The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 09/06/11
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Chris's datespit cup incidentJerry Lewis telethonMy Chemical Romance theftChargers season previewFoo Fighters ticket contestlive TV pantsingNational Children's Study enrollmentchrisdatespitcup
The show featured hosts Mikey, Woods, Lauren O'Brien (L-O-B), and producer Jay dealing with technical difficulties while sharing personal stories: they set up phone screener Chris on a date that went well, Woods accidentally spit on Jay's wife Kim's suit, they reminisced about Jerry Lewis telethon traditions, debated the My Chemical Romance drummer theft scandal, previewed the Chargers' season opener, ran a 'thumb' word contest for Foo Fighters tickets, and replayed a clip of a reporter being pantsed live on television.
What happened, in order
Chris the Phone Screener's Date Setup
The hosts discuss setting up their sweet phone screener Chris on a date, revealing he's 22 and they plan to find out how it went at a Padres game.
Woods' Spit Cup Mishap
Woods accidentally dumps his cup of Copenhagen spit on Jay's wife Kim's back during a suite visit, causing a messy and embarrassing moment.
Jerry Lewis Telethon Tradition
The crew talks about Jerry Lewis retiring from the telethon, the tradition of singing 'You'll Never Walk Alone,' and how the event still raised over $61 million despite his absence.
My Chemical Romance Drummer Scandal
The band's drummer Michael Petticone is accused of stealing from the band, admits an error in judgment on Twitter, and the hosts speculate wildly about what he took.
Grammy Theft Speculation
The hosts joke that the drummer might have stolen the band's Grammys, imagining him wheeling them away in a wheelbarrow and selling them on eBay.
Chargers Home Opener Preview
Woods discusses the Chargers' upcoming home opener at Qualcomm Stadium on the 9/11 anniversary, noting their roster moves and home-field advantage.
Thumb Word of the Day Contest
The word of the day is 'thumb,' and listeners who call in when they hear it can win Foo Fighters tickets.
Live TV Pantsing Incident
A reporter in New York gets his pants pulled down to his ankles live on air by a street performer, causing humiliation and a discussion about on-air professionalism.
People mentioned
MikeyWoodsLauren O'BrienL-O-BJayChrisKim IsbellJerry LewisNigel LithgowMichael PetticoneGerard WayDerek JeterCliffordPerry
38,315 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
Hello, test one, two. All right. Cool. You got it, Jay. So we're having some technical difficulties in our regular studio. And so we've all run back into the FM 949 main control studio because we figure the show must go on. And this is cool because, AJ, does this thing work? Yep. Sweet. We could still do this. Look at that. Nice. And we got everybody here. That's the important thing. There was a giant mess. I guess, with technical stuff this weekend. And so it was hard for stuff not to break. So some stuff broke. But they're getting us back up. We're going to be good to go and everything. And we're ready to get the party started. It is weird being back in here. I'll tell you that. It is weird. Man. We're back in the old studio. And they're fixing ours. It'll be up and ready to go here in just a minute. The only thing that I don't have...
is I don't have my computer and I run a lot of my stuff from my computer. And so we're going to have to rely on just discussing it as opposed to giving you some actual audio. But I wanted to get us on the air. The other thing is, is I don't know whether or not our phone lines are actually working in this studio or if they only work in our studio. I don't know. It may be that they work. So you could try calling us. 570-1949. Text is still working, we know for sure. 949mikey at gmail.com. A couple of big things happening over the weekend. First of all, long weekend, but a long weekend, and it was three days. We were all itching to get back in here. We couldn't wait. Is that mic working? No. There we go. There you go. Hi. We're all itching to get back in here, and we are now back. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. I'm 41, and Woods is our sports guy. He's 36. He's a Yankee fan, but from Texas. Right, which is, it's not a prerequisite to be born in the place where you root for the team. That's true. Some might say that it is, especially some on Facebook might say that it is. I don't understand that. They will say...
They will say, are you even from New York? Who cares? Yeah, I was born in the Bronx. Does that make it different? Who cares? What if I like the Mets for no reason? What if I like the Yanks in 85 when they were freaking terrible and have liked them since 85? And your dad got you into them, right? And I got to prove it every stinking time. I guess I don't have to, but I feel I need to. Idiot. L.O.B. is Lauren O'Brien. She's our assistant producer. She's the blonde girl still sitting to my right. Even though we're in our old studios. Brought your coffee in, Mike. Oh, that's so sweet. Thank you. You're welcome. Thank you for doing that. That gets me going. I need it. And then our producer's Jay, who's running around with a chicken with his head cut off. With the chicken. With the chicken, which is so weird. He's going to use the leftovers for his dog. That's right. That's right. Let's see. And then our phone screener's Chris. It's crap. That's crap. And I really wish that we could talk about Chris. Right now, but we're waiting to talk about Chris. Our little guy, our phone screener, the sweetest guy in the whole wide world. Angel. He's a little angel. Well, he went on a date. The question is, how did it go? Now, how did it go? How did it go? How did it go? We did the dating game because this little angel of ours is 22 years old.
He isn't dating, doesn't have a girlfriend, and he's a good-looking guy. And we were like, you know what? We're going to take matters into our own hands. And so we set him up, and the date was Padres game with us in a skybox last Friday. And so what we know we cannot share, and we do know things. And we'll let him share, too. Boy, I've got some questions, though. We all have questions, and we don't even want to tell you one way or another. Was it good or was it not so good? And why? Those are the questions that will be answered in just a bit. Big day for me, my son. My kid is autistic and today he starts his first day of kindergarten. Now why do I say my kid is autistic? Because first day of kindergarten is hard for anybody. And it's a regular school. It's not like it's for... special kids he's never gone to a school for special kids he's always gone to a regular school even as preschool was regular kids and so he has challenges uh you know going into this situation oh was i praying this morning for that kid to be able to do good in his first day of kindergarten and what's he asked me he said is he nervous
I believe he is. He usually has a real easy time sleeping and he was awake and asleep and awake and asleep and awake and asleep. And at one point I could see him thinking. And I said to him, what are you thinking about? And he was pulling on the skin on his lip and he was just looking at me and he didn't say anything. I said, what are you thinking about? And then he thought about it and he said, I'm thinking about Thomas and friends. And I just said, OK. I said, all right, buddy. Maybe he was. Maybe he was thinking about Thomas and Friends. Either way, if he was thinking about Thomas and Friends or if he was thinking about his first day of kindergarten, which is what I think he was thinking about, I said, all right, buddy. I love you. Now, it was hard for me. When I did kindergarten, first of all, I didn't have the benefit of any preschool where he has. He's been acclimated. He knows what a classroom is. I didn't know what a classroom was. All I knew was home. And so my first day of kindergarten, my mom loaded my butt on the bus. Sayonara. See you later. Well, hasta luego. Hasta luego in my situation because I'm Hispanic. Don't speak a word of Spanish. And so she put me on the bus. I didn't know anything. I was crying, blah, blah, blah. And, you know, got to school. Eventually it was all good. So even if it doesn't go well today, I'm considering to myself, well.
Think about your first day of kindergarten. It wasn't that easy for you either, you big crybaby. Jake isn't a crybaby, though. He just has his challenges with the autism. I remember there was kids in there that could tie their shoes. I was like, how do you do that? I know. That's what mom and dad do. Why are you so grown up? Yeah. Kid in my kindergarten class. I'll never forget him performing nuclear fission. Or fusion. Fusion. Right in front of me. I was like, gosh, how do you know? Yeah, there was a kid in my kindergarten class named Clifford. And he was a lunatic. And they had to tie him to a chair. And when I say tie him to a chair, they tied him to a chair with a jump rope. Oh, wow. We went out to recess. They tied him to a chair. Wow. Did this happen all the time or just once? When he acted up. They tied him to a chair. That's ridiculous. I bet he acted up a lot. He did. Tie him to a chair. Tie him to a chair. And we're walking out for recess. See you later, pal. And he's sitting there tied up. Like thrashing around. Screaming. Yeah. This is a problem child. Cannibal Lecter. Yeah. He's got a mask on his face. It's a problem child. He's a problem child. He's in there screaming. Dude, what, 31 years later? Remember, like it was yesterday. Clifford. Well, listen, somebody may say to Clifford, listen, when I was a kid, I was really a problem. Clifford goes, Clifford's 40 now. 36 now, I guess. Where are you? Tie me a chair, pal. Hey, do you ever get tied to a chair? I don't think so.
And they're like, well, seriously, they almost tied me to a chair. He goes, no, I'm not kidding. I wasn't saying that figuratively. I meant they literally tied me to a chair. You see these burn marks on my arm? That's from freaking jump rope, all right? So just relax, hard ass. I got you, okay? They had to use the jump rope. It's all they had available to them. I'll never forget it. That's ridiculous. Scarred for life, me. How do you think Clifford feels? No doubt. They hadn't even invented jumpy quartz yet or they would have used that. Yep. So anyway, it's a boy's first day. We'll see. Oh, gosh. Can't wait to hear about it. Love him. Love him to death. Friday we're off because we're taking him to Disneyland for his birthday. Friday's his birthday. Yes. So we'll see how that goes. Yesterday was Labor Day and really beautiful weather, right? Oh, yeah. It's perfect. I enjoyed it. You're not perfect, San Diego, okay? Your weather, it's not perfect. And I enjoyed it yesterday. And maybe they proved that point last year, San Diego. That's true. Maybe San Diego proved that point already. Boy, I liked that cool, dark yesterday. It was nice. Oh, I liked it. Yeah. I was in. I was watching the rain, literally. Unbelievable. So anyway, it was rainy yesterday. But yesterday was a big day because on Labor Day, it's been a tradition for Jerry Lewis to do his telethon. Right. He retired, though.
Jerry Lewis retired from being the guy. Well, in his retirement, they made more money. Wasn't it one of those situations where they're like, hey, you don't really want to work here anymore, do you? Yes, I do. Jerry, Jerry, Jerry. Listen, we got a good run. We've had a good run. I got to keep doing it. You don't really want to work here anymore, do you? They love me. They want to see me. They've got to see me. They don't. And actually, I think we'll do better without you. I think we'll do better. I think we'll get more money. You won't do as good. So anyway, we packed your stuff. It's by your car. And you can take it to the house whenever you're ready. Identical. Identical Jerry Lewis. Imagine if it was so weird when he would come out. And we were used to seeing him all weird like that. How you doing? It's wonderful to be here and raise money for these beautiful children this way. I love all of you. People are like, just be the nutty professor, bro. 46th annual. And Nigel Lithgow, the guy that produces American Idol, he was the guy that apparently, he was the guy that was hosting it. Or co-hosting it. And he pulled a move.
He says this thing. It's a tradition that at the end of every Jerry Lewis telethon, it's a tradition that Jerry sings this song called You'll Never Walk Alone. And it brings the house down. There's not a dry eye in the house. And it's a tradition. Since the very beginning, Jerry comes out and at the very end of this deal, you'll never walk alone. It's a tradition. Guy's 85 years old. He kept doing it. Well, Nigel Lithgow says, I was fully expecting for him to turn up. At any point. And join us. And hopefully another year he might. But he knows he's always welcome on the telethon. It's his baby. Hey, maybe don't call him out. Yeah. He's done. He's retired. I thought you told me to stay away. I thought you said to stay out. My club man. I was in sandals. Isn't he?
Poor guy gets called out on it. Nigel Lithgow. By the way, his publicist said he's retired. He never said he was going to come back and sing that stupid song. His wife's like, I told you you should have done it. I'm retired. One song. Would it kill you? What else are you doing? It would kill me. It actually would kill me. My heart can't take it. Well, you want to go out with a bang. I guess. $61 million and a half dollars they raised. Wow. That's a lot of money. 2.6 more than last year. Can't argue with the numbers. You know what I mean? Yeah. Guy did good. He did good by them. Let's see. This is a crazy story. The band My Chemical Romance, who, I don't know the music, but you may know the music. But this is the weirdest story. I know. And what's he's going to tell you about the Chargers here in just a second? It's on this week. This is the week of football. This is it. Thursday night. Football's back. But anyway, My Chemical Romance, their drummer ripped them off. And he's been fired. And he's admitted it. He's just not saying what it is, and they're not saying what it is. But listen.
to this. The guy's name is, well, his last name is Petticone. I think it's Mike, if I remember. Okay. Or maybe Rob. Michael Petticone. Michael Petticone. Okay, I was right. Okay, so in a statement on the band's website, their guitarist says that Michael Petticone, their drummer of My Chemical Romance, was, quote, caught red-handed and that the relationship between him and the band is now over. He goes on to say that the guy confessed in Auburn, Washington last week, but he didn't reveal what the guy had stole. The band says that they're heartbroken and sick to their stomachs over the situation, and they have no intention of pressing charges. This guy, Petticone, goes on Twitter. Oh, by the way, they've already replaced him. The new drummer starts on Saturday.
But anyway, this guy, the drummer, Michael Petticone, he went on Twitter and he said he admits that he made an error in judgment. He says that the situation is more complicated than it sounds. He also says that the incident does not define him. And he insists that he never meant to hurt the band or their fans. What did he steal? I need to know. I need to know. I need to know. In the first thing I pictured was him in the dressing room. Yeah. Okay. And he's looking around. He's got their pants. And he's going through their pants. And he's pulling out cash. And he's like. Short me. I'm just a tour. Sons of bitches. He's got Gerard Way's jacket. And he's pulling 20s out of it. Hey, man. What are you doing? What? What are you doing? I'm not doing anything. I'm not doing anything. Caught red-handed. That is so great. That is so great. I pictured it in my head. They come in, they're all makeuped up. They're like, what are you doing going through makeup? What? A mic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That Madden 10 in your bag? No, no, no, no. Is that your Madden 10? You don't even want Madden 10. It's 2012. My freaking Madden 10. Yeah, it's yours. It's got my mascara written on there. I wrote my name and mascara on it. You got me. You got me. It's got to be money, right? It's got to be cash money. I don't know.
Like going through maybe merchandise, like merchandise money, you know, like doing something like that. It's got to be. Maybe we just make up forever. We should. Maybe do they have Grammys? Maybe he stole all their Grammys? Stole their Grammys. And they carry them with them on tour. He's carrying them off in his arms. He's got a wheelbarrow. He hawked the Grammys. I mean, it was, this guy apparently, he's a replacement for somebody else. And so he had kind of like hit the big time. He's like, hey, here I am on tour. And now they're like, see you later, pal. Hey, John, I got to tell you something about Mike. This is going to hurt you. Come over here. I'm looking on my screen right here on eBay. These are our Grammys on eBay. How do you know they're ours? It says on here, My Chemical Romance Grammy. And it says, The Real Deal. I'm not kidding. I'm in the freaking band. This is a real Grammy. This is a real deal. That's Mike's hand in the photo. He's holding the Grammys. He's holding a copy of his birth certificate. It says Michael Pettigone. Oh, wow. You know, dude, it's a weird thing when it happens. There was a guy, he played for the Yankees. He stole Jeter's stuff out of his locker to sell. A glove, a jersey. Where's he going to sell it? I know. I know. And I'm like, you don't think you're going to get caught? Hey, here's Derek Jeter's glove. I mean.
Come on, they were teammates. Can't do that. Can't do it. I watched it 17 times this weekend. Gosh darn it. You on drugs. Can't do that. You're getting in a lot of trouble for stealing from your bandmates. They find out about it anyway. Let's see what's going on. Oh, by the way, word of the day is thumb. I have no idea what the prize is. He put it up there. Oh, he did. Oh, Foo Fighters. Foo Fighters tickets. Listen for the word thumb. I'll work that into a sentence between now and 10. And when I work that into a sentence, you've got to be caller number 9, 570-194-9, and you'll win Foo Fighters tickets. So, Woodsy, what's going on with the Chargers? Well, this is it, man. This is the last week we're going to have to suffer without football. So football will kick off. It's actually going to be this Thursday. But I'm going to tell you about the Chargers, okay? They're going to open the season at Qualcomm on Sunday, which is the anniversary.
of 9-11. They're going to have a big to-do. They're going to play taps. They're going to have all kinds of victims and stuff. It's going to be crazy. Every game, I'm guessing, every game across the country will probably do their tribute. I sure hope. Yeah, because, I mean, you figure it's 9-11 and the season is starting. For all intents and purposes. It starts Thursday, but for all intents and purposes, Sunday. Right. You've got to figure all the games will do their version of the tribute. It's going to be awesome. Giants and Jets, whoever's home, will be the big one, I'm sure, because it's New York City. And the Skins, Redskins, you've got to figure it's going to be a big deal, because it's D.C. Yeah, this is the Chargers' first home opener since 2008. They are 14-7. when opening the season at home, which is good. It gives them a leg up. Also, they made a couple moves this weekend. They trimmed their roster to 53. They are ready for the season. Some notable names. Kelly Washington was a wide receiver they picked up. They are so deep at wide receiver. The guys they kept, Vincent Jackson, Vincent Brown, Malcolm Floyd, Patrick Creighton, Richard Goodman, and my man Brian Walters. Yeah. Whitey.
Yeah, the little small white kid. Whitey will get you. Yeah. That guy will get you. And he proved himself, man. He did, man. He's a playmaker. It's going to be great to see him out there. They also signed Niall Diggs, which is, I think, a pretty good pick, man. He started 12 games last year for the Rams. And another linebacker, 6'4", 240. He's going to join Takeo Spikes and Travis LaBoye. That little bit. That little bit. So, I don't know about you guys. I'm excited. It starts Sunday. Cocaine is a hell of a drug. Yeah. Thursday night. You're going to have Thursday night. You're going to have the season begin, which is weird. They're starting now on Thursdays. They play one game Thursday nights. I'll take it. I like it. I like it. So there was a thing on YouTube before of a weather guy that got scared of a bug. He was a black dude. I love him. Yeah, he's like. He got a little effeminate, didn't he? Oh, with the cockroach? Yeah. Oh, I thought you were talking about the other guy. No, the weatherman in the studio. Oh, okay. Remember that guy? Yes. And was he a little effeminate? Yes. By a little, you mean a lot. Okay, well, there is a new thing. And this guy is not effeminate, but he does have arachnophobia, for real. Like, he really has an issue with spiders.
And they're handling spiders. The anchors are handling spiders. And they're turning it over to him. And he wants to be cool like, hey, I don't like spiders. Don't bring them over here. And they want to bring them over. They're doing a bit with him. And they're doing a bit with him. And he's not kidding. Yeah. So he walks over to the door where you get out of the place. He's going to leave. He's going to walk out. And you have to hear this. So we will play it for you next. Oh, my God, it's better than I thought. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Do you mind if I level with you? It's Frank. You're listening to a reenactment demonstrating just how easy it is to find the perfect certified pre-owned Lexus. Let's listen in. Frank, well, let me be frank with you.
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Okay, we've got some rain in our forecast, and it's raining this morning in different parts of San Diego, so it's kind of slippery on your commute. We've got a signal alert on the 67 southbound after Vigilante Road. It's an overturned car on its roof. Another car went up the guardrail. Six to ten cars involved in this accident. On the 163 northbound ramp to Genesee Avenue, we've got orange cones in the middle of lanes, and they are blocking that off-ramp. On the 805 southbound ramp to the 8 eastbound, a car spun out. It hit the left shoulder. This report, it's brought to you also by the County of San Diego Vector Control Program. Fight the bite. Protect yourself and your loved ones from mosquitoes that transmit the virus. Cover up. Use mosquito repellent. Drain standing water. Call 1-858-694-2888 or text PEST to 75309. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Yeah, this is the light. Mikey. Oh. All right. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I love watching human beings in their natural habitat. Woods. I have a fear of dentists. A fear. Like when I go to the dentist, it's palpable. Lauren. I'm more apt to listen to a specialist than a general practitioner. And Jay. You guys don't make homemade ice cream? Say what? On FM 94.9. Yeah, dog. Back in the studio. Back in our own studio. Chicken butt. I want you to remember. Dan, we can take your calls now, too.
570-1949 is our number. Word of the day, thumb, don't forget it. Will be worth Foo Fighter tickets for you. Online.com, that is our guy. That's Jared. Jared. Jared! The guy does the most amazing graphic design. You want posters made. You want... a website, you want business cards, anything you need, he'll do it. Okay, so we've talked to you about, by the way, I said that we got some good audio of reporters today. Some days it just rains and it pours with great audio. Today is one of those days. We've got a reporter getting pantsed that I'll play for you. And we have this guy. Again, let me set this up for you. This is big market. This is Indianapolis, Indiana.
And it's actually a pretty decent television market. It's a big city. They're doing Fox News and they do what they do on a lot of news channels. The anchors, they bring in animals and they play with the animals, you know? Well, they brought in some snakes and some spiders and stuff like that. And the weatherman genuinely is afraid of spiders. What do you call it? The zanker. He's not. He's got tarantula crawling on him and realizes that the weather guy is afraid of the spiders. So he thinks, I'll have some fun. What he doesn't realize is that dude is like afraid of spiders to a different level than we're afraid of spiders. Dude is what they call arachnophobic. They get him. Okay. He can't handle it. So here's what happens. Thanks for coming again. I appreciate that. Has anybody seen... We have a weather forecast to do. Jim, are you? Oh yeah, I'm over here on the opposite side. It's all fun and games right now. He's over there where he's supposed to be for his weather thing. This is the side of the studio. Thanks, Ray. I'm not even going to remotely get over that area right now. 948, guys, no.
948, let's talk about what's going on with the weather right now. Our satellite and radar map will go full screen here. Now, let me walk you through the process of your thought. Dude, at this point, is thinking to myself, I've started the weather. They're not going to screw with me. I've started the weather. Let's be professionals. Well, I've started the weather so they can't screw with me. Thank goodness. But all he's doing is watching the guy walking towards him. And he's like, he won't do it because I'm live on television. He won't. And we'll show you the latest now on the satellite and radar map. Temperatures right around into the 70s at this hour. There's a warm front lifting through the area this morning. And we're going to be looking at, again, temperatures on the way up into the upper 90s later on today. Looks like our tower cam right now has us under, let's see, no, no way. Uh-uh. You just put it back in there. Imagine the side of a stage. When you look on the side of a theater stage, there's equipment. That's where he is. He's on the side where there's an exit. Out of the shot, out of the camera. There's a long shot filming him because he's standing by the exit sign by a door. Ray, I'm leaving the studio right now. Now they're kind of like, oh.
Serious. He's not joking. He's got a problem with spiders. I will leave the studio. Dude, that thing shoots hair at you. It's got fangs. I don't even want to be around it. I told you I will punch you if you even get close to me. He's not kidding. Punch him. Punch him. My heart is racing right now. I'm not kidding. I do not like spiders. I don't know what it was. Something when I was a little kid, a long time ago. Did you have a phobia or something? Now the main anchor guy is like, okay, I didn't realize that he was nuts. I'm sorry. I'll jump out of airplanes and all that stuff. I'll do all the stupid things you guys have me do. Swim with the dolphins. I've gone to swim with the dolphins. Remember the time I did the story with the cheetahs and the baby cheetah was born? I'll do it.
I'll do all that crap. I told you. It's in my contract. No freaking spiders. And maybe you don't know that's in my contract. I'm telling you it's in my contract. Well, you do know because I told you about it. Yeah, remember that time we were having a contest? Remember before this segment started, I said, hey, dude, it's in my contract not to do spiders? I wasn't freaking kidding. Get them away from me. It's not funny. It's not funny. I just forgot that you were not a little girl. Right. I wasn't kidding. Yeah, I know. I thought you were a man. Well, I'm not. I am. I'm not a man. I'm a eunuch. I'm a eunuch afraid of spiders. Okay. I'm like a Ken doll down there. It's smooth. Leave me alone. Okay, fine. Whatever you want to call me, just keep away the freaking tarantula. Okay, I will miss. Ray is behind me, and somebody needs to talk about the weather. We're good. Somebody needs to do that. Dude, stay over there, Ray. Okay, I'm here. Somebody needs to talk about the weather. It's going to be hot. Oh, my God. God. He's upset, you guys. And he should be. Yeah, dude. I was reading their website, you know, where they posted where this was, and the viewers were upset at the anchor. Of course. And they were like, what's the matter with you, douchebag? Yeah. Like, can't you realize the guy, he doesn't like spiders? How about we pick something you don't like? You guys did that to me.
with snakes. It would be a quitting situation. I would be like, alright, you guys will have to go on without me. If you did that to me with spiders, same way. I'd start crying and leave and be like, you're done. If you're not into it, you're not into it. You know what I mean? Quit messing with people. That cake is so nasty. Just get it out of the studio. Hey, Megan, how are we doing on time? Do we need to do a weather forecast? Okay, here, can you just put up right now? Can you hit the little lever, Jim? So the woman that is sitting on the anchor desk is now having to take over for weather because weather dude's going to leave. Yeah, his little thing. 78 right now. Colts game tonight. That thing is freaking huge. It is. Crazy. Oh, my gosh. Do they really shoot hair? No. No, they don't. They don't shoot hair. They might. And now Jerry Lewis. When you walk through a storm, keep your head up high. And don't be afraid of the dark at the end of the storm. Did not understand Jay's drops. I get it. He's old. He's a golden sky. And the sweet silver star of a lark.
Walk on. That brings the house down, huh? Every time. 46 years. Yeah. 46 years. It's the 46th annual. Wow. If they don't get it at the end, they flip out. Yeah. I need my whatever it's called. You'll never walk alone. You'll never walk alone. Walk on through the rain. Oh, wow. Though your dreams be tossed and blown. It's creepy. Talk about kids here. Walk on. By the way, what he's done is amazing. There's no doubt about it. Maybe it was time. It might have just been time. You can't do Walk Alone 2011. Maybe it doesn't work anymore. Nah. I can't tell them. 46 years. It worked in 2010. It's not going to work in 11. All right? It worked in 1973. Yes. I don't think it even worked then. I'm not sure it worked then. But hey, listen. They made money. That's all they know.
With hope. Thank you. In your heart. Original Lawrence Welk. Yes. Did you ever just talk the lyrics? Oh, yeah. Yeah, because you're tired. You sing it 45 times. I don't like lyric talking. I don't either. He never liked it. He was never a singer, I don't think. He wasn't. He did it because he loved the children, which is admirable and nice. How about be funny? If I'm the producer of the show, if I'm the producer of the Jerry Lewis telethon. Walk along. Walk along. Yep. All right. Wrap up something. Wrap up something. Jerry. Jerry. That'll do. I think he's got white stuff on each side of his side. Wipe off. Wipe off. Wipe off. Wrap up. Wrap up. Wrap up. Wrap up. We speed up the tempo next year. Yep. And we'll never walk along. Thank you, Jerry. Walk along. We'll never walk along. Thank you. Jerry. Thank you. All right. All right. Uh-oh.
He's not soft. All right. Thank you, Jerry. Thank you. They'll be walking alone if they keep listening. Thank you very much. Thank you, Jerry. Thank you, Jerry. Thank you. Terrible. It is, but, you know. Tradition. Tradition. They stopped. They raised $2 million more this year. This is a reporter who is being very, very serious. He's in New York State. He's being very, very serious. When you are in the largest television market in the country and you are reporting on something, you need to be professional. It's hard to be professional when live on camera somebody runs up behind you and pulls your pants down. And I mean pulls them down off of you. Jay did that one time to Woods. Revealing everything to a 22-year-old hapless victim named Chris who was standing there.
And he saw Serbia. He saw Serbia. He knows what it's like now to be in a gym in Serbia. Who's Jim? 36-year-old male Jim. So, here you go. We'll donate $50 million to the Sierra Club to support its nationwide campaign to eliminate coal-fired power plants and reduce mercury pollution by 90%. Today... Street performers gathered at various spots across the Manhattan landscape to voice their support for the efforts and inspire others to take part in the Sierra Club's fight to replace coal production with clean and renewable energy. Those street performers are a common sight here in New York City. Crowds gathered at Union Square, Washington Square Park, and Pulitzer Fountain to watch as people... Thank you very much, Zach. Now, we don't have an announcement. What we missed, there was a story we were supposed to air. He's standing there with a microphone in his hand. Was it some D on the street? It was one of those street performers. And while he's holding the camera, the guy runs up and yanks his pants completely to his ankles. I don't mean a... This was not a knee pantsing. This was an ankle pantsing, which is a third degree burn. It wasn't a one hand catches it and...
Keeps it kind of up a little bit. Not at all. It was not a one hand covers the goods. What kind of pants is he wearing that he's able to get pants? He was wearing professional suit pants, but he had his belt on and probably not tight enough to keep street performers from pulling them down. Maybe he felt like, you know what, when he was putting his belt on that morning, I wonder if I have to worry about street performers pulling my pants down today. Well, better notch it up a couple. He thought he was going to have a big king-sized meal and wanted to have it loose. Saving some room for a snack. Well, there it is. So the guy got pantsed live on television. Oh, my gosh. How humiliating. Hey, if you want to play buzzword, call us 570-1949. What's the prize, Jay? Today's prize is lunch for two at Surf Brothers Teriyaki. There you go. How about that? Now, the way that we play buzzword, Jay, will give us a word. And then... We have to have that word in our head. And then he's going to give us clues. And we have to yell out what it is. In other words, let's say the word is egg. And he says, something happened to you that made you ashamed. Egg on your face. Egg on your face. So that's how it works. You're going to call and pick me, Woodsy, or L-O-B. There is a guy. Now, you tell me whether or not you think it's a good idea or not. There's a guy in Las Vegas who...
He rented out one of those earth movers, you know, big tractors that move around dirt. He rented one, gave him an idea. He said, why don't I build a place here in Las Vegas? And I'll charge people up to 600 or excuse me, 750 bucks. And they will come out here. I'll name this place, dig this. I'll give them a 10 minute course, which will allow them to be able to jump into these earth movers. And they go out there and get to play in the sandbox. They get to get in there for $750 and after a 10-minute course, go move things. Like what, you say? Like what? This woman says, I thought it was going to be a lot clunkier, but with the lighter you are on the controls, the easier it worked. She spent two hours digging a trench, moving tires, and using the machine's bucket to scoop basketballs on top of cones.
Meanwhile, you and me, we go to work every day. This dude said, for $750 a pop, I'm going to let people move around stuff. It's freaking brilliant. And we didn't think of it. I wouldn't have thought that would have been successful. No. It is. It's a little pricey. It's stupid. People want it. For that price? They want to move stuff around. It's just a bunch of rich people that are bored and have nothing more to do. Yeah, the other half lives. Hey, maybe it is. Let's see what it takes to be blue collar, guys. Yeah, exactly. I love to drive in the front end loaders and the bulldozers and stuff. It was cool. I've never done it. $750. I would rather get paid $750. Yeah, for sure. Now, whether or not the people that do it are stupid, the fact of the matter is some dude. is making $750 a pop. That's crazy. Because he thought, I think I got something. I think people would like to do this. Wow. And the dude was right. This is M1, hot for teacher from Claremont. Who do you want? How you doing, man? Doing well, doing well. Good. Who do you want for buzzword?
Winning train and go with L.O.B. She's going to win. She hasn't won in a couple weeks. Well, she's going to win. Yeah, she's not. I think I lost last week and that was it. I got her last week. Every time we say she wins. No, the thing how you get her now is how men are better than women. Yeah. Got to get in her head. She spent all weekend ironing. That's right. For her boyfriend. Sexist comments. No, I wet my shirts and put them in the dryer when I need to iron. Okay. Hang on the line. You're not a real woman then. No, I'm not. Because a real woman knows how to iron. I don't know about that. M1 Noob from Spring Valley. Who do you want? I guess if I can't pick the winner, I'll go with Wood. You got it. And finally, M1 LA Kings fan from San Diego. I have Mikey. You've got me. I apologize. All right, let's get this thing going. What's a woman? James! What's the word, Jay? Today's word is mouth. All right. M-O-U-T-H. All right. So the clues are going to have that in it. Mouth. Mouth. Mouth. Mouth. It's a word mouth. Gargle with it. Mouthwash! Lauren? Dang it. Maybe I'll make jokes, Mike. Verbal referral. Word of mouth! Lauren again. Really? Yes. She's hollering something out. No, I didn't. I said word of mouth.
Oh, man. Turn her mic up. Can't hear. Don't talk. Heard you. M&M's do this. Not your mouth. Not your hand. There you go. Band that sings. Smash mouth. Walking on the sun. Oh, my God. I was like, what band has mouth in it? Yeah, I was like, mouth breather. Good band. Big band. Say something really stupid. Put your mouth. What started first? It took you longer to get it out, but that's... L.O.B. is physically complaining. A harmonica. Mouth organ! A mouth tool! A mouth... Mouth organ? Yeah, a mouth organ. Is it over? No. What was it? What was it? Mouth organ. Mouth organ. Oh, okay. I thought it was a mouthpiece. I've never heard of it. Two of my favorite things to do. First aid when they are not breathing. Mouth to mouth! Resuscitation! You son of a... Gosh, darn it.
Oh, I was still focusing on his joke. Mouth and organ. You may get this one, Mikey. Salivating at the sight and smell of food. Mouth-watering. There you go. Woods and I are tied with four. Mikey has one. Mouth-watering. Weird. A spoiled person is said to have been born. Yeah. All right, you. Really? I'm not sure who said it. He articulated it better. Oh, my goodness. A new word. And the word is king. Kings of Leon. N-G. That'd be queens. Fast food giant. Burger King! Mikey, where were you? What's the score, Lauren? Me, four. Mikey, one. What's the six, is it? Okay, we've got two two-pointers here. CNN.
There it is. That's the game. Can't catch him. What's this thrusting? What's this thrusting? What's this thrusting? What's up, dude? Dang it. You're back. Yeah. You're back with a vengeance. Say that. Say that. Hyper-focused. M1 Noob from Spring Valley. The guy won for you. I mean, not only did he win for you, but he brought it home. Fresh chicken lunch for you. You know what I'm saying? Some chicken wings. That's right, dude. You're about to enjoy yourself some fresh teriyaki on the woods. Hang on, okay? Guess what they're getting rid of now? They said it's going to affect you, because it is. They'll tell you. There is a documentary out about how people are getting eaten by lions. How? Because people own... And there's a documentary out right now about people that own crazy-ass animals like lions.
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Log on to OvationHair.com and click on FM 94.9 at checkout for a special introductory discount. Try the new paraben sulfate and formaldehyde-free advanced ovation cell therapy system at OvationHair.com. And remember to select FM 94.9 at checkout for your special savings. Join the Ovation Nation at OvationHair.com. Hey, Mom, it's me, Baby Eddie, here in your belly. Oh, Eddie, honey, what's wrong? Nothing, Mom. I'll get your attention because I have some exciting news. Oh? Mom, you and Dad need to sign us up for the National Children's Study. It's the largest long-term study of children's health and development ever conducted in the U.S. And it will help expand what doctors know about children's health. I want to help, but... Don't worry. It doesn't involve medications or treatments. There will be periodic visits and interviews as I grow from now until I'm 21 years old. The study wants to learn more about how the environment and genetics affect my health and development where I live, learn, and play. That sounds like a good idea. Where do we sign up?
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There is some rain throughout San Diego, so those roads are a little... A couple sigilerts, too. One on the 67 southbound after Vigilante Road. There were 8 to 10 cars involved in this accident. The 163 southbound before Park Boulevard. There's an accident in the middle of lanes. And as you head into Rainbow, the 15 southbound after Rainbow Valley Boulevard. An accident over on the right shoulder. This car was hit by a semi. And the semi... kept going this report brought to you by subway try the new subway restaurants my five dollar menu more five dollar choices that you can customize to make a meal that's just right for you subway eat fresh i'm stacy cohen fm 94.9 bbz t san diego only good financial media station and now back to the mikey show with mikey i don't know the difference between odd and even lauren if there's a movie with meg ryan in it i'm like i'm out i'm out woods i got one word for you dude Yeah, and Jay. I stole from the Rolling Stones dressing room. I got this little coffin thing, and I stole it from that on FM 94.9. So what are hotels getting rid of? We'll tell you in just a second. Hang on. Apparently the pandas at the zoo are not feeling love. Maybe they need to put on some music or something. Sexy playlist, maybe. Sexy playlist. Yeah, they've got to send them your sexy playlist. Bai Jun is not pregnant. I am so sorry. I am really sorry about it.
Those pandas are born. Yeah, it is. It's hard to get them pregnant. But they just did tests and confirmed that Bai Jun is not pregnant. We've had Bai Jun from China since 1996. And what we have found is that they are very, very difficult to get to be amorous. Which means not pregnant. So, Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, in a second, I'm going to tell you what's bad news for fantasy football owners. But first, I got to tell you that sports is brought to us by our friends at Frank's Red Hot. Frank's Red Hot. Get some! Well, if you had Peyton Manning on your team for your fantasy quarterback, as a lot of people do, and they have for the last 15 years, he will not be playing. And who knows how much he's going to be playing this year. He's the only four-time MVP. He has started 227 consecutive games. But he's got a neck.
that they're saying, listen. It's surgery for it. It's surgery. Yeah, he had surgery for it in the offseason. They're just saying, his rehab is not going the way we want it. There's a couple of reports out of Indy. He may not play at all this year. Oh, my God. Guess who his backup is? Kerry Collins. Holy cow. Have fun with that, Colts fans. Also, San Diego State got off to a great start this year. They beat Cal Poly 49-21 at Qualcomm. Good job, Aztecs. Let's see. So I'm Mikey, that's Woodsy, that's L-O-B. Jay is our producer and our phone screener is Chris. And we are going to be hearing from Chris how his date went. We set him up on a date. We did the dating game. And we're going to find out how it went. So stick around. Okay. Oh, and word of the day is thumb. Be listening for that word. Could get you a pair of Foo Fighters tickets. Hotels are getting rid of the little bottles of shampoo.
It's ridiculous. Yeah, well, here's what ticks me off about it. They're saying it's because they don't want to be wasteful. Oh, come on. It's not about money, right? No, it has nothing to do with money. No. And they're saying that. They're going to save thousands, millions. Millions. Yeah, they are. But they say, no, you know, those things, we get them in bulk. They don't, yeah, it doesn't mean much to our bottom line. We just don't want to, we want to be a greener society. We don't want to waste. Doing the green bit. As long as they don't get rid of the lotion. Yeah, yeah, yeah. As long as they. Don't get rid of lotion. That's Jay Isbell. Everybody's our... Mike, I know a way that hotels could save a lot of money. Yeah. Quit putting them Bibles in there. Yeah, Mike. You know how much them things cost? I mean, if you just cut out the Bible in every hotel, listen, I don't want to read the Bible. I don't want it in my hotel room. Right. That's why I'm there in the first place. Exactly. To not read the Bible. Yeah. Maybe I should have gotten that thing before I got to the hotel. Or in my case, motel. Motel. I ain't spending for a hotel. We can't do it in El Paso in this Motel 6. I don't know what you want. It's not like they're getting rid of the shampoo completely. They're going to put big distributors on the walls. They are? Yeah. So you'll have all the different types on the wall. Then I can't steal the good shampoo and conditioner and take it all with me. See, I'm okay with that. I love taking those little things. Oh, yeah. Why? I take them from the cart in the aisle. Yeah. I'll load up on those SMBs. Do what? Take them home.
And I put them in my dop kit for when I travel. Yeah, see, that's stealing. Yeah. The hotel shampoo and conditioner is usually the nastiest. I stay at nice places at LMB. Well, still. All the places that she stayed at, she's saying that they were like powder. You know, they were powdered and they weren't good. But at other hotels like Motel 6, they have a bar. A little bar, you take the paper off of it and it's not bad. It's good. Wood steals it. It's a little tiny bar. Of shampoo? Yes, it's a little bar of shampoo. I'm very lost by what you're talking about. Where do they have it? Every place, right? You know what I like is the sewing kits. You ever got that? Yeah, I get them and I throw them away because I don't use them. I don't sew, neither does the messes. I take all of it as a memento. You're a pack rat. Yeah. It's a memory of a good time. I'll say Mac. All right, let's bring our little Chris in. Little angel. Get in here. And find out how his date went. You will remember that when we talked to Chris last week, we were saying, hey, listen, we're going to set you up with somebody, but we're going to decide who the three candidates are going to be, who the bachelorettes are going to be.
And then you're going to choose from the three bachelorettes, just like on the dating game. You're not going to see them. He didn't. And he chose. And the girl that he chose was a girl named Perry. And on Friday night, we went to a baseball game, luxury suite. We all got there 7 o'clock. Yes. All I was saying was, where's Chris? Oh, really? Where's Chris? Where's Chris? Where's Chris? Where's Chris? Chris, what time did you guys show up? 7.05, 7.10? No, like five minutes after the game started. Really? 7.30. 7.30. 7.30. I was stressed out. 7.45, maybe. It could have been between 7.30 and 7.45. But first, let's get Chris's thoughts, feelings, and then we will give you our play-by-play, which you'll have to endure.
Chris, you have to. You have to endure our sight of what we saw from our point of view. Yes. Okay. Yes. Go ahead, Chris. How did it go? It went great. We started off by meeting at the park because she had work late. And so we started off before the game. We met at the park and just walked up to the suite. So I don't know why. We showed up at 745. Maybe we just took a little stroll. We don't know the answer to that either. We stopped and got pizza. That's true. Did you? We stopped and got pizza because we didn't know there would be food in the suite. So we showed up with pizza in our hand and a soda and there's all this food right in front of us as soon as we walked in. Woods embarrassed you when you walked in? I was embarrassed. Remember, he walks in and he's got a thing of pizza and a Coke and I go... Hey, you know there's food here. Will you bring sand to the beach? Yeah, he looked at me and goes, yes, I do. Oh, gosh. Did you buy it at the park? Yeah, we bought it at the park. Oh, wow. Did you buy? I bought it. Attaboy. All right, good. And it went well. It went well. We had a lot of fun. We walked every now and then. We would take a break and walk around the park. Yeah, you sure did. Yeah, you sure did. Every now and then. We thought you were doing maybe cocaine because you laughed so much. Every inning.
We go, where's Chris? Where are they going? Where are they going? They keep leaving. Did they leave? Are they going for quickies? Yeah, but... Did they say goodbye? No. So, what I want to do is get to Chris's side of it so that we can just jump on this thing like hyenas eating a zebra. A carcass. A carcass. We just want to jump on it and tear it apart. Don't worry. It won't be painful. No, no, no. Don't worry. Now, is that all the contact you had after Friday night? No, well, on Friday night, too, after, we stayed for the fireworks, so we watched the fireworks. But then, after that, we decided that on Sunday, no, yesterday, Monday, we went to breakfast in La Jolla. You rascal. Look at this rascal. In La Jolla. Easy. Easy, Donald Trump. Wow. Man. How did breakfast go? It went great. It went great. Did you talk between Friday night's game? and Monday's breakfast? No, not that much. You did not? Well, wait, wait, wait. He said not that much. We were just planning Monday. That's what the texts were for. So you did text about Monday. Hey, you want to go have breakfast? Who initiated what? Great question. At the end of Friday, we were like, let's play the game. Who's going to talk to each other first? You said that. Yeah, we kind of said it all out there. I love it. Ballsy. And so I was the one who said, do you want to have breakfast? Good man.
How long do you wait? Sure. Next, like 12 o'clock the next day. What's wrong with that? Nothing is wrong with it. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing's wrong with it. It's not needy. It's not. It could have been Sunday night. They had an understanding. The understanding was we enjoyed one another's company. Have you learned nothing from me, Chris? Nothing? He wants to date her. Yeah. We don't know this. We don't know this. Anyway. He wanted a second date. It's true. He got it. Can we now, can we tell our side? Yeah. Do it. Where the hell's Chris? Where's Chris? Where's Chris? Where's Chris? Where's Chris? Where's Chris? Has anybody seen Chris? I go up to Jay. I go, is Chris coming? Has he decided that he isn't going to come? He's not coming now. He's decided he's not coming. They went to dinner. Jay goes, no, he's coming. I know he's coming because I talked to him. I just, I think he's. stuck in traffic or something. Maybe he can't find the switch. How can he not? Maybe he doesn't find it. We've got to send a search party out for him. I think Jay said to me, she works until six. Right? Didn't you say that? And I go, okay, that explains why we're here. He's not. Because we were worried. But then he comes in. Now, he comes in and everybody plays the game called try not to pay too much attention to Chris. You know, that's what we all try to play.
And it's very difficult to play it because we all want to pay attention to Chris. He just got the man of the hour. The man of the hour just showed up with the girl of the hour. We're all supposed to act normal? Except I cheered when he walked in. Which was contagious. So we all did it. I got the preemptive don't be a jerk speech. I got that preemptive speech out. That was good. Too bad it didn't take. It did not take because the first thing you said was, hey, bring Santa to the beach, pal. What are you bringing pizza here for? I saw the pizza and sodas and I almost cried. Yes. You love him so much. You say he's so sweet. He's so sweet he didn't know. He didn't know. He didn't want to take advantage. He wanted to make sure that they were taken care of. So my first thought was, so what do we chop liver over here? What do we chop liver over here? She don't know us, huh? Thought we were friends. Thought we were friends. Poor guy.
He's the sweetest guy in the world. He is so focused on it being about her. He forgot to say hi to everybody because he's so focused. He's focused, which I don't begrudge him. It was just comical. He gets there. All he wants to do is make his way out to the seats in the suite. Okay, the seats are like outside the suite. All he wants to do is beeline there, but everybody. And there's a lot of us. There's 18 people in there. Everybody. Chris. Hey. There he is. Hey, Chris. Hey, my man. How you doing? Hey. You look great. You look good, huh? You made it. Here's Chris. Yeah, this is wonderful. Thank you. We're glad to be here. We're glad to be here. Thanks. Yeah, it's wonderful to be here. Just look down. Look down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Thanks a lot. Thanks. He's sweating. Poor guy is sweating. Now, my wife says to me afterwards, she goes, that poor guy.
She goes, I hugged him. She said, that poor guy was 145 degrees Fahrenheit. That poor guy. And I don't blame him. He knows everybody's watching him. He's 145 degrees. All he wants to do is get out in the cool night air. Just get me out in the cool night air. Get me out in the cool night air. Talk to my date. I just want to talk to my date. Just don't want everybody to talk to me. Leave me alone. Please let me get outside. Please let me get... Everybody... Oh! There he is! Hey, how you doing? Hey, come here. Hey, you're looking good, kid. Hey, Chris, you haven't met my wife before. That's true. Give us a hug. Give me a hug over here, huh? Oh, we always knew. Hey, you still got it, kid. Look at this guy. Look at the sharp clothes on this one. Hey, everybody look at this guy. So finally, he gets outside with his date. And they sit down in the furthest. Okay. If you were to take a tape measure and say, what is the furthest most point from any human contact? Right. That's where he picked. He just, and it was a smart move. I want as far away from these people as I can possibly, so I can talk to her. If I don't, they're never going to leave me alone. Which is the true fact. True fact. So we left him alone. Now, I know in my head, I can't leave him alone all night. I have to put my nose in his business. I have to. I don't know when.
So all I did was I waited my turn. I watched as everyone else would go over. Hey, you too, kids. How you doing? Got everything you need? Everybody doing good over here? There's sodas. Yeah. Hey, look who happens. It's Chris. How you doing? You eat here too? Come for the strudel. It's great. It's great. Oh, you're watching the game, huh? Oh, this must be a date. What's the name? So I see Woods over there talking to him. I see people, various people go over. So finally, after, I mean, it's almost the end of the game. And he's now got up and left with her no short of four times. I was going to say 40. 40 times. Where's Chris? Where's Chris? Where's Chris? I get it. He's like, look, you animals, leave me the hell alone. I'm trying to enjoy a date. So finally, I go over in the most awkward way. This is me. I go. I know. Hey, guys. How are you guys? Hey, guys. Hey, guys. How are you? Hey, guys. Hi, guys. Dad. Yes. Like a dad, but worse. Like more dorky than a dad. So, you know, I just I hadn't said hi. And so I just wanted to come over and say hi. And they're both looking at me like, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh. Yeah, get out of here. Get out of here.
Let me out. Let me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. So, hi, guys. Good, good, good. All right, good. Everything going good? You guys need anything? Cool. Okay. Just wanted to say hi. That's all. You already said that. I know. I just was making sure. Did I mention hi? Hello. Hello. Everybody good? Hi. You're good. So you're good. I hi wanted to say. I just wanted to AI. Sorry, I practiced this. And may your first child be a masculine child. It was the most uncomfortable moment. Now, it's getting towards the end of the night. The Padres are losing terribly. Shut out. If you're just tuning in, we're going over Chris's date. Padres are doing terribly. We're all like... Completely ballpark fooded out. We're in a food coma. Everybody's ready to go. All it took was for one person to go, you guys ready to take the house? And everybody goes, yes, yes. LLB broke that. I did. Broke the seal on that. I think we're going to go. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You got my keys. You got my keys. That place cleared out quick. Quick. By the way, the biggest story of the night we're saving for a little later.
Had to do with Jay and his wife and Woods. But Jay left first. Weird. Out of all of us. Yeah, weird. He was gone for 45 seconds, I believe. I want to say 45 seconds. Before he walked back in, grabbed one bag. One bag of, what is it? Cracker Jacks. Cracker Jacks. One bag of Cracker Jacks. And very... shamedly said to me, for Jasper. He walked out. And I laughed so hard. Well, what you didn't see was that there was actually a pound of pulled pork in Kim's purse. That's what you missed. There were seven hot dogs in there. And I felt like saying to him,
Jay, it's okay, dude. We joke with you on the air, but you can actually take everything. Nobody cares. It's okay. It's fine. We were looking at all the leftover plates of food and the sternos and all that stuff. We were like, Jay would be going crazy right now. His head exploding. Because we shame him. We shame him about taking things. How much did you take home? I didn't take anything home. Wasteful. People that work there can have it. Listen, Jay, were cookies and brownies and stuff. And I thought to myself in my head, I thought, it must have taken every ounce of strength. Everything. Everything. To walk away. Constitution and strength to say, I'm leaving. I'm leaving. I'm leaving. I'm not taking. I'm not taking. Tubby's looking. Is Tubby looking? Is Tubby looking? He's looking. I don't care. Son of a bitch. I don't care. Dang it. Damn it. You bring the Tupperware in? You forgot the Tupperware in the car. Idiot. You idiot. I love you. I'm the best. His knuckles must have been white on that steering wheel. Jaffer, it's daddy. I'm coming home, but all I could manage was a bag of Cracker Jacks. There's chicken fingers. There's hot dogs. I couldn't get any of it. Sorry, Jasper! Meals for all of September. Wouldn't I have to buy food? I cannot believe how much food. Oh, there's a lot of food. You guys purchased. There's a lot of food. It's great. Oh, my gosh.
Sushi at a ballpark. You guys had sushi. I hate my weight. You had sushi and they didn't even take the sushi home. I bet there's sushi sitting in the garbage can right now. There was none left. Trust me. So we, wait, we haven't got to the good parts of Friday night. We haven't even got there. So just, just wait. Plus we're going to be talking to this dude that focuses stock on documentary on. People that keep tigers, lions, dangerous animals. Do some woods of wisdom. If you're in the military, you don't like Soulja Boy. You hear what this clown did? Of course. Holy cow. Idiot. A part of the Mikey Show now. Text them 949mikeyx.com. Or call Mikey now. 570-1949. More coming up on FM 94.9.
Okay, so you mentioned the 161-point inspection on all certified pre-owned Lexus models, the three-year warranty. Then you said something about no surprises, no sacrifices, 100% Lexus. Yes, yes, that's right. But I like surprises. Excuse me? I said I like surprises. Of course. But you know, no surprises just means because of the 161-point inspection and three-year, 100,000-mile warranty. The certified pre-owned Lexus you're buying has all the tangible and intangible qualities you'd expect from a Lexus. Ah, yeah, but still. Ah, okay, I'm sorry. I just can't sell you this, Lexus. What? Surprise. Oh! Oh, that was good. Yeah. Oh, I just got smoked. Gotcha. That was good. That was good. Well done. Thank you. Lexus certified pre-owned. No surprises, no sacrifices. 100% Lexus. See your Lexus dealer in Carlsbad, El Cajon, or Kearney Mesa. Or visit LexusCPO.com. Warranties three years from your date of purchase are 100,000 total vehicle miles. Your participating certified pre-owned Lexus dealer for details. Mom, I want to be a pilot. Is it tough? It's not easy. You could do it. Study hard. Go to a good school. Never skip your math homework. Piece of cake. Oh, yeah? But can you finish those carrots for your pilot's vision? I'd rather do my math homework. Thought so.
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Price and participation may vary. The Padres' schedule is winding down, but the baseball season continues with exciting playoff action. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show is your source for expanded pennant race coverage and the best Chargers reporting anywhere in San Diego. And, of course, we've set up camp at Montezuma Mesa for exciting Aztecs action all season long. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show, weeknights at 10 beginning in October on Channel 4 San Diego. Baseball action continues exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego as the Padres continue their series with San Francisco, 6.30 Tuesday. From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse, go behind the headlines and sports pages and get to know the real people who don the Padres' uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego. There's a rumor that San Diego is home to one of the most brilliant, insightful, and educational culinary TV shows ever created. And then, there's my show.
but it's big in taste and small in effort. Sam the Cooking Guy, Sundays at 5.30 and 7 p.m., only on Channel 4 San Diego. Healthy living. It's something we all care about, and it's even more important to us as we raise our families. And this is Ethel Herbert, Your Majesty. Ethel was in charge of catering for today's garden party. much enjoyed your cucumber sandwiches how does one go about making those frank's red hot sauce your majesty i put that on everything i say frank's red hot sauce goes on anything it's aged cayenne peppers add real flavor to tacos pizza wings pasta chicken steaks chili even once cucumber sandwiches frank's red hot i put that on everything denny's mac and cheese big daddy patty melt makes me feel like i'm at the end of a rainbow
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Spurred Bird Surf Shed with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Tuesday morning, brought to you by Guayaquil Yerba Mate. Today we're looking at a decrease in the surf, and we're looking at some trippy weather. Overcast, cloudy skies, real tropical-like, with some rain falling as well. Pretty consistent rain over the evening, not a whole lot of it, but just steady little drops out there, so be careful driving. Surf-wise, decrease in swell out there, too. West, north, west, wind, swell, ground, swell combo, about as big as that old south that continues to taper off. Surf down in that knee to waist-high zone on average. Chest high with a rare plus at the areas most open to that swirl combination. Beach breaks looking to be your better bet right now. There is some light and variable winds, so you have to kind of be careful where you're going to go right now. Not that windy at all, but not to put a little pump on it. Reef breaks really need that tide to drop out before they show some signs of life. Water temperature taking a big-time hit anywhere in the upper 50s to very low 60s, so pay attention to that. Pack the wetsuit that's appropriate for your needs. For up-to-the-minute surf reports and forecasts, go to surfline.com. And for surfboard restoration and repair needs, you go see Joe Roper. The Authentic Surf Report can be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report.
Sorry to be the one to have to tell you. Oh, my God. And now back to The Mikey Show. With Mikey. He sees the word wonderful. Again. I'm 40. It's okay. Woods. Your boy gets in the shower and I have very little hair and I have to condition, of course, because it smells so good and it feels so good when you condition. Lauren. When I have to say smart things on the spot, I'm like... And Jay. Please grow up on FM 94.9. Hello, baby. That's what I'm saying. A lot of kids going back to school today. Yeah. My five-year-old begins kindergarten. And this is something that I can 100% say I've never experienced. I've never experienced my child going to kindergarten until today. How does it make me feel? Worried as all get up. Now, most parents, when you send your kid off to kindergarten, you're worried anyway. I'm worried because, you know, Jake's got his issues and I'm just hoping everything goes fine.
We'll see. Now, The Mikey Show, as always, keeping its thumb on the pulse of, well, dating. Do we? Yeah, I think so. Well, we certainly did with Chris. We set him up on a date. He's our phone screener. He's 22. Tall, dark, and handsome. Angel. Angel. Sent him out on a date. And the date went well. In fact, the date went so well with this girl, Perry, that they... had brunch together yesterday wow how did that go that went great just as comfortable yeah okay because it was very comfortable that was the thing they had a very uh good rapport with each other at the at the ball game on friday night we all went to a uh ball game on friday night and it was a good time and what we were saying right before we went to break was that
We didn't know where he was. He was a little bit late and he was a little bit late and that was because she got off work at six o'clock. Right. And they show up and they immediately kind of go off on their own. Right. And then they were kind of leaving in between innings. Right. We didn't know where they would go. It reminded me. Did you ever bring a date to a family barbecue or anything like that? That's what it reminded me of. Yes. Your family's there, and you know they're going to mortify you. Yes. So you bring a date, and you're like, all right, we got our plates, and we'll be over here under the tree. Dude. We'll be under the tree. Greatest call in the world. Yeah. That's exactly what it was. Did that a hundred times. Yes. Did you get some of the macaroni? Yeah, yeah, we got it. We got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's fine. She's fine. She's fine. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. No, she doesn't like beans. She's fine. She's hideous. God. Is that enough for her? It's fine for her. God. Don't say macaroni. Mom. Stop saying macaroni salad. Yeah, your famous baked beans. They're hideous, first of all. Number two, I don't want her to eat beans. Hideous? She's going to fart. Stephen, what kind of a word is that for my food? Don't call me Stephen. She knows me as words. Gosh. You're killing me. So it was like that. It was great. They had fun. Now, they got up and left a million times and then at the end of the night,
We get up. We all leave. And I get a text from Cross that says, because we didn't know where they were. They've been gone for a while at this point. I had mistaken a 65-year-old man for Chris. That's true. That's true. You did not. Chris! Is that Chris? By the way, that's a true story. We were walking out of the building of Petco. And L.O.B. sees a human that she thought resembled Chris. I convinced myself because I was so worried about Chris. We didn't know where he was. Scared to death. And she goes, Chris! I think I saw Chris! Turns out it was just a person. Guy walks right by. He walks right by. And then I go, hey, Chris! Chris! Chris! Chris! The guy didn't turn around. Which turned into every person that I saw. I was like, Chris? Are you Chris? 65-year-old gray-headed woman. You're Chris, right? Are you okay, Chris? Tell me you're good. Chris texted and said, oh yeah, you know, we didn't realize you guys had left. And I said, well, enjoy the suite because they still had tickets to go back by themselves to the suite because we'd all left. I think it was all planned.
And then he said that they tried to get it out on the field or something? Yeah. When we were leaving, the reason that we're gone so long at the end is because we were walking outside. We wanted to ask where the best place to see the fireworks were because we were going to stay for the fireworks. And this person said, just follow this line. And all these people were going down. We had no idea why we were following this line. And I guess when we got down to the bottom, it was a bunch of people that were about to go on the field. Yeah. So they had wristbands on. We saw that. So we were just waiting for a little bit. And then we came back up and you guys were going. You hung at the suite for a little while, and then you left. And we watched the fireworks, and then we left. From the suite, you watched them. Oh, cool. Nice move. All to themselves. All to themselves. It was pretty cool. I know she's listening. Please call, Perry. Isn't there an overhang, though? You couldn't really see it all the way up in the sky? We had to go down a little bit below. No, you could see it. Actually, there were low fireworks. Yeah. Did you kiss her? Oh, my God. I wasn't going to ask. I wasn't going to ask. I wasn't going to do it. I wasn't going to ask. I wasn't going to ask. They didn't. No tongue. Maybe they did not. Oh, my gosh. No. She's a pretty girl. I really, I think she is very, very pretty. I loved her. She's pretty blue eyes. She's so sweet. Perfect for Chris. You guys are a good match. What if they get married? Oh, my God. What if they get married? Before me. L.O.B.'s got a one-track mind. I'm sure they will. Before me. L.O.B.! Who won't? All right. Exactly. Jasper will be married. I know.
M1 Dave from OB, what was the word of the day? Oh, sorry. What was the word of the day? Dom was the word of the day. You're going to see the Foo Fighters hang in the line, okay? So... So they're getting married. Please call in, Perry. Perry, call in. I want to talk to Perry. Do you know if she is planning on talking with us? I think she would. I think she's working right now. She's working? Oh, wow. Chris knows the whole routine now. He's like, but she's got a break in 20, so. I left a note on her car this morning on the way in. That's a bad note. It used to be romantic. It's not anymore. Listen, they got along. Why does he have to play some game? They got along. Yeah, he doesn't. Yeah, well, according to Woods. Don't you? I would have liked to see... Here's my two cents. No, shut it. Really? I would have liked to seen a little more touching, like a little more light petting. He kept saying that? Yeah, yeah. Every single time. I would have liked to see a little... I saw Chris Sunday at the Del Mar Fairgrounds, and I asked him, I was like, how did everything go now that we're gone? And he told me that they had a second date, and I said, you listen to me. You be yourself. You don't listen to woods. Don't listen to woods.
Yeah, I mean, if you want to close business, don't listen to me. That's for sure. No, you be yourself. He's not trying to, quote, close business. Aren't we all out there, Mike? Maybe we're trying to just meet someone and enjoy their company. They're getting married. They are not getting married. Wow. So Woods kept coming over. Okay, so let's talk about the thing that happened. There's a whole... Damn it! What is the biggest thing that happened Friday night? Why me? Yeah, why you, really? Why you? Why me? I've thought about it, and I've thought, do I tell the story? Does Jay tell the story, or does Woods tell the story? I've decided Jay is going to tell this story. Yeah. Good move. So there we are, sitting at the game. Woods to my left, Kim to my right. Kim's your wife. Kim's my wife. And we're just hanging out, having a good time.
Somebody else walks in the suite. I'm not even sure who it was at this point. He seems irritated by it, though. Yeah, he's inferior. Somebody's grabbing food that is not going to be able to go into his belly. So I stand up. I stand up to go shake hands with this person. Woods follows pretty closely behind. Kim kind of stays seated. Woods fumbles his spit cup and pours it all over Kim's back. Over Kim's, his wife, Jay's wife. Over on her back. On her back, on her arm. And it is just gooey. It's viscous. Viscous. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. It's like Pennzoil. Oh, my gosh. It's grainy Pennzoil. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, all over the seat. All over the floor. She froze. She did. It was just on her nice. It was a nice sweater. Nice sweater she had on. Beautiful, smooth hair. Later on, we also found it on her shirt. On her blouse that she had on as well. Brand new. Brand new one as well. Oh, gosh. I'm sure I'll get a bill. Dry cleaning. Knowing Jay, I'm sure I'll get a bill with a receipt. Oh, yeah. No, no, no, no. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. Now, how long was it after that happened that I came along? Like a minute, probably. I walked over and...
I don't remember who told me first. Jay did. Who else? Oh, guess what Woods just did. Yep. Like a four-year-old. Starts like this. Oh. Well. Oh. And I said, what? And when you told me, for a second, my brain started to tell itself, that can be true. That can't be true. That cannot be a true story. But then I looked at Kim, and all I had to do was look at her to know, uh-oh. It's true. Yeah. Woods spilled his spit cup full of Copenhagen spit. A lot of it. She was so mad. Oh, gosh. That makes me. That makes me. Oh, gosh. She was not that mad. She was not mad. She didn't seem it. You were mad. I wasn't mad at all. She said to me, Jay's making a bigger deal of it. Of course. And he needs to. Of course. Because it was me. And then Woods posted on my.
My Facebook page. I can't remember what you wrote. I said, I'm sorry. Tell Kim I'm sorry and I will pay for dry cleaning. You were so attacking. How's that attacking? Please tell Kim R. Isbell that I am sorry and I will pay for her dry cleaning. So it was Kim R. Isbell that got you? This is the time. It's not a time to mess around. That's what we always do. The Isabel family does not like the addition of the R middle. Especially Kim. She hates the R. But we do it with everybody. We do it with everyone. We do it with every human. It wasn't special. It wasn't like we picked it. It's not, you know. I've said it from the beginning. I got it from Edward R. Murrow. Right. That's where it comes from. Normally, whenever I apologize, I call in person. Oh, Jay. Well, when I do something wrong. Jay does not like. the writing bit. He likes a phone call. Which, by the way, I wrote Jay. I wrote Jay and I was going to apologize to Jay because I did this thing that I wanted to turn out differently where he didn't have control of his microphone. What I wanted was exactly what I had at the old station. It didn't turn out that way and Jay wanted to take my head off. He was hurt by it and I didn't. He was sad. Now, I wrote
a very heartfelt because i apologized to him but i wanted to explain it to him so i wrote and i deleted it i deleted it took a lot of work to write it but i deleted it because i i go as good as this is and as much as this expresses my feelings about his microphone he likes the in person even though when i do it in person i'm gonna fail right I'm going to fail at explaining to him where my head is at. I thought you did a good job when we talked about it. It isn't enough. I could tell when you saw me Friday night, you still couldn't stand my bones. It's better on the phone, at least. Email's the worst. I hate... There's so much... Everybody expresses themselves differently. Jay is much better at expressing himself in person than he would be if you told him to write his feelings out. I'm much better at writing my feelings out than I am in person. But his love language... is for me to do it in person. Therefore, I'll do it in person. Now, he... Kim, I don't have Kim's number. I would have sent her a text. I don't have her number because I'm not a creep. I would have too. But I would have sent her a text. I have your wife's phone number. And he has my wife's phone number and does text her until I try to put a stop to it. Right. Yeah, we text all the time. I know.
But no, I did write an apology on his page. On my Facebook page. He took it as something else. He took it as bad? How about an email? I guess. I would have just gone even email. I mean, it's an accident, so it's not... I offered to pay and stuff, and I will. The fact that you allowed people to comment and stuff made it less... It made it more like a joke. No, it wasn't a joke to me. I was very upset at myself for doing... How can you be upset? Because I'm like, gosh darn, maybe they're right. Maybe they really can't take me anywhere. I was bummed about it. But it was an accident. Honestly, Woods, after it happened, she was never even mentioning it. No, I know. She told me. She goes, oh, he's done that before to me. And I've drank his dip spit before. Man, it was horrible. I had one of these cups that would sit on the dash of your truck. It was shaped to sit there. And turn the corner. a little too fast to the whole thing. And it was not just one dip. No, it was a week's worth. It was a week's worth. And it was like the whole dip. It just poured in her lap. It was all across her face. She has bad luck. God. She has bad luck. She can't escape men that chew. The next day, she pretty much laid it out. You're done dipping. I'm like, no, no, no, I'm not done. You're done. She made him quit. You're done dipping. Oh, well, I tried to make Wood stop dipping when I accidentally drank his spit cup. Yeah, it didn't stop. And that did not stop. He's chewing right now.
As we speak. Very pungent. I felt bad for Woods. I felt bad for Woods and Kim. I didn't feel bad for Jay. If we just take Jay out of the equation, that would have been fine by me. I felt bad for Kim. I lovingly wiped her back with napkins. Nice bet. Lovingly cleaned her sleeve and her hands. You did everything you could. I did. I was in full-on panic mode. And you were sincere. I used no less than 400 Padres napkins. And I'm not kidding you. 400. Jay walked out with, like, a devilish grin, and Kim said to me, it's really not that bad. Jay's just making a big deal out of it. Of course. Of course he is. He loves to make words. I feel awful. Is this Tim Harrison? Yes, it is. Hi, Tim. How are you? Listening to your conversation, then I'm a little grossed out. Hey, listen, you've faced worse, or have you? I've probably faced worse, but I didn't put that in my mouth. Let me give people the website. The elephant in the living room dot com. There are places in America where you need to have a dog license for your dog. That's a true story. There are no laws that say anything about a Bengal tiger in your backyard. And nobody knows that better than Tim Harrison. This is an actual movie that's out right now. And people can legally own some of these animals.
And the movie centers around Tim. Right, Tim? And you kind of going into these houses. And what? Trying to stop people from doing this? Well, it starts off, too. I actually go in and do some interventions with people that have dangerous exotic animals. Lions, tigers, and bears are wise, what I say. But cobras, alligators, crocodiles. But also catch them when they're loose. Because we have one right now in Dayton, Ohio. We have a guy turned a black leopard loose here in our city. It's out in a wooded area. We're trying to hunt it down now and try to catch it. You haven't caught it. You haven't caught it? It'll take a while before we get there. I have to keep spotting it with the tracks. The first snow will probably be the best thing if we can't get it before then. But it happens almost on a weekly basis now across the country. What is it surviving on, you think? Oh, it can survive on cats and dogs. In fact, behind this residence, there used to be a lot of feral cats. There's no feral cats. We went out with the infrared cameras and just shined them through the night, and we couldn't even find a squirrel. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Wow. And you've actually found people that had lions. Oh, lots of lions, lots of tigers. In fact, in Texas, there's 3,400 permitted tigers in Texas by alone that people have in their homes that they know of. That's more than they have in India. They've only got 1,400 left in India. So we've got more in Texas, and we've got thousands across the country. Tim, I've been to, my name's Steve Woods, and I am from Texas, and I went to a tiger rescue that they had in Texas where there were probably...
50 tigers, including two from Mike Tyson. Are you serious? Him and his crew came and dropped off two tigers to this tiger rescue. You can feed them. We got to feed them chicken bone. Chicken. It's the coolest thing ever, but obviously not for them. Tim, how come the lions don't turn into lions and eat their people that have them? Because when you get the extras on the DVD, it actually shows Lambert, the big 500-pound lion that escaped from Terry Brumfield, the other gentleman in the film. And chase cars on the interstate. That's how we got involved with that call. Holy cow. Oh, yeah. You listen to the 911 call. If anybody's listening, get on the elephant in the living room dot com and just check out the movie trailer. You hear that 911 call. I think I have it. I think I have it. Hang on a second. Let me play this. Let me play this. Hang on. Wow. Freaking crazy. Is it the first one or the second one? First one. I'm on 23 and there's a lion in the room. 11 square root.
A lion? It's a lion. Seriously, like an attack to someone's car? When I leave to go out, especially when I'm a venomous snake or one of these big predators, my wife always gives me an extra hug because she's been around this for a long time. She realizes this isn't a game. This is for real. Crap. Oh, my gosh. Well, that's just one call. We get numerous calls for people. Everything from being constricted by pythons to all kinds of unbelievable stuff. But with this lion here, it actually got loose. It was a makeshift cage. People don't know how to handle it. But that lion ended up, we actually have it caught on film. First time ever where an animal, like a big cat or a bear, turns on their owner. They always call it turn it. Well, Chris Rock said it beautifully. He's not an expert, but he said it beautifully. The comedian, he got that tiger that Roy had out there.
And Las Vegas didn't turn on him. That tiger just went tiger. That's true. He went tiger. That's true. Tigers aren't supposed to be doing circus acts. They're supposed to be attacking and killing things. That's what they're made for. Theelephantinthelivingroom.com is the website. And the movie is the same name, right? Yeah, same name. And it's a perfect name for this film because there's something big in the room. And you also see during that year and eight-month period that Mike was with us. there was an elephant taken out of a garage in Macy, Indiana. Oh, my gosh. And I'm working with two elephants right now, one in New York and one in Maine. It's crazy. How? How do they get them? How do they get them? Oh, it's easy. And what you'll see on the film, you'll see me get on these classified ads. You can get them at auctions. What you'll see is go undercover in exotic animal auctions. The guy's buying a hyena. You can buy anything you want and walk out with it. Hey, Tim. Get on the Internet. Hey, Tim. Buy them off the Internet. Tim, I was supposed to get a copy of the movie because I wanted to watch the movie before I talked to you, but it still is good. Can I get a copy? Because I'm dying to see this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll have Elliot take care of our PR guy. He'll make sure you get one. I guarantee it. Guaranteed. Okay, well, one question before we let you go. Okay. Have you been bit? I have never been mauled or bitten by a big cat. I've been bitten by monitor lizards, things like that, but nothing like a big cat or venomous snake. No venomous snakes. Knock on wood. And watch the movie trailer. You'll see a tiger run across the parking lot, a 400, 500-pound tiger, and just bang, nail me. But I know how to handle myself and try to be as safe as possible. I respect the wildlife. It's not man versus nature.
It's man with nature, and it's a new kind of thing I'm trying to bring back to the people. Thank you. It's Tim Harrison. Thank you a lot, man. TheElephantInTheLivingRoom.com. Thank you, Tim. Oh, I want to see that. Thank you. Oh, I want to see it so bad. Oh, that is so freaky. Let's see. L-O-B, I don't know how you're going to handle this. If our midday DJ, Hillary, were here, and I don't know if you're listening, Hillary. I don't know how you're going to feel about this montage of old commercials that I have. I mean, old 1950s commercials. Wait until you hear what commercials used to sound like and just ask yourself as you listen, hmm, I wonder how that would fly today. Ah, the good old days. Ah, the good old days. We'll play that when we come back. Pop it in. Turn it on. Be a part of the Mikey Show now.
Call 570-1949 or text 949-MIKEY at GMS is the Mikey Show. More coming up on FM 94.9. This is the sound of Jim creating an online store for his business. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Access denied. What is this? This is David building his online store with Chase's new Instant Storefront. And move that over there. Jim. Oh, what did I just do? David. That was easy. Introducing Instant Storefront. An all-new e-commerce solution that gives small business owners everything they need to sell products online. And best of all, customer payments can be deposited into your Chase business checking account often on the next business day. So you can reach more customers and keep your cash flow flowing. Act now and try Instant Storefront free for three months. Visit chase.com slash storefront to get started. Instant Storefront. Take a step forward and chase what matters.
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Only good financial media station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't like it when it's cheap. Lauren. I was a bit of a pyro when I was a kid. Woods. I haven't moisturized for days. Dying. And Jay. I'm an awesome beer drinker on the course. On FM 94.9. Woods, we can talk about it, but I want people to know that I'm going to sell. Are you? Yes. Are you? Are you? Are you? Yes, I am. Yes, I am. Yes, I am. Yes, I am. At the Sunspeed. We're going to play you the viral video that's going around right now of the commercials from yesteryear. In just a moment, Woods really wants me to discuss how I just got... Oh, gosh. I almost want to turn Jay's mic off. See? Knew you'd want to. He's like a dad. Oh, yeah. He is. That's not why I got it. Gosh.
Just start it with how you started it this morning with L.O.B. and I. Do you remember something about that you have no more of for the rest of the year? I don't have any allowance. Weird. For the rest of the year? No. There's only three months left in the year. And you're way overdrawn in that account, I think. Yes. Yes. Every account. So your wife put the hammer down. I haven't actually gotten an allowance since February. Holy smokes. I wish there was one person that would just say, well, Mike. Let's hear what you have to say. And, you know, after all, it is your allowance. Yeah, let's hear. You know, if you'd like to squander it, that's your, you know. But you squandered it. Prerogative. It's been squandered. Technically, you already have. But here's the rule, okay? The rule is that I get a biweekly allowance. Biweekly? Yeah, every two weeks. Oh, wow. I get paid every two weeks. Okay, from the missus. Yeah, my wife allots an amount to give to me to play within my allowance.
If she didn't do that, I would just spend willy nilly. And so what I started to do was I would run out of allowance. And so if I wanted something, I would have to say, I want to borrow against my allowance. Yeah. She would say, OK, fine. You're not going to start getting an allowance again until July. Right. OK, then we'd get close to July. I would get something. She said, OK, but you're putting it out to October now. That's where we were. until this weekend, and now we're done for the year. Now, she said to me, at what point does it stop? I said, at year's end. It has to stop at year's end. I cannot go beyond one year's time, December, okay? So you actually owe now. No, I don't. I'm done. Because I was, starting in October, going to start getting an allowance again. I no longer get, that won't happen. So at the end of the year, you start fresh? But you're not getting anything until then. Yes, well, technically it'll be the beginning of the year, of next year, of 2012. Oh my. So what'd you get? Another camera. What was so good that you had to have this weekend? Another keyboard, laptop, video camera, iPad 5. Does it matter, by the way? Yeah, it matters. It does? Why? It's my allowance. Because we can gauge the crazy. An elliptical. You know that's not true.
You got that bike you were talking about. Oh, yeah, the bike. Yeah, the bike. You wanted to start bike riding, you said. That's right. So you did go with the bike. Yeah, good job. Good for you, man. Man, what'd you get? I'm staying silent. Your silence is deafening. Your silence hurts my soul. I'm sorry. What did you get? A camera. Oh, gosh. What in the world? Don't hurt me with your eyes. Why? How many cameras does one guy need? You don't even use your other cameras. All I see in Lauren's eyes right now is the judgmental eyes of a mother saying, you loser. It's got to be waterproof. Oh, no. Wait, you got that one. Oh, yeah. It's got to be the one with the most megapixel. Oh, nope. You already got that one. Oh, it hurts. This is going to shoot black and white film because that's all you're missing. Ow! Ow! Did you have Chris take a picture with your blue camera on Friday?
Yes. He did it himself. To prove that that picture, that camera wasn't enough, so you'd have to get a new one. Okay, okay, okay. Oh my gosh, he was scheming from the get-go. You were scheming. Friday after the show. No, I was not. I wasn't. I'm being honest with you. It's the only picture you've taken on that thing. That was a really random thing that you did. It is. It was random. We've never seen it. Random. I'm telling you the truth. I'm telling you the truth. Please, please believe me. I'm telling you the truth. Okay. My new bit was... Those pictures don't get put up fast enough for my liking, and I'm trying to take on this new thing, which is I'm going to start doing things my way, even though it may rustle feathers. Okay? The pictures don't go up by the end of the show. No, they don't. Every day. No, they don't. They go on Jay's page. Maybe they go on your personal page. That's because I don't have admin rights. Oh, cool. Well, happy birthday. Listen. You put one beaver up on there. Exactly. Exactly. Yes. He used to have admin privileges to our Mikey Facebook page, and he started putting filthy pictures up, and I stopped him from being an admin. There's just something I said. I understand, Jay. So wait, now we got to rely on you to put those pictures up every time. Dude, it went up, boom, right after the show. The first time. Hello. You see this right here? We'll see. See this investment that I bought on Amazon.com? Yeah. It's called a card reader. It's an investment.
We have, like, all kinds of card readers. Yeah. We can get them from engineering. We have 20 of them. They provide them to us. So Friday. So on Fridays. L.A.B. makes a good point. I did something different. I said, hey, Chris, can you use my camera and take a picture of the live studio audience? Because I want to make sure the pictures are going up. Boom. Bam. Jay says that they are. Apparently they are. They're going on his page. Right. And we post a link over. Well, I've not seen them on the fan page. My thing does a janky deal where I don't see stuff sometimes. It's true. Okay, anyway. Anyway. So, what was it? I'm trying to think what it was. There was something that facilitated me getting a new camera. Boredom? No, listen to me. Amazon. What was it? The deal of the day on Amazon. Yeah. Crazy pills. Crazy pills. Or they're a lot like crazy pills, but they're different. They're like orange pills? Yes, but crazy. Lemon pills. Okay. Whatever it was, you guys know that I'm fascinated by the Panasonic Lumix. Oh, I didn't know that. Really? Now I know. Isolate that. I'm very infatuated with the Panasonic Lumix camera. L.O.B., I think we've established that I'm a different kind of bird. You've got to rub it in. That's unbelievable. Listen. So, I don't know what it was, but I saw that they had...
A camera. Now, hang on. Hang on. To my defense. I didn't like the camera that I had. Girl, how drunk is it? I didn't like it. I didn't like it. I thought I was going to like it. Because it said it made people's teeth white. Oh, my goodness. And so I thought I was going to like it for that reason. Maybe you just make friends with people who brush their teeth. Yeah. You don't leave it up to the camera. Wow. That's a good point. That's a good point. But here's the deal. I know you were. I know you were. So listen to me. So I gave the old camera that I had. I gave it to my wife. And I liked it, but I thought that the new camera I was getting was going to be better. Well, as it turned out, the pictures were a turd. I didn't like the pictures. I never voiced this to you, by the way. I never voiced it to anybody because I knew what I would get. I was afraid. I was afraid to share it. That I didn't like the photographs.
And so what did I do? I tried to make the photographs better. I couldn't. I couldn't make them better. Why? Because the lens was a turd. It was a turd. But you were sacrificing a lens, I found out later, for teeth whitening. So that would explain why you have been adding effects to all of your pictures the last couple months. Yes. Okay. You realize... Is there something deeper there? Are you trying to tell me something deeper there? No, I just... That I'm missing on, like, am I over-affecting pictures? What am I missing? I know that you're... I just wondered if you got, like, a new program or something. No. Turns out you were just trying to manipulate them. The cameras that you're buying, you're buying these. What is the megapixel now? I actually went backwards. I actually went backwards. The picture's like 300 by 600 by the time you posted on there. I understand. Very low quality. I actually went backward in pixels. It's a better camera. It's going to take photographs that I enjoy. What is it about the camera that's going to be better? It doesn't use a little turdy lens. That's about the lens on the one that I had. Here was why I liked the last one. Touch screen and teeth whitening. Well, it had a small little pinhole sized lens to get your teeth white and to touch screen. Now I'm going back to a lensed camera. Now, my wife said to me and she waited a day. What did you get? I resented it. As soon as I heard the question, I resented it. I didn't want to answer it.
I didn't want to answer. Why? Same reason I didn't want to bring it up here. But I knew you guys were going to see a new camera soon. And I needed to divulge the information. I wonder where we'll see it since you take one picture every six months. Wait, yeah. Is it here today? It's not a true story. No. Oh, no. Is it at home? No. And there could be a studio? Oh, it's coming in the mail. It's coming in the mail. It's coming in the mail. Oh, boy. It's really going to change the way you take photos in here. Yeah, for sure. All the photos that you take. All of them. You take so many pictures. I don't always take photos here. Dude, that's like me buying a drill. Seriously. It's not. It is. A really nice drill. You never use a drill outside the studio. You've never even picked up a drill. That's a true statement. I pick up a camera. I take a lot of pictures outside of the studio. A lot. Yes. Oh, gosh.
It's true. It's true. Hey, Crapdad, I haven't seen too many pictures of your kids. I took some this weekend, Jay. No, you didn't. I did. I went to Legoland. No, you didn't. You took them with your iPhone. Yeah, you took them with your iPhone, Crapdad. I actually took the photographs at Legoland this weekend with the old camera. I did. A lot of pictures of Luke. Yep. A lot of pictures of Luke. Favorite son. Just Luke. The good son. Ryan wasn't available. Wasn't he? Too busy being a kid? Dear Diary, today I'm going to get another camera. I'm so excited for my camera that I spilled enchilada sauce all over my keyboard. How dare you? So now I'm behind another keyboard because I need more than one keyboard to keyboard things. I hear you. How dare you? Wait a minute. Oh, gosh. Yes, it's me. It's a keyboard. Oh, my gosh. My heart just stops. Gosh.
Holy crap. That was brilliant, Jay. Just let me be me. Yeah, just laying nude in a bed full of cameras. Just everywhere. Ah, finally. I don't know. Why do you collect things? Annie Leibowitz doesn't have as many cameras as you do. Arthur Polaroid. Seriously. She's like, Mike, you really don't need 40. I'm Annie Leibowitz. I have two cameras. I have my one for fun and one for work. But I work. I'm a photographer. Do you want to hear a true story? This is a true story. Three hours yesterday. Three hours I spent on YouTube watching videos on this camera. My wife walked into the room at one point and she goes, are you watching a film about elves? Because the music sounded like that. And I said, yes, I'm watching a movie about elves. And she goes, are the elves like dancing interlocked at the elbow? And I said, yes, the elves are dancing and they're interlocked at the elbows. It's a fair question. I was going to answer yes, as long as she didn't ask, what are you watching? Really?
which was reviews of the new camera that I just bought, I was willing to answer yes to every question she had. So you watched the videos after the purchase? Yes. And realized I probably should have gone for a different camera, but I should have done more research. So now this one isn't even good. I'll wait. Yes, you will, until January at least. You don't have a choice. You're going to sell that old one? Are you on what? I'll sell it. Where? Sell.com. On Craig Bay or E-Craig. E-List. Craig's Bliss. You're going to love this. It's a Sunday morning and you're going to get a call from a guy that wants a camera. And you go, yeah, where are you? And he's like, I live in PB. And you're like, cool. And you're like, well, this is where I live. I live in North County. Can you meet me at that Chevron in Encinitas? And you'll agree upon $300, and then you'll show up and say, I only have $225. Will you take that? And you'll feel stuck, and you'll go. Maybe just give me the camera. Just give it to Jay. Yeah, I'll say, as long as you don't sexually assault me, yeah. Let's eBay it. Sure. Because I am a tattooed, bald-headed Mexican that's actually afraid you're going to sexually assault me. Because that's all I think about Craigs Bay.
Is that on Craigs Bay, it's sexual assault land. It's not. It's not. Yeah, I'd like that camera. I saw it on Craigslist. Is this Mike? Yeah, it is. It sure is. Mike, can you meet me tonight to get the camera? And Jay said, this is fine. This is fine. They said they do it all the time. It's fine. Yeah, I can. Yes, I can. I can meet you. Where should I meet you? Okay, can we meet somewhere in... No. Okay, because I live in North County. What was that noise? What was that noise? I said, dude, it's a safe. Okay, I'll meet you in Chula Vista. Where would you like to meet? At a park? Can we meet at a... Hey, I tell you what. Can we meet inside of a Denny's? What was that noise? What was that? Nothing. Well, Jay and LLB and Wood said this is fine, and they do it all the time. Okay, and you've got the $300? I got it, buddy.
I got it real good. I got it real good. Did you know my name? It says anonymous. 6, 7, 4, 5, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 7, 8. I come home. My wife's like, why are you crying? Just leave me alone. A lot's changed, huh? Why do you still have the camera? I didn't want to buy it. Where's the money? I didn't want to buy it. I bought a router from some guy in Lemon Grove at like 10 o'clock at night. Oh, my God. I know. Lauren. That's how you wind up on the news. Lauren O'Brien. Showing around in the cul-de-sac. Which one are you? What? Oh, my God. No freaking way. Yeah. It's a couple of years ago. Oh, my gosh. He's in a robe. Yeah. Tucked back real good. Yeah. He sent someone out, ran out to the car. Oh, my God. So. Yeah. Yeah, just keep driving. Keep driving. Okay, so I see there's a van in one of these driveways. Do you have a van or do you have like a sedan? I have a van. Okay, is that where you live? Yeah, all the other houses have their lights on. Oh, okay. Yours is the dark one? Yeah, but I have the porch light on, so it's the one with the porch light that's lit up. Okay, so are you going to meet me out front?
I actually am bound to a wheelchair and can't. So when you come to the door, just ring the doorbell and you'll hear Precious, my dog. I'm walking up now. Is this all the ones with like the moths and the butterflies? Yeah, it's the ones with the moths and the butterflies. Is it like a moth problem? Don't touch any of those. Maybe you should turn your porch light off. Don't you touch those moths, lady. Oh, gosh. Maybe I don't either. Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. Anybody else? Hello? You still want to buy the router, right? Why do you have those weird goggles on? I have a problem seeing you tonight. Can I turn the light on? I can't believe you, Lauren. Lauren, you got more rocks than I would ever have. I'm afraid to meet somebody in the broad daylight at a Chevron. And the Chevron is somehow magically put in the middle of a train station. I'm afraid that I will be sexually assaulted. Chloroform. Chloroform.
I told you. It was a different world back then. Was it? No, it was a year ago. That's when the Craigslist killer was on the loose. It was before that. Did you actually go up and ring the doorbell? No, I called and he sent a girl out. She ran out to the car. We made the exchange and I drove away. Hello? I'll be right there. It's 10 o'clock at night. Do you have the router? My gosh. One time I bought a medicine cabinet off Craigslist, but I didn't realize you'd have like a cutout in your wall. Oh, my gosh. Bought this medicine cabinet and I was like, oops, when I got home. How are we just finding this out? I would have told that story on the first day. First day. Oops. L.O.B. Okay. A million questions when we come back. When we come back. Text them at 949mikey at gmail.com. More from The Mikey Show coming up on FM 94.9. This is the FM.
Hey, it's Hillary with some shows for you to go check out. This Wednesday and Thursday night, Big Sonic Chill presents two nights of Fevery Corporation at House of Blues. Also Thursday night, it's the SD Music Thing kickoff party at the Casbah with Telekinesis. And Thursday night at Porter's Pub, Atari Teenage Riot. Friday night, you can see the AgriLights with Bucko 9 at the Belly F. And on Sunday the 11th, it's an FM 94.9 about the music show with Givers at the Casbah. Kills will play House of Blues also on the 11th and still to come this year. Switchfoot at Petco Park, TV on the radio with Arctic Monkeys, Bush, Portugal the Man, Peter Bjorn and John, Blitz and Trapper with Dawes, The Pains of Being Pure at Heart, that's in about the music show. Also, Cut Copy, The Naked and Famous, Colts, Black Joe Louis and the Honey Bears, The Boxer Rebellion, and a rescheduled company of thieves shows. There you have it. Get out there and see some shows. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 concert calendar online at FM949SD.com. Monthly payment calculation assumes 5% down.
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Well, these wet roads are causing a lot of problems this morning. Market Street northbound ramp to the 15, an accident on the right shoulder. Bayview Heights Way westbound ramp to the 94, an accident that right lane's blocked. And as you make your way into La Mesa, the 94 westbound Lemon Grove Avenue, an accident over on the right shoulder. This report brought to you by Sig Alert. Rush hour is brutal going in, coming home. So before you get on the road, log on to sigalert.com. Track your commute, see the exact speeds along the way. That's sigalert.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94. I hate to get up in the morning. And now back to the Mikey Show. Oh, yeah. Mikey. I'm in love with Woods. Yeah, that's it. Woods. I'm so lonely. Lauren. I'm a lyricist. And Jay. Hey, I like to skateboard. On FM 94.9. So I saw not played. First of all, you don't know why Soldier Boy in the military is mad at Soldier Boy. I'll tell you. Also, I'm going to get to. Woods of wisdom, I'm going to get to this thing that's going to make L.O.B. and Hillary crazy. It's commercials all weave together from about one specific topic from the past in television, TV commercials. But first, L.O.B. told us right before I went to break, L.O.B. used Craigslist. No problem using Craigslist. Had good luck using Craigslist. Scares me because I think every time somebody's going to, you know, be a whack job.
Right before we went to commercial, LOB tells us I bought a medicine cabinet on Craigslist. Didn't realize I needed a cutout. Okay. The didn't realize I needed a cutout is so secondary to me. I mean, third, fourth, fifth. It's eighth and dairy. That's probably third to me. Yeah. Third. Third. It's probably third. To be. Honest, third. The third thing I'm most interested in is the fact that she didn't know that she needed a cutout. Right. Did it just stick to the wall? Right. I didn't really think about it. But before that, my question is, did you go, gosh darn it, I'm in the market for a medicine cabinet. And then go out and look and go, they're just too much. And they're not what I'm looking for. Can't find anything. Can't find what I'm looking for. Or did you... Were you on Craigslist looking for something else and happened upon it? I was perusing, and there was a little, like, bamboo. I wanted this little bamboo, like, I don't know what you would call it. Maybe, like, a little tiny bureau sort of thing. Yes. Just to keep things in. That's what you were looking for. No, yeah, I was just, no. I wasn't even looking for anything in particular. I was just perusing. Where did the bureau thing come from? It was in Craigslist, in furniture.
And I was just looking at things. Like I would put like a max of $100 and I would say, what can I get from Craigslist? Really? Okay. I would put an area so I'd look, you know, see what people in my neighborhood had. Got it. And I found the little hut and then it was a deal if you got it with the medicine cabinet. And I was like, oh my gosh, this is perfect because we don't have a medicine cabinet. All my stuff is just under the sink, falling over all the time. This is a find of the year. Yeah. Not only is it my style. Not only do I get this great bureau, but I also get this medicine cabinet thrown in. I need one. Yeah. Made out of bamboo. Yeah. Hello. So what else do you want to know? What happened next? You called the person? I called the person. He was very nice. Actually, I think now that I think about it, he was like Jay's neighbor because now I know where Jay lives and he was like Jay's neighbor. He had the stuff out in the yard, which was good. I didn't have to go in. He didn't, you know. That's the way to do it. So he had it in the yard. It was broad daylight. Does he tell you, does it say that on Craigslist or did you have to call him to find that out? We never even called. It was all email. It was, here's my address. And I was like, all right, here I go. So I figure if there's like some sort of paper trail. Do you have an appointment? Does he say, hey, look, two o'clock. Got it. Got it. Perfect. Yeah. So I go two o'clock. He's out there. And I was like, oh, perfect. First of all, the medicine cabinet weighed like 50 pounds. Oh, wow. Well, yeah.
Medicine cabinet. Made of bamboo. Yeah. And I was like, cool, thank you so much. So I bring it home and I get it upstairs and then I'm like, huh, jeez. Well, I wonder how you're supposed to hang this thing. Oh, my God. I didn't realize the depth, you know. It goes deep. It's got to go deep. Yeah. Well, I would have thought this. I would have thought I'm going to put this medicine cabinet where the old medicine cabinet was. Replace one. Well, we didn't have one. Our apartment didn't come with one. His and her sinks, no medicine cabinets. No medicine cabinets. So I was just, in my head, I was thinking, yeah, just two long nails out of the wall and then just post it up there. What did you do with it? Sat there. How long? Probably about three months. Oh, wow. Did you lean it against the wall and put medicine in it? I didn't put anything in it. Just sat there, just waiting. How did you finally get rid of it? I made Matt carry it out to the dumpster and put it next to the dumpster. My goodness. I'm surprised you didn't try to flip it. Yes, try to sell it. I think I did. You did, and there were no takers on a bamboo medicine cabinet. It's getting to the point where you can't even sell a gosh darn bamboo medicine cabinet these days. That's where economy's got to. That's sat up there for six months. All right, so here is a montage of, and it's very popular right now.
of commercials dating back to the 50s, and it has to do with coffee. Wonderful anniversary, dear, and thank you for the flowers. You're welcome, darling. But if you could do one thing for me. What? Try to do something about your coffee. I hoped it would be better today. Oh, no. What's wrong? Oh, it's your coffee again. The death sergeant at the station makes better coffee than this. How can such a pretty wife make such bad coffee? Forget the coffee, Marge. It's never very good. I'll get some at the plant. Did you ever see Larry looking so happy? Honey, happiness is a vacation. Away from your coffee. This coffee is criminal. Honey, kill the petunias. Then you admit it. Your coffee really is murder. Honey, your coffee just doesn't taste any good. Darling, I don't know why I keep you around. If it weren't for the sexual intercourse, I'd have divorced you long ago. Your coffee is simply terrible, and that is what you're for. You're a coffee maker, and you iron clothing. I was speechless. I watched this on Friday, and I called my wife over and said, Hey, babe, I want you to check out the good old days here. Real good. You think you got it bad some days? Check that out. Okay? Ain't so bad, is it?
It used to be that women were in charge of the coffee. Oh, big time. That guy came home from work. You know what he wanted? A fresh cup of coffee. A good one. A good one. You guys worked all day. Now, here's what I wondered when I heard it. I thought, what's his reference point? In other words, wife, turd coffee. His mom. His mom. His mom. His parents. See, I thought maybe his time in the service. That could be. That could be. Service, work, and parents. When I fought the Japs, the United States of America gave me coffee that was absolutely delicious, dear. But this garbage that you make each day, well, it's practically killing me. And her attitude is, oh, dear, I'm so sorry. It's shameful. There's one, the one where he said, so you admit it. Your coffee is murder. He is.
No, I watched the video. He's furious. He's no less than one inch from her face with his finger in her face. So you admit it. No, coffee is murder. You dirty criminal. Dude. You are freaking admitting it. Say it. Say the words. I make murderous coffee. Say it. He's got her down in a choke hold on the floor. Say it. He's got his knee on her chest. I make terrible coffee. Say it right now. Say it. Say the words. Dude. Say it or it's your life. I'm telling you. He's got a pistol in her mouth. You say it. Tell me that you make terrible coffee. I make terrible coffee. I knew it. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I make very coffee. I can't hear you. With that pistol in your mouth. I say I make terrible coffee. Here, drink it. Drink it. He's pouring it. Do you like that? You're trying to kill me. You're trying to murder me with your coffee. Dude, I was speechless. I'm like, holy cow, they used to get away with that? Those are commercials, man. I think to myself, if that aired today, there would be letters. Letters?
petitions and campaigns and picket signs. It would be a million woman march on that company. You guys remember watching like Leave it to Beaver, Dennis the Menace, Lassie stuff. I was even like, oh, that seems backwards. And that is, listen, that's how I grew up. I mean, well, my mom, I don't remember mom making coffee. Per se. Maybe she made good coffee and your dad didn't have to complain about it. Maybe that was the deal. That was the deal. It had to be. It had to be. I mean, he would have been like, hey, make this right. I do remember there were no, like dinner, there were certain things back in the 50s, I guess was a prerequisite. And men too. Like men had to do certain things. Right. And they had to do it. Nowadays, a man can stay home and be like, You know, what do you call it? A home dad. A home dad. Not a crap dad, Mike. A home dad. Did not exist. Oh, no, dude. No. A man worked. And he worked at a plant. Yeah. Okay. Or he was a salesman. Yes. And that guy brought home the bacon. That's what he did. That's what he was there to do. They had two kids. And he wanted stuff a certain way when he got home. Yeah. That's why Mr. Mom was a comedy. Right. Can you imagine? Like, the deal used to be dad would come home.
And mom would make him a drink. Scotch. An alcoholic drink. Every day. First thing. That's how it was in my house, except I went out to the refrigerator and got my dad a Coors Light. Was that like your thing? Mm-hmm. You were in charge of that? He drank like half cans, whatever those things were. Remember those? Yeah, of course. They were like half cans. Yeah, my mom piping hot meal. We didn't eat until he came home. That's right. And she had to keep it hot. I love that. Mm-hmm. Even breakfast. Oh, yeah. Same thing. If my dad got up at 4 a.m. to eat. The entire family was sitting at the table at 4 a.m. Why are we all up? Because dad's going to go deer hunting. Okay, let's do this. Wow. Oh, wow. Yeah. Times have changed. Yeah, there weren't, in the 50s, there weren't a lot of fat guys laying around on the couch watching TV while their women went to work. No. You know, hand in their pants watching soaps. Mm-mm. Are there a lot of men that do that? I think so. Well, yeah, I think so, too. Yeah. I think there are. There's two of them in there. You guys watch soap operas? There was no Xbox. So these guys, you know, they weren't smoking weed while their wives went off to work. It's true. Hey, listen, now you have dads that do stay at home and maybe some of them aren't doing much. Right. And the wives can complain about it. Used to be that the wives were the ones that were staying home and they weren't doing much and the husbands would complain about it. When we first started on the air, we talked about this. It was a.
Thing that we found from Good Housekeeping Magazine, I believe, and it was rules for the woman. Rules. And I put them on our refrigerator. That lasted one day. And I did it as a bit, and it was like, listen, when he comes home, don't talk to him. Okay? He's had a rough day. Give him some space to breathe. I'll find him and repost him. Oh, yeah. They're hysterical. Well, they're hysterical because now they appear crazy. Yeah. I'd wake up with a Colombian necktie if I tried to pull those in my house. That's where your wife slits your throat and pulls your tongue right through the hole. Yeah. We got to work harder now, ladies and gentlemen. Right. Got to work harder now. It's progressive. Yes. More money, more problems. Missed the old days. You weren't there. But I hearken for the old days, L.O.B. I don't. L.O.B. brought something up that I... had never experienced, but I found fascinating. LLB interests me. Oh, big time. She's a fascinating gal. She has thoughts that maybe I wouldn't have thought of. One of them was, hey guys, do storms ever ruin people's names for you? Now we said, what do you mean? She said, for instance, Hurricane Irene, if you meet an Irene now, she's kind of going to look at her sideways. I met an Irene and I said, I wanted to say to her,
Look what you did. Oh. Look what you did. That is brilliant. And that is quintessential L-O-B. Yeah. Look what she did, Irene. Look what she did. Oh, your name's Irene? Great. Thanks for wreaking havoc. She knew. I was like, oh. I thought you got a brother named Hugo. Yeah. Yeah. Your sister Katrina. Yeah. Your sister Katrina. A little destructive little bee. All right. Now, wait a minute. Now, now that she brings up Katrina, it would be a little rough. Yeah. If you met someone named Katrina, now I'll tell you, when she first brought this up, I thought that's kooky, but it's L.O.B. I want to explore this space. Dive in. Dive in. But now that you mention it, if there was somebody named Katrina, I'd be like, oh, like the freaking disastrous hurricane. Especially what if she lived in New Orleans? Oh, wow. It's like when I met a guy named Hitler, it was the same thing. It was so weird. I was like, hey, this is Stephen Hitler. This is Mike. Mike, meet Stephen Hitler. And I'm like.
Gosh, darn it, I can't escape the fact that your last name is Hitler. I changed her name. Lauren O'Brien, please meet my friend, George Stalin. Oh, Stalin. You don't want to change that to, like, Stalin? Well, his name is actually Stalin. So, anyway, George, this is Lauren. Hello, George. It would be weird. It would be. Even when I hear names that are normal, but they're somebodies, I go, oh, yeah. You're not going to meet a guy named John Earnhardt and think of anything else. But Dale Earnhardt. But Dale Earnhardt. Hey, Steve, this is Michael Earnhardt. Hello, Michael. This is Steve. First dip-esque question yet. Any relation to the...
No, actually, I'm not. I'm sure you've never heard that before either, so I'm sorry I said something. That's okay. I get it all the time. I'm not related to Dale Earnhardt or Dale Earnhardt Jr. My friend Melissa Jobs. Yes. It's pronounced Jobes, so she prefers to go by Jobes. It's different with a person than a storm. I would think it with a person. Never would have ever crossed my mind to go, oh, wow, Irene. She knew. You're vicious. Like, I met her and there was definitely like a... Yeah, I know. Sorry about... Sorry. Crap. Sorry about Vermont. My parents live in New Jersey. Way to go, Irene. M1 Katrina from San Diego. Oh. Constructive little baby. No, you're unbelievable. That's all I ever hear. How could you? It's got to be weird, right? It's not weird, it's just, it kind of stinks, to be honest. Yeah, what do people say? Do they say, look what you did? I just get, you know, how, oh, you caused so much destruction, and, you know. You're like, yeah. Basically everything you guys were saying. It's pretty irritating, but it's the only way, you know, when I give my name over the phone to spell it. Oh, how do you spell? Yeah, like the hurricane. Yeah. Are you married? Yeah. Oh, good. Is your husband's name Hugo or Andrew or any other hurricane?
It's a good thing. I was going to say, it would make me dating tough. She goes, yeah, my name is actually Katrina Dahmer. It's very different. So there's that. Double-edged sword. Remember when you guys were talking about Hitler? That was my maiden name. My husband's name is Jeff with a G. And it's Jeff. It's just Jeff. And his last name is Dahmer. But it's Jeff with a G. Oh, Jeff Dahmer. Jeff Dahmer. Oh, hey, Geoff Dahmer. Geoff. Hey, Geoff. Hey, you guys, have you met Geoff Dahmer? It's actually just Geoff. I don't know why my parents are idiots and pronounce it Geoff, or spelled it Geoff, but it's just Geoff. He's new in sales, Geoff Dahmer. Hey, no freaking joke. His wife's name is Katrina. Like the freaking hurricane. I'm going to quit. and blow. Well, you're a hurricane. You might as well, right? Yeah. Fair enough. Well, I think maybe Irene is going to take over or maybe there'll be something more destructive hopefully for you. Right. I hope so. Hopefully just for you. Yeah. Hey, it could be worse. Your name could be Casey Anthony. Fair enough. And there is. You've got to figure that's a very popular last name. There's got to be a lot of Casey's. Yep. Thank you for the call. George Anthony. Imagine being George Anthony. Casey Anthony. Yeah. Hey, this is Casey. This is John.
You know, her last name is Ant... Don't... Oh, boy. Are you going to change your name? No, I'm not. Really? And I was hoping he wouldn't say that, but... Wow, gutsy. You're not going to kill your kid, are you? No, I'm not going to. I'm not. My name's Casey Anthony. I'm a guy. Doesn't mean you can't kill your kid. I know, but I'm a guy and it's Casey. I don't even spell it the same way. It's just my name's... K period, C period. Like in the Sunshine Band. Right. It's Casey. Why don't you just go whatever K is? Hey, let me guess. You make, is your middle name Masterpiece? And you make barbecue sauce. Is that it? Hey, KC. Hey, have you guys got KC? He's a freaking Masterpiece, this guy. KC Anthony. KC? Dude, that would be brilliant. A new character on a TV show is KC Anthony. It's actually, it's, never mind. It's just K. It's a K with a. Just go by the K. Why are you going by KC? Because I've always been KC. Well, my parents actually, my name is KC. There's no, it's not short for anything. It's simply. And then ever since the, forget it. There are people like that. Their names are J period, R period. What does it stand for? It's J-R. My name is J-R. Yeah. So weird. My brother's middle name is B. The letter.
Like Susan B. Anthony. Yes. It's 100% correct. Now, in her case, I bet that B actually stood for something. And I didn't just call her a B and say she stood for something. That was Jay's prom date. I bet that B stood for something, unlike nowadays. Isolate. This is the oven told you the Soulja Boy thing. Weird. So I'll tell you that. We'll do some Woods of Wisdom. We'll do some Name That Tune. Got a lot of show left for you. Don't go anywhere. Oh, and Martin Sheen not knowing what a DVR is. Screw loose to go in for that sort of thing. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I got the world on a tail. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes. On FM 94.9. With more discounts than ever before, Progressive can save you a lot of money on your car insurance. Savings. Oh, you can get bigger savings than that. Savings.
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Switchfoot. Chronic Tacos now has two locations, one in Encinitas and one in Solana Beach. They offer fast, fresh Mexican food from third generation recipes. Grab breakfast all day or maybe some fish, shrimp, fajitas, or fries. You can customize your entree any way you like it with the fresh ingredients. Check out eatchronictacos.com. This report brought to you by Burger King. At Burger King, try a delicious croissant, which paired with Seattle's best coffee. Enjoy a flaky croissant, perfectly cooked eggs, American cheese, and your choice of sausage, bacon, or ham at participating restaurants. Still some problems due to wet roads this morning on the 8 eastbound after Sunset Cliffs Boulevard injury accident. Pickup truck rolled twice into a ditch, an ambulance on the way for injuries. The 8 eastbound ramped to the 163, an accident that's got the left lane blocked, and the 67 out there on 9. northbound side at Bradley Avenue, an injury accident, two-car crash, an ambulance on the way there as well. This report brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers, Toyota owners. Your neighborhood Toyota dealer has a $25 mail-in rebate for any True Start or True 2 battery installed. Why wait? Visit the experts today. See participating Toyota dealers. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9.
The Mikey Show. With Mikey. I wear like a 44 small. Woods. I'm so lonely. Lauren. I'm very clumsy. And Jay. I'm wearing Dockers right now. On FM 94.9. I mentioned it earlier, but the drummer from My Chemical Romance, a guy named Michael Petticone, and on their website, the band's website, they say that he was caught red-handed. And their relationship with him is now over. They go on to say that he has confessed to police of stealing. But they didn't say what he stole. They say that they're heartbroken, sick to their stomachs, but they don't intend to press charges. Now, this guy goes on Twitter, the drummer for My Chemical Romance, and he says he made an error in judgment, says the situation is more complicated than it sounds.
And that the incident does not define him. He says that he never meant to hurt the band or their fans. So he stole something, we don't know what. And again, that's the drummer for the band My Chemical Romance. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, so the NFL regular season will start on Thursday. But guess what is already almost sold out? The ad space for the 2012 Super Bowl. There are five 30-second spots remaining. They are selling at a record $3.5 million a spot. Wow. And it's almost sold out. It will be sold out probably by the end of the week. Probably by the end of the week. So much for the bad economy. I know. Seriously. Also, I'm sure the San Diego Padres are ready to get this year in the books and get past... It's been a terrible year. They're 61-80. They lost yesterday to the Giants, and they will take on the Giants again today. It's Eric Surkamp against Wade LeBlanc. There you go. 705. Rapper Soldier. F all the Army troops. It's this new song called Let's Be Real. It has the military very upset, obviously. Wow. I don't get it. Like, I just don't get it. Like, what's the point of that? Why to say that? Yeah, I mean.
Like, who doesn't like troops? Who is in support of troops? Isn't he, in fact, a soldier? He's a soldier. Boy. He's a soldier boy. Shouldn't he? It's in the name. I mean. Hello? You're a soldier boy. But you're a soldier. Not? You're just boy now? Yeah. Man, the black folks love me. I love black folks. Well, that's fine. Not all I'm saying to you. I'd be loving me some black women. It's in the name. I get hit on by black girls all the time. She's just making me want it. So speaking of bands, Billy Joe Armstrong is the lead singer of Green Day. He was trying to get on a flight on Southwest Airlines from Oakland to Burbank. And he tweeted this. Just got kicked off a Southwest Airline flight because my pants sagged too low. What the F? No joke. Now, there was an ABC news producer on the same flight that said the flight attendant walks up to him. They're getting ready to take off. She says, you got to put your pants up higher. And Billy Joe Armstrong says back to her, quote, don't you have better things to do than worry about that? And she doesn't give up. And they stop the plane and they kick him off the flight. And he has to take the next flight to Burbank. And this happened, by the way.
on a completely different airline, U.S. Airways. Happened to a kid, goes to the University of New Mexico and plays for their football team. Same bit. He had his pants low, and they told him, pull your pants up, and he didn't want to. It seems weird to me, like, because that's a fashion thing. I mean, as long as your butt isn't showing, it's not like you're exposing yourself. I think the opportunity is there, maybe, to expose yourself. But if your boxer shorts are showing, then you're not exposing yourself. Right, but your wiener could come through the hole, as has happened to me, when going to get the mail one time. And your pants were on low? I just had boxers on, but, you know. So, in other words, a completely different situation than this? No, my boxers were exposed. But if you have your pants down and your boxers exposed, your wiener could come out. If your pants are around your ankles. Well, first of all, Billy Joel Armstrong is, what, 50? Maybe pull your pants up. Yeah. Billy Joe. If they tell you to pull your pants up, you know you do? You pull your pants up. Yeah, you pull your pants up, Billy Joe. You're 50 years old. You probably got four kids. I agree. I agree with you. I agree. Do you? I do. Pull up your pants. Pull your pants up. They got rules on planes. You don't F around on planes. You think I had a joint or a gun in my coat, but it was my baggy pants that kept me from going home.
They made a request and I guess I did not comply. What then resulted was they would not let me fly. My pants were unacceptable and so I missed my flight. I guess the next time my pants will be tight. Unacceptable and so I missed my flight. So I guess the next time my pants will be tight. My pants were unacceptable. So I miss my flight. So I guess that next time my pants will be tight. Have you seen my wiener? You have better things to do. Shouldn't he be wearing skinny jeans anyway? Is he a hipster? Yeah, I would have just pulled my pants up. First of all, your pants wouldn't have been down because you're a grown man. You're a father of three. You're 41 years old. Once you start acting like it on a plane. When your name's Billy Joe, it's probably hard to grow up. Fair enough. You know.
I'm just the type to comply. They say, hey, pull your pants up. I don't go. Do you have better things to worry about? Even me, who's kind of a D on a plane, when they tell me to jump, I ask them how high. I'm really very good on planes and in airport security. Just not turn your phone off. I do turn my phone off now. Now that I know it can interfere, I turn it off. Religiously. But you did not. Before. No, I didn't. Even though they told you to. Yeah, but I don't want to listen to them all the time. I thought you were, when it came to planes, you were, you'd do what they said. I do now. Now. Now. But I, first of all, the whole bit is, pull your pants up, Billy Joe. Yeah, it's not about why this, it's about what now. Exactly, Mike. Mike. Yeah, well, what happened? What made you change your philosophy to what now? You guys shamed me into it. Oh, okay. And a pilot called, I think, and said that it can actually interfere. And I was like, oh boy, I don't want to crash. So, turn my phone off. There you go. I thought it was a bit. It's not a bit, apparently. It is not. Just making things up all willy-nilly. Listen to Martin Sheen not knowing what a DVR is. Maybe set the DVR for both. Is there a DVR on this bus? What is a DVR? He was with his son, Charlie, and they were asked about the DVR. Maybe set the DVR for both. Is there a DVR on this bus? What is a DVR? It's a DVR. Hello. It's a digital video recorder.
What is that? Winning. What is that? Winning. Kind of like a TiVo. You ever heard of TiVo, Pop? No. That's how you record a show. That's it with a VCR. No, not a VCR. Kind of like a VCR, but new. New. You press a button. New VCR. Like a digital VCR. You're a moron, okay? Winning. Digital. What is that? I don't know. Let's ask Uncle Jay. Guy didn't know what a DVR is. Aw, it's so sad. Is it sweet and sad? It's sweet. I don't think it is. He should know what a DVR is. He's being precocious. He's being an old man precocious. Old man precocious. He has people do it for him. He's like, I want to watch my program. It's that thing that Alejandra comes into the room and presses play on when you want to watch television. The boxy box. Why does everybody call it a clicker? It's a remote. It's true. Why do we call it a clicker? Bring me the clicker. Where's the clicker? Do you have the clicker? I don't have the clicker. I have the remote. Oh, you don't call it a clicker? I don't. Yeah, we do. We call it a remote. We call it an icebox. The refrigerator. You still call it that, Jay? We still call it an icebox. On an unrelated note. Wow. Just things that, you know, it's kind of related. He also calls his toilet a commode. I call it a blinker in the car, not an indicator or a blinker. You really say icebox? I say icebox.
Holy cow. I call my wiener Henry. Is that pertinent to the conversation? They're just bringing a fact. You're sitting sausage. Related? It's just a topic that I had. It's just facts. Yeah. We just do facts. I like jelly. Just for instance. Jasper likes toast. We have a good Saturday. All right, let's play Name That Tune. You're going to like this one. Oh, you got a buzzer. Yeah, give me a buzzer. Everybody turn on your buzzer. Hold on. Where's mine? There we go. Now. What's the prize, Jay? Today's prize is a pair of passes to see Conan the Barbarian in 3D at any San Diego area Ultra Star Theater. Got it. That was a lot of work. And if you waited long enough. You're going to call, you're going to pick me, L-O-B, or Woods. The way that we do this is we use our name as a buzzer. Oh, there you go.
Now, we actually have buzzers, but you don't need to know about that. They're simply there as a backup. Sure. Okay, can we do a test run here real quick? I just want to see the buzzers work. There we go. Resetting. We all seem to have it. All right, let's do this. Wait a minute. Let's do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the prize once again? Today's prize is a pair of passes to see Conan the Barbarian in 3D at any San Diego area Ultra Star Cinema. M1. Sponger from Escondido. Who do you want? We'll take Woodsy, please. Hang on the line. M1. Jason from Lakeside. Who do you want? I'll take you, Mikey. You got it. Hang on. Also a good choice. And M1. Sticky Fingers from San Diego. You there? Yes. Who do you want? Who's left? Woodsy is. Or what? LLB. LLB is left. LLB is left. Hang on. All right. What's the theme? Theme is creepy songs, and I sing them. Oh, perfect. Wait, wait, wait. Creepy songs? Creepy songs. And you're singing them? And I'm singing them. Acapella. Awesome. Acapella. I figured no one knew creepy better than me. All right. Here we go. Every move you make. Woods, Woods, Woods, Woods. Oh, it's green for me. Say your name. You got to say your name. I did. Please, every breath you take. Hey!
The buzzer doesn't lie. Here we go. There's a lady. Wood. Wood. Stairway to heaven. We will listen to these all the way through at some point. Yes. FYI. Here we go. Tiptoe from the garden. By the garden. Tiptoe through the tulips. Tiny Tim. That is such a creepy song. The creepiest. He's the worst. Here we go. Hide my head, I want to drown my sorrow. Oh, I know. No to my... Lauren. Mad World. Lauren. Nice. Great. I recognize it, but I couldn't tell you who it was. Donnie Darko? Gary Jewell. Here we go. Well, yeah. Poo-poo-be-doo. Wait, wait, wait. Reset. Here we go. King Cloud. Here we go. You ready? Poo-poo-be-doo. Mikey. I want to be... Go ahead, Mikey. I want to be loved by you.
Very creepy song. Wait. Play it, Jay. I got to hear you sing it. I want to be kissed by you. You and nobody else but you. Oh, my gosh. I want to be kissed by you. Alone. Poop, poop, poop, poop. Oh, my God. To anything higher. Oh, wow. Oh, it's creepy. All right, here we go. Sometimes I feel I've got to... Woods, woods, woods. Lauren, um... She did love.
Congratulations, Lauren. Thank you. Fair and square. You got to say it a little faster, Lauren. Here we go. You didn't give me a countdown. Reset. Reset. Q. Women seem wicked. Woods. Woods. Woods. People are strange. You ever just beat the hell out of the equipment? Don't you have to. Here we go. Hold on. Oh, boy. Hold on. There we go. When you came in. Woods. Wait, wait, wait. The air went out. I have no idea. Oh, my God. It buzzed in on accident. Woods has an issue with buzzers. Yeah, it's very sensitive. Let's switch. No, no, I try to hover. We'll switch. This one's not as sensitive. Okay, good. I want to do bad things to you. Isolate that. Who is that? What? Isolate. It's Jace Everett. It's a True Blood theme song. Oh, yeah. It is Jace Everett. It is the Jace Everett song. From the True Blood. Don't be sad that you lost. Yeah, Lauren knew it.
Weird. Reset it. Here we go. And it's been a ruin of many, poor boy. Oh, wow. And God. Oh. I know. Ew. I'm one. Ew. What was that? Oh. Oh, wait. How did you possibly know? Mikey. Yeah. Johnny Cash. Yeah. And it's been. Oh, I know it. I know. I know it. Dang it. Dang it. Dang it. Oh, I do, too. I know it. Buzz in. I don't know what it's called. I won. I know it now. Get all of you. This isn't reset anyway, so even if we wanted to buzz in. Animals, House of the Rising Sun. Oh, got it. Here we go. Well, I'm not the world's most physical guy. Woods, the kinks. Lola. Yeah. Here we go. We got two left. What's the score? It's Mike one, Woods three, LB four. Oh, boy. So I got a couple of two-pointers here coming up.
Here we go. I'm a widow. Lauren. Creep. Damn it. It's in the name. Yeah. Here we go. Hey, little girl. What? Bruce Springsteen. There you go. Oops. What's the score? What's the score? What's the score? It's five to six to one. I win. Dang it! We have one more, I thought. Oh, that was it. Congrats. Gosh darn it! And one sticky fingers. Cuffing sucks. Thank you, L-O-B. L.O.B. won for you. Yes, I did. Nicely done. I hate that. You hate it because it's fair. Accurate. Talk to me. I hate it. Talk to me. It screwed me on one. I know. It screwed me on another one because it was too sensitive and I had to buzz in. Right. It's the thing's fault. We got buzzers. Hate it. Okay. Hate them. The reason for the buzzers was to eliminate...
People saying, and by people, I mean it could be any of us, right? No. Arguing and saying, I said my name and then you called on Lauren. That's not fair. So I spent $325 on professional game show buzzers. These are the real deal, you guys. Jeopardy's aren't as good as ours. No. And Woods will hit the buzzer before we begin. On accident. On accident. Because they're too sensitive. They're sensitive. Which will stop everything. Jay's got to reset them. Or, I told him, I said, hit the buzzer when you say your name. He'll get the two mixed up and he'll go, Woods! Oh, I mean, and then he'll slam the thing. He's slamming it. And by that time, one of us has figured out the song. We've hit the buzzer. Right. What are you going to do?
And we just... Now, I don't think we can use these. What? That's the only fair way. It's not because Woods hits the buzzer too soon. Maybe everybody else doesn't suffer and Woods learns how to use the buzzer. I say if he does it from now on, we can disqualify him. He loses that round. But then he'll say... that it was rigged. When Lauren wins, he already feels he gets hosed. I get hosed anyway. I'll be up nine to one. These are the nine-pointer. In a real show, if you hit the button, they're like, hey, give us an answer. Hey, in a real show, they don't change the value of the points as you go along. He changed it this time. It went against me. Right. He always does. You know, I think I might have a new rule. Maybe we just don't say our names and we hit the buzzer because it does beep. I'm in on that. You can hear it. And then Jay says whose buzzer went off. Yes, I'm in on that. I wish you had more that we could do right now. Yeah, those are good. Because basically the 325 was spent to get Woods to stop complaining about Jay's.
Calling. Good luck on that. That ain't going to happen. That ain't going to happen. Even with an electronic buzzer. No, no, with a buzzer. As long as I don't have to say my name, I'm good. As long as you don't have to say your name, you're good. So we'll just. You don't have any more, do you, Jay? No, get them all. All right, next time. You'll get them, kid. We'll get it worked out. Gosh, it makes me laugh. Let's see. We got time? We do have time. Mikey, my friend's a diehard sports fan. Every time one of his teams wins, he makes sure that he posts their victory on Facebook. He's made sure to call us all aware since age 10. Excuse me. He's made sure to make us all aware since age 10. Me being me, I make sure to Facebook him every time one of his teams lose. While he finally had enough and befriended me.
On Facebook. Defriended. Unfriended. Yeah. We're both 33-year-old males. Is this the way that he should act? Should a guy ever unfriend another guy on his Facebook? Well, no. Not over a sports team, in my opinion. However, you know who doesn't get unfriended? Guy that doesn't run a lip. Right. But he said, listen, it's in the email. He says, me being me. Well, that's the ticket, kid. You get to be you. Fine, be you. He don't like it. Your friend doesn't like it. Now, he's probably told you, I don't like it. Now, at the same time, it's the same bit with Woodsy and his Yankees, right? You go through the same thing. Yeah, but if I want to... You don't unfriend anybody. Oh, gosh, you do? You unfriend people? You unfriend people that are Red Sox?
I might have, well, this actually was a guy that I went to high school with that I hadn't talked to in years. So the Rangers and the Yankees were in the playoffs last year. Oh, wow. And this MF-er was running so much lip, I just blocked him. I said, I'm done with you. You've never won anything ever, and you're an idiot. And you probably just started watching baseball this year because the Rangers are doing good. So I blocked him. I didn't know the guy all that well. I wouldn't do it to a buddy. My OBF is over here. My only black friend, Eric Turman, Peanut. And he and I will go round and round on Facebook about the Yanks Red Sox. So, but I would never unfriend him. That's true. You know, you can block one person from being able to, they can still be your friend, but you can prevent them from doing anything on your wall. I'll show you how. I just, when the playoffs started, I just turn off all comments. I just disable all, which is great. I have a theory on why they love to do it with you. Because they know it bothers me. Because they know it bothers you. Yeah, they know it makes me nuts. Yeah. It makes me beat my head against the wall. And I know it's all in good fun. But you still take them off of there? I haven't done anybody since that guy. Stop. He's a douche, though. Guy also cost me a no-hitter, by the way, when we were in sophomore baseball. So, please, Martin Moberly. Maybe make a play.
Name, name? Yeah. Maybe you make a play, dude. Had a no-hitter. Is it lame to unfriend someone? Nah. Depends on how close you are to the guy. If it's some douche running lip, unfriend him. That you don't know. Like Martin Moverley. Can't catch a pop fly. Right over his head. Hey, we got a live studio audience in here. We'll be right back. People are going to like this. The Mikey Show. It's a good time. You know what I mean? Call 570-1949 or text 949mikey at gmail.com. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. The GoPhone is great and it's unlimited. It's the GoPhone Unlimited. Unlimited talk, text, and web for 50 bucks a month. It's the nationwide network. So you can trust it. It's from AT&T. There's no annual contract. You don't have to do a credit check with it. It's really, really outstanding.
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Instant storefront. Take a step forward and chase what matters. Merchant services agreement with Chase Payment Tech and Chase business checking account required and subject to approval. Restrictions apply. Offer expires September 30, 2011 and applies to kiosk package only. See chase.com slash storefront for complete details. JPMorgan Chase Bank and a member of DIC. What if you could lose 30 pounds by doing one thing once a day? Once a day? Just one time? I would definitely try it. If you're trying to lose over 30 pounds but don't want the counting and complication of diets, you can be among the first to receive an amazing proven breakthrough in weight loss. A once-daily capsule that can help you lose weight in days. For a 30-day risk-free trial, call 1-800-226-1548. Acai Fresh is one of the healthiest ways to lose weight. Each capsule contains natural ingredients to boost your metabolic heart rate, allowing you to shed pounds with just one capsule a day. Be among the first to call for your risk-free trial and get yours right now. Once a day, I can do that. If you would like to lose 30 pounds or more by taking just one all-natural capsule a day, call for the risk-free trial, 1-800-226-1548. That number again is 1-800-226-1548.
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After years of being humiliated on the playground and having your bad hair and thick glasses ridiculed and mixing plaids with stripes, who's the nerd now, huh? HelpWantedSanDiego.com invites all IT professionals to post their resumes with us. Local employers are currently seeking to fill IT, sales, programming, and medical jobs. So, ninu, ninu, ninu, Mr. Popular. Help one at sandiego.com. Long name, amazing results. The Padres' schedule is winding down, but the baseball season continues with exciting playoff action. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show is your source for expanded pennant race coverage and the best chargers reporting anywhere in San Diego. And, of course, we've set up camp at Montezuma Mesa for exciting Aztecs action all season long. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show, weeknights at 10 beginning in October on Channel 4, San Diego. Baseball action continues exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego as the Padres continue their series with San Francisco, 6.30 Tuesday. From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse, go behind the headlines and sports pages and get to know the real people who don the Padres uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego. There's a rumor that San Diego is home to one of the most brilliant, insightful, and educational culinary TV shows ever created. And then, there's my show.
But it's big in taste and small in effort. Sam the Cooking Guy, Sundays at 5.30 and 7 p.m., only on Channel 4 San Diego. Mom, I want to be a pilot. Is it tough? It's not easy. You could do it. Study hard, go to a good school, never skip your math homework. Huh, piece of cake. Oh, yeah? But can you finish those carrots for your pilot's vision? Eh, I'd rather do my math homework. Thought so. There's a moment when an activity becomes an accomplishment, and when that moment comes for your child, you want to be ready. The ScholarShare Plan, California's official 529 plan, can help your kids reach their potential. It's a careful, consistently maintained college savings program, and your earnings are federal and California state income tax-free when used for qualified higher education expenses. For more information, visit ScholarShare.com or call 800-544-5248. To learn more about the ScholarShare College Savings Plan and its investment objectives, risks, charges, and expenses, please contact Fidelity for a fact kit. Read it carefully. The ScholarShare College Savings Plan is offered by the ScholarShare Investments. And now back to the Mikey Show. Rise and shine. With Mikey. When you're fat, you're always feeling a cold breeze. Woods. The best movie ever made. Footloose. Lauren. I'm all hot and bothered.
I am. And Jake. Look, I like to climb and I like to eat edamame, okay? On FM 94.9. Hey, let's make some noise in our live studio audience. It's called Mike and Show Live. And we love to do it. We do it every single day. On Fridays, we do two hours. On Monday through Friday, we do 9 to 10. If you're trying to listen to us online, we're fixing it. I think it's fixed. Maybe it's fixed. I've read that it's fixed. If it's not. There's always the radio. We're trying. We're working hard for you. We're not. Somebody is. Somebody's doing it. Yeah, I don't have anything to do with that. A lot of people get it. Mikey, I don't know. L.O.B. does the podcast. Is it her fault? Yeah. Try her. Try her. Please don't. It's got to be L.O.B. She does podcasts. Mypictureboot.com, thank you for bringing in that picture booth that people get to enjoy when they come and hang out in the studio. It's really awesome. You can get one for your place, too.
Nothing topless yet, which I'm surprised. Not yet. Not yet. I think people are trying to keep it on the easy side. Well, they don't have to. I'm just saying. No. Yeah. Step it up. I haven't had a text printed out in the last month, but we just got one. It's from M1 Lush. It says, best bit ever. We need an album of all Creepy J's creepy songs. Now, again, haven't received a text in a month. No. It's weird. And she's really pretty. Yes. Weird. And of all texts. Didn't know that. Yeah. Jay decides to print the pretty girl that's saying something about him. Doug needs a text every day. Every day. Well, they're usually not up to the standards. They don't allow me to self-gloss myself. They're not up to standards. Now, listen. What does Woods mean? Jay's recap reads the following. My weekend in a nutshell.
I can't wait. I can't wait. Surfed in waves that were too unruly to ride. Sounds like I'm reading the script of a Dos Equis commercial. Jacques Cousteau's biography, maybe. Yes. He surfs in waves that are too unruly to ride. He is the most interesting, Jay, in the world. Thank you. Thank you. My weekend in a nutshell. Surfed in waves, too unruly to ride. Buried. Padres game with the crew. Boring. Woods dumped his cup of spit all over my wife. On purpose, clearly. Went out on a sailboat to go surf an open water break. Returned by sailboat to Oceanside Harbor and are told that, I repeat, and are told that six boats capsize trying to enter.
Harbor Patrol tried to talk us out of entering. Bet it didn't stop you, Jay. Where would we go? Where would we go? Where would we go? Chris Columbus over there. Nina. Just refuses. Santa Jay. Just refuses to give up. It was frightening. Santa Jay. We wanted to chance it, so they said that they would have a patrol boat and two jet skis to rescue us. Guys in full helmets. You have kids, dude. You're married with children. What choice did I have? Watch a movie. He calls me careless. He's so careless. You're responsible, Jay. We ruled it. We made it no problem. Then finish the weekend by skating with Jasper and hanging out with some old friends. By old friends, I mean Eddie, Ashley, Costa. Costas. Costas. They wish you well, do they? I vote... I vote that all weekend should be three days. All weekend? All weekends. We forgot the is. Well, nobody's perfect. Yesterday I saw the movie Apollo 18. It wasn't bad. I think you're going to have to wait to tell us about it, though, because I think we have to go to break. Yep.
Almost. You have six seconds. I have 40 seconds left. So, go. Go. Like the micro machine. Follow 18. Yay or nay? Oh, gosh. Yay. Midway. I got almost up, you know, almost down. Sideways, though. I'd have done it different. Oh, boy. How's the theater? Midway. Theater's good. I went to that theater in Del Mar that has the leather seats in it. Fancy. Fancy place. Really nice, though. You get to order food? How was the food? It's good. How much did you order? A lot. I knew you'd be the person that asked. Food eater, fatty. Food, food, fooderson. McFood. Fatty McFat. Give me food. How's the food, Mike?
I want tacos. Hey, dude, banging out in a chaff. Stick your big old cow head in there and just eat. He's sloppy like a pig now. Yeah. You swallow. You swallow in it. There's a guy in Britain on TV who was fired for incompetence, meaning he stumbled when he talked. They fired him finally. And we have a clip. And we'll play it for you when we get back. Or text them, 949mikey at gmail.com. More coming up, 94.9. We may not be able to lower the cost of gas, but we can do something about how many miles you will drive per gallon. Stop by your local O'Reilly Auto Parts store today and let us help you increase the performance of your car or truck. Simple things like replacing your air filter, changing worn-out spark plugs, and using fuel injector cleaner can add up to better fuel economy and big savings.
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This is Jack, founder of Jack in the Box. Let's talk to Ronnie on line one. Jay Box, I'm about to drop some knowledge on your listeners. Drop away. All right, check this out. I drop a monster truck limo. Want to know why? Because that's your job? Nah, bro, because I go big or I go home. Boom, that's how I roll. Okay. Yeah, I got a 99-inch flat screen mounted on top of my shock aquarium. Know why? Because I go big or I go home. Yeah, well, I've got the perfect thing for you. My new jumbo breakfast platter. It's huge. Scrambled eggs, hash browns, eight mini pancakes, and your choice of bacon or sausage, all for just $2.99 plus tax. Aw, yeah. I'm going to get ten of those breakfast platters. Know why? Because Ronnie doesn't want to go home? True that. Because Ronnie lives with his parents? Yeah. Try Jack's new jumbo breakfast platter. It's scrambled eggs, hash browns, mini pancakes, plus bacon or sausage, all for just $2.99 plus tax. Price and participation may vary. If a car drove by recently that made you point and say, how cool, what is that? Chances are you spotted the all-new Ford Fiesta, quite possibly the perfect car for San Diego. Yeah, it's a pretty big deal. Sure, Fiesta's a compact car, but you don't have to compromise a thing. You'll get up to 40 miles per gallon on the highway. Hey, there are 21 hybrids that don't get that kind of MPG. Seriously, the interior looks like the cockpit of a Learjet, and it's quiet.
Spooky quiet. If you dig technology, you'll dig this car. Fiesta's available with hands-free sync. Say a command, and it'll dial your phone or play your favorite tunes. You're going to want to show this car off to your friends. And feel free to brag about what you paid. Fiesta starts at just $13,320. So stop pointing, wondering, and wishing. What is that? Just come into any San Diego County Ford dealer and drive one. Learn more at sandiegocountyford.com. EPA estimated 29 MPG city, 40 highway, 33 combined. Hybrid claim based on automatic SFE versus 2010 and 2011 hybrids. MSRP excludes tax, title, destination, and registration fees. Optional equipment not included. See dealer for details. Hi there, this is L.O.B. here to talk to you about Ovation Cell Therapy. Recently, one of my male friends, who will not be named, was telling me how great Ovation is working for him. L.O.B., this is great. I don't know what's going on. My hair's soft. I know. And don't forget that it's stronger. Yeah, yeah. And it's... I know Woods. I mean, person that will go unnamed. It's the advanced formula from Ovation, which is an even better product than the original cell therapy system from Ovation. Ovation worked for me. It worked for my unnamed friend who...
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Merchant services agreement with Chase Payment Tech and Chase business checking account required and subject to approval. Restrictions apply. Offer expires September 30th, 2011 and applies to kiosk package only. See chase.com slash storefront for complete details. JPMorgan Chase Bank and a member of TIC. Go to a Burger King and try a delicious croissandwich paired with a Seattle's best coffee. Enjoy a flaky croissant with scrambled eggs and melted American cheese with your choice of sausage, bacon, or ham at participating restaurants. And now back to the Mikey Show. No! With Mikey. What does it do, Jay? It makes it 3D. I wanted one of those avatars to be like... And like beat my face and go. Woods. If 16-year-old girls are in on something, I'm out on it. Lauren. I'm very aggressive when it comes to lines. And Jay. If you want any, you'll be nice to me. Yes, ma'am. On FM 94.9. So this guy is from Britain. And he's a TV personality named Ortis Delsey. And he's recently been fired because he's not very good. And here's what he sounds like. Now to two men who will probably have multiple visions by the time these championships end. It's our commentators, Rob Rawling and John Rawling and Rob Walker. Sorry, fellas. Don't worry about that. Okay. Time now for another break. And when we come back, we'll, of course, have more coverage live for you from here. And plus, we'll be taking a look at this morning's first session here in Dago. We'll see you soon.
Commentators are Rob Walling, Rob Rawling, and I keep getting his names wrong. I do apologize. Rob Walker and John Walling. And we talk to the hottest athlete of the moment, the Honorable Leo Usain Bolt. It's Leo, St. Leo Usain Bolt. We'll be talking to him after the break. Well, that was a good performance. So, we have a gloriously sunny day here in the studio. We've seen some action this morning as well. Identical J. Yeah, British J. Good night. It's your British twin, Isabel. Well, he didn't last. They had a letter. No, that was French. That was French. That's French. Oui, oui. Maggie show. Maggie show. It's not even the same country. That's his British accent. It's British. Oui, oui, oui. Well, he didn't make it. They had to let him go. Thank God that we don't fall under those same standards over here. Now, what about this? Try to tell me why Fox had to apologize. Fox had to apologize for this reporter who wanted to make a big deal out of the fact that, well, the Pac-10 has now added two teams, Colorado and Utah. So this guy from Fox Sports decided he was going to go to USC and he was going to talk to some students and have them...
Talk about Utah and Colorado joining the Pac-10 and say, you know, welcome, whatever. But he seemed to target a certain type of person. Colorado and Utah joined the Pac-10 this year, so let's give the conference's two newest members a good old-fashioned All-American welcome by paying a visit to one of its oldest members. USC. Hi, excuse me, are you a USC student? You know the football team, right? USC, Trojans? Oh, yeah, yeah. We're talking to students about Colorado and Utah joining the Pac-10. Old news, right? So would you perhaps look in the camera, tell Colorado and Utah what they have to look forward to as new members of the Pac-12? I have no idea what it is. Actually, I don't know anything about the football, but I guess it will be an exciting semester for them. So just go ahead and look in the camera. So, what should I say? Welcome? Welcome? Yeah, welcome, well, at Colorado. I talk about what? No, no, no, no, no, Utah. Welcome to Colorado and Utah. No, welcome, because you're saying to Colorado, but we're in Los Angeles. So say, welcome, Colorado and Utah to the Pac-12. To the Pac-12. Hello, welcome, Colorado and Utah.
Here we're going to beat you, and the UFC is going to win. Thank you. Yeah, it was kind of aggressive. So dude goes, I have an idea. That guy is a jerk. This is brilliant. How dare you? That guy is a jerk. How dare you? You were laughing. Well, she wasn't laughing. To LLB's defense, she turned her back and tried with all her might not to laugh. Sniggling. Now, guy goes, I have an idea. Let's go to SC. Find some Asians that don't know anything about football and ask them what they think about the two new teams that are joining. So what's the problem? What's the problem? That is something you would do. If I was allowed, I'd be doing it this afternoon. Funny. Now, here's my take. I'm Mexican. When I say that I'm Mexican, a lot of you might be surprised that I'm Mexican. Because I don't talk like this. Don't you? But let's say that I did talk like this, okay? You might think that it may be unusual for me to know a lot of American customs. And I probably wouldn't. Just like if you took me right now and put me in the middle of Mexico. And they came to me and they were like, in Spanish. I thought that was just my headphone. There we go. There we go. So if I were to go to Mexico.
I talk like this, and a Mexican reporter came up to me and says, what do you think about the new bullfighting, blah, blah, blah, because they know I'm American. And I'm like, I don't know. I'm not really that offended by that, me personally. I'll raise my hand and say, I'm not offended. In fact, it's kind of funny. I will say as an American, because I don't get it. But what if you were attending a university in Spain? Yeah. and you were attempting to speak Spanish the best that you could, and a bunch of Spanish people were like, ha, ha, ha, laughing at you. They do. They do. But they don't do it maliciously, and they don't do it hatefully. No, it's not hateful. It isn't hateful. Now, to me, racism is hateful. I thought you were going to say racism is funny. No. I don't think racism is funny. Race jokes are funny, though. Race jokes are funny. I think race jokes are funny. In fact, I think we take ourselves too seriously. I made one over the break. Thank you. I think race jokes are okay. Now, with that being said, I've never experienced, except for once, real true racism. Right. And when I did experience it, it wasn't fun. It wasn't about fun. It was like serious. Now, in any case, that's not funny. Right. It's hateful.
But yeah, L.O.B., to use your example, if I go to Spain and I'm learning how to speak Spanish and I'm going to a Spanish university and a big bullfighting thing is in town and they come up to all the Americans and they go, what do you think about this? And I'm like, I don't know anything about bullfighting. And they run that on TV. I don't really care. It's not that big a deal. It's kind of funny. I get it. I'm the American. Ha ha ha. OK, I get it. Like, I know you don't hate me. I know you don't dislike me. I know that you're having a little fun. Now, if somebody comes up to me and says, you're American, right? Yeah, I am. We don't like Americans around here. And they kick my head in. That's not funny. That ain't funny. And if they start calling me hateful names that have to do with Americans that involve hate, don't like it. It isn't funny. Anybody calls me a spick. I probably and they and they're like and I know what that I've heard that word. My dad was a victim of that word for real. I get it. But that's not that's not what this is. Right. So you have to imagine that he's going to get some heat. You know why? You know why? Because we're PC. Because we're PC. Now, I was having to explain PC to my Hungarian nanny. I was having to explain it because she'd heard it.
Didn't know what it was. So I was having to explain it. And she didn't know. It was very difficult to explain. It's kind of difficult to explain a lot of things that we have that we just say and they don't know, like from another country. For us, we say, give them the cold shoulder. She's like, give them the cold shoulder. What is this? Why is shoulder cold? I don't understand. What would be, why would you not talk to someone if your shoulder is cold? I give you odd shoulder, Mike. I have my shoulder 98.6, just like yours. So, oh boy. So, but anyway, that is a very distinctly American thing. It's very distinctly American. In Italy, watch television in Italy. It doesn't look anything like what we see in America. It doesn't look anything like what we see in America. But, you know, it is what it is. Speaking of...
I didn't get to the 10 worst songs of the 90s, and I want to, so we've got to save it. Rolling Stone did their 10 worst songs of the 90s, and it's freaking hysterical.