The Mikey Show - Rock 105.3 - 01/16/09

0:08The plane took off from LaGuardia, and a couple minutes into the flight, the left engine just had a pretty big explosion. Fire started coming out, and I was kind of sitting, and I saw the fire coming out, and knew something wasn't right, and thought we'd circle back and land on LaGuardia or JFK or one, you know, and I just thought I was flying to the river, and we started losing altitude to Paris, man. A couple minutes later, the pilot just said, brace for impact, and that's what we all did, and just thought I would We landed, you know, and the plane filled with water really quick. It shook a bit, and immediately, you know, you could smell like smoke, like fire. And immediately the plane basically just started turning in another direction. Although it didn't seem like it was out of control, we knew something was going on. Like we were turning back, and, you know, nothing was happening. The smoke was still, you could still smell it. No one knew it was going on.

1:34All of a sudden, the captain came on and said, embrace for impact. And that's when we knew we were going down, and it seemed like into the water. And we just hit, and somehow the plane stayed afloat, and we all were able to get on the raft. And it's just incredible right now that everybody's still alive. This office before me, I have experienced setbacks. And there are things I would do differently if given the chance. Yet I've always acted with the best interests of our country in mind. All of my conscience on what I thought was right. The tough decisions I have made. But I hope you can agree that I was willing to make the tough decisions. While our nation is safer than it was seven years ago, the gravest threat to our people remains another terrorist attack. Our enemies are patient and determined to strike again. America did nothing to seek.

2:51We deserve this conflict. We've been given solemn responsibilities, and we must meet them. We must resist complacency. We must keep our resolve. We must never. And this has made some uncomfortable. Good and evil are present in this world. Between the two, there can be no compromise. Murdering the innocent to advance an ideology is wrong every time, everywhere. Freeing people from oppression and despair is eternally right. This nation must continue to speak out for justice and truth. We must always be willing to act in their defense and to advance the cause of peace. Well, it's been a pretty busy 24 hours since we last signed on the radio. And we're going to get into all of it. It's 6.05. Well, for those of you who haven't yet heard, yesterday a U.S. Airways jet...

4:06crash-landed into the Hudson River. Luckily, all 155 people on board the plane survived. This may be a bigger story. The Padres actually signed a player. Oh, my. Yeah, I know. They signed former World Series MVP David Eckstein to a one-year deal and say they're going to move him to second base. What do you think, Eddie? Um, you know, out of all the people to sign, it's not like I'm jumping for joy for David Eckstein, who's kind of on the downside of his career. But... He's better than what they have. I will say that. You also just heard audio of President Bush's farewell address. And on Tuesday, his presidency ends. Barack Obama's begins. And it's a new era. And so a lot of change happening. And the big news yesterday, so there I am. I'm at Frog's Fitness. I'm going from one machine to the other. I look up on the TV screens that they have on the machines, and I see what was so surreal, a plane floating in the water. Your brain's trying to make sense of what your eyes are seeing. Because you're like, am I really seeing a plane in the water? And it says U.S. Airways on the side of it.

5:22This guy was just telling us it was a plane crash in the Hudson River. The plane took off from LaGuardia, this guy, and was up for a couple of minutes. And what happened? Well, it's headed to North Carolina. And like you said, just minutes after takeoff, it hit a flock of birds. And the birds disabled its engine, and the pilot had to make an emergency call, you know. And the Hudson River, you know, was kind of the only unpopulated thing in between Manhattan and New Jersey, you know, because obviously you don't want to land anywhere where you are going to hurt other people who aren't even in the plane. So, you know, this pilot is being hailed as a hero for making this quick decision to land in the Hudson and the way he brought the plane down. And, yeah, all 105. 55 people on board were evacuated from the plane. No one died. The worst injury was somebody who broke both their legs. And then most of the other injuries were just mild hypothermia because it was like 20 degrees outside. So you can imagine how cold the water was. Oh, man. But it's really just a miracle all these people survived.

6:30It's amazing. From what I understand, you only have a couple of minutes in water as that temperature with hypothermia. And so, you know, hats off to the men and women that were out there helping them get out of the water, too. Oh, yeah. On the phone right now, I have an eyewitness to the plane crash, Tierney Santiago. Are you there? Tierney? Can you hear me? I don't think you hit the line. Tierney? Yep, I'm here. There you are. There you are. How are you? Good. Good morning. Did I say your name right? Is it Tierney Santiago? Yeah, that's my name. And Tierney, what part of Manhattan do you live in? I live on the Upper West Side. The plane passed right through here. Well, not through the neighborhood. Not through the neighborhood, but directly in your line of sight. Where were you when you saw it? I was actually driving down the West Side Highway, and the plane passed the traffic. It passed right by us. So it was really wild. I was traveling southbound in the same direction as the plane.

7:32I looked to my right and this airplane was almost, you know, just outside our windows and not going much faster than us or higher than us. And so that's what made it really freaky to see this plane just. Was the plane flying, was it flying sort of making a cross over the Hudson or was it flying in, you know, what is the word? Parallel. Parallel to the Hudson. It was flying perfectly parallel and perfectly centered to the Hudson, slightly nose-high. But the difference, which a lot of planes do fly up and down the Hudson, and that's a regular pattern, and you see it a little bit. But the thing is, this plane was really, really low, and it was nose-high, and it seemed like it was laboring. And the thing is, I was staring at it and staring at it. I mean, it's not going much faster than me. I'm going maybe like 75 miles per hour or so down the highway, and I'm looking over, and I can see the plane in detail. And it's not passing much faster than me. And I looked against, I was using it, you know, the Jersey skyline, which is what you see when you're coming down the highway. And I was like, is that plane going up or down? What's wrong with that plane? And the second I saw that it was actually descending, I said, oh, yeah, that plane is.

8:56Absolutely going into the river. And the plane is headed north or south? It's headed southbound. Okay, now let me kind of give people a little bit of perspective, okay? If you're looking at a map of Manhattan, Manhattan's an island. If you're looking at a map, where he's driving is along the shore on the left side of the map. And on the left side of the map is the Hudson River. On the other side of the island, and on the right side of that map, would be the East River. And so he's driving. I guess you're going in the same direction, so you're headed south. It'd be like you were headed down the map. Yeah, picture this. You're going down the highway, and the highway is basically sea level at the point where I was. And you look to your right, and you're driving basically on the river, right along the river. You're right up against it. So imagine looking to your right, and there's a plane. Just about right outside your window. It's amazing. It doesn't come flying past you. It's just slowly just going past you. It was going really, really slow. Which is part of how I think this pilot saved everybody. Jeremy, did you actually see the plane impact the water? Yeah, yeah. Well, what happened was the plane passes really slow. I knew.

10:14And, you know, post 9-11, you watch everybody, all the Manhattanites watch airplanes. And, you know, it's just you get used to staring at the plane patterns. And I knew, oh, this plane is going down. So I just happened to be coming right up on the exit that I was going to get off in my neighborhood anyway. And I slammed my car into the park, and I ran out of the car and ran to the leg. And right at that moment, I saw the plane splash into the river. Wow. And that's got to be a surreal thing to look at. It was surreal. It was, you know, it's kind of crazy that I had a video camera right on my front seat, but you're, you know, you couldn't, even if I had a second to lift up my camera, to even grab it, if I grabbed the camera and was sitting there trying to get ready, I wouldn't have seen it. So it was the first one I ran over, saw it splash, and yeah, you're thinking, oh my God. You don't even know what you're thinking. It's unbelievable that you're seeing this plane. Now the plane is just sitting right dead center in the middle of this river. Oh, my gosh. That's unreal. And when the plane actually makes impact, because we've seen the plane, it's fully intact. When the plane actually makes impact, what does that look like? It was eerily calm, actually.

11:39The plane did not fall into any pieces. There were no parts. There was no debris. There was a huge splash. And the plane did not, let's say, like slide across the river like it would have in a movie or some other type of craft. It sort of like came to an abrupt, from my account, the plane came to an abrupt halt with a big splash. And then right then I just started dialing 911. I clicked off a few pictures with my phone cam or camera phone. And then I started calling 911 right then. And people were asking me. People were pulling up right then. And people were pointing and going, oh, you're the plane. And I just said, yeah, yeah, that plane is in the river. It's in the river. So I ran to my car. And as I was screeching up, I head downtown towards that site because now it's about 20 blocks southbound. And your first reaction was, let me get down there. Help these people out. We're talking to Tierney Santiago. He was a witness to the plane crash that happened yesterday in the Hudson River. And so go ahead. You're thinking to yourself, hey, what can I do? Right. Even though it looks really calm and everything is intact, the plane is floating. And it's a freezing, freezing day yesterday and today in New York here. And so you're thinking.

13:06that these people are alive in there, but they're not going to last long because your first impression is that plane is about to sink. You get the impression that everybody's alive in there because everything looks perfectly fine and calm. But I grabbed 911. I was calling 911. And ironically enough, the phone kept ringing and ringing at 911. And that actually made me feel better because I wasn't thinking that they were sleeping in there. I was figuring they're overwhelmed, which is a good thing. Everybody saw it. Tierney, how long did you stay there where you were? I was actually down there for hours because I was right at the rescue site. And, you know, there was, you know, just hundreds of what seemed like hundreds of law enforcement and fire department and EMS. Suddenly you heard all the... I got down there. I was one of the first people down there. And then you heard all the... And it was just really... strange, too, because I was flying up through traffic for about a mile more, and you could tell none of these people, most of these people on the road did not see what was going on. So you're flying, you know, and bobbing through traffic, and none of these people know that there's a plane sitting in the river. You can't directly see it. You know, there's a lot of obstacles, you know, like certain buildings and, you know, just the angles, but you also know that there's thousands of people in the buildings that must have seen this, and then...

14:29So I ran over, let's say, by the piers, and then you start to hear all the sirens, and then you start over the course of the next few several minutes or so, you just start to hear all the sirens all over the city, and then literally hundreds of emergency services came down to there. Not thousands, I mean just tons and tons. And then soon after you saw, the first ones to respond were the commuter ferries. Something that people are mentioning, that the one way that the pilot happened to save these people alive, it was a bunch of things that was luck on their side in that the pilot went to midtown. He crashed it perfectly at midtown. If he crashed it uptown or up by the GW, they maybe would have... sank and then they would have, you know, drowned or something like that. Is the GW, is that the George Washington Bridge? I'm sorry, the George Washington Bridge just north. That's the bridge between Manhattan and New Jersey. He flew, from what I've seen, he flew over that because LaGuardia, with the angles and everything, he didn't even make it as north as the bridge. He was really only up for something like six minutes.

15:47So he flew down, and it just so happened he crash-landed it perfectly at Midtown. It just so happens that in Midtown, there were all the commuter ferries going back and forth across the river between Manhattan and New Jersey. So the ferries were the very first ones to respond. I could see that, and they all surrounded them, and they were helping everybody out. Tierney, how long did that take from the moment of impact to ferries making it to the airplane? How long did that take? That was the brilliant thing of it. It was something like, I think, under two minutes. Wow. That's amazing. Because those ferries happened to be right there. He crashed right where the ferries crossed. So the ferries, they didn't even have to start up and go, these ferries are crossing anyway. Tierney Santiago was a witness to the plane crash yesterday at the Hudson River. Tierney, did you see the cabin door open up at any point? Were you able to see that from your perspective? Yeah, the cabin door, the front cabin door opened. The tail was actually in the water more. So if the rear door would have opened, the plane, I would imagine, would have filled up real fast and gone under. But the front was higher and above the water. And then eventually the people, they got out, and then they were surrounded by ferries and rafts.

17:07What did you see as the door opened up? Did you see an airline attendant standing there in the doorway opening it? I mean, what did you see? Well, at this point, he put it right in the middle of the river. Now, the gap at the river there is actually really wide. And then at that point, the ferries literally surrounded the plane. So you could, you know, at that point... the view was starting to get more obstructed. Got it, got it. But you could see it open, and you could see heads going back and forth. And, you know, I think everybody there at the piers was guessing, oh, you know, these are the passengers now getting off of that plane. And were they taking them to the, I'm assuming, are they taking them to the Jersey side or the Manhattan side? They were going out. You know, so many people responded in these ferries and emergency services. They went to the west side, upper west side, and they also went out to New Jersey. Amazing. That's an amazing perspective and something that you'll never forget. Tierney, if we put you on hold, can we give you an email address and have you email us the photos that you took from your phone? Yes, sure. That'd be awesome just to see what that perspective was like and what you got to see and where you were. Do you have kids? My shot is unique in that you don't see.

18:34You don't see anything around the plane. It's actually a fairly distant shot. You can see the plane in the background, and there's nobody near it. There's nothing happening. It's just a plane in the river. We'd love to see that. That's a perspective none of us will ever experience. Do you have kids? I do not. One of these days, you're going to be telling kids about this at some point, like where you were that day. A day in Manhattan's history. And the coolest thing about it is that everybody lived. It's not a sad story. I mean, it didn't end in a bad ending. It ended good. And so how late did you stay up watching the news? Funny enough, I stayed up all night. When I was down there at the site, I didn't really know sort of what angle, like how to talk about it because we didn't have the news. We weren't listening to the news, and it was freezing, and I didn't know if anybody had lived or there were serious injuries or what, so I didn't really know how to talk about it, and I was sort of tentative on how I talked about it. But during this morning, I'm really glad to talk about it, and I'm really happy to talk about it. What the pilot did was perfect. They're not exaggerating at all. What that pilot did was perfect. If you watched it, there is no exaggeration.

19:48It all comes down to the pilot. He saved everybody. That's amazing. Well, listen, we do appreciate you coming on, Tierney. This is Tierney Santiago, and he was in his car. He's driving south on the West Highway and saw this happen yesterday. Hey, we appreciate your perspective. Thanks for coming on. Sure thing. Thank you. There you go. That's Tierney Santiago. What a trip. And like I said, man, it's just so cool that it was a happy ending. That ended in good news. There's an amazing shot in the USA Today front page of the plane in the river with just a bunch of people on the wings. That's unreal. Standing in the water waiting for them to be rescued. It's unreal, man. My wife is afraid of flying. Her most anxious time is right when the plane takes off. I don't really have much of a fear of flying. But my fear is usually when we're landing, for some reason, I get kind of nervous on landing. Because I always am anticipating how gentle is this going to be or how kind of rough is this going to be. And when you hear the engines powering up to sort of help stop the airplane, that's always an anxious time for me. But yesterday, I was thinking, oh, man, I got to tell my wife, have you seen the news yet? And she's going to say no.

21:16And she didn't say, what happened? I'm going to say, there's a plane floating in the water. She's not going to like that. Because her whole thing is when you leave San Diego, there's the water that you fly over. And that's her deal. Oh, there's an airplane in the water. No, what? Everybody's good. She goes, oh. And then we turn it on. She goes, oh. Poor thing. Couldn't believe it. It's crazy that a flock of birds can bring down a plane. That's crazy! We think we're so powerful and our technology is so great. A flock of birds. How have we not figured that one out, by the way? I'm kind of surprised there isn't something in place for that. Couldn't they just put some chicken wire in front of it? Wouldn't that work? Why can't we do that? Patent pending. So, anyway, that is the big news. And then President Bush's farewell speech was the big news last night. And the big news here on the Mikey Show is that Boston Rob and Boy Blunder are going to be doing the comedy showdown. She's so good. Don't worry. Boy Blunder's pipes are kind of, you know, scratchy today. I heard him talking. He was like... Like North Turner. Yeah.

22:36I tend to think it adds to my sexiness. Oh. Listen to that. Guess what? You're getting over a cold? Is that it? Yeah, something just decided to settle right here. Oh, wow. Well, I can't wait to hear what this material is. Blunder's all blue. It's just all really raunchy, dirty, and just filthy humor. It's like Richard Fryer. Yes. It's just all F-bombs. I was freebasing the other day. That would mean he would get the F word on for a third time. It would be a record third time. Somehow, seven times in a row. Has anyone seen the studio yet? Yeah. The studio that we're going to be doing this in? Oh, yeah, dude. I was practicing my set this morning. Were you really? Yeah. It looks awesome. That's what it's called. That's what it's called, right? Yeah. Five minutes. You got five minutes ready to go? I got about eight. Oh, Blunder. Oh, Blunder. Now, check this out. That's okay. I've got about the same. That's fine. I figured we could just do our set until we're... Blunder. Oh, no. When you have been doing your open mics, how long is your set? That lasted for about two, maybe two and a half minutes. That's it? It wasn't from a lack of material. It was from me getting up there and just being like,

24:02There are people down there, and they want to laugh, and I don't know if I'm going to be able to do that. How many times have you done open mic? I did it about five or six times now. Okay, so you eventually got over that and were able to do longer than two minutes, right? No. No, you never did. Oh, my God. So today, let me ask you then. So today you're getting up, and you're going to probably go longer than you've ever gone. Yeah, pretty much. If you go eight minutes, it'd be longer than you've gone on stage. Oh, if you go five minutes, it's longer. Sure. Right. Yeah, absolutely. According to him, if he goes three minutes, it'd be longer than he's ever gone. And I like his sex life. Okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Well, Rob, that's kind of got to give you a little hope, right? It does and it doesn't. Because I had no idea he had already done this five or six times. I thought he was a little bit more seasoned than I'm scared two minutes off the stage. I did. I thought that he'd done this a few times and it had kind of gone well. That sounds like he's kind of, you know, uh-oh, I'm out of here. Yeah, but now he knows now. You know, he knows what he's done. He knows what he's done. This is my first time, so who knows if I do two minutes. You're going to kill it. Fall out. You know? So, play Blunder.

25:23The only thing I'll say, too, is that I learned a lot from those open mics. That voice is so distracting. I've been trying all week. That's why it's distracting. It's so beautiful that it's a unicorn. It's like Rachmaninoff brings tears to your eyes. Unreal. Unreal. You listen to me. That's your first and last reference to Rachmaninoff music bringing me to tears today. That's your first and last. Beautiful things. All right. I was just, anyway, I was saying, I learned to, you know, actually memorize the material. Blender, listen to this voice. What are you going to be? Sean. Give me a break. I've got to focus here. I'm going to go gargle with some salt water before I get on stage and, you know. Oh, I think that's what happened. This is so cool. He needs mouth-to-mouth. Help him out. He needs some peanut butter. That's what he needs. Wait a minute. I wonder if either one of them will have material about the other. I have no idea what Rob's doing. I have no idea what Blunder's doing. I tried to stay far away from any roast type stuff just because I felt like that was maybe like...

26:38you know, an out for me. The easy way out. Yeah, yeah. So I tried to stay as far away from that stuff, and I just wanted to... The one who just gave a look like, not me. Oh, really? Are you kidding me? My entire set is making fun of myself. Oh, oh, oh, making fun of yourself. Oh, yeah, yeah, of course. He's eating a roast. Eddie, it's not your time, Eddie. It's so hard. Two people on this stage at one time, all right? It's so hard. Hey, uh... Mal is going to be doing a set, too. Now, Mal is actually a comedian that has done this before and actually kills, and he's good. In fact, I said to everybody here in the studio a couple weeks ago, I said, I think that guy can be famous because he's got a lot of the right things going on, and he's pretty good. Mal is going to be the emcee for it today. We've got seven people on the show. Let me introduce everybody. I'm Mikey. I'm the host of the show, and I'm 38 years of age, if you're keeping a scorecard at your house. Eddie is 35, and he is our producer and our sports guy. Sky is 31 years old, rocking the headband. I'm loving it, and it's looking sweet. Thank you, thank you. Sean is 38 as well. He's our sound effects guy. He's not here in San Diego. He's up in the Bay Area, and he makes sound effects like this.

27:59this. There it is. Ashley is our assistant producer and she got her hairs did and she's looking great today. She is 25 years of age and Boston Rob is our stunt boy. He's our stand-up comedian. He is our professional stand-up comedian. Very green. He's the best. That's right, he is. And he's going to be beat. I'll tell you that. Oh, wow. Can be beat. Can be beat. Wait. Wait. That's fantastic. Did we decide on how who's going first or anything like that? Maybe we'll flip a coin. Okay. Flip a coin. Do you have a preference? Blender should. You don't have a preference. If you don't have a preference, then it's easy. You could go first. Right. You're the seasoned vet. Are you sure, Blender, that you're fine going first and letting him? No, you go. We'll flip a coin. I'm cool with that. Okay. Now his story changes. Blender's like, well, there must be something too going second. Okay, fine. I'll flip a coin. And then there is the artist formerly known as Sir Roosevelt Zethian Oates III, Jr., Esquire, MD, DDS, President, and CEO.

29:26All right, Cherry's Jubilee, and that's it. That's it. Good girl. Oh, wow. Yep. Could be one of those, Mike. Text messages are 35253. This text says, Hey, Mikey, me and my wife went to Black Angus, and we had a $43.89 bill. She wanted to tip $1.11 to make $45 even. She is a worse tipper than Sean, P1, my wife. That's not possible. That's not possible. Sean is the worst tipper in the history of that. I would say fair tipper. Sean Sky and I had to go back to a restaurant out of humiliation and embarrassment to tip a waiter because we found out that you hadn't tipped. You know what? Well, that's not true. It's not that I didn't tip.

30:20You tipped $5 on a $75 bill. I mean, there was a whole group of us. I don't know that I was that generous, but the truth is that the guy was a tragedy as a way. I mean, the guy was the worst waiter probably that I've ever had. This story, Sean over-exaggerates this story more and more every time. He was a tragedy of a waiter. So dramatic. It was the lunch rush, Sean. It was busy in there. What I remember is that it took about 10 minutes for Sean. to get water. I've been to lunch many times and I've never had that level of treatment before. Treatment. In a word, Mike, it was abysmal. He was so dramatic. It was an abomination, really. He's nuts. He's nuts. He's nuts. He's out of his mind. Lots of issues. Lots of them. Mikey, I'm just waking up and I just heard you say something about a flock of seagulls brought down a plane. What is this? It's P1 Instigator. Oh, Sean, talk about it. That's right. No, it wasn't. Ladies and gentlemen, the show today is ginormous. And by the way, we do have...

31:32P1 Tony in the studio today, and he killed it on P1 Trivia, and so he's in the studio, got to come hang out with us. Every Friday, we let a listener come into the studio and hang out. We also had somebody else win. They didn't show up. Is that the deal? Yeah. He called them, and she's sick. Yeah. Got it. Well, then I don't want any germs around this. Stay home. Stay home, please. No. So P1 Tony's getting to hang out in the studio, get a backstage pass, and take part in the festivities. And our phone number, 570-1053. Our text number, 35253. And if you'd like to leave us a message on our answering machine, it's 858-715-1923. Big day today on the show. Big day. We're going to be doing Weekend Worry Award. So a little bit later on, we're going to be doing Weekend Worry Wart. If you have something that's going on this weekend that you are nervous about, you are just tripping out, you can't believe what's going to be going on in your life this weekend, we want to hear about it. Are we doing that before 7? Because I'd like to call. Yes, we are. And then, of course, we've got the big comedy showdown between Boston Rob and Boy Blunder.

32:42They're both going to do stand-up comedy in our performance studio with a live studio audience. For my first time. That's right. That's right. We're going to do Ask the Oracle. So if you have sports questions for Eddie. Is everybody all right? Thank God we're all safe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If we stay in this for a couple more minutes, we're going to freeze to death. I love you. Okay. That is weird. Odd, isn't it? Really weird. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, listen, she's a fan, and she'll have some sports questions for you a little bit. Accept me. What does that mean? Well, it means she wants you to accept her. For what? I don't know. She loves you. Will you love her? I think is what she's saying. I love you. Accept me. I think is what she's saying there. Will you accept her? It's not working, Ash. I don't know. I mean, you're going to have to ramp it up a little bit. Oh, no. No, no, no. I got an idea. Ash.

33:55Try this. Give me back my Eddie. Okay. That's stupid. How do you feel now, Eddie? Stupid. How about that? Now do you have me back? Please. So listen, all of this is coming up on the show. The comedy showdown is in 25 minutes. Oh, jeez. What? 25 minutes. 25 minutes? That's right. Oh, dude, I'd be freaking out. Lewis Black in the stand-up spotlight. Like you show stand-up spotlight. Here's why I think there's something a little odd with George. Because a lot of the times when he speaks, his words don't match his face. Something is a scheme. You can't talk about the war in Iraq with a smile on your face. He does it constantly. You have to, if you're the president, you have to say we're going to talk about the war.

35:18I must have a frowny face. The only time you can have a smile when you're talking about the war in Iraq is when you go, well, two Iraqis walked into a bar. This is the Mikey Show. So you're the guy who pooped in my tuba. 105.3 AutoZone. Are you overdue for an oil change? If so, don't put your car's engine at risk. Get in the zone. Now at AutoZone, get five quarts of Pennzoil conventional motor oil and a Fram Extra Guard oil filter for just $16.99. That's right. $16.99. Some restrictions apply. See store for details. Don't wait until it's too late. Maximize your engine's life and performance. Get to AutoZone. Do it yourself and save. Get in the zone. AutoZone. Hey, let me tell you, so I mentioned it earlier. I was at Frog's Fitness working out yesterday, and it's actually where I saw what was going on with the plane crash that had just happened, and it's because those machines all have the screens, and so I was there with my

36:19My trainer, Wendy, we were able to get on a machine and keep working out and keep following the story, which is really cool, man. Those machines with the TV screens on them are amazing. I don't know if they have cable or if they've got a satellite dish or whatever, but we were flipping through and watching CNN's coverage and watching the network coverage, and it's amazing. I like being able to watch Food Network while I'm working out. That's just me. But they are top-notch, man. The folks over at Frogs Fitness are top-notch. The trainers are top-notch. I work out at the one in Encinitas, and Wendy's my personal trainer, and she's great. And if you are looking to get in shape for the new year, the new you is right around the corner. There's Frogs Fitnesses throughout San Diego County. Check them out, Frogs Fitness. Hi, is this where I sign in for the Worldwide Interglobal Micro Macroeconomic Conference? Yes, but the Worldwide Interglobal Micro Macroeconomic Conference is a gathering of leading financial experts. And you seem to be a burrito. Actually, I'm the cheesy double beef burrito from Taco Bell. You do sound delectable. But can you describe your economic theory? Seven words.

37:29Double the beef for only 89 cents. Double the beef for only 89 cents? How's that for a bailout plan? My apologies, Mr. Cheesy Double Beef Burrito. You're clearly one of the great economic thinkers of our time. Apology accepted. By the way, double the beef for only 89 cents is actually eight words. Yeah, I was never good with numbers. Taco Bell's Cheesy Double Beef Burrito. A double portion of seasoned beef smothered in warm melty nacho cheese sauce. It's double the beef for only 89 cents. Think outside the bun. Double the beef compared to Burrito Supreme. At participating locations, prices may vary tax extra. Guess what crazy people are trying to take over the mall. The only man for the job is Blart. He is a pro. Blart. Blart? We're not Blart and Jelly. What's up, man? Kevin James is... Safety never takes a holiday. Paul Blart's Mall Cop ADPG. Now playing... Skiers and snowboarders get incredible savings at the annual ski and snowboard mega sale. Today through Saturday only at the Del Mar Fairgrounds. Free admission and up to 70% off on everything for the slopes. Details at sandiegomegasale.com. Do you know a new study from Carfax shows that the number of salvaged cars for sale in the United States has more than doubled? Avoid buying one of these rebuilt wrecks. Ask your used car dealer for a free Carfax vehicle history report. I took the time last weekend.

38:53I took the time at lunch. I took the time with my son. Please don't assume someone else is going to give blood in your place. San Diego Blood Bank. Schedule an appointment at sandiegobloodbank.org. Hey, it's Boston Rob from The Mikey Show. During the holidays, I made a lot of calls back home to the East Coast, and I never had to watch my minutes because I have Time Warner's home phone service. Time Warner's free long-distance calling plan is wicked awesome. I can spend as much time as I want talking to all my family back East. And if I want to drop my family an email, I get it done with their Roadrunner Internet service. Time Warner's Roadrunner Internet service is 20 times faster than AT&T's basic DSL. During the holidays, I finished all my online shopping with a quickness. And I am never waiting when it comes to Roadrunner High Speed Online. It's wicked fast and blows DSL away.

39:46Switch to Time Warner today and save. 800-872-0185. They have bundles as low as $75 a month. Give them a call now. 800-872-0185. Or check them out anytime at timewarnercable.com. Some restrictions apply. Roadrunner speeds may vary. Cash rebate applies to value purchase triple play customers only. The Mikey Show continues featuring Mikey. I love cars. Eddie. I think I'm immune to Captain Morgan's now. Sky. I am the Google Oracle. Sean. I think about death all the time. Boston Rob. I'm getting real big into jujitsu. And Ashley. I want to eventually join a hip-hop group and, like, perform on the weekends. The Mikey Show's on. Rock 105.3. Back into Mikey's show. It is 642. Well, comic book geeks unite. 20th Century Fox and Warner Brothers have finally reached a settlement for Watchmen, allowing it to be released on its scheduled date. The Dodgers are parting ways with their center fielder, Andrew Jones, after signing him to a huge deal last offseason. The team released him yesterday. Oh, wow. Whoa. There you go, Padres. No. What? No. There were two kind of bizarre stories yesterday happening here in San Diego, one in Lakeside and one in Vista that involved either an attack or an attempted attack.

41:26In different parts of town, right, Skye? Yeah, so first we'll talk about the Vista one. A 14-year-old girl was on her way to school at Vista High School. Now, the attack happened on East Indian Rock Road, just a few blocks away from the school. And basically, this guy approached this girl and... started talking to her, and she, you know, stopped to, like, see what he wanted or whatever. He asked her to pull down her pants, and then he tackled her and punched her in the face. Now, of course, police believe he was attempting to rape her, but luckily he was scared off by some approaching kids. Some kids were coming around and scared him off. So they didn't catch him? No. So he's described as a white or Hispanic man between 17 or 23 years old, somewhere in there, 17 to 23 years old, about 5'8", 160 pounds, with hazel eyes. And, of course, they're reminding students and, you know, girls especially, always walk in groups, you know, stay in, you know, don't take the shortcuts through the wooded areas.

42:37You know, just be extra safe. And then what happened in Lakeside? Yesterday in Lakeside, a 15-year-old El Capitan High School student was walking to school when she was harassed by a man. She's a ninth grader. It was about 7 o'clock in the morning just east of the campus. And the girl said she saw a guy in a silver car following her. And the stranger, the guy, made several offers to give her a ride, like, come in the car, I'll give you a ride to school. And, you know, she told the cops that she, you know, was ignoring him and not having it. And then finally he got out of his car and approached her and put his hand on her shoulder. And at that point, she ran into a store that was right there and asked for help. Did she get a description of the car and all that kind of stuff? Well, a silver car is the only description I have here, but she did give a description of the man. A muscular-looking Latino man, about 5'8", who appeared to be in his 40s, short, black, and gray hair.

43:42jeans, a dark blue jacket, and a blue baseball cap. If any of that sounds familiar to you... Yeah, anyone with info, call the police. Call the police. Let's see, what else is... Oh, the Lions, right, Eddie? They hired their guy? Yeah, they finally have a new head coach. Who is it? Well, they hired Titans defensive coordinator Jim Schwartz, which I found kind of interesting, meaning that, you know, Rod Marinelli was a defensive guy, too, so... You know, you're basically replacing one defensive-minded head coach with another one. Yeah. You know, so I was kind of surprised by that. And they were interviewing Ron Rivera for it, too. Yeah. So, you know, it's just, I don't know. If I were the Lions, I think I would probably go in a different direction. I mean, obviously, 0-16, that philosophy didn't work. But, you know, Jim Schwartz has been an up-and-coming guy for a while. And, you know, he'd probably be a good head coach.

44:39The Detroit Lions, dude. They're pretty pathetic. What's up with Mark Sanchez? Has he made a decision yet or what? Yeah, he made it official yesterday. He's going to enter the NFL draft. So he will be available. And some are putting him as high as a top 10 pick. Wow. Yeah, and here's him talking about it. It's cut 46. As most of you know, I've been considering. entering myself and this future opportunity to declare for my eligibility for the NFL draft. I've toiled over it for a few days now. But in the end, after sleepless nights and lots of prayer, I have decided that I will forego a fifth year at USC and declare my eligibility for the 2009 NFL draft. The fifth year? How does that work out? He probably was a redshirt freshman. So it gives him another year of eligibility. What does that mean? When you have like an injury or I think you can do it if, I'll have to look it up, but there's a couple of ways you can redshirt your freshman year, which means you're on the team, but you don't play. So you get another year of eligibility. So I guess that's what he did. But, you know, Pete Carroll, the head coach there, wasn't really thrilled with the decision.

46:05by Sanchez. He kind of made some comments yesterday that kind of struck me a little odd that he was like basically saying, you know, oh, well, you know, junior quarterbacks coming out, they don't have the best record, but, you know, we tried to talk to Mark about it, but Mark was, you know, all for going out. So I was like, ooh. Would a coach ever really be excited for a junior to go into the draft? I mean, wouldn't they always want them to wait out? Yeah, somewhat. I mean, there are, you know, coaches that recognize, like, dude, this guy can't do anything else. Yeah, he's too talented. Yeah, he's great, and he's going to make millions of dollars, and yeah. Wow. But, you know. Is he going to be a good NFL quarterback? I think so. I think so. I mean, he runs that pro-style offense right now in USC, and, you know, he's got the NFL-type body and stuff like that, so I think he's going to be real good. Brett Favre-like NFL-type body? Nobody knows that. Yeah, yeah. Come on, please. That's a ridiculous question. I was watching ESPN, and they were already doing their projections for the draft, which is really early. And there's probably going to be some other guys and stuff like that. But they had him going 10th to the 49ers. Really? Oh, look at that. They had Mark Sanchez going to the 49ers 10th? Yeah. Oh, wow. Wow, they really quit on Alex Smith, huh? Oh, please. That's all done, right? Oh, he's still there, but, I mean.

47:29With all the injuries he's had, he's had new offensive coordinators every single year he's played. That poor guy needs a breath of fresh air. He probably will be cut or something. Hey, Congress okayed the second half of that dough, the bailout dough. They've apparently okayed it to be given out, right? Yeah, well, to the Obama administration next week, money, money, money, so they can start working with that and see how they want to use that. They say it amounts to about $350 billion. The Obama administration has been talking about tax cuts for the middle and lower class, has also been talking about a lot of public works projects, using that money to create a lot of jobs and also help. Local economies by, you know, building freeways and bridges and stuff like that, creating jobs as well as putting money into local economies.

48:30So we'll see how he uses the money. But yeah, yesterday, Congress okayed the second half of that bailout money to him. And of course, one of the things Obama has said is that he really wants oversight on this money. He's not just going to give it to companies and say, good luck. He's going to watch how it's spent and make sure it's spent properly. That's a good idea. Yeah, you think? Let's do that. You know, our Best Hub CD is available at MikeyShow.com for $10. All the money going to Ladies Children's Hospital. It's our best FCD for the year 2008. It's called Sweet Berry Wine. About 10 minutes away, dude. What? And I've got a couple of texts from P1s. If you're coming to this comedy showdown out front by the glass doors, we'll come and get you. People are texting. They don't know where to go in the building. It's going to be awesome. Boston Rob is going to be in our performance studio, and so is...

49:30Boy Blunder. And they're going to do stand-up comedy against each other, and we're going to vote and see who wins. Let's see. Oh, you want to do a weekend worry work? Call us right now, 570-1053. Call us right now if you've got something big coming up this weekend that you want to tell us about, that you're nervous about, that you're tripping out about. Is it a relationship thing? Is it a financial thing? Is it a big decision that you're going to be making? Whatever it is, if you have something big coming up this weekend. Call us right now, 570-1053. When we come back, Nutrition Advocacy Group has filed a lawsuit over vitamin water. Doesn't Fiddy own a big portion of the vitamin water? So when we come back, we'll tell you why. Don't go away. The Mikey Show. Oh, yes!

50:28Are you credit challenged? Having a tough time purchasing anything? You won't at USA Discounters, your incredible credit store. If you need furniture, computers, electronics, flat screen TVs, tires, rims, and much more, USA Discounters offers fast automatic approval for all who qualify. No cash up front and no payments for 60 days. Make USA Discounters your place to shop. Go to usadiscounters.net for directions and information. Shop online or call 877-870-7700 to speak to one of their credit counselors and get automatically approved. Get the credit you deserve plus immediate delivery with no money down for 60 days. USA Discounters is your one-stop shopping for the brand name quality items you want. furniture, electronics, and even jewelry at low, low monthly payments with no cash up front. Too good to be true? Call now and find out if you qualify. 877-870-7700 or go to usadiscounters.net. USA Discounters, 476 Broadway in Jula Vista. Certain restrictions may apply. Contact store for details. If you have acne, here's a phone number you need to call. 1-800-300-8455. Right now, we're looking for the biggest skeptics out there to test out a skin-clearing breakthrough risk-free.

51:39People who are sick and tired of wasting money on acne products that just don't work. If that's you, give us a call. We're going to prove you can make your acne disappear and have clear skin by sending you a 60-day trial of proactive solution absolutely risk-free with our compliments. Find out how to get your risk-free 60-day trial by calling 1-800-300-8455. Our combination therapy system uses prescription-grade acne medicine and soothing spa-quality botanicals to create a powerful acne-fighting system. It's so effective, it transforms blemishes and bumps into clear, smooth skin and skeptics into believers. You can have beautiful, healthy-looking skin. Put us to the test and we'll prove it. Get your risk-free 60-day trial by calling now toll-free. 1-800-300-8455. 1-800-300-8455. You feel like you're in a dream. A dream where Rubio's crispy shrimp is back and a crispy shrimp two taco plates sits in front of you. The shrimp so crisp, its creamy ancho chili sauce so tasty. The beans and chips so fresh. Is this real? If so, could this entire Rubio's meal really cost only $5.99? You turn to your wife and ask her if you're dreaming.

52:48No, she says, but you are drooling. Get a crispy shrimp, two taco plates, including beans and chips, all for just $5.99 for a limited time at Rubio's. It doesn't come in a bottle or pill. I don't have to buy it from some guy on the street. I never have a hangover, no matter how much I've indulged. Just one taste seemed to make all my problems melt away, like fog in the sunshine. Work, family troubles, money worries were all replaced with a... Pain-killing numbness. For a while, it seemed perfect. Then my gambling got out of control. That's right. I'm talking about gambling. Slot machines for me. Video poker too. For most people, it's just entertainment. I became, well, before it was over, I lied. I wrote bad checks. I was no longer there for my kids. I'm not a bad person. I just lost my way. If my story sounds like yours, call 1-800-GAMBLER.

53:50Get help. Call 1-800-GAMBLER. A message from the California Office of Problem Gambling. Former UFC middleweight champ Rich Ace Franklin takes on former pride welterweight and middleweight champ Dan Henderson. Plus, Mauricio Shogun Hua looks to avenge his loss to UFC Hall of Famer Mark the Hammer Coleman. The Ultimate Fighting Championship presents UFC 93, Franklin vs. Henderson from the O2 Arena in Dublin, Ireland. Saturday, only on pay-per-view. Visit 93.ufc.com for details. Cards subject to change. Hi, this is the collections department of... Oh, yes. Some things have come up and... You've been missing payments for a while. Maybe you should call In Charge Debt Solutions, a non-profit company that can help you get debt-free. They'll help lower your interest rates and stop the collection calls. So I won't hear from guys like you anymore? Yeah, something like that. Make the time to call In Charge Debt Solutions for your free consultation. 1-800-900-6135. 1-800-900-6135. 1-800-900-6135. Hungry for a great deal? Now at Togo's, get daily specials for only $3.99. A new sandwich every day. Get your favorite Togo's sandwich for only $3.99. For a limited time only. Great sandwiches, great value. Only at Togo's.

55:11There's a difference between hearing your name like this. Courtney Mortimer. And hearing it like this. Courtney Mortimer. There's a difference when you're introduced as. She's my cousin Gloria the architect. Versus being introduced as. She's a visionary architect from Laguna Hills that plays the violin. Put your hands together and say hello to Gloria Gruber. And finally, there's a difference when someone tells you. Good job, Michael. compared to them saying, Good job, Michael. You are going back to Rancho Cucamonga with $1 million in your pocket. What's the difference? It's Make Me a Millionaire, the new game show from the California Lottery. where people from all over California play for a chance to win millions. Buy Make Me a Millionaire Scratchers today, and you could be on your way to getting on television, hearing your name called, and winning millions. Please play responsibly. Must be 18 or older to play. The California Lottery, a state of winning. What is racing done California style, you ask? Well, it all starts with the West Coast premiere of NASCAR. This means blurred blue walls.

56:19200-mile-per-hour straightaways, games, live music, activities for the whole family, roaring crowds, and home sweet home to the three-time defending Sprint Cup Series champion. And there's only one place to catch it, the Auto Club 500, Sunday, February 22nd at Auto Club Speedway. For tickets and more information, call 800-944-RACE or visit AutoClubSpeedway.com. Everyone wants to save some green today, and Henry's Farmer's Market makes it happen. With Henry's, 72-hour sale now through Sunday. With savings, like boneless, skinless chicken breast. $1.77 per pound. Haas avocados, three for a dollar. Plus 25% off all vitamins and supplements. Chase and Suzuki Motorcycles present the Sandy Cali Ford Dealers. Picketmaster, the box office, or South Bay Motorsports Suzuki. Chicken subject for convenience seats. All seats, $2 more. To the Mikey Show, featuring Mikey. I picked my nose a lot. Eddie. I just want my sandwich. I like I want my sandwich. Skye. I enjoy presents. What can I say? Sean. I'm... I'm kind of the transient of the bunch. And Ashley. I'm a very loving, nurturing person. On Rock 105.3. It is 7 o'clock. Well, this is just lovely. Five East County high schools have sent letters home to parents to let them know that a cancer-causing chemical has been found on campus. This will fire you up, Rob. The Red Sox gave Kevin Euclid a four-year, $40 million extension avoiding arbitration. Yeah! Does that make you happy, Rob? Oh, yeah, it does. Love you.

58:30Every day we hear something about the Boston Red Sox through Boston Rob. You know what I mean? Every single day. I'm so glad. There's one thing that we'll hear no matter what. Chunky way. Mike, that's what it is, right? Chunky way? Yes. Let's see. Okay, so before we went to break, I told you that a nutrition advocacy group has filed a lawsuit over vitamin water. What is it about, Skye? Well, the Center for Science in the Public Interest has filed this lawsuit against Coke. Now, the Coca-Cola company is the owner of vitamin water, and they say that Coke uses deceptive claims about vitamin water. They say that vitamin water is basically sugar water, but that Coke tries to sell it claiming it has vitamins in it that boost immunity and reduce the risk of disease. They say that the claims that Coca-Cola makes are total nonsense and have filed a class action lawsuit against it. Yeah, the director of the group says, quote, it truly shocks the conscience that a company like Coke would try to keep customers by selling them a soft drink and telling them that it's a vitamin. Really? Yeah. Dude. Now.

59:51I've never looked on the label of those things. My wife loves vitamin water. I've never looked on the label. I'm assuming it says sugar on it, right? Yeah. It has to. It has to. But does it list certain vitamins that are in it? Yeah, it does. What's the sugar content in vitamin water? It's not that high. It's lower than the carbs. So the carbs are like 14 grams per serving. The sugar is maybe like seven. That's not that bad. Yeah. So we'll see what a judge says, but they filed a class action lawsuit. It's not that bad, but it's also seven more grams of sugar than I thought were in vitamin water. And a lot of people don't calculate that there's two and a half servings per bottle. So if you drink the whole thing, you're getting a pretty good amount. About 20 grams, you know, roughly. Yeah. A lot of people don't take that into consideration. That's a lot of sugar. Yeah, it is. Yeah, it is. They now have 3D animation of the plane crashing into the Hudson River. Yeah, they've recreated it, even with the flock of birds and everything. I wonder how they're able to do that. Nuts. I wonder how they do that. Oh, I love technology. It's really amazing, right? Oh, yeah.

1:01:07Let's see. Oh, have you guys heard about the $2 million house in Encinitas that they're going to be raffling off? Dude. What? That's crazy. This place is so beautiful. Really? Yeah, it's in Encinitas. It's five bedrooms, 4,600 square feet. Gorgeous. Saltwater pool, spa. I mean, this place is... Ooh la la. That's crazy. It is beautiful, yeah. And it's for the Ronald McDonald Charities. So basically, they're doing raffles going through... And a ticket costs $150. And they're raffling off prizes, cash, trips, a whole bunch of different things. But the grand prize in the raffle is this $2 million home in Encinitas. And so the money will go to help pay the operating costs of the new Ronald McDonald House that's being built across the street from Children's Hospital. So if you want more details on how you can get tickets and all the prizes and everything, you can go to the website. which is sdraffle.com. That's pretty awesome. Well, if I wanted to downgrade, I could go for it. Listen, it doesn't have a drawbridge. What's the point? Forget it. There's not even a moat on this sucker. I would love that. Let's see. Eddie, I made you a number 21 Arizona Cardinals jersey for next year with the name Tomlinson on the back. Where may I send you this bad boy?

1:02:36That's P1 Vodka. Eddie, did we find out anything else? Eddie's got a look on his face of utter shock right now. We find out, is there anything to talks about LT? Yeah. What is it? AJ Smith, Dean Spanos have said that they're going to discuss every player and their future on the football team. And so they said, you know, maybe in the past they have not included LT in that discussion, but this year they will. That doesn't mean they are going to trade him. That doesn't mean they are going to release him. But they are going to talk about it and see if that will help them or not. Now, I guess the big reason is LT, his salary cap number next year is going to be something like $8 million. And they say if they can release him now, then they'll save about six of that. So he'll only count about $2 million against the cap. And they're looking for money. for the future to sign Philip Rivers to an extension, Sean Merriman to an extension, Darren Sprouls to an extension, and that may be the way they go. Will he be the same LT that we know and love? Will he be that same guy that's the number one fantasy football pick and the guy that's scoring a gajillion touchdowns? Well, if you ask me right now, he's not going to be a number one pick next year, not the number one overall pick. I think Adrian Peterson, I think even Michael Turner. In a fantasy football draft. In a fantasy football draft, yeah.

1:04:00I don't know. I really don't know. I mean, I assume he will be once his injuries all heal up and things like that. But this is a 30-year-old running back, and in NFL years, that's like 80. Do I think that LT still has stuff in the tank? Yeah, I absolutely do. I think he's got at least three years left to play at a high level. He keeps himself in great shape. He's fantastic. cog to this offense, but the way he's being treated, I don't know that he even wants to come back at this point. You mean treated by the fans, or do you mean treated by the team? The team, the media, and the fans. Now, by the team, you mean making it public. Making it public that they're willing to... It's kind of weird that... We're even hearing about this. I don't want to hear about that. If you're thinking about trading LT, don't tell me until you do it. I don't want to hear about it because that's gross to me. Yeah, I mean, that doesn't seem like there's a... It's not necessary. I think the media is asking them.

1:05:01Like, hey, you know, is there anything to this? And then they didn't say anything for so long. And then the media was like, ooh, you know, all the silence is deafening over there. So then they were like, okay, well, we need to say something now. Well, remember yesterday I was saying if there was talks between LT and AJ Smith, the only people that should know about it are LT and AJ Smith. So who's talking? How is the rumor beginning? I would have never thought that there was talks to trade LT. So if those two are the only ones in the room. Who's talking? I can't see LT coming out of there and saying, hey, I just want to let everybody know what just happened in that office. Well, he has made some comments. He is disappointed that he feels like he's being treated like this. Maybe it is LT. It could be. It's just an unfortunate situation that this guy who has done nothing but... give this community everything he has and this football team everything he has that, you know, he could be just cut. Did you send your letter to the UT? Yeah. Yes. Listen to this. Eddie, I posted your open letter on chargers.com fan forum. It's received 1,745 people looking at it. It's B1 Donuts. Wow. Nice. Awesome. Yeah, I'm telling you, man, I can't believe it.

1:06:24I just, I can't believe it. Well, you know, I just don't. Okay, let's say they do release LT or trade him. Then now what? Now where do we go? You know, we're going to have to sign a running back. Oh, man. Or draft a running back, which, you know, there's no guarantee. I just don't, I don't understand it. And Darren Sproles is not. A, he's not signed. And B, he's not an every down back. And I'll say that till the day I die. What does that mean? It means he can't carry the ball as many times as LT does because he's so small. You know, yeah, he's great at what he does. He comes in. He's a change of pace guy. You know, I love his return skills. But if he carries the ball 25 times a game for 16 weeks, he's going to be dead. Let's do a little bit of this. Weekend Worry War. If you have something going on this weekend that kind of has you freaked out or nervous and you're like, I can't believe that this is going to be going on with me this weekend, call us. 570-1053. We want to talk to you. P1 Dark Zone is first. You there, Dark Zone? Yeah, I'm here, Mikey. What do you got going on? Well, today I'm going to be going in for a career day presentation.

1:08:05I've been studying the legal careers for about two months now, and I'm going to be presenting them to a set of judges. You nervous? Yeah. I'm turning into Ashley right now. I'm sweating up a storm. I feel you, bro. How many hours till you do it? Well, I'm going to be doing them. My appointment starts 15 minutes after you guys end. So about 1045? Yep. There you go. All right, brother. Good luck. All right. Thanks. There he is. P1 Bruce, you there? Yeah, hey, what's going on? What's up, Bruce? I've been seeing this woman for getting close to a year, you know, not quite. I'm divorced. I already have kids. She has been married before, but no kids. Lately, you know, we've been thinking pretty serious, and we both kind of like the idea of marriage, but the subject of kids is coming up. My last marriage, I got a vasectomy, but I haven't told her this. Okay, that's really bad. That's really bad. I haven't been leading her on either. It's not like I've been saying, oh, yeah, yeah, we're going to have kids, we're going to have kids. It's just that I've been dodging the subject. And she's brass balls. Well, hello. Okay. It's kind of the full court press is on. And you know she wants kids, do you know? Well, she hasn't come right out and said, you know, I want kids, I want them now. This is a deal breaker.

1:09:36But she's been dropping tons of hints. That means, yeah, she wants kids. Yeah, please. That means she wants kids. And she didn't know that you've had a vasectomy. No. Oh, wow. And I've wanted to tell her over the holidays, but I just chickened out. I keep putting it off. And so I've, you know, put a gun to my head and told myself I'm going to do it this week. And I'm a little nervous. So how are you going to do this? I mean, it's like if you're going to break up with somebody and take them to a nice restaurant, I figure I'm going to do the nice restaurant thing. Hopefully, if there's any hysterics, it'll be kept to a minimum. Or at least I'll have lots of witnesses if I get hurt. Wow. Wow. That is fantastic. Now, if it was an option, because isn't there like a reversal? Yeah, yeah. Which I hear is not fun. I hear it's real painful. Twice as painful. Yeah. That'll blow your balls to hell.

1:10:36I mean, let me get past this stinking weekend first, and we'll look at that later. Well, I'm just warning you, bro. Like, I'm sure if she wants kids, she's going to bring it up. Like, and you have to decide because you said you already have kids. Like, do you want more kids? And are you willing to go through that for her? Because, hey, she's going to bring it up. I mean, if she really wants kids, she's going to bring it up to you. So you better think about that. Yeah, I know. But, I mean, it's a lot. I mean, mine are 6 and 10. And kids are a lot of work, man. I mean, everybody has this wonderful idea. It's like, oh, I have a baby. And everything just floats on from there, man. Just those first, you know, couple years. I mean, just to get to the point where they can kind of be self-sufficient. You don't have to watch them, you know, every second. I think it's important. I think it's important, fellas that are listening right now that have had a vasectomy and are no longer married. Let the lady in your life know. Yeah. Let her know. Probably early, too. Early. Yeah, as soon as it starts to get even a hint of seriousness to the relationship. And, you know, the thing is, is that obviously guys, they get a vasectomy for a reason. And this guy doesn't want kids. And so I just am wondering, you know, man. I mean, I'm already 40 now.

1:11:53Yeah, but 40 is the new 30, bro. Oh, it is? So true. Yeah, it is. You're Benjamin Button, though, Sky. You're aging back. That's true. So for Sky, 30 is the new 70. Thank you. Well, I can't wait to hear what happens. And Sky's right. You better think about it. Before you get in there, are you willing to go snip snip again and get it reversed? or do you need to say, it's going to be one of two things. Either it's going to be, I'm willing to reverse it, or it's going to be, listen, I have to tell you, I don't want kids again. You have to figure it out. Yeah, dude. Oh, my crotch. You got to figure it out. Yeah. Yeah. So, all right, man. Well, listen. Call us back. We'll call you back on Monday. We're going to get your number. And we'll find out how this all went, okay? All right. All right. That is P1 Bruce. That's a doozy. Dude, I don't know how I would handle that. P1 Volcano, you there? Yeah, this is P1 Volcano. What are you going to be doing? I am actually going to be confronting a friend of mine that I've known for a while about...

1:13:14kind of a drinking problem. Really? Yeah, I mean, it's not like an intervention or anything. It's not like, I don't think she's an alcoholic, but it is a problem because she's 18. Oh, man. Okay, and you feel that, and you feel that, so you don't think that it's a problem with addiction, you think that it's a problem of age appropriate? Well, yeah. And it's actually a little bit more complicated. I kind of don't want to say too much because I think she's a B1. But maybe this will prep her for this weekend. I don't know. Anyway, I... What was that? She's in a position where she's kind of a leader to some younger kids. She's kind of what? Like a leader, like a mentor, like a figure that they look up to. Okay. And so just like, it's kind of like morally convicting for me. And I don't know, it's not like, you know, I know a lot of kids in school like drink or whatever, but it's kind of like a regular thing. Like how regular? What are we talking? We have at least, you know, most weekends as far as I know. Yeah, that's excessive. I mean, it's wrong because she's underage in general. But yeah, at that age, if you're drinking every weekend, that's really turning into something.

1:14:41So that's what I think. And so, you know, she's a really good friend of mine. I've known her for a while, and I just... How old are you? Sorry, what was that? How old are you? I'm 22. Okay. All right, man. Well, what is your relationship to her? Really good friends. I've known her for about three years now. We've been through our highs and lows and had kind of an extreme, like... like an extreme up and down, but now we're probably closer than we've ever been. All right, well, we'll check in with you Monday and see how the conversation about her drinking too much goes. Yeah, thanks so much, Mikey. All right, dude, we'll see you. It's the comedy showdown. Let's do this. Just closed his eyes and took a deep breath. I'm trying to calm the nerves and channel the energy, all right? Calm the nerves, channel the energy. Ladies and gentlemen, when we come back, Boston Rob and Boy Blunder are going to compete in a comedy showdown in front of 40 people in a studio audience. We've got a performance studio. We've got a stage, and we're ready to do this. And so don't go away. It's coming up next. The ultimate hang zone. All right. We are under attack. We can be slaves. Empires and lichens. Rise of the lichens. In theaters January 23rd. For more info, go to entertheunderworld.com.

1:16:37Hey, steak lovers. Applebee's has a delicious deal on their signature sirloin. Just $9.99 for a juicy, tender, flame-grilled steak with two sides. That's America's best-selling steak for just $9.99. It's the best meal and the best deal in the neighborhood. Hey, just want to let you know that BMW Encinitas is doing a lot of things for people right now, especially you P1s. I want to let you guys in on something extremely important. And that is that, remember when I told you, hey, you go into BMW Encinitas, they are going to give you a BMW loaner if you need a loaner. Well, I got even better news for you. They're not going to charge you for that. And at other BMW dealerships here in San Diego County, some of these places are actually charging you. And they're not even giving you a BMW, just for a loaner. So if you go into BMW Encinitas, you know that you're going to get a loaner that's a BMW, and that means a lot to people. And just also just the service is tremendous at BMW Encinitas. They are an incredible, incredible dealership. And I know their general manager personally. His name is Brian Wood, and he's a good dude. And he wants to help you out. And so check him out. It's BMW Encinitas on Encinitas Boulevard between the 5 and El Camino Real. It's AT&T and the funky outer space basis.

1:17:57Device advice, baby. Hello. Hey, Bootsy. I want a cool new phone, but my budget won't... Well, uh, AT&T's got 50% off all LG phones. And they're... Fella. I'm, uh, okay. You got the LG Insight. Yeah? A smartphone with a tippity-tapping touchscreen. The LG View with mobile TV all up in the yizzle. Up in the where? And the slippity-sliding LG shot. So they're all 50% off, huh? Yeah. It's Funkonomics, Bobble. And Bootsy's got the, uh, stimulus package. Okay. Until next time, it's Bootsy, baby. Thanks, Bootsy. I'm going to go. And AT&T, your world, deliver. Bye. The 50% off LG phone sale featuring the LG Shines is $24.99 after mail-in rebate. Pay $74.99 for phone and after mail-in rebate, receive $50 AT&T promotion card tier service agreement and data package purchase required. Certain geographic and other monthly charges and restrictions apply. See store for details.

1:18:55with a Mikey moment. You know, since I'm living away from home, I'm not really familiar with the area or the dance scene or anything like this. There's a dance scene? So, I sign up for a class. I show up to said class and it's me and a bunch of little girls. No! No! 15 years old. No! Were you better dancers than these kids or were you about the same level? Oh yeah, I kicked them. No. I wiped the map with those little hands. Out of the way for me and my breasts. You see these ladies? Maybe Sunday, baby. The show continues. Rock 105.3. Welcome back to the show. It's the Mikey Show at 721. Well, for those of you who haven't yet heard, yesterday a U.S. Airways jet crash-landed into the Hudson River. Luckily, all 155 people on board the plane survived. Padres signed former World Series MVP David Eckstein to a one-year deal that is apparently going to move him to second base. We have people in our performance studio right now getting ready for the comedy showdown, but because of the events that happened yesterday, we're kind of...

1:20:20doing things as they come to us, and we have a survivor from yesterday's plane crash in the Hudson River in New York City. This is Martin Sosa. Martin, are you there? Martin, you were on this flight, and the flight was headed to North Carolina? So you had just taken off from LaGuardia, and I'm assuming that the takeoff was as normal as ever, right? I was on board with my wife and my two children. We were the only children on board. How old are your kids? My son is nine months and my daughter is four years old. Okay, now you're talking about two adults and two kids. Were you guys sitting separated in the rows? We were actually, we didn't have assigned, our seats were not assigned contiguous to each other. So my wife was actually ahead of me. and I was with my daughter, and she had our son on her lap. Oh, my goodness. Okay, Sky has a question. Were you guys just on the Today Show this morning? Yes, we were. That's what I was about. Yeah, I just looked up, and I saw they were talking about it, and I saw with these two beautiful children, and wow, so the only children on board the flight.

1:21:40Yeah, and to see them now, it's like nothing happened. It's just remarkable. All right, so let's walk through how this happened. So the plane takes off, and from what we're hearing, it happened about three minutes into the flight. But when the flight first takes off, it must have seemed like a normal takeoff, right? It was a normal takeoff, and we ascended, you know, probably two or three feet. And we were making a turn, and then as soon as that happened, we heard a loud explosion. And at that point, someone said there was a fire in the cabin, and the cabin started filling it with smoke, and you can smell the fuel. Now, was this a real thick black smoke? No, it was just kind of a light smoke. smoke. It wasn't like a heavy smoke. It was just that you can smell the fumes and the jet fuel. What side of the aircraft, if you're looking ahead towards the cockpit door? Or the left side. And my wife is on the starboard side, which is on the right. And I guess the explosion was on the right side of the plane.

1:23:00I couldn't see any of the flames, but one of the passengers sitting next to my wife indicated to her that it didn't look good. Okay, now, so let's go through this process. You're sitting, if you're looking at the cabin, you're sitting on the left side of the aircraft and your wife is on the right, one row ahead of you? Five rows ahead of you. Okay, and now when this happens and you hear this noise and this thing, and how many, approximately, how many rows back were you? We were on the 23rd aisle on the left side, and my wife was on the 19th row on the right side. Okay, so when this explosion happens, you hear this explosion, are you immediately making eye contact with your wife? Like, what's going on here? I was trying to compose my daughter, and yeah, we were kind of looking at each other like, okay, we're going to be okay. I mean, a mild panic did set in.

1:23:55But, you know, we've traveled so much that, you know, we said, okay, well, it's under control. They can turn the plane around. You know, we can land. I'm assuming there was one engine running. But as it turns out, after the explosion, we basically heard a silence on the plane. Actually, no engines running. We were just gliding. And so you don't hear anything. There's nothing, and there was no communication from the pilot, so we're just basically, okay, so we assumed he was going to turn it around and get us back to LaGuardia, but as we're descending rapidly, I just realized that we're not anywhere near. Manhattan is to my left as I'm looking out the window, and I'm like, well, this isn't going to, this is not going well. Are you in an aisle seat, or are you in a window seat? and my daughter was on their window. And your daughter's four, right? Yes. And is she looking out the window? Yeah, we're like, you know, Daddy, look at the water, and it was just surreal. I mean, so, you know, with that said, just before impact, the pilot announces, brace yourself for impact. And I guess some of the crew members yelled to duck and cover, and that's exactly what we did. And then we had a turbulent landing. Now, wait, wait, wait. Let's go back just a little bit.

1:25:18With your wife holding your son, where was she in the aircraft in terms of seating? Was she aisle, window, middle? She was 19 in the center, and fortunately for her, the passenger next to her was a young man, father of five, who basically embraced her son for her. She obviously wasn't... As strong as he was. So he held Damien during the point of impact. Really? So she handed your son to the passenger to her right or to her left? To her left. To her left. Okay, so he's on the aisle. Yeah, we want to meet him and thank him gracefully for what he did. But, you know, it was so chaotic. Well, so do go on. So, okay, so anyway, she hands your child to him, and he's holding on to the baby. At any time, did the flight attendants come on and say anything over the loudspeaker? There was no communication. That's unbelievable. So from the point of impact, or from the point of the noise of the explosion in the engine to the point of impact, you never heard from the pilot nor the...

1:26:39What was the sound of his voice when he said that? It was amazing. It was just so composed. It's unreal. Very composed. He comes on over there, and does he say, this is your pilot speaking, or does he just say... He was a pilot. He just said, no, brace for impact, and that was it. What do you remember about the point of impact? I mean, like, you know, being in an elevator and just, you know, landing on a hard surface. I mean, it was just, you know, the plane spun around. You could feel, you know, the G-force kind of spinning around. But we held tight. I mean, you know, everyone was super surreal because everyone was so composed. I mean, there was no panic. So, you know, after the point of impact, you know, it was, we're like, okay, my first reaction was, okay, we survived the impact.

1:27:39But the water was coming in so quickly that I thought we were just going to drown. Was the water coming in through the actual all of the windows? It's hard to say because it was kind of coming up from the floor. So it was hard. It wasn't rushing in from the window. And what are you seeing as you're looking out of the 23rd row window where your daughter is sitting? What are you seeing? Basically up at maybe a 30 degree angle, you know, towards the cockpit. So we had to manage our way to the two-side exit. But as you're sitting in your seat, before you get up and you start making your way anywhere, do you look out the windows into the water? Yeah, we couldn't look out. The plane was submerged, so we were almost eye-level with the water, the windows were anyway. So as you look out the window, you're eye-level with it, you see the surface of the water. Yes. And at that point, who do you hear first, pilot or airline attendant? I mean, it was just a pandemonium just trying to get out. I mean, it was controlled chaos because, you know, I was holding my daughter. I was trying to get to my wife because she was, you know, she was, you know, I mean, we were all in shock. And she was basically waiting for me to get to the side exit. Do you all exit on one side?

1:29:09We wanted to stay together, so we both exited on the right side of the plane. And I'm still looking for flight attendants. I mean, are flight attendants... I mean, it was hard to say because you couldn't tell a civilian from the flight attendant. Got it, got it. How quickly were those doors opened? Well, to be honest, it seemed like forever. We were closer to the back, and they were actually sealing off the back door. Oh, gosh. And from what I understand, they needed to, that it would have been a bad idea to open. I was like, why did they do that? Because we learned later that if they had opened it, the water would have just allowed the plane to sink. Okay, so when you get out through that exit, are you getting out and walking onto the wing of the aircraft? Three or four feet below the surface. But there was a, one of the life rafts was directly, you know, behind the wing. And we, you know, we tried, we basically got, my wife got onto the raft with my two children with the help of some of the passengers. And I was basically in the water for like 20 minutes, you know, up to my chest. Wow. You were in the water for 20 minutes up to your chest and you can see your wife in the lifeboat, right?

1:30:35They were safe and, you know, at least, you know, out of harm's way because there seemed no danger that the plane would explode at that point. But, you know, you could see, you know, the jet fuel was basically underwater and it was a mess. We're talking to Martin Sosa. He was in the plane crash that happened yesterday in New York City. And at what point were you the most, through this entire thing, at what point were you the most frightened? It's hard to say. It all happened so quickly, but I think it's, I guess, between the time of impact, right before impact, and then from the plane. And we were going to be okay. Did you go through any kind of prayer, Martin? To be honest, it was a life or death situation, so I just, all I kept thinking about were my two kids and my wife and how we were going to survive this.

1:31:34I mean, you just go into automatic palate. It was just, it was very surreal. I mean, I don't think anything in life prepares you for something like this. Was the water painful to be in? The water was about 32 degrees. I mean, my hands are still numb. My hands were all blue and my legs were, you know, very heavy. It was just a harrowing ordeal. Martin, thank you for spending time with us. We appreciate you coming on the air with us. Best of luck to you and your family. I'm glad you guys are safe. What you experienced was just an amazing experience that you're going to carry with you the rest of your life. We appreciate you coming on, Martin. Thank you. We'll see you. That's Martin Sosa. He is a survivor of Flight 1549. It's the flight that went down yesterday in the Hudson River. And all people aboard, all 155, safe. Unreal. Awesome. When we come back, we're going to be doing the comedy showdown, ladies and gentlemen. Don't go away. I don't need anything else in this world. Family this.

1:33:14This is the Mikey Show. Attention, taxpayers. The IRS is currently accepting reduced settlements from people who owe back taxes. If you owe over $10,000 in delinquent taxes to the state or IRS, you are eligible to settle that debt for pennies on the dollar. For a free phone consultation, call Tax Relief USA at 1-800-700-2840. Millions of taxpayers are eligible to settle their tax liabilities for a fraction of what they owe, but few are aware of this opportunity, leaving them at risk for wage garnishment, bank levies, and property seizure. Tax Relief USA specializes in tax... If you owe $10,000 or more in state or federal taxes, you could save thousands of dollars. Call Tax Relief USA today for your free phone consultation. 1-800-700-2840

1:34:101-800-700-2840. That's 1-800-700-2840. Get the personal service, low loan rates, and high dividends you deserve. Open an account with San Diego's best credit union, San Diego County Credit Union. Ask about the My Checking Account, free with these statements. San Diego County Credit Union, growing together. I'd classify it as minor now. It's a minor annoyance. Yeah. K-O-C. San Diego's rocker. Hi, we're the Miller family. I'm Jenny, and this is my husband, Paul. We all talk a lot. But our chatterbox daughter. Duh, I'm a teenager. So we switched to Verizon Wireless. So I can call more of my friends without using any minutes. And I can open our wireless bill without my head exploding. Now your family can get unlimited talk with over 80 million Verizon Wireless customers. That's more than with any other national carrier. It's the largest mobile-to-mobile calling family in America. Call more people. Use zero minutes.

1:35:15Explode no heads. Switch to Verizon Wireless and talk all you want to over 80 million people. And you can still add a line anytime for just $9.99 monthly access per line after the first two lines for $69.99 monthly access with new two-year agreement. Visit any Verizon Wireless store, Circuit City, VerizonWireless.com, or call 1-800 to join in. Activation, early termination, and other fees apply. Coverage details at VerizonWireless.com. Enormous or of epic proportions. Thousands of guitars. We'll be right back.

1:36:14Former UFC middleweight champ Rich Ace Franklin takes on former pride welterweight and middleweight champ Dan Henderson. Plus, Mauricio Shogun Hua looks to avenge his loss to UFC Hall of Famer Mark the Hammer Coleman. The Ultimate Fighting Championship presents UFC 93, Franklin vs. Henderson from the O2 Arena in Dublin, Ireland. This Saturday, only on Pay-Per-View. Visit 93.ufc.com for details. Cards subject to change. Now, there's some crazy people trying to take over the mall. The only man for the job is Blart. He is a pro. Blart. Blart. We're not Blart and Jelly. What's up, man? Kevin James is. Safety never takes a holiday. Paul Blart's Mall Cop. Now playing. At Palomar College, you can improve your job skills or start a degree program. Log on to palomar.edu for information on hundreds of day, evening, and online classes. Spring semester begins January 20th. Learn more at palomar.edu.

1:37:13Rock 105.3 Traffic. Brought to you by Sleep Train Mattress Centers. Well, the ride isn't too bad overall here this morning. We're getting by with a fairly light commute, though. We are picking up a few more brake lights in some spots here. South 15 isn't too bad. You've got that slowdown from the 78 down to Felicita pretty much when you're back up the speed there. This coaster ride, though, is starting to see some more brake lights developing down the North County shoreline. WKD is slow into Solana Beach. Westbound 52, good to go. Your westbound 8 ride a little bit tight here as you come in. From Spring Street out towards Lake Murray. And then from there, a nice-looking ride into Mission Valley. The King Freeway 94 is looking great westbound. No major problems there. Coming up onto the South Bay, you've got a little bit of traffic on both the 5 and the 805 northbound. Pretty much in the usual spot here. Coming up toward the South Bay Freeway up into National City. As 805 continues to go up to Market Street, up to the 94, rather. Now you're going to find a busier ride over the valley, out around Murray Ridge. And then another struggle from Kearney Mesa heading up over that 52. I'm Rick Lawrence on Rock 405. P-1 Allen? Yes. You went into sleep train in San Marcos. I sure did, Mikey. Went in there, was going to get the queen, told them I was the P-1. They upgraded us to the California king and took $1,200 off the price. Yeah, it was nice. And they gave us the pillows, mattress cover, sheets, everything for free, free delivery, all that, just because I said I was the P-1. There are certain things in my life that I considered no-brainers.

1:38:40At the time that I married my wife, I knew that one was a no-brainer. Nobody's going to put up with the stuff she puts up with and is still real cool about it like her. But there's also things like when I talk about AIS and when I talk about Sleep Train, these are no-brainers in life. If you're doing anything other than Sleep Train or AIS, it's not the best decision you could be making. Sleep Train is the best decision. You can be making if you need a mattress. If you've been thinking about... It's an awesome mattress, too. The Beautyrest Plush Paris. I mean, it's gorgeous. That's nice, dude. That's nice. Sleep Train in San Marcos. Sleep Train is your ticket to a better night's sleep. Thanks, dude. You're listening to The Very Hilarious Mikey Show. Featuring Mikey. I don't run anywhere. I saunter. Eddie. I'm clearly the best. Sky. I never, ever spend money. Sean. I am. Very susceptible to supernatural phenomenon. Boston Rob. I'm so athletic, man. And Ashley. I do have a lot of best friends, yeah. On Rock 105.3. Welcome back, everybody. Let's hear it from our live studio audience. I love it. I love it. It is...

1:40:04741. March 29th has been announced as the release date for Guitar Hero Metallica. There it is. Jim Hazlitt has been eliminated as a consideration for head coach for the St. Louis Rams. They've now narrowed it down to four other guys. Ladies and gentlemen, we are in our performance studio right now, and we have a packed house. It's standing room only. Two drink minimum, everybody. Two drink minimum. There you go. And, hey, don't forget, this could be the first ever comedy showdown. Who knows? Maybe it goes good. And we decided to keep doing it. Ashley versus Skye. Do this. No, thank you. That's not my cup of tea. I'm ready. Well, here's the idea. Here's the idea, you know. Boy Blunder, who used to work on our show, and Boston Rob are both guys that are interested in stand-up comedy and being stand-up comedians. And so thank you. No, that's not a joke. You're killing Mike. That's right. Thank you. Thank you very much. Oh, well, thanks. And so basically what we decided to do is we decided to let them go up against each other in stand-up comedy.

1:41:18And so that's what they're going to be doing here today. And so I don't know, man. I'm very nervous because of a couple of things. One, Rob's nervousness makes me nervous. Thank you. He's fine, you guys. No, he's freaking out. No, you guys, he's fine. It's like the people in Titanic. Oh, is that kind of fine? Yeah, he's got blue lips fine. He's horrible. He's excited. And then Boy Blunder is worrying me because his voice is all messed up. And he's like, he's got like sick voice or something. That's weird. He's getting over it. Well, I think he's going through puberty. Is that the deal? Yeah. It is. How can he be going through puberty if he has a full beard? Late bloomer. Late bloomer. I mean, he has mutton chops. I don't know. Well, it's not a real beard anyway. It's a gravy beard. That's true. It's true. Yeah, that makes sense. Well, are you guys ready to see some comedy? Yeah, let's do this. All right, well, here's what we're going to do.

1:42:18There is no coin flip required to see who's going to go first because Boy Blunder has graciously volunteered to go first. Strategy. That's right. What you're going to hear is you're going to hear approximately five to ten minutes of material from each one of these guys. And then we're going to go by studio audience response at the very end to determine who the winner is. And so we'll wait to the very end to do that. But we do. have a MC today, and it's Mal. Look at this. Look at this. Dude, we are looking at what do you guys? What do you think of the backdrop that they put here? Fantastic. Welcome to Yuck Yucks. Yeah. I mean, the masons were working all night to build that brick wall. It was amazing. It's fantastic. We got a brick wall. We got the you know, we even have like the drapes and the whole thing. So funny. And so, you know, Mal is a guy that we love. That's a stand up comic that I've said before. I think.

1:43:20This guy is going to be famous. Oh. And he's very good, and he does shows right here in San Diego. Before you get up there, Mal, let me ask you, do you have any shows coming up? Yeah, next week I have, like, a full slate of shows. If you go to malhall.com, I have all the dates up there. She said you forgot your own name. No, I didn't. Okay. Good answer. All right, so if people want to know more, malhall.com. Mailhall.com, especially ladies, if you want to come. All right. That's not what it's for. All right. Malspace. Malspace. All right. So without any further ado, we're going to get to hear. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Before you start, I'm sorry. I just want to remind everyone that if you want to watch it, you can go online to MikeyShow.com and you can watch the whole thing online. I'm watching it right now. Oh, right now? Oh, I didn't know that we were live streaming. We're streaming, bro. Okay, so we're live streaming MikeyShow.com if you want to actually watch these performances. There you guys are. Hey, how are you? How do I look? Everybody online.

1:44:29Blocking my shot. All right. So without any further, here's how we're going to do it. We're going to have Mal get up. He's going to do a little opening and do an emcee for us. And I want to say thank you to Mal for doing that. And then Boy Blunder is going to get up and perform. We will then take a break. This is awesome. We'll then take a break. We'll come back. And Boston Rob will do a set. And then we're going to ask the audience who wins. It's going to be that easy. So let's get this thing going. Ladies and gentlemen, make a big round of applause for Mal Hall. Yeah! Awesome. Awesome. Are we on? Is this on, Kevin? I can't hear myself in the room. Does it matter? Okay, good. Everyone else could hear me. Yeah. Good. How's everybody doing this morning? Good. Sweet. Stand-up comedy is all about who you have to follow, and today I get to follow a survivor from a plane crash. Awesome. Top that, funny man. This is ridiculous. Now we're going to have a survivor from the plane crash that the whole world knows about. Yeah, go ahead and follow that. Tell us some jokes. Driving. Driving in San Diego. I figured out that people in Southern California aren't afraid of rain while driving. Everyone freaks out when it rains. I thought it was just the rain. No. We're afraid of water on our windshield, period. I was stuck in a car pileup.

1:46:14Yesterday on the 163, and I was sitting there for like an hour, and I was like, there better be dead bodies on this freeway. Because I'm hungry, and I'm driving to food right now. I got up to where, you know, everyone starts speeding up again. And the reason why everyone was slowing down is because the sprinkler was shooting onto the freeway. God, there's water on my windshield. What do I do? Everyone drove like an Asian from that point to downtown. I'm half Asian, so if there's Asians listening, do not get upset. Driving, it's crazy. Do you ever have this happen? Do you ever have a situation where you get too polite while driving? This happened to me. Yesterday, I pulled up to a four-way stop at the same time as three other cars, and we all freaked out. Everyone got polite. We didn't know what to do. Who goes first? So I did the polite thing. Guy to my left. Go ahead. No? All right. Guy to the right. Go ahead. No?

1:47:30Come on, dude. No? Me? No. I'm not going. So we all just sat there and looked at each other. And what happens next? Everyone moves at the same time. Oh, my God. And he started all over. So what happened is we all got to the middle of the intersection, bumping cars. We didn't know what to do, so we all got out and had a dance battle in the middle of the intersection. I did the robot and got the hell out of there. That's what I did. American Idol's on. You guys watch that? Yeah. A couple of people. Did you guys see Ryan Seacrest try to high-five the blind guy? Really? First of all, the blind guy made it to Hollywood, which is bad news for everyone else on the show because he's going to win. There's no way you're not going to vote for a blind guy, right? Like, oh, my God, he's blind. Just let him go. It's reality TV. Everyone wants an edge, right? Stevie Wonder, did you guys hear that he's contemplating going on Dancing with the Stars? He's blind. Seeing is a big part of dancing, dude.

1:48:47If he makes it on the show, he's winning. When he falls, you're telling me you're not going to vote for him? That's cheating, right? The only game that I'd watch Stevie Wonder play, and I know he wouldn't cheat, is Marco Polo. Marco Polo with the stars. And Stevie could have his eyes open and he'd know he's not cheating. Marco! It's messed up. I'm single, ladies. I'm half black and half Asian. Like I mentioned earlier, I got this voice, which is messed up. I don't sound like a black guy. This lady came up to me after she heard me on the Mikey show the last time. And she was like, you don't look anything like what you sound like. And she's like, on the radio, you sound like a short Jewish guy. I'm a tall half Asian black guy, which is messed up. I got this voice. My black friends are always accusing me of acting white.

1:50:19Like I auditioned for this voice and I got it. Voice now. Sailor Express. Let's go. It's ridiculous. Acting white. I don't even know what that means. Apparently acting white is me with a clean criminal record. Speaking in complete sentences featuring real words at my job. Acting white about 40 hours a week with benefits right now. Past weekend I found out the... The blackest thing I do is drink Heineken, which makes no sense. And apparently I make people nervous at the ATM machine, which is messed up. This guy freaked out on me. I was like, dude, calm down. I'm just trying to enjoy my Saturday and get your PIN number. What are you freaking out about? Hand it over. I'll wrap it up so these guys can get up here. This is a fun audience. Mailhall.com, if you like the jokes so far, come to a show.

1:51:39I'm going to wrap up with this. I'm from San Diego. I've been doing a lot of stand-up in Hollywood, though. Happy to let everyone in my hometown know I got an agent. Thank you. She's working hard. She got me my first movie role. I'm going to be in a movie summer of 010. Wait. It will be 010. 2-0-1-0. That's 010. Summer of 010, I'm going to be in Rush Hour 4. Yeah. Thank you. I'm going to play both of them. It's going to be awesome. Come to the movie. That's my time. You guys ready for this competition? So you guys are really going to enjoy this first guy. He performs at clubs and colleges all over Southern California. Make it really loud for Boy Blender, everybody. Wow, look at all these guys. I did not see this coming. First of all, let's make sure we get this mic stand ready for B-Rob next time here. He's lowering the stand. It's not cooperating. That's okay. We'll get you a different model, Rob. That's cool.

1:53:00Thank you guys so much for showing up here today. This is like a dream come true for me, really. Thank you guys to the Mikey Show, Mikey, Eddie Sky, Ashley, B-Rob, of course, and Dr. Zethian. Oh, it's back there running the board. He's a good man. You should subscribe to his newsletter. I am Boy Blunder. For those that don't know me, I am the afternoon show producer here at Rock 153. And yeah, I've got a little tickle in my throat. I apologize. I did think making out with toilets was a good idea. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem like it. I'm impressed. I'm very impressed by the audience here because, honestly, the only time I get up before 6.30 in the morning now is when Hometown Buffet is throwing their... I haven't even gotten to the joke yet. You're already laughing. I guess we can... Well, check that one off as a success then. All right. All right, cool. No, no, it's good. It's 2009. Feels good, right? Brand new year. We got a president coming in on Tuesday. It feels pretty cool. Yes. I like it. I myself, I've been working out, doing a little, you know, power walking or whatever it is that you do on the elliptical. I don't know. I don't get much experience at the gym. But I'll tell you, the biggest motivator for a fat guy when he's working out is that moment in the shower when you look down and you see your boy for the first time in like 10 years or so. It's motivation, I'm telling you. You get down. It is. You'll be like, wow, oh, I have not seen you since, what, Clinton? That's cool. Okay.

1:54:33Right on. But, oh, it's six more weeks of winter, but that's okay. I do like living. It is 2009. I love living in this time period because we've done things as a species that is just incredible when you really think about it. We've sent men to the moon. We've gone to Mars. We found water there. We've reached into the most depths of the universe and seen images that would make poets cry. The only thing I can't understand is why can't we make a mustard that you don't have to shake out that little mustard pea every time you want to make a sandwich? It's annoying, isn't it? That's where we're at right now with technology. We have, like, a lot of great stuff, a lot of cool stuff, like HDTV and downloadable movies. That's cool. It's nice. But, you know, we were promised some cool stuff as kids, like flying cars and hoverboards and vacation trips to the moon and stuff like that. Instead, we'd get, like, iPods and MySpace and terabytes of porn on the Internet, freely downloadable, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

1:55:38Actually, I think we did get the better end of that bargain. Take that back. I'm single as well. Mal, I joined the club here. It's tough being a single guy in San Diego, especially when you're a single guy like me, because I am just completely inept when I'm hitting on a woman. It's like watching a fat girl buy rice cakes when she wants to lose weight. You just know it's probably not going to end well, you know? It's a military town here. Women love their guys in uniform here. They do. They love them. And I can't say that I blame them. You know, I once tried to get on the action. I wore my Boy Scout uniform down to PB one night. It was nice. It was very sexy. I had the kerchief and everything. Little hat. My badges. Show them off real nice. Didn't work out the way I wanted it to. An older gentleman slipped me his number, which was really comforting, actually, when I think about it now. But, you know, that's probably a whole other thing. I will be honest, though, you know, as long as somebody's getting laid in this town, it might as well be the guys that are out there, you know, laying it on the line. Heroes, true heroes every single day here. And, you know, they're responsible and nice. Usually have a good head of hair, muscular, defined. If you're into that sort of thing, I guess, whatever. But ladies, let me tell you something. If you're into something different, if you want something a la carte, if you will, how about maybe, let me introduce you to what I like to call a night out.

1:57:09Whip blender. TM. We set the scene for you here, okay? Beautiful Saturday night here in San Diego. The stars are shimmering brightly out there. The moon's rising. It's gorgeous out, right? Nine o'clock, I pull up to your front door. Good hour and a half, actually, after I was supposed to be there. Anticipation builds. You know, it's a good thing. I'll escort you to the Noble Chariot for the evening. My beaten up Toyota truck. Don't even worry about the hole in the flow board. It's got plenty of Big Mac containers between you and the road. Hardly anybody falls through there anymore. It's good. Of course, we'll be going to one of San Diego's more finer eating establishments here. Outback, if I think you'll put out. And Olive Garden, if I think you won't. I'll let you even order whatever you want off the entree menu. Just that kind of guy. And maybe even an appetizer. Throw that in there. I'll keep most of that on my side of the table, if you don't mind. Just a saying. After dinner, of course, we'll take a nice little romantic stroll through the mall where I'll comment on various dresses or stuff I think you look good in. If you probably lost 10 or 20 pounds, you know. Gotta set goals for you. Absolutely. Gotta set goals. Again, okay. So no Blender date, no magical evening with Blender would be complete, TM, without a trip to Victoria's Secret, where I'm just going to try and buy you a memento of our first date tonight.

1:58:38Usually that ends with them throwing the panties back in my face, but, you know, whatever. Prude. Usually after that, they'll insist that I take them home, which I gladly oblige because we all know where the night was headed, don't we, ladies? Of course. Obviously, yeah. I'll insist on taking them to the front door like a gentleman should. Well, you'll tell me that it's probably a good idea that we'll just be friends and we should cool things down. But I'll nod and... I'll tell you that my definition of friendship includes the option to shellac you inside and out with Blender DNA. I said optional, Eddie. Don't worry about it. It's okay. Anyway, thank you very much, guys. That is my time. I appreciate it. Thank you. Wow. Blender working a little bluer than we remember. Hey there. You know, he's definitely, he's grown a lot since being on the Mikey show. And definitely. That's just his size. What? Now let's do this. Let's do this. Guys, what did you think of Boy Blunder? Did you like that? Thank you. Pretty good stuff. Now, we're going to take a quick time out. When we come back, we're going to have Boston Rob get up on stage. Now, I got to tell you, Boy Blunder, he's done this a couple of times. He's done some open mic nights at professional comedy clubs here in San Diego. And so when Boston Rob comes up, it's actually going to be his first time in front of an audience. Oh, my God. I can't believe that.

2:00:13First time in front of an audience. Is there a barf bag anywhere around here? I'm telling you, man. So we will come back from our break, and we will have Mal get up, and he'll introduce Boston Rob. Don't go anywhere. Make noise here in the studio. It's the Mikey Show Comedy Showdown. It's Rock 105.3. Hi, this is Magic Johnson. My second year in the NBA, I blew out my knee. I thought the season was lost, but my teammates picked me up. They battled hard and made the playoffs. And I realized I didn't have to do it all myself. Sooner or later, we all need help. If you need funds quickly, Jackson Hewitt has the Money Now loan. A Money Now loan is money like magic. It's the fastest way to get money at tax time. And applying for a Money Now loan is simple. Call today, 1-800-234-1040. Or visit jacksonhewitt.com. Jackson Hewitt, a partner.

2:01:23and a path. Attention taxpayers, the IRS is currently accepting reduced settlements from people who owe back taxes. If you owe over $10,000 in delinquent taxes to the state or IRS, you are eligible. Transcription by CastingWords

2:02:23in resolving your debt. For your free consultation, call 1-800-700-2840. If you owe $10,000 or more in state or federal taxes, you could save thousands of dollars. Call Tax Relief USA today for your free phone consultation. 1-800-700-2840. 1-800-700-2840. That's 1-800-700-2840. Check engine. So many things can go wrong with your car. That's why Pep Boys invented one place that can make them all right. Check tires. Pep Boys announces the 1-2-3 tire sale. Buy one tire starting at the incredible low price of $19.99. That's $19.99. Buy any two installed tires and get a free oil change. Or buy any three installed tires, get a free oil change, and get the fourth tire free. After mail and rebate, both offers exclude Cornell. Now through Sunday at Pep Boys.

2:03:23Buy three, get the fourth tire free, plus a free oil change. Pep Boys, the people who brought you buy three, get the fourth tire free, are now bringing you free oil changes as well. Call 1-800-PEP-BOYS or pepboys.com. Connect Tech Support Plus from AT&T makes anyone an instant technical genius. Why won't you print? Connect Tech Support Plus. Instant genius. Hey, who's the man now, printer? I am, thank you. Call the U.S.-based experts at Connect Tech seven days a week. For problems too big for the phone, they'll even make house calls. Oh, this stupid program is acting up again. Connect Tech Support Plus. Hi. Instant genius. Is it hot in here or is it my unfrozen computer? Connect Tech tackles the toughest tech questions over the phone. Dude, where's that song I just downloaded? Connect Tech Support Plus. Instant genius. Yeah. Oh, there it is. Let's celebrate with a little air guitar.

2:04:27Connect Tech Support Plus from AT&T. Technology support for you and your home. Call 1-800-344-1734 or go to att.com slash connect tech. Residential customers only not available in all areas. Hardware and software limitations apply. Terms and conditions apply. See att.com slash connect tech for terms and conditions. Thank you very much. Hey, Sarah, I didn't expect to see the busiest person I know at the company picnic. Well, of course. And what's one more thing between the job, the kids, and college? College? Yeah, college. When it comes to my future, I know the way to turn a job into a career is to complete my degree. And you're doing this when? In between being the family chauffeur and putting in a full day at the office? Well, I chose Chapman University College. Chapman's a perfect fit. Convenient class times, a campus here in San Diego, and exceptional faculty. Plus, I can take classes online if I choose. Wow. Yeah, I feel pretty smart. Make a smart move for your future. Chapman University College offers bachelor's, master's, credential, and certificate programs with classes starting January 19th and March 30th. Call 866-CHAPMAN today to schedule an appointment with an advisor at our San Diego campus.

2:05:36For more information, visit chapman.edu slash sdnow or call 866-CHAPMAN and ask about our online degrees. Former UFC middleweight champ Rich Ace Franklin takes on former pride welterweight and middleweight champ Dan Henderson. Plus, Mauricio Shogun Hua looks to avenge his loss to UFC Hall of Famer Mark the Hammer Coleman. The Ultimate Fighting Championship presents UFC 93, Franklin vs. Henderson from the O2 Arena in Dublin, Ireland. Saturday, only on pay-per-view. Visit 93.ufc.com for details. Cards subject to change. AutoZone. Are you overdue for an oil change? If so, don't put your car's engine at risk. Get in the zone. Now at AutoZone, get five quarts of Pennzoil conventional motor oil and a Fram Extra Guard oil filter for just $16.99. That's right, $16.99. Some restrictions apply. See store for details. Don't wait until it's too late. Maximize your engine's life and performance. Get to AutoZone. Do it yourself and save. Get in the zone. B1 Adam. Yes, Mikey. Yeah, what's up, dude? Hey, I just want to call you and tell you that actually, like, I listen to you guys, like, all the time. And I called AIS because I needed new insurance. And they seriously saved me, like, $200 a month. I'm glad to hear that, dude. I know. And I told him that. I heard it from you. And they're like, yeah, he gets us a lot of business. Hey, dude, guess what I found out?

2:07:03What's up? About AIS. What's that? When you renew your policy, they check it all again, and we're getting another break on the price. Because they don't just renew you. They check it all again and see if anything better has come up since the time you first signed up. Oh, sweet. Yeah, so when you renew, you'll probably save again. All right. So, I mean, listen, they're the auto insurance specialists. If you're not with AIS, I don't, I mean, I'm being so serious when I tell you. How much you save, Adam? 200 bucks a month. Nice. Here's the phone number, 1-800-777-4AIS. Thank you, Adam. Thank you. By the way, I want to give you the AIS website. It's AISinsurance.com. and maximum destruction. Plus, kids and Super Bowl seats are still just 10 bucks. At Ticketmaster, the box office, or San Diego House of Motorcycles, Suzuki. Tickets subject to convenience that have kids, $10 seats, foods, extreme seats, all seats, $2 more day in show. Monster Chat! The Mikey Show's on. Featuring Mikey. I'm 36 years old. I have a sensitivity to sugar. Eddie. I'm dumb. I can't be a doctor. You are a doctor. Sky. Just because I like to be sensitive of other people's feelings. But it doesn't do any good. Sean. I'm...

2:08:36Very fair when it comes to tipping. Boston Rob. Everybody enjoys a good thumbs up once in a while. That's right. And Ashley. I'm really bad at describing things. On Rock 105.3. Make some noise here for the comedy showdown. Welcome back to our performance studio where we got the comedy showdown going on. It's 8-10. A group has filed a lawsuit against the Coca-Cola company claiming that they used deceptive claims to sell their vitamin water. USD is 3-0 in league play. They beat Pepperdine yesterday. Hey, I want to let everybody know that if you want to watch what we're doing right now, you can go to MikeyShow.com and you're going to see everything that's happening as it's happening. Hats off to our promotions department again for making the most incredible looking stage here. It looks like a comedy club, man. Flawless. Yeah, it's got the brick wall in the background. You got the drapes. You got the whole stage set up here. And what we're doing is we're doing a comedy showdown between Boy Blunder and Boston Rob.

2:09:40And graciously, Mal Hall is here, and he's emceeing for us. And before we get back to the show, to the showdown, because Boston Rob's up next. What? Boehner did pretty good. Dude, he did. Boehner did good. I'm surprised. Boehner did pretty good. Yeah. But before we do that, on the phone with us right now, ladies and gentlemen, make some noise for Mr. Craig Gass. Professional comedian. That's right. Craig, how you doing, man? I'm doing great, man. So how's the competition going so far? It's going good, dude. We had Boy Blunder get up there, and he rocked the house. He brought it, and people here in the studio audience really dug it. Can I sit on hold and listen to Rob do his thing? You absolutely can. Now, I hear Craig gave Rob a little talking to yesterday, a little advice, a little pep talk. Well, for those of you that don't know, Craig Gass is a professional comedian that has been on various TV and movies and all kinds of stuff. And Craig's also a really good friend. And so what did you tell him, Craig? Well, he ran some stuff by me, and I was like, you know, it's kind of tough sometimes when you're talking to somebody and they're running material by you and you go,

2:10:56No, I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't do that. So did he basically run everything by you and you go, yeah, I'd scrap that stuff right from the beginning and then the end. The whole thing. Just flip all that out and then just, you know what, just start again, buddy. Oh, no. You know, that happens in every level of entertainment. You know, when you're working on a radio show and you're creating something, your gut says, I don't think that'll work. And I can always hear an audience reaction in my head. You know, I guess most comedians normally don't try out their material on anyone. They just know. They instinctively know, like, oh, this is going to be great. And you know before you even get on stage what's going to work and what doesn't work. And sometimes if it doesn't work exactly the way you wanted it to, you've got to kind of tweak it out a little bit, maybe explain yourself more.

2:11:55Just didn't take it personally. He was like, all right, cool. I'll scratch that. I'll scratch that. How about this? How about this? And it was about a 50-50. It was like half of it was like, oh, I like that. And half of it was like, I wouldn't do that. And so I'm curious to hear what the end result is going to be. Hey, Craig, talk to everybody listening about what it feels like to do what Rob's about to do, which is go on stage for the very first time in his life. Well, I can tell you for me. It is what defined my entire life because, I hate to say it, but it was the most awful experience I've ever had. No, don't see that. Not right now. Wow, dude. Wow. I have seen hundreds of people do so much better than I did. The reason why it defined my life is because I didn't realize what it felt like to stand in front of people who are just... staring at you, waiting for you to say something funny. And it feels, it is the most intense pressure. Plus, I didn't realize how loud the microphone was. I didn't realize how bright the lights were on stage. I lasted about 20 seconds at a comedy club in Tucson, Arizona called Laugh. And I said, you know, I can't do this. Wow. I walked off stage. I made one comment about how scared I was, and then I walked off stage.

2:13:20Well, go ahead. My hands were shaking so bad that I couldn't even get the mic to go back in the mic stand. Oh, wow. Oh, no. That's all great. Craig, at that point, at that point, did you have all the different voices in your arsenal? Well, I refused to do voices on stage to do impressions on stage for a long time because other comedians would say, oh, you know, guys who do impressions just get away with a cheap laugh. I always stayed away from doing voices on stage. I would just... And by the way, I did not return to the stage for three years. Oh, wow. Three years? Rob's not hearing this, is he? I hope not. He's right back there. What happened is, I did it for fun. I was just doing it for fun. And it wasn't just a bad experience of not being able to survive the pressure of being on stage. But when I sat down in the crowd... Every comedian that came on stage, and keep in mind, I was with 30 friends at the comedy club. Every comedian that went on stage ripped me apart and said I was a loser. Wow. Dude. Well, you kind of deserved it. Hey, Craig.

2:14:31Hey, I kind of get the feeling the person who's laughing is Eddie. Am I right? Yeah, well, we all are. You've got about 45 people laughing here. All right, all right, all right. Hey, Craig, you know, speaking of comedians, what about somebody like Tom Arnold? Do you think that he would have any words of advice for Rob? That's actually the weird thing is Tom's here. Oh, really? Get out. I cannot believe that. Oh, my gosh. Can we talk to him? Yeah, let me put him on the phone. Hold on. Hey, buddy. What's going on there? Hey, Tom. How are you, man? I'm feeling great. And, you know, I tried to get a hold of Rob, and I think he changed his phone number. I'm not sure. Oh, no. Uh-oh. My advice to Rob is just try out. Personally, I'm an AA. I'm an alcoholic. No, no, no, no, Tom. I'm not supposed to say that. Yeah, it's the second part of it. I'll try out my material at the meetings. That's really weird, Tom Arnold. Bad place to do that, probably, Tom. Bad place to do that. Tom, I heard that cocaine helps. No, wait, Eddie. That's a bad idea. Bad idea. Believe it or not, alcohol helps you to get over your nervousness and marijuana and heroin. Okay, bad idea. Thank you. That's Tom Arnold. There you go, Rob.

2:15:48That's just my advice. I'm going to put Craig back on the phone. All right. Thank you, Tom. Hey, there's a guy here who actually wanted to say, I don't know if this is going to be considered cheating, but there's a comic in here who said that he has a great thing that you can fall back on. Do you guys want to talk to Tracy Morgan? Yeah, can we please? That'd be great. Yeah, hold on. Hey, Mikey. What's going on? Hey, it's Tracy. Tracy, what are you doing? What's going on, white people? It's Tracy. Hi. Hey, Tracy, you got any advice for Rob? He's about to get on stage for the first time. Yes, I do. When you're on stage, always do mama jokes. Mama jokes. Okay, mama jokes. We'll make sure that he knows that. Just go around the room and back to the room with mama jokes. Just go, hey, Sky, your mama is so fat. When she stands on the corner, the cops yell, break it up. That's not very nice, Tracy. That's kind of mean, Tracy. Well, Tracy. And then you go around the room, you go, Ashley, your mama's so fat, when she bungee jumps, she drops straight into the pits of hell. Oh, no. That's crazy, Tracy. See, I'm kidding. Now, Eddie, Eddie. Oh, boy. So.

2:17:13Go ahead, Tracy. I love you, but your mama's so fat when she dances, the record skips at the radio station. All right. Hey, Tracy, I'm here, too. Mikey. Mikey. Yeah. Your mama's so fat when she put on her yellow dress, people mistake her for a taxi. Come on, we got to go. We got to get this show on the road. Tracy Morgan, put Craig back on the phone. All right, all right. Goodbye, white people. Bye. Hey, Craig, we're going to put you on hold, dude. I'll listen. Yeah, and you can listen, so we'll put you on hold. All right, ladies and gentlemen, you ready for some more comedy? Yes. Let's get Mal Hall. Let's make some noise for Mal Hall. Steer at Eddie. All right. All right, keep it going for Boy Blender, everybody, huh? Hold some funny. Ladies, if you're keeping score, I'm still single. Mailhall.com if you want to hook up with me. Send a front and profile picture, please. Stop. Ballroom gown and bikini. Now, I hate being single because all you see is couples. I hate seeing couples because that's what I want. The holding hands, the kissing, the arguing. It all looks fun, right? I especially want to change my MySpace and Facebook profile to in a relationship.

2:18:55That's when it's official. The whole world knows about it, right? Especially on Facebook, it pops up. Eddie Papani is no longer listed as single. He is now married. Good. Good for you. Hates in couples. The couple I hate seeing the most is the homeless couple. Have you seen this bundle of joy just walking down the street? Ruining my day. This guy is gloating. I'm in a car with AC. This guy is pushing a stroller. No baby. It's a stroller full of crap, dragging cans behind it. I guess I just got married. That was cute. I've got shoes that match. This guy was wearing a combat boot and a flip-flop. What I'm trying to say is this guy gets more action on the street than I get in my apartment. This isn't even a joke anymore. Girls, hook up with me. I'm ranting. All right. We're going to bring the next comedian to the stage. You guys ready for some more comedy? This is not an easy job, and this is going to be...

2:20:08B-Rob's first time on stage, so I want you guys to be really nice to him, laugh really loud. He performs here all the time. Please welcome to the stage a lot of noise for Boston Rob, everybody. What a warm welcome. Thank you, guys. Big hand for Mal, you guys. Mal is just awesome. That dude is funny. Welcome to my first appearance, I guess. I guess that's what this is. We'll see. A life-defining moment. Some of you guys are just kind of putting a voice to the face. So I know that can kind of be weird and you're probably going in your head. I didn't know Mikey Mike had a half-retarded homeless cousin. But, yeah, that's true. I'm here, so I'm doing comedy now. Could be worse, though. It could be much worse. I could be perfectly round like Boy Blender back there. Sorry, sorry. Or I could have a face like Fergie. You know, she's got a face like someone farts in her Wheaties every morning.

2:21:33Some people are getting upset. She's not here, right? I don't want anyone to turn into, like, a pillar of salt or something. Okay. We're cool. I love farts, though. I love farts. You guys love farts? What's up? What's up? Yeah. I've always wondered, are silent farts funnier to deaf people? And are really, really loud farts an easy way for blind people to find you? Ponderous, man. That joke's stupid. That was stupid. I heard a couple people booing. Oh, I might offend people. Don't worry, the deaf people can't hear me. And the blind people, as long as I stop talking, they're never going to find me. A lot of people ask me, you know, a lot of people, hey, Boston Rob, why'd you move out to San Diego? You know, what brought you out here? Must have been the weather. Must have been. No, little thing called the bench warrant.

2:22:47And I did want to see what it was like to live in a city without championships. Calm down. Calm down, Hank Bauer. I do have some nice things to say about San Diego. The people out here are wicked nice compared to Boston. Even the cops are nicer out here. The cops are much nicer. When I first moved out here, I was driving through PB, and it's kind of confusing, so I had this very lost look on my face. If you saw me, you could tell that I didn't know where I was going. So this cop came up, and he was going to help me out with some directions, but I do this thing. I don't know if any of you guys do this thing. I pulled over immediately, shut the lights off, jumped in the back seat, laid down, and shoved my cigarette somewhere dark. Do you guys do that, or am I just weird? It's like a conditioning thing. It's like a conditioning thing.

2:24:04I don't know. Boston has what we call the T, which for out here, you guys call it the trolley. Anybody out here ride the trolley? No? Yeah. You don't ride the trolley. I know you. Liar. See, that's the thing. In Boston, everybody rides a T. In San Diego, no one rides the trolley. The only people that ride the trolley are hobos and upskirt photographers. But enough about my morning commute. That was retarded. Do you guys... You guys fans of Guitar Hero? You guys like Guitar Hero? You guys love Guitar Hero? Yeah. Everybody loves Guitar Hero. You know who hates Guitar Hero besides me? The Colorblind. Okay? No, no, no. I dare you. Have your friend Jerry, the Colorblind guy, come over to your house and have him play. He's sitting there. No, Jerry, no. Green, blue, green, blue. Come on. This is level one, man. Level one. You suck.

2:25:16But that's sad because he's colorblind. I do like video games. I go home every day and I play Money Hero. That's where I sit on my couch. I just go home, sit on my couch. I pretend I'm rich. This Top Ramen is luxurious, man. Yeah. I love this crown I'm wearing. I do. It's sad. It's sad. I'm so broke. I am so broke, man. And the worst is homeless people. It doesn't matter if you're broke. Now, homeless people always ask you for change, right? And a homeless guy comes up to me the other day. I'm in my car. You got any change? Man, I might have a roof over my head, but you have better credit, all right? I asked them to co-sign. And they're trendy, too.

2:26:13You know, they are trendy. These homeless people, man, they got it going on. I see them in camos. I see them just trendy homeless people. And it's funny how, you know, fashion fads come back in. They go out like the Jackie Onassis glasses. You know, those big glasses. That's what's hot now. I heard bell bottoms. They're starting to come in. It's crazy. I'm waiting for my fad to come back. VCRs. All right. I got 12 in my trunk right now. So anybody after the show. Ten bucks a pop. That's it. And then they got the HD movies, high-definition TVs. It's crazy. High-definition TVs, they're too clear for me. I won't buy one. There's some people that you just don't want to see in high def. You know what I mean? And I was reading the science blog on CNN, and it's crazy because now they're talking about 3D TVs. It's three-dimension televisions, which is the last thing I want because I don't want to be changing channels and have Sarah Jessica Parker's nose hit me in the foot. I'm not joking.

2:27:14Great, a league of their own on. No one else come over. Rosie O'Donnell's about to be on the screen. I love cartoons, though. That's one thing I do dig. Oh, man, cartoons. When I was a little kid, I think I watched them too literally because, you know, I'd watch Chuck Brown, which I call it as an adult because it's kind of embarrassing. But, you know, Charlie Brown, there was Pigpen on the show who always had, like, this syphilis cloud following him no matter where he was. He wouldn't even be in dirt, you know? If I was Charlie Brown, I would have called CPS for that kid. The Smurfs, they were a cult, right? Scooby-Doo, drug addict. The Flintstones, the Flintstones invented cars, but couldn't invent pants. I understand, though. I understand I've had a lazy Saturday, too. I get it. I get it. My favorite, though, when I was little, you know, Garfield. He had the comic.

2:28:12The comic books, which, believe it or not, yeah, I did read comic books. And he had a TV show, and I always was fascinated by that. So, you know, I got a cat, and I thought, man, this is going to be awesome. I'm going to feed my cat lasagna every day. So I'd feed him. Here you go, little kitty. I'd feed him some lasagna. There you go. Ah, he's not going to eat it. All right. Next day, I'll give you some fresh lasagna. Here you go. About a month later, he died. On a lighter note, though, on a lighter note. Silent letters suck, right? And you know who really hates silent letters is Sky. Let me give you a little back story. Not necessary. Very easy name to pronounce, Leonard, while back on the show. Sky, Sky, pronounce it how it was spelled, Leonard. So, yeah, right? That's a true story. Was that his joke? So I always wondered.

2:29:19That's his joke. So I always wondered. That's it. I had to work that in. I had to work that in. So I always wondered, when Sky goes to the zoo, does she go and see the leopard exhibits? Did she bring a, oh, that is not a nice look. Hi, Sky. Did she bring a bolognese sandwich? When she travels, does she take the I is Lee seat on her great way? To the awesome city of Pahonix, Arizona? Okay. I'm sorry. I feel bad. Sky, I hope none of your feelings were hurt, Sky. All right, you guys. Thanks so much. All right, folks. All right, let's do this. Let's do this. We got to bring both these guys on stage. So, Boy Blunder, let's get you up on stage, too. We're going to get you both up here.

2:30:33And first of all, before we do anything, big round of applause for both these guys. They both did very good. Okay, now, what we have, and we've used this thing before, we actually have a decibel meter. And it will record how many decibels are in the room. And so what we have is we got Jay from our promotion department. And he is going to hold the decibel meter while you guys make noise, all right? So whichever. person is able to get more of the decibel meter is going to be determined the comedy showdown winner yeah let's test it make as much noise as you can jay is it working yes it is working okay so what i'm going to do is i'm going to uh i'm going to put my hand over by the person and say their name and then i want you to make noise and uh when jay tells you to stop you stop so the first person that you're going to be voting uh for with your applause is boy blunder

2:31:39The second person that you'll be voting for is Boston Rob. And, Jay, do we have a winner? Yes, it's clear. It looks like Boston Rob is your new comedy showdown. Well done, my friend. Well done. Awesome. Well done. Guys, hopefully you enjoyed yourselves. Give yourselves a round of applause. And thank you, Boy Blunder, for being a part of this and getting up early and coming and doing this, man. And we will be back in the studio in just a second. One more round of applause for yourselves. You were great. It's the Mikey Show. It's Rock 105.3. Mikey Show continues. Thank you for being big enough to laugh at yourself this morning. Get incredible savings at the annual ski and snowboard mega sale. Today through Saturday only at the Del Mar Fairgrounds. Free admission.

2:32:52And up to 70% off on everything you need for the slopes. Plus, get a free Snow Valley lift ticket when you spend at least $50. Row after row of brand new equipment and clothing. All with full factory warranties. And all up to 70% off. Today through Saturday only at the Del Mar Fairgrounds. Get all the details at SanDiegoMegaSale.com. Welcome to Burger Max. Can I take your order? Yes, I'd like two dark roast coffees and four sugars. So that's coffees and two sugars. No, no, I said dark roast for sugars. Sure, please. Here you go, sir. This is orange juice. Yeah, orange juice. Extra sugar. Oh, that is so wrong. There's no such thing as a wrong order at a.m. p.m. Stop in and get 20 ounces of perfect every time coffee for just 97 cents. A.m. p.m., too much good stuff. At participating stores for a limited time. This tastes weird. Did you check the pot? What? Where the coffee comes from? No, I got it at the window. The window. Hey! Guys, look who gets his coffee from a window. A window? Dude, come on! There's an AM-PM right over there. Go get some real coffee. You deserve more than coffee from a window. Ditch the dishwater and come to AM-PM for 20 ounces of real coffee for just 97 cents. AM-PM, too much good stuff. At participating stores for a limited time. Hey, it's Boston Rob from The Mikey Show. I want to tell you about Time Warner Cable.

2:34:17If you recently got an HD TV, then you're going to want to watch TV in HD. Well, unlike AT&T and Satellite, Time Warner Cable gives you free HD programming and HD movies on demand. Time Warner Cable has a ton of high-definition channels. The best is watching ESPN in high definition. It's like you're at the game. Now, I know that life can keep you busy, but with Time Warner Cables DVR, you will never have to worry about missing your favorite shows. Call them now at 800-872-0185 and ask how you can get your free DVR service. Time Warner does internet phone and cable, and it's wicked affordable. You can build your own bundle for as low as $75 a month, and ask how you can get up to a $100 cash rebate. Call them at 800-872-0185 or visit them anytime at timewarnercable.com. Dedication is earning an MBA and working full-time. Persistence is never giving up, no matter what. Pride is raising a family and earning a doctorate. Commitment is doing whatever it takes to graduate. I am Valerie. Chitram. Sherrod. Eric. And I am a phoenix.

2:35:34University of Phoenix is a fully accredited institution of higher learning. Learn more at www.phoenix.edu. A leader doesn't ask people to do something they wouldn't do themselves. I couldn't ask my employees to go back to school if I wouldn't. So, after a 15-year break, I headed back. With a full-time job, school's tougher than I remember it. But there are no excuses. My name is Eric. I recently completed my MBA, and I am a Phoenix. University of Phoenix is a fully accredited institution of higher learning. Learn more at www.phoenix.edu. Remember, when calling work, never say you're sick. Say you've contracted something. It sounds better. You can enjoy midweek lift and lodging from $119 and Horizon Air Flies from $79. You'll soon be feeling much better. MammothMountain.com. Everyone wants to save some green today, and Henry's Farmer's Market makes it happen.

2:36:32With Henry's, 72-hour sale now through Sunday. With savings, like boneless, skinless chicken breast, $1.77 per pound. Haas avocados, three for a dollar. Plus 25% off all vitamins and supplements. Not to get too sidetracked, he looks great. San Diego's Rock. Five, three. Hi, is this where I sign in for the Worldwide Interglobal Micro Macroeconomic Conference? Yes, but the Worldwide Interglobal Micro Macroeconomic Conference is a gathering of leading financial experts. And you seem to be a burrito. Actually, I'm the cheesy double beef burrito from Taco Bell. You do sound delectable. But can you describe your economic theory? Seven words. Double the beef for only 89 cents. Double the beef for only 89 cents? How's that for a bailout plan? My apologies, Mr. Cheesy Double Beef Burrito. You're clearly one of the great economic thinkers of our time. Apology accepted. By the way, double the beef for only 89 cents is actually eight words. Yeah, I was never good with numbers.

2:37:43Taco Bell's Cheesy Double Beef Burrito. A double portion of seasoned beef smothered in warm melty nacho cheese sauce. It's double the beef for only 89 cents. Think outside the bun. Double the beef compared to Burrito Supreme. At participating locations, prices may vary tax extra. World Extreme Cage Fighting hits San Diego for the first time ever. Uriah Faber takes on former UFC champion Jens Pulver in a rematch from one of the best WEC fights in 2008. Plus, WEC lightweight champion Jamie Varner defends his title against Donald Cowboy Cerrone. Bud Light presents World Extreme Cage Fighting, Sunday, January 25th at the San Diego Sports Arena. Tickets start at just $35 and are available now at the Sports Arena box office and Ticketmaster.com. I have three lives. Family, work, and social. And that means messaging. Who you ask? Two kids, one husband, two sisters, parents, in-laws, a boss, a staff, clients, friends. You know, enough to fill a small stadium. But with the amazing deal I got on this NV2 from Verizon Wireless, I can text, send pics, IM, and email that small stadium. And that's how I manage my life. All three of them. Verizon Wireless now has the LG NV2 for a super low $49.99 after $50 mail-in rebate debit card and new two-year activation.

2:39:03Plus, check out more sweet deals on 3G messaging phones, like the BlackBerry Curve and LG Voyager. Switch to America's largest and most reliable wireless network at any Verizon Wireless store, Circuit City, VerizonWireless.com, or call 1-800 to join in. Got another text. Activation, early termination, and other fees apply. Largest based on their own operated network. Coverage details at VerizonWireless.com. We are under attack. On January 23rd. We can be slaves! Theater's January 23rd. For more info, go to entertheunderworld.com. Pay for a day, come back all year. With the SeaWorld Fun Card, you can come back again and again and be part of a year full of fun. Experience the spectacular Shamu Show and the thrills of Journey to Atlantis. Plus, enjoy all of SeaWorld's 2009 seasonal events. Details at SeaWorldSanDiego.com. I'm about to present to you a straightforward commercial for Geico, the third largest personal auto insurer in the country. Last year, over 3 million drivers switched to Geico, and Geico received a customer satisfaction rate of 97%.

2:40:10Standard & Pause has consistently awarded GEICO a AAA rating for financial strength. This is usually where I'd say something cute or clever. But like I said at the beginning, we're keeping this straightforward. Goodbye to you now. If you ride a motorcycle, you might be thinking, Oi, GEICO customers seem to be having a lot of fun and saving money on their car insurance. But what about us bikers? Why can't we save money? This makes us angry. Let's form a biker gang and go and tell them what for. Oi, hold on. Just call it. Geico ensures all sorts of motorcycles like cruisers, street, sport, touring, and high-performance bikes. So they're on it. Now let's have a little smile. Now Geico offers insurance on all the stuff that moves you, including motorcycles. Call 1-800-44-CYCLE or visit geico.com. Mikey Show. With a Mikey moment. This one year for my girlfriend at the time, now we're married, I...

2:41:08Took a piece of paper, and I wrote down memories that her and I had created together on separate little pieces of paper. And I, you know, folded them up, and I put them inside the mason jar. And on the outside of it, I wrote memory jar. Thoughtful. You know, she's never forgot that memory jar. I did a certain thing that was similar. Rob does this every time he makes fun of it. He makes fun of it. Mine was more of a... Papoose of affection. Oh, wow. That's really nice, too. It was kind of like, well, if you don't have a mason jar, if you're not a mason, I used a mug and put lady feelings in it. The Mikey Show continues. Rock 105.3. Geeks will be happy to hear this. 20th Century Fox and Warner Brothers have finally reached a settlement for Watchmen, allowing it to be released on its scheduled dates. The Dodgers are parting ways with their center fielder, Andrew Jones, after signing him to a huge deal last offseason. The team released him yesterday. Really? Yep. Well, Rob, congratulations. Wow. I'm still kind of shaking from that. Let's talk to Craig Gass and see what he thought. He's been holding for us this whole time. Craig, are you there? Craig. Craig, are you there?

2:42:58Yeah, can you hear me? Yeah, now I can hear you. Craig, what did you think? It was really cool to have that conversation with him last night and then to hear the whole thing come to fruition and hear him getting laughs. I told him there's always a couple golden rules in comedy. Number one is make fun of yourself. Number two is that fish out of water. I'm from Boston, but now I'm in San Diego and what that's like. Right. And third is always end your set by making fun of Sky if you can. Okay, that's not cool, Frank. Absolutely. Hey, listen, your plan worked perfectly. It did. And I told Rob, you know, we'll do a show together because I'm going to do a show sometime in the next, like, month or two in San Diego. I'm going to have Rob do the show with me and perform with me. Holy cow, that'd be huge. That was fantastic. That would be so awesome. That's fantastic. It'll probably be at 4th and B. It'll be like some large venue. We'll have Rob do the show with me. But there is actually someone else in the car who actually wanted to make a commentary. He was listening the whole time. Who is it? Who's in the car? Wow. Well, you know, you guys have like the good OJ and the bad OJ. Yes. Yes. I'm in a car with, I don't know if you guys ever heard of wildly inappropriate OJ. Oh, no.

2:44:22No, we haven't. We haven't. Mike hasn't. I'm not sure we want to. Let me put him on the phone, everybody. This is wildly inappropriate, OJ. All right, I'll see you guys later. What's up? What's up, wildly inappropriate, OJ? Hey, guys, I really enjoyed this show. Hey, OJ, what was your favorite part? I'll tell you, it's when he killed. It's when he just... Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. We figured you would like that part. We figured that would be the part that you liked the most. Let me just say something to Rob. Rob, you filled me with so much laughter today. I feel like going out and just murdering people. Okay. Let's quadruple over the top OJ, ladies and gentlemen. I had to take the phone away from him. You shouldn't be with him. I totally agree. Tom Arnold told me that actually hanging out with a wildly inappropriate OJ is actually something called a trigger point. I didn't know that. Yes, it is. And he probably doesn't want to say that out loud. It's not really appropriate. It's not very appropriate.

2:45:31Now, I'm bummed out because I didn't get to hear Boy Blunder. I'm sure he did well because he got a big response at the end of the thing when they voted. He did pretty good. He did great. And it is a frightening thing. It is so frightening to stand up, especially in front of people that know you and do what he did. I think Rob did a great job. I'm still scared. Yeah. Hey, you pooped a little. That's right. A little. Hey, when you get into town, Craig, hopefully it's sooner than later. And we'll see you pretty soon, man. Yeah, definitely. And I got to tell you, the one thing that was really funny is Rob and I wrestled with how do you exactly how do you say on the air what you can do with a pack of cigarettes? That was my favorite part of the conversation. Yeah. That was the best part of the conversation. But Rob, he did really great. And I'm sure the boy Blunder did, too. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to hear him. But they both deserve a lot of credit for it. Just for being able to stand up in front of people and do that. It's very scary. Yeah, yeah. You did a great job. All right, man. I'll see you guys soon. All right, Craig. We'll talk to you later. Thanks, Craig. Bye. That's professional comedian Craig Guess. And he's going to have Boston Rob doing a little stuff with him the next time he's in town. Oh, man. So, Rob, how nervous were you?

2:46:52One to ten, I was definitely a ten, but it wasn't that nervous where, oh my God, I forgot everything. Oh my God, I'm not going to go up there. It was a nervous where I was channeling it all to make me calm. It was weird. Did you feel like you were kind of outside of your body a little bit? Exactly. When I got into my last joke, I go, did I miss a bunch of stuff? Was I here the whole time? I was not. You know, I kind of just let whatever take over and just went. You didn't even look nervous, dude. No, dude. Did you see? I picked up my tea at one point, and I was shaking so hard that I put it down. I said, I can't pick up anything. I think that's because you drink so much tea. It's all the caffeine. There's a lot of caffeine. A lot of tea. Yesterday, Eddie goes, Mike, will you look at this? This was during a commercial break. And Rob had three kinds of tea in front of him. I love different kinds of tea. He had a hot tea, a cold tea, and some tea that I've never seen before. I don't know what it was.

2:47:59You had like three different kinds. Well, you did great, dude. Thank you. 570-1053 if people want to call in and let Rob know what they thought. I think Mal, too. Mal killed it. I was going to say, that guy is awesome. He's funny. He did a really good job. He's funny. And thanks to all the P1s for just coming out and being a witness. Malhall.com is Mal's website, and you can go there and find out where he's going to be because he does shows, and he's great, man. Yeah. He's great. And, yeah, that was a fun experience. That was a really fun experience. I was really blown away. I was not expecting it to be that good. No, me neither. I was ready to bust on them. Skye said that, too. When we were walking back, she was like, that was better than I expected. Yeah, I thought someone was at least going to, like, forget a joke or stumble or have to, like, awkwardly go back over to the notes. But none of that. Some of the text messages that are coming in. Hey, B-Rob, when is your next show? You killed it. I'm all in. That's P1 Matt. Awesome. Mikey, B-Rob killed it. He was awesome. He didn't even look nervous on stage. He was a natural-born comedian. Good job, B-Rob and Boy Blunder. That's P1 Final. Yeah, and we did. We webcast all of that. And, of course, we're now podcasting the entire show. So if you want to hear all of it, if you missed any of Boston Rob's stand-up comedy, we podcast the entire show now. Just go over to Ashley's. Right after the show. I'll be there.

2:49:24You know, load it up and get going. The entire thing. She's got no friends. And no life. And no life. She does have $165 in vet bills, though. She does have that. The video is going to be online, too? Yeah. Is it really? Yeah, they do video, too. Very cool. I'm definitely going to watch that. I had family in Boston listening and watching us. Really? Yeah. Dude, my phone is blowing. I'm, like, tripping right now. Hey, and for people that are listening that don't know this, you can now stream us on your iPhone. They've got an application called iHeartRadio, and you can download KIOZ and listen to us on your iPhone or on your whatever the other thing is called. Mikey, one last thing. It was so funny watching Ashley look at the camera literally every two minutes. I just had to make sure that I was, you know. It says, yes, Ash, you look great, and we see you. That's P1 Steve. Perfect. That's what I was trying to get across. Mikey, Rob was laugh out loud funny. Oh, man. Laugh out loud. It's P1 Dove. Man, guys, I've got an adrenaline rush for B-Rob. I know, I was sweating in my seat, man. I was like, oh, this is so... Oh, me too. In a much different way, Eddie. You guys are sweating in a way different way. I'm human. Let's see. P1 Kitty McMue is on the line right now. Hi, Kitty. Hey, how you guys doing? How you doing?

2:50:46All right, listen, I just want to tell Rob, he killed it, man. I mean, with that Fergie joke, I was bent over my... You should have seen the faces he was making. It was hysterical. The faces were fantastic. Thank you so much, man. I just want to congratulate Eddie on his baby. It's the greatest thing, man. I got an 18-month-old boy, and it's going to change your life forever, so congratulations. Thanks, man. What do you think Eddie's having, a boy or a girl? I think he's going to have a boy, man. Yeah? Got to have a boy. You'll know by the way she's carrying it. Really? That's what they say. What does that mean? If it's up high, it's a boy. If it's down low, it's a girl. There you go. There you go. All right, brother. Thank you. Thanks, man. Hey, Rob, your cousin Mike is on the line. Oh, yes. I just talked to him. Mike. Hey, Mikey. Where are you? Are you in Boston? Yes, it's freezing here. I bet it is. Is it wicked cold? Wicked cold. It is wicked cold. It's about 20 degrees. I'm stuck in my house, and I'm hating it right now. What did you think of your cousin Rob? He did a fantastic job. I'm so proud of him. And just wanted to tell him that excellent job. Thank you, man. I love you, cuz. I'm so glad he saw it. That was awesome. Awesome! Thank you for calling, Mike. Okay, Mike. Love you, cuz. You guys all know our friend Kimber, right?

2:52:11Oh, yeah. I know Kimber. I know Kimber again. An email from her that was very unusual and very funny. And I don't know that this has happened to all of us, but something pretty crazy happened to her. And I will read you that after this. Used to eat a lot of natural food. Until he learned most people die of natural causes. Mikey. Engine. Just come in. So many things can go wrong with your car. That's why Pep Boys invented one place that can make them all right. Check tires. Pep Boys announces the 1-2-3 tire sale. Buy one tire starting at the incredible low price of $19.99. That's $19.99. Buy any two installed tires and get a free oil change. Or buy any three installed tires, get a free oil change, and get the fourth tire free. After mail-in rebate, both offers exclude Cornell.

2:53:21Now through Sunday at Pep Boys. Buy three, get the fourth tire free. Plus a free oil change. Pep Boys, the people who brought you buy three, get the fourth tire free, are now bringing you free oil changes as well. Call 1-800-PEP-BOYS or pepboys.com. Connect Tech Support Plus from AT&T makes anyone an instant technical genius. Why won't you? Connect Tech Support Plus. Instant genius. Who's the man now, printer? I am, thank you. Call the U.S.-based experts at Connect Tech seven days a week. For problems too big for the phone, they'll even make house calls. Oh, this stupid program is acting up again. Connect Tech Support Plus. Hi. Instant genius. Is it hot in here or is it my unfrozen computer? Connect Tech tackles the toughest tech questions over the phone. Dude, where's that song I just downloaded? Connect Tech Support Plus. Instant genius. Yeah.

2:54:23There it is. Let's celebrate with a little air guitar. Connect Tech Support Plus from AT&T. Technology support for you and your home. Call 1-800-344-1734 or go to att.com slash connect tech. Residential customers only not available in all areas. Hardware and software limitations apply. Terms and conditions apply. See att.com slash connect tech for terms and conditions. Thank you very much. You can't smell it on my breath. It doesn't make me stumble around or pass out. It doesn't mess up my ability to drive.

2:55:26I don't wake up with a headache the next morning, but it gives me a tremendous buzz. I'm talking about gambling. I can't bet like most people. When I gambled and lost, I kept gambling. I loved the action, and I thought I could win it all back. Nobody could tell I had a problem. I wouldn't believe it. For a while, it was easy to hide. In the end, I lost more than money. I lost myself. I lied. I lost my job. I hurt everyone who cared about me. If the funds become something that's hurting you or your family get help. Call 1-800-GAMBLER. That's 1-800-GAMBLER. A message from the California Office of Problem Gambling.

2:56:14Forget everything you've heard from every other insurance company out there. You see, for more than 40 years, AIS has been known for saving Californians money. How much? An annual savings of $650 per year on their auto insurance. And now your AIS savings will go even deeper because effective immediately, AIS is eliminating all fees for new customers. The facts speak for themselves. Do you want to save money in this struggling economy? The choice is up to you. Hey, it's Mikey. Call AIS at 1-800-777-4AIS. or AISinsurance.com. Check out Grave Digger today at South Bay Motorsports in Chula Vista. The king of monster trucks is at South Bay Motorsports today between 3 and 7 p.m. Bring your camera and get an autograph with Grave Digger today at South Bay Motorsports. Go south and save big. Are you overdue for an oil change? If so, don't put your car's engine at risk. Get in the zone. Now at AutoZone, get five quarts of Pennzoil conventional motor oil and a Fram extra guard oil filter for just $16.99. That's right, $16.99. Some restrictions apply. See store for details. Don't wait until it's too late. Maximize your engine's life and performance. Get to AutoZone. Do it yourself and save. Get in the zone.

2:57:31Are you credit challenged? Having a tough time purchasing anything? You won't at USA Discounters, your incredible credit store. If you need furniture, computers, electronics, flat screen TVs, tires, rims, and much more, USA Discounters offers fast automatic approval for all who qualify. No cash up front and no payments for 60 days. Make USA Discounters your place to shop. Go to usadiscounters.net for directions and information, shop online, or call 877-870-7700 to speak to one of their credit counselors and get automatically approved. Get the credit you deserve, plus immediate delivery with no money down for 60 days. USA Discounters is your one-stop shopping for the brand-name quality items you want. Furniture, electronics, and even jewelry at low, low monthly payments with no cash up front. Too good to be true? Call now and find out if you qualify. 877-870-7700 or go to usadiscounters.net. USA Discounters, 476 Broadway in Jula Vista. Certain restrictions may apply. Contact store for details. Hi, this is Magic Johnson. My second year in the NBA, I blew out my knee. I thought the season was lost. But my teammates picked me up. They battled hard and made the playoffs. And I realized I didn't have to do it all myself. Sooner or later, we all need help. If you need funds quickly,

2:58:51Jackson Hewitt has the Money Now Loan. A Money Now Loan is money like magic. It's the fastest way to get money at tax time, and applying for a Money Now Loan is simple. Call today, 1-800-234-1040, or visit jacksonhewitt.com. Jackson Hewitt, a partner and a path. The show continues. Featuring Mikey. I'm very attracted to intelligent women. Eddie. I think that my guacamole is the best in the world. The Mikey Show's on. And the Comedy Showdown winner, ladies and gentlemen, 902. It was just announced that Circuit City is requesting to shut down and liquidate its remaining 567 U.S. stores. Oh, my. That means some good stuff on sale. All of them? Yeah, it's remaining U.S. stores. They closed a handful, and now they've got to get rid of them all. Ah, the good guys. No, they're different. That's a different store.

3:00:47The Detroit Lions have their man. They hired Titans defensive coordinator Jim Schwartz. Welcome back to the show. Hey, by the way, thank you to Pizza Station who stopped by this morning. They're located at 1050 Park Boulevard. Great pizza. Good pizza, man. Get the Mikey pizza. It's delish. What does that have on it? Is that the one with the little... Pepperoni, sausage, jalapeno, and ricotta. Ricotta. I like the jalapenos. Yummy. Anyway, they're downtown San Diego at the College Trolley Station. They do deliveries downtown, Golden Hill, Bankers Hill, and Hillcrest. Hillcrest. Hi. And right now, they're running a special. Sausage pizza for me. Oh, really? Yeah. $5 for a 14-inch cheese pizza. $5. Wow. $5 pizza. $5 14-inch long. 14-inch pizza for $5. Their phone number, 619-231-0300. That's Pizza Station. Thank you for catering food this morning. You guys know our friend Kimbra, a friend of my wife and I, and now you guys all know her. And great chick. And she had a little something happen.

3:02:08And she was sharing it with us. And I asked her if it was okay to share with everybody. And she was embarrassed but said, yeah, sure. Cool. Yesterday I got home from some appointments around 2.30 p.m. and was working away in my home office. Since I like to be comfy, I immediately take off my suit and put on my white sweatpants and a modest cotton strappy nighty dress that falls to my knees. I capped that hot little outfit with some flip-flops. I know, good stuff. That's hot. She says, around 3.30 in the afternoon, I decided that I should take out the trash. And as a result, I locked myself out of my apartment. Mind you, this is the second time I've done this in six weeks. So here I am in my revealing PJs locked out, and I'm thinking to myself, I'm not going to spend another $75 to call a locksmith. No way. I see that my front window is open. I think to myself, rather, I wonder, if I get a ladder, can I rip my screen out and climb through it? Why not? So I go next door to a rental house that is being fixed up. There's some guys there speaking zero English. So I mime to them what I want, and they let me borrow their ladder.

3:03:36I bring the ladder over by the ledge in front of my building and directly next to that open window. I climb up the ladder in my hot little outfit and realize that there is still a good foot to go before reaching the ledge. No worries. I jump and hang there. No! This is quite a sight. Clawing my way up. Clawing her way up. Seriously, my arms and elbows are now completely scratched up and my white sweatpants are filthy. So once I'm up and look down, I get a little freaked. No worries, I think. This should only take a minute. I reach across to the screen part of the window and realize it's a little further than I thought. I still try and get to it with one arm precariously balancing on the ledge. The screen does not come out, but by now it's bent and ripped to shreds. So I sit back down on the ledge with my legs dangling over the side, and here I sat for about 20 minutes trying to figure out how to get back down. I was just up too far. A cop drove by, and I yelled for help. To no avail. Finally, a kid walked by, and I asked if he spoke English. Hooray, he does!

3:05:05I asked him to get the men next door to come over and help me. They came, they climbed, they helped me down in my hot little outfit. So there I sat on the ground once again trying to figure out what to do from here. When suddenly I realized, oh, my friend Ann is homesick and she's got a spare key to my place. Oh, perfect. I do not know her number though because it is in my cell phone and I don't have it memorized. By the way, my cell phone is now ringing off the hook as work is trying to get a hold of me. But she lives in Carlsbad on the other side of the railroad tracks by the beach about a 15 to 20 minute walk from where I am. I still I still would rather not walk in my hot little outfit now dirty and bleeding. Oh, my gosh. So I knock on all of my neighbors doors, hoping I can con one of them into driving me over there.

3:06:06But nobody's home from work yet. Then I think, maybe I'll just wait because Ann's going to be coming over for dinner anyway about 6 o'clock, but that's about two hours from now. No way. I start walking. No. Seriously. No. In my flip-flops, white sweatpants covered in dirt, a nightie dirty and bleeding. Down the street in the village of Carlsbad. I decided to avoid at all costs all main roads. So I weave hands crossed over my chest. Because ladies, as you know, it's not pretty speed walking without a bra on. My head is down. And there I go down through the streets until I reach the path next to the railroad tracks. Here. I find a part of the fence that's low enough for me to scale and I scale it. What? What are you? She puts, I'm not kidding. People around me think I'm a loony person. I think the same thing. I race across the tracks and try desperately to remember if Ann Street is to the right or to the left. I start walking to the right and realize after two blocks.

3:07:38It's the wrong direction. I backtrack and finally find her place and knock on her door. Surprise, it's me. She was there, drove me home, where I got my spare key, and I'll have another maid today. That's quite a little... What an adventure. That's quite a little adventure. Wow. A journey, if you will. Imagine seeing some bloody, you know... I would call the cops. Yeah, seriously. You're like, yeah, there's a rabid back woman walking the streets right now, and somebody's got to pick her up. Crying out loud. Like, hey, there's Jodie Foster from The Accused. The Nike Show continues on The Rock. It's the West Coast premiere of NASCAR, the Auto Club 500, Sunday, February 22nd. Be there when your favorite NASCAR drivers roar into Southern California. It's Jimmy Jump. Help me help people in need through a special ticket offer for the NASCAR Sprint Cup race this February. $48 of every $148 package will go to the charity, and you'll receive a ticket for the race, pit pass, access to a Q&A session with me, and more. Auto Club Speedway, where the 10 and 15 freeways meet. For tickets, call 800-944-RACE or visit AutoClubSpeedway.com. What is racing done California style, you ask? Well, it all starts with the West Coast premiere of NASCAR. This means blurred blue walls, 200-mile-per-hour straightaways,

3:09:08games, live music, activities for the whole family, roaring crowds, and home sweet home to the three-time defending Sprint Cup Series champion. And there's only one place to catch it, the Auto Club 500, Sunday, February 22nd at Auto Club Speedway. For tickets and more information, call 800-944-RACE or visit AutoClubSpeedway.com. Amco's a place if you've got a transmission issue, if you've got a check engine light on in your car, that is usually indicative of a... transmission issue. And so my suggestion to you is that you take it to Amco. Now, it's pretty cool. If the check engine lights on, you go to Amco, they will tell you why it's on for free. And if any additional diagnosis is required, just mention that you're a P1 and you're going to get 10% off on the repairs. It's a pretty decent deal. Remember, man, Amco, they don't want to fix what isn't broken.

3:10:07which is great because when you take it to the dealership, a lot of times that's exactly what happens. They do want to replace things, and that's not what Amco's all about. They just want to fix it, and they want to get you in there and get it done right and get you out quickly and at the best price. And so I urge you to go down to Amco and check it out. Amco is double A. Beep, beep. M-C-O. Why would you take it anywhere else? It's AT&T and the funky outer space space is Bootsy Collins with device, device, baby. Oh, hello. Hey, Bootsy, I want a cool new phone, but my budget won't... Well, uh, AT&T's got 50% off all LG phones, and they're... Fella, you got the LG Insight, a smartphone with a tippity-tapping touchscreen, the LG View, with mobile TV all up in the yizzle, and the slippity-sliding LG shot. So they're all 50% off, huh? Yeah, it's Funkonomics, Bobble, and Bootsy's got the, uh, stimulus package. Okay.

3:11:07Until next time, it's Bootsy Baby. Thanks, Bootsy. I'm going to go. And AT&T, your world delivered. The 50% off LG phone sale featuring the LG Shines is $24.99 after mail-in rebate. Pay $74.99 for phone and after mail-in rebate, receive $50 AT&T promotion card to your service agreement and data package purchase required. Certain geographic and other monthly charges and restrictions apply. See store for details. Former UFC middleweight champ Rich Ace Franklin takes on former pride welterweight and middleweight champ Dan Henderson. Plus, Mauricio Shogun Hua looks to avenge his loss to UFC Hall of Famer Mark the Hammer Coleman, the ultimate fighting champion. Championship presents UFC 93, Franklin vs. Henderson from the O2 Arena in Dublin, Ireland. This Saturday, only on pay-per-view. Visit 93.ufc.com for details. Cards subject to change. Skiers and snowboarders get incredible savings at the annual ski and snowboard mega sale. Today through Saturday only at the Del Mar Fairgrounds. Free admission and up to 70% off on everything for the slopes.

3:12:11Details at sandiegomegasale.com. Right now at Lexus Carlsbad, get 2.9% APR financing and approved premium credit for certified pre-owned Lexus RX and RX hybrid models. Lexus Carlsbad, I-5, Palomar and Port Road, Car Country, Carlsbad. Limited terms, offer ends 2209. 105.3 Traffic. Brought to you by Sleep Train Mattress Centers. It's a good-looking ride in our freeways right now. We do have Caltrans crews, though, in Route 2 where somebody lost a load of lumber in the roadway. Eastbound 52, just before Mass Boulevard. as you head down the hill in towards Santee, so use some caution there. Other than that, pretty much everything else is up to speed, looking just fine here. No major problems out of town in Orange County and Riverside. Border wait, though, is still about two hours in some ways at San Ysidro. I'm Rick Lawrence on Rock 105.3. So scared, confused, and compelled. San Diego's Rock 105.3. Featuring tough love with Eddie. Dear the bedless dorkman. Oh, what?

3:13:29Got to be one of the best pranks I have ever heard in my entire life. I don't think you should be mad. You should thank them for letting you be part of such a monumental event. Right? You know, like all the emails that get forwarded around, your bed could be that picture. Oh. Which is awesome. Dude, you're going to be famous. You should take a picture of it. Absolutely. You're the dweeb that has his bed bolted to the ceiling. You know which tail you're going to get from that? None. Yeah. Mikey's show continues. Welcome back. It's the Mikey's show. It is 9-16. Well, just in case you haven't heard yet, yesterday a U.S. Airways jet crash-landed into the Hudson River. Luckily, all 155 people aboard the plane survived. The Red Sox gave Kevin Euclid a four-year, $40 million extension, avoiding arbitration. Yeah! Rob's happy. He's from Boston. Very good day. Earlier in the show, man, we had a guy on that was actually on flight 1549 describing moment by moment what that flight was like. It was pretty amazing. And if you want to hear it, we're going to have it on our podcast. We podcast the entire show now. So you can go to MikeyShow.com. You can download the entire show if you want to hear that. Barack Obama's half-brother, Samson Obama. Samson? Samson? Yeah.

3:15:07Slippy, slappy. No, no, no. Samson. Not slippy or slappy. Nope. Samson. Samsonite. No, Samson. Way off. Samson. That's a dumber, dumber reference. Sean! Your brother is going to be inaugurated on Tuesday. Samson, what do you think? Cut A. So filled with excitement and I don't know how to describe it in words. Then if we cut the big day, then we go as a family. There you go. What the? hell was that? I have no idea what he said. Well, his brother's from Africa. That's Samson. He's from Kenya. So he was saying he's excited, you know? Yeah, the family members are coming from Kenya for the inauguration. What about this guy? Yes. What about Howie Mandel? Howie Mandel goes into the hospital, right? Oh, Sean. Oh, I've heard this one.

3:16:03Oh, no. No, it's not a joke. It's not a setup for a joke. Walks into a hospital. No. Here's the deal. Goes to the hospital, is in there, gets out, calls Billy Bush. Take a breath. And what happened, Howie? Cut nine. What they do is they actually put you totally out, and they take those defibrillators, and they yell clear, and then they shock you, and your heart goes back to a normal. rhythm. They released me right away from the hospital and I got dizzy and I must have passed out because I woke up in a gurney in the ambulance going back to the hospital. There's an emergency room near where I live. They know me. They go, Howie, it's like I got my own booth. I have my own gurney there. I show up there once, twice a month with an ailment. But this wasn't it. Oh, man. Billy Bush loves celebrities. He loves celebrities.

3:17:06Real funny. How do we do it? We get it. How are you doing? Another thing about this Howie Mandel thing, he is a hardcore germaphobe. He's like Sean. And so when he had to go to this hospital in Toronto, which isn't his normal hospital that has like a special gurney and clothes and everything for him. He has a hospital that has a special gurney. I thought he was joking. He was saying they like know him there because he's like a hypochondriac. He's a germaphobe. So they like know to like they treat him special at his hospital. He actually is there enough. I thought it was a joke. Well, I don't know if they actually have like a special gurney, but they have special preparations they do just for Howie Mandel because they know that he needs it because he's a little cuckoo with the whole germaphobe thing. So, but he was in Toronto filming when this irregular heartbeat thing came up. And so they took him to a hospital there in Toronto. And he like said he threw a fit. Like he wouldn't wear the gown. He's on the gurney in his own clothes. He won't wear any of the hospital clothing. He like wasn't having any of it. Well, dude, like Howie.

3:18:08You know, the hospital clothing, they like specially wash that stuff. But somebody else wore it, Mike. Yeah, but they sanitize that stuff. Right, Sean? Look at him. You're telling me. All they do, they just wash it. No, come on. Don't they have industrial? You're wrong. I worked in a hospital. I worked in a hospital for almost 10 years. That's true. The black people used to make fun of you. Yeah, they did. Because every once in a while, Sean would go, what would you say to them that they would make fun of? You know, I would say, oh, man, that's cool. And they would go, yeah, man, that's cool. I was a huge dork. But, you know, they just had, like, you know, industrial-sized washing machines. But they would just put, you know, detergent in it, clothes in it. You know, it was kind of normal. See, I thought that they would, like.

3:19:08practically boil their clothes or whatever. They had a special procedure for like surgery stuff, scrubs and things like that. But for, you know, like hospital gowns, they didn't really do anything but wash them. Well, you don't need to do anything else but that. Sorry, there's a rave going on next door. Yeah, what is that? Is that going on on your end, Sean? You're not changing into an outfit or anything, are you? I didn't know because I heard the... Oh, wow. You guys are really something else. You guys are really something else. Man, sorry, Sean. Sean, I'm sorry. I can't believe you went there. Below the belt. Below the belt. I wouldn't have done that. None of us would have actually. Sean's our friend. I wouldn't even do that. Brutal, Mike. You are brutal. I kind of feel bad now. Oh, no. Geez. A little too late for that. Nobody helped me out on that one. Get all your laughs, Mike.

3:20:09Okay, so Chandra Wilson's on a show called Grey is Anatomy. Grey is Anatomy, yeah, what about it? Is everyone okay? Grey is Anatomy. Yes, Grey is Anatomy. Grey is Anatomy. And I guess Grey is the, he's like the lead guy. Meredith Grey is, well, Meredith Grey, she's an intern now, resident at the hospital, yes. Well, Chandra Wilson, apparently, she's talking about her TiVo, cut 16. I must admit that the TiVo is still sitting in the box. No. It is leaning next to my closet because I can't let go of my VHS tapes. Why not? It's the thing that lets me know that I'm going to watch those episodes that day and then be able to move on because I have to watch them because I need that tape for the next day. Otherwise, if I have the TiVo, then I have the back. It'll store up. Exactly, and then I'll be forever in front of the TV. No, but it's so convenient. You will thank me one day.

3:21:10No, just give it back. Patricia, because she needs it. But I intention, because otherwise, you know, I probably would have had to do a whole show where I came on and had the ceremony of giving it back. But the intention is to move forward with the ages. Then it will happen. Still use the VCR. That's Dr. Bailey, by the way. Is that who that she plays? Yes. on the Today Show is the guy that we had on this morning, and he's with his whole family. To be honest, it's hard to believe we just survived that. You were going to Charlotte. Your mom's having surgery, by the way. We wish her well. It's occurring today. You were seated separately in the plane. They have their one-year-old sitting on their lap. And the four-year-old leans over to give the kid a kiss on the face, kisses the kid's nose, which makes the kid sneeze all over the system. Sneeze right in her mouth. Which, by the way, made the four-year-old laugh. With Damien and Martin, you were with Sophia in row 23. And there was a mix-up with our seating arrangement. Unfortunately, for the first time, we were seated separately. You were sitting...

3:22:31It's impossible to watch the adults. I know. Yeah. This is hilarious. With these two kids clowning. I mean, they're literally, the one-year-old and the four-year-old are just clowning with each other. Yeah, the four-year-old just made a face. And the one-year-old just started giggling. Yeah, yeah. And Matt's trying to be like, in this peril, you know, peril that you're in at this time. ...to a guy. And for some reason, before the flight took off, there was this, something about this guy comforted you. Can you describe that? Totally screwing around with each other. Well, you know, I wasn't so happy about being seated. She's yanking her daughter now. Because her daughter's like practically crawling out of her hands out of her lap to get at the one-year-old. And they're showing the mom. They're having to do a close-up on the mom now. And the mom is having to yank the kid. Yeah, they want the kids out of the frame. Yeah, they don't want the kids. It's so distracting. You mean like on your lap? He seemed like a very calm, cool, and collected gentleman. You know what's not distracting during an interview about people that have just survived something really amazing? What?

3:23:44He seemed very traumatized by the whole experience. Traveled an awful lot, and he also mentioned he was a father of five children. So that put you at ease a little bit. Yeah, yeah, he was taken by my son right away. Oh, wow. After takeoff, there's this noise. Right. Can you describe the noise? Yeah, it was just sort of like something hit something. Yeah, it wasn't like super loud, but yeah, something happened, and... He had been reading, and then he looked out the window. He said, oh, problem with the engine. Just like that. Matter of factly. Yeah. Oh, problem with the engine. I think it just exploded. We're going down anyway. And there comes the Hudson. I can't. We had this guy on this morning, the guy that they're talking to right now with his wife. We had him on this morning, and it was pretty amazing. Pretty amazing story. Jeremy Piven, you know Jeremy Piven has mercury poisoning, right? I love how Hollywood is mocking him now. Oh, yeah, they are. I'm telling you, man. He was in this Broadway show called Speed the Plow. And he had to leave the show because of mercury poisoning, eating too much sushi. Well, he's on Good Morning America. Diane Sawyer is interviewing him. And it's very clear that Diane Sawyer has made her mind up that this is all BS. Oh, wow. And really, that is the...

3:25:10sort of vibe out there right now the vibe out there is that he didn't he didn't want to do the show really and that uh he wasn't really very happy with the show and that uh he wanted a party and you know during this period of time he's out there partying which she asked him about by the way uh but here he is uh talking about it cut 12 There's so many people saying, mercury points, too much fish, sushi defense here? What is it? Is it true? It is true, and I felt the same way. I had no reference for it whatsoever. The first week of rehearsal, I started feeling a certain kind of fatigue I had no reference for. I went to the doctor. He tested everything. He said, there's nothing wrong with you. We're going to get your heavy metals in. They came back. They were six times. what the average person has. So it's just fatigue, other things. At one point you were talking about not being able to remember the lines. What other things? So at the beginning, that's what it was. And it progressed to the point where that final Sunday, I had problems.

3:26:12Skye, do you know anything about this stuff, like this mercury poisoning? Well, I didn't, so I kind of looked it up just to see what they said, and they say that the toxic effects include damage to the brain, kidneys, and lungs, sensory impairment, vision, hearing speech, lack of coordination, you know, lots of different things. Seth, have you gotten checked out lately? You know, Seth, you can never really be too sure, you know? I mean, just one couple of friends to another is, I think, what Ashley's saying. Yeah, boner. Wow, Zach will not make eye contact. Isn't that one of the signs? Yes. So those symptoms he's saying do, you know, match. Now, tell me this. Okay. Does this happen to a lot of people? Well, they say the most common source of it is through fish, and that's what he's saying happened to him. No, I mean, I wasn't able to find an exact statistic, but it's not extremely common to get it as severe as he has it. I've never had it. No. No, I actually haven't either. You have not had it? No. I chewed on a thermometer. You did? Oh, well, that'll do it then. You know, speaking of...

3:27:34Speaking of... I made a meteorite one time. You did? Oh, well, Sean, I'm glad you're okay. I choked on a volcano. Oh, wow. Once in Hawaii, I choked on a volcano. Very dangerous. I got it. There's a lot of mercury in there. But speaking of that, cut 14. The rap on you is that you were out at clubs at night, that you were bored with the show, partying, all this. Let's be really clear. David Mamet is one of the greatest American playwrights. It is my dream to be on Broadway. I was living my dream. We had brilliant reviews. We were sold out every night. This was the greatest time of my life, Diane. I would have loved to go out. I couldn't do it. My body was fighting this mercury toxicity to the point where if I had a glass of red wine, it was too much. I think it makes for a great story, to be honest with you. Yeah, but what about your fellow cast? Mates there. And David Mamet saying that you're leaving to become a thermometer. He's a brilliant playwright and that's a great line. I'll give him credit. That was hilarious. I couldn't make it through the show. The third day in the hospital, Dr. Robert Stark, who's a cardiologist of 27 years at Yale, said you have a resting heart rate of 47. Your body is desperately trying to catch up. People are dead with a resting heart rate of 65.

3:28:57You don't want to have a heart attack. And when a cardiologist says this to you, you slap them in the face. You don't tell them what to do. You're sitting in a hospital bed. You can either go against doctor's orders or you can listen to the three different doctors that were in the hospital with me. David Mamet, the writer of the play, says he's obviously mad. His leading man has left. He says, yeah, apparently Jeremy Pivens left the show to become a thermometer. Yeah, real funny. That was a great one. I almost died, but anyway. I'm bleeding silver stuff. Silver tears. Anyway, so that's a deal with him. What else is going on? Hey, Kid Rock, who are you musically? Cut 25.

3:29:56I feel like musically every day I can wake up and be a different person. I love it. I wouldn't change it for the world. I wouldn't pigeonhole myself into one thing. I wouldn't go too far left or too far right. That explains everything. Oh, good. Well said. Yeah, now I get it. So, Sky, there's a release date for the Metallica Guitar Hero? Yep. What is it? Let me pull that up for you, Mike. While you're doing that, while you're pulling that up, you got it? Yep. March 29th is the release date for Guitar Hero. But they have different release dates for Xbox. So Xbox is that date, March 29th. That's Xbox and PS3. But PS2 and the Wii will be in early May. Hey, Kirk from Metallica. What do you think about seeing yourself on Guitar Hero? Cut 23. Once they've actually made a virtual you and you start seeing...

3:30:55That virtual you playing Metallica songs. Tell them how excited we were. It's not your time. We never hear from it. Hey, Kurt, tell them that deal. It's weird and different, but oddly familiar at the same time. It was familiar. Hey, I'll take over from here. Thank you, Kurt. Anyway, this is Lars from Metallica. It was so weird seeing myself on a video game. Nobody asked you. We got it, Lars. Hey, you guys, do you have anything you want to interview me about? No. You said it all, bro. Here's my wooden shoes. You guys want to smoke them with me? You guys get a lot of calls every morning that people take on Sky or Ashley or giving Eddie or Sean stuff. Every one of you are great. Thank you, man. The Mikey Show continues on The Rock. My parents sacrificed quite a bit to provide me with an education. My mother raised four of us by herself and she wanted us to go to college. My mom got to ninth grade. I think my dad just finished high school. My father always wanted to have his degree, but never got to that point. I was the first in my family to graduate from college, but I won't be the last.

3:32:06My name is Michael. Maria. Diane. And I am a Phoenix. University of Phoenix is a fully accredited institution of higher learning. Learn more at www.phoenix.edu. There will always be doubters. Those who think you're wasting your time. There will be those who are secretly jealous. Those who whisper you don't have what it takes. Who will say you're not college material. Sometimes it pays to be a bad listener. My name is Sharon. I am an entrepreneur with a degree in business management. And I am a Phoenix. University of Phoenix is a fully accredited institution of higher learning. Learn more at www.phoenix.edu. That's why Pep Boys invented one place that can make them all right. Check tires. Pep Boys announces the 1-2-3 tire sale. Buy one tire starting at the incredible low price of $19.99. That's $19.99. Buy any two installed tires and get a free oil change. Or buy any three installed tires, get a free oil change, and get the fourth tire free. After mail-in rebate, both offers exclude Cornell. Now through Sunday at Pep Boys.

3:33:55Buy three, get the fourth tire free. Plus a free oil change. Pep Boys, the people who brought you buy three, get the fourth tire free, are now bringing you free oil changes as well. Call 1-800-PEP-BOYS or pepboys.com. We are under attack. On January 23rd. We can be slaves. We can be life. There's a break-ins. Begins. Do you know what happens to a car on fire? That heat can warp a car's frame, ruin airbags, and destroy electrical systems.

3:34:54The first step to finding out about vehicles with fire damage, ask your used car dealer for a free Carfax vehicle history report or go to Carfax.com. Hungry for a great deal? Now at Togo's, get daily specials for only $3.99. A new sandwich every day. Get your favorite Togo sandwich for only $3.99. For a limited time only, great sandwiches, great value, only at Togo's. by Sleep Train Mattress Centers. Up to speed and problem-free throughout all our county freeways right now. Now's a great time to be on the roadway. Nothing slowing you down at all, so enjoy the ride if you're out and about. There is a high wind advisory still in effect through the mountains and deserts along I-8 between Alpine and the Imperial County. High-profile vehicles like Campers Motorhomes and Big Rigs are being advised to maybe suspend travel along that stretch for right now, but if you have to, be very, very careful. Winds are gusting up pretty good out there. And the border wait still over two hours in some lanes of San Ysidro. I'm Rick Lawrence on Rock 105.3. Hi, we're the Miller family. I'm Jenny, and this is my husband, Paul. We all talk a lot. But our chatterbox daughter. Duh, I'm a teenager. So we switched to Verizon Wireless. So I can call more of my friends without using any minutes. And I can open our wireless bill without my head exploding. Now your family can get unlimited talk with over 80 million Verizon Wireless customers. That's more than with any other national carrier. It's the largest mobile-to-mobile calling family in America. Call more people. Use zero minutes.

3:36:18Explode no heads. Switch to Verizon Wireless and talk all you want to over 80 million people. And you can still add a line anytime for just $9.99 monthly access per line after the first two lines for $69.99 monthly access with new two-year agreement. Visit any Verizon Wireless store, Circuit City, VerizonWireless.com, or call 1-800 to join in. Activation, early termination, and other fees apply. Coverage details at VerizonWireless.com. Morning Show continues. Featuring... Mikey. If it involves danger, I try to avoid it. Eddie. I'm a simple man. Sean. I invite everyone with just a little bit of enthusiasm. Boston Rob. I hate the Yankees. You know this. And Ashley. The Mikey Show's on. It's the Mikey Show. It is 9.39. Johnny Knoxville.

3:37:27Phil was busted at LAX yesterday morning when security screeners found a grenade in his carry-on bag. The Rams eliminate interim coach Jim Hazlett from consideration. They narrow the field down to four guys. Some text messages that we're getting. Ash, I would like to come over to listen to the podcast. I was curious if I would need anything like... a snorkel. That's P1. You're lucky I'm eating. Okay. Come on. B-Rob will not only will I pay to come see you, but I will also co-sign anything that you want. That's P1 Vodka. Please, please, pretty please do the comedy showdown every month. I laughed so hard. Coffee came out of my nose. That's the best. That's a good sign. P1J. Live out loud. Oracle, who do you like in the playoffs? That's P1 Beef Chucky. Well, here we go. Let's talk about it. What do you got, Eddie? AFC, NFC Championships here to determine who's going to go to the Super Bowl. Yeah, break it down, please. Well, I'll tell you the game that I'm going to give you is the lock.

3:38:49It's the lock of the week, guaranteed. Go put your house on this. I wouldn't. I'm telling you. I'm listening. This is good. You're making me nervous. Talk about it. I'm very nervous. In the AFC side of things, Pittsburgh is going to run away with this. I think the Steelers, the Ravens, they've given it all they've had. They've got some injuries now. I feel like the Steelers are hitting a stride with that defense and the way that they're playing. I think the Steelers win pretty handily. I'm going to say something like 23 to 9. All right. NFC, I've gone back and forth. I kind of am trying to not get too wrapped up in the whole I want to see the Cardinals in the Super Bowl type of a thing because I really kind of do. Somebody likes a player on the team. I understand. I like the way Philadelphia is playing. Brian Westbrook, I have a feeling he's going to have a big game. But I can't seem to get away from the feeling that Arizona at home with the momentum is going to pull this out and win this football game. It's going to be close, but I think they win by a field goal 30 to 27. Dude. If they win, Eddie, and it's Pittsburgh.

3:40:03Arizona. Arizona. I mean, I can't even believe that Arizona could possibly have a chance to play for a Super Bowl championship. It would be crazy. And like you said, that means they would be getting a Super Bowl before San Diego. How is that possible? Fitzgerald. That's how it's possible. That's the answer. You know what I mean? He's magical. It's one word. You guys, yesterday, President Bush gave his last press conference ever. Yeah. I mean, it was like a little speech to say goodbye. Yep, his farewell address. Cut three. Tonight I'm filled with gratitude to Vice President Cheney and members of my administration. To Laura, who brought joy to this house and love to my life. To our wonderful daughters, Barbara and Jenna. To my parents, whose examples have provided strength for a lifetime. Thank the American people for the trust you have given me. I thank you for the prayers that have lifted my spirits. And I thank you for the countless acts of courage, generosity, and grace that I have witnessed these past eight years. Clapping because he's leaving. Is that why we're clapping? Because I'll clap. Bravo! Actually, Sky. Job well done, sir. We got the band back together, you know, for this. What band? Well, it was me and Eddie.

3:41:34And Boston Rob and Zeth. Mendo Boys. And Sean. That's right. Yeah, Mendo Boys. We got Mendo Boys. I've never heard of that band. You've never heard of Mendo Boys? No. You're nuts. We got men to boys together yesterday. Motown Silly. Motown Silly is probably my favorite one they do. And I'll Make Jokes at You. You know that song? It's one of my favorite songs by them ever. It was a hit. But, you know, we got together and we were saying goodbye to President Bush and it was really an emotional thing. Yeah, that's right. Somebody's got some bad breath. This one's for the ladies. What's up? Oh, yeah. So goodbye to a guy who's not so smart. What the fuck? E.P. shot a guy in the face and made us laugh. Thought you'd be a chief forever. It's not hard to say goodbye.

3:43:07You're welcome. Wow. That's quite a... Phenomenal, yes. Acapella, bitch. Yes. This is the Mikey Show. You've given everyone a great way to start my day, so we thank you. Thank you. Thank you very much. Rock 105.3. Enormous or of... Epic proportions. Thousands of guitars, amps, and drums. Liquidate to eliminate, typically by extreme measures. 50, 60, up to 70% off list. Clearance, an event where...

3:45:18Everything must go. Wall-to-wall deals stacked and tagged to move by Sunday night. Musicians, this weekend, it's Guitar Center's massive clearance blowout. Look at Epiphone Les Paul Sanders' list over 1,000. Everyday low price, $649. But this weekend, blowout price at just $479. All Zeldin pitch black cymbals slashed to the lowest price ever. 55% off list. And get this, Ibanez Electrics, list $399. We're $199 now. Just $179. Guitar Center's massive clearance blowout event in Sunday. Don't miss it. Brian Wilson will be signing his new DVD, That Lucky Old Son, at Guitar Center La Mesa on Sunday, January 25th. Go to GuitarCenter.com for info. San Diego is about enjoying the outdoors. SoCal Stoneworks' beautiful paving stones set the stage for great San Diego moments. Your memories of barbecues and pool parties deserve a backdrop of beauty, not cracked concrete. When you need help at home, come to your neighbor, SoCal Stoneworks. Call 619-414-3043 or visit us online at SoCalStoneworks.com. SoCal Stoneworks, bringing beauty to our community. Hey, dude. Wow, what's with the three-piece corduroy suit?

3:46:37Alternative energy. See, my cable intro rate expired and I needed some extra cash. So I thought, why not harness the power of static electricity to sell to the power companies? Or you could switch to AT&T. My bundle didn't have an intro rate. My rate started low and stayed low. Besides, I don't think you can create electricity out of static. Oh, yeah? Just watch what happens when I hop on the treadmill. See? I'm generating enough power to light that light bulb. Come on, light bulb! Come on, light bulb! Switch from Cox's Standard Bundle today and get your choice of wireless service or advanced TV, plus high-speed internet and home phone for under $75. That's not an introductory price. Call 1-800-ATT-4U or visit att.com slash triple bundle. AT&T, your world delivered. Taxes and other charges apply. Local and long distance required. Two-year term with wireless bundle with purchase of qualifying handset. For more details on qualifying high-speed internet and digital TV plans, go to att.com slash local market details.

3:47:33Former UFC middleweight champ Rich Ace Franklin takes on former pride welterweight and middleweight champ Dan Henderson. Plus, Mauricio Shogun Hua looks to avenge his loss to UFC Hall of Famer Mark the Hammer Coleman. The Ultimate Fighting Championship presents UFC 93, Franklin vs. Henderson from the O2 Arena in Dublin, Ireland. This Saturday, only on pay-per-view. Visit 93.ufc.com for details. Cards subject to change. You feel like you're in a dream. A dream where Rubio's crispy shrimp is back and a crispy shrimp two taco plates sits in front of you. The shrimp so crisp, its creamy ancho chili sauce so tasty, the beans and chips so fresh. Is this real? If so, could this entire Rubio's meal really cost only $5.99? You turn to your wife and ask her if you're dreaming. No, she says, but you are drooling. Get a crispy shrimp, two taco plate, including beans and chips, all for just $5.99 for a limited time at Rubio's. I got to tell you, AIS is eliminating fees for new customers. And what's really great about that is that a lot of those other agencies and brokerages, they might be charging you those fees. And so if there was, I mean, first of all, there was a lot of other reasons to do it. One, you don't have to worry about it. You call them. They take care of all the legwork for you.

3:48:56You spend a couple minutes on the phone with them, and you can end up saving potentially thousands of dollars. 1-800-777-4AIS. 1-800-777-4AIS. I have them, and I save $1,600 a year. Boston Rob has them. He saves $1,400 a year. P1 Craig has them. He saves $1,500 a year. That's a lot of money, and it's a lot of money that you shouldn't be having to spend on car insurance. If you want to continue to give your car insurance company that money, you can. But if you'd like to save potentially thousands, 1-800-777-4AIS. Welcome to Burger Max. Can I take your order? Yes, I'd like two dark roast coffees and four sugars. So that's two regular coffees and two sugars. No, no, I said dark roast, four sugars. Sure, please. Here you go, sir.

3:49:54This is orange juice. Yeah, orange juice. Extra sugar. Oh, that is so wrong. There's no such thing as a wrong order at a.m. p.m. Stop in and get 20 ounces of perfect every time coffee for just 97 cents. A.m. p.m. Too much good stuff. At participating stores for a limited time. I say it's weird. Did you check the pot? What? Where the coffee comes from? No, I got it at the window. The window. Hey, guys. All right. Who gets his coffee from a window? A window? Dude, come on. Okay, I guess. There's an a.m. p.m. right over there. Get some real coffee. You deserve more than coffee from a window. Dish the dishwater and come to a.m. p.m. for 20 ounces of real coffee for just 97 cents. A.m. p.m. Too much good stuff. At participating stores for a limited time. Connect Tech Support Plus from AT&T makes anyone an instant technical genius. Why don't? Connect Tech Support Plus. Instant genius. Hey, who's the man now, printer?

3:50:52I am. Thank you. Call the U.S.-based experts at Connect Tech seven days a week. For problems too big for the phone, they'll even make house calls. Oh, this stupid program is acting up again. Connect Tech Support Plus. Hi. Instant genius. Is it hot in here or is it my unfrozen computer? Connect Tech tackles the toughest tech questions over the phone. Dude, where's that song I just downloaded? Connect Tech Support Plus. Instant genius. Yeah. Oh, there it is. Let's celebrate with a little air guitar. Connect Tech Support Plus from AT&T. Technology support for you and your home. Call 1-800-344-1734 or go to att.com slash connect tech. Residential customers only not available in all areas. Hardware and software limitations apply. Terms and conditions apply. See att.com slash connect tech for terms and conditions. Thank you very much. Are you overdue for an oil change? If so, don't put your car's engine at risk. Get in the zone. Now at AutoZone, get five quarts of Pennzoil conventional motor oil and a Fram extra guard oil filter for just $16.99. That's right, $16.99. Some restrictions apply. See store for details. Don't wait until it's too late. Maximize your engine's life and performance. Get to AutoZone. Do it yourself and save. Get in the zone. AutoZone.

3:52:09five days in march right here in san diego behind every pitch behind every swing here's the three two to adrian gonzalez behind every catch throw run slide behind every play a nation Get behind your nation. The 2009 World Baseball Classic. The best players on the planet battle it out right here in San Diego. Like Ichiro Suzuki, Adrian Gonzalez, Jorge Cantu, and Chanho Park. March 15th through 19th. All on their way to the championship. The World Baseball Classic. Baseball. Spoken here. Tickets are now available for all six games played right here in San Diego at Petco Park. Purchase your tickets at the advanced ticket windows at Petco Park or visit worldbaseballclassic.com. You know, that microwave is going to give you a micro lunch. Who are you? I'm Guy Fieri, food dude. But more importantly, I'm going to add a little fun time to your lunchtime with Friday's endless soup, salad, twisted garlic bread and drinks. Right. And I'm supposed to pay for it with my endless bank account. Funny, but no. It all starts at $6.99. You can choose from your favorite salads like House and Caesar and the best soups we got like creamy broccoli and cheese.

3:53:33You are so gonna dig it. Okay, I'm sold. But I didn't even tell you about the soft, freshly baked, twisted garlic bread. People dream about it. All that food and a drink for only $6.99. All the soup, salad, twisted garlic bread, and drinks you want for lunch starting at $6.99. So what's the catch? Well, you gotta leave work with all your friends to get it. That ain't a catch, but your endless lunch is. What should I do with this micro-lunch? Ooh, tough one. Maybe put it in that round metal filing cabinet with a lid? Give me more for my lunch. Give me more Fridays. Lunch offer good until 4 p.m. Offer excludes alcoholic beverages, slushes, or flings. Prices and participation may vary while supplies last. Limited time only. Hey, it's Boston Rob from The Mikey Show. During the holidays, I made a lot of calls back home to the East Coast, and I never had to watch my minutes because I have Time Warner's home phone service. Time Warner's free long-distance calling plan is wicked awesome. I can spend as much time as I want talking to all my family back East. And if I want to drop my family an email, I get it done with their Roadrunner Internet service. Time Warner's Roadrunner Internet service is 20 times faster than AT&T's basic DSL. During the holidays, I finished all my online shopping with a quickness. And I am never waiting when it comes to Roadrunner High Speed Online. It's wicked fast and blows DSL away.

3:54:49Switch to Time Warner today and save. 800-872-0185. They have bundles as low as $75 a month. Give them a call now. 800-872-0185. Or check them out anytime at timewarnercable.com. Some restrictions apply. Roadrunner speeds may vary. Cash rebate applies to value purchase triple play customers only. The new year is here and you need to save cash. Ask yourself this. Are you paying too much for auto insurance? Are you looking for ways to save money now? There's an easy solution. Cut the cost of your auto insurance. If you're paying over $17 a month for auto insurance, you're paying too much. Solo has rates as low as $17 and no down payment. That's right, no down payment. What are you waiting for? Pick up the phone. Call 866-491-4447. That's 866-491-4447. Tickets, accidents, new driver, no problem. They can even insure you if you don't have a license. They're that good. With rates as low as $17 a month, Solo has saved hundreds of drivers money on their car insurance. Why not you? So call now, 866-491-4447. 866-491-4447. And start saving money today. For the low rates and zero down, call Solo. 866-491-4447. 866-491-4447. Solo. Rates so low, any lower they'd be free. Restrictions apply. It's KIOZ San Diego.

3:56:17Okay, LZ San Diego. Is he going to hit it? Hit it, man. OMG! The goodbye Bush song. Better be on the best of CD. Oh my gosh. Work was completely stopped at my office. We were laughing so hard. That's P1 Half Pint. Mikey, that was the greatest parody song ever. Just crashed into my neighbor's car laughing so hard. That's P1 Chunk. Mikey, just curious. Was that Sean on the track or a didgeridoo? That's P1 Chunk. That is awesome. Let's see. This text message says, seriously, guys? I mean, really? I just sucked French toast in my lungs. I laughed so hard. That's B1 Jenny Jen Jen. Mikey, looking forward to hearing B-Rob in the stand-up spotlight. That's B1 Green. For sure. Bob did a great job. Yeah, the...

3:57:25It's not hard to say goodbye to President Bush's song. I'm sure will be played a few more times before. I hope so. Before it's time for Bush to bid adieu. It's always, and listen, man, I want to watch when it's happening live. I want to watch all that stuff. You know, history is going to be made on Tuesday. First black president, new president. And it's always a trip, no matter who the president is. It's always a trip seeing him get in that. helicopter. That's what they always do. They walk out onto the White House lawn. They get into this helicopter. And I don't know, I'm sure they'll say, where do they go? Because it's always, that's what they do every time. Clinton, you know, they all do it. They all get in this helicopter and they fly them off somewhere. For the inauguration? No, no, no. When they end their presidency. Yeah, when they end their presidency, that's the way that they always end their presidency. They always end their presidency by walking out of the White House lawn, getting on this helicopter. A beautiful helicopter, you know. It looks like Air Force One, but it's a helicopter. It's big. And they fly them away. And then you really, you never hear, you don't hear from them until they, you know, move into their office building in Harlem. Yeah. You know, you really, you don't hear from them anymore. Their wives try to, you know, take the spotlight. Yes, exactly. Until their wives run for Senate. Yeah. And, you know.

3:58:51And then they have to come out and be like, oh, I support my wife. You know? All right. Exactly. Calm down. Well, it's going to be a trip. And then it's always cool to hear from them years later talk about that experience, like what they said as they were lifting off. You know, because literally that's a, their life is going to be completely different. And they, here's a guy that every single day, His life was waking up, having briefings, being the president of the United States to nothing. Literally nothing. You don't do anything. You wake up and you're like, I have nothing to do. I have nobody to see. I have no appointments. I can go fishing, I guess. I don't have anything to do. It's a trip. Your dad's retired right now, Eddie, right? Same thing, man. It's just such a trip if you have folks that are retired.

3:59:51Talking to them about that life of going from going to work every day to not doing anything. Well, my dad's busier now than he did when he worked. Is he really? My mom makes him do all these crazy projects and stuff like that. That's awesome. My mother-in-law, she loves it. She said it didn't take her long. Took her a couple of weeks of just kind of being weirded out by not working. And then after that, she was happy. That's cool. I don't think there's any of us that wouldn't mind giving that a shot. So what else? What did I miss? What are the big stories? And why don't we do it? You know what? We have a couple of minutes. Why don't we do ask the Oracle? If you have a question for the Oracle. Did you take it down? All right. Do you have a question for the Oracle? Eddie is our sports Oracle. To baseball and everything in between. It's time to talk to the man who knows all. It's time to ask. The Oracle. Eddie is the Sports Oracle. And if you have a question regarding sports, we would love to hear from you. 570-1053. And Eddie will take your questions on whatever sport it is and, you know, tell you what's going on. He made his picks. He says the lock is Pittsburgh and the Ravens. Eddie takes Pittsburgh over the Ravens. Yeah. Yep. And then the other game, you're taking Arizona. Yeah, I am.

4:01:21You know, it's going to be crazy. I wouldn't be surprised if Philly wins that game, but I'll take Arizona. That's going to be a fun Sunday. Mikey, men to boys is so pitted. Where can I get the CD? That's P1 Welder Boy. Oh my gosh. Mikey, it's not hard to say goodbye is instant best of 2009 material. That's P1 Mega Man. Crazy. Oh yeah. Mikey, I've got to hear that song again. I will pay cash. That's P1 Slaughter. Oh, Rob, you hear that? Oh, okay. OMG, Mikey, that was awesome. When will men to boys be going on tour with Solstice? That's P1 Slaughter. That's a legitimate question. That's not cool. There it is. Mikey, that was the most magical song I've ever heard in my life. Brought a tear to my eye. I want the album. Men to boys rocks. That's P1 Predator. Mikey, so, so, so, so awesome. Men to boys, I'd like them to sing at my wedding. We can do that. And the next text is all in caps. OMG, Mikey, I'm laughing so hard my eyes are crying. I had to pull over because I couldn't see. Now my face hurts. That's P1 Rhino. There you go. All right, you ready to ask the Oracle? Yeah. Let's get some calls on here. P1 Gunsling, are you there?

4:02:43Yeah, good morning, guys. Good morning. Hey, why do quarterbacks always lick their fingers, even when they're not going to throw them? When they're on the sidelines, you always get them in the camera licking their two fingers. I don't know that I've seen quarterbacks licking their fingers on the sidelines. Maybe. They're delicious. It's actually kind of a weird thing that they do. They do it to get a better grip on the football, obviously. And what's weird about that is that there are a lot of quarterbacks that have, problems with their children as far as like autism or um some sort of uh birth defects and there was a little bit of a study done where they were starting to think that it was from The grass, you know, they put all so much chemicals and pesticides on the grass, and they're sitting there licking their fingers, and they were wondering if that was part of it. It could be. It's kind of dangerous. I wouldn't be licking my fingers if I were a quarterback. Keep a little sponge in your pocket or something. There you go. Well, they say that. Or a neck. Yeah. A sponge around your neck. Yeah, you just dip it in there like you're doing stamps, you know, or like you're doing whatever. Yeah. Cool. Thanks for the call, Gunslinger. No problem. Have a good one. You too. P1 Matt. Matt.

4:03:56Hey, Mitch. Hey, Mitch. Yeah, Eddie, for your first thought, how do you feel about this card coming up for the UFC fight and the fighters? And my second question, is St. Peter going to take it? Well, are you talking about the card tomorrow or the card on the 31st? Tomorrow. Tomorrow? It's, you know, I'm not really hyped up about this card. It's, you know, Dan Henderson, Rich Franklin as the main event, you know, coming off of. This huge card they just had, the ultimate, ultimate, where they were like, every fight was amazing. I'm like, Rich Franklin and Dan Henderson as the main event, I'm kind of snooze, snooze. But, you know, hopefully it'll be a good fight. I really don't expect it to be a good fight. I think it's going to go three rounds, and Dan Henderson will probably take it by decision. I don't know. And then, you know, the secondary fight is UFC Hall of Famer Mark Coleman. who's coming basically out of retirement to start fighting again. He's taking on Shogun, who has been on the injured list for almost a year. That fight, I'm like, I don't even know what to think of that fight. It's such a weird matchup. So I'm kind of blah about it a little bit, and hopefully it'll surprise me. And as far as the GSP-BJ Penn fight, yeah, I love GSP in that fight. I just think he trains like a monster. He's a crazy athlete.

4:05:22BJ Penn isn't training that hard, which disappoints me. They're running this special on Spike TV where they're showing their training camps. And BJ Penn decided to take five days off. Five? In the middle of his training camp. To do what? Well, he didn't want to peak too soon. Oh, yeah. He's very Hawaiian, laid back kind of a guy. And doesn't like to train. And that was his big problem early in his career. And then something happened to him where it was like, oh, okay, I do need to train like five hours a day and eat the right foods and not party and stuff like that. And he's become almost unbeatable. And watching that and seeing him take five days off made me go, oh, no, you're turning into BJ Penn again. What did he do in the five days? He went to Kona. He lives in Hilo. He went to Kona with his girlfriend for five days. Are you serious? That sounds nice. And word got back to Dana White, and Dana White's calling him and calling him and like, what are you doing, man? Knock that off. That's brutal. So I'm going with GSP just because of that. A couple of the text messages that we're getting. Eddie.

4:06:27If you had a video game, Papani09. What? Who would you put on the cover? I'd put Boston Rob on the cover. I like it. All right. He's awesome. Yeah, he is good. Awesome. Oracle, how do you feel about Denver hiring Josh McDaniels and Mike Nolan? Questionable. Do you see a Ron Rivera taking a... HC job or staying? Head coach. Head coach, job, or staying. That's people in Broncos fan. Questionable hire in Josh McDaniels. I mean, he's 32. He hasn't been a coordinator for that long. And you got to wonder, you know, that offense was kind of already there, put in place when Josh got the job. You know, this guy could be a wonder kid and all of a sudden be like this great head coach. But I don't know. You know, I've not sold on him yet. He's got to show me that he can. that he can do it there in Denver. And Ron Rivera will stay as the defensive coordinator for now. A couple more calls. P1 Nick, are you there? Nick, text messages for the Oracle. What do you think of Linehan becoming the Niners' new offensive coordinator? That's P1 Clean Joey. That's good. You know, I mean, anytime you can get a guy that was a head coach back to what he was doing before he got hired, I think that's cool.

4:07:50So hiring him, hiring the Mike Nolans, hiring those kind of guys, there was a reason why they were thrust into a head coaching role is because they were good coordinators. So, I mean, those are good hires, real good hires. Let's see. Mikey and gang, thanks so much for three great years. Miss you guys. Moving back to Boston this weekend. Thanks so much. You guys are awesome. That's P1 Woody Poo. That was right in the middle, Eddie, by the way, of all of the sports stuff. I thought we were doing Ask the Oracle. Boston Rob, as you know, he's the text message editor. Don't you edit that out? Or maybe save it until after Ask the Oracle is done. Not really sure where he was going with that one. That seems weird. Let's hear one last call from Kieran Redneck Sailor. I feel that way. Hi, Redneck Sailor. Hey, how you doing? Good, how you doing? Oracle, do you think that Kurt Warner will retire after this season regardless of what happens in the playoffs? I'm going to have to say no. I mean, when you're coming off an all-pro season, if this guy goes to the Super Bowl again, you obviously have stuff left in the tank. And when you're a professional athlete,

4:09:03If you know you have stuff in the tank, it's so almost next to impossible to retire. Just look at number four, you know what I'm saying? No, wow. That was really an uncomfortable wink. So, yeah, no, I think Kurt's coming back for at least another year. There you go. There you go, Redneck Sailor. I appreciate it. Thank you, brother. Thank you. I didn't hear a word. You guys were having a hard time there. At the same time. Every time you say something. And then pause together. And then talk again. Skye says... Are you serious? She likes to start strong and end strong. Are you serious? Any way I could get a copy of that? Skye says that yesterday... Her and her husband went down to Chula Vista. He woke her up, by the way, from a nap. He woke her up and made her go with him to Chula Vista to look at a VW. He's obsessed. 30 minutes into my only nap of the whole week, he wakes me up because we gotta go to Chula Vista to look at a bug. Which we end up not getting. You didn't get it. Why not? Why can't he go do that by himself?

4:10:29Well, there's a lot going on here. My best friend's husband is a mechanic. And they live in Chula Vista. And so he wanted him to go with him. And I haven't seen my best friend in a while. And she wasn't working. She works all the time. She was actually going to be home. So he's like, oh, you can go with me. And then we can go have dinner with them. And you'll get to see Michelle. And, you know, and then once he said that, I'm like, okay, well, I do. I do want to see Michelle. So I guess I'll get up. go and yeah and so and he didn't get the bug because it turned out the VIN number didn't match the the if it's a convertible it has a 5 in it and this VIN number had a 1 in it which means it was probably a regular one that they chopped up to make it a convertible which isn't an original convertible which isn't as desirable I don't know He's really into the VW stuff. Dude, get that guy his car. Get him his car. Just get him done. Just stop. Just get the job done, will you? Just leave me alone. So you're not being woken up from naps to go to Chula Vista? Wow. It has been nuts. Yeah. I don't know. He's on a kick. What can I say? Ashley's really on a diet lately. She yesterday made some light bisquick, you know, because she wanted to make some pancakes. So she used the light bisquick.

4:11:51To make the pancakes. As opposed to the regular. Yeah, because she's watching her figure. And then she had maple syrup on it and had 12 of them. And then... They were mini, though. They were mini pancakes. Because I'm watching my weight. Yeah, because she's looking at her figure. So they're mini pancakes. She had 12. And I'm going to go with a filet of fish sandwich. Right. Since that has less calories because it's fish. It's healthier. And then when she was... She finished. She had two rows of brownies. Because she was, you know. Only two. Just two. You know why, Eddie? Because usually she'll have four. And she was like, you know what? She's trying to slim up. So she was like. I'm just wanting a four-nugget thing. I'm trying to watch my calorie intake. Just trying to lower it. How? Down. Let me tell you something, Eddie. That's crazy. I hope she continues to run 47 miles every day. She has to. Like she does. You better start running to work. You know what I'm saying? And a small. A small. Oh. Chocolate shake. Because I'm trying to wash my figure. Not a large, a small. Thank you. I don't understand this text message. It says, Eddie, do you think I can withdraw money from my credit union at Pecto Park? This guy, look at this. There's one text on the whole entire... Rob just gave me... I mean, you're going to waste a sheet of paper for that. Yes.

4:13:07Rob is the text. There's one sentence on that sheet of paper. He does a stand-up act. He's got one person on the show in that stand-up act that he makes fun of. I love it. That is a big compliment. You're welcome. No, I never said thank you. That's his little thing for you. Yeah, great. I feel so honored. Let's see. Bear Grylls had a son. What did he name him? Well, so this is his third son. First son named Jesse. Okay. Second son named Marmaduke. Third son, Huckleberry Edward Jocelyn. Huckleberry. Huckleberry Edward Jocelyn? Jocelyn, which I thought was a girl's name, but who am I to judge? My middle name's Alan, so what am I to say? Huckleberry? Huckleberry. That's awesome. There you go. That's your boy. Well, his name is Bear, so... That's normal. That's a normal first name? Oprah Winfrey's ex-boyfriend says that she used to smoke crack. What? What?

4:14:35Sorry, Ashley. I guess he's writing a book, and that's what he says. Who says that? Yeah. So Oprah has admitted that she used cocaine in the 70s, but some guy she had an affair with back in the early 80s is writing a tell-all book, and it's called The Wizard of O, My Life with Oprah. Oh, pathetic. Yeah, and he said that back in the early 80s that she smoked crack cocaine and was the one who introduced him to it. Crack is whack. So, you know, that's something very intense to say. I mean, that's lawsuit material. Yeah, for sure. If that's not true. So we'll see if Oprah files legal action against that. I mean, and how's he going to prove it? Has he got pictures of her smoking a crack pipe? You know it. And you have to prove it, right? You think? Let's see. Foo Fighters, live at Wembley Stadium. Stadium is going to air tomorrow on VH1. Oh, sick. Yeah. And it'll be live? No, no. This is a DVD that they released when they did two shows over there in London, and they performed with John Paul Jones and Jimmy Page of Zeppelin. And so, you know, it's out on DVD, but VH1's going to air the whole thing tomorrow night. So that's going to be really, really awesome. Brian Head Welch, former lead guitar player for Korn, now a born-again Christian.

4:15:58is holding open auditions for a band. Yeah, for his touring band, his solo touring band. And so you can go to his website, brianheadwelchband.com. That's brianheadwelchband.com. Kind of weird. There is a $25 application fee for people who want to... apply to be part of the band. The deadline for submitting your stuff is February 2nd. Why is there a fee? I don't know. What does it say? It just says in this thing, I am in reading, open auditions, touring band, initially keeping tryouts close to the general public, anyone who thinks they have the stuff can go to this website. There is, believe it or not, a $25 application fee and deadline for submitting is February 2nd. That's all it says. That is weird. Skye has a list of the top music acts of 2008. Oh, here we go. Okay, so this includes... Yeah, it does. For sure. Solstice. Solstice. Men to boys. Number one. Men to boys. Were they on there? So this puts together... Her headphones are off. Skye! What about Solstice? Is it Solstice?

4:17:19For this list, they combine concert ticket sales, album sales, and downloads to come up with this list. Lemon drops and sandals. Number one. Number one. I've got the top five here for you. Dave Matthews Band. Never. Well, since you brought it up, they are 16th on the list, but we're only doing the top five. We're only doing the top five. Wow. You too. They're awesome, dude. Not really. Madonna. Madonna's number one, bringing in $120 million in 2008. Miley Cyrus. Sky won't dignify that. She doesn't even acknowledge you, right? Well, if I said no every time you guys gave a wrong answer, I'd lose my precious pipes. Joni loves Chachi Band. Yeah. Remember how they started to have a singing career when they lived with Al? Oh, I forgot about that. So they're probably on the list.

4:18:26They were good, dude. I like them. That Chachi can see. Big take now. Do you acknowledge us? We're human beings. I will not acknowledge the Joni and Chachi band. Why? Because it's obviously not a legitimate guest. What do you mean it's obvious? What do you mean obviously? Very retro. Led Zeppelin. You're such a jerk. You are so... Is that a bad guess? Is that a bad guess? Is that a bad guess? Is that a bad guess? I don't know, Sky. Is that a bad guess? Sky! Are you protecting your pipes?

4:19:25I don't know. I give up. Number five was ACDC making $82 million. They were touring? I thought they just barely put out an album. Yeah, they had an album out. It was pretty big this year. They sold a lot of copies. I know, but I thought they just... I mean, it's so demeaning, you know. It's so demeaning. Are you talking about Eddie? Yeah, he's kind of rude sometimes. Playton disregard for the pipes on that one. Number four is the Eagles. Making 90.7 million. I was going to say that, but I didn't think they were touring. Did they tour? Well, I know they had that big album this year. Oh, no. Sold a lot of copies. Oh, no. Oh, gosh. Why do you? Beyonce. Sasha Fierce. Oh, yeah. Sasha Fierce. Number three, Kenny Chesney. I'm just going to keep going. 95.7 million. And then finally, number two this year. Leave the door. Number three. for 2008 was Celine Dion making just under $107 million. There you go. You're crazy, man. The Gary Schoenweather Project. Number two. That's what they sound like. It's like Rob's Fergie face.

4:21:03570-1053 is our number at the beginning and end of every show. We do open phones so you can call about anything you want. Rob was just racing over to the text. And he's like waiting for it to come out. It's like the microwave was about to bleep. Mike, do you get any texts? Yes, I do. Mikey, if Ashley didn't have her pit sweat problem... She would outweigh Sean. That's P1 Grim. That might be true. Seriously. I mean, she works out. That's what keeps her thin. You eat how Blunder looks. Wait a minute. Sky. Sky. Mikey, asking for money in audition keeps out the riffraff. That's P1 Brie. Never heard of it. Mikey, is the pimp five on the list? They don't sing. They just dance. They're a dance troupe. It's not a troupe, Eddie. A dance troupe? Yes, it is. So, Mike, there's a 1210 or a 310 at Edwards Cinema in San Marcos. Which one are we going to? Whichever one's later, yo. I just want the nighttime and, you know, the 40s.

4:22:20Mike and I are going to go see Notorious. Oh, I want it too. Can I go? No, it's just we're going to be busy with our 40s and blunts. Yeah, we're taking our 40s and blunts. I like 40s and blunts. I watch anything about hip-hop. I'm a hip-hop connoisseur. I checked into the time. Yes, I am there. You guys are going to have a blast. You know what? It actually looks... It looks pretty good. I think it's a serious movie. I don't think it's like a, it doesn't look like it's stupid. It looks like it's actually supposed to be kind of like, it's about Biggie Smalls, right? I don't know anything about him, but I'd be interested. His mother said that the guy that plays him, Jamal, whatever, is like dead on. Like dead on. Get it? Totally capture it all. Oh, wow. I don't think that's too soon. Too soon. Way too soon. Too soon. Cut 39. Maybe in the right hands, I could be like one of the greatest. How old are you? 19. By the time you're 21, I'll make you into a millionaire. You guys know Biggie Small's music? Dude, hey. Are you kidding? Wow, I just got looked at like I just got here from Mars.

4:23:38Born yesterday. Yo, man, come on. Sean, do you like Biggie Smalls? I never really cared much for her, but the music's catchy. Sean likes the old school rap. Yeah, I'm like a public enemy, ice cube type guy. Sonny, Sonny, Sonny. Eddie, did you like it? Hell to the yes. Speaking of, guess who's on the line? What do we got? P1AO. Is that player with more flavor than your kitchen, pimpies? Let's hear it, pimpies. What's up? Oh, man, you know, I'm trying to, you know, dip and dodge in the raindrops. You know what I'm saying? I do. I actually know what you're saying. What's going on, Ayo? Yeah, it's not even raining out. It's very dry. Ayo, you want to meet me in Sky? You want to meet me in Sky for Notorious later today? At home skillet, me and my boys, we already round enough to go down there to get in line and all that. We got, you know what I'm saying, a couple of foul owls. You know what I'm saying? Some fried chicken. Yes. Anything you got.

4:24:38I'm offended. You don't know, maybe he does. Oh, man, then I'm really, then I was offensive. No, dude, we're actually taking fried chicken. Is there a rule against black people having fried chicken? Why is everybody making a big deal about black people having fried chicken? So, A, what's new with you? Oh, man, you know, I actually got a date coming up, man. You have a date? What's his name? All right, Eddie. You really got robbed. Ayo, who are you going out with? I was just lying. He doesn't really have a date. I know. Can people go to Ayo.com and, like, leave a message? Ashley, what's going on? Ashley, what? Ashley. Ayo. She no good stuff. Ayo. Yeah, what up? Why aren't you telling them what you did? Oh, yeah, I hit up Ashley to see if she wanted to go with me to the movies to go see that 3D movie. Ashley, he asked you out? What the hell? She's single. She's single. What's a young woman to do? What's the problem? Why is everyone freaking out? Ashley, what did you, did he do this online or did he do it like, what did he do? He did it via email and I just got the email and it was so weird that he called in because I was like.

4:25:54wanting him to so I could call him on it on the air. And what are you... I mean... I'd rather humiliate somebody both publicly and publicly. He wrote... It was really simple. It was like, if you're not too busy this weekend, you want to go see that 3D scary movie with me, just a friend thing. If so, shoot me a text. That's pretty nice. There's no pressure there. Weird, I didn't get that. Yeah, I don't know. That's odd. Well, I haven't checked my email. That is so weird, you guys. I talk to you all the time. Yeah, that's odd. That is so weird. Get that friend thing. Yeah, but you guys, I'm... I actually did get that email. That's really bizarre. That is creepy. Ash, what are you going to do? Dude, I'm down. Wow, look at you. She has no friends, Mike. That's true. That's probably a good idea. She's got no plans. She's got no plans. Give me a break. Bring the dog. It's either that or looking at the wall again for an hour. She's like, what? Do something? Do you want to go to the movies? I'm just going to brush my teeth again. I was going to eat four more plates of brownies.

4:27:05Aw. Ayo, well, look at that. You have a friendly date this weekend. Man. Hey, thanks, Ashley. I appreciate it, man. Good looking out. That's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm talking about. Thank you, Ayo. Real quick. Yeah, go ahead. Hey, I want to know, did anybody... Will you marry me? Really? Oh, really? Really? You know what I'm saying? Did anybody see America's Best Dance Crew last night? I recorded it. What the hell? Hey. What is that? Are you serious? Randy Jackson's American? The Jabbawockeez, bro. Get with it. Eddie, did you see it? Yeah. Yeah, I bet Eddie watched it twice. It's so good when the black guys danced. Really? That's the best. Were they good? That's the best. They're the best. Okay. Eddie, don't hold his eyes. No, homie, what's up? Dude, I recorded it, A.O. You hurt my feelings. Don't worry. You guys will watch it after my bloody Valentine. Hey, what up? You know what I'm saying? All right. I can't wait to... Hey, can you guys do me a favor? Have somebody take a picture of the two of you wearing those 3D glasses, will you? Can you please do that? Hey, for shizzles. Thank you. Thank you, AO. All right. Talk to you later. P1 Texas Red. Hey there, Mikey. How you doing today, man? Good, dude.

4:28:23Cool, cool. I wanted to wrap with B-Rob real quick, if that's all right. Sure, man. He's right here. Yeah, what's up, dude? Hey, B-Rob, I just want to talk to you real quick about your stand-up today, brother. What's up? You know, one of the coolest things about stand-up comedy is when it's quotable, you know? And Blunder did all right. I think he did pretty good. But I got to tell you, man, every time I go to the zoo from here on out, you're going to be able to catch me at that Leopard exhibit. The leopards. That's really funny. That's really hilarious. Let me tell you, those leopards are fast. They are fast. That's awesome. I want to let you know, man, in case you're ever looking for an agent who will do some work for free. Here they come, Rob. He's already got one. Thank you, sir. Yeah. Thank you. You're his manager, not his agent. Same thing. We're good. He's got both titles. We're good. Thank you. Thank you for calling. See you later, guys. See you soon. Thanks. I appreciate it, though. No, Rob. We'll talk later. Where are you booking him, Eddie? Well, he's going to be at my house tomorrow. New story. Yeah, broadcasting live. It's your first gig, Rob. It's your first paid gig. There you go. Nice.

4:29:38Hey, at the end of the show on Fridays, I give people my testimony. I tell you a little bit about where I've been and where I've come to as a result of a lot of events happening in my life. And, you know, I've told this story many, many times. And every Friday that I tell it, it's a challenge to come up with a new spin, a new direction, a new way to make it sound fresh and be impactful for people. And maybe just saying that is the way to make it different. But what I can tell you is that I'm a different person today than I used to be. I used to not have the ability to see outside of just caring for me. It's the only thing that I was ever capable of doing and seeing things in my own way.

4:30:46abusive past, from sexual abuse when I was a kid. And I also come from a lot of insecurity, a lot of insecurity, a lot of low self-esteem. And when I got into my 20s, I went through so many periods, and I went through an awkward period until I was 37 years old. And during all that time, like I said, the only way that I could see it was my way. I say, that anger is hurt and sadness and fear, and I had all of them. I spent a majority of my life being fearful of everything. When I was a kid, I was afraid I was going to get kidnapped. I was afraid of the cops. I was in constant fear all the time of everything. Manifested itself in anger so that by the time I was in my 20s and I was starting to drink a lot, I had developed a lot of resentment for a lot of people. Resentment is a really, really...

4:31:56Tricky thing. It's tricky and it's destructive. Resenting somebody is a lot like drinking poison and expecting them to die. Resentment's a lot like drinking poison and expecting them to die. They're not going to die, but it is poisoning you. By the time I was in my early 30s, I was drinking so much and it isn't a thing where one day you're not addicted and the next day you are. It's a little trickier than that. But I drank because I wanted to escape all that stuff. And eventually I got to the point where I was addicted to it. And one night I was laying in bed and I was just, man, I was so pitiful. I was laying there just thinking how pathetic I was and how pathetic my life had become. Closing drapes, turning off cell phones, turning the ringers off on phones. Family worrying about me. My wife.

4:33:23told me last night that there were nights when I used to drink that she wasn't sure if I was alive or if I was dead. And she was always afraid to get a phone call saying that I died. Eddie, you did too? Sky, did you ever have that? Oh, definitely, yeah. I remember one time I came over to your house fully expecting to find my best friend dead. Really? Yeah. It's tough, man. That's tough. There may be somebody in your life right now that is like that. I know that the reason that it happened that night was because I was going to be telling you this story on the radio. This is such an amazing opportunity for me to be able to have

4:34:50a radio show where I can tell you about this one particular part in my life where I was laying there in that bed that night and there was tears streaming down the side of my face as I was laying there because I knew I was going to die. I asked Christ to just, and as I started to think that it was like the tears were just coming out more and more and it was just a constant stream of tears right into my, right onto the side of my face, onto my ears. And I was just laying there thinking, can you please change this? Because I can't do it anymore. And there's people that are listening right now that either you're in that situation, you're going through a divorce or you're going through a separation or a breakup or maybe you've lost somebody. You've lost your mom or your dad or your husband or your wife or a boyfriend or a girlfriend or you've lost somebody really important to you. This economy has got you in a place where you're unemployed or you think you're going to lose your job or there's something going on where you're just so worried about what's going to happen in your life and you feel like there's just no hope. I asked Jesus Christ to come in.

4:36:17And ever since then, he's been doing this work, but I had to just give it up. I had to give it up that night. And so many things from that point until today that I didn't even know that they were going on. They were happening. And I can't tell you how amazing it is. Weird, amazing, supernatural. When I'll now be reading my Bible and be reading about things. That have happened to me as a result of it. That I didn't even put those things. I'd never read that before. And then I read it and I was like, that happened to me. That's real. It really happened to me. Every once in a while I'm doing this. It doesn't happen very often. Every once in a while when I'm doing this, I get it. It's like this thing I get in my heart. And I say, okay, today's the day where I want you to say the website. A couple of websites here.

4:37:31One is my website, mikeyshow.com. When you get there, there's a little keyword section up at the top. Type in the keyword help, and that'll take you to resources. And the other one is if you're feeling, or if you're feeling like you don't have, if you're feeling desperate, the church that I go to is called North Coast Church. This doesn't have anything. They've never asked me to mention them. And the only reason that I do mention them is because it's something physical and tangible where you can actually go and maybe find something out. That's the reason I give you the website. It's northcoastchurch.com. It's the best church. It's the best church in the world, man. And I play this song for you. The song is about hope. Put a price tag on hope. Listen to the words of the song. It's really an amazing, amazing song, and the words are all about hope. It's by Third Day, and the album's called Wherever You Are. If you want to download it, the song is called Tunnel. It's all about hope.

4:38:45Lovely and talented Missy is coming up next and we'll see you again on Monday. Congratulations to Rob. We won the comedy show. We'll see you again on Monday. Mikey shows up.