The Mikey Show - FM 94.9 - 11/04/11
Friday, November 4, 2011
daylight saving timeclock settingVCR time issuesCity in Color ticketsFidel Castro hatLaDainian Tomlinson commentsPhillip Rivers distractionPackers game previewChargers injuriesConrad Murray trialMichael Jackson deathEllen DeGeneres Eddie Murphy interview
The show opened with a discussion about daylight saving time and the hassle of setting clocks, contrasting modern self‑setting devices with the old VCR blinking problem. Later, the hosts laughed about Woodsy’s Fidel Castro‑style hat and L.O.B.’s Starbucks‑induced makeup mishap, then turned to sports where LaDainian Tomlinson defended Phillip Rivers as merely distracted, while the crew previewed the upcoming undefeated Packers game and outlined the Chargers’ injury woes. The conversation shifted to legal news, recapping the Conrad Murray trial’s closing arguments in Michael Jackson’s death, and then to entertainment with Ellen DeGeneres interviewing Eddie Murphy about his possible return to Saturday Night Live. The hour closed with a promotion for the San Diego Brewers Guild Festival, marking FM 94.9’s ninth anniversary and the kickoff of Beer Week.
What happened, in order
Daylight Saving Hassle
The hosts discuss the upcoming daylight‑saving change, mocking the effort of resetting old clocks and VCRs while praising modern self‑setting devices.
Fidel Castro Hat & Makeup Mishap
Woodsy shows up in a black army/Fidel Castro hat, L.O.B. reveals her Starbucks‑inspired makeup, and the crew jokes about looking like a slut and a mamacita.
Tomlinson on Rivers’ Distraction
LaDainian Tomlinson is quoted saying Phillip Rivers seems distracted on the sideline, sparking a debate about whether the comment is fair or media‑driven.
Packers Preview
The crew hypes the upcoming undefeated Packers game at Qualcomm, noting the Chargers’ chance to finally win at home.
Chargers Injury Report
Updates are given on Vincent Jackson’s hamstring, Malcolm Floyd’s hip, Ryan Matthews’ groin, and other Chargers ailments affecting the lineup.
Conrad Murray Trial Recap
Closing arguments from the Conrad Murray trial are recapped, emphasizing how Murray’s betrayal of Michael Jackson’s trust led to the singer’s death.
Ellen DeGeneres & Eddie Murphy
Ellen DeGeneres is set to interview Eddie Murphy about his possible return to Saturday Night Live, with Murphy reflecting on his past with the show.
Beer Week Festival Kickoff
The San Diego Brewers Guild Festival is promoted as the official kickoff to Beer Week, featuring 32 local breweries, live music, and FM 94.9’s ninth‑anniversary celebration.
People mentioned
MikeyWoodsLLBJamieL.O.B.ChrisLaDainian TomlinsonPhillip RiversAntonio GatesVincent JacksonMalcolm FloydRyan MatthewsCurtis BrinkleyTyron Green
38,851 words, machine transcribed. Click any timestamp to jump the player there.
Sometimes my friend Woods is a caveman. Yeah. I like to get my friend LLB. I didn't ride it, pal. That's right. He gets her. I'll try to rile her up. She knows. Now she knows. She goes, I know what you're doing. Used to? You're not going to get me. She didn't used to know that. That's right. It's a Mikey show. It's Friday, and you know what that means. It means we're going to have a live studio audience, but this Friday it also means that we've got Daylight Savings that's going to hit us on Sunday morning at 2 a.m. So you've got to set the clocks back. Now, most people have the newfangled clocks that when you plug them in, they set themselves, and they're like $10 at CVS. Your average set on the nightstand clock.
Will set itself. Which is good, man. I don't like dealing with it. I hate going through the house. Turning stuff back. Remember dealing with VCRs, Woods? And you had to get on the remote and go into the VCR. We never did. I've never had a VCR that had the time set. Ever. It always blinked? Always blinked. You just put a piece of electrical tape over it. Problem solved. That would not fly in my home. Always. Really? Yeah, always. Never had one that set, ever. Does Jamie take care of your clocks in your house and making sure they do the thing, or is that your job? I do my own because it's next to my bed, but her iPhone is her alarm every day. She doesn't even have a clock. So you guys don't have clocks in the house? We have the microwave clock. I'll do that. Yeah. She won't do it. I actually once went a whole cycle with the clock in my car. I just left it, and then I would be like, oh, cool, I'm an hour early. The time is very important. And so I have a giant clock. Have you been in the house? Yeah. A big digital clock with numbers that are about six inches big. Because I got to know. I have to know big what time it is, you know? Yeah. So this weekend we set him back. You get an extra hour of sleep. Happy birthday. So great. It gets dark at like four, which is awesome. It's awesome. It sucks. It's good for Mike. He goes to bed early. Yeah.
That'll be nice. The word of the day is decimal. And sometime between now and 10, I'll say that. And City in Color tickets up for grabs. Nice. Tuesday night. Now I'm going again. You are going. I was going to ask you this morning. I'm going. Yes. I'm going again. What changed? Well. Because you waffled a little bit on, I think, Tuesday. You said, I don't know if I'm going to go. And I hadn't said anything to my wife, Rebecca, who also loves the band. Your wife loves the band. Very much. And so I said, hey, the day after Taylor Swift, I was a little, you know, loopy. And, you know, so I figure if we get to see City in Color come into the studio that morning and perform, I mean, I'm good. Right. And she said, well, if you don't want to go, you know, we don't have to. You're looking forward to it. Yeah, if you don't want to spend that time. It's quality time. It's quality time. It's not like he's here every weekend. Yeah. We'll go see him the next time, you know? Yeah, 2015. Yeah, when he comes through again. We'll have that to look forward to. Yeah, and then we can just put it on the calendar. So I immediately wrote back and said, yeah, we're going. So we're going. Nice. Well, we'll make a day out. Yes. Get an early dinner about 3.30. It ain't bad. Early bird special. That's right.
Woodsy is our handsome and talented sports guy. Talented's fine. Now, you got a new one rocking today. New hat rocking. I've worn it before. How would you describe it, L.O.B.? What's the style? It's almost like an army hat. A black army hat. Fidel Castro. Yeah. Big player with Fidel. He's wearing a Fidel Castro. That's all he has to say. He's my boy. Yeah, your boy Fidel Castro. Yeah. Tom Morello from Rage Against the Machine is a big player in his life. Yes. I don't like it. I can't wear it because if I wear it, I look like Super Mario. Just Mario. Minus the super. Before he gets the mushroom to get big. Yes, that's correct. L.O.B. is... Foxy today. Makeup on. It's a Friday, and I walked into the Starbucks. I walked into the Starbucks this morning, and my friend Chris, who's in there every morning, too, he looks and he goes, hey, Mikey, all right, that's what I'm talking about. And I thought in my head, oh, man, I must look like a slut. Oh, because you're dressed up. Oh, yeah, because I wore a nice jacket today with a T-shirt and everything. And he's like, hey.
That's what I'm talking about. That's it. I'm on the freaking radio, pal. We can wear bathrobes up here, and sometimes we do. I know. It's bad. I'm in a bad habit. LLB looks like freaking Farrah Fawcett. I know it. Hey, listen. She's foxy anyway, but when she does it up. Mamacita. Mamacita. I want to squeeze them. Sometimes when we compliment her, I get the feeling she likes it, yet she wants to slap us in the face. No, I do like it. You do? Who doesn't like it? All right. Liars. Yeah, if anybody says they don't like it, they're just a liar. What if she said, you guys, it's making me very uncomfortable. And if you continue to do it, I'm going to have to have a conversation with HR. You know what happened to Herman Cain. So if you ever want to run for president, you're screwed. Now, if you left some sort of pubic hair on my cocaine. Oh, gosh. Oh, my gosh. That would be a game changer. That's an Anita Hill reference. Yes. And Clarence Thomas. And we would never do that. Excuse me. Me or Chris, our phone screener, would never do that. Well, Chris didn't have any yet, so. Oh, Jay. Oh, my God. He's still waiting. Oh, no. You.
You monstrous. He's in there right now training someone. A beautiful, beautiful girl. Gosh. And he's just the dad that's like, you know he's got a little wiener. He's my son. When I bathed him when he was a baby, it's the same sex. He is. He's that dad. He's that dad. Hey, girl, you know that he's incontinent? Did you know that? He has to wear an adult diaper. Is that your new girlfriend? Remember that, Dad? Is that your new girlfriend? No, Dad, it's my friend. And you're thinking, who I want to be my girlfriend, but you're ruining it. I'm helping you. I'm helping you get that girlfriend. Hey, you tell her about those little yellow peepee stains in your white little undies? Hey, let me tell you something. He's 16. He's still got them. Hey, Minuteman, is that your new girlfriend? You better not tell her the last one gave you the crab. Should we tailor your little nickname? Should we tailor? I had to swallow my coffee. Go ahead. Yeah, what is it? A little twigs and berries. Should we tailor that? You just did. Too late. Dad. My bad. Dad. Shut up. That is Jay. Yeah, it is. Captain Callout. He's 48.
And if you want to know more about him, just go to imdb.com because he's on there. Put himself on there. Well, you have to. Special skills. Special skills. Accents. Receding hairline. He made sure to put receding. Hey, I just want to be honest, okay? If you want to be honest, why did you put that your accents are British and Jamaican? And German. Oh, you're Jamaican me horny, man. See, look at that. Which one was that? That was Jamaican. Just because you say mon at the end of something doesn't mean you sound like you're Jamaican. Yeah, mon. Oh, my God. Identical Jamaican. A white Jamaican. Yeah, our phone screener is cross. It's cross. Tell me the name of the girl that he's training here. I'll forget. Nicole. I can't remember names. I cannot remember. It's a deficiency. Some people are great at it. There's a game that you need to learn. What? So you look at Nicole. and then you see something in her that triggers something. That's a great... You think of like a Nicole you used to know that had dark hair. I do that with virtually everything else, Woods, and I've never thought to do that because one of my real deficiencies is names. I've never thought to do that. That's it. You should. That's the deal. You just think of another Nicole. Yep. Okay. So Woods...
is going to tell us about some comments that were made by LaDainian Tomlinson. And we're going to figure out what we make of this. Yes. We had a little conversation this morning off the air about it. And we kind of agree. We kind of disagree. Basically, somebody had asked LT. They said, hey, so what's going on with your boys back in San Diego? You know, why the recent slide? And what's with Phillip Rivers fumbling that snap? LT says, quote, I don't know what Phillip may be going through right now, but I will say to me he seems distracted for some reason, like on the sideline. He seems like he's just distracted. And I've always said this. It's hard to be the guy. When they say this is your team, it's hard to be the guy because you get all the questions of what's right and what's wrong, and you have your teammates who expect certain things from you, blah, blah, blah. He says the gist of it is, hey, it's hard to be the guy, and Phillip seems distracted. That's the gist of his comments. So Rivers gets off the practice field yesterday. They walk right up to him and say, hey, did you hear what LT said about you? And he said, no. Well, what's the deal? They tell him. He goes, well, based on what you guys have told me, I haven't seen him, but he must be speaking from experience because LT was the guy here, right? I mean, he was the man. Well, I mean, they both were. Right. They both were. And so, I mean, really, I mean, let's be honest. There were three.
major superstars on this team. LaDainian Tomlinson, Phillip Rivers, and Antonio Gates were major superstars. Team leader-wise, though, LT was the guy, right? No! Rivers? I say Rivers was the guy. You know, I mean, he was... He's the vocal leader. I think they were a three-headed the guy. Yeah. I mean, I really do. I mean, I think that those guys are as big of stars as each other. You know, LT is... World-class running back. Well, see, and Phillip disagrees with you because Phillip says, I don't feel that burden, nor has it ever had anything to do with the struggles. People say it's your team. I've never bought into that. Yeah, see, my deal is I wanted to give LT the benefit of the doubt. I didn't think he was trying to poke a tiger. I didn't think he was trying to be rascally. I thought he was just... Well, my issue is you worry about... What's going on up there in New Jersey? Well, they asked them a question. They asked them. Okay, ask me. I'm LT. Well, first of all, right now you're prepared. No, ask me. So I'm asking you. Imagine I'm asking you a bunch of questions in the middle. Okay. Tell us about the Jets. Your little win last week. And I go, hey, your old team is struggling back in San Diego, and Phillip Rivers is having a really tough season. What do you think it's about? I have no idea. I'm not there. Perfect. I don't live there.
play there. I'm not in the locker room. I know Phillip. Phillip's a hell of a competitor. Phillip's going to be just fine. Don't worry about him. Well, hey, I don't have a problem with what you said. You've had the benefit of being able to see it, analyze it, think about it. I didn't think he said anything bad. It stands to reason. Does the press ever try to stir things up between people? Sure, sure they do. But when you say, hey, he seems distracted. I saw him on the sidelines and he's distracted. Is he LT? Is he really distracted? I mean, he's not having a good year. He knows him. I don't know him. Couldn't he be saying it as a friend? Yeah. And I mean, clearly there is something wrong. You know, there just is. And they're asking him, well, what do you think it is? I don't know. I mean, I don't know. It looks like he's distracted. That's kind of crappy to say. What he's not saying is, well, you know, what I do know about the guy is he loves to...
Go cruising for chicks. I just didn't see it as bad. Well, A.J. Smith was not pleased with it at all. And so they asked him about, hey, what do you think about these comments? And A.J. said, quote, I agree with what LT said about it's hard being the guy, but I also think it's a lot harder when it's no longer your team and you're not the guy. And that's true. He ain't the guy in New York. He's not. He's not even close to the guy. Well. Yeah, that's true. I mean, listen, hey, you know who doesn't get stuff stirred up about him? The guy that keeps his mouth shut. Yeah, maybe he said too much. It's true. It's the New York Jets. I'm not a professional athlete. I get paid for my opinions. I blame the media, and that's you. You're the media, too. You're stirring it up. I say they're stirring it up. I'm just reporting. I'm reporting, and it seems to me. But you have a take. Your take is that it's. My take is zip your lip, and it's the New York Jets way. Am I wrong about that? No. Plaxico Burris does nothing but flap gum. Rex Ryan does nothing but flap gum. That's not LT, man. That's not LT. Obviously it is. I'm holding the paper. I get the benefit of the doubt. I don't think that he's trying to be a jerk. I think he was doing it. And maybe I'm wrong. Maybe you guys, maybe as you're listening, you see it that way. You see that he should have just kept his mouth shut and blah, blah, blah. And he probably called Phillip and was like, hey, dude.
That got taken out of context. My bad. I'm sure he did. Because if they're as close of friends as you say. I don't know. I don't know if they are. Well, if they were on the same team for many years. I don't know if Antonio Gates and him are real close. I don't know how. I don't know what the relationship between Phillip Rivers and Quentin Jammer is. I don't know. Yeah. But what I do know is LT. I've met him a few times. And every time I've met him, he's been a really stand-up guy. You know, this was the LT that I remember. Him coming in the studio, and we'd ask him a question. He'd say, yes, sir. And this was not rookie LT. This was LT that was a humble dude. Hall of Famer LT. Hall of Famer that was just a good dude. Dude, I agree. And great in the community. He always has been. He was at TCU. God, he's a legend in Fort Worth, where I'm from, basically. He's a legend there. An absolute legend. But, again, my deal is, you worry about the Jets. you know, people here and let, they ask him. What? Wow, Jay is now asking himself what he just said. Well, I can hear it now. Thanks for pointing it out. You just, you worry about your, that's my whole, that's my whole motto, man, is I worry about what's on my little plate here. Yeah. I think it's easier said than done when you're approached about something.
And, you know, hey, I can see where Woods is coming from. He ain't a rookie. He's been in this league a long-ass time, and he knows what he should say and what he shouldn't say. Let me put it this way. If that comment was coming from Terrell Owens, instantly I'd be like, look at that guy. Look at this guy. But because it's coming from somebody who has a history of being class and stand-up, I go, Does the press ever just try to make something where it doesn't exist? Because that's not who that man is. Front page sports in the UT. Again, it doesn't happen to the guy that zips his lip. And it gets us talking about it. Also, man, there's a huge game this weekend, and it's the Packers. The Packers are coming to town. They are undefeated. It's at 115 at Qualcomm. It sets up real nice for us. I really think so. I really think it sets up nice. We gave one up last week. We gave that game away. It was done. It was over. We had it. They have to have, this is what it is, right? Pride. They just got to go, listen, the undefeated Packers can't come into our house and push us around. And their defense is not that great.
And our offense hasn't been that great. But if we can get going on all cylinders, if Gates can play, he's been rested all week. Ryan Matthews will not play, more than likely. He's hurt. Thumb? So, yeah, what was the deal? I just read it this morning. Here's the thing, too, is that whatever. Groin. Groin. Ow. Yeah. And those are hard to heal. Vincent Jackson. Practiced full. Malcolm Floyd did not practice second straight day, but he still may play on Sunday. And listen, if there's a setup game, this is it. And whatever Phillip Steele is, he got figured out. Whatever's going on. He's having the worst year of his career. Yeah, he's in a funk. He's in a funk. He's in a funk. Maybe he's distracted. Probably. Could be distracted by something. I bet he is. I bet he is. I mean, what other options are there? He's hurt. He's playing hurt. Is he? Maybe. I mean, he's got a little thumb issue himself. But guys like Phillip Rivers aren't going to be like, I can't go. My thumb is killing me. Oh, yeah, yeah. I didn't know that he had a hurt thumb. Yeah. Let's see. Oh, the judge that beat his daughter six years ago, seven years ago, is not going to face charges. Here's what the guy that is the police chief in Rockport, Arkansas says.
He's not going to face charges because of the five-year statute of limitations. Oh. It's a five-year statute of limitations. Really? He says, we believe that there was a criminal offense involved and that there was substantial evidence to indicate that, and under normal circumstances, a charge could have been made. Wow. Now, yesterday, he releases a statement saying, Hey, just so you know, the reason that she did this is because I took her Mercedes away because she wanted to drop out of school. She wanted to drop out of school. And I told her, you're not going to drop out of school. And if you do drop out of school, I'm not paying for your car. I'm not paying for your cell phone. And she said something to the effect of, well, if you do that, you're screwed because I got something on you. Blah, blah, blah. Blackmail. Blackmail. And hey. But another, here's, if that's true, okay, all it means is that you got two bad guys. Right. That's all it means. Because this dude is sadistic. At least, you know, in that video, he's sadistic. Totally. He raised her, so. And it's child abuse, and it's ugly, and it's monstrous, and it's wicked. But if that's her bit, if it's true, I don't know.
I don't know if that's the deal. But if so, that's pretty ugly, too. Like we're going to believe him? Yeah. Yeah, I guess. He says if the public must know. Well, he released this statement through his lawyer. It says the public must know just prior to the YouTube upload, a concerned father shared with his 23-year-old daughter that he was unwilling to continue to work hard to be her primary source of financial support if she was going to simply drop out. and strive to achieve no more in life than to work her part-time job at a video game store. Hillary warned her father that if he reduced her financial support and took away her Mercedes, which her father had provided, he would live to regret it. Then the post was uploaded. Yeah, I mean, if that's true, then you have a monstrous father and a spoiled brat daughter.
Sounds like a great spin to me. From him? Yeah. Spin doctor. Well, it's going to be probably easy to find out. Probably be easy to find out. And we will. We will know this, whatever this thing is, we'll know all about it in the next few days. And then they're wrapping up the trial with Conrad Murray. This is the guy that... was Michael Jackson's doctor that they think gave him the legal dose of propofol. Lethal dose. What did I say legal? The lethal dose of propofol that killed him. So this is some of the closing statements from the prosecution. Michael Jackson trusted. What's trusted? Conrad Murray. I can tell you later. He trusted him with his life. There you go. He trusted him with his own individual life and the future lives of his children. Beat it. Trusting that Conrad Murray, as Michael slept, would care for him. Excuse me. Hang on a second. Excuse me, sir. If you have to sneeze during our closing arguments, can you please muffle it with your t-shirt? Oh, boy. Beat it.
Beat it. With his children. But Conrad Murray corrupted that relationship. And for that, Michael Jackson paid with his life. Very dramatic. Yes, very dramatic. It's a little dramatic. It's a little dramatic. You're so dramatic! I would rather hear a Metallica Michael Jackson duet than a Lou Reed Michael Jackson duet. It's not even called a duet. You know, them getting together. Collab. Yeah, collaboration. By the way, guess who's going to direct the video for that terrible pairing of Metallica and Lou Reed? Ron Jeremy. No. No.
Lou Reed and Metallica. What is it, LLB? It's like peanut butter. Peanut butter and cocktail sauce. Peanut butter and cocktail sauce. They go together like peanut butter and cocktail sauce. Such a terrible cocktail. It's awful. Great on their own. Yeah. Great on their own. Serve a great purpose. Peanut butter and A1 sauce. Not good together because they serve very different purposes. Oh, my God. That's hideous. But the guy that's going to direct the video is Darren. Aronofsky, the guy that directed Black Swan and The Wrestler. He's a genius. He's a genius. Yep. So maybe you can watch it on mute. Yeah. Might be good if you watch it on mute. Here's the deal. We have some good stuff coming up for you. Excuse me. Yeah, I'm having some bowel obstruction. Oh, boy. That have just really been giving me some issues. Gotta get you. Give me your fits. Every once in a while, I'll just... Oh, sorry. I'm sorry. You're going to be okay. Sorry about that. As my dad would say, Ellen Degenerate, interviewed Eddie Murphy yesterday. And did you know that Eddie Murphy had a beef with SNL? Oh, yeah. I did not know. Oh, yeah. And she asked him about it, and he answered the question whether he would ever go back on SNL ever again. And we'll play it for you when we come back.
The countdown has begun. Only one day to go. It's the official kickoff to San Diego Beer Week this Saturday afternoon at Liberty Station. FM 94.9 and Napa Auto Parts presents the San Diego Brewers Guild Festival. This is the ultimate craft beer festival showcasing all 32 members of the guild drink legendary and award-winning beers. Meet the Brewers, Stone, Ballast Point, Green Flash, Coronado, Alpine, Port, Carl Strauss, Alesmith, Mission, Lost Abbey, Rock Bottom, Aztec, Automatic, Iron Fist, and more. And rock out all day. Help us celebrate our night. 9th anniversary with two stages of music. Performing on the FM 94.9 anniversary stage. Matthew Sweet. Telekinesis. Stone Foxes. On the local 94.9 stage.
The Bloody Hollies. Dead Feather Moon. Family Wagon. Advanced tickets for the general session are $35. This price includes beer and music. The ticket price will increase the day of, so get them now at FM949SD.com. It's our ninth anniversary and the official kickoff to Beer Week. It's the San Diego Brewers Guild Festival. See you tomorrow. Get your tickets and details at FM949SD.com. Just when you thought it might not happen, football season is back at U31. North Park's number one bar and grill with the Sunday ticket. Every game on 20 big screen TVs. Feast on an award-winning burger or mind-blowing nachos while cheering for your team at U31. And FM 94.9 will be there for Sunday afternoon football at U31. College ball fans, we have $3 U Call It every Saturday, 12 to 6 p.m. That's right, $3 U Call It every Saturday at U31. Your football headquarters. Website at u31bar.com. I know we haven't been together very long, but things are moving fast with you. Really fast. If you're not in love with your internet provider, it's time to switch to Cox High Speed Internet with Power Boost. I have to ask myself, is it too fast? And the answer is no. With Cox, you can download faster than with AT&T. And plans start at just $14.99 a month for six months when you order online at cox.com.
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Kaiser Permanente. We want you to get up, get down, and thrive. Visit kp.org slash thrive. Oh, I did not mean to do that. Jim, Jim, you don't mind me saying so. Your surgical skills have been a tad uneven lately. It's these energy drinks. First couple hours, I'm like, slicing torsos like carpaccio, and then bam, energy crash. I mean, how do you do it, Dave? You're as sharp as the scalpel in my hand. It's called alternative energy, and it's made by Function Drinks. Its all-natural formula gives me steady, sustained energy that tastes great. Not like those scary little shots that are filled with who knows what. Ah, and the spleen is out. Woo! You know you're a dentist, right? Oh, man, I gotta try alternative energy. Function. Alternative energy. It's the delicious, healthy energy drink that lasts up to eight hours with a formula of natural stimulants that kicks in at different stages. So when one is wearing off, another is just starting and there's no crash. Function. Alternative energy is energy with the brain. Get it at CVS, Ralph's, Sprouts, and Whole Foods markets. This report is brought to you by Allstate. Call Allstate now and you'll get a lifetime membership in Good Hands Roadside Assistance. Absolutely free. Shop less, get more. Make one call to an Allstate agent.
Well, we still have a sig alert working this morning here on the 5 southbound after the 52, an earlier accident that happened way earlier this morning, but it was a fatality. So they've got an investigation going on. The 805 southbound between the 5, the North End and Claremont Mesa Boulevard, traffic congestion. And as you travel through the 805 northbound at La Jolla Village Drive, you're going to find some delay. This report brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers, Toyota owners. When it's time to service your Toyota, your best choice is your San Diego County Toyota dealer. Great prices, service while you wait. available Wi-Fi, shuttle service, and more. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Come on, man, wake up. Good morning. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. For those of you that have never seen me, I'm a short, chunky guy. Woods. I just try not to be the dirty, creepy pig in my head. Lauren. Do you have coconut water? And Jay. I'm wearing cargo shorts right now. On FM 94.9. Feels like it is, I'm waking up. Like I'm back from the dead, I'm stepping down. And I feel so... Yeah. Dog. Yeah, dog. I wish I could say dog and it didn't sound so stupid. I only say it to black guys that I pass in the hallway. Hey, what's up, dog? What's up, dog? And then I kick myself in the shin. And you go, why did I do that? Why did I do that? Why must I do that? I did it two days ago again. What's up, my brother?
Oh, my God. Oh, wow. Right when I say it. You say it and you go, I probably shouldn't have done that. What's up, homie? Oh, boy. Whoa. I feel bad for you. Yeah, it's a sickness. But I do have a black friend, an OBS. One. Just one. If, besides me, if there were a Hispanic in the building, would you pass and be like, hey, carnal, what's up? That was weird. That was strange. Hey, amigo. Hola, hombre. What's up, amigo? Hey, hola, dude. Hola, hombre. He's like. I don't understand. I don't speak Spanish. What do you say? What is that? It's a curse and a sickness. He says, what's up, chica, to the Latina girls. What's up, chica? What's up, chica? It's true. You don't. Yeah. You know, head from corn. He says dog. And it works. It works. You know why? Because he grew up in an area in Bakersfield that was. Gnarly. Yeah. And that's the way they talked. Yep. He says it, it's normal. Not my favorite place. No. I don't think the people that live in Bakersfield think Bakersfield is their favorite place. But some guys can get away with it. Sonny from POD, he can say dog. It's good. Yep. Works. Me, I can't say it. I can't either. No. I can.
Yeah, L.O.B. can. What up, dog? Well, L.O.B. says to Woods, what's up, son? What's up, son? Every time I call. Yeah. It's hysterical. She answers the phone and goes, what's up, son? I've stolen it. I do it to my friends at home. What's up, son? What's up, son? It's great. It's a good bit. Word of the day's decimal. Don't forget it because when I say it, City and Color tickets on the line for you so you can call us and if you're calling nine, you'll get to go. Eddie Murphy about his time on SNL. Will you do Saturday? Is there something going on that you haven't been back for a while, Saturday Night Live? Will you go back and host? Not anymore. Now I'm cool. I would go back if it was the right, you know, the right situation. Sure. Yes. Yeah. I'm telling you, I'm doing lots of stuff now. I'm hosting the Oscars. I'll go back to SNL. I've already, I've already, there's lots of stuff coming down. All right, good. Yeah. I look forward to it. You should definitely host it. Yeah. It's been... About 25 years since I've been back there. And what was it? You said it's cool now. What was it that you didn't go back? Oh, it was a couple. Over the years, you know, like the little, did little stuff over the years where I was like, hey, I ain't going back.
No, I'm not tripping. It was years ago, and I don't have any bad blood with that show. And that show is such a big part of my past. And I love, you know, being part of it. So, yeah, I'm going to go back. You just cursed again. You know that, right? Yes, sir. Did the same thing on a live video the other night. Yeah, yeah. I know what it was, specifically. They showed a picture of, they were doing the Weekend Update deal, and they showed a picture of him when he was in Vampire in Brooklyn, which was a god-awful movie. He had this long black wig on, and it pops up on the screen, and David Spade goes, oh, look, kids, a falling star. Oh, my gosh. And he was pissed, dude. And he's like, look, you can make fun of Eddie. But he's like, when you take a shot at my career, after all I did for you guys, and after all I've done in my career, and let's call it, you know, hey, it's David Spade. You know what I mean? Like, who are you? You're no one without Chris Farley, in fact. Right, exactly. Truly. A hundred. Yeah. And that's just, come on, man. And Eddie. You're supposed to have respect for Eddie, because Eddie's one of the.
He's one of the dudes. He carried the torch, bro. He's one of the dudes. He is. He's one of the greats. Yeah. I read the Rolling Stone article yesterday about him. It's really long and detailed and he gets really deep in it. But he's one of my favorite humans on this earth. Like, as far as his movies, I've never enjoyed movies like I did Eddie Murphy's movies. Really? Old movies. Oh, yeah. Blue and Ash. Really? He's made some turds, dude. Well, of course. He has. Of course he's made some turds. He said in this article, he's like, look. There were some things I wanted to do. And he goes, listen, they throw the kind of paper at you that they were throwing at me. He goes, makes it real hard to be like, he goes, listen, I could fully see myself. They threw enough paper at me being like, yeah, holy man, too. It's coming. I'm really excited about it. I read the script. He goes, look, dude, I got money now. I don't have to do anything I don't want to do. But you think about his golden movies. I thought he did. I thought he did. And there's some actresses and actors that I go, I wonder why some actors. They choose great roles. Right. And all the movies that they've made are pretty good. Right. And then there's some actors hit and miss. Yep. And then some of them just make turds. Right. Yeah. And he made his fair share of turds. But, you know, I challenge you. Who said a dude from Saturday Night Live? Norm MacDonald. Oh, turds. He can't. He cannot make a good movie. You know who else does not translate to film is Chris freaking Rock. Chris Rock's movies are garbage compared to Eddie's. No, he's not a good actor. Eddie Murphy could act.
And he could act his butt off. I mean, you look at his good against his bad, and it's, you know. His new movie coming out today. Critics are saying it's good. Tower Heist. Yeah, they say it's funny. It's really funny. Reminds me of like a 90s just. Yeah, it's going to be fun. It looks like it's going to be good. I think it's going to be really funny. Not my type of deal, but I still think, you know, they say it's good, you know. There's a funny clip that we got today from it, but it's really, really good. So here's the deal. I may have gone to Wendy's yesterday. I may have. I may have gone. Good for you, buddy. Treat yourself. Thank you, Woods. Grown-ass man. Do whatever you want. Well, here's the thing. I had to fast yesterday for my CAT scan, and so I hadn't eaten anything. What time was your CAT scan? Two. So I had to fast from 10.30 on. I know she's trying to get me. She's trying to get you. He's a prosecutor. Yes, she is. Look at her. She's sitting over there with a wry little smile on her face. Got a yellow legal pad in front of her with a pen. Tell Gandhi that's a fast. That's it. Oh, my God. Mike, it's only three hours. That's not really a fast. I mean, that's, yeah, technically, that's... Waiting for the next meal. Technically, breakfast and lunch and the time between. Normal people go that long. Well, normal people usually wait a little longer.
Pap, don't break your arm. Pat yourself on the back. Oh, my goodness. Three hour. Three whole hour. But anyway, so I got out of there at 3.30, you know, and I go to bed at 6. Dinner time. That was dinner. What did you get? I always get the same thing, the number one. Single. It's a single hamburger. At least it's not a double. Oh, boy. Yeah, I don't like that bit. What is he, a pig? I don't like that bit. I'm convinced Wendy's makes the best hamburger there is. I'm telling you, it's great. They changed everything. They changed their whole menu. It's got red onions on it. A buttered bun. A buttered bun. Thicker patty. I don't know what they do. It's all juicy. Juicier, thicker patty. I hate that word, patty. L-O-B over here. Motivember, you guys should join.
Motivember. You can't just make up words. Is that where you grow a mustache? It doesn't even work. Oh, Movember. It's Movember. This is Motivember. I believe Motivember is her new way to just let us know. And by us, I mean me and you, Woods. Yes. That maybe, you know, we do something with ourselves. Fat boy. It is for me. It's a personal thing for me, but I would not be opposed to people joining and jumping in. What I am doing is just being more conscious. I got a little lazy, hanging around some people who brought me down. Do you remember when you were holding her mouth open and I was shoveling pancakes? You guys are food pushers. For sure. It was just a combination of things, and I blame myself. I got lazy. I started eating stuff that I don't normally eat. Packed on. I'm not 22 anymore. I'm 30. I'm on board with you. You weren't packing. No, you haven't packed anything on. Trust me, I was. Oh, my gosh. So it's got to stop. And the thing is, I know I'm going into the holiday season. There's going to be junk.
All month long in December. And instead of getting into that mentality of like, well, I've already gone this far, I wanted to get into the mentality of like... This is the wrong month. This is Thanksgiving month. No, you've got to lead up to it. I'm going to cheat on Thanksgiving, but you've got to lead up to it and start creating this habit of like, no, I eat healthy now, so I don't crave junk. I crave healthy stuff. Isn't that what freaking New Year's is for? No, I've got to start ahead. That's what a resolution is all about. We'll just wait until then. No, don't wait until then. You guys, you can cut out one thing. No, my friend Ryan said that he's going to hike with me. All right. Yeah, and he's going to, because he is, that's his bit. Loves to hike. He's a hiker. I'm going to hike with you. Glad to. Jay. Seriously, I'll leave you. I know. He'll leave you. I know. Yeah, he will. He'll leave you. He'll make it so that I'm, a few things. A, you know, humiliated. B, completely demoralized. Check, check. I've been there. Check, check. And also pain. Way more pain than needed. We should go as a show. Yeah, let's go for a hike. Leave me out of it. I want no part of a hike. No part. I'll do it if you do it. My ankle hurts. I'm not doing it. That's killing me. He twisted his ankle cheering. You need to build muscles up around it to help support it. It hurts like a bee. You are...
Something else, buddy. Think about how good you guys will feel feasting on Thanksgiving if you've been... Drop a few pounds. Yeah. If you've been doing a few things to take care of yourself and you're like, now I feast. Well, I'm going to give up naps. That's what I'm going to do. I'm going to motivate and give up naps. Naps! I won't nap. I hate him. You're such. I hate him. I hate him. Well, I have. Those aren't a bad thing, Jay. I'm going to give up. I'm going to give up love making. It's going to be hard. I'm only going to make love to Kim 28 days a month. That's right. Gosh darn, I don't know how I'm going to do it. I'll work out six days a week. I'll play with Jasper for nine hours a day, not 12. That's right. Hey, for me, man, that is cutting back. That's sacrifice. Jay only naps like once every two weeks. If you guys gave up naps, that would be a good thing. I don't nap anymore. You don't? I don't. Every day. Nope. I do not nap anymore. Maybe you can both give up the fast food for the month. It's already the fourth. You only have 26 more days. Easy done. Well, here's my conundrum. Here's my problem. My wife is a vegetarian now, therefore does not cook a lot.
anymore, leaving me to my own devices, which left to my own devices, it's Taco Bell time. No. You can, you know, grill some zucchini. Sounds foul. You can make tacos at home. All she's saying is we don't do fast food for a month. Right, right. And I don't know that I can do that because that means I don't eat. Oh, please. Just make some food. Open a can of beans, taco shells, cheese. Yeah, there you go. I'm not saying you can't have tacos, but maybe make them your... On your own. Yeah. Sounds delicious. Open a can of beans. Taco shell. You can't make it. And cheese. There's a lot of preservatives and sodium that will add up quickly. And you'd be surprised. It's filthy. Turkey meat. Listen. Come on, guys. I don't tell you guys what to do. I don't tell you guys what to do. Yeah, you do. I'm on board. Yes. And so is Woods. I'm putting on it. You guys are going to look so good. Are we? Yeah. Are we? Oh, I'm going to be so thin that I'll have to jump around in the shower just to get wet. Yep. It's a big shower. Really? I mean, I went the extra step. Yep. Yeah. I think you'll be surprised. Yeah. You'll see a nice difference. Yeah. And I'll be proud of you. All right. Fine. What is the deal? I do no fast food. Motivember. Yeah. We don't do any fast food this month. Doesn't mean you can't go out to eat. I need a little clarification.
It's Chipotle fast food. Yes. It's not. You don't drive through. It's healthy. What is the qualification? I think that anything that's made to order like that, you can do that. You could even do Subway. Okay. Subways. Yeah. Jared, that guy lost like 300 pounds. But I'm talking about traditional fast food. Drive-thrus. Yes. Anything that has a drive-thru. There you go. All right. Done. Except for Starbucks. If it doesn't have a drive-thru, we're good to go. We're good to go. There you go. Perfect. I know. KFC that doesn't have a drive-thru. Hey, no, no, no, no. If it usually has one. If that chain has stores with drive-thrus, we are not allowed to frequent it. And M1s, you're joining us, all right? Motivember. It's Motivember. It's Motivember. I want everybody on this. Join us. Do one thing that's going to get you motivated this month. I won't eat fast food. Jay, you already don't. What a jerk. Imagine if Jay... had to go without calling you and I fat for a month. Couldn't do it. He couldn't. No fat jokes. I can't, Mike. I can't, dude. I can't do it. It's like heroin. Yeah? That's better. Better than heroin. I mean, I'd go to Betty Fraud or whatever you did. Fraud. Betty Fraud. And I'd tell him, I'd say, listen, I'll stay here for 30 days. It ain't going to work. I'll be calling it in if I have to. I'll be leaving them damn voicemails.
I'm going to cheat. I'm going to tell you now. You have to tie me down. Let's see. Jay giving up anything or just us? Naps. Naps. You don't even nap now. What about candy? Candy. I'll give up candy. He eats candy like crazy. I like to eat candy. Daylight savings is Sunday night, so don't forget. Turn them back an hour. What's the bid? It's at 2 a.m., right? 2 a.m., so set them back. Just before you go to bed, set them back. Maybe we vote it out. I'm down with that. I'm not. I am so down with that. Let's see. So, Woodsy says in his recap that he was thinking about dudes who shouldn't be in movies, let alone be movie stars. Yes. Go ahead. I was watching a movie yesterday with David Caruso in it. Good actor. Fake-o, tough guy. Yeah. Like, one of the worst I've ever seen. The only reason he isn't an Oscar winner is because he has red hair and red eyebrows. What is he in? The movie I watched was with Nick Cage called Kiss of Death. Yeah. Because he's translucent, he can't get the work, but he's a brilliant actor. He is not a brilliant actor. He's not brilliant.
You know who's a brilliant actor? Johnny Depp's a brilliant actor. Do you have any sunglasses? I'm a CSI guy. I think he's an over-actor. He's a fake-o-tough guy. All right, David Caruso walks... So is Al Pacino. So is Robert De Niro. No, those guys are good, though. Classic over-actors. Those guys are good. Okay, they're over-actors, though. They can. They can over-act. If David Caruso walks in, Mike, and says, hey, I'm going to take you outside and kick your butt, I would go... Of course you would. The reason you would is because he's got red hair, red eyes. He's terrible. He's got rabbit eyes, like a white rabbit with pink eyes. He's terrible. I think he's good. He's awful. Every line is delivered like this. We can do this one of two ways, right? Yeah. Either we do it my way, or if you want, we can do it the double way. He's the worst. The other one on my list was Tobey Maguire. Yes, agreed. That guy should be working in a cube somewhere. Agreed. His voice cracks. Spider-Man. Yeah, Spider-Man's voice cracks, really? And Peter Parker. I thought that was Peter Parker's character. Clown. Yeah, but even when he's Spider-Man, he doesn't amp it up at all. He's still a nerd that's always confused. Can't stand that dude. Who else is that? I had a couple more. Do you know Michael Rappaport? Yeah. That guy shouldn't be an actor. He's awful. Really? Awful. He was also in that movie.
What about Ashton Kutcher? I don't think he's a bad actor. I don't think he's bad. He plays the same role. At least he's sharp. He's a sharp cat. He's comedic. He was a model. Yeah, he's a sharp cat. Was he really? Me too. He went by the name of Chris. Who do you not like? You know you got some. You're very opinionated on movies. I like Robert De Niro and I like Al Pacino, but I think they overact. Well, you put their body a work up against... you know, David Caruso, it pretty much stands on its own, obviously. You know why? Why? Because Robert De Niro has had the privilege of being real good friends with a guy named Martin Scorsese. Sure. Who likes to put him in movies. Oh, Robert De Niro's fantastic. He's fantastic. How dare. He delivered. Casino Goodfellas. Have you ever seen that guy when he cuts, like, a promo or something like that? I don't think so. Hello, this is Robert De Niro. I will be hosting the 9-11... program this weekend. He was bad on SNL. I don't think he's very... He's kind of one-dimensional. Drama. He's good in dramas, man. He's good at being a tough guy. Jimmy Conway? Oh, see, that's a deal. Great characters. That guy has played some incredible characters. But, to me, classic over-actor. Unless he's subdued. If you got him subdued in a movie, he's going to be great. And he was brilliant.
In King of Comedy, Martin Scorsese. He's hysterical. Bronx Tale, he's not the bad guy. He's like the hardworking. Yes, he's great in that. Oh, he's so good. Oh, darn, he's good. So good. My favorite actor is Gary Oldman. Doesn't get much better than that cat. That dude's awesome. He's incredible. He can play anything. Yeah. Any gay, stray. He can play a woman. He played Dracula. Yeah, he was Dracula. He's played a million American roles. The guy's British. You ever see True Romance? Yeah, he's great in that. God, he's brilliant. Good movie. Sit down and grab yourself an egg roll. Oh, he's great. So good. Drexel. He's great. Drexel. He's the greatest character. Oh, it's really good. L.O.B.'s going back to New Jersey. That's right. Oh, wow. When are you going? What are you doing? Over the holidays. Yeah. Yep. Going back there for about 10, 11 days. Oh, my gosh. Wow. You're a trooper. My goodness, man. Got to go see the boyfriend's family. Yeah. As well as my family. Is it going to be snowy? You know, they had snow before Halloween. Oh, yeah. Before Halloween. There's a million people without power up there right now. There was almost two. For real? Because of snow? It's being restored, but yeah. Because branches went down, stuff like that. Crazy. That's like a blast. Yeah, it does. It's going to be all, like, all the leaves are going to be gone. It's going to be all, like, nippy. Yeah. Yeah.
I lived in Rochester, New York for a while. It was disgusting this time. Just gray. Depends on where you are, man. Parts of Connecticut you live, you're like, ooh, six feet of snow is badass. As long as there's snow, it looks gorgeous. But if the snow's gone and it's just empty trees and slushy streets, you're like, ooh. Did my usual yesterday, getting my blood drawn, flinched. And so they missed the vein. And they had to go the other one. Don't do it. I know. I hate it. It's the worst thing. I'm such a baby about it. I can't help it. I don't dig it. There was a girl in the waiting room who had on those equestrian riding gear. Oh, yeah. Crop and all that stuff. And she had busted her shoulder. She had busted her shoulder and didn't go to the emergency room. What she wanted was a particular doctor. She wanted a particular doctor to do surgery on her that day. And so she was in excruciating pain, had a friend with her, and they were making phone calls, trying to contact and get an appointment with a doctor. Oh, my gosh. A very specific doctor to have surgery right then and there. Wow. And the only reason I know this is because I started talking to her. She's in pain, and I go, I was being really nice, L.O.B. You're very inquisitive. I am. Oh, my gosh. You are inquisitive.
I said, is there anything I could do to help? And the reason I said that is because she couldn't get any bars on her phone. And I had four bars. And so she was going to use my phone. But then her friend said, oh, I have AT&T. But, yeah, she busts it. It's all jacked. And she refused to just go to an operating room doctor. It was a trip, man. Tough broad. Sorry. It's a stomach. You could be okay, I think. L.O.B. sent us this piece of audio. Jimmy Kimmel tried to get his audience to play a trick on their kids and then send it to them. We got audio of it. We're going to give you our football picks and the whole thing. Don't go away. And don't forget, you're listening for the word decimal. That's the word of the day. When you hear me say that.
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you can trust. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's a witch hunt with Herman Cain, man. It's a witch hunt. I'm Mikey. That's Woodsy. That's L.O.B. Jay is in the other room, and our phone screen is Cross. It's Cross. And Chris is training Nicole today. So Nicole is here as well. So if you call in, you may be hearing the sultry sounds of Nicole. Yeah, Herman Cain apparently is going to have one of the women that's saying that he's sexually harassed her. She's issuing her first statement on what happened as early as today.
It's been front page news. And somebody that's an attorney that's been representing the victims sent the draft of the statement to the National Restaurant Association on Thursday because he used to be the CEO of Godfather's Pizza. And, you know, what I don't get is the the pile on factor or the, you know, if he if he harassed you, sue him. But the coming out now kind of thing, I don't really get it. Or maybe they just say, hey, listen, I don't want this kind of guy to be president. Yep. Which, maybe that's the deal, and that's fair. Woodsy, what's going on in sports? I'm going to give you some chargery. Chargery? Holy crap. Son of a bee. Penudity. It's just like peanutty. I got Jay's vocal herpes. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm going to give you some Chargers injury updates in a second. But first, I want to tell you that sports is brought to us today by U31. It's North Park's number one bar and grill. Well, there are a lot of banged-up Chargers. Wide receiver Vincent Jackson has a hamstring. He did return, practiced full. But Malcolm Floyd...
Has a bum hip. He did not practice. They think he may play. Ryan Matthews has a groin injury. He seems unlikely to play. Those are hard to heal, man. And so the man in his stead will be Curtis Brinkley. He had a concussion in last week's game, but looked pretty good. He had a little spark to him. Tyron Green had a hand. He returned to practice. Chris Dielman is out another week after his concussion and seizure. And Antonio Gates didn't practice, but that's been pretty much par for the course. He's a game day player. I mean, he's just that guy. Sucks for fantasy owners like Mike. And what are they saying about him? That he's day-to-day? Yeah, they want to rest his foot, so they do not want him to practice. And then also, if anybody cares, the NBA is going to resume talks tomorrow to try to get some semblance of an NBA season this year. Oh, good. Yeah. For those of you that love the NBA. Right. Those four of you. So, LLB sent this, and it is? I have to admit, it's pretty funny, albeit a little mean, but what Jimmy Kimmel did was he told his audience, play a trick on your kids for Halloween and send me the tape of it, and if you do, I'll play it. I'm going to tell you what happened to your candy, Blake. I ate it all. I ate yours too, Alan. Me and Mommy ate it last night when you were asleep.
It's a montage of them flipping out. I ate all your Halloween candy last night. What candy? Oh, he punched the wall. What? Oh, wow. He didn't eat your candy. I tricked you. Dad didn't eat all your candy. I tricked you. I would never do it. I would. I could never do it. I think you have to know your kids, though. If I thought my kids were going to cry, I wouldn't do it. I'd be afraid my kids are like... Then I'd tell them something. And they're not sure. But it's trick or treat. You explain trick or treat. I trick my kids all the time. April Fool's, Halloween, you get away with that stuff. April Fool's, maybe. Because that's the whole point of April Fool's. But it is not the point of, is it? The point of Halloween? Yeah, you get a trick or a treat. I trick you, trick or treat. You got treats, I can be tricked. That's right. It's another thing I'm learning. I'm 41, I never knew that. I never knew that Halloween was a practical joke time. I tease my kids all the time. They love it.
They're just like, are you? And then they know when you're serious. I mean, there's no mistaking when you're serious. Yeah. My dad used to do bits on us when we were kids. He did? It was pretty funny, dude. Yeah, it was pretty funny. Like what? Well, we're that family. You know what I mean? He would do the bit of like, hey, you know, we're not going to, turns out we're not going to Disneyland or something. You know, like do bits. And we're like, what? He said, I'm just kidding with you, clown. Yeah. And he was a big surprise guy. He pulled, when I went to the World Series in 99. We watched a whole game the night before, and I didn't know I was going. And at the end of the game, he goes, hey, where are you watching the game tomorrow? And I said, well, here, with you. He goes, we're going. Pulls out two tickets. Bam. Oh, dude. I mean. That's insanity. Freaking rad. I mean, I shot out of my chair like six feet. Was like, what? Flew to New York the next morning at like 6 a.m. Oh, my gosh. Break him down to bring him up. Yes. My dad did that every single Christmas. In fact, he still does it. Makes us line up on the stairs by our age, starting with the oldest in the front. Still doesn't. Yeah. He used to videotape it, but he doesn't videotape it anymore. And he would get down and he would walk backwards. And right before he got to the family room, he'd go, Santa didn't come this year. Every year. Every year. Every year. But when I was little, I'd be... And then you walk in and it's...
Break them down to build them up. You got to do bits with your wife and with your kids. You got to. Hey, listen, Jake, I hate to tell you this, but we lost your Grammy and Grandpa. Oh, God. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No. I'm just kidding. It's just candy. I'm just kidding. Jake, you know that dog that you wanted? Yeah. I got him for you. Yeah. He escaped. No, you guys. Now, that's monstrous. But little stuff. Listen, Jakey, I hate to break it to you, but your daddy's got two days to live. Oh, my God. You're a little over the top with that. Stop it. It doesn't matter. 5701949, did your parents ever jack with you like that on Halloween or New Year's? Not New Year's, April Fool's. Did they ever do anything to you? My parents did pretend like they didn't know it was my birthday that one year, too. All day. Gosh, darn. All day. Gosh, that's... Oh, that's tough. That's hard to hear. All day. Then a big surprise at the end, though, when it happens. Yes, it was a big surprise. What was it at the end of the day? It was the stupid watch I wanted from Disney World that I saw when I was there that I threw a fit about two weeks before my birthday. And then you get it, and you're not even like... By the time you get it, you're like,
Great. Yeah. That's awesome. Thank you. Their rationale was I was in school most of the day, so they only tricked me for a couple hours. Let her leave in the morning without saying happy. She's catching the bus like, anything else? Yeah. Sure? Yeah. Just like 16 Candles. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Are you ready, Woodsy? I'm ready. Let's do this. Woodsy said it earlier. Hard week to be picking games. Very much. But Miami is going into Kansas City. Miami has not won a game yet. They're 0-7. And they will be 1-7 by the end of the weekend. I believe that they will win on the road in Kansas City. Yeah, that team is a turd. They're a big, steaming turd. And there's no way they beat Kansas City, who's won four in a row. Tampa Bay heads into New Orleans, who hasn't looked like New Orleans. And because of that, I have to... Still take New Orleans at home. Yeah, me too. They got a rebound from that game last week. Atlanta heads into a winless Indianapolis. That one is a no-brainer for me. Atlanta wins. Also Atlanta. Cleveland goes into Houston, and I believe that Houston is able to do what they need to do to beat a very terrible Cleveland team. Yeah, they're talking about Andre Johnson coming back for Houston, so that'll be good for them. They win at home. Jets are going to Buffalo.
And even though Ryan Fitzpatrick has been on fire, he is facing a tough defense and a great secondary, probably the best in the NFL. I still say Buffalo does it at home. Woodsy? Look at you. I think that the Jets win this game. I believe in Buffalo, and I'd like to see them win because I can't stand the Jets, but I think the Jets take it. San Francisco. And the on-fire 49ers are going into Washington. And I say they take care of business on the road. Yeah, Washington got shut out last week. They got nothing. Nothing. San Francisco wins. Seattle's going to Dallas. And they are a terrible football team. They're only 2-5. Dallas is 3-4. But I say Seattle wins on the road. Yeah, they've got some history together, these two teams. But I've got to root for the hometown Cowboys in this one. I think that they will right the ship against a crap Seattle team. Las Vegas is saying that this is about 50-50 this next game. Cincinnati going to Tennessee. Hardest game of the week to pick. Hardest game of the week to pick, and I'll take Tennessee only because they're at home. I took Cincinnati because they got a little bit better record. I took Cincinnati on the road. The Tim Tebow's go into Oakland and play the Raiders this weekend, and I think the Tebow's lose.
The Raiders win at home. Yeah, Raiders' defense actually looks pretty good. They're pretty mean. So Oakland wins at home. New York Giants to New England. And Bill Belichick ain't going to be had at home. And so he wins at home against the Giants. New England wins. St. Louis and Arizona. In the turd game of the week, they call it the turd bowl. They're both 1-6. St. Louis wins on the road. Yeah, I read this morning Kevin Cobb is probably not going to play for Arizona, which you know who that leaves out there, Matt Leinert. So go St. Louis. St. Louis with the win on the road. My analytical mind says that Green Bay wins here at home against San Diego. I would love for San Diego to trounce them, but my analytical mind says go with the odds, baby. I'm changing my pick. I originally picked Green Bay. I think it's set up nicely for the Chargers to go out and get a win at home. It's time. Now's the time. This is their season. Right here. Go get them. Chicago heads into Philadelphia. Philly! I say, L-O-B, that your Philadelphia Eagles take care of business at home. Yeah, absolutely. The dream team is really playing up to what everybody thought they would be. I think Philly wins. In what should be the lowest scoring game of the week, Baltimore goes to the Steelers. Oh, yeah.
In what should be the lowest scoring game of the week. And I don't think it will be. And I actually am going to take Pittsburgh over Baltimore. I took Pittsburgh too. They're riding high after beating the Pats. And they are at home. They're 6-2. Baltimore's looked like crap the last two weeks. So Steelers take that one. I've been losing every time I bet against the Steelers. It's not wise to bet against the Steelers apparently. So there you go. Jay's recap. See what you make of this. He says Jasper's new bit. His son Jasper is eight years old. Jasper's new bit is to come upstairs when Jay is in the shower and ask him 100 questions. And he says that what they're going to do is he'll ask things like, what, Jay?
He'll ask me questions like, when are we going to go ride our motorcycles? When are we going to do this? When are we going to do that? What's sky blue? He will go on and on and on. So I'm in there trying to shower, soaping up, and he'll even pop the door open just a little bit. He's like, so, because he can't really hear through the big glass wall. He's like, so. Or he'll make faces on the glass. I'm like, hey, dude, how about I get to shower? Yeah. Well, this brings up a very interesting thing because we have been bathing our kids. in our shower since they were born. That's where we've bathed them. They love it. It's nice and steamy, and they love it. Jake still showers with his mom. Now, I never really thought about it, but at what age? I think you're there. No, you're not there. Like 10. Oh, my. Holy. That's too old, Woods? Oh, my God, 10. Well. With boys, I mean, maybe with his mom, like eight or nine. I mean, Jasper will still come up and, I mean, there's nothing. He's not checking his mom out. He's just like, hey, what's going on? And what if he's seen it his whole life? Woods' jaw is dropped to the ground. Now, Woods grew up in a very modest family. Very modest. I kind of did, too. Like, I never saw my dad naked. Never. Never. In my life. Never. I see my mom in a nightgown. I'd be like, oh, God, oh, God, oh, God.
Yeah. My mom's a pretty lady. I would see my dad in his underwear. Still see my dad in his underwear. No. Still see my dad in his underwear. Like boxers or briefs? Briefs. My dad's always been a briefs guy. My dad would watch TV in his underwear. My dad would drop his pants when he was talking to you. He'd be standing there and he'd be like, oh wait, I gotta tuck my shirt in. He'd drop his pants. Yeah, that wouldn't bother me. That wouldn't bother me either. I'll do that right now. You've seen your dad in his underwear, haven't you? Boxers and a t-shirt, but only for like a second. He didn't walk around that way. L.O.B.? No. You never saw your parents in their sleeping gear? I would accidentally walk in on my mom, but that's about it. And was it weird? Because you're both girls. I didn't want to know. I don't want to be able to picture it. Hey, listen. And you know. There are some moms and daughters nowadays, they'll go to the spa together, be naked and all that. Oh, my God. But see, now I think about it. Jake has seen me naked because he's been seeing me naked since he was a kid, like born. But I think Woods might be right. It's time to stop. He's forming memories right now. That is a strong argument right there. As soon as they're at the age that they will have a memory,
Maybe it's time to... And I need help here. 570-1949 from M1s. What is the deal? What would you do? Well, I think you bathe them in the tub or whatever until they're old enough. I'll never shower with my kids. Even if the kid was a baby? Never. What does that matter? No, I'll bathe them in the tub. It's just how I am. But I remember I started taking showers by myself at like four or five. And I mean walking in going... All right, I got the shower. Turn it on. I used to shave in the shower with a butter knife. So it would be a whole process for me. I enjoyed showering by myself. Yeah. I didn't shower with my mom. It's weird. I never showered with my parents. It's weird. They gave me a bath until I was about five, and then I started doing the shower thing. Get my wife on the phone, Jay. But I do think that my family was pretty buttoned up. Us too. Us too. M1 Cornhusker, are you there? Yeah, what up? What's up? I was going to say, I'm 26, so I don't have any kids. But my boss's kid is like seven and a half. And up until like a couple months ago, he would run around naked anywhere and drop his pants. Like we'd just be over having dinner or whatever. And he'd come out of the shower, running around. But now he will not let anyone near him when he's going to the bathroom.
Really? It was like a button got turned on. Well, see, I'm constantly telling my wife, can you put something on that kid? Yeah, he likes to be nude. Yeah, he runs around. Hey, this isn't the Garden of Eden. Yeah. All right? Put a fig leaf on. Isn't it? Will you? How about a loincloth here? Something. Help me out a little bit. Put some underpants on. That kid will crawl up on the bed. I'm like, ah! Oh! Oh! And he just laughs. He's giggling. I'm like, hey, man, it ain't funny. Go put on some pants. I don't mean underpants. I mean pants. Put on a suit. Yeah, put on a three-piece suit, will you? It's freaking gross already. I don't like the naked kids because I feel like there's going to be an accident. I want at least underwear on. Yeah. I just don't want... Plus, isn't it kind of... Isn't it? It is. Not the little babies. Yes, man. Not the diapers. No. Toddlers, L.O.B., don't let them run around in diapers. What does it matter what it looks like if you're at home? Like Britney Spears' kids. Yes, man. Oh, they love it. If it's the daytime, like we wear clothes, why don't they wear clothes? Throw a freaking Irish jersey on the kid. Let him run around. Yeah, man. They love to be naked. We love to let them be naked. Yeah.
My parents, I can tell, they're always wondering, like, why? Why are they running around like that? Naked. Naked. 570-1949. Give us a call and tell us what you think. Do I just take them? Are you recording? I'm trying to call your wife and can't do it all. I've got your wife ringing on the other line. I swear to God, keep pushing me. Yeah. Keep it up. You know what, buddy? I put the stick in the cage. You know what? Chris didn't have to leave to go get me breakfast. No, he didn't. One of us does push-ups during commercial breaks. The other one of us shoves garbage in his mouth. Every day. I'll just answer the phones and produce and all that and be hot. Anything else you need, Your Honor? Look, Deacon, I can't answer the phones and do everything you need me to do, all right?
Reverend. Excuse me, your highness. I'm sorry. Do you need your shoes, Sean, too? Fix your sandwich, too. M1, Rob, are you there? I'm here. Okay, what's the deal with the naked kids? I'm a five-year-old, and the rules at the house go like this. Two years old, okay. Okay. My house likes to run around naked. Everybody likes to run around naked in my house. You, your wife, the kids, everybody? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a commune. Okay, so do you? That's the question. That was not convincing. That sounded like, yes, we do, but I'm embarrassed to say it. Right. Put a robot on it.
Who are you? You have nerds. What? Come on. Hide your stuff. It's making me feel dirty. Okay, fine. I do certain things, and then there's certain things like that Seinfeld episode. You can't change a bike tire. Nobody looks good changing a tire. Yeah, that's true. Just keep some clothes on. You're fine. Well, and I have zero problems with our two-year-old seeing us. Are you kidding? Come on. Yeah, they don't know. I have zero problems with any of my kids seeing me. Maddie, your 22-year-old. She walks in the shower. I mean, if she walks in there and needs to get something out, as long as she's not, like, looking. Hey, wait. Woods, would you have a problem with his 22-year-old daughter, Maddie, seeing him in his underwear? Yeah. Shirtless? Shirtless? Yeah. Yeah, it's weird. You're a crazy person. It's weird. Oh, come on. Dude, really? Well, again, depends if it's boxers or briefs. It's her pop. First of all, Jay doesn't wear underwear, so it's a moot point. Okay. But if he did. If he did. Yeah. Briefs, yes. Briefs, absolutely have a problem with it. It's filthy. Yeah. It's filthy. Yeah, I don't know. Plus, our bodies are not. I mean, God made our bodies. They're a temple. This is M1 Jake's teacher. What do you think? Coming from a preschool perspective, it's around five years old where they start noticing the differences.
Between boys and girls? Yeah. And like you were saying before, they start getting those, they start building those memories. So I would say around five years old is when you need to stop. I saw my mom naked when I was five and it was weird. Exactly. And by the way, the naked kids thing, that's totally, sorry Mikey, it's a Hispanic thing. The naked kids? Yes. No. You mean not wanting them naked? Not wanting them naked. Okay, fine. I'll turn it around. I'll say... I must be Hispanic then. Yeah, Woods must be Hispanic because he says put some clothes on that kid. It looks like WT. It does not. It does. It does not. I see a kid... In a ratty diaper? Yes, a kid running around with a diaper hanging between his legs, almost to his knees, running around barefoot in the front yard, and I'm like... Oh, come on with that. Cutes. Come on, man. If it's in your house, I don't see any problem with it. And I know all of my Hispanic friends, they're like, get socks on that kid, get clothes on that kid. Yeah. Tuxedo. Yeah, tux. Poncho. Poncho. Poncho, sombrero. Hello. Babe, where is Jake's freaking sombrero? That kid's running around nude. Get his poncho on, too. I want it all on.
570-1949. Wait until I tell you what this guy has. It's taken him 10 years to invent it. It has to do with your eyes and their color. And it is, it's insane. Mikey Show on FM 94.9. The countdown has begun. Only one day to go. It's the official kickoff to San Diego Beer Week this Saturday afternoon at Liberty Station. FM 94.9 and Napa Auto Parts presents the San Diego Brewers Guild Festival. This is the ultimate craft beer festival showcasing all 32 members of the guild. Drink legendary and award-winning beers. Meet the Brewers. Stone. Ballast Point. Green Flash. Port. Carl Strauss. Lost Abbey. Manzanita. Backstreet. New English. Lightning. Mother Earth. Breakwater. On the Tracks. Hess. And more. Rock out all day. Help us celebrate our night.
9th anniversary with two stages of music. Performing on the FM 94.9 anniversary stage. Matthew Sweet. Telekinesis. Stone Foxes. On the local 94.9 stage. The Bloody Hollies. Dead Feather Moon. Family Wagon. Advanced tickets for the general session are $35. This price includes beer and music. The ticket price will increase the day of, so get them now at FM949SD.com. It's our ninth anniversary and the official kickoff to Beer Week. It's the San Diego Brewers Guild Festival. See you Saturday. Get your tickets and details at FM949SD.com. Are you looking for the absolute best place to buy a pair of high-quality, brand-name sheepskin boots or slippers and at the best price? Boot World is San Diego's home of sheepskin, and I'm here to tell you why.
This is Ed Stone, president of Boot World. Boot World has the largest selection of the most popular, quality, brand-name sheepskin. Ugg Australia, Aussie Dogs, Stahikam, and Old Friend. You'll find a huge selection of all the classics and lots of unique styles to help you make your own personal statement without driving all over town. Plus, Boot World has carefully selected and priced our sheepskin boots and slippers to have the absolute finest product in each price range. This is quality that will be enjoyed for years to come. Boot World wants to help you get the sheepskin footwear you want, so don't wait. Come in now to Boot World while the selection of boots and slippers for men, women, and children are at their best. You'll find the sheepskin you want at San Diego's home of sheepskin. Boot World on Convoy in Kearney Mesa, Plaza Camino Real in Carlsbad, San Marcos, El Cajon, Chula Vista, Midway Drive, and bootworld.com. M1 Lily, are you there? Hello. You called AIS, and what happened? Well, I called them because I called my regular car insurance to pay my six-month premium, and it almost doubled before I even, I don't even exactly know why. Once I found out, it seemed to be a big surprise to me as to why it increased. So I remember hearing AIS all the time on the Mikey show, so I go ahead and give them a call, and within like half an hour, AIS found a company that had the same coverage.
half the price of the new premium of my old insurance. So they ended up saving me like $600 in 25 minutes. That's amazing. And that is a real story. And the number is 1-800-777-4AIS, 1-800-777-4247. Were you kind of kicking yourself like, why didn't I do this sooner? Well, I was really happy with that. insurance. I didn't know about AIS at all. And then all of a sudden I called the agent just to pay my bill and out of nowhere got this increase and I thought, yeah, why don't I do this sooner? That's awesome. Lily, thank you so much for the call. We appreciate it. Thank you. We'll see you. My favorite instrument is the triangle. My favorite flavor is caramel. My favorite animal is the seahorse. My favorite word is undulating. My favorite parent is my mom. Sorry, dad. My favorite McCafe drink? I can't pick just one. Come take a fresh look at McCafe's luscious beverages made just for you with real whipped cream, rich chocolate, and drizzled indulgently with caramel. Whether it's the new caramel hot chocolate or an iced or hot caramel mocha, stop in today to find your new favorite, the simple joy of caramel at participating McDonald's. Listen to this. What? You know what? You better sit down. But we're in an elevator. Trust me. Sit down. Fine. Ow. Oh, sorry. It's okay. It's back. What's back? It. You mean? Yep.
Awesome. Excuse me, what's back? McRib. Tender pork. Slathered and tangy barbecue sauce. Pickles. Onions. Toasted bun. I love McRib. Can I get your number? The McRib sandwich is back for a limited time. Just $2.79, only at McDonald's. Price and participation may vary. Hey, gang, it's your old pal, Woodsy. I've got to tell you about the FM 94.9 Pigskin Pick'em. It is awesome. We have teamed up with Expressly Gourmet, and you can show off your football smarts and win some really cool stuff. If you pick the most right against Mikey, Hillary, me, and the rest of the FM 94.9 jocks, you can score a $50 gift certificate to Expressly Gourmet. What they'll do, they bring restaurants from all over San Diego right to your door. Check out expresslygourmet.com for yourself. Think about it. You get to go head to head with me, Hanson, Mikey, Hillary, and show us what you've got, okay? And then you can enjoy some of San Diego's best restaurants. You don't even have to leave your doorstep. Sign up now.
Join in the fun of the FM 94.9 pigskin pick'em today at fm949sd.com. If you pick the most right, you can score a $50 gift certificate to Expressly Gourmet. From Expressly Gourmet and FM 94.9. We're celebrating Jerome's 57th anniversary with an all-new anniversary mattress that's unbeatable. With pocketed springs, perimeter foam encasement, and a comfortable European pillow top. All at my Jerry's price of just $5.99. Buy it online right now at jeromes.com. Hey there, football fans. It's L.O.B., and I want you to join me at Dave & Buster's for Monday Night Football. That's right. I'll be out there. And guess who's playing? The Bears? Versus my beloved Eagles. That's right. Come see me in action. I'm going to be on my best behavior, just like any true Philly fan. Kickoff is at 520. I'm going to be there from 5 to 7. We're going to be giving away tickets to SeaWorld. We have CDs. We have t-shirts. Plus, we have Dave and Buster's power cards. Come on out. Let's play some games. Let's watch some football. Let's eat some food. Drink some beer. All the info you need at fm949sd.com.
This report brought to you by the 99 cents only stores. Time to mail your holiday greeting cards. 99 cents only stores makes it easy. They've got a huge assortment of boxed holiday greeting cards for only 99.99 cents. Okay, the freeways, the 94 westbound before College Groveway. We've got sheets of particle board in the right lanes. Careful as you go through there. National City, 805 northbound between Plaza Boulevard, Imperial Avenue. That's pretty slow. And it looks like something's stuck here in Chula Vista on the 805 southbound before Auto Park Drive, Main Street. a vehicle stuck in the center divider. This report brought to you by Sharp. For health care the way it should be, make sure your health insurance plan will let you choose Sharp. Call 1-800-82-SHARP or visit sharp.com. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. It's time for the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Sir Shedd with the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report for a Friday morning.
We're going to have to kick off for the Wednesday Surf Club's 50th reunion and celebration. So step on by and check it out. Tickets available at the door. Fun and games for everybody. Surfwise today, we've got some, but unfortunately, along with that south-southwest pretty swell, there's a cold front moving in, and that is giving us some strong south winds that are pretty much blowing out just about everywhere. While you can find me to waste just that way is just about all spots. a few spots that are protected from those winds, manmade structures and natural code areas or so forth can be a bit cleaner. But it's looking like those winds are going to turn more westerly as the day continues as well. So opportunities for go out or going to be fading quickly for up to the minute surf reports forecast. Go to surf line dot com and for surfboard repair and restoration needs. Go see Joe and ask for the bird deal. The Authentic Surf Report can be heard three times daily right here on FM 94.9. This has been the FM 94.9 Authentic Surf Report. Back to the Mikey Show. Tickets, please. With Mikey. I'm a pretty honest guy, and I've been a pretty honest guy for many years. Woods. I'll never forget it as long as I live. It was some village in Africa. She had...
Like 60 of those rings are on her neck and just boobs hanging out. Lauren. You know what I think the scariest thing is about clowns? They don't say anything. Yeah, that's great. Even though they can talk. And Jay. Just a man trying to do the right thing. On FM 94.9. I have to find this video that I saw. I gotta find it. I'll post it on our website. It's fantastic. It's this white kid. He's probably 20. If I had a guess, he'd be 20. And he reviews electronics in his bedroom. And he is as white as white gets. Blue eyes, you know. Blue eyes. And he is...
He really hates Beats headphones. Sorry to you people that really like Dr. Dre, but these are terrible headphones, okay? First of all, the decibel does not go up high enough for you to be able to properly hear it. There is distortion. Now, I'm not saying that I hate Dr. Dre. And by the way, all the comments that I get are either one of two things. Either... You're totally right. Or it's from the nerds. And they're like, you don't know anything about impedance. Or it's... Oh, my God. Yeah. And he goes, or it's, hey, man, why you be talking about Dr. Dre like that? Bleep, bleep, bleep. Wow. I'm going to post this. I was mesmerized by it. You all right, Woods? Are you okay? Is everything all right? What's going on? What's happening? I have a cold coming. My chest is burning. Oh, no. Oh, wow, Woods. Woods is... He's experiencing technical difficulties. Big time. He really is. The cold coming on. It's burning. It's really burning my chest. Is it a cold or is it something more sinister than a cold? It's just a cold, Keith Morrison. You say that, but then last week you took a trip all by yourself into the wild.
Didn't you, Woods? Played golf on Friday. Oh, well, you told everyone you played golf. But the truth is you went into Antarctica, didn't you, Woods? Nope. Was it Chula Vista? Oh, it seemed like a believable story. I'm going to Chula Vista. And everybody believed it because, of course, that's what Woods does. He goes to Chula Vista. Yeah. But as it turned out, he carried his iPhone with him, which had a GPS device on it. And when it was checked, it turns out Woods didn't go. Anywhere near Chula Vista. As a matter of fact. I have pictures of me in Chula Vista. Well, he had doctored pictures of him in Chula Vista. That much was for sure. But where woods were, it really was. Antarctica. That's where he swallowed a bug. Riding on a motorcycle in Antarctica. Swallowed a bug that actually turned out to be something more than just a bug, wasn't it? You got me, Keith. What poor woods had swallowed in that bug was some sort of incredible alien. And as it grew, he knew the alien was festering inside of him. His wife, Jamie, even said to him at one point, Dear, are you sure that's not an alien in your chest? It's a cold. No, just a cold, he said. Nothing a little Tylenol cold burst won't help. Then while he was driving home, that Copenhagen...
Stirred something inside of his chest that no one expected. Right out of Wood's chest. Let's see. 570-1949 is the number. And we would love to talk to you. I told you about this thing with the brown eyes that a doctor has come up with. It's taken him 10 years to be able to come up with this. And it has to do with your eye color. This thing is still not working properly. Here we go. This is a nice way of showing it. You can see the layer on top. Dr. Greg Homer says he can turn your brown eyes blue with a simple procedure that takes just 20 seconds. It's possible, according to Homer, because even brown-eyed people have blue eyes underneath the brown layer of pigment. We use a laser that's tuned to a specific frequency to remove the pigment.
From the surface of the iris. Screaming. Yeah, you're screaming, lady. They showed it. We don't. Yeah, scrap shoot. To be quite frank with you, we don't, no. Well, you look good. Yeah, looks good. until they fall out. ...sophisticated to make sure that no tissues are damaged, and there's no sign of it whatsoever. Is it possible something comes down the road? It's possible. The procedure is still in its testing phase, but if and when it becomes commercially available, Homer believes it will be popular. Thousands of people have already emailed him, describing why they want to make their brown eyes blue. The eyes are the windows to the soul. So this idea that people can actually see into it, a blue eye is not opaque. You can see deeply. into it. And a brown eye is very opaque. And I think that there is something meaningful about this idea of having open windows to the soul. Or I just want to make an S-load of money. That's the other reason that I'm going to make an S-load. I'm actually going to buy an island. What reason could you state other than you just want blue eyes? Well, that's it. Well, here's the thing. I've never matched my eyes with my hair color or my skin color.
The reason I'm writing you today, Dr. Homer, is because my child has brown eyes, or excuse me, my child has blue eyes, and I have brown. And when we walk into the grocery store, people say to me, is the father of this child really who you say it is? And I'm just sick of it. Immortified. Devastated. All of us have blue eyes with brown eyes. If we have brown eyes, we all have blue eyes. It's underneath the surface. Didn't know that. Yeah, they burn off the brown layer. A lot of babies have those. They're born with those deep blue eyes, and then they change. Jake had the bluest of blue eyes, and it lasted for seven months, and then they turned brown. Did it bother you guys? It bothered me. It did? Mm-hmm. Why? Because I thought it was rad. Yeah, but brown eyes are great. Yeah. You got nice browns. I got nice browns. My oldest brother has blue eyes and brown hair. I think it's a fantastic combination. I've always thought it's really handsome. Then the twins were born. With blue eyes. I said, well, that ain't going to last. It has. So the boys have blue eyes. And it's Rebecca, you know, it's Rebecca that's got the blue. Oh, yeah, she does. Deep blue. Beautiful. Honey, I don't know what you're saying. Stare for hours into them. Gazing deep into her eyes. I don't understand you. Just longingly looking. Dude! Eye to eye. Nose to nose. Lips.
Connie, I don't know what you're saying. I need to take a shower. He's such a creep. I need to take a shower after that. Sex pervert. That crossed the line. Oh, did it? I think it did. That was too much. Did it? That's pillow talk. M1 Max from Santee, what was the word of the day? That is correct. You are going to see City in Color Tuesday night. Hang on the line. Would you do it, bro? Bro Namath, would you change your eyes? Yes. You would! What's wrong with it? The risk. Yeah, it's your eyes. A lot of risk. Oh, there's no way of knowing the long-term effects. Yeah. That's exactly what the guy said. Look how beautiful my blue eyes are. I can't see them, but you just tell me how they look. You tell me how they are. I will tell you this. I do have this thing in me that goes, they're professional. They wouldn't do it if it wasn't going to work.
All kinds of problems from all kinds of medicines they give you and stuff. I would never change my eye color. Ever. I like my eyes the way they are. Wow. Be happy who you are. Yeah. Now, I'd get my chin sucked out, but that's a different story. Yeah. I'm actually planning on getting my chin sucked out. I'd get a reduction, Mike. Yeah. Yeah. My back's killing me. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I can't walk around with it. Yeah. I would definitely. I mean, that's the only thing that I and my wife have. Really wanted. As an elective surgeon. Kim's actually saving for it right now for me. That's right. She got an open to flex spending account for that reason. Yeah, and we're just kind of hoping because it's a curse. It's a curse. It's what it is. I'm just going to donate to those less fortunate. Like you. Yeah, like you. Oh, man. Yo mama. Yo mama. I found the funniest yo mama joke. I have to read you this joke. I got some good ones. Somebody sent me the funniest Yo Mama joke. Let's do a Yo Mama contest. 570-1949. You ever just go off the grid? Yeah. It's Friday, man. Let's have fun. Let's be loose. Loosey-goosey. You throw one at me, I'll throw one back. All right. Yo Mama's so fat, Woods, that she has an X painted on her chest so the helicopter knows where to land. Yo Mama's so fat she gets her nails done at Earl Scheib.
What is that? Earl's house. Earl's house. Earl's house. It's a paint place. They paint cars. Yeah, they advertise. For like 40 bucks. Yeah. Her belt size is the equator. The equator. That's funny. Her blood type's Rocky Road. Mm-hmm. She went to get blood, and syrup came out. Mama's got a wooden leg with a kickstand. M1, Rachel? Are you there? Are you there? This is Rachel from Poway, and I'm going to let you do a Yo Mama off with... M1J from San Diego. Are you there, Jay? I'm there, man. How are you? Good. Okay. I'm going to give the ladies first. I'm going to let ladies start first. And you guys take it away. Better be good. All right. Your mama's so fat. When she went to the movie, she sat next to everyone. I got one better. I got one better. Your mama's so greasy, she used bacon as a Band-Aid.
That's pretty good. Your mama's so greasy, she sweats Crisco. Your mama's so fat that when she diagnosed with a flesh-eating disease, the doctor gave her 10 years to live. Your mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tongue's in jail. Wow. Okay, okay. I got you, I got you. Your mama's so fat that she has more roles than Towne's Bakery. Okay. Your mama's so poor, when I saw her kicking a can down the street after what she was doing, she said, moving. Oh, everyone says that one. Everyone's all right. Your mama's so hairy, Bigfoot took a picture of her. Oh, shoot. All right. Your mama's so poor, when she went to McDonald's, she put a milkshake on layaway. That's fantastic. That's fantastic.
Your mama's so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick the other people's fingers. Your mama's so poor that she has a duck's throwing bread at her. Wait. Oh, I get it. The duck's throwing bread at her. Your mama's so fat I ran around her twice and got lost. Wow. Your mama's so hairy. You almost died of rug burn at birth. Oh! And a winner. Wait, she won? You got any more? Oh, I got more. Oh, your mom is so fat, she's got chins that Hong Kong got a phone book. That's so old. Your mom is so yellow, traffic slows down when she smiles. Oh, man. Your mama's so stupid it took her two hours to watch 60 Minutes. Your mama's so fat, she eats Wheat Fix. Oh, there it is. That's the classic. That's the classic. I'll give it to her. Fine. Ah, the genius of the Wheat Fix. Thank you. M1 Wheat Fix. M1 Rachel. Congratulations. Hang on the line. Something funny about white.
Girls just telling yo mama jokes. And going, uh-huh. All right. All right. All right. I love it. Woods brought something up yesterday that I thought was fantastic. He does not like the phrase. Because L.O.B. was saying it, like, not even to him, just in a course of conversation. And he stopped her and he's like, I don't like that. I have a bone to pick with you. Oh, my God. Mm-mm. Now, I said... I think I have a bone to pick with you is cute. Oh, yeah. It's non-confrontational. Are you kidding? No. Well, nobody goes, hey, I am not kidding. I have a bone to pick with you. Oh, yeah, they do. Hell, yes, they do. I've never heard it used that way. I hear it. L-O-B, you do it. I said, hey, I have a bone to pick with you. Yeah, and you know she's being cute. Yeah, she's trying to be cute, but when I hear I've got a bone to pick with you, that means what did I do to you?
And I'm immediately defensive. Well, yeah, that's the gist. Okay, give me an example of something. Like, I didn't cut a spot I was supposed to. I don't think that's when you would use it, though. Someone wasn't answering me. Yep. I have a bone pick with you. I left a bag of Doritos in the fridge, and they are gone today. How about this? Hey, did you eat my Doritos? You would never do that. Yes, I would. I don't do the preemptive, like, hey, I'm going to be cute and funny, but I'm really being a jerk. What about this? Would you go like this? You see people's Doritos? Yeah, I would do that, too. Hey, man, you just eat people's Doritos? I think it's a way to deflect if you're possibly hurt or insecure. Because this person hadn't answered two emails and a text from me. And I was like... I have a bone to pick with you. Hey, I have a bone to pick with you. I don't like it. God, I don't like it. Woods does not like a bone to pick with you. You don't either, Jay? No. No. I'm immediately... Oh, grow up. Why don't you say, hey, you didn't answer my email. Why didn't you answer my email? Because I'm being funny and cute. Are you? But you're not feeling funny and cute. You're mad. No, I'm not mad. I have a bone to pick with you. If you're genuinely not mad, it's probably okay. But if you use it in the, hey, I got a bone to pick with you. You're a jerk. You don't need it. What other phrases?
Do you have any that drive you nuts? Somebody says that phrase and you're like, oh boy, what a hat. I do. I do. Several. Do you have a bunch? Yeah, excuse me. Gets me. Excuse me? Excuse me? Yeah. Oh, dude. You're going to get slapped. It's only girls that say excuse me. Guys do not say excuse me. Oh, there are guys. Uppity guys that say it. Excuse me? Excuse me? How about calm down? Relax. Yeah, relax and calm down. I will strangle you. Yeah, the last thing that you're going to do is relax or calm down. First of all, why don't you relax? Oh, my God. Or just the, hey, hey, relax. Oh, my God. I didn't take the. How about take a breath? The can't be bothered guy. Like, he's so calm and composed. He's like Tom Brady. Yeah. Take a breath. Oh, slap you in your mouth. I can't stand it. I don't like it either. I don't like hold the phone, but just because I don't like it. Get her on the horn. How about that? On the horn? That doesn't bother me. Get her on the horn. On the horn is... Ciao. Ciao. Ciao. Describe that personality. Who is the ciao guy? I know a ciao guy. Who is he? What's he like? What's his personality traits? It's funny. I went to...
He was in Chicago, and I lived there. And he was friends with all my other friends. Grew up in the same area, okay? Same neighborhood. Didn't migrate here from Europe. Born there. Right. So he's not from Italy. Not only is he a chow guy, he's a kiss-on-both-cheek guy. First time he ever met my wife at a wedding, he gave her the... I can't send him already. And when he left, chow. His name's Felix. Oh, Felix. I'll murder him. I know that guy. He's the kiss on the cheek. I'm like, hey, you grew up in freaking Oak Brook, Illinois, okay? He's disgusted by the fact that you drink Budweiser. There's no question. Felix. thinks that you are an animal. There's no question. He and I never got along. Ever got along. You know why? Dude says chow. Yes. You don't say chow. And means it. And means it. He says chow and he means it. You know who? Even James Spader's like, you're a douche, okay? And you kissed my wife on both cheeks. Yeah, I don't know who you think. You're not from France, okay? The guy's been to like...
Four different, he went to film school, he went to art school. I think he's in New York now doing club promotions. He's that guy. I know that guy. He's that guy. He's also produced a couple of ballets just for the money. Yeah, just for the money. He does a lot of name dropping, I'm sure. Oh, yes. His parents actually own a Frank Lloyd Wright house. Oh, gosh. I've been inside a house that Frank Lloyd Wright designed and built. And have been inside it. I mean, it's badass. But that's the kind of dough this kid grew up with. Oh, wow. So he is like, hey, I'm spinning this weekend down at Slam if you want to come down. I'll put you on the list. Cool. But I got to go. Ciao. Yeah, I got to go. Ciao. That is not my kind of guy, dude. I don't like the after you or ladies first when you've gone and done something first. It's one of those situations where everyone's kind of looking at the plate of food and you decide that you're going to be the first one to go and someone's like, oh, after you. Oh, God. That guy? That guy. Ladies first. I hate that guy. You know what you should do next time? L.O.B. is very dramatically throw the plate back.
No, you first. No, no, no, no. After you. I insist. I insist. Have you ever gotten into the I insist off? No, no, no. Go ahead. No, you really. No, I insist. No, you go. You go. No, really. I'm going to be mad if you don't. Yeah. Just go. Please just go. Relax. Usually at a four-way stop. No, you go. No, you go. Obviously, it's more important to you, so just go. Oh, that one. It's more important to you anyway. Hey, that's not going anywhere. Where's the fire? Oh, that's a good one. I will use that on a plane. I'll use that one on a plane out loud. You can't use that on a plane. No, no, no. When you land. No, he's like, I like to scream fire. Yeah. No, no, you can. When you land and the guy that is in row 15. Yeah. You're in row nine. Can't stand him. He tries to go past row nine. I go, hey, where's the fire, pal? You shouldn't say that on a plane. Not on a plane. I didn't say where's the bomb. Don't say that either. Well, you just did. But I'm not on a plane. What are you, Bombadier? Yeah, what are you, Bombadier? Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb. Last night on Jeopardy, a very interesting answer was given to what is a love triangle? It's pretty spicy. Also, we got a great email. And your phone call is 570-1949. I always have to look my sexiest. That's why I'm wearing these tight size 42.
Be a part of the show. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm sorry, our time is up. FM 94.9. One of the most anticipated annual concerts is back. FM 94.9 Holiday Hootenanny. Presented by Coors Light. Saturday night, December 3rd at Jenny Craig Pavilion on the University of San Diego campus. Starring the band heralded by Rolling Stone, Spin, Pitchfork, and the New York Times as the best live band in America. My Morning Jacket. Morning Jacket. Also featuring Two Door Cinema Club. And Kim. Delta Spirit. The Blackout Party tickets are on sale now. Get yours at tickets.com, the Jenny Craig Pavilion box office on the USD campus, or FM949SD.com. The FM949 Holiday Hootenanny 2011 is presented by Coors Light and supported by Spy Optics. Join us on Saturday night, December 3rd for an epic evening of music with FM949. Good things come in threes, like three days of huge savings.
Don't miss the three-day sale this Friday, Saturday, and Sunday at Vaughn's. When you spend $75 or more in a single transaction with Vaughn's Club, you'll get a $10 reward coupon for your next purchase. Stock up and save big this weekend. And keep the savings adding up. Check out these amazing Vaughn's Club deals, good only through Sunday. Rancher's Reserve Boneless Beef New York Steak is only $5.99 a pound in the Extreme Value Pack. Driscoll's Red Raspberries are two for $3, 5.6 ounce size. And it's your last week to stock up and save on wines for all your holiday needs before the sale. Stock up and save big this weekend. And keep the savings adding up. Check out these amazing Vons Club deals, good only through Sunday. Rancher's Reserve Boneless Beef New York Steak is only $5.99 a pound in the Extreme Value Pack. Driscoll's Red Raspberries are two for $3, 5.6-ounce size. And it's your last week to stock up and save on wines for all your holiday needs before the sale ends. Use Vons Club and get 30% off all wine in the store. Plus, save an extra 10% when you've bought six. Load up for the weekend. Stock up for the celebrations ahead. Don't miss the three-day sale this weekend only. Vons, ingredients for life. Coupon expires November 13th. See store for details and list of excluded items. Vons Club required. At Romano's Macaroni Grill, the ladies are back for their usual table. Second time this week. Not hard to do when there's 25 new menu items to try, like the fresh pasta carbonara or tender pan-seared bronzino.
From the looks of it, the pan-roasted pork chop is juicy. But the gossip is even juicier. It's something new. Something classic. On the new menu at Romano's Macaroni Grill. Channel 4's San Diego. Your home for Aztecs football. Catch super sophomore Ronnie Hillman and record-setting quarterback Ryan Lindley as they set their sights on the Mountain West Championship. Don't miss a minute of live gridiron action as the Aztecs battle UNLV, 7 p.m. Saturday on Channel 4 San Diego. Everything Aztecs, everything Chargers. The Saquon Casino postgame show, weeknights at 10 on Channel 4 San Diego. This report, it's brought to you by Kohl's Department Store. Don't miss Kohl's Power Shopping Sale today, Saturday, and Sunday. Get a head start on the holidays with Kohl's most powerful prices throughout the store. The more you know, the more you Kohl's. Kohl's expect great things. Back up here on the 94 westbound right before College Grove Way due to sheets of particle board that are in the right lanes. National City, the 805 northbound between Plaza Boulevard, Imperial Avenue, very slow. Traveling through Escondido on the 15 southbound between Center City Parkway and...
Rancho Bernardo Road, you've also got some delays. This report brought to you by the San Diego Chargers. Chargers fans, there's still a chance to bold up. You can pick up your tickets for the Chargers' final four home games. Just log on to chargers.com or call 1-877-CHARGERS. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Mikey. Everybody freaks out about guns and stuff. I don't freak out about them because my brother, I grew up around them. My brother had them the whole time I was growing up, so I don't freak out about guns. I like them. Woods. I flooded an entire Hampton Inn. Lauren. I used to be really into the Grateful Dead. Fantastic. And like the Nob Chompa. And Jay. I don't want to miss somebody calling this like, hey, let's go serve. Or let's go do something. Oh, Jay, shut up. This is the Mikey Show. Can you believe him? On FM 94.9. It's Mikey's show on a Friday with a live studio audience. That's what I'm talking about. There is a guy in New York City that is going to be suing the guy that took pictures at his wedding for $4,100 because he doesn't believe that the quality of the photographs was good enough. Now, the only problem is it was six years ago.
He also wants $48,000 to recreate the wedding and fly the participants to New York. Oh, my. Only problem with that is that he and his wife actually divorced, and she now lives back in her native Latvia. So, just kind of strange, you know? I don't know how the judge is going to really... I think it's going to look something like this. Yeah. Just throwing it. Maybe it's just a romantic gesture. Yes. To show how much he wants her back. Try to get her back. Yeah, it's a bad I want you back. I don't know why he keep calling about wedding. I don't even marry him anymore. I actually forgot about him until he did this. Me and Vladimir, we make new life. Yeah. It's been really for four years now. Oh, my goodness. I had forgot his last name, even though it was mine for a few years. Woods, what's going on in sports? Well, if you're a college football fan, you live for weekends like this. Top-ranked LSU will tangle with second-ranked Alabama. Both teams are 8-0. They are calling it the game of the century. It is going to be a freaking... It's going to be a mess, dude. It's going to be awesome. Game time is Saturday at 5 o'clock. It's No. 1 against No. 2. Both teams undefeated. It's going to be awesome. Also, Indianapolis Colts quarterback Peyton Manning says...
His neck is still not strong enough to even get him on the field to practice this year. He's just in bad shape, as is his team. They have not won yet. They are 0-8. Holy cow. Yeah, dude. I'm not used to that. I got a great email that we're going to do for you here in just a second that we'll have you call in about. These are some of the top gross things. Flight attendancy. All right, some of the top gross things that fly to Tendency. Oh, and don't forget, 8.50 this morning, L.O.B. and I on television on CW6, and we give relationship advice. Should I just go out and hang out with Jay? Jay. Do you have room for me out there? Yeah, come on out. You and I will hang out. Cool. Maybe we'll have some breakfast or something. Hey, let's do our own TV show. Four minutes. Four minutes. We should. We'll do our own TV show. Two minutes. Remember when you guys were on Wipeout and we all came and watched you for an hour? Yeah, we're going to drive to L.A. What Jay and I will do is we'll film Jay and Wood's Creepy Minute. Yeah. And we'll put that on that thing. We'll do our own deal. Thanks for your support. Yeah, it's going to be on Fox. Thanks for your support, guys. It'll be awesome. Oh. Uh-oh. Wood said to me this morning. Hey.
When was the Mikey Minute yesterday? No, she did. I did. Wasn't me. Wasn't me. Yeah, Mike. Did you put up your Mikey Minute? I didn't say it. I was looking forward to it. I was too. I really look forward to it. You're a very talented guy. You're very funny. Thank you. Everybody likes to peer into what's going on at your house. That's right. That's right. Some of the top gross things flight attendants have seen passengers do on airplanes. I can only imagine. Breast pumping. That's not gross. It's necessary. It's beautiful. Maybe pre-pump. How about that? How about... No. Yeah, pre-pump. How about maybe your boobs are going to explode if you don't pump them? Go in the bathroom. You get one of those tents. Oh, that sounds real comfortable. And safe. Take up the bathroom for everybody else for 15 minutes. I don't care if they do the tent. Do you care? No, if they do the tent. I just want to see some... Yeah. Don't you? Well, fair enough, actually. Not really. Now that I think about it. Not really. A boob's still a boob, I love it. Well, not when it's all stretched and contorted. I don't know. How about this one? You know how they give you the blankets on the flights? Yeah. One of the top gross things that flight attendants get is boogers on the thing. Guilty. Yeah. What? Passenger in first class rang the call light and handed this lady a blanket and asked if she could get a new one. And she didn't really understand because everybody had been given a fresh blanket and she looked down at the blanket and it was all wet and slimy with boogers. And she thought she was good.
Much like I feel now. Yeah. Impromptu snacking is one of the gross things, which we've talked about, when people bring their own snacks. Woods does not like that bit at all. What is wrong with that? Yeah, eating KFC on a plane, you're a monster. Or eating Subway sandwich on a plane. I'm being held captive. I need food. It smells delicious. Yeah, nothing like the smell of fresh salami and feet on a plane. It's no different than the... Fake sandwiches they give you on there. Salami, you know, capicola. Smells so good. In a tube. Okay, I'll tell you when it does get bad is when they put dressing on it. Italian dressing on a plane is not good. No, dude. No Italian dressing on an airplane. No dressing. It's a stance. It's a stance to the airlines to say, hey. Give me back that meal and I won't have to do this. It's a stance to 227 others as well. It says F you guys. I don't care. I'm occupying that seat. You guys are either with or against me. Eat whatever you want. McDonald's guy. And listen, nobody likes McDonald's more than I do. But on the plane, that stuff stinks. Says the guy who dips on the plane. And fart! I fart on the plane, but that's because nobody can tell. But no, don't eat your sandwich.
Nobody can tell. I'm going to have this open bottle of spit just oozing all around. It's not open. How do you spit into it? It's got a cap on it. I open it, spit, and cap it every time because I don't want to spill it. I am always the – this isn't gross, but it's inappropriate. I'm always the guy that gets up when I'm not supposed to because I don't realize it. I don't realize it. It's a thing. It's right there. If that sucker's clicked, you don't get up. I always think it's okay, and I'm always told that I need to sit back down. You're the – the thing's – tilted towards the ground. Mike's like, I gotta pee. Yeah, 45 degree angle. I'm like, trying to walk up. Oh, you monster. Yeah, and the lady's like, sir, please. Do you know how uncomfortable that makes everybody? I know, I get real upset. Plus, with your goatee, your balls. Dude, use your head. The Arabic look, the whole Arabic look. That's sleeved up. They're like, this guy doesn't care. Yeah, they instantly land the plane. Same deal every time, though. Yes. It's gonna be a good 10 minutes after takeoff before you can get up. I'm the guy that will nap, wake up. Lights come back on to say, don't get up. And I get up. Are you the guy in the middle that's like, excuse me? Yeah. But the good thing is I'm so skinny that I just scoot right by everybody. But do you try to not wake people up and just climb over them? There's that guy. You have to. You gotta wake them up. You can't climb over somebody. Oh, I've been climbed over many times. You can't. And you've been on the plane. Gosh darn. Those are synonymous. That was pretty good.
Here's another gross thing that the flight attendants have seen. People giving themselves pedicures. Yeah, take the socks off, just start cutting the toenails, man. You know what happens to that person? They've seen people using the pedi-egg. Scrubbing? Scrubbing the bottom of their heels. Yeah, they're basically grating cheese onto the bottom of the thing. Holy crap. Hideous. Holy crap. First glass passengers once took their soggy socks off and dried them by putting them over the air vents above the seat. Oh, boy. People that were in coach complained about the smell. Shut your mouth. Shut up, peasants. Shut your mouth. You can eat cake. Lost panties. Excuse me? Oh, wow. This flight attendant... Is there a... Is there a Lauren O'Brien here? Does it say Tuesday on it? It says, I was helping clean the plane at one of our outstations so that we could turn the plane on time. Found a pair of... Uh-oh, don't say it. Come up with something else. Say it, say it, say it. I want to know. Bloody panties. In the seat pocket where they put the magazines. That's why they wear the gloves.
Oh, because it's true. It's a true story. It's right here. This flight attendant found a pair of bloody panties in the seat pocket. It's someone with psychological issues. That's someone's daughter. Sounds like they weren't prepared. Or girlfriend. How do you, how do you? Well, and here's the other deal. It must be an empty flight because you're obviously not going to do that in front of a human being. You wouldn't do that. You'd be embarrassed to do that if you had your dog sitting next to you. You'd be embarrassed to do that in front of the dog because you'd think the dog would go, you're a sick monster. Yes. The dog would look at you and go, you're disgusting. I don't even want to hypothesize. Shove it down in the trash of the bathroom. Well, of course. Wrap it in a bunch of stuff. Well, this is one of those deals. This is one of those deals that makes me think, how strange.
The human population is because weird stuff. Woods, not to call you out or anything. Right. But at some point, someone at a high school here in San Diego County discovered that the bathrooms were locked over the weekend where you were playing in your. adult, semi-professional baseball league, and all the bathrooms were locked up, and you had no choice but to go behind the dumpster. Yeah, do business. Yeah. It had to be done. But in Woods' defense, he put a piece of newspaper on top of it. And several paper towels. And paper towels on top of it. Thank you. Had to be done. What are you going to do? Hold it? No, there was no holding. This was, ask your pants. What a dumpster. It was a dumpster, literally. It was behind it. No, I was behind the dumpster. Because I had... What do you think? He's got class. He's got class. Yeah, I'm classy, dude. I'm not a monster. You've got to put it in the container. Yeah, I wasn't going to mess with it. It was not. Hey, listen. It's not one of my finer moments. It's not. It's not like he's proud of it. I'm kind of proud of it. A little bit proud of it.
He's a little proud of it. It had to be done. Listen, it was that or I was out of the game. I had to go home. I wasn't going to have to go home. My wife, Rebecca, had to do the opposite of that. The numero uno. And had one of the kids with her. And she says it still qualifies as one of the most embarrassing moments of her life. She exhausted all effort. Well, she went to a park. And she got out of the car and took the twin. I can't remember which kid she had with her. But went in the bathroom. And the bathroom, she went in there. And first of all, one of the lights was out on the fluorescent lights. So it looked like, you know. Heroin shooting gallery. Yeah. It looked like they were filming Saw 5 in there. And she goes into the bathroom. And she said that there was doo-doo. And you've seen this at public restrooms. Where it's on the wall. It's a women's bathroom. That's what she said. She goes, it's a women's bathroom. They're the worst. So she goes into the other one, and the water on the toilet was up to the lid. And so it was just water. That's all it was. It doesn't matter. I know, but still, there was nothing bad. It was just water. It's toilet water. And so she was like, I'm out of here. So she leaves, but when she got there, she said when she parked the car, she had to pee her pants. Bursting. Yeah.
And so she goes, I can't. So she left there and she's on a mad search for another one. And somebody says, yeah, there's one right over there. So she's like hustling to get over there. And she says she knows in her mind it's going to be one of those situations where it's going to be last minute, like just barely makes it. She knows that. And she gets there and they've got a chain around the thing with a craftsman lock and it's locked and she can't get in there. So she had to go. behind the place where the air vents are and she yeah where they were like the air conditioner air vents in the deal and she's behind one of those and it was luke luke is flipping out screaming and screaming screaming and she's humiliated because she got to go to the bathroom like this and in the middle of it luke runs off and so she's like is this a movie oh my god like this is like a nightmare
And so she's got to go chasing after Luke in the middle of it. Oh, my God. But listen, you know, things happen. Parenthood. Yeah, things happen. Well, but you got to cover your tracks. You got to cover your tracks. You do have to cover your tracks. Or paper towels. Or paper towels. You had them in your car? Yes. Oh, gosh. Good thing. Still have them in my car. It's a good idea, Woodsy. Okay, this email says, Mike, you have this dilemma I wanted to talk to you about. I've been asked to be a groomsman for a guy. that came out of the woodworks. We were never really too close, and we went AWOL, and he went AWOL, for the last eight years. Then made contact a couple of times in the last year, but didn't spend any kind of time together. Now he calls and tells me he's getting married in December. Shotgun wedding, bride's pregnant. And he asked me to be the groomsman. I said yes on the spot, but after thinking about it, I don't want to be involved in photos and like M1 John Doe. I don't want to say who he is. So, in other words, dude gets a call from a friend that he's kind of friends with, but not super close. And the guy says, will you be in my wedding? And he says, yeah. And then he's like, I don't really know this guy. I don't know him very well. I mean, they haven't really talked in a long time.
When you ask somebody to be in a wedding, by the way, you're basically saying to them, hey, are you cool spending anywhere from $1,000 to $2,000? Yeah. You know, if it's out of town. Right. If it's out of town, is it okay if I ask you for the privilege of spending $1,000 to $2,000? Yes. Now, this guy. is getting married, the shotgun wedding, the whole thing. He's been asked this guy. My deal is, bro, sorry, you already said yes. You got to do it. But in the future, you don't. Right. What do you think, Woods? Yeah, for sure, man. He already told me he would. Can't be a jerk. Yeah. Guy's planning on you being there. LLB. Yeah. It's really tough to go back and be like, you know, I thought about it. I kind of don't agree with your lifestyle. And also, I just don't really feel like I know you anymore. Right. So easy. Yeah. All you do is look at your calendar and you go, Wow, you know what? Looking at my calendar, it's not really going to work. Why? It's just that easy. Why is it not going to work? I didn't realize I had so much stuff going on during that time period. I'm crazy. But aren't you lying? No, because I could have a lot of stuff on my calendar. I'm not saying. I will eventually because I'm going to fill it up after I get off the phone with you. Yeah. I could write all kinds of things on my calendar. Man, my calendar's full. Have you guys ever heard of this? Have you guys ever heard of the person, the friend that questions?
Who you have in your party? Like who your groomsmen are? Not yet. Not for me, no. Oh, wow. LLB. LLB. LLB's saying that because LLB is not married. I haven't had a bridal party to worry about yet. I'm sure it's a big headache. You've been in a party. Oh, I've been in. Lots of ways. Oh, lots of them. Lots of them. Always. Always. LLB will be married. Yeah. Someday. Someday. She has a boyfriend. It's not jinxed. It's like calling the Eagles the dream team, you know? Oh, wow. She has a boyfriend. Count chickens. They've been dating for a couple of years, and eventually they will. Four years, yeah. Feels like decades sometimes. It's like all of high school. Yeah. All of my college. Imagine your first day of high school and your last. You change a lot from 14 to 18. It's a long time. It's a long time. My guess is that it will not be long. Not in my 20s. My guess, too. Maybe over Christmas or something. I don't know. You're not supposed to. Oh, you can't do that? Yeah, you don't project. You don't project because then if it doesn't, then you go, oh. So I should give everybody money back for the pool we started. Yes. The pool.
There is none. I know there's not one. That is a dirty lie. Every time you guys do that, it's like breaking a mirror. It's like you're adding on seven years. If any of the M1s want in, it's $5 and you get a square. That's not true. It's me and Adam. We're doing it. It's a whole week. A couple of guys race there. A couple of guys reach for their wallet. Cool. Well, what I'm saying is, what I'm saying is, is that, so. Maybe you're a guy and you ask this guy to be one of your groomsmen. And you've got a good friend that's also one of your groomsmen. He's like, dude, you're going to ask that guy before you ask our friend blah, blah, blah? And he's now sort of mitigating who he believes should be a bigger role in the wedding. People love to get involved with people's weddings, man. People love to get involved with people's business. That is true. I think if you're going to question that kind of stuff, at least do it behind their back. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Ask your wife. Yeah. What are they doing? Peter don't even know each other. I introduced them. Shouldn't Craig be in the wedding before Bob? Craig should never be in the wedding. All right. Shouldn't Steve be in the wedding before Josh? Yeah. That kind of bit. Or women. Women never get catty.
Women ever caddy? How long have they known each other? No. No, that's an example of what. God, they barely even know each other. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. She probably just wants a good gift. So they have, what, extra large bridesmaids dresses? No one wouldn't say that. Wouldn't. Is she going to cover up her sleeve of tattoos? She's going to be pregnant during the wedding. Oh, my God. Did you even think about that she's going to be freaking pregnant during your pictures? Is she going to do something about the roots? Yeah. I mean, hello. Because she doesn't. She's hideous. Are we all wearing the same dress? Because I don't think that what would look good on me would look good on her. Put her in brown. She looks like a fudgesicle. Okay? There's no way. I mean, my God. Seriously. Like, it's funny, but it's not even funny. Hey, I could have said turd, okay? Yeah, I was thinking turd. Oh, wow. My God. Well? She's a fat pig, okay? Out there. I said it. I said it. We don't talk like that. Don't! You. We don't. Don't. Is the lights different in here? They're not, are they? Are the lights different? Did you hear them? That was Jay.
What was that? He has the most unusual sneeze I've ever heard. You guys can hear that? Through a sound wall? Yeah. Really loud out here. They heard it in the KSON studio. Yes, they did. My bad. Boot Scootin' Boogie just skipped a beat. Let's see. 570-1949 is the number. Don't forget, L.O.B. and I are going to be on CW6 at 850. All right. I look forward to that. I'd support you if they wanted to do a segment on sports. Yeah. Like if they were doing a segment on athletes. Semi-professional baseball. Totally. Something like that. Like a weekly. Yeah. I'd be like, yeah, it's not my area of expertise. Not that relationships are necessary. Yeah, exactly. My area of expertise. But I've been through a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Let's have some noise in our live studio audience. Don't go anywhere. We're going to be talking to Heather from the Derby Dolls. They're playing tomorrow night. And we'll tell you about it. I don't want to go so bad. What's up there, standard poodle? It's Hillary with some chills for you to go check out. Tomorrow it's going to be big, the San Diego Brewers Guild Festival, as we celebrate FM 94.9's ninth anniversary. So there's two stages with music from Family Wagon, Dead Feather Moon, The Bloody Holly, Stone Foxes, Telekinesis, and Matthew Sweet, along with 32 local craft brewers pouring their finest. Starts bright and early tomorrow. We will see you at Guildfest.
On Tuesday, City and Color play House of Blues. Wednesday night, see Ra-Ra Riot at the Belly Up. And Thursday night, see Black Joe Louis and the Honey Bears with the Sheepdogs at the Belly Up. Or Cesio kick off their four-day weekend with Peter Wolfcrier at Sunset Temple. They'll have Dirty Gold their Friday night, Lord Huron their Saturday night, and real estate there on Sunday the 13th. And still to come, shows from Company of Thieves, Morrissey, the Blackheart Procession, Peter Murphy, a rescheduled Boxer Rebellion show, Pinback, Wilco, and of course the FM 94.9 Holiday Hoot Nanny with My Morning Jacket, Two Door Cinema Club, Matt and Kim, Delta Spirit, and the Blackout Party. So there you have it. Get out there and see some shows. For more concert info, check out the FM 94.9 concert calendar online at fm949sd.com. Meet Chris. Um, hello, random voice. Another customer exhausted from a lifetime of unfair treatment from his cell phone company. It's true. I'm even considering giving up cell phones altogether and switching to carrier pigeons. Not so fast, Chris, because now there's an unbelievably fair alternative.
Cox Wireless. How fair are we talking? Unbelievably fair. Go ahead and name anything about your cell phone plan that you think is unfair and I'll tell you how Cox Wireless would handle it. Okay. It's unfair when I have to pay for all the minutes I don't use. Cox Wireless has money back minutes. Money back every month for the minutes you don't use. Up to $20. How's that sound, Christopher? That sounds good. These pigeons are really messy. Your wireless is unfair. Go to Cox.com or visit any Cox Solution store today to find out just how fair wireless can be. Cox Wireless, now available. Cox Wireless is available to residential Cox customers. Coverage not available in all areas. Other restrictions may apply. Hey gang, it's your old pal Woodsy. Hi, it's your old pal L.O.B. Hey, we want to talk to you about Dave and Buster's. Listen, I have a golf tournament on Monday. He's a big time. Playing in a golf tournament with the guys from Dave and Buster's. And I can't go to the Dave and Buster's appearance. So I figured, hey, it's the Eagles. It's the Dream Team.
They're going to be playing Mike Vick, my favorite guy, your favorite guy, for different reasons. I didn't go that far. It's the Eagles against the Bears, and you're going to be there from 5 to 7 on Monday. We've got all kinds of prizes we're giving away, and I'll be there. Guys, I thought you were going to say something else. I love to do that to L.O.B. Dave & Buster's is awesome. There's so much to do. There's so many fun games, and they take really good care of their people there, man. And it's just a fun place to go. If you've got kids, bring them. Foxy L.O.B.'s going to be there. Hannah Stephway way better than me. And I'm going to get pretty rowdy. Oh, yeah. There should be a once-in-a-lifetime chance to see me root for the Eagles. Buy her some shots. It's going to be fun. So get to Dave & Buster's on Monday. It's in Mission Valley. It's 2931 Camino Del Rio North. It's Dave & Buster's Eat, Drink, Play Football.
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Take a break with a 16-ounce Van Hoot coffee plus any variety of Grandma's cookies for just $1.99 through January 1st. Products sold separately at regular price. Chevron Extra Mile. Extra easy, extra value at select Chevron locations. Looking for a quick, delicious lunch? Try Olive Garden's new panini sandwiches. For just $6.95, enjoy a half-pressed panini and pair it with your choice of one of four unlimited homemade soups or fresh salad, both with all the warm breadsticks you want. Choose from three great panini varieties, like grilled chicken caprese or grilled steak and portobello. It's our $6.95 half panini lunch, here for a limited time, weekdays until 4 p.m., only at Olive Garden. This report is brought to you by Constant Contact. Getting ready for small business Saturday? Make sure to get your free promotional tools from Constant Contact. Visit constantcontact.com slash Saturday. Well, it looks like in Escondido, the 15 southbound before the 78, we've got an accident on the right shoulder. The 94 westbound between the 15 and the 5, you've got a lot of delay in this area. Speeds are about 20 miles an hour. The 56 westbound between Carmel Valley Road and Carmel Valley Road, you've also got some slowing. This report brought to you by your San Diego County Toyota dealers. Toyota owners, when it's time to service your Toyota, your best choice is your San Diego County Toyota dealer.
Great prices, service while you wait, available Wi-Fi, shuttle service, and more. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. Let's get to the point. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the program. I'm your diminutive friend. Woods. I am real talented, but I'm not stupid. Lauren. I accidentally had a piece of beef yesterday. Yes! And Jay. I like my coffee black. On FM 94.9. Woods looks terrified. Oh, my gosh. Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. Let's make some noise. Oh, my God. I don't know, Woods. I don't know. But she gets a longer running start out in the hole. Well, San Diego Derby dolls are here. And they are awesome. They got their skates on right now. And what they're going to attempt to do is jump Woods and Jay. Well, are they sure they're not biting off more than chew with Woods?
Oh, gosh. They have been getting each other physically. And emotionally today. They're assaulting each other. Yes. Woods was first. Woods was first. He checked Jay in the nards. Sounded like this. Oh, yeah. My hand stung. Yeah, it stung Wood's hand. He got him so bad. You're not going to learn that once you get him hard, he comes back. He comes back so strong. Both my eyes watered. He hit me so hard. Is that how bad? He wasn't even smiling. He was like, so hard. It made my stomach hurt. It was the hardest time he's ever hit me. He's not done with you, I have a feeling. Oh, he got me. I got you, but not near. I have a feeling that's not enough. Sorry. Sorry. Well, he took it a step further with Woods. He actually grabbed a hold. And Squo's. Yeah, and Squo's. Squo's as hard as he could. Making orange juice. Okay. I think Squo's pretty much got the message across. Squo's. Making juice. Just ringing the t-shirt out. Yeah. Okay. So let's talk to the... I love the idea of the San Diego Derby Dolls. And I'll tell you why. Because I used to watch it as a kid. I used to watch...
And what is it actually called, what you guys do? Right up to the mic. Right up to the mic. Well, we play a roller derby. This Saturday we're playing Bank Track Roller Derby. And you've got to get right up to that mic. So we're playing a little Bank Track Roller Derby this weekend on Saturday night, tomorrow night. Yep. And we're trying to bring the sport back to like an extreme pro sport. That's right. So we've been working hard. That's Isabel Ringer. Isabel Ringer. You also brought Obi Noxious with you. Hello. And Botoxic. I love the names. And it's fun to watch, mainly because, okay, here's the deal. There was this football league here in town that did, you know, of women, and they would play football. LFL. Yeah, and they would do it in lingerie and stuff. And I thought it was pretty cool, but the reason I really like this, these chicks are, like, getting it. Oh, yeah. Like, I mean, they are getting it. Look at her guns. Two tickets. If I were playing for the Swarm, which is who you're playing this weekend. You're the Swarm. We're playing the fight crew. You're playing the L.A. fight crew. And it happens, by the way, at the Del Mar Fairgrounds. I would see Isabel's biceps and I'd be like, I got an ankle injury. I'm done. Can't play. I'm stiff. My knees are all stiff. I'm real stiff tonight. I don't think it's a good night. I'm just glad she's on my team. Yes. Yeah. Now, and Isabel, what's your job?
I'm actually the general manager with the San Diego Derby Dolls. Nice. I also happen to be a skater on the team. But do you guys have positions? Oh, yeah. What a position. I'm mostly a pivot and a blocker. The pivot's sort of like the play caller of the blockers. So usually kind of keeping the speed of the pack, calling the plays that we're going to run. So, yeah, I do a lot of that. I kind of have a big mouth. Yeah. They're girls that like to be physical. They really like to be physical. Woods just winked at me. Yeah. Oh, gosh. I knew where that was going. I used to call plays. Obi Noxious. Yeah. Hi. How long have you been with the Swarm? Well, I started roller derby like two years ago, but I've been with the Swarm for like a year and a half. Do you have brothers? No. I'm an older sister, and we used to duke it out all the time. So that was my thing. How did you get to be so physical? I don't know. I've always played sports, as long as I can remember. And all the sports that I played were never quite physical enough. Gosh darn, man. I was a catcher in softball and soccer. Yeah. And then Bo Toxic. Yes. How about you? What's your story? I have two brothers, so I think I have brotheritis. And were they older? One older, one younger. Okay. And did these brothers...
mix it up with you my older brother definitely mixed it up with you so he got you he toughened you up yeah definitely yeah i think so what's your position i'm also a head blocker a pivot yeah ringer we play an opposite group so same thing the pivot's kind of like the quarterback um you're blocking but you're calling the plays as you're playing who's the chicks that like are just supposed to take other chicks out all of us all of you yeah we're all blockers wow The hard part about being blocker and roller derby is you're playing offense and defense at the same time. So we're trying to stop their jammer from getting through, but we're also trying to make holes for our jammer at the same time. So we have two jobs constantly. You're watching over your shoulder so somebody doesn't take you out, but you're trying to take them out at the same time. I love this stuff. These girls are tougher than NFL wide receivers. Yeah. Those guys are divas. Yeah. These girls are not divas. No. No, they're pretty tough. And what they're going to do. Okay. Well, let me give the information out. And I want to go, I want to go so bad. It's fascinating to me. Full bar, 21 and up. Ooh. You're going to last out of the year until January, so you better make it tomorrow night. Sorry, it's actually all ages. It's all ages, but there is a full bar. Correct. The bar is 21 and up. Yeah. Unless...
You know, unless you're L.O.B. like L.O.B. was. Our juniors are playing tomorrow night as well, so you'll get to see the little ones. We have a junior derby. How old? How old? They're from 8 to 17. Oh, my gosh. They're rad. That's awesome. Wait a minute, wait a minute. You have to come see them play. Brewing the next round of players early. I mean, we're not pro yet, but those guys will play pro roller derby if they want to. Nice. So we're grooming them now. That's killer. That's great. Okay, so doors open at 5. Juvenile Dolinquets. I get it. That starts at 530. I have a name for myself now. Chubb-tastic. Chubb-tastic. That's my roller derby name. Mine's a takeoff of that. I'm Chubb-par. Chubb-par. I like it. I like it. Mine's L-O-B aggressive. Oh, gosh. That's fantastic. You like that? L-O-B aggressive. Mine is J is perfect. Thank you. Mine's I'm hot. J-Z hot. Okay, so tomorrow night, Fairgrounds, Weiland Hall. Are you all going to? I'm worried. I'm scared. Yeah, I'm worried. You should be. Wear a helmet on.
The game's kind of a big deal, too. So in case you didn't know, this is sort of winner moves on. Right up in that microphone. Get on it. Winner moves on to the championship tomorrow. Rather, after tomorrow. So both of us are going in with equal season records. Oh, boy. And it's both of our last games of the season. Winner take all. Winner moves on to champs, and the loser's done for the season. Kick some butt. So it's a big deal game for us, and it's the last one of the year in Del Mar. You need some home court advantage. Yeah. It's going to be pretty intense. The supporters out there. It's great. Woods is wearing OB Noxious' helmet. Now, do you get to wear the helmet, or has he got to lay down without the helmet? I don't know what good it's going to do. She'll probably wear it. She'll probably wear it. I'm not going to lie to you. I'm worried. I'm scared. I saw her practicing jumps, and she ain't jumping very far because we're on carpet. Yeah, and that's not conducive to this. Oh, God dang it. It's not, is it? Don't look so worried. You could use a good straightaway. Maybe go to the hallway. We hit a lot more than we jump over people. Just saying. Isabel looked a little concerned in her practice run. How are you doing? Good. I'm going to take the microphone out here to Woods. I'm worried. I'm worried. I'm worried. Here she comes for a test run. She's going to clear it easy. Here we go.
All right. She is, how many feet away would you, she's probably, she's probably 40 yards away down the hallway. Oh gosh. Woods is rolling on top of Jay. They're huddling together and she just, I think she's going to come rolling around the hallway. Here she comes. Here she comes. Oh gosh. Oh gosh. Oh my gosh. That scared me so bad. Oh, that scared me so bad. Oh my gosh. They made it. She made it. She made it, and I'm telling you, I feel like she made it by a millimeter. Like by a millimeter. Wow. Oh, my gosh. That was great. You just got cleared, my friend. That was fantastic. Okay, I got to go back in there. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. That would have hurt so bad. If she tripped and kicked me in the face with that skate, I'd be done. You would have been fine. We get that all the time. I feel like Johnny Knoxville. I mean, that was sort of a special circumstance. We usually skate on Masonite. Right. Skate quite fast. Hey, how long do games last? The game itself is 60 minutes of play. Okay. Takes about an hour and a half, two hours. That's pretty easy. It's perfect. In and out. Yeah. And it starts, you girls start at what time?
The adult game's at seven. The juniors game's at six. Got it. So you guys start at seven. That's cool. And what's that? Who goes? It's all types of people. Yeah? Yeah. All walks of life. All right, I got a question. Are your families, you know, because we were talking about this the other day, like going to your kids, baseball games, doing that kind of stuff. Are you guys from San Diego? I am. You're from San Diego. 619. There you go. Does your family? come to this? Every game? Generally every game. Every game. And I have a little girl and a niece that both play. My daughter and my niece both play. Really? Yeah. Wow. It's great in San Diego because it's all age crowd here. Some places we go are 21 and up and this is all ages so we get all different kinds of walks of life and we get a lot of little kids now with the juniors so it's great we get off the track and we have all these little girls and boys. That's rad. Autographs. That's pretty cool. But, I mean, the other end of that, you can also go with, you know, you're 21 and you go with your bar buddies and just go have some drinks and shoot and holler and have a good time, too. It's really all sorts of people. You'll turn around and see, like, some biker couple behind you sitting next to someone's grandma. I mean, it's really all types there. Like, you would at any sports game. Sure. OB Noxious, are you from here? No, I'm from Northern Virginia. 703. That's right. So your family's not, you can't get any family. Well, you would think that I wouldn't get any family, but.
But what? My family are my biggest fans. Really? They fly out pretty much. Wow. Holy cow. Do they really? We do a lot of travel games. We've been to North Carolina, Pittsburgh, Denver, Chicago, Phoenix. And my parents have been to pretty much all of them. What's a tough team outside of you guys from a city? There's a lot. I say LA is the hardest. We're playing tomorrow because we're sister leagues. But then again, it's family and they know how to push your buttons. So we kind of have a rivalry. We love them. most of them off the track. But on the track it gets pretty vicious whenever we play LA. Really? Yeah. So you know the San Diego, LA. Oh yeah, the thing. So our crowds get really into it. Do you ever get like genuinely pissed because you feel that somebody did something dirty? Why are you doing me? Why did they all look at OB Noxious? Like because you feel that you were genuinely like... dissed or cheap-shotted. I don't want to say anything mean about anybody. Give them some bulletin board material. But you will get mad. Sometimes you can do things like hold someone back with your hand. And that's against the rules. But the refs don't see it.
You get all aggro and mad and nobody knows why. You look like an idiot. Right. But that's part of the game, too. You're like, well, Isabel's a real hothead, so why don't we push her buttons early, piss her off real bad, see if she can hold it together for the rest of the game. Part of the game is the mental game and being like, this is a super aggressive sport. People are going to do nasty stuff out there. Out of the three of you, out of the three of you, who's the biggest hothead? They looked at her immediately. She seems like the most tame. Unassuming. Yes. I get that a lot. Little bunnies jump high. Yeah, little bunnies jump high. Yeah. I see Isabel's married. Are you married? I am, yeah. Who wears the pants at your house? I wonder. Be honest. Pull the microphone up. You know, I'm lucky to have a really, really supportive husband who totally believes in anything I believe in. So he supports me a lot through roller derby, and I try to be supportive of a lot of other people. You can probably kick the crap out of that dude. Oh, boy. He's pretty tough. Is he? I bet he's pretty yoked. I bet he's yoked. Of course he is. Seriously.
I'd be scared of that. Oh, yeah. Yeah, a little titillated. Yes. Hey, we're going on TV here in a minute. Oh, cool. Thank you, girls. Thank you for coming in. Thank you for jumping woods. Thank you so much. See everybody tomorrow night. We love you. We love you. I love the Derby Dolls. They're a lot of fun. All right, I got to turn this up. We're going to be on channel, the CW6 here in just a minute. Oreo is a three-year-old York. And that's what you're hearing there. Let's see. Our number here is five. Thank you, girls. Thank you, ladies. We appreciate it. I'm surprised that the girls, you know, they don't look like all beat up and stuff, like all bruised. I would expect them to have scratches and have bloody noses and stuff, like busted up faces, but they don't. They're, you know. Animal and Bird Hospital at 655 Bennett Road in Oceanside. So we do this every Friday. Every Friday we are on the CW6 and we answer questions about... Oh boy, my toe, my toe. Oh gosh, what? Oh no, no, no. What, are you alright? I'm good. Oh gosh, LLB. Oh, you scared me so bad. Did it really? Yeah, but it's okay. Alright, I'm taking my jacket off. We're going to answer... Oh gosh, LLB. Sorry, I'm sorry.
I keep, like, rolling over her foot. I know. We can get this cute little guy into a home. We're going to answer questions about relationships. That's what we do. I don't know how. Friday from Mikey and LLB from The Mikey Show. Hi. Good morning. Happy Friday. Good morning and happy Friday to you. Okay, this first question comes from Regina. She says, caught my husband in a lie. He didn't realize the slip, but I did. Should I bring it up? But there's a P.S. She said the lie is just about going out to lunch. Said he didn't, but I found a Mickey D's receipt. This just makes me wonder what else he's been thinking about. Yes. Well, been there, done that. Literally. Yes, yes. And here's the deal. Obviously, dude is... He is embarrassed that he went to Mickey D's, and that's why he hasn't said it. But you guys also know the way I roll. You don't have to lie about it. I mean, you can say it if she asks you. And in terms of asking him about it, of course you can ask him about it. Know, though, that you're going to be embarrassing him. That's the bit. That's what's going to happen. Ella B? I agree mostly, and also...
Women like to know every single detail, like how many ketchup packets did you use? Did you add salt to your fries? Stuff like that. And I don't think guys pay attention to those details. So I think it's just a little, maybe a little guilty pleasure he's got going on. So, well, what do you think of her concern about what... else might he be lying about is that a valid concern well uh listen if he had said that he had gone out to lunch uh that he hadn't gone out to lunch and it turns out that he went to the marriott and was having lunch at the marriott maybe then the guy was having uh fast food and he was embarrassed that he's going out to get fast food i agree i agree definitely yeah okay here's our other Question. This is from Chanel, though. And this is a little bit different. She wants her boyfriend to lie every now and then. And just an innocent lie. You know when women ask, does my butt look too big in these jeans? She would maybe like her husband to say, oh, no, honey, you look great. But apparently he's really honest. Way too honest, she says. Every once in a while.
How about a little white lie just as a compliment or something? What do you think? Yeah, we've talked about this on The Mikey Show plenty of times. And the deal with that is, in my opinion, it's not what you say, it's how you say it. So if you say, yes, dear, it looks enormous. You're probably, it's not going to work very well. No, if your couch is comfortable. Exactly, exactly. The couch better be very comfortable if that's the way to answer. But the bottom line is, I think you can answer. Any question, honestly, but it's all in the way that you say it and the way that you do it. And if a lady asks something, shouldn't you kind of be prepared to hear an answer? Okay, wait a second. How do you answer that question then, Mikey? If somebody says, does my butt look too big in these jeans and you're going to be honest about it, how would you say it? Listen, I have a policy with my wife. Fellas, follow this policy. The policy with your wife is that you're always got, you have to see two items. That gives you the out. That way, when you guys know that ahead of time, she comes out, she goes, does my butt look too big in this? You go, well, let me see the other one. And then she puts the other one on and you're like, hmm, I like that second one. I think that second one's pretty good. Okay, that's practical advice. That's news you can use right there. Okay, Lauren? I weirdly agree again with what Mike said. It doesn't happen that often. But I think...
If she's soliciting information, if she's asking you, she kind of has to be prepared. But if he's just offering it unsolicited, then he's kind of a jerk if he's just saying stuff. And there's a difference between honest and brutally honest. But I have a feeling she knows who she's with. And if she can't take the heat, get out of the boyfriend kitchen. That's right. Yeah. You know what, though? I kind of think when it comes to the way us women look. Lying is totally okay. Oh, my goodness. See, I don't know, though. We always look good. Our hair is perfect, and our butt is tiny. It's one thing if there's something. Okay, so if I'm out and I can't do anything about it, you probably don't want to tell me that my hair looks a little flat. But if I'm getting ready, I actually appreciate the honesty. And the only person I really want to impress is my boyfriend, so I would appreciate. Hey, by the way, Mark, you know this is true. It's not just women. We do it too. We put on something and we go, hey, babe, do I look fat in this? You do. Well, for me, everything I put on, she goes, well, yeah. I mean, you're going to have to basically. You know, the last thing I want to hear is, is that what you're wearing? Never say, is that what you're wearing? That's what I do. Yes. L-O-B is that what you're wearing? Yeah. All right, guys, we got to go. Have a great weekend. Thanks a lot, guys. See you on Friday.
There you go. Can you just tell my name's Lauren? Oh, wow. Jay has that. Jay has that drop. And he plays it forever. Oh, God. She hates it. What did he say? There you go. What were you saying, Woods? Oh, wow. What is that? Where did you get that? I like it. I like it. You like it? It looks cool. Does it? I can't. I just asked Jake. Can I pull off the trucker? Of course. That's a very Ashton Kutcher of you. Do I? I want one time to see you in a flat bill. One time. Never. You hate it. Yeah. And just one time I want to see you in it. Baseball player. And now the baseball players, they're doing flat bill. It's rad. Flat bill. Oh, I love it. Yes, L-O-B. Oh, it's awesome. It's hideous. Dude, that and a pair of real dark black sunglasses. I am not Mexican, dude. You don't have to be. As much as you think I am, I'm not. Your friend Winder, our friend Winder with the blonde hair, the blue eyes, he does it and he pulls it off. It looks great. It looks awesome. He is a good friend and a lover.
I didn't just say that. That's a recording of me that's been taken out of context. I didn't just say that. You did say it about Woods, though. No, I never said that about Woods. You said a lover of... Touch my body. Oh, I didn't. No, that's not me now. That's a recording of me at another time. I boned Ashton Kutcher. Mike. Mikey. I didn't. You do look like Ashton Kutcher with a hat on, so look out, Woods. Wow. I was seduced by Ashton. That's what they always say. Maybe we're going to play a game of drops. Drop off. Put your tiny hand in mine. Oh, boy. We have some new ones for our friend Jacef R. Isbell. And he has made sure to load them on a page that's just far away from my... It's page Roman numeral 69. That's what it is. Yeah. I'm that stupid. And then it's category G. G, right. Oysters. What's that? Oh. Oysters. What about Mr. Furley? 70s. Tim Conway, Don Knox flick. Who did I go see in concert with my wife? It's not like it's Taylor Swift. What if you were to bring something up that had nothing to do with what we were talking about? Whatever you think you know about this man is irreverent. Do you believe that all I do is use biblical references on the air? Doesn't it say that I shall not kill? Yep.
He also says that whenever I bend over, he sees my butt crack. That's a lot of Mikey's coin. Yep. Coin slot. Oh, my. Oh, my. Corn slot. I love Mikey's corn slot. That's true. That's right. And then recently he was trying to tell us about a peanutty something was. Only he said. Peanutty. That was during buzzword. Video game for the Nintendo. Okay, that one, that one's never going to get set. Casey Anthony. Who? How did he feel about Casey Anthony? Where do you think she should be put in the book? Hopefully she gets put in the general populace, whatever it's called. General populace. There, I got it now. Probably the best ever. There, I got it now. It's the best ever. Our boy Jared is at createyourdesignonline.com, and he can get you anything you need when it comes to graphic design. You want business cards? Do you want a website? Anything you need, he's the guy. Do you want boat decals? That's right. Because he just made them for me and my dad. That's right. Let's make some noise in our live studio audience in here. Here we go. 94.9.
One of the most anticipated annual concerts is back. The FM 94.9 Holiday Hootenanny presented by Coors Light. Saturday night, December 3rd at Jenny Craig Pavilion on the University of San Diego campus. Starring the band heralded by Rolling Stone, Spin, Pitchfork, and the New York Times as the best live band in America. My Morning Jacket. Also featuring Two Door Cinema Club. Matt and Kim. Delta Spirit. And the Blackout Party tickets are on sale now. Get yours at tickets.com, the Jenny Craig Pavilion box office on the USD campus, or FM949SD.com. The FM 94.9 Holiday Hootenanny 2011 is presented by Coors Light and supported by Spy Optic. Join us on Saturday night, December 3rd for an epic evening of music with FM 94.9.
For more than a century, Azusa Pacific University has provided excellence in Christian higher education. Earn your degree in less than two years by attending class one night a week in a format designed for working professionals like you. Go to apu.edu, keyword San Diego. Are you okay? That Bengal tiger doesn't seem to want to let go of your head. Ouch. Wolfgang, it's these energy drinks. They wear off so quickly and my reflexes get slow. I told you to cool it with those things. Who knows what's in them? You should try my energy drink. It's called alternative energy and it's by function drinks. I'm in incredible pain. But I'm listening. It's all natural formula gives me steady sustained energy that tastes great with no, uh... Poorly timed crash. I'm losing so much oxygen, but please continue. And with a formula of natural stimulants, it kicks in at different stages. When one is wearing off, another is just starting. Tell my wife and kids that I love them. Fear not. Your life will serve as a reminder to the world. Choosing the wrong energy drinks can be deadly.
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Mammoth Mountain Concert Series presents the Black Lips and Ra-Ra Riot at Canyon Lodge November 12th. Tickets are only $20 in advance and $25 at the door. Come out for the wildly energetic psychedelic rock sound from the Black Lips. D-Rock from Ra-Ra Riot. This concert is part of the Big Winter Kickoff weekend. Packed full of events and parties at Mammoth Mountain. For more information and to purchase your tickets, call 800-Mammoth. Or visit mammothmountain.com. See you at Big Winter Kickoff. Good things come in threes. Like three days of huge savings. Don't miss the three-day sale this Friday, Saturday, and Sunday at Vaughn's. When you spend $75 or more in a single transaction with Vaughn's Club, you'll get a $10 reward coupon for your next purchase. Stock up and save big this weekend. And keep the savings adding up. Check out these amazing Vaughn's Club deals, good only through Sunday. Rancher's Reserve Boneless Beef New York Steak is only $5.99 a pound in the Extreme Value Pack. Driscoll's Red Raspberries are two for $3, 5.6-ounce size.
And it's your last week to stock up and save on wines for all your holiday needs before the sale ends. Use Vons Club and get 30% off all wine in the store. Plus, save an extra 10% when you've bought six. Load up for the weekend. Stock up for the celebrations ahead. Don't miss the three-day sale this weekend only. Vons. Ingredients for life. Coupon expires November 13th. See store for details and list of excluded items. Vons Club required. You guys ready for some Sunday football? Go to U31, North Park's number one bar and grill to hang out with me, Woodsy. Prizes awarded to those who can pick. FM 94.9 will host select 1 p.m. football games throughout the season. Check FM 94.9SD.com for details. This report brought to you by Kohl's Department Store. Don't miss Kohl's Power Shopping Sale today, Saturday, and Sunday. Get a head start on the holidays with Kohl's most powerful prices throughout the store. The more you know, the more you Kohl's. Coles expect great things. Well, it looks like Oceanside is tied up here on the 5 southbound after Bassalone rode an accident over on the right shoulder. A car rolled down the embankment. It's just south of the San Onofre plant. Escondido, the 15 southbound before the 78, an accident on the right shoulder. And you have some use, not use, you, you. Yeah, you over there. On the 78 eastbound between Escondido Avenue and Twin Oaks Valley Road, you have a little slow traffic. All right.
This report brought to you by Navy Federal Credit Union. Every dollar goes further with Navy Federal's cash rewards. Credit card. Get cash back with every purchase. To get started, visit NavyFederal.org. I'm Stacey Cohen, FM 94.9. And now back to The Mikey Show with Mikey. I like a skinny fry. I don't like thick. I don't like thick. Lauren. I'm a lyricist. Woods. Oh, I want filth. I want straight filth. As filthy as it can get. And Jay. I've got bees in my attic right now. On FM 94.9. Winder. Winder just texted Woods and says he doesn't. First noise. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He says he doesn't wear a flatbed. I thought he did wear a flatbed and looked badass. He says he doesn't, and I can't remember him doing it, but. I'm just not a Flatbill guy. I just can't do it. I'm 36. I'm not trying to be, you know, Joe Flatbill. Joe Flatbill. See, I've figured out why men look like dorks when they're having their midlife crisis. I figured it out. You got it? Yeah, the reason is because they don't realize that they're that age. In their head, they're still, like, normal age. Yeah, they still feel 29 or whatever. Right, like...
I'm 41, but I see tattoos every day, and I wear a T-shirt. So that qualifies me as young. So I think I can do whatever I want. It also has to do with how your attitude is. I mean, we act like freaking children most of the day. So we're not real buttoned-up guys as far as like, hey, we're going to go out to dinner, need to put a suit and tie on. We're pretty casual, laid-back guys. Yes. But I think that that's going to be... We're going to be the... This is a good topic. What are we going to do if we're between 30 and 40 right now? If we're between 30 and 40 right now, what are we going to do, ladies and guys, that our kids are going to go, you're a dork. This hat. What will we wear? Yes. This hat. Because that hat is cool. Okay, he's wearing the Fidel Castro hat. Oh, and then he takes it off. If he still keeps it up then. Yes. If I had a seven or eight-year-old kid right now, they'd go, Dad, stupid hat. Well, what about Jay, though? Jay dressed like a 15-year-old. No, no, no, no. See, what I think you got to do, though, is that if you're between 30 and 40 right now, just fast forward 10 years. And what do you think is kind of cool right now that you will do then and your kids will be like, you're joking, right? I mean, for me.
I think that I have some t-shirts that I think are pretty cool that my kids will be like, if my friends are coming over in an hour, can you change? And I'll be like, why? This is a Trilolo t-shirt. It'll be classic. Yeah, I'll be like, do you know how freaking funny this was? Yeah, boy with the Trilolo, dad. I have shirts from 15 years ago that my kids' friends see, and they're like, oh, man, where'd you get that shirt? I got it from a radio station I used to work at. Yeah, and it's true. KPRB. What do they say when they see your Coachella bracelet? They go, hey, you still got it on? Cool. What do they say when they see your picture? on your shirt that you're wearing now that says Mr. Perfect under it. They go, we do it. With a picture of himself. With a picture of himself. I didn't make the shirt, and then one made it for me. You wear it a lot. You wear it every Friday when listeners say, hey, I want to make sure I know who they're talking to. Weird. L.O.B., is there anything that you're into that you think that 10, 15 years from now, they'll be like, Mom, with that? Probably my, like, Pashminas. Yes. Those things that I wear. Exactly. Oh, 100%. I like those. Dude.
Of course, because it's now. But these are the things that, right now, that's really cool. Like, the Newsboy hat, I think, is the baddest thing. It's so cool. 10, 15 years from now, dude, you wear that thing and your kids will go, drop me off a mile before school. Or take that off. Or take that off. And you'll be like, have you ever heard of Kings of Leon? And they'll be like, oh, God, dad, dad, dad. It's what we think about the Doobie Brothers now. Yes. You know? I love the Doobie Brothers. Weird. They'll be a new, like, and we'll try to be cool. We'll be like, are you guys like smoking weed? And they'll go, weed? Weed. Because it'll be called something else then. Weed. It'd be like our dad being like, hey, somebody smoking grass around here? The pot, my mom used to call it. Taking the pot. The pot. He's smoking the pot. My mom. My mom. I smell pot. I smell marijuana. Yeah. Really? Do you? Don't you? Marijuana. Marijuana. Brent, my brother. Brent, I smell marijuana. We say that all the time to this day. Are you smoking marijuana cigarettes? Mary Jane. You've never heard that. That's what they called it when I was a kid in school. They were like in your health class or like other names known as Mary Jane. They really said that? Mary Jane. Like who's calling her Mary Jane? Rick James was. That's it. Yeah.
Besides Rick James, though, no one. 570-1949 is the number. You can always tell. I coached Little League, so you could tell the recent divorcee, 42, 44-year-old. Yeah. He is very well-groomed. He has got about $300 jeans on. Yes. Yes, and some fresh, black, polished-up shoes. Yeah. And he looks... So far out of his element. Yes. Because he's out there. Yeah. And he's like, no. He's trying it out. I got to try it out. And he looks like a dork. Well, here's the deal. That's me. He went to Nordstrom and he said, why don't you just tell me, you know, give me some ideas here. Fix me up. Yeah. So he's hanging out at his son's baseball practice with a flat bill affliction hat. Yep. And seven jeans. He still hasn't gotten it all figured out yet, so he's got on like a Tommy Bahama. Yes. Okay? Yeah. So the flat bill, the Tommy Bahama, and a pair of $500 jeans. Yeah. Shirts tucked in. Shirts tucked in. Shirts tucked in. Tucked in shirts here, you can't do. No. I used to always wear my shirt. Like these jeans and shirt, I'd always tuck it in. Never again. With a belt. Yeah. Never again. He came here. Woods came to California, and the first couple of weeks he was here, he was walking around with shirts tucked in. Yeah.
He used to dress up with, like, he had, like, cowboy boots on. I still don't remember. Like, pointy cowboy boots on. Oh, she's like, yeah, those dumb-looking things. Those ones that you're wearing. But you had a belt, and he would have, like, a nice button-down, and Sienna and I would just come in wearing, like... They'd laugh at me. They'd shame me every day. I'd be like, wow. Let me tell you. Fancy. Woods has become completely California. I have to. You have to adapt. You do. You do have to. It's hard to get made fun of every day. By the way, I'm so glad that you said that. Why? Because it was a couple of mornings ago. I remember, like, because every once in a while we will hit the eject button on each other because we'll, you know, we were talking about the other day. We're really tight. And I mean, like, for real tight. Not like my old show, tight. Fake tight. Yeah. And so we're really tight. Radio tight. Yes. Right. But we are super tight. When I was at the other show, and people have asked me, they're like, I thought you guys were really good friends. And I was like, what are you going to do? Go on the radio and be like, hey, they're really good friends. We don't talk much. He's been my best friend since I was 12, but we don't like each other. You don't do that. But the truth is that we all are very tight, but we can push each other's buttons. And so that's when we usually eject. Well, I was thinking about...
how we can get on each other now and i remembered a moment before we started on the radio we were all hanging out together it was like one of our very first meetings all together and woods was like hey you know i think it's gonna be fun when we're just like tearing each other up viciously and i go what do you mean and he goes and he goes well where i used to work we would call each other like you know You ugly, fat piece of... And I was like, yeah, I don't know if we should go there, man. I'm not sure if we should go there. I remember. Yeah. I remember that. And Woods was like, you sure, man? Pretty funny. Pretty funny. They used to call me Charles Hubs. C. Hubs. Chubs. Charles Hubs. They put it on my office door. Yeah, I remember that's exactly what he said. That was the example. And I said, it can get a little touchy. I'm like, really? What are you guys, P words? Now I'm like, shut up. So true. Because, you know, at your house when we were meeting, I didn't realize there'd be, you know, thousands of people listening. Yes. And then what I also didn't realize is, like, I walk into a meet and greet. Some guy I've never met is like, hey, fat ass, how you doing? I'm like, who the hell are you? You know? There was a lot that Woods had to get used to. Oh, God. Still. Still getting used to.
L-O-B-2. L-O-B-2. You guys want to play catchphrase? Let's do this. Let's do this. Let's give away something. What do we got to give away, Jay? We've got a pair of tickets to see the Black Lips and the Ra-Ra Riots at Mammoth Mountain. Also includes lift tickets to Mammoth Mountain on 11-12. Nice. $120 value. Now check this out. We are going to switch teams up again. Me and L-O-B are going to be partners. And Jay and Woods are going to be partners. Is that really a picture of him? On his shirt. Oh, yeah. Mr. Perfect. Oh, wow. Looks a little like Dave Matthews. That is fantastic. That's fantastic. Hey, Mikey, your cookies are here. All right. Oh, boy. Is this your whole bowl? Is this what you brought for lunch? Hey, Mikey, I found your lunch pail. Yeah, here's your lunch pail. Just add milk, Mike. Yeah. It's a trough of cookies. Cookie crisp, but they're real-sized cookies. Do they still make cookie crisps? I don't think so. Boy, those were good. They were good. This is quiet. This is so loud. This mic is so loud. It's not the mic, it's the headphones. M1 Greg from Alpine, do you want Team Mikey L-O-B or Team Woods and Jay? Woods and Jay. There you go. Git. Yeah, Git. And M1 Robin from San Marcos, you've got...
Me and L.O.B., okay? Awesome. Thanks, man. All right, hang on. Okay. All right. It's entertainment. We're mind-melding. All right, now, Jay, or Woods, explain how it works. Okay, so this is catchphrase where we always play the same category, entertainment. And what's going to happen is Jay's going to describe to me something in the entertainment field without using that name or any part of the word. Right. And I have to guess what it is. All right, here we go. Here we go. We're team one. When I go to try out for this film, Your audition. Yes. The movie with Richard Gere and Julia Roberts. Pretty Woman. He's a red-headed talk show host. Conan. Brian. O'Brien. Conan Brian. She was in Lord of the Rings and played an elf, and her father is... Oh, Liv Tyler. Yep. He's like a Walter Cronkite, but he's another guy. Tom Brokaw. Like a rabbit.
is called... Peter? Peter Jennings. Yes. Oh, gosh. Tony is the main guy and it's a family in New Jersey. Oh, Sopranos. Son of a... She's very hot. Mikey's favorite. Redhead. No, blonde. Blonde. Very hot. Very hot. Yeah! Very hot. Scar Jo. Scarlett Johansson. I knew it. I knew it. I knew it. Everybody else knew it. That's right. That's right. Hillbilly. That's right. Team two gets a point. Oh, I love this game. I'm sweating already. That's why we play it every game. Every day we love it so much. I can't sit on a stupid ball. Sorry. Here, let's switch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, now what do I do? I always get confused. You hit start. Hit start. All right, Ella B, you ready? Yeah. Much better. Here we go. It's three words. The last word is an animal that flies. Bird. Yes. And the... First two words are the same, and it's a way of saying so long. Bye-bye, Birdie. Yep. Oh, my goodness. Very well. Very good. What? He's a pig. Babe. Another name for... Bye-bye-bye. That's all, folks. Isolate. Porky. Porky pig. Isolate. But it's just the... Porky. Yes, and... Porky's revenge. Porky's last stand. The girl who sold the flag. Porky Ross. Porky Betty.
Ugly Betty. No, it's just the first four letters. Come on, Jen Clampett. First four letters of her name. Porky Bet. Pork Bet. Pork Betty. Betty Pork. God, I have no idea what this is. I'm just going to let it run out. Porky and Bess? No idea. No idea. Never heard of it. What's Porky and Bess? I have no idea. It's the number one morning show in El Paso. Hey, it's Porky and Bess, everybody. Good morning. Porky and Bess. Oh, don't forget to vote for us on the R factor. Don't forget to vote for us on the R factor. That's a cheat. Are we ready? Okay, Mickey is the main character of this particular group. The Mouseketeers. No, bigger than that. Walt. Walt Disney. Yes, and then it's two words, and the second part is a radio has... Disney radio. No, it's called a station in radio, but in TV it's called a... Channel. Yes. Disney Channel. Yep. Oh my goodness. Come on. LLB does a perfect imitation. She was in Jerry Maguire. Jerry Maguire. Facial imitation. Facial imitation. I know it is, but I can't remember her name. Jerry Maguire. You complete me. Give me something more. Come on. Sound it out. Girl you dated. Really? She's in Jerry Maguire. She's the main character of Jerry freaking Maguire.
Very interesting last name. Really? Long. You're not helping me. I thought the only help you needed was she was in Jerry Nebra. Renee Zellweger. Renee Zellweger. Dang it. You gotta laugh at marijuana. I'm telling you. You guys are working well together. Much like Wipeout. Team two, Mike. Team two. So we should have three points now. You pretty much shut them out. Hey, we gotta come back. Are we still going? Yeah. Okay, here we go. Start. L-O-B. His last name is the opposite of Queen. There's a Queen and a... Stephen King? Nope. Two letters, the same, and it's the second in the alphabet. B.B. King. That's it. I can feel it in the air tonight. Phil Collins. Yes. He goes, no. Grow up. Peter Pan. Oh, wow.
He is the very sly animal. He's a very sly animal. He's in cartoons. You're on the right track. He's in The Roadrunner. Wile E. Coyote. Yeah. This is not the word, but there is south, east, west, and... North. Okay, but the... Yeah, we're on the board. Chris Noth. Yeah, he's big. He's big from Sex and the City. What's up, dude? Are you serious? Wow, you are a woman. Oh, my gosh. That's great. Fair enough. Yesterday, he knew Kristen Davis. Yeah, yeah. Great show, great movie. Wow. There was no way to do that. There was no way to do that. Oh, that old word, Noth. You could have gone, this guy, who was our... Phone screeners, first name is. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then I would have never gotten Noth. How do you get Noth? How do you explain that? It's like a southern way of saying... It's like how Jay says North. Yes. Yeah, it's how Jay would say North. You could say that. I could have. You could have said that. You could say North. You could say North? Well, hindsight. All right, 2020. Here we go. All right, come on. Oh, God. It's a game you play where it's interactive.
Ping pong. No, it's on the video. It's like a video game. It's not Nintendo. It is. PlayStation. It's Nintendo. Wee, wee, wee, wee. Britney's sister. She got knocked up. She has three names. One of them is the same as Woods' wife. Jamie Lynn Spears. Oh, you son of a... Yeah, Lee, who knows this? Oh, he'll never get it. It's a book. A girl had an A on her chest. Oh, the scarlet letter. Look at you! If you like to go different places, what are you doing? Travel. That's the second word. The first... Time travel. No, no, no. It's a name of somebody. And his first name is... Blue's traveling. No, it's a person. It's a name of a book. Oh, boy. Yeah! Go Blue's traveling! Yes! Back in it, back in it. Yes. Give us a point, Jay. Give us a point. Darn it, Gulliver. Give us a point. Two to three. Come on, baby. Let's go. Come on. Shake it off. Dang it. He's a black man. Wesley Snipes. Different one, but he's in all kinds of movies. Denzel Washington. Yes. What? I don't know who this is. Oh, great. Oh, gosh. Oh, no. Oh, gosh. All right. There's three names. Okay.
The first one is, he's an apostle. Paul. John. Yes, that one. And then the other one is like Seymour Hoffman, that first name. John Paul Gosler? No, no, no. John Paul Jones. No, no, no. John Paul... No, no, no, no. Sorry. Okay, the Cigarette Company. Something Morris. Oh, Philip Morris. Yes, but the... Philip Seymour Morris? No, no, no. Take the first name you said. Oh, uh... Oh, gosh. John Morris. It's like Dr... Drew? No, no, no. With the... Bill! Green eggs and ham! And then there's three names. Dr. Seuss. Dr. Seuss. Yes, that's like the last name. Yeah. Back in it. John Philip Sousa. Yeah. Who's that? I've never heard of that. Have you ever heard of that? I think he wrote the, did he write the Star Spangled Banner maybe? Something like that, yeah. John Philip Sousa? Maybe. Nothing. John Philip Sousa. Yeah, I wouldn't have known what to say either. This is it. Winner take all. Winner take all. Winner take all. They had a 3-0 lead. It's because Jay cheats. Yes, you cheaters. I don't cheat. Ready? Yes. For mind melding. Oh, my God. Four words. Four words. First word is the second number. Two. Okay. Second word is, well, hello. Dolly. Hello. Lady. Not a ma'am, buddy. Hello. Not a ma'am. Sir. Yep. Two, sir.
Then, if I give you something, you have it. You're blank with child. No, I just said the word. Oh, you're going to win by default. What the heck? To Sir with Love. What was it? To Sir with Love? I think it's a movie. To Sir with Love. Oh, my gosh. M1 Robin from San Marcos. We did it for you. Nice. Thanks, guys. You are welcome. Hang in line. The game makes me sick. I almost have to throw up every time we play it. Oh, wait. Sorry. Have I ever done that before? One, two, three. Let's make some noise. New movies out this weekend. Boy, what a lovely day outside it is today, huh? All right, we'll tell you the new movies because you're probably going to want to be inside this weekend, and maybe that'll help you. Don't go anywhere. Let's do it! More from The Mikey Show coming up. Be a part of the show. I don't think it's that simple. 570-1949. Or shoot him a text at 949mikey at gmail.com. I'm beginning to like the sound of that. The countdown has begun. Only one day to go.
It's the official kickoff to San Diego Beer Week this Saturday afternoon at Liberty Station. FM 94.9 and Napa Auto Parts presents the San Diego Brewers Guild Festival. This is the ultimate craft beer festival showcasing all 32 members of the guild drink legendary and award-winning beers. Meet the Brewers, Stone, Ballast Point, Green Flash, Coronado, Alpine, Pork, Carl Strauss, Alesman, Mission, Lost Abbey, Rock Bottom, Aztec, Automatic, Iron Fist, and more. And rock out all day. Help us celebrate our night. 9th anniversary with two stages of music. Performing on the FM 94.9 anniversary stage. Matthew Sweet. Telekinesis. Stone Foxes. On the local 94.9 stage. The Bloody Hollies. Dead Feather Moon. Family Wagon. Advanced tickets for the general session are $35. This price includes beer and music. The ticket price will increase the day of, so get them now at FM949SD.com. It's our ninth anniversary and the official kickoff to Beer Week. It's the San Diego Brewers Guild Festival. See you tomorrow. Get your tickets and details at FM949SD.com.
The world's largest tattoo convention. The Body Art Expo returns to downtown San Diego at the concourse. November 18th through the 20th. With over 200 famous artists tattooing and piercing on site. Only the best will be tattooing at Body Art Expo. Portraits, Asian, biomechanical, or whatever you desire. Party with the most beautiful ladies in San Diego at the Miss Body Art Expo pageant. Plus 19 tattoo contests. Babes, bands, and beer. You don't want to miss this event. Tattoo and Body Art Expo. Tattoo and Body Art Expo. One weekend only, November 18th through the 20th. November 18th through the 20th. San Diego Concourse in downtown. Sponsored by Baba. Check out BodyArtExpo.com. BodyArtExpo.com. BodyArtExpo.com. The world's largest tattoo convention. The Body Art Expo. returns to downtown San Diego at the Concourse. Produced by Mega Productions. Channel 4's San Diego. Your home for Aztecs football. Catch super sophomore Ronnie Hillman and record-setting quarterback Ryan Lindley as they set their sights on the Mountain West Championship. Don't miss a minute of live gridiron action as the Aztecs battle UNLV 7 p.m. Saturday on Channel 4's San Diego.
Everything Aztecs, everything Chargers. The Saquon Casino postgame show, weeknights at 10 on Channel 4 San Diego. Brand new. See why Dagmar Midcap is taking San Diego's weather by storm. Dagmar's weather, tonight on NBC7 San Diego News at 4, 5, 6, and 11. My favorite instrument is the triangle. My favorite flavor is caramel. My favorite animal is the seahorse. My favorite word is undulating. My favorite parent is my mom. Sorry, Dad. My favorite McCafe drink? I can't pick just one. Come take a fresh look at McCafe's luscious beverages made just for you with real whipped cream, rich chocolate, and drizzled indulgently with caramel. Whether it's the new caramel hot chocolate or an iced or hot caramel mocha, stop in today to find your new favorite, the simple joy of caramel at participating McDonald's. Listen to this. What? You know what? You better sit down. But we're in an elevator. Trust me. Sit down. Fine. Ow. Oh, sorry. It's okay. It's back. What's back? It. You mean? Yep.
Awesome. Excuse me, what's back? McRib. Tender pork. Slathered and tangy barbecue sauce. Pickles. Onions. Toasted bun. I love McRib. Can I get your number? The McRib sandwich is back for a limited time. Just $2.79, only at McDonald's. Price and participation may vary. Frank's Red Hot Sauce with cayenne peppers adds the perfect blend of flavor and heat to all your favorite party foods. Like wings, burgers, ribs, dips, and more. Frank's Red Hot Sauce. I've put that on everything. I want to hear, okay. And now back to the Mikey Show. Come on. With Mikey. Mikey. I'm not good at pretending to be Guy-ish. Woods. But I'm super gullible. Lauren. I have a crazy suggestion. Maybe you like somebody for their inside. Jay. I'm going to open my beer right as we start. Oh, great. Hope I like the warm up. On FM 94.9. Live Chris Cornell. Let's hear it in our live studio audience. Woods told me about this. It's called Songbook. Yeah. This is a little taste. He's got a record coming out at the end of the month. Just him and his acoustic. That's a real incredible instrument in his voice. Nobody else. Some of the best shows I've ever seen. I bet, dude. One of the best I have ever seen. My wife said it was her number one. Number one ever? Number one. Just him jamming with that acoustic. It's like being in a campfire with Chris Cornell.
This is the coolest. If you could pick a band that's not around anymore that you've never seen live, who would it be? To see live? Yeah. Zeppelin. Me too. Yeah. Zeppelin. How about you, LLB? I think I would do Zeppelin as well. Jay? I'd want to go back and see Queen. Yeah. That'd be cool. Stands to reason. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. For Jay. 100. Yeah. He's a Brian May fan. He's Brian May. No, Mike, I want to see him because the lead singer was gay and I was just like watching him prance around on stage. I love Freddie. Yeah, I love Freddie. Hell yeah. Seeing Queen would have been pretty rad, though. For me... Two songs. No, you're going to think this is ridiculous, probably, but it would actually be a toss-up between seeing Zeppelin in their prime or seeing Journey when they used to sell out stadiums. Wow. Because they would do stadiums, you know, when Steve Perry... I know, she's LLB. is barfing. It was my brother. In fact, Steve Perry's journey was awesome. Dude, they would sell out. In fact, there's a video of them. What's the old RFK Stadium in Philadelphia? The old one that had the disgusting turf. And they sold it out. RFK? RFK was in D.C. Yeah, no. What was it called? In Philly? The Vet? The Vet. The Vet. And my brother was really into them, so I was really into them, because I grew up hearing
the albums all the way back from the 70s all through the 80s. And I would have, and he used to go. And I used to beg. I would beg, beg. There's no way. He was never going to take me to one of those shows. No way. And I never did. And I've talked to people that have seen those shows. And they were incredible. I saw them a couple years ago, but not with Steve Perry. You saw them with Lau Fun. Yeah. And I actually liked the other fake singer before this fake singer. Oh, I didn't even know they had another fake singer. Yeah. His name was Steve, too. Oh, gosh. Oh, yes, I did know that. Yeah. You guys would make fun of me, but I would like to see The Grateful Dead. Yeah. I saw them without Jerry Garcia a couple times, but not the... same. What would you say, though, if you were telling us the truth? That is the truth. Yeah, if you just didn't want people to think that. That is the truth. I would smoke a lot of marijuana. Fresh marijuana cigarettes. But that would have been back in the day. That's not today. How about Pink Floyd? I would love to see the old wall. Zero. I missed a chance to see him. Really? I was making love. Yeah, and I couldn't get away. Takes about two weeks. They're at the Astrodome.
Coming through. And we did some stuff for the show, but I didn't go. It's bellproductions.com. You didn't go. I didn't go. Or it'll be written. It'll be written. .ca. Anybody else? Oh, there's a million. There's a million. The Beatles. I mean, Beatles. Oh, the Beatles. Elvis, I would have liked. Elvis, live. It's all Elvis, but I was a little kid. Otis Redding. I love it. I would have been a group. NWA would have been awesome. I'm serious. Public Enemy. I did see Public Enemy. Did you? Open for you too. Really? That was a hell of a show. Okay. This is good news for a lot of you because a lot of you would make this mistake. So I'm going to try to get you to not make this mistake. If you are ever giving a toast at a wedding, these are the things that you do not want to do. Never talk about the bride or groom's past relationships. And it happens. Absolutely. It happens probably in more weddings than less weddings. Yeah. Talking about passing. How many times at a wedding have you gone, hey, and I'll tell you what, I've been with this guy when he dated some pigs. This guy's run through a lot of tail. Let me tell you. Back in college, this guy would sleep with anything with a pulse. Her parents are like, oh, great. That's wonderful. It's wonderful. Last two weddings it came up. Last two weddings I've been to. Oh, my God. Are you serious? Oh, it's brutal. It's brutal. They think they're building up.
To how beautiful this day is. And now how I know this is going to be real because Mark could never find somebody as beautiful as Cynthia. You know? Right. Right. Well, and I remember too, we sat there in Mark's car when he first started dating Julie. Yeah. And he said, categorically, they were going to get married. That it was the one true love of his life. That he'd never meet anybody that he loved making love to more. Right. Kissing. Fondling. Touching, smelling her hair, feeling the way that her soft lips felt against his cheek. Petting. Petting. Heavy, heavy. Heavy, heavy, he would say. Dry hump. Yes. Grinding. And then he broke up with Julie, started to date Kristen, and he couldn't even do it because he was still hooked on Julie. Remember, Mark, when you said that you just needed one more taste and then you would go back? Do you remember that?
I'm just kidding. You went back. You went back. That's all that matters. I'm just kidding. And then he met Cynthia. Have you seen Wedding Singer? Not Wedding Crashers, Wedding Singer. Steve Buscemi is hammered, and he's on stage, and this dude is his brother, and he goes, Hey, you remember that time we went down to Mexico, and we got those... Well, I guess they were prostitutes, but I don't remember paying. Oh, my God. The look in the bride's eye is priceless. Here's another thing you don't want to talk about during a wedding toast. Don't talk about money. And what I mean by that is don't say, wow, this must have cost a fortune. Don't say that. It is not appropriate to talk about what things look like they cost. Just talk about how beautiful the wedding is. I should take notes for my maid of honor to possibly be and any possible best man that might be a part of it. There will be. The girls' speeches are always... No offense, ladies, but God, they're a whip. I brought down the house. Did you? You're a stand-up comedian, so I believe you. But most girls are like, oh my God, Julie, I love you guys so much. Let's bring up everyone. Listen.
Delta, delta, delta. You know when you know it's going to be bad? Is when that maid of honor stands up and she has three pieces of paper stapled together. And you go, oh, man. Oh, wow. I like to wing them. This is going to be a while. Do not mention hard times in the bride and groom's relationship. Oh, boy. I get up and I'm like, hey. I just want to say that I remember the first time I met L.O.B. and her and Matt broke up. And they were broke up for a while. Remember Matt? And then remember L.O.B. that time? Yeah, I do. You don't want to bring... No. What if you say, okay, none of us fought this day, whatever. Oh, my God. I mean, none of us. None of us. I mean...
You guys waited a long time. I'll give you six months. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. You know I'm joking. Hey, listen. You know the old phrase, don't buy the cow if you're getting the milk for free? Hey, and today to Julie's parents, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm kidding. I'm just kidding. Chances I drunkenly grabbed the mic at LOB's wedding at some point. A thousand. You just got yourself off the fake list. Yeah, a thousand. Fake list. Do not reference even sarcastically your own failed marriage. Even sarcastically. I would do that. Where you go, hey, these two are in love. It isn't like me. You guys know my thing, right? You guys know my deal. If I was divorced, I would do that 100%. I like to make people uncomfortable. And do not give backhanded compliments. And people do this all the time. She looks good. She was able to squeeze in that wedding dress. She's been working hard. Yes. You also don't want to say on a guy's wedding date, you don't want to say, I can't believe somebody like Jerry landed somebody like you. Oh, people say that all the time. I have an addition. Don't mention the honeymoon night.
Please, don't say, hey, you ain't going to be able to wear white after tonight, are you? And don't say, allude to sex. Hey, I better wrap this up because we all know they want to get out of here. Yeah, just don't allude to the honeymoon night sex. Remember that parents are there. And grandparents. And grandparents. And great-grandparents. Yes. And cousins. The best speeches I've ever seen have been the short and sweet with funny. But they don't even have to be funny. They can be sentimental, but short and sweet where you're just like, wow, you just packed a lot. That was a powerful little speech. I gave a speech at my friend Mike Duke's wedding. And I had prepared it. And it went really good. In fact, there were some people crying when I gave the speech. But Eddie got up before me. And I didn't know what he was going to do. He got up, and he went the funny route. And so his bit was, I remember when me and Mike Duke were back in Vietnam together, and nobody, and I'm dying laughing. I'm dying laughing, but I'm the only one. Because nobody knows us. Nobody knew us. And so then he's done, and I get up, and I'm like, four score and seven years ago. And I give this very, you know, because I had grown up with this dude, and it was.
And we're all done. And we're in the area where you get food. Weird. Weird. And this old woman comes up to me. Him and I are standing there. This old woman comes up and she goes, that was terrible what you did. Starts waving her finger. He's like, I was just kidding around. I was kidding. I was just kidding. Yeah, and she's like, and that was so sweet, what you said. What you said. What you said was so sweet. It was the sweetest thing ever. I was told in the limo on the way to my buddy Bobby's wedding that I was giving a speech because his brother could not be trusted to do it. Oh, my God. On the way. Meaning what? Meaning my brother's a moron. You're doing the speech. Even though he's my best man, you're doing the speech. What would he have done? Hey, thanks for having me. He's that guy. He wore the Merlin. He wore the Merlin shirt in Megan. That's him. Yeah. Enough said. So you had to do it. I had to do it. That's fantastic. On the way to the church, I was like, you have a pen and paper? Scribbled out some notes? New release is next. Let's make some noise in our live studio audience. On FM 94.9. One of the most anticipated annual concerts is back.
FM 94.9 Holiday Hootenanny presented by Coors Light. Saturday night, December 3rd at Jenny Craig Pavilion on the University of San Diego campus. Starring the band heralded by Rolling Stone, Spin, Pitchfork, and the New York Times as the best live band in America. My Morning Jacket. Also featuring Two Door Cinema Club. That and Kim. Delta Spirit. A blackout party. Tickets are on sale now. Get yours at tickets.com, the Jenny Craig Pavilion box office on the USD campus, or FM949SD.com. The FM949 Holiday Hootenanny 2011 is presented by Coors Light and supported by Spy Optics. Join us on Saturday night, December 3rd for an epic evening of music with FM949. So you blew it. You ate the donut. You slept in and skipped your workout. You had that second helping. Went a little overboard at the buffet.
Hit the candy jar at the office a little too hard. Stayed up way too late. You forgot to put safety first. You didn't eat your vegetables. You didn't even open that bottle of vitamins you bought. You accidentally left your gym bag at home. Your favorite machine was broken at the gym. Instead of your water bottle, you chugged a two liter of soda. You couldn't help yourself. You had a craving. Or you simply couldn't resist. But you know what? It's okay. Two steps forward and one step back is still one step forward. One slip up isn't going to undo all that good work. So don't be afraid to embrace your setbacks and do whatever it takes to keep trying. At Kaiser Permanente, we believe the more you keep trying, the better chance you have to turn bad habits into good ones. Because we think it's never too late to thrive. Keep up the good work at kp.org slash thrive. Hey, it's Mikey, and you've heard the good news about AIS. First of all, the government debt. They've been downgraded. The stock market is on a roller coaster. News of the economy is a mixed bag. Everybody's looking for ways to save money because it's uncertain economic times. Here's one piece of good news for you. AIS customers report an average savings of $500 a year on their auto insurance when they switch to AIS. I saved $1,600 a year. Now, how does AIS do it? Well, you don't have to call 10 to 20 insurance companies for quotes.
AIS does it for you. They shop dozens of insurance companies and find the best combination of price and coverage for all of your needs. So give them a call today. It's AIS. And look for discounts to qualify you. Some of them up to 20% off. And AIS never charges you broker fees. So your premium is all you pay for. If you haven't called AIS yet, make the call today for a free quote. 1-800-777-4AIS or go to AISinsurance.com. Good things come in threes, like three days of huge savings. Don't miss the three-day sale this Friday, Saturday, and Sunday at Vaughn's. When you spend $75 or more in a single transaction with Vaughn's Club, you'll get a $10 reward coupon for your next purchase. Stock up and save big this weekend. And keep the savings adding up. Check out these amazing Vaughn's Club deals, good only through Sunday. Rancher's Reserve Boneless Beef New York Steak is only $5.99 a pound in the Extreme Value Pack. Driscoll's Red Raspberries are two for $3, 5.6-ounce size. And it's your last week to stock up and save on wines for all your holiday needs before the sale ends. Use Vaughn's Club and get 30% off all wine in the store. Plus, save an extra 10% when you've bought six. Load up for the weekend. Stock up for the celebrations ahead. Don't miss the three-day sale this weekend only. Vaughn's, ingredients for life. Coupon expires November 13th. See store for details and list of excluded items. Vaughn's Club required.
Additional products and services will be offered for sale. Working harder but not getting ahead? The rich get richer no matter which way the economy is headed. Because today's times are filled with opportunity if you understand the new rules of money. You need to attend a free Rich Dad Education Workshop at hotels in La Jolla, San Diego, Del Mar, and Carlsbad. Based on the teachings from the best-selling book, Rich Dad, Poor Dad, this totally free 90-minute event will show you how to survive and build security during these hard economic times. We teach why your house is not an asset. may not want to diversify, why you may not want to invest in 401ks or mutual funds, why saving money will never make you rich. These are just some of Rich Dad's teachings that will change the way you think about money. Attend this free Rich Dad education training next Tuesday through Friday. Reserve your place at richdadsandiego.com. That's richdadsandiego.com or call 800-840-9409. That's 800-840-9409. Register now and get a free gift just for attending. Call 800-840-9409 today. Chevron Extra Mile's great selection of energy drinks allows me to stay on top of my game. They've got Van Hoot Coffee, Energy Shots, and Rockstar and Red Bull. Hey, you can hear those guys too, right? 15-ounce Starbucks Energy and Rockstar Roasted Drinks and 13.7-ounce Starbucks Frappuccino, any variety, two for $3.99 through January 1st, one at regular price. Chevron Extra Mile, extra easy, extra value at select Chevron locations.
Looking for a quick, delicious lunch? Try Olive Garden's new panini sandwiches. For just $6.95, enjoy a half-pressed panini and pair it with your choice of one of four unlimited homemade soups or fresh salad, both with all the warm breadsticks you want. Choose from three great panini varieties, like grilled chicken caprese or grilled steak and portobello. It's our $6.95 half panini lunch, here for a limited time, weekdays until 4 p.m., only at Olive Garden. Want to switch wireless companies but don't want to lose your number? Hurry and bring your number with you to your nearest cricket store and get an Android-powered smartphone starting at $39.99 while supplies last. You'll get a better phone, but you'll still be here. Offer in soon, so hurry in today. Good morning. And now back to the Mikey Show with Mikey. Don't really like to swim, unlike most Latinos. Woods. I can put down a 20-pack of chicken nuggets. No problem. Lauren. I got a little pepper up my nose. Had to sneeze. And Jake. No, I didn't cry. I'm a man. On FM 94.9. I was doing jazzercise today. It's real good. Yeah, I was last night. Is that what we're talking about? Oh. Oh, wow. I didn't know that there was a... Welcome back. All right. I have new movies out today. We already talked about the new movie from... No, I am in a play clip. Good.
Tower Heist. Tower Heist. Eddie Murphy. LLB. It's pretty good. In a robbery, things can change quickly. You go from hot to cold, just like that. You have to be ready to adapt to the situation. You have to be able to think on your feet. I was on a job a few days ago where my homie got shot in the face. He's kidding, right? If you get shot in the head, it's over. If you get shot in your head, it's over. If you get shot in your face, the bullet will go in your cheek. Then come out the other side. Then what you gonna do? Die. I'm going to die. I saw a television show once about a guy who got shot in the head with a nail gun. Couldn't even remember how to chew anymore. He had to put everything in a blender. Yo, he couldn't figure out how to chew, but he could operate a Cuisinart. I don't think he operated it. Cuisinart. Can we just focus, please? It's 16 degrees. That's right. Let's focus. It's Cuisinart. Cuisinart. I'm in. Oh, boy. I'll see it. Why, LLB? Why? Why are you so out? She's pleaving out so badly. Why are you out? It's like, it's so 90s to me. I'm not too. You are crazy. It's like Beverly Hills Cop. Because she's a movie snob and so are you because she said she's out, you're out. You don't like Beverly Hills Cop? I do like that, but this is like Beverly Hills Cop 90s up. 90s up. I don't like comedies. How would it sound? That's so... You're a freaking comedian. I know, but I don't like comedies. That's just ridiculous. Yeah. That's a ridiculous statement. They don't make me laugh. And not because I'm snobby. It's because it's either too dirty.
And I'm like, ah, man, it's not my thing. Or... I'm moist. I sleep. Too dirty. Or... Not funny? Dumb. What's the last good comedy you saw? I don't know. I don't know. You walked out of Horrible Bosses. Yeah. That was a horrible movie. Too dirty? It was pretty dirty. It's filthy. And we weren't, like, mad. We weren't like, you know, storming out. You didn't huff out a little bit? No. Not at all. You didn't miss anything. I'll tell you that much. I go, you want to go? She goes, yeah. That was it. It wasn't like, it just wasn't our style. It's not our style. I don't know what we expected. I love Jason Bateman. Yeah. And we thought it was, you know, but it wasn't my deal. I don't know. What was, what are some comedies that have been out in the last? Bridesmaids. That was hilarious. Filthy. I saw Bridesmaids. No, I didn't. It's filthy. Who's in it?
Kristen Wiig. Kristen Wiig. She wrote it. She stars in it. It's probably filthy. It's filthy. It's not filthy. It's not filthy. What? For him? There's a couple scenes that are filthy. Oh, dude. There's a couple scenes on the Mikey show that are filthy. It starts off filthy. Oh, yeah. The very first scene. Oh, yes. Okay, I can tell you the last movie I saw that made me laugh. And it was a little dirty. Something with George Pappard in it. No, it was the stepbrothers. Okay. That's genius. Yeah. It was good. It was a little dirty, but it made me laugh. Yeah. It's not dirtier than that, Bridesmaids. No. It isn't? No. No, okay. There's one scene. It's not dirty. It's just disgusting. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I'm a big fan of drama. I love westerns, dramas. Westerns? Historical. Yeah, I love westerns. Tombstone? Tombstone. How many times have you heard us? Something on your mind? 310 to Yuma. Have you seen that? I have not. I know. I know. I own it. Isn't that stupid? Dude, it's freaking brilliant. Is it? Oh, my God. It's brilliant. I know. Go watch it today. All right. You talked me into it. It's awesome. L.O.B., what do you got this weekend? I will be at Winston's tonight in Ocean Beach, slinging some jokes, doing some stand-up. What time? The open mic starts at 6, and then the feature show starts at 7. Easy. Wow. All right. If people want to see some open mic, come on out. There you go.
And Woodsy? U31. Sunday. Easy big time. Chargers Green Bay game. I'll be there from noon to two. Easy Joe Namath. Eating burgers real good. The place is the best burgers. U31's in North Park. New to two. And I'm heading to the San Diego Brewers Guild Festival tomorrow. Well, yeah, I'll be there too. You are? I was going to go, but I didn't get tickets. What are you going to ask Adam? Matthew Sweet, Telekinesis, Stone Foxes, tomorrow. What time does that go down, J-Vert? I believe that there's like a VIP thing. Eleven for VIP. One for just the general plebes. I love it. End of the show on Friday. I tell you my story. I give you my story. And it's hopefully something that you can relate to and that you can find hope from. Everybody at one time in their life has probably had periods of time where they felt hopeless. I've been there. And what I mean is my past is one of deep insecurity. I'm still insecure. It isn't like it was.
If I had to think of the words that describe my childhood the most, it's unsafe. I felt unsafe. I felt very unwanted. I had very low self-esteem. I felt very ugly. I've been addicted to everything. I've been addicted to cocaine, methamphetamine, pills, alcohol, pornography. All the stuff that I did to try to feel better was only temporary. And it brought on really, really, really shameful feelings. I've never known how to communicate with people. I've never known how to say things to people without hurting them. I've always known it. When I was in my late 20s, I started to drink. I probably hurt more people when I was drinking than any other time in my life. And maybe that's you. If you're experiencing any of this stuff, feelings of hopelessness,
If you're going through any kind of addiction, go to Mikey show.com. And at the top of the page, there's a, it says help click there. And there's all kinds of resources to help you out. The only reason that I tell this story on Fridays is because so many people have, um, have a similar story and their life has been changed by it, by me telling mine. And I don't like telling parts of my story. Some parts of my story are really embarrassing, like the sex addiction or the sex abuse when I was a kid. That is embarrassing to tell and shameful when that happened to me. But I tell you because it may have brought you to some place that I was, feeling of despair, feeling of shame, feeling of ugliness, all those feelings. 2003, I asked Jesus into my life and he changed everything. That's my story.
I'm not telling you that you need to do it that way. I'm just telling you that that's what happened with me. And it changed my life. At the end of the show, I play a song about hope. And this is an old school. It's called Tunnel. And the lyrics to the song may get you right where you are today. Don't forget to check out the help section of the website. Hillary's broadcasting live from Stone Brewery today. And we will see you again. on Monday. Mikey shows out. Have a great weekend.