The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 09/22/11

0:04Yeah. Seems like the week flew by. Yeah, it did. Weekend's already day after tomorrow, and it's Thursday, and here we are, ready to do our thing with you. It's the Mikey Show. Phone line's open, 570-1949, and text 949mikey at gmail.com, and you get a hold of us right now if you want to do it, and let's get this thing started. Don't forget, by the way, word of the day is plaster. We do a word of the day every day. And it's good for a cool prize. And so today the word of the day is plaster. When you hear it, Caller 9 will get a pair of tickets to see Bush, Filter, and Chevelle at 4th and B, which is a 21 and up show. So you've got to be ready for it. M1s are encouraged to call at this time about anything you want. If you're an M1, you're a Mikey Show listener, you listen to the Mikey Show exclusively. When you call in, you turn your radio down, get to the point, you don't cuss. That's what being an M1 is.

1:09And M1 Nation is growing all the time. You know, I've never really said this, but the Mikey Show listeners used to be called P1s. And I encourage P1s because there are a lot of P1s that are now becoming M1s. And I love that. See, I've never said this before. I was driving home yesterday and I thought of the P1 Army as like I had ownership of it. And then when I left, they were like, oh, you can't say that. And so then I had to come up with M1, which is a big thing. But what bothers me is that I still want everybody that listened. And I mean every last one of them. I don't want two to be left. That's two too many. And so I want every single one of you guys. I want M1 Nation to absorb all of the former P1 Army. And I want us to take over the world. That's just my feeling on it. So if you are a former P1, stick an M over the P and let's get going. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show. I'm 41 years old. Woodsy is 36. He's our sports guy and a Yankee fan. The girl to my right that's freezing down to her bones is Lauren O'Brien, otherwise known as L.O.B.

2:34They just turned the air conditioner down. They have it at about 50 degrees there. It's true. You can see my breath. I have icicles on the end of my nose. Yes. But it is warming up. They have warmed it up by quite a bit. Hopefully it doesn't get too hot. But Jay is our producer, and he's 48 years old, and he's the man separated by glass. Thankfully. For us. Yes. And then our phone screener is Chris. It's Chris. That's Crow. So Mikey Thon is officially 14 days and 54 minutes away. Whoa. Whoa. 14 days and 54 minutes, which basically means it's 14 days away. It's exactly. Two weeks from right now. Wow. At this very second. How did that happen? I don't know. I don't know how it happened, LLB. It snuck up. It was like, hi. It did that. I'm like, hello. I know. You pulled a Garrett on me. He walked in. He goes, hey, Mike. Oh, my gosh. Good morning. Garrett, our program director, stealthily snuck into the studio yesterday right behind me.

4:06Hey, Mike! Hey, Mike! I got the new Switchfoot for you. Take a listen. Oh, my gosh. And that's what this Mikeethon feels like. It's exactly two weeks. Garrett! And in two weeks, we better have been well-rested. Oh, boy. Yes. Most importantly. Because we will be awake for 28 straight hours. Well, you and Woods are all set then. Well-rested. We got it. I never knew being fat and lazy was so rewarding. Oh, yeah, I got new stuff, guys. So he's got new toys. I got some new toys in my arsenal. Oh, man. Want to know why? In my arsenal. I put some new stuff in my holster. You want to know why? Because y'all love to make fun of how I mess up words, don't you? Don't you just love to play drop soul, Uncle Jay? Whatever you think you know about this man is a reveler. Oh, yeah.

5:08I mess up words. I get it. Video game for the Nintendo. You're looking kind of fat. Look at these arms. Fat, fat, fat. That's fat. You see, Mike, there's a little old something we like to say back in Texas called two can play at that games. Two can dance that game. It's like the gunfight at the OK Corral. Oh, yeah. You can load them up, Mike. But all I know is every time you play yourself one of them little old J-drops, I'm going to have to play myself something, too. Something real good. Go ahead, Mike. Why don't you play how I say Don Knotts? 70s Tim Conway Don Knotts flick. Watch it. Take that, Debbie. See, Mike, I've gone and just made everything you do relevant.

6:10I guess it's Irreverent. It's funny. He's funny. You're funny. He's funny. Who is that, Mike? Taylor Swift? It's not like it's Taylor Swift. I'm sorry. I mean, how often? I mean, oh man, nobody thinks that's funny? It's called war, Mike. We're engaged. It's called tit for tat, Mike. You know the old game of tit for tat. We're gonna play it. Aren't we? I'm scared to see how he plays that. Yeah, ditto. Let's do it. That's awesome. Jay came in this morning, and he showed me where I can find those little sound bites of him. Mike, they're a little hard to get to. You just got to page over two pages. Now, I know that it ain't easy to get over two pages. I know you even bought a special freaking wand.

7:13Just so you could turn pages on your computer screen. I know that. Then you broke the wand with a fat hand. Yeah. Your dialing wand was rendered useless by your big chubby, your big chubby hot dog sized fingers. Gosh darn, man. I see you in there typing. Looks like Nathan's hot dogs. Just dancing on a keyboard. Dancing on a keyboard. Disgusting. Hot dogs anymore? Seriously, turkey dogs. I don't eat hot dogs. Can't even look at rolls. Rolls. Woodsy, how close are we to being able to watch the San Diego Chargers play football on television? Well, as of yesterday, we were 4,000 seats away. Okay. And I do not have an update on how close we are today. Perfect. However, because I haven't been given one.

8:18I would say that, you know, it's a good possibility that we're blacked out on Sunday. I hope that we sold a lot of tickets yesterday. As do I, my friend. As do I. I don't want this. Yeah, I do not want this. I want to watch. Yeah. I want to watch games. I've got an appearance at U31 on Sunday to watch the game. And if it's blacked out, I'm going to look kind of like an idiot. You just sit there and watch other games. Blank TV. Yeah. They got 20 screens. They got every game. I'll have to watch another game. What do we know about this game this weekend? Well, we do know that it's at 105 p.m. It's at Qualcomm. It's on Sunday. And we do know that the Chargers have made a couple roster moves. They have put Jonas Mouton, who was their rookie linebacker from Michigan. Put him on injured reserve. He's done for the year. And he hurt his shoulder in the last game against the Niners, the preseason game. And they have signed an old Charger favorite, Paul Oliver, to play safety. He's back. He's back. 5'10", 210 pounds. He was on the roster for three seasons. Played 44 games from 08 to 2010. It's a name that we know well around San Diego.

9:24Yeah, so you were asking me this morning, why would they sign another safety? And I think it's just a depth move. They need depth at that position. And also, this is interesting news, we're not sure if Malcolm Floyd is going to play on Sunday. We don't think he will. But Patrick Creighton is ready to go. He's been taking reps with the first team, so he's ready to rock. He's a good player. He stepped up and played great for us last year. So this will be his first action this year. I'm reading that the game is blacked out, but it's from a blog. I don't know that it's necessarily true. It's a possible blackout, they were saying a day ago. Who knows? Maybe they sold more tickets. I think the deadline is today, though. Thursday at 1 p.m., I believe. Yes. So we've got a few hours to get this game on. Oh, come on, guys. I mean, I'm not going to go, but you should. Do as I do. Do as you say. Do as I say, not as I do. I don't want to go, but you should go. I can't go, but... Or else I would, as far as you know. You should go out there and buy some tickets, man. I want to see the game. Go watch it. It's fun. I don't want any part of that. I'm not going to do it. I never would, but you should. So go. Come on. Now get. Now get. Let's see. So last night was a big night in TV. First night of The X Factor on TV.

10:48This is what the theme sounds like. I was kind of interested. What is that all about? Did anybody see it, by the way? Call us. 570-1949. Does that sound 80s retro to you? Yes. Maybe that's what they're going for. And then here's the X Factor Sting. So you'll hear that a lot. It's kind of the equivalent of the American Idol. Do we know who the host is? What's that? Do we know who the host is? I don't know the guy. I mean, I don't think we know him. He's just a guy that they hired to do it. So here's what I have in You Tell Me. Ribbon in the Sky. These are the songs. Give It to Me Baby. Forget You by the chubby guy from The Voice, the black dude. Unchained Melody. You Only Live Once. That's a good one. That's The Strokes, I think. We could try that one. You want to hear that one? Yeah. All right, let's see. Teenage Screamers, You Only Live Once. And your names are...

12:07We're called You Only Live Once. Oh. How old are you both? I'm 15. What's the name of their band? I'm 19. Okay. Good luck to you. Okay. Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. Ribbon in the Sky is Stevie Wonder. Yes, that's true. I love it. I got some more. Let me read a couple more. You tell me. Natural Woman. We may go back to that one. Ribbon in the Sky. I'm a stud. I wish. Rolling in the Deep. We all know. Emotions. Oh, wow. That's pretty. What's that? It's lofty. It's Mariah Carey. Yeah. Oh. A lot of range in that song. Like a Virgin and Young Homie. Oh, got to hear Young Homie. Do you know it? No. I don't either. Let's hear it. This is good. We're all bobbing our heads. Yeah.

13:26They never thought I'd make it this far. Look now, here we are. Now, who is L.A. Reid? He's a music producer, isn't he? Yeah. Big time, though, right? Yeah, big guy. I mean, big time music producer. Yeah. Now, this is going to kind of sound cool to me, to hear those old judges, you know, to hear Pauler, who seems very lucid. Doesn't seem all whacked out. Yet. Seems like she's got her stuff together. Yet. Seems like she's got her stuff together, though. So, Paula and Simon. Now L.A. Reid and some broad I don't know who she is. The girl from Pussycat Dolls. There you go. Very foxy. Very foxy. Let me tell you something. What did you write? Little homie, what you tripping on? Yeah. Yeah, honey, I'm tripping on you. Yes, I did. Thank you, girl. Thank you. Thank you. What about you? Like, I can't even describe your talent. What about you, Randy guy? People I say, what's the X factor? I say it's indescribable. So I guess you got the X factor. What about you, Identical Randy? Yeah, what about you? How about you, Paula? What's in your purse, girl? Let's have some fun. I got a bathroom in your purse with my name written all over it. How about you, Baby Gap shirts? Talking to you, Simon. Let's talk about it. They're doing something different.

14:53As they critique, they're playing music. Brand new. American Idol does not do that. As they critique, they're silent. You just hear them doing it. Now, I think it's brilliant. It pulls on your heart strings. Just playing with your emotions. Yes. So as they start to tell someone how great they are and that person starts to cry, the music swells. I think this show is going to be a gigantic hit. Crowd cheering. You are a bright light. You lit us all up. You are so talented. Words can't articulate. I'm watching this show. That's all I can say. I don't give a crap if I'm homosexual and you think I'm gay because, fine. Listen, I can be out about it if I was in the army, but I'm not. But I will tell you I'm going to watch this. They would be proud of me today to tell you that you are the truth. Wow, Ellie Reed says you are the truth. Wow, that's a big compliment.

15:53I think it was an a-hole. I think it was freaking terrible. I don't know why they're making such a fuss. Everything that they've just said, the swelling music, all of it, rubbish. Sorry to put a pin in your balloon. You're another black guy that works at Starbucks serving me an espresso. It's making me sick to look at you. Always my favorite feeling in the world is when I sit... In this chair. That's organ-like. It's cold play. It is? Let's fix you. And I meet a star for the first time. Yep. Oh, my gosh. I just got chills. Yeah. I just freaking got chills. And there's something about you. And what I like about the fact is that maybe you need the show, maybe we need you. It's emotional terrorism already. It's emotional terror. Dude.

16:51Nah, look at you. Mexican goose bumps. I got goose bumps. This is regular goose bumps. Let me tell you. They're just regular. I love stuff that makes you feel good. And I think America freaking loves it. They want it like a drug. Absolutely. They want to feel good. You love to feel good about people. You love it. You ever see Extreme Home Makeover? I've never seen it, but I've heard that it's emotional terrorism. I've always heard that. I've always heard that Extreme Home Makeover, you watch it and you will be... And in the fetal position. You can't not cry. Yes. It's great. Woods is almost tearing up thinking about it. 100% of the time when they take the family away and they bring them back to their home and you see their reaction, the kids, the parents that are down on their luck, you're done. No matter what their reaction is. Right. Whether or not they get emotional or they're just excited, you're like, oh my God. Oh my God. You add music. You add the right music. I want to know who thought of it.

17:56I want to know who said, you know what we've got to do in post? We've got to add swelling music. And it's got to be the right thing. Like, well, I don't care what it costs to get the rights to that freaking Coldplay song that they played in the King Kong commercial. You know the one I'm talking about with the lights and everything. It's called Fix You. Fix You, right. We play that, you know. I bet it was Simon. I'm sure. And then as we're critiquing them and we say something special, we swell the music. Man. People will absolutely... We're going to have to sell Depends to people. Yeah. Because they're going to soil themselves. Always my favourite feeling in the world is when I sit in this chair and I meet a star for the first time. And there's something about you. And what I like about the fact is that maybe you need the show, maybe we need you. Let's go for a vote. Fergie screen? Yeah. You know what, Chris? I'm going to give you a yes, but man, you got to stay straight. First of all, maybe the most insulting thing anyone's ever said to me today. How dare you, LA? Especially today. Right. Okay. Today is the day that my brother, who happens to be in the Air Force, was allowed to do his thing. Okay. So he wore a shirt that said, hi, I'm in the Air Force. My name is Esteban.

19:45I'm a gay man and I don't have to hide it anymore because today is the day that they repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell. And that was on a t-shirt. All of it. It was hard to get on there. He's a big boy. On this day that he got to wear the shirt that says, Hi, my name is Esteban. I'm in the Air Force and I'm homosexual and Don't Ask, Don't Tell has been repealed. How dare you on that day say to me, I must stay straight. That's not what I meant, dog. You silly sausage. What do you care? Actually, I just meant straight and narrow. I wasn't talking about your sexual orientation. I sure felt that way, L.A. Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. L.A. L.A. L.A. L.A. L.A. L.A. L.A. L.A. L.A. I'm so freaking sorry. I thought it was my bad and thank you. Rewind. Rewind it. I will. Straight and narrow the whole thing. And when I call you, I don't want to talk to your assistant. I don't want to talk to the... You better pick up the phone and let me hear your voice so I know that you're okay. I will always. I will always be right here. My man. Right here.

21:04Chris, we have a deal here, right? That if we're going to put you through, for you, your son, we're staying on the right track, yeah? Yeah, must be. There's no breaking that. No more crack. No more. Then you got my yes. Chris, I want you to listen, and I want you to listen good. Yeah, what's up? We might do this for you, but... We've had to go to the CEO of Fox. Yo, man, this sounds too familiar to me. We've had to go to the CEO of Fox to sign off. This sounds familiar. On you even being on this program. This sounds familiar. So don't get into any trouble like two weeks into the competition. Fair enough. Does that sound all right? Does that mean arrests? There's media watching, okay? You mean arrests? It's not just arrests here. We're talking about... Even an article? Even if an article is written about you. Especially. Especially an article. Keep your nose clean. Fair enough. Literally. M1 Rebel from Oceanside. Hey, Mikey. How's it going? Good. Well, since I taped on the M Factor yesterday, I thought I'd watch the X Factor and get a few tips. And I've got to tell you, their little homie.

22:20Yeah, he's going to tug on your heartstrings. It's a true story. He's a recovering addict. He's been clean for a couple months. He's got a little boy. And, man, the dude's pretty talented. That's awesome. I love it. Did it get you? Oh, dude, I had some tears in my eyes. Oh, yeah. I guarantee you. Huge hit. Hey, we will call you back. We will call you back. Yeah. If we call you, you better be available. You better answer. You better pick. Don't give me your daughter's phone number. Hey, thanks for the call is what I meant to say. The Mikey Show. 570-1949. Or text them. 949mikey at gmail.com. More coming up on FM 94.9. Octoberfest is a celebration of the harvest. It turns into one of the biggest celebrations of the year as millions flock to Munich. Since Munich is halfway around the world, join FM 94.9 and Beck's Beer at Rocktoberfest. October 22nd, 30th and University in North Park. Celebrate your harvest or new job or oil change. Check out live music from Everest. The soft path, the style tone, and more.

23:43Fill up on all kinds of German food and wash it down with a German beer like Beck's Oktoberfest, a classic German beer that's amber in color with hints of caramel and toasted nut. It's only available from now through October. There's hundreds of Oktoberfests, but only one Rocktoberfest. So join the party October 22nd in North Park and celebrate every day with Beck's Oktoberfest, available for a limited time. For Rocktoberfest tickets or details, go to fm949sd.com. Again, it's your old pal Woodsy for Dave and Buster's, one of my favorite places in San Diego. One of the best nights I've had since I joined the Mikey Show was at Dave and Buster's when we went for our wipeout viewing party. It was absolutely incredible. And you could see if you came to that, which about 500 of you did, you could see how Dave and Buster's does things, man. First class all the way. Great food, great drinks. How much fun is that place to go in and be able to play games? You know what else? I mean, listen, we're going to be watching football there on Monday nights, okay? So my first appearance here is this Monday, September 26th. It's the Redskins against the Cowboys. Great rivalry. It's going to be a great game. And I'm going to be there. I've got prizes to give away. I've got all kinds of stuff. So Dave & Buster's is the best place to watch football, play games, have some delicious food, drink specials. Everything you need is there. It's 430 to 630 on Monday night, and it's at 2931.

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27:26the Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1, or the MiFi 4510L mobile hotspot that lets you connect up to five Wi-Fi-enabled devices. So I say, smartphones, tablets, and hotspots. Not bad, but in my head I'm thinking... Is that the 10? The 5? Touchdown! And then I say, yeah, but is Verizon 4G LTE really that fast? And he says, yep, up to 10 times faster than 3G. Whoa. And now I'm going... They're going for two. Got it. Come to Verizon for the largest selection of 4G LTE devices and tear it up on the fastest, most advanced 4G network in America. Visit any Verizon store today, verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE, or call 1-800-256-4646. Verizon. Coverage details at verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE. Mom, I want to be a pilot. Is it tough? It's not easy. You could do it. Study hard, go to a good school, never skip your math homework. Piece of cake. Oh, yeah? But can you finish those carrots for your pilot's vision? Eh, I'd rather do my math homework. Thought so.

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30:55This report brought to you by MINI. The MINI Cooper Hard Topic gets 37 miles per gallon. That's 37 miles per gallon. 37 commute changing, rarely having to fill your tank miles per gallon. Visit MINI of SDCounty.com for details. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Like 60 of those rings are on her neck. And just boobs hanging out. Lauren. You know what I think the scariest thing is about clowns? They don't say anything. Yeah, that's great. Even though they can talk. And Jay. Just a man trying to do the right thing. On FM 94.9. I haven't said the word of the day yet, but you've got to be listening for it. Because when I do, call her nine. I'm going to give you a Bush, Filter, and Chevelle ticket. So stick around. Also, you guys know who Amy Schumer is, right? Amy Schumer is a comedian. I don't know whether to say comedian or comedian. Comedian. What do you prefer, L-O-B? Comedian. Comedian. I love that. She's a comedian. And she made a joke about Ryan Dunn. And she's taking some meat. Ryan Dunn, of course, the guy that lost his life in a terrible car crash.

32:50And she made a joke at the celebrity roast for Charlie Sheen. And she's taking some heat about it. And I didn't know Steve-O was on the roast. Steve-O was on the roast too. Obviously offended Steve-O. Didn't know. Probably wouldn't have asked him about it. But he was on yesterday. And he is appearing this weekend in Ramona. But she says she was making fun of Steve-O. And so we'll tell you all about it in a little bit. Don't go anywhere. We'll fill you in on what's going on with that. Don't know if you've heard the news. We started the show with an REM song. This one goes out to the one I love. And there's reason for it. The reason is they have broken up. I didn't actually know that they were. Officially still making records and all of that. I didn't know. But they've broken up. I like them. I like them. Sad day in music. 30 years together. 30 years. 30 years. Why break up? Why stay together? Why not just disappear into obscurity? I think they want to do other stuff. Go ahead. And maybe their fans are like...

34:13So what's the deal? Are you putting something out or what? And they were finally like, we've been broken up for two years and nobody knows. 12 years. Nobody knows because we haven't put anything out. We might as well just say, hey, listen, we're not doing anything anymore. They've been putting out records. They put out a record last year that was really well received. And, you know, sometimes things run their course. Yeah. It says, to our fans and friends as REM and as lifelong friends and co-conspirators. We have decided to call it a day as a band. We walk away with a great sense of gratitude, of finality, and of astonishment at all that we've accomplished. To anyone who ever felt touched by our music, our deepest thanks for listening. I have. I definitely felt touched by their music. Is your favorite song losing my religion? No. No. I know why they did it. What? Why? So when they reform... To tour, it'll be all this excitement. Conspiracy. Jay, they've got more dough than you could ever imagine. Do you ever have enough dough? Yes. Really? They do. Never have enough. Mo money, mo problem. You think they sat around a room and they go, hey, listen. Yeah. I'm tapped. Michael, we should probably break up and then let's get back together in two years. Listen to this. Michael Stipe goes, well, here, let me let Michael Stipe read it.

35:39This is what he had to say about that breakup. During our last tour and while making Collapse Into Now and putting together this greatest hits retrospective, we started asking ourselves, what's next? Working through our music and memories over three decades was a hell of a journey. We realized these songs seem to draw a natural line under the last 31 years of our working together. Identical Michael. Identical Michael. Now, this one goes out to what I love. I've never heard Michael Stipe before. Woodsy said, though, last night he did Michael Stipe for his wife, Jamie. And she said it was identical Michael Stipe. More the singing than speaking. Yeah. So there you go. It's all done. And they're not going to make any more records. Collapse into Now was the last record? News to me. Well, what's next? That's it. Well, bye-bye, R.E.M. We loved you. Yeah. We loved you, and we're sad to see you go. We liked you. Yeah. We loved you. I loved you at one point. I loved you for 1988. I loved you. I've been putting your songs on shuffle the past couple years, not really caring if you were together or broken up. Yeah. Yeah, I loved you at 88, and then like L.O.B. said, after 88, you came up on shuffle, and I was like, hey, I remember you. Yeah. And that's about it. Orange Crush. Good song.

37:06Cool. Sometimes we would just hit the next button. Sometimes. We'd hit the forward button to see what was next. Jay has been writing parody songs about the Mikey show. It's been his thing. Don't hate me, LLB. First he wrote Crap Dad about me. Yep. And then he wrote Every Bite You Take about Woods. Which my wife loved thoroughly. Yes. She did. Thoroughly. Enjoyed it. Couldn't get out of her car. And now apparently he's written a song about L.O.B. that is called Always a Single Lady. Always a single lady, been a single lady. Non-committed lady, drying up lady. Single, single lady, single, single lady. Now pull your pants up, what's the hubbub? Get knocked up, you're giving it away for free. You got birth and hips. Don't ho-ho, don't you ho-ho. Don't ho-ho, no, no, no, don't.

38:33Ho, ho, don't you ho, ho. Don't ho, ho, don't you know. Cause if he liked it, then he should have fertilized it. Cause if he liked it, then he should have fertilized it. Don't be mad if he didn't fertilize it. A ring and he can get up on it. Ho, ho, ho. Don't you ho, ho. Don't you ho, ho. No, no, no. Don't you ho, ho. Don't you ho, ho. Ho, ho, ho, ho. It's always in one key. The key never changes. Key of excellence. There is never a chord change. Never a chord change. I'd say I got off easy. No pun intended. Words just smash together? Yes. You have to. Outstanding. It's pretty good. He keeps raising the bar. I mean, what's he going to do next? His parody songs thrill me. They thrill me. And the turnaround time, by the way? I know.

39:3716 hours? Maybe? Maybe. Maybe? He goes, well, if I had a parody song about L.O.B., and I go, okay. All right. The next day, he's like, oh, by the way, there's the L.O.B. parody. Yeah. I'm like, you did it already? It's done. My guess is he takes great delight in it, so it doesn't even feel like work. No. Yeah. It just spews out. Yeah, Mike, that's what it's like when you work. I already had them written. It's poetry. It's poetry that I do in my spare time. I just put it to music. Put beats to it. This is what he did yesterday. This was a song about what? Every bite you take. Every ankle injury you fake. Smooth. Yep. Every chair you break. Every donut you take. Mike is watching you. Guy barracks a chair one time. One time. Every lazy day. Fair enough. On every couch you lay. Every couch you pass. Right. Yes. All your chins will stay. With your fat you play. Mikey's watching you. Did you bat him on that word? Did he throw an emphasis? Oh, you cost me. This is what the whole song's about. Fifty grand you see. This is why he wrote the parody song. How my bank book aches. Money was spent, one. With every donut you ate. Justin's College.

40:59Every bite you take. It's a new F-150, buddy. Every dip you contemplate. Every smoker's break. Every blame you escape. Mikey's watching you. Here we go. It's so long that my wiener you want to trace. I dream at night you and Chaz have the same face. Your boobs are bigger and a braw keeps them in place. Your nip's so cold, Mikey wants him in his face. I keep crying, woozy, woozy, no. I will say he gave that song more of himself than any of them. More gusto than all of them. Because that one, he's really hurt. Yes, he's his actual hurt. He's like, listen, bud, you know, first of all, we ain't never going to be friends again. No. Co-workers. Co-workers. Now, we were friends. We're good friends. We're good friends. Black brothers. Yeah. But we went on ABC's Wipeout together, and a couple of dummies, they lost. They broke, one of them broke their hip or something. Broke his arm. And it couldn't compete. So what happened next? They call us. They say, you're backing the money.

42:18You know, I told my wife, Kim, I said, Kim, get ready. We're going on our first vacation ever. We're going on our first vacation in a hotel, not camping. That's every vacation for us camping because I don't have to pay for nothing. I build it. I build a place that we stay. All right. Nature's free. Take a bath, poop outside. You don't have to pay for it. Perfect. But now I was actually going to be able to stay in a hotel because they called us back to wipeout. All wood. All you had to do, Wood, is finish the damn course. Finish. You would have won. Finish. We would have won. Finish. Do you realize that fat midget across from you could have finished that damn course? I could have. Don't think I haven't told Kim. Oh, she knows. I said, Kim, I know Mike. Sorry, when I think about Mike, I get sick. I have a feeling even Mike. I think even Mike could have finished. Couldn't wait to get that parody out. I mean, that probably took him five minutes. They've all been very easy to do. Very easy to do. It's almost like I would like to try to write one about him, but I can't because it's going to be nowhere near the same. No one will like it. Nobody will like it. They all love him. Oh, yeah. There can't be parodies anymore. I mean, the guy is just, you know. Locked it down. He's locked it down. Yeah. He's at the top of his game right now. Mm-hmm. Oh, listen to this. Woodsy says that.

43:47He was all set to fry up some pork chops last night. Yeah. Make some mac and cheese. And then he realized that you didn't have milk or eggs. Yep. Now, milk I understand because you need that for the mac and cheese. Was it the powdered kind in the box? Yeah, Kraft. You don't need eggs for that, right? Nope. You need eggs to fry the... What you do is you crack an egg, you whisk it up, then you take the pork chop, you dip it in there, then you roll it in the flour and pepper mix, and then you... fry them up. Never done it that way. It's the best way to do it. See, I always use, for me, the pork chops always, and so it's got enough to put it in the flour, because it's, you know, right out of the case, it's plenty moist. Yes, yes, but it tends to, in my professional pork chop frying expertise, it tends to flake off a little bit. With the egg, it doesn't flake. It's unbelievable. Try it with the egg next time. I'm gonna. It's really good. No, I'm gonna.

44:50Anyway, he says he didn't have milk, he didn't have eggs, so he decided to take a recommendation from M1 Cave Dweller from Wisconsin and try the new Wendy's burger. Don't blame Cave Dweller. It was his fault. He put it in my head. And he has to say it's freaking dumb. Wait till you try it. What is it? I don't like burgers, though. Well, they started doing something to their buns. They butter them up now. They're buttered. The patties, which I hate that word, moist patties, are thicker and juicier. It's ungodly good. Okay. I got a Wendy's burger over the weekend. Weird. And I have to say, that patty was juicy. And Rebecca looked at it. She's a vegetarian. She looked at it. She goes, oh, wow. She goes, is that good? And I go, yeah, that's pretty good. She goes, I don't like that kind of stuff. That looks good. You remember the Wendy's patty? They used to hang, like it was thin, and it used to kind of hang over the edge. Like a square. This SOB is thick. It's still square. It's square, but it's thick. And you can see, like when you bite into it, it's juicy. It's juicy. Which I don't know how they do because there's no fast food really that's figured out how to do juicy. Right. It was juicy. It's juicy. It was good. And you add that in.

46:15With their new fries that are outstanding. Sea salt, you know, skin on fries. Natural skin fries. Natural skin fries. Oh, my God. I know. I was like, oh, great. Great. They may be the best fast food place. I mean. I know that's a strong statement. It's got to be now. It's got to be. They have. What they've done. We're not even doing a freaking advertisement right now. The buns. The buttered buns. Oh, dude. Real good. I got a vanilla Frosty with it. You guys are both drooling. Dip some fries in there. My mouth is going to salivate. Mine too. Dip some fries in the vanilla Frosty. Do you ever write about your meals in your recap? Yes, occasionally. Is that the most important part of your day? We write about what's important to us, okay? I put it to you. You can all feast. Who has the best milkshake in San Diego? Milkshake. Yeah, where do you want a milkshake? Hodads? Hodads. See, the thing about Hodads, though, the thing about Hodads to me is, like, to me, it just seems like they just scooped ice cream into the cup. That's right on top. It's an ice cream. Well, then why not just get ice cream? Yeah. The one at the counter is pretty good. The counter. That's it. Dude. Hodads for me.

47:24But it's just ice cream. No, just the top part. They make them the shake. Oh, okay. And then they take a big dollop of chocolate ice cream and just wallop it on the top. So the shake is down below it. Down below. So then you do your shake and then you're like, I'm going to have some ice cream now too. Okay, okay. It's an investment. You have to be hungry and you have to be in the mood for a big old dessert. If you made a call, what would you say? The counter or ho-dads? Ho-dads. I'm going counter. Counters are impeccable. Whipped cream, a cherry, it's impeccable. All I know is that when we went to Hodad's, Woods got the milkshake, and I just took a spoon and ate that hard ice cream. Now I want to go try it. Yeah, you should. I leave there shaky, though, because I get the chocolate one. Yeah. You got to split it. It's a good thing to split with somebody. The counter does make some dang good milkshakes. Oh, yeah. 5701949. We did not plan on talking about milkshakes. Or food. Or food, but if you want to tell us where it's in. Good milkshake. Well, I have a good milkshake, and it brings all the boys to the yard. What is it? Oh, your milkshake. Yeah, it does. It's yours. It's yours. Wow. Your milkshake. But nobody wants to buy it. They just want to rent it. Yes. Oh, my gosh. Just going to borrow it. Gosh darn, Jay. Wasn't it enough to write a song about it? Always a single lady. Been a single lady. Non-committed lady. You got it. All right. Thank you. Drying up lady. Drying up lady. Drying up lady. It almost sounded like drying up the lady.

48:51He's just kind of in a stream of consciousness. Poetry. Poetry. Poetry. Yeah, they sounded real good. Weird. I'm going to start working out. Isolate. We've been working together for a year and a half, and you've been going to work out for a year and a half now. He hates it so much. I know. You shouldn't even say it because he hates it so much. Gosh, you hate when I say it. Do it. Do it. Surprise me. Do it. Gosh, darn, dude. Shock me. I'll get you a freaking limo ride to REI. Buy a pair of shoes. God. Oh, my gosh. A hamburger don't have nothing on you. Freaking Brutus and all those. Who's the guy to love that? Grimace. Grimace. Dumb self. I hate you, Jay, for messing up a fat joke. I hate myself. M1 Dillweed from Coronado Island. I think my brother Mark has actually said this. Go ahead. Yeah, my brother. It's in Coronado, right?

50:04Tenth and orange. My brother talks about a milkshake of all the random things in the world. My brother lives in Tucson. He comes to San Diego. Whenever he comes to San Diego, he likes to go to Coronado. I go, why do you go there? And he said they have a place called Clayton's that's got great milkshakes. I forgot about that until you just said it. They're the bomb. Right on. Hey, tell your partner, I went two for three last night at Wood Bat League. There you go, dude. There you go. Atta boy. Good job, brother. You guys have a great day. You too, man. Did he mean life partner? Yes. Life partner. Probably. Woods isn't my life partner. He's just a friend. He's just a friend. With benefits. Yes. M1 Tony from Lemon Grove. Mikey, there's this place over by a grocery store called the Beef and Bun. It's got a milkshake. That'll blow your mind. Beef and Bun sounds good. I've never tried the burgers there either. That sounds great. Beef and Bun. The shakes there, they got a chocolate peanut butter shake. Too rich for me. That's too rich for me. So good, so good, so good. What do you like about their shakes? I mean, they have a couple fruit shakes, too. They're like natural. You get fruit chunks in them. In, in, in, in, in. That's a smoothie. In, in, in. No, a smoothie's healthy. Yeah. This ain't healthy. This is ice cream with chunks in it. Yeah. If I'm going to be bad, I'm going to be bad. I don't want fruit chunks. You are. You're getting ice cream. You're getting milk.

51:34And it's all squirreled together, but it's got stuff in it. I like that. I love that. By the way, this is, and you may or may not agree with it, don't you hate, I hate having to work at a milkshake. I don't like that. I don't either, man. Yes, I don't like getting a milkshake and you go. Yeah, it hurts. Yep. Yeah. I don't like, I just want to draw on the straw. Well, then Wendy's is a problem. Because you have to eat that with a spoon. I'm not a Wendy's guy. I don't do the shake at Wendy's. I don't like the frost either. I love the frost. I don't like to shake it in and out either. Same problem. Oh, in and out shake will get you, dude. You're trying so hard. Give yourself a migraine. It looks like a shake. You can drink it. You can suck it through the straw. What's the point? I get it. You're thick. Great. Nah. Peace. Peace. Gosh darn. You proved it. You proved your point. You're a badass. You're a badass shape. You're the thickest around. In fact, you won. You win. But now, guess what? I just spent $220 on you. I've got to wait 35 to 45 minutes to eat you now. To drink you. Now what do I do? Then it all pools at the top. Right. And then the ice cream's at the bottom. So you've got chocolate water and ice cream now. Sick. Somebody tell us where you can get a milkshake.

52:50like I'm saying, where you drink it and you don't have to work at it. Counter. The counter is a great shake. You can drink it. You don't have to try. It's good consistency. 570-1949 is our number. If you want to give us a call. Let's see. What am I missing? L-O-B yesterday ate some pho. That's P-H-O. Pho. What pho? It was phone. Actually, I thought it was pho. Is it? I've heard it was pho. That's if you're super into the Asian culture. I've heard pho. What's the deal? I had it for two days in a row because I've been getting sick. Oh, and you believe that that will help you to get better. Well, it clears up when my nose gets all...

53:50you know, stuffy. It clears the hot because I put a ton of sriracha in there and the chili paste and it will clear things up and I'm like, I can breathe now. Now, she will not go to a doctor. She refuses to go to a doctor. And if you get her in a doctor, what the doctor will prescribe is merely a suggestion. She has at home a file folder. full of prescriptions. And we asked her, we were like, well, what is that? And she goes, I don't fill them. We said, why not? She goes, I don't know what they're giving me. Yeah. I said, but LOP, but they do. They're a doctor. Over Medicaid. Over Medicaid, she believes. She thinks they're in cahoots with the pharmaceutical companies. Yes. And they're just trying to dope her up and sell pills. They are. They're getting their kickbacks from the pharmaceuticals. Pharmaceuticals. So what she'll do is, she'll go on, she'll

54:49What you call, hear them out. Yeah. What do you have to say? What's your recommendation? What's your recommendation? And can I find a natural alternative for that? Which I will. And how's that working for you? Well, I was fine up until yesterday when you hugged me. And now I feel like death. Did he give you a kiss or anything on the cheek? No, I said, don't touch me, don't touch me. And he went, gave me a big bear hug. And spit all over my face. Yes, I spit. In an open mouth. An open mouth spit. Amazing. 570-194-9 is our number. There's some stuff that you think that you actually don't think that you should clean. You should. LLB will love this. Three things that you never clean, but you should be cleaning these things. Word of the day has not been said. The word is plaster. And we'll tell you about it.

56:10Part of the Mikey Show now. Text them at 949mikey at gmail.com. Or call Mikey now. More of the Mikey Show coming up in minutes on FM 94.9. Rocktoberfest returns to the streets of North Park. FM 94.9 presents Rocktoberfest. Supported by Bex. October 22nd, 30th and University. Featuring Everest. Featuring Everest. The Soft Pack. Dead Feather Moon. The Style Tones. Low Volts. And Heavy Gilt. Get tickets at FM949SD.com for 15 bucks. Lots of German food, German beer, and other stuff that Germans make that would be appropriate for a party. Rocktoberfest. For tickets and more info, log on to FM949SD.com. There is a great thing going on right now via AT&T. Now, last time you put gas in your car, you probably noticed gas costs a lot of money now. And you don't want to be spending it. You want to be saving it. And that's why the way to go for your internet is definitely AT&T Wired. $14.95 a month. And it goes for 12 months. And you're locked in at that price, which is awesome. You pocket the extra dough. Not to mention, it comes with the on-the-go access to their AT&T National Wi-Fi Network. No extra charge. The message is AT&T. They're the way to go.

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1:03:39This report brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners, your neighborhood Toyota dealer has a $25 mail-in rebate for any True Start or True 2 battery installed. Hey, why wait? Visit the experts today. See your participating Toyota dealer. Well, it looks like we've got some stuff going on here on the 5 northbound before SeaWorld Drive. Actually, they removed that car that was in the center divider. Small backup, though, as a result. In El Cajon, on the 67 southbound, it's pretty slow from Maple View Street to the 8. And La Mesa on the 125 northbound, that's got a backup from the 8 to Fletcher Parkway. This report brought to you by the California Lottery. With the Mega Millions jackpot at $86 million, you've got $86 million. million reasons to play. Drawings are every Tuesday and Friday. Mega millions from the California lottery. Imagine what a buck could do. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego, a Lincoln Financial Media Station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't have any, you know, athletic ability. Lauren. I worked at Comic-Con. Woods. I, to my credit, Steve Woods have a hole in one. And Jay. I love that sappy movie. On FM 94.9.

1:05:06Let me just say, for the record, that I love when my friend L.O.B. is healthy. However, however, there is something to truly love when she's feeling a little under the weather. Why? Because she wants comfort food. I do. Which is good for us. Which is great for us. Because I went to the bathroom, and when I walked back in here, Woods goes, R. O'Brien is going to have for breakfast. And I'm thinking, she's going to go nuts and have oatmeal. With brown sugar on top. If she did that, I'd be like, are you kidding me? With brown sugar. Yeah, because she eats the most healthy stuff ever. And I look over, and she's got a Denny's menu in her hand. And to me...

1:06:00It was almost like seeing your pastor doing coke. I couldn't believe that this healthy girl. What is this, day three for you guys? Oh my gosh. He is so mad. I walked out there to go to the restroom and he goes, God, y'all are fiends. You're fiends. He called us fiends. Because I was looking at the menu. I was looking at the menu for Chris to go, and he's like, yeah, he's fiends. Mike, you need to go back to rehab. You need to go to Betty Fab, Mike. Forget Betty Ford. You ain't cured. You ain't cured. You need to go to Betty Fab. You left too early. Still in the habit, aren't you? Yeah. How long did you do? 30 days? Should have been 30 years, Mike. I mean, yes. Oh, my God. I'm like, Chris, when you're out, pick up some kind of thing for nauseous. I'm nauseous. You got to do a year for every pound you're overweight. I mean, I'll never see you again.

1:07:07Ever. That's called life, Mike. I'm going to get Betty Fat on the phone and see if they got an extra large room with an extra large bed. Gosh. Imagine, hey, imagine this. Imagine his brain when his eyeballs saw us with a Denny's menu. Yeah, and he's like. Just snaps. In his head, he thought, I can't freaking do it again. Only it would say off work. I can't freaking be doing it again. Exactly. I can't. He texts Kim. You ain't going to believe it. You ain't going to believe it. Three days in a row. He calls Lauren's mom. He's like, I'm sorry. Intervention. I know when she moved out to California, you never thought this, but she works with two fat guys. What you going to do? What you going to do? I'm sorry. I'm disgusted. What'd you get, L.O.B.? The Moons Over Miami sandwich. Yes! I got the Moons Over Miami omelets. I almost got chicken fried steak because I thought it was chicken. It's not. Yes. It is steak that they fry it like chicken. Why do they do that? I don't know. They fool you. So good. She goes, is this chicken? And I said, what is it? She goes, it's chicken fried steak. No. That's steak, girl. That's steak, girl. Chicken fried chicken. That's chicken fried. Yeah. It's confusing. Yeah. It's delicious. 570.

1:08:33One ninety four nine is our number. And the word of the day is plaster. And so when you hear me say that, when I work it into a sentence, be caller number nine. And I'll give you a Bush filter and Chevelle tickets. I'm into this band right now called Need to Breathe. They sound like Kings of Leon and I really like them. And so and their music has been very inspiring for me. So I've been listening to a lot of their music lately. And it's kind of cheering me up and it's very inspirational, all that stuff. So I decide last night I'm going to go online and I'm going to look them up. I'm going to see if they have a website. So they do. And I go to their website and their website says that they've won all these awards and that their last record sold a billion records and that they were in the Billboard top 10 or something. And I'm like, wow, I didn't know this. And so I thought to myself. I don't ever go to shows, but apparently I go to shows now because I've been to a couple and I thought, okay, let me see if they're touring. And they're from a place called, not kidding, Possum Kingdom, South Carolina. What? That's their hometown, Possum Kingdom, South Carolina. And I'm like, these couple of rednecks are not coming to San Diego, California. But I'm like, hey, I'm going to take a look. I look on their tour webpage and I start scrolling down.

1:09:59And lo and behold, they're going to be in San Diego at a casino. And so I'm like, hey, I'll take it. You know, I look at the date and it is October 20th. And I'm like, all I got to do is see if it's a weekend. I go and I look at it. Not only is it not a weekend, it's the same night as the Taylor Swift concert, which I promised my wife I would take her to. And I actually, the thought went into my head, okay? I actually thought to myself, now, if we weren't going to that, would she ever go to a casino with me to see a band because I liked them? And I knew instantly, eh, she would. A hundred. Yeah. I start looking at some of their previous dates, and I looked at their future dates. And my eyes kind of bug out because they're going to be playing Madison Square Garden.

1:11:04And I'm like going backwards and I'm like, holy cow, they're playing a couple of big venues. And then I look and I go, wait, this isn't a surprise that there's still tickets left. But there's still tickets left for the Dallas Cowboys Stadium. Now that's a huge place. And I'm like, I can see how they haven't sold that out. But, you know, what gives? So I click for tickets. And you know what pops up on my screen? Taylor Swift. They're playing an opening for Taylor Swift at the Valley View Casino Center. Bam! You get to see them. They're going to be at the sports arena, which has been renamed the Valley View Casino Center. Get out of here. So I get to see Need to Breathe. They're opening for Taylor Swift the night that I take my wife. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. How rad is that? Oh, when my brain put together what was happening, I was like, is this really happening right now?

1:12:06That is, I get these emails from a lot of my favorite artists, and I got one yesterday from Chris Cornell. Yeah. And he's redoing his songbook tour, so he's just acoustic. Right. And it's that feeling every time when I see the date and I go, okay, here we go. And I go to the calendar, and I'm like, here we go, December 17th. Please be a weekend. Please be a weekend. Bam! I'm like, yes! You're in. It's like the greatest feeling ever. They're playing at the Balboa. He's playing at the Balboa Center. Yep. December 17th. So this is what need to breathe. This song has been stuck in my head. They're like a sober Kings of Leon. Yes. And they're like the lead singer almost looks like Caleb and it's two brothers that are in the band. And my big thing when I was hearing them or when I was reading about them was they were critically acclaimed which I don't like. Unless it's a movie. Yes. I do like that. Such a weirdo. But I don't like If Rolling Stone likes something. I don't like it. If Spin likes something, I want to jump off a building. You are polar opposites with movies and music. Yes. Polar. Yes. Yes. The more abstract the movie, the better. The more abstract the music, the worst. The music, the worst. And I go, oh, I know why they like it. There's banjo in it. That's why Spin likes it. There's a banjo. They're a rock band, but they've put banjo in their music.

1:13:49Oh, I get it. I get it. There was a guy that was listening to it and he was like, what is this rubbish? I can sing along to it. And then he heard banjo and he went, wait, hold on. If I look at that picture and they're wearing suspenders, I will absolutely poop my pants. I'm in. Poop my pants. Three things that you don't clean, but you should. Your teeth. Well, most people do, Woodsy. Most people brush. Most people will brush. But I'll tell you what most people won't do. They won't clean their phone. Have you cleaned your phone, your cell phone? Never. Never. Your cell phone, that thing's got more bacteria on it because we take them with us everywhere and we use them without washing our hands. Our home phones collect bacteria, but we don't use our home phones. A lot of people don't have home phones. Just use their cell. The work phone is a little safer.

1:15:01Some of us don't use our work phone rarely ever, so it doesn't matter. Never pick mine up here. I went to get a facial like five years ago when the flip phones were still in. And I had like a little patch on my jawline where I was kind of like breaking out. And I kept telling her, I'm like, I don't know what's going on. I don't get this anywhere else, but right by my jawline. She's like, your cell phone. Gosh, I was like, I know it. So I clean it now. Of course you do. Does anybody have a phone that they share with their wife, like a home phone? I share the home phone. You know, we got a home phone. One more time, Jay. One more time. I didn't see that. Oh, sorry. Sorry. If you got a home phone like I do, sometimes I'll have makeup on it. On the numbers. There was a guy that we used to work with, and we would take his headset off his phone and put it on other people's phones because it was just black. And so you'd go to, and we'd move it around all the time, and you'd go to answer your phone, and you're like, ah! Oh, gosh. It was disgusting. It was dirt and like oily, waxy stuff. We used to put gel sanitizer on the ring of the headphones so they'd go to make a call and then it would be sanitizer. Oh, my God. At least it was clean, though. Your dishwasher. The hot water gets the bacteria inside, but not the door handle and all that. Dude, it's a breeding ground.

1:16:26It's hideous. Yeah, you think about that. From mold and mildew. It's so disgusting. And we don't realize it. We just use it like normal. And also, your garbage can, like your kitchen garbage, nobody thinks of that. I do. You do? Yeah, Kim did too. But that thing will get, even with the bag, inside of the trash can, it gets stuff in there. A lot of times you'll get little holes in the bag because you'll throw something away that'll tear the bag and then... Next thing you know, you got stuff. You got trash juice in there. Trash juice. That's the worst. Bleach every once in a while. Yeah, bleach and pine salt and a little garden hose. Yeah, I just got a visual of Henry Hill cleaning out the trunk of the car. Yeah, exactly. That's exactly right. That's in the garbage can, Henry. Shut up, Karen. Be quiet, Karen. Don't worry about it. I hit a skunk, Karen. Oh, gosh. I'm great on the guard. Henry. That's awful. Shut up, Karen.

1:17:26What's in the garbage can? I hit a skunk! In the garbage can! It's disgusting. Freaking hideous. That scene makes me vomit. I know. First time you saw that, when he had his hands over his mouth, and he's got the spray nozzle spraying with soap inside of there. Oh, Henry, what is that? You're doing good, Karen Hill. Four, four, four. Janice Rossi. There's a whore in this building named Janice Rossi. Stay away from my husband. You didn't want to get Karen Hill upset. No. You didn't want to cheat with her husband. Oh, no. She's ringing that bell. Answer, I know you're in there. Let's see. Okay, so what has your wife trained you to do? For instance, my wife Rebecca has trained me to pick up my stuff off the floor. I occasionally will mess that up, but that was her pet peeve with me. Please do not, because I don't want to pick it up.

1:18:48And I'd rather you pick it up and put it in the hamper. That's why we have a hamper. Let's put it in the hamper. Because if I did not have a wife named Rebecca, when I did laundry, I'd just collect it right off the floor. Wow, really? Yeah, a week's worth. It would just be there on the floor. I'd take it off and I'd put it on the floor. What's it going to do? It's not going to harm anything. She likes it to look tidy. She likes it to look clean. But I'm like, does it matter? I mean, me and you are the only ones. But yes, it does. So when you lived on your own, that's what you did? Unless a girl came over. If a girl came over, you put it all in the closet. Or you open up a drawer that's empty and you put it all in one drawer. Under the bed is a good bit. When I was a kid, I did that. And then you vacuum and it looks like, wow, you are tidy. When I was a bachelor and I was in sales and I had to wear a suit and tie every day, imagine coming off work and leaving your dress shirts all over the floor with your suit and then being like...

1:19:43Where's my suit coat? And it's on the floor somewhere in a pile. Wrinkled. Wrinkled. It's just lazy. Has Jamie trained you to do anything? I think probably the only thing that I'm even remotely good at is cleaning the dishes, like washing the dishes and putting them in the dishwasher. 85% of the time I do it, and then I've gotten better about cleaning up pee and poop around the house from the dogs. That's good. Because you don't want standing pools of urine. No. Jay? Oh, man. What hasn't she trained me? When she met me, I would say clift. I would say giraffe. What's changed? It's a lot better. He's gotten better. A lot better. Clift. I don't know. He didn't say you fell off a cliff. He said you fell off a cliff. I would do anything to hear that. Me too. Wear a shirt at the table. Wait, wait. And giraffe. Giraffe. Like the animal? Yeah. Giraffe's big. And she would go, what are you saying, Jay? The giraffe. What is that? Come back with that again. How did she do it to make you not? Made fun of me like you guys do. Wear a shirt at the dinner table when we're eating dinner. You might be a redneck. I love that. Dishes away like everybody else. Hang on, Jay. If your wife Kim is like any wife, it takes a while. It's not instant.

1:21:09Exactly. So every once in a while does she still have to say to you, put a shirt on. Put a shirt on. I'll cook dinner with a shirt on. She's like, hey, shirtless guy, thanks for cooking dinner, but how about a shirt? That's hideous. Chest hair is just in your macaroni. That's disgusting. But let me tell you something. Guys, let me tell you. That is why men fall in love. Because that's what your mom will say things to you like. Put a shirt on. Yeah. Okay? Now, when you meet a woman and your woman is maternal, your brain processes that and says, she's taking care of me. I don't like it. There's a lot of things my wife does that my mom did that irritate me, but it's why I'm in love. Right. It's crazy. Anything else? That's the main. That's the main. Oh. Well, I can't. I don't want to talk about that one. Oh. Wow. You should not wear a condom, Mac. No. Still don't. We know four kids. Feels real good. Okay, great. What was it, Jay? What, Jay? What is it? He's really debating himself. It's just a toilet brush to brush out. I used to be a big lever of tiger claws. Hey, me too. My wife is not... Listen, we have a person that comes over and cleans. Wood said the funniest thing ever, and I actually thought of it this morning and couldn't remember it.

1:22:36It's the guy that's famous for the abstract paint. Jackson Pollock. Pollock. Yep. Uh-huh. Last time we talked about that, Woods goes, yeah, it looks like a Jackson Pollock man. It's true. Oh, my God. Our toilets here at the building look like Jackson Pollock was in there. There's no brush here. No, there's no brush. My bad. It's hideous. It's all J, too. The power of the toilet water isn't enough for you. It's not enough. It's not enough. Sometimes. Oh, my God. Why call it the tiger claw? Like, he's drinking. It's industrial strength speed. It's jet engine. It's a jet engine. Not good enough. Not good enough. Not good enough. Three or four times. It actually was a huge argument that we went through, too, because she was like, well, just you have to stay there until it's done. And I was like, well, there's no brush. There's no brush. You have to put a brush. She goes, I don't like a toilet brush. I'm like, well, what do you expect me to do? Oh, am I supposed to just keep flushing until it's gone? I'll be here all day. Oh, my God. Jay, dinner time. I can't. I can't. I've been here two and a half hours. I haven't even made a dance. I'll make an appointment with you. I'll see you tomorrow at 4. 570-1949. What is it that your wife has trained you to do? 570-1949.

1:24:20On FM 94.9. With all the attention we gave to features in the new 2012 Dodge Charger, like over 60 standard and available safety and security features and standard Uconnect touchscreen, you might be wondering about the performance. Well, open the hood. That engine you see gives Charger an impressive 292 horses and best-in-class 31 miles per gallon highway with an available new 8-speed automatic to turn all that power into crisp forward motion. Now close the hood. and wonder no more. The new Dodge Charger. Now, get 0% APR financing or $2,000 cash allowance on 2011 Dodge Charger and Challenger. Visit your SoCal Dodge dealer. EPA estimated miles per gallon. Actual mileage varies. Wards vehicle segmentation. Financing for well-qualified buyers through Ally. Not all buyers will qualify. Residency restrictions apply. Offers end October 31, 2011. Dodge is a registered trademark of Chrysler Group, LLC. So tonight's a big night, ladies and gentlemen, on ABC10. Tonight is the start of Charlie's Angels. It's at 8 o'clock. Hi, Charlie. How are you? Good, Charlie. Well, we've got an assignment for you, the rest of you girls there. Hi, Charlie. Who's that? It's Abby. She's new. Abby's new? Hi. Hello, Abby. Hello. We love Abby, Charlie.

1:25:51Did you guys hire Abby? Um, yeah, we're giving her a shot. Equal opportunity. Okay, Abby, well, you're an angel, eh? Fair enough. Didn't really expect you, Abby. Didn't really expect you, Charlie. Not all angels have wings, Charlie. Okay, well. Some of us have other things. Just keep it at that. Oh, Abby. That's tonight. Charlie's Angels. Channel 10, ABC 10 at 8 p.m. And then also tonight, at 9 o'clock, ladies and gentlemen, it is going to be the two-hour season premiere of Grey's Anatomy. Hello, Sharon. Hello, Doctor. Is your wife with you now? Yes, I'm Sharon, and this is my wife. I am so sorry. I am so sorry.

1:26:55I'm so sorry. You're Sharon? Yes. That's your wife? Yes, Katie. Katie, your husband's name is Sharon. That's right. Okay. I just wanted to tell you that we've been working hard here at Grey's Anatomy to try to save your soup. You brought it in. It was not doing good. We put it on a life support system, and we lost it. What do you mean? Like you can't find it? Yeah, we actually lost it. You misplaced it. We misplaced it. We actually misplaced it. Someone's looking for it, I hope. You ever hear of malpractice? I have, but it's soup. Get ready for it. That's tonight at 9, two-hour season premiere of Grey's Anatomy. Charlie's Angels Grey's Anatomy 8 and 9. And then don't miss 10 News at 11. After you watch Grey's Anatomy, you stay for 10 News at 11 with Kimberly Hunt, Steve Atkinson,

1:28:01Pat Brown with Pinpoint Weather. That's tonight on ABC10. To get your week running like clockwork, it's good to start with a plan. And the Vons Weekly Ad is a great place to start. Our fantastic deals make shopping so much easier. You'll find delicious meal ideas plus stock-up prices on home essentials all in your weekly Vons ad. Shop Vons today to get these Vons Club specials. It's our mix and match event. You'll get 50 cents off each participating item when you buy eight or more items on top of great Vons Club prices. Mix and match items like eight packs of Gatorade for only $3.99 each, plus CRV selected varieties. General Mills Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Cheerios for just $1.89 each. And Dreyer's Ice Cream for only $2.99 each, selected varieties. And it's easy to stay healthy this flu season when you get a flu shot at the Vons Pharmacy. No appointment necessary, and you'll get 10% off your groceries. Vons. Ingredients for life. Age restrictions apply. See pharmacy for details. Coupon expires one week from issue. Other restrictions may apply. Mom, I want to be a pilot. Is it tough? It's not easy. You could do it. Study hard. Go to a good school. Never skip your math homework. Piece of cake. Oh, yeah? But can you finish those carrots for your pilot's vision? I'd rather do my math homework. Thought so.

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1:32:32Now get 0% APR financing for 60 months or 1,000 cash allowance on the 2011 Jeep Wrangler and Wrangler Unlimited at your SoCal Jeep dealer. EPA estimated fuel economy 17 city and 21 highway for Wrangler two-door. Actual results may vary based on Ward's vehicle segmentation when properly equipped. 0% APR financing for 60 months equals $16.67 per month for 1,000 financed for well-qualified buyers regardless of down payment and financed through Ally. Not all buyers will qualify. Residency restriction supply offers in 1031. Jeep is a registered trademark of Chrysler Group, LLC. The production is back at full speed. And your Honda dealers of San Diego County are getting ready for a big fourth quarter. They've got plenty of cars and plenty of deals. Visit SDHondaDealers.com today. It's good to be back. This report brought to you by Allstate. Call Allstate now and you'll get a lifetime membership in Good Hands Roadside Assistance. Absolutely free. Shop less, get more, make one call to an Allstate agent. Find one near you at Allstate.com. Heading on the 94 westbound of the ramp to the 805, there's a car and a big rig that got into it. They're both on that right shoulder. Escondido delayed on the 15 southbound from the 78 to Via Rancho Parkway. And you'll find some backup on the 5 southbound from Palomar Street to the 905. This report also brought to you by Jack in the Box. Try Jack's new jumbo breakfast platter, eight mini pancakes, scrambled eggs, hash brown sticks, and bacon or sausage. All for only $2.99 plus tax. It's available all day at participating restaurants. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM News.

1:33:57It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Good morning to you. This is Bird with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Thursday morning. This is being brought to you by Folky Boy Clothing Line. Surfwise today is looking at a slight but steady increase in the south-southwest. Pretty swell, starting to show its face. Not much to begin with today, but it's going to fill in throughout the day, too. A little bit of a background northwest to help break it up at the same time as well. Overcast skies, relatively clean conditions right now. Looking like we're seeing some neat waste highways for the post parts, and every once in a while you'll get that chest tight set. Standout spots, seeing even some larger sets, but again, very inconsistent as the southwesters slowly creeps into our window. It's not going to be real big anyways, but at least there's a little bit more size than there has been, and there's going to be more as the day continues. If you're going to surf right now, be patient and wait. I'm going to wait a couple hours and try to go back out this afternoon. For up-to-the-minute surf reports, forecasts, go to surfline.com, and for all your surfboard restoration needs, go see Joe Roper. He's a miracle man. The authentic surf report can be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Let's get to the point. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the program.

1:35:25I'm your diminutive friend. Woods. I am real talented, but I'm not stupid. Lauren. I accidentally had a piece of beef yesterday. Yes! And Jay. I light my coffee black. On FM 94.9. Jay standing in line at Tower Records the day that this record first came out. 30 years ago today. 30 years ago. It's plastering, plastered Jerry Rafferty posters all over his van. Pretty sure it was the 8-track. The 8-track. Have you been down the five, going home, the five north, and seen the giant poster of Gordon Lightfoot? Oh, my gosh. Identical J. Every day I drive by and I go, identical freak. I want to stop, take a picture, and post it. Identical J. Gordon Lightfoot. Name any other song that he has besides the wreck of the Edmonds Fitzgerald. Yeah, Gordon Lightfoot. Okay.

1:36:31If you could read my mind, Lord. Oh, wow. Look at you go. Wow. Mine was Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald. That's it. What about the Edmund Fitzgerald? Yeah, that too. That one too? Either one. You can just pick it. So if you're heading north on the five, look to your left. It's right around the 805 split. There's a giant Gordon Lightfoot. Oh, it's the 805 before you get to the five. Right. It's 805. Oh, I thought it was right after. It's I. identical J.S. Bell. Found another very popular Gordon Lightfoot song. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's a great one. Great storyteller, that guy. He is. The songs were good. Oh, I might go to the concert now. Yeah. This is what I'm signing up for. Identical. No way he can hit those notes. No way. Sometimes. You better take care. Where's he playing? Some casino. Maybe Paula? Oh, yeah. That's a good one, too. Oh, man. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Carefree Highway. Carefree Highway. Yep. I hope it's on a weekend. I'm in. I hope it's on a weekend. I didn't realize I liked so much Gordon Lightfoot. Who knew? Would you be okay if I took the day off because I had to go to Gordon Lightfoot? Ella V, you don't even know who he is. No, I like him now. I'm in. I've heard all those songs. I didn't know who they were.

1:38:05Do you know this one? Oh, yeah. There must have been a period in the 90s where he was calling casinos in Tahoe, and they were like, sorry, Gordon. Sorry, pal. We got your message. We just didn't call you back. Okay, I just, it's okay. I just wanted to call you. Identical, Gordon. Identical. No, no, no, I know. I just didn't. Maybe you guys are busy. This is Joe from Bally's Casino. You ain't playing here. Okay. That's fine. That's fine. I wasn't really asking to play. I was just calling to see how you were doing with entertainment. Well, I can do 70 bucks at my kid's bar mitzvah. Does that work for you? Well, you know, it's kind of an insult. Saying sundown and everything, it's kind of an insult. Take it or leave it. I'll get free hot dogs and hamburgers. Will you do 80?

1:39:05I'll do 75. All right. I wore out this album. Amazing. Hey, Trebek. Who's been calling again? Oh, my God. Listen, he's on the line. Oh, my God. He's calling again. He just hadn't gotten a callback from Phil, and I just wondered if you guys could get my message. And so if you get my message, you guys pick up if you're there, because I know you're there. Don't you dare pick up? Don't you dare pick up, Phil? Listen, I remember back in the day I played the Tropicana. And this is Phil. Phil! Phil, my goodness, didn't expect you to pick up. Oh, my gosh, neither did I. I had to pick up because I don't have any room left on this tape. Okay? Well, Phil, you know, I... No, you probably don't remember, but I knew your grandfather very well. Yes, I've heard all about it. Listen, Gordon, if you can read my mind, then you should get it. Just hang up on it. You have work to do it. $75,000 a night back in the day, Phil. Long time ago. I watched your diapers being changed when I was doing cocaine off of hooker's butts. Fair enough. But anyway, hey, listen. How about this? Go ahead.

1:40:19I'm not calling for a job. I just wondered how things were. Things are great here at the Tropicana. You guys doing good on entertainment? We're fine. Hang up on Gil Littlefoot. You can play the... Is that Cynthia? It's Gil Littlefoot. Listen, you can play the valet party. How much? It's whatever you can get in tips. Open a guitar case. You play out by the valet stand. I do work for tips. You do now. Don't let him near the building, Phil. Is it a Friday or Saturday night? It is a Friday and Saturday night. Dundee. Dundee. Whatever you can make, you take. You're dealing with him from now on. Fine. 75-year-old women there. Oh, yeah. Granny panties. Granny panties all over the stage. Concert's done. You know, there's 75-old women just dying. He walks backstage. He's like, see that, Phil? Did you? Yes, it was outside. Yes, it was near the valet. But did you see it? Seventy-five women, Phil! How much did you make? Twenty-two, twenty-three, twenty-four, twenty-five, forty-five, forty-six, forty-seven, forty-eight. Nice. Sixty-eight, sixty-nine, seventy, seventy-one dollars. Good for you. Well done, Gordon.

1:41:42$71, Phil. $71 more than you made tonight singing. Not true. I make $250,000 a year. Well, you ever had a gold record? I have. No. I have a job, though. Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald. Oh, so good. This used to kill him. Jay loves it. He loves it. Oh, I love it. Jay, maybe we go to the show. Let's go. Maybe we get him in here. I bet. Let's get him. I don't think it will be hard. Don't tease Mike. I don't think it will. I wonder if he'd sing one of his songs. He has to come into studio. Let's do it. Would be incredible. Let's freaking do it. Write it down. Let's get him. I think the show is either October 5th or November 5th. I see the thing every day. I've been seeing it. And I drive by and I go. Identical Jay as well. Wherever he's playing, Jay's going to call and they're going to pick up. What? What? What? What? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You want Gordon? Yeah. Are you guys at AM Gold Station? No, no, no, no. We're just a radio station. We'll roll him in there for you guys. You know who Gordon Lightfoot is, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We want him. We want him. You've got to do that song. If he does that song live, I will throw my panties. I would love it. My panties will end up on that stage for sure.

1:42:56Isn't this song about a ship or something? Sailor. The Edmonds Fitzgerald. Yep. What gave this guy the rocks to write a song about an old sailing vessel? Yeah. I mean, you've got a set on you. If you're like, I'm going to write a song, and it's going to be about a sailing vessel, and I don't give two credit. And his manager's like, dude, you're not writing about the freaking... Yes, I am. It's going to be a hit. No, it's not going to be a hit. When the cook says it's been good to know you, and he knows they can't serve him breakfast, it's like... Jay starts crying. He's so into it. Oh, no. Another brick falls with Jay Ismail. That's right. Kills. You can see I'm not going to read it. I'm going to read it. In fact, it's already written. And it's going straight to every AM radio station in this country, and they're going to spin it. That's a true statement. It was a monster hit. Oh, that's good. That's so good.

1:43:51I'll bet you Jay gets Gordon. Oh, that'd be great. I'm not going to take no for an answer. I'm going to bust my ass to get him in here. M1. Kiko from Mission Valley, what was the word of the day? Blaster. That is correct. You're going to see Bush, Filter, and Chevelle. Hang on the line, please. Okay, so Jason R. Isbell does not disappoint. Has never disappointed. Never. Yesterday was no exception. We're doing a meeting. This could be so many things. Yes, it could. We're doing a meeting, and the way that we do the meeting is we all come with ideas for the program, and we put our names into a basket, and we draw a name, and that person goes. And I have a way that I do it every time where I go. I am now reaching into the basket. I am drawing a name, and the name that I have drawn out of the basket's name is?

1:44:53And I always do it the same way. Always. Always. Always. And then I sit in the corner and do a drum roll. Yeah. L-O-B writes down all the stuff. And that happened a few times yesterday where Jay said the word always. Always. Always. And Woods, I probably heard Woods about 15 times yesterday go. What's always? And Jay doesn't acknowledge it, doesn't respond to it. He used to be like, like it always happens. Like not never, like always. Now he's just quiet when Woods goes, what's always? What's always? So I am convinced. Well, first of all, before we even do that, before we even do that, before we tell you about Jay's awesome meeting ideas, let me tell you what kind of balls on him now. Now he's decided, listen, when it comes to my recaps, I don't got to write them. I'll find something funny, copy and paste it. Listen to his recap. Yes, I kept it formatted the way it was on purpose. Thank you. On purpose. Top changes you'll see at the end of Don't Ask, Don't Tell. That's his recap. You lazy mother. Now that it's officially been repealed, let's take a look at the top changes you'll see with the end of Don't Ask, Don't Tell.

1:46:14Again, this is what Jay was up to yesterday. The officer in charge of doling out Hummers is not talking about cars. All wars will come to a screeching halt during glee. Goodbye, drab olive fatigues. Hello, delicious turquoise ones. Troops will be eager to invade Chad. You silly sausage. Instead of a bugle, troops will now rise to wake me up before you go. This is his recap. This is Jay's recap. Yes. Lest anybody think. Lest anybody think. Yes. Do it maybe in J-Boy so they know. The mess hall will now be the very neat and tatty hall. Get it? Instead of bombs, the army will defeat enemies with an even more effective weapon. Sass.

1:47:29Wiener time. All our troops will go AWOL every time there's a duvet sale at Pottery Barn. Wow, David said duvet. Duvet sale. A duvet sale. So I know he didn't write it. Soldiers will only be able to carry whatever supplies they can fit into a fanny pack. Ten hut and a salute will be replaced with... Hi. And two finger snaps. Listen to him. Listen to him. He's laughing. That's his recap. That's his recap. I got that this morning. I didn't read it at first. I just saw the format. I'm like, this is a news story. Right. Popped into an email. So I'm like, you know, talking out loud to Woods. I'm like, Jay put, did you see Jay's recap is, he goes, oh yeah, I read it. He's a comedian. I go, he didn't write that.

1:48:46That's Woods' bit, by the way. Jay cover. He takes Jay cover. Jay can have pie sauce all over his hands. And I'll go, holy cow, Jay dipped into that pie. And Woods will go, I don't think he did. Thank you, Woods. I'm a team player. I think the funny thing is that I go, did you see how it was spelled and formatted? Jay didn't write that. Because it was in Jay's blog last night, because that's also his book. Yeah, whatever is in his recap, you may also find in his blog at mikeyshow.com. There you go. Two birds. There's two things I don't like. More than that, but here's two of the top ones. Don't like writing that stupid recap Mike says I gotta write. Second of all, what the hell's a blog? I don't like either one. So I kill two birds with one stone, and I go to some website. Here's what I googled. I'll google. The words, something funny. Something funny. All right, and yesterday I Googled something funny, and the thing came up about the gays, and I copied and pasted it, and I put it in there. And Mike is so stupid. He didn't even notice I plagiarized it. He didn't even notice I plagiarized it.

1:50:04Why is he so stupid? No clue. Not a clue in that empty head. It's just a big old stupid Mexican ball of head. And I mean big. Big. I mean, have you seen it? Full of tacos and burritos. That's all he thinks about. Is that dummy? He'll get it. He'll get it. He'll think it's my stupid recap, whatever the hell that is. And I read it. Recap. I said full of tacos and burritos. How many hints can I give myself? Yes, darn it. Hit it, Jake. I said for a taco. There's some burritos. Can't get to it. I like tacos and burritos. Play me the trick, myself. Can I fuck? I want tacos and burritos. There you go. Gosh, darn it. You don't have your dialing one, Fat Fingers? Your old A-pigoda fingers? Like being a sausage. Gosh darn it, I see an eel smaller than them fingers. Full ground. Betty fat, Mike. Betty fat. Don't stay away from Betty Ford. That didn't do anything for you. Betty fat. Let's go to Betty fat. Well, what I wanted to tell you about is this guy's, and I don't say anything, and the reason I don't say anything is because, first of all, it's your fault, M1. Yeah. You love him.

1:51:37You love him so much. You celebrate everything he does. Celebrate it all. What am I supposed to do? Get mad at him? And Woods says on a daily basis, if we did this, what am I going to do? What am I going to do? Kill us. What do you do? Different kids. Treat them different. Different kids. It's a weak bit. It's a weak bit, dude. It's a very weak bit. You slay the guy, right? Freaking divet. That's the guy's recap today. Spent four hours on mine. Recapping what you had for dinner. Here's the deal. I have to tell you what he brought up in the meeting. I can't wait for you to pick which one it is. Because like he said, it could be one of ten ideas. And mind you, this is... Completely legit. This is what he says. Yes. I always have to look my sexiest. That's why I'm wearing these tight size 42 pens. Be a part of the show. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm sorry, our time is up. FM 94.9. What if you could lose 30 pounds by doing one thing once a day?

1:53:15Once a day? Just one time? I would definitely try it. If you're trying to lose over 30 pounds, but don't want the counting and complication of diets, you can be among the first to receive an amazing proven breakthrough in weight loss. A once-daily capsule that can help you lose weight in days. For a 30-day risk-free trial, call 1-800-226-1548. Acai Fresh is one of the healthiest ways to lose weight. Each capsule contains natural ingredients to boost your metabolic heart rate. allowing you to shed pounds with just one capsule a day. Be among the first to call for your risk-free trial and get yours right now. Once a day, I can do that. If you would like to lose 30 pounds or more by taking just one all-natural capsule a day, call for the risk-free trial, 1-800-226-1548. That number again is 1-800-226-1548. 1-800-226-1548. I've said this before about what it is that I love about BMWs. One of the things that I love is the technology. I think it's safe to say, and I don't think that I'll bother BMW by telling you this or by saying this. I hope they don't find this negative. They overdo it. BMW overdoes it. What they do when they design a car is they go, we're going to think of everything that you could possibly need.

1:54:37But then we're going to go extra steps. We're going to think of other stuff that you just, we want to surprise you. That's the BMW experience. If anybody asked, why do you like those vehicles? First of all, they drive completely different than any other vehicle that you've ever driven. They feel differently. They respond differently. Right now, they're letting me drive their 650i convertible and the information system that they have. That sits on that dashboard. Is amazing. And they'll do real-time traffic and stuff. It's amazing. It's an amazing thing. So you can see real-time traffic right there in your nav system. But here's the thing. If you're looking for a BMW. Through Sunday. Through Sunday. You can lease. A new 2011 328i. For only $279 a month. Plus tax. A new. 2011, 328i for just $279 a month. Fully equipped with leather alloy wheels. That's now through Sunday. It's only BMW Encinitas. The only place that I'll go, BMW Encinitas, is the Mikey Show's place. It's on Encinitas Boulevard between the 5 and El Camino Real. Or find them online, bmwencinitas.com.

1:56:00This is Radio Burger King, the sound of value and flavor. Thank you. Two simple words that we just don't hear enough. Well, Burger King is saying thank you by giving you a cool, creamy soft serve cone or cup with the purchase of a value meal. That's a free soft serve, and all you have to do is enjoy a value meal. Is anybody else giving you something free right now? Well, then go to Burger King and get your soft serve. This is Radio BK. Price and participation vary. Limited time offer not valid during breakfast hours while supplies last. The Padres' schedule is winding down, but the baseball season continues with exciting playoff action. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show is your source for expanded pennant race coverage and the best Chargers reporting anywhere in San Diego. And, of course, we've set up camp at Montezuma Mesa for exciting Aztecs action all season long. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show, weeknights at 10 beginning in October on Channel 4 San Diego. Baseball action continues exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego.

1:57:07As the Padres continue their series with the Dodgers, 5 p.m. Saturday. From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse, go behind the headlines and sports pages and get to know the real people who don the Padres uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego. There's a rumor that San Diego is home to one of the most brilliant, insightful, and educational culinary TV shows ever created. And then there's my show. But it's big in taste and small in effort. Sam the Cooking Guy, Sundays at 5.30 and 7 p.m. only on Channel 4 San Diego. TV on the radio, Arctic Monkeys. This Saturday night, open air theater at SDSU. TV on the radio's new album, Nine Types of Light, available now. Buy tickets now at livenation.com. Arctic Monkeys' new album, Suck It and See, available now. TV on the radio and Arctic Monkeys live. Okay, so let me tell you about my credit union. They gave me advice, approved my mortgage, got an awesome rate, by the way, and they gave me money for closing costs. Who does that? Navy Federal Credit Union. That's who. Refinance your mortgage or purchase your new home with guaranteed low rates and up to $2,500 for your closing costs. Your personal mortgage rep guides you through, and before you know it, you're home.

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2:01:05Yeah, but is Verizon 4G LTE really that fast? And he says, yep, up to 10 times faster than 3G. Whoa. And now I'm going. They're going for two. Got it. Come to Verizon for the largest selection of 4G LTE devices and tear it up on the fastest, most advanced 4G network in America. Visit any Verizon store today, verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE, or call 1-800-256-4646. Verizon. Coverage details at verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE. This report brought to you by REMAX. Nobody sells more real estate than REMAX. Find an agent near you at REMAX.com. REMAX, outstanding agents, outstanding results. On the 5 southbound at Main Street, an accident on the right shoulder. Traffic cones causing delays on the 5 southbound after Carmel Valley Road.

2:01:53rolling around apparently in the number two lane. The 94 westbound ramp to the 805, an accident on the right shoulder. It's a car and a big rig. This report brought to you by Saquon Casino. Saquon Casino's $27 million makeover. It's complete. New game day sports bar and grill. New surf and turf buffet casino reimagined. Visit this weekend for the reopening celebration. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. I told Rebecca I loved her for the first time through text message. It was very heady. I don't like that. I like gritty drama. Just give me your opinion and I'll be on my way. And Jay. Keep it together. On FM 94.9.

2:02:53So I'm going to tell you about Jay's ideas yesterday. We'll do that in just a minute. Mikey Thawne, October 6th and 7th. Amy Schumer, comedian. She was on the Charlie Sheen roast. And she gets up and she says... that she was trying to make jokes about steve-o who we had on the air the other day uh and here is what she said she said i am truly uh she goes uh i am very sorry for the loss of your friend ryan dunn she's up giving the roast charlie sheen but looks over at steve steve-o and says hey i'm very sorry for the loss of your friend ryan dunn who died in the car accident right she goes i know you must have been thinking it could have been me

2:03:57Instead of, it should have been me. Right? That's the joke. Right. She goes, and I know we were all thinking, why wasn't it? Well, she got a bunch of backlash from it, and she wasn't backing down from it. She said, look, if anybody feels offended, I don't think I was out of line. It wasn't my intention to offend anybody. I wasn't actually making a joke about Ryan. I was making a joke about Steve-O. Either way, you said you wanted him dead in a car accident. Charlie Sheen quoted. Charlie Sheen wrote on tweet. What? Twitter. He tweeted. He tweeted. He put, shocking, Amy Schumer. You're beautiful, funny, and incredibly mean, and I love you. Which made me sick to my stomach because I was like, oh, cool. More mean. Yeah. Good.

2:05:04Reinforce how mean is funny, dip-ass. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? Well, I'm going to tell you about the baseball playoffs and a new deal in the NFL. But first, I want to tell you that the Sports Report is brought to you by U31 in North Park. That's where I'll be watching football this season, including this Sunday. Nice. From noon to two. Well, the baseball playoffs are now shaping up. The wild card standings in the National League have really tightened up. St. Louis is now only a game and a half behind Atlanta. The Braves lost again yesterday. The Giants won. They're three and a half behind the Braves. It is getting nasty. The Yankees did wrap up the East last night. So they're in. And it's going to be awesome, man. Playoffs start in about a week. And it's going to be exciting. And the NFL is also warning teams about faking injuries. I don't know if anybody saw the Monday night game. Two Giants at the same time dropped to the deck and grabbed at cramps that weren't really there. And they're saying, listen, man, you guys could be subject to fines.

2:06:04suspension or forfeiture of draft picks, it's getting crazy in the NFL. When I heard it, I was like, I remember that when I was a kid. Well, when a team is running a hurry-up offense and the defense is trying to do substitutions and they can't get guys on the field, they're getting called for penalties because the offense is running hurry-up, these guys will oftentimes just drop, ah, I've got to cramp, hold up, hold up, in order to stop them so they don't have to burn a timeout. And they're saying, you can't do that. No, they can't. And I don't even want my own team to do that. Hell no. It's disgusting. It's stupid. It's stupid. Okay, so our boy Jay, we're in a meeting, and he comes up with very salacious ideas. And he usually has a boatload of ideas. I mean, there's a stack of ideas. 25. Yep. And occasionally we'll do one. of the ideas. And the reason is because for many of the ideas, I have to say, no, no. And I'll say no, and he'll go, he'll look at the next idea and go, I won't do this one then. It's the greatest. Yeah. It's always stuff like, Mike, just bear with me. Hear me out. You've never gone into detail about what happened to you as a kid. Maybe you just do. I'm like, gee.

2:07:30What? Okay, fine. Forget it. Forget it. Lots of people through it. I want to know. People have been through it, but fine. Next. Next idea, Mike. Who was Pontius Pilate, really? Okay. No, fine. Fine. I guess we won't then. Fine. Mike, how about a motorboat contest with the Derby Dolls? I like it. Get them up here and we motorboat. No, Jay. How about... Men, Mike. I thought we were trying to get men. We are. I've always done that and don't have to do that. How about we take different fruits, we eat them on the air, and then describe what they taste like. But, Jay, what entertainment value. I get ones that people don't usually eat. Papaya. Or like a really sour lemon. You can be like, oh, dang. It's so sour. It's sour. It's sour. Is that a real idea, Jay, or did you just come up with that right this second? I wrote it here. It's written down. You don't want to show me the paper, though.

2:08:34Every time I say that, you hold the paper up, but then you put it right down. I never take the paper from you. I can't put a lemon in my lunch and I thought maybe it'd be funny. At least I come with ideas. Who doesn't? I'm looking at three of them. What? I have an idea, Mike. If you don't like it, it's okay. We don't have to do it. But haven't you ever wondered what's under that habit? What's under the habit? You mean a nun's habit, Jay? Yeah, we call it what's under the habit. Oh, are you real nuns? Okay, fine. We don't have to use real nuns. Strippers. We'll get strippers to do it. They'll probably do it if we pay them. How about we give nuns makeovers? Make them hot so maybe they can get a man. I've never seen a hot nun. Jay, no. Why not? Everyone deserves it. No, I don't want to do that.

2:09:29It's sacrilegious. We set up priests. Oh, I forgot. Mikey's religious. Sorry, I forgot. Sorry. Jasper gave me the idea and I wrote it down. Sorry, Deacon Mikey. Yeah, sorry, Pastor Mike. Deacon Mikey. I know you make me call you that from now on. Deacon Mikey. You an elder yet? Sorry, I know you're on your way to sainthood, is you? It's you. All right, Mike. This may get us in trouble, but what if we pull the fire alarms in the building just to see what happens? Jay, did you just think of that right now because you don't have an eye? I just saw a fire alarm. I saw that sprinkler head. I just came up with an idea. I was trying to think, okay, what can a sprinkler do? I could spit water all over you. Let me do that. We'll call it human sprinkler. Let's do human sprinkler. You dance. Come on. Let's try it out. Dance, Mike. It's true. It's true. This is true.

2:10:32So yesterday's idea was word association. I kept trying to figure out what was the point. Yeah, well, at first he just goes, hey, what about word association? And we go, you mean like just word association? Like the game that you take. It's like on the SATs sometimes. You take it when you're a little kid, you do it, you play it. Yeah. Or like a psychologist. Psychologist is what I meant. You'd know it from that. Yeah, it's true. So I go, and Jay, we moved on. What is that? What do you mean, what is that? I start with a word. I say a word. No, I know what word association. What is it? I think it would be funny. On the radio. On the radio. I think people in the cars would play along as well. And then we... There's no right answer. Whoever gets the most words wins. How do they play along? There's no right answer. Yeah, there's no right answer. It's not that there's a right answer. It's going to be funny. Let's try it. Okay, you start. Dog. Which way are we going? We're going this way. Okay. Cat. Mouse. Lauren. Okay. I'll tell you why I said that.

2:11:50Because we played a game once called Cat Mouse Clown. Bird Mouse Clown. Bird Mouse Clown. Cat Mouse Clown. And Bird Mouse Clown, the idea of it is that a girl is either a bird, a mouse, or a clown. Right. All girls. All girls. Every girl. Yes. Our moms, our aunts, our sisters, our lovers. And so, what was it? Mouse? Is that what you said? So, she's actually a bird. But when we said mouse... I remembered that game. She's a girl, and that's what came to my mind. Didn't even make it all the way around once, and it was already interesting and appealing. What is already? Go ahead. Can I start? You start. Here we go. This is a blast. Chippendale. All right. Well, it sounds like this is working out for you. Patrick Swayze. Tiny. Me. Not. What? Not. Me, and you said not. Not. Why not when I said me? She said tiny, and you said me, and you're not tiny. Any way for him to work in. See? See, Mike, I'll insult you. It doesn't matter what the game is. We can play hopscotch. Jacks. Remember Jacks? Remember Jacks, Mike? We did, yeah. Hey, look. Mike can't pick up the jacks with his fat fingers. Yeah, look. I'll spin a top, and I'll go, look. That top looks like Mike. Let's play jailbreak, but you can't ever get out because you're so fat. Jay, start. Bird.

2:13:25Mouse. Clown. J is Belle. You see, I have to stop you. Why? Well, because you're a clown. Oh. And when she said clown, I instantly thought of you. Yeah. Weird. See, this is good. Go ahead. It keeps getting stuck on the guy who invented it. Let's keep going. The Thomas Edison. It's stopping there. Let's try to keep it going. Treehouse. J. Boys. Girls. Turkeys. Thanksgiving. Potatoes. Family. Fat. Football. Pig. Mikey. Fat. Woods. Tree. Treehouse. We're all the way back. Back to the beginning. Oh, we did? Does he win? Hey, you win. This is so weird. All right. This is what you call it in the biz. Boardroom. Keeper. Keeper. It worked out well. I thought it might have been a boardroom idea. I think it's a keeper. We're going to do it?

2:14:28Are we? I don't know. I don't know. I liked it. I'll start. Go ahead. Deodorant. Chalk. Oh, Tums. Bad for you. That's a phrase. Bad. This game. Pepper. Four score and seven years ago, our country called. It's not. It's not phrase association. She keeps lubing up his hands with antibacterial as we play this game. Brilliant. Okay. I want to ask the listeners, though. Maybe they're digging it. 570-1949. Well, we've pulled it off seamlessly. Let me try again. Okay, try it again. One more time. Toothpaste. First thing that comes to your mind. Let's get that in our hand. First thing that comes to our mind. Don't think about it. First thing that comes to your mind. Decay. Dentist. Dentist? Dentist. Doctor. Lady. Lawyer.

2:15:33Attorney. Court. Trouble. Hurt. Sadness. Fear. Anger. Love. Hate. Heart. Mansion. Scary. Hanging. Rope. Tease. Boobies. Wieners. I know. It got weird. It got weird. Tease. Three minutes. I threw the word mansion out. for no reason, and no one noticed. Oh. And no one noticed. Everybody just went with it. Yeah. Yeah. We're all weirdos. It's a lot of pressure to keep it going. I know. See? Why did you say boobies? Because he said tease. I said tease? You did say tease, but I thought you meant like a... You're a tease. I'm teasing you. I did. Well, tease. I thought you meant like, you know, obviously, Mike. Like a nice set of... M1.

2:16:38Jose from Spring Valley. Doing great. We've been better. Okay, you guys are doing a lot better than me then after listening to this. Thank you. Thank you very much. I thought you guys were going to refer to the Mike Tyson bit. Tyson teams? Tyson teams? She's doing haikus too. M1 Oside from Oside. Blame. Stupid. Change the radio station. Thank you. Thank you. Wow, that was a little harsh, but appreciate your honesty. Yes. Minus the appreciate. The worst. That is Jay's idea. Now somebody on Facebook blamed Jay for something. For once. Finally, somebody on Facebook said, I'm not jumping on this bandwagon. Yes. This replaces Tyson Tunes as the worst bit. Word association. There's no question.

2:17:34He's searching for texts that validate him. He wants one text. Squinting at the computer screen. That says it was a good idea. Best game in a while. Who came up with the word association bit? There's a good one. No, there's no one bad, though, too. What's association? Please stop playing this game. Jay, I would rather share a toothbrush with Woods. Yep. than play bird association again. Man, don't do that. You would, Woods. What? You would share a toothbrush. Yeah, I'm not Sally. He would have to brush his teeth in order to have a toothbrush. Fair enough. You, though, I think, feel that if you're friends with somebody, you can do stuff. Yeah, we're friends. There are certain things that you can't share. Can't share deodorant? Sure you can.

2:18:38Absolutely. Yeah, no problem. You guys ever share with a wife? You don't share with a wife? Never. Oh, yeah, my wife and I. I'll share with a significant other. Well, right. No. You're unmarried. Yes, exactly. And the reason I won't is because you have yours, and it's a very personal item. It's not a tampon or anything. It's just deodorant. Oh, wow. No, but it's just as personal. I wouldn't say deodorant. We stopped talking about that right away. Yeah, I do, too. It goes in your armpit. I understand. What if you run out and, Rebecca, your wife has some? No, never. You'll go to the store? I'll go to the store. Oh, my goodness. What if it's first thing in the morning? No. But you'll tongue kiss her. Yeah, yes. That's a personal thing. Yes. But deodorant is so, it's somebody else's. It's for their underarm. I wouldn't make a habit of it, but I'd do it. Of course. Well, think about all the stuff that goes in her mouth, though. I mean. She brushes her teeth. Oh, my God. Yeah, she washes her armpits. Usually they've just been freshly washed. It's mental. And that she's a woman. Yeah. It's mental. Would you rather share deodorant or toothbrush? Nothing. I don't want... Hey, listen. I would rather Rebecca not use my toothpaste. There's two toothpastes. Yeah. There's two toothpastes. She's got her toothpaste. I got my toothpaste. We share one. Why the toothpaste? Because she likes a certain kind and I like a certain kind. And she'll use mine.

2:20:02I think because she just wants to feel close. Like, oh, he's my husband. I'll use his toothpaste. And I'm like, it's my toothpaste. Just, you know, we can have our own stuff. You got your toothpaste. I got my toothpaste. And then my toothpaste run out. You need to share. To me, it's more about like, hey, listen, it's okay to spend the $2 on the toothpaste. You like that brand. I like this brand. We know which brand. You use it. You got deodorant. Use your deodorant. Underwear. Never. Yeah. You would give a fresh pair of underwear to someone. Yeah, any of you guys. Boxers. Okay, wait, wait, wait, though. Or briefs. I don't want to wear briefs. I'm not a pervert. If you gave, what about boxer briefs? Perverted? Yeah, it's creepy. It's very creepy, very perverted. Boxer briefs? You wear boxers? Yes. That's not perverted. Or nothing at all.

2:21:00Like today. That's a sex pervert. Yeah, you're a sex pervert. You drive a van and they don't want you 300 feet from a church or a school. Now, these jeans aren't suitable for boxers, so I just go commando. Why are you wearing skinny jeans? They're not skinny jeans. In fact, they're flared. They seem tight at the ankle. Yeah, and they're black and bunched up. And you've got on mascara. All of his jeans seem tight. If I lent a pair of underwear to somebody, It's theirs now. Yeah. Are you kidding me? I would wash it and give it back to you. He wouldn't take it. He'd throw it away. That is hideous. Crazy person. That's hideous. Wash it in hot water. Don't. Give it back to me. You ever buy anything at a vintage store? Yeah. No. You know why? Because it touched people's stuff. It's washed. Detergent. Yeah, it's borderline crazy. I wouldn't buy underwear because that's, you know, it's a little more intimate. I wouldn't buy a jacket.

2:22:11Really? What? It's haunted. I don't know if it's haunted. Could be haunted. I don't know who was wearing that. Could be some dude that got it with an axe. I don't know. I like the clothes. I like the vintage clothes. Yeah. Great. Buy them from... American Eagle. They're not vintage. Yeah. They're not made the way they used to be. They look like vintage. But they're not the same. But they're not made the same. You wash them four times. So all homeless people are haunted is what you're saying. You hate homeless people. Oh, wow. No. Because they're wearing old used clothes. No. Some of those old used clothes are ones that I've donated. What about a Bible, Mike? Could you use somebody else's Bible? I bet you would. Wouldn't you? Might. Yeah, wouldn't you, Mike? I bet you'd take a used Bible, wouldn't you? Take that sucker. Real good. That don't have to be new. In fact, Mike, I bet you'd take a pastor's outfit. As long as he's a pastor, you're going to wear it, Deacon. Right? Would you wear Jesus' loincloth if I got it for you? That'd be perfect, wouldn't it, Mike? You want to be him, after all. Just wear his stuff. You're God. That's right, Mike.

2:23:27You just can't get enough of that Jesus stuff, can you? I bought it on eBay. I'm just sitting on it. I'm literally sitting on it. Sitting on it. I'm waiting. I know you'll find it eventually. And then I'll go on there and pretend I'm somebody else and I'll bid you. Just keep bidding the price right up, Mike. I've done that before, too. You're so stupid. You are so stupid. You'll do it. You couldn't even figure it out. You couldn't figure your way out of a paper bag. Unless there's a burrito at the bottom. Then you could. Or at the top. I don't want anybody to freak out when I say this. Because there's going to be people that freak out. Isn't that what you think? We're going to play grab Wood's junk. And we're going to have Lauren reach into Wood's pants. Hang on. Hang on. Best bit ever. Hang on.

2:24:58Oh, it's Hillary with some shows for you to go check out. This Friday night, go see Lady Tron at House of Blues or Head of the Belly Up for the Mother Hips. Saturday night, FM 94.9 presents TV on the radio and Arctic Monkeys at the Open Air Theater. Next week, you can see Bush at 4th and Beyond the 27th, Portugal the Man at House of Blues on the 30th, or Peter Bjorn and John at the Belly Up, also on the 30th. Blink-182, play cricket wireless October 6th, and you can see Blitz and Trapper with Dawes at the Belly Up October 9th. October 10th, an FM 94.9 about the music show. The Pains of Being Pure at Heart will play the belly up for only six bucks. And still to come, Ryan Adams, Manchester Orchestra, Boxer Rebellion, City in Color, Black Joe Lewis and the Honey Bears. Also, Morrissey, Peter Murphy with She Runs Revenge and Dinosaur Jr. So there you have it. Get out there and see some shows. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 concert calendar online at FM949SD.com. ABC Tonight. It's the call you've been waiting for. Hello, angels. Hello, Charlie. From executive producer Drew Barrymore. We're angels, not saints. The season premiere of Charlie's Angels. And the two-hour Grey's Anatomy season premiere. You're no longer a doctor at Seattle Grey's. I got fired. What did you think was going to happen? The premieres of ABC's Charlie's Angels and Grey's Anatomy. It all starts tonight at 8 on ABC 10.

2:26:26There's a new news leader in San Diego. 10 News. More people have made the switch. choosing the best coverage of major news with more reporters covering the important stories from your neighborhood and choosing to save time with the convenience of 10 minutes of nonstop news. More San Diegans have made the switch, making 10 News the number one choice for news in the evening. Whether you watch at 5, 6, or 7, when you want news, turn to 10 News, San Diego's News Source. Hey, gang. Hi. Hi, it's Rol Pals Woodsy and L.O.B. Hello. How are you, L.O.B.? Great. How are you? Seeing real clear or what? Oh, I can see phenomenally. How? How? How? Well, yesterday I watched something in HD, and I was trying to figure out if I just never got HD before or I actually couldn't see it because I used to have horrible vision. Now, guess what I have? 2015. Yep. Yep, me too. Me and LOB went to Clearview Eye and Laser Medical Center, and it's not often when you go in for a surgery, a 10, 15-minute surgery.

2:27:32that your entire life changes after you get that surgery. Literally, life-changing. Right. And LOB and I both went to Clearview. We met with Dr. Sandy T. Feldman and her staff. And you can do the same, and you should do the same, and all you have to do to get a free consultation is call them. 858-452. 3937. LOB, is there another way that they can... Yeah, you can actually go online at www.clearvieweyes.com and sign up for that free consultation. They're really thorough and they're going to make sure that you're taken care of. Absolutely. And you tell them that your old pals LOB and Woodsy sent you. See ya. It's never an easy decision. But when the passion is gone and things have become boring and predictable, the answer will be crystal clear. We're all grown-ups here. You know when it's time to move on. So go ahead. Test drive that new BMW 328i sedan you've had your eye on. The timing is perfect. Right now, BMW is offering a $1,000 credit on the 2011 328i sedan, along with attractive lease and finance offers, but only for a limited time. And as you build those strong bonds on the open road with your ultimate driving machine, you won't be weighed down by the baggage of any maintenance costs for four years or 50,000 miles.

2:28:48Hurry into a BMW center today for a test drive. The chemistry will be immediate. For no-cost maintenance details, call 1-888-311-4BMW. For a limited time, lease the BMW 528i sedan for $4.99 a month. Visit sdcountybmw.com slash finance for details. Sometimes life kind of feels like, well, a juggling act. Fortunately, Cricket Wireless helps keep things in control with a cool smartphone like the Sanyo Zayo by Kyocera for under $100. And the best part is Cricket's great unlimited plan with talk, text, and data for only $55 a month, way less than those other guys, and an awesome price for a smartphone. The Zayo's perfect for keeping up with friends and family on Facebook, Google Maps to get around, and has access to tons of other apps. So do yourself a favor and get the Android-powered XIO for $99.99 with no contracts or hidden fees, plus unlimited talk, text, and data for just $55 a month. Visit a Cricut store or mycricut.com today.

2:29:47So smart, so Cricket. Limited time offer requires new activation. See store for details. Data usage is subject to Cricket's fair use policy. Coverage not available everywhere. Terms and restrictions apply. Get the Huawei Ascend 2 Android smartphone at Cricket for $99.99 after mail-in offer. Plus a great plan for only $55 a month with no contract. Visit a Cricket store today. Boar's Head Oven Gold Turkey Sandwiches are being stolen every day. To defend your sandwich, put yourself in the mind of the sandwich thief. Now. You open the fridge, and knowing everyone is off to the big meeting, you consider whose lunch you'll steal. There's a tub of Mindy's macaroni surprise, which you don't want to touch. There's a horrible-looking foot-long mess that's obviously subpar. Ah, there it is. A boy's head oven gold turkey sandwich. Turkey doesn't get any better than this. The best quality pure turkey without preservatives, without fillers, without ground-up. questionable things, and so you swipe the Boar's Head. Of course, knowing how desirable Boar's Head Oven Gold Turkey is, the sandwich owner may be ready for the thief. Gotcha! Oh, is this your sandwich? It looks exactly like mine. Nice try. Boar's Head Oven Gold Turkey. Compromise elsewhere. Try a slice of Boar's Head premium deli meats and cheeses in select supermarkets, gourmet stores, and fine eateries. To get your week running like clockwork, it's good to start with a plan.

2:31:13And the Vons Weekly ad is a great place to start. Our fantastic deals make shopping so much easier. You'll find delicious meal ideas plus stock-up prices on home essentials all in your weekly Vons ad. Shop Vons today to get these Vons Club specials. It's our mix-and-match event. You'll get 50 cents off each participating item when you buy eight or more items on top of great Vons Club prices. Mix-and-match items like eight packs of Gatorade for only $3.99 each, plus CRV selected varieties. General Mills Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Cheerios for just $1.89 each. And Dreyer's Ice Cream for only $2.99 each. Selected varieties. And it's easy to stay healthy this flu season when you get a flu shot at the Vons Pharmacy. No appointment necessary, and you'll get 10% off your groceries. Vons, ingredients for life. Age restrictions apply. See pharmacy for details. Coupon expires one week from issue. Other restrictions may apply. You guys ready for some Sunday football? Go to U31, North Park's number one bar and grill to hang out with me, Woodsy. Prizes awarded to those who can pick. FM 94.9 will host select 1 p.m. football games throughout the season. Check FM 94.9SD.com for details. With all the attention we gave to features in the new 2012 Dodge Charger, like over 60 standard and available safety and security features and standard Uconnect touchscreen.

2:32:28You might be wondering about the performance. Well, open the hood. That engine you see gives Charger an impressive 292 horses and best-in-class 31 miles per gallon highway with an available new 8-speed automatic to turn all that power into crisp forward motion. Now close the hood and wonder no more. The new Dodge Charger. Now get 0% APR financing or $2,000 cash allowance on 2011 Dodge Charger and Challenger. Visit your SoCal Dodge dealer. EPA estimated miles per gallon. Actual mileage varies. Wards vehicle segmentation. Financing for well-qualified buyers through Ally. Not all buyers will qualify. Residency restrictions apply. Offers end October 31, 2011. Dodge is a registered trademark of Chrysler Group, LLC.

2:33:19This report is brought to you by Kaiser Permanente. It does what no pill, no procedure can to keep you young. Play Kaiser Permanente. Remind you, make it part of your day. The truth is the day you stop playing is the day you start aging. Learn more at kp.org slash thrive. Five southbound after Carmel Valley Road. There's a traffic cone. It's rolling around in the middle of lanes. Also in La Mesa, the eight westbound before Jackson Drive, an accident. It's got the right lane blocked. It's a multi-vehicle crash. Three cars involved in that one. And the five southbound at Mesa. Main Street an accident, they moved it to the right shoulder of that off-ramp. This report also brought to you by REMAX. Knowledge is equity. Talk to a REMAX agent today. Discuss your options. REMAX. Outstanding agents. Outstanding results. Find an agent at REMAX.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. I'm going to open my beer right as we start. I hope I like the warm-up back on FM 94.9. CreateYourDesignOnline.com is our friend Jared, and he's incredible. He does, and he's going to be here, by the way, for Mikey-thon, October 6th and 7th, camped out, updating our website. He does the most amazing website design. If you're looking for anything graphic design, CreateYourDesignOnline.com.

2:34:53Grab what's junk in just a minute. I got to hear a ram jam. So if you're just tuning in, you may have missed the word association game. Premiere. And probably finale. Yes. It was both the season premiere and the series finale all in one shot. You guys. Just want to give it a chance. On our Facebook page right now. For the first time ever in the history of Jason R. Isbell, he is getting slammed. He will never admit it to you, but I'm sure it bothers him. You don't know me at all then. He came up with the word association game and his J-pack. I don't know what he calls his fans. His J-zers. His J-z's. His J-z's. His J-z's. His J-birds.

2:36:32It's Jaybirds. It's Jaybirds. My flock. His flock. His flock turned on him, and they said we didn't like word association. They just don't understand it. So I am guaranteed to get a call later today that sounds like this. Hello? How you doing? Good. Is this Jay? You know who it is. You know full well who it is. You got a minute? Yeah. What's going on? Yeah, what's going on is I'd like to talk about the show today. Sure, yeah. It was a great show. I thought it was a good show. Oh, did you, Mike? You did, huh? I thought it was a good show. Just thought it was a funny show. No, it wasn't funny. What are you talking about, Jay? You know what I'm talking about, Tubby? Are you angry, Jay? You sound mad. I ain't mad.

2:38:14Listen to me, all right? You didn't give a bit of a chance, all right? You threw it. You threw it. You threw it. You threw it. You threw it. I what, Jay? You threw it. Are you saying I... You know what I'm saying! I didn't throw it. Any special attention. You didn't treat it like it was the book of Elijah. You didn't treat it like, you know... Jay, there's no book of Elijah. Whatever, Mac. You know what I mean. Whatever it is. You know what I'm talking about. Actually, Jay, I don't. I thought that the bit didn't go well, but that wasn't anybody's fault. Oh, wasn't it, Mac? Wasn't it my fault? Wasn't it Jay's fault? Now my flock's gone. Done killed my flock. Now they only 99% love me. Well, I'm sorry. We'll try it again. Oh, no. We ain't trying again. You ruined it. You ruined it. You ruined everything. You ruined it.

2:39:20everything, don't you? You can't quit. You do a great job. You're the most popular character on the show. You can't quit. I'm going to form my own show, call it The Show. Don't make those jokes anymore, Jay. Why not? Because they hurt. Whatever. Jay, that is not nice. All right, fine. But I still quit. I won't form a show called The Show, but I'm quitting. And I'm taking L.O.B. and Woods. Jay, don't do that because that's exactly like the thing. And what about Chris? I ain't taking Chris. You know I ain't taking Chris. You can have Chris. You can keep Chris. Call the Mike and Chris show. Why don't you go ahead? Two goody two-shoes. Just sitting in the street. Right? Two couple good guys, right? Just ruining bits.

2:40:20Taking plays off. Give that bit of chime, Mike. Yeah. You did cut it kind of short. You cut it short, Mike. You didn't give it a shot. Word association. Let's try it right now. Fine, Jay. I'll do it. All right. Bird. Sorry. Nest. Bird and nest. See, Jay? You shut up. I'm out of here. And I quit. Wow. I'm done, Mike. I'm freaking done. You're a nap. And you're a ball dropper. And you're a nap. You're a nap. You're a nap. You're a nap. You're a nap. You're a nap. You're a ball dropper. 100%. I love that guy. 100%. Identical J. Identical J. Later. About 4 o'clock. Thanks a lot, Mike. I had some time to stew on it. And I talked to Kim. And I talked to Liberty.

2:41:24Is that Jasper? That's my favorite new thing. Hang on a second. Somebody's calling. Hello? Wait, wait, wait. Hello? Is this Mike? Yeah, it is. Yeah, this is Jasper. I know. Oh, Jasper? Hey, what's up? Yeah, this is Jasper. I'm Jason. I know. You've never called before. Well, I'm furious. And my daddy is in tears. He's been reduced to tears. And all he keeps saying is that mama won't even make love to him. That's impossible. First of all, that's impossible. Because he lost all his fans. Can I talk to him? Yeah, hold on. Daddy! Hello? Hello, Jay. Hi, Mac. What's going on? Why are you mad at me? You threw my bit. I didn't throw it. You know, if Wood came in with an idea and he wanted to try it, I bet you'd give it a fair shake. A real fair shake.

2:42:16How did I not give it a fair shake? All right, Mike, you didn't give it any gusto. I gave it gusto. Hey, next time I come in with a bit, why don't you pretend like it's a burrito and it's the same figure that you do that burrito, Mike? It'd be a hit, all right, because we'd be number one. If you take my bit with the same figure and gusto that you do, when there's a damn dentist tray in front of you, we'd be number one. Trust me. Why do you always have to make fun of my weight? Fine, your religion. With the same vigor that you tap prayer with my hair, we'd be number one, Mike. Jay, listen to me. Yeah, talk to my wife. Wait a minute. She got some things to say to you. Hello? Hello? This is still Jay. Jay? Yes? What can I do to make it better? You can start by not existing.

2:43:22I what? You start by not existing, Mike. I could start by not existing? Yeah. Say it. Don't spray it. I don't know. How do I do that? How do I cease to exist? I'd have to die. Fine. Whatever you got to do. But that isn't good. I mean, I don't want to die. I just... You don't got to want it. Just do it. Listen, we'll try word association again tomorrow. No, you listen to me. You listen good. We're going to do that bit. And this time, you better, you better. Listen, listen, Jay, let me reason with you. You're angry, and I know you're angry. Okay, listen, listen. What? I went on the Facebook page. People didn't like the bit. I don't know what you want me to do. You know what you did on Facebook? No, but I think it's an indication that they didn't. You just go to Facebook. Oh, yeah, let's take all my ideas from Facebook. Oh, let's just put up lists, and who likes this, and who likes that? Great idea, Mike. Listen, Jay.

2:44:25I'm trying to reason with you. I've been in radio longer than you. I know that. Yes, you have. Maybe I know a thing or two. You're 77 years old. They love me. What part of love don't you understand? I understand the whole thing. All right. Thank you, Jay. You're getting insulting. Thank me. You're getting insulting again. Thank me, Mike. All right. Thank you. Thank you, Jay. Thank you, Jay. I quit. Darn. Boy, he's on one. He's really on one today. Really? Oh, J.S.F.R. All right. Do we have time for Grabwood's Junk? We have, yeah. We do. All right. Here's how we're going to do this. Here's how we're going to do this. You call right now. You get one question and a guess. You have to guess what's in Woods' pants. Okay?

2:45:28570-1949. You're going to guess what is in Woods' pants. Now, we're blindfolding L.O.B. And what we've got is a pair of Woods' pants, and we're going to put something inside of the pants. L.O.B. is being blindfolded right now. She will not know what is in his pants. And then she will have to reach into his pants and tell us what it is. Now, you get to take a guess. And then after you ask a question about it, you can ask, is it cold? Is it round? You can ask one question, and then you have to guess what it is. All right? So one question and a guess. All right. And, Jay, what is the prize? What are they playing for? Today they're playing for a pair of tickets to see Queensryche.

2:46:24September 19th at the House of Blues. What about Queensryche? Isn't that what I said? All right. That's an isolate, L.O.B. It's hard, though, because it was music. What band is it? And I have a blindfold on. Queensrychechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechechecheche Okay. She's reaching in, and she's touching it. Wow. Is there a mic near me? Yes, there is a mic right in front of you. Okay. And she is reaching in, and you get to ask a question, and then you get to take a guess. Then you get to take a guess, Zack of Lantern. Her hands are freezing. She can't say what it is. All right, thank you. I would like to ask, does it feel round? If it's what? Does it feel round? It is round in a way. Guess? My guess is a can of Copenhagen. That is incorrect. Sorry, that is incorrect. Oh, there just keeps being more to it. M1P2 from San Diego. Are you there? Eventually, we'll make you M1. You get a question and then a guess. It is bigger than a caterpillar. You know that. If you're just tuning in, we're playing... Oh, wow. If you're just tuning in...

2:47:58Does that feel weird, L.O.B.? Yeah, there's slime on my hand. Okay. You're just tuning in. Oh, gosh. We're playing Grab Woods Junk. Yes. And we're filming it. And when you see, it's not what you think, L.O.B. has her hands in Woods' pants. Not the first time, Mike. So you've asked your question, and now you get a guess. It is not a pair of scissors. Nope. Remember to listen to all the clues. Listen to all the clues. And, Jay, you've got to be ready with the get and the correct buzzer because I can't play that. Oh, my gosh. What is it? M1, Amy from Encinitas, or Robert from Vista. Sorry. Yeah, this is Robert. Okay, you get a question, and then you get a guess. Is it crunchy? It is not crunchy. Oh, okay. Is it? Oh, I'm going to get one question. I can't ask if it's long or short. Mm-mm. Yeah, you can ask that. Go ahead. Okay. Is it long or short? As a basis. What's the basis? Is it short? Well, she didn't know what a basis. You got to give her a point of reference. Is it as long as a zucchini? No. No. So it's shorter than a zucchini. Wow. It's shorter than a zucchini. Take a guess. A banana. Yeah. Oh, no. It is not a banana. I wish it were a banana. It's... M1 Jamie from Encinitas. Go ahead. Is it soft?

2:49:38Well, you could say the outside of it is like cold and hard. And then on the inside, when you poke it, it's it's like soft and gooey. Take a guess. It is not a pair. It is not a pair. M1 Surf Daddy at Swami's. Yeah, man. Take a guess. First, ask a question. You get a question. Yeah, I'm thinking. So she said it's soft. She said it was round. Shorter than a zucchini. Yeah. Hard on the outside. Hard on the outside. And can I give one clue? Yeah. It's cold. It's cold on the outside? It's cold on the outside and the inside. The outside is hard and the inside is what? It's soft and gooey. Soft and gooey.

2:50:34How specific do we have to be? I want to go with something kind of like a donut, but I don't know if it's like an eclair with filling. That is not bad, but that is not what it is. That is not what it is. M1, Pete from San Diego, you get a question and a guess. Is it shaped like a chapstick? Yes, but if the chapstick were about 20 times the size. So it is a cylinder. That's right. Yes. Oh, boy. It is not his pinball. Oh, my God. Oh, for a second, she was so afraid. I just took my hand. Ew. Because her hands are in it. She's blindfolded. She doesn't know what her hands are in. M1, Brian from Poway. Are you there? Yes, I am. Question and a guess. No. It is not a pickle. M1, O'Reilly from San Diego. Hi. Is it a candy bar?

2:51:40It is not a candy bar. M1 Scott from PB. It is not a push-up. Not a bad guess. It's a good guess, but it is not a push-up. M1 Starla from San Diego, question and a guess. Edible. Yes. Oh, boy. Yes, it is. It is not an egg, but we're getting closer. Oh, boy. M1 Monkey. Oops, sorry. M1 Monkey, are you there? Sorry, M1 Monkey, you get a question and a guess. No. There's something gooey, but it's not. It's hard on the outside. It's soft and gooey. It's soft and gooey on the inside. It's not a donut. It's not a donut of any kind. That was already asked. It's not a donut. M1 Brian, or sorry, Breanne? Yeah. Breanne from San Diego. Do you have a question and a guess? Okay. The outside, is it a thin outside? Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Okay.

2:52:50I think I know what it is. What is it? A can of, like, orange juice concentrate. It is not. Great guess. Great guess. That is not it. It's similar to that, though. It's got to be. M1 Redbeard from San Diego. Do you have a question and a guess? Yes. Is it three inches long? It is about three inches long. Is it? Yes. Is it a Twinkie? Ooh, good guess and incorrect. I'd say it's probably about the same. Height and maybe, it's bigger girth than a Twinkie. Damn right. M1 Chad from San Diego. Lauren has her hands in Woods pants. It's not what you think. Isn't it? And we're playing Grab Woods Junk. Do you have a question and a guess? So I heard that it's not a Twinkie. I'm saying it's not a push-up bar. Does it have a stick in it? A stick. No stick. No stick. But you get a guess. Because I was going to say a 50-50 bar. However, maybe about a ding-dong. It is not a ding-dong or a 50-50 bar. It's harder than the foods that people keep naming. It's harder on the outside. Yes, on the outside. And on the inside, it's all gooey and lumpy. Got it. M1, Andy from Oceanside.

2:54:17Is it yogurt? Bam! That's it! It's yogurt! It is. Go ahead and take her. Help her take off her. My hands are covered in yogurt. Help her take off her. Oh, that's not bad. I thought it was going to be way worse. L.O.B.'s hands are covered in yogurt. Yep. And she reached into the thing. It's just a regular yogurt canister with yogurt inside of it. And the questions and the clues will lead you to what it is. Jay, tell them what he won. He won a pair of tickets to see Queens Rite. September 19th to the House of Blues. There you go. Hang on the line. Thank you. Hang on the line. Thank you. I don't hear it. Thank you. Thank you. Going to see Queens Rite. That's Queens Rite. He doesn't hear it. That's the best when he doesn't hear it. He doesn't know when he does it. Ella B., you can now go wash your hands. I didn't put my pinkies in it. Wait till I tell you what our government was charging $16 for. And it was on our bill. And the Obama administration just found out about it, which I don't blame them. It's an oversight. But when you find out about it, you're going to go, oh, my. And we'll tell you all about it.

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3:00:04September still means summer in Southern California. That means more time with friends, more fun, more parties, and nothing makes a get-together legendary like the smooth taste of Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila. Serve it at your next party as an ice-cold shot or enjoy a fantastic Cuervo Silver Margarita and experience a taste so smooth it shatters expectations. Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila. Stay smooth. Drink responsibly. Jose Cuervo Especial Tequila. 40% alcohol by volume. Copyright 2011. Imported and bottled by Three Blind. Norwalk, Connecticut. Under licensed from the trademark owner. Jose Cuervo Especial is a registered trademark of Tequila. Mini wants to make a manual out of you, so you can experience the purest form of motor exhilaration. Sure, it might take some practice, but with the guidance of motoring advisors, you'll not only get the hang of the stick, you'll be running through the gears like a rally champ in no time flat. And with the lower starting price and great MPG, it will add some serious savings to the most entertaining car you'll ever drive. Stop by Mini of SDCounty.com and sign up for a test drive today. This is Radio Burger King, the sound of value and flavor. Thank you. Two simple words that we just don't hear enough. Well, Burger King is saying thank you by giving you a cool, creamy soft serve cone or cup with the purchase of a value meal. That's a free soft serve, and all you have to do is enjoy a value meal. Is anybody else giving you something free right now? Well, then go to Burger King and get your soft serve. This is Radio BK.

3:01:27Price and participation vary. Limited time offer not valid during breakfast hours while supplies last. What's your perfect cup of joe? Does it have a splash of French vanilla? Or is your secret high-voltage java straight up? Together, we'll go far. Wells Fargo Bank, N.A., member FDIC. September still means summer in Southern California. That means more time with friends, more fun, more parties, and nothing makes a get-together legendary like the smooth taste of Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila. Serve it at your next party as an ice-cold shot or enjoy a fantastic Cuervo Silver Margarita and experience a taste so smooth it shatters expectations. Jose Cuervo Silver Tequila. Stay smooth. Drink responsibly. Jose Cuervo Especial Tequila. 40% alcohol by volume. Copyright 2011. Imported and bottled by through blind. Norwalk, Connecticut. Under licensed from the trademark owner. Jose Cuervo Especial is a registered trademark of tequila. Mini wants to make a manual out of you, so you can experience the purest form of motor exhilaration. Sure, it might take some practice, but with the guidance of motoring advisors, you'll not only get the hang of the stick, you'll be running through the gears like a rally champ in no time flat. And with the lower starting price and great MPG, it will add some serious savings to the most entertaining car you'll ever drive. Stop by Mini of SDCounty.com and sign up for a test drive today.

3:02:40This is Radio Burger King, the sound of value and flavor. Thank you. Two simple words that we just don't hear enough. Well, Burger King is saying thank you by giving you a cool, creamy soft serve cone or cup with the purchase of a value meal. That's a free soft serve, and all you have to do is enjoy a value meal. Is anybody else giving you something free right now? Well, then go to Burger King and get your soft serve. This is Radio BK. Price and participation vary. Limited time offer not valid during breakfast hours while supplies last. What's your perfect cup of joe? Does it have a splash of French vanilla? Or is your secret high-voltage java straight up? Hey, how'd you know? With countless flavor options from cappuccinos to sweeteners, you can go wild and create exactly what you're secretly craving. Where's Mike? At a.m. p.m., when you buy three cups, you'll get the fourth on us. It's like E. Have it all and then some. A.m. p.m. Too much good stuff. At participating stores for a limited time while supplies last. See store for details. We know you want ultimate performance. So now BMW Encinitas is making it easier to drive a new BMW.

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3:04:50This report is brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners, your neighborhood Toyota dealer, has a $25 mail-in rebate for any True Start or True 2 battery installed. Why wait? Visit the experts today. See your participating Toyota dealer. On the 5 southbound at Main Street, there is an accident there. They've moved it over to the right shoulder. The 805 southbound before the 5, there's a disabled car. This one's in the middle lane. And the 15 southbound before the 56, you've got an accident sitting on that right shoulder. This report also brought to you by Del Taco. It's Thursday, taco night at Del Taco. Coming now for three chicken soft tacos, just 209. That's three chicken soft tacos for 209 every Thursday from 3 to 11 at participating Del Taco restaurants. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. KBZT San Diego. The Lincoln Financial Media Station. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I don't know the difference between odd and even. Lauren. If there's a movie with Meg Ryan in it, I'm like, I'm out. I'm out. Woods. I got one word for you, dude. Gift. And J. I stole from the Rolling Stones dressing room. I got this little coffin thing. I stole it from that. On FM 94.9. Melissa's in the studio right now. Hey, let's make some noise in our live studio audience.

3:06:35And she's really sweet. She's made blankets for all of our families. They're the best. They're great. They're really great. And what's the... Lullababes. What is it? Lullababes. Lullababes.com. And so she makes these blankets. Well, I said to her right now, hey, is it possible to kind of get with you and pay you, have you make a blanket, and I can kind of design it, tell you what I would want? And she goes, well, that's actually what I do. And Woods goes, you just, you want. Nacho chips on there? Just a hole right in the center so you can wear it like a poncho? Yeah. Well, you already have a poncho. That's true. Your poncho's actually right there. So you'd want to diversify. Yeah. Like a burrow cover? You could get a robe made out of a taco pattern. Oh. That'd be cool. Taco pattern? Why would I get a robe made of a taco? Because you want to wear stuff that makes you feel good? Tacos make you feel good. Enchiladas make you feel good. Okay. Just get hot sauce. Let me ask you this. Would you have a taco robe? No. You wouldn't. I would not. I would have like Yankees or something on mine. Why would I? Because you love tacos. You love them. Because you are Mexican. You're a Mexican. Mexican Americans don't like to just get into gang fights. They like flowers and music. I like it.

3:08:03You know what would actually be better? Yeah. You know what I'm thinking, Jay? I know what you're thinking. Like a Tommy Bahama robe. But I think that might be infringement on their logo. I know. Trademark. Just marlins and pina coladas all over. Palm trees, coconuts, parrots. Yeah, it would be like a Tampa Bay little logo. Because then you could be like, well, you know, if Tommy came up and said, like... Dude, why are you jocking my style? Why are you getting stuff made without coming to me first? You'd be like, it's not you, Tom. It's Tampa Bay. It's Tampa Bay. I don't know Tom. Don't? Oh, you call him Tommy. You just call him TB. TB. T. T-bone. Actually, T-R-B. Tommy R. Bahama. Tommy R. Bahama. Can I tell you how far I... Let me tell you how much I believe in Mikey-thon and raising money. for Rady Children's Hospital. It was suggested to me by a good friend, a guy named Leif that did some photographs for us. It was suggested to me that to raise money for charity, he do portraits of me. And Tommy Bahama stuff. Oh my God. A whole shoot. With a full coconut drink.

3:09:30Sitting in a Tommy Bahama chair. Oh, my head just exploded. Can I tell you, it gets so much worse, dude. It can't get worse. And I'm not kidding you. When he suggested, he'll tell you. It took me, and this is for my cause, autism, Rady Children's High, the whole, it took me two weeks to go, I want to. I mean, instantly in my head I thought, I want to. I mean, my heart, yes. I'm not going to, but I want to. Whatever helps. Because you wanted to dress up for your photo shoot. I don't want to just look like everyday Joe, everyday Mike. You see, if you're just tuning in, I don't wear Tommy Bahama. If you're just tuning in, he doesn't not wear Tommy Bahama. That's pretty much all he wears. He changes before the audience gets in. Right, he doesn't want to perpetuate the myth. But it's been made a joke. A legend. That I do, and I don't. And people send me funny pictures and texts. Daily. And, oh, look what I saw. It's a Tommy Bahama sale. And, oh, Mike, look. Look where I was in West Virginia. And they're in front of a Tommy Bahama store. And I look at it, and I just stare at my screen. I just stare at my screen. No smile. No smile. Just no emotion. I just look at it.

3:10:52And I move on and I think, you know, you got to ignore it or it won't stop. And it doesn't stop. So I told my wife about the idea and she said, you have to. You have to. So here's what said portrait is going to be. Leif does very, very, he can do very avant garde looking photos. So the shirt that I'm wearing is this. Very colorful, toucanned Tommy Bahama shirt. I like it. It looks nice. I'm not wearing it now. I don't have one. It's that one. Yeah. You want the same one? And the background is the same pattern. That's amazing. The background that I'm standing up against is the same pattern. So the shirt and the background, you can't tell almost where one starts and one begins. It's like you in your bedroom.

3:11:55It's like when you walk into your bedroom at home. Yeah, the palm trees blend in. Amazing. Yes, I'm doing that, and we're going to sell it. That's amazing. I'm in. That'll go. Yes. That'll go. I'm sure it will. I'm sure it will. Are you going to get Tommy to sign it as well? No. Thank you, Leif. That'll probably up the ante. Thank you, Leif, so much. Will you sign it, Mike? I won't smile. I will be deadpan. Yeah. not wanting to do it. In fact, it's on my calendar. He's taking these photos Saturday at 1.30, and I am dreading it. I don't want any, like, I want to get the shirt on, take the stupid picture. Are we done? Let me take it. No. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Why? Oh, yeah. Why? I'm coming. I'm getting audio. I'm doing the whole thing.

3:12:52Oh, gosh. I will be there depending on what time the Irish play. I will be there. It's at 1.30. Okay. Will they be playing? I think so. Oh, well. That's too bad. So there I'll be in my garage. Well, where else are you going to find that backdrop? You know what I mean? Your shrine. He doesn't have that backdrop just laying around, so they've got to do it in your garage. TB shrine. Candles all lit. I don't have. Coconut candles. Yep. I don't have Tommy Bahama backdrops in my garage. In your man cave. You just call them backdrops. It's wallpaper. So here was the deal. Oh, by the way, the girl that won a chance onto the M Factor. We did M Factor yesterday. And the girl that won, the girl that Woods liked that I didn't like, apparently was a good friend of ours' sister, H.M. Rojas. It was her sister. Oh, wow. Which I didn't know. Kid's got an eye for talent. Did you know that? No. You didn't? No. But you listened to it. I have an ear for talent. Did you know, Woods? No, I promise. Okay. Scott's on her. On your wife. Oh my gosh, you creep. Is that weird? That is weird. On your wife. So H.M. Rojas writes me and says, hey, my sister won yesterday. Right now I'm in, where is she? The Dominican Republic or something? She's in Costa Rica. Costa Rica. Close. Yeah.

3:14:20Gosh, you ever just racist, Mike? God, you're such a racist. I guess they all look the same to you, don't they? All brown. What are you speaking, Mexican? You know, Mike, you know, there are different countries. It's just not all Chile. So she says she's a good singer, too. She wants to try out next week. HM. HM. And I said, well, you're in... the Congo, and you have to actually be here to participate in this thing, because what we're doing is we're qualifying people that are good singers, and then, during Mikeethon, we're going to have three singers that compete against each other. And the winner will get something that we haven't determined yet, but something nice. I have a question. Yes. Are people that have already tried out, are they allowed to try out again? Sure, why not? They can try it again. But I'm going to be just as tough on them or Woods or L.O.B. My new bit's going to be I love everything. Yesterday I was honest and got booed and had Woods say, and there's your friend, Micah Spartan. So what we'll do is next week she'll be able to participate. I don't know if she'll win. She'll just be in it. Will she be in town for Mike Ethan? Yes. You're kidding. She's going to be here for Mike Ethan. Boom. And so she'll try out. And that'll be next week.

3:15:45Great news. The Justice Department was charging $16. Well, they were charging us $16 for their muffins. They had muffins that were $16 a pop, and we paid for it. You are kidding me. No, and they just found out. There's just waste money in our government. Yeah, they did. And now, I didn't get that peeved, okay? Because this is what I thought. I thought, first of all, President Obama doesn't go through the freaking muffin. The catering bill. No. He doesn't. But he's getting screamed at. It's his fault. Blah, blah, blah. And he doesn't know. Just like, you know, if it was George Bush, he wouldn't know. Presidents don't know stupid stuff like how much a muffin costs. However, there are people that are in charge of it that should know better. Fire them. Well, here's how I think it goes. I think and I could be wrong about this. By the way, the Justice Department's agency. Spent $121 million on conferences over the last two years. You ever hear of Skype? Well, here's the thing. And at these conferences, like I said, $16 muffins. I wonder what the hookers go for at those conferences. Time out. Hang on. Just let me offer this. If I'm wrong, you say, that's stupid. Somebody should be fired. But this is how I think it might work. They go to catering companies and they say, we're the government. We're doing a...

3:17:13What are you offering? And how much is it going to cost? And they say, how many you got? They say, we got 400 people. Or it's the Justice Department in Washington, D.C. We got 1,000 people. And they get a quote. And the quote says, yeah, for 1,000 people, it's going to be 25 grand. Okay? And then somebody else comes in and they go, oh, we'll do that for 20 grand. Somebody else comes in. And maybe it's actually the first quote is 100 grand. I don't know. But the lowest quote they get maybe is $25,000, and the next highest was $75,000. They're like, oh, it's a deal. You kidding? This is $25,000. It's great. We'll take you. What they don't do is they don't go through with a fine-tooth comb because the catering company goes, muffins, $16, napkins, $48. You know, it could. I don't know. Because how else would a muffin? be $16. Because nobody's paying attention to an itemized bill. Exactly. Nobody's paying attention. I put on big parties at hotels, and you have to, you go through and you itemize every, that's your job. You have to look at every single item. You're right. Yeah, I guess. Yeah, I guess you're right. It just, I think to myself, oh, and it says, we found the department spent $16 on each of the 250 muffins served.

3:18:36At the August 2009 legal conference in Washington. So it was 250 muffins. You know. You just call that a weekend. All right. Oh, boy. I can't escape it. I just cannot escape it. I knew it was coming. I knew when I said muffins. I kept waiting for the joke. Muffin top. Muffin man. What will it be? But I know he's got it. Just call it breakfast. All right. So I just added that up. 250 muffins at 16 bucks a piece is four grand. Okay? Now, here's the thing. Like I said, I bet it was a bill, and the bill said, and why would they have to look at the bill? They got a bunch of quotes. The cheapest one was $48,000. And they got to feed a whole bunch of people, and they're like, $48,000? That's not bad. I mean, it's cheaper than all the other quotes we got. And they put so many things on that bill. One of the things, and everything's expensive. As you're going through, it's like, you know, steak, $20,000. You know, everything's expensive.

3:19:36And then you start getting down in the smaller things. Four grand probably doesn't look too much compared to a $16,000 bill for leg of lamb. Yeah, but like Jay said, it should be someone's job to go down and look at the itemizing. Ask any bride, not myself because I'm not married, but anyone that's been there. You know what you're getting. What do you mean? You know what you're getting because you get a menu. Part of it is you're just a... throwing muffins out there, they're like, okay, what are we going to get? We're going to get bottomless coffee. We're going to get muffins. There's going to be... The only way I get it, man. Eclairs. There's going to be enchiladas. You know, and you know exactly how many you're going to get and you know what the price per head is. Topless quesadilla. Bottomless coffee. Naked juice. No, really, I like naked juice. I love it. I like a girl to serve me juice. Naked. Naked. You know that. That's all I'm saying, man. You don't have to get all... Butthurt about it. M1 Crystal has a possible explanation. Are you there, Crystal? I am. What do you think? I don't know if this is the case, but we just had a meeting for work, and everything was really expensive, but they market a lot because they don't charge you for the room, typically. So you have to hit a room minimum, and so you're paying, you know, $16 for a muffin, but then you're not paying for the room. So it kind of balances out. Maybe it did. Hmm, interesting.

3:21:03But I know that's a lot of our conferences. I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt. And it's Obama's in office. I'm still giving them the benefit. Well, you know, nobody rails against the hospitals for what they charge for $15 an aspirin. Oh, yeah. $50 a phone call. Yeah, they do. Well, you know, nobody freaks out about it. Doesn't do any good, though. Right, doesn't do any good. Don't Ask, Don't Tell is over. And this is what celebrities were saying about it. Lady Gaga tweeted and said, what a tremendous and beautiful day. Don't Ask, Don't Tell is officially repealed and the new order is in place. Sending all my love and gratitude to service members. Ellen DeGeneres, or as my father says, Ellen DeGenerate. Why? Because he's never heard the word DeGeneres. Right. It's not a word though, Mr. Esparza. It's a name. I know, but I'm familiar with the word DeGenerate. Okay. So it sounds similar. And so if it's similar, I'll say DeGenerate. Or Ellen Generous. Generous. I would say Ellen Generous. Ellen Generous. Ellen DeGenerous. He would say Ellen DeGeneres because generous is a word he's heard. Jay does the same thing. Queensryche. I don't know what ryche is, but I've heard the word right. So that sounds better. Queensryche. Queensryche. Yeah. That was good. I can't wait to hear that. I know what a raft is. I don't know what a raft is. Jay does. So that's a giraffe. That's a giraffe. A raft? Why? Because I know what a raft is. I've heard that word, raft. Raft? Yeah. Makes no sense. Giraffe. Clift.

3:22:30I've heard lift. Lift. I've heard the word lift. Yep. I've never heard it. Lift. Lift. Well, that doesn't make any sense. It's a clift. It's a continent combined. Fall off a clift. Yeah, fall off a clift. You're about to. Kathy Griffin. She said, don't ask, don't tell is officially over. We are a safer country with all our brave heroes having equality. George Takai said, it's nice to celebrate good news. Good news. Don't ask, don't tell is now history. Thanks to our LGBT soldiers for their brave service. Greatest voice. Jane Lynch, who I don't know. She's the teacher on Glee, and she just hosted the Emmys. She's also a lesbian. She's not even kind of lesbian, I heard. No, she is. She even said, I am. A big lesbian. She said a big lesbian. I'm not even kind of lesbian. You heard the clip right there. That's not her. That's Oprah. No, she said. I'm not even kind of lesbian. I'm confused. Oh, I am kind of. She said I'm kind of. Okay. I'm not lesbian. Yes, but you are. That was clear. I'm not even kind of lesbian. Okay. Wow. Make up your mind. I'm even kind of lesbian. You got to make your mind up because it doesn't sound. It sounds like you're bi-curious. Yeah. And Wanda Sykes said, congratulations. MF-er.

3:23:54That's right. So there it is. That is the deal. Let's see. This is great. I will ask this question. I will throw it out there and then you tell me. Have you ever ruined a wedding? Jay, we were talking about this yesterday in our meeting. He ruined a wedding with a photo. I didn't tell you what it is. Creep. L.O.B. has... A story that made us cringe. Have you ever ruined a wedding? What did you do? 570-1949. Make some noise in our live studio audience. Waiting on a traffic jam to finish, girl. Now's our chance. Let's do it. More from The Mikey Show coming up. Be a part of the show. I don't think it's that simple. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm beginning to like the sound of that.

3:25:07We've all seen how beautiful TV spokesmodels can sell just about anything in their high heels and slinky dresses, right? Well, Pacific Marine Credit Union hopes the same approach will work on radio. Okay, bring in the models. Can't wait. Wow. Wish you guys could see this. These models are almost as amazing as Pacific Marine's low auto loan rates. That's right, Howie. Pacific Marine Credit Union has an annual percentage rate as low as 2.5% for new, used, and refinanced vehicles. And Howie, that rate comes with a 72-month term for easy monthly payments. I'm pumped up because Pacific Marine offers up to 100% financing plus a 90-day payment deferral. Well, I'm 100% convinced that Pacific Marine has the hottest rates on heels. Wow, is it warm in here? Somebody better bring me some water. For complete details, go to pmcu.com. Or call 800-736-4500. Pacific Marine Credit Union. Open to everyone. Federally insured by the NCUA. AIS. They are doing a lot for you. And right now, with the economy the way that it is, it's the perfect time for you to take advantage of AIS. You're a student driver and you're a good driver. That's a good sign for you. It means discounts. So call AIS at 800-777-4AIS. Very easy way to remember the phone number. Or...

3:26:28If you want to dial them directly right now, 1-800-777-4247. That's the actual number to get a hold of them. But if you're a good driver, 20% off. If you are a good student, 20% off. If you have multiple policies like your auto and your house, 15% off. They're going to shop a dozen different companies for you, find the best rate for you. They did it for me. $1,600 a year. That's what I say by switching to AIS, and you should too. We're always looking for people to call us that have gotten on AIS and enjoyed it. They save money. I want to hear your story. Call me here at the radio station and tell me. I want to know. 800-777-4247. That's 800-777-4AIS. Good morning. Welcome to McDonald's. First good thing I've heard all day. But it's only 7.30 a.m. I know, and I already whacked my head, broke my phone, and got a parking ticket. So I'm going to need to order...

3:27:27I'm not done. But all of that is on the deluxe breakfast platter, and it's now just $3.99. Seriously? Set your mornings right with McDonald's deluxe breakfast platter. Three golden hotcakes, fluffy scrambled eggs, sizzling bacon, sausage, an English muffin, and more. All for just $3.99. The simple joy of every flavor of breakfast. Sorry you woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Technically, I fell out of bed and the window. Breakfast served during breakfast hours only. Price and participation may vary. McDonald's and SeaWorld have teamed up to give you a Halloween spooktacular discount. Adults in at kids price and kids are free at SeaWorld. Visit McDonald's today to get your exclusive SeaWorld coupon. Many locations now open 24 hours. TV on the radio. Arctic Monkeys. This Saturday night, open air theater at SDSU. TV on the radio's new album, Nine Types of Light, available now. Buy tickets now at livenation.com. Arctic Monkeys' new album, Suck It and See, available now. TV on the radio and Arctic Monkeys, live. Two of San Diego's favorites are back, football and Hondas.

3:28:50Honda production is at full speed, the cars are rolling in, and your Honda dealers of San Diego County are getting ready for a big fourth quarter. So if you've been waiting to drive a new Honda, your wait is over. All nine Honda dealers have a nice selection of models like Pilots, Accords, CRVs, and all new 2012 Civics. They've got plenty of cars and plenty of deals. To find a Honda dealer nearest you, visit sdhondadealers.com today. It's good to be back. Why, Ethel, I've never seen a bingo night like this. Ooh, check out Norman breakdancing. I didn't even know he could walk. Norman, go, Norman, go, go, go. What's gotten into everyone? I spiked the punch. With what? Frank's Red Hot. I put that s*** on everything. Frank's Red Hot sauce goes on anything. Its aged cayenne peppers add real flavor to tacos, pizza, wings, pasta, chicken, steaks, fries, sausage, chili, and it'll liven up any party. Frank's Red Hot sauce. I put that s*** on everything. On everything. The Padres' schedule is winding down, but the baseball season continues with exciting playoff action. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show is your source for expanded pennant race coverage and the best Chargers reporting anywhere in San Diego. And, of course, we've set up camp at Montezuma Mesa for exciting Aztecs action all season long. The Saquon Casino Post Game Show, weeknights at 10 beginning in October on Channel 4 San Diego.

3:30:07Baseball action continues exclusively on Channel 4 San Diego as the Padres host their series with the Dodgers, 630 Friday. From the scrapbooks to the clubhouse, go behind the headlines and sports pages and get to know the real people who don the Padres uniform. Join me, Jane Mitchell, on One on One, only on Channel 4 San Diego. There's a rumor that San Diego is home to one of the most brilliant, insightful, and educational culinary TV shows ever created. And then, there's my show. But it's big in taste and small in effort. Sam the Cooking Guy, Sundays at 5.30 and 7 p.m., only on Channel 4, San Diego. So I'm at Verizon, shopping for 4G. And I say to the sales guy, listen, I want Verizon 4G LTE speed, but I also want selection. And he goes, we've got a ton of advanced Verizon 4G LTE devices, like the new Droid Bionic by Motorola, the Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1, or the Mi54510L mobile hotspot that lets you connect up to five Wi-Fi-enabled devices. So I say, Smartphones, tablets, and hotspots. Not bad, but in my head I'm thinking. Is that the 10? The 5? Touchdown! And then I say, yeah, but is Verizon 4G LTE really that fast? And he says, yep, up to 10 times faster than 3G. Whoa. And now I'm going. They're going for two. Got it.

3:31:25Come to Verizon for the largest selection of 4G LTE devices and tear it up on the fastest, most advanced 4G network in America. Visit any Verizon store today, verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE, or call 1-800-256-4646. Verizon. Coverage details at verizonwireless.com slash 4G LTE. That's the sound of the Jeep celebration event. And just what are we celebrating? Well, Jeep Grand Cherokee is the most awarded SUV ever. And the 2012 Jeep Wrangler has an all-new powertrain with improved performance and fuel economy. With a refined, quiet interior and best-in-class maneuverability and ground clearance, it's the most capable Jeep Wrangler ever. And with some great deals, we expect a lot of sparks to fly. The Jeep Celebration Event, featuring the newest lineup of trail-rated SUVs. Now get 0% APR financing for 60 months or 1,000 cash allowance on the 2011 Jeep Wrangler and Wrangler Unlimited at your SoCal Jeep dealer. EPA estimated fuel economy 17 city and 21 highway for Wrangler two-door. Actual results may vary based on Ward's vehicle segmentation when properly equipped. 0% APR financing for 60 months equals $16.67 per month for 1,000 financed for well-qualified buyers regardless of down payment when financed through Ally. Not all buyers will qualify. Residency restrictions apply. Offers end 1031. Jeep is a registered trademark of Chrysler Group, LLC.

3:32:44Blue Shot is easy at the Vons Pharmacy. They give thousands of blue shots a year. No appointment necessary. Plus, you'll save 10% on your next grocery purchase. Vons, ingredients for life. Good morning. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. Don't really like to swim. Unlike most Latinos. Woods. I can put down a 20-pack of chicken nuggets. No problem. Lauren. I got a little pepper up my nose. Kind of sneezed. And Jake. No, I didn't cry. I'm a man. On FM 94.9. Let's make some noise in our live studio audience. Got a live studio audience in here every single day. And on Fridays, we do it for two hours from 8 to 10. Monday through Thursday from 9 to 10. So if you would like to get in on that action, just go to MikeyShow.com and you can get in. So have you ever ruined a wedding? How have you done it? 570-1949.

3:33:55That's the number you call us at and let us know how you ruined a wedding. Jay, tell your story of what you did. So it was one of these weddings where at the reception they put the cameras all over the table so they want you to take pictures. Well, I was in the bathroom and my buddy, so it's not technically my fault, came into the bathroom and said, hey, and I kind of turned just enough and he took a picture and then he went and mixed it back in with all the cameras on the table. And your junk was in the picture. So when he's sitting down with his wife and her family, they're all going through the pictures together. Everyone. The family. The whole family. Mom, dad. Grandma. Everybody. Grandma. There's Jay and little Jay. Oh, man. Jay and little Jay. Very little Jay. People have to know better that that's going to happen. Very little Jay. So he was never forgiven. Salt-pepper Serbian. Yeah. He was never forgiven, and their marriage lasted for about four years. Oh, wow. And it's your fault? Because of your junk in the picture? Well, I think it was a downward spiral. Way to go. Yeah, well, wieners cause all kinds of problems before. Ain't the first marriage that's broke up. My wiener has started and ended wars. That's right. Morn Cleopatra. I knew her and dated her. L-O-B. Yes. My story I told you guys yesterday while we were meeting.

3:35:12So my friend was at a big wedding, big, expensive, like 250 people, just gala. And they went, the bride and the groom and the catering people went into the little room to get the cake, to wheel the cake out for the cake cutting. And there was a giant chunk missing from this four-layered cake and then a trail of cake all the way over to another room. Where my drunk friend was passed out with throw up and cake all over himself. Guy was so drunk. He was so drunk that he walked up to the wedding cake. The wedding cake. And with his hand. Swiped like a claw mark. Down every layer. Down every layer. Down every layer. Oh my god. If you were a mom. And it was your daughter's wedding day. And your daughter came to you crying because your new son-in-law's best friend. Yeah, he was in the wedding party. Keep in mind, he had the maroon vest with the flowers sticking. Oh, gosh. Even I've never done that. And I am a lunatic, especially at open bar weddings. Dude, it takes a whole...

3:36:38different level of lunatic to be so blotto that you don't recognize that's a cake. Well, it's a wedding cake. You never did that in your worst day. And let me tell you, I was a drunken, drunk, blackout drunk. I knew better than to claw a wedding cake. That's one of the greatest ever told. Are they still friends? Yeah. Well, that's my question. Okay, so you sober up, all right? You wake up the next day, you're like... In the hotel. And it hits you. Mid-stretch. Zero recollection. No idea. He didn't know. He was blackout drunk. Blackout drunk. So somebody had to say, hey, you ruined the wedding. Hey, Dilhole, guess what you did? He passed out early, and everybody went out afterwards. I guess they took him up to his room. Somebody put him out. So he wakes up in the morning before everybody. Full tux. And he's like, yeah. Where's the wedding? And he's like, ready to, like, are you guys going down to that breakfast thing tomorrow? Or down to the breakfast thing this morning? And they're like, dude, do you know what you did?

3:37:50And he's like, no, what? Oh, did I sleep with that fat girl from the bridal party? I did, didn't I? No, that's not it. I didn't? Worse. Way worse than that. Are you kidding? Worse than that girl? You didn't sleep with a bride. You didn't sleep with anybody. You slept alone in your vomit. What'd I do? I threw up. Don't tell me I threw up at the wedding. You ate the cake. What cake? The wedding cake. Didn't everybody eat the wedding cake? I thought everybody had some. Did I throw up after I ate the wedding cake? Well, what you decided to do was before anybody got a piece and before the bride and groom got to cut it, you decided you were going to claw at it. No, I didn't do that. You did do that. It wasn't me. Well, there's vomit and frosting. Well, everybody had cake, and I might have gotten sick because I had too much to drink, but I didn't eat the cake before. It's under your fingernails, CSI. What do you see under your fingernails? White and orange. White and orange, yeah. White and orange. Colors of the... But I ate it with my hands. I didn't...

3:38:45No, no, no. You scratched it. You see, when you eat it with your hands, it doesn't get under your nails, CSI. So what happened? By the way, your new name is CSI. That's what everyone's going to call you for the rest of our lives because we found fingernails with frosting underneath them because you clawed at the cake. He's lucky that sober, he's one of the nicest guys you'll ever meet. Even though you're a nice guy, when you first encounter the bride after this moment, you walk up to each other. You know, maybe she's like, yeah, I know. It's the breakfast deal. Maybe he's like, I have to cry. I have to cry. You have to. He's like, I'm so sorry. Yes. Did he cry? He was like on the verge. Like his face had such sincerity and such like he knew he messed up and there was nothing like genuine faith. It'd be like, you know, Jay is like the nicest guy we know. It'd be like if he did it.

3:39:42and then the next day had to come. Jay is the nicest guy we've ever met. Off the air. I would say that he's probably the sweetest person that I've ever met. Oh, he's like a teddy bear. Like a hillbilly teddy bear. Very nice guy. Very happy. He's a really, really nice guy. What's there to learn from a guy like that? Yeah, a guy's been sending me fake $25,000 invoices to my mail. That's genius. From YFM. Genius. Maybe pay one of those. M1 Surf Daddy. M1 Daddy Surf Daily. Sorry, from Oceanside. Hi, guys. How we doing? Good, good. What did you do? So I was at my sister's wedding. It's been a few years now. And, you know, I tend to like to drink, you know, sometimes too much. And so I'm drinking everybody's champagne at the table. Been there. Yeah, I, like, sipped off everybody's. And my grandmother, and I love her to death, but she's been, you know, she's been a lesbian her whole life, you know, committed partner and all that. Your grandmother? My grandmother, who was sick. You don't hear a lot of lesbian grandmas. Yeah, she was sitting at the table, and the girls that were decorating the wedding were obviously lesbians, too, because they were all dressed up all cool. And after I got too drunk, I said, oh, my God, I'm surrounded by lesbians again, right in front of everybody. Oh, wow.

3:40:55Well, you knew they were lesbians because they were all dressed up cool. And it was the telltale sign. Telltale sign. Everybody knows that. Hey, listen. When a grandma's all cooled out, you know, you're like, lesbians. Thank you for the call. You ever ruined a wedding? You ruin your own, Mac, by being there. You showed up. I just showed up. You said I'd do. Poor Mama Jean. Rebecca's mama. When she said, hey, I'm engaged, did Mama Jean say, to who? Because in her wildest dreams, she couldn't imagine she's ever going to marry you. And then when she said, no, Mom, I'm marrying Mac. How long? Make some noise in our live studio audience. On FM 94.9.

3:42:04Rocktoberfest returns to the streets of North Park. FM 94.9 presents Rocktoberfest. Supported by Bex. October 22nd, 30th and University. Featuring Everest. Featuring Everest. The Soft Pack. Dead Feather Moon. The Style Tones. Low Volts. And Heavy Guilt. Get tickets at FM949SD.com for 15 bucks. Lots of German food. German beer. And other stuff that Germans make that would be appropriate for a party. Rocktoberfest. For tickets and more info, log on to FM949SD.com. New, youthful, innovative. Lots of words mean fresh. Add Mercedes-Benz to the list. That's because the 2011 lineup of Mercedes-Benz vehicles is the youngest and freshest in the luxury car class. Take the C300 sports sedan. A rare combination of luxurious refinement and racing pedigree, its agility control suspension lets it handle with precision even when driven hard. See your authorized Mercedes-Benz dealer about the 2011 C300 sports sedan, and you'll discover that for 125 years, Mercedes-Benz has also been synonymous with value. Lease the 2011 C300 sports sedan, an IIHS top safety pick, for just $349 a month for 33 months with $3,894 due at signing.

3:43:18Available only to qualified customers exclusively through Mercedes-Benz Financial Services and participating dealers through September 30, 2011. Call 1-800-FOR-MERCEDES for offer details. See your Mercedes-Benz dealer of San Diego County. Visit Hohen Motors in Carlsbad, Mercedes-Benz of Escondido, and Mercedes-Benz of San Diego. Hey gang, it's your old pal Woodsy once again for, well, it's quickly becoming the favorite restaurant for the Mikey Show Breakfast. It is Denny's. That would be three days in a row that we have feasted on Denny's. And I'm not ashamed of it because it's really, really good. And they've got a new menu that you need to check out. It's called the Let's Get Cheesy menu. They've got a new patty melt there where they actually put mac and cheese on the patty melt. It looks incredible. The new Cheese Please omelet. It's got all kinds of cheeses folded right into it. It's topped off with a cheese sauce. It's really, really good. The cheesy breakfast sampler we've all had this week. and probably will continue to have for weeks to come because we love Denny's, and we love the new Let's Get Cheesy menu. L.O.B. this morning almost ordered the country fried steak. It's the country fried steak and eggs. It's got a steak covered in pepper jack cheese sauce, served with hash browns, melted cheese on those. Listen, this thing is delicious. Get to Denny's right now and try the new Let's Get Cheesy menu. To get your week running like clockwork, it's good to start with a plan.

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3:49:08So smart, so Cricket. Limited time offer requires new activation. See store for details. Data usage is subject to Cricket's fair use policy. Coverage not available everywhere. Terms and restrictions apply. Get the Huawei Ascend 2 Android smartphone at Cricket for $99.99 after mail-in offer. Plus a great plan for only $55 a month with no contract. Visit a Cricket store today. I've never been so happy. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. It bothers me that I don't know how to be. Woods. That's why I don't eat that. funk cheese that you eat. I eat Kraft American singles. Lauren. My obsession with black men came from Bill Cosby. Did it? Yeah. And Jay. Man, if I could just be a home dad. On FM 94.9. Let's make some noise in our live studio audience. So one of the things that is big in the news right now is that the Chargers do want to build this stadium in the East Village down by... Well, down by where the Padres play right now. It would be an amazing facility. A beautiful facility. Here's the deal. The city says, well, you can do that, but we really do want to go forward with the San Diego Convention Center expansion. That's right. We have this giant convention center already where we do Comic-Con and we do all that stuff, but we want it to be bigger.

3:50:37And so, you know, we'd love to work with you, Chargers, but we just we want a bigger convention center. And in fact, there's a guy that is a member of the convention center board that said we need a larger facility, not not two facilities. In other words, we don't need those, you know, football or whatever it is that they play in that thing. We just we want a bigger we want a bigger convention center. So on Monday, Mark Fabiani, he's the big, he's the vice president of the Chargers. He's the Chargers attorney. And he told the Union Tribune that their architects that they've hired to put together what would be a stadium in downtown San Diego, he said, well, our architects were told that we need to incorporate convention space into our design.

3:51:37for a new $800 million home for the Chargers that we want to put in the East Village near Petco Park. And that would make the expansion necessary. It's pretty hard to do, you know. And as to a taxpayer, man, I just wish they would build the stadium. I really do. I wish they'd build the stadium. I think that it gives a city a sense of pride to have beautiful things in it. Yeah, and it's so good for the economy when a Super Bowl comes here and when college football wants to play bigger bowl games here. Absolutely. It's a win-win. It really revitalizes downtown San Diego. Now you've got a viable place that people want to – they're already starting to want to live down there. They already want to live down there. Yeah, they already do. But, I mean, there's still parts of the East Village, we have to admit, that are a dump. There's no doubt about it.

3:52:37You put in a stadium in an area that's already starting to come around, you're going to revitalize. But what you're also going to do is you're going to dot that skyline with beauty. You make your city more desirable. You make a sexy city sexier. And again, if it comes down to dollars and cents, I understand there are a lot of people that are about dollars and cents. If it comes down to dollars and cents, there's a lot of dollars that make sense in this deal. You're going to have a lot of people down there, and when you bring a Super Bowl to town, it brings in millions upon millions upon millions of dollars. Yep. How about they take my tax money and fix the roads first? Well, that's the thing. This is the bit about tax money. We don't see it. Right. We don't notice it. So we vote yes, and it's coming out of our tax dollars. So when you actually look at your paycheck and it – You don't really notice it. I do. Are you kidding me? Jay, show me a check stub before Petco. Show me a check stub after Petco. It is brutal. The amount of taxes they take out. It'd be great if we got check stubs here, but yes, it's brutal.

3:53:52Wow, that's passive-aggressive. That's minus the passive-aggressive. Well, if you use Internet Explorer. Yeah, but I'm on a Mac, so I'd have to be on a PC. Then you have to go get on a PC. Yeah. I'm just going to fill my timesheet out on paper. And when you print it out, there's no actual company logo on it, so it doesn't work when you try to go bring it a place that needs to see your pay stub. Yeah. Listen, guys, you know, you work with what you got. Hypothetically. Hypothetically. And honestly, I don't like football, so why am I paying for football to come to the city? Because it brings money. Well, yippee-io, it's money out of my pocket. Well, what about people that don't use the beaches, but they pay taxes for the beaches? I mean, there's a million people that don't surf in the city. What about people that don't have kids, like me and Wood, who pay for the schools? Clean up. Cleanup for any maintenance that goes into it? But the reason there's cleanup at the beach is because people are using the beach. Yeah, but what if I don't? You don't like football. It's trash. It's trash pickup. But they do coastal erosion things. I live in Mesa, so what do I care? $800 million. Cleanup for a beach. And a lot of times, I know that Surfrider and all these things are free beach cleanup. Okay. Great. It's volunteer. LLB actually made a good point.

3:55:00Shouldn't have kids. Why should you pay for schools? I don't know. I mean, clearly. Yeah, I don't have kids either. I have a part of education for all of our kids. But what do I care? I don't have any kids. But I don't have any kids. Why do I pay for schools? Jay, your argument makes sense. As long as you don't have an interest in it, why should you pay for it? Well, the bottom line is we all do. So you're comparing football to education. I get it. I get it. And he's right. That's a stretch. One is a necessity. Right. And one is a luxury. Blood sport. A luxury. What if I don't drive and I got to pay for the roads and all that? The freeway expansion? Who doesn't drive? You can't pick and choose what you pay taxes for based on what you use. You just can't. And my deal is, the bottom line, we're not really affected by the bottom line. It's the idea. And in the long run, it's going to be better for our city than worse. Yeah. Now, with that being said... I love football, and I love the Chargers, and I want to see them have a new home, and I want to go to it. However, I could make this argument for you. Comic-Con sells out in three days. Chargers might black out because they can't sell tickets. What brings in more money? Well, the bottom line is that Comic-Con puts on a great show, and they've got a great facility to do it. Listen, if we're sitting around and we're counting

3:56:21pennies and trying to cut corners. I'm looking at a... See, because a lot of people, this is their argument. We have a perfectly good stadium at Qualcomm, which, by the way, it's not. It should be called the Toilet Bowl. Didn't the Super Bowl say they would never come back? Never come back. They'll never come back. After we did the big expansion to get us to come here. Hey, dude, you're right. We didn't do it. But all you got to do is go to Qualcomm to know that Qualcomm's a toilet. It's a big cement toilet. And when you look at the new facilities and you compare the two, and you can't really give the cue such a hard time. She's old. She was built in the 70s. In the 70s, I bet she was a knockout, man. State of the art. State of the art. But now it is antiquated, old, ugly, worn down, and just a dump. Yeah, and I don't have any invention. any vested interest in a new convention center at all. But it brings a ton of money to this thing. Exactly. That's why I'm going to pay my taxes on it and just say, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just tell me what I need to do. Absolutely. They use it all year round. And that's the thing. Let's say that there was no... We weren't even talking about a stadium. Bottom line is that if they said they needed to expand the convention center, all right, great. The bottom line is I don't want to lose...

3:57:46A viable resource and something that means something to this community. Yeah, you can't lose the Chargers. And we kind of forget that. We kind of go, oh, it's a sport. You know, the Padres do mean something to a lot of us. And the Chargers do mean something to us. And I would hate to see, it would break my heart for them to become the city of industry Chargers. If I were on the board, though, this is why. This is the year people have to get out to the games. If I were on the board for that convention center, I'd be like, oh, people care so much that we can't sell out the stadium. And my answer to that would be, yes, Ms. O'Brien. The reason we can't sell it out is because it's a big cement turd. The reason we can't sell it out is because we don't have fans in this city, sir. We have fans, but we've got a turd. We have visitors. It's a vicious circle. We are a tourist community. They don't want to sit in a big toilet bowl. Tickets are too expensive. Who's going to go? They'll be more expensive. Tidy bowl, man? If you loved that team, you'd go sit in a field. You'd sit in a field, sir. I bet there's stadiums that are pits and there's fans in those cities and they sell out. I've actually seen statistics on that very fact. And Qualcomm is not the worst. But they're right up there in like, I want to say they're in the top three in terms of stadiums. It's junk. I mean, there's no doubt about it. It's built in the 70s. In the early 70s, I want to say.

3:59:05The Murph, nothing would make me happier than if they cleaned out all those offices and they put dynamite all around that place and stuck the plunger down and then built a brand new jewel. A beautiful, let me tell you, I watch those cowboy games. It's the best. I've been there. It's incredible. One billion dollars. What it's done for the city is incredible. A billion dollars. And dude, I gotta admit, when they pan that camera through that Cowboys stadium, your jaw drops open and you're like, they built that? Well, the Super Bowl's gone there, right? I was just there last year. I've been on the field. It's a sight to behold. It's the biggest high-definition scoreboard in the world. The high-definition scoreboard? It's the biggest in the world. It goes from the 20-yard line to the 20-yard line. It's massive. It was so big. They had to install it in stages. It took forever. Wow. And then when they first installed it and they kicked their first punt, they realized, oh no, it's too low. We just hit it. They hit the scoreboard with a punt. Every now and then some guy can still get it. So they had to take this ginormous scoreboard and... What do they put on there that needs to be high def? It's the game. Do you like replays and stuff? Yeah, the replays. Oh, okay. Imagine that, though. You've been there, Woods. I've been there. You've seen it. It's ungodly. Yeah.

4:00:28Unbelievable. Hillary, what do you got coming up next? It's really good for the kiss cam. Can I just take five seconds and paint a picture of what I just walked into? Yes. I'm sitting next to what's Copenhagen Tums hot sauce, Cornhuskers lotion, donuts, and a pair of jeans. That's our boy. That's a true statement. We put some. Eclectic. I feel like I need a surgical outfit over me. We put a little thing of yogurt. Placed a little canister of yogurt in those pants. And then we blindfolded L.O.B., and she reached into Woods' pants. She had to tell us what's in Woods' pants. And listeners guessed. Bingo Bambo. There it is. Hopefully he'll call me back this time. There you go. It's true. Learn your lesson. Bit of a heartbreaker. What do you got coming up, Hill? Oh, well, I grabbed a song that Dave Grohl has called the Song of the Year. I'm going to play a song from an album that is celebrating its 20th anniversary this Saturday in a really big way. And in the 11 o'clock hour, Trent Reznor has been very busy online these days. I'll tell you what he's up to and play some Nine Inch.

4:01:41nails it's all good stuff there you go lovely and talented hillary is up next and we'll come back at six and do it again the mikey shows out