of getting me all my news stories because Sienna's out. And he gets so worked up. It's hard to calm the kid down. Guy likes to do a good job. He does. We'll get used to it. I got here at 345 this morning. You did great. I had to do all my sports, get my audio in, and then do all the news. I was like, I didn't sleep. A wink. Not a wink. I laid there all night going, okay, how many do I need? What do I need to do? I'm never going to be able to do it as good as Sienna does it. No. You're going to be great. I've already looked at it. I mean, I didn't mean that in a bad way, but you're not meant to. No, you can't replace what she does. That was an overreaction. Maybe he's a little wound up about it. Kid's a wreck. A little bit of a wreck, you know? And Jay's our producer. He is 47, and he's in the next room. And he is a very, very active guy. He does surfing and rides bikes. Great weekend. Yeah, beautiful weather. I bet he did not stay in and watch movies all week. I got way too much sun.

7:01Me too. Surf three days in a row. That's awesome. Why don't you set the appointment, dummy, and tell people about what I'm going to be doing? Wow. Did he just call you dummy? Yeah, he did. It was a little abusive today. A little abusive, Hoyle. Hoyle is our station manager, and he is going to be introducing us to one of his boys later today. 7.30. What's so funny? He is one of my boys. Is he? Well, what's funny about it is that your boys consist of you and Mama. And Mama. Yeah, exactly. Those are my boys. If I get married, Mama be my best man. Oh, wow. And she'll walk you down the aisle. Yeah, I was just going to say. And she'll walk me down the aisle. And Doo Doo will be one of my...

7:57What's that? Say what? Indutu will be one of my groomsmen. What was that? Indutu? Indutu. Indutu? That's his shortened name. His full name is Indutuinda. Oh, wow. It's your boy? Yeah, he's an aborigine. He brought him over for FedEx. Yeah, where is he? He's sitting in the car. I told him he's afraid to get out. Aw. And I asked him how come, and he said he didn't want to get stampeded because early in the morning is when the animals go to the watering hole. Did you tell him not in Mission Valley? I did. He didn't believe you. Well, he didn't. There's no translation for Mission Valley. I think it's just Mission Valley. I think so, too. I think he'd just say Mission Valley. Anyway, and the return of Frankie at 8 o'clock this morning. Where's that guy been? Find out where he's been. I'd like to know. Word of the day today, by the way, is flower. What kind of prize we got today, Jay? Jacef? Hi. There's my mic. There he is. I couldn't reach the paper. We have Wild Animal Park tickets. Nice. Yeah. That's cool. It sure is. Word of the day is flower. When you hear me cleverly work the word flower into a sentence.

9:22Be caller 9 at 570-1949, and you will win. That's right. You will win tickets to the Wild Animal Park. I know what you're thinking. That's it. That's what you're thinking. Well, listen, let me tell you something. Hey, that's a great prize. It's a great prize. Yeah. Do you know how much it costs to go to the Wild Animal Park? Hey, it costs a lot. It does. It does. I'm sure. It does, especially for, what is it, a two-pack? Tupac. Tupac. It's pronounced Tupac. Oh, sorry. California love. No, we mean a two-pack, meaning that you get two pairs of tickets to the Wild Animal Park, which is really cool. This deal with the eggs is quickly becoming ridiculous.

10:14Oh, my gosh. Can I ask you, Mike, if you're doing what I'm doing, and every time your stomach hurts, do you think that you have egg salmonella? Of course I do. Of course I do. You know, and we had breakfast the other day, and Jamie's like, ooh. She had to get her eggs. She got her eggs scrambled. And when I had a little bite, they were a little runny. I was like, ugh. And then immediately I was like, oh, I don't think I feel good. Yeah, yeah. I don't think I feel good. Well, FDA commissioner said about 1,000 people got sick from salmonella from these eggs. If you haven't heard this story, there's been a recall on a bunch of eggs in the United States. A lot of people getting sick from salmonella. They say that on Friday they were recalling more than 170 million eggs. That's insane. Another 380 have been recalled by this other egg farm called Wright County Egg. This sounds like a wrong county egg. Yeah, it does. Yeah, it does. And it's the truth, too. So anyway, this particular place, this particular Wright County Egg, is owned by this dude named Jack DeCoster who has already admitted to animal cruelty and stuff like that. Yep. Because I guess they sent somebody in there.

11:36To check out if they were doing stuff on the up and up and they found out they were putting too many chickens in one cage and all that kind of stuff. And they also found out that people were handling dead birds. Yeah. Then they handle everything else and next thing you know. Yeah. So gross. They were calling him a habitual violator. 150 grand in fines. Oh boy. That's exactly the stuff. That's the reason that my wife became vegetarian. She was concerned about the way they treat the animals and stuff like that. Makes me miss my chickens. Yeah, the missus this weekend told me that she's considering becoming a vegetarian, too. Really? Yep. Great for both of us. Then we cook our own meals and meat. Yeah, we were watching this. show, not Anthony Bourdain, it's this other guy that eats disgusting food. I've had him on a show before. And it's this TV show where he travels around the world and he eats the gross foods of the different cultures. Like, for instance, I was watching it yesterday and this dude goes to Australia and they dig up crocodile eggs. And he takes a knife and he goes and he cracks it in half and he eats this crocodile egg.

12:54Raw. Oh, yeah. Because that's what the culture does. You know, that's what the culture does. And his bit is he goes and he tries, you know, stuff that they do when in Rome. Could never do that. Me either. But anyway, one of the things that he did was he went to this farm in Australia. It's the only farm in the world that produces organic Wagyu beef. For those of you who don't know, Wagyu beef is like Kobe beef. It's the same exact thing. It's the most delicate, flavorful, tender, delicious beef. You've had it? I've had Kobe beef. I've had Kobe before. I didn't like Kobe beef. I thought it was fatty and gristly. That's kind of the point. Yeah. The whole deal with Kobe beef is that it's so delicious because it's got all this marbling. Well, marbling's fat. Yeah, it's fat. And I'm not used to it. I want it lean. I'm very well marbled. I am too. Marbled belly. Yes. I would go for a lot of money because of my marbling. You know, I've had good marbling. That's a good bit. I'm not fat. I'm just marbled. I'm marbled really well. Very well marbled. But with these cattle, all they eat on, they just feast on grass all day. And he doesn't stress them out. Like, that's a big deal. Like, they can't be stressed because stressed out animals make for...

14:18crappy meat so they're real well taken care of they're they're eating grass and uh it's the only organic place in the world well rebecca's like i would eat that beef i'm like i'm in how do i get you back on a steak seriously you know but anyway be careful with the eggs try to you know in terms of you know what what you can do about it all i know is There's another story here in San Diego about how 86 people have been treated for salmonella here in San Diego since May 19th. Wow. Only two cases from January to May 19th. So obviously that's got to scare you a little bit. Something's going on, right? Is it just as simple as just washing the egg or is it something from inside? Washing the egg? I've never washed the egg. I haven't either. I think it's inside. Yeah, he's saying, well, how can you try to, you know. Right. How can you try to make it right? Well, here's what they say. A lot of people are getting it. You know, if you consider 86 to be a lot, I do. Oh, 86 compared to two. Yeah. You know, before, that's a lot of people. In five months. Yeah. But anyway, here locally, or excuse me, the ones that they're talking about here are ones that were coming from Hillendale Farms in Iowa. And they announced that they're going to recall a whole bunch of them.

15:44because of the salmonella thing that's going on. Now, if you're wondering, well, what can I do? How do I protect myself? I guess look for these brands. You know, I mean, we gave you Wright County Egg, so make sure that you're, you know, looking at that. They originally recalled eggs from these brands, Lucerne, Albertsons, Mountain Dairy, Ralph's, Boomsma's, Sunshine, Hellendale. Trafficanda. Farm Fresh. All of these names I'm saying, by the way, I'm like, gosh, that sounds familiar. I've seen it, seen it, seen it. I know. Same thing. Shoreland, Lund, Dutch Farms, and Kemps. What's left? Eglin's Best. Is that real? Yeah. You made it up. No, it's real. I thought you made it up. It's real. Maybe I'll get some from the Isbell Farm. Yeah.

16:41Not anymore. Does anybody have an allegiance to their egg brand and you just get whatever's not cracked? Yeah, you grab the first one you see and you throw it in your deal. You guys check, though, to make sure it's not cracked. Yeah, you've got to open it. Kim gets the organic. Up until Sienna told us that it doesn't make any difference if you get brown or white, I was like, pfft. I used to get brown because I thought I was being all healthy. Me too. And that they were delicious. And then once she said that just because it says grain-fed and hormone-free doesn't necessarily mean anything. Yeah. Now I'm just like, eh. In a lot of cases, it doesn't even mean that that's what they're really eating. Exactly. It's a bit. It's a bit. It's a bit. That's what she said. Does it say anything about what the symptoms of the salmonella poisoning are? Yeah. Diarrhea, fever, abdominal cramps. Check. Check. Between 12. Gross. Now, you'll get that between 12 and 72 hours after you're infected by it. Oh. So you can get it three days later. Mm-hmm. I did have some eggs in L.A. Mm-hmm. It lasts four to seven days. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Babies and elderly people are the ones that, you know, are the most compromised. Jay. Watch out, Jay. What are you going to do? It's going to be bad. It's not good for an older guy like Jay, right? It's his trouble.

18:02You guys hear about this thing that was going on in the Philippines with this bus. Came in this morning, saw that it was going on live. Apparently a guy that was fired by the police department there had on his uniform. He was carrying a rifle and he stopped a tourist bus and was like, hey, can I have a ride? Well, they see a guy in a cop uniform. They're like, yeah, sure. So he gets in, takes him hostage. Oh, my God. Insane. Now, we were just seeing, though, that it looks like it has ended and he's dead. Yeah. Yeah, that's what they're saying. They're saying, I think he had like 25 people in there. Yeah. And they said at one point he sprayed his machine gun over all of the hostages. Oh. I don't know. We still don't know what's going on inside that bus if those people are all okay. Oh, my gosh. This guy has lost it, though. But I guess he wanted his gig back. You know, I was thinking about it, and I'm like, I think that the deal with a negotiator, with a hostage negotiator, is that you have to establish trust. So you have to do, you know, you can't say something you don't mean. Because instantly I was like, okay, sure, yeah, you got your job back. Right. I didn't say that. He's like, really? Okay. For real? Yeah, seriously. We need you to refill out W-4s. Yeah. But you're good to go. Couldn't they say to him, we're going to do everything possible to get you your job back, but by everything possible, they're not going to do.

19:20It's not possible for them. I wouldn't buy that bit, would you? No, because they're not going to. Yeah, they're not going to at all. But maybe everything possible for them, knowing that he's not getting it back, is we're just going to say this. Yeah, and he's probably like, well, what do you mean you're going to do everything possible? But who gets on a bus with a gun and thinks they're going to get their job back? I know. I mean, he's obviously, you know, delusional. Yeah, he's off the deep end. They're like, hey, we're going to have to re-magnetize your key card, the one that you have now. It's not going to work. It's not going to work. Well, he's, you know, he lost his mind for sure. Oh, man. And his life. And his life. I guess they got him today. Mm-hmm. It's earlier in the Philippines. It's still nighttime there. Is it? Mm-hmm. And it's probably still yesterday. Doesn't that trip you out? Yeah. Is it? It's freaky. I don't know where the international date line is. I just know that as you go east, it's later. Hawaii's 3.20 a.m. right now. And the Philippines is west of Hawaii. Look at the big brains on Mike. Look at you. Can't see. Is that Magellan over there? I know it, right? Using the stars to guide me. Did you see that moon today? That was beautiful. Big old giant moon. Gorgeous. It's huge. Weather was all nice and warm this weekend. Fantastic.

20:39Beautiful weather for me to be able to stay inside and watch some golf. Oh, my. Really wonderful golf watching. Let's do that. We should get on that. You didn't go all this time. You've been complaining about how cold and gray it is. It was a perfect weekend. You sat inside? I sat inside, save for maybe four minutes. Oh, my gosh. That I put the twins in the wagon. And I walked them around the block, came back inside. So you just wanted to be nice so you can go, okay, this is why I live in San Diego. But you're not going to partake in any of the nice weather? No, it's worse than that. My mother-in-law said, maybe you put the twins in the wagon and walk them around the block. Oh, boy. And I went, yeah, it's a good idea. It was a good idea. So I did it. It was a good idea. And I came home, sat inside, looked at some golf on the TV. An idiot. Just staring at the TV like I know what I'm doing. Right. Staring at the TV like, I bet it's nice wherever they're golfing. Yeah. That's a good outdoor activity. Well, that's nice, isn't it? Look at those healthy people swinging those clubs around. Oh, man. Well, I guess I'll get up and make a sandwich. It was finally summer this weekend. Yeah, it was. Was it hot? Yeah. Yesterday was the perfect beach day. It's hot in Los Angeles.

22:05Yeah, Woodsy was up in L.A. Did you go outside, L.O.B.? Mm-hmm. What'd you do? Well, vicariously through you. Friday, I filmed a commercial all day. Yeah. And it was outside, mostly. I was doing a whole lot of sitting around. Yeah. Reading, eat, pray, love, weird. How is it? It's good, actually. I'm sure it is. It's good. Phenomenal. Do you have girl parts? You have guy parts. That book just doesn't translate. If you have guy parts, you're not going to want to read it. Yesterday, I went to the beach, and I forgot my sunscreen. My niece is five months old, so I used her baby sunscreen. It's really, really thick. It doesn't spread, so there's random spots of me that didn't get. I'll have to show you guys on the break. Oh, my gosh. It looks like it was like... And I missed parts of... One thing that you've got to know when you're out and you don't have sunscreen is that you can use other devices. For instance, you can take your cell phone, disassemble it, squeeze it, and create from it a sort of aloe protective sheen. I wish that were the case because I had my cell phone. I forgot my sunscreen. I'm not a kid. Hey, I know it's only preseason, but how'd the Chargers do? How'd Brett Favre do in his first game back?

23:32How about that Philip Rivers? You hear about what he did in the game? It was great because I was watching it and Billy Ray Smith was calling the game and he's like, Philip, no, no. I'll tell you what that is. Don't go away. Sure, that's Back in Black by ACDC, which is great. But what about a bunch of Ukrainian guys doing Highway to Hell? What about that? Ukrainian dudes. They don't sing, do they? That's genius. Yeah, get it. My microphone. Get it. Different culture, isn't it? Way different culture. Very different culture than ours. I like the accordion. Yeah. That's so great. That could be your son one day. Oh my gosh. I love he says that because my four-year-old wants an accordion. And my wife supports it. She supports it. You have to.

25:39I guess you do. Get the kid what he wants. Hoyle is going to introduce us to his aborigine friend at 7.30. Frankie will be back in the studio at 8. Word of the day is flower. You're waiting for us to work the word flower into a sentence at some point. So when you hear it, caller number 95701949 is going to win tickets to the Wild Animal Park. I'm going to tell you about what Phillip Rivers was up to this weekend. Did the Chargers win or lose? How'd they do against the Cowboys? All that stuff. So that's all coming up in a little bit. We are in the studio for you today. Doing it up. We are going to be off for a few days because tomorrow I have to have surgery on my hernia. Which everybody thinks is the type of hernia that's down by your boys. I heard you telling somebody out there this morning. Yeah, Len said, hey man, I heard you're having hernia surgery. And I said, yeah. And he goes, yeah, my dad had that. And I said, it's probably, you know, I pointed. I'm like, it's probably down here, right? Oh. And he goes, yeah. I said, nah, this is a different thing. You know, it's an incisional hernia. What is a hernia? A hernia is where your intestines are trying to push out of your body. Through? They push out. In most cases, you're picking up something heavy and it pushes out through the muscular.

27:09Musculature. Now, in my case, I had an incision that went all the way down into where my intestines are. And when they patched me back up, that got a weak spot over time. And so they started to come through that, which means that your intestines can be just under the skin. Hey, hey, hey. Well, that doesn't happen for normal people. It's way under the skin. It's under layers of fat. It's under layers of muscle. It's under layers of stuff, you know? But with me, it's right there. In fact, I was going to let you guys feel it, but I didn't think you... No, no, no. You can't do it, right? No, thank you, no, thank you. You guys, you would trip out. Jay could. Jay could operate on you. You want to feel it, Jay? Yeah, I do. Come here. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. It's pretty cool. It's pretty cool. Why did my boys just shrivel? Hang on. I got to tell you. Don't be afraid because everybody's like all delicate. You can do this. Oh, don't do that. No, no, no, no. I'm telling you. Everybody thinks that you have to do this. You can put, in fact, you won't unless you do. Don't put a bunch of pressure on it. Push, push. He's pushing on his intestine. Oh, my God. Jay is pushing on my intestine. That's my guts. I just touched his guts. Isn't that weird? You can. You want to? You should. Come on, Woods. No way I'm doing it. Come try it. Come try it. It's pretty awesome.

28:30I don't want to. That's awesome. Do not be delicate. This is how hard you can press. Why do you want him to push so hard? Don't be delicate. Why? Because you won't feel it if you do press hard. You feel that? Stop doing it. Stop doing it. Isn't that weird? No, I've seen guts before. I don't need to. There was a little girl from the Dominican Republic that was born without an exit. Yeah, I've heard that. I've heard that. So she had her intestine in a bag. Yeah. At all times. And we had to sometimes, well, I didn't have to, but Saul would get it cleaned off and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. So that's been enough for me. Well, it's not on the outside of my body. It's not on the outside of my body. It's on the inside of my body. But it's just, well, the hair on your arm. My hairs are standing straight out of my arm. I'm all good. Let's see. Okay, so lots of interesting stuff. This was, you know, this was.

29:27brought up an interesting thing in my mind about Lauren. Oh boy. She was saying how Friday night she was having pizza and stuff with her sister and her sister's husband and it reminded you of when you were a kid and stuff because you guys used to have pizza every Friday night growing up. Every Friday. That's awesome. Which I've actually had this conversation with a friend of mine and I've said this before. I'm probably one of the, there's probably 2% of the American population that can say this and mean it. I don't really care for pizza. What? What? Are you kidding me? I gotta call BS on this. It's not, I'll eat it. I'll eat it. You'll feast on it. I'll feast on, I mean. Pizzacatto, you'll feast on it. Yeah, yeah. You'll feast on Pizzacatto. But all that says is that that's the best pizza I've had. Yeah. That's all that says. Most people, if I say to you, Lauren, on a scale of one to ten, how much do you like pizza? Eleven. Most Americans feel this way. Same.

30:27Same? We always joke around that it's like my brother-in-law is from Virginia, and me and my sister obviously are both from New Jersey, and we always joke around that he's always like, hey, oh, because we say it's in our bloodline because we always eat pizza. My sister doesn't eat a lot of anything, and when we get pizza, she can take like four or five slices right to the dome. A lot of people say it's the perfect food. I mean, you've got bread. Oh, my God. You've got cheese. You've got all the stuff that people really love. I really believe that if... If somebody were to tell me you can't have anything else for the rest of your life except for one food, I could pick pizza and be good with it. Yeah, my friend Terry said that, and he and I got into a conversation where he said, I honestly reconsider what I think about you if you don't love pizza. He said, and I've had this conversation with people before, if somebody doesn't really love pizza, I question their integrity, I question their, you know. I agree. Because it should be something that people truly love. Well, I've never been confronted with this situation. Yeah, it's never happened. So I've never had to question anyone's integrity. You're probably reevaluating me. Well, okay, so what would be comparable for you? Like a quesadilla? No! I mean, I'm serious. The tamale. Your Mexicanness is what defines you. It doesn't define me. I am Mexican, but I wouldn't necessarily say that it defines me. You know, I mean, I like Mexican food, but I'm not...

31:50You just call it food. Yeah, to you it's just called food. Comida. Comida. Sorry, we're going to speak the same language. Comida. For me, if I had to pick the one thing, it would be fried rice. Really? Oh, my gosh. Specifically Benihana fried rice. I was just going to say. Nothing better. Nothing better than that. I had fried rice last night from Pick Up Sticks. And I feasted on it. It was so good. I could take it or leave it. What makes it fried? The egg that's in it? No, because they put fat down and put the rice on there and they actually fry it. They cook it and fry it. Amazing. Chicken, onions, peas, carrots. Oh, soy sauce. Carrots. Yeah, dude. Peas. Oh, it's so good. Onions. You couldn't eat, though, an entire bowl of rice and nothing else? 100%. Yes, yes, yes. It's got big chunks of chicken in it, too, so it's like a meal. Yeah. It's the Asian version of pizza because it's got all the things that you want. You know, pizza's got cheese and meat. I'm sick of rice after a while. Not me. I love fried rice. But, yeah, Americans, we love our pizza. Oh, pizza, pizza, pizza. Not me. I can't, you know, I'm not really, it doesn't really do much for me. So my son had his date this weekend. He, my son is three years old, going on four.

33:06Oh, my gosh. With Carly? He's got a big crush on this teenage girl. She's 15. Yeah, she's 15. And she's so sweet. That's more Luke style than Jake. I know. I know. She works at his school? She works at the camp that he goes to. Okay, at the camp. At the camp that he goes to. And she's so sweet that she said that she would come and play with him on Sunday. Oh, my gosh. You are kidding. At the house? At the house. Did he die? Oh, dude. Oh, I got to hear the whole thing. They were outside waiting for him. I was in my office, which is right by the front door, and the front door comes swinging open, and he's stampeding in the house. And I see him stampede into the house, and I'm like, and he's mumbling to himself. I don't know what he's saying. Like father like son. Yeah. And I go to the front door, and I look out, and she's walking up, and that was his reaction. He didn't know what to do. He turned away and walked inside. He didn't know. Oh, my gosh. And so I walked up to him in the living room, and he's smiling, and he's nervous, and I go, bubs.

34:05Come here. I'm going to tell you what to do. And he giggled. He was so excited. He giggled. And I told Rebecca later, I said, you could tell that he genuinely wanted to know. Yeah. What do I do? Yeah. Because I don't know what to do. He is three. He's three. He's got moves. So sweet. And I said, bub, you just have to go and say hello to her. And he does this thing when he's really serious about something where he'll point his index finger. and he'll go, I do not want to do that. I do not want to. So cute, he does. And I say, no, bub, you gotta go, and you gotta say hello to her. And what Jake will do is, you'll be in the middle of saying something, and he'll take your advice, but in the middle of you saying it, he'll just do it. Aww. Aww. So by that time, she'd walked into the kitchen, and he just got up, and he walked in, and he said, you know, I have things to show you, Carly. Come here. Oh, my gosh. He's just showing off all day, I bet. Toys. All day, yeah. Playing piano, shredding guitar. Came back inside and said, and this is my daddy, and this is my mommy, and he was just showing her around everywhere, and she was so sweet. He's got good taste. She was a really cute girl. I wonder if he's going to, like, this will just continue on, and he's going to be, like, a little Casanova by age, like, 15, or if he's going to go through a phase where he's just like, ew, girls.

35:34Lucky for him, he's got his Uncle Woods. Yeah. I actually thought that. Dangerous for him. I know it. But, you know, one of the things was that he wanted to watch Thomas the Train with her. Now, his Grammy was trying to do the thing where she was like, you know, no, why don't you do this so that you're not just watching. And I was, I didn't say it, but I thought, listen, let him do. If that's how he wants to spend the time. His dad tried to build a house of cards with a girl when he was 13. Don't let him, you know, don't make him do anything that's not outside of his comfort level. He wants to do that? Yeah. If daddy wanted to make a house of cards, as goofy as it was, you know, let him do what he's comfortable with, what his comfort level is. Otherwise, you're going to make him feel weird. He's not going to be comfortable doing whatever.

36:33So cute. So he did. He watched Thomas the Train with her. And they sat there real sweetly. So cute. She's 15. I know. Amazing. Did he get all dressed up and everything? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, dude. His hair was all done. He was on point? Yeah, he was on point. PHC? He had the perfect haircut, PHC, and he was ready to go. But let me tell you something, man. That kid's got a crush like you would not believe. That's so fun. I want that. That's so sweet. I really want that. Mm-hmm. Let's do this. Good morning to you again. Bird from... You can tell Bird to stop sniffing around my Woods on Sports. That's right. Yeah, this is Woods on Sports brought to you by our friends at Clearview Eye and Laser Medical Center. Well, Brett Favre made his return last night to the NFL. He practiced all of four days. Yeah. And got the start. Sure. So it must be nice to be Brett Favre. I guess the guy knows how to play football. I guess, man. He played one series. He, you know, completed one pass. Got sacked. Big sack. You know, they... They threw him to the ground, they showed his head, slammed back on the turf. I'm like, 20 years of doing this is a long time, pal. But anyway, they lost 15-10 to the Niners. Here he is on Adrian Peterson and how it's really Adrian's team. Cut one. This team starts and ends with Adrian Peterson. And I think we really realize that now and at the end of last season, how important that part of the game for the Vikings is.

38:16I played the best football I've ever played in my career, and it wasn't enough. Sure, it's Adrian Peterson. Yeah, it's not you, Brett. Yeah, that's why they have a helicopter showing you getting out of an SUV. Because it's Adrian Peterson's team. Well, the Chargers lost to the Cowboys on Saturday night, 16-14. A late safety actually won it for Dallas. Dude, Phillip Rivers, that guy's a freaking football player. Oh, yeah. That guy's a football player. So there was a turnover. And Cowboy safety Barry Church has the football, and he's running about 70 yards. And Phillip chased him about 70 yards and tackled him and knocked the ball loose from him. And it was a good tackle. It was a great tackle, but it's just you don't want to see that, dude, Eddie. You're a $93 million quarterback. Here he is on that situation cut, too. I don't know. I mean, I don't know how you can let a guy score. That's so great. They're keeping score. Maybe the consequences aren't as big in preseason as far as wins and losses, but it's kind of hard just to pass a guy up there. You know what? Darn if you do, you're darn if you don't. If you let the guy just walk past him. Then you're a Sally. Then you're a Sally. Good job, Phillip. Why don't you just watch that touchdown run right past you? Six points. There you go.

39:30You tackle him, and then, you know, what are you doing, man? You're going to get yourself hurt. What would you say if you were the coach? I'd pat him on his butt and say, great job. Me too. 100%. Me too. But I'd be like, don't ever do it again. Don't ever do it again. I would too. Yeah, you know, but also, Mike, the Padres avoided the sweep yesterday by the Brewers. They won 7-3. They had lost the first two games of the series. They are still six up on the Giants. We're about a month away. That is so great. We're about a month away from the playoffs, and these guys can smell it. They can taste the postseason, which is going to be amazing. And then finally, Dodgers broadcaster Ben Scully made an announcement yesterday. That dude is coming back for his 62nd season of calling Dodger games. Yeah. Well, the crazy thing is, is the guy's not 62 years old. This is his 62nd season with the Dodgers. He started when he was 20. He's 82 years old. Here he is on his decision. Cut three. Yeah, I'm not looking for personal accomplishments in any way, shape, or form. Wow, he sounds great. I just love it so much. It's like a very good marriage. And I found that when push came to shove, I just did not want to leave. And my wife understood it, God bless her. And she said, you love it, do it. So I wonder if that means he started when they were the Brooklyn brothers? Yeah, he did. Back in the day, he did.

40:4962 years, so congratulations to him. That's pretty amazing. That's Woods on Sports. The panel is where we talk about stuff that's going on in the news, and we comment on it. Usually it would be Sienna that gives the story, but it'll be me that gives you the story today, and then we'll discuss. Now, we only get 20 seconds to discuss it. We have a timer that has a little bell that goes on after 20 seconds. One of the things on the docket today is this Chinese baby. Don't know if you've heard about this Chinese baby. But they're calling this Chinese baby the Michelin Man. The reason is because he's pretty gigantic. He's a big kid. He's a very, very, very big kid. I'm not kidding you. This little kid looks like a little sumo wrestler. He really does. Now let me see. How big is he? He is... According to his mother, he was born at a normal weight at birth, but thanks to his, quote, ravenous appetite, he now weighs the same as a six-year-old child. And he's ten months old? Ten months. Ten months old. Not even a year old. Ten months old. She looks normal. I don't know how to do the... Yeah, she does. I don't know how to do the conversion.

42:19But he weighs 20 kilograms. I don't know what that is. We'll have to do the conversion. What I can tell you is that he looks like he's about 40 pounds. She's on it. Yeah, he's huge. He looks like he's about 40 pounds to me. To me, he looked like 40 pounds to me. He's giant. 44 pounds. 44 pounds. 44 pounds. At 10 months old. Yeah, my son Jake is almost 4 years old and he weighs 30 pounds. Holy cow. That puts it in perspective. Yeah, so this 10-month-old weighs 14 pounds more than my almost four-year-old. Now, this is the question then for the panel. Do we have a response? No, of course we do. The obvious question to that is, of course we do. So the question for the panel is, how much is too much? And do we need to, with our kids, stop giving them tasty treats?

43:23Desserts, cupcakes, Doritos. Do we stop giving them that stuff? Do we take our kids off of drinking Coca-Cola? What age is appropriate to start giving a child things like soft drinks? Woodsy. Well, they were banned in my house when I was a kid. And I think that was probably a good thing. But I don't know. When I got out of the house, I... started killing them. You know what I mean? At my worst was probably drinking four or five fresh DPs a day. Wow. Which would just get you. So bad for you. So you're... I'm all in favor of... I won't have a lot of Cokes laying around my house when we have a kid. Lauren? See, I was the opposite. It wasn't free reign, but they were there and it wasn't like... We didn't get them as treats. So when I was, you know... Now I'm like, you guys know me, I hardly ever have that kind of stuff because I got overkill. But usually what happens is the way a kid eats as a kid is going to set the tone for the taste that they develop and the patterns that they have. Yeah, man. I don't think kids should have that kind of stuff. I don't because when I was a kid, I was allowed to eat all that. And I was fat. I was a tubby little kid. And I was tubby because I eat tubby food.

44:44You know, I think just like a regular, an adult person, if Lauren were to have a Coke every once in a while, it's not going to change too much because in general, she's got a healthy diet. And so if you use, what's that word? Moderation. Moderation. But somebody that has an addictive personality as well, I mean, that's probably what this kid has. It's like. Give them a little bit and they want more, more, more. Now that brings up a great point because that's the next panel item. I don't know if you've heard about this, but apparently a guy is suing the makers of a video game because he's addicted to it. It's shocking. So my question to you will be, can you be addicted to video games? I know someone that says that they were addicted to video games. Is it a bit? Is it real? You tell us. Call us. 570-1949. But we'll talk about what this guy's suing for next. Oh, that's a good song. Hoyle will be introducing us to his aborigine friend at 730. I'm still trying to get him out of the car. You need some help. I don't need any help, but maybe I do. Does anybody have any alligator eggs? Sure don't. Fresh owl. J-May. Speaking of eggs.

47:55I'm going to try a raw egg. I want everyone... No, hang on a minute. Everybody needs to know that I believe if eggs are out there right now, they're not on the recall list. How could they let them out there? I think they're safe. So I'll eat a raw one. My wife right now is listening going, you do what? Wow. I've never eaten a raw egg. Me neither. I'm filthified by the idea of a raw egg. I'm so nervous for you right now. Relax. Me too. People do it all the time, like weightlifters and stuff. Yeah, I did it because I was a skinny kid trying to put some weight on. Really? Show off. How many did you eat? I just put them in a glass and just dump them down. Like four? No, I did like one at a time. That wasn't that kind of crazy. So I could put it in a cup and then just... Yeah. Problem is we don't have any cups. Yeah. Wait, so does that make you fat, eating eggs?

48:56I thought the protein would bulk you up. Would that be why I was putting on weight? Eating those eggs every morning? No. Protein's good for you. Yeah, and there's not a lot of calories in it. Could be the breakfast burrito that you're eating every morning. That may have had more to do. It was the breakfast burrito. I wasn't eating a breakfast burrito every morning. What were you eating when you were gaining weight? Well, I don't know. I don't have a scale, but I felt chunkier. The eggs. L-O-B. What? L-O-B. The jeans get tighter, and that's how I can tell. But muscle weighs twice as much as fat, so. Yeah, maybe you're turning into a female weightlifter. Word of the day is flower. We haven't used it yet. When you hear me cleverly work the word flower into a sentence, then you call us at 570-194-9. Caller number nine will get tickets to Wild Animal Park. In fact, you get. couple pair. There's a guy that is suing because he is addicted to video games. Now, this brings up a couple of things for me. Number one, what do you think about that? You know, can you get addicted to video games? And number two, what do you think about somebody suing if they did? Because, you know, obviously you go, well, dude, I mean, you're going to sue a place because you, that'd be like suing.

50:18Anheuser-Busch because you're an alcoholic. You know what I mean? But this guy was playing some video game, and his lawsuit claims that he is, quote, unable to function independently in usual daily activities such as getting up, getting dressed, bathing, or communicating with family and friends. His name is Craig Smallwood, and he's suing this North Carolina company out of South Korea that made the game. Now... Yes, me. I don't think that they're responsible for it. He's the one that, you know, got himself addicted to it or whatever. I don't think that Anheuser-Busch is responsible for me becoming an alcoholic. Yeah. You know, the onus has to be on me. I have to be the one that takes accountability for it. M1 Lindsey from San Diego. Are you there? Are you there? Hi. Can you hear me? Yeah. So what do you think? I think the same thing as you, basically. I mean.

51:19You better not get addicted to raw eggs because people can get addicted to anything. Right. If I got addicted to the raw eggs, I can't go suing the egg company. Right. Yeah. Seriously. It's got to be my responsibility, right? Yeah. And if he can't get out of bed and stuff like that, maybe he talks to his doctor about depression or something. Maybe go shoot some hoops, man. Maybe go walk through the park. Right. Maybe try to see a girl naked at some point. Yep. You know, try that bit. Something. Put the controller down. I mean, I do believe that he can be addicted to it. You can be addicted to just about anything. Yep. But that's not anybody's fault but your own. Right. Mikey Show, hello. Yeah. What's your name? This is M1 Cave Dweller. M1 Cave Dweller? Yep. What were you calling to say? Well, I was just going to comment on this guy who's trying to sue a video game manufacturer. And, I mean, it's just another example of the way everybody in America now wants to pass. Yeah, I think you're right. Yeah, I mean, go talk to your doctor. Talk to your counselor of some sort. I don't know. Take action on it. No. See a girl naked. See a girl naked. Is that what it'll take? A French kiss, like a real human girl? Not everybody can. I couldn't. You sure could. Took me a while. I was not, you know, the most attractive young lad.

52:51Not everybody just gets to French kiss anybody they want to. Will? They don't? No. Some of us really have to work hard at it for many, many years. You guys are living in different realities, I guess. M1 Bing from Oceanside. Good morning, Mikey. How are you guys doing? Good. I was going to commentate and say I don't think the guy is necessarily addicted to video games. I think the guy is just not being productive of his time and not doing anything else of his life because check this out. I see video games just like much as skateboarding or riding a bike or whatever you do as, like, a fad or a hobby or a trend because I played a lot of video games when I was a little kid growing up. And how old is this guy that's still in Korea? I think I just threw it away. I don't know. Let's say he's in his 20s. Okay. Well, it's like I'm 20 myself now, and, like, I still have an Xbox 360 up in my room. But as you grow up, you know, if you've got things like school to take over.

53:52Well, yeah, and I could sue Facebook by the same standards. I don't get stuff done. I waste time. Yeah. I don't brush my teeth. I could sue Snickers because I'm fat. Yes. I love Snickers. Might be suing Doritos. Mikey sues Doritos. I mean, where does it end? This is like the hot coffee bit. Yeah. It's just like McDonald's. It's supposed to be hot coffee. Yeah, it's coffee. It's coffee. Who ordered the iced coffee? It's too hot. Jay wrote in his recap, Friday he got an email from an old employee. who was asking for a letter of recommendation. The problem is, Jay fired her. Yep. Like, really? I'm going to recommend you for a job? Wow. And Jay says that he gets that. I've got it a few times. What do you mean you get that? Yeah, I've got it a few times from my employees. Employees that he's let go. Yeah, I think I fire real well. Oh, what? Asking for a recommendation? Yeah. Well, when they leave, too, they're shaking my hand. They're like, hey, thanks, man. Now, do you give them...

55:10Do you give them a BS excuse for why you're firing them? No, no, I full on say, you know, I tell them that they're not appropriate for the job, that they made these mistakes, and we tried to work through it, but I think they're going to find something good on the other side kind of thing. Because I could understand it if you were like, hey, listen, yeah, I just really got to cut back my staff, and then they're like, oh, cool, give me a recommendation. This girl was worse. Jay, do you find that that happens with more men than women or women than men? It's equal. It just, you know, it didn't seem like a lot of people really wanted to work. This one was especially crazy, though, because she didn't. No, no, no, no, no. I don't mean people that you fire. I mean the people that you fire and then come back to you and go, can I have a recommendation? Is that more men than women? You know, I guess it is more women now to think about it. Yeah. Because, Lauren, let me ask you, have you ever done that? Well, first of all, have you ever been fired? No. No, but I'm just laughing because. I know exactly what girl he's talking about. The girls that I'm guessing she was on the attractive side. Knockout. Yeah, exactly. I've never, ever, ever been able to pull that off. But I know girls that will just be able to bat their eyelashes. That's exactly what I say in my recap. Oh, really? Yeah.

56:27I wish I could because you can get free stuff. You can. No, I can't do it. Have you ever gotten out of a ticket? I cried, but that was instinctive. I've never been able to pull the old, well, maybe if you could just. I just can't do it. I'm awkward. The guys on the staff would do her job for her. She would just go, can you help me? Yeah, I mean, I've seen it done a million times. I mean, every dude in here is. You know, been a party to it. Every guy listening right now has done something really stupid and ridiculous for a girl because she's attractive. It's almost like I can't. I know those girls and I roll my eyes on them, but it's almost like I can't hate on them because I'm like, man, if I could do it, I would. No way. You wouldn't. Maybe I would, though. I'm like, man, you got your website done for free. You got this and you got that. There are. That is not something, by the way, that a good-looking guy can do or can he? He can. Good-looking guy can do that with a girl? It's a lot more difficult. Guys are like... Never mind. Okay, guys are more likely to fall for it. It takes a very certain type of woman to be able to fall for a doe-eyed guy. Here's the deal. If I do something now as a 40-year-old man, if I do something now, it's because I willingly am doing it.

57:52When I was younger, I was much more easily manipulated and even knew when the manipulation was going on but would still do it because I was a wuss. Yep. Did it all for the nookie. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we'll jump through hoops of fire. Yeah, and do dumb things. Yeah. Sometimes it's not even for the nookie. It's just for the attention. Yeah. You know? Yeah. I mean, in particular, some of the girls that I know. The guys are just happy that they're just talking to him. Yeah. They want to be able to talk to a girl. Yeah, or in particular, a very beautiful girl. So sad. I've been there, though. It doesn't work on me. It doesn't work on you? No. So you did not give her a letter of recommendation? No, as a matter of fact, I told her, I said, I'm not comfortable writing a letter, and her email back to me was, please. It was a smiley face. I was like, really? Well, and some guys I've seen take even more extreme than Jay. They're like, extremely offended by it and like, oh, you think that just because you have boobs, you can get this and that, blah, blah, blah. Obviously, they've been jaded by a woman or two. She definitely used them as a tool. She'd walk in, put them in your face. And when Megan says that she's doing this now, are you, Megan, are you there? To Mikey? Yes, good morning. You're doing this now. You're actively doing this with someone. I guess you can say I am, yeah. How are you doing that?

59:18Well, I mean, it started off innocently enough. I used to work at Nordstrom, and this guy came in, you know, just a regular customer. I was helping him out. He actually commented on my perfume, and I said that I just use the samples because I don't have enough, you know, I didn't have time to buy a new bottle of perfume. He actually came back and had bought me the perfume. Great move. Smooth move. On both of your parts. Wow. Well, and then I realized, like, I, you know, I need some t-shirts and I really like shoes in the shoe department. So I thought I'd just test it out to see how far I can make it. Wow. Oh, my gosh. It started working out. So, you know, I haven't worked at Nordstrom for a while now, but he's still, you know, got a little shopping spree from time to time. He's still. Wait, you don't work there anymore? No, no, no, no, no. Not anymore. Wow. Well, so you guys are dating then? Cultivated. Cultivated relationship. Are you guys dating? Oh, no, no. No, we're not dating. It's just, you know. He just buys you stuff. Are you dating? Yeah. Are you returning the favor, per se? No, and that's, you know, I feel like that's the best part. Oh, wow. Is he dating anyone? Oh, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. I guess not, right? No. We'll meet for drinks or whatever, but it's not.

1:00:35No, we're not. Let me ask you this without sounding judgmental. Okay. Because I'm not being judgmental. That means you're about to be judgmental. That means he's about to be real judgmental on you. But how come that doesn't make you feel bad? Because he clearly wants it. I didn't ask him the first time it happened. He offered it. What about the second and third and fourth and fifth time? What about the 19th time? Yeah. Like I said, he initiated the original arrangement. So he was asking for it. I feel like, yeah, this is something that he wanted. I don't necessarily feel bad for it. Mike. Do you think, listen, she said, hey, he asked me, what do you want from me? He asked. She's not bullying him. No, but.

1:01:27Her answer to it is, well, look, he offered. Yeah, yeah, but I feel like, you know, guys do this all the time. When you're in a relationship or not, you try to get a little more out of the other person, I guess. You know, how many times do you say you sat on the couch and, you know, somebody, you wanted food, so you just say, hey, honey, make me a sandwich. Every day of my life. Every day of my life. So, Megan. You know, you kind of expect. Yeah, but I married my wife. Yeah, right. I married my wife. Yeah, your wife eventually kissed you. She's my wife. I made out with her. Oh, wow. Megan? What do you look like? Athletic, I guess. Yeah. Sounds amazing. How old are you? How old? Yeah, Woods is ready to start buying you stuff at Nordstrom. Yeah, how old are you? I'm 25. Oh, my gosh. 25-year-old, 5'11", blonde. Let me ask Megan, have you done this before? Not to this extent, but again, I feel like... Yeah, right. Yeah, right.

1:02:55But, like, you go to the bar and you flirt with a guy so he'll buy you a drink. Like, that's no different. I can't do it. I can't do it. Lauren doesn't. I can't because then I feel obligated to talk to him all night or else I'm a jerk. So I'd rather just get my own and look away. Oh, man. I've never been able to do it. You're spending way too much money at the bar then. I don't go to the bar. You're spending way too much money. Megan, our phone lines are blowing up and it's not really very positive. Emma and Chris is on the line. And what's going on, Chris? I'm definitely not calling to put anybody. I'm assuming, Megan, that you're of an adult age. You're over 21 or so. 25. 25. Well, there comes a point, I think, in every person's life where they realize what they're doing is wrong, despite how broken the other person is. I'm just astounded that you haven't, you know, made the right decision. Me too. Not based on his welfare, but more based on your own. Wow. I mean, I don't know how you go home and live with yourself, you know?

1:03:53buying me on the street drunk, probably going home, feeling like crap about himself, because the only way you can talk to a girl is by trying to waste his whole paycheck on one. And here's the question, too, and Chris, I wonder if you wonder this, and if anybody listening is wondering this, if this dude thinks at some point that something's going to come from this relationship. I don't know if he understands how to develop relationships, which is what makes this so wrong to me. And if the roles were reversed, and I was a woman, or if I was a man, And I met this broken woman with daddy issues, and I played on those issues to get what I wanted. I mean, I would be labeled probably one of the worst human beings on Earth. Well, I think that you would be labeled taking advantage of somebody, and I think that that would be correct. That's Megan's point, though, is that that happens all the time. But does that make it okay? No, it doesn't make it okay at all. It doesn't, no. And I'm not trying to say that I'm a saint over here. I consider him a friend, though. Like, you know, we hang out, and he just happens to my stuff. What did he consider you? And that's the problem. It's like everything that your whole point of view on this thing is incredibly selfish. You consider him a friend, but you don't sound like you're being a very good friend to him. You know, I'd sit him down and say, look, one friend to another, I think you need to work on yourself. I think you have some issues. I don't think you understand how to develop relationships. And maybe you need some help in that department. And then be a real friend.

1:05:17Teach him. Show him that he can't buy his way into people's hearts. The only problem with that, Chris, is that if she does that, then he's probably not going to take her to the Brass Plum at Nordstrom and get her three new tops. Every friendship has sacrifices, I suppose. Megan, do you think that it makes him feel... Does he have a lot of money, and are you rationalizing maybe that it makes him feel good to get you stuff that he can't afford? He does. I honestly think he feels like he's helping me. And I'm helping him by, you know, hanging out with him during the day. You know, like, I think it's a mutually beneficial arrangement, you know. Slightly like prostitution. Yes, it's very similar. I was just going to say, it's just like prostitution. I mean, it kind of sounds like that. Now, Megan. There's nothing sexual going on. But the service is rendered.

1:06:11Is there services rendered if you're fulfilling some sort of like obligation or, you know, and would you, okay, let's put it this way, Megan. Would you feel comfortable not hanging out with him if he continued to buy stuff? That would be wrong. In other words, if you didn't hang out with him after he bought you all the stuff, that would just be wrong. Or what about the other way around? If he stopped buying you stuff, would you hang out with him? Didn't she just say that she still would, but she wouldn't want to as much? Right. Not that I'm expecting him to always get me stuff. Aren't you? Yeah. But if I knew that it definitely wasn't going to happen, that I was not going to get anything out of it, then I probably wouldn't hang out with him as often. M1 Aisha from downtown. Are you there, Aisha? Is it Aisha or Alicia? Go ahead. Aisha, yeah. I definitely think she scored herself the sugar daddy. 100%. It's pretty common these days. Girls go on these websites. Not saying that she did. I know she didn't.

1:07:33There are other girls that go on websites, and they'll just look for guys that'll pay for stuff for them, and these guys are completely willing just to pay for things. Now, in fairness to Megan, Aisha, she met him when she worked at Nordstrom. Oh, yeah, of course. But, I mean, regardless of how she met him, that's what she's got on her hands right now. Yeah, sugar daddy. In fairness to Megan, she was just... browsing on sugardaddy.com. Aisha, would you have you or could you do that? No way. No way. I'm of the same mindset, but it's like I almost can't hate on the people that can because it's like... Oh, of course not. You know what I mean? I don't know. I know it's wrong. I don't hate them. I just think it's wrong. Could you have had Sugar Mama back in the day? I don't understand why it's so wrong to everyone. Megan, well, because a lot of people think that... What does he look like, by the way? Don't laugh. He laughs instantly. He's attractive? That's what she said. He's attractive. I mean, he's taller than me, which is always a bonus because that doesn't happen very often. Right. And full head of hair, good shape. I don't know. See, that makes it a little better.

1:08:50Because then, you know, I'd like to know, like, if the guy were aware, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm buying this. I don't, you know, I probably shouldn't, but it makes me feel good. Isn't he at some point going to expect? Yeah. When are you taking your clothes off? Yeah, yeah. And Megan, why not date him? If he's a good looking guy and he's got a full head of hair and... Got money and... Why wouldn't you date him? Because he's, I mean, he's a little socially awkward. Yeah. I'm clearly... out of his league. That's what she meant to say is that she's out of his league. Thank you for the call, Megan. Thank you. What a great call. Oh my gosh. She's got huge rocks to be able to admit. You are a smelly pirate hooker. Jay played that, by the way. I did not play that. I think everybody pretty much agrees. That when a much, much older guy, and I don't know how much older that guy was, but everybody pretty much agrees that when it's a much older guy and a very, very young girl, and there's anything sexual happening between the two of them, people kind of agree that that's pretty weird. But what about when it's the other way around? When we come back, I'm going to tell you about a photo shoot that just happened with Justin Bieber, who's real young, and an older female celebrity. And some real...

1:10:16Some real, I guess, controversial comments were made about it. Tell you next. I miss looking over and seeing that sweet little face. Sienna is officially on maternity leave. I think the baby will be born the 25th. I said the 22nd, and that was yesterday, so I'm wrong. I think the baby will be born Wednesday. What about you, Lauren? I said the 25th, but now you're saying it too. Yeah, I said the 25th. No, wait. Mine was two days before, and if it was the 27th, yeah, 25th. Mine was the 25th. Well, we'll see. We'll see what happens. It's a Mikey show. Welcome back to the program. A couple of things, a couple of the headlines that are out there right now. There's a bunch of miners in Chile that have been found alive, but they're saying that it...

1:11:40Could be like four months before they get them out of there. Now, instantly you're probably saying to yourself, how can they survive in there for four months? Four months. They're hoping that they can kind of clear out this area that's perforated right now and they can start sending down food and water and medicine and all that kind of stuff down to them. There's also a hurricane forming out in the Atlantic Ocean, closest city, Miami. And it's only the second hurricane of the season. Which is really a trip. What are they going to call it? Danielle. Danielle. That's right. I call it Danielle. And if you didn't hear, there was a hostage situation on a bus in the Philippines early this morning. And they think that they killed the guy that was on board this bus of tourists. And it's all under control now. What's going on in sports? Well, you may have heard that over the weekend, when Luke Piniella was the manager of the Chicago Cubs.

1:12:38And he had said, hey, listen, this season is my last season. I'm going to finish this out. The Cubs are absolutely terrible. and he just ended up quitting after the game the other day because I'm going to go ahead and take off now. I've got a sick mother, and I just need to get out of here now, and I really don't blame him. So he has retired. He's been in the game a long time. He won over 1,800 games as a manager. You know, good man, was a Yankee. I've always liked Sweet Lou, so he is retiring. He's going to go hang out with his mom. There you go. And also the Padres take on the Diamondbacks tomorrow. Rodrigo Lopez against Clayton Richards, 705 at Petco. If you haven't heard, there's sex tape allegations out there for Heidi Montag. We'll explain that in a minute. Bill O'Reilly was talking about how, we alluded to this earlier, Justin Bieber, the kid music sensation, is a pop star. He did a photo shoot with Kim Kardashian, who's, I don't know, she's older. Oh, is he, for sure.

1:13:4219 anyway so here's Bill O'Reilly on There's some pictures of Justin Bieber, 16 years old, with Kim Kardashian, who I guess is 42, I don't know. 29. Put the pictures up, please, on the screen. Okay. 16 and 29. Now, this is a magazine spread that's reminiscent of The Graduate, where Anne Bancroft and young Dustin Hoffman at the time, they had this little thing. All right. I don't care about this. Justin Bieber, he looks like Ringo Starr to me. I don't know the other one. She's in the water with a dress. What does that mean? I don't know. 20 seconds, Hoover. Does this bother you at all? Yeah, he's eating a flower. He's a prepubescent Ringo Starr. He's eating a flower. Is he a bee or what is he? What is that? No, I mean, clearly I'm not a tween enough. Do you care about this? Does it mean anything? I do. I actually, I think it's gross. It's gross. Because it's like a prepubescent 16-year-old having an affair with a celeb uton who is famous for doing nothing other than being...

1:14:44You took offense. Did you take offense? I didn't take offense of it. I mean, it's every 16-year-old male's dream. I wanted to be a baseball player. I didn't want to hang around with Kim Kardashian. You weren't into women at 16 years old? No, I wasn't. I had a baseball glove and a bat and ice skates. That's what I was doing. I will tell you this. If a 16-year-old... I had a Big Mac, a bag of burritos. A bag of burritos? Yeah, I liked my burritos in a bag. It's a whole big bag of burritos. A girl was pictured with a 29-year-old man. In any of that, there'd be big trouble. Oh, dude. Agree? He kind of brings up a decent point. If you see a 29-year-old man with a 16-year-old Taylor Swift. You can get filleted. Yeah. You get filleted. Or you get killed. Especially if it was like, oh, yeah, you know, I want you. Yeah. Right? Forget it. Wouldn't you kind of get killed? Yeah. Not kind of. He would get killed. But I mean. Haven't we all already established that that's just a double standard? That's just a double standard that our culture goes by. Sorry, Bill Maher. Yeah, I mean, if we point it out, it doesn't change it. Fact of the matter is that when it's an older woman and a younger guy, people don't really freak out about it. If it was an older guy and a younger woman, people do. I think it's because traditionally, if someone's going to force themselves upon another person sexually, it's a man because...

1:16:08He's stronger and blah, blah, blah. So I think when the guy's younger, it's like, you know, this older woman's not going to force herself. Score. Score. Yeah, good work, pal. Yeah. But now the question becomes, well, is it wrong? You know, I mean, for me, you know how I roll, I think either way it's wrong. Well, if they consummate. Yeah, if they do it. If they do it, it's rape no matter what, by the way. Yeah, exactly. Statutory rape no matter what. Right. If they were to have sex. Ha! Is that funny? No. What's the matter with you? You're going to give us a fine, man. I'm sorry. Justin Bieber's like a little girl. Yeah, he is. Yeah, the pervert alarm, man. I know. I'm trying to be the opposite of perverted. You guys, it's time for me to introduce you to my friend. He's one of my boys. This is Undane Dundutu. Say hello, Undane. He didn't say much. Hi, Undane. Welcome to America. Don't just stand there and blink at him. Say something. He's blinking furiously at me. Oh, wow. Well, say something, though. Don't just... Oh, what are you doing? He's just staring at that stapler. Have you ever seen a stapler before? Have you ever seen a... Hang on. Let me try this. Whoa. Hoyle, what is that? I'm talking to him. He doesn't understand that.

1:17:40It's a lot easier on Facebook. What language would you call that? I don't know. Swahili? Swahili is what I was going to say. I don't know what it is. I just, I went on Facebook, became friends with him, and he taught me how to do it. Come on now. Yes, it's a stapler. You know how it works? Fascinating. Let me show you. He's never had to staple anything in his life. Let me show you. L-O-B, you know what that goes? Yeah. Aborigine? Yeah. He's single. I would guess that. I take it back. Like my man. Let me show you, Ndutu. Ndutu. See how that puts the two pieces of paper together? Oh, wow. Oh, wow, he's got a smile from ear to ear. Why is he barefooted? You're just going to stand there in your green skirt and not going to say anything? Come on now. That is a very festive loincloth he's got there. It sure is. All right, Ndutu. Teach woods.

1:18:42how to cook a kangaroo. Out in the Outback, they actually have, they'll actually, the indigenous people will actually do that. That ain't no joke. He works at Outback? I believe it. He doesn't know what that is. That's a restaurant. I thought you just said he works at Outback. No, I said that's what he has in the Outback. Oh, in the Outback. Now, come on. Show me your Michael Jordan shirt I sent you. Michael Jordan? Is he going to Independence Jam with you? Yeah, he said he wants to see the wigs. Oh, man. I do, too. I do, too. That's what he came here for, right? Yeah, he came here to go to the Independence Jam. Maybe you get him some Jergens for his feet. Yeah, they're all ashy. They're definitely ashy. Gross. He ain't never worn no Air Jordans. He's never worn shoes. Never worn shoes, I bet. Well, he looks like you play bass for pretty much any band that we play on the radio here. That's 100% correct.

1:20:09Hey, Indutu, tell everybody how the tickets to the Independence Jam are available right now. If you get them, you can get that safe ride bus pass online. Independencejam.com. Tell everybody about that. How come you're getting all shy? He's so shy. He hasn't said a word. He didn't act like this at Stingaree downtown on Saturday night. You and him and Mama went to Stingaree? No, I didn't take Mama to Stingery. I took in Dootoo. We went down there, and we were picking up girls, and it was fun. Did he wear shoes? No, they don't have a sign out front that says no shirt, no shoes, no service. They let us in there, and he was dancing. What was that song you liked? Say it in my ear. Say it in my ear. He likes that Eminem Rihanna joint. He doesn't, Matt. He doesn't like that song. He doesn't like that joint. The Wayline or whatever. He was doing it in his own native language. He was singing melody and everything. Now he's all shy. Yeah. Maybe he should play that didgeridoo that he brought in. That's his, I'm assuming. That's beautiful. Wow. That's amazing. That's beautiful. And do too. And do too too. I told you that we were going to come on the air. You can't get all shy like that.

1:21:40I'm not going to take you back out to dance if you're going to act like that. Well, I'm really glad you have a friend in town finally. He's one of my boys. Did you explain to him that radio is all about, you know, audio? I don't know why I got so shy and everything. Just sitting there. You guys want to play Name That Tune? Sure. Love it. I guess so. Can he play? No, he can't. He's got to say something. He's got to say something. He's got to be able to give his name out. He can't just play a didgeridoo to ring in. All right, Jake, what do we got for a prize today for Name That Tune? All you do is pick a horse. It'll either be me or Woods or Lauren. Usually we have Sienna playing, but she's on maternity leave. She never wins anyway. Yeah, so it'll be me or Woods or Lauren. I guess I'll have to score then. Yep, the prize is Green Day tickets. Green Day tickets. Wow. It's a cricket and wireless amphitheater. Okay, cool. Okay, so give us a call right now. Green Day tickets. That's pretty good. Mm-hmm. 570-1949. You give us a call right now. And if you pick me or Woods or Lauren and we win, name that tune, we'll win for you. Now, the way that it works is real simple. It's the same concept as name that tune. So we use our name for a buzzer. And what is the theme today, Jay? Asian cover bands. Asian cover groups, yeah. Asian cover groups. Are you kidding? What does that even mean? If I understand that correctly.

1:23:05They're going to be singing regular songs. It's Asian bands that are covering regular songs. It's not necessarily bands. Some of it's just kids singing songs by a popular artist. Okay, got it. It's hilarious. And they're Asian? Are they Asian? Sometimes they are. Sometimes they're singing in English. Okay. Oh, wow. I have no idea what that means. I don't either. I'm scared to death. You should be. All right. Hang on. Get your own mic today. I know. I'm going over the other side of the board. Going into Sienna's spot. Okay. We ready? Let's do this. Here we go. Oh, Mikey. Black Eyed Peas. Wow. I just got it. That was brilliant. That was great. Here we go. Mikey, my milkshake brings the boys to the yard. My milkshake brings the boys to the yard. It's better than yours. Better than yours. Here we go. Lauren, the Lady Gaga. Really? Yeah, Woods is doing great on this one. I'm not keeping score. Are you, Lauren? Yes. Okay. Woods. Miley. Woods got that? Yeah, I love that song. You know that. Wow. Mikey.

1:24:46Lauren. Whitney Houston. Man, that was great. We got Lauren with two, Woods with one, Mikey with two. Ooh, that's a good one. Here we go. Woods. Amazing Grace. Yeah. Man. Ow. This is one of my favorites of all times. Oh gosh, oh gosh. Mikey. Jason Mraz. Yep. Yep. Yep. I know it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to post this one on the Facebook page. It is a four-year-old playing the ukulele. That's awesome. It's so cute. I've seen it. Oh, you've seen it? Yeah. I have to. Darn it. Here we go. Lauren. Oh, I know it. Hey, Jude. Yes. I've seen that one, too. It's so cute. They're all so cute. Here we go. Woods. Woods. Is that the Beatles? Yeah. That's Obla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diobla Diob Oh, we got a tie game here with three across the board. We all have three. This is it. This is the final one. Oh, my gosh. Mikey. Oh, Lauren. Kesha. Yes. Yes. Great job, Lauren. How did you guys get that so fast? Holy cow. Got my bottle of Jack. Yeah. Yeah. Good job.

1:26:18Well done. Well played. Very well played game. M1 Craig. Easy, Craig. Are you there, Craig? LLB just won for you, pal. Congratulations, buddy. Thank you. Hang on the line. You're going to go see Green Day. I'm going to go. Hang on the line. Very nice. Yeah, Craig. Should I do the egg thing? Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. I'm nervous. I'm nervous. I'm nervous. We have a dozen eggs here. Yep. Are you going to do all dozen of them? No. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Just kidding. Hey, I've got your coffee cup from this morning. I forgot my Copenhagen today, so I don't need to spit her. Do you want to put it in here? We got to clean that cup out. Can we talk about that on the break? We got to clean that out. I'm not going to drink it through that. That's good. Yeah. Just like that. We have cups in the office, but maybe we break it. Oh, wow. Let me see. Where did you get this, though, Jay? That's fine. I just brought granola in it. It was fresh granola. You're fine. It's a little plastic container. They've got stamps on them. It said their egg one's best. They've been stamped. I've never had a raw egg before. That one looks a little off. Well, I... Yeah, that's a little yellow. We were talking about it this morning. It looks a little poisoned. Shut up!

1:27:39There's something sallow about that egg. We were talking about it this morning, and I said, I believe that eggs are safe, you know, because there's just salmonella stuff out there. Because I believe that the stuff that's out there right now, you know, should be good. And I'm going to test my own theory by having a raw egg, which, by the way, I've never done. I've never had a raw egg. Disgusting. Yeah, filthy. Oh, you're going to puke. Yeah, my mouth just started to water. Oh, God. And we'll do that next. And we'll do that next. And we'll do that. I'm afraid to do this. Eat a raw egg. I would be too. I'm a delicate flower. I shouldn't be doing things like this. Let me see it. I'll crack it for you. We have to tell people to go to MikeyShow.com and look at the webcam because you're going to take it down to the house, to Chinatown. I'm Mikey. That's Woodsy. That's Lauren. Sienna's not here. She's on maternity leave and we miss her and love her. And that's Jay in the other room. Okay.

1:28:46I'm going to do this. All right. The reason that I am eating a raw egg is because, as you know, there's a salmonella outbreak out there right now with eggs. I believe that I eat eggs every day. Yep. Except for the weekends. But during the week, I have a hard-boiled egg. And we make you sit out in the hallway and eat it so you don't sync up the studio. Yeah, that's correct. Just eat by himself outside the window. And he looks in longingly at us. He peeks over the edge. Yep. We have a tiny little plastic container, and Woods is going to crack the egg in it, and then I'm going to drink it down. I've never had a raw egg before, and I'm going to do that to show the world that it's okay. There you go. Oh, wow. It's more liquid than I thought there would be. Oh, boy. Oh, that's a lot. I think you just dropped egg on the board. Holy crap. I need something to wash the... thing down. Water. You have water right there. What do you want? Chili? You want some of my yumberry? I probably will want some of your yumberry. I'll put my yumberry out here. I wonder if that's going to do the job. I was thinking like apple juice or something like that. I don't think we have apple juice. We're in a restaurant. Is that JIC? You're not in a restaurant. This is not a restaurant is what you're saying.

1:30:13So you're trying to convince me that this, in fact, is not a restaurant? We don't have chamomile back there, okay? Oh, God, he's doing it. Oh, I'm going to puke. I'm going to puke. Yeah, I'm having a hard... This sounded like a good idea. You've got to do it now. Oh, I know, because I'm a wimp if I don't. Oh, I'm going to puke. What if I don't do it? You have to. What if I don't? You have to. What if I... We'll make funny the rest of the year. 45 BBs. You'll get 45 BBs from BB King. In all honesty, how many BBs do I have to take instead? 25. Oh, wow, that's a lot of BBs. Yeah, 25 BBs in a row. Just considered it. Just considered it. Oh, for sure. I just considered it. I would take 25 over that. 25? 100%. No, more than 25. I would take 25 over that thing. You'd have to take 40 because that's how old you are. Oh, he's doing... Oh, God, oh, God. Keep your eyes closed and you can pinch your nose if you want. Okay, here it goes and Down the hatch oh gosh. Oh gosh swallow swallow it dude. Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. He's pinching his nose. He's pinching his nose. Holy crap. Did you vomit?

1:31:24Yeah, I threw it up. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. I couldn't look. Oh, my gosh. That was gross. He threw up, and now he's jumping up and down. I'm not breathing through my nose. Oh, my gosh. That was gross. Hey, sorry. My tubby said you don't want that. I'll look up. You all right, Woods? Woods might throw up, too. Anybody else want to try? Oh, gosh, no. Holy cow, no. I'll let you slam one of my head before I drink one. I don't know if I want you to eat my yum berry after you just eat it. Yeah, I'm not going to. I'm not going to dirty when you say it like that. I was Oh My god, oh my god Where's the permameter button? Where's oil when you need him? I'll eat a raw egg. Come on in. Come on in here. Dirty bird. Will he do it? Yeah, I couldn't handle it

1:32:20I couldn't do that. You held it in your mouth too long. I held it. I did. I did. I did. Yeah. You got to just take like a shot of whiskey, dude. Like an oyster shot. Not that you drink whiskey anymore. Okay, so he's going to crack the egg. Did you spit it back in here? No. No, no, no. He spit it in the thing. Okay, you got to get on camera, too, Jay. I did swallow it, though. And it came right back up. Yeah. Disgusting. It did. You got to stand. All right. Right here. Here we go. Here he goes. Oh, gosh. He's got it in his mouth. It's about to happen. Pour it in. Pour it in. It's in his mouth. It's in his mouth. I can't look. I can't look. I can't look. Oh, wow. He did it. He did it. He did it. Good. Tastes like chicken. Wow. Tastes just like chicken. Wow, Jay. Oh, dude, you are manly. Holy cow, dude. Wow. Something about the way he made his chin jut out. He gargled with it. He, like, cradled it. He is so manly. He's such a man. Ew, there's egg on my chair. There is? Yeah. Ew, gross there is. Sick. There is a little drop, I guess, of egg white. Oh, wow, that was harder than I thought. That was disgusting. That was. Oh, boy. Well, Jay has proved to the world, he's such a man, that you can...

1:33:46There are bodybuilders and, like, people listening, guys listening right now that are like, you guys are the biggest Sallys in the world because they probably do that three times a day. Dude, I'm like, oh. Oh, stop doing that. Stop doing that, please. Stop doing that. No, no, Woods, don't. No, no. I don't want to hear that. You're going to get your mic turned off. Throw up. No, no. Yeah. Oh, God. Woo. That was a tough one. Wow, good morning. Yeah, that's what I have to use as my intro. Frankie! Hey, Frankie boy. Frankie's back. Been a long time, bro. It has been a long time. Where you been? Been in Miami, dude. Miami. Kicking it down there on the beach? Yeah, down there at the university, dude. You back in school? Yeah, going to IST. What's that? Institute of Spray Tanning. You never heard of IST? No, I haven't. Wow. You're obviously joking because it's the best tanning college in America. America. What are you learning there? Just how to spray tan people? No, I'm learning how to grow pharmaceuticals. You think I'm learning there? I don't know. Learning tanning. There's a lot of opportunity. I graduated, got a 4.0. Wow. You got a job? Yeah, well, not yet, but they're giving me the opportunity to come back and be an instructor like Top Gun. If I want. If I want. Wow. If I am so inclined.

1:35:13If I decide that. Woods, maybe you could go be like a figure model or something. Like a guinea pig? You know, MC Mel Dog's looking in to see if she'd give me a job working with a cast of Jersey Shore down there in Florida. Just spray tanning them? You guys are pals now? Yeah, we're good friends. Oh, yeah, we are. Friends with benefits? Oh, yeah. We ain't friends with benefits, man. Yeah, we get the benefits. I don't get no benefits from you. Yeah, you do. Don't be shy now that you're on the microphone, Frankie boy. It ain't because I'm on a microphone. It's because you're not my type. That's not what you said last night, Frankie boy. I didn't do anything. I didn't say anything. Frankie. I didn't do anything with her. Yeah, you did. She freaks me out a little, man. She wild. Whatever. I'm proud of you, dude. I'm proud of you for following your dreams, man. the east coast understands me better than oh yeah for sure you're an east coast guy kind of a fish out of water yeah yeah and you know i thought you'd be pretty bummed man that i haven't been around for a while because we don't get to hang out and i'm considering going back dude i'm considering moving back to the east coast well i really didn't didn't even think about it much but now that you're here i'm glad you're here you're glad i'm back yeah glad you're here but if you want to move back yeah no i mean you appreciate it you can just probably go back to the east coast if you want you know what man

1:36:35Dudes like me back east that are tan are considered heroes, man. Heroes. Like gorillas and juice heads. Yeah, they're not just getting razzed by their besties, you know, like you do all the time. Oh, hey, everyone. It's time to put Frankie on the skillet so you can get roasted. The skillet? You mean the spit? Whatever, dude. You see what I mean? He's always busting my chops. I know. This is what I didn't miss about Frankie. What? You didn't miss what? You always crying about something. Yeah. You know what? I bet you missed me spotting you, though. Who's been spotting you ever since I got on? Obviously, I haven't been working out much, as you can tell. I heard you were doing P90X. Yeah, I was. I hurt my shoulder. Step up the P Frankie X, man. What's that? It's a harder workout than P90, dude. Well, P90 was kicking my butt. And you have to be tan when you do it. That's just like 12, 13 broads at a time, man. And you have to be tan, right? That's a part of the workout regimen. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't do the workout unless you're tan. Yeah. No, I'm fine.

1:37:34You get sprayed after you work out. Let's get sprayed, dude. This is disgusting. Well, you're a master sprayer now. Let's get sprayed. Yeah, man. I went to spray tent school. Listen, I'm working on getting my mobile spray license. Wow. How long did it take you to finish the courses and stuff? Like, what's the curriculum? Two months, man. That's it. Yeah. Two months. 60 days, you got your degree? Well, the first day, they weed out like 100 dudes that don't have the guts for it. There was that many dudes that want to learn how to spray tan people? Yeah, you know, the new spray tan industry is mostly guys. It ain't for effeminates. Oh. Why? Because you get to look at chicks all the time? Basically, that's the reason I got into it. It's a pretty good gig. Be able to look at the girls. Or do you just get free tanning for life if you're a spray tanner? Or both? Well, obviously, I know how to spray myself. Wow. How do you spray your back? It's a hard tough. It's a hard process, dude. It's a lot like it's a lot like rolling paint on a wall With a roller it's like scratching myself like a cat. Yeah, get someone to help you out No, no, no, no, I don't tan that's what friends are for I get my tan outside I hear the spray tan is safe, but I my bit is I don't look orange. Yeah

1:38:50You guys notice if you tan too much, you start to look orange. Orange, yeah. A little like Garfield. Yeah. Yeah, that's because a person ain't doing it right. You're getting the spray tan wrong. I'll show you. I'll show you how it works. Yeah, I'd consider it. You like to mix the different colors to try to match someone's pigment? Yeah, and then you tape the person off. You tape them? Yeah, you take masking tape, and I tape what looks like, you know, jockey underwear on you, and then I spray you. That's what you do? Can I just wear a jockey underwear? I don't think you're supposed to do that. It's no spray tan arts, man. It's the way they're doing it now. STA? Yeah, spray tan arts. Like for you, L.O.B., I would masking tape on a thong. You would? Yeah, you would put like a thong on there and make it look like you're wearing a thong. I don't want my buttcheeks orange. No, you do, man, because it ain't orange. That pressure ain't doing it right. I would do it like somebody that's putting pinstripes on. I'd tape on the thing and he'd spray it up. I don't even know if I want a tan butt. No, you do, man. That's all right. That makes my mouth water. Hey, look at this. M1 Arby Gar from Escondido. Are you there? I'm here, Mikey. What was the word of the day? Flower. That is correct. I missed it. I said...

1:40:13I didn't know if I was up to drinking the egg because I'm a delicate flower. Oh, my gosh. That's right. You did say that. That's right. I got it right past you. Wow. Got it right past you. Thank you for the call. And we got to get your information. Hang on the line. Thanks, Mikey. That's M1 Arbigar. M1 Claire from Chula Vista is on the line and says that her boyfriend tans. Are you there, Claire? Yep. Your boyfriend is a tanner? Yeah. Probably a good dude, man. Does he do the spray or does he do the beds or what does he do? He does the beds. Combination is good sometimes. You could do a combination of spray and bed. It's real good and you would know. He says that the bed gives him a more natural color. Yeah. But I would kind of disagree with that. How often does he do it? I don't think he looks natural. um he does it every day twice a day on a weekend oh my god wow is he from the east coast is he from the east coast yeah yeah he's from um well he's from like upstate new york so i don't know i think that he has i don't know i think in college he went to college in new jersey

1:41:39Should you tell me this guy tans, he tans nine times a week, basically? If he's a man, yeah. That's a lot of money. He does. Well, he has, I don't, the place that he goes, he has, like, you can pay a monthly thing and get, like, unlimited. Yeah. So, but yeah, I mean, it's still. Claire, do you tan? More than I would want to pay for it. What? Do you tan? I mean, a little bit, like. Not really in the summer. I kind of do it more just like a couple times a week in the winter just so I don't get ghostly white. Does it trip you out that your boyfriend tans more than you do? Yeah. Has he always been this way? Yeah. I think it's more severe now. Getting addicted to it. He used to work outside more. He used to do landscaping and stuff like that. So he was getting a natural tan from landscaping. Right, but now he manages an Abercrombie. Isn't it, you know... It fits, it fits, it fits. What's his boyfriend's name? Okay, no. Claire.

1:43:09Does it look fake to you? What? Does it look fake to you? Yeah, it does. I mean, I tell him he looks like an Oompa Loompa. Was he a chubby kid? Especially, what? Was he a chubby kid? Was he a chubby kid? Yeah. Actually, he was. Sometimes, like... I know this is bad, but sometimes the chubby kids that end up then becoming good looking and fit and stuff like that, they become obsessed with their image. That would be me. Listen, if I had the body, I'd probably tan. Haven't I tanned before? I don't know. Like, she's describing this guy, and I know a couple guys like this. They become, like, obsessed with working out. And then after it's the workout, then it's on to the tan, and then it's on to, like, colored contacts. GTL. Yeah. He works out a lot, too. I mean, he is, like, yeah. He's kind of. How old are you, Claire? I'm 24. How old is Ryan?

1:44:17He is 29. Okay. Jay just wrote up here that your boyfriend's name is Ryan, and I want to call him. Jay says we should call him. Absolutely. What do you want to say to him? Tell him to stop tanning. Yeah, I'm going to tell him that he's very girly. It's bad for you. I'll tell him it's bad for him. Have you seen There's Something About Mary? Yes. Yeah. You know Magda? Yeah, he looks like Magda. He's going to end up looking like that. He will. An old saddlebag. He will if he keeps doing that. That's fantastic. Like I said, it doesn't even look natural now. Mikey, where do you tan? Really? Where's your spot? Really? Where's your spot? He doesn't tan. I don't tan. I used to. I've done it. You used to tan. Woods, have you ever? Uh, it's been. Yes, that's a yes. Oh, I have before. That's a yes. Yeah, I have before. It's been 15 years. Did you wear your under- I went nude. Did you put a sock on you? I went nude. No, I went nude. Oh. I went nude. No sock? Yeah, he goes nude. No sock. He goes- He knows, like, the specific- Like, he did research on the tanning beds- Of course he did. Or the, like, tanning parlors, or whatever you want to call them, in the area. So he, like, knew which one had the kind of bed that he likes.

1:45:40Yeah. Yeah, he's a girl. Does he put the little Playboy sticker on his inner thigh? Oh, my gosh. I used to do that in high school. Oh, my gosh. Hang on a second. Hang on a second, Claire. Hang on. Get Ryan's number, Jay. That's fantastic. Amazing. That's fantastic. All right, we'll try to call him. We'll be right back. Okay. Welcome back. It's a Mikey show, which, by the way, you can call us at 570-1949. If you want to give us a call, if you want to text us, 949mikey at gmail.com. So, Jay, you can't get Ryan? I'm getting voicemail. He's probably in the tanning salon. He probably is. He's probably in the tanning bed. Literally. He's in a tanning bed, right? 830, you got to get your day going. You got to get your tan on. Yeah, get your tan on. I used to work at a tanning salon. I did, too.

1:47:15What? I did too. You did? Both of you did? Yeah. Weirdos. I know. Does that make us weirdos? Why? Or does it make us brilliant? Were there hidden cameras to look at the chat? No. But was it not a nice pool of leads? Yeah, I remember. Real sweetly? Yeah. I don't remember anything. This is exactly where you want to get hit on by the guy that works at the dating salon. Worked. Creep. Worked real good. Creep. Worked real good. Listen. Better than go in the bar. Listen, I... Needed a part-time job. Just a hard-working American. Mexican-American. All right, to be clear, Mexican, just a hard-working Mexican-American. To be more specific. To be much more specific. Are we going to let those eggs just sit here all day, or what's up with this? No, maybe we scramble them. Oh, that'd be delicious. Jay, make us a hot plate real quick. He probably has one in his truck. 570-1949 is the number. A couple of things that are happening out there.

1:48:17Apparently, there is a woman that is 101 years old that just got her third tattoo. That is disgusting. Why is it disgusting? Because it's gross. She's 101 years old. Why is that gross? Because it's gross. Because her skin's inkling? I'll tell you why. Yeah, because they had to take the skin probably and pull it to make it taut. Maybe she got it on her back and it was already taut. To make it taut. Would it be taut? On her back? It could be. There's not an area of her. Her heel is not taut anymore. You don't know that. I do know. What if she got a tramp stamp? She got a butterfly on the small of her back. That's 101. At 101 years old. Well, tattoos last forever. So in her case, forever is not going to be much longer. She's like, why not? The person should have said to her. Hey, I just want you to know, this thing, you can't take it off. You're going to have this the rest of your life. You're going to live this the rest of your life. This thing's permanent, lady, okay? These don't wash off. Oh, that's funny. Just so you know. Somebody should have told me that. Mm-hmm. L.O.B.'s got a big rooster. Yep. I actually just posted it on my Facebook like a half an hour ago. You did? If anyone knows of any tattoo removal services that have actually worked. Don't do it, kid. I'm telling you.

1:49:42Well, that's why I'm asking if any of them have worked. A lot of people wanted to say, you know who doesn't get to get a tattoo? I mean, I know that, guys. Enough with the bits. Just tell me if you know one that works. It hurts. I know it hurts. It's expensive. I don't care about the pain. I just want results. Okay. I've got a high threshold for pain. That's not what I'm worried about. Oh, boy. Tonight's 8 o'clock album, Delta Spirit, history from below. Delta Spirit. Let's see. Oh, cool. That's cool. The 8 o'clock albums this week, it's the bands that are playing at Independence Jam. That's really cool. Every night except Friday. And Friday they're doing Stevie Ray Vaughan because it's the 20th anniversary of his death. I think it's 20. I remember when it happened. You know what? In fact... This is an interesting story. The news girl that worked on... I was a producer. I was a morning show producer when he died. Wow. Was it 20 years ago? Yeah. I was a morning show producer. How crazy is that? It was 1990. Wow. I was 15. Oh, my gosh. I was 20. I was a morning show producer for the show in San Jose. And the news girl was crying because she was a big fan. She was crying.

1:51:07And I didn't know who Stevie Ray Vaughan was. I was 20. Didn't know. Speechless. Didn't know who he was. And that news girl is actually on television here in San Diego now. No way. Her name is Susan Lennon. That's awesome. And she's really good. She's always been really good. And she's on TV now. And that's what I always remember. In fact, I think I wrote her and said. You know what I'll always remember about you was when the day that Stevie Ray Vaughan died. Heidi Montag apparently has a sex tape with a girl. The reason it's in the news is because it's apparently the dude that she's with, Spencer Pratt. Yeah, they're divorcing. They're divorcing. Okay, so they're married. I don't know anything. The Hills, right? Sure. The Hills? Yes. Never seen it. We're Sienna when you need her. I know. Come on, Sienna. Mike, it's a really good show. Please. Anyway, this is a guy that works for a porn company that has been talking to Spencer about buying this alleged tape.

1:52:27No deal made. We had our initial conversation with him. Was that him? That's the guy from Vivid or whatever. To the second one. I've never spoken to her and I don't know what the relationship is between the two of them. Don't you? So I really don't know. Do we expect this to happen? Well, we certainly hope so. I think it's a... It's a video that all of America would like to see, so we'd like to be the ones... All of America? This was obviously before her breast implant. Well, like I said, I haven't seen anything. Supposedly, there's some footage from before and after, and maybe some cases from other women as well, so we'll have to see it. Oh, my gosh. He sounds like somebody that would be in the porn industry. Here's what I heard. What I heard, and it's, you know, obviously this is all speculation at this point. Really, I mean, kind of. Spencer has said, hey, I've got a tape of me and Heidi, and you're going to want this tape. America's going to want this tape. But he said it was with another girl. He has two. He has another one with one of her friends that she did. But the big one that they really want is the one of he and Heidi. That's the big one. And they said this thing, they said the initial offer is around $5 million. Oh, my gosh. But he hasn't seen. The guy's like, I haven't seen it yet. So, you know, knowing Spencer Pratt, the thing doesn't even exist.

1:53:50Wow. Knowing that idiot. What a pig. But what I read was that he's basically like, hey, sorry, it's in my possession. Oh, yeah. We're divorcing and I'm putting this thing out there, period. Well, isn't everything with them a bit? Yeah, and that's the other thing is everything with them is a bit. Nobody knows if it's real or false. Well, isn't it 50-50 if you get divorced in California? So wouldn't she get half of it even if he got it? Yeah. For sure. So maybe they're in cahoots together. Wouldn't surprise me. Roger Clemens is in a lot of trouble. Yep. He has been indicted. And they say that he perjured himself when he voluntarily went in front of Congress and said, I didn't do steroids. And so anyway, this is Roger on Fox Sports Radio talking about it. Really wasn't a surprise. I mean, I got my eyes opened up. Well, hmm.

1:55:20It's going to be about a year. That's how long it's going to take. Do you think that Roger Clemens ever thought five years ago he'd say the words, I sent it out in a tweet? In a tweet, yeah. Probably not. It sounds so not masculine. Yeah. It doesn't sound very masculine, but I do it. I tweet. I tweet too, sweetly. Tweet real sweetly. I tweet. Want to do a little bit of this? Come on, baby. Let's do some Woods of Wisdom. You got a question for Woods? Call us right now. 570-1949. He gives the guy's perspective, the guy's point of view. Yep. And so all you do is take advantage of that. You call us at 570-1949, and you can ask a question that has to do with girls, the way you dress, could have to do with anything guy-related. Maybe you have a question that is...

1:56:34sports related or something like that. You call, you ask Woodsy. Woodsy, so here's one of the emails that we got. Woodsy, I'm looking for advice to tell my wife something. She has been recently doing a lot for me. She always has to make my life easier. However, sometimes her, quote, helpful actions, unquote, although good intentioned make me, although sometimes her good helpful actions make me want to do them myself because she makes me late for work or something like that. Don't get me wrong. I'm extremely grateful for her sacrifice or service, but sometimes I wish that she would use some of that energy in other ways. Like the next time she thought of doing something for me, maybe she could surprise me with a kiss or something. And then in quotations, he puts wink, wink. Even as I write this, I feel like a total D. Am I wrong to think like that? Is there a way to tell her without making her think that I'm a complete jerk? M1 Loke. Now, here's the idea behind this. This is what he's saying. She does stuff for me. It's just not the stuff I really want. And actually, the stuff that she's doing is actually putting me behind the eight ball because I got to do it the way I want her to. Do it the way I want to do it. Do you understand that? Yeah, I do. And I think there's a way that you can do it sweetly without having to be a jerk. And there are things that you're like, hey, listen, I can...

1:58:03I got this. I can handle all these things that you're doing every day. Let me take it off your plate for you, sweetie. You know what I mean? So approach it in that regard, not of, hey, it really annoys me when you do this and then you put me, you know, then I'm late and then I have to, you know, play catch up behind, clean up your messes and things that you're doing for me. But just be sweet and just try to take that stuff off of your plate. M1 Dylan on I-5, you there? Yeah. What's your question for Woodsy? He plays in the Nava Baseball League in San Diego, yeah? Yep. You hit wood or aluminum? S-D-A-B-L. Wood. You play wood? Yeah. What age group? 28AA. Oh, really? Yeah. Do you hit aluminum or wood, Dylan? No, I play wood in North County, M-A-B-L. Because they say aluminum is kind of... That's way easier. It's way easier. But you know what the weird thing? I hit better with wood. My average is higher. I couldn't hit no matter what you put in my hands. I couldn't have a baseball in a millionaire. I wonder how slow a pitch would have to be for me. 25. 25 miles an hour? 25. 25. Yeah, for him to hit it? My gosh. I wonder if I could do...

1:59:24how high we could get the ball to go before I could stop. We'd start you off at a softball, underhand softball. Right, and now it would be an eight-year-old girl. We'd have to start with an eight-year-old girl pitching underhand softball. Well, they have underhand softball in the cages. Yeah. So we can go to the cages. Yeah, you can go in there and hit. I would love to. Let's go. Yeah, as soon as I'm done with surgery. As soon as you guys finish hitting some golf balls and watching Dumb and Dumber. All the things you say you're going to do. Yeah, then I'll do it. Big talkers. All right, Woodsy. Woodsy, my wife says she wants to move out of San Diego because of blah, blah, blah. But I think that she's just not happy with herself and needs to make herself happy versus blaming the area, the weather, etc. Oh, and I'm afraid of her because when she's upset, my life sucks. M1, I can't tell you my name, dude. That's funny. So. What's his question? I think his question is. What do you do if you're in a situation where your wife is always blaming everything that's going on on the things that don't really matter? It's not the weather in Sandy. She's saying, oh, the weather here. I don't like the weather. I don't like this. I don't like that. What do you do in a situation like that? Here's the deal. She doesn't like this place. There's not going to be too many places that she's going to be really happy.

2:00:45Pretty great place to live, man. You know, the old saying is happy wife, happy life. But I don't think necessarily in this case. It sounds like she's just complaining just to complain. So I'd just tell her to get it. No. She's not complaining just to complain. I'd say, you know what? She's not happy. If you're not happy, see you. No. See you later, pal. To your wife? Yeah. What happened to Team Woods? She's complaining for no reason, though. Maybe she's depressed. Everything's all good. Well, maybe go get on Prozac. Well, support her and tell her to do that. Okay, go get on Prozac. You can't tell her to get. You'd walk up to her you just go hey go get them frozen. Hey, you're gonna find out what the root of it. It's a quit crying because wherever you go there you are So find out you know do some digging I would say it sounds like she needs a conversation in paradise and you hear me because my life is miserable when she's up well then Come converse hash it out. Yeah Yeah, it woods is right if you're not gonna be happy living in San Diego. We're gonna be happy. I know plenty of people that don't like

2:01:42Living in San Diego. They think they're crazy, but they don't like it for one reason or another. How about this one? Woods, I've been on three dates with this guy. The most recent, he cooked me dinner. I have not, quote, given up the cookie. Don't say that. I have always been told by my guy friends that if a guy really likes a girl, he would make an effort to see her as much as possible. If I'm only seeing him about once a week, is that a sign that he's really not interested in a relationship? M1, do legal. No, not at all. I mean, the guy's probably pretty busy. You know, possibly busy. I mean, he likes you. You've been on three dates. You know, he's cooked for you. I mean, this guy's, you know, yeah, he's probably trying to sleep with you, but he is a guy after all. But no, it doesn't mean he doesn't want a relationship. It just means he's a busy working man. I mean, with our schedule, that's the thing for me, like being out in the dating world again. With our schedule, I'd be lucky to see a guy like once a week, you know? You'd have to find a guy that could take you to dinner at four. I know. You know what I mean? Yeah. You know, if I dated a guy that was busy too, it's like once a week. It'd be tough. M1, Ginger from PB, you there? Yep, I'm here. Go ahead. So my boyfriend and I broke up a few months ago because I found out he was cheating on me.

2:03:03We're back together now, and I'm getting a little suspicious, and I just don't know how to go about it. How old are you, Ginger? 21. Well, here's the deal. Your suspicions are probably accurate. I mean, the guy's done it before. I'm not going to say once a cheater, always a cheater. Because it's true. But they're young. They're young. Is he young, too? He's actually 25. He's 25. He's young. God, I was just an idiot when I was that age. Hey, Ginger, what made you take him back? He just seemed really sincere that he wanted to change. We took a break. We just started off really slow again and just went on little dates. And I don't know, we just are really compatible in many ways. So I thought it could work. I don't know if you ever heard my take on that. But my take is the way that you see people can say whatever they want. But until you actually see the change, you shouldn't do anything. And what I mean by that is if me and you, Ginger, are walking through. a jungle and we see a tree and I look up at the tree and I go, that's a beautiful tree. I think it's a banana tree. We're not going to know if it's a banana tree until I pull the branches and the leaves to the side and I actually see a bunch of bananas. Until I actually see bananas, I have no idea. All it is is a pretty tree that's saying it's a banana tree. But until I actually see bananas, I'm not going to be convinced it's a banana tree. Hey, Ginger, why are you suspicious again? What's happened? It's hard to get into trust.

2:04:32I was going to say, how do you rebuild trust, Mike? How do you get that? That is a fundamental thing of a relationship. And if you don't have that, then you don't have a good relationship. So how do you rebuild it? Here's what I would say with that. Ginger, when you, did you find out, did you discover that he was cheating? It got so bad that I created a persona for myself and was talking to him, pretending I was someone else, and actually met up with him and caught it in myself. Holy cow. Yeah, it was pretty bad. Holy cow. Holy cow. Oh, my gosh. My heart hurts. Listen. Listen. Okay. Holy cow. Let me answer LOB's question. Whatever got you. to the point that you decided that you needed to do that, Ginger? Because there was stuff that was going on that made you go, hmm, you know, something's going on. Whatever those... All his emails before, when we first broke up, random emails, I brought it up to him, and that's when we broke up the first time. About six months later, we started dating, and then I was still suspicious, so I did that on my own. So here's my answer to LOB's question, because LOB asks a great question.

2:06:00LLB, by the way, pounding her forehead with the palm of her hand. But here's the deal, Ginger. Whatever the stuff was that was making you suspicious in the first place shouldn't exist anymore. And if it still does, that's an indication that you're not seeing bananas. So the way that you see bananas and know that somebody's actually walking what they're talking is that you don't see any more evidence of Bad behavior. The stuff that used to be there and there anymore. I've been cheated on before and I was suspicious before I found out. And there were things that were happening that were making me suspicious. Now, I took this girl back. We were dating and things were pretty cool. And then after a little time went by, some of that stuff started to kind of, huh, that's weird. Huh, that's weird. And, you know, that's the deal. You know, so. When somebody's changed, their behavior shows it. But his behavior has always been the same, which is what is so hard. Yeah, but something keyed you off. Something keyed you off, though, Ginger. Something got you to the point where you were going to go on Craigslist and pretend to be somebody. You know, something got you there. There were things that were making you. It's because I checked his emails, so do I have to go and check his emails and be... I feel like that's... Well, you've got to remember this, Ginger, that, first of all...

2:07:26If the guy's got any brains in his head, whatever way he got caught the first time, he's going to make bulletproof the second time. So that's number one. But number two, if you're getting to the point where you need to do that, it's an indication that something is wrong. Yep. And third. You don't want to live like that. No. Third, you can always forgive somebody, but trust and you're never going to forget it. And trust is something that's earned. It's like a bank account. And so every single day, I'm putting money into the bank account of trust with my wife, Rebecca. Every day with my behavior and what I do, I'm putting trust into that bank account. If I cheat on her, I empty the bank account and, in effect, put it into the red. And if she ever decided, oh, okay, well, I'm going to trust you again, it means that that bank account has to come out of the red into the black and start, you know, I got to start building on it again. Absolutely. So, anyway, thank you for the call. Good luck, sweetie. Poor girl. That's brutal, man. Oh, man, that just made me sad. Did you guys know that Wyclef Jean is being told that he can't run for president of Haiti? Wow. We'll tell you why. I so wish I knew what that hat is called that Woodsy is wearing. Paperboy hat. Yeah, I mean, it kind of looks like you're working the long shore docks, you know? My wife was like, oh, oh, that's...

2:10:17Okay, you're gonna get that she's giving you a hard time a little bit and then after about half an hour She'd look over and she's like I really like that on you. That's cool a newsboy hat newsboy newsboy Yeah, just googled it newsboy looks great. You are newsboy because you're filling in for Seattle girl. There you go I'm Mikey the guy in the newsboy had his woods The blonde girl that'll be in the new OnStar commercial pretty soon is sitting over there to my right. How about that? Lauren filmed an OnStar commercial. Wow. It's pretty cool. It was cool because I never knew that they did, when you're driving in a movie or a show or whatever, they put the car on a low flatbed trailer. Really? And then film it that way. Really? I never knew. Oh, that's cool. Yeah. Did you have any lines? The first one, I didn't have any lines. And then I did a second one where we just had to improv. No. And I was like doing bits. In a car? Yeah. Really? What kind of bits? We were talking about how now the newest thing that OnStar will have is there's going to be a button you can push and you can update your Facebook while you're driving. Are you kidding? Yeah, I know. That's what the commercial was for. What? So, yeah. Holy cow. I know. OnStar is freaking great. It is. We locked our keys in the car at the airport one time.

2:11:39And we were like, oh, just completely spun out. And Jamie's like, oh, we have OnStar. Five minutes later, the car was unlocked. They unlocked it. It was dynamite. And I got to ride in two different cars that had it. One of them was this small little Cadillac SUV that was just, oh, man. I don't know what it was called, but it was cool. Really? Mm-hmm. OnStar is cool. Mm-hmm. The world is going to get to a point where we don't have any wires. We had Ian over at the house on Friday, and he was looking at the back of our entertainment system. Ian is the guy that does all your... Yeah, he does all my audio video stuff. And he came over and he was looking at it, and I was looking at the wires. And it looked like there's so many wires. Yeah, I hate wires. I do too. I thought to myself, what can I imagine that would be great in... Ten years. And you know what it would look like? You will have all these components, DVD players, all that stuff, and they won't plug into the wall. Okay? They'll just run. And you won't have to put them near the TV even if you don't want to. You can put them in the closet. Yeah. They can be wherever you want them to be and they'll run from wherever they are without wires. Wireless. Wireless. Wirelessly. Wirelessly. I've always pictured like a big magnet on your wall.

2:13:05And you take your new big flat screen TV and you just right on the magnet. That's rad. And it just stands there. It just stays there. Yes. You don't have to plug it in. It just runs. And then you peel the magnet off the wall like a sticky nut. Yeah, when you're done. And the magnet has all the charging information, the Bluetooth information, everything you need. How rad is that? And an engineer told me that you could just get one like a poster that would just roll out. A TV? A TV that would just roll out. Oh, my God. That would be so great. You could do your whole wall, just strip the posters, and it's like all sorts of boom, giant TV. I have no doubt that it'll be there someday. Because think about, I remember the TV I had in college. The big, it was like a big screen. Like an anchor. The big tube behind it, and you took four dudes to carry it. Yeah. Now my wife is running around picking up flat screens over her head. My TV is still the big old one that turns on and off on its own. Are you serious? I can't pick it up. It has a record player attached to it. Yeah. And an 8-track. And an 8-track. Bunny ears off the back. VCR with foil on top of the antenna. So Wyclef Jean was going to run for president of Haiti because he's from there. He obviously feels really strongly about Haiti. And I guess word on the street is that Haiti is telling him that he can't. Right. That he's not allowed to run. And I don't know. It's turned into kind of a thing.

2:14:25By the way, I wanted to let people know that I'm going to be going to Haiti for a couple of days in November. That's awesome, dude. With an organization called Outside the Bowl. And what they do is they go there, they build kitchens, and they can feed up to a million kids a year. What are you going to be doing exactly? Are you going to be building? I'm going to go there with my brother, and we are going to document what these kitchens do. And we're going to show these kids and the need that there is. We'll come back. My brother does those amazing videos. Incredible. Really incredible videos. He's going to put a video together. We'll put it on MikeyShow.com. And hopefully, if people want to, they can make a donation to build these kitchens. You know, they build those kitchens, man. And once they're there and they're in place, they take care of themselves. It doesn't require people to continue to pour money into them. Once that they cost a hundred grand. Yeah. Once they're built and they're in place, they run themselves. They've already done one in South Africa. They're sustainable. And they've already done one in South Africa. They got one on deck to build in Cabo San Lucas. And, you know, everybody knows what's going on in Haiti. And, you know, I just I saw some stuff.

2:15:53from outside the pool on these kids. And it's, it's one of those deals where I got a, uh, I have a three-year-old about to turn four and I have a twin boys that just turned a year old. And I just think about kids, uh, so much differently. And, and, and I, and I think you can't help but imagine what if my kid was hungry. Nate, you know, they say that these kids, when they come to the, um, When they come to these places to get fed, these little kids will take two liter bottles of Pepsi and cut them in half. And they'll bring that with them to put the soup in. They'll bring ashtrays for people to put the soup in. And, you know, it's just it's something that means a lot to me. And it's new. It's a new thing for me. If you would have asked me five years ago. if this was going to be a part of something that I really felt strongly about, I would have said no. Because at the time, that wasn't something that God had put in my heart. I'm proud of you, dude. That's a big thing to do, man. I read an article at Wyclef. They did an interview with him in Rolling Stone. And he, you know, obviously the way he feels about his homeland is very, very sincere. And, you know, he's running against a lot of other guys, including one of the guys is his uncle.

2:17:19Oh, no way. Yeah, he's running against his uncle. Wow. Which is weird. But if they let him run, and I don't know if they're going to. Yeah, they said right now he's ineligible. Because he's not a resident, I think is what the deal was. So he's not on the list of candidates right now. The 19 candidates on the list right now. And he says he's going to keep fighting it. And he wants to be in there. I have a feeling if worst case scenario, they don't let him. run, I think he'll still be pretty instrumental. Oops. Sorry about that. Yeah, yeah, no, I think you're right. I think you're right. I think you will, too. But, I mean, this is what we do know. The guy wants to change Haiti. Yeah, he does. And I think he will, like I said, be instrumental in the change. Mm-hmm. Would you buy, you ever bought anything from TV from an infomercial? Really? P90X. Hello. P90X. Yeah, I dropped three bills on that bad boy. $300? Yeah, it's sitting and gathering dust in my corner. That's how much it costs? Yeah, well, with all the goods we got with it. Oh, wow. Oh, my gosh. Well, I'm getting back on it, though, soon. As soon as my shoulder heals. Yeah. As far as you know. As soon as you guys watch Dumb and Dumber. As far as you know. Go hit golf balls. Is it the only thing that you've bought from TV? I bought Girls Gone Wild DVD. Take some.

2:18:43It takes a brave man to admit something so disgusting. Yeah. Yeah, it's true. And what I didn't realize about that is that, because you see one, it's late. Maybe you've been out, you've had a few cocktails. You get home, you're like, wow, it looks pretty cool. You're like, I want to see it. I want to see it. They blacked it out. Yeah. So I ordered it, and then I got one every month. And they would charge your card. They charge your card. And I was like, hey, I don't want any more of these. I've done that. Yep. I have bought so many, so many television things. Call us, by the way, 570-1949. What's the worst thing you bought or the best thing? I want to know what the great stuff that you bought from an infomercial. Well, first of all, I will start it by saying that most of the things that I've bought from television are good and work and blah, blah, blah. But the thing here is, what have you bought? from TV that was a complete waste of time and that you didn't use anymore. Okay, so I can tell you that I have a Ron Popeil rotisserie oven sitting in my garage right now. We won't have time to go over everything that you bought and use from an environment. Ron Popeil? Yes, the Ron Popeil said it and forget it. All I know is that when it first came out, I had to make rotisserie chicken in the comfort of my own home.

2:20:06And I did. Once. Once. Was it delicious? Yeah. I could be a crackhead. How was it? Oh, it was delicious. Dude. So what's your bit? Make it again. Maybe I make it again. Maybe I'll bring out the wrong puppy. Oh, great product. How long does it take to cook? I don't know, like an hour or something? Bring it in. We'll do it on the air. Yeah, let's make a chicken in here. I'll do it. I'll do the heartbeat. Oh, yeah. Hey, listen. It was a great product. I made, like, really? $455 for a rotisserie? I don't know. It wasn't that much. When we get in the new studio, we need to have Ron Popeil set it and forget it. It'll be Ron Popeil Tuesdays. Oh, yeah. That's amazing. Yeah, I did it. We'll just leave it in there. I've bought that. I bought OxyClean. Oh, I did too. I bought OxyClean. Yeah, I bought it on TV when it first came out. I bought it in the stores. I was always a sucker for the as-seen-on-TV section in the store, not the stuff on TV. I bought that too. OxyClean I bought because I used to have an apartment with crap all over the floor. Like, not crap, but it was, you know, it was in college. Stained, you know? Yeah. And dude, that stuff didn't work a lick. No. Well, OxyClean's awesome. It didn't work for me. We saw a new product on TV last week called the Snazzy Napper.

2:21:19Oh, yeah. It looks awesome. By awesome, you mean it looks like a terrorist mask. It does. Yeah, it looks like a terrorist mask. It's a blanket with a bunch of Zs on it for sleep that you put over your head and it has slits for your nose and mouth so you can breathe. I get freezing on the plane. It looks like somebody's robbing a bank. You can't wear that through security. No. M1 Chris from San Diego, you there? What's going on? Oh, my gosh. Holy cow. It gets worse. I've been on it about three times. It's been in my house for three years. Is it good? You know, it is. See, I was just kind of like, I wanted to be like Jay. I wanted to get back into rock climbing and all my outdoor stuff. I'm like, I'm going to get that 20 pounds off and jump back into it.

2:22:18Dude, all I can tell you is that those products look awesome. When I see that dude that's all ripped and cut on the Bowflex commercial. Yeah, and knowing that guy, the only time he's ever been on a Bowflex is that day of making that commercial. We are such suckers, man. stupid with that. It gets worse. Financed it. I mean, I think I should get the issue. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. You're probably the winner. You're the only person I've ever talked to that actually has bought a Bowflex. A Bowflex? Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Hey, I'm not going to sit here and say I haven't thought about it. Oh, I've thought about it. I've thought about it a lot. My dad was the king of the ab things that you could buy online. We had... Yeah, I bought one of two. I bought the one that you...

2:23:19Push in. It's the stupidest thing. You take it and go like that and you think you're going to get abs. How many times did you use it? I used it a lot. You still use it? No, it never did anything. It looks like a bow and arrow type thing. It looks like the bow. And it didn't do anything for you? No. How could it? We had the one that looked like a sled. and it had like a tilted edge, and you put your hands in a little slot, and you rock. It was like the ab rocker, I think it was called. Oh, yeah. And so we had that. We had the ab cruncher. My dad was really into abs, I guess. My mom was always on QVC, her home shopping club. Chris, what were you saying? No, I think the one that Woodsy described, I think that's the one I had. Is it blue? Ab thing that you're describing? Yeah, is it blue? I don't really remember. It was, you know, a while back. Yeah, it's been a while. Yeah, I think mine was black. Hey, where's your Bowflex sitting right now? It's set up. I'm looking at it right now in my bedroom. That's so great. You know, conveniently, it slides right under the bed. Yes, it sure does. Pack it right up. For $3,500, it should make you a cup of coffee. Absolutely. I know. It's angled towards the TV. Hey, that'll inspire me. I'll put on some kind of workout thing. And, you know, no, it just never happened. I agree, dude. And I've just realized that I am not a workout at home kind of guy. If I'm going to work out, I have to go to a gym. I just can't do it in my home. I hate it.

2:24:40Thank you, man. Appreciate it, Chris. Your house smells like a gym. Yeah, it sucks. Working out sucks anyway. Well, like if you had to go to a gym, it would make a difference. Yeah, you know, before I moved here, I was going to the gym probably four days, five days a week and was loving it. I was having a ball, was losing weight, was feeling better. And I just, I liked that feeling of going to the gym. I used to go to my lunch hour every day. I don't like not being able to change temperature because if you work out in your house and it's 75 degrees in your house or whatever and you're done working out. You're just sitting there in that same hotness. When you go into a gym, you leave. You go outside, and maybe if it's warm, you get in your car, there's air conditioning, you change climate. In your house, you don't change climate. Unless you have a designated gym, and then you can turn the air up. Yeah, if you've got a space in your house for that. If you have that. Let's see. M1 Jason, are you there? Hi, Jason. Good. What did you get? All right, so I've got to set the story here. I wake up in the morning. And after a night of drinking, of course, and there is my credit card out with a confirmation number. And, of course, the television is on on the home shopping network. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. So my curiosity is now peaked. I call the number, give them the confirmation number and everything. And they're like, yeah, you at 4.08 a.m. purchased the complete set.

2:26:10of Jaw Dropper's magic capes. Magic what? Oh my gosh. Magic what? Magic tape. Yeah, teach him how to be a magician. How to be a magician. Holy... Jason, did you cancel or did you let it come in the mail? Oh, yeah, you needed it immediately. Yeah, you needed to know how to pull a rabbit out of a hat tomorrow. Absolutely. He was probably like, I got to check that way. Yeah, where are my options in terms of shipping it? Because I need my magic tomorrow. The worthless thing I have ever purchased. Oh, my God. I love how he was responsible enough to write down the confirmation. How much? How much? How much? Hey, Jason, is your wife M1 cave dweller? No, that's a man. Got it. Got it. It says his wife. He got his wife. Maybe Cave Dweller got his wife on TV. Thank you, Jason. We appreciate the phone call. My pleasure. Thank you, bro. That's hysterical. Holy cow. That's so great. There's a real popular brand of bread that's been recalled.

2:27:37You may have it in your kitchen right now. We'll tell you what it is when we get back. Hey, Independence Jam is going to have something called Safe Ride Bus Passes that you can get online if you go to IndependenceJam.com. Goes the day of the show. Goes from the Tipsy Crow downtown, Miller's Field, McGregor's in Mission Valley. Pretty cool. Tickets are $43. That includes a ticket to the concert, but, I mean, when you think about it, It's a DD for you. That's awesome. It's huge if you're coming from down south. Mm-hmm. Now, seats are limited. So, you know, you got to try to get on this as quickly as you can. FM 94.9 Independence Jam Coastal Invasion 2010. I know. I'm resisting. I know. I'm resisting. Trying to show you the fruit of my tree, pal, okay? Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros, Rogue Wave, the Wigs, Delta Spirit, and...

2:29:08You're going to have a cool local stage, too. It's going to be a great show. I'm going to be there. I'll be there. Woods is going to be there. Jay's going to be there. Mike's going to be recovering. That's right. Sienna might be in labor. That's right. Or have a baby already. I'll be in full costume, but I'll be there. You're going to be in costume? Harry Potter? Yeah. Yeah, that'd be cool. I'm going to dress as Stormtrooper. I'm going to dress as Edward Sharp, and I'm just going to whistle the whole time. That's awesome. By the way, Jared is our graphic design guy that did our... He did our bumper stickers. He did our website. He did my business cards. And if you want to work with Jared to do any of that kind of stuff for you, go to createyourdesignonline.com. Incredible, incredible graphic designer. Could be working in Hollywood doing Hollywood movie posters and is literally one of the most talented dudes I've ever met. And he can do a... business card starter package for you for $150 where it'll be the logo design, business card design, a thousand business cards. It's pretty awesome. He's dynamite. He really is. He's coming to my house this week to do our, he's going to do our adoption pamphlet. That's so cool. What is that, by the way? Basically what happens is, so there's birth mothers all over the country. And so what Jamie and I will do is we'll put together like a little, it's front.

2:30:32Turn the page. It's like four pages, basically. And it's pictures. I write something about Jamie. Jamie writes something about me. We put another thing on the front, and it's just pictures. And he's going to have it all done up sweetly. So that the person can maybe pick you guys and go, I want you. Yeah, it's your storefront. You've got to make sure it's legit and make sure it's a true depiction of you. Absolutely. Tell that story about what happened in Venice Beach. Well, actually, we went to... What was it in Santa Monica? It was on Santa Monica Pier. You guys ever been to the pier? In Santa Monica. So they have this ice cream shop inside. It's actually an ice cream shoppy because it's got the E on the end of it. Two P's and an E. Yeah, ye olde ice cream shoppy. So we go sit down and we're going to get some ice cream. And I've never heard anything like this before. And Jamie and I were sitting there. And this kid is behind the counter and he's like taking everybody's order. The lady walks up, and she goes, excuse me? And he's like, yes, ma'am, may I help you? And she goes, why does it smell horses in here? Why does it smell horses in here? Why does it smell horses in here? Why does it smell horses in here? And I go, I look over, and Jamie looked immediately. I mean, we've been together so long, she, like, read my mind. She goes, did she just? I go, yeah. I go, shh, listen. And the guy goes, excuse me? And she goes,

2:31:53Why does it smell horses in here? She said it twice. Exactly. Why does it smell like horses? Yeah, she didn't say like. And I'm like, is this? I started flipping out. Is she British? No. And I kept repeating it. Jamie, I go, why does it smell feed in here? Why does it smell pizza in here? But wait, there's another important question of why did the ice cream plate smell like horses? It didn't. It didn't. There's a giant carousel in there, like a giant thing. And then there's a little ice cream shop off to the side. But her walking up and saying, why does it smell horse in here? I almost fell out of my chair. I not know. Is there any explanation for it? No. What did the guy say? He goes, why does it what? And that's when she goes, why does it smell horses in here? What did he say? He goes, I don't know what you're talking about. He goes, I'm used to it. If it does. I mean, we were like, I had my mouth open. For the rest of the day, I was like, I'm walking around. I just go, why does it smell horses? Why does it smell Mikey in here? You know, that's one of those. It does smell Mikey in here. It does smell Mikey in here. Why does it smell Jay in here? Isn't that weird? I can tell you why. Somebody said, or I hear it. Sienna says it. I think you say it. Man versus wild. I say that. I don't say verse. I say versus. Versus.

2:33:20But I've learned to say versus. I'm not a clown. What? I heard it. I say it, and you guys made fun of me. I heard it on SportsCenter the other day, too. Oh, really? Yeah. A guy on SportsCenter goes, he was talking about a football game coming up, and he was like, yeah, you know, 49ers versus. And I was like, is that, like, the new thing? I believe that it's versus is correct. But verse is just a lazy man's way of saying it. Is it? Because Padres verse the pirates? Yes. Verses. Like, I heard. I would have said verse for the rest of my life if you guys hadn't corrected me. Heard Sienna say it. Heard L.O.B. say it. Heard a guy on SportsCenter say it. And I was like, is this like the new hip thing and I just don't know it? Well, I used to. I'm wondering if it's a regional thing. And it wouldn't make sense if me and Sienna both say it because we're from opposite ends of the country. Done it your whole life though, right? Yeah. Always. And then. I also say, I got this pointed out to me in college, I would say, oh, yeah, I'll take another one because I'm done my beer. I'm done my beer? I'm done my beer. LLB, that's just like this lady. It should be I'm done with my beer. Why does it smell horse in here? No, it's different though. I'm done my beer.

2:34:32No, you're missing the word with. But I'm done. You're seven years old, you get away with that. L-O-B. You're done with it. You're missing a word. That's the weirdest thing ever. It's the same thing as finished, though. I finished my beer. You can replace finished with done. I'm done my beer. I'm done my beer. It's like when you're a kid and you push yourself away from the table and your mom's like, you know, are you still eating? No, I'm done. It's the same thing as I'm finished, right? Not if you leave the word done out. What do you mean? I'm done. No, I'm eating. No, I'm done. I'm done. But I'm done my beer. You could say I'm finished my beer. No, you couldn't. You would say I'm finished with my beer. Yeah, you would. Oh, that's the strangest thing I've ever heard. I'm finished my beer. No, you can't say it. Yes, it's crazy. Is there an explanation? No. I don't know. We went around the room and it was kind of like two out of eight. said, I'm done my beer. I don't know. Maybe that was a weird statistic. I don't know where I came from. That's statistic. That's the weirdest. Every time I finish a drink now, I'm done my Dr. Pepper. Oh, I'm done my fried rice. Weird. 5701949. If you have those. Your mind is blown. I was all day. I'm like, why does it smell pizza in here? Why does it smell candy in here?

2:35:53Why does it smell ice cream in here? All day. Like, you could use it if it was an adverb, right? Why does it smell fishy in here? Yes, you could say... Or an adjective. Is that an adverb or an adjective? That's an adjective. Yeah, you could say fishy. You could say, why does it smell crappy in here? Why does it smell farty in here? So she just was using horse as an... You would never say, why does it smell fish in here? Yeah. It's weird. She was using horse as an adjective. 5701949. I was blown away. To say the least. It's still, my brain's like, I don't get it. I'm not processing this. That's funny. And people can call us if you have those. 570-1949. If you do those weird, if you have some weird saying. I've done my beer. I've never heard you do that in here, by the way. Well, I don't drink beer in here. No. Is it specific just for beer? No, it's like when I finish with like, oh, I'm done my Jamba Juice. No way. Never heard I do it. I'd look at you like you have a screw loose. I probably said it and you guys haven't noticed. I haven't noticed it. I say weird pronunciations because I'm from the East Coast that you guys usually notice. Point out. Make fun of. It's really nice. It's horrible. It's horrible. It's horrible in there. By the way, the egg recall is up to 550 million eggs recalled. Half a billion. How are you guys feeling? I feel fine after my half-eaten raw egg. How do you feel, Jay? I feel fine.

2:37:17Feels fine. Hang on for the next 5 to 72 hours. Yeah. I can't eat after 11 p.m. tonight. It's really going to spoil my 2 a.m. feeding. I have to have surgery tomorrow. You're a baby. I know it. With your adult head. Should I post that video of my son? Please do. My one-year-old. It's the cutest thing. pooping i said to my last night my one-year-old my two twin boys were sitting in their high chairs and one of them was pooping and i said to my wife i go i think that's funny no matter what culture you are i said you could be sitting in zambia

2:38:03And you could be in a tribe in Zambia, and if there is a one-year-old baby in Zambia pooping in his loincloth, they are sitting around that fire laughing their heads off. Dying. It is so raw to watch, because my five-month-old niece, she's got a whole bit that she does when she goes, and she'll go, and say stuff, and then look at us all crooked. It's so funny. Yours is hysterical. It's so funny. Oh, here's one. M1 Renee. Are you there, Renee? Yeah, I'm here. What do you say? I work with kids, and what they say all the time is, look it. Look it. Yeah, look at that. Instead of, look at this, look it. Look it. I still say that. I say, look it. I say, gunna. G-O-N-N-A. I'll say that in a fight. Like, look it. I'll be like, look it. If you're arguing with somebody? Yeah, if I'm arguing with somebody. Look it. It's a bit redneck if you do that, isn't it? It is a little redneck. Look it. I've been doing this all morning. Yeah, look it.

2:39:01This is what I do for a living. Yes. Get. Wow. I guess I do say that. What if there's words we say only when we argue? You always say stalled. Yeah, I do. Stalled. It's stole. Stalled. Yeah. Is it? What's correct? Stole. It's stole. Stole is correct. Yes. I'll never figure that one out. You say here's the deal. Is that what you say when you fight? Look, here's the deal. Here's the deal. I say it all the time. Here's the deal. Let's see. In other words. Oh, you know what people have not heard? And we'll do it when we come back. Time to break, right? That's, yes. When we come back, I'm going to give you the, there's a brand new urban survivor. Urban. A brand new urban survivor with Mikey Grylls trying to survive somewhere out in the wild. So we'll play that for you when we come back. Don't forget tonight's 8 o'clock album, Delta Spirit. History from Below. Ladies and gentlemen, I have an announcement tonight. General admission tickets for Independence Jam are sold out. Yeah, baby. Yeah, baby.

2:40:39In fact, all you can get now are the safe ride bus passes. So if you want those, go online, independencejam.com, and get your hands on those suckers, and consider yourself lucky, because general admission, sold out for Independence Jam. Very, very cool. I said earlier that there was this brand of bread that had been recalled, and which one was it? It's Milton's. It's for their, it's Milton's, um... Multigrain, which we eat and it's real good. That's my jam. Hello, boo. That is my jam. Now, hang on. I wouldn't be caught dead near multigrain bread. No, it's nothing that's bad. What it is is that they use milk and they didn't list it. Oh. And so people need to know in case they have allergies. Yeah, that kind of deal. That fake bit. So, no, that is a very real bit. But they're recalling it. 5,000 to 10,000 loaves.

2:41:42From northern and central California, Arizona, Nevada. That's a word I hate, by the way, Mike. What? Loaf. Loaf. Loaf is an awful, awful word. Loaf. Loaf. How about meat? Loaf. A loaf of meat. You know what's not, though, is loaves. Loaves is okay. Loaves sounds lovely. So anyway, you need to know that. Loaf. Loaf. Wolf. Did you guys? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I sent it to you. Did you watch the thing that I sent you about Al Roker? Yeah, yeah. It was sad. It was sad. I was sad. No, it's sad, but it's also, it was one of those deals where, oh my gosh, Al. Oh my gosh, Al. Oh my gosh, Al. Al Roker. He was pretty quick on his feet, though. Yeah. Al Roker. It's the only time Al Roker's ever been quick on his feet, by the way. He's out in the plaza area outside doing, you know, weather. And all these people are standing out there and they got their signs and everything and they're holding their signs up and hi from, you know. Kentucky. Kentucky. Exactly. And there's this girl standing there and he walks up to the girl with his microphone and he's like, hey, what's your name? She's like, you know, Gladys, whatever her name is. Gladys. And he says, how old is your brother?

2:43:01And there's just a stunned look on both of their faces. And he goes, and the little girl goes, that's my sister. And he goes, ah, you got the short hair there, don't you? All right. Well, let's, uh, what else is happening around your neck of the woods? Oh my gosh. Holy cow. You have to be like, if you're not sure, just be like. And what's your name? He for sure thought it was a boy. 100%. She looks like a little boy, though, too. To me, she didn't really look like a little boy that much to me, necessarily. No, not much, no. Put it on the fan page. It's tough now, because little girls are cutting their hair short again, and boys are going their hair long, so if you're not sure, just ask, like you said. What's your name? That's the thing. I don't think he wasn't sure. In his mind, that was a... He was sure. Yeah, he was sure it was a boy. Yeah, so he was just sure. I don't think he was like, huh, you know, I'm not sure. He thought it was a boy. He even says, maybe I should ask some people if they're pregnant as well. Yeah. It's one of those days, and how's the weather today, Jam? Oh, man. Sorry about that little girl. Poor thing. Poor thing. I know. All of her friends are going to be like, ah, look at you. Al Ruger thought you were a boy. Oh, man.

2:44:15Let's see. Oh, so the Urban Survivor. We have a brand new episode. I'm Mikey Grylls. I've never been a member of the British Special Forces. I barely got out of high school with a GED, and I've got no experience except for telling jokes on the radio. I will try to survive in urban situations using nothing but the company's credit card, a car, a nice one at that, my wallet, and whatever things I can find on the internet. You're listening to Urban Survival. I'm stranded in Chula Vista right now, in a sweltering heatstorm. I can't be certain, but if I had to guess, I'd say it's at least 81 to 83 degrees Fahrenheit. My shirt is sticking to my body, and I can detect the faint odour of perspiration, which is not good. If this ever happens to you, don't panic. Panicking can make a scene. or kill you. Here, this looks like a good place. It's deserted. There are racks of what appear to be DVDs or CDs on the walls, and they're scattered throughout. Part of survival is scavenging. I could use the casing for driving Miss Daisy as a makeshift ashtray if need be. I'm not too familiar with this place, but there seems to be an employee here. She's doing a crossword puzzle.

2:45:43and trying to stay awake. So I'll approach her, but with caution. Excuse me, miss. Yes. Can you tell me where I am? Sir, you're in a blockbuster video, sir. I've never heard of it, but that's not important. Why is there no one in this building? Uh, Alicia. It's Alicia, sir. But it's spelled A- Lee C R. Great. Well, it's Alicia, so. Anyway, the reason there's no one's here, because there's things like Netflix, On Demand, iTunes, Hulu. Yes, that's right. Netflix. I love Netflix. In fact, I've got Happy Gilmore in my queue. I'm going to browse around. There's barely enough to entertain me here. I'm going to have to ration these films to make them last.

2:46:46My only genres include comedy, family, drama, action-adventure, romantic comedy, music performance video, documentary, video games. Look at this one. Oh, yes. This is Encino Man, a classic. The choice has been made. I'll now attempt to purchase this. However, I'm famished. I've decided on popcorn. Oh, my God, yes. Oh, my God. Oh, this is delicious. I can tell I am regaining my strength, my tip of the day. Sometimes it is okay to eat yellow snow, but only if it's in a snow cone stand and it's favored like coconut or vanilla. Until next time, I'm Mikey Grills. Vanilla. Vanilla. Vanilla. Vanilla. I love it.

2:47:49So did you know that The Expendables, the 90-year-old Sylvester Stallone, was number one movie this weekend? That's shocking. Made $16 million. It's made $64 million since it came out. I heard Jennifer Aniston's movie did not do well. What is that? The Switch. Eighth. Eighth. Eighth place. Yeah. That's brutal. Sienna's on the line. No! Hi. I really wanted to call and say I was in labor, but unfortunately. Oh, my gosh, Sienna. I know. We miss you. My heart just dropped. I miss you guys, too. I'm sitting here like, come on, baby, let's do this. Say we're on the way to the hospital. I know it. The baby is due on Friday. So nothing like no, are your Braxton Hicks contractions? Oh, yeah, Braxton Hicks. See, I mean, I've had those for a while.

2:48:52But yeah, no, I'm here. Jenna's here. She had two friends spend the night last night, so she's thrilled to have me home. That's awesome. My money's on Wednesday, Sienna. I know. I heard you say that. I'm stuck. For sure. You got to keep it dilated. Yeah, you got to keep it dilated. Sienna. I just wanted to call to you and Mike, wish you good luck tomorrow. Thank you. Thank you. So, Sienna, is it weird to hear the show? It's so weird. I bet. I wrote on Facebook this morning on the fan page because Todd's alarm goes off. Yeah. And right when it goes off, it's to the intro song to, you know, Linkin Park. Right. And I was like, meh. Oh. Have you been able to listen to us or is it too weird? No.

2:49:44I've been listening pretty much all morning. I took the girls to go get some breakfast. You took your boobs to go get breakfast? Maybe you come back to work. Maybe you come back to work soon. We miss you. I took Jenna and her friends to get breakfast. Maybe you come back to work. We miss you so much. I can't wait until we're all back together again. I know. In the new studio. It's going to be awesome. I love you all. We love you. Good luck tomorrow. Everything's going to be great. Thank you, Sienna. And I will hopefully have some really exciting news when you guys are back on. I hope so. Thanks a lot. Bye, honey. Bye. Bye, Sienna. We love her. That's Sienna. She's our news girl, and she's out on her maternity leave, and that baby should be here anytime. I was hoping she would call in. I thought, like, for a second, man, I saw her name there, and I was like, maybe she's going into labor. I know. That's what I thought it might be. Let's see. All right, well, as Sienna just said, tomorrow I'm having surgery, and I will be back in here, and we will be back in here as soon as humanly possible. I mean, as soon as we can, we will be back in here. And I've had this done before, and they're going to hopefully do it in a way that gets me back even sooner. They're thinking about that they can try to do it laparoscopically. Wirelessly.

2:51:08Yeah, wireless. That's what I need. You're going to get an iPad installed. That's right. Yeah. Wireless. Someday. Hillary's in. Hi, Hill. Hi, Hill. How are you? Good. Yeah. I was going to tell you guys, I saw a new bit, speaking of iPad, I saw a new bit in the car. We were driving to LA. There was a girl playing on her iPad in traffic. Oh, wow. I have not seen that yet. No, I haven't seen that. I look over and she's, and I'm like, what are you doing? Idiot. Yeah. That's pretty crazy. So scary. I know. It's pretty crazy. Yeah. Hill, what do you got coming up? Well, I actually am going to wing it for my first few songs because I was in there talking to our promotions director. Good news about Independence Jam. Yeah. We were just saying. Yeah, we were just saying. Yeah. General admission is sold out. Yes, I love that. So cool. So just the bus passes, the safe ride thing, and there's only 110 of those left. Oh, wow. Love that. And we've been selling over. Like 120 tickets a day. That's so awesome. It's going to sell out. That is so cool. Very soon. Yeah. So cool. So independentscham.com if people want to get on it. Very nice. Very nice. All right. The lovely and talented Hillary is up next. And we do have the best of the Mikey Show in our absence. So please listen. And we will see you as soon as we can. Mikey Show's out.