The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 09/14/11
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
vicente fernandezword of the daypick your poisonmarshall falkcasey anthonyeel urethrathai prank callsnugs blankielasik surgerytime cardsgumby robberpadres tickets
The show featured a nostalgic deep‑dive into Mexican music as Mikey, Woodsy and Jay struggled to recall Vicente Fernandez’s name, followed by a lively Word‑of‑the‑day segment that offered Padres and Switchfoot prizes. Later, L.O.B.’s Pick Your Poison game pitted Lady Gaga against Octomom, while Marshall Falk called in to talk about his Hall of Fame induction and his foundations. The program also included bizarre stories—from a live eel spa accident to a Thai‑restaurant hip‑hop prank call—and personal reflections like Mikey’s Snugs blankie tale.
What happened, in order
Fernandez Name Confusion
The hosts try to recall the name of the legendary Mexican singer Vicente Fernandez while joking about his nickname 'Melvis'.
Word of the Day Prize
Mikey announces that the word of the day 'residence' wins listeners Padres tickets, a Switchfoot concert, and a chance at a VIP prize package.
Casey Anthony Warning Signs
The crew discusses Casey Anthony's possible involvement in her daughter's death, citing warning signs like a Facebook hot-body contest and postpartum speculation.
Eel in Urethra Spa Incident
A bizarre beauty‑treatment story is told where a man receives a live eel spa that wanders into his urethra, requiring surgery to remove a six‑inch eel.
Pick Your Poison: Gaga vs Octomom
L.O.B. presents Lady Gaga and Octomom as the 'lesser of two evils' for a committed relationship, sparking a heated debate about Octomom's notoriety.
Marshall Falk Hall of Fame Talk
Hall of Famer Marshall Falk joins the show to discuss his induction, his foundation work, and football memories with Kurt Warner.
Snugs Blankie Memories
Mikey shares childhood memories of his beloved blankie 'Snugs', describing its role in his life and the lengths he went to keep it.
Thai Restaurant Hip‑Hop Prank Call
Mikey and Woodsy execute a prank call to a Thai restaurant ordering food using only hip‑hop artist names, confusing the staff.
People mentioned
MikeyWoodsyL.O.B.JayDadVicente FernandezLauren ManningCasey AnthonyMarshall FalkJacob KissJason JaramaJoshNita
34,871 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
I love the Charlie Sheen drop. Me too. They are all good. And they're still good. You've been warned, dude. You've been warned. Wait, wait, wait. Say again? Deals and trolls. Shut up. Shut up. Stop. Stop. Move forward. Bye. We're not live, are we? Yeah, we actually are. Is there going to be a time? I offended you. I didn't know you were such a... I didn't know you were so sensitive. Is there going to be a time when those are like... I don't think so. I don't think so. I think the only one that will be is... Winning. Yeah, that's the only one. But aside from that, I think years from now, years from now, you could say. Stay away from the crack. Yeah. Scoreboard doesn't lie. Never has. And it will work. Welcome to the program. Let me tell you something. I am going to have a news story today that is so badass. And when I say badass, I mean it's creepy.
Like the creep factor in it, it's gonna get you. I'm telling you right now, L.O.B., did you read the headline? I saw the headline. If you're a guy, it's going to really make your skin crawl. If you're a girl, you're going to feel for this guy, but there may be a disconnect where you're like, I wonder what that's like. I don't have one of those body parts. So, we will tell you about it. It's crazy. I'm Mikey. That's Woodsy with the poncho. Poncho's a good idea. It's freezing in here, so. It is. It's chilly. I work with you, so I figure. You figure that I need it. Right. I mean, it puts you at ease to see a poncho in the morning, so that's why I have one. That if you didn't wear a poncho, I would somehow be like, that's not very nice. No, it's not. Wearing a jacket. It would spin you out. Yeah.
But seeing that, I'm like, just like home. Yeah, it's just like being at home. It's very slimming. It is slimming. My dad loves this guy. Fernando. And I mean, this dude is. big. In the world of Mexican music, he's like... Yeah, I was going to ask you, who's he like here? Think of the biggest artist, single artist, you know, not a band. The biggest artist? Aretha Franklin. He's... Okay, wait, wait, wait. He's the Elvis of Mexican. He's Melvis. Yes. And I can't remember his last name. You got the list of all the numbers, right, Jay?
No. Okay. I've never gotten your dad's phone number from you. Yeah, I've got to get you all. I've got to get him. Okay, I'm going to call my dad. Is he awake? Oh, yeah. My dad, trust me. My dad, he's always up. Loves this guy. I actually do, too. I'm embarrassed to admit it. I don't understand the words. Yet, I love it. I love that sound. It reminds me of barbecues and eating. Sounds like a party. Hey, Dad? Yeah? What's the name of that guy that you love, Fernando? Fernandez. Fernando Fernandez? Go figure. Is his name Fernando Fernandez? No, no. What is it? His first name is... Hold on. That's it.
That's what happens, by the way, when you've been married to somebody for 55 years. Hun, what's the name of the butter I like? Yeah. That's true. She didn't give me the name. I thought about it. I don't think that's right, Dad. I don't think it's Vicente. I'm looking on iTunes, and I know he's on there. And it ain't Vicente Fernandez. Try Vicente. Yeah, like Vincent. Try V-I-C-E-N-T-E. Oh, I know. You like him. Yeah. He's a big player in your world. Yes, he is. Have you ever seen him perform live? Just on TV. Yeah. He likes to drink a lot, but boy, can he belt them up. Your son used to. Hey, Dad, do you have a favorite song by him? Do I have a what? A favorite song by Vicente Fernandez. Oh, there's many, Mike. Okay. I'm just asking for one. Yeah, I can't think of one right now. Perfect.
Live on the radio. Really powerful. No problems with that. Let me ask you a question, Dad. If I read you some names, can you tell me, oh, that's a good one? I'll try. El remedido. El remedido. El remedido. How about un minuto de silencio? No. How about Camino de Cantu? Oh, boy. Yeah, that's good. Oh, you like that one? You actually like that one? I think he's just tired of hearing you trying to pronounce Spanish. Is that true, Dad? He's embarrassed. He's embarrassed. You're embarrassed and you just don't want to play along. You sound like you're speaking Japanese. All right, all right, all right. I got to know. All right, I'm going to fix it, Dad. Are you a Mexican?
Or a Mexicant. I'm a Mexicant. All right. Entre el amor y yo. No lo puedo creer. Oh. Is that that? Is that a good one? Yeah, that's a good one. No lo puedo. I think he's being serious. I think he really likes that one. Does he? Dad, have you ever heard of Vicente Fernandez and his song, No Lo Puedo Creer? Good one. That's a good one. He said, get off my phone, he's saying. All right, Dad, here it is. This is, here it is. No lo, no lo puedo creer. Órale, Simón. Let me tell you something. You definitely woke me up, Mike. That's your boy. That's genius. That is genius. I've never heard your dad laugh like that. Me neither. Let me tell you something, Dad. I am looking at this album cover and I am telling you I'm getting a pair of pants. Like Vincente.
Fernandez. And I'm going to get him a skin tight, just like Vincente. Extra, extra, extra large. How dare you. He's dying. They would have taught me one word of Spanish. I could have done this for a living. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my goodness. I love you, Pop. I love you too, Mike. All right. See you later. Oh, that's hilarious. Freaking brilliant. That was infectious laughter. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. You got it real good. He loves when I speak Spanish because he knows I can't and it makes him laugh. He laughs. I have never heard him laugh like that. Me neither. He loves it. That was the best. He loves it. Man, my face hurts. It's killing me. Word of the Day today is residence. And listen to this. This is unbelievable. This is the prize for Word of the Day today. First of all, you're going to get the Padres tickets for Sunday that includes the Switchfoot concert after the game. But what we're doing is all of the Word of the Day winners between now and Friday, the day of the show, all of the Word of the Day people, we're qualifying you on Friday.
We're going to pick one of you. You're going to get a VIP package, two tickets to the game, two on-field passes for the show. What? For the show. What? Two meet-and-greet passes for the show. Oh. Two autographed Switchfoot items and the new album. Can I call in? You cannot. Why? You cannot. But I'm a fan. Employee of the radio station. Yeah, you cannot be an employee of the radio station. So that will not work. Ladies and gentlemen, no lo puedo creer. Vincente Fernandez. Those horns are a big player. Gosh darn, they love those horns. You know what I really like is, and this will make you even more disgusted, I love the Mexican accordion. When they do the accordion, the whole bit, you know? Doesn't bother me. I'm not mad at it. I don't like it when I'm sitting at my table trying to eat, though. I'm like, no, no, please, move along. Hey, uh...
Can we get one more margarita for the lady and then also... No salt. No salt, please. She doesn't like salt on the glass. And we told them that last... I don't mean to be a jerk. I mean, I had it because it was fine. She drank it. Not to be a jerk, but last time we said no salt and it had salt. But also, can we get a refill on the chips and salsa? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Should we get a side of guacamole? No problem. Yeah, the problem is we asked that. 30 minutes ago. Signora, no comprendo. You do understand. Actually, I do. I speak English. Yeah, I know you do. I'm trying to do it. Josh. Yeah, I know you do. Josh. What do you want again? Well, I want chips and sauce and my wife would like it. Easy. You're okay. Looks like you haven't messed too many meals and you're hammered anyway. She's not. You have a manager? You're fine. I am the manager. Perfect. Well, we asked for chips and salsa. Yeah, you'll get them. Easy, Tiger. Settle down. I thought it was bottomless. You probably have some in your car or in your truck. No, I don't, and that's a racist joke. Probably in your truck. Probably in your work truck, your landscape truck. I am a radio talk show host, actually. Are you? And by radio talk show host, you mean shrub installer. Shrub installer. Honey,
This gentleman's racist. I was going to say, I wasn't sure, but thank you. Thank you guys for coming to Pepper Bellys. We appreciate it. Perfect. We will never be back at Pepper Bellys ever, ever again. And thank you for nothing. Oh, my God. Go ahead. You guys are just unbelievable. Josh. Josh at Pepper Bellys. Josh has a mouth on him. We're going to be playing Pick Your Poison again at 730. Now, we did this yesterday, and it was a big hit. L.O.B. will come up with a couple of different ladies. Now, we have to be very specific. This is not just a physical thing. We've got to decide between the lesser of two evils, but we must imagine ourselves in a...
committed relationship with these women okay like for instance yesterday she gave us Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan and we had to really sit there and sort of digest whether or not we wanted to be in a committed relationship with Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan now Woods Woods was infuriating me. I really felt that all of his answers were based on appearance. You know, I wanted him to look at a relationship, you know, and I felt he refused to look any further than their physicality. No, not at all. You saw inside their heart, is what you're saying. Yeah, you know, I look deeper than that. Do, don't, die. Also. Marshall Falk, or as Jay would call him, Marshall Falk, will be on the show today at 9. Apparently he's a football player. He is. And I know that Jay is not familiar with football or a lot of the players. And so when Jay wrote me and said, hey, would you like to have Marshall Falk on the show? I said, absolutely. And then I, as I was writing him back, said,
Oh, by the way, Jay, try not to call him Marshall Falk. Right. F-A-W-K. That's the way it's spelled, though. F-A-W-K. Yeah. Falk. Yeah. Is this Marshall Falk? That's even too good. Marshall Falk? Marshall Falk. Is this Marshall Falk? Yeah. He answers that way. No, it's Marshall Falk. Right. Hang on. I'll give you the mic. Let's talk to Mac. Mikey Thawne, October 6th and 7th, been announced. We're going to be watching Pretty in Pink and Cobra. Those are the two movies that we're going to be watching that night. It's going to be awesome. Your phone calls, by the way, 5701-949 if you want to call us. Dr. Phil, yesterday, man, that was the big news. I didn't see it, but the big news was George and Cindy Anthony, Casey Anthony's parents, were on Dr. Phil talking about everything. Do you think? Casey was involved in Kaylee's death? Well, the last one I saw Kaylee with was Casey. We didn't see her for all those days or all those weeks. To me, in my mind, that one-in-one adds up to two. She's responsible for Kaylee. That was her daughter. When you say one-in-one adds up to two, what are the one-in-one that makes it obvious that she has involvement? Casey and Kaylee, when I saw them leave on June 16, 2008, the last time I saw them together, and Casey,
again, is responsible for Kaylee, no matter where she was at or what happened. Now, you know what? Honest answer. I appreciate it. Were there any warning signs that you guys saw? As you look back, were there any warning signs that would have suggested that Kaylee was going to do whatever it is that she did? Yes, I do recall a Facebook picture. Of a hot body contest. That was a little strange. Tip. Little strange. Tipped me in one way. After Kaylee was born is when I started to see changes in Casey. Why? In your view, what precipitated that? Looking back now, I'm almost wondering if she didn't develop postpartum schizophrenia or some type of issue after her pregnancy. A hormonal type.
I mean, and that's my perception because none of those behaviors were exhibited prior to her pregnancy. Mom was really controlling, if you didn't know. Yes. By really, I mean psycho-controlling. We all know that Cindy Anthony doesn't think her husband had anything to do with it. Let's see. Cindy's asked about a MySpace message that she posted. It was on July 3rd that you wrote something on MySpace. You say, My Kaylee is missing. She came into my life unexpectedly just as she has left me. My question for you is, why is a 51-year-old woman on MySpace? That's my question. You creep. You just, I mean, trying to get some. You're a sex pervert. You're a sex pervert, just cougaring it out or what?
You don't look bad. I ain't mad at it. I'm just asking. Also, what's your username? Why do you have the Black Eyed Peas for your MySpace song? I don't understand it. I've never understood it. I never understood peas, man. I don't get them. I don't think the big fuss is about Fergie. How did you get these glitter icons on your page? I've been trying to change my background. It just has a bunch of letters and numbers. I don't want to talk about my Black Eyed Peas song. I don't want to talk about the skin. My page is so boring. It's lame. I've been trying to put this background. I heard you post the HTMI in there. Listen, Mr. Phil, if you can just be patient when we go into commercial break, I'll try to explain to you how to get the glitter skins onto your MySpace page right now. Let me at least explain the song. I don't even have a song.
It was a number one top 40 hit at one time. I enjoyed it. Can you explain how I get one? I've got a feeling. I need one. You need a song? My picture is, it's the size of my thumbnail. I don't know how to get it any bigger. You have to change the resolution on that. Can we please, if you don't mind. Taking her away. Jealousy from the one person. It should be thankful for all the love and support given to her. Kaylee was missing in my heart that day. She wasn't missing physically in the sense because I thought I knew where she was at. Did you know something then that you hadn't even admitted to your consciousness? Because what jumps out to me about this is the title of this is My Kaylee is Missing. You said this mother gave chance after chance for her daughter to change, but instead more lies, more betrayal. I wanted Casey to know how much she was hurting me. And I thought she was purposely keeping Kaylee away from me. It's passive aggressive. Such a strange mom. I'm sorry. You know, I know she's gone through a lot. It's just strange, though, you know? Woodsy, what's the latest with the Chargers? We've got a huge game this weekend against New England. Kickoff is at 115.
Everybody saw what Brady did last week. I mean, 500 yards, four touchdowns, just something ridiculous. Phillip Rivers had a pretty good day, too. So that game, like I said, will kick off at 115 on Sunday. Now, they made a couple moves yesterday. They signed kicker Nick Novak to a two-year deal to replace Nate Kading, and they signed Ogimdi Nawabo. Here we go, Jack. Nawabo. Nawabo. Yeah, Nawabo. Obviously. Ogimbi Nwabo. Ogimbi Nwabo. Yeah, he had been here before and they re-signed him to take the place of Luis Castillo. There you go. So much other stuff to talk about. We got so much stuff coming up. By the way, you hear about the guy that's suing White Castle hamburgers because he's too fat to sit in their booth? Mikey. Saw that one coming up, Mission Gorge. Yeah, 100%. 100%. Just right down the five. Yeah. I mean, it was like, you just look, and you're like, oh, look, here comes a fat joke coming down the mountain when she comes. Just threw him a 50-mile-an-hour fastball right down the middle. That's right. So anyway, we'll tell you about this story, and plus a very strange twist. You know the Gumby robber at 7-Eleven? Yep. Turned himself in. Good for him. Tell you who it is. Get it, the pokey? Get it.
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Tell me, what did the world look like to you when you first opened your eyes? Back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. The reason I've never been comfortable around kids, I'm always petrified they're going to go, you're short and fat. You don't skimp on hair products, you don't skimp on haircuts, you don't skimp on DJs, designer jeans, and you don't skimp on your teeth. Lauren. Yep, I admit when I'm wrong. And Jay. They will eat my edamame if I leave it out too long. On FM 94.9. Pick your poison at 7.30. That's when L.O.B. will give us the lesser of two evils. She'll name a couple of women, and we have to pick, well, which would we choose to be in a committed relationship with? It is not easy. It is not. No. They got us yesterday with...
Roseanne Barr. Rosie O'Donnell. Actually, that one wasn't too bad. We all picked Roseanne. Roseanne, yeah. I saw her last night on Conan. Not too shabby, pal. Oh, my gosh. I'm serious. Hey, listen. She's dropped some LBs. Her legs are skinnier than mine. I'm not saying much. Word of the day is residence. When you hear me say residence between now and nine, it's a huge deal today because not only do you get to go see Switchfoot and the Padres game. But you qualify for the big grand prize, VIP, two tickets to the game, two on-field passes, meet and greets, autographed items from Switchfoot, and their new album. So it's a big deal. Marshall Falk will be on the show at 9. San Diego State's own Hall of Famer, Marshall Falk, will be on the show. So on Jimmy Kimmel Live, they were talking about the story of the dude that is suing White Castle.
Now, I've never had White Castle, and boy, would I love to. Oh, it's good. Oh, I know, man. I've seen them. You've had the frozen ones. I've had the frozen ones, but I've never had the real deal. And they look delicious. But anyway, some dude is suing White Castle because he's too fat to sit in the booth. And Judge Judy was on Jimmy Kimmel, and she was giving her opinion about it. I've heard you talk about... About these nonsensical lawsuits that people file, I want to run one by you real quickly. And I know you don't have all the details here, but, of course, the New York Post does a wonderful job of summing things up. White Castle hates fatty's guts. Now, this guy is suing White Castle because he's too fat to get into the booth. How would Judge Judy rule just off the cuff on something of this nature? Well, first of all, I love the New York Post. Okay. Second of all... If I looked like this guy, I wouldn't be eating a whole lot at White Castle. Right. You know, sushi, perhaps. Yeah. But the fact that he was able to gobble up federal time by filing this lawsuit, as far as I'm concerned, is offensive. And before somebody like that can file that kind of a lawsuit or any kind of a lawsuit, they have to be prepared to pay costs. My costs as a taxpayer.
because this is nonsense. There you go. Now, how fat do you got to make the seat? Yeah, how big? That's what I don't want to ask a dude. I'd be like, hey, bro. I mean, how big you want it? Do you think Judge Judy's ever left her husband a two-page honeydew list in the morning? You think Judge Judy has ever left a irritated voicemail message on her husband's voicemail while she's on the freeway? Calling from her cell phone? You think she's ever told a McDonald's employee how to do their job? You think she's ever gone back to the McDonald's because she said small fries? You think she ever asked for her money back at the end of a movie she didn't like? I think her husband hides a vat of scotch under his bed. Guaranteed. What does Judge Judy like to listen to? Liza? Liza.
Liza? Yeah, gotta be Liza, right? Or Streisand? Streisand. That's what she'd like to listen to. She's probably pretty hip. Is she? She's talking about eating sushi. I bet she's a lot more progressive than you would think. Oh, yeah. She's got either, well, first of all, old school. Mace. And then, if not Mace. She's in a Kanye and Jay-Z's new record. Yes. For sure. For sure. In New York. New York. Monkey jungle. Baby is they do's. The Gumby robber, he turned himself in. Him and his buddy. It was him and a buddy. They turned themselves in. Sorry, this is my pacemaker. I've been trying to reach him. I wrote him on Facebook. You did? Yeah, and I've been trying to reach him to get him to come on the air. And his name is Jacob Kiss. He's 19 years old. And basically walked right into the downtown jail and went in there with his buddy, who was the getaway driver.
The getaway driver and he walk in and say, listen, we did this and we want to turn ourselves in. And the buddy's name is Jason Jarama. They're both 19. And so the cops take down their statements. They confiscate the big Gumby outfit and let him go. Now, wait. They do. Have a responsibility to give this evidence to the DA for possible prosecution. So it's up to the DA to see what the DA is going to do. Now, this is what I taught my son, Jake, the other day. Listen, if you screw up and I ask you about it, you have to tell me the truth. You might get in trouble. But if you lie to me, what I can guarantee you is you will get in trouble. It's not might. You will. And it's going to be really bad. But if you tell me the truth, you still might get punished, but it won't be as bad as if you lie. I promise you that. And I mean it. So I think that because dudes turned themselves in and as long as they don't have any criminal records and no one got hurt and no robbery took place, they may not press charges. Maybe probation or something. Yeah. Yeah. But I'd be fine with that. Hey, listen, like you said, Woods.
Good for them. They turn themselves in. What are the chances that one of them still lives at home, drives a hatchback, and the parents saw the Gumby costume sticking out of the trunk. That's right. You did not do this, did you? Please tell me you just happen to have a Gumby costume too. Right, I know it. Oh, by the way, yesterday we were talking about... That case that's going on in Aruba, Robin Gardner, really pretty woman who went to Aruba with some dude she met on a creep website. She had a boyfriend back home, went to Aruba with some dude she meets on a creep website and disappears. Wood says this dude took out a life travel insurance policy for a million bucks on her before they left. And she's missing. Well, anyway. They arrested the guy. His name is Gary Giordano. Guess who's defending him. Jose Baez. Holy crap. Same guy that defended Casey Anferny. He's a bottom feeder. Yeah? Dude. Well, he's kind of a top feeder now. Biggest cases he's getting. Yeah, he's getting big cases, but he's still dirty. Yeah, oh, he's filthy. He eats the lowest of the low. Right.
I think it would be hard to live like that, knowing that you're sticking up for people that are creeps. 570-1949 is the number. M1 Pros from Temecula. Are you there? Good morning. Buenos dias. Buenos dias. It's M1 Profe. I'm a Spanish teacher. What does that mean? Profe is for profesora. Okay. What does that mean? Professor. Okay, gotcha. I just wanted to ask about when your dad called in at the end, I didn't hear him say, I love you guys. I heard him say, I love you too, Mikey. Yeah, he was in the middle of a laugh attack. Oh, so it wasn't. He wasn't thinking clearly. Yes, he was. Yes, he was. DBB. He loves you. Don't be a baby. He loves you. Usually my father, when I say to him, I love you. Right. He responds by saying.
I love you guys. Meaning all of us here on the show. And I tell him, tell me you love me, please. He did. He just did. He did. Loud and clear. All over the radio airwaves. He loves you. You can't get more specific than I love you, Mikey. I love you too, Mike. It was cute. He's a little angel, isn't he? He is. I love him. The best is when he goes, hang on. What's the name of the... Yeah. Yeah, it's the greatest. Singer I like. It's the name of the... What's the name of the singer I like? It's so great. And she immediately goes, Vincente Fernandez. That's so brilliant. All he had to say. That's me and Jamie even after almost four years of marriage. It's craziness. What's that commercial that I like, babe? Yeah, that's like me and Matt after... Oh. Oh. Not negative years of marriage. You know what, though? You guys do have, you know, an anniversary for dating and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, it means a little less older you get. Yeah. It was cool in ninth grade. The lines get blurred the more you break up in between. No, but it's a reminder, you know, that you guys have sort of persevered.
It's kind of lame, actually. Yeah. It's kind of lame to have an anniversary if you're not married. Right. Well, no, I mean, I think it signifies that, hey, we love each other. We're still together. You know, we're still here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ninth grade, it was a big play. Yeah, you get used to celebrating that date, and then when you get married, it's like, what do we have, you know, I'm sorry, I should rephrase that. If you get married, then you're like, what do we have, two dates? You know, well, first of all, it's when. That's the first thing. And then, you know, second thing is, I think it takes a lot for a couple to be able to make it three years. That's four, Mike. Four years. And it's, you know, it speaks. Minus the breakup period. So maybe it's. Three and a half. Three and a half, yeah. But resilience. There's no doubt about it. A resilient couple. Like a cat laying on my feet. Okay. Well, either way. Very old cat. All right. Pretty cat, you know? Pretty cat. Very pretty cat. Young-looking pretty cat. Not a smelly cat. Nope. Oh, I appreciate that. A pretty, nice-smelling cat. I got that going for me. That's right. Let me ask you a question there, M1 Profesera. Where do you teach the old Mexican? Where do you teach people to speak Mexican?
I teach at Mesa Verde Middle School. You've got to give me the Verde now. Look at you. A green table. Mesa Verde. The green table. It's like on the Food Network, there's an Italian chef who's beautiful named Giada De Laurentiis. Giada De Laurentiis. And she's got to do this thing. She talks completely normal. She goes, so it's really wonderful. Today, we're going to be making a very fresh dish of macaron. Oh, my God. So she'll be completely talking normal. But then when she says one Italian word, it's got to be over-Italianized. Oh, dude. It drives you crazy. So today's a wonderful day. The sun is out. We're outside. And we're actually going to be using the grill today to make some Italian food. Now, a lot of people ask me, when you make your gazpacho, how do you... And I tell them, one thing to do if you're going to make a beautiful zette is that you have to remember to bake the zette the exact way that your grandmother used to do it. I bet her boyfriend's like, really? Don't you do that. Shut your mouth. Enchilada.
You go, Angela. Yes. Jay, in fact, I do say Angela. Identical. Identical Mikey. Identical Mikey. Que eso dip. All right. Well, thank you, profesora. No problema. No problema. Come on NCS. All right. Now, let's do this. Let's qualify somebody right now for Food Fighters for Foo Fighter tickets. This. is how we will do this. You need to call us right now if you are capable of coming into the studio on Friday. What we're going to do is we're going to have five people. And we're going to have five pies. And at the bottom of the pie is a CD. But only one of them contains a Foo Fighters CD. Whoever eats their way to the bottom and grabs that CD with their mouth, well, that's the person that gets to go to the Foo Fighters show. So call us right now, 570-1949. If you'd like to come into the studio on Friday and participate in Food Fighters for Foo Fighters tickets. It was up at midnight last night. When I woke up. Woke up at midnight? I woke up at midnight, got up, started my process. Wow. When I woke up, my wife was going to bed. Yeah. She was going to bed. That's weird. Yeah, it is. Isn't that strange? It's bizarre. It's awful. It's like the Twilight Zone. Yeah. It's so weird.
570-1949 is our number. Is it worse to be around in general? This is a generalization, so I'm going to ask you a generalization question. Who's worse, dudes or chicks, when it comes to the wake-up, the first wake-up? I mean, who's bitchier? Dudes. Chicks. Dudes. Chicks. I say 100% chicks. Dudes. Now, are you basing that just on you? Yes. Okay. Fair enough. Giant, giant butthead. By the time you get here, you're good to go. Oh, yeah. Yeah, for sure. So how long does it take you? I'm talking Saturday morning. You know, wake up and I'm like, just get, please. Freaking dogs. I don't want to cuddle. I'm hot. It's so hot. I'm so hungry. We have no juice. That's your boy. Every Saturday and every Sunday. Every Saturday.
L-O-B, you two on the weekend when you wake up, you're kind of grumpy? Oh my gosh. I just want, I like to ease into the day. I like to take it, let's start by just sitting up. Then we'll start by maybe putting two feet on the ground. Then we'll start by talking. I wake up and Matt's like, hey, good morning. And I'm like, I can't, I can't be cheery. I've changed. I used to be that guy. Now I wake up and silence. I don't necessarily, I'm not all about silence. I like a good banter in the morning, but my banter is me bitching and then her doing what I want. That's weird. Babe, please get me some juice and some French toast and some bacon. That's me every Saturday. And I do it in a way that's kind of bitchy, but she laughs. We have that deal. I don't know if I've ever told you guys what our schedule is. Saturday mornings, I get 7 to 9 to myself. Right. 7 a.m. to 9 to myself. Luckily, we're supposed to get up at 6, but the kids don't wake up sometimes till 6.45, which means that I've got 15 minutes until I take my two-hour time slot. Right. And during that two-hour time slot, I will make Rebecca coffee and toast. Sweet guy. Yeah. And then it's family time at 9, which I will be honest with you, it's hard for me. Yeah.
It's a difficult thing for me. I'm easing into that. It'll get easier for you. Yeah. It will. The older they get, it's going to be so much easier. As Jake gets older, it's more fun, that kind of bit. But right now, it's a little rough with the little guys because they don't speak English. I say 100% women are harder to be around. I think they're grumpy. I think they're gripey. And I think that they're difficult to read. Well, they are women, after all. But... You never know what you're going to get in the morning. I think it depends on the person. It does. I've been with guys that make me look like a morning person. Listen to this. L.O.B. says in her recap, Yesterday I was so annoyed with the neighbor kids. She says the neighbor kid kept saying, Just a nuh-uh. Just a nuh-uh. Over and over again.
So L.O.B. yelled out. Oh, my. Justin, yes, huh? Do you think that they said, hey, it's old lady O'Brien. It's a crazy bee over there. Stay away from old lady O'Brien. She'll kill you. I guarantee that's what I said in my recap. What did they do? My God. L.O.B. They were like, hey, did you guys hear that? Where did that come from? I sat there. Freaked him out. I was below the screen just waiting for them to go back to playing. And then I closed the... Like a creepy old lady. Justin, yes. Justin, yes, huh? I was so grouchy. I couldn't take a nap. There was landscapers. And I was just like, oh, shut up. I've been there with kids when kids are doing the...
thing bit over and over and over where they're saying, can I go? Can I go? Can I go? Can I go? And you're in a restaurant. And I go, yes, you can. Yeah, go ahead. Just somebody else's kid. Yes. I've had gay neighbors blasting techno all afternoon while I've tried to take a nap and have beat on the wall. So we all get that. When we come back, the story that I'm going to tell you is graphic in nature. It is going to make your skin crawl. And we're also going to play finish this sentence. And the sentence is, one of the most annoying things about the place I work is 570-1949.
Smoke, chill, party, and die in the same corner. Get cast, lift, ass, body. This is the Mikey Show on FM 94.9. The Padres' schedule is winding down, but the baseball season continues with exciting playoff action. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show is your source for expanded pennant race coverage and the best Chargers reporting anywhere in San Diego. And, of course, we've set up camp at Montezuma Mesa for exciting Aztecs action all season long. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show, weeknights at 10, beginning in October on Channel 4, San Diego. Baseball action continues exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego as the Padres host their series with the D-backs, 6.30 Friday. From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse, go behind the headlines and sports pages and get to know the real people who don the Padres uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego. There's a rumor that San Diego is home to one of the most brilliant, insightful, and educational culinary TV shows ever created. And then, there's my show. But it's big in taste and small in effort. Sam the Cooking Guy, Sundays at 5.30 and 7 p.m., only on Channel 4 San Diego. Hey, gang, it's your old pal Woodsy. OP Dubs in the house to tell you about Denny's Let's Get Cheesy Menu. I was actually on Facebook last night, and I saw that one of our M1s was at Denny's and was actually eating something off of the new Let's Get Cheesy Menu. He said it was incredible.
Just listen to this. They got a new deal there called the Winner Winner Cheesy Dinner. It's two golden fried chopped beef steaks covered in pepper jack cheese sauce served with a side of new creamy mac and cheese, broccoli topped with cheese sauce, and dinner bread. Denny's does everything bigger and better. Okay, so get to Denny's right now to try the new Let's Get Cheesy menu. It's available all day every day for a limited time only. And dishes start at only $4.99. It's breakfast, lunch, dinner, and dessert items. Okay? If being cheesy is a crime, then your boy here, old pal Woodsy, is guilty. Okay? Because I love Denny's and I love cheese. So feast on that. Get to Denny's for the new Let's Get Cheesy menu. Live from Progressive. Flo here. With more discounts than ever before, Progressive can save you a lot of money on your car insurance. Savings. Oh, you can get bigger savings than that. Savings. That's close, but you can really save a lot of money. Much better. Discounts for safe driving, owning a home, and more. Now that's Progressive. Call or click today. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and its affiliates. Mayfield Village, Ohio. Prices vary based on how you buy. Discounts not available in all states or situations. Live from Progressive. Let's take another call. Hey Flo, ever wonder if you offer too many discounts?
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Stacey finally took the steps she needed with the tax helpline. The first time I called, I got very emotional. They immediately put me at ease. Instantly, that day, I just had this huge brick lifted off of myself. The tax helpline is headed by a former IRS agent with over 30 years' experience. They can get rid of wage garnishments, liens, and levies. They can lift the burden of uncertainty like they did for Stacey. The best part is I'm getting money back. About $11,000. I cried out of excitement. I just couldn't believe it. The Tax Helpline has an excellent rating with the Better Business Bureau. Get help. Call 1-800-850-7184. I couldn't be happier with the Tax Helpline. 1-800-850-7184. Hi, this is Jack, founder of Jack in the Box. Let's talk to Ronnie on line one. Jay Box, I'm about to drop some knowledge on your listeners. Drop away. All right, check this out. I drop a monster truck limo. Want to know why? Because that's your job? Nah, bro, because I go big or I go home. Boom, that's how I roll. Okay. Yeah, I got a 99-inch flat screen mounted on top of my shock aquarium. Know why? Because I go big or I go home.
Yeah, well, I've got the perfect thing for you. My new jumbo breakfast platter. It's huge. Scrambled eggs, hash browns, eight mini pancakes, and your choice of bacon or sausage, all for just $2.99 plus tax. Aw, yeah. I'm going to get ten of those breakfast platters. Know why? Because Ronnie doesn't want to go home? True that. Because Ronnie lives with his parents? Yeah. Try Jack's new jumbo breakfast platter. It's scrambled eggs, hash browns, mini pancakes, plus bacon or sausage, all for just $2.99 plus tax. Price and participation may vary. This report brought to you by FlexYourPower.org. During hot weather, it's vital to conserve energy, especially if officials call a flex alert. By saving energy, you're helping handle the energy challenge. Updates at FlexYourPower.org. Well, it looks like we've got some slowing here this morning. On the 5 northbound after the 94, there was an earlier car that was stalled there. They've removed it from the lanes. Lions Valley Road at Vista de Chaperos Drive, an accident there. A truck hit a tree. The trees now block in the roadway. And in Escondido, a little bit of a delay on the 15 southbound between the 78 and the 52.
This report also brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners, your neighborhood Toyota dealer, has a $25 mail-in rebate. That's for any True Start or True 2 battery installed. Why wait? Visit the experts today. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBCT San Diego. The station is the Mikey Show. I know. Mikey. Nobody freaks out about guns and stuff. I don't freak out about them because my brother, I grew up around them. My brother had them the whole time I was growing up, so I don't freak out about guns. I like them. Woods. I flooded an entire Hampton Inn. Lauren. I used to be really into the Grateful Dead. Fantastic. And like the knob chomp of. I and Jay. I don't want to miss somebody calling this like, hey, let's go serve. Or let's go do something. Oh, Jay, shut up. This is the Mikey Show. Can you believe it? But Miss Columbia got reprimanded for going commando. Ooh, mamacita. 22 years old. Her name is Catalina Bilal. And the lady that runs the Miss Universe pageant is Paula Shugart, and she's like, listen, I know that girls wear short dresses, but this, this went way beyond that. I saw a picture of her not wearing underwear on the front page of one of the local papers, and I was...
Very, very surprised. She didn't even win, so showing her Wawa to the world didn't really help. But it did make worldwide news. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? I'm going to update you on the Padres in a second, but first I wanted to tell you that sports is brought to us today by U31 in North Park. I will actually be there on Sunday watching the Chargers take on the Patriots starting at noon. So noon to two. Nice. U31 in North Park. I want to tell you, the Padres lost again in extra innings to the Giants. It is their 16th loss in their last 19 games. Perfect. It has been a rough year, Padres fans. I had high hopes, and so did they. But, boy, it just hadn't worked out that well. And today they're going to get Tim Lincecum at 1245. It's Latos against Lincecum in San Francisco. And also there is a quarterback debate already in Denver.
The fans, if you heard him the other night, they were calling for Tim Tebow to come in. Yeah. You should play him. Should they? Yeah. He's a winner. In the NFL? Is he? Is he? How's he done in the NFL? If he was a winner, he'd be a starter. No, he wouldn't. Kyle Orton is, because Kyle Orton has more experience. Right. Well, so linebacker Jason Hunter has come out and said, listen, Kyle Orton is our starter. He's a human being like we are. Sometimes things don't go the way you want them to go, but you can't be so quick to jump ship. Kyle's going to bounce back. Everybody's going to be happy. Let's play Tebow. You know, I like him because he went to Florida. Big Florida. You like him because he has John 316 on his cleats. You give it a rest. You give it a rest, you Tebow lover. Mikey Thon's October 6th and 7th. And it's going to be fantastic. It'll be broadcast for 28 straight hours. It's going to be unbelievable. The Chargers are playing the Patriots this weekend. And it's going to be a kick-ass game. We all know it. Dogfight. I love our Chargers. Planet Gillette. It's going to be a rough one, dude. It's going to be a rough game. Let's get pumped up. Let's see. Marshall Falk on at 9.
Pick your poison at 730, which is a game that LOB came up with. She will give us a couple of different women and we got to choose between them. And what we're choosing is we have to choose. We're put up against the gun. We are forced to pick. I will be in a committed relationship with one of these women. OK, we also want you to call us right now and finish this sentence. One of the most annoying things about the place I work is blank. One of the most annoying things about the place I work is blank. Call us. I got one, I'll tell you. I don't want to hear about it from management. I'm sure I will. I'm sure we all will. Feast. This next story is going to get you. And when I say it's going to get you, I mean it's going to get you good. This took place. At a very unorthodox beauty salon slash spa in China, Zhongnan was bathing at this spa with live eels. Why? Because it's a, again, as I said, unorthodox beauty secret that they do where the eels will cleanse their skin when they eat away layers of dead skin. Come on.
Okay? Now, they say these eels will make you look 10 years younger. So dude wanted to give it a shot. He got in there. Zhang, he dove right in. And he let them feast upon his layers of dead skin. Dude. But after laying in the spa bath, he felt a sharp pain. And what he realized was that a small eel... was working its way up his urethra and into his bladder. Zhang Nan from China said, I crimed into the breath and could feel the eels nibbling on my body. But then, suddenly, I felt a severe pain.
and realized a smart ear that gone in to the end of my penis. It's killing me! It's killing me! He is 56 years old and was rushed to the hospital. He underwent a three-hour operation to remove the six-inch eel. Which, by the way, was dead by the time the doctors found it. I'm not so good now. Hideous. Hideous. My grundle hurts. Dude, that is so foul. It's the worst. 5701949. Finish this sentence.
One of the most annoying things about the place I work is blank. All right, I'll begin. One of the most annoying things about the place I work is our bathrooms here very rarely don't. And when I say they don't stink, what I mean is it's very rare that our bathrooms here at Lincoln Financial Media don't smell like a German outhouse. And when I say German outhouse, I mean... A metal festival in Berlin. With a broken porta potty. And a dead squirrel on the ground. Yes. And the squirrel's dead because it went... But when I walk into the bathroom here, I go... More often than not, I say one word. Really? That might be my bad. It isn't, Jay. It isn't your bad. It isn't your bad. In fact...
A lot of the times, it's because we have broken hardware. It's broken hardware. One time, Woods came and got me, brought me in there, and said, take a look at that. And I couldn't believe my eyes. Looked like a Jackson Pollock painting. A lot of artistes in this building. Somebody was brewing tea. Yeah, dude. Dear maker of spin art. Oh, boy. Dude, and I'm telling you, I'm telling you, bro. Every day, without question, I see some SOB with a name tag dangling from his doctors. We've done it, dude. Hold on. We've done it. The only time we've done it is somebody was cleaning their floor. Now, maybe that's the case. Listen, you poo on your own floor, all right? We got enough. We're in radio. We got a bunch of guys that sit on their ass all day drinking coffee.
There's 12 floors in our building, and we're on the seventh floor, and Woods is right. Guys will come from other floors to use our restroom. Freaking USA Today under their arms. Yeah, and they'll walk out of the bathroom, and we'll be like, happy birthday. HPD, pal. Dude, our bathroom is hideous. The smell in there is hideous. It's like a mortuary. It reminds me, and I'm being serious, every time I walk in there, it reminds me of a bathroom at the beach. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Moonlight Beach. Yeah, the cement, the cold cement bathrooms at the beach. That's hideous. What kills me about what's going on is the people that are parking downstairs, they park over the lines so you can't get into your space. So they're like, wow. That's a new thing. Yeah, get in your lines. Park in lines. How come people can't do that? Oh, by the way, I don't mean to throw my good friend under the bus, but Woods will do it. Yeah, I'll do it. He'll do it. I can't. Not here. Not only that. Not here. Jay, not only that. But I've said to my friend, I've practically pleaded with her. Where were we? And I don't remember, but I said, dude, please give me the keys and I'll repart. And you go, no. Where were we? We were somewhere. It was like a grocery store or something. Yeah. I know. I can't control my big ass Suburban. I can't. But how about if you can't, you get back in and repark?
Just open the door and look out the line right there. Like, oh, shoot, I'm not in. Well, yeah, because all it takes is thinking about the fact that you are pissed when somebody does that. Yesterday, I'm not exaggerating. There was a truck that affected four spots because it was the kind of diagonals that. where people back up, like, you pull in, but you go into each other, like the two... They face each other. Yeah, they face each other. He was parked crooked. So he effectively ruined four spaces. He was there when I went in the store in there, and it took everything in my power not to leave a note and say, nice parking job. Hey, I would like to do something non-malicious to that guy. I'd like to have his truck move to Denny's. Without him knowing it. I wish I knew a tow truck driver. Isn't that great? I would just move it, please. And just, and I'm sorry. I would delight in the YouTube video of him coming out going, where's my truck? And you could say as a tow truck driver, sir, all we did was move you to a spot. Right.
Like you should have done. I think that you guys are forgetting about the most annoying thing at this workplace. I know what you're going to say. You know what I'm going to say. Oh, I know what you're going to say. Oh, I know what you're going to say, too. Dude, the freaking time cards. Time cards. We fill out time cards. Domino's pizza delivery men are electronic. Right. Okay? 1985 called. It was Michael J. Fox. Just got a DeLorean and goes, why are you guys doing that? Right. I have to. I've got appearances on Sunday where I go watch football. I have to now remember to place them on the time card or I don't get paid. Right. So I got to carry around. I had to go into our lady's office yesterday and go, where do these go? Which pay period? And she had to outline for me. Yes. Which pay period they go on. Confusing. Oh, it's so confusing. Maybe we get into the new millennium. I'd be on board, man. M1HB from Scripps Ranch. Fill this sentence in. One of the most annoying things about my workplace is? Our meetings never start on time, despite our customer service standards stating they have to start on time. How long do they last? Well, we have our staffing today. It's an hour and a half. Every day? No, once a month. Oh, an hour and a half. It doesn't matter. Every meeting we have, they never start on time. So, of course, hence the nickname HB, I close the door and I say, okay, let's get started.
Yeah, she'll lock you out. HP means hostile beat. Now, let me ask you. Yes. Do they allow for questions at the end? No, we have like a roundtable. They kind of do questions as we go because there's like an administrative update from our VP and all that. So they do questions as we go. But there's time limits on everything. And we have resorted to having a timekeeper at each meeting. So everybody else kind of lets it roll. But me, I'm like, you have two minutes. You have one minute. Has there been a movie done yet? About question asker guy? Either in class or at your workplace. You all want to go. Yeah, dude. You're done. You're done. And thank you for the call, HP. You're welcome. You know you're done because the boss gets the same tone that you have when you're on a telephone call and somebody goes, okay. All right. When somebody goes, okay, you hear that tone. You go, oh, we're done talking. Excuse me.
Melissa, go ahead, Melissa. How do you see this affecting us, say, in a five-year plan? Everything you just talked about for this year. Well, that's a complicated answer. Complicated question, complicated answer. But you asked, and so let's take some time with this. Everybody's like, Melissa, you freaking monster. Can you speak specifically on... On a global level, how will this affect us globally? That's a great question. Thank you. And so I think what I'll do is I will outline our long-term global plan. Right. And you're sitting there and you're like, I just want to go to McDonald's. I just want to Coke. You were this close. You were... Go ahead, John. Hey, will you... I know you hit on it earlier.
a couple of times but i just i feel that it's really important that you reiterate the mission of what we're trying to do as a company and i know you hit on it earlier but i just i feel you know being the team player that i am that i think uh it needs to be reiterated so could you could you do that one more time i'll try to do it with brevity but uh i'm glad you asked the question i'll try to do it with brevity It's going to take about 10 minutes to outline what we're really trying to do. But I appreciate you asking because it's important for all of us to be on this page. And I'm glad that you were brave enough to say that you weren't quite getting it because that's the kind of workers we need. Go ahead, Samantha. Hi. After you finish that mission statement, can you maybe say how you envision that changing? Possibly at year's end? Such an interesting question because the truth of the matter is we do have long-term goals here at this company and we do see growth and we do see an evolution. Thank you, Samantha. But to answer first, to requalify what our mission is. And you're sitting there and you're like, you're looking at those two people like, I hate everything.
That you choose to be. Maybe ask him in private. Please. Please. Let's get the hell out of here. Let's get the hell out of this meeting. You're trying to impress him. Well, and that's the thing. You're not going to become the CEO because you asked that question. M1 Mexicant from IB. What's up, guys? What's going on? Well, I was just telling Kraft that I'm a repo guy, and if you guys ever need to tell anybody. Oh. Dude. Don't tempt us, pal. That's rad. So, I don't know if you guys want to play a prank on anybody at work. I'm going to put you on hold. All right. We're going to get your number. Hang on. We should tell our own, like, promotions band. That would be great.
All right, so we're having people finish the sentence. One of the most annoying things about my work is this is M1 Captain Mo from Poway. Hey, what's going on there, Mikey Show? What's up? Hey, as for my work, I love my job, but for school, one of the most annoying things is right at the end of class when somebody says, oh, by the way, aren't we supposed to have a quiz next class? And then the... The professor says, oh, yeah, that's right. So now we're going to go over what we've got to study, and we're just inches away from getting out of class and going home. I have an idea. I have an idea. I'm so glad you said that, Captain Mo. Thank you for the call. I have an idea. We will not attack you, but I want to hear from you. You're listening right now, and you are that girl or that guy. And maybe your answer is, because, Mike, I want to know. I mean, my education is important to me. Or maybe your answer is, excuse me for caring about my job. Sorry, I give an ass, pal. But I want to hear from you. I beg you to call us at 570-1949. I'll be kind, gentle, patient, all the above. I just want to get in under the hood and see. Because, listen, I care about stuff.
I just want out of there. I'm a little like that, though. You know I'm a little like that when it comes to work meetings. If we have a meeting here, not for our show, but like a corporate meeting, you know that I'm like, hey, we got that meeting today. I will say this. If I ask a question, it's a question that I believe, well, first of all, it's always politically incorrect. And what I mean by that is... It's not very kosher to ask. For instance, hey, is there going to be any more firings? It's that. And the reason that I want to say it and ask it is because I want to look at their face. And I want to see if I can read anything. Now, we had our CEO come into town, and I didn't ask, but my question for him is,
So what the hell brings you to town? Yeah. Why are you here? Excuse me, why are you here? What are you doing here? Excuse me. Excuse me, sir? I want to see the properties and see all the stations. Why? I'll send you a picture, Skype. Well, I just wanted to get out and check out the scene. You know, meet everybody. Making the rounds. See you in person. He's making the rounds. No, you're not, though. Yeah, I am. No, you're not. No, you're not. Absolutely. I'm making the rounds. No. This is my job, and it's like I have to go to each of the properties to make sure. No, but you haven't gone to each of the properties, and we know it. You've only gone to two. You have a lot of employees, sir. Yeah, but I'm just making, this is two, and then I'm going to do two in six months, and then another two in six months after that. I'm studying his face. I'm studying his face. I'm a trained liar. Can I ask you a question, sir? Yes, sir. You, the obese guy. Yes, the Mexican. The obese guy. Yeah, go ahead. Wow. Are you the janitor here at the station? No, I'm not, sir. I'm not the gardener. Let me just finish the thing for you. I'm not the gardener. Are you sure? I am sure. I'm not the gardener. I'm not the janitor. I'm not any of the above. Door man. No, I'm not. There is no such thing as a door. Car washer? No. Come on. You've got caterer. I would like the enchilada breakfast burrito. Oh, sir. The enchilada breakfast burrito. It's a combo. Yeah.
I would like to know why you're not saying the truth. The white man is the devil, huh? Pinata maker for the station. Everyone needs one of those. Burrow Parker. Yes. The Burrow Parker. Why are you the way that you are? Hey, Mike. Are you the Burrow Parker? Hello, and welcome to Lincoln Financial Media. May I take your Burrow? Yeah, go ahead and have it cleaned while I'm inside. I hear Anderson Kipper go attending with Snooki. Oh, wow. Got an email, too. We got an email, and here's the thing with email. Jay received it, brought it up. Everybody on the show thought it was a great idea, and I was the only person that was like,
What's the problem? Why is that something? And they're like, save it. Let's talk about it on the air. So, Will. Now's our chance. Let's do it. More from the Mikey Show coming up. Be a part of the show. I don't think it's that simple. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm beginning to like the sound of that. Talking about the AT&T GoPhone. Thing is awesome. unlimited talk, text, and the web. So you get everything that you want, and it's only $50 a month. And it's on the nationwide network that you can trust. Now, if you're thinking about getting a prepaid wireless phone, but you don't want compromise on it, this is what you need, the GoPhone. Unlimited talk, text, and web for $50 a month on the national Wi-Fi network. Now, check this out. It's a great phone. It's the Pantec P7040P.
If you've never seen it, Google it. The Pantec P7040P. Killer phone, and you don't have to get a credit check. There's no annual contract. Call 800-GO-PHONE or go to att.com slash gophone. Eligible device and minimum account balance required. Data package required for smartphones. Coverage not available everywhere. Other restrictions and conditions apply. See store for details. Football season is finally here and HalfPriceSanDiego.com has two great deals this week to the Beachwood in Pacific Beach and the Fleetwood downtown. The Beachwood's main level is home to the Chargers while Red Saloon houses the world champion Green Bay Packers. With tons of big screen TVs and the beach's largest HD projection screen, you won't miss a single game. Catch amazing ocean views while watching the game on the rooftop deck. Now equipped with TV. Drink specials include $3 Coors Lights and Mimosas and $5 Bloody Marys. If you're downtown, the Fleetwood The Fleetwood is the spot for Charger and 49er football every Sunday. Where $3 Coors Light drafts, $3 Mimosas, and $5 Bloody Marys flow all day. Make it an outing for your group and reserve plush VIP couch seating. The Fleetwood can accommodate any size group. Boat the Chargers and 49er games on 12-foot projection screens. The kitchen opens early, so bring your friends an appetite to cheer on the Chargers and Niners downtown in San Diego's favorite spot to eat, drink, and mix. The Fleetwood. Go to HalfPriceSanDiego.com for deals to the Beachwood and the Fleetwood this week.
Boar's Head Oven Gold Turkey Sandwiches are being stolen every day. To defend your sandwich, put yourself in the mind of the sandwich thief. Now, you open the fridge, and knowing everyone is off to the big meeting, you consider whose lunch you'll steal. There's a tub of Mindy's macaroni surprise, which you don't want to touch. There's a horrible-looking foot-long mess that's obviously subpar. Ah, there it is. A Boar's Head Oven Gold Turkey Sandwich. Turkey doesn't get any better than this. The best quality pure turkey without preservatives, without fillers, without ground up, questionable things. And so you swipe the boar's head. Of course, knowing how desirable boar's head oven gold turkey is, the sandwich owner may be ready for the thief. Gotcha! Oh, is this your sandwich? It looks exactly like mine. Nice try. Boar's Head oven gold turkey. Compromise elsewhere. Try a slice of Boar's Head premium deli meats and cheeses in select supermarkets, gourmet stores, and fine eateries.
Good morning. Welcome to McDonald's. First good thing I've heard all day. But it's only 7.30 a.m. I know, and I already whacked my head, broke my phone, and got a parking ticket. So I'm going to need to order quite a few things. That should make you feel better, sir. How about an order of sausage? Oh, and an order of bacon, scrambled eggs, three hotcakes, well, hash browns for sure. Um, sir? Oh, I'm not done. But all of that is on the deluxe breakfast platter, and it's now just $3.99. Seriously? Set your mornings right with McDonald's Deluxe. Technically, I fell out of bed and the window. Breakfast served during breakfast hours only. Price and participation may vary. McDonald's and SeaWorld have teamed up to give you a Halloween spooktacular discount. Adults in at Kids Price and kids are free at SeaWorld. Visit McDonald's today to get your exclusive SeaWorld coupon. Many locations now open 24 hours. You've been a good person. Coached your daughter's soccer team. Pulled all-nighters at the office. Planted trees in the neighborhood open space. So, who exactly is going to reward all your sacrifices, hmm? Uh, that was...
Right now through October 31st, at the Lexus Certified Pre-Owned Season to Change Sales Event, you'll get 1.9% APR on every vehicle. And everyone undergoes a 161-point inspection, is factory-backed, and comes with a three-year, 100,000 total vehicle mile warranty, roadside assistance, and complimentary loaner car. But hurry, because you're not the only one out there who deserves a reward. See your Lexus dealer in Carlsbad, El Cajon, Escondido, or San Diego. 48 monthly payments of 2165 per thousand finance. Call 1-800-USA-LEXUS for important APR program limitations and aftertales. Only a limited number of customers will qualify. No down payment required of qualified warranty is three years from your day to purchase or 100,000 total vehicle miles for outside assistance coverage only available in continental U.S. See your certified pre-owned Lexus dealer for details. Offer ends October 31st, 2011. Honda production is back at full speed and your Honda dealers of San Diego County are getting ready for a big fourth quarter. They've got plenty of cars and plenty of deals. Visit SDHondaDealers.com today. It's good. to be back
This report brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota Dealers. Toyota owners, your neighborhood Toyota dealer, has a $25 mail-in rebate for any True Start or True 2 battery installed. Why wait? Visit the experts today. See your participating Toyota dealer. Well, it looks like we've got some slowing this morning in El Cajon on the 8 westbound at 2nd Street due to an accident. The 67 southbound between Lakeside Avenue and the 8 pretty slow. And that drive-thru Escondido's got you backed up on the 15 southbound between the 78 and Villarreal. Rancho Parkway. This report brought to you by Napa this September. Stop into any participating Napa Auto Parts store or Napa Auto Care Center. Receive up to a $50 mail-in rebate with a purchase of qualifying Napa Brake products. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. This is Bird from Bird Surfshed with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Wednesday morning brought to you by Bunky Boys Clothing Line. Big or small, missed a call. Surf-wise today, looking at a pretty much maxed out southwest pretty swell that filled in yesterday. Secondary northwest out there with it at the same time, too. Looking at knee-to-waist high, chest-high ways on average. Top spots still seeing a few head-high ways, but getting less frequent as the day continues. Dealing with a pretty high tide mid-morning, later morning, so that will affect size and shape at all areas. Beach breaks kind of walled up better to sandbar structured zones as you would expect with a swell direction. And then the reef breaks have some waves as well. Top summer reef areas looking fairly fun.
Overcast skies will greet you this morning. Not much wind and water temp are ringing in the lower to mid-60s, too, so not that bad. Looks like another fun day at surf. For up-to-the-minute surf report forecasts, go to surfline.com. And for all your surfboard repair and restoration needs, go see Joe Roper down on Marina Boulevard. The authentic surf report can be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Anytime you're ready. Now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I like watching guns and blowing stuff up. Woods. All I want is a crisp, sweet apple. That's it. And you can't find it. I can't find it. Every time I bite into it, it goes. Lauren. I write bad reviews about them online. And Jay. She'll go on a girls trip and I'll go on like a surf trip or something. But if I have a choice, I would rather be together. Whoa, what am I hearing? Now. On FM 94.9.
If you are a resident of San Diego, it's going to be a little overcast today. They're saying it's going to be sunny, though. Tomorrow, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Hey, what's the temp on Saturday? What's it say? Saturday, they say the highs will be 73 degrees. Got a buddy coming in town. From Dallas. I want to make sure we represent. He'll be here Sunday, too? He'll be here tomorrow through Sunday. Sunday, it'll be 80. I don't get the whole Jimi Hendrix thing. I just think it's cool to say you're into it. But, I mean, it's cool. I mean, it's just not like, wow, it's so great. The legend. Dude, he invented electric guitar, basically. Well, that's great. I'm just talking about, you know. Eating the sandwich. That's all I'm saying. You could say, hey, he invented the hoagie. Okay, great. He's freaking badass. That's badass. He invented the hoagie. Who do you think Eddie Van Halen looked up to? Jimi Hendrix. I don't know who Eddie Van Halen is. Eddie Van Halen. Oh, Eddie Van Halen. Well. Jimi Hendrix. He did. He looked up to Clapton, too. Yeah. I know that. Clapton looked up to Hendrix. They all did. All I know is that when Eddie Van Halen plays the guitar, you hear all those crazy, you know.
You're like, whoa. That was before you heard anything. Psychedelic. Cafe Wa, New York City. The guy invented rock and roll. Great. But guess what? Since then, there's been a lot better. And so now we're like, why am I supposed to sponge all over the guy if the fact of the matter is that since then, there's been Eddie Van Halen. Well, that's since. Yeah. He was the first. Hey, listen, there's a lot of good explorers, okay? You know who the best one was? Chris Columbus, okay? Sweet. Great. Magellan. Hey, listen, if I was alive in 1967, when Hendrix was shredding it, I'd be like, far out, man. I've never heard anything like it. Right? I would take Jimi Hendrix over Van Halen 10 times over one. But you have enjoyed a fresh marijuana cigarette. True. So have you. But I hated it. You went through a period of dreadlocks. Almost dreadlocks. Wanting dreadlocks. You're trying them out. I would kill the CLMB with dreadlocks. Me too. Me too. M1 Jeff from Escondido, are you there? Let's see. You were calling...
Because you're the guy that I was asking for. You said you would be gentle. I will be gentle. Okay, so let me explain to people. I said I want the guy. It's the end of the class or it's the end of the meeting at work. They're wrapping up and there's always a guy that needs to ask questions even though everybody wants to go. And M1 Jeff from Escondido is that guy. Okay, what I'm going to ask you to do is put on the honest cap. Okay. Which means that you can not fib to me. You must be honest. Do you understand? Yes. Do you do it? You better be honest, Jeff. Don't you lie. Don't lie. Oh, no. Do you do it? Just a little bit to kiss up. No. That is incorrect. Yes, you do. You liar. If you weren't kissing up, you would ask after us. The reason that I have done, well, all right, valid point there. Thank you. But the reason that I do sometimes do, and it's not every single time, especially when it's like there's supposed to be a review for the quiz for the next class, or if there's like a homework assignment or something like that, is that in the past,
the teacher has come back the next day and been like, why didn't anyone ask me about this? Or no one asked me about it, so I assumed everything was cool. So that's, it's just so that I've had professors in the past kind of bite the student, you know, bite us back in the butt about it. And so what I do now is I got at least like, you know, wait five minutes before class ends, not 30 seconds before class ends. You know, give the teacher enough time to get to whatever. I would say you'll live. That's what I would say. I'd go, hey, dude, you'll live. You'll be fine. Put it now. He's a good student is what he is. Thank you for the call. Yeah. Good student. And you want to say it's what everybody else hears, right? Right. They all see how proactive you are. M1 Herald from San Marcos. What was the word of the day? Residente. You're qualified for the big grand prize. You could win VIP package with two tickets to the game. on-field passes for the Switchfoot show, meet-and-greet passes for Switchfoot, autographed items from Switchfoot, the new album, but for sure, you're going to the game and you get to see the concert. Wow. I love the Mikey show. Thank you, brother. Thank you very much. Thank you. Hang on the line. Let's see. So, it is time for us to play you Anderson Cooper with Snooki.
Snooki. In this clip. Oh, no. Oh, boy. I got it. There it is. Gotten real sideways right there. Okay. Here he is, Anderson Cooper, going with Snooki. Snooki. To a spray tan booth. She's known for that, right? Is that the bit? Yes, he is, too. Maybe I don't have it. We could reenact it if you want. What is going on? I thought I had it. Where did it go? Are you looking at... Here we go. Yeah, that's on tomorrow's program. We go... She challenged me on Twitter to go spray tanning with her, and I felt I was up to the channel. Let's watch it. We have a little sneak peek. He's here. Very excited. Oh, my God, you're pale. How are you? Nice to meet you. Finally. He wrote a book.
You might ask, what's the hook? She has a poof and little short boots and really knows how to cook. With Snooki. She writes about it in her book. Read it. Pick your poison. Let's do it. I'm in. All right. L.O.B. is going to give us women. We have to decide which we would be in a committed relationship with. Are you ready? I'm ready. Lady Gaga or... Octomom. Oh, that's easy. You monster. You monster. You monster for that question. It's the first time she's asked one where I'm like, I don't know that I can answer this question. You have to pick your poison. Oh, gosh. Jay, you got to start. I cannot. Well, I'll go back to my same analogy. There's been a lot of buns baked in that oven. You filthy monster. You filthy, you're a gargoyle.
I would go with Gaga. But Gaga also does not have sex because she's afraid her creativity leaves through her vagina. She would have it with me. Trust me. We'd put it right back up in there. Is that true? Yes. That's what she says. She practices a lot of abstinence. Witchcraft? Yes, that's you. I think that's a bit. Gaga. Gaga? Yeah, I don't want eight kids running around screaming. I already got seven dogs. Okay, okay. What if it's just her? Gaga. Better body. Yeah. 100%. Maybe Gaga and I'll try to change her. You can change her. Or she can change you, one of the two. That's really, like, imagine that. That's how bad Octomom is. That's how much we can't stomach as a dude being around Octomom.
I don't know why. Oh, my gosh. L.O.B. Octomom face. Octomom face. Holy smokes. It's the greatest face. Hang on. L.O.B. did Octomom's voice, but the face is incredible. Oh, my God. It's fantastic. All right, give us another one. I heard my eyes. Ours, too. Condoleezza Rice. Oh, boy. Or Janet Reno. Oh, gosh, darn it. Oh, my. Easy. It's easy. Yeah, it is easy. Condi. Condi. Condi, 100%. I think so, too. First of all, I think Condi's a bobcat. Yeah. And I just think that, you know, she's professional. But I think the truth of the matter is she's a bobcat. I do not believe Janet Reno's a bobcat. No. She's a bob. Yes. I think Janet Reno has the same sex drive as Martha Stewart. I'll have to put her on the list. All right. Whitney Houston or Paula Abdul? Wait. Crack-addled? Whitney Houston or? Whitney Houston right now. Just Whitney Houston, yeah. Okay, so Whitney Houston right now or? Paula Abdul. Zee Peasy.
I know who you're going to say. Oh, yeah, you know who I'm going to say. Whitney. No. Really? Oh, Paula in a second. First of all, first of all, I saw a promo of her for The X Factor, and she looks normal now. She doesn't look all weird. Yeah, she looks hot. She's not like, it's so good. She's got it in there, though. It's in there. I don't know. Whitney's lost all her teeth at this point. Let me tell you, she looks good, too. She does. She looks foxy. I don't even want to know, man. No, you don't. No, you don't. It took me a second. Jay, who would you choose? I'd go with Paula. Really? Yeah. You guys surprise me sometimes. All right. What's the upside? Like, there is an upside to Paula Abdul. Really? Yes. Her boobs. She's pretty, you know. She's Whitney. Not anymore. Is she? She just needs a cold shower and some attention. You can change her, too. I know you're in on that, babe. Crack is whack. And imagine her singing to you, ooh-wee. How dare you with the ooh-wee? Paula can't sing. All right. This is a doozy. Rosie Perez. Rosie? Or Fran Drescher. Oh, my God. Wow. Jay. Fran. She's got a pretty smoking body. Dude.
That was a bitch. That was a bitch. Like, please. She was not. Try to be more than intercourse. I can't. Isolate that. Try to think about the human being. For once. She's a better person. Because that was a bitch she was playing on that show. She's actually got, you know, some game. I've heard her talk. I'm going Fran. She's got a pretty mouth. That just repulsed me. Brian Drescher. Why? He doesn't like Mexicans. That's right. I'm racist against my own race, and she's not Mexican. Rosie? She's Puerto Rican. Puerto Rican. Oh, Billy, you're so stupid. There's no way. Like, where is you? How come you don't come over yet? I'm on my way right now. I'm driving over right now. Yeah, but I saw the way in Los Angeles. You're so stupid. So stupid. All right, I'm going to throw you guys a bone here. There's a lot of traffic out there. You're never going to get here in time. Shut up. Shut up. You always lay. How come you always lay? Oh, my gosh, Rosie. Shut your mouth. You always tell me one thing and then you do another. Yeah, all the time. Come on, I love you so much. I freaking love. I want to make love to you. Kill you. And then I'm going to slit your throat. Come here, let me shine your head. Shine your head and kill your face. Okay, are we ready? Yep.
Natalie Portman. Natalie Portman. Natalie Portman. Or Reese Witherspoon. Natalie Portman. Reese Witherspoon. Oh, with that chin? Yeah. She's foxy, dude. Is? Yeah, Reese is foxy. Natalie Portman would be like... You're so wrong, dude. She's so fancy. She's so fancy. She's so fancy. There's a thing against her. She's so fancy. He's got a t-shirt on right now with a picture of Black Swan with a... Circle and a line. Yeah. I'm so talented. I'm so fancy. Can't help it. That's why I put it in. I knew. Reese, imagine spending a beautiful Sunday afternoon walking down Venice Beach with Reese Witherspoon and her chin. Just a little angel. Now, I've got chins. It's no big deal. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Like, what's so special about that? She's so sweet and cute. She seems sweet. She's real. She's such a good mom. I'm in on the whole thing. Natalie Portman had a kid out of wedlock, so feast on that. And Reese Witherspoon got cheated on. Yeah. So she's all grateful. She's a beating. She's not a beating. She's grateful for your company. Yeah. She's grateful for your company. She'll let you do stuff. You guys want more? What even makes you think that? Just because I know. I know women. You creep. You look at Reese Witherspoon. And he goes, oh, she'll let me do stuff. She's damaged. She's got baggage.
She's hurt and broken inside. That's right. She'll let me do crazy things. He loves the broken women. My wife's not broken. I'm not saying your wife. Well, I married her. Just in general? Just in general. I think we all do. We all do. I think we all like broken women. I like the independent woman. No, you don't. I do. You're a big phony. My wife is super independent. Maybe she is. That's why you married her. Exactly. That's why you married her. But before that, you were probably dating Whitney Houston, crack apple. He's preying on them. Yes. If you want to call it dating. Preying on them. Yes. We all have. We all have. Not me. I never have. I really love an independent woman. I do. Listen, Matt. Before Kim, here's who I dated. District attorneys. I dated, I actually dated Janet Reno when she was still young and in the 70s. Gloria Steinem. Gloria Steinem, yep. Margaret Thatcher. Margaret Thatcher. She's crazy. Well, I didn't date her, but you know what I'm talking about. I called her match. Indira Gandhi, Cleopatra. Indira Gandhi. Mother Teresa, she shouldn't be in sainthood. That's right. I'll keep her out of sainthood. Trust me. Hey, trust me.
Little bunnies jump high. I have to know how to say the phrase, and we'll isolate it. Calling my home to talk to our Hungarian nanny, Nita. Oh, yeah. And we'll isolate it. So we'll be able to play it all the time. The phrase is little bunnies jump high. You know what it means? Shy girls? Sluts. Yeah. Shy girls? Those are the ones that... I'll put it on you. Hello? Hi, sweets. Hi. Hey, is Nita there? No. Okay. Wiggles concert going on. Yeah. The Wiggles just show up from Australia and start their little red car in the house. That's shaky. Ryan started crying and Jake said, no, thank you, Ryan. No, thank you. No, I'm sorry, hon. She's not here. Is that Ryan? Yeah, it's Ryan. Is he crying? No, he's saying bye-bye. He wants her to get off the phone. I'm changing his diaper.
He doesn't want me to. Now, let's do this. Put the phone in your shoulder and to your ear, and we're just going to listen in. Oh, okay. Watch this. Enjoy. Okay, ready. Can I just put the phone down? Yep. Okay, hold on. Okay, come here, bye-bye. Time to get dressed. I know, but we have to go bye-bye. Every time. It has to be a fight. Okay. Come here. There it is. Let's know what she's dealing with. It's a circus. Five-year-old autistic kid. She's trying to get ready for school. Ryan, who cries because she's changing his diaper. Okay, well, you know what? By the time you're ready to put your... Oh, there it is. And the freaking wiggles on the background. Yeah, dude.
By the end of it, you're Jack Nicholson in The Shining. I'll be in my office. She'll walk in and I'll go, darling, whenever you see me in here and you see me typing. That means I'm working. It means I'm working. I did that to Jamie last night. Jamie, I'm home. You can watch Thomas if you want. Wendy, let me explain something to you. Whenever you see me in here and you see me typing. Or whether you do see me typing, whether you don't see me typing, what do you see me doing? It means don't come in here. Okay, you can watch it. Just push it. I'm shocked. This is the first time in three months she's changed that kid without complete and total meltdown. Oh, there it goes. And it makes a fiery ring.
Want to blend it? Are you kidding? I didn't tell you. You ever just spring stuff on us? Yeah, I got a blender. We're going to throw three things in it, blend it up. You and Jay don't get to know what it is. Then you got to drink it and identify it. It's filthy. What was last time? Last time was tuna can with tuna juice, peanut butter, and a banana. You guys are monsters. Then there's tomato soup in there. Yeah. And tomato soup. Yeah. You guys are monsters. You actually have to taste it this time, Woods. I did, SOB. Don't worry about me. You keep your eyes on your own paper. Plus, people are requesting poop on the water. So we'll do that coming up, too. I fell into a burning ring of fire. I went down, down, down, and the flames went higher. This is The Mikey Show. On FM 94.9. Do you owe more than $10,000 to the IRS or to the state? Maybe you're being audited. Or perhaps you have unfiled tax returns like Stacy. I hadn't filed for four years. I was freaked out. I was afraid every day to go get my mail to see what was next.
Stacey finally took the steps she needed with the tax helpline. The first time I called, I got very emotional. They immediately put me at ease. Instantly, that day, I just had this huge brick lifted off of myself. The tax helpline is headed by a former IRS agent with over 30 years' experience. They can get rid of wage garnishments, liens, and levies. They can lift the burden of uncertainty like they did for Stacey. The best part is I'm getting money back. About $11,000. I cried out of excitement. I just couldn't believe it. The Tax Helpline has an excellent rating with the Better Business Bureau. Get help. Call 1-800-850-7184. I couldn't be happier with the Tax Helpline. 800-850-7184. 1-800-850-7184. Hey, gang, it's your old pal, Woodsy. And your old pal, L-O-B. That's right. We want to tell you about something that we did. That was really, really cool. We both got LASIK surgery. L.O.B. just had hers done, right? We did, yeah. Tell us all about it. A month ago. Yesterday, I took a nap, which was one of the things that I noticed was such a pain before, and I didn't realize until I could actually see. I used to have to take my contacts out, take a nap, get up. My eyes would be all sore. I couldn't see anything. I'd be out of sorts, and I'd have to put the stupid contacts back.
I'm trying to go on with the rest of my day. Getting LASIK surgery is something I thought about doing for, I don't know, 15 years. Finally did it. Went to Clearview Eye and Laser Medical Center. We met with Dr. Sandy T. Feldman. She looked at our eyes, took about 10 minutes. She said, you guys are good candidates. Then we did the surgery, 15 minutes, in and out, next day, 20-20 vision. Both of our visions have actually improved to 2015. Give them a call today, 858-452-3937, for your free consultation, or go online at www.clearvieweyes.com. LLB did it. I did it. It's been the greatest thing. It's a life-changing procedure, truly. Get in there. Tell them LLB and Woods sent you. See ya. Sometimes life kind of feels like, well, a juggling act. Fortunately, Cricket Wireless helps keep things in control with a cool smartphone like the Sanyo Zayo by Kyocera for under $100. And the best part is Cricket's great unlimited plan with talk, text, and data for only $55 a month. Way less than those other guys. And an awesome price for a smartphone. The Zayo's perfect for keeping up with friends and family on Facebook, Google Maps to get around, and has access to tons of other apps.
So do yourself a favor and get the Android-powered XIO for $99.99 with no contracts or hidden fees. Plus unlimited talk, text, and data for just $55 a month. Visit a Cricut store or mycricut.com today. So smart, so Cricut. Limited time offers. Requires new activation. See store for details. Data usage is subject to Cricut's fair use policy. Coverage not available everywhere. Terms and restrictions apply. Get the sleek Android-powered Zio at Cricut Wireless for only $99.99. Plus nationwide unlimited talk, text, and data for only $55 a month with no contract. Visit Cricut or MyCricut.com today. So smart, so Cricut. Plastic bags get airborne if not thrown away. You've seen them floating in the air. They blow to storm drains and then out to the ocean. And there, they can kill thousands of animals. Do your part to stop it and join the California Coastal Cleanup Day this Saturday from 9 to noon. Volunteers are needed at 85 different sites around San Diego. Bring your buckets, work gloves, and reusable water bottles with you. To find a cleanup spot near you, go to cleanupday.org. I was car shopping with a dream in mind and reality in my budget. But with the unbelievable rate I got, I could shoot for the moonroof and the five-star dream car.
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FM949 at checkout. This report is brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners, your neighborhood Toyota dealer has a $25 mail-in rebate for any TrueStart or True2 battery installed. Why wait? Visit the experts today. See your participating Toyota dealer. Well, it looks like we got a problem here on the 805 southbound before Mira Mesa Boulevard. It's a cooler that's in the number one lane, but CHP is running a break so they can get rid of it. The 8 westbound Fairmont Avenue, an accident on the on-ramp. And as you head on the 15 northbound at the 56, there's an accident. It's over on the right shoulder, and you do have a backup all the way to Bernardo Center Drive. This report brought to you by Napa. This September, stop into any participating Napa Auto Parts store or Napa Auto Care Center. Receive up to a $50 mail-in rebate with a... I like a skinny fry. I don't like thick. I don't like thick fry. Lauren. I'm a lyricist. Woods. Oh, I want filth. I want straight filth. As filthy as it can get. And Jay. I've got bees in my attic right now. On FM 94.9. I'll tell you, I would have loved...
To have been around during the day and been able to see Journey with Steve Perry when they still played stadiums because they were so popular. Oh, yeah. Stringy hair real good. Tight jeans. Yeah, dude. White t-shirt. Stringy brown hair. 25 years old in Vietnam. Went hunting with his friend. And a monkey attacked one of the guy's dogs. And after the dog had been attacked... One of the Vietnamese guys was like, I'm going to take it home and eat it. And his friend got upset and was like, you know, that's my dog. You're not taking my dog. And he said, well, he's gone anyway. And he started taking him. And the buddy shot him with a crossbow and killed him. Fair enough. Wow. That's a man's dog. Try that at my house. See how that goes. It's dead.
I don't give an S. It's dead. Dude. Oh, it's a dog. Let me decide what I do with my dead dog before you eat it. He's dead. He's dead. What are you going to do? Charlie, don't worry about my dog. I got it. What are you going to do? I'm going to get its ashes and put them on my mantle. Proper burial. Yeah, a proper burial for my dog. For Stefan. It's an empty vessel. It is not an empty vessel. It's my dog. You don't eat dogs anyway. Creep. Hey. Maybe he likes them. If he's starving. I'll stab him in his throat. With a pen. We don't have to. He's gone. I'm taking him home. Taking my dog home. I'm going to give him a proper burial. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, I told you yesterday about Manny Ramirez, who is in a little bit of trouble. Here's the 911 call from his wife, Juliana, talking about how Manny has beaten her up. Mom, what is your emergency? Hi, my husband just hit me. What's the address where this happened at, ma'am? What city? What city is that, hon? Weston, Florida. Is that a house or an apartment? House. Is he still inside? Yes. Do you need an ambulance? No. What is your name? Are you inside or outside? I'm here. He's here. What's the phone number? He doesn't have to do anything anymore. And he's inside with you? Yeah. Where did he hit you? In the face? In my face, with my head in the bed. I have a bump in my head. You don't need rescue, you sure? No, I'm sure. What's his name?
All right, we'll send somebody over. Are you in a room that you can stay away from him? No, he's not doing anything anymore because he knows I'm calling the police. All right, we'll send somebody over, okay? Thanks. Thank you. Yeah, they let him out of jail yesterday on a $2,500 bond where he proceeded to then a reporter had a microphone, grabbed that from her, threw it down, then tried to grab another one from another reporter and then got in his car and was speaking furiously in Spanish and left. Oh, wow. Well done, Manuel. No, I would never relish in a woman getting beaten up. That would make me a monster. No, you relished in the fact that it was Manny Ramirez. Oh, no, I would never relish in the fact of a woman getting hit. Ever. If it was A-Rod, I'd be doing the same story. Trust me. What? I think it's weak. What? Yeah, hell yeah. Hell yeah. Kid doesn't stand for the wife beating. Oh, no, you don't stand for the wife beating.
Does it make me a little happy that it's Manny Ramirez? Sure, it does. Of course it does. Wouldn't be a Yankee fan if it didn't, my friend. Marshall Falk will be on the show at 9. And let's see. You guys ready to blend it? Mm-hmm. All right. Jay and Woods, you guys have to leave the studio. Perfect. And Cross is not here today. And so Alan is filling in. Alan has all the secret ingredients that Chris left behind for him. Jay, what are you doing? Why is Jay... They need Jay out of there. They can't hear out there, can they? Check, Alan. It's Alan. Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Test one, two. Test one, two. Test one, two. Can't hear? Okay, good. They better not go to a radio. Okay, Alan, what do you have? Tell us in the microphone. Pull that microphone up and tell us what the ingredients are. All right, we've got some pickles, full pickles, some peanut butter covered pretzels, and half and half. That's not bad. It's gross. It's pretty gross. I'm trying to think. Full on pickles. That won't be that bad to me because cream mixed with peanut butter is not bad at all. That won't be bad, but pickles with it? Yeah, there's a lot of pickles. There's a lot. All right, blend that up. Half and half is so much thicker than milk.
And then hit puree if you got it. How thick do you want it? No, no, no. We want it like liquefied. Yeah, the one on the far right. There you go. There we go. You're listening to Blend It. And what we do is we throw a bunch of garbage into a blender. We puree it until it is just absolutely liquefied. Then we pour it into two different cups. And we let the boys drink it and try to identify. what they're drinking. Oh, yeah. I think we're good. All right, we are now going to pour the contents into two separate cups. I don't want to bring them back in until it's in the cups. It looks like a banana smoothie. Yeah, it doesn't look bad. It looks like a banana smoothie. They should be stoked. Gosh darn, they're brave dudes. I would not do this. I'm going to taste it after they do. You are? I'm curious. Oh, L-O-B. It kind of does. It does. It does look like eggnog. All right, let's call them in. Okay. Let's call them in. All right. Bring in the clowns. You guys ready? I don't think so. Woods already got a look on his face like he's... Oh, dude. That looks foul. Pull the microphone. What do you smell? I smell like salad dressing of something. Me too. Son of a bee. Oh, Mikey. What do you smell?
It's like a tartar sauce. Look at Woods. I can't. Oh, gosh. I've got a cold. He's getting the trash can ready. Man. For sure, there's like a... Hey, Woods. What? Pickles. Hey, listen. No baby stuff, dude. Have you guys sipped it yet? No. I'm just smelling it right now. Hey, listen. Woods took baby drink. This time, Woods... Shut it. I want you to get it. No! Uh-uh. Don't do that, Woods. Don't. Don't. Hey, do you smell pickles? Woods, don't. He's dipping his finger in. I don't want to gulp this. I'm going to gulp. I'll take a sip. Go ahead. Here we go. Go ahead. A big... I need a big... I don't care why she... Oh, Jay's got mustache on him. He's got a mustache on his mustache. Don't you just touch your lips. You touched your lips, Woods. Pickles for sure. You touched your lips. What else is in there? No. Woods. Woods. It's nutty. I want you to sell out for this show. Sell out for this show. What is that? Sell it. Drink it.
This is Uncle Victor for drinking. Take a big gulp. Man, pickles hide everything else in there. Woods. Dude, I'm drinking. Shut up. You have a thimble full. You do it. What's the white stuff? Ranch. Get it, Woods. I did. It's like a mayonnaise. Woods, please. Get after it. Get after it. Get after it. Is it mayonnaise? He spit into the trash. Yeah, we're right about pickles, all right? Yes. Pickles are in there. You've gotten one of the three. Get after it. I'm getting after it. It's horrible. It's hideous. Yuck. I got my head numb. I don't know. I can't think of anything else. Pickles take over. But it's chunky. Very viscous. Oh, gosh. She's going to blow. It's like an oatmeal. Is it a bar? No. It's like an oatmeal.
It's like a ranch and like an oatmeal. Ranch and oatmeal is what it tastes like to Jay. Yeah, ranch and oatmeal. How nasty would that be? It's pickles. Pickles, ranch and oatmeal. It's pickles. It's half and half. I can't taste the half and half. And it's pretzel, peanut butter pretzels. Oh, that's what that is. That's the worst. Can I have a taste of it? Yeah. No, you don't want to drink after me. Oh. You're sick. Oh, that's right. Okay. Thanks for that bit. Yeah. That's so fun. Oh, I love that new thing we're doing. Nothing like vomiting. I could never do it. It's so bad. The smell got... You know me and smells? I can smell the pickles. You know me and smells. Pickles. They were five feet away from me. I can still smell the pickles. You know me. If I smell it and it's bad, it's coming up. It's hideous. I took one gulp and it instantly vomited. That made me really laugh. I saw stars, dude, and my grundle tensed up.
Kill me. You're out there counting stars. Yeah. Mexicans ever just dump sewage into our ocean? Yeah, there is. Women are twice as likely to break into their partner's email and Facebook. Weird. They're also twice as likely to start fights about what they find. L.O.B. In the survey. L.O.B. Every woman? In the survey. About 20% of women admitted they've broken into their partner's email or Facebook. Higher. Half as many men, 10%, have done the same. The survey also found 15% of women have used the info that they found to start a fight. Higher. Less than half as many men have done the same, 7%. LOB, what have you ever found and started a fight about? I started a fight.
with Matt back in the MySpace days. MySpace would get you. He didn't have a computer, used my computer to get into MySpace. And I was in my inbox, which I thought was my inbox. And it was a girl and I was like, what the heck? And I didn't recognize her name or anything like that. And she asked him on a date. Not his fault. That's not his fault. Asked him on a date and he said, I'm flattered because you're such an attractive girl. However, I'm in a relationship. That's an honorable guy. But we should still hang out as friends sometimes. Whoa. That's a little bit risky. That was the part that got me. Just in case. That's what I said. He said no. He just worked with the girl and was trying to let her down easy. Oh, that's nice. Well, yeah, but then why add the part about we should hang out? Because they work together. That was my point of contention. Because they work together and he didn't want it to be weird at work. I think it's hysterical when Woods does that. What? You know. What? Logic? Yeah. Logic. Guy logic. Male logic. That's exactly what he was doing. Hey, listen.
It's the reason that guys love Woods. It's the reason that boyfriend Matt Commerce loves Woods. He must give you a fist bump when he sees you. Thanks for having me on that one. Appreciate it. That's true, though. I mean, he worked with her. I believed him. I just still thought it didn't hurt that she was an attractive girl. Woods just winked at me, L-O-B. No, I did not wink. I think Matt did the right thing. He just winked at me. And, you know, he wanted to keep it normal, which is just funny. You got to do it if you work with somebody. You got to keep it normal. I was with it right up until we should hang out sometime. Yeah. No, we should hang out as friends sometime. That's good. He's fine there. Yeah. Not we should have intercourse or, yeah, you should be my lunchtime thing. Yeah. I have a girlfriend, so don't blow that for me. Right. Well. Let's find a way to do it secretly. Yeah. Is what I interpreted it as. Yeah. I got an email for you. Now, this email, we had some disagreement on.
I don't think there's anything wrong with it. And everybody on this show thought that there was something wrong with this. Mikey, a few friends and I went camping with my new girlfriend over the Labor Day weekend. I've only been going out with this girlfriend a few weeks. So the camping trip was a great opportunity for us to get away from it all. As soon as we got to the campsite, my girlfriend opened her bag and whipped out an iPad. She brought her iPhone, too. We obviously didn't have Wi-Fi at the campsite, so I thought it was weird that she brought electronics. Is it unusual to bring an iPad camping? Shouldn't my girlfriend want to spend time with me on a trip instead of her electronics? I'm a little worried that this means she's high maintenance. That's M1 James. Well, James, let me put your mind at ease. I think it's very normal for people to bring a book while they go camping because they want to read a book.
And that is precisely what you can use your iPad for, to read a book. I think it's irresponsible to not take your phone. Because when you're going back home, if anything happens, you want to be able to have a phone. So the phone, I got no problem with. The iPad, I'm guessing she brought. She knows she doesn't get service either. And so the reason I'm guessing she brought that iPad is because there's a lot of stuff on the iPad. There's books. What about 3G? Yeah, maybe there's 3G on it. Okay, so what if she's sitting there looking at Perez Hilton while everybody's camping? Let's say she didn't use it for a book. Let's say she's looking at Perez Hilton and TMZ. And she's there, you're all camping, and everyone's having some cocktails. Oh my gosh, look, Kim Kardashian got married. Look at her dress. Do you have a problem with that? He didn't say that that's what she was doing. But if she was, yeah, that'd be rude. She's a monster. That'd be rude. But it isn't rude to read a book while people are relaxing. Two weeks into a relationship, you're going camping, and you're going to read a book when we could be interacting? Yeah. By interacting, he means making love. I mean, six months in, maybe a year in, it's like, hey, you know, let's just chill. Dude, when you go camping, don't you just want to relax and there's a few hours out of the day that you just want to read a book and take a nap? There's so much that can get...
broken and go wrong with bringing your iPad camping. You shouldn't even do it. It could rain. You're talking about protecting a device now. Well, it's just irresponsible and I believe high maintenance to be like, gosh, you can't even go to the library and rent a book. You need to check out a book. You need to bring this fancy couple hundred dollars, however much it is. So you're telling me that you got an iPad and it's got your books on it and L.O.B. wants me to go to the freaking library. No, I see you leave your book at home. Yeah, leave your book at home. Leave your book at home, but if you want a book. No, go camp, go run around. Yeah, go hiking. Hiking, Mikey, bike riding, riverboat, paddling, fishing. Fishing, smoking marijuana cigarettes. Climbing. Drinking, drum circle. I'm going to do all that stuff except for the marijuana.
I'm going to do all that stuff. Are you? Yeah, I'm going to fish. I'm going to do that stuff. But you know what? Leave your freaking... I want time to read a book, too. Leave your iPad out. When will you read the book? Because it's going to be dark when we're back at the campus. Two o'clock in the afternoon, I'm going to read, and then I'm going to take a nap. That's when the hike is planned. Hey, Bill Gates, just leave it at home. You don't need it. You're fine. Just go camp. Read the book when you get home. Hey, Bear Grylls. Hey, you go to a... Take it easy. Maybe you just relax. You take it to a ball game. I mean, just leave it at home. Just survive. Just leave it at home. You can do it. 570-1949. Like you with yours at the beach. You're wrong with that? I was reading a book. Then get a book. Why? Carry a book. Why? I got 80 books. Because it's pretentious. You get it. It's irresponsible. And it's irresponsible. Is it? Expensive piece of equipment. Just leave the computers at home. Who do we think we are now? Who do we think we are? We think that we are people that have a small little pad. You know what else is small? A little book. A little book. Bible fit in your back pocket. You know what? I got 500 Bibles on that iPad. I got 500 books on there. I read whatever book I want. Maybe go to the beach and relax. Get in the water. Splash around. You know what? If that's what you like, knock yourself out. You know what I mean?
Knock yourself out. Who do we think we are these days? Men in Black or something? Yeah, what are we, Men in Black over here? We just need electronics with us at all times. Mikey Show. iTunes Library. There you go. What? Yeah, iTunes Library. Sitting there listening to, you're sitting there, you can listen to your music. Oh, crazy idea. You're going to go camping and listen to your music on your iPad. Crazy. See? It's got more than one use, guys. I think the bigger problem is it's two weeks into a relationship. I would be ultimately focused on you. What? Ultimately focused on you. M1 Stephanie from Oceanside. Hi. Yeah, I think you should just leave your electronic devices at home when you're out in nature. You just need to enjoy it as it's intended. You know what I think is rad? I think it's rad when people go camping in Yosemite and they've got... A DirecTV dish on top of their camper. Oh, shut your mouth. That's rad. That's rad. The way to go there. Oh, my gosh. Go outside. Everything's turned off. You turn all the layers off. Yeah, why would you go? Stars are out. I wonder why kids are obese these days. Just play a video game. Don't play outside. Don't play outside. God forbid. Watch DirecTV. Hey, Seinfeld's on. Mikey's a poster child for electronics on camp outs. What's a poster? Yeah, I mean.
I don't know. I just would leave it at home. That's right. Hallelujah, Stephanie. Thank you, Stephanie. You're welcome. That's my favorite bit. Oh, yeah. It's the best bit. What's blank? What's a pollster, child? What's golf? I love it. I didn't say anything else. Jay's favorite. Who's Marshall Falk? Who's Taylor Swift? Taylor Swift. Who's Taylor Swift? If there's any M1s coming in at 9, can you bring me some Tums, please? I'm dying right now because I just vomited, so I'm sorry. How do you not... I just vomited. I know, dude, but like... I ran out. I'm sorry. Pop some, like, candy. Hey, we went to Disneyland. He had to go to the first aid department at Disneyland, and all they would give him is two, so I had to sign up for two so that he could have four. That's true. Then Jamie and I had to go back later. I'm in shock. Please bring me Tom. Somebody, I'm dying. It's unbelievable. Oh, my God. It's better than I thought. Let your voice be heard on The Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949 or shoot him a text. 949mikey at gmail.com. More of The Mikey Show coming up in minutes.
on FM 94.9. Hey, it's Hillary with some shows for you to go check out. Well, the two FM 94.9 Bon Iver shows are both sold out. But Saturday night, you can go see Reverend Horton Heat at 4th and B. Sunday, Switchfoot will play after the Padres Diamondbacks game at Petco Park. Lady Trons at House of Blues on the 23rd. The mother hips are at the belly up the same night. On the 24th, FM 94.9 presents TV on the radio with Arctic Monkeys at the Open Air Theater. On the 27th, see Bush at 4th and B. portugal the man hit house of blues september 30th and that same night you can see peter bjorn and john at the belly up and still to come blitz and trapper with dawes and about the music show with the pains of being pure at heart ryan adams cut copy the naked and famous foo fighters colts boxer rebellion city and color with hacienda that's at the house of blues in november also black joe lewis and the honeybears company of thieves morrissey and peter murphy so there you have it get out there and see some shows for more concert info check
Shout out the FM 94.9 concert calendar online at FM949SD.com. So I'm at Verizon shopping for 4G, and I say to the sales guy, listen, I want Verizon 4G LTE speed, but I also want selection. And he goes, we've got a ton of advanced Verizon 4G LTE devices, like the new Droid Bionic by Motorola, the Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1, or the Mi5 4510L mobile hotspot that lets you connect up to five Wi-Fi-enabled devices. So I say, smartphones, tablets, and hotspots. Not bad. But in my head, I'm thinking. Is it the 10? The 5? Touchdown! And then I say, yeah, but is Verizon 4G LTE really that fast? And he says, yep, up to 10 times faster than 3G. Whoa. And now I'm going. They're going for two. Got it. Come to Verizon for the largest selection of 4G LTE devices and tear it up on the fastest, most advanced 4G network in America. Visit any Verizon store today, verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE, or call 1-800-256-4646. Verizon. Coverage details at verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE. Got to tell you, AIS is doing so much for you, especially in the economy. Yesterday, I was looking at stocks. They are so up and down.
Stock market's crazy. Economy is crazy. Yesterday, there was news about Obama's presidency and basically how we are in recession type times. It's gotten very, very bad. And basically, the deal is, is that there's got to be ways for you to save money. You've got to figure out ways to be able to save money. And AIS is one. Poverty rate has gone up in America. It is now at the highest level since 1993. Call AIS. 800-777-4247. That's 1-800-777-4AIS. I'm one degree away from standing out. American Public University has more than 75 online degrees. I'm one degree away from a quality education.
American Public University's tuition is far less than what you'll find at other top online universities. And I'm one click away from making it happen. To learn more about one of the most affordable online universities, visit AmericanPublicUniversity.org. September still means summer in Southern California. That means more time with friends, more fun, more parties. And nothing makes a get-together legendary like the smooth taste of Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila. Serve it at your next party as an ice-cold shot. Or enjoy a fantastic Cuervo Silver Margarita. An experience that tastes so smooth, it shatters expectations. Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila. Stay smooth. Drink responsibly. Jose Cuervo Especial Tequila. 40% out. What's your definition of success? Cruising in your new car every morning. Wow, I'm at work already. Coffee time. Walking in the door of your newly remodeled home every evening. I'm glad to see you too, Rocky. Yes. Oh, and you too, Mike. Saving time and reducing stress every day. Check my balance online. Stop by the ATM.
Now there's free time for me. Unbelievable. Come to San Diego's very own Mission Federal Credit Union with great rates on home loans and car loans, 28,000 fee-free ATMs nationwide, and exceptional customer service. It's banking for the common sense crowd. Open an account today at missionfed.com or stop by any of our 22 local branches. Mission Federal Credit Union. Your success is our bottom line. All accounts and loans are subject to approval. Mission Fed is an equal housing lender and is federally insured by the NCUA. At Boy's Head, we work hard to make our oven gold turkey the best it can be. It's pure turkey breast, slow roasted the old-fashioned way. But there's a downside to such excellence. Boy's Head Oven Gold is a magnet for lunch thieves. You open up the office fridge and find your oven gold turkey sandwich has been stolen, pilfered, pinched. So what can you do?
Well, you could get a cheap turkey sandwich from a sandwich chain, something made from ground-up parts, preservatives, and fillers like seaweed extract. Nobody's going to steal that. Or you could stand by your oven gold turkey and take defensive measures, invest in a padlocked lunchbox, set up a fridge cam, or simply eat your lunch at 10 a.m. before anyone has a chance to steal it. Sure, it's a little extra effort, but a great turkey sandwich needs protecting. And oven gold is the best there is. Boar's Head, compromise elsewhere. Try a slice of Boar's Head premium deli meats and cheeses in select supermarkets, gourmet stores, and fine eateries. Chronic Tacos now has two locations, one in Encinitas and one in Solana Beach. They offer fast, fresh Mexican food from third-generation recipes. Grab breakfast all day, or maybe some fish, shrimp, fajitas, or fries. You can customize your entree any way you like it with their fresh ingredients. Check out eatchronictacos.com. If a car drove by recently that made you point and say, how cool, what is that?
Chances are you spotted the all-new Ford Fiesta, quite possibly the perfect car for San Diego. Yeah, it's a pretty big deal. Sure, Fiesta's a compact car, but you don't have to compromise a thing. You'll get up to 40 miles per gallon on the highway. Hey, there are 21 hybrids that don't get that kind of MPG. Seriously, the interior looks like the cockpit of a Learjet, and it's quiet. Spooky quiet. If you dig technology, you'll dig this car. Fiesta's available with hands-free sync. Say a command, and it'll dial your phone and play your favorite tunes. You're going to want to show this car off to your friends. And feel free to brag about what you paid. Fiesta starts at just $13,320. So stop pointing, wondering, and wishing. What is that? Just come into any San Diego County Ford dealer and drive one. Learn more at sandiegocountyford.com. EPA estimated 29 MPG city, 40 highway, 33 combined. Hybrid claim based on automatic SFE versus 2010 and 2011 hybrids. MSRP excludes tax, title, destination, and registration fees. Optional equipment not included. See dealer for details. This report brought to you by Jack in the Box. Try Jack's new jumbo breakfast platter. Eight mini pancakes, scrambled eggs, hash brown sticks, and bacon or sausage. All for only $2.99 plus tax. Available all day at participating restaurants.
Well, it looks like the 94 westbound before the 15, we got a bunch of debris. It's all over the slow lane. Careful as you go through there. Watch out for a box on the 8 eastbound before Crestwood Road. That's in the number one lane. And the 15 northbound before Friars Road, there's an accident over on that right shoulder. This report brought to you by Exxon Mobil. At Exxon and Mobil, their smart gasoline works at the molecular level to help remove deposits so your car will run cleaner. One more way they make gasoline work harder for you. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. When I used to be on the radio and my name was Michael Shannon. And I wore suspenders. Woods. Don't lie to me, dude. You lie to girls, okay? You don't lie to me. Lauren. Yellow means speed up. Yep. Yellow means hurry up and go. And Jay. So what if I like to surf every day? On FM 94.9. Marshall Falk. San Diego State's own Marshall Falk. And also Hall of Famer Marshall Falk.
We'll be on the Mikey Show at 9. Don't go away. We have a really, really incredible interview to bring to you now. I've been talking about the anniversary of 9-11. Been talking about how it's been 10 years. And I said, you know, as each of the anniversaries has gone by, I've been real transparent about how they were not something that were marked for me. I didn't care. On the 10th anniversary, I cared. I cared with tears streaming down my face. And I don't say that to be crass. I don't say it to be insensitive. As each year went by, it was almost like I wanted to not think about it. But on that 10th anniversary, man, that decade, there was something about it, man. I wanted to remember them. I wanted to think about them. There's a new book out called Unmeasured Strength. And it's a book about a woman named Lauren.
Manning, who's on the phone now. Lauren, are you there? Yes, I am. Lauren is quite literally a miracle. Quite literally a miracle. Have you ever been called that? And do you consider your life that? I think I was given a miraculous chance that day by, you know, good luck, blind luck and fate to have an opportunity to fight. where so many of my friends and colleagues never had a chance. But I think it was a combination of hard work and determination. I made the decision to live, and I was blessed with the miracle of, you know, living beyond the parameters of what humanly most people would expect, given the nature of my injury. The nature of her injury was burns on over 82% of her body. On Tuesday, September 11th, the day that the airplanes hit the Twin Towers, Lauren Manning was a managing director and partner at Cantor Fitzgerald, which you've probably heard. You've probably heard of that company being in the Twin Towers. Walk us through it. What did that day start like and what happened? Well, it started with a call that had to do with...
A black dog, an apple pie, and a key, and I'll let the readers peruse that. Just shows you what fate can do in your life. And I got down to the office, the base of the World Trade Center tower, running a bit late. I walked into the lobby. Unbeknownst to me, the plane had hit above and ignited. The fuel careened down the elevator shaft that took up the center of the building and blew out. I was enveloped in the flames. I turned to run. I was pushed heavily against with the backdraft back into the flame. And eventually, as I struggled through the doors, was spit out on the sidewalk where across the way in the front of the World Financial Center, there's a patch of grass. I knew I had to try to get there to drop and roll. And the waves of pain and agony were unconscionable. And I felt myself going under. Made a very conscious decision. I decided to live. Seeing a vision of my young son who had such a short period of time. He was only 10 months old. And I said, I won't leave you. I haven't had you long enough. Oh, my goodness. Are you telling me that if you had wanted to, you could have made the choice to give up and to let yourself go?
Yes, it was a choice. It was absolutely a choice. I was covered in flames. And the agony, the pain, the penetration of the burn going deeper and deeper is probably, you know, it's what I think we as humans, you know, one of the things you least can imagine ever having to endure. You know, you burn your finger on a stove. some boiling water and yet that was in a sense what was being poured over me over and over my goodness okay so uh i'm guessing that you made it to that grassy area which is what you were trying to do the whole time and uh you wanted to be able to put the flames out i'm assuming you were able to do that is that the last thing that you remember no uh not at all i would be there for almost 50 minutes and during that period of time Two guys came running across the lawn, bond traders who came to help the very few that made it over. And moments later, those other people down the bank were silent and motionless. And they came to me. One of them really was, I found a place to root my anger and incredible pain, yelling, please call my husband, get me out of here.
You know, we were scrambling. The sirens are wailing. It's, you know, just absolutely a horrific situation down there. The second plane drilled into the building. I looked up, and it was apparent that they had come back for us. People began, you know, had been jumping at this point, and this same experience I was having below, and there were no EMS trucks pulling up on that side. Eventually, one pulled near enough. It's probably still 100-plus feet away. And this wonderful man helped walk me over to the ambulance where I got on, amongst other people that were injured, although less injured. And it was clearly apparent to me at that time that they pegged me as a goner, and I made my first stop that morning at St. Vincent's Hospital. measured strength. And she survived being burned on over 82% of her body and spent six months and four days in the hospital making her recovery. She's been on the Today Show. She's been on the Oprah Winfrey Show. She's been chosen by CNN as one of the most intriguing newsmakers of the past 25 years. Lives in New York City today.
I've seen pictures of you, and I will tell you, you are a beautiful woman. The people that did the surgeries on you did a remarkable job, and I think you look fantastic. Talk to me about that experience, and my guess is that when you come out of there, because did they have to put you into a drug-induced coma while you were going through this? Yes, for almost two months I was in one with many dire complications. And after I was brought out of it, I had to learn of the deaths of many close friends and colleagues and that the trade centers were gone and the Pentagon had been hit. And I had a wonderful team of doctors and nurses. You know, my face I was able to cover with my hands and certainly I looked. Pretty much the same as I did. The operations and surgeries I had were not elective, and they all really focused on functionality of my hands and other areas of my body to try to regain mobility, which became a constant fight. When I finally returned home after more than half a year in the hospital, that was almost really just the bottom of the first inning. I had scored a couple runs, certainly, but it was a multi-year journey to try to...
move back into what was, in a sense, a body that would never be the same and to try to learn how to relive my life with what were changes that would never go away and a certain level of chronic pain. Lauren Manning wrote, Unmeasured Strength. When you came out of the coma, I wanted to ask you specifically about the pain because my thought was that you would be on a constant. Morphine drip. Is that the case? Or did you feel the pain straight through any drugs they were giving you? During the coma, I kept breaking through. It's very strong narcotics that they use to manage it. And the pain was incredibly severe. I was in an altered state during that time. It wasn't a dreamlike, painless world that I was living in.
I remember at a certain point saying, I don't really want the painkillers. You know, I thought I could somehow push through it. And my doctor eventually said, as I was consumed by a penetrating pain, you know, burning sensation that never left. I had to learn how to re-stand, re-walk, any motion, use utensils, everything. My son and I tracked the same milestones, and here he was only 10 months old. I said, he goes, do you like pain? And I said, no. He said, well, then take the pain medication. It's going to take a while, and indeed, you know, it took years. But, you know, I had something to live for. I had been given the ability to fight where so many were in, and I vowed to avenge the deaths of those that were gone. And they've truly been a mission in my life, and I believe are a part of who I am today, along with. countless strangers around the world and throughout the nation who reached out to me with prayers and support and hope. I feel like I have been able to fight this battle with an army of just countless millions. And that's really why I wrote this book as a thank you to my sons to let them know how much I love them and to thank everyone who ever thought about me that never knew me, who just took a moment to care enough.
how much that meant and lifted me. And I hope people realize that we all encounter tragedy and suffering or dire things of some sort in the last 10 years have been tough for our country. But we have an unmeasured strength. You can find it. You can find that courage just when you think you can't take another breath, which indeed was literally what was hard for me to do at times. You know, take that step forward. Make a choice. to win, and although you may not win, you'll have won by just making the effort. Lauren Manning has written Unmeasured Strength. She was a managing director and partner at Cantor Fitzgerald in which tower? The One World Trade Center, the North Tower. Two questions. One, do you still experience any pain from your injuries? Yes, I do. And the second question is, were you there? at the ceremony just a few days ago. I was with my Kenner Fitzgerald family. We have our own memorial service. We lost more than one in four of those that died that day. And remembering them and seeing the children and everyone that has grown and really, you know, fought to move on. So it was a day of rejoicing and sadness that so much time has passed. And I'll visit...
The memorial, which we have certainly supported in every way that we could. And I'll spend time with my friends when it's a little less crazy down there. And I can understand that. I totally understand that. Lauren Manning, Unmeasured Strength. You can get it now. It's available anywhere you buy books. And Lauren, thank you for taking the time. And amazing story. And truly, truly a miracle. Thank you very much for having me, Mikey. And this is for everyone. This is for everyone out there. We all collectively went through it. And we're pretty tough. And, you know, you said you didn't feel anything for a while. And neither did I. I think we were too busy trying to move forward. This last one was different. This last one was different for me. And there's something about that 10-year mark that just...
reached inside my guts and just touched me in a way that I can't really explain, and I'm pretty good at articulating myself, and I can't. You know what, though? We pulled through, and, you know, we all came here for a reason to this country, and all those that have joined us, you know, we've hung tough, and hopefully never again. Thank you very much, Lauren. We appreciate it. I encourage people to get the book. It's called Unmeasured Strength. Thank you for coming on. Thank you very much for having me on. We'll see you. The thing she mentioned was that her family stayed by her bedside the entire time. There were hundreds upon hundreds of letters that came to that hospital from people around the world. And as she was looking over those letters, handwritten letters from so many souls. She says in the book that she felt protected all of that support. Unbelievable story. She knew her life would never be the same again. Again, 82% of her body had been burnt that day. And yet you hear it in her voice now. Exactly the thing we were talking about the other day. America, America is a really strong country. And as much as we're going through now, economy, just junk. One day it's going to be different.
I guarantee you that one day it's going to be different. Can break the will of a truly united states of America. They will remember that we've overcome slavery and civil war. We've overcome red lines and fascism and recession and riots and communism and, yes, terrorism. 9-11 can feel like a part of a different era. But for the families of the men and women stolen, some of whom joined us today. That day will never feel like history. The memory of that morning is fresh, and so is the pain. America shares your grief. We pray for your comfort, and we honor your loved ones. September the 11th, 2001, innocent men and women went to work at the World Trade Center. They reported for duty at the Pentagon. They boarded American flights 11 and 77, United flights 93 and 175.
They did nothing to provoke or deserve the deliberate act of murder that Al-Qaeda carried out. One of the lessons of 9-11 is that evil is real, and so is courage. To honor all the people that we lost on 9-11, and probably won't be talking about 9-11 again for a while. We knew we had the interview with Laura Manning coming up today, and you can get the book. It's called Unmeasured Strength. It's a good book. You should read it. We'll be back.
Hey, it's Hillary, and today at noon on FM 94.9, we're doing Desert Island Discs. So what three records would you have to have with you if you were stranded on a deserted island? Are you the Bob Marley sublime Johnny Cash type? Or wouldn't Arcade Fire Radiohead James Addiction Trio float your boat or your raft? I don't care if you pick Black Flag, Melt Banana, and Celine Dion. All right, let's not go that far. Tell us your three favorite records now at fm949sd.com and listen today at noon. Desert Island Discs on FM 94.9. Mom, I want to be a pilot. Is it tough? It's not easy, but you could do it. Study hard, go to a good school, never skip your math homework. Huh, piece of cake. Oh, yeah? But can you finish those carrots for your pilot's vision? Eh, I'd rather do my math homework. Thought so. There's a moment when an activity becomes an accomplishment, and when that moment comes for your child, you want to be ready. The Scholarshare Plan, California's official 529 plan, can help your kids reach their potential. It's a careful, consistently maintained college savings program, and your earnings are federal and California state income tax-free when used for qualified higher education expenses. For more information, visit Scholarshare.com or call 800-544-5248. To learn more about the Scholarshare College Savings Plan and its investment objectives, risks, charges, and expenses, please contact Fidelity for a fact kit. Read it carefully. The Scholarshare College Savings Plan is offered by the Scholarshare Investments.
It's often said that actions speak louder than words. And what better example than car and driver's take on the BMW 3 Series? They not only named it to their 10 best list again this year, but they did so for an unprecedented 20 years in a row. Is it because it's faster and more powerful than the Audi A4, Lexus IS 250, or the Mercedes C300? Or because BMW includes no-cost maintenance, saving you thousands over other brands? Or because it delivers a joy that only the ultimate driving machine can? It's time to let your actions decide. The test drive of a 3 Series today. Claim based on published 3 Series sedan and competitors 0-60 in horsepower.
For ultimate service details, call 1-888-311-4-BMW. For a limited time, lease the BMW 528i sedan for $4.99 a month. Visit sdcountybmw.com slash finance for details. Hi, this is LOB for Ovation Cell Therapy. A couple weeks ago, you may have heard me talk about the new Advanced Formula. I didn't really know what was new about it. I just knew the bottle said Advanced Formula and that it seemed that my hair was better than it was, but I really didn't know why. So I took to the image and I went to the OvationHair.com website and I started to read about what was different about it. They've removed all sulfates and parabens. Not only is that just good for everybody, but particularly for anyone that's had any sort of color treatment. or something like a Brazilian blowout. And I don't know if you remember I said that my hair was softer from the cream rinse. I really didn't know what they did. I just knew that it was...
like silky smooth. They've added five new moisturizers that are going to smooth and fortify your hair. It's 100% guaranteed. So if you give it a try, it's risk-free. They're going to give you 100% money-back guarantee. So go to OvationHair.com, enter FM949 at checkout, and you're going to get a special introductory discount. That's OvationHair.com and enter FM949 at checkout. Plastic bags get airborne if not thrown away. You've seen them floating in the air, they blow to storm drains, and then out to the ocean. They can kill thousands of animals. So do your part to stop it and join the California Coastal Cleanup Day this Saturday from 9 to noon. Volunteers are needed at 85 different sites around San Diego. Bring your buckets, work gloves, and reusable water bottles with you. To find a cleanup spot near you, go to cleanupday.org. Healthy living. It's something we all care about, and it's even more important to us as we raise our families. The National Children's Study aims to expand what doctors know about children's health and development, which could benefit our children's children. It will look at many aspects of children's lives from before their birth until they are 21 years old, such as family history and where they live, learn, and play. The National Children's Study is now enrolling families in San Diego County. For more information, visit sandiego.nationalchildrenstudy.gov. Sometimes life kind of feels like, well, a juggling act.
Fortunately, Cricket Wireless helps keep things in control with a cool smartphone like the Sanyo Zayo by Kyocera for under $100. And the best part is Cricket's great unlimited plan with talk, text, and data for only $55 a month, way less than those other guys, and an awesome price for a smartphone. The Zayo's perfect for keeping up with friends and family on Facebook, Google Maps to get around, and has access to tons of other apps. So do yourself a favor and get the Android-powered XIO for $99.99 with no contracts or hidden fees. Plus unlimited talk, text, and data for just $55 a month. Visit a Cricut store or mycricut.com today. So smart, so Cricut. Limited time offers. Requires new activation. See store for details. Data usage is subject to Cricut's fair use policy. Coverage not available everywhere. Terms and restrictions apply. Get the sleek Android-powered Zio at Cricut Wireless for only $99.99. Plus nationwide unlimited talk, text, and data for only $55 a month with no contract. Visit Cricut or MyCricut.com today. So smart, so Cricut. Studies show that performing an act of kindness can make you happier. So do something nice for someone. You'll thrive for it. Kaiser Permanente. Visit kb.org slash thrive.
It's brought to you by Del Taco. At Del Taco, get 12 regular tacos for $5.88. 12 freshly prepared tacos with your choice of crunchy or soft shell for $5.88. Hurry, get 12 regular tacos for $5.88. Only at Del Taco. Well, we've got some slowing as you come through El Cajon this morning on the 8 westbound between El Cajon Boulevard, the north end in the 15, pretty tight. Also, Escondido dragging on the 15 southbound between the 78 Carmel Mountain Road. You'll find some delays as you approach National City on the 5 northbound between the 54 and the 94. This report brought to you by Exxon Mobil. At Exxon and Mobil, their smart gasoline works at the molecular level to help you remove deposits so your car will run cleaner. One more way they make gasoline work harder. for you. I'm Stacy Cohen, FM 94.9.
Oh, my God, it's a Krispy Kreme. Lauren. My butt doesn't go straight down. Sticks out. You know, junk in the trunk. In the trunk. And Jay. I tell you, Kim got me on the organic ketchup, and then I went back to the Heinz. This is The Mikey Show on FM 94.9. Mikey Show Live. Got a lot of people in here today, and if you'd like to be a member of our live studio audience, real easy. Just go to MikeyShow.com, and you can sign up for it. It's a very easy process, and you get yourself in here in the studio. Doctors are saying that if you have a drink a day, it could keep the doctor away. A lot of people that are older and in healthy shape, they have at least a glass of wine a day, and it helps them and makes them feel better, feel more healthy, that kind of deal.
Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, as everybody knows, the Chargers will be taking on the New England Patriots this Sunday. Kickoff is at 115. It's in New England. Let's go get them, Chargers. Come hang out with me at U31 starting at noon in North Park to watch the game. Take a listen to a little career recap on Hall of Famer Marshall Falk. Over a 12-year career with the Colts and Rams. Marshall Falk became the only running back in NFL history to rush for more than 12,000 yards and have more than 6,000 yards receiving. He retired. His 136 touchdowns were fourth on the all-time list. What else can Marshall Falk do for this football team? Unbelievable. We got him on the line right now. Marshall, how are you? I'm good. How are we doing today? Good. Good to talk to you. That was pretty good. Thank you.
Hey, we're serious around here. I hear you. I hear you. Marshall Falk Foundation, dedicated to improving the quality of life for San Diego youth by increasing opportunities for them to lead healthy, fulfilling lives, which is a real cool thing. And, of course, giving back to the community that you were here, went to San Diego State. And how often do you get yourself back into town, Marshall? All the time. I'm here a lot, especially around football season. I find myself out here a lot. I work up in L.A., so I'll take time to come down to San Diego and spend a little time down here when I'm in town during football season. So, yeah, I'm here quite a bit. Now, there's a few questions I love to ask running backs, just because everybody's got a different answer, and I always love to hear it. Who was the hardest hitter? I don't know who the hardest hitter was. I was in the league, but I know the person that hit me the hardest was Kurt Gouveia. We were playing the Chargers, and boy, I was talking smack to Junior Seau. Happy to be playing against one of the local heroes here in San Diego, and Kurt caught me up against the head. Pretty nice. And you remember that one? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. D-Cleater. Oh, man. I'm always remembering that one.
that of all of the things that you have going on, I love watching you analyze games on the weekend. And that's got to be a fun job for you. Listen, man, anytime you get an opportunity after you've played the game of professional football or professional sports, to talk about the sport and sit up there and have people welcome you into their homes. It's special. I enjoy it. I tell people I love my job. I love what I do. It's fun. I don't wake up sore in the morning on Mondays. And whether I pick good games or not, my record's clean every week. Yeah. It's got to be a very fun job to just be able to analyze, to be able to look at this stuff. How much time do you have to spend? In study, meaning watching film, all that kind of stuff. Well, I dedicate my time studying the same way I do when I play. I'm always watching film. I'm always making calls, talking to players just to find out what their feelings are going into games and stuff like that. So, you know, nothing short of when I play, do I spend the exact same amount of time on studying a game when I analyze it?
We're talking to Marshall Falk, Hall of Famer Marshall Falk. Tell us about that day. It wasn't too long ago. It was about a month ago when you were inducted into the Hall of Fame. What was that day like for you? Say thank you to all the San Diego State alum and fans who came out and supported. It was amazing to see how many people traveled to Canton, Ohio to celebrate that moment with me. It was special to have my friends and family members. teammates there with me to celebrate a great moment in my life. It's got to be an incredible thing for you. Was it like the night before a game, a night before a Super Bowl? Were you nervous the night before? Was there trouble sleeping? Was it hard to go to bed that night? No. I already knew that I had won. It was all about saying thank you to all the people who helped me along the way to get where I was.
Or where I'm at, I should say. What do you miss most about the game? Just playing. Playing, being there, competing, having a sense of team, the camaraderie around, you know, being around the rest of the guys. All of those things are things that you miss when you're not around the game anymore. You know, this was one of the interesting things, too, that I really enjoyed, and I think you might enjoy hearing this. Kurt Warner on you. He didn't have the bulging biceps. He wasn't a workout fiend from the standpoint of... of lifting weights. And he didn't necessarily look the part. So many people would come up to me and said, you know, who's that sitting in Marshall Falk's locker? We all would just get smiles on our face and we're like, that's Marshall Falk. But inside of that exterior that maybe didn't look the part was the greatest football player that he would probably ever play with. There was not anything that he did that he didn't do well. That's what I think made Marshall Falk great. Everything he was going to do, he was going to do it the best.
What do you think, what are your memories when you think about playing with Kurt? Oh, man, the guy was a warrior. The way he played the quarterback position, for our offense to be what it was, he had to stand in there and take shots and deliver the football. And for him to brave it out, because in the Mike Marsh system, you can check the ball down, or you can stand in there and wait for that deep drop to come open and deliver the pass and then take the blow. So, you know, Kurt took the blow many of times just to help us get down the field and score touchdowns. Marshall Falk, tomorrow on Thursday from 6 to 10, is scheduled to appear with Randy Jones and some other celebrity athletes. $20 donation at the door, and that includes free drinks and raffle tickets. And what it is is a...
Live and silent auctions that are going to be going on. A really good dinner that's going to be available for an additional fee. And the proceeds are going to benefit the Marshall Falk Foundation. And also the Challenged Athletes Foundation. And how long ago did you start this, Marshall? How long have you been doing the Marshall Falk Foundation? I started this my rookie year in the NFL. Coming to San Diego State, understanding how lucky I was to be here. how fortunate I was to make it out of the situation that I was in, one of few to get out and even smaller than that to make it. So I wanted to provide those kids in like situations a sense of purpose and kind of a role model in a different sense, not just in sports, but in an accomplishment that you can get out of the situation that you're in. And when you couple that with CAF, Challenge Athletes Foundation. And what those kids go through, and what those, not just kids, but adults go through, it's amazing that we call them challenged when we look at all the feats that they overcome in life. Marshall Falk, when you come back into San Diego, where do you have to eat? Oh, man, there's no have to eat. I mean, there's so much good food here. I've been here being from New Orleans. I kind of fell in love with Mexican food, so I get around and I eat everywhere.
If there's a place that I have to stop to sit on the boardwalk at Tower 23 and to watch the people go by and enjoy the ambiance of what San Diego has to offer, I would have to say that's the place that I must stop. What is in your CD player right now? No CD player. I do have a CD player, but I listen to satellite radio. And what do you listen to? Any hip-hop, R&B, some jazz. So whatever they have playing. Favorite hip-hop artist? Favorite hip-hop artist. Right now, I would have to say Lil Wayne. Who's the better dancer, you or Warren Sapp? I would have to say Warren Sapp only because he has the cojones to even go on dancing with the stars. Oh, that's great. Who do you enjoy mixing it up with on the show the most? Obviously, Michael Irvin, because he's so passionate about his Cowboys, I love giving him slack about that organization and just where they are right now compared to where they were when he played. Hey, listen, I'm saying this, and I am not saying it because you're on the phone. I mean this. It's the only show that I watch before the games. Thank you. And the reason that I do is because it's...
It's not a bunch of nonsense. It's actual football, and it's really enjoyable to watch. And you're right. Hearing Michael say to you, hang on a second, Marshall. Before you think that I'm going to say this because I used to play for the Dallas Cowboys, hear me out. Hear me out. And you're staring at him, and you get that little smirk on your face that says to him, yeah, right. It's the greatest. It's the greatest. Marshall, thank you for taking the time and coming on the show. We really do appreciate it. And hopefully people get out there and support you with the Marshall Falk Foundation and Challenged Athletes Foundation. And get out there tomorrow from 6 to 10 and really donate some money. It'd be great. I hope everyone can support. Hey, thanks a lot, Marshall. We'll see you later. All right. It's Marshall Falk. I remember a spring pass that we threw against Minnesota Vikings. Marshall went 55 yards with it, eluding every single person on the Vikings team, if not once, maybe twice. Probably a 55-yard touchdown that covered about 130 yards. People just went, wow. Forget the big red S. Superman wears a 2-8 on his chest. Number 28. Check him out. Marshall, contrary to what you believe, man,
The running game, man. Sometimes you have to pass the ball, man. You have to pass the ball. And that's what I say they're going to do in this game. They're going to pass the ball. And he looks at him and he shakes his head like, clue what you're talking about. Marshall Falk single-handedly won me about $1,000 in fantasy football one year. Do you remember all the old hens we used to work with at the Eagle back in Dallas? It was me against the hens in the final game. That's what they were called, the vodka hens. And Marshall Falk goes off for about 175 yards in the last game. I win by three points. Listen, here's the thing. There was a time in fantasy football where if you had Marshall Falk, You were going to win your season. That's it. Because he caught the ball, he scored touchdowns, and he ran for about a jillion yards. It was incredible. Absolutely. Greatest show on turf. So I don't know if you have heard about the SpongeBob SquarePants story, but apparently SpongeBob SquarePants, they've recently done a study that says it is causing kids.
to have ADD. Now, I'm lucky. I've not had to live through SpongeBob SquarePants. It's the best. Never seen it. My kids don't watch it. Oh, they will. No, man, they watch the Wiggles and they're into Thomas the Train and the big player in the house is, of course, Yo Gabba Gabba. But they're saying that SpongeBob does cause kids to have a little ADD. Really? I don't know, man. I used to watch it in college. You did? Yeah, but you were high on marijuana cigarettes. Not always. Mushrooms. No, sometimes it was a tobacco pipe. Also hashish. Yes. A lot of hashish. A little resin in there if you were running low. Paperclip bit. Yes. We've all been there. Well, not all of us, I guess, but you know.
Maybe not you. No, not me. You're drinking fifths of Captain Morgan. That is a true story. It really, it helped my attention though. It did? Yeah. Absolutely. Our deal now with Jake is Barry, which didn't, Jay or, you had Barry. I had a little bear named Barry. I still have a little bear named Barry. I have Georgie. You have Georgie. I have Georgie, a little green rabbit with red ears, wearing a sleeve or the pants leg of the pajamas that I was wearing. What are pajamas? Now, let me ask you, is this the actual thing from your youth? Oh, yeah. He's my Georgie. He's my rabbit. My mom, I decided that he needed pajamas to match mine. What are pajamas? So I cut the leg off and cut little arm holes and walked into my parents' bedroom. I'm like, look, Georgie has pajamas on. There you go. It's perfect. I am not the saver of the blankie, the thing. I like girls. I don't know when we're going to take Barry away from Jake. Never take it away. Yeah, don't take it away. You don't?
No, you don't take, maybe, like, put it somewhere. Like, if my parents took away Snugs, I wouldn't have Snugs now. And that's something that, like, I'll put that in my scrapbook. I'll maybe give it to my baby. Snugs? Snugs. I haven't talked about Snugs before? No. Year and a half in. Snugs? That's first date material, LLB. Snugs. Snugs is in a safe place. Snugs doesn't come out. I'm afraid that Snugs is going to get ruined. What the hell is Snugs? Snugs is my little blankie I had when I was little. You still have it? It's normal. Yeah. It's not like I sleep with it or anything. Don't. Sometimes Matt's not there. Maybe I do. Maybe he doesn't even know about Snugs. Maybe Snugs is in safe hiding. Are you a serial killer?
Maybe when I cry and watch romantic comedies alone, Snugs comes out to play. Wow. Maybe. Do you wash Snugs? No. No. I'm scared to wash Snugs. I did wash Snugs once in college, and it did some damage. So if I do it again, it'll have to be a hand wash. How old were you when you got Snugs? Like four, I think. You've had snugs 26 years. Washed once. Washed. Well, I'm sure my mom washed it when I was younger. You never have to take those away from the kids. They eventually just don't want them anymore. Like Jasper has turtle and dog. And they just are slowly making their way out of the bed and up onto the shelf. Matt doesn't know about snugs. I don't think Matt knows about it because I don't have snugs on display anymore. Snugs went off display when I was about 10. But I used to keep Snugs out on my bureau. And I would line up all the stuffed animals on Snugs. We can't be the only ones that know about Snugs. Does mom and dad know that you still have Snugs? I think they would probably assume that I do. Our parents have five kids. They probably forget Snugs' name. Question. Yes. What would happen, okay, if there were, God forbid, a fire, is Snugs...
One of the things that's coming out of the house. Snugs is next. I keep all my printed out pictures in a box. I keep all my diaries in a box. Snugs, everything is all in one spot. That's the fire spot. I would kill. Can we start bidding for those diaries? Can we? Can we start bidding? Can you imagine? I want them. I want them. Can we please get a photograph of Snugs? I'll beg you. Can we please? Get a photograph. A photograph of Snuggs. I don't know if Snuggs has ever been photographed before. He'll be fine. He might be shy. Is it he? Is it she? I always assumed it was he. It was less creepy when I cuddled with him that way. If it wasn't a female blanket. Wow. Year and a half. Yep. First time Snuggs. Boxes of diaries. I looked at one of the diaries recently. I called my sister a fart face shoelace. A fart face shoelace. Wow. I'm in for $100. I'm in for $100. Question. And you may not remember. Yeah. But do you recall what facilitated you calling her a fart face shoelace? You know. What did she do? Well, I think I saw an after school special or some sort of movie. I was trying to set my sister up.
Because I wanted to prove that she was reading my diary. And so one day I called her a fart face shoelace in the diary. And I wanted her to punch me and say, stop calling me a fart face shoelace. And that was what I came up with. So I wanted her to be like, call me a fart face shoelace. And I thought that I would be like, how did you know? You must have read my diary. And she never did. She didn't. So then the next day I wrote that I bought her a present. And I was like, she's going to love it so much with all these O's. She's lying to her diary. Yeah. She's lying to her diary. Diary lies. Diary lies. I was like, I'll write tomorrow what it is. On the next Diary Lies, Lauren lies about a present for Carly. Then calls her a fart-faced shoelace. She's insane. I thought this stress would kill her. So I thought she'd be like, what is it? What is it? And then I'd be like, aha. Right. It would eventually get to the point where Carly was sitting there. She's like wrapping her fingers and she's like, I can't take it anymore. What is it? What did you get me? What did you get? I can't take it. What'd you get me? Meanwhile, I'm eight. She's in middle school. She could care less what the heck is in my stupid diary. Oh my gosh. You ever have a journal? Journal. If you're a guy. Journal. My dad.
My dad, we went to London for a family trip. And he hands us at the airport. He hands me at the airport. By the way, I brought you and your brother these journals. And I want you to write them every day. Every day we're on the trip. I'm like... You got to be freaking kidding me, man. I don't want to do this. I'm sorry, bro. I'm telling you, I believe in journals a billion percent. I do, too. I really think they're a good idea. I don't want to shove down my throat. No, I agree. I would have liked to get into that journaling process on my own, not at the airport, in the terminal. Hey, you're going to write in this journal every day of this trip. I think they still have them. They're the best for a parent. As a parent, they're the best when your kid has a journal. You're a monster. Oh, you can know everything that way. Have you snooped in their journal? Oh, 100%. That's why I stopped when I was 16. You leave it out, I'm going to read. Everything in my house is open for investigation. You leave it out under your mattress. Hey, where he's creeping around.
I'm upset that he's read their diaries. You're not going to tell me and you're going to write it down. Dude, it's their personal property thoughts. What have you found? That's so wrong. It's so right. It's wrong. It is. I found out many things. That's why sleepovers stopped happening completely because they weren't really sleeping when they said they were sleeping. You are so rude. Hey. You can't read your kid's diary. As a parent, you use every single thing you can to be a good parent. That's what my dad said. He said, if it's under my roof, it's my property. You wouldn't know anything about it, crap dad. Yeah, crap dad. You wouldn't know a damn thing. But you can never let on that you know that that's how you got the information. You're like, hey, I was thinking. And you had to bring it up a sly way. Oh, my dad was not sly. Hello, this is Jason R. Isbell for losing your kid's trust. For only $10,000. They never knew. For only $10,000 for one day, I'll teach you how to read your kid's freaking diary. And then slipping into conversation like, I never even know how to read it.
I don't even know what I know. I was a mess until I discovered Jay's how to lose your kids class. I found bags of weed under my kids desk. Now, the best part is I keep the weed. He's none the wiser. Thanks, Jay. Winning. Here's the thing. My daughter was a pain in the ass. We would fight and fight and fight. Then I took Jay's class and now we don't speak anymore. Holy cow. My house, my rules, Mike. Word. Hey, Kim. What's this word? I can't read it. I don't know what it is. I can read it. I just can't say it. Hey, Kim. Finn said he got an election when he woke up. What the hell does that mean? What does that mean? Amy Winehouse's dad went on Pierce Morgan tonight. We got that. CreateYourDesignOnline.com is our friend Jared. That guy's amazing. Does the most amazing.
graphic design you will ever, ever see. Business cards, posters, websites, anything you need. Let's make some noise in here with our live studio audience. Be a part of the Mikey Show now. Text up to 949mikey at gmail.com or call Mikey now, 570-1949. More coming up on FM 94.9. Hey, I want to tell you about getting all the speed that you need at a great price. It's called... AT&T Wired. It's really good. It's $14.95 a month. And here's how it works. $14.95 a month. It's a 12-year, one-year term guarantee. And so you're locked in for a year. For an entire year, you've got that guaranteed price. You pocket the extra money, and it works out really, really well. Now, it also includes the on-the-go access to the entire AT&T National Wi-Fi Network.
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I want Verizon 4G LTE speed, but I also want selection. And he goes, we've got a ton of advanced Verizon 4G LTE devices, like the new Droid Bionic by Motorola, the Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1, or the My54510L mobile hotspot that lets you connect up to five Wi-Fi-enabled devices. So I say, smartphones, tablets, and hotspots. Not bad, but in my head I'm thinking, is it the 10, the 5, touchdown! And then I say, Yeah, but is Verizon 4G LTE really that fast? And he says, yep, up to 10 times faster than 3G. Whoa. And now I'm going. They're going for two. Got it. Come to Verizon for the largest selection of 4G LTE devices and tear it up on the fastest, most advanced 4G network in America. Visit any Verizon store today, verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE, or call 1-800-256-4646. Verizon. Coverage details at verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE. Two of San Diego's favorites are back, football and Hondas. Honda production is at full speed, the cars are rolling in, and your Honda dealers of San Diego County are getting ready for a big fourth quarter. So if you've been waiting to drive a new Honda, your wait is over. All nine Honda dealers have a nice selection of models like Pilots, Accords, CRVs, and all new 2012 Civics. They've got plenty of cars and plenty of deals. To find a Honda dealer nearest you, visit SDHondaDealers.com today.
It's good to be back. September still means summer in Southern California. That means more time with friends, more fun, more parties, and nothing makes a get-together legendary like the smooth taste of Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila. Serve it at your next party as an ice-cold shot or enjoy a fantastic Cuervo Silver Margarita and experience a taste so smooth it shatters expectations. Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila. Stay smooth. Drink responsibly. Jose Cuervo Especial Tequila. 40% alcohol by volume. Copyright 2011. Imported and bottled by Free Blind. Norwalk, Connecticut. Hunter license from the trademark of Jose Cuervo Especial. This weekend, turn your party into a Red Hot party. Stock up on Frank's Red Hot sauce for all your faves. Like Frank's Red Hot Buffalo Chicken Dip. The hit of every party. Recipes at FranksRedHot.com. Yeah, this is the light. Mikey. Oh. All right. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I love watching human beings in their natural habitat. Woods. I have a fear of dentists. A fear, like when I go to the dentist, it's palpable. Lauren. I'm more apt to listen to a specialist than a general practitioner. And Jay. You guys don't make homemade ice cream? Say what? On FM 94.9. Let's make some noise in our live studio audience. Play Amy Winehouse's dad on Piers Morgan Tonight in just a minute.
I was telling Woodsy about this during the commercial break. I don't think there's any foul language. It is an oldie but a goodie. And one that I used to play on the Mikey show for years when I was in San Jose doing like nights. But it's a prank phone call. And it's a prank phone call to a Thai restaurant using all hip-hop bands to order the food. Dog. And one Tupac Shakur. Can you say again? Yeah, I'm going to hip hop and you don't start the middle of Broccoli B. Broccoli B? Yeah. The middle of Broccoli B? Okay, you got Broccoli B. And I want one other Big Daddy King, one other LL Cool J, and one other Snoop Dog Dogg and Tupac Shakur. And I want Ice Cube and my Ice T. Okay, you have Ice T? Yeah, we have Ice T. You have Ice T, yeah. I want Ice Cube. Can you speak slow down?
I don't understand. Oh, are you Taiwanese? No, no, Thai, Thai. You Thai? Yeah. I Thai too. You know how to speak Thai? Yeah, I speak Thai. Okay, well, I'm from the other Thai. I'm from the Southern Thai, and I want one other Booyah tribe, LL Cool J, and one other Big Daddy Kang, and the hip hop, and you're going to start a rhythm of broccoli beat. Okay? LL Cool J. You got my other Big Daddy Kane. Chris Cross that out. Chris Cross. Chris Cross that out. Nook Dog Dog. My other Snook Dog Dog. And Tupac Shakur. You know Shakur? Shakur? Yeah, Tupac. I want Tupac. Yeah. Shakur. Tupac of Shakur. Yeah, yeah. Tupac Shakur. And with flair by flair. You have two short? Two short ribs? Short ribs? Short ribs, yeah. Two short? You speak too fast. I don't understand. I speak slow, okay? Listen, listen to me. Okay, can you tell me your number? Okay, all right. This is a restaurant. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.
And I need Wu-Tang Clan. Can you speak English? Slow down, okay? Okay, I try to speak English. I try to speak English to you, okay? You know, you're Thai. You're my brother. Right? You're Thai? You're Taiwanese? No, no, Thailand. You're Thailand? Oh, my God. Slow down. Slow down, okay, okay. If you speak fast like Chinese, I don't understand. Okay, look, I try to speak as long as I can. You have to have this food. What kind of restaurant is this? You don't have Wu-Tang Clan? Wu-Tang Clan? Wu-Tang Clan and Snoop Dogg? No, we don't. And Broccoli Bee? You have Broccoli Bee and the Bang Bang Boogie and the rhythm of hip-hop and you don't stop. Bang Bang Boogie? Yeah. No, we don't have that. You don't have Bang Bang Boogie? Okay. Huh? It's one of the greatest prank phone calls. In the history of prank phone calls. Chinese places ever get pranked? It's a Thai place. Sorry. We used to get wrong numbers all the time when I was 14. And they always called right back. Hello? Hi, is this blah, blah, blah? No, it's not. Okay, thanks. Pick up. Hello? Hi, is this, you know, it was Young's. The place was called Young's. Is this Young's? Yes, it is.
Do you guys deliver? No, we don't, but we do pick up for you. All right, I'll do pick up. Can I get a... What kind of soup do you have? We have egg drop soup, and we also have sweet and salt. Okay, I'll take egg drop. What size do you want? Small. Okay, what else do you want? Do you have chicken fried rice? No chicken fried rye. We have barbecue fried rye. And we have pork fried rye. Take chicken. Okay. Now you need to pull up to the house and honk your home. My dad. You should call my dad right now. My dad thought that was the funniest thing he ever heard in his life. He talked about that at your 40th birthday party. To him, it was. The height. Nothing better than a phone bit, and I do them at least once a day. The Chinese place I called growing up would always say, that's it? After everything you got? No, no, there's more. I have fat fingers. Prank call my dad with that voice. Mr. Sposa, please? Mr. Sposa, please? Is this Mr. Sposa?
I'm sorry, I can't understand you. Can you repeat that slowly? May I please speak to Mr. Esparza, please? You want to speak to who? Mr. Esparza, please. Mr. Esparza? Yeah, I'm Mr. Esparza. Okay. My name is Young Fran Trang Trang, and I'm calling because I would like to offer you a special deal today, please. Are you interested in Tracer credit card? No. Okay. Would you like to get debit card with 2.4% financing? Okay. I'm on long distance with another party. I don't care. Well, I don't have to. No, no, no, dad. This is your son. Hello, dad? Every time. Every time. I used to do that to him constantly. That was like I was 14 years old again.
That was like I was 40. He used to hang up on me every time. I would go, Dad, it's me. It's me. Click. Oh, so great. Every time. I gotta tell my dad about this. This is really great news for Alzheimer's patients. Something that was just discovered. We'll tell you about it next. Make some noise in our live studio audience. Pop it in. And turn it on. Be a part of the Mikey Show now. Call 570-1949. Or text 949mikey at gmail.com. This is the Mikey Show. More coming up on FM 94.9. Chevron Extra Miles. Great selection of energy drinks. Allows me to stay on top of my game.
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Save thousands with 0% financing on seven of Toyota's most popular vehicles. Camry sales claim based on MotorIntelligence.com CY 2010 sales. Excludes hybrid models. Limited term financing through Toyota Financial Services to qualify Tier 1 plus through Tier 3 credit customers only. Vehicles must be purchased from 2011 new car dealers stocked by midnight 10-3-11. Sorry to be the one to have to tell you. Oh my God. Back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. He used the word wonderful. Again. I'm 40. It's okay. Woods. Your boy gets in the shower and I have very little hair and I have to condition, of course, because it smells so good and it feels so good when you condition. Lauren. When I have to say smart things on the spot, I'm like... And Jay. Please grow up on FM 94.9. Let's make some noise in our live studio audience. I was supposed to call Nita, our Hungarian nanny. She's going to tell us the phrase and we got to isolate it. Fat fingers. They're fat. It's funny because he's fat. All right, so the phrase is Hungarian, but it means little bunnies jump high, which means shy girls. They do it more. I wonder what's Hungarian for all women are prostitutes. Hello. Hi, Nita. Nita? Hello. Nita, can you hear me? Yes, I can hear you. Hi. Hi. Okay, so...
What is the Hungarian phrase for little bunnies jump high? That is so hard to understand. And she'll do that. There's no way I can say it. You can do it. I know you can do it. Okay, let me try. Okay. Go ahead. Yeah, it means like, you know, tricky, something small like this. Right. Bunny is the new sea. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Newsy. Yeah.
Okay, now say the whole phrase. Okay. Oh, I screwed up. I'm sorry. Okay, wait. Okay, wait. I'm going to have you say it again, and I'm going to be super quiet. Go ahead. Okay. You mean the whole phrase? Yes. Okay. That's a tricky one, huh? Little bunnies jump high. I hear Woodsy does a great job. That's right. Woods can do it. Hungarian classes or something. That's right. Woods is our honorary Hungarian. I creep around a lot of Hungarian websites. Because he's always hungry. You get it? He's hungry. He's hungry. All right, Nita. Thank you. Okay, you're welcome. Bye, guys. Bye. She's so sweet. She is. Angel. About your daughter's age, so. You know, Mike, that ain't fair, man. That ain't fair. It's like me bringing up God, you know? Are you trying to get me back or what? I'm sorry, Mike. Should I call you Poncho Pilot? I'm kidding. I'm kidding. You know I'm kidding, Mike. I gotta play this for you. The Ron Paul supporter. We got a guy that...
Writes us all the time. He really wants us to support Ron Paul and to understand Ron Paul. Please stop. I know. Please stop. This guy, now this is not the same person, but this is a video that I came across of a guy getting arrested who happens to be a Ron Paul supporter. Read your constitution. Okay. All right. Are you going to take control of me about this? No. Are you going to do any other tests I ask you to do? The constitution is your right. Don't. This is your last chance. Constitution, you guys took this. Constitution, I got it. Why can't you guys just assume to me that this is my constitution? I assume to you. Are you going to do any more tests I ask you to do? And you're not going to take the breath test right now, right? I will. Bad ideas. Okay, then you can stamp this, Deputy, real quick. I'll bring the little portable breath test over and we'll do it.
Okay, just stand right here. Their patience appears to have paid off. What's the First Amendment? What's the First Amendment? Stand right where you're at, okay? What's the First Amendment? You don't even know! It's a vow to your constitution, and you don't even know what it is. Okay, this is the breath tester, okay? I will gladly take that. Okay, I appreciate that. Let me explain it to you so you understand. This is a solid straw, okay? And just keep on. Yeah. That's fine. Do you know what the legal limit in Montana is? I was hurting nobody. I don't care what the legal limit in Montana is. What's the legal limit of hurting somebody? Okay, listen. It's .08, okay? Brian, can you read this for me? Yeah. What does it say? .3. .301. Yeah. Okay? That's over the .08, right? .301. Wow. Based on the tests that we've done, the ones that you've refused, and the observation we've made,
He's almost four times the legal limit. Constitution! Yeah, Constitution. Read it and live by it. Have a seat in the back of the car. Have a seat. Ron Paul 2012. Let's go. You can take it to a certain point and try to work with them. You're going to get some people that are... naturally combative maybe and those people may not change so much but when they've been there's something on board in their body that's changing the way they normally would act you don't know what direction is going to go so you just have to be prepared for it There's probably nothing more annoying than drunk cause institution guy. No. What's First Amendment? You don't even know. You idiot. First Amendment, I drink. You don't. Yeah. You know what the Second Amendment is? You don't know the first one. Second Amendment is you don't know the first one. First one. Third Amendment repeated what I said. Yeah. You know what Fourth Amendment is? You lose.
You're out of here. Is it Fifth Amendment or Crooked Sheriff? Yeah, Fifth Amendment. Oh, look what we got here. Crooked Sheriff. Freaking, freaking Crooked Sheriff. Hey, Mikey, Mikey, Mikey, Mikey, Mikey. Seriously? You see my friend? He saw you sitting on this bench wearing those stupid glasses. And he, dude, I'm not kidding you. He goes, you know what I'm saying? I go, what? He goes, Mikey. Mikey. Yes, Woods. He goes, he looks like a crooked sheriff. Perfect Woods throw. Identical Woods. Identical Woods. It's a true statement. Identical Woods. 20 minutes later. Did I tell you? Yeah, you told me. Cricket sheriff. You told me. Come here. You told me. I'm going to tell him to you because you're my pal, okay? I love you. Hey.
Don't tell anybody I told you this. He said he was like a crooked sheriff. I'm weird when I have a few too many. I go to Mikey and I go, your wife just said that she's so turned on watching you win at poker. She just said, God, that's sexy. Look at him ruling that table with all those chips. And he's like, really? I go, yeah. So he's like, babe. Did you say it was turning you on that I was playing poker? She goes, No. Why did you do that? Because I'm an idiot. And I go, Woods, why did you do that? He goes, I don't know. He's a matchmaker. I'm trying to hook you guys up, man. We're husband and wife. Dude. It's on. You get your foot in the door, man. Okay, sorry. Trying to help. Trying to spice up your marriage. I'm trying to...
Put a spark in there, dude. You know? Sue me. Sue me. Yeah, sue me for loving you. Hey, Mike. Did you get potato salad? What? Did you get potato salad? Did I get potato salad? That's what I said. Yes, I did. It was my birthday. Happy birthday. Hey, Mike. Mike. Very happy. Mike. How freaking good is that? Like, I made that, and I specifically was like, Mike likes... Babe, you didn't make that. We bought that at Vons. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Let me play my flute and ride my bike at the same time. You guys, time to go. Woods is riding his bike around playing my flute. Time to go. It's time to go. Party's over. It's parties. Woods. It's time to go to bed, bro. Time to go to bed, bro. He's putting a tip jar out. Yeah. What's he doing with that cobra? Hillary, what do you got coming up next? I just grabbed a bunch of songs that put me in a good mood like Givers and Foster the People and my favorite Clash song and Strokes.
And White Denim, one of our new recommended albums that I'm in love with. Garrett. Yeah. Garrett. And there's that. Garrett. There you go. Lovely and talented. Hillary is up next, and we'll see you tomorrow morning at 6 o'clock. Mikey shows out. Lincoln Financial Media Station. Sure, the corporate office has a say in what we do here. No beer drinking between the hours of 10 and 2. Carne asada fries only twice a week. And absolutely no European swimwear. FM 94.9. It's a... About the music.